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Speaker 1: We're starting another episode of Diamonds in the Rough. I

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Speaker 1: love that. Me and Erica we're having what we rat

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Speaker 1: just a small rant, a private rant, and then we're like, oh,

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Speaker 1: should we get started. Our producer goes.

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Speaker 2: Oh, we're rolling.

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Speaker 1: Thanks, thanks, Jeff Lewis Junior.

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Speaker 2: Oh oh, well, all right, so welcome back to our

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Speaker 2: second episode of Diamonds in the Rough. And I hope

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Speaker 2: you liked the first one because we've got some more

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Speaker 2: coming for you.

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Speaker 1: We've got some more. People really loved it. They loved hearing.

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Speaker 1: I guess I don't even know if it's a softer

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Speaker 1: side to each of us, but hearing a side of

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Speaker 1: some of the questions that people haven't really gotten into.

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Speaker 1: And I talked about this on to Cheese and a

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Speaker 1: Pod with Tam. I said, sometimes what's really annoying when

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Speaker 1: you're watching a housewife shows. Somebody will share information and

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Speaker 1: then nobody asks the question back because they're so worried

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Speaker 1: about what they're going to promote. Yes, so you don't

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Speaker 1: get to the bottom of a lot of things that

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Speaker 1: I actually think are interesting because the other person's being

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Speaker 1: so selfish that they're like, hold on, to get hold.

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Speaker 2: On, let me say what I need to say. Hold on,

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Speaker 2: let me say what I need to say.

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Speaker 1: What's what's new? What is new?

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Speaker 2: Oh? Downstairs, you know I have an electric car. I

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Speaker 2: have an electric Porsche, by the way, and I just

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Speaker 2: like saying that. But all the ev spots were taken

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Speaker 2: up by Tesla's and I was a little because I

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Speaker 2: don't have I should have plugged in my car at home,

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Speaker 2: and it was on my to do list, But somehow

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Speaker 2: or another I got caught up in watching other podcasts

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Speaker 2: on YouTube, nothing like ours, but something different, and I

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Speaker 2: just was watching it all night long and I forgot

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Speaker 2: to plug in my car, and then downstairs they didn't

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Speaker 2: have any spots for me. It's okay, I'm rude. I'll

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Speaker 2: make it home.

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Speaker 1: I listening to this book. This is just off topic,

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Speaker 1: but it's the it's what's it called Dinner with Vampires? Oh?

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Speaker 2: What's that?

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Speaker 1: Oh my god? It's about is it? No, it's a

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Speaker 1: true it's a memoir.

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Speaker 2: It's your family, hold on life, Dinner Vampires.

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Speaker 1: Starring But it's at Bethany joy Lyn's from One Yeah,

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Speaker 1: Dinner for Vampires. It's been on the New York Times

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Speaker 1: bestseller list multiple times. But I started listening to it

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Speaker 1: because it was about being in a religious cult and

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Speaker 1: uh Jesus, she married like the son of like the

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Speaker 1: head cult leader and it was the girl from One

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Speaker 1: Tree Hill and she was an actress. It's really good

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Speaker 1: and like not being in narcissistic relationships like it was.

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Speaker 1: It's really good. You should listen.

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Speaker 2: I watch a lot of those docs on cult leaders

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Speaker 2: and it is fascinating the way like normal people, I

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Speaker 2: mean seemingly normal people get really involved in these cults

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Speaker 2: like that TikTok dance cult.

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Speaker 1: Oh oh, that one was a good one.

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Speaker 2: Did you see the Mother God one where she where.

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Speaker 1: She was drinking like ten, she turned.

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Speaker 2: Green, she turned silk up blue codial silver yeah, yeah

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Speaker 2: whatever whatever silver colid. Yes, and then they drove around

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Speaker 2: with her body in the in the with the Christmas

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Speaker 2: lights and ship. I mean, it's possible because you are

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Speaker 2: in a psychotic state. But also I think what you're

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Speaker 2: channeling some god and I don't know if it's our

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Speaker 2: God or there got whatever.

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Speaker 1: But that so many people are impressionable or feel so alone.

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Speaker 1: Yes that they.

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Speaker 2: Are, and they're in a vulnerable place. Yeah, they're in

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Speaker 2: a vulnerable place, or they don't have a sense of

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Speaker 2: belonging anythink.

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Speaker 1: And what what Joylynn said was she you know, has

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Speaker 1: been an actor since she was a little kid, and

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Speaker 1: you know, she grew up in the church and she

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Speaker 1: had had kind of this harder, harder life going up

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Speaker 1: because she was an introvert, and then she would do

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Speaker 1: all for acting and then the church wouldn't really accept her.

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Speaker 1: And she started this. Originally it was just kind of

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Speaker 1: like a Bible study, okay, and then it turned it

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Speaker 1: into something out yeah, and it just it made me

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Speaker 1: think about like what we're talking about through this through

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Speaker 1: on Diamonds in the Rough. It's like sometimes when you

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Speaker 1: are on television, sometimes when you have to put on

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Speaker 1: this persona.

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Speaker 2: And it is that it's a persona, it's a performance.

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Speaker 2: It's an outward facing public persona. Yeah.

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Speaker 1: That then sometimes you're so desperate to connect or to

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Speaker 1: feel sure.

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Speaker 2: And people it's it's a strange place because I think

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Speaker 2: sometimes people assume and being on reality TV is such

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Speaker 2: a different thing. Like I don't get to take this

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Speaker 2: character named Erica off, like she lives with me, I

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Speaker 2: am she I just like you don't get to take

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Speaker 2: Teddy off and put her in the corner and oh

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Speaker 2: that was a role I'm playing and I'm actually this

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Speaker 2: other person. No, And when people meet you out and

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Speaker 2: they fully they fully accept what they seen on television,

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Speaker 2: and you can't be anything other than that. And that's

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Speaker 2: sometimes hard to live with.

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Speaker 1: And you can't even really if you show, if you

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Speaker 1: show emotion, you've shared too much, or you're you're trying

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Speaker 1: to get attention, or you're trying to get back on

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Speaker 1: a show, or you're looking for cloud or it's you're thirsty.

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Speaker 1: But if you don't share enough, you're boring. You're boring

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Speaker 1: or you know what, you're a hypocrite because you're not sharing.

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Speaker 1: It's it's such are you're hiding? I mean, all of it.

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Speaker 1: We've gotten every single criticism you can, you could you

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Speaker 1: could possibly get. But a lot of this episode we're

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Speaker 1: going to talk about, like when we first came out here,

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Speaker 1: We're gonna talk a little bit about nepotism. But first,

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Speaker 1: let's talk a little bit about just headlines that we've seen.

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Speaker 2: Okay, let's do it.

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Speaker 1: You want to take the first one.

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Speaker 2: Sure. Beyonce Blue Ivy coordinate in their golden gowns as

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Speaker 2: they bring a strong bond to Mufasa. On Monday, December ninth,

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Speaker 2: Blue Ivy in her mother Beyonce walk the Red carpet

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Speaker 2: premiere form of Fasa The Lion King, and in a

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Speaker 2: video that's circulating on TikTok that starts with the Blue

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Speaker 2: Ivy taking photos alone, Beyonce comes in to also be

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Speaker 2: in one of the pictures, and to some viewers that

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Speaker 2: looked like Blue was annoyed for her mom like kind

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Speaker 2: of interfering with her moment. People online felt like Blue

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Speaker 2: should be thankful that she has the nepotism available to

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Speaker 2: walk on that red carpet. What do you think?

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Speaker 1: Well, I think there's also another piece to this puzzle.

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Speaker 1: She's a teenager. She's one a teenager.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, she's a teenager, and she's also a human being

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Speaker 2: outside of being Beyonce and jay Z's Yeah, like I think.

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Speaker 1: About my kids and it doesn't matter if I'm in

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Speaker 1: a red carpet or not.

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Speaker 2: But like, no, I was gonna think about it. I

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Speaker 2: wanted you to talk about how you grew up with

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Speaker 2: your father, Like you grew up with a very famous father.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, but I also wasn't doing like red car We

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Speaker 1: lived in Indiana and Hiltonhead there was. It wasn't like

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Speaker 1: I was walking a bunch of red carpet.

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Speaker 2: But it didn't matter.

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Speaker 1: He was still just your dad. Yeah, but I think

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Speaker 1: that And there's also more levels, like people are like, oh,

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Speaker 1: she seemed annoyed, but in the same moment, what about

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Speaker 1: Beyonce probably wanted to protect Blue Ivy in that moment

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Speaker 1: because of everything in the press going on with jay Z. Well, like,

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Speaker 1: there's so many levels to everything.

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Speaker 2: Beyonce is a mom trying to and their daughter. There

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Speaker 2: could you imagine living in the shadow of someone like Beyonce,

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Speaker 2: jay Z, Lebron James. I mean, you can look at

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Speaker 2: it in politics. It's just living in the shadow of

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Speaker 2: these very famous icons as parents. That's got to be

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Speaker 2: a mind trip on it own. Like these kids don't

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Speaker 2: get enough in my opinion, understanding, how are you ever

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Speaker 2: going to fill a great man and woman's shoes like that?

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Speaker 2: That's an impossible task. So of course, yes, she's lucky

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Speaker 2: to have the life that she lives, but guys, it

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Speaker 2: does not come free. She's paying a price, whether it's

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Speaker 2: you know, emotionally, physically, psychologically. You know, nothing in life

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Speaker 2: is easy, even if your parents are jay Z and

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Speaker 2: Beyonce got this job to break, and.

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Speaker 1: I mean it also comes with I mean I didn't

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Speaker 1: have this, but like imagine being followed around with security

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Speaker 1: twenty four to seven, having.

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Speaker 2: This zero freedom, zero freedom and zero room to mess

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Speaker 2: up zero And.

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Speaker 1: When you do mess up, everybody is going to highlight it,

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Speaker 1: especially now that there's social media. There's everything. Like I mean,

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Speaker 1: we had a couple of polaroids when I was younger

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Speaker 1: of like my bad behavior, Like what man, we didn't

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Speaker 1: even have polaroids and.

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Speaker 2: Go drop off the film and there is none.

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Speaker 1: So ah, but I don't even I think she was

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Speaker 1: just being a teenager and it didn't bother me.

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Speaker 2: It didn't bother me at all.

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Speaker 1: And also she wanted to go to the premiere. Like

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Speaker 1: if she didn't want to go, I'm sure she could

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Speaker 1: have said, I don't want to go.

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Speaker 2: She looks great, isn't she in the movie?

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Speaker 1: In the movie, but like she's going to go, I mean, right,

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Speaker 1: But if she didn't want to be in a picture

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Speaker 1: with her mom, really.

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Speaker 2: I'm sure leave Blue Ivy alone.

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Speaker 1: She also was happy to be on stage with her

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Speaker 1: mom at Coachella.

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Speaker 2: Also received criticism and came back stronger. Yeah and so

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Speaker 2: you know, like, let these children live, let these children grow,

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Speaker 2: let these and stop being So of course she's annoyed.

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Speaker 2: She's a teenager and I.

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Speaker 1: Think that also, And we'll get into it because now

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Speaker 1: we react to Gwyneth Paltrow's daughter Apple. So Apple jumps

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Speaker 1: into a debutant's photo, that's Gwyneth Paltrow's daughter. After there

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Speaker 1: was mean girl backlash. This was on page six. Apple

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Speaker 1: Martin was labeled a mean girl over the weekend for

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Speaker 1: playfully jumping into a fellow debutant's photo. Can you pronounce

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Speaker 1: this detante?

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Speaker 2: I don't know, And then the next word, I don't know,

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Speaker 2: but I know it said, listen, it's very fancy French

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Speaker 2: and this is a very you know, to be a

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Speaker 2: debutante is something, I mean, that's lovely and to be

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Speaker 2: in France and to make your debut. Yeah.

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Speaker 1: Well, the French debutant from the viral video told People

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Speaker 1: Thursday that Apple twenty doesn't deserve an ounce of what

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Speaker 1: she's getting online. Why not, Well, they're all saying she's

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Speaker 1: a mean girl because she jumped into the photo.

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Speaker 2: But Apple's been photographed since she was an embryo. Yeah, Like,

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Speaker 2: like again, is she not allowed to have fun?

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Speaker 1: Are you just?

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Speaker 2: Are you just sour grapes? Because Apples jumped in your photo?

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Speaker 1: But she's not even sour grape. She's saying she doesn't

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Speaker 1: deserve she doesn't deserve it. Even the person whose photos

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Speaker 1: she jumped into.

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Speaker 2: Wait, is sticking up for her. Oh, I'm misreading what

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Speaker 2: a ding dong?

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Speaker 1: Sorry?

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Speaker 2: Yes, thank you for the French debutante who agrees with us.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean in the video in question, I hate that.

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Speaker 2: I look at me. I was always going to the negative.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, she's like, anyways, fuck that French debutat.

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Speaker 2: I just give that all back. I'm so very sorry.

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Speaker 2: Thank you to the lovely French debutante who stuck up

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Speaker 2: for Apple.

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Speaker 1: Martin who we can't pronounce her name, but we're trying.

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Speaker 1: Loppin de Montemart was posing at her black gown when

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Speaker 1: she turned around and saw Apple walking into frame after

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Speaker 1: and striking pose after post at the time, she brushed

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Speaker 1: off the interruption and continued walking.

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Speaker 2: Yeah.

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Speaker 1: Then. Apple also made headlines after the annual event for

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Speaker 1: an interaction with her date, Count Leohinkle Vaughan Donner. Smart.

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Speaker 2: She sounds so euro and so fab it sounds so rich.

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Speaker 2: It really does. It sounds like something like we don't

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Speaker 2: have here in America.

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Speaker 1: It sounds richer than Teddy Joe.

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Speaker 2: Mellencamp or yeah, I don't even I'm not even saying

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Speaker 2: my name because there's a whole lot of shit that

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Speaker 2: comes to mind. So we got it.

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Speaker 1: She was filmed visibly rolling her eyes during a conversation

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Speaker 1: with the New York University students. She was filmed being

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Speaker 1: a human being. Oh okay, yeah, yeah, and I'm sorry

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Speaker 1: Apple's been getting shit since they named her Apple.

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Speaker 2: I agree, I agree. And she's going this daughter and

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Speaker 2: you know Chris's dad's yeah, like that's her dad. I mean, guys,

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Speaker 2: leave Apple alone again? Can these people just live?

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Speaker 1: No? They can't. Here we go, Yeah, here's another one.

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Speaker 2: Okay, well you know what. Okay, So Kim's getting a

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Speaker 2: blamed for you know, North and Chicago West being and

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Speaker 2: their father Kanye West music video. Well, if you can't

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Speaker 2: put your kids in your own music video, like, who cares,

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Speaker 2: it's his music video. Let them do what they want.

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Speaker 2: It's their money, their time, their children. If you don't

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Speaker 2: like it, well then I don't know what to say.

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Speaker 1: And while some are giving the exes like they're proud

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Speaker 1: that they're giving their girls creative freedom. Other labeled the

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Speaker 1: opportunity as peak nepotism.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, they have. I'm here, let me lay out the

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Speaker 2: facts for you. Nepotism has been around since like before

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Speaker 2: or you know, the dawn of man, whether it's a

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Speaker 2: bakery that you hand down to your sons or whether

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Speaker 2: you were the daughters of Kim and Kanye. I mean nepotism.

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Speaker 2: I mean we've had two fathersome presidents in the United

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Speaker 2: States of America, And yes, that's true. I looked it up.

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Speaker 2: And you know what else, there's nepotism in every field,

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Speaker 2: and this happens to be their children. Imagine being their children.

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Speaker 2: That's a very hard place to be. Yes, it's rich.

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Speaker 2: Yes you have things that other kids don't have, but

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Speaker 2: you also have this unrealistic pressure placed upon you that

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Speaker 2: most children will never understand and most adults will never understand.

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Speaker 1: And I can say from personal experience, personal experience and

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Speaker 1: knowing other kids of famous people, famous people, it either

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Speaker 1: comes with an extreme level of trying to be perfect,

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Speaker 1: of perfectionism U or the complete opposite.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I've seen.

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Speaker 1: Where it's like you're just like fuck it. I want

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Speaker 1: to be completely the opposite of anything that.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, and some people go so far as to change

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Speaker 2: their name and never talk to their family again. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: and it's just it runs a gamut. I mean, there's

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Speaker 2: no fameous not.

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Speaker 1: But I don't get hating on the kids for it,

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Speaker 1: like you can't.

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Speaker 2: They're just kids.

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Speaker 1: They're just kids.

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Speaker 2: And you know, I.

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Speaker 1: Don't know, do you think it's do.

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Speaker 2: You think it's unfair or do you think when is

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Speaker 2: the world fair? Right? When has that been? Uh? There

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Speaker 2: is no fair in this life or this world that

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Speaker 2: that doesn't even enter the equation.

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Speaker 1: Well, I mean, and you can even go, like even

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Speaker 1: in the South, like whether it's nepotism or not. But

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Speaker 1: I remember meeting you know, blah blah blah the fourth

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Speaker 1: Oh yeah, absolutely, you know he had money. Well, of course,

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Speaker 1: why would we name them. It was a family, it

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Speaker 1: was a family line. Nobody nobody said for the third

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Speaker 1: of the fourth if you're broke. Yeah, it's like we're

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Speaker 1: changing up, changing up the entire situation in here. People

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Speaker 1: are asking me, do I feel that nepotism has helped

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Speaker 1: me and are hurt me in my career? I mean,

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Speaker 1: I would say that the lessons that my dad instilled

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Speaker 1: in me and working very hard. I was going to

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Speaker 1: say that has helped me, Like there's been having your dad.

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Speaker 1: He's been very very hard on me. But he also

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Speaker 1: you know today, he's the first person that called me

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Speaker 1: this morning and he's like, you know, just checking in

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Speaker 1: on you. How is it going? And so I think

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Speaker 1: it can be challenging, Like but I think, yes, having

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Speaker 1: somebody with a famous last name as a relative can

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Speaker 1: get you in the door, but.

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Speaker 2: You have to carry the ball from there.

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Speaker 1: You have to carry the ball from there. And then

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Speaker 1: also it can hurt you, like in the same way.

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Speaker 1: Like people's favorite thing, other than that I'm boring, their

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Speaker 1: second favorite thing to say about me is that I'm

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Speaker 1: John Mellencamp's.

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Speaker 2: Daughter, So therefore this is all because of him.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, and I don't deserve to be a human being,

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Speaker 1: and you know, yes, I'm riding on his coattails and

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Speaker 1: so there is challenges and that can't feel good at all.

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Speaker 1: I mean, I think it's weird because it goes back

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Speaker 1: to that original conversation is if I if I say

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Speaker 1: something like, well, I mean I moved out to California

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Speaker 1: at seventeen and I've been supporting myself and I don't

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Speaker 1: have a trust fund, and you know, I've had a

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Speaker 1: million rejections. People are like, oh, what do you want

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Speaker 1: a pity party?

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Speaker 2: No, it's just actually a fact. Yeah, Like it's actually

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Speaker 2: to show you that all of this advantage you thought

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Speaker 2: I got really wasn't there. Yeah, And I mean, I

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Speaker 2: mean some I'm sure something's but certainly, Yeah, you've worked

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Speaker 2: very hard. Your dad has not and John don't come

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Speaker 2: for me, but you know, I mean.

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Speaker 1: He has not. No, and I mean there's he's laid

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Speaker 1: it on you very real. Yeah, And I would imagine

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Speaker 1: that a lot of other parents have done the same.

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Speaker 2: I know some very successful men that did not hand

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Speaker 2: their children their fortune or their business simply because anti quote,

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Speaker 2: they don't have the talent. But I think also, I

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Speaker 2: mean I've seen that, and I've seen it in business.

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Speaker 2: I see it in like, you know, hardcore business, like

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Speaker 2: they don't have the talent. I'm not doing that.

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Speaker 1: But also, what what bens the like would you be

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Speaker 1: able to like, would people be able to say that

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Speaker 1: your son is nepotent.

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Speaker 2: Like, well, my son's a cops and there's that in

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Speaker 2: the streets. I don't know if that's anything to be.

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Speaker 1: But you see what I'm saying, like, how does that

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Speaker 1: not exist everywhere then exactly? And like how do you

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Speaker 1: shelter your kids from being considered You can't?

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Speaker 2: I mean, and it's just people are going to you

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Speaker 2: have to.

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Speaker 1: I think that.

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Speaker 2: Look, at some point, when you're in the public, you're

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Speaker 2: going to have to accept the fact that you have

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Speaker 2: to pay a tax for this, this public life, and

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Speaker 2: part of it is being misunderstood, uh rushed to judgment

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Speaker 2: and things like oh, you only got here because of

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Speaker 2: your father's last name or your mother is Kim Kardashian,

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Speaker 2: therefore you have our no value and you know, which

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Speaker 2: is not true, and that's not fair. But when is

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Speaker 2: life fair?

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Speaker 1: Life isn't fair, which brings us to fame our next

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Speaker 1: thing that or infamy. Can you give me the definition

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Speaker 1: of Yeah, it's being known for not good shit is.

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Speaker 2: One of my lawyers looked at me and said, hey,

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Speaker 2: you're not famous, you're infamous. So I was like, give

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Speaker 2: an al capone infamous, you're infamous.

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Speaker 1: I was like, great, that's that's yeah. What were your dreams.

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Speaker 2: As Okay, So my dream was always to perform, meaning

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Speaker 2: that from the time I was about three or four,

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Speaker 2: I would create shows, even though they were nothing. I

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Speaker 2: would get into a closet, ask my mother to introduce me,

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Speaker 2: and I would literally jump up on like the coffee table,

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Speaker 2: like in front of us, and sing and dance for

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Speaker 2: my mother, my grandmother, anybody that was listening and watching.

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Speaker 2: And from that, my mom put me in dance and

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Speaker 2: children's theater and it never stopped. I went to a

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Speaker 2: great performing arts high school in Atlanta, which is no

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Speaker 2: longer there. At the time it was called Northside School

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Speaker 2: of Performing Arts. And then I wanted to continue my

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Speaker 2: life of performing and moved to New York City and

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Speaker 2: settled in Los Angeles about eight years later. Seven years later.

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Speaker 2: So for me, performance has all and I managed to

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Speaker 2: take long breaks in between. I was married twice and

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Speaker 2: when I and became a mom, so I wasn't performing then,

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Speaker 2: but that was always gnawing at my heart, like to perform,

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Speaker 2: to create, and when I was living Tom's life, and

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Speaker 2: I really was living Tom's life up for about seven

385
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Speaker 2: years and then I said, you know what, Tom, I

386
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Speaker 2: need to create. I need to do things like it

387
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Speaker 2: was calling It's always been inside. So fame for me

388
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Speaker 2: was not the I'm going to be rich and famous. Yes,

389
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Speaker 2: that is something that sort of affirms your I don't know,

390
00:19:58,720 --> 00:20:01,640
Speaker 2: your pro jax or whatever it is that you do. Hey,

391
00:20:01,640 --> 00:20:04,399
Speaker 2: people like it, you know, applause. But I didn't do

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Speaker 2: it for the applause. I did it because I fucking

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Speaker 2: loved it, and I love the feeling of being out.

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Speaker 1: There on stage. Yea.

395
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Speaker 2: And even now it's like it's it's great and I'm

396
00:20:15,960 --> 00:20:18,960
Speaker 2: grateful for everything that's happened to me. But there's also

397
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Speaker 2: days where it's like, jeez.

398
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Speaker 1: This is a lot.

399
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Speaker 2: This is a lot. Well, I mean, and I don't

400
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Speaker 2: even have I have a sliver, a sliver of the

401
00:20:27,400 --> 00:20:29,639
Speaker 2: attention of these people that we were talking about early,

402
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Speaker 2: A sliver, you know.

403
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Speaker 1: Well, I mean two years you may have had.

404
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Speaker 2: For two years, I was a roll two years you may,

405
00:20:41,480 --> 00:20:44,280
Speaker 2: but for two years ago I was. Yeah, it was

406
00:20:44,600 --> 00:20:46,800
Speaker 2: and not for all the right reasons. So it would

407
00:20:46,800 --> 00:20:49,199
Speaker 2: be different if it was like, oh, Erica, you were

408
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Speaker 2: celebrated because it was so great.

409
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Speaker 1: We were in the Lion King.

410
00:20:52,200 --> 00:20:54,800
Speaker 2: Yeah, you're in the Lion King and you you really

411
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Speaker 2: killed it, are you?

412
00:20:56,200 --> 00:20:56,400
Speaker 3: Yeah?

413
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Speaker 2: You know that's not what I was sure, It's just

414
00:21:00,080 --> 00:21:02,800
Speaker 2: the Yeah, let me know, it was none of that.

415
00:21:02,920 --> 00:21:05,240
Speaker 2: It was let's make let's let's be on a reality

416
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Speaker 2: TV show. Let's have competitors, competing networks make docs about you.

417
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Speaker 2: Let's have every fucking tabloid write about you, put you

418
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Speaker 2: on everything. And like I said.

419
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Speaker 1: They asked me to be in that doc. By the way, I.

420
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Speaker 2: Was thank you. I really appreciate that. Thank you. You know,

421
00:21:19,600 --> 00:21:21,359
Speaker 2: there was a couple of people that have that reached

422
00:21:21,400 --> 00:21:24,400
Speaker 2: out to me and were like, hey, this came across

423
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Speaker 2: my desk just so you know, no way, Yeah, And

424
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Speaker 2: I appreciate everybody that did that because that's it's like,

425
00:21:30,040 --> 00:21:30,639
Speaker 2: that's gross.

426
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Speaker 1: I mean, granted, I know that on to teasing the

427
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Speaker 1: pot I recaptured, but like, there's a there's a there's

428
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Speaker 1: a good there's a limit. But what do you say

429
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Speaker 1: to people because this was this is the perception that

430
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Speaker 1: you get and I'm I'm talking to not as somebody

431
00:21:45,480 --> 00:21:47,360
Speaker 1: that's one of my good friends, but it's the perception

432
00:21:47,600 --> 00:21:51,159
Speaker 1: of sure, watching on the show, you know, you were married,

433
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Speaker 1: you got a divorce, you you went to go trace

434
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Speaker 1: chase your dream, leave the other stuff behind, and then

435
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Speaker 1: you met an older man who funded the entire who

436
00:22:00,240 --> 00:22:01,720
Speaker 1: funded the entire vanity project?

437
00:22:01,800 --> 00:22:05,040
Speaker 2: Yes, not true. I've been getting paid in the entertainment

438
00:22:05,040 --> 00:22:07,359
Speaker 2: business since i was a little kid, even though it

439
00:22:07,440 --> 00:22:10,160
Speaker 2: was a local you know, in Atlanta, Georgia, where I'm

440
00:22:10,160 --> 00:22:14,560
Speaker 2: born and raised. Yeah, I was working since I was

441
00:22:14,600 --> 00:22:17,560
Speaker 2: little and meaning I wanted to. I wanted to do

442
00:22:17,600 --> 00:22:19,639
Speaker 2: these things, whether it was commercials, whether it was theater

443
00:22:20,119 --> 00:22:24,840
Speaker 2: and being on Housewives did nothing more than take my project,

444
00:22:24,840 --> 00:22:28,520
Speaker 2: which was already on its feet and expose it. Took

445
00:22:28,520 --> 00:22:29,800
Speaker 2: it out of the clubs and took it to a

446
00:22:29,800 --> 00:22:31,040
Speaker 2: more mainstream environment.

447
00:22:31,359 --> 00:22:33,960
Speaker 1: How long were you performing in the clubs and stuff

448
00:22:33,960 --> 00:22:35,440
Speaker 1: before you booked Housewif.

449
00:22:35,480 --> 00:22:37,640
Speaker 2: I started Erica Jane, I want to say, I think

450
00:22:37,720 --> 00:22:40,520
Speaker 2: two thousand and seven was my first record, and then

451
00:22:40,560 --> 00:22:43,480
Speaker 2: I don't know what year I came on, so whatever,

452
00:22:43,600 --> 00:22:45,440
Speaker 2: I don't Yeah.

453
00:22:44,800 --> 00:22:50,360
Speaker 1: But do you think that what was like the when

454
00:22:50,440 --> 00:22:54,320
Speaker 1: you first started with Tom. Was there a time where

455
00:22:54,320 --> 00:22:56,280
Speaker 1: he was like, I don't want you performing or did

456
00:22:56,280 --> 00:22:58,119
Speaker 1: you just mold your life into his?

457
00:22:58,400 --> 00:23:01,200
Speaker 2: I molded my life because what my life was was

458
00:23:01,720 --> 00:23:05,119
Speaker 2: his life was great. Yeah, So I molded my life

459
00:23:05,160 --> 00:23:08,840
Speaker 2: into his life and I and I got exposure to

460
00:23:09,040 --> 00:23:14,640
Speaker 2: an entirely different life, and so that was wonderful until

461
00:23:15,560 --> 00:23:18,639
Speaker 2: you know again here says this need. Yeah, until this

462
00:23:18,760 --> 00:23:21,359
Speaker 2: need to like, hey, I want to create again. I

463
00:23:21,960 --> 00:23:25,160
Speaker 2: feel this again, and I think that that's what happens.

464
00:23:25,160 --> 00:23:27,720
Speaker 2: We step away, we come back, We step away, we

465
00:23:27,840 --> 00:23:30,959
Speaker 2: come back. Was there a defining moment? Yes, there was.

466
00:23:31,000 --> 00:23:35,679
Speaker 2: I received an invitation to a club show of a

467
00:23:35,720 --> 00:23:41,240
Speaker 2: woman that I knew through Tom's social circle. But I

468
00:23:41,280 --> 00:23:43,280
Speaker 2: flipped it over and I saw that it was choreographed

469
00:23:43,320 --> 00:23:45,440
Speaker 2: by one of my dear friends from performing arts high

470
00:23:45,440 --> 00:23:48,240
Speaker 2: school that had worked with like heavily with Michael Jackson

471
00:23:48,280 --> 00:23:50,760
Speaker 2: and everyone else, and I mean like a real fucking

472
00:23:51,560 --> 00:23:55,200
Speaker 2: like a real dancer. And I called him and I said,

473
00:23:55,240 --> 00:23:58,160
Speaker 2: what are you doing on this project? And he literally said,

474
00:23:58,200 --> 00:24:00,960
Speaker 2: oh yeah, you know. He said, well what are you

475
00:24:01,080 --> 00:24:04,480
Speaker 2: doing and I said, well, in terms of like performing

476
00:24:04,520 --> 00:24:06,720
Speaker 2: and I said, well nothing, really, I haven't. It's well,

477
00:24:06,720 --> 00:24:09,080
Speaker 2: if it's possible for her, meaning the invitation, the woman

478
00:24:09,119 --> 00:24:12,920
Speaker 2: on the invitation, is possible for you. So shout out

479
00:24:12,920 --> 00:24:15,800
Speaker 2: to Travis Payne, thank you. And he planted the seed

480
00:24:16,400 --> 00:24:20,320
Speaker 2: and helped me grow Erica Jane and then Mikey and

481
00:24:20,400 --> 00:24:23,159
Speaker 2: I took it and grew it more. So we just

482
00:24:23,320 --> 00:24:27,480
Speaker 2: kept going. And that's the truth. And look my hometown.

483
00:24:29,200 --> 00:24:31,280
Speaker 2: You know, I know, I'm fifty three, but like the

484
00:24:31,400 --> 00:24:34,560
Speaker 2: kids that came up, we came up together and performing

485
00:24:34,560 --> 00:24:38,000
Speaker 2: our school, we turned out some amazing talent, some really

486
00:24:38,040 --> 00:24:40,760
Speaker 2: cool people. I mean you basically when you came out

487
00:24:40,800 --> 00:24:42,960
Speaker 2: of our dance program, you went on tour with Michael

488
00:24:43,040 --> 00:24:46,240
Speaker 2: or Janet, Paula Abdul or you went onto Broadway like

489
00:24:46,280 --> 00:24:48,720
Speaker 2: there was no and let's not forget you did go

490
00:24:48,760 --> 00:24:50,840
Speaker 2: onto Broadway. I did, but much later in my life.

491
00:24:50,840 --> 00:24:54,240
Speaker 2: But like I'm talking straight out of twelfth grade. Yeah,

492
00:24:54,280 --> 00:24:56,400
Speaker 2: they didn't go. They were like right out of there

493
00:24:56,560 --> 00:24:59,400
Speaker 2: on world tours. And that was when you were making money,

494
00:25:00,080 --> 00:25:01,520
Speaker 2: like they were buying houses and shit.

495
00:25:02,200 --> 00:25:04,919
Speaker 1: Do you remember, like what your biggest rejection was.

496
00:25:05,720 --> 00:25:08,119
Speaker 2: I've had so many. I remember people telling me, you know,

497
00:25:08,160 --> 00:25:12,560
Speaker 2: you're not talented, you can't sing, you can't dance. But

498
00:25:13,119 --> 00:25:16,280
Speaker 2: and I was like, no, no, no, no, no, I don't

499
00:25:16,320 --> 00:25:18,880
Speaker 2: think you seem to understand. It's all about also how

500
00:25:18,920 --> 00:25:21,800
Speaker 2: you see yourself as an artist. There are there are

501
00:25:21,800 --> 00:25:24,000
Speaker 2: people that are vocalists, there are people that are dancers.

502
00:25:24,040 --> 00:25:26,640
Speaker 2: There are people that entertain like it's all of that.

503
00:25:26,720 --> 00:25:28,400
Speaker 2: I don't think you are what you think you are

504
00:25:28,520 --> 00:25:31,320
Speaker 2: probably is the biggest rejection.

505
00:25:31,640 --> 00:25:33,200
Speaker 1: What it's your biggest insecurity.

506
00:25:34,600 --> 00:25:40,840
Speaker 2: I think my biggest insecurity sometimes is not feeling prepared.

507
00:25:41,560 --> 00:25:43,640
Speaker 2: I don't know how to explain that any other way

508
00:25:43,920 --> 00:25:47,600
Speaker 2: than not feeling prepared enough. And it's hard to explain,

509
00:25:48,560 --> 00:25:53,200
Speaker 2: but like, have I gone over this enough? Have I?

510
00:25:53,240 --> 00:25:55,679
Speaker 1: And you can see it in your demeanor when you

511
00:25:55,720 --> 00:25:56,440
Speaker 1: don't feel.

512
00:25:56,240 --> 00:25:58,879
Speaker 2: Like you're prepared, yes, And when you don't know, I

513
00:25:59,119 --> 00:26:02,159
Speaker 2: feel like an edgy to And when I don't know,

514
00:26:02,240 --> 00:26:04,159
Speaker 2: I feel like I don't know a piece of music

515
00:26:04,200 --> 00:26:07,680
Speaker 2: well enough, or I haven't worked out the kinks in something,

516
00:26:07,880 --> 00:26:10,719
Speaker 2: or I don't know the choreography well enough, I feel rushed.

517
00:26:11,480 --> 00:26:12,119
Speaker 1: You can see it.

518
00:26:12,400 --> 00:26:15,000
Speaker 2: And because you don't get into that flow state, Yeah,

519
00:26:15,040 --> 00:26:17,359
Speaker 2: you don't get into that relaxed state that people like

520
00:26:18,000 --> 00:26:20,080
Speaker 2: when you can throw away all of the all of

521
00:26:20,119 --> 00:26:22,199
Speaker 2: the stuff and just really live in the moment. And

522
00:26:22,240 --> 00:26:24,600
Speaker 2: that's what I crave the most is living in that

523
00:26:24,640 --> 00:26:26,520
Speaker 2: moment on stage is nothing like it?

524
00:26:26,560 --> 00:26:27,760
Speaker 1: Is it an escape? You think?

525
00:26:28,840 --> 00:26:30,040
Speaker 2: I say that all the time.

526
00:26:30,000 --> 00:26:32,880
Speaker 1: And what was there? And I know I'm grilling Erica

527
00:26:33,000 --> 00:26:35,800
Speaker 1: right now, but I'll switch over it will But like,

528
00:26:36,400 --> 00:26:39,840
Speaker 1: was your would you consider your mom the stage mom?

529
00:26:40,880 --> 00:26:43,640
Speaker 2: Yes, I think that it well, not only my mother,

530
00:26:43,680 --> 00:26:46,760
Speaker 2: but my grandmother. In the best sense possible, I think

531
00:26:46,760 --> 00:26:51,320
Speaker 2: that I was living their unrealized dreams through two generations.

532
00:26:51,720 --> 00:26:55,000
Speaker 2: And there was a moment when I was like, can

533
00:26:55,040 --> 00:26:59,199
Speaker 2: I just because it was constant, like it was company

534
00:26:59,240 --> 00:27:01,359
Speaker 2: rehearsal on the weekend ends and went to performing arts

535
00:27:01,440 --> 00:27:05,600
Speaker 2: high school, you know, can I step back? I'm not really,

536
00:27:06,080 --> 00:27:09,080
Speaker 2: but Erica, if you step back, you lose time. And

537
00:27:09,119 --> 00:27:11,840
Speaker 2: so they instilled a whole lot of sense of urgency

538
00:27:12,080 --> 00:27:12,480
Speaker 2: into me.

539
00:27:14,240 --> 00:27:17,120
Speaker 1: And would you say that, like your mom is still

540
00:27:17,560 --> 00:27:18,520
Speaker 1: involved in your career?

541
00:27:18,720 --> 00:27:21,919
Speaker 2: Yeah? My mom is like that was terrible, and I'm like,

542
00:27:21,960 --> 00:27:25,399
Speaker 2: can you not come? You know, I don't like that.

543
00:27:25,720 --> 00:27:30,000
Speaker 2: I really thought I was like pause pause, personally, are

544
00:27:30,040 --> 00:27:30,480
Speaker 2: you fuck?

545
00:27:30,640 --> 00:27:32,440
Speaker 1: Yeah? I was gonna I was about I thought you

546
00:27:32,480 --> 00:27:33,240
Speaker 1: were gonna say fuck now.

547
00:27:33,280 --> 00:27:37,520
Speaker 2: I was like, no, if anyone can strike at my

548
00:27:37,920 --> 00:27:41,520
Speaker 2: the deepest, most open wound of myself, it's my mother.

549
00:27:42,200 --> 00:27:44,600
Speaker 2: And you can see it on the show. You can

550
00:27:44,640 --> 00:27:47,560
Speaker 2: see how I just start to turn on her because

551
00:27:49,240 --> 00:27:53,840
Speaker 2: that mouth of hers is ruthless because it cuts me

552
00:27:53,840 --> 00:27:54,840
Speaker 2: in a way that nobody can.

553
00:27:54,960 --> 00:27:55,679
Speaker 1: Yeah. Yeah, and.

554
00:27:57,600 --> 00:28:00,879
Speaker 2: Is not nice at all, very ugly, very ugly. And

555
00:28:00,880 --> 00:28:03,120
Speaker 2: I've shown that and I've tried really hard to work

556
00:28:03,160 --> 00:28:05,879
Speaker 2: on it. I really have. I discussed it in therapy,

557
00:28:05,880 --> 00:28:10,600
Speaker 2: I've talked about it with my mother. It's just something

558
00:28:10,640 --> 00:28:12,320
Speaker 2: I have to get over. Yeah, you know, something that

559
00:28:12,320 --> 00:28:14,880
Speaker 2: I have to get over. I also say that follow

560
00:28:14,960 --> 00:28:39,200
Speaker 2: your dreams.

561
00:28:28,080 --> 00:28:30,720
Speaker 1: How did you pick the name Erica Jane?

562
00:28:31,000 --> 00:28:35,080
Speaker 2: Shit, I couldn't come up with anything else. I mean,

563
00:28:35,119 --> 00:28:37,720
Speaker 2: it's really not that deep. I just wanted to be Erica,

564
00:28:37,840 --> 00:28:41,760
Speaker 2: you know, because I thought that disconnecting from I didn't

565
00:28:41,760 --> 00:28:44,040
Speaker 2: want to be Erica da. You know, you don't want

566
00:28:44,040 --> 00:28:45,760
Speaker 2: to be a real name, Like that's not exciting. The thing,

567
00:28:45,840 --> 00:28:47,760
Speaker 2: the whole thing about being an artist or having an

568
00:28:47,840 --> 00:28:50,880
Speaker 2: artistic project is escapism. I've always said Erica Jane was

569
00:28:50,880 --> 00:28:52,920
Speaker 2: an escape artist. It was an escape from all life

570
00:28:52,960 --> 00:28:55,840
Speaker 2: that I was living at that time. Fantasy, love, escape, glitz,

571
00:28:55,840 --> 00:29:00,360
Speaker 2: glamor of fine illw my six words to describe Erica Jane.

572
00:29:00,520 --> 00:29:02,800
Speaker 2: But it was the only thing that we came up

573
00:29:02,840 --> 00:29:06,520
Speaker 2: with at the time. I don't have some magical sort

574
00:29:06,520 --> 00:29:09,520
Speaker 2: of Is it inspired by Jane Mansfield? Sure?

575
00:29:11,000 --> 00:29:15,200
Speaker 1: I mean, but it's funny that you say that. As

576
00:29:15,480 --> 00:29:20,280
Speaker 1: you said that, you know you wanted that name getting

577
00:29:20,320 --> 00:29:23,760
Speaker 1: into nepotism in my dad he wanted to get away

578
00:29:23,840 --> 00:29:25,200
Speaker 1: from his stage name.

579
00:29:25,680 --> 00:29:25,960
Speaker 2: Really.

580
00:29:26,080 --> 00:29:29,600
Speaker 1: Yeah, they you know, back when he first started coming up,

581
00:29:29,640 --> 00:29:33,280
Speaker 1: they gave him Johnny Couger, That's right, and then he

582
00:29:33,400 --> 00:29:36,280
Speaker 1: spent years and years and years of his life trying

583
00:29:36,280 --> 00:29:38,440
Speaker 1: to be John Mellencamp, fighting it. So then it went

584
00:29:38,480 --> 00:29:41,680
Speaker 1: from Johnny Couger to John Couger to John Cougar Mellencamp.

585
00:29:41,720 --> 00:29:43,640
Speaker 2: You know, like how old was your father when he

586
00:29:43,720 --> 00:29:45,400
Speaker 2: was signed? Like his first his.

587
00:29:45,520 --> 00:29:48,280
Speaker 1: First big hit was in nineteen eighty one, the year

588
00:29:48,320 --> 00:29:50,240
Speaker 1: I was born. So, I mean those could see it.

589
00:29:50,360 --> 00:29:53,040
Speaker 3: Jack and Diane, I think it was Jack and Diane

590
00:29:53,080 --> 00:29:56,120
Speaker 3: and it was that album I remember was thirty six

591
00:29:56,480 --> 00:29:58,960
Speaker 3: and I can see the album cover in my head

592
00:29:59,040 --> 00:30:01,360
Speaker 3: and I can remember that that song was.

593
00:30:01,720 --> 00:30:04,320
Speaker 2: I mean you talk about heavy rotation like that song

594
00:30:04,440 --> 00:30:05,040
Speaker 2: was a funny.

595
00:30:05,080 --> 00:30:07,440
Speaker 1: It's a smash. Yeah. And that's my mom in the video.

596
00:30:07,840 --> 00:30:10,440
Speaker 2: Oh my gosh, I'm going on tonight? Is it really?

597
00:30:10,680 --> 00:30:10,880
Speaker 1: Yeah?

598
00:30:10,880 --> 00:30:11,560
Speaker 2: That's OK.

599
00:30:13,120 --> 00:30:16,240
Speaker 1: That's my mom sucking on chili dogs outside.

600
00:30:15,880 --> 00:30:20,400
Speaker 2: The tastey freeze and to think. But I and when

601
00:30:20,400 --> 00:30:23,160
Speaker 2: I met you, I was like, wow, I've listened to

602
00:30:23,200 --> 00:30:24,640
Speaker 2: her dad like for forever.

603
00:30:25,280 --> 00:30:29,160
Speaker 1: But it is funny, I mean, the way people you know,

604
00:30:29,200 --> 00:30:32,200
Speaker 1: there's an escapism version, and then there's also the part

605
00:30:32,240 --> 00:30:36,920
Speaker 1: of like when you when you want, when you want

606
00:30:37,320 --> 00:30:40,320
Speaker 1: to achieve your goals, you may sign on and do

607
00:30:40,480 --> 00:30:44,160
Speaker 1: anything right even if it's not something you want to. Well.

608
00:30:44,200 --> 00:30:46,760
Speaker 2: I think that that's also how that business was and

609
00:30:47,080 --> 00:30:49,640
Speaker 2: is still is that they change and mold you to

610
00:30:49,800 --> 00:30:52,920
Speaker 2: what is palatable and what sells. I mean, and now

611
00:30:53,280 --> 00:30:55,840
Speaker 2: now it's the complete opposite. If you're not your authentic self,

612
00:30:55,840 --> 00:30:56,600
Speaker 2: you're not selling shit.

613
00:30:57,280 --> 00:30:59,520
Speaker 1: So I mean they did the same thing with like

614
00:30:59,720 --> 00:31:00,960
Speaker 1: you know, old Hollywood movies.

615
00:31:01,200 --> 00:31:03,400
Speaker 2: Nobody was her real name, Marilyn Monroe was not her name.

616
00:31:03,680 --> 00:31:07,360
Speaker 2: Norma Jean Martinsen was you know, Marilyn Monroe, Rita Cansino

617
00:31:07,560 --> 00:31:08,400
Speaker 2: was Rita Hayworth.

618
00:31:08,480 --> 00:31:12,440
Speaker 1: Yeah, And they would be signed onto one particular you

619
00:31:12,480 --> 00:31:14,640
Speaker 1: know studio, and I had to do all the movies

620
00:31:14,640 --> 00:31:16,240
Speaker 1: within that, and then they get loaned out.

621
00:31:16,320 --> 00:31:18,400
Speaker 2: Yeah, and they would get loaned out. So I mean

622
00:31:18,440 --> 00:31:23,080
Speaker 2: it's kind of like being on Brava. I'm just chidding,

623
00:31:23,480 --> 00:31:25,880
Speaker 2: my god, nobody wants to borrow.

624
00:31:25,600 --> 00:31:26,480
Speaker 1: You right now.

625
00:31:26,960 --> 00:31:29,280
Speaker 2: Don't you ever say that again in my presence. I'm

626
00:31:29,280 --> 00:31:31,160
Speaker 2: telling you better stop talking negatively.

627
00:31:31,680 --> 00:31:33,600
Speaker 1: I have if I didn't laugh at myself.

628
00:31:33,640 --> 00:31:36,320
Speaker 2: No, but there's there's a limit. Okay, fine, okay, you

629
00:31:36,360 --> 00:31:40,360
Speaker 2: can have that's it. That's your one stop deprecating. Do

630
00:31:40,400 --> 00:31:41,000
Speaker 2: not say that again.

631
00:31:41,040 --> 00:31:42,960
Speaker 1: I do appreciate that, at least, you know when I'm

632
00:31:43,000 --> 00:31:45,480
Speaker 1: being self deprecating now versus when we first met and

633
00:31:45,520 --> 00:31:46,080
Speaker 1: you were just.

634
00:31:46,000 --> 00:31:49,640
Speaker 2: Like, gosh, well that's also Look, how do you know

635
00:31:49,680 --> 00:31:54,080
Speaker 2: what I How do you feel right now now that

636
00:31:54,160 --> 00:31:57,520
Speaker 2: you're so you know, all of this really glaring attention

637
00:31:57,680 --> 00:31:59,800
Speaker 2: is turned onto you. How do you feel I mean,

638
00:32:00,520 --> 00:32:02,320
Speaker 2: and I mean this genuinely, like I'm not trying to

639
00:32:02,320 --> 00:32:08,360
Speaker 2: bullshit you, Like, how do you feel about what were

640
00:32:08,400 --> 00:32:11,440
Speaker 2: your hopes and dreams as a performer and now you've

641
00:32:11,440 --> 00:32:15,800
Speaker 2: never been bigger? Being known for something that's painful? Yeah,

642
00:32:15,840 --> 00:32:16,520
Speaker 2: and that sucks.

643
00:32:16,760 --> 00:32:20,040
Speaker 1: It sucks. I would say that like when I first

644
00:32:20,160 --> 00:32:23,480
Speaker 1: came out to California, you know, I had grown up

645
00:32:23,560 --> 00:32:28,400
Speaker 1: riding horses, and I got all of my I don't

646
00:32:28,440 --> 00:32:31,640
Speaker 1: know my confidence by winning getting those blue ribbons. Well,

647
00:32:31,680 --> 00:32:33,880
Speaker 1: you were a professional as a teenager. People don't realize this, Ted,

648
00:32:33,920 --> 00:32:36,560
Speaker 1: he was a professionalist team. Yeah, like I was, you

649
00:32:36,600 --> 00:32:38,959
Speaker 1: know one at Madison Square Garden. It was it was

650
00:32:39,120 --> 00:32:42,040
Speaker 1: my entire life. And then I had gotten a full

651
00:32:42,120 --> 00:32:46,200
Speaker 1: ride to college. But in contingent with riding on the team.

652
00:32:46,520 --> 00:32:49,360
Speaker 1: When I said it was by the way, I don't

653
00:32:49,360 --> 00:32:52,880
Speaker 1: want to say, okay, but to ride on the team.

654
00:32:52,880 --> 00:32:55,040
Speaker 1: But then when I said that, I wouldn't I didn't

655
00:32:55,040 --> 00:32:56,640
Speaker 1: want to ride on the team because I was an

656
00:32:56,640 --> 00:32:58,760
Speaker 1: idiot seventeen year old and said I don't want to

657
00:32:58,840 --> 00:33:01,640
Speaker 1: ride on the college team because collegiate riding as a step.

658
00:33:01,640 --> 00:33:03,640
Speaker 1: But it just was a stupid It's a fucking man,

659
00:33:03,880 --> 00:33:05,480
Speaker 1: It's okay. But then they were like, well then we

660
00:33:05,480 --> 00:33:07,600
Speaker 1: don't want you. You have shitty grades.

661
00:33:08,320 --> 00:33:10,000
Speaker 2: The mean we got you over here is because you

662
00:33:10,080 --> 00:33:10,440
Speaker 2: were good.

663
00:33:11,480 --> 00:33:13,960
Speaker 1: And that's when I decided to move to California and

664
00:33:14,120 --> 00:33:16,880
Speaker 1: I my parents were like, well, yeah, I mean you can.

665
00:33:16,960 --> 00:33:19,040
Speaker 1: And they were divorced at this time, a million years

666
00:33:19,080 --> 00:33:20,000
Speaker 1: and you know we did.

667
00:33:20,000 --> 00:33:21,720
Speaker 2: They say to you, how dare you turn down a

668
00:33:21,760 --> 00:33:24,560
Speaker 2: full ride? I can't imagine your dad being like, hey,

669
00:33:24,560 --> 00:33:25,520
Speaker 2: what's wrong with you? Yeah?

670
00:33:25,560 --> 00:33:27,719
Speaker 1: And I mean and then he was like, well that's fine.

671
00:33:27,960 --> 00:33:29,680
Speaker 1: If you're gonna if you don't want to ride in college,

672
00:33:29,720 --> 00:33:33,280
Speaker 1: well I you will still take you. And I was like, well,

673
00:33:33,440 --> 00:33:35,520
Speaker 1: I'm not going. I'm going to California. I want to

674
00:33:35,520 --> 00:33:36,280
Speaker 1: be an actress.

675
00:33:36,440 --> 00:33:37,280
Speaker 2: Is that what you wanted to be?

676
00:33:37,400 --> 00:33:40,479
Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean I didn't, but I didn't really I

677
00:33:40,600 --> 00:33:43,760
Speaker 1: just wanted to be seen, Okay, I get it. It

678
00:33:43,800 --> 00:33:46,080
Speaker 1: wasn't like I was in acting school for all these years.

679
00:33:46,120 --> 00:33:48,760
Speaker 1: I mean, I probably you know, I mess. I met

680
00:33:48,760 --> 00:33:51,240
Speaker 1: my I started at CA in the mailroom. I met

681
00:33:51,240 --> 00:33:54,120
Speaker 1: my first roommate and my first acting class i'd ever taken.

682
00:33:54,200 --> 00:33:55,800
Speaker 2: Did your dad get you the job at CIA? In

683
00:33:55,800 --> 00:33:56,320
Speaker 2: the mail room?

684
00:33:56,480 --> 00:33:59,600
Speaker 1: He got me that interview, baby, He got me that

685
00:33:59,680 --> 00:34:02,480
Speaker 1: interview with Arlene Newman. May she rest in peace.

686
00:34:02,720 --> 00:34:05,560
Speaker 2: Well, it's not like you were doing anything interesting other

687
00:34:05,600 --> 00:34:08,680
Speaker 2: than delivering the mail, which is, as everybody knows, the

688
00:34:08,760 --> 00:34:09,760
Speaker 2: key starting position.

689
00:34:09,880 --> 00:34:12,319
Speaker 1: It is the key. I was the only person in

690
00:34:12,360 --> 00:34:15,160
Speaker 1: the mail room that hadn't graduated from an Ivy League college.

691
00:34:15,320 --> 00:34:17,560
Speaker 1: So it was a touch of nepotism that got good

692
00:34:17,640 --> 00:34:21,840
Speaker 1: for you. But then I got myself on a partner's desk.

693
00:34:22,120 --> 00:34:24,000
Speaker 1: Hell yeah. So after a year of being in the

694
00:34:24,000 --> 00:34:26,520
Speaker 1: mayroom all of those things, I worked my way up

695
00:34:26,520 --> 00:34:31,880
Speaker 1: and kind of became that quirky, self deprecating taty joe

696
00:34:31,920 --> 00:34:35,520
Speaker 1: that everybody kind of wanted. Sure, they were like on

697
00:34:35,600 --> 00:34:37,480
Speaker 1: their desk, Yeah, we want you, we want you to

698
00:34:37,520 --> 00:34:39,560
Speaker 1: work for me. And it taught me a lot. And

699
00:34:40,320 --> 00:34:45,400
Speaker 1: it also taught me that I came from being a

700
00:34:45,440 --> 00:34:48,960
Speaker 1: big fish in a small pond to the smallest fish

701
00:34:49,160 --> 00:34:52,320
Speaker 1: and the biggest ocean, and the ocean.

702
00:34:51,960 --> 00:34:55,440
Speaker 2: And the fucking the ocean intimating out here, yeah, well anywhere,

703
00:34:55,440 --> 00:34:56,759
Speaker 2: but you know, it can get intimidating.

704
00:34:56,960 --> 00:34:59,520
Speaker 1: And I, you know, had We've talked about this, but

705
00:34:59,520 --> 00:35:03,960
Speaker 1: I had grown up with eating issues and body dysmorphia

706
00:35:04,000 --> 00:35:06,200
Speaker 1: and all that kind of stuff that comes with riding

707
00:35:06,239 --> 00:35:09,520
Speaker 1: horses and skin tight beige pants and well did you

708
00:35:09,560 --> 00:35:11,359
Speaker 1: have to weigh in for those things? You don't have

709
00:35:11,400 --> 00:35:14,279
Speaker 1: to weigh in and hunter jumper, But it's like you're

710
00:35:14,320 --> 00:35:16,000
Speaker 1: almost rewarded for.

711
00:35:16,160 --> 00:35:18,800
Speaker 2: Being tiny and small and looking like you don't exist

712
00:35:18,800 --> 00:35:20,400
Speaker 2: on the horse, and especially.

713
00:35:20,000 --> 00:35:21,880
Speaker 1: When you're somebody that's my height and I don't have

714
00:35:21,960 --> 00:35:22,520
Speaker 1: long legs.

715
00:35:22,600 --> 00:35:23,959
Speaker 2: Yeah, you have to be teeny tiny.

716
00:35:24,120 --> 00:35:26,440
Speaker 1: Yeah, like, so it was kind of that. And then

717
00:35:26,480 --> 00:35:29,680
Speaker 1: I came out to California and I'd gone to the

718
00:35:29,719 --> 00:35:32,600
Speaker 1: same school from third grade till twelfth grade, so like,

719
00:35:32,960 --> 00:35:34,919
Speaker 1: and I rode with the same people, so I never

720
00:35:35,000 --> 00:35:38,239
Speaker 1: had to kind of make new friends. Oh shit, And

721
00:35:38,280 --> 00:35:40,400
Speaker 1: all of a sudden, I'm out here to tell me,

722
00:35:41,320 --> 00:35:45,319
Speaker 1: I'm like, oh, hell, you know, and I'm I'm living

723
00:35:45,400 --> 00:35:47,759
Speaker 1: in the studio apartment, barely making do.

724
00:35:48,200 --> 00:35:50,560
Speaker 2: Like, let's just say that your dad gave you no money.

725
00:35:51,320 --> 00:35:54,160
Speaker 2: You're not feeling this part of the story. Your father said, fuck.

726
00:35:54,000 --> 00:35:56,400
Speaker 1: You, he gave they My parents gave me my Jetta.

727
00:35:56,920 --> 00:35:59,279
Speaker 1: We packed that jetts, got rid of the Grimlin, we

728
00:35:59,320 --> 00:36:02,520
Speaker 1: got rid of the Gremlin, I got the Jetta, We

729
00:36:02,560 --> 00:36:04,719
Speaker 1: shifted out, and then that was that was the end

730
00:36:04,760 --> 00:36:04,960
Speaker 1: of it.

731
00:36:05,000 --> 00:36:05,799
Speaker 2: That was good luck.

732
00:36:05,920 --> 00:36:06,480
Speaker 1: You figured out.

733
00:36:06,520 --> 00:36:09,720
Speaker 2: You figured it out, which is kind of it's great,

734
00:36:09,800 --> 00:36:12,239
Speaker 2: but it's also like, could you imagine turning slate loose

735
00:36:12,320 --> 00:36:13,960
Speaker 2: right in a few years and being like, go work

736
00:36:13,960 --> 00:36:17,239
Speaker 2: it out? No, but not, I mean think about that,

737
00:36:17,480 --> 00:36:19,320
Speaker 2: they basically say, and that you go.

738
00:36:19,640 --> 00:36:21,600
Speaker 1: But I mean to be perfectly honest and that I'm

739
00:36:21,640 --> 00:36:24,319
Speaker 1: not trying to like shit on my mom. But I

740
00:36:24,320 --> 00:36:25,799
Speaker 1: had been kind of figuring it out.

741
00:36:26,120 --> 00:36:28,200
Speaker 2: Yeah yeah, your whole life, My.

742
00:36:28,200 --> 00:36:31,840
Speaker 1: Whole life, you know, so that part was but adding

743
00:36:31,880 --> 00:36:35,360
Speaker 1: in that like loneliness of being in a big place.

744
00:36:35,440 --> 00:36:38,799
Speaker 1: And then that's when I kind of, I guess, in

745
00:36:38,880 --> 00:36:40,840
Speaker 1: lack of a better way of saying, it started eating

746
00:36:40,840 --> 00:36:45,960
Speaker 1: my feelings. And I remember that first. You know, at

747
00:36:45,960 --> 00:36:49,239
Speaker 1: this point, I come out to LA, I get you know,

748
00:36:49,320 --> 00:36:51,400
Speaker 1: things are going all right. I'm making a couple of friends,

749
00:36:51,560 --> 00:36:52,000
Speaker 1: I'm doing.

750
00:36:51,920 --> 00:36:52,520
Speaker 2: At the job.

751
00:36:52,680 --> 00:36:55,399
Speaker 1: I got the job, I got a manager. I got

752
00:36:55,400 --> 00:36:58,000
Speaker 1: those head shots with like the belly button piercing that

753
00:36:58,040 --> 00:37:02,520
Speaker 1: I had just gotten, you know, like my pencil thin eyebrows.

754
00:37:03,480 --> 00:37:04,360
Speaker 1: And then that's when.

755
00:37:04,280 --> 00:37:05,600
Speaker 2: Did you go to class? Did you study?

756
00:37:05,680 --> 00:37:07,320
Speaker 1: I did I see study?

757
00:37:07,880 --> 00:37:08,880
Speaker 2: Yes? Uh?

758
00:37:09,120 --> 00:37:11,879
Speaker 1: Not Stey what what? Yes?

759
00:37:11,920 --> 00:37:12,080
Speaker 2: What?

760
00:37:12,080 --> 00:37:12,560
Speaker 1: What helped me?

761
00:37:12,680 --> 00:37:14,480
Speaker 2: I was going to say Stella Adler because it sounded

762
00:37:14,480 --> 00:37:15,520
Speaker 2: like you were going to say that, but that doesn't

763
00:37:15,520 --> 00:37:15,920
Speaker 2: sound right.

764
00:37:15,960 --> 00:37:19,160
Speaker 1: It's not. It was Stella Adler later, but before that

765
00:37:19,320 --> 00:37:21,920
Speaker 1: it was I don't know because I didn't go I'm

766
00:37:21,920 --> 00:37:24,960
Speaker 1: not I'm going to hear but either or I mean,

767
00:37:25,960 --> 00:37:28,040
Speaker 1: it was like a chorus line pretend to be a tree.

768
00:37:28,520 --> 00:37:31,520
Speaker 2: You know how I love that? How what the fuck

769
00:37:31,600 --> 00:37:33,120
Speaker 2: is the tree? Like, I've never even thought about that.

770
00:37:33,320 --> 00:37:35,920
Speaker 1: Explain how you'd feel if you were the Hollywood sign.

771
00:37:37,520 --> 00:37:39,759
Speaker 2: Old and dilapidated with.

772
00:37:39,760 --> 00:37:42,480
Speaker 1: The l missing, because somebody, that's what I was saying,

773
00:37:42,520 --> 00:37:46,319
Speaker 1: anybody I jumped off. But yeah, and then there was

774
00:37:46,360 --> 00:37:49,040
Speaker 1: a moment where I was going on auditions and I

775
00:37:49,120 --> 00:37:51,680
Speaker 1: was also I was a hostess at Mister Chow and

776
00:37:51,680 --> 00:37:54,080
Speaker 1: your O Chow, and things were just kind of spiraling.

777
00:37:54,320 --> 00:37:56,359
Speaker 1: I booked the job. I talked about this on the show,

778
00:37:57,960 --> 00:38:02,839
Speaker 1: and then after pilot season, we kind of started like

779
00:38:02,960 --> 00:38:04,880
Speaker 1: we had that second round. We're like, we're all about

780
00:38:04,920 --> 00:38:08,240
Speaker 1: to start filming the pilot and I had gained probably

781
00:38:08,280 --> 00:38:09,040
Speaker 1: fifty pounds.

782
00:38:09,160 --> 00:38:10,400
Speaker 2: Oh no, yeah, I remember.

783
00:38:10,520 --> 00:38:14,759
Speaker 1: Yes, they called their manager and said she either needs

784
00:38:14,800 --> 00:38:16,319
Speaker 1: to lose weight or we're going to fire her. We're

785
00:38:16,360 --> 00:38:20,239
Speaker 1: going to fire And I never recovered from that. I

786
00:38:20,280 --> 00:38:22,719
Speaker 1: never recovered from it. And I also never went on

787
00:38:22,760 --> 00:38:23,880
Speaker 1: another audition again.

788
00:38:24,320 --> 00:38:25,279
Speaker 2: Yeah, it took it out of you.

789
00:38:25,480 --> 00:38:27,520
Speaker 1: Yeah, Like I was like that, and then I was

790
00:38:27,680 --> 00:38:31,440
Speaker 1: so bitter of course about.

791
00:38:31,160 --> 00:38:33,640
Speaker 2: It and demoralized. I mean, Jesus Christ, could you imagine

792
00:38:33,680 --> 00:38:34,799
Speaker 2: lose fifty pounds that we're going to.

793
00:38:34,800 --> 00:38:36,279
Speaker 1: Fucking fire you. Yeah, like we're done.

794
00:38:37,000 --> 00:38:39,560
Speaker 2: The girl that we hired is not the girl that's

795
00:38:39,800 --> 00:38:40,920
Speaker 2: showing up here. Yeah.

796
00:38:41,000 --> 00:38:45,000
Speaker 1: And then it just became, you know, fifteen years of

797
00:38:45,040 --> 00:38:49,680
Speaker 1: living in California and you know, just putzing around trying

798
00:38:49,719 --> 00:38:52,600
Speaker 1: to figure out what I was going to do. You know,

799
00:38:52,719 --> 00:38:56,560
Speaker 1: like I worked in agencies, I went and the fact that.

800
00:38:56,480 --> 00:38:59,880
Speaker 2: You never went on an audition again is so crushing.

801
00:39:00,040 --> 00:39:02,400
Speaker 2: That just lets me know how deeply that wounded you.

802
00:39:02,640 --> 00:39:04,480
Speaker 1: Yeah, And I mean I remember going home for that

803
00:39:04,560 --> 00:39:10,000
Speaker 1: Thanksgiving like that that year after, and I just had

804
00:39:10,120 --> 00:39:13,680
Speaker 1: kept gaining more and more weight, and I just remember,

805
00:39:14,400 --> 00:39:17,920
Speaker 1: this is not judgment of my family, but I remember

806
00:39:18,000 --> 00:39:20,520
Speaker 1: walking in in my family's faces because there was an

807
00:39:20,560 --> 00:39:21,840
Speaker 1: Instagram then, so.

808
00:39:21,920 --> 00:39:23,879
Speaker 2: They were like shocked when you walked through the door.

809
00:39:24,040 --> 00:39:25,200
Speaker 1: Yeah, they were shocked.

810
00:39:25,239 --> 00:39:26,759
Speaker 2: And it was not in a good way.

811
00:39:26,920 --> 00:39:31,920
Speaker 1: Not not in a good way. And so that's kind

812
00:39:31,960 --> 00:39:34,480
Speaker 1: of always carried with me. But then, you know, you

813
00:39:34,600 --> 00:39:38,040
Speaker 1: take that pain and to transmute it, and you transmute

814
00:39:38,040 --> 00:39:40,759
Speaker 1: it and I kind of started finding my way and

815
00:39:40,800 --> 00:39:43,080
Speaker 1: then you know, I lost it again. And that's and

816
00:39:43,120 --> 00:39:45,520
Speaker 1: that's really the long, the long and short of it

817
00:39:45,600 --> 00:39:47,960
Speaker 1: is my life has been this and and so is.

818
00:39:47,920 --> 00:39:50,160
Speaker 2: Yours, of course, And I think that that's, you know,

819
00:39:50,200 --> 00:39:52,200
Speaker 2: I hate to be so cliche, but that's also like

820
00:39:52,280 --> 00:39:54,759
Speaker 2: I'm gonna and you guys can criticize us later. That's

821
00:39:54,800 --> 00:39:57,759
Speaker 2: the hero's journey, I mean, because you have it, you

822
00:39:57,840 --> 00:40:00,600
Speaker 2: lose it, you regain it. You you know, you're mad,

823
00:40:00,760 --> 00:40:04,520
Speaker 2: you're sad, you're bitter, but you overcome and then things change.

824
00:40:04,880 --> 00:40:07,520
Speaker 2: The most important thing I think for me, and I

825
00:40:07,560 --> 00:40:10,040
Speaker 2: think for you, is to like I told you, you can

826
00:40:10,080 --> 00:40:14,239
Speaker 2: do anything but quit, and you will again take this

827
00:40:14,360 --> 00:40:17,640
Speaker 2: challenge and overcome and make it something else. And I

828
00:40:17,640 --> 00:40:20,680
Speaker 2: think the way that you've you were on housewives and

829
00:40:20,719 --> 00:40:24,600
Speaker 2: then you took that and turned yourself into a really

830
00:40:24,640 --> 00:40:27,480
Speaker 2: great podcaster and you've had a lot of success is

831
00:40:27,520 --> 00:40:30,839
Speaker 2: not only it's very admirable, but so many people would

832
00:40:30,840 --> 00:40:32,840
Speaker 2: have walked off in defeat and you didn't do that.

833
00:40:33,200 --> 00:40:35,400
Speaker 2: And you have to you have to acknowledge that in

834
00:40:35,440 --> 00:40:39,359
Speaker 2: yourself that you've created something else out of that, and

835
00:40:39,400 --> 00:40:42,200
Speaker 2: you'll create something else out of this experience.

836
00:40:42,400 --> 00:40:45,200
Speaker 1: And I have to also like tell you, thank you.

837
00:40:45,280 --> 00:40:47,560
Speaker 1: I'm gonna get it a much right now. I have

838
00:40:47,600 --> 00:40:50,479
Speaker 1: to tell you thank you because it it didn't mean

839
00:40:50,560 --> 00:40:52,759
Speaker 1: a lot to me that you said yes to me,

840
00:40:53,320 --> 00:40:55,920
Speaker 1: of course, and it did mean a lot to me

841
00:40:56,000 --> 00:40:59,480
Speaker 1: because there are so many people that want to jump

842
00:40:59,480 --> 00:41:03,080
Speaker 1: on the bed wagon, yeah, of hating or making you

843
00:41:03,120 --> 00:41:06,399
Speaker 1: feel like you're less than or not enough. And I

844
00:41:06,440 --> 00:41:10,080
Speaker 1: think that the fact that you chose our connection over

845
00:41:10,120 --> 00:41:13,600
Speaker 1: what other people thought is why this became so successful.

846
00:41:13,840 --> 00:41:16,480
Speaker 1: And I really really appreciated it, and like you did

847
00:41:16,520 --> 00:41:18,560
Speaker 1: it at a time that like you really didn't have to.

848
00:41:18,719 --> 00:41:21,080
Speaker 2: Yeah, But I am your friend, Yeah, And I also

849
00:41:21,120 --> 00:41:23,640
Speaker 2: have been where you are, and I also know that

850
00:41:23,719 --> 00:41:27,920
Speaker 2: this too shall pass, And I believe in you, and

851
00:41:28,000 --> 00:41:32,360
Speaker 2: I respect you, and I know that you will overcome

852
00:41:32,520 --> 00:41:35,439
Speaker 2: because you are a hard fucking worker and you've never

853
00:41:35,480 --> 00:41:38,799
Speaker 2: allowed anything since I've known you to take you to

854
00:41:38,840 --> 00:41:41,479
Speaker 2: a place where you didn't fight back and fight back

855
00:41:41,560 --> 00:41:43,719
Speaker 2: on your own behalf. And so I'm very proud of

856
00:41:43,880 --> 00:41:44,239
Speaker 2: thank you.

857
00:41:44,280 --> 00:41:46,440
Speaker 1: And I mean, we may fight back the wrong way.

858
00:41:46,880 --> 00:41:49,759
Speaker 2: But nobody's perfect, and you are a human being, and

859
00:41:49,800 --> 00:41:53,080
Speaker 2: you're allowed to have these sort of experiences. The difference

860
00:41:53,080 --> 00:41:56,000
Speaker 2: between us and others is that ours is in the

861
00:41:56,000 --> 00:41:58,880
Speaker 2: public and people get to enjoy cheer us on or

862
00:41:58,920 --> 00:42:02,160
Speaker 2: criticize us. It's all good at the end of the day. Yeah,

863
00:42:02,280 --> 00:42:02,920
Speaker 2: now I have.

864
00:42:02,920 --> 00:42:21,520
Speaker 1: A tear, I know. Okay, So our next question that

865
00:42:21,560 --> 00:42:23,080
Speaker 1: people are asking.

866
00:42:26,560 --> 00:42:28,520
Speaker 2: I think, like, why did you both want to become

867
00:42:28,560 --> 00:42:31,880
Speaker 2: a housewife? Did you ever watch reality TV before? I

868
00:42:31,880 --> 00:42:32,160
Speaker 2: did not?

869
00:42:32,320 --> 00:42:33,920
Speaker 1: You know, I did not watch this show before I

870
00:42:33,920 --> 00:42:36,399
Speaker 1: got I didn't either, But people never believe me when

871
00:42:36,400 --> 00:42:36,840
Speaker 1: I say that.

872
00:42:36,960 --> 00:42:38,960
Speaker 2: They didn't for me either. I said I knew who

873
00:42:39,000 --> 00:42:40,880
Speaker 2: the women were because at that time.

874
00:42:41,120 --> 00:42:42,680
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, people always going to say, we saw that

875
00:42:42,719 --> 00:42:45,080
Speaker 1: picture of you and Kyle when you're in like the.

876
00:42:45,080 --> 00:42:51,759
Speaker 2: Air, Yeah we met its two completely different noses and

877
00:42:51,960 --> 00:42:55,399
Speaker 2: knows ago Yeah, no to both of us, by the way.

878
00:42:55,440 --> 00:42:57,360
Speaker 2: And she doesn't care that I say this, but a

879
00:42:57,440 --> 00:43:01,160
Speaker 2: nos ago and yeah, I had met her at some

880
00:43:01,600 --> 00:43:04,680
Speaker 2: party and she was kind of she was the thing

881
00:43:04,719 --> 00:43:07,480
Speaker 2: about Kyle people don't understand. And I said this a

882
00:43:07,480 --> 00:43:10,400
Speaker 2: long time ago. Kyle had grew up in this business.

883
00:43:10,560 --> 00:43:13,160
Speaker 2: But she doesn't take it that seriously. Do you know

884
00:43:13,200 --> 00:43:15,760
Speaker 2: what I'm saying? Like, Oh, I you know, she's always

885
00:43:15,800 --> 00:43:18,719
Speaker 2: been friendly to strangers and to everyone else. And she

886
00:43:18,960 --> 00:43:20,480
Speaker 2: and so she was I was a stranger. She took

887
00:43:20,520 --> 00:43:22,360
Speaker 2: a picture with me. There you go. That's all it is.

888
00:43:22,440 --> 00:43:24,600
Speaker 1: Yeah. People try to make it like, oh, she's been

889
00:43:24,680 --> 00:43:27,560
Speaker 1: dying to get on the show for years because this

890
00:43:27,719 --> 00:43:28,400
Speaker 1: one photo.

891
00:43:28,680 --> 00:43:31,160
Speaker 2: No, No, it's kind of bizarre. I would have never

892
00:43:31,160 --> 00:43:32,360
Speaker 2: seen myself on a show like this.

893
00:43:32,560 --> 00:43:33,960
Speaker 1: So how did you actually?

894
00:43:34,920 --> 00:43:38,120
Speaker 2: I told you I, Tom and I were friends with

895
00:43:38,520 --> 00:43:41,759
Speaker 2: David Foster and Yolanda. We had gone out to their

896
00:43:41,760 --> 00:43:44,640
Speaker 2: house one day and she came down not feeling great

897
00:43:44,719 --> 00:43:46,640
Speaker 2: in her robe. She was very sick, and we were

898
00:43:46,680 --> 00:43:48,680
Speaker 2: all talking, the four of us, and she literally said,

899
00:43:48,840 --> 00:43:51,359
Speaker 2: have you thought about being a housewife? And I said no,

900
00:43:52,200 --> 00:43:54,719
Speaker 2: And she said, I'm texting my boss. We've already kind

901
00:43:54,719 --> 00:43:59,879
Speaker 2: of started, but we need someone, and that was Alex Baskin. Yeah,

902
00:44:00,080 --> 00:44:01,520
Speaker 2: and here I am. I got the job, and here

903
00:44:01,560 --> 00:44:05,680
Speaker 2: I am. It was really something that was so different

904
00:44:06,560 --> 00:44:09,000
Speaker 2: than anything I could have ever seen. I didn't know

905
00:44:09,360 --> 00:44:11,880
Speaker 2: what I was doing or what it was because it

906
00:44:11,920 --> 00:44:15,000
Speaker 2: wasn't like a five six, seven eight, yeah go over here.

907
00:44:15,040 --> 00:44:19,239
Speaker 2: Seeing this note, I was like, what are we doing? So, yeah,

908
00:44:19,360 --> 00:44:19,920
Speaker 2: what about you?

909
00:44:21,400 --> 00:44:23,279
Speaker 1: For me, it was slightly different. So I had said

910
00:44:23,320 --> 00:44:28,200
Speaker 1: I never had gone on Edition again after that incident,

911
00:44:29,680 --> 00:44:33,480
Speaker 1: but then cut to you know, we're ten or fifteen

912
00:44:33,560 --> 00:44:37,560
Speaker 1: years later. I've had the I've had my first two kids.

913
00:44:38,719 --> 00:44:42,040
Speaker 1: I was in and I've been open about this. I

914
00:44:42,040 --> 00:44:45,120
Speaker 1: was in like a rough part of my life again. Yeah,

915
00:44:45,400 --> 00:44:48,640
Speaker 1: like you know, I'd had multiple miscarriages, I had IVF.

916
00:44:48,680 --> 00:44:50,759
Speaker 1: I was struggling because it was what I forgot about

917
00:44:50,800 --> 00:44:53,479
Speaker 1: how that it was the first time that I wasn't

918
00:44:53,520 --> 00:44:54,480
Speaker 1: making my own money.

919
00:44:54,960 --> 00:44:57,440
Speaker 2: Oh wow, which is a big deal for you and

920
00:44:57,480 --> 00:44:59,080
Speaker 2: you know who else is a big deal for you?

921
00:44:59,120 --> 00:45:02,080
Speaker 2: And Kyle really bonded over that. Yeah, like both of

922
00:45:02,120 --> 00:45:05,440
Speaker 2: you like making my own money because I was always like, yeah, whatever,

923
00:45:05,600 --> 00:45:08,200
Speaker 2: let me give it to whomever. The two of you

924
00:45:08,280 --> 00:45:10,360
Speaker 2: are very in sync about that.

925
00:45:10,719 --> 00:45:13,319
Speaker 1: Yeah. I mean I always had my own separate bank

926
00:45:13,360 --> 00:45:15,799
Speaker 1: account and for the first time ever, I didn't have

927
00:45:16,120 --> 00:45:19,160
Speaker 1: anything in there, that anything, and it was just making

928
00:45:19,239 --> 00:45:23,960
Speaker 1: me honestly unhinged. And that's when I started All In,

929
00:45:24,680 --> 00:45:27,080
Speaker 1: not as a company, just I started. It was La

930
00:45:27,120 --> 00:45:30,680
Speaker 1: Workout Junkie. You guys actually made me change the name whatever,

931
00:45:31,960 --> 00:45:34,880
Speaker 1: but La Workout Junkie, which was like, I want to

932
00:45:34,960 --> 00:45:37,080
Speaker 1: change my life today. And they followed along on my

933
00:45:37,160 --> 00:45:39,560
Speaker 1: journey on changing my life and then it turned into

934
00:45:39,600 --> 00:45:42,080
Speaker 1: a business and all of that. So I'd grown a

935
00:45:42,200 --> 00:45:45,400
Speaker 1: very small Instagram falling. We're talking like ten thousand people

936
00:45:45,480 --> 00:45:49,160
Speaker 1: right throughout my journey and my business. And I had

937
00:45:50,040 --> 00:45:51,960
Speaker 1: been reached out to you know, you get those emails

938
00:45:52,000 --> 00:45:54,879
Speaker 1: from like casting sure, and I had been reached out

939
00:45:54,920 --> 00:45:59,760
Speaker 1: to be on a different show like Bunham and Murray,

940
00:46:00,520 --> 00:46:04,960
Speaker 1: like the Ogs, the Ogs of reality TV. And I

941
00:46:05,200 --> 00:46:08,839
Speaker 1: filmed the pilot and it was I mean, a lot

942
00:46:08,880 --> 00:46:10,920
Speaker 1: of the girls from that show have come on and

943
00:46:10,960 --> 00:46:13,279
Speaker 1: they and they did really well, and then the show

944
00:46:13,360 --> 00:46:17,640
Speaker 1: continued on. But after I filmed the pilot, I was like,

945
00:46:17,760 --> 00:46:20,200
Speaker 1: I absolutely cannot do that show.

946
00:46:21,200 --> 00:46:23,080
Speaker 2: Like I was like this, was it combative or just

947
00:46:23,160 --> 00:46:25,600
Speaker 2: conflict or just sit right with you?

948
00:46:26,400 --> 00:46:33,920
Speaker 1: So staged? And like I just I felt like it

949
00:46:33,960 --> 00:46:36,760
Speaker 1: didn't feel right. And so I emailed my old friend

950
00:46:36,800 --> 00:46:40,000
Speaker 1: from C A A And said, Hey, did I sign

951
00:46:40,040 --> 00:46:42,280
Speaker 1: a contract that I can't get out?

952
00:46:44,040 --> 00:46:44,400
Speaker 2: Wow?

953
00:46:45,040 --> 00:46:49,759
Speaker 1: And turned out and she said you can know. She

954
00:46:49,800 --> 00:46:51,759
Speaker 1: said you can get out of it, and she goes,

955
00:46:51,800 --> 00:46:54,719
Speaker 1: but while we're on the topic, would you do Real Housewives?

956
00:46:55,360 --> 00:46:58,919
Speaker 1: And I said, I've never watched it because I watched

957
00:46:58,960 --> 00:47:02,319
Speaker 1: The Bachelor of Real Rules like, but I wasn't at

958
00:47:02,360 --> 00:47:05,600
Speaker 1: that point. I was pretty I was younger, you know

959
00:47:05,640 --> 00:47:06,359
Speaker 1: what I was gonna say.

960
00:47:06,400 --> 00:47:07,840
Speaker 2: I always thought you were too young to be on

961
00:47:07,880 --> 00:47:10,120
Speaker 2: the show because you were on your way up. You

962
00:47:10,160 --> 00:47:16,400
Speaker 2: need bitches that are on their way down. Now you've

963
00:47:16,440 --> 00:47:18,759
Speaker 2: got all the dirt under your nails, you'll ever need

964
00:47:19,120 --> 00:47:19,680
Speaker 2: to be on.

965
00:47:20,360 --> 00:47:22,919
Speaker 1: But yeah, so that's how it happened. And then the

966
00:47:23,080 --> 00:47:26,400
Speaker 1: entire like process started where you have your interviews, your

967
00:47:26,680 --> 00:47:29,120
Speaker 1: test seetings or test shoots, all of that. But I

968
00:47:29,400 --> 00:47:32,280
Speaker 1: kind of knew the second I had my test shoot

969
00:47:32,320 --> 00:47:34,319
Speaker 1: with like Chris Colin and everybody. I was like, I'm

970
00:47:34,360 --> 00:47:36,040
Speaker 1: going to get the drop. Like, I kind of knew it.

971
00:47:36,480 --> 00:47:38,479
Speaker 1: But I mean I didn't keep it for that long.

972
00:47:38,600 --> 00:47:40,680
Speaker 2: Well, you kept it long enough. I think that you

973
00:47:40,760 --> 00:47:42,399
Speaker 2: kept it long enough to learn a lot of things

974
00:47:42,440 --> 00:47:44,799
Speaker 2: and then to you know, recreate yourself, which is.

975
00:47:46,400 --> 00:47:50,320
Speaker 1: I mean, it did make me realize that I wasn't

976
00:47:50,680 --> 00:47:52,960
Speaker 1: my full self. Yeah.

977
00:47:52,960 --> 00:47:56,080
Speaker 2: That's the one thing about turning a camera onto yourself

978
00:47:56,120 --> 00:47:59,320
Speaker 2: that I think sometimes people who aren't in our business

979
00:47:59,320 --> 00:48:02,920
Speaker 2: don't have the luxury of doing, which is to see yourself.

980
00:48:02,640 --> 00:48:05,880
Speaker 1: Yeah and go oh god, yeah.

981
00:48:05,480 --> 00:48:09,200
Speaker 2: Wow, that's really how I speak to others, or that's

982
00:48:09,200 --> 00:48:12,120
Speaker 2: how I allow others to speak to me, or I

983
00:48:12,880 --> 00:48:13,640
Speaker 2: look crazy.

984
00:48:14,000 --> 00:48:16,279
Speaker 1: No, I was like a shell of a human being.

985
00:48:16,400 --> 00:48:19,200
Speaker 1: Yeah you can, and I can assure you. I'm going

986
00:48:19,239 --> 00:48:21,640
Speaker 1: through a way fucking harder time now than I was then.

987
00:48:21,840 --> 00:48:22,960
Speaker 2: Yeah, but you got chops now.

988
00:48:23,440 --> 00:48:26,239
Speaker 1: But like it took a little time and it was like, yeah,

989
00:48:26,280 --> 00:48:30,160
Speaker 1: I mean this, this is naturally who I am. I

990
00:48:30,360 --> 00:48:32,640
Speaker 1: just I deflated in that moment.

991
00:48:33,080 --> 00:48:35,399
Speaker 2: But that's a that's a very common thing to do.

992
00:48:36,239 --> 00:48:38,360
Speaker 2: It's like when people say, oh, you're so much different,

993
00:48:38,520 --> 00:48:41,480
Speaker 2: like when we have this conversation. Of course I'm different.

994
00:48:41,560 --> 00:48:44,520
Speaker 2: I'm having a conversation with a friend. I'm not in

995
00:48:44,560 --> 00:48:47,759
Speaker 2: a shark tank right now. Yeah, I'm just open and

996
00:48:47,880 --> 00:48:50,760
Speaker 2: able to talk to you about certain things.

997
00:48:51,080 --> 00:48:56,560
Speaker 1: What would you say the biggest pro and con are of.

998
00:48:55,960 --> 00:48:58,560
Speaker 2: Being on the show, of being in reality television. I

999
00:48:58,560 --> 00:49:00,839
Speaker 2: think the biggest pro is I've it's you know, kicked

1000
00:49:00,880 --> 00:49:03,040
Speaker 2: up in a whole bunch of doors. For me, the

1001
00:49:03,040 --> 00:49:07,560
Speaker 2: biggest con has been, you know, what I went through

1002
00:49:07,640 --> 00:49:12,560
Speaker 2: publicly with Tom and subsequently everything after that, and having

1003
00:49:12,600 --> 00:49:15,960
Speaker 2: to live through that and pick yourself up and rebuild,

1004
00:49:16,400 --> 00:49:17,759
Speaker 2: which has been the hardest. What about you?

1005
00:49:18,440 --> 00:49:22,359
Speaker 1: I would say the biggest pro is has one been

1006
00:49:22,440 --> 00:49:25,040
Speaker 1: that I've been able to kind of create all of

1007
00:49:25,080 --> 00:49:29,760
Speaker 1: this afterwards. Yeah, and that I've had the support of

1008
00:49:30,400 --> 00:49:32,080
Speaker 1: all of you other ladies that have come in and

1009
00:49:32,120 --> 00:49:35,120
Speaker 1: been like, yeah, let's let's go, let's do this, let's

1010
00:49:35,120 --> 00:49:38,839
Speaker 1: make magic together. So that's been a pro along with

1011
00:49:39,200 --> 00:49:44,120
Speaker 1: you know, parts of you know, financial things, but also friendships. Yeah,

1012
00:49:44,160 --> 00:49:49,120
Speaker 1: like I have developed some real true friends, but friends

1013
00:49:49,120 --> 00:49:52,960
Speaker 1: that when you are down, they're still there. There's still there,

1014
00:49:53,000 --> 00:49:56,000
Speaker 1: like down down. So that's the pros. And I've been

1015
00:49:56,040 --> 00:49:59,160
Speaker 1: able to give my you know, my family a different

1016
00:49:59,160 --> 00:50:02,840
Speaker 1: life than I probably could have if it never happened,

1017
00:50:03,600 --> 00:50:06,400
Speaker 1: And the cons are I also gave my family a

1018
00:50:06,440 --> 00:50:07,400
Speaker 1: different life than.

1019
00:50:09,640 --> 00:50:12,480
Speaker 2: They could well set you know, you could have lived privately.

1020
00:50:13,200 --> 00:50:15,279
Speaker 2: Someone said this to me, if you weren't on a

1021
00:50:15,320 --> 00:50:17,799
Speaker 2: reality TV show, what would it have been like the

1022
00:50:17,840 --> 00:50:19,640
Speaker 2: fallout with Tom? And I said, well, look, it would

1023
00:50:19,640 --> 00:50:23,320
Speaker 2: have been a very bad legal story. Yeah, nobde cares.

1024
00:50:23,800 --> 00:50:27,200
Speaker 2: But because you're on TV, then it becomes something else,

1025
00:50:27,239 --> 00:50:29,719
Speaker 2: bigger and its own monster. And I'm sure you feel

1026
00:50:29,719 --> 00:50:30,120
Speaker 2: the same way.

1027
00:50:30,160 --> 00:50:33,040
Speaker 1: Yeah, And then you get into this feeling of your like,

1028
00:50:33,520 --> 00:50:35,960
Speaker 1: do I do I fight back super hard or do

1029
00:50:36,040 --> 00:50:37,799
Speaker 1: I just sit chilly? Or do I do that?

1030
00:50:38,040 --> 00:50:39,360
Speaker 2: Like there are no right or wrong.

1031
00:50:39,360 --> 00:50:40,759
Speaker 1: They're no right or wrong. There's no right a wrong,

1032
00:50:40,800 --> 00:50:42,880
Speaker 1: and I'm sure I'll keep making mistakes, guys, so just

1033
00:50:42,920 --> 00:50:43,520
Speaker 1: stay tune.

1034
00:50:43,719 --> 00:50:47,040
Speaker 2: Yeah, but you know what, again, there's no handbook for

1035
00:50:47,640 --> 00:50:50,959
Speaker 2: everybody can assume that they know what you're going through.

1036
00:50:51,000 --> 00:50:53,120
Speaker 2: And yes, there's been a lot of divorces and whatever

1037
00:50:53,200 --> 00:50:57,759
Speaker 2: separations or whatever I went through just but to do

1038
00:50:57,880 --> 00:51:01,200
Speaker 2: it in a public forum is a whole other animal.

1039
00:51:01,239 --> 00:51:04,440
Speaker 2: And there are very few people that you can call

1040
00:51:04,840 --> 00:51:09,080
Speaker 2: and say I feel like I'm gonna blow my head

1041
00:51:09,120 --> 00:51:12,160
Speaker 2: off and they go, yes, that's normal. Hold on a second,

1042
00:51:12,200 --> 00:51:14,160
Speaker 2: let me talk to you, and you're gonna be okay.

1043
00:51:14,360 --> 00:51:17,560
Speaker 1: And I think something that I have learned through this

1044
00:51:17,760 --> 00:51:20,839
Speaker 1: that also has been pretty great with my friends, whether

1045
00:51:20,920 --> 00:51:23,840
Speaker 1: they're show friends I met through the show or friends

1046
00:51:23,840 --> 00:51:26,440
Speaker 1: that my you know, mommy and me or whatever it was,

1047
00:51:27,120 --> 00:51:30,600
Speaker 1: is the ability to have the strength to say, actually

1048
00:51:30,880 --> 00:51:33,040
Speaker 1: I don't want to talk right now, why and that's

1049
00:51:33,080 --> 00:51:36,439
Speaker 1: really fucking sad? Or I'm really I'm having a day,

1050
00:51:36,960 --> 00:51:39,440
Speaker 1: or hey can we go, let's go to line for

1051
00:51:39,560 --> 00:51:42,720
Speaker 1: let's do that. Like we are allowed to have highs

1052
00:51:42,760 --> 00:51:44,600
Speaker 1: and lows, And I think for so long I didn't

1053
00:51:44,640 --> 00:51:46,200
Speaker 1: believe I was allowed to have those.

1054
00:51:46,400 --> 00:51:48,120
Speaker 2: Why you just thought you had to be on all

1055
00:51:48,160 --> 00:51:49,000
Speaker 2: the time, all the time.

1056
00:51:49,120 --> 00:51:51,600
Speaker 1: Jesus, I thought.

1057
00:51:51,400 --> 00:51:53,680
Speaker 2: That too, until I had nothing but lows and I

1058
00:51:54,000 --> 00:51:57,560
Speaker 2: gave up. It crushed me so hard, Like the lows

1059
00:51:57,719 --> 00:52:01,239
Speaker 2: were so hard that I was like, I can't, I

1060
00:52:01,480 --> 00:52:04,759
Speaker 2: I just can't. Like it's it's really from A to B,

1061
00:52:04,880 --> 00:52:07,839
Speaker 2: it's really from nine am to eleven am. I would

1062
00:52:07,880 --> 00:52:11,000
Speaker 2: check in with my therapist like every like her goal

1063
00:52:11,080 --> 00:52:13,040
Speaker 2: for me was every two to three hours, Like, if

1064
00:52:13,040 --> 00:52:16,000
Speaker 2: you can just make it till noon, consider that a goal.

1065
00:52:16,640 --> 00:52:18,960
Speaker 2: Like really she was like, yeah, that's how bad the

1066
00:52:19,000 --> 00:52:22,760
Speaker 2: shit is. And I feel badly for anybody that's listening

1067
00:52:22,800 --> 00:52:26,520
Speaker 2: that doesn't have that kind of support, because it is

1068
00:52:26,600 --> 00:52:30,480
Speaker 2: important as human beings and it's just women that you know,

1069
00:52:31,480 --> 00:52:35,279
Speaker 2: we go through these things and we really should be there.

1070
00:52:35,680 --> 00:52:37,600
Speaker 2: I know it's hard and it sounds cliche, but for

1071
00:52:37,640 --> 00:52:40,760
Speaker 2: one another more so than we really are, and stop

1072
00:52:40,840 --> 00:52:43,120
Speaker 2: judging everybody. You're fucked up.

1073
00:52:43,000 --> 00:52:46,120
Speaker 1: To listen and it's fine. I think it's okay. To like,

1074
00:52:46,239 --> 00:52:48,520
Speaker 1: if you want to make small talk and gossip about

1075
00:52:48,560 --> 00:52:49,520
Speaker 1: them and fucking do it.

1076
00:52:49,680 --> 00:52:52,200
Speaker 2: I think that's wonderful and that's how we put ourselves

1077
00:52:52,280 --> 00:52:54,760
Speaker 2: out here. But also too, just remember when you're pointing

1078
00:52:54,760 --> 00:52:59,239
Speaker 2: in that mirror, they're two at you, right, that's two

1079
00:52:59,239 --> 00:53:00,000
Speaker 2: fingers pointing right.

1080
00:53:00,960 --> 00:53:03,560
Speaker 1: Well, thank you guys for tuning in to another episode

1081
00:53:03,680 --> 00:53:06,719
Speaker 1: of Diamonds in the Rough. What should we get into

1082
00:53:06,800 --> 00:53:07,239
Speaker 1: next week?

1083
00:53:07,320 --> 00:53:09,080
Speaker 2: I don't know, but I think that we have we

1084
00:53:09,160 --> 00:53:12,920
Speaker 2: need to get our claws into something good. How about

1085
00:53:12,960 --> 00:53:16,960
Speaker 2: in the comments? Oh, give us some suggestions if you

1086
00:53:17,040 --> 00:53:19,920
Speaker 2: if you see something you know that you want to

1087
00:53:19,960 --> 00:53:22,880
Speaker 2: maybe talk about, give us a little suggestion, Give.

1088
00:53:22,800 --> 00:53:26,719
Speaker 1: Us a suggestion, and we could even comment on the comments.

1089
00:53:27,080 --> 00:53:27,799
Speaker 2: I like that too.

1090
00:53:28,520 --> 00:53:31,560
Speaker 1: I always should clap back to our comments.

1091
00:53:31,400 --> 00:53:34,239
Speaker 2: Or just laugh our asses off because sometimes they're just

1092
00:53:34,440 --> 00:53:36,600
Speaker 2: so good. But that means you'd have to turn off

1093
00:53:36,680 --> 00:53:37,480
Speaker 2: key where it's.

1094
00:53:37,400 --> 00:53:43,080
Speaker 1: Eh the clown emoji? The clown You can't even write

1095
00:53:43,080 --> 00:53:45,520
Speaker 1: that online? Try it dar, all right?

1096
00:53:45,640 --> 00:53:46,880
Speaker 2: Thank you so much for listening,