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Speaker 1: What would you talk about on your on your podcast

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Speaker 1: Firm Presents Minute Morning Show. Is anyone brain fried other

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Speaker 1: than me? First store Buck, I'm I'm sorry. Yeah, it's uh,

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Speaker 1: it's been a week. It's been a week for about

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Speaker 1: five weeks now. Anyway, Welcome to the fifteen Minute Morning

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Speaker 1: Show podcast. There's Froggy, there's Scotty b in the serial library.

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Speaker 1: There's Scary who's shaking his head. Yes, there's Danielle in

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Speaker 1: her basement. There's Gandhi and her boyfriend's apartment. Hello, house House,

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Speaker 1: and there's a Straightenate. You know you didn't say wenel

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Speaker 1: Vief when we started the show this morning. I didn't

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Speaker 1: have my phones on, Elvis, so you may have called

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Speaker 1: to me, but never too late. When the and there's Garrett,

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Speaker 1: and there's Uh in the den, there's the one and

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Speaker 1: only Dave Brody. Hi, Dave Rody, Hello, Elvis, Duran. Well

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Speaker 1: here we go. So before we get going, uh, today's

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Speaker 1: announcement Today, I have an announcement to start the podcast. Ready. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: So I went to King's to do my grocery shopping yesterday.

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Speaker 1: I was very nervous because the COVID rates are elevating

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Speaker 1: and I'm like, oh, get in, get out, don't get

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Speaker 1: in near anyone, you know whatever. So I'm shopping in

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Speaker 1: the produce aisle or the produce section, and uh, there's

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Speaker 1: a woman shopping next to me. She says, you're Elvis

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Speaker 1: Duran and of course I'm fully masked. I'm like, and

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Speaker 1: she takes her her ear butt out. She said, this

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Speaker 1: is really weird. I said why. She says, because I'm

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Speaker 1: listening to your fifty minute morning show podcast right now.

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Speaker 1: Who you're listening to that filth while you're in the

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Speaker 1: produce section? Days, Yes, it was yeah, Yesterda. It would

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Speaker 1: have been posted by then, and it was yeah anyway,

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Speaker 1: So and so I got really embarrassed. Her name is Mendy,

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Speaker 1: very very sweet, sweet person, and thank you for your patients. Mindy.

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Speaker 1: The thing is is we say these things on this show,

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Speaker 1: and then when you're confronted about any of these things

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Speaker 1: in public, you're like, oh god, I am dirty bird,

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Speaker 1: Like I am so sorry, so sorry. The worst for

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Speaker 1: me is when I'm around my parents friends and they're like,

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Speaker 1: we heard you the other day saying blah blah blah.

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Speaker 1: I'm like, shut up, shut up, Sally, don't say that

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Speaker 1: for my mom. Dad. I love that your friends have

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Speaker 1: a your parents have a friend named Sally this moment,

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Speaker 1: Yeah they do. She's great, but she snitches on me.

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Speaker 1: It's announcement day, Froggy, what's your announcement? Ah? My announcement

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Speaker 1: is so many people for some reason had been wanting

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Speaker 1: to see like the gory details of my brain surgery

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Speaker 1: because we had said that there were pictures from like

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Speaker 1: an hour after the surgery where I still had like

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Speaker 1: the ports hanging out of my head from the dreams

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Speaker 1: and all that stuff, like, Okay, you want to see him, fine,

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Speaker 1: So I post them today and people are loving it.

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Speaker 1: They think it's like so cool. I'm like, I don't

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Speaker 1: know that. I think it was cool. It doesn't bother

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Speaker 1: me because it's mine. But if you want to see them,

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Speaker 1: it literally is like drainage ports hanging out of my noggin. Uh,

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Speaker 1: it's it's cool. It's cool that you shared it with people. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: I want you to see that if this type of

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Speaker 1: thing happens, it's rough at first, but you can make

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Speaker 1: it through. It's also so important, like what a testament

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Speaker 1: to science. Look what they were able to do to

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Speaker 1: your head, and that was just an hour after they

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Speaker 1: went in there, took a piece out and fixed you. Like,

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Speaker 1: that's crazy. I think it's awesome. Modern medicine is amazing. Scotty,

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Speaker 1: do you have an announcement from the serial library? I'm

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Speaker 1: dizzy I could tell you that. My announcement is both

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Speaker 1: of my children are COVID free sick. They're both sick,

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Speaker 1: and Nate's like, oh, I need to stay away from

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Speaker 1: you now, like we do scary, you know, because their

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Speaker 1: noses are running and they're they're they're not feeling well.

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Speaker 1: So we had them both tested last night and both

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Speaker 1: of them are negative. Very nice. I still don't want

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Speaker 1: to get sick. I don't care if they don't have COVID.

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Speaker 1: I don't want to get cold out here dragging these

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Speaker 1: germs in here. You're worse than COVID Jones. Now, hey, Brody,

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Speaker 1: what's your announcement today? Well, I've got to, but I'll

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Speaker 1: give you a short one. My Twitter account is not

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Speaker 1: for you to ask me leading political questions and then

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Speaker 1: yell at me when you don't like my answer. So

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Speaker 1: you know what, I can't agree with you more. Don't

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Speaker 1: ask questions if you don't want to know the answer, right,

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Speaker 1: don't send me like what do you think of this?

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Speaker 1: And then when I tell you, yell at me because

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Speaker 1: you don't agree with me. Don't ask me. My Twitter

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Speaker 1: is for jokes, Brody. We've been around long enough. We

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Speaker 1: you know when someone's baiting you for a conversation, don't

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Speaker 1: even answer because you know what they're trying to do.

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Speaker 1: They're trying to be a fucking asshole. Just don't let

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Speaker 1: them bring you down. That's right, you're being a fucking

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Speaker 1: asshole by doing that. Yeah, on a lighter note, scary

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Speaker 1: and I always record the Come Boys podcast on Thursdays,

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Speaker 1: but yesterday he begged me to do it last night

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Speaker 1: because he had plans today. So I made the mistake

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Speaker 1: of telling my wife that I didn't have to record today,

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Speaker 1: and I got a honeydee list. So now I've got

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Speaker 1: to run errands at four stores, go shopping, pick things up.

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Speaker 1: So lesson learned. When you get like a break in

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Speaker 1: your action, don't tell anybody, so you get to keep

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Speaker 1: that time to yourself. Very good, Right, I want to

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Speaker 1: get the scariest COVID plans. What's he doing? Let them

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Speaker 1: assume that your business. What is he doing that he

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Speaker 1: couldn't do the show today. Uh, podcast, let's go to

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Speaker 1: your announcement. Scary, come back to me. Why I'm still

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Speaker 1: I'm still formulating one. What are your plans today where

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Speaker 1: you couldn't do the podcast today? Oh? I have another podcast,

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Speaker 1: my other podcast, Speaking Volumes that I do with my

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Speaker 1: friends Share, which is a now a video podcast. So

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Speaker 1: it's more important that I also have to do. I

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Speaker 1: have to do some media training, which is why could

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Speaker 1: not record the Brooklyn Boys. You do need media training.

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Speaker 1: We all do, actually, And for those that don't know

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Speaker 1: what media training is, it's it's something where you get,

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Speaker 1: you know, you kind of are told. You know, you've

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Speaker 1: given guardrails and ways to answer questions. So you need

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Speaker 1: it really really badly trained. Yes, many times of course. Okay,

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Speaker 1: if that's why I'm as slick as slick and being Danielle,

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Speaker 1: what's your announcements? Still? Living at home with your children,

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Speaker 1: you get instant gratification, like if something happens, especially exciting

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Speaker 1: at school. So every now and then you'll see me

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Speaker 1: go like this with my headphone because one of them

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Speaker 1: is run downstairs to tell me something and they go

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Speaker 1: meaning take your head off, pressed and runs down the stairs.

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Speaker 1: I got a hundred three out of that test. And

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Speaker 1: then he turns around and runs back upstairs. So I

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Speaker 1: love that I'm home and I get this instant gratification.

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Speaker 1: They get so excited to share things with me, and

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Speaker 1: it's so cute and I love it and not temperature.

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Speaker 1: No Heid, Go ahead, Garrett, what I'm sorry? Was it

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Speaker 1: a ten point extra point like extra credit questions? Three

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Speaker 1: points was the extra credit question? So we'll go to you, Garrett.

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Speaker 1: What's your announcement? Well, I have banned a song from

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Speaker 1: my house and it's only been played two days in

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Speaker 1: a row. Um My, my children have found out that

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Speaker 1: Rebecca Black exists, and to hear Friday once is nice,

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Speaker 1: but they like to hear it about ten times. So

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Speaker 1: right before I come on every morning, it's can we

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Speaker 1: hear the Friday song? Because they sing it in school?

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Speaker 1: So yes, I am. I'm I am banning a song

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Speaker 1: from my house. It is no longer allowed to be

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Speaker 1: played under my roof. No more Rebecca Black. So I

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Speaker 1: mean you've pulled the I'm the Father. It's the first

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Speaker 1: time I really did it, and I was like, oh

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Speaker 1: my god, I'm turning it into my parents. It's good

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Speaker 1: to you banning music. It's Rebecca Black you list. Hey, man,

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Speaker 1: I'm moving to his house. Hey, I'm saving Gandhi for

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Speaker 1: last because I know she's a special one. On the way,

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Speaker 1: So straight, Nate, what's your big announcement today, I'm cutting

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Speaker 1: my hair. Okay, I get the vaccine. You're gonna look

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Speaker 1: like Dan from Dan and Shafe. I mean maybe like longer. Listen.

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Speaker 1: I was having the conversation with haw the last night.

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Speaker 1: She goes, are you a higher risk because all your

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Speaker 1: crap I got. I don't think so, And I think

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Speaker 1: there's people that probably need it more than me. But

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Speaker 1: when I do get it, I'm just gonna I can't

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Speaker 1: deal with this. Like every morning I gotta put on

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Speaker 1: this thing to cover you know. It's just like it's

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Speaker 1: such a production, and I know this is such a

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Speaker 1: high class problem for people, you guys that are losing

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Speaker 1: their hair, and I'm just like, I can't deal with

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Speaker 1: all this hair. I'm sorry, m keep it, but not

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Speaker 1: to the vaccine, so it could be a little while.

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Speaker 1: I got later. What what what don't you like at Scotty?

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Speaker 1: I don't know, you just look like a weirdo has

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Speaker 1: such a conservative view on what people should look like.

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Speaker 1: I think I told you the first time you met

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Speaker 1: my boyfriend, he was like, too many tattoos. He probably

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Speaker 1: smells bad by the way. I feel like I get less,

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Speaker 1: not attention, but I just don't feel like I get

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Speaker 1: as good a customer service with this thing. Really. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: you know, you walk around with a man, Butty, your

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Speaker 1: hair's all messy like this late in the day. People

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Speaker 1: do take me serious. They perceive you differently than who

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Speaker 1: you were before the man, But but you're still the

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Speaker 1: same asshole you were back there. In fact, Heather goes, hey,

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Speaker 1: you know, when we go out, could you do your hair?

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Speaker 1: I'm like, and I know, granted I looked like this

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Speaker 1: that day, but I was like, you look like Uncle Johnny.

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Speaker 1: You look like Larry from the Three Stooges. Still me,

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Speaker 1: it's just my hair is different. It's probably less maintenance though.

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Speaker 1: For you. God, I just I want to get out

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Speaker 1: of the shower in the morning. Is I love it?

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Speaker 1: I love your hair, But you do what you want

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Speaker 1: to do? You do you Nate? Uh? And finally, Gandhi,

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Speaker 1: what special announcement do you have today? Well, I don't

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Speaker 1: know how special it is, but for me, it was

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Speaker 1: special today. For the first time ever, my sister called

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Speaker 1: me during the show to address the topic that we

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Speaker 1: were talking about. Oh really, she hotlined you. She hotlined me,

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Speaker 1: and it gave me a heart attack because she knows

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Speaker 1: not to call during these four hours. So I saw

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Speaker 1: her calling, I was like, damn, answered the phone and

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Speaker 1: walked away. She was appalled at Nate shaving his pubes

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Speaker 1: in his backyard were She was like, well, she said,

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Speaker 1: why don't you do it over a toilet? There are

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Speaker 1: so many solutions in your house to get rid of

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Speaker 1: your pubists, and you go back into your backyard and

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Speaker 1: you shave it out there. She was like, you need

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Speaker 1: to tell him to stop that. It's insane. I was like,

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Speaker 1: what you called for this? All right? I'm gonna the

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Speaker 1: toilet thing. I've tried it. I've tried straddling the toilet.

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Speaker 1: It gets on the rim. There's inevitably that one or

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Speaker 1: two little pieces that eye off into the corner. I

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Speaker 1: don't want pubes on my floor. Anyone else. Have the

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Speaker 1: visual of Nate with junk handing over the bull, shake

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Speaker 1: it away, now, pege on the ground, pigs on the ground,

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Speaker 1: but a fool hold it out but the kitty pels good.

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Speaker 1: Just don't do it with kiddies in the pool. That's that, Garrett.

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Speaker 1: Where were you saying? Well, just the other day said

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Speaker 1: he wanted to go in his backyard and jump in leaves.

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Speaker 1: So hopefully you jumped in the leaves before you shaved.

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Speaker 1: You know what. This is a year round thing. During

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Speaker 1: the uh let's say winter, when there are no leaves,

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Speaker 1: you can just jump into a pile of pubic hair.

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Speaker 1: I think Nate is onto something here. I kind of

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Speaker 1: want to come over and borrow your backyard because I

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Speaker 1: don't have a good place. If you want to do

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Speaker 1: it outside, the best place to do it is to

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Speaker 1: find a cornfield. I did that one time when I

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Speaker 1: lived in Iowa because nobody can see you. Nobody can

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Speaker 1: see you. I'm not an exhibitionist. When you shuck corn,

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Speaker 1: it already has hair on it. I don't want service

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Speaker 1: you can offer to people for your backyard. I did

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Speaker 1: think about that because there's a vacant lot next door,

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Speaker 1: and I'm like, I'll just go in the vacant lot

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Speaker 1: because it's very brushy and very thick in there. And

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Speaker 1: then I was thinking, like, okay, what if I get

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Speaker 1: ticks or sense. Yeah, so I just did it in

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Speaker 1: my backyard. Hey, if you if you open up your

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Speaker 1: own business, you can call it Pubes be Gone. And

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Speaker 1: then if somebody wants to pay me five ten dollars

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Speaker 1: to come in my backyard and shave their pubes, I'll

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Speaker 1: supply them a razor. The neighborhood's gonna love that. So

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Speaker 1: how much time do we have frog? One minute? Okay,

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Speaker 1: So I love the fact that we made our announcements today.

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Speaker 1: I think that's good. You know, everyone has an announcement

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Speaker 1: and they sometimes just can't get to it because they're

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Speaker 1: too busy. No one's paying attention. Sometimes you gotta call

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Speaker 1: a friend and go, hey, how you doing great? Now

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Speaker 1: you feel like good? Listen, I need to make an announcement.

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Speaker 1: Even though it's just a one person. It gets their attention.

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Speaker 1: It lets them know that you have something that's very

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Speaker 1: important to you that you want to get across to them.

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Speaker 1: It's not idle chat, it's a I need your undivided attention,

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Speaker 1: and that's what the announcements about. Everyone should make announcements

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Speaker 1: every day. There you go, all right, I feel better

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Speaker 1: and I would like to come to your house. Elvius

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Speaker 1: to shave my pukes because there's no neighbors anywhere around.

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Speaker 1: Don't get near my house, don't get near my Froggy

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Speaker 1: has the best backyard for that though. By the way,

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Speaker 1: and this weekend I have a lake and alligators. They

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Speaker 1: don't want to see your pubs. Go show your pubs

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Speaker 1: on the alligators. All right, are we done? Alright? Well,

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Speaker 1: happy days are here again. Have a beautiful day. We'll

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Speaker 1: see you next week on The fifteen Minute Podcast Morning

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Speaker 1: Show