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Speaker 1: Hey, everyone, welcome back to Bachler Happy Hour.

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Speaker 2: I'm Joe and I'm Serena.

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Speaker 1: And we are here with Kylie Russell from last season

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Speaker 1: A Bachelor in Paradise and from Kylie, who is your

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Speaker 1: bachelor Zach?

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Speaker 3: Yeah, he's in twenty seven. I'm a Bacheler. What's Zach.

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Speaker 3: It's nice to let's see you guys again and be

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Speaker 3: back Bachelor Nation.

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Speaker 4: It's so funny because we had Tyler Cameron a few

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Speaker 4: weeks ago and we're like, oh, like, you've never been

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Speaker 4: on the podcast, so crazy, and then this week I

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Speaker 4: was like, I think Kylie's been on like three times,

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Speaker 4: like she's like a regular here.

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Speaker 3: This is my third time and I love this space.

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Speaker 3: I always feel so welcomed and very energetic platforms beyond,

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Speaker 3: so I'm excited to be back.

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Speaker 2: We love having y'all.

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Speaker 1: When I hear your name, I think of one thing

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Speaker 1: and you said it up. You said it on our podcast,

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Speaker 1: and that's what I This is how I associate you. Now.

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Speaker 2: Do you know what they are on Happy Hour?

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Speaker 1: I think you said it on Clickbait already. It's if

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Speaker 1: you do. It's something that you do that I.

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Speaker 3: Drink Mountain do And yes, I really got off that

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Speaker 3: podcast and I was like, why did you just word vomit?

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Speaker 3: Like are you good? Because although I do that, I

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Speaker 3: don't want the world to know. But I live in

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Speaker 3: California now and I feel like I have to be

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Speaker 3: like a healthy queen. I guess. So we've done out

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Speaker 3: back on that and do and we only drink that

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Speaker 3: ever so often.

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Speaker 4: Really instead of waking up and having a coffee, I'll

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Speaker 4: wake up and have a glass.

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Speaker 1: Keep a Mountain Dew at her nightstand and wake up.

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Speaker 4: The first thing, you know what though, So that is

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Speaker 4: crazy Kylie like it is. But at the same time,

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Speaker 4: there's people that are like crazy, crazy diet coke drinkers,

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Speaker 4: and I feel like it's kind of similar. I mean,

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Speaker 4: Anna Redmond is like obsessed with mountain dew. Also, I

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Speaker 4: think they like sent her a bunch of I don't

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Speaker 4: feel so wone now there's a community of you guys

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Speaker 4: out there drinking Mountaindale.

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Speaker 3: Less embarrassed now. But yeah, like I said, I've tried

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Speaker 3: to kind of put my health at my forefront and

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Speaker 3: be a little bit better. But I think I will

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Speaker 3: if mountain dew is what kills me, at least I'll

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Speaker 3: die happy. I guess you.

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Speaker 4: Know what everyone has like their thing, you know, like

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Speaker 4: Joe loves Pinkberry and.

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Speaker 1: Like, okay, I actually don't. I'm actually I'm over Pinkberry.

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Speaker 5: Is no longer ordering Pinkberry every night after But if

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Speaker 5: I were, if I were to do a pop, if

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Speaker 5: I were to drink a pop, my go to is

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Speaker 5: a coke.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, I love a good king. It's a toss up

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Speaker 3: Coke Coker Mountain dew for me. But mon deu is there?

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Speaker 3: My heart lives.

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Speaker 2: Do you drink coffee?

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Speaker 3: No? And I'm a nurse, so I work long, twelve

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Speaker 3: hour shifts and not being a coffee drinker will be

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Speaker 3: the death of me, just because I'm so physically tired

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Speaker 3: all the time. And it would be so nice to

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Speaker 3: have like that espresso boost. But it's just my tastebuds

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Speaker 3: are really picky. I'm twenty six, and I have the

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Speaker 3: tastebuds of like like a six year old child. So

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Speaker 3: I'm hoping one day I'll wake up and they'll be

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Speaker 3: like evolved, but unfortunately does not yet happen, So no

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Speaker 3: coffee for me. I want to like Starbucks. I want

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Speaker 3: to walk in with like my cute scrubs and my latte.

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Speaker 3: But it just will never be me unfortunately.

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Speaker 2: That's all right, that's so funny to me. I like,

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Speaker 2: so you're like a chicken fingers and fries girl.

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Speaker 3: Oh, absolutely, yeah, I think too. That's why when you

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Speaker 3: were traveling for Zach season at the Bachelor, one of

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Speaker 3: the things put being on TV and like the emotions

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Speaker 3: of like falling in love aside, Like, one of my

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Speaker 3: biggest struggles was finding things on the menu in the

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Speaker 3: different countries that I liked. It was a struggle and

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Speaker 3: probably a red flag. But if they don't have chicken

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Speaker 3: fingers and fries, like I don't want it.

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Speaker 1: What's the most adventurous food you've you've dabbled in?

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Speaker 3: Okay, so I my junior year of college, I went

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Speaker 3: to Spain for two weeks and Spanish food is very interesting.

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Speaker 3: I thought. So in the South, we love a good

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Speaker 3: hush puppy, and for whatever reason, I thought I was

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Speaker 3: eating a hush puppy in Spain. It definitely wasn't a hushpuppiy.

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Speaker 3: It was. I'd bit into it. It looked just like

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Speaker 3: one and cuet. Yeah, probably, and it was not. I

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Speaker 3: was very surprised that it was not what I was expecting,

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Speaker 3: so I think that I think the Spanish food in

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Speaker 3: Spain really was out there for me. I ended up

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Speaker 3: finding an American diner in like the pit of Barcelona,

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Speaker 3: and I ate there like every other day, just because

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Speaker 3: I want to be so cultured, like I really do.

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Speaker 3: But my taste bluds just hate me basically.

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Speaker 4: But you know what, like, if you're trying things, that's

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Speaker 4: all you can do. You know what I mean exactly,

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Speaker 4: you don't like them, you don't like them. I feel

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Speaker 4: like it's just out of your control, like what foods

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Speaker 4: taste good to and what don't.

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Speaker 3: Thank you, Serene, thank you for having me b And

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Speaker 3: it's like you said, it's not like lack of effort.

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Speaker 3: I always put my best friend forward. It's just my

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Speaker 3: body rejects me. So they know I'm always advocate.

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Speaker 4: I feel like I used to be judgmental of picky eaters,

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Speaker 4: but then I'm like, when you think about it, it's like,

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Speaker 4: if you're not willing to try different foods, like that

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Speaker 4: is an issue. I think I think you should always

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Speaker 4: be open to, like trying different cultures foods, but if

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Speaker 4: you're trying them and they don't taste good to you,

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Speaker 4: Like you can't do anything about that, like if you

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Speaker 4: don't like them. Oh, I'm just a girl, yeah, like

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Speaker 4: the just who wants chicken fingers.

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Speaker 1: I have a friend that I was just in Forida

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Speaker 1: with and he he will only eat like a cheeseburger

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Speaker 1: well done with catchup and like cheetos and like that's

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Speaker 1: all he'll eat. But we have to pivot.

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Speaker 4: So you you're from Charlotte, yes, and you are living

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Speaker 4: wear in California.

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Speaker 2: No, you're in San Diego right.

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Speaker 3: Yes, I'm one of the basic Bachelor nations and that

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Speaker 3: moved to California, San Diego specifically after being on a season.

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Speaker 3: I'm actually in my apartment with I love with Jess

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Speaker 3: Gerard from my season of Paradise a ZAC season. She's

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Speaker 3: in the room beside me. She's a work from homegirly.

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Speaker 3: So my god, Hi Jack, Yeah, hey Jess, if you

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Speaker 3: can hear us. But yeah, no, I have loved it.

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Speaker 3: I've been here. I moved here in mid February, so

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Speaker 3: it's almost been two months, which is insane how fast

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Speaker 3: time it's grown. It's taken some adjustment because it's so

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Speaker 3: much different than the East Coast. But I really do

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Speaker 3: love it.

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Speaker 4: What do you think it is that pulls so many

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Speaker 4: people from Bachelor Nation to go live in San Diego?

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Speaker 2: Like, was it on your radar before?

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Speaker 4: Was it just like all of your friends were moving there,

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Speaker 4: you thought it would be fine? Like it's the whole

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Speaker 4: San Diego Bachelor Nation thing is so interesting to me

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Speaker 4: because there's literally so many of them there.

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Speaker 3: Yeah. So I honestly, for myself, if you would have

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Speaker 3: told me prior to going on The Bachelor that I

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Speaker 3: would ever move out of Charlotte, I would be like,

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Speaker 3: you're insane. There's no way. I went to college there.

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Speaker 3: I loved ten minutes from my parents after being out

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Speaker 3: of my parents' house, Like, Charlotte was my home, it

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Speaker 3: was my community, and I loved it there. And so

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Speaker 3: I think The Bachelor and especially Paradise provided so much

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Speaker 3: growth for me and allowed me to really become independent.

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Speaker 3: And then so that kind of sparked my interest of

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Speaker 3: wanting to get out of Charlotte and explore and experience

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Speaker 3: new cities. And then everyone for my season, I know,

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Speaker 3: Kat lives here now, Genevieve Mayo and then Anastasia and

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Speaker 3: they kind of just picked up and came here and

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Speaker 3: so Jess and I were like, why not us? So

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Speaker 3: I think it was just it was never specifically San Diego.

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Speaker 3: For me, it was I want to experience a new city,

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Speaker 3: and all my friends just so happened to go to

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Speaker 3: San Diego. So that's why I chose it.

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Speaker 4: That makes sense because it's like it's an easy adventure,

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Speaker 4: but it also feels safe probably to be like, I

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Speaker 4: want to try something new, but I don't want to

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Speaker 4: be like isolated and alone.

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Speaker 2: And you know that you're going to have kind of

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Speaker 2: a beautiful too.

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Speaker 3: Yeah. I mean it's not a hard place to live

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Speaker 3: at all. And exactly like you're saying, Serene, I did

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Speaker 3: become very independent on the Bachelor, but I don't think

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Speaker 3: power to the people who can pick up a move

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Speaker 3: and know no one. But unfortunately that's just not something

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Speaker 3: I probably would ever be comfortable with. So it's that

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Speaker 3: comfort blanket of having my friends here while exploring a

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Speaker 3: beautiful inner city. You guys should come and visit.

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Speaker 2: I've actually never been to San Diego.

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Speaker 1: I knew that.

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Speaker 4: I think you've been twice, Yeah, twice.

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Speaker 2: I think I would love to go.

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Speaker 4: It's just like we live in New York and it's

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Speaker 4: like a bit of a mission to get out there.

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Speaker 3: No, it's far. It's like a six hour flight from

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Speaker 3: North Carolina, so I feel like it may be a

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Speaker 3: little further for good. I'm very geographically challenged, so I'm

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Speaker 3: not exactly sure. But New York was actually on the list.

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Speaker 3: I know Davia and we are both live in New York,

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Speaker 3: and so I was like pulled in either that action

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Speaker 3: or San Diego. But I hate the cold, and unfortunately,

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Speaker 3: you guys' winters are brutal, so I'm going to stay

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Speaker 3: over here where I can go to the beach.

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Speaker 1: Basically, So what is what is a regular weekend for

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Speaker 1: you guys? Are you all getting together all the time?

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Speaker 1: What's that looking like?

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Speaker 3: Yeah? So I think because we have the comfort of

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Speaker 3: each other, we find ourselves migrating to one another. We

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Speaker 3: like to experience any new restaurants. We like to go

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Speaker 3: to the local bars. There's two separate kind of like

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Speaker 3: fields of San Diego. You have Pacific Beach, which is

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Speaker 3: like your beachy bars, kind of gives like a college vibe.

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Speaker 3: And I swear Jessica is obsessed with peb like she'd

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Speaker 3: probably be buried there as she could, so she often

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Speaker 3: drags us to PB or there's like the little Italy area.

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Speaker 3: I would say it's like similar to New York vibes,

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Speaker 3: kind of like your older men women kind of just

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Speaker 3: like by very low key and subtle. So I guess

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Speaker 3: it just depends on how we wake up that Saturday

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Speaker 3: and what we're feeling. But if it's up to Jess,

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Speaker 3: peb is where it will be.

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Speaker 4: Where it is at And then during the week, what

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Speaker 4: is your life like?

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Speaker 2: You were an urn right, yes, in Charlotte?

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Speaker 3: Okay, I was. Yeah, I was honestly really weird because

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Speaker 3: I had been talking about moving since like September of

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Speaker 3: last year, and I worked in postpartum, so right after

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Speaker 3: a mom and baby delivers and labor delivery, they come

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Speaker 3: to my unit and I take care of them for

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Speaker 3: the next couple of days. And it's a very specialized field,

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Speaker 3: and once you're there, no one really wants to leave

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Speaker 3: because it's an amazing place to work. Long story short,

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Speaker 3: I could not find a gig anywhere in San Diego.

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Speaker 3: It was almost impossible, and so I'd kind of just

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Speaker 3: given up. I was going to work at a med

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Speaker 3: spa here already like accepted the offer, was ready to go.

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Speaker 3: And then the day I moved out, I found a position.

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Speaker 3: Day I moved out of Charlotte, I found a postpartum

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Speaker 3: position at a hospital here, and I like interviewed on

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Speaker 3: a whim. Literally within an hour later, I had an

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Speaker 3: offer letter, and then two hours later I was on

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Speaker 3: a plane to San Diego. So it was like everything

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Speaker 3: had just fallen into place. I was so like genuinely

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Speaker 3: excited about my work and when I was coming to so, yeah,

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Speaker 3: I'm a post part of Meiers here in San Diego.

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Speaker 2: Oh my god, that's amazing.

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Speaker 4: It mustage just felt like truly the stars were aligning

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Speaker 4: for you.

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Speaker 3: Literally, because I think I was obviously excited about moving,

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Speaker 3: but my job was kind of holding back that excitement

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Speaker 3: because it just it wasn't where I felt like I

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Speaker 3: was drawn to. And so that aligning literally was like, Okay,

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Speaker 3: I'm supposed to be going here. I'm supposed to be here,

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Speaker 3: and it's going to be a good experience.

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Speaker 1: Nice. What what are you? What are your what are

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Speaker 1: your shifts? Like? What shifts do you work?

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Speaker 3: I am a unicorn and I was able to get

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Speaker 3: not only a new job, but I was able to

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Speaker 3: get day shifts. So I work I go in about

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Speaker 3: and that's really rare, especially if you're starting out on

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Speaker 3: a new unit. You're typically always nights and then you

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Speaker 3: have to work through what your way up to days.

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Speaker 3: So I get into the hospital around like six forty

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Speaker 3: five in the morning and then I don't ever really

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Speaker 3: leave until about seven forty five at night. So it's

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Speaker 3: so long day once I'm there. But I only typically

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Speaker 3: work three to four days a week, so I have

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Speaker 3: some days of rest like today in between, so it

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Speaker 3: makes it, it makes it worth it nice.

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Speaker 1: That's uh, yeah, that's not bad. Then I never know

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Speaker 1: because like sometimes I hear like you'all hear like nurses

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Speaker 1: that work around the clock every day and then you

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Speaker 1: have like there's all different hours, so I was curious

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Speaker 1: about that.

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Speaker 3: I empowered to them. I can agree that I was

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Speaker 3: off of work for like two and a half months

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Speaker 3: and so my body was used to just being lazy,

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Speaker 3: and then I go into my first whole hour shifts

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Speaker 3: being back, and I felt like I had just died

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Speaker 3: and got back to life. So I'm slowly but surely adjusted.

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Speaker 3: But it's very hard on your body, but a really

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Speaker 3: rewarding job.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, I feel like that's such a special unit to

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Speaker 4: work in because you're kind of seeing people hopefully and

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Speaker 4: like their happiest time with their news.

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Speaker 2: Yeah yeah, but also like stressful because it's like if.

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Speaker 3: They're not getting any sleep, the babies wanting to feed

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Speaker 3: all night, the babies crying. No, it's literally so rewarding.

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Speaker 3: I feel like there's a lot of education that comes

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Speaker 3: into my job of just like helping especially a new

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Speaker 3: mom transition into motherhood. I will say, like ninety eight

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Speaker 3: percent of the time, like you said, it's one of

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Speaker 3: the happiest moments of their life. I do occasionally get

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Speaker 3: some baby daddy drama that's always kind of interesting to see.

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Speaker 3: But yes, yes, I like sometimes I like, am I

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Speaker 3: working on Jerry Springer? Or like, am I in the

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Speaker 3: hospital right now? But putting that aside, it's very refreshing

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Speaker 3: and something I love to do.

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Speaker 4: I could totally see you in that role. If I

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Speaker 4: ever have a baby, I'll be like, Kylie, what do

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Speaker 4: I do?

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Speaker 3: I'll fly out to New York and I'll do all

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Speaker 3: of the most part tricks I got you.

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Speaker 1: Thank you all right? So I want to get into

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Speaker 1: your dating life, but before we do, let me kind

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Speaker 1: of summarize for everyone what went down, Yes, with your

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Speaker 1: season of Paradise. So essentially, you're on Paradise, you and

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Speaker 1: Avon leave kind of like you wishy washy, but like

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Speaker 1: you're kind of in a you're you're somewhat of a couple.

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Speaker 1: Then after the show airs, you guys post that you're

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Speaker 1: together in San Diego, and then like twenty four hours later,

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Speaker 1: you post a story or you might have posted in

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Speaker 1: and feed that he cheated on you, and you guys

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Speaker 1: are broken up. And that's kind of the last of

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Speaker 1: what I know, and I think most of the viewers know.

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Speaker 1: I know you went and did file files, so I'm

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Speaker 1: sure you talked a little more on that, but yeah,

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Speaker 1: you want to catch us up.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, so that time period of my life was a whirlwind.

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Speaker 3: Just like you said, I left with Avon on the show.

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Speaker 3: It didn't really look like we were happy. We just

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Speaker 3: had some we had indifferences about kind of our ending

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Speaker 3: when it came to the show, but we still decided

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Speaker 3: to leave with each other as like boyfriend girlfriend. We

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Speaker 3: I think it was like a six month time period

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Speaker 3: in between filming and the very end of the show.

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Speaker 3: We were a strong couple, as strong as we could be.

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Speaker 3: Because we were doing long distance. I had not yet

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Speaker 3: moved to San Diego. I was still in Charlotte, he

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Speaker 3: was here, and then we would make it a point

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Speaker 3: to try to see each other at least once per month,

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Speaker 3: and we did a really good job with that. And

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Speaker 3: then unfortunately I did find out that news, and it

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Speaker 3: kind of felt like everything was just like stripped away

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Speaker 3: from me and I was having to start from scratch.

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Speaker 3: I haven't I'm not really seasoned when it comes to

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Speaker 3: being in relationships. Aside from Avan, I only had one

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Speaker 3: other boyfriend and that was six years ago. So obviously

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Speaker 3: I've talked to guys, I've dated around, but never really

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Speaker 3: been serious with anyone other than those two men, and

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Speaker 3: so I've never been cheated on before. This was the

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Speaker 3: first time. So having that happened to you was already

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Speaker 3: like a gut punch, but then having to deal with

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Speaker 3: it on such a public platform that was like, I

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Speaker 3: can't even put into words how devastating that was. And

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Speaker 3: then I felt like I had to answer to so

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Speaker 3: many people because in one breath I was posting that

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Speaker 3: you were together, and then we were happy, and everyone

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Speaker 3: was texting me congratulations, and then all of a sudden

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Speaker 3: I find this out and I'm like feeling I have

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Speaker 3: to lie to people saying thank you, and we're not

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Speaker 3: together anymore. So long story short, I am in a

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00:16:49,160 --> 00:16:54,400
Speaker 3: place where I've completely moved past the emotions of finding

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Speaker 3: something like that out. I'm trying to be I feel

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Speaker 3: like it was a sense, to be very honest with you,

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Speaker 3: It's kind of like I had the human emotion of

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Speaker 3: like feeling insecure about myself there for a little bit

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Speaker 3: because I'm like, well, if he chose to do this

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Speaker 3: to me, then there's obviously I'm not enough or there's

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Speaker 3: obviously something wrong with me, and I know that's not

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Speaker 3: the case whatsoever, But it was just that human emotion

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Speaker 3: of like, Okay, is there something I need to do better.

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Speaker 3: I have now since grown from that and realized that

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Speaker 3: that's not necessarily the case. It was just a character

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Speaker 3: flaw on his end. But it's really just putting the

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Speaker 3: pieces back together just because I did. We were in

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Speaker 3: such a strong place where at the end of it

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Speaker 3: that I thought that he was my future, in my

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Speaker 3: forever and being having that stripped away from me completely,

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Speaker 3: so suddenly I was like, Okay, I got to start over,

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Speaker 3: and I will say, I'm not gonna lie moving to

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Speaker 3: San Diego. He was a big part of that prior

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Speaker 3: to all of this happening. So I had to decide

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Speaker 3: one if I was going to continue to move, if

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Speaker 3: I was going to ever even be willing to speak

360
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Speaker 3: to him again, Like there were so many different things.

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Speaker 3: So that was like my life was a whirlwind in

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Speaker 3: December and January, and then I decided to move here

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Speaker 3: solely for myself. I wanted to prove to myself that

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Speaker 3: I am independent, that I can finally cut the umbilical

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Speaker 3: cord from my family and I can do big things

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Speaker 3: without them, And then I wanted to experience this with

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Speaker 3: my friends. I think right now, speaking on dating, I

368
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Speaker 3: am not in a position to be dating anyone. I

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Speaker 3: think that circumstance really just like took everything out of

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Speaker 3: me and I can't find it in me right now.

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Speaker 3: I know it will eventually come to give myself like

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Speaker 3: that to someone else again, So I think it's just

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Speaker 3: all about time and allowing myself to fully heal before

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Speaker 3: I jump back into something.

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Speaker 4: What was that feeling like then moving to San Diego? Obviously,

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Speaker 4: like you have your girls there, you have friends, but

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Speaker 4: like he lives there right right, So you know, I'm

378
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Speaker 4: now moving to the city where my ex I don't

379
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Speaker 4: know exactly like how you're referring to him label wise

380
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Speaker 4: at that time, but like my ex is living there,

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Speaker 4: and like, you know.

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Speaker 2: You have mutual friends in the city.

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Speaker 4: Like, was there anxiety had you talked to him like, Hey,

384
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Speaker 4: I'm coming into town, we might run into each other?

385
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Speaker 4: Like what was that dynamic like, and how are you

386
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Speaker 4: feeling about it?

387
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Speaker 3: So I was definitely very anxious. I would be lying

388
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Speaker 3: if I said that, even and I still were in

389
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Speaker 3: somewhat of communication, so he knew that I was moving.

390
00:19:37,840 --> 00:19:41,680
Speaker 3: I think he was very anxious too, just because obviously

391
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Speaker 3: he was in a like a place, in a space

392
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Speaker 3: where he wanted to get back together, but he wanted

393
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Speaker 3: to give me time to heal as well. As he's

394
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Speaker 3: been very mature in all of this. He's wanting to

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Speaker 3: heal and become a better person himself before he even

396
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Speaker 3: jumps back into anything, So he wanted I think we

397
00:19:57,760 --> 00:20:00,000
Speaker 3: were both scared because we wanted to allow each other

398
00:20:00,080 --> 00:20:05,520
Speaker 3: their space to grow separately before because you know, you're

399
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Speaker 3: in a new city, that comfortability of having someone that

400
00:20:09,359 --> 00:20:12,639
Speaker 3: you were once so close to can easily draw you

401
00:20:12,680 --> 00:20:15,639
Speaker 3: to them, but it wasn't. We didn't want it to

402
00:20:15,680 --> 00:20:18,840
Speaker 3: be a situation where we just like, because it was comfortable,

403
00:20:18,920 --> 00:20:22,000
Speaker 3: we just jumped back in. And that wasn't even something

404
00:20:22,000 --> 00:20:24,000
Speaker 3: that I was considering at the point, but knew it

405
00:20:24,000 --> 00:20:26,240
Speaker 3: could be a possibility because it would have been easy.

406
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Speaker 3: So I think I was definitely very anxious, but we

407
00:20:32,440 --> 00:20:35,560
Speaker 3: had grown conversations where we were like, we just need

408
00:20:35,560 --> 00:20:38,440
Speaker 3: to take this time apart and give each other space.

409
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Speaker 3: I don't I should, a normal human should, but I

410
00:20:44,359 --> 00:20:49,240
Speaker 3: don't harbor any like resentment towards Avan. I was very

411
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Speaker 3: angry with him, especially with what he had done, but

412
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Speaker 3: I just try. I know I can't continue to grow

413
00:20:56,160 --> 00:20:59,040
Speaker 3: and I can't move forward if I don't find it,

414
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Speaker 3: and need to hopefully one day fully forgive him because

415
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Speaker 3: it's just not allowing me to fully, fully move past

416
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Speaker 3: that and fully be a better version of myself. So

417
00:21:10,160 --> 00:21:13,000
Speaker 3: it's its not It's probably been one of the hardest

418
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Speaker 3: things I've ever had to navigate in my life, and

419
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Speaker 3: I'm just trying to do it grace as gracefully as

420
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Speaker 3: I can and as responsible as I can, and just

421
00:21:23,760 --> 00:21:25,560
Speaker 3: truly look out for myself because at the end of

422
00:21:25,600 --> 00:21:28,439
Speaker 3: the day, I think I need to put myself above

423
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Speaker 3: everything when it comes to that situation.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, and you say, you know, it's not a normal

425
00:21:34,600 --> 00:21:36,040
Speaker 4: way to handle it, but I really don't think there's

426
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Speaker 4: any normal way to handle infidelity. I think, you know,

427
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Speaker 4: I've been exposed to people in my life experiencing that

428
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Speaker 4: in relationships, and like everyone handles it differently, Every situation

429
00:21:47,880 --> 00:21:51,000
Speaker 4: is different, so you know, don't be too hard on yourself.

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Speaker 3: Thank you. It's been really it has. It has taken

431
00:21:54,960 --> 00:21:58,199
Speaker 3: a toll, especially in my mental health. But I've been

432
00:21:58,200 --> 00:22:01,840
Speaker 3: going to therapy. We love therapy, and just really trying

433
00:22:01,880 --> 00:22:05,879
Speaker 3: to move forward and build a life for myself separately

434
00:22:05,960 --> 00:22:08,720
Speaker 3: out here. I want my own identity out here, I

435
00:22:08,720 --> 00:22:10,720
Speaker 3: want my own friends, and I don't want to fall

436
00:22:10,760 --> 00:22:12,719
Speaker 3: into that negative space.

437
00:22:13,640 --> 00:22:16,199
Speaker 1: And I don't think there's anything wrong with forgiving him,

438
00:22:16,280 --> 00:22:20,240
Speaker 1: especially because I think that's that's better on your own

439
00:22:20,280 --> 00:22:22,600
Speaker 1: mental health when you do forgive someone an opposed to

440
00:22:24,000 --> 00:22:27,879
Speaker 1: at least for speaking for myself opposed to holding a grudge,

441
00:22:27,960 --> 00:22:31,720
Speaker 1: because I feel like that negativity will just like linger

442
00:22:31,800 --> 00:22:36,600
Speaker 1: with inside you, and that's I feel like that's not good. Yeah, absolutely,

443
00:22:37,000 --> 00:22:41,000
Speaker 1: as of as of today, do you still speak to Even?

444
00:22:42,640 --> 00:22:44,000
Speaker 3: I knew you guys were going to get into the

445
00:22:44,000 --> 00:22:44,920
Speaker 3: integrity of things.

446
00:22:45,200 --> 00:22:46,480
Speaker 2: Well you said.

447
00:22:47,800 --> 00:22:50,920
Speaker 3: No, it's okay, It's okay, So I will say Even

448
00:22:50,920 --> 00:22:54,760
Speaker 3: and I are really good friends at this point. I

449
00:22:54,800 --> 00:22:57,240
Speaker 3: have just been trying to navigate because I've only been

450
00:22:57,280 --> 00:23:00,440
Speaker 3: here in like two months. I recently started my new

451
00:23:00,720 --> 00:23:04,320
Speaker 3: job two weeks ago, so I've been trying to navigate.

452
00:23:04,520 --> 00:23:09,800
Speaker 3: Thank you being here working and like I said, building

453
00:23:09,800 --> 00:23:13,880
Speaker 3: a life for myself out here separately. So we're very

454
00:23:13,880 --> 00:23:17,200
Speaker 3: good friends. We still catch up. I'm still kind of

455
00:23:18,040 --> 00:23:24,160
Speaker 3: encouraging him on his journey of healing, just as I did.

456
00:23:24,200 --> 00:23:26,520
Speaker 3: And I know he kind of brought it upon himself.

457
00:23:26,560 --> 00:23:29,440
Speaker 3: He did receive a lot of hate in regards to this,

458
00:23:29,960 --> 00:23:32,320
Speaker 3: and that took a big toll on his mental health.

459
00:23:32,359 --> 00:23:36,440
Speaker 3: So just kind of healing from that. But like I said,

460
00:23:36,520 --> 00:23:38,959
Speaker 3: I'm not in a space right now to fully comment

461
00:23:39,000 --> 00:23:42,840
Speaker 3: myself in a relationship with anyone, even included, So I

462
00:23:42,880 --> 00:23:46,879
Speaker 3: think we're both just working on ourselves before we decide

463
00:23:47,119 --> 00:23:49,480
Speaker 3: how we would move forward, if that would even be

464
00:23:49,560 --> 00:23:53,360
Speaker 3: a thing, or how we would grow in our separate ways.

465
00:23:53,720 --> 00:23:55,720
Speaker 4: Have you guys seen each other in person, I feel

466
00:23:55,760 --> 00:23:57,360
Speaker 4: like it would be impossible to avoid each other.

467
00:23:57,720 --> 00:24:01,119
Speaker 3: Yeah, so we have seen each other in person. The

468
00:24:01,240 --> 00:24:04,760
Speaker 3: first interaction I kind of like took my like it

469
00:24:04,840 --> 00:24:07,560
Speaker 3: was it was a shock, just because I hadn't seen

470
00:24:07,640 --> 00:24:14,879
Speaker 3: him in so long prior to everything happening. Everything is

471
00:24:15,080 --> 00:24:17,960
Speaker 3: very cordial, if I think that's the best word to

472
00:24:17,960 --> 00:24:22,880
Speaker 3: put it. It's such a tricky space to navigate because

473
00:24:23,160 --> 00:24:29,439
Speaker 3: I know my worth, I know what I deserve, and

474
00:24:29,480 --> 00:24:33,639
Speaker 3: so I'm trying not to sacrifice any of that for anyone.

475
00:24:34,720 --> 00:24:38,320
Speaker 3: So if there was ever even like a possibility or

476
00:24:38,320 --> 00:24:41,119
Speaker 3: a chance for us to get back together, he would

477
00:24:41,160 --> 00:24:44,159
Speaker 3: have to completely work on himself and I would have

478
00:24:44,240 --> 00:24:46,359
Speaker 3: to know in my heart of hearts like he is

479
00:24:46,400 --> 00:24:51,520
Speaker 3: a changed person. So I just yeah, yeah, it's just

480
00:24:51,560 --> 00:24:54,639
Speaker 3: a lot. It's a lot to process, and I think

481
00:24:54,800 --> 00:24:58,000
Speaker 3: I talked about this on next podcast, But for me,

482
00:24:58,080 --> 00:25:00,520
Speaker 3: it was really hard because I I don't think I'd

483
00:25:00,520 --> 00:25:05,160
Speaker 3: ever truly loved anyone prior to even so I had

484
00:25:05,280 --> 00:25:07,560
Speaker 3: given so much in myself and invested so much in

485
00:25:07,600 --> 00:25:10,920
Speaker 3: our relationship that's very hard just to like walk away

486
00:25:10,920 --> 00:25:15,040
Speaker 3: from immediately in the drop of the hat. So I've

487
00:25:15,080 --> 00:25:17,919
Speaker 3: just been really trying to give myself grace but realize

488
00:25:17,960 --> 00:25:21,080
Speaker 3: who I am, what I deserve, and kind of just

489
00:25:21,119 --> 00:25:22,400
Speaker 3: hold that to the upmost standard.

490
00:25:23,000 --> 00:25:27,600
Speaker 4: Yeah, So what I'm hearing is the door is still

491
00:25:27,640 --> 00:25:31,640
Speaker 4: open if the conditions were right and the work had

492
00:25:31,680 --> 00:25:32,720
Speaker 4: been done.

493
00:25:32,600 --> 00:25:37,240
Speaker 3: Had been done. Yes, And I don't know how long

494
00:25:37,280 --> 00:25:39,919
Speaker 3: that will take. We could both be in a place

495
00:25:39,960 --> 00:25:43,679
Speaker 3: where we've moved on, we've moved forward before that could happen.

496
00:25:44,880 --> 00:25:46,960
Speaker 3: But I guess what I'm trying to say is my

497
00:25:47,040 --> 00:25:50,040
Speaker 3: main focus right now is not dating. My main focus

498
00:25:50,160 --> 00:25:54,960
Speaker 3: is Kylie and building my career. I'm starting nurse practitioners

499
00:25:55,000 --> 00:25:58,000
Speaker 3: school in August. I just moved to a big city. Like,

500
00:25:58,040 --> 00:26:01,120
Speaker 3: there's so many exciting things happening for me that I'm

501
00:26:01,119 --> 00:26:03,240
Speaker 3: not trying to dwell or put my energy into a

502
00:26:03,320 --> 00:26:04,320
Speaker 3: relationship right now.

503
00:26:05,240 --> 00:26:09,720
Speaker 1: You I know you're saying you're not you're not ready

504
00:26:09,720 --> 00:26:13,160
Speaker 1: to fully date. But if let's say you went out

505
00:26:13,160 --> 00:26:15,119
Speaker 1: with your girlfriends and you're at a bar and you

506
00:26:15,160 --> 00:26:19,000
Speaker 1: meet a guy and you're like really into him, are

507
00:26:19,040 --> 00:26:20,320
Speaker 1: you willing to go on?

508
00:26:20,480 --> 00:26:20,560
Speaker 3: Like?

509
00:26:20,600 --> 00:26:22,360
Speaker 1: Are you willing to go on a date and see

510
00:26:22,359 --> 00:26:23,080
Speaker 1: where things go?

511
00:26:24,920 --> 00:26:27,560
Speaker 3: I don't. I don't think it would be responsible for

512
00:26:27,560 --> 00:26:30,320
Speaker 3: me to do so right now, just because it wouldn't

513
00:26:30,359 --> 00:26:33,320
Speaker 3: be It wouldn't be fair to the other person because

514
00:26:33,400 --> 00:26:36,560
Speaker 3: I in that moment, you know, like lust and desire,

515
00:26:36,720 --> 00:26:40,080
Speaker 3: I could potentially feel ready, but I know in my heart,

516
00:26:40,240 --> 00:26:43,320
Speaker 3: like one, oh, part of it still belongs to my

517
00:26:43,440 --> 00:26:46,400
Speaker 3: relationship with Aban, and I'm trying to recover and heal

518
00:26:46,440 --> 00:26:48,760
Speaker 3: from that and like move on from that because I

519
00:26:48,800 --> 00:26:52,040
Speaker 3: know it's already April. But like I said, I was

520
00:26:52,080 --> 00:26:53,720
Speaker 3: so blindsided by all of this.

521
00:26:54,200 --> 00:26:55,760
Speaker 2: Yeah, and there's no timeline.

522
00:26:55,800 --> 00:26:58,879
Speaker 3: There's no timeline, and trust me, it would be so easy.

523
00:26:59,000 --> 00:27:00,680
Speaker 3: My life would be so much better if I could

524
00:27:00,720 --> 00:27:02,480
Speaker 3: have just woken up the next day after I found

525
00:27:02,480 --> 00:27:05,520
Speaker 3: out now about it and was like, if him, screw him,

526
00:27:05,560 --> 00:27:08,960
Speaker 3: I never want to see him again because then I

527
00:27:09,000 --> 00:27:10,680
Speaker 3: could just like wipe my hands clean and moved on.

528
00:27:10,880 --> 00:27:13,639
Speaker 3: But unfortunately that just hasn't been my healing journey. So

529
00:27:14,760 --> 00:27:17,200
Speaker 3: I don't think it would be fair to the other

530
00:27:17,320 --> 00:27:20,760
Speaker 3: person if I put myself off there right now. Could

531
00:27:20,800 --> 00:27:24,480
Speaker 3: that change next week? Absolutely, But I just I just

532
00:27:24,520 --> 00:27:27,920
Speaker 3: need the time and space to grow, and I'm typically old.

533
00:27:28,000 --> 00:27:30,360
Speaker 3: Kylie would be like, oh, absolutely, because it could kind

534
00:27:30,400 --> 00:27:33,480
Speaker 3: of just feel fill avoid at that point. But I'm

535
00:27:33,520 --> 00:27:37,440
Speaker 3: really trying to be mature and grow, so I think

536
00:27:37,440 --> 00:27:39,800
Speaker 3: for myself right now, what's best for me. I just

537
00:27:39,840 --> 00:27:40,639
Speaker 3: need to focus on me.

538
00:27:47,560 --> 00:27:51,439
Speaker 4: If Paradise was a thing and you were in a

539
00:27:51,560 --> 00:27:52,360
Speaker 4: place where you.

540
00:27:52,320 --> 00:27:54,560
Speaker 2: Felt ready to date, would you go back?

541
00:27:55,800 --> 00:27:59,440
Speaker 3: So I think when it comes to Paradise, I would

542
00:27:59,480 --> 00:28:02,040
Speaker 3: have to the door between Ave and I would have

543
00:28:02,080 --> 00:28:06,680
Speaker 3: to be closed. And then again, I don't know if

544
00:28:06,720 --> 00:28:10,960
Speaker 3: America wants to see me crying every other day of

545
00:28:11,000 --> 00:28:13,440
Speaker 3: the week again, So you would probably have to ask

546
00:28:13,560 --> 00:28:16,520
Speaker 3: America if they're not that avoid with see me, then maybe,

547
00:28:16,640 --> 00:28:22,160
Speaker 3: But honestly, I don't know. I loved Paradise so much,

548
00:28:22,200 --> 00:28:24,280
Speaker 3: Like when Jesse came down the stairs and told us

549
00:28:24,320 --> 00:28:26,160
Speaker 3: that it was over, like I wanted to cry because

550
00:28:26,160 --> 00:28:28,600
Speaker 3: I was so upset, Like no, I'm like Kinnesas forever.

551
00:28:29,359 --> 00:28:34,639
Speaker 3: But the aftermath of Paradise really took a toll on me,

552
00:28:35,200 --> 00:28:38,080
Speaker 3: not just in regards to like the ave and stuff,

553
00:28:38,120 --> 00:28:41,640
Speaker 3: but I did receive a lot of hate. So I

554
00:28:41,680 --> 00:28:43,040
Speaker 3: just don't know if I would want to put myself

555
00:28:43,080 --> 00:28:45,680
Speaker 3: back out there again. But if America would promise to

556
00:28:45,760 --> 00:28:47,480
Speaker 3: be kind, I don't know. It would just have to

557
00:28:47,480 --> 00:28:49,880
Speaker 3: be the right time. I don't know.

558
00:28:50,000 --> 00:28:52,080
Speaker 2: That's hard, that's fair saying.

559
00:28:52,960 --> 00:28:55,640
Speaker 3: I don't want to sound like a hypocrite, like absolutely no,

560
00:28:57,360 --> 00:28:58,120
Speaker 3: but I don't know.

561
00:28:58,680 --> 00:29:01,200
Speaker 4: But it's okay to say, like based on what I

562
00:29:01,200 --> 00:29:04,040
Speaker 4: went through, Like if they were like no right now,

563
00:29:04,040 --> 00:29:05,440
Speaker 4: it's okay, Like we will hold you to it.

564
00:29:05,520 --> 00:29:07,040
Speaker 2: If in a year they asked you and you decide

565
00:29:07,040 --> 00:29:08,080
Speaker 2: to go, we won't hold you to that.

566
00:29:08,240 --> 00:29:09,920
Speaker 3: Okay, Okay, okay, thanks three.

567
00:29:10,800 --> 00:29:14,440
Speaker 1: So you're really not ready to date, go on another

568
00:29:14,520 --> 00:29:17,920
Speaker 1: dating show, or do anything until the door is fully

569
00:29:17,920 --> 00:29:20,880
Speaker 1: closed with AVA or fully open and the door is

570
00:29:20,920 --> 00:29:23,200
Speaker 1: not the door is not fully closed.

571
00:29:23,440 --> 00:29:27,920
Speaker 3: Yeah, I don't think it would be fair for me

572
00:29:28,160 --> 00:29:32,600
Speaker 3: to put myself out there in that way if the

573
00:29:32,680 --> 00:29:37,920
Speaker 3: door was somewhat open with anyone. So, yeah, to be

574
00:29:37,960 --> 00:29:39,320
Speaker 3: respectful to all parties.

575
00:29:40,040 --> 00:29:42,920
Speaker 1: Yes, you're right, I'm going to ask you one more question.

576
00:29:43,000 --> 00:29:44,400
Speaker 1: Then we're going to play a game.

577
00:29:44,760 --> 00:29:45,120
Speaker 3: Okay.

578
00:29:45,240 --> 00:29:50,400
Speaker 1: Thanks not to not not at all to excuse even

579
00:29:50,520 --> 00:29:53,240
Speaker 1: of his actions, because I think he was in the wrong.

580
00:29:54,080 --> 00:29:59,240
Speaker 1: But do you think if the circumstances were different as

581
00:29:59,280 --> 00:30:04,080
Speaker 1: far as you met in real life, you didn't meet

582
00:30:04,120 --> 00:30:07,480
Speaker 1: on a dating show and you lived in the same city.

583
00:30:08,160 --> 00:30:13,520
Speaker 1: Do you think do you think he would have cheated that?

584
00:30:14,200 --> 00:30:17,160
Speaker 2: WHOA a crazy question, ask your Joe.

585
00:30:17,480 --> 00:30:21,720
Speaker 3: Well, I'm just well, because we talked about this, so

586
00:30:21,800 --> 00:30:24,240
Speaker 3: I can kind of give you an insight of how

587
00:30:24,240 --> 00:30:26,240
Speaker 3: we navigated that conversation.

588
00:30:26,120 --> 00:30:29,160
Speaker 1: Because I figured that. I figured that because I think

589
00:30:29,240 --> 00:30:34,320
Speaker 1: that is an excuse that most people make that cheat

590
00:30:34,560 --> 00:30:37,960
Speaker 1: that go on a dating show, because the excuse is

591
00:30:37,640 --> 00:30:42,440
Speaker 1: it's not I'm different in a real relationship, like they

592
00:30:42,520 --> 00:30:45,360
Speaker 1: use it as as an excuse. Okay, And I'm just

593
00:30:45,360 --> 00:30:45,880
Speaker 1: curus I'm.

594
00:30:45,800 --> 00:30:48,000
Speaker 2: Curious if he used the distance in the show as

595
00:30:48,040 --> 00:30:48,520
Speaker 2: an excuse.

596
00:30:48,600 --> 00:30:50,240
Speaker 1: Yeah, and I want to know what. Yeah, Well, her.

597
00:30:50,120 --> 00:30:52,960
Speaker 3: Thoughts, So we actually did. This was one of the

598
00:30:53,800 --> 00:30:57,360
Speaker 3: we had like a big debrief at one point and

599
00:30:57,440 --> 00:30:59,360
Speaker 3: he kind of just kind of came to me with

600
00:31:00,320 --> 00:31:03,880
Speaker 3: I'm not using any of this as an excuse quote unquote.

601
00:31:03,960 --> 00:31:07,280
Speaker 3: I'm just kind of telling you each time that it happened,

602
00:31:07,360 --> 00:31:10,400
Speaker 3: this is where my head's face was at, and so

603
00:31:11,440 --> 00:31:16,000
Speaker 3: there's no excuse for any of it. The like I

604
00:31:16,040 --> 00:31:18,360
Speaker 3: talked about in the bile Flous the first original time

605
00:31:18,360 --> 00:31:21,440
Speaker 3: in July, when it happened when I received the pictures.

606
00:31:22,960 --> 00:31:25,000
Speaker 3: I was a little bit like, Okay, we had just

607
00:31:25,040 --> 00:31:28,000
Speaker 3: got back from the show. If we wouldn't have been

608
00:31:28,000 --> 00:31:30,000
Speaker 3: on the show, we probably wouldn't even be dating at

609
00:31:30,000 --> 00:31:33,360
Speaker 3: this point, probably still just talking, so like, maybe we

610
00:31:33,400 --> 00:31:35,320
Speaker 3: can work through that. But then when I found out

611
00:31:35,320 --> 00:31:38,480
Speaker 3: about the Boston situation, I'm like, Okay, there's no excuse

612
00:31:38,520 --> 00:31:41,920
Speaker 3: for that. Like I can't ever get past this. He

613
00:31:42,000 --> 00:31:47,040
Speaker 3: did say in July, whenever he got home, a lot

614
00:31:47,120 --> 00:31:49,680
Speaker 3: of his friends were kind of like asking him about

615
00:31:49,680 --> 00:31:52,880
Speaker 3: our relationship, asking him about the seriousness of it, and

616
00:31:52,920 --> 00:31:56,479
Speaker 3: he was very excited, and they just kept planting in

617
00:31:56,520 --> 00:31:59,200
Speaker 3: his ear, well, you know, it is a paradise, just

618
00:31:59,240 --> 00:32:02,520
Speaker 3: a paradiselationship. I do you think it's actually going to last.

619
00:32:04,000 --> 00:32:07,080
Speaker 3: So his excuse in a sense of doing what he

620
00:32:07,120 --> 00:32:10,240
Speaker 3: did in July was because he thought that it wasn't

621
00:32:10,280 --> 00:32:15,360
Speaker 3: actually like a lasting relationship. Which I was very taken

622
00:32:15,360 --> 00:32:19,200
Speaker 3: aback by that, because in my eyes, especially even though

623
00:32:19,240 --> 00:32:23,840
Speaker 3: it was early, I never once questioned, oh, we just

624
00:32:23,880 --> 00:32:27,360
Speaker 3: did that for TV. I think him and I went

625
00:32:27,400 --> 00:32:31,959
Speaker 3: to Paradise for very different reasons. I think he of

626
00:32:31,960 --> 00:32:34,760
Speaker 3: course wanted to go and like hopefully find someone, but

627
00:32:34,840 --> 00:32:37,880
Speaker 3: he didn't really hold much weight to that. For myself,

628
00:32:38,120 --> 00:32:41,720
Speaker 3: I didn't care about gaining an extra Instagram follower or

629
00:32:41,840 --> 00:32:43,680
Speaker 3: getting paid like, I didn't care about any of that.

630
00:32:43,760 --> 00:32:45,680
Speaker 3: Like I wanted to find a man. I wanted to

631
00:32:45,760 --> 00:32:49,000
Speaker 3: leave happy, and that's all that was important to me.

632
00:32:49,400 --> 00:32:51,440
Speaker 2: Yeah, that was very evident watching you on the show.

633
00:32:51,520 --> 00:32:56,760
Speaker 3: Yeah, clearly. Yeah, And so I think in the beginning,

634
00:32:56,920 --> 00:32:59,800
Speaker 3: for sure, if we would have met in a conventional way,

635
00:33:00,360 --> 00:33:02,520
Speaker 3: I would have been in San Diego, we wouldn't had

636
00:33:02,520 --> 00:33:05,800
Speaker 3: the pressure of distance. Then I would hope he wouldn't.

637
00:33:06,160 --> 00:33:09,600
Speaker 3: But then again, this is going to sound crazy too.

638
00:33:09,880 --> 00:33:13,760
Speaker 3: I think in order for Avan to become a changed man,

639
00:33:13,840 --> 00:33:15,920
Speaker 3: I don't want to speak on him, but in order

640
00:33:15,960 --> 00:33:18,680
Speaker 3: for him to truly become the man that he deserves

641
00:33:18,720 --> 00:33:23,000
Speaker 3: to be for someone, if that's not me, I think

642
00:33:23,040 --> 00:33:26,200
Speaker 3: this needed to happen. I think unfortunately it happened to me,

643
00:33:26,320 --> 00:33:28,880
Speaker 3: but I think he needed to wake up call that

644
00:33:29,480 --> 00:33:32,320
Speaker 3: he did have some character flaws he does need to change,

645
00:33:32,640 --> 00:33:35,120
Speaker 3: And unfortunately it happened on this magnitude, But he had

646
00:33:35,160 --> 00:33:38,440
Speaker 3: the whole world looking at him, and that is what

647
00:33:38,520 --> 00:33:41,760
Speaker 3: has forced him to become a completely different person. So

648
00:33:43,080 --> 00:33:45,120
Speaker 3: I don't know I would hope that if we met

649
00:33:45,160 --> 00:33:47,600
Speaker 3: in a conventional way, he wouldn't have done so, and

650
00:33:48,000 --> 00:33:51,200
Speaker 3: it sucks that he did it to me, but I

651
00:33:51,240 --> 00:33:54,360
Speaker 3: think for him and his personal growth journey, I think

652
00:33:54,400 --> 00:33:55,360
Speaker 3: it needed to happen.

653
00:33:57,080 --> 00:34:00,760
Speaker 1: Yeah. Cool, I like that. But then it makes you

654
00:34:00,800 --> 00:34:04,240
Speaker 1: answered my question, Well, I think that makes sense.

655
00:34:05,200 --> 00:34:06,400
Speaker 3: Is it? I don't know, it's so long?

656
00:34:06,520 --> 00:34:09,880
Speaker 1: No, No, I think I think it does. I I'm

657
00:34:09,920 --> 00:34:12,040
Speaker 1: also curious too, because I know, like the door is

658
00:34:12,040 --> 00:34:16,600
Speaker 1: still open. So yeah, to me, I'm like, well, if

659
00:34:16,640 --> 00:34:20,160
Speaker 1: the door is still open, you're considering potentially getting back

660
00:34:20,200 --> 00:34:22,680
Speaker 1: with him, But I know you wouldn't get back with

661
00:34:22,760 --> 00:34:25,640
Speaker 1: him if you think that he would cheat again. So

662
00:34:25,680 --> 00:34:29,000
Speaker 1: that's why I'm more curious to think, like, maybe if

663
00:34:29,120 --> 00:34:32,360
Speaker 1: if you did live in the same city, state and

664
00:34:32,440 --> 00:34:36,160
Speaker 1: now it's it's not a relationship off the show, it's

665
00:34:36,239 --> 00:34:37,160
Speaker 1: just different.

666
00:34:37,920 --> 00:34:41,320
Speaker 4: Is that a concern in your mind that is maybe

667
00:34:41,320 --> 00:34:45,359
Speaker 4: holding you back from revisiting that relationship that he may

668
00:34:45,400 --> 00:34:45,839
Speaker 4: do it again.

669
00:34:48,360 --> 00:34:54,120
Speaker 3: I would say so, I I he has changed. I've

670
00:34:54,160 --> 00:34:57,400
Speaker 3: seen just so much growth in him in a couple

671
00:34:57,400 --> 00:35:02,080
Speaker 3: of months that he's been working on himself. So gun

672
00:35:02,200 --> 00:35:04,279
Speaker 3: to my head right now, I don't think he would

673
00:35:04,280 --> 00:35:07,239
Speaker 3: ever do that again, but it's any Like, I feel

674
00:35:07,239 --> 00:35:11,279
Speaker 3: like it would be abnormal for as a human to

675
00:35:11,320 --> 00:35:15,399
Speaker 3: not have that small insecurity in the back of my brain, like, Okay, well,

676
00:35:15,440 --> 00:35:17,359
Speaker 3: if he's going out with his friends without me, like

677
00:35:17,520 --> 00:35:19,799
Speaker 3: what is he doing? Because that one time he did that,

678
00:35:20,320 --> 00:35:24,800
Speaker 3: obviously it led to a different thing. He he would

679
00:35:24,960 --> 00:35:27,200
Speaker 3: give me all of the reassurance in the world right now,

680
00:35:27,360 --> 00:35:30,200
Speaker 3: and he's working to do that. But it's still just

681
00:35:30,280 --> 00:35:34,080
Speaker 3: that human flaw of like thinking, okay, that insecurity of like, okay,

682
00:35:34,600 --> 00:35:36,719
Speaker 3: but what is he doing tonight? I haven't heard from him,

683
00:35:37,080 --> 00:35:40,279
Speaker 3: you know, So it's really hard. I just have to like,

684
00:35:40,480 --> 00:35:43,960
Speaker 3: if I were to want to jump back into something

685
00:35:44,080 --> 00:35:47,319
Speaker 3: like that, I would. It would only be healthy for

686
00:35:47,400 --> 00:35:50,560
Speaker 3: our relationship to fully one hundred percent trust him. I

687
00:35:50,600 --> 00:35:53,200
Speaker 3: can't continue to harbor or bring back what he did

688
00:35:53,200 --> 00:35:56,440
Speaker 3: in the past enable in order for us to move forward.

689
00:35:57,560 --> 00:36:00,680
Speaker 3: So that's another thing. In order for us to get

690
00:36:00,719 --> 00:36:03,920
Speaker 3: back to that place, I need to trust him and

691
00:36:03,920 --> 00:36:05,400
Speaker 3: not have that insecurity anymore.

692
00:36:06,160 --> 00:36:07,920
Speaker 2: Yeah, one hundred percent. I agree.

693
00:36:08,080 --> 00:36:11,000
Speaker 4: Well, wishing you the best on that journey. Whether the

694
00:36:11,040 --> 00:36:13,279
Speaker 4: door opens back up or closes.

695
00:36:15,120 --> 00:36:16,800
Speaker 2: I just hope that you end up happy.

696
00:36:17,320 --> 00:36:20,359
Speaker 3: I appreciate you. I know, I just wanna. I want

697
00:36:20,360 --> 00:36:22,400
Speaker 3: to be you. Guys. I'm ready just to be settled

698
00:36:22,400 --> 00:36:25,880
Speaker 3: down and just living my best life with my partner,

699
00:36:26,040 --> 00:36:27,879
Speaker 3: so hoping that one day I can get there.

700
00:36:28,280 --> 00:36:31,040
Speaker 6: Well, in the meantime, enjoy the bars with Jess and

701
00:36:32,080 --> 00:36:32,719
Speaker 6: dining in TV.

702
00:36:33,640 --> 00:36:37,800
Speaker 4: Yeah, have fun in Phoebe. Let's play a little game.

703
00:36:38,960 --> 00:36:43,640
Speaker 4: Let's do rapid fire get to know me with Kylie Russell.

704
00:36:43,840 --> 00:36:45,960
Speaker 4: So we're gonna ask you some questions and just the

705
00:36:46,000 --> 00:36:49,520
Speaker 4: first answer that comes to your mind. Okay, perfect, Okay, cool,

706
00:36:50,400 --> 00:37:00,479
Speaker 4: So dream vacation spot. Goodbye, Go to self care mask

707
00:37:01,760 --> 00:37:03,880
Speaker 4: favorite song or artist.

708
00:37:06,280 --> 00:37:06,840
Speaker 3: Justin Bieber.

709
00:37:08,120 --> 00:37:10,440
Speaker 2: I feel like we may have asked you that last time.

710
00:37:11,040 --> 00:37:14,560
Speaker 3: He last time, and I will die say no time.

711
00:37:16,960 --> 00:37:21,920
Speaker 6: Go to drink at a bar, m tequila, pineapples. Favorite

712
00:37:21,920 --> 00:37:27,240
Speaker 6: food or cuisine anything Italian and Mountain Deal and chicken

713
00:37:27,239 --> 00:37:27,960
Speaker 6: fingers and fries.

714
00:37:28,640 --> 00:37:32,640
Speaker 3: Oh sorry, I know, Hi was Yeah that too?

715
00:37:34,080 --> 00:37:39,080
Speaker 6: Gold or silver jewelry gold for sure. Wine night in

716
00:37:39,440 --> 00:37:40,600
Speaker 6: or girls night out.

717
00:37:41,760 --> 00:37:43,640
Speaker 3: I'm kind of a lazy girl, so definitely wine.

718
00:37:43,880 --> 00:37:47,280
Speaker 2: D current favorite beauty product.

719
00:37:48,480 --> 00:37:52,799
Speaker 3: I just got into, like the bronzing drops. I don't

720
00:37:52,880 --> 00:37:55,160
Speaker 3: like to wear a lot of makeup at work because

721
00:37:55,160 --> 00:37:56,600
Speaker 3: I don't want to wake up early for that. So

722
00:37:56,640 --> 00:37:58,080
Speaker 3: if I just put some of those on my face,

723
00:37:58,080 --> 00:38:01,000
Speaker 3: it looks like I have makeup and then plus my so.

724
00:38:01,600 --> 00:38:03,120
Speaker 2: You know what I just started.

725
00:38:03,280 --> 00:38:07,440
Speaker 4: I I typically stray away from like skin tints just

726
00:38:07,440 --> 00:38:08,560
Speaker 4: because my skin so sensitive.

727
00:38:08,560 --> 00:38:10,640
Speaker 2: I haven't really found one that like sits well with

728
00:38:10,680 --> 00:38:11,040
Speaker 2: my skin.

729
00:38:11,160 --> 00:38:14,759
Speaker 4: But the first aid beauty bronzing drops are to try.

730
00:38:14,840 --> 00:38:17,319
Speaker 4: Oh good, I put them like if I'm wearing like

731
00:38:17,320 --> 00:38:19,319
Speaker 4: stropless clothes. I'll literally put it like all over my

732
00:38:19,400 --> 00:38:21,719
Speaker 4: cast my shoulders. Yeah, it's really like that.

733
00:38:22,120 --> 00:38:23,640
Speaker 3: And you said it's first eight.

734
00:38:23,960 --> 00:38:26,280
Speaker 2: First aid beauty. That's okay.

735
00:38:26,280 --> 00:38:27,160
Speaker 3: I'm gonna go look for it.

736
00:38:28,440 --> 00:38:30,200
Speaker 2: Go to comfort movie or show.

737
00:38:31,080 --> 00:38:34,880
Speaker 3: How to Lose a Guy in Today's a classic on.

738
00:38:37,560 --> 00:38:38,840
Speaker 2: Favorite season.

739
00:38:40,760 --> 00:38:43,160
Speaker 3: Summer. I'm excited for San Diego summers.

740
00:38:43,560 --> 00:38:45,880
Speaker 4: Oh yeah, it'll be your first time having like a

741
00:38:45,960 --> 00:38:47,320
Speaker 4: full year of summer.

742
00:38:47,680 --> 00:38:50,799
Speaker 3: Yeah, I'm so excited. I am. I am quite disappointed

743
00:38:50,800 --> 00:38:54,000
Speaker 3: in the weather. It's been very chilly thus far. I

744
00:38:54,000 --> 00:38:55,440
Speaker 3: always feel like I have to at least have a

745
00:38:55,520 --> 00:38:58,239
Speaker 3: jacket one So I'm ready for like the summer summer time.

746
00:38:58,280 --> 00:39:01,760
Speaker 2: Here, same girl. And then what is your favorite holiday?

747
00:39:02,680 --> 00:39:05,080
Speaker 3: I would say Christmas because that's when all of my

748
00:39:05,120 --> 00:39:05,880
Speaker 3: family gets together.

749
00:39:06,880 --> 00:39:08,000
Speaker 2: Christmas is the right answer.

750
00:39:08,280 --> 00:39:13,120
Speaker 1: Yes, Christmas is the only answer. Christmas. Well, Kylie, thank

751
00:39:13,120 --> 00:39:15,840
Speaker 1: you so much for coming on bet your Happy Hour again.

752
00:39:16,360 --> 00:39:17,759
Speaker 1: It was really nice catching up with you.

753
00:39:18,760 --> 00:39:21,480
Speaker 3: I appreciate you. We got deep today, but it was

754
00:39:21,600 --> 00:39:23,280
Speaker 3: nice talking it all with you guys.

755
00:39:23,760 --> 00:39:26,040
Speaker 1: Not at the beginning though. The first five talked about

756
00:39:26,280 --> 00:39:30,239
Speaker 1: candy and pretzels and you're talking about And thank you

757
00:39:30,280 --> 00:39:32,319
Speaker 1: to all our listeners for tuning in. Make sure you

758
00:39:33,160 --> 00:39:36,120
Speaker 1: stay tuned in and subscribe because we have exclusive interviews

759
00:39:36,239 --> 00:39:37,320
Speaker 1: every week.

760
00:39:37,960 --> 00:39:40,480
Speaker 6: Yep, don't fore to subscribe, and thanks for listening.

761
00:39:40,640 --> 00:39:41,359
Speaker 2: Bye bye,