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Speaker 1: Today, I effed up by telling people at my friend's

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Speaker 1: wedding I'm from Texas.

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Speaker 2: Oh no, Texas, I mean, no, no, we love Texas.

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Speaker 2: I do see how people might be in a fit.

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Speaker 2: You know, it could be which is living, especially living

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Speaker 2: in California Los Angeles, Like there's a little we got

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Speaker 2: a little bit of a friendly or not so friendly

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Speaker 2: beef with Texas over here. I think, Yeah, I think

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Speaker 2: it's me personally. You get some people get ideas, you

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Speaker 2: know what I mean. I guess I'll begin by saying,

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Speaker 2: I'm a twenty five female and I'm from Texas. One

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Speaker 2: of my friends lives in New Jersey and she recently

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Speaker 2: got married. I flew up from Texas and there was

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Speaker 2: over one hundred people, but I was the only one

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Speaker 2: from Texas. Thing the lone star state more like in

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Speaker 2: the state of being alone. That's right, all alone.

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Speaker 1: Just flicking that thing on the back of boots, you know,

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Speaker 1: the star. Yeah, yeah, by yourself. That's like that's the

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Speaker 1: Texas version of twiddling your thumbs.

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Speaker 3: Yeah.

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Speaker 2: I just like, like, I'm just imagining Woody from yeah exactly,

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Speaker 2: from toy Story.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, pretty much pretty much. Which also, I wonder

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Speaker 1: what those serve. But that's the question for there there.

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Speaker 2: I do know what they are, Yeah, I forgot what

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Speaker 2: they're called. Uh it's like spokes or its spurs, spurs, spurs,

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Speaker 2: so they're called like spurs, and uh, they are for

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Speaker 2: kicking into your horse. So like when you're when you're

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Speaker 2: trying to make your horse like go faster, you need

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Speaker 2: to cause it physical pain, I guess, and so you

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Speaker 2: spur your horse and like they're like, how that hurts,

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Speaker 2: and so they run faster. Yeah, dude, it's it's super

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Speaker 2: spiky and it's like the role it rolls so like

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Speaker 2: the spikes don't tear the skin, but they like like

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Speaker 2: like pokes in.

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Speaker 3: You feel it, but it doesn't like pierce.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, it doesn't like it doesn't like fuck you up

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Speaker 2: too hard, but it doesn't hurt.

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Speaker 3: Wow.

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Speaker 2: The more you know, that could be totally wrong.

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Speaker 3: I don't know that that.

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Speaker 2: Sounds like it's probably acurate. My I, my mom, and

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Speaker 2: my sister are both horse riders. But I'm allergic to

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Speaker 2: horses actually, so I've never heard of anyone being allergic

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Speaker 2: to horse. The allergic horses, bro, I've kind of grown

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Speaker 2: out of it, but uh, it was bad, dude, it

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Speaker 2: was really really really bad. Like how like like like

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Speaker 2: you see a horse and then you just like anaphylactic talk.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, all, not quite anaphalactic shock, but just like, uh,

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Speaker 1: I could barely barely see because my eyes were so swall.

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Speaker 1: My eyes were basically like almost swollen shut like no

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Speaker 1: freaking crusty eyes. Tears snot rolling down my nose.

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Speaker 2: Like because you were like you were hard after riding

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Speaker 2: the horse.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, like like the first time that I found out

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Speaker 1: was like a pony, and like I started feeling bad.

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Speaker 1: So I went to watch a SpongeBob DVD in the

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Speaker 1: car and then my parents opened the door and literally

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Speaker 1: my entire face was just like closed.

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Speaker 3: I was like, it was terrible, dude.

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Speaker 2: That's freaking rough. Wow. Yeah, this is the first time

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Speaker 2: I've ever heard someone being allergic from horses.

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Speaker 3: There's always one, baby, We're a rare breeze. Were revered.

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Speaker 1: So back with op and Texas. Uh so, so during

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Speaker 1: the night I was talking to some of the people

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Speaker 1: at the wedding and they asked me where I'm from,

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Speaker 1: and they and I mentioned I'm from Texas. Their moods

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Speaker 1: changed almost right away. They're like ew ew disgusting. You

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Speaker 1: like get Texas toast and barbecue and bane and beans.

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Speaker 2: And uh, I don't know the cradle tumbleweeds.

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Speaker 3: Flat land oil oil.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, oh yeah, they gotta be boy boots, cowboy boots

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Speaker 1: for shows horses. Ten gallon hats, oh, ten gallon hats

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Speaker 1: with no liquid in them?

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Speaker 2: Yeah, dude, Like like, are you not really putting? Like no,

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Speaker 2: they put the oil in the ten gallon hats. That's

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Speaker 2: I guess that's one way about then you fill up

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Speaker 2: your car. That's why you know. That's why they call

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Speaker 2: it tipping the hat, because you're tipping the hat into

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Speaker 2: your uh, into your fusel lodge.

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Speaker 3: You almost had me for a second.

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Speaker 1: I was I was definitely about to ask if you

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Speaker 1: were like I was like, wait, ten gallon Okay, no,

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Speaker 1: you you were so close. I very much can menji

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Speaker 1: because I was right there.

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Speaker 2: Ladies, I am going to start telling John like random

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Speaker 2: facts that are just dude, I don't know if I

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Speaker 2: told I think I may have told you this before.

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Speaker 2: By my sister. I was like she was saying like

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Speaker 2: some she was saying some like fact, and usually I

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Speaker 2: just like trust her because she's like pretty smart, knowledgeable.

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Speaker 3: Your sister.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, and my sister and then like, I'm like, wait,

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Speaker 2: that doesn't sound right, and I looked it up and

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Speaker 2: then she started laughing, and I'm like, why why are

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Speaker 2: you laughing? Like you just told me like a wrong

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Speaker 2: fact that's not thought funny. And she's like, I have

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Speaker 2: been telling you wrong facts for years, and so you

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Speaker 2: will use them in conversation and slowly find out everything

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Speaker 2: that you've known or ever known is wrong and you

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Speaker 2: won't be able to trust your knowledge anymore.

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Speaker 3: My god.

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Speaker 1: And I'm like, that is what the heck Sopia, dude.

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Speaker 1: That is as as tragic and like evil as that is.

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Speaker 1: That is a incredible prank.

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Speaker 2: Your a whole, your whole like ability to like look

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Speaker 2: at the world crumbles underneath.

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Speaker 3: That is Wow, dude, Sophia, Wow, salute you really you

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Speaker 3: really are in this game. Pranked?

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Speaker 1: You are really in this game. Well, there you go.

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Speaker 1: That's a that's a red as story for another. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: So some of the men and women at the wedding

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Speaker 1: started talking to me about guns and how texts people

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Speaker 1: are like mentioning the border and things about rednecks et cetera,

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Speaker 1: et cetera, basically acting like they should be wary of me,

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Speaker 1: just coming right out at me with a bunch of stereotypes.

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Speaker 2: That's allergic to Texans as he is the horse, that's right.

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Speaker 3: Just kidding. Yeah, we love Texas. We do love Texas.

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Speaker 1: It was it was shocking for me to hear them

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Speaker 1: and see how they were acting differently towards me after this.

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Speaker 1: I'm kind of a big girl with a couple of tattoos.

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Speaker 1: And one of the women asked me if I've been

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Speaker 1: in a fight in a saloon before, which is.

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Speaker 3: Like, that's that's the craziest question.

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Speaker 2: But they're just roasting her.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, I mean that's an actual rose.

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Speaker 2: That's just a rose, that's not.

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Speaker 1: An actual Like, so tell me, like, have you gotten

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Speaker 1: an altercation.

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Speaker 3: In a saloon before?

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Speaker 2: No, It's like I see, like, oh, so, like, did

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Speaker 2: you pack your ten gallon hat with you or did

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Speaker 2: you leave it on the ranch?

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Speaker 3: So was the duel at dawn or dusk or dusk?

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Speaker 1: I feel like I fucked up by mentioning this, But

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Speaker 1: on the other hand, I was not ready for their

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Speaker 1: reactions either.

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Speaker 3: So what should I do?

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Speaker 2: Probably get a new driver's license and just say it

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Speaker 2: from like Minnesota or something.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, basically I think get facial reconstructive surgery. Actually yeah,

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Speaker 1: mostly vocal reconstructive surgery.

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Speaker 3: So there's no hint whatsoever, no like not even like

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Speaker 3: a hint.

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Speaker 1: Basically sound like maybe maybe maybe get like al Green's

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Speaker 1: like vocal cord pattern. Al Green like the singer. He's

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Speaker 1: like he made a bunch of like classic like.

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Speaker 2: Old or what like like what sing it?

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Speaker 3: I can't even name one right now, but he is

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Speaker 3: like a very like that.

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Speaker 2: He made a bunch of classic songs and that I

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Speaker 2: can't even name that. I can't even name Alexa or

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Speaker 2: there is no like, hey, Siri, play al Green. Let's

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Speaker 2: get married, did you? Let's get No, that's Marvin Gay.

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Speaker 3: Let's stay together. That's that's definitely one. Anyways, A very deep,

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Speaker 3: beautiful voice. Get that. Live your life,