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Speaker 1: I dumped my pregnant girlfriend, called the police, press charges,

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Speaker 1: and now she wants a paternity test.

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Speaker 2: My the a hole, you know, you know, dunber call

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Speaker 2: the police. She's only pregnant, you know, you know.

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Speaker 1: Then for herself, do a little like Roman birth birth.

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Speaker 1: What's that? It's like like back in ancient Rome, if

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Speaker 1: they didn't like their kid, they would just like release

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Speaker 1: it into the forest and be like, the gods will

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Speaker 1: take care for yourself, if you are meant to be,

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Speaker 1: if you will live. Oh my god, not the most uh.

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Speaker 2: One would say that that's maybe not in the in

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Speaker 2: the parenting one on one book.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, not in like what to do when you're expecting. Yeah, yeah,

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Speaker 1: it's not. It's not in there. I would imagine a

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Speaker 1: pair a nice place in the forest, step one, build

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Speaker 1: an st Okay, here we go. I'm sorry, I just

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Speaker 1: need somewhat event as literally everyone is saying that I'm

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Speaker 1: a massive dick for kicking my pregnant ex out over this. Oh,

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Speaker 1: to clarify, this is not the first time she's done this,

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Speaker 1: but this time it cost me over one thousand dollars. Also,

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Speaker 1: sorry if this is choppy, because I am seeing red

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Speaker 1: right now. Ohp is on her freaking mission to post

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Speaker 1: this to Reddit.

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Speaker 2: He is like, get this pregnant woman out of here.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I was imagining. I'm like typing, like desk on,

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Speaker 1: like angry, smashing the keys. So recently I got two

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Speaker 1: massive orders for pastries for two weddings and a few

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Speaker 1: other parties. Man's man, yeah he's getting that cake fucking fines.

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Speaker 1: I had spent one week working with my team on

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Speaker 1: the orders, as it was seventy five to one hundred

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Speaker 1: dollars per item. Well, we finished yesterday and I and

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Speaker 1: the team decided to go out to the movies. Just relax.

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Speaker 1: Big mistake. Oh my, Now X had a party planned

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Speaker 1: without asking me, in the home I pay for while

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Speaker 1: she just sits on her butt doing nothing. She never

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Speaker 1: had a job. She just waits for everyone to hand

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Speaker 1: her every thing she needs. This guy, he's like already

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Speaker 1: calling it out anything in her goddamn laugh. We recently

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Speaker 1: found out she's pregnant a month and a half ago,

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Speaker 1: but she's been using it as an excuse. At first,

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Speaker 1: it was just to eat, you know, one or two

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Speaker 1: of my little pastries, but it gradually became more. Went

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Speaker 1: from one to two. The fifteen to twenty.

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Speaker 2: Sometimes I just need a light, a light twenty, you know,

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Speaker 2: croissants light twenty donuts you know here.

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Speaker 1: Which wasn't exactly an inconvenience. It was only one more batch,

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Speaker 1: and I was fine with that. Whoever, yesterday was the

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Speaker 1: final straw. Uh oh, the final straw or the final questant.

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Speaker 1: When I went out, she threw a party with fourteen

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Speaker 1: of her friends and they got hungry. Uh oh, So

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Speaker 1: they made their way down to the shop and went

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Speaker 1: through nearly everything my team made. My dad owns a bakery.

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Speaker 1: It's not too far down from our house, so it

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Speaker 1: wasn't that hard for her to get in. Well, when

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Speaker 1: we came back, we found my ax and fourteen of

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Speaker 1: her friends had wasted nearly a thousand dollars in pastries.

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Speaker 2: Bro.

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Speaker 1: I nearly lost my ship and started screaming at her,

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Speaker 1: asking what the fuck she was doing and why she

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Speaker 1: thought this was okay. She's eating my man's livelihood. It's

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Speaker 1: just it's just as. She blamed this on her pregnancy

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Speaker 1: cravings and tried to say that she wanted the baby

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Speaker 1: to eat well, Bro, no baby needs to eat that well.

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Speaker 2: That is so good.

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Speaker 1: I was doing it to feed the baby, and it's

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Speaker 1: like our child.

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Speaker 2: It's like, bro, eat a salad or a sandwich.

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Speaker 1: Doesn't need like a thousand dollars with a pastry.

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Speaker 2: Pastries, Like for my business that there's far of my customers,

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Speaker 2: ridiculous for the house that you're living in.

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Speaker 1: The pays of these pas Jades. I kicked her out

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Speaker 1: and had to call and explain everything to both parties.

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Speaker 1: Full refund for them both as there was barely anything

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Speaker 1: that could be salvage. So he just lost out on

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Speaker 1: like a shit ton of money.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, that's way more like a Yeah, he had a

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Speaker 2: thousand dollars worth of pastries, but like how much were

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Speaker 2: those orders and those customers like.

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Speaker 1: A lot, a lot more than that. So there's an

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Speaker 1: update the story. Update update. She ended up calling me

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Speaker 1: on her parents' phone around seven or eight screaming at

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Speaker 1: me for posting our private lives for everyone to see

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Speaker 1: on Reddit.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, maybe that's what we do here.

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Speaker 1: Bobby, talk about your private life. Assume it's going to

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Speaker 1: go out. This is why I never share anything private

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Speaker 1: on this podcast exactly.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, there are zero details of Sam's life whatsoever that

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Speaker 2: are permanently in the ether.

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Speaker 1: God, see what you say it like that, not like fuck?

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Speaker 1: Am I over sharing.

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Speaker 2: A cont I think you're not sharing enough.

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Speaker 1: John's my neighbor.

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Speaker 2: Give us a play by play of you coming out

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Speaker 2: of Boo Boys.

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Speaker 1: All right, well I started playing piano. That she is

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Speaker 1: how it started.

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Speaker 2: Oh that's a move right there, That is a move.

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Speaker 1: I learned this one jazz lik too. Yeah.

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Speaker 2: You like this lick, don't you? I got another one

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Speaker 2: coming right.

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Speaker 1: Up, right up, baby, Swing at those lips. Like those lips.

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Speaker 1: We're not talking about these ones, that's right. She then

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Speaker 1: proceeded to ask me, through crocodile tears, if I would

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Speaker 1: press charges on her and her friends for having fun.

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Speaker 1: I replied yes, and as I was about to hang up,

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Speaker 1: she said, better, what about the baby I'm sipping too,

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Speaker 1: as to which I told her to get a paternity

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Speaker 1: test or it isn't my problem, damn. She then starts

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Speaker 1: to manipulate me and gaslight me, crying, saying it was

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Speaker 1: just her being hospitable to her friends. That make your

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Speaker 1: own damn pastries, woman, and that it was rude to

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Speaker 1: me to yell at them and kick them out. She

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Speaker 1: then proceeds to cry about me not caring about her

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Speaker 1: and I just hung up and blocked her. A man

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Speaker 1: doesn't mess around. He's more heated than that oven. Bro.

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Speaker 2: This guy is amazing. He just goes all the way

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Speaker 2: with it.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, he's like, screw that bun in the oven? What

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Speaker 1: about my bun?

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Speaker 2: What about my buns?

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Speaker 1: Huh?

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Speaker 2: Who's going to feed them?

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Speaker 1: As of right now, I'm fixing to leave for the PD,

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Speaker 1: the police department, and I hope you do come final up,

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Speaker 1: dake Ho. I'm tired as it is, so I'm going

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Speaker 1: to keep this short. One. She tried to break in

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Speaker 1: and vandalize my home while I was making the report,

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Speaker 1: and she got herself brought to the station.

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Speaker 2: Oh my god.

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Speaker 1: The truth came out, or at least part of it.

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Speaker 1: She was never pregnant oo attas she took at the

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Speaker 1: PD prove this, which led her to possible charges of miscarriage,

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Speaker 1: to which she has openly admitted that she was never

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Speaker 1: pregnant and only trying to make sure I didn't leave.

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Speaker 2: Oh my god. No, Okay, everything everything this man has

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Speaker 2: done is now all justified.

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Speaker 1: We had no problems before, so I don't even know

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Speaker 1: why she did this. Three along with charges for damage

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Speaker 1: to my house, I will be pressing charges for the

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Speaker 1: costs on her friends as well as of right now

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Speaker 1: she's sitting in jail waiting for a court day and

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Speaker 1: she doesn't have my kid in her belly. Is that it? Yeah?

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Speaker 1: Oh my god, Wow, man went full vengeance on her ass.

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Speaker 2: Honestly, I mean there's all these crazy stories of someone

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Speaker 2: who like they get a little leeway and then they

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Speaker 2: just go like crazy, like you kind of got to

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Speaker 2: return the favor, like.

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Speaker 1: You know, is he's protecting his his own You got

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Speaker 1: to Karen Karens, Karen, you know what I mean. Out

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Speaker 1: Karen the Karens. You got it.