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Speaker 1: First Date follow Up powered by the Advocates Injury Attorneys

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Speaker 1: online at ADJUCUSLA dot com.

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Speaker 2: Lesha is on the phone today for a first date

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Speaker 2: follow up and she's getting ghosted by a guy named James.

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Speaker 2: So in a second, we're going to call him and

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Speaker 2: see if I'll tell us why he's a ghostinger and

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Speaker 2: maybe get her another date. But first, Lesia, how long

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Speaker 2: has it been since you heard from James.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, it's been about a week.

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Speaker 4: And then how many times have you reached out to

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Speaker 4: him in that time?

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Speaker 3: Yeah, like kind of a bunch.

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Speaker 5: I was, uh, you know, I was texting a bunch.

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Speaker 3: You know, we had a great connection and you know,

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Speaker 3: you know, I was we were trying to get together

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Speaker 3: and you know, I texted a few times and you know,

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Speaker 3: we had a plan. He canceled. We felt like he

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Speaker 3: needed the weekend to recover. I offered to make him soup,

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Speaker 3: which he declined, and I, you know, and then after that,

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Speaker 3: I texted him a couple of times. You know, he's

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Speaker 3: feeling and like nothing.

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Speaker 4: So did your date happen or this was after the date?

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Speaker 6: No?

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Speaker 3: Well, well we had a first date, okay, okay, but

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Speaker 3: then after that nothing.

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Speaker 6: Happened, Okay, Well, tell us about the date.

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Speaker 3: Well, we met Unhinge first of all, and like we

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Speaker 3: talked a little bit, and we wanted to go out

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Speaker 3: because we both like really.

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Speaker 5: Like food and travel and stuff.

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Speaker 3: And he's in a band and I used to sing

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Speaker 3: in a band, so we had like a lot of

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Speaker 3: great connections. And so we met for cocktails and we

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Speaker 3: like bounced around and got tacos and ended up at

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Speaker 3: this like karaoke place, which was really fun. After karaoke,

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Speaker 3: we went back to his place and we were hanging

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Speaker 3: out and like cuddling and stuff. But we didn't look up,

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Speaker 3: but there was like a lot of like affection myself.

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Speaker 3: And in the morning we kissed and like we planned

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Speaker 3: on seeing each other again like the next weekend. So

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Speaker 3: that was the date.

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Speaker 2: Is there anything that happened on the date that could

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Speaker 2: have been awkward or something that would cause him to

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Speaker 2: not want to talk to you again?

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Speaker 3: So I talked this over a bit, and I think

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Speaker 3: there might have been which I like won't apologize for,

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Speaker 3: and like I've been feeling bad about it. So like

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Speaker 3: when we were like hanging out and cuddling, he like

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Speaker 3: pulled down his phone to play me like a rough

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Speaker 3: edit of his band's new song, and I was excited

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Speaker 3: to hear it. I was glad he wanted to share

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Speaker 3: it with me, And you know, because I was on

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Speaker 3: the music background, I didn't feel like I knew to

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Speaker 3: hold back what I thought, you know, So I mean

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Speaker 3: I told him, I was like, I think this is

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Speaker 3: like a great idea for a song. I said, like

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Speaker 3: some of the lyrics were a little cheesy, and you know,

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Speaker 3: his voice was a little picky and certain points, and

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Speaker 3: like one of the lyrics in particular was like about

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Speaker 3: her love being like a sugar rush eating a box

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Speaker 3: of Krispy cream or something.

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Speaker 4: Okay, I like laughed at that, and.

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Speaker 3: Then I guess like asking him if I made him

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Speaker 3: feel like he was eating a box of Krispy cream.

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Speaker 3: And I thought I was being funny, like I was joking,

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Speaker 3: and like I.

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Speaker 5: Think I may have crushed him.

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Speaker 3: I don't know, maybe I took it too far.

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Speaker 5: So I feel like he's.

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Speaker 6: Apologize making fun.

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Speaker 3: Of Yeah, but I mean it sounds like.

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Speaker 4: You were being more playful. Yeah.

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Speaker 3: No, I was just saying, like that's how I felt,

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Speaker 3: like that's what.

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Speaker 5: The intention was.

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Speaker 1: Ju will you are doing music now? Too, So like,

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Speaker 1: think about this scenario. Wouldn't it be just kind of cute,

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Speaker 1: Like you're not are you going to be offended?

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Speaker 6: No, I wouldn't be.

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Speaker 2: I'm also a super harsh critic on myself, so I'd

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Speaker 2: be like, you're right, the whole thing is craft. I'll

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Speaker 2: throw it out, you're my call over it, I quit

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Speaker 2: it all. So I would just totally be like, yeah,

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Speaker 2: thanks for the honest feedback I saw.

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Speaker 1: That would also be a major turnoff problem. Also, Okay,

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Speaker 1: so maybe maybe he was a little but hurt. Maybe,

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Speaker 1: I mean.

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Speaker 3: It might be. So I feel like, I don't know.

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Speaker 3: I feel like we need to get him on the phone,

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Speaker 3: Like you need to get a third party and to

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Speaker 3: get him on the phone phone because he's just ghosting

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Speaker 3: me so like and I just want to apologize.

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Speaker 6: Well, we'll try to figure it out for you.

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Speaker 2: We'll play a song and we'll come back, and then

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Speaker 2: we'll call him and see if it tell us why

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Speaker 2: he's ghosting you and maybe get you another date with

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Speaker 2: Krispy Kreme Boy.

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Speaker 6: Okay, all right, should we not call him Krispy Creme Boy?

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Speaker 4: Disappear?

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Speaker 6: All right? Well, pleas I'll come back. Get your first

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Speaker 6: a follow up next.

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Speaker 2: Right in the middle of our first date follow up

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Speaker 2: if you're just joining us, Lesha is on the phone

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Speaker 2: and she's getting ghosted by a guy named James. So

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Speaker 2: we're about to call him and see if you'll tell

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Speaker 2: us why is ghostinger and maybe get her another date.

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Speaker 6: But first, Lisha, why don't you catch us up on

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Speaker 6: your situation?

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Speaker 3: Yeah, so, I when I a date with this guy James,

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Speaker 3: it like went really well. We had cocktailed and tacos,

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Speaker 3: and we had karaoke and all this stuff, and you know,

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Speaker 3: we bonded because he's in a band and I used

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Speaker 3: to sing in a band, and you know, we have

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Speaker 3: a lot of common interests. And I feel like and

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Speaker 3: he hasn't tested me back in a week, so and

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Speaker 3: I feel like something might have gone wrong the night

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Speaker 3: we were on the date. I feel like I might

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Speaker 3: have kind of heard his feelings making fun of one

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Speaker 3: of his lyrics which involves Christy, which I kept springing up. No,

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Speaker 3: I don't know. I feel like I might have.

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Speaker 5: Sent him and I need to apologize. And also he's

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Speaker 5: ghosting me.

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Speaker 3: So that's where we are, all.

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Speaker 6: Right, are you ready for us to call him?

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Speaker 5: Sure?

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Speaker 2: Okay, here we go Hello him, I speaking to James. Please, yeah,

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Speaker 2: speaking James.

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Speaker 6: How are you?

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Speaker 3: Man?

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Speaker 6: My name is Jubell. I'm calling from a radio show.

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Speaker 6: It's called the Jebel Show.

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Speaker 4: Hi, James. I'm Nina also on the show.

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Speaker 6: Hi, and I'm Victoria. How are you?

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Speaker 5: Oh?

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Speaker 7: Cool, wonderful. I'm doing good man, I'm getting ready calls

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Speaker 7: on radio?

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Speaker 5: But what's up?

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Speaker 6: Have you ever listened to the show before?

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Speaker 7: Yeah?

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Speaker 6: Yeah, okay, thank you? Yeah. Have you ever heard of

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Speaker 6: first date follow up before?

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Speaker 5: Oh? Yeah, yeah I have? This? Is this one of

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Speaker 5: these things?

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Speaker 6: First day follow up?

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Speaker 2: You know that's a segment where if you're ghosting somebody,

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Speaker 2: they can email us and then ask us to call

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Speaker 2: you and ask why you're ghosting them. Somebody tolled us

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Speaker 2: about you, James, Oh boy, any idea?

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Speaker 6: Who would be?

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Speaker 5: Yeah?

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Speaker 7: Maybe someone I met someone online, like a little more

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Speaker 7: than a week ago.

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Speaker 6: Is that someone's name? Lisha?

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Speaker 5: Yeah? Yeah, Lisha?

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Speaker 2: Oh yeah yeah. Well Lisia emailed us and told us

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Speaker 2: about your day. She said she really liked you, but

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Speaker 2: she's confused. Can you tell us why you're ghostinger?

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Speaker 7: I really liked her, but man, she's too much. She

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Speaker 7: texted me on Saturday, to ask about. Well, first of all,

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Speaker 7: I got sick, right, so, like I got sick a

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Speaker 7: little bit afterwards, but not the runa nothing, But like,

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Speaker 7: you know, she texted me on Saturday to ask me

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Speaker 7: about soup.

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Speaker 5: And then again to tell me good night, and.

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Speaker 7: Then text me a list of vitamins I should be taking.

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Speaker 4: Because you were sick.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, you know, it was like it was like.

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Speaker 7: A trip or a DoorDash GNC, you know, the whole

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Speaker 7: bag fall.

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Speaker 5: And then like not soon after asking if I missed her.

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Speaker 7: This this whole thing about like if I wanted Krispy Kremes,

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Speaker 7: Like asking if I wanted Krispy Kreme.

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Speaker 5: It's a it's a joke about some stupid lyric.

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Speaker 7: I made, and and and I mean just more text

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Speaker 7: on and on and on.

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Speaker 5: I'm not even giving you all.

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Speaker 4: That was one day. That happened all on the same day.

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Speaker 7: Yeah, and this is someone I had just talked to online.

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Speaker 5: They came over, we cuddled, I mean, the sweet it

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Speaker 5: was great, you know, don't get me wrong.

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Speaker 7: But after all this just piling on and just happening

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Speaker 7: so soon I just stopped responding because like I needed

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Speaker 7: to rest and I wake up, and it was like,

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Speaker 7: I mean, I lose like twelve text messages from her.

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Speaker 5: I don't respond, but I get even more the next day.

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Speaker 7: Eventually, I just I just block her because I feel

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Speaker 7: like that kind of energy I felt it gives me

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Speaker 7: a lot of anxiety, like and I'm gonna go with

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Speaker 7: the flow kind of. And when I just kissed raw Raw,

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Speaker 7: it's like, first off, it doesn't know, we feel better,

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Speaker 7: but then it's like this is someone I just met.

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Speaker 7: Sweet girl. I mean, she came over, it was great,

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Speaker 7: the day was amazing, Karaoke was fun, and yeah, like

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Speaker 7: we talked that it was going to turn into something.

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Speaker 7: But then the text, just the messaging, well it was

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Speaker 7: just nah, nah, it was just a note going.

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Speaker 1: I mean, it sounds like she was just concerned because

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Speaker 1: you were sick. Now, granted, twelve and maybe twenty four

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Speaker 1: text messages might be a lot in two days, but

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Speaker 1: the initial reached out probably was kind of nice.

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Speaker 4: Though.

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Speaker 7: No, I mean, I get it, she's very sweet, but

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Speaker 7: is this someone I just started talking to online and

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Speaker 7: it just started giving me the vibe that this is

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Speaker 7: the kind of person that's going to give me a.

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Speaker 5: Whole lot of anxiety. I don't okay, I just wanted peace.

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Speaker 2: Okay, Well, speaking of peace, James, I will let you

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Speaker 2: know that Lisa's actually on the phone listing and wants

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Speaker 2: to talk to you.

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Speaker 3: H oh hih Arisha do a problem getting close to people.

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Speaker 3: But do you know how to ask when someone cares

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Speaker 3: about you? Like I was just trying to show you

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Speaker 3: that I cared and I'm like actually a good caretaker

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Speaker 3: in like times like this.

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Speaker 7: I get it, but it's just we just had one

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Speaker 7: date after a little bit of online conversation, and I

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Speaker 7: just feel, well, you're sweet, wonderful, but I just feel

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Speaker 7: that we're nowhere close to the come over and make

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Speaker 7: me soup stage of this relationship.

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Speaker 3: Okay, Well, you said on your hind that you wanted

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Speaker 3: to be intentional about the time we spend together and

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Speaker 3: to prioritize the growth, and I feel like I was

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Speaker 3: doing that. So I don't know what there is about

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Speaker 3: this that you don't you wouldn't like, can.

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Speaker 7: We go further than or can we have a relationship first?

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Speaker 7: Can we like have some other there's there's steps to.

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Speaker 3: This before Okay, wait wait, I'm not ready to in

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Speaker 3: a relationship with you.

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Speaker 7: Oh look, that's that's that's not what I said. Okay,

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Speaker 7: that's that's not what I said. It's I feel there's

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Speaker 7: a little miscommunication here.

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Speaker 3: Well, I mean I'm not well, you just mentioned wanting

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Speaker 3: to have a relationship first, Like you talk about me

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Speaker 3: texting a lot, and you're already talking about a relationship.

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Speaker 3: So I don't know what the problem is with my

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Speaker 3: texting when you're like, I want a relationship right now? What.

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Speaker 5: No, I'm not I'm not saying right now.

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Speaker 7: It's just that I just don't want to jump into

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Speaker 7: things that just lead to anxiety. And just like already

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Speaker 7: we're checking each other's mental health. Like I'm just trying

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Speaker 7: to just go go with the vibe that we had

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Speaker 7: that was that was real good. It just felt like

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Speaker 7: this was this was just in a different place, and

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Speaker 7: I was just like I don't want to grow with this.

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Speaker 3: You are living way too fast, James.

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Speaker 7: Look, I just I just I'm I'm all for like

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Speaker 7: all those texts in the soup, but I just feel

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Speaker 7: that there's there's just a sequence to it that just

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Speaker 7: you know, rocks my boat a certain way. And like

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Speaker 7: I'm sorry for for miscommunicating or or like you know,

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Speaker 7: just going outside the vibe that we had, and I

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Speaker 7: just feel I just feel like we want the wrong

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Speaker 7: direction with that.

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Speaker 2: Well, James, would you like another date with Lisa? We'll

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Speaker 2: pay for it, James, I just so.

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Speaker 3: You know, I will go on another date with you,

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Speaker 3: But I just want to let you know, like I'm

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Speaker 3: not gonna get together with you right now, just so

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Speaker 3: you know.

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Speaker 5: Yeah.

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Speaker 7: So, like I said, I'm not interested in rushing into

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Speaker 7: getting together right now. I'm sorry about the miscommunication, but

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Speaker 7: I'm willing to give this another go, just as long

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Speaker 7: as you don't mention the Krispy Kremes.

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Speaker 3: Okay, but we're not going to be like dating yet,

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Speaker 3: Like this is just a date date, not like a

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Speaker 3: dating date.

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Speaker 5: Look, don't worry, I'm not trying to wipe you up.

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Speaker 5: Yeah wait a minute, you want.

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Speaker 2: To wipe me up like that?

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Speaker 5: Hold on, why are we jumping to marriage?

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Speaker 2: I don't think James wants to marry you yet. I

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Speaker 2: think you guys should just go out one more day

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Speaker 2: and see how it goes.

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Speaker 6: Okay, Okay, yeah right. Jubles First Day.

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