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Speaker 1: Welcome to Ja dot M, a production of I heart radio.

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Speaker 1: What's up everybody, it is always a pleasure to share

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Speaker 1: thoughts and feelings with you. You You know, just have conversation

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Speaker 1: to spark some conversation. Chow. Welcome to J dot elder podcast.

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Speaker 1: This is Jill Scott. Jill Scott, I gotta say it

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Speaker 1: right because you know, there is an exclamation point at

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Speaker 1: the end of my name all my birth certificate. It's

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Speaker 1: Jill Scott. Yeah, I'm here with my sister friends, like

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Speaker 1: it's St Claud No, it's no, it's just a period,

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Speaker 1: like it's Saint Clair. Sorry, Jill, we're not all that privileges,

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Speaker 1: just like Ya, St Clair. And was there a period?

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Speaker 1: There actually wasn't, but in my mind it's a period, period, period,

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Speaker 1: and the lovely age of great and dance La yes,

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Speaker 1: come more high filations like it. You know you're into

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Speaker 1: the friends. Listen to me. I'm struggling. I'm struggling with

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Speaker 1: trying my best to have some discipline. Okay, just discipline.

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Speaker 1: You know, I'm I'm supposed to be Um doing a

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Speaker 1: lot of things on a daily basis and I just

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Speaker 1: don't want to me like, I don't know what's happening

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Speaker 1: and my because of my age, I'm like, I'm going

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Speaker 1: to opt down with these things. You know, like I

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Speaker 1: want I want my house a certain way. My House

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Speaker 1: is together, but my room, I don't. I don't want. No,

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Speaker 1: I don't want to dog like it's terrible. You got

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Speaker 1: a messy room, just guys. That what you're saying. I

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Speaker 1: am saying it. I'm saying it. Well, my yeah, my

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Speaker 1: part of the room is is messy and of the

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Speaker 1: bathroom is messy. Like that's not what's up, like what's

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Speaker 1: going on? And I live with somebody who's a neat freak. Oh,

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Speaker 1: that's cool. See what your finger up there, your agent,

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Speaker 1: why are your finger like that? What was that I

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Speaker 1: just said? That's that's a toughie. That's a toughie. How

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Speaker 1: does one get self discipline? How? There are people, there

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Speaker 1: are people out here. I know that they are faithful

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Speaker 1: and they go to the gym at least three or

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Speaker 1: four times in a week, you know, and I'm like,

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Speaker 1: it's Jim in my basement and I know where it is.

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Speaker 1: You might have to change that phrasing from like self discipline,

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Speaker 1: like how does one get they ask motivated, because that's

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Speaker 1: what it's saying, like it could be motivation, but I

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Speaker 1: think I think discipline is is kind of a discipline

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Speaker 1: to keeping active. I think they are cousins. I think

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Speaker 1: motivation and discipline are definitely cousins. They grew up in

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Speaker 1: the same household, because you gotta stay you gotta get

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Speaker 1: motivated so you can be disciplined. You gotta get more evaded.

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Speaker 1: I don't know. I have definitely you have to be

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Speaker 1: discipline on top. Yeast. WHO has discipline? Who? I love her?

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Speaker 1: I don't know. I love her. beyonce. Oh girl, don't

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Speaker 1: do that, don't do that, don't do that, don't even bend.

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Speaker 1: You her name. Don't put that kind of pressure on us.

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Speaker 1: Don't be that. First of all, that's that's not I

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Speaker 1: don't know. It was a lot to live up to.

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Speaker 1: It's like saying, Obama, I can't really deal with that,

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Speaker 1: that that kind of pressure. Know, I'm sorry, Michelle, Obama,

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Speaker 1: waking up before in the morning. Wait, you know, doing

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Speaker 1: your workout like every day forward. That's why you look

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Speaker 1: so also, you know, I refused to compare myself to

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Speaker 1: exceptionalism that is absolutely fueled by wealth and privilege. Thank you.

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Speaker 1: I am not comparing myself. I'm just saying there's a

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Speaker 1: lot of things. Actually, there's a lot of things that

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Speaker 1: led that woman to be that. That's not to take away.

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Speaker 1: This is not to take that woman. Okay, first of all,

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Speaker 1: you know who named somebody beyonce, somebody who last name

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Speaker 1: is beyonce. Yea, that's her last name. Is Actual family names.

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Speaker 1: Her maiden name is beyonce, because that's amazing to me.

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Speaker 1: I'm here for it, but I get it. But but honestly,

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Speaker 1: still like it's very much like giving you're gonna be

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Speaker 1: a thing to the discipline started a long time ago, parents,

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Speaker 1: you know, and making sure that starts and in high

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Speaker 1: heels and dancing and running in hills, you know. Like

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Speaker 1: I feel like discipline is something that starts really early

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Speaker 1: rather than something that you naturally just pick up. You

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Speaker 1: know how people go into the military and get get disciplined.

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Speaker 1: I feel like if Mama Joyce was on the line,

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Speaker 1: she might be like, but I instilled some discipline in

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Speaker 1: you for certain lives flies, but you had at least

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Speaker 1: make up your bed before you left that room. You had.

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Speaker 1: I don't necessarily know that that was that was disciplined

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Speaker 1: in fact, let's to keep it all the way gully.

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Speaker 1: The only chores that I really had to do was

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Speaker 1: I did I did the base boards, but I love

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Speaker 1: doing the base boards. I did the base boards and

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Speaker 1: I and I cleaned the porch. Those were two things

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Speaker 1: that I love to do. So it wasn't like, it

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Speaker 1: wasn't punishment and it wasn't necessarily disciplined. I was like,

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Speaker 1: the base sports are dirty and I went to work.

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Speaker 1: They didn't have to ask. Asia you hear it? Is

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Speaker 1: We get into the root of it? Do you hear this?

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Speaker 1: Did You am hearing the roots? Did you have chores?

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Speaker 1: A what did your Um? I definitely had chores. However,

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Speaker 1: my sister and I are seven years apart, so I

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Speaker 1: really kind of had two mothers. So I had a

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Speaker 1: lot less to do than my sister did. So I

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Speaker 1: came into kind of a certain discipline later. So, in

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Speaker 1: comparison to my sister, always was way less discipline than

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Speaker 1: she and we still are. We're still the sway. So

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Speaker 1: I do think some precedents. So, Oh, I did have

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Speaker 1: to make my bed up. Don't get me wrong, my

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Speaker 1: mother was that was something that my mom did not tolerate.

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Speaker 1: But here's the thing when I got to be a teenager,

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Speaker 1: something that I got in trouble for all the time

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Speaker 1: was my bedroom, right, we all I mean, that was

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Speaker 1: a big deal. My mother. My mother actually came to

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Speaker 1: visit me as an adult and was just like, oh,

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Speaker 1: are we making up bes daily now? Okay, oh, that's cute,

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Speaker 1: that's nice, that's nice. I think. You know what? I think?

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Speaker 1: I got disciplined. I got boot camp discipline. It's I

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Speaker 1: became a mother and it was like I became a

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Speaker 1: mother and then I became a mother again and then again,

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Speaker 1: and then it was just like, if you're not disciplined

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Speaker 1: under those circumstances, it's gonna be chaos, but they'll be

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Speaker 1: K I anyway. But I don't know. This me trying

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Speaker 1: to discover discipline and motivation at this moment in my

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Speaker 1: life has proven to be quite difficult, specifically if I'm

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Speaker 1: having to be disciplined or motivated for myself. Yeah, there

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Speaker 1: you go, there you go, because y'are not putting itself.

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Speaker 1: If I have to write, if I have to walk,

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Speaker 1: if I have to you know, any of that. It's

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Speaker 1: gotten progressively more challenging the older I get, because I'm,

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Speaker 1: you know, I might at some point. That should be cool.

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Speaker 1: I really want to go to the lake. You know,

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Speaker 1: let's go to the lake. I don't have a lake.

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Speaker 1: You know. People are waiting on me, you know. So

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Speaker 1: that's the that's the hard part, and I want to

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Speaker 1: give them what they what they need now. I want

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Speaker 1: to give them what they need, but I also need stuff,

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Speaker 1: you know. I need to take the walk, I need

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Speaker 1: a peace of mind, I need to take the nap,

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Speaker 1: I need to you know, Um, being around some musicians,

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Speaker 1: it kind of just hang out with no particular way

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Speaker 1: to go, you know, like my needs. I feel like

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Speaker 1: I've gotten stronger and the discipline is kind of running

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Speaker 1: away from me and I need I need to to

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Speaker 1: after that more real talk after the break. Here's a thought.

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Speaker 1: There was a time, and even in some countries outside

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Speaker 1: of this particular one, where life itself is a lot

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Speaker 1: less centered around like tasks, trying to be successful. There

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Speaker 1: was once upon a time, even in this country, where

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Speaker 1: to be fifty years old was to be retired, to

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Speaker 1: be not working, to not have to to to be

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Speaker 1: moving into the leisure season of one's life. I'm living America,

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Speaker 1: I'm an American. I feel the same way, anytime you

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Speaker 1: sit for a certain amount of time and you get

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Speaker 1: that guilty feeling like I could be you know, you

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Speaker 1: could be doing something else, like it's an American thing.

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Speaker 1: It's American pressures, American pressures. It's like this exceptionalism craziness,

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Speaker 1: like we just gotta be jumping out, like I blame

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Speaker 1: did it, and Steve Harvey too, because he don't. And

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Speaker 1: Steve Harvey and Ryan CCREST. And I don't need all

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Speaker 1: the money either. I don't need all of it. I

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Speaker 1: need some, I could, I could go with some more,

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Speaker 1: but I don't need all of it and I don't

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Speaker 1: and I'm not interested in working myself to lunacy. Like

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Speaker 1: I don't know what Andre Three stacks is doing today,

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Speaker 1: but I don't. Is Free, mazing. He is so free

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Speaker 1: off somewhere, girl. He walking around with a flute. He

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Speaker 1: don't give a funk. He's wearing overalls. We know he's

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Speaker 1: wearing overalls. Girl. He's not dyeing his hair. No, he

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Speaker 1: is not cutting this girl, freedom. Something about that thing

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Speaker 1: is just it's right and all exciting. So maybe what

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Speaker 1: you're doing, so maybe what you're doing is not having

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Speaker 1: a lack of discipline. Maybe what you're doing is an

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Speaker 1: act of resistance. What's gonna words? That's my friend with

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Speaker 1: the words. You know, I love it because, look, just

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Speaker 1: trying to find peace with that, like really trying to

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Speaker 1: find peace with that. My kid is thirteen. I really

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Speaker 1: like being around him, you know, I know, and I

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Speaker 1: know the time is short, you know, Um, obviously I

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Speaker 1: don't know how long I got, but I like him

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Speaker 1: and he likes you, so that's cool. He does like

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Speaker 1: it's so fun. But that means, you know, we literally

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Speaker 1: have about five years before, you know, he starts making

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Speaker 1: major life decisions and they and according to him, he

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Speaker 1: wants to go to school. He wants to go to

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Speaker 1: school in Paris, and I'm like, Oh, you know, this

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Speaker 1: is what happens when you do it. They love it

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Speaker 1: because they're supposed to. Yeah, yeah, global citizens. Yeah, I mean. Now,

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Speaker 1: don't get it twisted, Jill as, you're happiness revelation for

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Speaker 1: everybody else that's under fifty. Now you're airing this ship. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: I'm just joking. I'm not mad at that, because I

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Speaker 1: would have said that to me at thirty five. And

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Speaker 1: hold up, we gotta do the Asia. Two Lens. Who

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Speaker 1: is to tell one where, how they have worked hard,

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Speaker 1: how hard they have worked and when they should stop.

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Speaker 1: If they have worked and when, and why should one

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Speaker 1: work that's so hard in life? Should you not enjoy it?

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Speaker 1: I'm trying to do with all the lenses. I mean,

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Speaker 1: I just look at like this, right, even though I

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Speaker 1: when I said consider that I would saying consider that

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Speaker 1: at one point fifty was an Asian in which people

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Speaker 1: quote time. Now I want to circle back. Now we

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Speaker 1: all know the act of retirement and the idea of

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Speaker 1: the workforce and how long you work and when you

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Speaker 1: get to relax is, you know, basically for the white

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Speaker 1: this is not some black people have always worked. They

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Speaker 1: worked until they were older. They worked, you know, and

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Speaker 1: then we have some black folks that definitely fit into

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Speaker 1: the kind of middle class framework and yes, they dive retired.

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Speaker 1: We know some of them were related to some of

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Speaker 1: but for the most part, as a group of people

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Speaker 1: in this country, we've always worked through every generation, all

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Speaker 1: our lives. We've always technically Asian that we deserve to

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Speaker 1: rest more than anybody based is. This is why you see, oh,

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Speaker 1: that's it. Did I really did say that? That That that's

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Speaker 1: what was gonna you did? You said what I was

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Speaker 1: from the say. HMM, so, yeah, this vacation is on

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Speaker 1: the back of our ancestors. They paid for this, they

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Speaker 1: paid blood sweat. I don't think. I don't think she'll

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Speaker 1: mind me sing is um at all. I have a girlfriend, Um,

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Speaker 1: that I love so much and she's really successful now.

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Speaker 1: A couple of years ago she took off, either it

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Speaker 1: was a year or two years, just to do yoga. Oh,

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Speaker 1: in one place, or did she move around? I'm not

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Speaker 1: really sure how the how it went down, but she

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Speaker 1: saved enough money so that she could do what she

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Speaker 1: wanted to do, eat how she wanted to eat and,

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Speaker 1: you know, travel if she needed to. Not so much

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Speaker 1: wanted to, but needed to. and Um and you just

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Speaker 1: did yoga. I wonder, how connected to mind, body and spirit.

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Speaker 1: And then she came back swaring and swinging and I'm

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Speaker 1: like that's that sounds so lovely. I think that goes

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Speaker 1: into the thought of how does one become motivated and

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Speaker 1: disciplined about the right things? Is it? Are you motivating

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Speaker 1: disciplined about your own self, love, care, existence, evolution? What

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Speaker 1: are you dedicating this discipline too? You just poured warm

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Speaker 1: but on all my soul. You really you just you

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Speaker 1: just massided it in. I feel so much better, like,

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Speaker 1: Oh my God, I love Y'All. Welcome to the PODCAST. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: as I as I recorded from the corner of my

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Speaker 1: messy bedroom, out the right things for you, individual league,

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Speaker 1: as an individual. Huh, because ain't nobody I wanted you

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Speaker 1: anybody complaining about your your messy area of the bedroom.

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Speaker 1: It's just it's you right, no, nobody in mind. And

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Speaker 1: I feel like, as long as I keep the rest

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Speaker 1: of the house as it should be, quote unquote, you know,

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Speaker 1: where it's not a bunch of stuff laying around and

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Speaker 1: things are clean, you know what I mean? Like nobody's embarrassed,

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Speaker 1: you know, they walk into the house, they're like, Oh,

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Speaker 1: it smells so nice, like I like that. I like

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Speaker 1: smelly good, you know. But my side of the room

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Speaker 1: is kind of like, you know, it's half written, half

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Speaker 1: half song. have read. I went and searching. I checked

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Speaker 1: out Forbes, for this is nine powerful ways to cultivate

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Speaker 1: extreme self discipline, because, you know, beyonce is real, she's

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Speaker 1: actually exists. Like, what the Hell, how do I? How

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Speaker 1: do I change myself for the best? Now, if we're

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Speaker 1: talking about what's best for me personally, right, what you

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Speaker 1: need to do first, and then you could take you know,

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Speaker 1: put your seatbelt on first. Go ahead, yes and no.

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Speaker 1: I'm just saying that now that I realized what this,

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Speaker 1: this this self discipline and motivation, is really about. Like,

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Speaker 1: the goal is joy, Goddamnit, the goal is joy. Right. So,

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Speaker 1: and I would say this is not motivated, quote unquote,

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Speaker 1: or discipline, because those things are part of of of

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Speaker 1: a society or or part of a community. That's really

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Speaker 1: it's not really for you. It's joy looking forward to

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Speaker 1: those things. I love this ship right here. Um, here's

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Speaker 1: a step one. Know your strengths and weaknesses. We all

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Speaker 1: have weaknesses, whether they're the desire for alcohol, tobacco, unhealthy food,

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Speaker 1: obsession over social media, video games, blah, blah, blah, um,

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Speaker 1: they all have a similar effect on us. Weaknesses don't

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Speaker 1: just come in the form of areas where we lack

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Speaker 1: self control either. We all have our strong suits and

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Speaker 1: the stuff we kind of stick at, stink at. For example,

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Speaker 1: don't care for having difficult conversations, lengthy paperwork that involves

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Speaker 1: digging up old documents. Um, I don't like that. Um. So,

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Speaker 1: you know, I have somebody that helps me out with

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Speaker 1: those things because I don't want to do that, okay,

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Speaker 1: and I avoid those activities because I don't want to

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Speaker 1: do them. So that means I have to have a

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Speaker 1: lifestyle where I can pay somebody to do those particular activities,

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Speaker 1: and then what I do have to do is look

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Speaker 1: over it and make sure that I'm comfortable with the

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Speaker 1: decisions that have been made on my behalf. Okay, Um,

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Speaker 1: so that was no, your strengths and your weaknesses. So

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Speaker 1: I know that I don't really like to work out,

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Speaker 1: but I do like to play a silly game of

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Speaker 1: a tag, you know, playing football, catching the ball, running

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Speaker 1: around with it, like riding a bike, especially at night,

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Speaker 1: because I like to look in people's houses. I'm just

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Speaker 1: saying my own personal strength, because you live around the folks. So, yeah,

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Speaker 1: I want to see what they do. In love. I

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Speaker 1: just want to say what y'all doing, and I love that.

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Speaker 1: You said you don't like to work out, but you

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Speaker 1: just named all the all of the workout things, like

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Speaker 1: running with the ball and riding a bike, and it's

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Speaker 1: the word. What she's saying is that, you know, the tradition,

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Speaker 1: not traditional. Some people have a vision in their mind

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Speaker 1: of what working out is. Yeah, and she's not into that.

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Speaker 1: I feel you. That's not my scrump being in the

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Speaker 1: gym like that. That's not that's not a love for me. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: you know, but I do like riding a bike and

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Speaker 1: I do like riding a stationary bike, but I also

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Speaker 1: have to be my check a movie. Damn that. You

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Speaker 1: get your workout in if you're watching a movie by

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Speaker 1: riding a stationary bike. Ship talks. That's like my point. Oh,

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Speaker 1: that's actually pretty cool. That is actually pretty cool. That's

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Speaker 1: a good idea. Wait A, Dude. I have discipline, though,

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Speaker 1: but I'm at least I I you know, going through

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Speaker 1: this one point at a time, knowing your strength and

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Speaker 1: weight and weaknesses. Okay, step two, remove temptation. MM HMM. Okay,

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Speaker 1: like the saying, goes out of sight, out of mind.

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Speaker 1: I have to move the weed. I have to move

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Speaker 1: the weed from out of my sightline. Oh, so here's

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Speaker 1: a little discipline, and I teach my my young, my

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Speaker 1: young smokers and stoner's out there who you know, you know,

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Speaker 1: because sometimes you've got to be self disciplined. So my

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Speaker 1: thing is, at the very least, wait until after five

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Speaker 1: to smoke, right, and so when all your business is done,

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Speaker 1: but also don't have that ship like in your visual site,

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Speaker 1: because at any given time, on a stressful phone call

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Speaker 1: or something, you're gonna get triggered and you're gonna want

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Speaker 1: to hit that ship. So make sure that you keep

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Speaker 1: your marijuana stored in the place out of your eyeline eyesight.

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Speaker 1: That will help you with that discipline. Sorry. No, I

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Speaker 1: appreciate that. We'll be back after the break. Whether I'm

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Speaker 1: not sure. This is discipline and that's you know, let's

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Speaker 1: start there. I just know that this is kind of

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Speaker 1: how I try to move through my life. Is, Um,

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Speaker 1: I try to incorporate a little bit of work and

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Speaker 1: a little bit of leisure in every single day so

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Speaker 1: that I'm kind of start a lifestyle change to where,

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Speaker 1: like I'm it's a rhythm that I get into where

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Speaker 1: I'm like, okay, I know that each part of my

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Speaker 1: day is going to involve accomplishing something towards the goal,

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Speaker 1: but also taking care of myself, because I feel like

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Speaker 1: the start stop never really works for me. If I

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Speaker 1: just say, Oh, today I'm taking care of myself, the

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Speaker 1: next day I'm feeling drained again and then it's like

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Speaker 1: it's not like I'm I feel like I'm not filling

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Speaker 1: up this reserve bucket of care like that I could

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Speaker 1: just pull from that bucket because I filled it up,

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Speaker 1: you know, yesterday or the day before. I feel like

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Speaker 1: I have to be in this kind of constant rhythm

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Speaker 1: with it, and I'm like that with work too. I'm

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Speaker 1: that way with goals also. I have to consistently be

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Speaker 1: doing something towards that goal on a daily basis or

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Speaker 1: I will walk away from it, I will get distracted

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Speaker 1: by just the sheer volume of responsibilities that I have

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Speaker 1: and it's just nothing I can do about that. They're

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Speaker 1: not gonna go anywhere, they're just going to evolve. At

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Speaker 1: one point I thought, oh well, when my kids get

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Speaker 1: this age, Oh, then they got that age and then

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Speaker 1: they had different needs. Oh well, when I go this

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Speaker 1: or when I'm off, when it's the summer. Oh, but

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Speaker 1: then the summer brings a whole another kind of you know,

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Speaker 1: Um Business and whatever it brings. So I just realized

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Speaker 1: I'm never going to get to you know, that moment

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Speaker 1: that's perfect for anything, whether it's a task that's about

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Speaker 1: work or one that's about my own self preservation. I

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Speaker 1: just kind of have to be consistently engaged. I don't

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Speaker 1: know how smart that is, because sometimes you don't need

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Speaker 1: to be engaged in anything. See that. Then number two

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Speaker 1: doesn't necessarily work for everybody, because when it says remove temptations,

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Speaker 1: your temptations are seven people. I cannot remove them. That

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Speaker 1: needs stuff and and want your eyes on them. You

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Speaker 1: can't remove your temptations in that way, except if you

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Speaker 1: were to take a particular day and disappear for the

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Speaker 1: day or a particular time of day, though, Jill, because

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Speaker 1: that's what age is saying. Like well, I will say this.

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Speaker 1: It's a particular time of the day. If I say

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Speaker 1: to the children, I've taken to saying this to them

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Speaker 1: quite a bit, I'll say, Hey, the office is closed,

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Speaker 1: the office closes at certain times. I deal with office

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Speaker 1: hours with the kids, because I realized, like, if I'm

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Speaker 1: not if I'm not being whoa disciplined about how I

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Speaker 1: allowed them to engage with me, then nobody's gonna no

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Speaker 1: one's gonna respect the boundary. I'M gonna be on, the

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Speaker 1: green light is gonna be on. Come on in. From

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Speaker 1: the moment I opened my eyes to the moment that

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Speaker 1: I closed them. I'm available. So I have to say, yeah,

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Speaker 1: at this time, we're done, man, you know, and I

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Speaker 1: just started doing that, and that's because the change in

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Speaker 1: the kids needs. Now it's not about changing diapers or

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Speaker 1: making sure they have a lunch box. Now it's like

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Speaker 1: I have a serious, like emotional issue that I'm dealing with.

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Speaker 1: I have a serious life decision to make. I am

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Speaker 1: you know, all of these things are starting to get

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Speaker 1: more complicated and you don't have to have kids feel

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Speaker 1: that too, and removing those things. I was just thinking.

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Speaker 1: I was like, first, some of the multi hyphen it's

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Speaker 1: out there to people who got multiple gigs and they

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00:24:37,920 --> 00:24:39,480
Speaker 1: devote some of their so much of their time the

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Speaker 1: other things. That's why I say it's a time of day.

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Speaker 1: It's like a couple. I was talking to some some

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Speaker 1: folks the other day and we were like, we need

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Speaker 1: to take two hours a day, whether it be early

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Speaker 1: in the morning, but this is your time now, nobody

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Speaker 1: else's time, and that's whether you've got kids, jobs or

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Speaker 1: parents that are older that's gonna be calling and breaking

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Speaker 1: you up the first thing in the morning. You got

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Speaker 1: to let them know. Sometimes you gotta just let folks

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Speaker 1: know these are my hours, or just put your phone on,

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00:25:04,200 --> 00:25:05,879
Speaker 1: do not disturb if you don't want to, think nobody.

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00:25:05,960 --> 00:25:09,280
Speaker 1: Oh I love that. Oh I love that. Everybody. Please

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00:25:09,280 --> 00:25:12,280
Speaker 1: hold onto that one that do not disturb on that phone,

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00:25:13,200 --> 00:25:16,560
Speaker 1: hm to, just to give yourself some time and a break.

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Speaker 1: And if you do it every day, you know that

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Speaker 1: is what that's discipline. M Hm Yo. Can I tell Y'all,

400
00:25:23,640 --> 00:25:26,120
Speaker 1: speaking of discipline, a girlfriend I went to an industry event.

401
00:25:26,200 --> 00:25:28,639
Speaker 1: She's in the TV industry, and she was talking to

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00:25:28,680 --> 00:25:31,359
Speaker 1: a dude she had just Matt and think about this

403
00:25:31,400 --> 00:25:34,720
Speaker 1: for discipline. They're talking and and all of a sudden

404
00:25:34,720 --> 00:25:37,280
Speaker 1: his phone goes off and he says, Oh, my timer

405
00:25:37,359 --> 00:25:38,679
Speaker 1: just went off. I think I told you all this.

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00:25:39,080 --> 00:25:41,680
Speaker 1: My timer just went off. This is usually when I

407
00:25:41,720 --> 00:25:43,639
Speaker 1: cut conversation short because I have a timer so I

408
00:25:43,640 --> 00:25:46,200
Speaker 1: don't be talking for too much to one person. Um,

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00:25:46,200 --> 00:25:48,159
Speaker 1: but I'm enjoying this conversation, so I'm going to let

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00:25:48,200 --> 00:25:53,760
Speaker 1: the timer go. I'm partially scared, like I'm I'm, I'm

411
00:25:53,800 --> 00:25:56,920
Speaker 1: I'm an intrigue, but I'm also like, who, what's that?

412
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Speaker 1: I mean, it's it's a boundary. It's that's a boundary.

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00:26:05,359 --> 00:26:09,400
Speaker 1: I gotta respect that. Who knows why he implemented it. Also,

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00:26:10,400 --> 00:26:13,000
Speaker 1: I think he was managing his time. He was managing

415
00:26:13,000 --> 00:26:18,720
Speaker 1: his time and being productive with his time in his mind, like. So, yeah,

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00:26:18,920 --> 00:26:22,760
Speaker 1: so I don't know, that doesn't work for me because

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00:26:22,800 --> 00:26:27,280
Speaker 1: I would feel that that was slightly rigid. But look,

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00:26:27,320 --> 00:26:30,320
Speaker 1: I just started an interesting way to keep your discipline

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00:26:30,560 --> 00:26:34,120
Speaker 1: and to keep your life regimented, and not energies as well,

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00:26:34,520 --> 00:26:38,800
Speaker 1: and manage energies outside energies, because that's a big thing too.

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00:26:38,800 --> 00:26:41,280
Speaker 1: Write like I mean to be honest. We do live

422
00:26:41,280 --> 00:26:44,239
Speaker 1: in a time period where we are interacting with a

423
00:26:44,359 --> 00:26:49,280
Speaker 1: lot of people, you know, and maybe generations before us

424
00:26:49,400 --> 00:26:53,360
Speaker 1: just didn't have to interact so much, and we do,

425
00:26:53,480 --> 00:26:57,560
Speaker 1: whether it's digitally or whether it's in person. We're interacting

426
00:26:57,600 --> 00:27:00,600
Speaker 1: with hell of people. So I can understand that maybe

427
00:27:00,840 --> 00:27:03,040
Speaker 1: maybe in this time period, this day and age, that

428
00:27:03,040 --> 00:27:07,240
Speaker 1: that's a necessary boundary, right, even a phone call, even

429
00:27:07,320 --> 00:27:08,800
Speaker 1: if you do that, you know, in your day, and

430
00:27:08,800 --> 00:27:10,359
Speaker 1: I'm not saying I'm not suggesting this to people, but

431
00:27:10,400 --> 00:27:13,400
Speaker 1: I'm just giving examples of how people have their own

432
00:27:13,400 --> 00:27:16,440
Speaker 1: ways of control and discipline and control in their life

433
00:27:16,480 --> 00:27:19,760
Speaker 1: so that it doesn't, you know, overwhelm them. Like even

434
00:27:20,240 --> 00:27:26,040
Speaker 1: phone calls I'm sorry, Jill, back to your list. Fair enough, yeah, fair,

435
00:27:26,160 --> 00:27:30,439
Speaker 1: fair enough. Step step three here, according to Forbes, is

436
00:27:30,960 --> 00:27:35,760
Speaker 1: to set clear goals and have an execution plan. If

437
00:27:35,800 --> 00:27:38,639
Speaker 1: you hope to achieve greater degrees of self discipline, you

438
00:27:38,720 --> 00:27:42,080
Speaker 1: must have a clear vision of what you hope to accomplish.

439
00:27:42,520 --> 00:27:45,560
Speaker 1: Just like any goal, you must also have an understanding

440
00:27:45,640 --> 00:27:52,400
Speaker 1: of what success means to you. Remember that, organize. That's

441
00:27:52,880 --> 00:27:58,120
Speaker 1: that's important. Yes, it's like I feel like we talked

442
00:27:58,119 --> 00:28:00,159
Speaker 1: about in the show, like what success means to you.

443
00:28:01,040 --> 00:28:03,760
Speaker 1: When I when I talked about my rhythm, when I

444
00:28:03,800 --> 00:28:06,639
Speaker 1: get up in the morning, I decide what are you

445
00:28:06,640 --> 00:28:09,080
Speaker 1: going to accomplish today, and I kind of try to

446
00:28:09,080 --> 00:28:12,199
Speaker 1: stick to that rather than what I would typically do

447
00:28:12,359 --> 00:28:15,080
Speaker 1: is let the day dictate and then I would add

448
00:28:15,119 --> 00:28:17,639
Speaker 1: things on and add things on and then, before you

449
00:28:17,680 --> 00:28:19,720
Speaker 1: know what, I didn't accomplish any of the things because

450
00:28:19,720 --> 00:28:23,800
Speaker 1: I have too many things going on. One I'm feeling frustrated, blah, blah,

451
00:28:23,800 --> 00:28:27,879
Speaker 1: Blah Blah. Now I'm like, yeah, I'm doing this today,

452
00:28:28,480 --> 00:28:31,080
Speaker 1: like nothing else is getting done. This is getting done

453
00:28:31,119 --> 00:28:34,879
Speaker 1: today because I feel like at least I can go

454
00:28:34,920 --> 00:28:36,520
Speaker 1: to bed that night and say I said what I

455
00:28:36,560 --> 00:28:38,800
Speaker 1: was gonna do. I made a goal. I've reached that

456
00:28:38,840 --> 00:28:42,960
Speaker 1: particular goal and for me it's micro goals because my

457
00:28:43,000 --> 00:28:46,880
Speaker 1: personality functions better with that. I get overwhelmed if I'm

458
00:28:46,880 --> 00:28:49,480
Speaker 1: thinking too far in the future, and I think also

459
00:28:49,560 --> 00:28:52,000
Speaker 1: that has to do with with I think that has

460
00:28:52,040 --> 00:28:54,560
Speaker 1: to do also do with having children, because kids are

461
00:28:54,600 --> 00:28:58,120
Speaker 1: so unpredictable. You'll have a plan or something you're trying

462
00:28:58,160 --> 00:28:59,920
Speaker 1: to do and they will come and throw a monkey

463
00:29:00,000 --> 00:29:06,400
Speaker 1: mentioned that beach. So fast, so fast, so fast. Yeah,

464
00:29:06,400 --> 00:29:08,400
Speaker 1: I was out the other day taking care of something

465
00:29:08,440 --> 00:29:10,200
Speaker 1: that I had to take care of. I said this

466
00:29:10,280 --> 00:29:12,520
Speaker 1: was on my list for the day. I got a

467
00:29:12,520 --> 00:29:15,200
Speaker 1: phone call from the school and it was like Lana's

468
00:29:15,240 --> 00:29:17,440
Speaker 1: eyes swollen and she needs you to pick up and

469
00:29:17,480 --> 00:29:20,840
Speaker 1: the nurse Ain't there, and I'm like what the what?

470
00:29:21,000 --> 00:29:22,840
Speaker 1: And I had to stop. You know, it's that kind

471
00:29:22,840 --> 00:29:27,520
Speaker 1: of you know, monkey wrench. Yep, easy to do. But

472
00:29:27,560 --> 00:29:29,720
Speaker 1: what I did do in that situation was called my

473
00:29:29,800 --> 00:29:33,200
Speaker 1: child and say, is this an emergency? It wasn't. I

474
00:29:33,240 --> 00:29:35,000
Speaker 1: said I have to finish what I'm doing right now.

475
00:29:36,600 --> 00:29:39,400
Speaker 1: I'm gonna Finish that and as soon as I'm done

476
00:29:39,400 --> 00:29:41,640
Speaker 1: with that, I will come directly to pick you up.

477
00:29:42,880 --> 00:29:46,600
Speaker 1: DISC so discipline. I was proud of my my myself too.

478
00:29:46,760 --> 00:29:49,760
Speaker 1: I said I was going to clean my kitchen yesterday.

479
00:29:49,800 --> 00:29:53,160
Speaker 1: I meant not just clean the kitchen, I meant go

480
00:29:53,320 --> 00:29:58,080
Speaker 1: through the cabinets, clean out whatever clutter and dust is there,

481
00:29:58,600 --> 00:30:03,040
Speaker 1: go through and and organized my glasses and you know, Um,

482
00:30:03,080 --> 00:30:05,520
Speaker 1: I put the little fuzzy stuff at the bottom of

483
00:30:05,560 --> 00:30:08,120
Speaker 1: the things so my pants don't get all scratched up.

484
00:30:08,400 --> 00:30:11,480
Speaker 1: You know what I mean. I organized more so than

485
00:30:11,720 --> 00:30:14,560
Speaker 1: I'm I'm I know what I said. I said clean,

486
00:30:14,640 --> 00:30:18,960
Speaker 1: but it was really organizing my kitchen. And when I

487
00:30:19,000 --> 00:30:21,720
Speaker 1: was done and it, and it took me about a

488
00:30:21,800 --> 00:30:26,560
Speaker 1: good three hours, I listened to some good music and

489
00:30:26,800 --> 00:30:32,600
Speaker 1: even though the man and the boy wanted to continuously

490
00:30:32,720 --> 00:30:36,720
Speaker 1: pull me away from what I was doing, I didn't

491
00:30:36,760 --> 00:30:40,200
Speaker 1: allow it, even though I was interested in what they

492
00:30:40,240 --> 00:30:43,080
Speaker 1: were talking about and interested in what they wanted to

493
00:30:43,560 --> 00:30:47,000
Speaker 1: share and show, I just didn't do it. And then

494
00:30:47,000 --> 00:30:50,080
Speaker 1: there was a little moment of tense because I'm like,

495
00:30:50,120 --> 00:30:52,440
Speaker 1: all I said was and almost like yeah, I got

496
00:30:52,480 --> 00:30:55,480
Speaker 1: that part, but I'm I can't do this. I have

497
00:30:55,560 --> 00:30:58,640
Speaker 1: to do this thing right now. And I felt really

498
00:30:58,640 --> 00:31:01,000
Speaker 1: great about it. And when I came downstairs this morning,

499
00:31:01,080 --> 00:31:04,040
Speaker 1: I looked in in the kitchen, I was like yeah,

500
00:31:04,200 --> 00:31:07,720
Speaker 1: I opened the drawers and I was like yeah, that

501
00:31:08,760 --> 00:31:12,680
Speaker 1: like yeah, and so I get what you're saying, like

502
00:31:13,560 --> 00:31:19,239
Speaker 1: micro dosing when it comes to Um Your Chore, you know,

503
00:31:19,360 --> 00:31:21,480
Speaker 1: or with the thing that you're trying to get accomplished.

504
00:31:22,160 --> 00:31:25,640
Speaker 1: I get that. Okay, okay, closer. Yeah, I feel better

505
00:31:25,680 --> 00:31:28,240
Speaker 1: about myself than when I'm like I gotta do this, this, this, this,

506
00:31:28,240 --> 00:31:31,480
Speaker 1: this into for me. Sometimes you gotta write that ship down. So, y'all,

507
00:31:31,480 --> 00:31:33,480
Speaker 1: I had to go get me a white board. Got

508
00:31:33,480 --> 00:31:37,600
Speaker 1: Me a white on that white board fold categories on it.

509
00:31:37,600 --> 00:31:41,760
Speaker 1: It's a J I L Q l as loving grit

510
00:31:42,000 --> 00:31:45,880
Speaker 1: and LAIA's world. Yes, and once in that feeling of

511
00:31:45,920 --> 00:31:50,280
Speaker 1: actually taking your marker and scratching through something that feels

512
00:31:50,320 --> 00:31:51,800
Speaker 1: so good. At least if you could scratch through, you

513
00:31:51,840 --> 00:31:58,560
Speaker 1: a good three things on that white board. Just erase it. Yeah, winning, progress, winning.

514
00:31:59,360 --> 00:32:02,720
Speaker 1: Thank you. Oh, I got one, y'all, I got one.

515
00:32:03,000 --> 00:32:12,760
Speaker 1: I got one. I got one. I'm delegating responsibility learning.

516
00:32:13,080 --> 00:32:15,479
Speaker 1: That's that's about forty year old ship right there. Now,

517
00:32:15,560 --> 00:32:17,800
Speaker 1: now you're talking about some delegation that's on the list.

518
00:32:17,880 --> 00:32:20,840
Speaker 1: That's on the list, that's on the list. Oh Nice,

519
00:32:21,240 --> 00:32:24,120
Speaker 1: oh good. Okay. Well, I know that we we talked

520
00:32:24,120 --> 00:32:26,240
Speaker 1: about you know, there's certain things that I don't really

521
00:32:26,280 --> 00:32:30,120
Speaker 1: like to do and you're saying your list like there's

522
00:32:30,160 --> 00:32:32,000
Speaker 1: certain things I just don't I don't want to be

523
00:32:32,080 --> 00:32:34,560
Speaker 1: I don't want to know your strength and your weaknesses.

524
00:32:35,080 --> 00:32:38,600
Speaker 1: What are my strengths and weaknesses? What I'm saying is

525
00:32:38,640 --> 00:32:42,360
Speaker 1: that not necessarily based on your strengths and weaknesses. I'm

526
00:32:42,400 --> 00:32:47,320
Speaker 1: talking about sometimes time opportunity, sometimes also to benefiting from

527
00:32:47,480 --> 00:32:50,880
Speaker 1: things that other people can do that, whether it's your

528
00:32:50,920 --> 00:32:54,000
Speaker 1: strength or not, maybe it's they need to do it

529
00:32:54,080 --> 00:32:56,720
Speaker 1: so you can do something else right, and not trying

530
00:32:56,760 --> 00:32:59,440
Speaker 1: to be every woman. Not trying to be every woman,

531
00:32:59,560 --> 00:33:02,360
Speaker 1: because the thing is like, yes, I am by far

532
00:33:02,680 --> 00:33:06,880
Speaker 1: the best organizer and cleaner rupper in this house. The

533
00:33:06,920 --> 00:33:10,120
Speaker 1: thing is that I'm not gonna always be the person

534
00:33:10,160 --> 00:33:12,360
Speaker 1: to take on that. This happened today. I had a

535
00:33:12,400 --> 00:33:16,120
Speaker 1: GIG yesterday. I came home from my Gig this Um

536
00:33:16,120 --> 00:33:18,800
Speaker 1: with about an hour and a half to prepare for this.

537
00:33:19,760 --> 00:33:23,360
Speaker 1: When I came in the house, my house was not acceptable. Now,

538
00:33:23,400 --> 00:33:27,040
Speaker 1: typically what I would do is. Okay, let me just

539
00:33:27,080 --> 00:33:28,680
Speaker 1: get this together, because I know I can do it

540
00:33:28,800 --> 00:33:30,560
Speaker 1: quickly and it's gonna look the way I wanted to

541
00:33:30,600 --> 00:33:33,360
Speaker 1: look when I'm done. I know I can get this

542
00:33:33,400 --> 00:33:35,440
Speaker 1: done in the in the a lot of time. And

543
00:33:35,480 --> 00:33:40,040
Speaker 1: I stopped myself and I said no, no, no, no, no, everybody,

544
00:33:40,040 --> 00:33:44,520
Speaker 1: come downstairs. You're gonna do this. You do this, you

545
00:33:44,600 --> 00:33:46,400
Speaker 1: do this, this is how this is done. I want

546
00:33:46,400 --> 00:33:49,600
Speaker 1: you to do this. This includes this, this and this.

547
00:33:50,080 --> 00:33:52,680
Speaker 1: When I tell you to clean this kitchen, that means

548
00:33:52,800 --> 00:33:56,320
Speaker 1: also mop the floor, that means also wipe down the

549
00:33:56,360 --> 00:33:59,320
Speaker 1: cabinet doors. That also means clean out the bottom of

550
00:33:59,360 --> 00:34:01,440
Speaker 1: the container day that you put the dishes in. This

551
00:34:01,480 --> 00:34:03,800
Speaker 1: is all of this means those things. So one of

552
00:34:03,840 --> 00:34:05,880
Speaker 1: the things that, even though I've taught my children to

553
00:34:05,920 --> 00:34:08,920
Speaker 1: clean up, I have teenagers. I'm sorry, I don't know

554
00:34:08,960 --> 00:34:13,439
Speaker 1: how that brain function works, but apparently you gotta tell

555
00:34:13,480 --> 00:34:16,920
Speaker 1: them fifteen thousand times to do the same thing. But

556
00:34:17,880 --> 00:34:20,400
Speaker 1: one of the things I realized too, is that, once again,

557
00:34:20,840 --> 00:34:23,160
Speaker 1: that by the time I sat down to do this,

558
00:34:24,600 --> 00:34:27,600
Speaker 1: all of that was accomplished and I didn't have to

559
00:34:27,680 --> 00:34:30,080
Speaker 1: run myself ragged to do that. And your mind could

560
00:34:30,080 --> 00:34:32,239
Speaker 1: be on reset for your what you got to do

561
00:34:32,320 --> 00:34:34,640
Speaker 1: and focus on this, that was self discipline and self

562
00:34:34,640 --> 00:34:37,239
Speaker 1: care in that moment to ages, because that's what you

563
00:34:37,280 --> 00:34:39,480
Speaker 1: needed to be prepared, because we have conversations here. We

564
00:34:39,520 --> 00:34:41,760
Speaker 1: got to you got to have your mind right settled.

565
00:34:42,520 --> 00:34:45,279
Speaker 1: I'm just saying it's better to delegate those things that

566
00:34:45,400 --> 00:34:48,160
Speaker 1: you could be absolutely and this is that. This is

567
00:34:48,200 --> 00:34:50,719
Speaker 1: all the time, though. This is so many times that

568
00:34:50,920 --> 00:34:53,560
Speaker 1: I would have taken on a responsibility in this house

569
00:34:53,920 --> 00:34:56,000
Speaker 1: because I'm used to it, because I like the way

570
00:34:56,040 --> 00:34:58,480
Speaker 1: I do it, because I do it well, when I

571
00:34:58,520 --> 00:35:02,480
Speaker 1: could have not allowed my day to be so packed

572
00:35:02,480 --> 00:35:06,920
Speaker 1: full by simply saying someone else do this, come do

573
00:35:07,080 --> 00:35:10,200
Speaker 1: this or x, Y Z. and if I didn't have children,

574
00:35:11,160 --> 00:35:14,280
Speaker 1: then I would have had to discipline myself, to hire somebody,

575
00:35:14,680 --> 00:35:17,280
Speaker 1: which to bring somebody in. These are all things that

576
00:35:17,280 --> 00:35:20,560
Speaker 1: that that are not necessarily the children involved themselves, not

577
00:35:20,600 --> 00:35:23,080
Speaker 1: because I think that my kids are laborers, but because

578
00:35:23,200 --> 00:35:25,640
Speaker 1: my children are part of a community which is my household,

579
00:35:26,120 --> 00:35:28,120
Speaker 1: and every person who is a part of the community

580
00:35:28,280 --> 00:35:32,080
Speaker 1: must contribute to the community. So I want to be

581
00:35:32,120 --> 00:35:34,520
Speaker 1: clear on that. There's an old school black parent way

582
00:35:34,560 --> 00:35:38,120
Speaker 1: of doing things that make kids labor. That's not what

583
00:35:38,200 --> 00:35:41,880
Speaker 1: I'm talking about. Come from downstairs in the basement to

584
00:35:41,960 --> 00:35:48,440
Speaker 1: hand me to promote. I hated that. I thought that

585
00:35:48,600 --> 00:35:51,440
Speaker 1: was so whack. Why you want me to open the

586
00:35:51,440 --> 00:35:54,400
Speaker 1: window you're sitting next to. Stop playing with my life.

587
00:35:54,960 --> 00:35:57,040
Speaker 1: I've only seen, I only telling at my at my

588
00:35:57,080 --> 00:35:59,239
Speaker 1: cousin's house, and I thought that I was like y'all

589
00:35:59,239 --> 00:36:03,719
Speaker 1: slaves anyway. So, but can I just say real quick

590
00:36:03,719 --> 00:36:06,719
Speaker 1: on that cleaning the house thing. On a I think

591
00:36:06,719 --> 00:36:09,279
Speaker 1: this is such an interesting time to where, like more

592
00:36:09,320 --> 00:36:11,799
Speaker 1: people are seeing that if they can afford to have

593
00:36:11,880 --> 00:36:15,360
Speaker 1: somebody come clean their spot, like this wasn't commonplace fifteen

594
00:36:15,440 --> 00:36:20,799
Speaker 1: years ago. But I just and I'm envious because I

595
00:36:20,840 --> 00:36:22,960
Speaker 1: still have not had the discipline enough to think that

596
00:36:23,000 --> 00:36:25,120
Speaker 1: my house is clean enough to have somebody come clean it,

597
00:36:25,120 --> 00:36:27,920
Speaker 1: because that's a whole another mind fuckery thing of like

598
00:36:28,040 --> 00:36:29,400
Speaker 1: I just I'm not righting to me just clean a

599
00:36:29,400 --> 00:36:33,160
Speaker 1: little bit. I'm thinking, like my house got to be

600
00:36:33,280 --> 00:36:36,239
Speaker 1: organized for somebody to clean it. That's my thing, is

601
00:36:36,280 --> 00:36:38,799
Speaker 1: like sometimes I don't feel like I'm organized enough for

602
00:36:38,880 --> 00:36:40,920
Speaker 1: somebody else to come clean it, because they're gonna be

603
00:36:40,960 --> 00:36:43,400
Speaker 1: like where does go. Where does go? They all clean

604
00:36:43,480 --> 00:36:48,480
Speaker 1: around your mess and because it's clean, you'll organize it.

605
00:36:49,000 --> 00:36:51,000
Speaker 1: I know I gotta get so that's what yeah, I'm listen,

606
00:36:51,000 --> 00:36:53,160
Speaker 1: I'm yes, yes, Jill, I know you're right. I know

607
00:36:53,200 --> 00:36:56,000
Speaker 1: what you're saying is right. They're clean around your mess

608
00:36:56,040 --> 00:36:59,279
Speaker 1: and you'll be like wow, this looks really good. Let

609
00:36:59,320 --> 00:37:02,080
Speaker 1: me organize it so the next time that they come.

610
00:37:02,880 --> 00:37:07,320
Speaker 1: You know, it gets better and better as you go along,

611
00:37:07,400 --> 00:37:08,839
Speaker 1: and that's why I wanted to shout out to people

612
00:37:08,840 --> 00:37:10,759
Speaker 1: who actually take do this kind of thing, because that's

613
00:37:10,800 --> 00:37:12,880
Speaker 1: a whole another level to me of self care, because

614
00:37:12,880 --> 00:37:14,560
Speaker 1: you know, it's like why am I doing this if

615
00:37:14,560 --> 00:37:17,239
Speaker 1: I don't have to, if I've worked hard enough that

616
00:37:17,280 --> 00:37:20,320
Speaker 1: I can pay somebody to do this. It's it's beautiful,

617
00:37:20,400 --> 00:37:23,600
Speaker 1: it's it's a beautiful treat yourself. You go treat yourself.

618
00:37:23,760 --> 00:37:25,600
Speaker 1: You're right. I'm just gonna stop playing that and think

619
00:37:25,640 --> 00:37:28,160
Speaker 1: about it. That's creating jobs because at the end of

620
00:37:28,200 --> 00:37:30,520
Speaker 1: the day, that's honest and beautiful work to come in

621
00:37:30,760 --> 00:37:35,279
Speaker 1: and make somebody's home clean and and functional. I'm sorry,

622
00:37:35,320 --> 00:37:38,720
Speaker 1: and we all know cleaning is not everybody's ministry. Amen.

623
00:37:39,160 --> 00:37:41,719
Speaker 1: Some people are just very talented at that very can

624
00:37:41,760 --> 00:37:43,040
Speaker 1: I just tell you all just now? I hate to

625
00:37:43,080 --> 00:37:45,040
Speaker 1: go down to tangent, but it gets me a little

626
00:37:45,040 --> 00:37:47,000
Speaker 1: emotional when I think about it sometimes, because I think

627
00:37:47,000 --> 00:37:50,120
Speaker 1: about all of the new ethnicities that are now cleaning

628
00:37:50,160 --> 00:37:52,239
Speaker 1: houses for a living and have businesses, and then I think,

629
00:37:52,400 --> 00:37:54,399
Speaker 1: like my grandmama used to do it like white folks

630
00:37:54,400 --> 00:37:56,440
Speaker 1: and it was a totally different thing and like not

631
00:37:56,520 --> 00:37:58,759
Speaker 1: in in these people, not knowing that she didn't get

632
00:37:58,760 --> 00:38:01,759
Speaker 1: paid her worth and how people now have been. It's

633
00:38:01,760 --> 00:38:04,240
Speaker 1: a whole mind, but that's a tangent. We're talking about

634
00:38:04,239 --> 00:38:07,840
Speaker 1: that on that the Wazoo for do not even know,

635
00:38:07,920 --> 00:38:09,640
Speaker 1: and thinking that coming to my house cleaning, thinking that

636
00:38:09,680 --> 00:38:11,200
Speaker 1: I got and may not know that my grandmother used

637
00:38:11,239 --> 00:38:13,480
Speaker 1: to do this ship for damn near free, and then

638
00:38:13,480 --> 00:38:15,920
Speaker 1: the white man didn't give give her the scraps from

639
00:38:15,960 --> 00:38:17,759
Speaker 1: their dinner table to take to her family. Like it's

640
00:38:17,760 --> 00:38:21,120
Speaker 1: a whole history of this, but that was it's interesting

641
00:38:21,120 --> 00:38:22,680
Speaker 1: about that, but shout out to all those who have

642
00:38:22,680 --> 00:38:26,600
Speaker 1: cleaning businesses now. It's word where my grandmother was a

643
00:38:26,640 --> 00:38:30,880
Speaker 1: housekeeper for then she was made right, yeah, for a

644
00:38:30,960 --> 00:38:35,919
Speaker 1: Jewish family, and they taught her. They taught her a lot,

645
00:38:35,960 --> 00:38:38,919
Speaker 1: whether they intended to or not, but she learned about

646
00:38:38,960 --> 00:38:46,880
Speaker 1: she count queen and furniture. She learned that Um quality

647
00:38:46,960 --> 00:38:50,279
Speaker 1: furniture you can't feel the bones in it. She learned

648
00:38:50,280 --> 00:38:56,080
Speaker 1: about towels, like I'm grateful what what good China is,

649
00:38:57,960 --> 00:39:00,719
Speaker 1: whether they intended on it or not, she learned quite

650
00:39:00,719 --> 00:39:03,400
Speaker 1: a bit funny, because I'm like, as we translate the experience,

651
00:39:03,400 --> 00:39:05,480
Speaker 1: and I know she translated it for you in that way,

652
00:39:05,760 --> 00:39:08,000
Speaker 1: I still say that ship wasn't all, like you said,

653
00:39:08,000 --> 00:39:10,400
Speaker 1: ships and Giggles, you know. I just this is the

654
00:39:10,440 --> 00:39:13,600
Speaker 1: first time that we're learning how to FROLIC. We're actually

655
00:39:13,640 --> 00:39:18,799
Speaker 1: having a conversation about self care and about discipline and motivation,

656
00:39:19,040 --> 00:39:21,440
Speaker 1: because most of the time it's been an effort to

657
00:39:21,520 --> 00:39:25,200
Speaker 1: stay to stay alive. Yes, and now we're able to

658
00:39:25,239 --> 00:39:29,680
Speaker 1: have some options and choices and that's a beautiful thing.

659
00:39:29,760 --> 00:39:33,480
Speaker 1: Thank you, Susie, thank you Margaret, thank you blue okay, yes, also,

660
00:39:33,600 --> 00:39:35,919
Speaker 1: now we're able to create a different type of work

661
00:39:36,000 --> 00:39:38,319
Speaker 1: environment for those people, for people who do do that work,

662
00:39:39,719 --> 00:39:43,320
Speaker 1: because we actually don't have to hire those particular new companies.

663
00:39:44,120 --> 00:39:46,439
Speaker 1: We can hire folks that we know need that type

664
00:39:46,480 --> 00:39:47,960
Speaker 1: of work and do that type of work and do

665
00:39:48,000 --> 00:39:51,440
Speaker 1: it well and create a different type of work experience

666
00:39:51,480 --> 00:39:54,200
Speaker 1: for them. For them. I'm so glad you said that.

667
00:39:54,200 --> 00:39:56,960
Speaker 1: Shout outs to my Auntie Michelle, that cleans my Mama House,

668
00:39:57,320 --> 00:39:59,399
Speaker 1: that leaves it smell on like lemon grass and coming

669
00:39:59,440 --> 00:40:00,920
Speaker 1: here with hugs and kids. He said, Oh, it's the

670
00:40:00,960 --> 00:40:05,880
Speaker 1: best feeling. Oh and yes, it's lemon grass. Lemon grass

671
00:40:05,960 --> 00:40:07,719
Speaker 1: is my set. I just need you to know that.

672
00:40:07,800 --> 00:40:11,640
Speaker 1: And Jasmine. I like stuff that smells like Cilantro. Don't

673
00:40:11,680 --> 00:40:17,200
Speaker 1: ask me the questions. Um, shout out to Lance. You know,

674
00:40:17,320 --> 00:40:20,239
Speaker 1: y'all know my my my brother. Um. Shout out to

675
00:40:20,360 --> 00:40:25,320
Speaker 1: Lance's sister, Carol Man. When I when I lived in Philly,

676
00:40:25,360 --> 00:40:27,479
Speaker 1: Carroll would come to my spot and she would clean

677
00:40:27,520 --> 00:40:33,520
Speaker 1: it with so much love. Oh my God, I love

678
00:40:33,600 --> 00:40:37,040
Speaker 1: to overtake Carol. It was just a joy. What else?

679
00:40:37,080 --> 00:40:39,799
Speaker 1: What can I do for Your Carol? What else she was?

680
00:40:39,960 --> 00:40:45,200
Speaker 1: She was wonderful. Definitely love her for that. Here's another one.

681
00:40:45,719 --> 00:40:49,480
Speaker 1: This is this is step forward. This is practice, daily diligence.

682
00:40:49,920 --> 00:40:52,239
Speaker 1: So I you know, I was saying that nobody's really

683
00:40:52,280 --> 00:40:55,279
Speaker 1: born with discipline. You you, you pick it up. Um,

684
00:40:55,320 --> 00:40:57,480
Speaker 1: somebody's gotta teach you how to do these things. But

685
00:40:57,640 --> 00:41:01,600
Speaker 1: they're saying that we aren't. We aren't born with self discipline.

686
00:41:01,800 --> 00:41:04,000
Speaker 1: It is a learned behavior. So they're saying exactly what

687
00:41:04,000 --> 00:41:06,719
Speaker 1: I'm saying. And just like any other skill you want

688
00:41:06,719 --> 00:41:11,520
Speaker 1: to master, it requires daily practice and repetition. It must

689
00:41:11,520 --> 00:41:21,720
Speaker 1: become habitual. That part daily practice. I mean yes, absolutely.

690
00:41:23,160 --> 00:41:26,840
Speaker 1: I could, you know, do the night yoga with Um

691
00:41:26,960 --> 00:41:29,759
Speaker 1: Rodney Lee. I could do the nighttime yoga. You know

692
00:41:29,760 --> 00:41:34,560
Speaker 1: what I'm saying. We're gonna take a quick break and

693
00:41:34,600 --> 00:41:46,960
Speaker 1: then we'll be right back, you know, beyond. I supposed

694
00:41:46,960 --> 00:41:48,839
Speaker 1: to send me something. I'm so excited. I can't wait

695
00:41:48,840 --> 00:41:50,440
Speaker 1: to see whatever it is. She gonna send you one

696
00:41:50,520 --> 00:41:53,200
Speaker 1: in box thing all the calls and ship, I don't know.

697
00:41:54,600 --> 00:41:56,920
Speaker 1: I have no idea. It could it could be a pickle,

698
00:41:56,960 --> 00:42:00,080
Speaker 1: pick foot, it could be anything. I don't know. I

699
00:42:00,080 --> 00:42:02,439
Speaker 1: love her and I'm still do fee ship. Every time

700
00:42:02,480 --> 00:42:05,239
Speaker 1: I'm around that woman I'd be like I've never ever

701
00:42:05,360 --> 00:42:10,799
Speaker 1: met her. Never. I can't. She tried. I've talked to

702
00:42:10,880 --> 00:42:13,120
Speaker 1: myself on my way into things like all right, you

703
00:42:13,120 --> 00:42:15,040
Speaker 1: know you're gonna see. Be Honest, I get yourself together.

704
00:42:15,360 --> 00:42:19,920
Speaker 1: You know, every time I talked to her only twice,

705
00:42:20,040 --> 00:42:21,879
Speaker 1: but she like want to us, she do feel like us.

706
00:42:22,880 --> 00:42:26,040
Speaker 1: I'd be like, that's how she can't. I can't talk,

707
00:42:27,040 --> 00:42:31,800
Speaker 1: I can't. And she loves you so Goddamn much. Her too.

708
00:42:33,520 --> 00:42:35,759
Speaker 1: I love her, love her lover. She does this thing

709
00:42:35,880 --> 00:42:38,399
Speaker 1: on the plastic on the couch song that sounds just

710
00:42:38,520 --> 00:42:41,279
Speaker 1: like you. She does this thing is vocally I'm a.

711
00:42:42,880 --> 00:42:44,680
Speaker 1: She does it a couple of times and I said

712
00:42:44,920 --> 00:42:51,480
Speaker 1: I believe me. I was like, that's me, she loves me.

713
00:42:52,480 --> 00:42:55,799
Speaker 1: She did a thing. Said, oh, that's too. And then

714
00:42:55,880 --> 00:42:57,719
Speaker 1: there's that one song that said it was just like

715
00:42:57,800 --> 00:43:01,360
Speaker 1: Kelly Roland, just like Kelly row I mean she definitely

716
00:43:01,520 --> 00:43:04,719
Speaker 1: studies like vocal stylings. That's one thing I think is

717
00:43:04,800 --> 00:43:07,640
Speaker 1: kind of cool about what she does is that she

718
00:43:07,760 --> 00:43:11,920
Speaker 1: has the she has the technical skill and the education.

719
00:43:12,160 --> 00:43:15,719
Speaker 1: She has a thing where she can mimic stylings that

720
00:43:15,800 --> 00:43:19,319
Speaker 1: everybody can't do. That that's what makes her actually quite different.

721
00:43:19,680 --> 00:43:21,880
Speaker 1: That with the Grace Jones cut, I was like, okay,

722
00:43:22,760 --> 00:43:25,360
Speaker 1: even to me. But she does that with afrobeat, she

723
00:43:25,440 --> 00:43:28,000
Speaker 1: does it with Reggae, she's done it with country, she's

724
00:43:28,000 --> 00:43:30,279
Speaker 1: done it with pop. I mean she knows how to

725
00:43:30,760 --> 00:43:34,960
Speaker 1: create the character needed for the for the record, I

726
00:43:34,960 --> 00:43:38,960
Speaker 1: feel like that is that's discipline. I feel like. I

727
00:43:39,000 --> 00:43:41,319
Speaker 1: really feel like that. She actually takes the time to

728
00:43:41,480 --> 00:43:47,120
Speaker 1: study and practice things. She's very well, obviously gifted as

729
00:43:47,160 --> 00:43:51,799
Speaker 1: so much, but she she clearly takes the time to

730
00:43:52,000 --> 00:43:56,480
Speaker 1: practice a thing, and that's that's what that's what I'm

731
00:43:56,480 --> 00:43:59,440
Speaker 1: talking about. When I'm like, Damn, in my beyonce, mine,

732
00:43:59,520 --> 00:44:03,239
Speaker 1: like I have to get a lot more, more, and actually,

733
00:44:03,440 --> 00:44:07,040
Speaker 1: I want to say this, I think that because the

734
00:44:07,200 --> 00:44:13,000
Speaker 1: people around her respect that how important that processes. When

735
00:44:13,080 --> 00:44:17,720
Speaker 1: she had children, her children were brought into her life

736
00:44:18,080 --> 00:44:20,919
Speaker 1: in such a way, incorporated into her life in such

737
00:44:20,960 --> 00:44:26,600
Speaker 1: a way that respected that. That space to study was

738
00:44:27,080 --> 00:44:31,080
Speaker 1: is needed, and I think that's what allows her to

739
00:44:31,160 --> 00:44:34,320
Speaker 1: be mother to three children into also, I mean outside

740
00:44:34,320 --> 00:44:36,480
Speaker 1: of half. You know, just because you can pay for

741
00:44:36,520 --> 00:44:39,120
Speaker 1: help doesn't mean you get good help. There's that the

742
00:44:39,239 --> 00:44:43,799
Speaker 1: people around her respect her process and there are people

743
00:44:43,840 --> 00:44:46,240
Speaker 1: who love and respect her. You can tell that because

744
00:44:46,640 --> 00:44:50,680
Speaker 1: you can't function like that in those dual roles, the

745
00:44:50,760 --> 00:44:52,640
Speaker 1: type of time and energy she has to put in

746
00:44:52,719 --> 00:44:56,839
Speaker 1: to be excellent. That up all night, that that that

747
00:44:56,840 --> 00:45:01,799
Speaker 1: that constant boom, boom, boom. Yeah, no, and that's that's

748
00:45:01,800 --> 00:45:07,239
Speaker 1: a requirement. That's that's a requirement moving forward. When you

749
00:45:07,280 --> 00:45:09,320
Speaker 1: know that you need time, you don't want to be

750
00:45:09,400 --> 00:45:12,960
Speaker 1: with anybody that's monopolizing all of your time or trying to.

751
00:45:13,360 --> 00:45:17,160
Speaker 1: That's that's a real thing, you know, getting away from

752
00:45:17,160 --> 00:45:20,720
Speaker 1: from the people that you love in order to finish

753
00:45:20,840 --> 00:45:23,919
Speaker 1: the process of what you're trying to do and them

754
00:45:23,960 --> 00:45:30,799
Speaker 1: allowing you to get away. Yes, step five here is

755
00:45:30,840 --> 00:45:34,560
Speaker 1: to create new habits and rituals. Working on it. I

756
00:45:34,600 --> 00:45:37,160
Speaker 1: like to meditation piece I was talking about earlier. I

757
00:45:37,200 --> 00:45:38,640
Speaker 1: was like, I know, Damn well, I need to get

758
00:45:38,680 --> 00:45:41,560
Speaker 1: up in the mornings and do more these meditations on

759
00:45:41,600 --> 00:45:43,799
Speaker 1: the daily just start my day off right. But it's

760
00:45:43,840 --> 00:45:47,759
Speaker 1: the foundation you are laying. This is what angel was

761
00:45:47,800 --> 00:45:52,080
Speaker 1: saying earlier. Is exactly what she was saying. To avoid

762
00:45:52,120 --> 00:45:57,880
Speaker 1: feeling intimidated, keep it simple, break your goals into small,

763
00:45:58,080 --> 00:46:05,000
Speaker 1: doable steps, the micro dose of, you know, accomplishments. Don't

764
00:46:05,040 --> 00:46:09,080
Speaker 1: make it so heavy. Um. Number six is change your

765
00:46:09,120 --> 00:46:18,160
Speaker 1: perception about willpower. You know perception as a mother. If

766
00:46:18,160 --> 00:46:22,000
Speaker 1: you believe you have limited amount of willpower, you probably

767
00:46:22,040 --> 00:46:27,080
Speaker 1: won't surpass those limits. What about changing your perception? The

768
00:46:27,280 --> 00:46:31,560
Speaker 1: seal candidate who believes they probably won't make it through

769
00:46:31,600 --> 00:46:36,480
Speaker 1: training will not succeed. Why assume our will to win

770
00:46:37,160 --> 00:46:41,840
Speaker 1: can only take us so far? When we embrace the

771
00:46:41,880 --> 00:46:46,839
Speaker 1: mindset of unlimited willpower, we continue to grow, achieve more

772
00:46:46,960 --> 00:46:51,520
Speaker 1: and develop mental toughness. It is the simple philosophy as

773
00:46:51,960 --> 00:46:57,640
Speaker 1: setting stretched goals. In short, our internal conceptions about willpower

774
00:46:58,360 --> 00:47:03,040
Speaker 1: and self control can determine how disciplined we actually are.

775
00:47:03,640 --> 00:47:05,759
Speaker 1: I love it so any time that I'm like, Oh,

776
00:47:05,800 --> 00:47:08,080
Speaker 1: I'll never be able to I can't do that, you

777
00:47:08,120 --> 00:47:10,160
Speaker 1: know you better watch you, as as they say it

778
00:47:10,200 --> 00:47:14,200
Speaker 1: around that way, watch your motherfucking mouth. Definitely have to

779
00:47:14,200 --> 00:47:16,000
Speaker 1: watch the words you put out there and you affirm,

780
00:47:17,040 --> 00:47:22,080
Speaker 1: and watch you and manifest, because Ye, don't say what

781
00:47:22,120 --> 00:47:24,279
Speaker 1: you can't do. Don't say what won't happen. Don't say

782
00:47:24,320 --> 00:47:26,160
Speaker 1: what won't happen. Say Well, will if you wanted to.

783
00:47:26,800 --> 00:47:29,719
Speaker 1: Anybody that's listening to Jay Dot Il the PODCAST, you

784
00:47:29,800 --> 00:47:33,040
Speaker 1: know that this is not just about, you know, three

785
00:47:33,040 --> 00:47:36,840
Speaker 1: women expounding on our experience and all the things that

786
00:47:36,920 --> 00:47:40,160
Speaker 1: we know. We're in the process of growing and learning

787
00:47:40,600 --> 00:47:45,080
Speaker 1: every day and we're just exceptionally blessed to be able

788
00:47:45,120 --> 00:47:50,000
Speaker 1: to share these conversations with you, um, because really and

789
00:47:50,000 --> 00:47:52,600
Speaker 1: truly we want that for you, to want you to grow,

790
00:47:53,120 --> 00:47:55,480
Speaker 1: I want you to to figure out what you haven't

791
00:47:55,600 --> 00:47:59,560
Speaker 1: yet and know that you know. This is this is

792
00:47:59,560 --> 00:48:03,840
Speaker 1: a price sets. It's all a process and I definitely

793
00:48:03,880 --> 00:48:07,439
Speaker 1: appreciate having this conversation. I feel like I'm learning so much.

794
00:48:08,160 --> 00:48:12,200
Speaker 1: Step number seven is give yourself a backup plan. Okay,

795
00:48:12,239 --> 00:48:17,000
Speaker 1: this is controversial, though. You ever heard that? Uh, I

796
00:48:17,000 --> 00:48:18,480
Speaker 1: don't even know who it was. I think it was

797
00:48:18,719 --> 00:48:21,719
Speaker 1: Keena and ivory wains or Damon wains or somebody. I

798
00:48:21,760 --> 00:48:25,399
Speaker 1: think it was Smith, was it? Somebody says something ball

799
00:48:25,440 --> 00:48:28,040
Speaker 1: playing a and there's no other plans. Yeah, like don't

800
00:48:28,080 --> 00:48:31,800
Speaker 1: have a backup plan or fallback something. Don't have it.

801
00:48:31,800 --> 00:48:34,640
Speaker 1: It's like, that's interesting. I don't agree. I think you're

802
00:48:34,640 --> 00:48:37,919
Speaker 1: supposed to be playing him. Oh, that didn't work, okay,

803
00:48:38,200 --> 00:48:41,919
Speaker 1: moving on. Hey, that didn't work. Okay, that didn't work.

804
00:48:42,120 --> 00:48:46,640
Speaker 1: Moving on. That's what I think. And eventually, if you've

805
00:48:46,680 --> 00:48:50,880
Speaker 1: got the skill set or the talent or the personality

806
00:48:51,040 --> 00:48:56,160
Speaker 1: or the inclination, something's gonna hit. Yeah, something that's absolutely

807
00:48:56,200 --> 00:48:58,359
Speaker 1: gonna hit. As long as it's something that you love

808
00:48:58,440 --> 00:49:01,760
Speaker 1: to do, then you're you're good. Yeah, because I feel

809
00:49:01,800 --> 00:49:07,520
Speaker 1: like in my life um flexibility has been like a

810
00:49:07,560 --> 00:49:11,400
Speaker 1: blessing for me and but also too. I wanted to

811
00:49:11,480 --> 00:49:13,799
Speaker 1: kind of circle back to what you said, was you

812
00:49:13,840 --> 00:49:17,640
Speaker 1: know something's gonna hit. I think people just really don't

813
00:49:17,719 --> 00:49:21,919
Speaker 1: understand what a blessing consistency really is when you really

814
00:49:21,920 --> 00:49:23,640
Speaker 1: be on top of it and you stay on top

815
00:49:23,680 --> 00:49:26,160
Speaker 1: of and you keep going and keep doing what's necessary,

816
00:49:26,440 --> 00:49:30,040
Speaker 1: like it's going to come together, like it really is.

817
00:49:30,680 --> 00:49:33,440
Speaker 1: But I just feel like for some reason we can

818
00:49:33,480 --> 00:49:36,640
Speaker 1: talk ourselves out of of the the growth and the

819
00:49:36,680 --> 00:49:39,200
Speaker 1: consistency necessary to reach a goal before you can even

820
00:49:39,239 --> 00:49:42,719
Speaker 1: get there, because we expect certain things to happen and

821
00:49:42,840 --> 00:49:46,359
Speaker 1: certain things to kind of validate the efforts that we do.

822
00:49:47,280 --> 00:49:51,640
Speaker 1: I come from Joyce you know. One day she come

823
00:49:51,680 --> 00:49:56,520
Speaker 1: home and like I make smoothies, and then she makes

824
00:49:56,560 --> 00:49:59,920
Speaker 1: smoothies and then the whole neighborhood be on on Joycey's

825
00:50:00,080 --> 00:50:03,759
Speaker 1: movies and then she's like Hey, I'm going to sleep

826
00:50:03,800 --> 00:50:15,239
Speaker 1: for a week, I'm going to I'm going to make dressers.

827
00:50:15,760 --> 00:50:18,600
Speaker 1: She made anything and felt anything she felt like doing.

828
00:50:18,840 --> 00:50:22,239
Speaker 1: That's how we survived based on, you know, whatever came

829
00:50:22,280 --> 00:50:26,200
Speaker 1: up to her mind at that moment, a dress sign.

830
00:50:26,239 --> 00:50:29,120
Speaker 1: That's when you're playing m stuff comes from. That's fascinating.

831
00:50:29,120 --> 00:50:30,920
Speaker 1: I mean it always fascinates me when you know the

832
00:50:31,040 --> 00:50:33,800
Speaker 1: history of somebody right, like when you really know the context,

833
00:50:33,840 --> 00:50:36,479
Speaker 1: it's like, oh, okay. That's why Jill always has BC

834
00:50:36,840 --> 00:50:40,600
Speaker 1: yet and that's why Jill does also detest when people

835
00:50:40,880 --> 00:50:44,800
Speaker 1: are are frivolous, because if it wasn't for the pants

836
00:50:44,880 --> 00:50:47,959
Speaker 1: that she made, she wouldn't have been able to buy

837
00:50:48,280 --> 00:50:52,759
Speaker 1: the wood cutter thingy that she had. I forget what

838
00:50:52,800 --> 00:50:54,880
Speaker 1: kind of blade that was, but she wouldn't have been

839
00:50:54,920 --> 00:50:57,640
Speaker 1: able to buy that. And then, if she hadn't done

840
00:50:57,680 --> 00:51:00,200
Speaker 1: so well with all the address signs, she and have

841
00:51:00,239 --> 00:51:02,239
Speaker 1: been able to get the all apolyor thing and the

842
00:51:03,040 --> 00:51:06,879
Speaker 1: standing machine that she had to make her dressers. You got,

843
00:51:06,920 --> 00:51:08,879
Speaker 1: you must have this whole philosophy that kind of like

844
00:51:08,960 --> 00:51:10,759
Speaker 1: there's no reason why you can't figure out a way

845
00:51:10,760 --> 00:51:14,600
Speaker 1: to to if your mind is right and everything else

846
00:51:14,680 --> 00:51:16,920
Speaker 1: is right inside of you and physically, why can't you

847
00:51:16,920 --> 00:51:18,759
Speaker 1: figure out a way to provide, or at least like

848
00:51:19,239 --> 00:51:22,319
Speaker 1: eat in a way right, like what can we do

849
00:51:22,800 --> 00:51:28,879
Speaker 1: punch Ranella, punch enel. What can you do? And shoot, yeah,

850
00:51:29,000 --> 00:51:31,960
Speaker 1: I can do it. Do but you know what I'm saying,

851
00:51:32,200 --> 00:51:36,560
Speaker 1: like you might actually really want. I mean, I'm not

852
00:51:36,560 --> 00:51:41,160
Speaker 1: gonna lie to you. I definitely the first love has

853
00:51:41,239 --> 00:51:45,920
Speaker 1: always been writing. It's always been that. As I was

854
00:51:45,960 --> 00:51:48,319
Speaker 1: trying to get work as a writer, I sang so

855
00:51:48,360 --> 00:51:50,759
Speaker 1: they could understand what I was writing. And they're like, Hey,

856
00:51:50,840 --> 00:52:02,080
Speaker 1: you're a singer. I was like yes, yes, and then sure,

857
00:52:04,200 --> 00:52:10,439
Speaker 1: I am. Yeah, and then, you know, one thing led

858
00:52:10,480 --> 00:52:13,239
Speaker 1: to another, and you know, the poetry thing. I never

859
00:52:13,400 --> 00:52:16,200
Speaker 1: stopped that because I always loved writing. And then they

860
00:52:16,200 --> 00:52:18,960
Speaker 1: were like you're an actor, and I was like, indeed,

861
00:52:19,040 --> 00:52:27,759
Speaker 1: lie that. Yes, Song's gonna work, because I mean it

862
00:52:27,800 --> 00:52:30,680
Speaker 1: all and I'm not mad at any job that I have.

863
00:52:30,840 --> 00:52:34,359
Speaker 1: I'm not. You know, well, if this doesn't work out,

864
00:52:34,400 --> 00:52:38,080
Speaker 1: I'm gonna do construction. I did demolition and realized I

865
00:52:38,080 --> 00:52:41,120
Speaker 1: don't want to do that. You know, my back still

866
00:52:41,239 --> 00:52:45,600
Speaker 1: is mad at me about that one. But to rum nonetheless.

867
00:52:45,640 --> 00:52:47,959
Speaker 1: But you tried it because you could, because your body could.

868
00:52:48,000 --> 00:52:49,480
Speaker 1: Wouldn't let you do it at the time and you

869
00:52:49,520 --> 00:52:53,080
Speaker 1: were able. Yeah, but not pay for that one. Um

870
00:52:53,120 --> 00:52:56,919
Speaker 1: I'm gonna give you these last two real quick step eight,

871
00:52:57,000 --> 00:52:59,719
Speaker 1: fine trusted coaches or mentors. We talked about this all

872
00:52:59,760 --> 00:53:03,279
Speaker 1: the time. Yeah, find somebody that can help. God you

873
00:53:03,719 --> 00:53:07,640
Speaker 1: along the way, because nobody knows everything. You think are wonderful.

874
00:53:07,640 --> 00:53:10,120
Speaker 1: BEYONCE doesn't have people talking to her. But WHO's she

875
00:53:10,200 --> 00:53:14,280
Speaker 1: talking to? I would listen. I want to know beyonce's mentor.

876
00:53:14,800 --> 00:53:17,840
Speaker 1: That's right. Right. I'm like, is it like missy? That?

877
00:53:18,040 --> 00:53:20,040
Speaker 1: Maybe missy. That is one in a way. I don't know,

878
00:53:20,400 --> 00:53:24,520
Speaker 1: I don't know, I don't know. But wait, man, I

879
00:53:24,520 --> 00:53:26,600
Speaker 1: don't know. That's a that's a level of accountability. I

880
00:53:26,600 --> 00:53:30,680
Speaker 1: don't think I'm ready for to be beyonce's mentor. No,

881
00:53:30,880 --> 00:53:36,160
Speaker 1: to meet beyonce's mentor. Do you bow? Like what you like? Right,

882
00:53:36,200 --> 00:53:41,120
Speaker 1: what do you do? Curtsy, for sure. Step number nine,

883
00:53:42,000 --> 00:53:49,799
Speaker 1: according to Forbes on how to have self discipline and motivation,

884
00:53:50,280 --> 00:53:55,440
Speaker 1: I probably threw that in there, is forgive yourself and

885
00:53:55,520 --> 00:53:58,359
Speaker 1: move forward. Oh, you're gonna make that sound easy like that. Okay,

886
00:53:58,360 --> 00:54:02,520
Speaker 1: that's cute. That's cute. That's so. You're not saying so

887
00:54:04,160 --> 00:54:07,480
Speaker 1: added yourself is you didn't accomplish this thing. Forgive Yourself.

888
00:54:08,239 --> 00:54:11,520
Speaker 1: It's nothing. Has An opportunity to wake up tomorrow. See,

889
00:54:11,520 --> 00:54:14,359
Speaker 1: that's some self that's high level self work. You can

890
00:54:14,400 --> 00:54:17,560
Speaker 1: do that thing. That doesn't mean that we get to

891
00:54:17,600 --> 00:54:20,000
Speaker 1: just keep putting it off and putting it off, because

892
00:54:20,440 --> 00:54:24,239
Speaker 1: that's not that's discipline. That's just more procrastination, and we've

893
00:54:24,239 --> 00:54:30,480
Speaker 1: got plenty of that. Plenty. But forgive yourself lovingly and

894
00:54:30,520 --> 00:54:35,720
Speaker 1: move forward. That's that's number nine. Are you know, all right, Forbes?

895
00:54:35,800 --> 00:54:38,600
Speaker 1: You know I'll rock with you on this one. I've

896
00:54:38,640 --> 00:54:42,320
Speaker 1: seen some things that work. Nine powerful ways to cultivate

897
00:54:42,400 --> 00:54:45,880
Speaker 1: extreme self discipline. I don't know about the extreme portion,

898
00:54:46,440 --> 00:54:48,319
Speaker 1: but I'm gonna take what I can get from out

899
00:54:48,320 --> 00:54:52,960
Speaker 1: of this thing because I've got some goals. I definitely do.

900
00:54:53,239 --> 00:54:57,600
Speaker 1: I also think um congratulate us for having already implemented

901
00:54:57,640 --> 00:54:59,799
Speaker 1: some of these things already than being a part of

902
00:54:59,800 --> 00:55:04,440
Speaker 1: our personal ways of doing things, and so maybe we

903
00:55:04,440 --> 00:55:10,839
Speaker 1: weren't as off we thought we were. I hugged myself

904
00:55:11,000 --> 00:55:19,160
Speaker 1: really softly. Just thank you so much for listening to

905
00:55:19,280 --> 00:55:31,239
Speaker 1: Jay dot ill little podcast. Please Hug yourself softly. Fisha.

906
00:55:31,880 --> 00:55:36,360
Speaker 1: How do you eat an elephant? One by it time.

907
00:55:37,520 --> 00:55:40,839
Speaker 1: Hey listeners, it's amber, the producer of Jay Dot Il here.

908
00:55:41,760 --> 00:55:46,040
Speaker 1: Let's all remember to frame self discipline and success with happiness,

909
00:55:46,800 --> 00:55:50,439
Speaker 1: rest and balance. I'm dropping a link in the show

910
00:55:50,480 --> 00:55:52,600
Speaker 1: notes from the Forbes article that you'll read to you

911
00:55:52,640 --> 00:55:56,680
Speaker 1: from today's episode. Take care of yourselves. You are worth it.

912
00:55:57,600 --> 00:56:14,600
Speaker 1: Rest and happiness are all elements to success. Hi If

913
00:56:14,640 --> 00:56:17,480
Speaker 1: you have comments on something he said in this episode

914
00:56:17,840 --> 00:56:21,360
Speaker 1: called eight six six. Hey, Jill, if you want to

915
00:56:21,400 --> 00:56:25,400
Speaker 1: add to this conversation, that's eight six six nine five

916
00:56:25,520 --> 00:56:28,480
Speaker 1: four five by. Don't forget to tell us your name

917
00:56:28,600 --> 00:56:32,040
Speaker 1: and the episode you're referring to. You might just hear

918
00:56:32,120 --> 00:56:35,800
Speaker 1: your message on a future episode. Thank you for listening

919
00:56:36,000 --> 00:56:42,640
Speaker 1: to Jill Scott Presents Jay dot ill. The podcast Ja

920
00:56:42,840 --> 00:56:46,200
Speaker 1: dot ill is a production of I heart radio. For

921
00:56:46,320 --> 00:56:49,839
Speaker 1: more podcast from I heart radio, visit the I heart

922
00:56:49,960 --> 00:56:54,160
Speaker 1: radio APP, apple podcast or wherever you listen to your

923
00:56:54,239 --> 00:56:55,120
Speaker 1: favorite shows.