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Speaker 1: Lisa Lambinelli is not a licensed therapist or life coach.

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Speaker 1: She is a meddling advice giving yanta and know it

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Speaker 1: all and her words come from her head, her heart,

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Speaker 1: and often out of her ass. This podcast should not

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Speaker 1: be misconstrued as therapy. I should be taking with a

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Speaker 1: huge strain of salt for entertainment purposes only.

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Speaker 2: These You need help, You're the problems.

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Speaker 3: Come on, come on, go leab, take a pill. I

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Speaker 3: think you're insane.

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Speaker 2: Do what I saved, dumb ass, listen to me.

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Speaker 4: You Hey, everybody, it's Lisa Lambinelli on Shrink This with

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Speaker 4: Lisa Lambinelli on iHeart Podcast. Listen on your iHeart Radio app.

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Speaker 4: Wherever you get your podcasts, send your letters a shrink

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Speaker 4: This show at gmail dot com, at shrinth This Show

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Speaker 4: at gmail dot com.

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Speaker 2: And we are here. We are queer. We take it

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Speaker 2: in the rear. The last two or one is not true.

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Speaker 4: Anyway.

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Speaker 2: We are back for another little tidbit to tide you

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Speaker 2: over from season one of shrinth This the season two,

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Speaker 2: which premierees in January. Every week we're taking one of

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Speaker 2: your questions that we've ignored per episode, and.

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Speaker 4: We are going to talk about it.

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Speaker 2: And possibly answer it, probably make fun of you, probably

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Speaker 2: not give you any useful advice, because that's the brand

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Speaker 2: here at shrink ficking me.

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Speaker 4: Today.

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Speaker 2: To help me do the heavy lifting is my good

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Speaker 2: friend and co professor emeritus at the Norwalk Conservatory of

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Speaker 2: or Fur and the Arts, Chris O'Neill. You can find Chris.

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Speaker 4: At the no at what Chris Show?

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Speaker 2: Chris, Oh short, mine, I think it is Chris. Are

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Speaker 2: you familiar with We are going to revisit a letter

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Speaker 2: that was written I think it was episode three. Episode

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Speaker 2: three was called new zip code, same old she which,

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Speaker 2: by the way, we put a little asterisk in the

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Speaker 2: eye and shit because I don't think iHeart enjoys the cursing.

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Speaker 2: Well fuck those cunts. So anyway, what we discussed was

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Speaker 2: the concept of geographic sobriety. Chris, are you familiar with

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Speaker 2: the concept of geographic sobriety?

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Speaker 4: If not, you know you're not.

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Speaker 5: I don't think so it's graphic sobriety, like I'm moving

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Speaker 5: here to get away from my problems.

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Speaker 2: And now it's correct and now, and you never do

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Speaker 2: because wherever you go there you are. So basically, if

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Speaker 2: you have like a crazy friend, you notice always is

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Speaker 2: moving and you're like, oh, you've had twelve different zip codes,

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Speaker 2: some in other countries.

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Speaker 4: What are you chasing?

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Speaker 2: They're probably just trying to outrun some bullshit they don't

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Speaker 2: want to face.

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Speaker 4: So we did a whole episode on that.

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Speaker 2: We we didn't even name names of all the people

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Speaker 2: I know who do this, including myself. So I have

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Speaker 2: since settled down in one place, and I said, I

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Speaker 2: know this is going to be the place that I'm

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Speaker 2: going to live for the rest of my life, because

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Speaker 2: why have you ever done this where you just try

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Speaker 2: to outrun your problems, like, oh, grass is always greener,

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Speaker 2: it's gonna be better over there.

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Speaker 5: I have a lot of friends that have done the

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Speaker 5: whole I'm going to LA now because there's opportunities out there.

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Speaker 5: And then they get out there and it's the same shit,

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Speaker 5: and they go, I gotta move back to New York.

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Speaker 5: And You're like, I think the problem lies within, sweetheart,

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Speaker 5: And I think that it's not the scenery as much

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Speaker 5: as it's it's you.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, And you know they say too, like they always

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Speaker 2: make an excuse, which I get because I've done this. Well,

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Speaker 2: just the neighborhood's nicer, Yeah, you know, it's sunnier. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: I don't want to see Spanish writing because it means

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Speaker 2: I'm in the ghetto.

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Speaker 4: Those are the racists. It's like, maybe you look.

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Speaker 2: Internally of why you don't like the Spanish writing. Maybe

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Speaker 2: look into why you need so much sunlight because you're

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Speaker 2: a dark and gloomy bitch.

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Speaker 4: Well that could be a start. Do a little dissecting.

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Speaker 2: Yes, and there's nothing wrong with moving to a better

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Speaker 2: climate if you have, say, I don't know, soriatic something.

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Speaker 2: I don't even know what that means, but it was

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Speaker 2: on a commercial for something.

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Speaker 4: Sorry after rhuematory roth.

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Speaker 2: Riders something, and you go, oh my god, my bones

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Speaker 2: literally will feel better in San Diego or in the

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Speaker 2: desert or Arizona.

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Speaker 4: I get it.

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Speaker 2: But come on, bitch, if you don't got sorriet againis

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Speaker 2: don't go.

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Speaker 4: I already have. I'm ahead of you all the way.

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Speaker 2: Also, people seem to do this when it comes to jobs.

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Speaker 2: I get that, we change jobs. I get that after

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Speaker 2: we have abused Celia for several years on this podcast,

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Speaker 2: she will move on due to our toxicity, but she

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Speaker 2: will have hung in there and worked on herself in

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Speaker 2: the meantime to have the self esteem to move on.

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Speaker 2: But if you just kind of make lateral moves all

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Speaker 2: the time, sometimes it doesn't get better. It's something about you.

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Speaker 2: So let us revisit one of the letters from that

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Speaker 2: episode and see where you and I stand.

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Speaker 4: Please read, mister Christopher, Dear Lisa.

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Speaker 5: I just started a new job for a corporate law

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Speaker 5: firm after leaving my last one because my boss treated

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Speaker 5: me like absolute shit to the point that I began therapy.

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Speaker 5: My new boss seems nice, but the trauma from my

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Speaker 5: last one has left a horrible stanch with me, and

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Speaker 5: reporting to someone now makes me so angry. Maybe I

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Speaker 5: can't have a boss anymore? Or should I just shut

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Speaker 5: the fuck up and do the job and trust off.

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Speaker 5: Feel better in a few months. Thanks Melissa, New York,

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Speaker 5: New York.

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Speaker 2: Oh Melissa, Oh Melissa, you cute little last Let me

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Speaker 2: tell you something about you.

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Speaker 4: You think I gotta go out there.

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Speaker 2: You're gonna be Christine Baranski and the good What is

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Speaker 2: a show? The Good Wife or the Good Life or

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Speaker 2: the Good Content?

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Speaker 4: Start your own law firm. That's hilarious.

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Speaker 2: You're a woman. Women should not work. They should be

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Speaker 2: in the home. They should sit there barefoot and pregnant. Chris,

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Speaker 2: that's how I like to picture my women.

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Speaker 4: How about you? You just hear the door shut, run out.

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Speaker 4: I'm not getting.

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Speaker 2: But it is really funny when people like so, I

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Speaker 2: guess I can't have a boss.

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Speaker 4: So I guess I can't have a boss.

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Speaker 5: I mean, we're in the age now where that seems

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Speaker 5: to be a thing. It's like, I'm gonna start a

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Speaker 5: foot channel and millions month.

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Speaker 2: By the way, I was on someone put my feet

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Speaker 2: on Wiki feet.

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Speaker 4: There's a Wiki feet. Oh wait to know that. I'm

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Speaker 4: skeeved my feet. I hate feet.

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Speaker 2: But my niece has a very large podcast called Then

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Speaker 2: That's why we drink. So she said, oh my god,

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Speaker 2: I'm on Wiki feet and I only got a four.

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Speaker 4: They from one to five zero Bible. Well, I hate

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Speaker 4: Let me look up. I bet I'm not on there.

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Speaker 2: When they had a zoom in on a foot from

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Speaker 2: the Wendy Williams Show one of my appearances, Stop bragging, Lisa,

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Speaker 2: you were on Wendy Williams more than once. Yes, I

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Speaker 2: was students. So they zoomed in then the old foot

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Speaker 2: ski I got a five. So my feet are nicer

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Speaker 2: than my niece's, which I find Actually they're not there.

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Speaker 4: I'll be a fully disclosed they're not.

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Speaker 2: But anyway, the foot thing, if you're ingenious enough to

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Speaker 2: think of that.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, but this bitch, what's her name? What's this clam?

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Speaker 2: Stay is Melissa? He went to law school. You wanted

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Speaker 2: to follow those stench of the money. You wanted to

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Speaker 2: follow that green, that that that that that that.

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Speaker 4: The evil devils tool of the dollar.

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Speaker 2: And now it's coming back to reap its leather revenge

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Speaker 2: up on you.

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Speaker 4: So we either go to school for something else.

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Speaker 2: Well, you can't be your own boss, get your dad

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Speaker 2: to buy you a law firm that you could star

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Speaker 2: and beat Christine Baranski, or you suck it up and

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Speaker 2: you decide every boss has a little bit suckiness in them.

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Speaker 2: I'm gonna have to learn how to get resilient in myself,

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Speaker 2: because what Celia's gonna leave here and she's gonna buy

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Speaker 2: somebody better than me. No, you have to figure out

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Speaker 2: how to be resilient through all the yelling and abuse

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Speaker 2: and learn how to handle it. And if it becomes

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Speaker 2: too toxic, you move on like she invariably will.

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Speaker 5: Ye.

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Speaker 4: Don't you think I'm right? I agree? You gotta be

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Speaker 4: resilient to a degree.

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Speaker 5: But I mean if it starts affecting your mental health,

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Speaker 5: then you can look from a.

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Speaker 6: Rage group with their mental health, my mental health. My day,

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Speaker 6: we didn't have mental element, did have stress balls. We

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Speaker 6: didn't have fidget spinners. We call the fidget spinner your

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Speaker 6: boss's hand on.

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Speaker 4: Your assid fidget and you'd spin missy.

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Speaker 2: So figure sh all this to say I'm jumping from

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Speaker 2: one job to another. Yes, in an extreme case, yes,

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Speaker 2: I would say. What you do is you see what

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Speaker 2: you can work on within yourself, see what your threshold is.

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Speaker 2: If it becomes too much, then you got to move on.

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Speaker 2: But I don't think you can jump straight to maybe

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Speaker 2: I can never have a boss again, because you ultimately

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Speaker 2: will have a boss. You'll have other partners in the

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Speaker 2: law firm you start, you'll have I don't know, shareholders,

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Speaker 2: and when your your company goes public, there's always gonna

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Speaker 2: be someone breathing down your neck. Look at I was

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Speaker 2: self employed as a comic. I still had to answer

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Speaker 2: to managers, agents, theaters. You don't just suddenly have license

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Speaker 2: to shut everybody else's opinion.

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Speaker 4: Out and be a total asshole. Even though I got

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Speaker 4: away with it.

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Speaker 5: And she's saying her new boss is actually nice, but

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Speaker 5: it's the boss from her past that's just.

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Speaker 4: Haunting, just haunting her.

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Speaker 2: It's like holding against a new husband what the first

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Speaker 2: shitty husband did.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, you gotta shed that stuff. You can't. You can't

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Speaker 4: take that baggage with you.

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Speaker 2: It's too no, because is this your first marriage, Chris,

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Speaker 2: this is my first?

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Speaker 4: Oh, so you don't give dud do you have like ex'es?

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Speaker 2: You compare your current wife too and go god, thank god,

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Speaker 2: she's so much better.

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Speaker 4: Uh yeah, yes, yes, yeah, so you you didn't keep

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Speaker 4: the stench of the old clams they dated.

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Speaker 5: That's kind of the healthy approach, I would think is

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Speaker 5: to kind of go ow, that didn't work out, And

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Speaker 5: I was also a piece of shit in this. You

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Speaker 5: got to move forward and fix that and started in

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Speaker 5: with this person. You can't, you can't bring the baggage.

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Speaker 2: Well, it's also taking some accountability of what you might

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Speaker 2: even if it's a small amount. What did you contribute

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Speaker 2: to the last thing? Did you say yes when you

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Speaker 2: meant no? Because a lot of the times you just

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Speaker 2: let it pile up and let it pile up, and

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Speaker 2: then there's the big snap and now you have the

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Speaker 2: stench in your nose. By the way, she's pretty fucking dramatic.

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Speaker 2: I can't even tell you I didn't use that word stench.

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Speaker 2: You know a friend of mine last night, we're at

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Speaker 2: the diner. He gets a text from his fiance. Well,

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Speaker 2: this clam is dramatic, and she's like, oh my god,

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Speaker 2: I just cut myself on a shard of glass.

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Speaker 4: Have you ever typed.

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Speaker 5: The word shard if I was bleeding, I wouldn't type

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Speaker 5: oh my god to fucking start the text.

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Speaker 2: They have a flair for the dramatic this age group,

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Speaker 2: because they're about the same age. So I think sometimes

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Speaker 2: like her word stench is a bit of an indicator

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Speaker 2: that she might be being a little much. So to

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Speaker 2: blow your nose, take the stench out of your fucking nostrils,

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Speaker 2: figure out what your problem is, learn to be resilient,

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Speaker 2: and you know what, maybe rich daddy'll buy you a

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Speaker 2: law firm. What do you think I think this is

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Speaker 2: a good plan.

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Speaker 4: I think so.

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Speaker 5: I mean, I like how she gave you the option

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Speaker 5: to just tell her to shut the fuck up and

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Speaker 5: do her job and trust that she'll feel better in

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Speaker 5: a few months.

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Speaker 4: I don't know how long she's been in this new

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Speaker 4: job for it sounds like it's pretty new. Yeah, because

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Speaker 4: like that's the thing.

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Speaker 2: You're not even opening yourself up to the new possibility

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Speaker 2: that it could be kind of nice here.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, this guy seems nice and could be even worse

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Speaker 5: than your last boss.

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Speaker 4: You never know, last is half empty.

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Speaker 2: You might be fidget spinning on his pole, as they

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Speaker 2: say in the corporate world. Hey, I had a stench

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Speaker 2: about podcasts and then I did this one and the

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Speaker 2: stench got worse. No, I no, I really did have

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Speaker 2: a stench because I had a deal with a podcast

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Speaker 2: company years ago. And again, they weren't bad, there was

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Speaker 2: nothing wrong with them, but they did have this thing

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Speaker 2: where if you didn't have a certain amount of downloads.

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Speaker 4: You gotta go.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, and I'm like, oh my god, I'm never doing

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Speaker 2: a podcast again.

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Speaker 4: Well I did, I like this one.

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Speaker 2: We don't have that rule here, thank god, because you know,

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Speaker 2: the three listeners we have aren't going to really size up.

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Speaker 2: So I said, you know what, if I'd have kept

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Speaker 2: the stench in my nostrils and cut myself on a

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Speaker 2: shard fucking clam.

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Speaker 4: I would have never been over here at all, right, iHeart,

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Speaker 4: And you would have never been able to listen to

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Speaker 4: me on the.

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Speaker 2: iHeart app or wherever you get heart fuck you get

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Speaker 2: your clammy shows.

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Speaker 4: Cleanse yourself, girl, give it a shot. It doesn't work. Yah,

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Speaker 4: Hang in there, I melissas podcasting. You know what, Honestly,

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Speaker 4: you feel like your own boss, but you're not. You

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Speaker 4: come in here.

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Speaker 2: You got a twenty two year old who's been in

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Speaker 2: therapy for fifty years telling you what to do.

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Speaker 4: Start speaking now. Your time's up.

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Speaker 2: Got the other one in the other room, head of podcasting.

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Speaker 2: He looks fourteen. Fucking fucking Jewfro looks like you fucked.

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Speaker 4: I shouldn't. I'm sixty four years old.

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Speaker 2: I'm answering to Jufro child out there trying to fix

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Speaker 2: my fucking machine so I could tape from home, so

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Speaker 2: I don't just slept my fucking twad into the city.

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Speaker 4: Everything's an illusion.

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Speaker 2: Everything is a compromise. We do what we do, usually

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Speaker 2: have to co host with brain dead Nick.

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Speaker 4: I mean this, poor Nick, poor Lisa I gotta put

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Speaker 4: up with.

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Speaker 2: In any case, we all make compromises. Melissa, figure your

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Speaker 2: part out in it and then you'll be fine. Right,

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Speaker 2: Just say right right and listen to us on the

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Speaker 2: iHeart app or wherever you get your podcasts, and mark

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Speaker 2: your calendars for some vague time in January when Season

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Speaker 2: two of Shrink This arrives and you get a full

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Speaker 2: hour of this magic