1 00:00:02,680 --> 00:00:15,480 Speaker 1: This is Teddy Teapot. Hi, guys, welcome back. I um 2 00:00:15,800 --> 00:00:19,920 Speaker 1: did a little Instagram poll where I asked everybody what 3 00:00:20,000 --> 00:00:23,800 Speaker 1: they want to hear the most, okay from me, and 4 00:00:23,960 --> 00:00:29,800 Speaker 1: the number one topic was they wanted to hear about IBS, infertility, miscarriages, 5 00:00:29,880 --> 00:00:31,560 Speaker 1: all that kind of stuff. Because I have shared a 6 00:00:31,600 --> 00:00:35,080 Speaker 1: little bit about my story, you know, through Instagram and 7 00:00:35,360 --> 00:00:37,559 Speaker 1: through the show that I'm on, and so that's a 8 00:00:37,640 --> 00:00:40,479 Speaker 1: topic that everybody really wanted me to dig into. I 9 00:00:40,520 --> 00:00:43,280 Speaker 1: can't wait to hear your story. Well, I'm gonna try 10 00:00:43,400 --> 00:00:45,919 Speaker 1: not to get super emotional about it, but I figured 11 00:00:46,520 --> 00:00:49,159 Speaker 1: if we start with my story, then we can go 12 00:00:49,200 --> 00:00:51,760 Speaker 1: into all the different avenues and kind of dig into 13 00:00:52,159 --> 00:00:54,440 Speaker 1: the listeners questions. And then also we're gonna have some 14 00:00:54,480 --> 00:00:58,400 Speaker 1: specialists on and then some other women that have gone 15 00:00:58,400 --> 00:01:01,840 Speaker 1: through different things than I have and you know, really 16 00:01:02,000 --> 00:01:09,040 Speaker 1: learn about everything. UM. So, just backstory in regards to me, 17 00:01:10,360 --> 00:01:12,399 Speaker 1: I had been on the pill since I was about 18 00:01:12,440 --> 00:01:15,959 Speaker 1: a teenager, you know, like on the pill, and then 19 00:01:16,160 --> 00:01:19,000 Speaker 1: when my husband and I got engaged, I went off 20 00:01:19,000 --> 00:01:21,840 Speaker 1: the pill. Not because I was trying immediately to get pregnant, 21 00:01:21,840 --> 00:01:23,080 Speaker 1: but we were like all right by the time I 22 00:01:23,120 --> 00:01:25,720 Speaker 1: get married, Um, I'm gonna want to start trying, and 23 00:01:25,760 --> 00:01:28,679 Speaker 1: we had we had talked about that, so we but 24 00:01:28,760 --> 00:01:32,440 Speaker 1: we also weren't not trying, right. But I never even 25 00:01:32,560 --> 00:01:34,760 Speaker 1: was really taught that there was like a time that 26 00:01:34,800 --> 00:01:37,440 Speaker 1: you ovulated and that's when you got pregnant. Like I 27 00:01:37,480 --> 00:01:40,120 Speaker 1: was completely glueless. I was like, you know, because when 28 00:01:40,160 --> 00:01:42,000 Speaker 1: you're younger, you're just taught don't have sex because you 29 00:01:42,000 --> 00:01:45,400 Speaker 1: get pregnant, right, So I didn't realize there were certain days. 30 00:01:45,440 --> 00:01:47,480 Speaker 1: So I mean, we weren't following any kind of method. 31 00:01:47,520 --> 00:01:50,800 Speaker 1: We were just not not trying. And then after we 32 00:01:50,840 --> 00:01:53,880 Speaker 1: got married, we were trying and trying and trying, and 33 00:01:53,920 --> 00:01:56,800 Speaker 1: we learned when we when we needed to try three 34 00:01:56,840 --> 00:01:58,600 Speaker 1: day window, you know. We we tried to take all 35 00:01:58,600 --> 00:02:00,280 Speaker 1: the sex appeal out of it. You know, I'm like 36 00:02:00,400 --> 00:02:03,280 Speaker 1: checking my temperature, doing all the things, and I'm not 37 00:02:03,280 --> 00:02:06,840 Speaker 1: getting pregnant. And at first it's like it's fun and 38 00:02:06,880 --> 00:02:08,959 Speaker 1: we're laughing about it and blah blah blah. And then 39 00:02:09,320 --> 00:02:11,680 Speaker 1: after a while, I just started putting all this pressure 40 00:02:11,680 --> 00:02:13,840 Speaker 1: on myself. I'm like, I'm still not getting pregnant, and 41 00:02:13,880 --> 00:02:18,560 Speaker 1: the process started becoming like a job, like we're checking 42 00:02:18,560 --> 00:02:20,280 Speaker 1: the thing that I'm checking this, and I'm checking that. 43 00:02:20,360 --> 00:02:22,440 Speaker 1: I'm checking to make sure I'm ovulating. Now I'm saying 44 00:02:22,480 --> 00:02:24,959 Speaker 1: if I'm getting you know, I skipped a period, blah 45 00:02:24,960 --> 00:02:28,080 Speaker 1: blah blah, nothing's really happening. So I end up going 46 00:02:28,120 --> 00:02:30,519 Speaker 1: to the doctor and I'm like, listen, you know, here 47 00:02:30,520 --> 00:02:33,040 Speaker 1: we are. We're over six months into this, but really 48 00:02:33,040 --> 00:02:35,240 Speaker 1: it's been over a year and a half into this 49 00:02:35,280 --> 00:02:38,920 Speaker 1: because I haven't not been trying. And he's like, all right, 50 00:02:38,919 --> 00:02:42,520 Speaker 1: well we'll start you on something called clomad. And I 51 00:02:42,639 --> 00:02:46,160 Speaker 1: call this the crazy pills. Oh my god, Like I 52 00:02:46,240 --> 00:02:50,160 Speaker 1: can't even tell you how crazy clomad made me. Apparently 53 00:02:50,160 --> 00:02:52,200 Speaker 1: what it does is, and I'm not a doctor, but 54 00:02:52,240 --> 00:02:55,400 Speaker 1: it gives you more eggs or something like that helps 55 00:02:55,440 --> 00:02:58,560 Speaker 1: you release so it's all estrogen, as I think. So 56 00:02:58,720 --> 00:03:00,560 Speaker 1: I don't even really know. We're gonna have to task 57 00:03:00,600 --> 00:03:05,120 Speaker 1: a professional what exactly cloona it is. But I became 58 00:03:05,320 --> 00:03:07,840 Speaker 1: one of those people. Like I was driving home from work. 59 00:03:08,200 --> 00:03:14,080 Speaker 1: I passed Taco Bell, Okay, fine, I had to do 60 00:03:14,120 --> 00:03:16,960 Speaker 1: a U turn and I couldn't, and so I called 61 00:03:17,040 --> 00:03:25,480 Speaker 1: my husband hysterically crying, just so I passed it and 62 00:03:25,520 --> 00:03:29,160 Speaker 1: then I couldn't do the U turn and he's like, babe, 63 00:03:30,360 --> 00:03:34,200 Speaker 1: everything's good, like you're alive, Like I had no. I 64 00:03:34,240 --> 00:03:37,640 Speaker 1: was having these outbursts all of the time. And so 65 00:03:37,720 --> 00:03:40,400 Speaker 1: that was me on clomad for six months. Welcome to 66 00:03:40,480 --> 00:03:46,320 Speaker 1: new married life, and you know, I was a disaster. Um. 67 00:03:46,520 --> 00:03:50,400 Speaker 1: So that didn't work and um. Then I went back 68 00:03:50,440 --> 00:03:53,080 Speaker 1: to the doctor. I'm like, listen, like, you're gonna have 69 00:03:53,120 --> 00:03:55,000 Speaker 1: to put me in a straight jacket soon because I'm 70 00:03:55,040 --> 00:03:57,960 Speaker 1: not good on this medication. And he's like, I think 71 00:03:57,960 --> 00:03:59,840 Speaker 1: you need to go to our fertility specialists. He's like, 72 00:04:00,000 --> 00:04:03,800 Speaker 1: there's nothing showing up that is wrong with you, but 73 00:04:03,920 --> 00:04:06,880 Speaker 1: you're just not getting pregnant. So then I went to 74 00:04:06,880 --> 00:04:11,320 Speaker 1: the fertility doctor and with my daughter Slate. He was like, 75 00:04:11,360 --> 00:04:13,480 Speaker 1: all right, let's just try to We're gonna keep you 76 00:04:13,520 --> 00:04:15,360 Speaker 1: on the clod and then we're gonna do a round 77 00:04:15,360 --> 00:04:19,480 Speaker 1: of insimination. That works for most people. Um yeah, I 78 00:04:19,520 --> 00:04:20,960 Speaker 1: don't know if he said that works for most people, 79 00:04:20,960 --> 00:04:25,280 Speaker 1: but he said, let's try an insimination first, which they 80 00:04:25,279 --> 00:04:28,120 Speaker 1: don't really give you all the information. When you're in there, 81 00:04:28,120 --> 00:04:30,880 Speaker 1: you're like, okay, great, shouldn't be anything. So we schedule 82 00:04:30,920 --> 00:04:35,159 Speaker 1: our date and when he goes into you know, Edwin 83 00:04:35,240 --> 00:04:38,360 Speaker 1: has to like take care of his business. It takes forever. 84 00:04:38,440 --> 00:04:40,160 Speaker 1: And I'm like, listen, buddy, I know how long this 85 00:04:40,279 --> 00:04:43,200 Speaker 1: normally takes. Like let's get with the program. Here, like 86 00:04:43,279 --> 00:04:45,719 Speaker 1: waiting for him, I'm ready to get insiminated. And he 87 00:04:45,800 --> 00:04:47,600 Speaker 1: comes out and he's like his face is like white 88 00:04:47,600 --> 00:04:51,279 Speaker 1: and he's like that's brutal in there. I'm like, what's 89 00:04:51,320 --> 00:04:54,159 Speaker 1: the problem. And he's like, they have an updated the 90 00:04:54,160 --> 00:04:58,800 Speaker 1: Born since the eighties and I'm like what And he 91 00:04:59,120 --> 00:05:01,880 Speaker 1: is a half breaking mess like he is like I 92 00:05:01,920 --> 00:05:04,600 Speaker 1: don't know that I can do that again. And I'm like, well, 93 00:05:05,200 --> 00:05:07,599 Speaker 1: he's like, I mean that was brutal. He's like you're 94 00:05:07,640 --> 00:05:11,200 Speaker 1: on this like crazy. There's like a couch option. It's 95 00:05:11,279 --> 00:05:14,960 Speaker 1: not a good scene. But anyway, with Slate, I actually 96 00:05:15,000 --> 00:05:18,719 Speaker 1: got pregnant the first time being inseminated, which was amazing, 97 00:05:18,880 --> 00:05:23,039 Speaker 1: Like we were like, yeah, everything's great. Um. Then I 98 00:05:23,080 --> 00:05:27,280 Speaker 1: had a very difficult pregnancy, I think because so many 99 00:05:27,360 --> 00:05:29,680 Speaker 1: years of being like riding horses and doing all of that. 100 00:05:30,120 --> 00:05:33,800 Speaker 1: Then I had to stop riding and I kept spotting 101 00:05:33,839 --> 00:05:37,159 Speaker 1: throughout my pregnancy. So they repeatedly were putting me on 102 00:05:37,240 --> 00:05:40,920 Speaker 1: bed rest, so my entire pregnancy would be Okay, you 103 00:05:40,960 --> 00:05:42,680 Speaker 1: can go back to work. I couldn't ride, but I 104 00:05:42,680 --> 00:05:44,599 Speaker 1: could still teach, and then I would go back on 105 00:05:44,680 --> 00:05:47,599 Speaker 1: bed rest. So like I was already developing almost like 106 00:05:47,600 --> 00:05:51,080 Speaker 1: a level of depression because my life was changing in 107 00:05:51,120 --> 00:05:54,440 Speaker 1: a in a way that I didn't understand. Plus, for 108 00:05:54,480 --> 00:05:57,360 Speaker 1: your first child, you really don't have any idea what's 109 00:05:57,360 --> 00:06:01,520 Speaker 1: about to happen. Um. So I I had Slate. She 110 00:06:01,560 --> 00:06:04,400 Speaker 1: was a healthy, beautiful baby girl, you know, thank you God, 111 00:06:04,440 --> 00:06:09,240 Speaker 1: amazing um. And then after I had Slate, I got postpartum, 112 00:06:09,320 --> 00:06:13,800 Speaker 1: and I remember being so embarrassed and ashamed. And I 113 00:06:13,880 --> 00:06:17,600 Speaker 1: didn't know that that happened to people. And like there 114 00:06:17,600 --> 00:06:21,320 Speaker 1: were moments where like I would search on the internet 115 00:06:21,320 --> 00:06:24,240 Speaker 1: like postpartum depression, and I didn't have. I had heard 116 00:06:24,279 --> 00:06:28,000 Speaker 1: about people getting postpartum and it was like they wanted 117 00:06:28,040 --> 00:06:31,240 Speaker 1: to hurt their baby. I didn't have that. I just 118 00:06:31,640 --> 00:06:36,400 Speaker 1: felt so down Edwin would leave for work and I 119 00:06:36,440 --> 00:06:38,840 Speaker 1: would sob you know, but I didn't want to tell 120 00:06:38,920 --> 00:06:41,320 Speaker 1: him that because you don't want to tell your husband. 121 00:06:42,000 --> 00:06:44,360 Speaker 1: I don't know I'm gonna make it through this day, 122 00:06:44,480 --> 00:06:49,080 Speaker 1: you know, and luckily, like with time, it kind of 123 00:06:49,160 --> 00:06:53,240 Speaker 1: it lifted. And you know, I was so happy that 124 00:06:53,240 --> 00:06:57,120 Speaker 1: that happened. But then we started trying again to have 125 00:06:57,200 --> 00:07:03,440 Speaker 1: another baby, and I just it wasn't happening, went through 126 00:07:03,440 --> 00:07:06,159 Speaker 1: all the steps again and we ended up needing to 127 00:07:06,200 --> 00:07:12,520 Speaker 1: do IVF. And here's where, like, it just was unbelievably 128 00:07:12,600 --> 00:07:16,280 Speaker 1: hard for me, because I don't know if everybody's like this, 129 00:07:16,440 --> 00:07:19,320 Speaker 1: I mean most people, those people probably aren't, but like 130 00:07:19,800 --> 00:07:22,440 Speaker 1: I don't like to see. I don't like when people 131 00:07:22,480 --> 00:07:25,920 Speaker 1: can see me breaking down, right, So I hit it 132 00:07:26,000 --> 00:07:29,400 Speaker 1: from everybody how hard it was every single time. So 133 00:07:30,680 --> 00:07:33,960 Speaker 1: I would go in, I would have to harvest my eggs, 134 00:07:34,120 --> 00:07:36,280 Speaker 1: then they would mix it with Edwin's and then we 135 00:07:36,280 --> 00:07:39,480 Speaker 1: would do um pgs, which is the testing to make 136 00:07:39,520 --> 00:07:43,040 Speaker 1: sure that you have healthy babies. And then you know, 137 00:07:43,120 --> 00:07:46,040 Speaker 1: each time I would probably have one or two. Then 138 00:07:46,120 --> 00:07:49,200 Speaker 1: they would put, you know, implant. I don't know if 139 00:07:49,200 --> 00:07:51,880 Speaker 1: the words implant they would yeah, they would implant the baby. 140 00:07:52,480 --> 00:07:56,880 Speaker 1: And then multiple times, like it was just repeated, you know, 141 00:07:56,960 --> 00:08:00,160 Speaker 1: like this one didn't take it. All your numbers are, Oh, 142 00:08:00,280 --> 00:08:03,800 Speaker 1: we don't know what's going to happen here. Um you 143 00:08:03,960 --> 00:08:06,200 Speaker 1: now you have a killer cell, which I had never 144 00:08:06,240 --> 00:08:08,920 Speaker 1: heard of before. So then they started me on blood 145 00:08:08,920 --> 00:08:13,640 Speaker 1: thinners and steroids and it just was like just NonStop, 146 00:08:14,440 --> 00:08:18,240 Speaker 1: and you know, you just get really stuck inside of 147 00:08:18,280 --> 00:08:21,240 Speaker 1: yourself and and I know I'm gonna get heat for this, 148 00:08:21,280 --> 00:08:23,160 Speaker 1: but I all I could keep thinking was what is 149 00:08:23,200 --> 00:08:25,480 Speaker 1: wrong with me? Like what am I doing? Why is 150 00:08:25,520 --> 00:08:29,280 Speaker 1: my body killing these babies? Like what is happening? And 151 00:08:29,320 --> 00:08:34,480 Speaker 1: then like the final straw was the I was. I 152 00:08:34,559 --> 00:08:38,280 Speaker 1: went in. We did another round and at this point, 153 00:08:38,320 --> 00:08:40,120 Speaker 1: like everyone in my life was like this, this is 154 00:08:40,160 --> 00:08:43,080 Speaker 1: getting a little it's getting a little brutal here. And 155 00:08:45,080 --> 00:08:48,720 Speaker 1: I went in and I got pregnant, and it was like, yeah, 156 00:08:48,960 --> 00:08:52,440 Speaker 1: this is great. And they didn't say, like, your numbers 157 00:08:52,440 --> 00:08:55,240 Speaker 1: are still really low, You're still like in a danger zone. 158 00:08:55,320 --> 00:08:57,080 Speaker 1: We know, we knew it was a boy because of 159 00:08:57,120 --> 00:09:00,520 Speaker 1: the testing, and UM we named him UM like we 160 00:09:00,520 --> 00:09:03,880 Speaker 1: were ready. And then I had a miscarriage and I 161 00:09:03,920 --> 00:09:07,200 Speaker 1: remember being like what am I going to do and 162 00:09:07,240 --> 00:09:10,480 Speaker 1: almost wanting to hide it from everybody in my life 163 00:09:10,480 --> 00:09:12,560 Speaker 1: because I was like, they're not going to let me 164 00:09:12,640 --> 00:09:16,400 Speaker 1: do this again. And like I remember, I was like, 165 00:09:17,200 --> 00:09:19,280 Speaker 1: you know, I just really thought it was gonna work, 166 00:09:19,440 --> 00:09:23,520 Speaker 1: and I was so excited, and I just remember feeling 167 00:09:23,559 --> 00:09:26,760 Speaker 1: so broken, and I remember a call. I had a 168 00:09:26,800 --> 00:09:30,559 Speaker 1: conversation with my dad and Edwyn at the same time, 169 00:09:30,600 --> 00:09:33,199 Speaker 1: and they were like, you're not doing it again. You're 170 00:09:33,200 --> 00:09:35,640 Speaker 1: actually going to take a break, And I said, if 171 00:09:35,720 --> 00:09:37,600 Speaker 1: I can talk to the doctor and he will let 172 00:09:37,640 --> 00:09:39,440 Speaker 1: me do it one more time, you guys, please just 173 00:09:39,520 --> 00:09:41,559 Speaker 1: let me do it one more time, because I just 174 00:09:42,080 --> 00:09:47,920 Speaker 1: I'm not I just can't imagine not trying again. I 175 00:09:48,200 --> 00:09:50,160 Speaker 1: promise I can do it. I can do it. And 176 00:09:50,200 --> 00:09:53,560 Speaker 1: it became this like almost obsession that I don't know 177 00:09:53,800 --> 00:09:57,400 Speaker 1: why it like became this way. So then I became 178 00:09:57,440 --> 00:09:59,600 Speaker 1: a totally different person, Like I was like, I am 179 00:09:59,600 --> 00:10:01,719 Speaker 1: not sure one person that this is hard. I am 180 00:10:01,840 --> 00:10:04,960 Speaker 1: done being upset about it because I can't let them 181 00:10:05,040 --> 00:10:08,880 Speaker 1: know and pull it away. So I called my doctor 182 00:10:09,520 --> 00:10:11,960 Speaker 1: with my husband on, and he was like, you know, 183 00:10:12,200 --> 00:10:14,360 Speaker 1: Dr Mars. So for those of you asking who my 184 00:10:14,400 --> 00:10:17,160 Speaker 1: doctor was, it was Dr Mars. I said, will you 185 00:10:17,200 --> 00:10:19,600 Speaker 1: please let me do one more round? And he's like, Teddy, 186 00:10:19,640 --> 00:10:22,200 Speaker 1: I don't think you're emotionally in the place to do it. 187 00:10:22,280 --> 00:10:24,840 Speaker 1: And I said, please, I'm begging you one more round 188 00:10:24,840 --> 00:10:27,480 Speaker 1: and then I promise, I'll take a year off, just 189 00:10:27,640 --> 00:10:32,640 Speaker 1: let me do it, and he was like, I, okay, 190 00:10:33,000 --> 00:10:36,160 Speaker 1: you can do one more round. And we went in 191 00:10:36,520 --> 00:10:40,079 Speaker 1: and you know, everybody's mind frame was just different this time, 192 00:10:40,120 --> 00:10:43,080 Speaker 1: and we went in kind of sad, like we no 193 00:10:43,160 --> 00:10:46,560 Speaker 1: longer had that like life in us, like where you 194 00:10:46,600 --> 00:10:52,040 Speaker 1: know this is going to happen, and uh, I it 195 00:10:52,120 --> 00:10:55,600 Speaker 1: was before Christmas, so I would have found out on 196 00:10:55,679 --> 00:11:01,120 Speaker 1: Christmas Day. And I didn't even tell anybody those details. 197 00:11:01,160 --> 00:11:04,719 Speaker 1: I just went home for Christmas, I had the implantation. 198 00:11:04,800 --> 00:11:07,720 Speaker 1: I went home for Christmas. I lived Christmas like I 199 00:11:07,800 --> 00:11:12,680 Speaker 1: wasn't pregnant, like life was nothing. And I came back 200 00:11:13,080 --> 00:11:18,760 Speaker 1: and I was pregnant like I was pregnant, and everything 201 00:11:18,960 --> 00:11:22,000 Speaker 1: felt really, you know great, But then they're like, but 202 00:11:22,080 --> 00:11:25,080 Speaker 1: your numbers are still low. So for the first you know, 203 00:11:25,120 --> 00:11:28,000 Speaker 1: it was I think ten weeks, you're just kind of waiting, 204 00:11:28,040 --> 00:11:32,400 Speaker 1: and then it just was that waiting game. But luckily 205 00:11:33,200 --> 00:11:37,720 Speaker 1: Crews stuck and you know, he was my amazing baby boy. 206 00:11:37,840 --> 00:11:39,880 Speaker 1: But then what ended up happening next to us, which 207 00:11:39,920 --> 00:11:41,760 Speaker 1: I don't know that a lot of people talk about, 208 00:11:41,760 --> 00:11:45,080 Speaker 1: which is actually the hardest part that we went through 209 00:11:45,120 --> 00:11:48,760 Speaker 1: in regards to this whole process is when Cruz was born. 210 00:11:48,920 --> 00:11:51,000 Speaker 1: So you know, we already had all of like these 211 00:11:51,080 --> 00:11:55,080 Speaker 1: mixed feelings because we had to do IVF. We chose 212 00:11:55,120 --> 00:11:57,400 Speaker 1: a boy. We knew, you know, all of these things 213 00:11:57,480 --> 00:12:00,200 Speaker 1: that go through your mind that they shouldn't you. We 214 00:12:00,240 --> 00:12:05,680 Speaker 1: just wanted a healthy baby. But like you start blaming yourself. Um, 215 00:12:05,840 --> 00:12:09,400 Speaker 1: we when I was going into labor, was really long labor, 216 00:12:09,640 --> 00:12:13,719 Speaker 1: and when crews finally came out, the nurse put him 217 00:12:13,720 --> 00:12:18,880 Speaker 1: on my chest and I said, um, something something's wrong 218 00:12:18,920 --> 00:12:22,240 Speaker 1: with him. I'm sorry, something's wrong with him. So they 219 00:12:22,320 --> 00:12:25,000 Speaker 1: immediately because they saw on my record that I had 220 00:12:25,040 --> 00:12:28,200 Speaker 1: postpartum was slate, they saw something was wrong with me, 221 00:12:28,960 --> 00:12:32,559 Speaker 1: and they weren't really believing that something was wrong with him. 222 00:12:32,600 --> 00:12:35,400 Speaker 1: And finally a nurse like, they're like, he's fine, teddy. 223 00:12:35,720 --> 00:12:38,960 Speaker 1: Some kids just take a little bit longer to cry. 224 00:12:39,120 --> 00:12:41,840 Speaker 1: You shouldn't have to worry about it, and it's gonna 225 00:12:41,880 --> 00:12:45,360 Speaker 1: be okay. And I started screaming like it's not okay. 226 00:12:45,400 --> 00:12:49,080 Speaker 1: He's not okay. And finally the nurse was like, you 227 00:12:49,120 --> 00:12:51,200 Speaker 1: know what, he's not okay, like, and they called the 228 00:12:51,240 --> 00:12:54,400 Speaker 1: code and the hunter. You know, Cedars is a learning hospital, 229 00:12:54,400 --> 00:12:57,280 Speaker 1: so it's hundreds of doctors coming in and you know, 230 00:12:57,320 --> 00:13:00,880 Speaker 1: like learning, you know whatever, they take him away from 231 00:13:00,920 --> 00:13:04,000 Speaker 1: from us. He's on life support. We don't know anything. 232 00:13:04,880 --> 00:13:09,200 Speaker 1: They medicate me, so I like knock out. I wake 233 00:13:09,320 --> 00:13:12,720 Speaker 1: up and my husband is just sitting in the corner 234 00:13:12,760 --> 00:13:16,080 Speaker 1: and like a pile of mush, like just like crying. 235 00:13:16,200 --> 00:13:18,840 Speaker 1: He's like, I don't know if Cruises alive. I haven't 236 00:13:18,880 --> 00:13:22,040 Speaker 1: heard from anyone. No one's told me anything. I'm just 237 00:13:22,080 --> 00:13:26,080 Speaker 1: sitting here. And he's like, now I'm blaming myself because 238 00:13:26,080 --> 00:13:28,600 Speaker 1: we did this and we created this bit. You know, 239 00:13:28,679 --> 00:13:31,000 Speaker 1: like all of these things that are going through your mind, 240 00:13:31,000 --> 00:13:34,040 Speaker 1: they are completely out of your control. And I called 241 00:13:34,120 --> 00:13:36,080 Speaker 1: up to the to the nick you and I said, Hi, 242 00:13:36,160 --> 00:13:38,760 Speaker 1: I'm Cruises Mom, and it's so great. You guys want 243 00:13:38,760 --> 00:13:41,720 Speaker 1: to come up. Oh my god, you guys want to 244 00:13:41,720 --> 00:13:45,320 Speaker 1: come up. He's still on. He's still on, you know, 245 00:13:45,520 --> 00:13:47,839 Speaker 1: the breathing machine and everything like that, but you guys 246 00:13:47,880 --> 00:13:52,640 Speaker 1: can't hold him, but you can see him. And um, 247 00:13:52,760 --> 00:13:55,840 Speaker 1: you know, once we saw him, all of those those 248 00:13:55,880 --> 00:13:59,080 Speaker 1: feelings went away. But that time where you're just really 249 00:13:59,120 --> 00:14:04,280 Speaker 1: trying to figure out if your baby's okay, you go 250 00:14:04,400 --> 00:14:06,600 Speaker 1: to every negative place in the world. And you know, 251 00:14:06,640 --> 00:14:09,880 Speaker 1: we ended up finding out that they don't exactly know 252 00:14:09,920 --> 00:14:11,800 Speaker 1: why he wasn't breathing when he was born, but he 253 00:14:11,840 --> 00:14:14,360 Speaker 1: does have a heart condition, but something that can be managed, 254 00:14:14,720 --> 00:14:19,480 Speaker 1: so in the end, it's all very positive. But it 255 00:14:19,520 --> 00:14:22,800 Speaker 1: became a reason why, I mean, why we never thought 256 00:14:22,840 --> 00:14:26,080 Speaker 1: we'd have another baby again. And that's why I mean, 257 00:14:26,320 --> 00:14:28,080 Speaker 1: for those of you who do or don't know, I 258 00:14:28,160 --> 00:14:33,240 Speaker 1: am nineteen weeks pregnant right now and it happened naturally, 259 00:14:33,400 --> 00:14:37,040 Speaker 1: and I had no idea, and I didn't even know 260 00:14:37,120 --> 00:14:40,600 Speaker 1: I was pregnant till I was nine weeks pregnant. Um, 261 00:14:40,720 --> 00:14:44,680 Speaker 1: we weren't trying, you know, It's just how life works. 262 00:14:44,760 --> 00:14:47,560 Speaker 1: So I know all of the ups and downs. I 263 00:14:47,600 --> 00:14:49,680 Speaker 1: know so many of you guys that have struggled with 264 00:14:49,680 --> 00:14:52,280 Speaker 1: the same things I have. Once I started opening up 265 00:14:52,280 --> 00:14:54,480 Speaker 1: and telling people I had a miscarriage, or this happened, 266 00:14:54,520 --> 00:14:56,680 Speaker 1: or this happened, or I had the killer cell or 267 00:14:56,720 --> 00:14:59,040 Speaker 1: the me too, me too, me too, you know, and 268 00:14:59,560 --> 00:15:03,160 Speaker 1: we don't talk about things until somebody else is going 269 00:15:03,200 --> 00:15:05,680 Speaker 1: through them. And I think it's so important to know 270 00:15:05,960 --> 00:15:13,400 Speaker 1: you're not alone. But um, I don't even know how 271 00:15:13,440 --> 00:15:16,840 Speaker 1: to transition from. And I hope it's okay that I'm 272 00:15:16,840 --> 00:15:22,360 Speaker 1: asking emotionally, how do you feel being pregnant? Are you nervous? Well, 273 00:15:22,400 --> 00:15:26,040 Speaker 1: that's what everybody has been asking me, because I was 274 00:15:26,240 --> 00:15:28,800 Speaker 1: so nervous the last couple of times. Also, I was 275 00:15:28,840 --> 00:15:31,520 Speaker 1: in a completely different stage in my life because even 276 00:15:31,560 --> 00:15:34,040 Speaker 1: with CRUs I was on bed rest multiple times as well. 277 00:15:34,520 --> 00:15:39,560 Speaker 1: And going into this pregnancy, I'm able to be active because, 278 00:15:39,600 --> 00:15:41,360 Speaker 1: like one, I didn't know for eight weeks, so I 279 00:15:41,400 --> 00:15:43,800 Speaker 1: was active all before. You know, they say what the 280 00:15:43,840 --> 00:15:46,400 Speaker 1: doctor says, as long as you start your pregnancy active, 281 00:15:46,640 --> 00:15:50,640 Speaker 1: you can continue whatever you were doing prior. So I 282 00:15:50,680 --> 00:15:54,640 Speaker 1: am able to eat properly, like to nourish the baby. 283 00:15:54,840 --> 00:15:57,520 Speaker 1: I'm in a place where I'm taking care of myself. 284 00:15:57,560 --> 00:15:59,520 Speaker 1: I'm able to move every day. I'm still able to 285 00:15:59,520 --> 00:16:02,000 Speaker 1: work my jobs, change, you know, all of those things. 286 00:16:02,760 --> 00:16:06,840 Speaker 1: And to be honest, I'm the least stressed about this 287 00:16:06,880 --> 00:16:09,280 Speaker 1: baby than I have I was with the others. And 288 00:16:09,320 --> 00:16:12,680 Speaker 1: I think it's solely because I'm like, I've done the 289 00:16:12,800 --> 00:16:15,560 Speaker 1: I've done it the other way right, and I just 290 00:16:15,720 --> 00:16:18,640 Speaker 1: can't do it that way again. And you don't have 291 00:16:18,720 --> 00:16:23,760 Speaker 1: all of those prescriptions in your body, which so this 292 00:16:23,840 --> 00:16:26,760 Speaker 1: probably feels really different. Yeah, Everyone's like, how do you 293 00:16:26,800 --> 00:16:28,200 Speaker 1: not know you were pregnant? I'm like, well, when I 294 00:16:28,240 --> 00:16:29,760 Speaker 1: was pregnant on the others, I was either on the 295 00:16:29,760 --> 00:16:32,240 Speaker 1: clomad or the steroids or the blood thunders are, Like, 296 00:16:32,400 --> 00:16:36,720 Speaker 1: I was on so much medication that I wasn't feeling 297 00:16:36,840 --> 00:16:40,440 Speaker 1: the regular pregnancy symptoms. So even in those first you know, 298 00:16:40,520 --> 00:16:42,720 Speaker 1: eight or nine weeks when I didn't know it was pregnant, 299 00:16:42,760 --> 00:16:45,560 Speaker 1: I was like, I'm tired. But who isn't tired When 300 00:16:45,560 --> 00:16:48,000 Speaker 1: you have kids and you work and you're filming a 301 00:16:48,040 --> 00:16:51,120 Speaker 1: TV you know, whatever it is, you're tired. Yeah. So 302 00:16:51,440 --> 00:16:56,760 Speaker 1: I mean I really feel like, I'm like, we're gonna 303 00:16:56,760 --> 00:17:00,080 Speaker 1: be okay. Um, But it's definitely a different feeling that 304 00:17:00,120 --> 00:17:05,560 Speaker 1: I've ever had being pregnant. So yeah, I'm just like, 305 00:17:06,240 --> 00:17:08,280 Speaker 1: you know, but we were. I mean, I took nine 306 00:17:08,320 --> 00:17:11,119 Speaker 1: home pregnancy tests before I went to the doctor with 307 00:17:11,200 --> 00:17:14,639 Speaker 1: the phone. Wait, I just want did you postmate the 308 00:17:14,640 --> 00:17:16,959 Speaker 1: practice pregnancy test to the house. Where did you go 309 00:17:17,040 --> 00:17:20,080 Speaker 1: to go? To know? Like I like walk of ship, 310 00:17:20,240 --> 00:17:22,880 Speaker 1: like what I went twice to go and then the 311 00:17:22,880 --> 00:17:25,200 Speaker 1: third time, I asked my sistem like, can you figure 312 00:17:25,200 --> 00:17:27,639 Speaker 1: me up from pregnancy tests? I just don't know that 313 00:17:27,680 --> 00:17:30,399 Speaker 1: I can handle the CBS lady again my ship is 314 00:17:30,840 --> 00:17:36,359 Speaker 1: I'm really judging, but I still have them all just 315 00:17:36,600 --> 00:17:39,280 Speaker 1: in case I love it. Oh my gosh. So yeah, 316 00:17:39,400 --> 00:17:43,240 Speaker 1: that's kind of my my story, and I I feel 317 00:17:43,280 --> 00:17:46,320 Speaker 1: like when I whenever I talk about it, yes, there's 318 00:17:46,359 --> 00:17:49,159 Speaker 1: people that are gonna I'm not going to say everything right, 319 00:17:49,160 --> 00:17:51,120 Speaker 1: I'm going to say something that may end up offending 320 00:17:51,160 --> 00:17:53,359 Speaker 1: somebody or that. But I have to be able to 321 00:17:53,359 --> 00:17:56,520 Speaker 1: share my story and how I felt because there are 322 00:17:56,600 --> 00:17:59,280 Speaker 1: people that are going through the same exact thing that 323 00:17:59,359 --> 00:18:02,240 Speaker 1: feel really alone that I don't feel like they can 324 00:18:02,280 --> 00:18:05,600 Speaker 1: open up because for whatever reason, we put this pressure 325 00:18:05,600 --> 00:18:08,520 Speaker 1: on ourselves. Forever reason we don't. It's weird. You feel 326 00:18:08,520 --> 00:18:11,159 Speaker 1: like if you are weak or you break down, and 327 00:18:11,200 --> 00:18:14,080 Speaker 1: it's not even weak, it's just having emotions that they're 328 00:18:14,080 --> 00:18:17,879 Speaker 1: going to tell you have to stop right, and it's 329 00:18:17,920 --> 00:18:20,680 Speaker 1: I mean, that's brutal. When someone says, you know you're 330 00:18:20,680 --> 00:18:25,360 Speaker 1: done just enough, you need time, your time to heal, 331 00:18:25,720 --> 00:18:28,960 Speaker 1: and can you still It's like you took us right 332 00:18:29,000 --> 00:18:30,600 Speaker 1: back there. And I think you went back there. I 333 00:18:30,640 --> 00:18:35,080 Speaker 1: could feel the panic when you were like, please, Dad, please, Edwin, 334 00:18:35,280 --> 00:18:39,000 Speaker 1: let me do it one more time. Yeah, like and 335 00:18:39,040 --> 00:18:42,080 Speaker 1: that all these other people had sort of they want 336 00:18:42,080 --> 00:18:43,879 Speaker 1: to have your best interest, but it's almost like a 337 00:18:43,920 --> 00:18:46,840 Speaker 1: power over you. And that would be so because they're like, 338 00:18:46,880 --> 00:18:49,480 Speaker 1: we want you to we want you to feel better, 339 00:18:49,680 --> 00:18:52,520 Speaker 1: we want you to not have this hanging over you. 340 00:18:54,560 --> 00:18:57,159 Speaker 1: But like in my mind I know best, like I 341 00:18:57,359 --> 00:19:00,480 Speaker 1: know that like this is going to happen this time. 342 00:19:00,600 --> 00:19:02,600 Speaker 1: I don't even know why I thought that. I think 343 00:19:02,640 --> 00:19:05,040 Speaker 1: I was just so desperate that I was like, if 344 00:19:05,080 --> 00:19:08,040 Speaker 1: I say it, and then I'm just because I promise myself. 345 00:19:08,080 --> 00:19:10,399 Speaker 1: I'm like, I'm gonna be chill, I'm gonna go home, 346 00:19:11,160 --> 00:19:13,520 Speaker 1: I'm gonna be fine at Christmas. I'm not gonna be 347 00:19:13,560 --> 00:19:16,200 Speaker 1: bugging out. I'm not gonna be testing. I'm not gonna 348 00:19:16,200 --> 00:19:18,760 Speaker 1: have a mental break at Christmas Eve, like I'm gonna 349 00:19:19,240 --> 00:19:21,680 Speaker 1: And I just kind of told myself that. And then 350 00:19:21,680 --> 00:19:24,520 Speaker 1: when I came back and they were like, you're you're pregnant, 351 00:19:24,520 --> 00:19:28,399 Speaker 1: I was like, but then you know they still then 352 00:19:28,480 --> 00:19:31,280 Speaker 1: every every day you go in to test your levels 353 00:19:31,280 --> 00:19:34,560 Speaker 1: when you had repeated issues, So then it's like that 354 00:19:34,680 --> 00:19:40,200 Speaker 1: mind game every single day. It only and you're like, 355 00:19:40,720 --> 00:19:43,520 Speaker 1: but I was like, it's okay, that's the terrible number. 356 00:19:43,560 --> 00:19:46,040 Speaker 1: You know, you just need to start like tricking yourself 357 00:19:46,119 --> 00:19:49,199 Speaker 1: to try, you know, to do that. But it's I know, 358 00:19:49,320 --> 00:19:52,520 Speaker 1: there are just so many people out there, and there's 359 00:19:52,560 --> 00:19:55,879 Speaker 1: so many husbands also that have no idea what to 360 00:19:55,920 --> 00:20:01,359 Speaker 1: do when their wife is in the state. So, um, 361 00:20:01,440 --> 00:20:04,359 Speaker 1: I know we're having some different guests in and I 362 00:20:04,440 --> 00:20:07,480 Speaker 1: also know that we have a ton of questions to 363 00:20:07,520 --> 00:20:10,000 Speaker 1: get through, and we're kind of writing down questions as 364 00:20:10,040 --> 00:20:12,040 Speaker 1: they come for the doctor because I still don't know 365 00:20:12,040 --> 00:20:14,840 Speaker 1: what a killer cell is. I don't really either, because 366 00:20:14,880 --> 00:20:17,320 Speaker 1: I the one thing my doctor did say is like, 367 00:20:17,640 --> 00:20:21,359 Speaker 1: don't go on web md. Do you do? You're not 368 00:20:21,480 --> 00:20:26,800 Speaker 1: a doctor, So quit trying to diagnose yourself over my diagnosis, 369 00:20:27,560 --> 00:20:31,320 Speaker 1: because then you know, you become really crazy. Well, I 370 00:20:31,320 --> 00:20:37,600 Speaker 1: wonder our killer cells common and I don't know. My 371 00:20:37,960 --> 00:20:41,080 Speaker 1: guess is what happens. What I was told, but also 372 00:20:41,240 --> 00:20:43,560 Speaker 1: remember I was told not in the best state, was 373 00:20:44,280 --> 00:20:48,080 Speaker 1: that your body thinks that your baby is like a 374 00:20:48,119 --> 00:20:50,959 Speaker 1: foreign object and it goes to like get rid of it. 375 00:20:51,040 --> 00:20:53,680 Speaker 1: So that's why you need the blood thinners and the steroids. 376 00:20:54,400 --> 00:20:57,359 Speaker 1: So but I mean there's been so many questions. We 377 00:20:57,400 --> 00:21:00,439 Speaker 1: also need to find out about pcos A lot of 378 00:21:00,440 --> 00:21:03,320 Speaker 1: people ask me about that. And then there's also just 379 00:21:03,400 --> 00:21:05,920 Speaker 1: people that have a lot of questions about freezing their eggs, 380 00:21:06,480 --> 00:21:10,679 Speaker 1: um when they're even when they're not ready to have 381 00:21:10,760 --> 00:21:14,520 Speaker 1: a baby. So what do you do after when you 382 00:21:14,560 --> 00:21:16,520 Speaker 1: don't want to use the rest of them? You have 383 00:21:16,600 --> 00:21:18,320 Speaker 1: to that you have to save them like in the 384 00:21:18,720 --> 00:21:21,480 Speaker 1: or you have to donate or I mean some people 385 00:21:21,520 --> 00:21:25,480 Speaker 1: I think even sell. There's so many different things that 386 00:21:25,520 --> 00:21:29,440 Speaker 1: like we don't even know. Yeah, I have all kinds 387 00:21:29,440 --> 00:21:31,320 Speaker 1: of questions, I know, so do I. So with that, 388 00:21:31,359 --> 00:21:34,160 Speaker 1: should we take a little break and then um, when 389 00:21:34,160 --> 00:21:36,320 Speaker 1: we come back, I think Sadie Murray is going to 390 00:21:36,440 --> 00:21:47,840 Speaker 1: come in and talk to us about her journey. Hey, 391 00:21:47,880 --> 00:21:50,639 Speaker 1: so we're back with Teddy, t Pod and Jen and 392 00:21:50,720 --> 00:21:54,080 Speaker 1: I are going to ask Sadie some questions because she 393 00:21:54,280 --> 00:21:59,000 Speaker 1: just recently froze her eggs. So give us the deeds. 394 00:21:59,040 --> 00:22:02,480 Speaker 1: What lad you to want to start freezing your eggs? 395 00:22:02,800 --> 00:22:06,000 Speaker 1: Your age, give us, give us everything. So I had 396 00:22:06,200 --> 00:22:09,679 Speaker 1: just um ended a relationship, you know, when I was 397 00:22:09,760 --> 00:22:11,560 Speaker 1: I was I dated this guy who I thought I 398 00:22:11,600 --> 00:22:15,040 Speaker 1: was going to marry, and I was thirty four when 399 00:22:15,080 --> 00:22:18,520 Speaker 1: we broke up and he told me, actually, I don't 400 00:22:18,520 --> 00:22:19,920 Speaker 1: think I ever want to have a family, and I 401 00:22:20,000 --> 00:22:22,359 Speaker 1: felt like, are you kidding me? Like I just wasted 402 00:22:22,960 --> 00:22:26,760 Speaker 1: this time with you, and it blew my mind. But 403 00:22:26,800 --> 00:22:28,720 Speaker 1: it was also kind of like the fire that I 404 00:22:28,760 --> 00:22:31,760 Speaker 1: needed under my ass to take control of the situation. 405 00:22:31,840 --> 00:22:35,000 Speaker 1: And so I met with a doctor um in Newport 406 00:22:35,040 --> 00:22:39,880 Speaker 1: Beach and I got all the info. Then I chickened out, 407 00:22:40,160 --> 00:22:41,960 Speaker 1: like I made my appointment. Then I was like, no, 408 00:22:42,080 --> 00:22:45,600 Speaker 1: I've got time, only thirty four. And then I went 409 00:22:45,680 --> 00:22:48,760 Speaker 1: back in and he was like no, literally, like time 410 00:22:48,840 --> 00:22:52,679 Speaker 1: is not on your side, like it's not like like yeah, 411 00:22:52,760 --> 00:22:54,400 Speaker 1: and he was like, whether you do it with me 412 00:22:54,600 --> 00:22:57,160 Speaker 1: or someone else, like you just need to know the facts, 413 00:22:57,200 --> 00:22:59,280 Speaker 1: because I kind of felt like, and this is you 414 00:22:59,359 --> 00:23:03,000 Speaker 1: at thirty four, Yeah, so this is I'm thirty six now, Okay. 415 00:23:03,040 --> 00:23:05,119 Speaker 1: So I meet with him and he's he kind of 416 00:23:05,160 --> 00:23:08,360 Speaker 1: I mean, I got over the emotional aspect of it, 417 00:23:08,440 --> 00:23:10,800 Speaker 1: like this isn't the way I planned it, this isn't 418 00:23:10,880 --> 00:23:16,320 Speaker 1: what I wanted necessarily, but I wanted to empower myself. Right. 419 00:23:16,680 --> 00:23:18,720 Speaker 1: So then finally I turned thirty five and I'm like, 420 00:23:18,760 --> 00:23:21,600 Speaker 1: all right, it's a d day. Here we go, get 421 00:23:21,720 --> 00:23:23,679 Speaker 1: this over with. And I thought, you know what, and 422 00:23:23,720 --> 00:23:25,520 Speaker 1: if I can do this, if I'm gonna be a mom, 423 00:23:25,560 --> 00:23:28,280 Speaker 1: you have to be able to handle anything, so why 424 00:23:28,320 --> 00:23:31,720 Speaker 1: not show it off now kind of a thing? Right? So, yeah, 425 00:23:31,800 --> 00:23:35,720 Speaker 1: I did it. I So some of the listeners questions are, 426 00:23:35,800 --> 00:23:37,840 Speaker 1: if you're going in solely to freeze your eggs, how 427 00:23:37,880 --> 00:23:41,119 Speaker 1: much does it cost? Mine was about twelve thousand dollars 428 00:23:41,240 --> 00:23:43,520 Speaker 1: twelve thousand, and like for your did you do it 429 00:23:43,560 --> 00:23:45,920 Speaker 1: one time or multiple? I've only done it once because 430 00:23:45,960 --> 00:23:48,840 Speaker 1: I got a nice amount of eggs the first, you 431 00:23:48,880 --> 00:23:50,840 Speaker 1: know when I did it, But I have I have 432 00:23:50,880 --> 00:23:53,080 Speaker 1: a couple of girlfriends that you know have done it 433 00:23:53,240 --> 00:23:55,800 Speaker 1: twice three times. I mean, you do it as many 434 00:23:55,800 --> 00:23:59,280 Speaker 1: times as you need to. And then what is the like, 435 00:23:59,800 --> 00:24:02,040 Speaker 1: for lack of a better word, the storage, Like, what 436 00:24:02,200 --> 00:24:04,520 Speaker 1: is the right monthly for that? I think mine is 437 00:24:04,800 --> 00:24:08,520 Speaker 1: it's maybe five hundred a year, So it's not horrible. 438 00:24:08,560 --> 00:24:12,040 Speaker 1: I mean, isn't that where the storage like a storage? 439 00:24:14,880 --> 00:24:18,760 Speaker 1: I was thinking about this seriously. I was thinking about 440 00:24:18,760 --> 00:24:19,959 Speaker 1: this the other day I was like, how are my 441 00:24:20,040 --> 00:24:23,359 Speaker 1: eggs doing? I'm to st visit them. I would like 442 00:24:23,440 --> 00:24:25,960 Speaker 1: to someday. Yeah, I have photos of them on my phone. 443 00:24:25,960 --> 00:24:27,880 Speaker 1: It was so funny, you guys, I'm in a group 444 00:24:27,920 --> 00:24:29,680 Speaker 1: text with my girlfriends from college. We're all in the 445 00:24:29,760 --> 00:24:32,080 Speaker 1: same sorority and all of them are married and have 446 00:24:32,320 --> 00:24:34,359 Speaker 1: you know, at least one kid. My best friend just 447 00:24:34,400 --> 00:24:36,680 Speaker 1: had her third and we're all the same age. And 448 00:24:36,960 --> 00:24:39,360 Speaker 1: my friends like, show me pictures if your new babies. 449 00:24:39,400 --> 00:24:41,400 Speaker 1: And I'm on this group text and I'm like, are 450 00:24:41,400 --> 00:24:43,560 Speaker 1: you serious? Like that's so annoying. So they're all like 451 00:24:43,640 --> 00:24:47,240 Speaker 1: cute photos of like you know them, like riding bikes 452 00:24:47,280 --> 00:24:49,199 Speaker 1: and stuff like that. And so I sent the actual 453 00:24:49,200 --> 00:24:51,800 Speaker 1: pictures of the eggs that I got from my doctor 454 00:24:52,359 --> 00:24:58,280 Speaker 1: and I was like, here are my little popsicles. So 455 00:24:58,760 --> 00:25:02,719 Speaker 1: when now the you've done that, what are kind of 456 00:25:02,760 --> 00:25:07,160 Speaker 1: your next thoughts? Like? Where where's your headspace? Now? I 457 00:25:07,200 --> 00:25:12,359 Speaker 1: feel like, you know, big dick energy. Yeah, I feel 458 00:25:12,400 --> 00:25:15,600 Speaker 1: like I have that now like when I'm now when 459 00:25:15,600 --> 00:25:18,119 Speaker 1: I'm dating, like, I don't feel like I have to 460 00:25:18,200 --> 00:25:22,560 Speaker 1: settle because you know, I want to get married and 461 00:25:22,600 --> 00:25:26,840 Speaker 1: have a family. Now I'm walking into this chapter of 462 00:25:26,880 --> 00:25:31,040 Speaker 1: my life with a sense of confidence that whether or 463 00:25:31,040 --> 00:25:33,560 Speaker 1: not I use them or not, the fact that I 464 00:25:33,640 --> 00:25:36,080 Speaker 1: know that I did this for myself and for my 465 00:25:36,160 --> 00:25:41,080 Speaker 1: future family or for my future husband. It's making me, 466 00:25:41,640 --> 00:25:45,400 Speaker 1: you know, feel like I have more options. And there's 467 00:25:45,400 --> 00:25:49,280 Speaker 1: nothing better than feeling like you're more free, I think, right, 468 00:25:49,680 --> 00:25:52,840 Speaker 1: because I have so many people I know that are 469 00:25:52,920 --> 00:25:55,560 Speaker 1: now divorced. I mean, I'm thirty six, I was engaged 470 00:25:55,600 --> 00:25:57,919 Speaker 1: at one point, broke it off, and I feel like 471 00:25:57,960 --> 00:26:01,040 Speaker 1: now like statistically, I've like skipped my divorce if I 472 00:26:01,040 --> 00:26:03,600 Speaker 1: was never going to have one, you know what I mean. 473 00:26:03,640 --> 00:26:07,320 Speaker 1: Like I'm like, Okay, well I don't save some money, 474 00:26:07,359 --> 00:26:10,240 Speaker 1: I spend it on the eggs. Um. Yeah, So I 475 00:26:10,240 --> 00:26:12,520 Speaker 1: think now the next step is I mean, I'm single, 476 00:26:12,600 --> 00:26:16,719 Speaker 1: I'm dating, and I'm It's funny though, I almost sometimes 477 00:26:16,720 --> 00:26:18,920 Speaker 1: I have to stop myself from like telling the guy, 478 00:26:19,480 --> 00:26:22,880 Speaker 1: oh hey, I throze my eggs because like, like too much, 479 00:26:23,160 --> 00:26:25,720 Speaker 1: I don't want. I Also, I know that that's like 480 00:26:25,720 --> 00:26:28,200 Speaker 1: a concern to like, if I'm a guy and I'm 481 00:26:28,280 --> 00:26:30,520 Speaker 1: dating around, it's like, of course you're gonna want to 482 00:26:30,560 --> 00:26:34,000 Speaker 1: pick the fresher eggs. Of course you're gonna go if 483 00:26:34,040 --> 00:26:37,520 Speaker 1: you're younger. Yeah, sure, guys are really think I don't 484 00:26:37,520 --> 00:26:41,000 Speaker 1: know date one, Like, don't bring it up on date one. 485 00:26:41,119 --> 00:26:44,080 Speaker 1: I have you guys, I have brought it up on it. No. 486 00:26:44,240 --> 00:26:47,040 Speaker 1: I have been like yeah, and they're like, so do mind? 487 00:26:47,240 --> 00:26:49,280 Speaker 1: Like how old are you? Come back on the How 488 00:26:49,320 --> 00:26:52,760 Speaker 1: to Date episode? Oh my god, Lord help us all 489 00:26:52,800 --> 00:26:55,120 Speaker 1: with that. I've got so many stories. And how did 490 00:26:55,160 --> 00:26:58,080 Speaker 1: you feel during the process of when you were giving 491 00:26:58,080 --> 00:27:01,000 Speaker 1: yourself the shots and all of that. I was a 492 00:27:01,040 --> 00:27:03,240 Speaker 1: different thing because when I was going through it, I 493 00:27:03,280 --> 00:27:08,440 Speaker 1: was trying to get pregnant apparently, versus you were doing 494 00:27:08,440 --> 00:27:11,840 Speaker 1: it just to make sure that I had you had 495 00:27:11,880 --> 00:27:16,440 Speaker 1: the security. Yeah. Well I was a little diva about it, 496 00:27:16,520 --> 00:27:19,840 Speaker 1: like I was like really afraid to I've never given 497 00:27:19,840 --> 00:27:21,960 Speaker 1: myself an injection before, Like I'm not a drug addict, 498 00:27:21,960 --> 00:27:23,560 Speaker 1: you know what, even like I'm just like I'm not 499 00:27:23,680 --> 00:27:25,760 Speaker 1: used to it, Like I'm just I don't know, like 500 00:27:26,200 --> 00:27:28,600 Speaker 1: I do get you know, injections in my face. But 501 00:27:28,680 --> 00:27:32,000 Speaker 1: like that's someone else is doing it, right. This is different. 502 00:27:32,040 --> 00:27:33,439 Speaker 1: This is like, oh my god, if I miss and 503 00:27:33,480 --> 00:27:35,560 Speaker 1: I hit a nerve or something, what's going to happen? 504 00:27:36,080 --> 00:27:38,959 Speaker 1: So I decided to make it a thing for my 505 00:27:39,000 --> 00:27:41,240 Speaker 1: first shot, and I like went to Malibu and stayed 506 00:27:41,280 --> 00:27:44,760 Speaker 1: the night in like at the at the Malibu beach 507 00:27:44,840 --> 00:27:47,000 Speaker 1: in and I like woke up and I like prayed, 508 00:27:47,040 --> 00:27:48,640 Speaker 1: and I like was like, Okay, here we go. We're 509 00:27:48,640 --> 00:27:51,359 Speaker 1: doing this journey because it's like, you know, eighteen days 510 00:27:51,400 --> 00:27:54,800 Speaker 1: of shots. And I grabbed my my stomach and I 511 00:27:54,840 --> 00:27:56,680 Speaker 1: was like, thank god, I've gained a little weight. There's 512 00:27:56,680 --> 00:27:59,119 Speaker 1: some fat there. And I just pretended like I was 513 00:27:59,160 --> 00:28:02,600 Speaker 1: injecting a piece of chicken or something, and I was like, Okay, 514 00:28:02,640 --> 00:28:04,320 Speaker 1: let's do this. This isn't my body. Here we go. 515 00:28:04,400 --> 00:28:08,879 Speaker 1: And it was fine to YouTube video totally so many times, 516 00:28:08,880 --> 00:28:10,959 Speaker 1: and then I like would I found myself like talking 517 00:28:10,960 --> 00:28:12,720 Speaker 1: to the lady and I was like, is this right, 518 00:28:12,800 --> 00:28:15,720 Speaker 1: And she's like it's like she's not really there. But 519 00:28:15,800 --> 00:28:19,159 Speaker 1: I was like, really, it was scary. But now that 520 00:28:19,240 --> 00:28:21,760 Speaker 1: you're saying that, I had totally just blocked out the 521 00:28:21,800 --> 00:28:25,040 Speaker 1: memory of giving myself shots. That's the crazy thing about 522 00:28:25,440 --> 00:28:27,760 Speaker 1: doing this process. Like I had given myself so many 523 00:28:27,800 --> 00:28:30,280 Speaker 1: different rounds of shots that I remember I would go 524 00:28:30,400 --> 00:28:33,840 Speaker 1: in and it would be crunchy in the spot because 525 00:28:33,880 --> 00:28:36,480 Speaker 1: I had injected the same area, so because you know 526 00:28:36,520 --> 00:28:40,760 Speaker 1: you have your comforted Yeah, okay, this spot right, jam. 527 00:28:40,880 --> 00:28:45,760 Speaker 1: But then yeah, she's right, Daddy's so good about giving 528 00:28:45,760 --> 00:28:50,040 Speaker 1: it in this spot, right. But after so many rounds, 529 00:28:50,120 --> 00:28:52,800 Speaker 1: that spot is like you know what, f you go 530 00:28:52,960 --> 00:28:55,920 Speaker 1: find a new spot? Yeah did the other side. Yeah, 531 00:28:56,400 --> 00:28:59,280 Speaker 1: but I totally blacked that out until you were just 532 00:28:59,320 --> 00:29:02,360 Speaker 1: saying that now. Like it was weird too, because then 533 00:29:02,360 --> 00:29:04,120 Speaker 1: you get a little bit like after you've done it, 534 00:29:04,240 --> 00:29:06,240 Speaker 1: maybe you're in for like a week, you're like, I'm 535 00:29:06,280 --> 00:29:08,600 Speaker 1: a pro, you know, you get like a little cocky. 536 00:29:08,720 --> 00:29:10,840 Speaker 1: Like I was like, I can go to this party 537 00:29:10,920 --> 00:29:12,800 Speaker 1: now and then I'll just do it in the bathroom. 538 00:29:12,840 --> 00:29:14,640 Speaker 1: And I did. I was like, this hasn't been to 539 00:29:14,760 --> 00:29:16,400 Speaker 1: ruin my life. I mean I didn't like drink while 540 00:29:16,440 --> 00:29:18,040 Speaker 1: I was doing it or anything like that, but like 541 00:29:18,520 --> 00:29:23,040 Speaker 1: I it was because I did it um like around Halloween, 542 00:29:23,160 --> 00:29:25,200 Speaker 1: like into November, and it was like, you know you 543 00:29:25,280 --> 00:29:29,200 Speaker 1: just start like going to different people's holiday holiday stuff. Yeah, 544 00:29:29,200 --> 00:29:30,720 Speaker 1: it was just more of that time, and I was 545 00:29:30,760 --> 00:29:32,880 Speaker 1: like I had birthday parties and things. I was like, 546 00:29:32,920 --> 00:29:35,680 Speaker 1: I'm bringing my kit, I'm bringing my needles. I talk 547 00:29:35,720 --> 00:29:38,520 Speaker 1: about my purse and I did it. Would you would 548 00:29:38,520 --> 00:29:41,000 Speaker 1: you consider doing another round if more time went by, 549 00:29:41,400 --> 00:29:44,480 Speaker 1: or do you think if you were to meet somebody, 550 00:29:44,560 --> 00:29:47,360 Speaker 1: Let's say I just had somebody in calling it calling 551 00:29:47,360 --> 00:29:49,280 Speaker 1: in your now in eight weeks, so you meet somebody 552 00:29:49,280 --> 00:29:51,640 Speaker 1: in eight weeks from now, you fall in love. Would 553 00:29:51,680 --> 00:29:53,920 Speaker 1: you try to get pregnant naturally or would you use 554 00:29:54,000 --> 00:29:57,400 Speaker 1: your younger, fresher eggs. I would try and get pregnant 555 00:29:57,480 --> 00:30:01,480 Speaker 1: naturally first. I think that's ideal, and obviously I want 556 00:30:01,520 --> 00:30:03,760 Speaker 1: to save those eggs, so if I because that's what 557 00:30:03,840 --> 00:30:06,000 Speaker 1: my doctor said. Um, he was like, you know, you 558 00:30:06,040 --> 00:30:08,160 Speaker 1: may not even use these. I have people come in 559 00:30:08,240 --> 00:30:09,720 Speaker 1: and then they meet the love of their life a 560 00:30:09,800 --> 00:30:12,920 Speaker 1: year later because they're just so like, there's something about 561 00:30:12,960 --> 00:30:15,880 Speaker 1: being free of this, you know. Do you think you 562 00:30:15,880 --> 00:30:18,440 Speaker 1: would keep them stored anyway forever? So okay. I was 563 00:30:18,440 --> 00:30:21,920 Speaker 1: actually just talking about this with my one of my 564 00:30:22,000 --> 00:30:25,360 Speaker 1: best guy friends. Him and his partner are talking about 565 00:30:25,400 --> 00:30:27,600 Speaker 1: having kids, and he was like, we were hanging out 566 00:30:27,600 --> 00:30:29,520 Speaker 1: one night. We've known each other since kindergarten, so he 567 00:30:29,520 --> 00:30:32,360 Speaker 1: has the he can ask me this stuff. So we've 568 00:30:32,360 --> 00:30:35,040 Speaker 1: had a little wine and he's like, I've got the 569 00:30:35,160 --> 00:30:38,360 Speaker 1: energy and the courage to ask you this, Can I 570 00:30:38,440 --> 00:30:42,120 Speaker 1: have one of your eggs? It's like no, I'm like, 571 00:30:42,160 --> 00:30:46,080 Speaker 1: are you kidding me? That's no. No, I'm like really protective. 572 00:30:46,120 --> 00:30:49,800 Speaker 1: He's like, okay, but what if you sorry, Sadie, what 573 00:30:49,880 --> 00:30:54,040 Speaker 1: if you die? And I was like, You're so lucky. 574 00:30:54,120 --> 00:30:56,280 Speaker 1: I'm on my second glass of wine right now, Like 575 00:30:56,880 --> 00:30:59,720 Speaker 1: what in the actual okay? And I was like, actually, 576 00:30:59,760 --> 00:31:03,040 Speaker 1: I was like I don't when I signed the form, 577 00:31:03,080 --> 00:31:05,000 Speaker 1: you know where you say, what do you want to 578 00:31:05,040 --> 00:31:07,680 Speaker 1: do with them? Like if you do pass away? Like 579 00:31:07,880 --> 00:31:10,120 Speaker 1: I don't know what's going to happen in life. There 580 00:31:10,120 --> 00:31:12,680 Speaker 1: were only two options, and it was either you donate 581 00:31:12,760 --> 00:31:16,240 Speaker 1: them to science, to people who need them or science 582 00:31:16,320 --> 00:31:19,880 Speaker 1: or what have you, and or you destroy them. I 583 00:31:20,000 --> 00:31:24,400 Speaker 1: chose the latter because I just felt like that's their 584 00:31:24,440 --> 00:31:26,640 Speaker 1: mind and I don't want anyone else to have them now. 585 00:31:27,120 --> 00:31:29,040 Speaker 1: But I think I was hopped up on hormones when 586 00:31:29,080 --> 00:31:33,040 Speaker 1: I signed it, and so now yeah, like I'm like 587 00:31:33,120 --> 00:31:36,640 Speaker 1: I definitely shot, you know, but like now I totally 588 00:31:36,640 --> 00:31:39,640 Speaker 1: have a different perspective, Like now I may give them 589 00:31:39,640 --> 00:31:43,360 Speaker 1: to a family that like can't or my sisters, you know, 590 00:31:44,360 --> 00:31:46,000 Speaker 1: that's what I'm gonna do. So that's what I'm gonna 591 00:31:46,240 --> 00:31:48,600 Speaker 1: I need to, you know, obviously work it up, but 592 00:31:48,600 --> 00:31:50,840 Speaker 1: I don't. Also, they shouldn't make you sign things when 593 00:31:50,880 --> 00:31:56,720 Speaker 1: you're not. I was such a psychopath at the end. 594 00:31:56,840 --> 00:31:58,440 Speaker 1: At the end, I was like I was. I was 595 00:31:58,520 --> 00:32:01,720 Speaker 1: literally like I was great up until two days before 596 00:32:01,760 --> 00:32:03,360 Speaker 1: and I called my mom and I was like, I 597 00:32:03,400 --> 00:32:07,120 Speaker 1: don't know if I want to yell at people, cry 598 00:32:07,680 --> 00:32:10,520 Speaker 1: or just like fall asleep. I don't know what's happening 599 00:32:10,520 --> 00:32:12,720 Speaker 1: in my life right now, but like I shouldn't be driving. 600 00:32:14,280 --> 00:32:16,520 Speaker 1: I told him about how I broke down going because 601 00:32:16,520 --> 00:32:18,480 Speaker 1: I missed the entrance for taco, about I mean things. 602 00:32:18,640 --> 00:32:21,600 Speaker 1: I swear to god, this is real. This is real. 603 00:32:22,520 --> 00:32:26,360 Speaker 1: You turn the smallest thing is that for real? A 604 00:32:26,440 --> 00:32:35,560 Speaker 1: full breakout my husband, and it's a talk about I 605 00:32:35,600 --> 00:32:39,320 Speaker 1: couldn't find the place to you, like full break and 606 00:32:39,360 --> 00:32:41,840 Speaker 1: you have to imagine he's at work. He's like, hey, babe, 607 00:32:43,320 --> 00:32:47,520 Speaker 1: you good, You're not enough? Actually okay, like did you 608 00:32:47,520 --> 00:32:51,960 Speaker 1: get arrested? Like what's happening up? I just wanted to 609 00:32:52,080 --> 00:32:59,800 Speaker 1: be in cheese. Oh my, that is epic right there. 610 00:33:00,200 --> 00:33:01,720 Speaker 1: And then you're and then I get off the phone, 611 00:33:01,800 --> 00:33:06,000 Speaker 1: like it could have been nicer. Yeah, how did he 612 00:33:06,200 --> 00:33:08,760 Speaker 1: offer to get me? One? Didn't he offer to leave 613 00:33:08,880 --> 00:33:12,080 Speaker 1: his job and get me? And You're like, I'm not 614 00:33:12,120 --> 00:33:15,360 Speaker 1: even pregnant yet, Oh my god. No. I know I 615 00:33:15,400 --> 00:33:17,760 Speaker 1: had to like not go on dates during that time too, 616 00:33:17,800 --> 00:33:20,680 Speaker 1: because I was good because you're already bringing up date one. 617 00:33:20,880 --> 00:33:25,400 Speaker 1: I know, well you know when you do bring it 618 00:33:25,480 --> 00:33:27,040 Speaker 1: up date one, and the guy's like good to know 619 00:33:27,240 --> 00:33:31,320 Speaker 1: that he's probably know I And honestly, I don't care 620 00:33:31,560 --> 00:33:33,560 Speaker 1: at this point, like I'm at a I'm at a 621 00:33:33,560 --> 00:33:35,960 Speaker 1: place in my life where like this is me take 622 00:33:36,000 --> 00:33:37,600 Speaker 1: it or leave it. Like obviously I'm not going to 623 00:33:37,720 --> 00:33:40,080 Speaker 1: like roll up and like show them the photos of 624 00:33:40,080 --> 00:33:42,920 Speaker 1: my eggs, but like you know, if it comes up, 625 00:33:42,920 --> 00:33:44,920 Speaker 1: like I feel like I'm proud of it, Like I'm 626 00:33:44,920 --> 00:33:46,600 Speaker 1: like I did this, This is so cool. And I 627 00:33:46,600 --> 00:33:48,480 Speaker 1: think like you're saying, like the guy that is my 628 00:33:48,520 --> 00:33:50,640 Speaker 1: guy will be like thank you for doing that, because 629 00:33:51,160 --> 00:33:54,680 Speaker 1: I don't want your old eggs. But also, I mean, 630 00:33:54,680 --> 00:33:57,840 Speaker 1: it's crazy even getting pregnant this time. I mean, when 631 00:33:57,840 --> 00:34:00,160 Speaker 1: I went in and everything was good, he's like, well, 632 00:34:00,160 --> 00:34:05,560 Speaker 1: because you are advanced maternal age. I'm thirty eight, he goes, 633 00:34:05,640 --> 00:34:08,920 Speaker 1: you go and do another round of testing the insurance 634 00:34:08,960 --> 00:34:11,560 Speaker 1: covers this time, and I'm like, advanced maternal you know, 635 00:34:11,600 --> 00:34:14,120 Speaker 1: I didn't even like hearing those words. And like thirty 636 00:34:14,160 --> 00:34:18,840 Speaker 1: eight is considered advanced geriatric. Yeah, Like, which is gotta 637 00:34:19,080 --> 00:34:21,440 Speaker 1: I mean, it just puts so much pressure on people 638 00:34:21,560 --> 00:34:25,080 Speaker 1: that you know, everybody's getting married later. Now. It's not 639 00:34:25,160 --> 00:34:27,560 Speaker 1: like when you know, we were kids and our parents 640 00:34:27,560 --> 00:34:29,279 Speaker 1: all met in high school and they all got My 641 00:34:29,320 --> 00:34:32,440 Speaker 1: parents met when they were nine and eleven, they went 642 00:34:32,480 --> 00:34:35,120 Speaker 1: to prom together. Like this is the stuff that we 643 00:34:35,160 --> 00:34:37,600 Speaker 1: have to see. What's happening now? People are getting married 644 00:34:37,600 --> 00:34:41,640 Speaker 1: in their thirties, forties, whatever. And so when you're going 645 00:34:41,640 --> 00:34:45,200 Speaker 1: into the doctor advanced maternal age at thirty eight, you're like, wow, 646 00:34:45,320 --> 00:34:48,000 Speaker 1: imagine going in there. And I mean when so many 647 00:34:48,040 --> 00:34:50,319 Speaker 1: of my followers are like, I'm thirty seven years old 648 00:34:50,440 --> 00:34:52,880 Speaker 1: and I'm trying to decide if I should freeze my age. 649 00:34:53,600 --> 00:34:58,080 Speaker 1: But there's also the pressure of you know, I do 650 00:34:58,200 --> 00:35:01,160 Speaker 1: freeze megs and then I don't eat somebody, and then 651 00:35:01,200 --> 00:35:03,920 Speaker 1: now it's five years later and I definitely want to 652 00:35:03,920 --> 00:35:06,279 Speaker 1: have a child. Yeah, do you do it on your own? 653 00:35:06,280 --> 00:35:09,719 Speaker 1: Do you do it on your own. I wouldn't, but 654 00:35:10,040 --> 00:35:12,879 Speaker 1: I don't think that it's I think you can't. I mean, 655 00:35:12,880 --> 00:35:15,560 Speaker 1: obviously it's a six year old Sadie wouldn't write. Who 656 00:35:15,560 --> 00:35:21,600 Speaker 1: knows where I'll be. I'll be like the Octo Mom. 657 00:35:21,640 --> 00:35:26,680 Speaker 1: I thought about the honestly single Octo Mom Sadie. Everyone 658 00:35:26,680 --> 00:35:28,840 Speaker 1: will be like, wow, that's a reality show. Then I 659 00:35:28,840 --> 00:35:30,800 Speaker 1: can pay for it. Oh my god, it'll be so exciting, 660 00:35:30,960 --> 00:35:32,680 Speaker 1: you know what. I'll pitch it, I'll produce. Thank you. 661 00:35:32,680 --> 00:35:35,200 Speaker 1: Oh my god, I really appreciate it. Yeah, you know 662 00:35:35,360 --> 00:35:38,080 Speaker 1: right now, I would be like, no, I'm I'm going 663 00:35:38,239 --> 00:35:40,480 Speaker 1: I want my person. I want my person and I 664 00:35:40,520 --> 00:35:42,319 Speaker 1: want to have a family with that guy. But at 665 00:35:42,320 --> 00:35:45,120 Speaker 1: the same time, you know, I'm also I'm not opposed 666 00:35:45,160 --> 00:35:47,319 Speaker 1: to adopting, like because I don't even know if. I mean, 667 00:35:47,480 --> 00:35:49,759 Speaker 1: the eggs are viable and they're great, but like, who 668 00:35:49,800 --> 00:35:52,000 Speaker 1: knows if I can carry it? Who knows? If you know, 669 00:35:52,080 --> 00:35:54,120 Speaker 1: would you be open to adopting now or would you 670 00:35:54,160 --> 00:35:57,359 Speaker 1: want to wait as well for that? I mean I 671 00:35:57,400 --> 00:36:01,520 Speaker 1: want to wait. Yeah, and you you told me that 672 00:36:01,600 --> 00:36:07,280 Speaker 1: you're I haven't adopted brother from Guatemala. I was twenty 673 00:36:07,440 --> 00:36:11,000 Speaker 1: seven when my mom adopted him when he was five. 674 00:36:11,440 --> 00:36:13,680 Speaker 1: Can you walk us through that process a little bit, 675 00:36:13,760 --> 00:36:16,440 Speaker 1: because a lot of people were asking about adoption also 676 00:36:16,840 --> 00:36:20,960 Speaker 1: in regards to from foster to adoption as well. Fostering 677 00:36:21,080 --> 00:36:24,200 Speaker 1: is so important, especially you know, I'm from Detroit and 678 00:36:24,200 --> 00:36:27,640 Speaker 1: I worked in the foster care, like in foster care, 679 00:36:27,719 --> 00:36:30,839 Speaker 1: working with those kids as a therapist, and there are 680 00:36:31,120 --> 00:36:33,880 Speaker 1: great foster pearance. Of course we always hear about the 681 00:36:33,920 --> 00:36:38,479 Speaker 1: horrible stories in the news, but the majority of them 682 00:36:38,840 --> 00:36:41,799 Speaker 1: do it because they love children and they want to 683 00:36:41,840 --> 00:36:44,040 Speaker 1: take care of them and they want to give them stipila. 684 00:36:44,120 --> 00:36:46,959 Speaker 1: How do you even get started doing something like that. 685 00:36:47,360 --> 00:36:53,920 Speaker 1: It's a it's a pretty long process of background checks, interviews, 686 00:36:54,640 --> 00:36:58,720 Speaker 1: um you know, uh, letters from people in your life 687 00:36:59,520 --> 00:37:02,320 Speaker 1: so that you know that bouge for you as a parent, 688 00:37:02,480 --> 00:37:06,239 Speaker 1: as a human, why you're doing this. They come in 689 00:37:06,280 --> 00:37:09,239 Speaker 1: and check the home, They come in and observe. It's 690 00:37:09,239 --> 00:37:14,840 Speaker 1: a it's a really long process because they're placing kids 691 00:37:14,880 --> 00:37:19,719 Speaker 1: in these homes until they're either adopted a lot of them. 692 00:37:19,920 --> 00:37:22,600 Speaker 1: You know, there's a huge percentage of kids in the 693 00:37:22,640 --> 00:37:28,960 Speaker 1: foster in foster care that never get adopted, right, But 694 00:37:29,120 --> 00:37:33,600 Speaker 1: these families are angels. So when my mom went to Guatemala, 695 00:37:33,640 --> 00:37:35,120 Speaker 1: she had gone to Mexico and then she went to 696 00:37:35,160 --> 00:37:38,560 Speaker 1: Guatemala and she was visiting to go with like a 697 00:37:38,560 --> 00:37:40,600 Speaker 1: group where she was just going on. She was just 698 00:37:40,719 --> 00:37:46,400 Speaker 1: going on vacation, and she visited uh An orphanage and 699 00:37:46,680 --> 00:37:49,600 Speaker 1: she met Diego and he was four, he had just 700 00:37:49,640 --> 00:37:52,399 Speaker 1: turned four, and it took her a year to adopt him. 701 00:37:52,560 --> 00:37:58,960 Speaker 1: Very Angelina Jolia of her very I mean, you just 702 00:37:59,040 --> 00:38:02,520 Speaker 1: go on vacation and pick up a kid, okay, kid, 703 00:38:02,920 --> 00:38:05,840 Speaker 1: I always look for a sun hat or but sure 704 00:38:06,239 --> 00:38:09,960 Speaker 1: that works too. That was sorry. I had to light 705 00:38:10,000 --> 00:38:12,880 Speaker 1: in the mood of touch, just a touch. We needed 706 00:38:12,920 --> 00:38:16,040 Speaker 1: you in here fifteen minutes ago. That was my reaction. 707 00:38:16,400 --> 00:38:18,480 Speaker 1: She called me and she said, I fell in love 708 00:38:18,520 --> 00:38:22,040 Speaker 1: with Diego in Guatemala and I'm going to bring him home. 709 00:38:23,040 --> 00:38:27,040 Speaker 1: And I said, are you crazy, I'm twenty seven years 710 00:38:27,080 --> 00:38:31,560 Speaker 1: old to be your kid? Yes, And she said no, no, no, no, 711 00:38:31,680 --> 00:38:34,040 Speaker 1: just go to the house and go look at the 712 00:38:34,080 --> 00:38:38,640 Speaker 1: photo on the counter. And so I was like, I 713 00:38:39,520 --> 00:38:44,279 Speaker 1: was just why. I just felt that I was like, 714 00:38:44,560 --> 00:38:47,799 Speaker 1: you already raised me? Are you? Were? You an only 715 00:38:47,920 --> 00:38:51,200 Speaker 1: child of two older half sisters. But so we have 716 00:38:51,280 --> 00:38:56,200 Speaker 1: different moms, so I'm her only biological child. So I 717 00:38:56,280 --> 00:38:59,640 Speaker 1: was like, why don't you just go travel? Like, go travel? 718 00:39:00,320 --> 00:39:06,400 Speaker 1: Don't you want to be free? And look what happened? Diego? 719 00:39:06,440 --> 00:39:09,000 Speaker 1: Now I'm so close. I finally went over to the 720 00:39:09,040 --> 00:39:11,000 Speaker 1: house and looked on the counter at that picture and 721 00:39:11,040 --> 00:39:14,640 Speaker 1: I was like, oh, it's so cute, such a sad 722 00:39:14,719 --> 00:39:18,040 Speaker 1: ending if you're like and I never spoke to I 723 00:39:18,200 --> 00:39:20,359 Speaker 1: love that so much. We have so many more things 724 00:39:20,440 --> 00:39:22,399 Speaker 1: we need to get into, but unfortunately have to take 725 00:39:22,400 --> 00:39:32,360 Speaker 1: a little break. So I'm excited. We have a guest 726 00:39:32,440 --> 00:39:35,279 Speaker 1: coming on in a second. Her name's Michelle, and she 727 00:39:35,440 --> 00:39:38,239 Speaker 1: also froze her eggs, but she got pregnant with a 728 00:39:38,280 --> 00:39:41,680 Speaker 1: sperm donor, which reminds me of a story from when 729 00:39:41,719 --> 00:39:44,279 Speaker 1: I was seventeen, eighteen years old and I came to 730 00:39:44,400 --> 00:39:47,760 Speaker 1: Los Angeles, which is so crazy considering all the things 731 00:39:47,800 --> 00:39:50,440 Speaker 1: that you know, ended up happening with me trying to 732 00:39:50,480 --> 00:39:53,640 Speaker 1: get pregnant and whatnot. But I was like super broke. 733 00:39:53,680 --> 00:39:56,520 Speaker 1: I worked in the marrim at Cia and with a roommate, 734 00:39:56,560 --> 00:39:58,480 Speaker 1: we lived in a studio apartment. You know, I was 735 00:39:58,520 --> 00:40:00,480 Speaker 1: also a hostess. And I was like, really, just like, 736 00:40:00,719 --> 00:40:02,520 Speaker 1: we barely have enough money to get the pink dout 737 00:40:02,520 --> 00:40:07,440 Speaker 1: we're ordering, so we were like a desperation central. And 738 00:40:07,560 --> 00:40:10,080 Speaker 1: I pulled open like I can't remember, like I was 739 00:40:10,080 --> 00:40:12,480 Speaker 1: looking at my boss is like Hollywood reporter or whatever 740 00:40:12,520 --> 00:40:15,520 Speaker 1: it was, and I saw that somebody was wanting to 741 00:40:15,560 --> 00:40:17,319 Speaker 1: harvest somebody's eggs and they were going to pay ten 742 00:40:17,360 --> 00:40:20,720 Speaker 1: thousand dollars for it. And I was like, I didn't 743 00:40:20,719 --> 00:40:22,640 Speaker 1: talk to anybody about because I knew I was gonna 744 00:40:22,640 --> 00:40:24,480 Speaker 1: get judge. But I'm like, that could be a good thing. 745 00:40:24,600 --> 00:40:27,720 Speaker 1: Ten thousand dollars to me. Ten thousand dollars. People assume 746 00:40:27,760 --> 00:40:29,360 Speaker 1: when they think about me that like I had a 747 00:40:29,400 --> 00:40:31,080 Speaker 1: trust fund, I had all this money. I didn't. I 748 00:40:31,120 --> 00:40:33,839 Speaker 1: was freaking broke. As a joke, like I didn't even 749 00:40:33,840 --> 00:40:37,440 Speaker 1: have a credit card, Like it was a situation. Um. 750 00:40:37,600 --> 00:40:39,359 Speaker 1: So I was like, you know what, I think I 751 00:40:39,360 --> 00:40:41,920 Speaker 1: could do this. So I called the number on the 752 00:40:41,960 --> 00:40:45,080 Speaker 1: thing and I'm like, hi, um, I was just curious 753 00:40:45,120 --> 00:40:47,720 Speaker 1: that I saw something. I didn't say my name, thank god, 754 00:40:48,520 --> 00:40:51,440 Speaker 1: but I was like, I saw that you're wanting to 755 00:40:51,480 --> 00:40:53,479 Speaker 1: pay somebody for their eggs. You know, I wasn't thinking 756 00:40:53,480 --> 00:40:55,759 Speaker 1: of the repercussion anything. You know, you're just a dumb kid. 757 00:40:56,320 --> 00:40:59,399 Speaker 1: And the person's like, great, I just have a couple 758 00:40:59,440 --> 00:41:00,920 Speaker 1: of questions for you. Do you have blue you know 759 00:41:00,960 --> 00:41:03,120 Speaker 1: we pay extra for certain things. Do you have blue eyes? 760 00:41:03,160 --> 00:41:05,280 Speaker 1: And like I have blue eyes? And he's like great, 761 00:41:05,560 --> 00:41:07,680 Speaker 1: And then they asked a couple of other questions, you know, 762 00:41:07,719 --> 00:41:09,839 Speaker 1: like a bah blah blah blah blah blah. And then 763 00:41:10,080 --> 00:41:11,880 Speaker 1: everything's going well and he's like, I think we should 764 00:41:11,880 --> 00:41:14,000 Speaker 1: set a meeting. Oh one last question, where'd you go 765 00:41:14,040 --> 00:41:18,799 Speaker 1: to college? And I go I didn't And he goes, oh, well, 766 00:41:18,840 --> 00:41:24,399 Speaker 1: actually you're no longer in contention? What what I was like? 767 00:41:25,000 --> 00:41:26,920 Speaker 1: I remember I looked at my roommate and I'm like, 768 00:41:27,120 --> 00:41:29,319 Speaker 1: they don't even want me, and they're not gonna want 769 00:41:29,360 --> 00:41:32,160 Speaker 1: you either because you didn't go to college either. So 770 00:41:35,600 --> 00:41:37,640 Speaker 1: then I actually talked to my mom and dad about 771 00:41:37,680 --> 00:41:39,920 Speaker 1: it and they were like, day, what are you thinking 772 00:41:41,280 --> 00:41:44,319 Speaker 1: like that? What have you lost your mind? I was like, 773 00:41:45,360 --> 00:41:46,960 Speaker 1: maybe a good thing. I brought it up to you 774 00:41:47,040 --> 00:41:54,799 Speaker 1: guys before I found the next at I was like, no, 775 00:41:54,880 --> 00:41:56,480 Speaker 1: they would have been like laughing at me. If I 776 00:41:56,520 --> 00:41:58,239 Speaker 1: was like, but can I have some money? They'd be 777 00:41:58,280 --> 00:42:02,600 Speaker 1: like go kick rocks, get a third job. Um, but yeah, 778 00:42:02,640 --> 00:42:05,600 Speaker 1: that was my story. But anyways, Michelle, I'm excited to 779 00:42:05,600 --> 00:42:10,200 Speaker 1: hear about yours. And you are glowing, beautiful, pregnant twenty 780 00:42:10,239 --> 00:42:14,239 Speaker 1: eight weeks. It's the first week of my um of 781 00:42:14,360 --> 00:42:16,840 Speaker 1: my third try mystery. Wow, it's a trip, like it 782 00:42:17,000 --> 00:42:19,680 Speaker 1: just popped out. It's a little boy, a little boy. 783 00:42:20,080 --> 00:42:21,640 Speaker 1: Do you have a name? Pecked? You don't have to 784 00:42:21,640 --> 00:42:24,960 Speaker 1: tell yet. I mean, like my friend's son wants me 785 00:42:25,000 --> 00:42:30,680 Speaker 1: to name him Thelonias. I like that. So tell us 786 00:42:30,680 --> 00:42:32,880 Speaker 1: a little bit about your story, like and also we 787 00:42:32,920 --> 00:42:34,919 Speaker 1: have to ask all those annoying questions like how old 788 00:42:35,000 --> 00:42:37,880 Speaker 1: you are and all those types of things. Okay, okay, 789 00:42:37,960 --> 00:42:41,759 Speaker 1: so give it to us. Okay. Um, we'll maybe tell 790 00:42:41,800 --> 00:42:43,400 Speaker 1: us how old you are and then what led you 791 00:42:43,440 --> 00:42:49,000 Speaker 1: to this? Okay, I'm forty six, no way, And it's 792 00:42:49,080 --> 00:42:51,200 Speaker 1: it's so weird because I don't think about age. But 793 00:42:51,880 --> 00:42:54,680 Speaker 1: I froze my eggs in eleven and so how were 794 00:42:54,719 --> 00:42:58,480 Speaker 1: you in I'm very bad and go to college. Um, 795 00:42:59,239 --> 00:43:05,600 Speaker 1: that would be thirties seven. And I did it because 796 00:43:06,520 --> 00:43:08,680 Speaker 1: I had a little store up in San Francisco and 797 00:43:08,719 --> 00:43:11,200 Speaker 1: it was the recession it was really intense period in time, 798 00:43:11,239 --> 00:43:14,360 Speaker 1: and I ended up getting diagnosed with cancer and it 799 00:43:14,400 --> 00:43:16,720 Speaker 1: was the first thing I thought of was to freeze 800 00:43:16,719 --> 00:43:21,280 Speaker 1: my eggs and UM, but it wasn't something that they suggested. 801 00:43:21,320 --> 00:43:23,560 Speaker 1: It is like immediately I was like, Okay, this is 802 00:43:23,600 --> 00:43:26,799 Speaker 1: going to be intense this year, and on top of it, 803 00:43:26,840 --> 00:43:30,480 Speaker 1: I don't want to potentially be um sterile from this. 804 00:43:31,360 --> 00:43:34,880 Speaker 1: And so I ended up freezing my eggs and and 805 00:43:34,880 --> 00:43:36,839 Speaker 1: then I went through like cancer treatment up in San 806 00:43:36,840 --> 00:43:42,080 Speaker 1: Francisco at ECSF and UM. And then it circled around 807 00:43:42,120 --> 00:43:46,080 Speaker 1: where last year was forty five and I was like 808 00:43:46,200 --> 00:43:48,279 Speaker 1: dating a guy that was a total mess, and I 809 00:43:48,320 --> 00:43:50,080 Speaker 1: was like I don't have time for this, Like what 810 00:43:50,120 --> 00:43:52,000 Speaker 1: am I doing here? Like I just I can't be 811 00:43:52,080 --> 00:43:54,000 Speaker 1: with like a forty five year old baby, you know, 812 00:43:54,080 --> 00:43:57,440 Speaker 1: Like I don't want a forty five yeld baby. And 813 00:43:57,520 --> 00:43:59,759 Speaker 1: I got out of that night, but this stress, like 814 00:43:59,800 --> 00:44:02,200 Speaker 1: I didn't realize I wanted a kid so badly, Like 815 00:44:02,280 --> 00:44:05,080 Speaker 1: I did it. Obviously I did it froze my eggs, 816 00:44:04,880 --> 00:44:08,359 Speaker 1: so it's important to me. But I kept thinking I'd 817 00:44:08,360 --> 00:44:12,359 Speaker 1: meet the right person and then I UM. Last year, 818 00:44:12,960 --> 00:44:15,359 Speaker 1: I was talking to a friend who's adopted a girl, 819 00:44:15,480 --> 00:44:18,239 Speaker 1: a little baby girl, and she has three boys. And 820 00:44:18,280 --> 00:44:20,520 Speaker 1: she's like, Hommy, that's my last name, and she's like, 821 00:44:20,640 --> 00:44:22,719 Speaker 1: just have a baby and then you can meet the guy. 822 00:44:23,719 --> 00:44:27,080 Speaker 1: And then just through a series of of things. That 823 00:44:27,160 --> 00:44:29,520 Speaker 1: month when she said that came up, I had to 824 00:44:29,560 --> 00:44:31,440 Speaker 1: pay my storage for you for my eggs. So I 825 00:44:31,440 --> 00:44:34,600 Speaker 1: went to go see my doctor in San Francisco, who 826 00:44:34,640 --> 00:44:36,920 Speaker 1: froze them, and he like when I walked in, he 827 00:44:37,280 --> 00:44:41,240 Speaker 1: started crying and he's like, Michelle, I love seeing patients 828 00:44:41,239 --> 00:44:44,319 Speaker 1: like you. It's amazing you're here. Um. I love him. 829 00:44:44,360 --> 00:44:48,239 Speaker 1: His name's Mitchell Rosen in San Francisco. He's incredible. The 830 00:44:48,320 --> 00:44:50,240 Speaker 1: next thing I knew, I was just on the journey 831 00:44:50,280 --> 00:44:54,440 Speaker 1: of doing IVF and like it's so cool because like 832 00:44:54,480 --> 00:44:56,560 Speaker 1: everything kind of panned out like where I had like 833 00:44:57,040 --> 00:44:59,319 Speaker 1: cash flow come last year, like things have just been 834 00:44:59,320 --> 00:45:04,200 Speaker 1: like magically like unfolding to get to this place. And 835 00:45:04,239 --> 00:45:06,759 Speaker 1: it worked. So in April seventeenth this year, I had 836 00:45:07,360 --> 00:45:11,520 Speaker 1: I did three transfers. I found sperm last year. Okay, 837 00:45:11,840 --> 00:45:13,919 Speaker 1: I have to stop you. Yes, that was a whole 838 00:45:13,920 --> 00:45:17,440 Speaker 1: other thing where I was like, I mean, did he 839 00:45:17,480 --> 00:45:22,120 Speaker 1: go to college? He did? That was a PSI student, 840 00:45:22,160 --> 00:45:24,279 Speaker 1: which is kind of funny. So I feel like he's 841 00:45:24,280 --> 00:45:27,560 Speaker 1: in l a somewhere, but he's UM and he The 842 00:45:27,640 --> 00:45:29,400 Speaker 1: funny thing is like did you see it? So you 843 00:45:29,560 --> 00:45:30,959 Speaker 1: know what he looks like. I know what he looks 844 00:45:30,960 --> 00:45:34,920 Speaker 1: like as a child. Oh, most of them, it's literally 845 00:45:34,920 --> 00:45:37,279 Speaker 1: like Tinder. It's like it's like but you never have 846 00:45:37,320 --> 00:45:41,880 Speaker 1: to go in it, like the dream come true. There's 847 00:45:41,920 --> 00:45:44,279 Speaker 1: like it's a website. Well, like there's a few. So 848 00:45:44,320 --> 00:45:48,959 Speaker 1: there's one UM smaller sperm bank in the East Bay 849 00:45:49,000 --> 00:45:51,960 Speaker 1: that's like it was started by lesbian couples, like I 850 00:45:52,000 --> 00:45:54,239 Speaker 1: don't know, fifteen years ago and right now I can't 851 00:45:54,239 --> 00:45:56,600 Speaker 1: remember the name of it. So I looked at that 852 00:45:56,680 --> 00:45:58,520 Speaker 1: one because I know that they really go into like 853 00:45:58,600 --> 00:46:01,960 Speaker 1: looking for good character of sperm donors. And then I 854 00:46:02,040 --> 00:46:05,879 Speaker 1: ended up finding my sperm at California Cryobank, which they 855 00:46:05,920 --> 00:46:09,960 Speaker 1: have a huge um how much does it cost to 856 00:46:10,040 --> 00:46:12,719 Speaker 1: get a sperm? So a vial of sperm is a 857 00:46:12,760 --> 00:46:18,239 Speaker 1: thousand dollars? That is not that now and it's and 858 00:46:18,320 --> 00:46:21,000 Speaker 1: how much how much does a vial? That I know, 859 00:46:22,920 --> 00:46:26,160 Speaker 1: how much does a vial? How far does the vial go? 860 00:46:26,239 --> 00:46:28,799 Speaker 1: Did a vile last you all through transfers. Yeah, so 861 00:46:28,960 --> 00:46:31,319 Speaker 1: my doctor worked with me because usually they asked you 862 00:46:31,360 --> 00:46:35,560 Speaker 1: to um to like get to sper sperm vials, and 863 00:46:35,600 --> 00:46:37,399 Speaker 1: I just bought one and I sent it up there 864 00:46:37,440 --> 00:46:38,960 Speaker 1: to him, like they have to. You have to pay 865 00:46:39,000 --> 00:46:41,360 Speaker 1: extra to pay to have it frozen sent up like 866 00:46:41,520 --> 00:46:43,440 Speaker 1: through FedEx or whatever. How long did it take you 867 00:46:43,480 --> 00:46:45,719 Speaker 1: to pick X? Wait? Wait? How long did it take 868 00:46:45,760 --> 00:46:47,560 Speaker 1: you to pick him? It took me a few weeks 869 00:46:47,600 --> 00:46:49,759 Speaker 1: because it's overwhelming. So I sat down and looked. I 870 00:46:49,800 --> 00:46:51,640 Speaker 1: was like whoa, Like this is a lot. And then 871 00:46:51,719 --> 00:46:54,160 Speaker 1: I had to go back and regroup and look at 872 00:46:54,200 --> 00:46:57,000 Speaker 1: it like a month later, and I ended up buying 873 00:46:57,160 --> 00:47:00,520 Speaker 1: his sperm in September. But I went through a process 874 00:47:00,560 --> 00:47:03,160 Speaker 1: of like looking there were some donors that had their 875 00:47:03,200 --> 00:47:05,480 Speaker 1: adult photos, and there's like this one really cute guy 876 00:47:05,520 --> 00:47:09,000 Speaker 1: that like had a master's and like production and like 877 00:47:09,040 --> 00:47:12,000 Speaker 1: what seemed like very like creative, like served hiked and 878 00:47:12,040 --> 00:47:14,440 Speaker 1: I was like, oh, I could date this guy. And 879 00:47:14,480 --> 00:47:17,959 Speaker 1: then I heard his interview with like the like someone 880 00:47:18,000 --> 00:47:19,520 Speaker 1: at the sperm bank and he had a chip on 881 00:47:19,560 --> 00:47:21,800 Speaker 1: his shoulder, and I was like, if I'm going to 882 00:47:21,880 --> 00:47:23,680 Speaker 1: be a single mom, like I really want like someone 883 00:47:23,719 --> 00:47:28,080 Speaker 1: that's like happy joy, you know, doesn't stay on there, 884 00:47:28,280 --> 00:47:31,640 Speaker 1: like if you could ever reach out to the sperm donor. 885 00:47:32,080 --> 00:47:33,799 Speaker 1: So that's the other thing that helps. So like there's 886 00:47:33,840 --> 00:47:36,279 Speaker 1: like literally like a thousand donors. So I like I 887 00:47:36,320 --> 00:47:39,719 Speaker 1: picked filters that like narrowed down my start. So one 888 00:47:39,719 --> 00:47:41,880 Speaker 1: of them was I decided to do an open downer 889 00:47:42,000 --> 00:47:43,840 Speaker 1: so that if my baby wants to reach out to 890 00:47:43,840 --> 00:47:46,600 Speaker 1: the dad, he could do. Now, I love your your 891 00:47:46,640 --> 00:47:51,280 Speaker 1: sperm donor, he said, yeah, yeah, and almost so I won't. 892 00:47:51,320 --> 00:47:53,200 Speaker 1: I don't know who he is, and we won't now 893 00:47:53,280 --> 00:47:56,200 Speaker 1: until my baby is eighteen if my baby wants to 894 00:47:57,120 --> 00:47:58,840 Speaker 1: reach out to him. But at least it's like another 895 00:47:58,920 --> 00:48:02,160 Speaker 1: family mamber, your soul mate. Who knows, I could wait 896 00:48:02,200 --> 00:48:08,640 Speaker 1: eighteen years. I've been sing all this long. Wow, I 897 00:48:08,680 --> 00:48:11,080 Speaker 1: think that's so amazing that you can pick that, because 898 00:48:11,080 --> 00:48:13,200 Speaker 1: that's what I was thinking, Like, when you are telling 899 00:48:13,239 --> 00:48:16,160 Speaker 1: your son, it's so nice to be able to give 900 00:48:16,200 --> 00:48:19,480 Speaker 1: them that option. Right when do you think you'll tell 901 00:48:19,520 --> 00:48:22,080 Speaker 1: your son? I feel like right away, it's like why, 902 00:48:23,040 --> 00:48:24,759 Speaker 1: I mean, I'm sure it's going to come up. I'm 903 00:48:24,800 --> 00:48:27,719 Speaker 1: just kind of trusting the journey on that. I mean, 904 00:48:27,760 --> 00:48:32,160 Speaker 1: this is so incredible. And then so you send it, 905 00:48:32,360 --> 00:48:35,680 Speaker 1: you send it, you fed exit, you pay baxtra f 906 00:48:36,320 --> 00:48:39,440 Speaker 1: and then so this is the doctor, so I he 907 00:48:39,480 --> 00:48:41,839 Speaker 1: worked with me on my one sperm vile because I'm 908 00:48:41,840 --> 00:48:43,480 Speaker 1: doing this sellout. So it's like it's still a lot 909 00:48:43,520 --> 00:48:46,640 Speaker 1: of money. You know, how much did you spend? I 910 00:48:46,640 --> 00:48:49,520 Speaker 1: think I did a spreadsheet almost like fell over. It 911 00:48:49,560 --> 00:48:52,360 Speaker 1: was mind's less probably than a lot of people. But 912 00:48:52,400 --> 00:48:57,160 Speaker 1: I spent about grand Yeah. Do you think you would 913 00:48:57,160 --> 00:48:58,959 Speaker 1: ever do it again? I don't know. It depends because 914 00:48:59,000 --> 00:49:01,000 Speaker 1: now I still have half of the sperm up north, 915 00:49:01,040 --> 00:49:03,000 Speaker 1: and I have eleven eggs left because I had a 916 00:49:03,080 --> 00:49:06,600 Speaker 1: huge fertility. Like when when they harvested my eggs, they 917 00:49:06,600 --> 00:49:10,160 Speaker 1: took out twenty three And did you do PGF before? 918 00:49:10,320 --> 00:49:12,920 Speaker 1: You didn't? And then for your you said you did 919 00:49:12,920 --> 00:49:15,200 Speaker 1: three transfers. So for your first two, did you get 920 00:49:15,239 --> 00:49:18,320 Speaker 1: pregnant or um? I think I had like a chemical 921 00:49:18,360 --> 00:49:22,640 Speaker 1: predicate and then the second one didn't work. How what 922 00:49:22,800 --> 00:49:25,040 Speaker 1: was your emotional state during that time? Now that I'm 923 00:49:25,040 --> 00:49:26,920 Speaker 1: out of it and I'm pregnant, like I feel so 924 00:49:27,000 --> 00:49:29,600 Speaker 1: much more. It took a few weeks into pregnancy, like 925 00:49:29,760 --> 00:49:32,400 Speaker 1: maybe two months, but like I'm so much more stable, 926 00:49:32,480 --> 00:49:34,240 Speaker 1: Like I don't. I don't think I realized like how 927 00:49:35,320 --> 00:49:38,240 Speaker 1: emotional I was during the IVF process, because as hormones 928 00:49:38,239 --> 00:49:40,759 Speaker 1: are intense, the hormones are intense. I almost felt like 929 00:49:40,800 --> 00:49:43,439 Speaker 1: I shut down the world around me because I didn't 930 00:49:43,480 --> 00:49:47,200 Speaker 1: want anybody to know the level of how control I 931 00:49:47,280 --> 00:49:49,440 Speaker 1: was totally that. I feel like it's the pill, like 932 00:49:49,640 --> 00:49:51,480 Speaker 1: during the process. You have to take the pill when 933 00:49:51,520 --> 00:49:53,400 Speaker 1: you start a new cycle, and you're on it for 934 00:49:53,440 --> 00:49:55,919 Speaker 1: like a month or so, and then you start doing 935 00:49:56,000 --> 00:49:58,319 Speaker 1: injections or whatever. At least for me, because I wasn't 936 00:49:58,360 --> 00:50:02,840 Speaker 1: taking out eggs each round already at them, the pill 937 00:50:03,120 --> 00:50:06,680 Speaker 1: was crazy, Like I just feel like I got for me, 938 00:50:06,760 --> 00:50:09,359 Speaker 1: it was like my thing was like depression. That's how 939 00:50:09,400 --> 00:50:12,640 Speaker 1: I was as well. That turned really manifested into anxiety. 940 00:50:13,480 --> 00:50:16,400 Speaker 1: I mean, it's just it's so crazy the things that 941 00:50:16,440 --> 00:50:19,720 Speaker 1: we do to ourselves over things that we cannot control. 942 00:50:20,960 --> 00:50:23,800 Speaker 1: On that note, we have Julia Sadler on the line, 943 00:50:24,080 --> 00:50:28,920 Speaker 1: and she wrote a book called Pray Big Things, and 944 00:50:29,480 --> 00:50:33,120 Speaker 1: she is a mom to triplets who struggled with infertility, 945 00:50:33,200 --> 00:50:35,680 Speaker 1: and so I think it would be really interesting to 946 00:50:35,719 --> 00:50:47,520 Speaker 1: get her perspective on all of this all right. Here 947 00:50:47,640 --> 00:50:50,120 Speaker 1: we are back, and I think Julia Sadler is on 948 00:50:50,160 --> 00:50:57,480 Speaker 1: the line. Hello, Julia, Hi, how are you going. I'm great, 949 00:50:57,560 --> 00:51:00,279 Speaker 1: Thanks for coming on with us. We really appreciate for 950 00:51:00,320 --> 00:51:03,160 Speaker 1: having me so nice. I thank you for having me. 951 00:51:03,520 --> 00:51:05,560 Speaker 1: I was wondering if you could share a little bit 952 00:51:05,600 --> 00:51:08,440 Speaker 1: about your story with us. So many people that listen 953 00:51:09,000 --> 00:51:12,440 Speaker 1: to the podcast, you know, one of their main questions 954 00:51:12,560 --> 00:51:16,280 Speaker 1: was like, how you know, how do you stay strong 955 00:51:16,440 --> 00:51:19,680 Speaker 1: throughout having multiple miscarriages and things like that. So, I mean, 956 00:51:19,719 --> 00:51:24,000 Speaker 1: I think your story will truly resonate and um, so 957 00:51:24,200 --> 00:51:28,160 Speaker 1: I would. I would love to hear from you. Okay, awesome, Yeah, 958 00:51:28,400 --> 00:51:31,719 Speaker 1: I mean, I think it was so interesting to experience 959 00:51:31,960 --> 00:51:37,480 Speaker 1: miscarriages after becoming a professional counselor because I knew, like 960 00:51:37,560 --> 00:51:40,680 Speaker 1: I knew it was important to stay close to your spouse, 961 00:51:40,920 --> 00:51:43,480 Speaker 1: and I knew it was important the process of feelings. 962 00:51:43,800 --> 00:51:47,000 Speaker 1: But it's just totally different knowing what you're supposed to 963 00:51:47,080 --> 00:51:51,120 Speaker 1: do and then actually experiencing it. And I know that 964 00:51:51,200 --> 00:51:54,440 Speaker 1: you're familiar with that pain and that struggle. But my 965 00:51:54,520 --> 00:51:57,720 Speaker 1: husband and I we were we were junior high sweethearts 966 00:51:57,760 --> 00:52:01,040 Speaker 1: and we've been together for a long time. And we 967 00:52:01,200 --> 00:52:03,799 Speaker 1: just never had any reason to think there was any 968 00:52:03,880 --> 00:52:07,200 Speaker 1: problem getting pregnant. It was just something we weren't ready 969 00:52:07,239 --> 00:52:10,319 Speaker 1: to do. And so at seven, when we've been married 970 00:52:10,320 --> 00:52:14,200 Speaker 1: about seven years, we decided it was time, and I 971 00:52:14,280 --> 00:52:18,479 Speaker 1: got pregnant super easily, and I remember just thinking, wow, 972 00:52:18,719 --> 00:52:23,000 Speaker 1: like that wasn't too hard. And just a few weeks 973 00:52:23,080 --> 00:52:27,200 Speaker 1: later and up losing that first child, and we were 974 00:52:27,360 --> 00:52:31,160 Speaker 1: very sad, we're very heartbroken about it. That it was 975 00:52:31,239 --> 00:52:33,879 Speaker 1: so interesting how many people reached out to us since 976 00:52:33,920 --> 00:52:37,120 Speaker 1: that they had had the same experience. And so while 977 00:52:37,160 --> 00:52:40,160 Speaker 1: we were we were sad, but we weren't just completely 978 00:52:40,200 --> 00:52:43,040 Speaker 1: in despair, and since it seemed like it was something 979 00:52:43,080 --> 00:52:46,520 Speaker 1: a lot of people had gone through. But then we 980 00:52:46,600 --> 00:52:50,400 Speaker 1: got pregnant again unless that child, and then a months 981 00:52:50,480 --> 00:52:53,840 Speaker 1: later get pregnant again, and so three most carriages in 982 00:52:54,040 --> 00:52:58,480 Speaker 1: less than six months. Did seem like something was wrong. Um, 983 00:52:58,960 --> 00:53:02,920 Speaker 1: And but that was a very difficult time hellow marriage, 984 00:53:03,160 --> 00:53:07,680 Speaker 1: And so we decided we weren't gonna pray super specifically. 985 00:53:07,880 --> 00:53:11,160 Speaker 1: And I'd always people think it's crazy. I had always 986 00:53:11,200 --> 00:53:14,360 Speaker 1: wanted multiples, That's something I'd always desired, And so we 987 00:53:14,440 --> 00:53:17,200 Speaker 1: just decided we weren't going to be embarrassed God for 988 00:53:17,280 --> 00:53:21,319 Speaker 1: anything that we prayed for multiples, three children, and then 989 00:53:21,320 --> 00:53:25,040 Speaker 1: we went and saw our fertility doctor who and did 990 00:53:25,120 --> 00:53:31,040 Speaker 1: put me on certain medication and said, yeah, yeah, make 991 00:53:31,120 --> 00:53:35,480 Speaker 1: you crazy. Um it any super emotional. And we were 992 00:53:35,520 --> 00:53:38,440 Speaker 1: at this retreat that week and I was like, I 993 00:53:38,480 --> 00:53:40,680 Speaker 1: just need to not talk to because I was like 994 00:53:40,840 --> 00:53:45,239 Speaker 1: prying during Like I mean, it wasn't even that of 995 00:53:45,360 --> 00:53:47,520 Speaker 1: a story, and I was just like, oh my gosh, 996 00:53:47,600 --> 00:53:50,200 Speaker 1: that's the best thing I've ever heard. I was like, Ryan, 997 00:53:50,280 --> 00:53:52,719 Speaker 1: I'm actin crazy, like I can't. I don't need to 998 00:53:52,800 --> 00:53:58,680 Speaker 1: hear talking to anybody. Um. Yeah. And so we were 999 00:53:58,719 --> 00:54:01,600 Speaker 1: really open in us when so many people reached out 1000 00:54:01,600 --> 00:54:03,600 Speaker 1: and said they had had similar things. But yes, when 1001 00:54:03,600 --> 00:54:06,440 Speaker 1: people tell me they're taking clomad, I'm like, okay, nothing 1002 00:54:06,560 --> 00:54:12,120 Speaker 1: counts right now. So even creating anything yourself says or 1003 00:54:12,160 --> 00:54:15,799 Speaker 1: your friends, just maybe go into hanging out at home 1004 00:54:15,840 --> 00:54:19,120 Speaker 1: for a while. But we we did. We ended up 1005 00:54:19,120 --> 00:54:24,640 Speaker 1: conceiving triplets and it was just incredible, miraculous and um, 1006 00:54:25,200 --> 00:54:29,319 Speaker 1: very very you know, difficult road to get there, but 1007 00:54:29,560 --> 00:54:32,600 Speaker 1: we're very thankful for our miracle babies, which were the 1008 00:54:32,640 --> 00:54:37,600 Speaker 1: results of praying and fertility treatments. So after your three miscarriages, 1009 00:54:37,680 --> 00:54:40,279 Speaker 1: that is that when you started the clomad or were 1010 00:54:40,280 --> 00:54:44,719 Speaker 1: you on it throughout the entire time. No, so our 1011 00:54:44,800 --> 00:54:47,799 Speaker 1: doctors told them that you don't really seek medical help 1012 00:54:47,840 --> 00:54:50,759 Speaker 1: and tell three miscarriages, but seems like a lot to 1013 00:54:50,800 --> 00:54:54,919 Speaker 1: go through before you took out some help. But now 1014 00:54:54,920 --> 00:54:58,640 Speaker 1: it wasn't until afterwards and that I went on clomad 1015 00:54:58,760 --> 00:55:03,520 Speaker 1: and then some few shots that kind of helped with ovulation. Yeah, 1016 00:55:03,560 --> 00:55:06,640 Speaker 1: I did those as well. Um, did you what did 1017 00:55:06,640 --> 00:55:09,879 Speaker 1: you like I was talking about when I was either 1018 00:55:10,000 --> 00:55:12,320 Speaker 1: having a mischaracter, if I had a chemical pregnancy, or 1019 00:55:12,360 --> 00:55:16,680 Speaker 1: if I just wasn't actually getting pregnant. I just you said, 1020 00:55:16,719 --> 00:55:19,040 Speaker 1: you know, an important thing is to really communicate with 1021 00:55:19,040 --> 00:55:22,240 Speaker 1: your spouse. I was not doing that. I was really 1022 00:55:22,480 --> 00:55:25,520 Speaker 1: deep down inside of myself, like trying to show my 1023 00:55:25,560 --> 00:55:30,959 Speaker 1: emotions to anybody. Um, how how did you handle it? Yeah? 1024 00:55:31,000 --> 00:55:34,200 Speaker 1: So the first one, Um, I really was like, Okay, 1025 00:55:34,239 --> 00:55:37,040 Speaker 1: this is a test, this is a test of our replationships, 1026 00:55:37,120 --> 00:55:40,360 Speaker 1: Like I just need it. I need to do practice 1027 00:55:40,360 --> 00:55:41,960 Speaker 1: what our breach. I need to do what I know 1028 00:55:42,000 --> 00:55:44,040 Speaker 1: I'm supposed to do. And so the first thing, I 1029 00:55:44,040 --> 00:55:47,160 Speaker 1: feel like I was like, I'm sposed. Degree, I let 1030 00:55:47,200 --> 00:55:50,000 Speaker 1: myself gree that was honest with Ryan. But then the 1031 00:55:50,080 --> 00:55:53,719 Speaker 1: second one, I definitely was more discouraged afterwards, and it 1032 00:55:53,840 --> 00:55:58,000 Speaker 1: was very tempting to withdraw and kind of be more isolated. 1033 00:55:58,080 --> 00:56:01,080 Speaker 1: I definitely stopped going to baby shower. I had thirteen 1034 00:56:01,160 --> 00:56:04,440 Speaker 1: pregnant friends that years, I know, like Instagram friends, like 1035 00:56:04,640 --> 00:56:08,480 Speaker 1: real friends, and it was just like babies were everywhere. 1036 00:56:09,040 --> 00:56:11,719 Speaker 1: And so there's been things. I mean, I'm not at 1037 00:56:11,760 --> 00:56:15,640 Speaker 1: all would never say we did things perfectly. It was 1038 00:56:15,680 --> 00:56:19,960 Speaker 1: a very big struggle, but there are just two things. 1039 00:56:20,239 --> 00:56:23,760 Speaker 1: The idea that honesty creates intimacy, and so being honest 1040 00:56:23,880 --> 00:56:26,680 Speaker 1: with Ryan, I mean I just got out of myself 1041 00:56:26,680 --> 00:56:28,640 Speaker 1: and my friends just about what I was feeling and 1042 00:56:28,680 --> 00:56:32,560 Speaker 1: what I need. And then also just the same we 1043 00:56:32,640 --> 00:56:35,120 Speaker 1: say and therapy you have to feel it to heal it. 1044 00:56:35,440 --> 00:56:39,680 Speaker 1: And so instead of yeah, I just I didn't even 1045 00:56:39,719 --> 00:56:41,520 Speaker 1: come up with that, that was just something we say 1046 00:56:41,560 --> 00:56:44,239 Speaker 1: all the time. And so even though it's uncomfortable to 1047 00:56:44,280 --> 00:56:47,799 Speaker 1: be angry and it's uncomfortable to be sad, and definitely 1048 00:56:47,960 --> 00:56:51,360 Speaker 1: like our culture isn't like, oh, good job for grieving, 1049 00:56:51,760 --> 00:56:55,160 Speaker 1: you know, that's definitely not something celebrated, but just letting 1050 00:56:55,160 --> 00:56:57,560 Speaker 1: yourself feel what you need to feel or else it 1051 00:56:57,640 --> 00:56:59,840 Speaker 1: does come out in other ways, which just in the 1052 00:57:00,040 --> 00:57:04,319 Speaker 1: wow anxiety depression. And so I didn't do that perfectly, 1053 00:57:04,400 --> 00:57:07,680 Speaker 1: but I did challenge myself to let myself feel and 1054 00:57:07,880 --> 00:57:11,200 Speaker 1: whatever that is without judgment. So I have a question, 1055 00:57:11,360 --> 00:57:13,160 Speaker 1: so a lot I'm going to ask you, because you 1056 00:57:13,200 --> 00:57:15,480 Speaker 1: are also a counselor. I have a lot of people 1057 00:57:15,520 --> 00:57:19,760 Speaker 1: that have written in questions in regards to miscarriages. Um, 1058 00:57:19,920 --> 00:57:24,000 Speaker 1: for somebody who maybe doesn't have a relationship with God 1059 00:57:24,080 --> 00:57:27,120 Speaker 1: or doesn't go to church, what are some ways to heal? 1060 00:57:27,200 --> 00:57:30,640 Speaker 1: Like somebody's written in that they've had tens ten miscarriages 1061 00:57:30,720 --> 00:57:35,280 Speaker 1: behind them, you know, how do you not lose hope? Right? 1062 00:57:35,400 --> 00:57:39,520 Speaker 1: And if you're from that from that background, well, and 1063 00:57:39,920 --> 00:57:45,080 Speaker 1: everyone has a purpose and I think that regardless of 1064 00:57:45,120 --> 00:57:49,080 Speaker 1: what your face background is, Um, there's a reason you're here. 1065 00:57:49,840 --> 00:57:53,720 Speaker 1: And it's tempting not to always like to the next thing, 1066 00:57:53,920 --> 00:57:56,520 Speaker 1: like I'll be happy when I get pregnant, or when 1067 00:57:56,560 --> 00:57:59,160 Speaker 1: I get married, or when I work with teenagers a lot. 1068 00:57:59,280 --> 00:58:02,080 Speaker 1: So when I get into that college and they're really 1069 00:58:02,080 --> 00:58:07,480 Speaker 1: figuring out what this time is about and if if 1070 00:58:07,520 --> 00:58:10,280 Speaker 1: the future doesn't have I'm not if the futurist heaven, 1071 00:58:10,360 --> 00:58:12,800 Speaker 1: but if what you want, if you never hit pregnantly, 1072 00:58:12,800 --> 00:58:15,600 Speaker 1: if you don't get married, what can you still find 1073 00:58:15,920 --> 00:58:20,000 Speaker 1: purpose in for your life? And maybe those things will happen, 1074 00:58:20,040 --> 00:58:23,720 Speaker 1: hopefully they do, but that doesn't negate the fact that 1075 00:58:23,760 --> 00:58:25,880 Speaker 1: you have an incredible purpose and there is a plan 1076 00:58:26,000 --> 00:58:29,160 Speaker 1: for your life and searching out what that is good 1077 00:58:29,160 --> 00:58:33,080 Speaker 1: advice and really good advice. And in that same token, 1078 00:58:33,600 --> 00:58:37,320 Speaker 1: you know, oftentimes I've had friends that have miscarried, and 1079 00:58:37,400 --> 00:58:39,680 Speaker 1: even though I have, I still don't know the right 1080 00:58:39,680 --> 00:58:42,520 Speaker 1: words to say, like what do you what advice do 1081 00:58:42,560 --> 00:58:45,120 Speaker 1: you give to somebody, either a spouse or a friend 1082 00:58:45,840 --> 00:58:49,080 Speaker 1: to say to somebody who's having a miscarriage, had to miscara, 1083 00:58:49,200 --> 00:58:52,040 Speaker 1: you know, what is your advice on that. I do 1084 00:58:52,120 --> 00:58:55,560 Speaker 1: not think there's a blanket state membered that I really 1085 00:58:55,680 --> 00:58:59,520 Speaker 1: encourage people going through to tell people what they need 1086 00:59:00,120 --> 00:59:03,680 Speaker 1: because friends and spouses do feel so scared they're going 1087 00:59:03,720 --> 00:59:06,680 Speaker 1: to say the wrong thing, and so I don't I 1088 00:59:06,720 --> 00:59:09,000 Speaker 1: don't know if there's a blanket state remember what to 1089 00:59:09,040 --> 00:59:11,040 Speaker 1: say if you're a spouse or friend. But I think 1090 00:59:11,480 --> 00:59:14,720 Speaker 1: a good principle is just remembering that that person is 1091 00:59:14,760 --> 00:59:18,280 Speaker 1: still who they always were to For me, I'm super extroverted, 1092 00:59:18,520 --> 00:59:20,720 Speaker 1: So my husband knew if I'm just saying I want 1093 00:59:20,720 --> 00:59:24,440 Speaker 1: to stay at home, something's off here. And so remembering 1094 00:59:24,440 --> 00:59:26,680 Speaker 1: that that friend of that spouse is still the same person, 1095 00:59:26,760 --> 00:59:29,600 Speaker 1: shall has the same personality and still needs to be 1096 00:59:29,680 --> 00:59:33,480 Speaker 1: reached out to a ministered to in accordance with the 1097 00:59:33,480 --> 00:59:36,040 Speaker 1: person you've always known. And then how do you handle 1098 00:59:36,080 --> 00:59:40,360 Speaker 1: it if you're pregnant and your friend is having miscarriages? 1099 00:59:41,280 --> 00:59:44,880 Speaker 1: Because I yeah, I remember when I was struggling, I 1100 00:59:44,880 --> 00:59:47,160 Speaker 1: would have you know, like you're saying, with baby showers 1101 00:59:47,240 --> 00:59:49,440 Speaker 1: or any of those things. And it wasn't that I 1102 00:59:49,480 --> 00:59:53,720 Speaker 1: wasn't happy for them, right, But I remember also being 1103 00:59:53,840 --> 00:59:57,240 Speaker 1: like do I need to be here? And so you 1104 00:59:57,240 --> 00:59:59,960 Speaker 1: know how now you know now I am pregnant. So 1105 01:00:00,000 --> 01:00:01,720 Speaker 1: if that were to be the case for me, what 1106 01:00:01,800 --> 01:00:04,640 Speaker 1: do you think the best way to go about it? 1107 01:00:04,680 --> 01:00:07,000 Speaker 1: When a friend is you know, because that happened so much. 1108 01:00:07,040 --> 01:00:09,360 Speaker 1: You often get pregnant in groups and you know, like 1109 01:00:09,440 --> 01:00:12,360 Speaker 1: it happens and the pain is so raw and I 1110 01:00:12,440 --> 01:00:14,320 Speaker 1: don't want to say the wrong and especially when you're 1111 01:00:14,320 --> 01:00:16,360 Speaker 1: the pregnant one, you don't want to say the wrong 1112 01:00:16,400 --> 01:00:20,720 Speaker 1: thing to the person that isn't absolutely yes, So I 1113 01:00:20,840 --> 01:00:25,320 Speaker 1: think being honest is so important. Like my friends that 1114 01:00:25,360 --> 01:00:28,000 Speaker 1: were pregnant while we were struggling, they I mean, they 1115 01:00:28,000 --> 01:00:30,720 Speaker 1: would tell me, like, I'm pregnant. I know this may 1116 01:00:31,040 --> 01:00:33,240 Speaker 1: be hard for you, and we're still praying for you. 1117 01:00:33,320 --> 01:00:36,640 Speaker 1: But I just think putting stuff out there is so 1118 01:00:36,720 --> 01:00:40,000 Speaker 1: much better than hiding. And I found because there are 1119 01:00:40,040 --> 01:00:42,760 Speaker 1: people I kind of obviously got pregnant with triplets, and 1120 01:00:42,800 --> 01:00:45,080 Speaker 1: I had a friend I've been struggling with him for 1121 01:00:45,320 --> 01:00:48,120 Speaker 1: like for years, and I mean I was going to 1122 01:00:48,240 --> 01:00:51,560 Speaker 1: tell home, But what I've found, what I've heard and 1123 01:00:51,680 --> 01:00:55,280 Speaker 1: experiences that people already so isolated, so then if you 1124 01:00:55,320 --> 01:00:59,680 Speaker 1: don't include them, then it's just even more feeling left out. 1125 01:01:00,280 --> 01:01:02,200 Speaker 1: And that's I mean, that's it. I can from other 1126 01:01:02,240 --> 01:01:03,920 Speaker 1: people that they do want to be told, they do 1127 01:01:03,960 --> 01:01:07,000 Speaker 1: want to rejoice with you, and it's that's to them. 1128 01:01:07,040 --> 01:01:09,480 Speaker 1: I mean, it's hard to hear, but it's to us 1129 01:01:09,600 --> 01:01:12,160 Speaker 1: to take care of our own emotions, not us to 1130 01:01:12,240 --> 01:01:14,960 Speaker 1: other people. And so we have to be responsible for 1131 01:01:15,000 --> 01:01:17,919 Speaker 1: doing what we need to do for ourselves. But I've 1132 01:01:17,920 --> 01:01:20,800 Speaker 1: heard people say they they've gotten their feelings art because 1133 01:01:20,840 --> 01:01:24,120 Speaker 1: they haven't been included in that. So I would enclos 1134 01:01:24,200 --> 01:01:27,720 Speaker 1: him to tell their friends and just how they're feeling 1135 01:01:27,800 --> 01:01:30,680 Speaker 1: and that they remember their struggle. I found a lot 1136 01:01:30,720 --> 01:01:33,160 Speaker 1: of people, especially if they struggle with imfertility for years, 1137 01:01:33,200 --> 01:01:36,120 Speaker 1: kind of get forgotten and so it's so important to 1138 01:01:36,200 --> 01:01:38,760 Speaker 1: tell that when you remember and you remember their struggle. 1139 01:01:39,840 --> 01:01:42,560 Speaker 1: Thank you such good advice. And if you guys wanna 1140 01:01:42,960 --> 01:01:47,120 Speaker 1: read Julius book, it's called Pray Big Things. It's amazing 1141 01:01:47,280 --> 01:01:49,880 Speaker 1: and we really appreciate you taking the time to talk 1142 01:01:49,920 --> 01:01:52,360 Speaker 1: with us today. Thank you for having me. I really 1143 01:01:52,400 --> 01:01:55,280 Speaker 1: appreciate it. And you've got three little cutie's. I'm looking 1144 01:01:55,280 --> 01:02:00,080 Speaker 1: at their picture right here. Thank you. All right, going 1145 01:02:00,160 --> 01:02:10,080 Speaker 1: to take a little break. We have so many questions 1146 01:02:10,080 --> 01:02:12,560 Speaker 1: from our listeners. I printed them all out of like 1147 01:02:12,640 --> 01:02:14,280 Speaker 1: pages and pages, so I'm gonna try to get there 1148 01:02:14,320 --> 01:02:16,720 Speaker 1: as many as possible. So we're gonna bring on Dr 1149 01:02:16,840 --> 01:02:19,360 Speaker 1: Katherine Green. She's a board certified O B, g U, 1150 01:02:19,400 --> 01:02:25,760 Speaker 1: I N and reproductive and trochnologist. Dr Green. Yeah, Hi, Hi, 1151 01:02:26,440 --> 01:02:30,280 Speaker 1: how are you? How are you good? We're all I 1152 01:02:30,280 --> 01:02:34,840 Speaker 1: amped up. We have so many questions oh perfect, Um, 1153 01:02:34,920 --> 01:02:38,480 Speaker 1: do you mind if I just start rapid fire? Sure? No, 1154 01:02:38,640 --> 01:02:41,000 Speaker 1: that's not problem at all. That sounds good. Okay great. 1155 01:02:41,200 --> 01:02:43,880 Speaker 1: First main question that a lot of people have asked 1156 01:02:43,960 --> 01:02:47,120 Speaker 1: is what age should you freeze your eggs by? Is 1157 01:02:47,120 --> 01:02:51,040 Speaker 1: there an age it's too late? Sure? I think that's 1158 01:02:51,040 --> 01:02:53,520 Speaker 1: a really good question. At once that I get a 1159 01:02:53,520 --> 01:02:56,520 Speaker 1: lot in patents that come to see me in the office. Um, 1160 01:02:56,600 --> 01:03:00,680 Speaker 1: So the optimal age is really around age thirty. Um, 1161 01:03:00,920 --> 01:03:05,000 Speaker 1: that women should start thinking about egg freezing, um, and 1162 01:03:05,080 --> 01:03:08,240 Speaker 1: kind of evaluating where they're at in their life and 1163 01:03:08,480 --> 01:03:11,840 Speaker 1: how long it may be before they plan to have kids. Um, 1164 01:03:11,880 --> 01:03:16,360 Speaker 1: there isn't. Uh. As women start to get closer to forty, 1165 01:03:16,400 --> 01:03:20,840 Speaker 1: we do see a lower response and the eggs themselves, Um, 1166 01:03:21,440 --> 01:03:24,920 Speaker 1: I have a higher chance of not making a successful pregnancy. 1167 01:03:25,080 --> 01:03:27,800 Speaker 1: So as women approached the age of forty, that's getting 1168 01:03:28,200 --> 01:03:31,080 Speaker 1: kind of towards the end of the optimal window. Um. 1169 01:03:31,720 --> 01:03:35,040 Speaker 1: And then usually in the lower forties is when I 1170 01:03:35,080 --> 01:03:42,000 Speaker 1: would say she probably shouldn't shouldn't pursue that option? Wow, okay, Um? 1171 01:03:42,120 --> 01:03:46,240 Speaker 1: And then how do people know? I mean, for example, 1172 01:03:46,280 --> 01:03:49,520 Speaker 1: I didn't know that I was going to have fertility 1173 01:03:49,600 --> 01:03:52,040 Speaker 1: issues until I started getting pregnant. Is there a way 1174 01:03:52,080 --> 01:03:55,200 Speaker 1: to find that out prior? I mean I I was 1175 01:03:55,320 --> 01:04:00,240 Speaker 1: only eight when I think nine when I first off 1176 01:04:00,280 --> 01:04:03,200 Speaker 1: the pill and started trying to get pregnant. UM. Is 1177 01:04:03,240 --> 01:04:05,880 Speaker 1: there a way to find out in advance? So let's 1178 01:04:05,880 --> 01:04:08,040 Speaker 1: say you're twenty eight year years old and you're thinking, 1179 01:04:08,040 --> 01:04:11,040 Speaker 1: I'm nowhere near settling down and I'm not even anywhere 1180 01:04:11,040 --> 01:04:13,120 Speaker 1: near wanting to freeze my eggs, but I am curious 1181 01:04:13,120 --> 01:04:15,920 Speaker 1: about my fertility. Is that a possibility? Can you even 1182 01:04:16,000 --> 01:04:18,840 Speaker 1: check that? Can you find out? Yeah? I think the 1183 01:04:18,960 --> 01:04:22,240 Speaker 1: certain things that may point to their being UM an 1184 01:04:22,280 --> 01:04:26,360 Speaker 1: issue with fertility UM some women know already that maybe 1185 01:04:26,440 --> 01:04:30,040 Speaker 1: they had a surgery or you know, a flobbian tubermoved 1186 01:04:30,320 --> 01:04:35,160 Speaker 1: those things UM obviously would cause an issue with attempting pregnancy. UM. 1187 01:04:35,200 --> 01:04:41,040 Speaker 1: If there's heavy uterine bleeding UM or known UM issues 1188 01:04:41,040 --> 01:04:43,960 Speaker 1: with the uterus, which as like fibroids or polyps, which 1189 01:04:43,960 --> 01:04:47,840 Speaker 1: are benign growth in the uterus UM. What about endometriosis 1190 01:04:48,640 --> 01:04:54,040 Speaker 1: and demetriosis is very common and can impact fertility as well. 1191 01:04:54,080 --> 01:04:58,800 Speaker 1: So sciences of that that women might notice are painful periods. 1192 01:04:59,200 --> 01:05:02,919 Speaker 1: Pain with inner corpse sometimes came with bell movements. UM. 1193 01:05:03,200 --> 01:05:05,120 Speaker 1: Those are kind of the big questions that we ask 1194 01:05:05,200 --> 01:05:09,880 Speaker 1: and may suggest endometriosist um. Additionally, on ultrasound we may 1195 01:05:09,920 --> 01:05:14,040 Speaker 1: see signs which was a big O variant could suggest endometriosis. 1196 01:05:14,200 --> 01:05:19,440 Speaker 1: Is there what about STDs UM another good question? So 1197 01:05:19,560 --> 01:05:22,840 Speaker 1: a s TVs UM specifically the ones that caused pelvic 1198 01:05:22,880 --> 01:05:26,560 Speaker 1: inflammatory disease like GONERI and are the most common ones. 1199 01:05:27,120 --> 01:05:31,560 Speaker 1: UM can impair the fulopian tubes, So if a woman 1200 01:05:31,640 --> 01:05:34,720 Speaker 1: does have a history of that, it's worthwhile mentioning that 1201 01:05:34,800 --> 01:05:37,760 Speaker 1: to her joan the fertility doctors so they can saluate 1202 01:05:37,800 --> 01:05:42,160 Speaker 1: if the flobian okay. And then how long would you 1203 01:05:42,200 --> 01:05:45,000 Speaker 1: recommend to somebody to be off birth control before they 1204 01:05:45,000 --> 01:05:50,080 Speaker 1: try to get pregnant. We as a field used to 1205 01:05:50,120 --> 01:05:51,760 Speaker 1: think that women had to come off a couple of 1206 01:05:52,040 --> 01:05:56,360 Speaker 1: months before attempting pregnancy. UM, we really don't see that 1207 01:05:56,880 --> 01:05:59,760 Speaker 1: there needs to be that washout period. So I say, 1208 01:06:00,280 --> 01:06:02,959 Speaker 1: if you're thinking you want to start attempts next month, 1209 01:06:03,040 --> 01:06:05,880 Speaker 1: you can go ahead and just stop them right before 1210 01:06:06,120 --> 01:06:08,760 Speaker 1: the month you want to conceive, and then attempt right 1211 01:06:08,760 --> 01:06:11,000 Speaker 1: away with your next period. And do you think there's 1212 01:06:11,040 --> 01:06:14,280 Speaker 1: like the best birth control you know like, if you 1213 01:06:14,320 --> 01:06:16,680 Speaker 1: know you're gonna eventually want to have kids, should you 1214 01:06:16,800 --> 01:06:18,480 Speaker 1: get should you be on the pill or should you 1215 01:06:18,520 --> 01:06:20,560 Speaker 1: be on I don't know the ring or the I 1216 01:06:20,600 --> 01:06:23,600 Speaker 1: don't know all the other ones I don't know, but 1217 01:06:23,640 --> 01:06:27,320 Speaker 1: you Yeah, no, there's definitely a lot of options out there. 1218 01:06:27,360 --> 01:06:30,320 Speaker 1: I think at the end of the day. Um, it 1219 01:06:30,360 --> 01:06:32,680 Speaker 1: all comes down to patient preference. So your chances of 1220 01:06:32,720 --> 01:06:37,000 Speaker 1: fertility after being on the pill or having an iu D, 1221 01:06:37,040 --> 01:06:41,520 Speaker 1: for example, are not significantly different. Um. Basically, I would 1222 01:06:41,600 --> 01:06:43,720 Speaker 1: choose the birth control that makes the most sense to 1223 01:06:43,880 --> 01:06:46,400 Speaker 1: you in your lifestyle. So if someone women don't want 1224 01:06:46,400 --> 01:06:48,280 Speaker 1: to think about having to take a pill every day, 1225 01:06:48,320 --> 01:06:51,600 Speaker 1: so and that scenario and iu D may make sense. 1226 01:06:51,680 --> 01:06:53,960 Speaker 1: But other women don't like the idea of having something 1227 01:06:53,960 --> 01:06:55,760 Speaker 1: in their body, you know, in which case the pill 1228 01:06:55,840 --> 01:06:59,360 Speaker 1: may be better. So, UM, it's really what works best 1229 01:06:59,400 --> 01:07:02,120 Speaker 1: for her. Okay, now we're going to switch gears a 1230 01:07:02,200 --> 01:07:04,960 Speaker 1: little bit. I need to I personally need to know. 1231 01:07:05,000 --> 01:07:07,320 Speaker 1: And there was actually another guest on here that had 1232 01:07:07,360 --> 01:07:11,120 Speaker 1: the same reaction. Why does chlomad make us crazy? And 1233 01:07:11,160 --> 01:07:17,000 Speaker 1: what does it actually do? I need all the details. Sure, Um, 1234 01:07:17,040 --> 01:07:19,960 Speaker 1: so Colona is a medication. Um, as it sounds like. 1235 01:07:20,000 --> 01:07:22,240 Speaker 1: You know that you if you take as a pill, 1236 01:07:22,680 --> 01:07:24,360 Speaker 1: usually for a couple of days at the beginning of 1237 01:07:24,400 --> 01:07:27,080 Speaker 1: a cycle, and it can help you form a follic 1238 01:07:27,080 --> 01:07:30,040 Speaker 1: color more than one follicle to either time intercourse, I 1239 01:07:30,280 --> 01:07:33,439 Speaker 1: do intermination. The way that chlomad works is it sort 1240 01:07:33,480 --> 01:07:36,480 Speaker 1: of tricks your brain into thinking that there's no estrogen 1241 01:07:36,560 --> 01:07:39,960 Speaker 1: around and um. As a result, your brain kind of 1242 01:07:40,440 --> 01:07:46,240 Speaker 1: um kick start and um and stimulates the ovaries to 1243 01:07:46,640 --> 01:07:50,360 Speaker 1: produce follicles. So when there's no your brain thinks there's 1244 01:07:50,360 --> 01:07:52,760 Speaker 1: no estrogen around, then it will work harder to make 1245 01:07:52,800 --> 01:07:57,280 Speaker 1: the ovaries grow a follow color too. Um. So what 1246 01:07:57,600 --> 01:08:01,120 Speaker 1: is happening is in response to the clomad um. Since 1247 01:08:01,160 --> 01:08:03,160 Speaker 1: your brain thinks there's no astros in there, you can 1248 01:08:03,200 --> 01:08:07,360 Speaker 1: sometimes have symptoms of low estrogen. So that's what women 1249 01:08:07,400 --> 01:08:11,400 Speaker 1: often go through when the rage going through menopause. Correctly, yeah, exactly. 1250 01:08:11,480 --> 01:08:15,560 Speaker 1: So like mood changes, some conversations, complaine of headaches or 1251 01:08:16,160 --> 01:08:19,240 Speaker 1: vaginal dryness, that can all be a result of the 1252 01:08:19,280 --> 01:08:23,200 Speaker 1: way that the medicine works. Okay, and then also something 1253 01:08:23,240 --> 01:08:26,400 Speaker 1: that my doctor said that I had And I know 1254 01:08:26,479 --> 01:08:28,200 Speaker 1: this sounds crazy, but you kind I kind of like 1255 01:08:28,240 --> 01:08:31,080 Speaker 1: started blacking out things that were happening to me because 1256 01:08:31,520 --> 01:08:33,640 Speaker 1: or not to me, but things that were happening with 1257 01:08:33,680 --> 01:08:35,840 Speaker 1: my body because I didn't want to know because then 1258 01:08:35,840 --> 01:08:39,519 Speaker 1: I would start researching it. But he said, during you know, 1259 01:08:39,560 --> 01:08:42,519 Speaker 1: when some of my ivfs were not working, he said 1260 01:08:42,560 --> 01:08:45,360 Speaker 1: that I had a killer cell that refers to like 1261 01:08:45,479 --> 01:08:48,040 Speaker 1: natural killer cells is the cell type in our body 1262 01:08:48,040 --> 01:08:51,679 Speaker 1: as part of the immune system. UM. And there are 1263 01:08:51,800 --> 01:08:55,080 Speaker 1: some people in the fertility world that believe that immunologic 1264 01:08:55,200 --> 01:08:59,040 Speaker 1: causes UM may impact pregnancy rate. So if your immune 1265 01:08:59,040 --> 01:09:03,400 Speaker 1: system is kind of harder or an overdrive that may 1266 01:09:03,760 --> 01:09:10,559 Speaker 1: impair implantation or pregnancy is success. UM. We there's there's 1267 01:09:10,640 --> 01:09:13,240 Speaker 1: data to support both, yes, and know that it matters. 1268 01:09:13,280 --> 01:09:15,160 Speaker 1: So I think depending on who you talk to, you 1269 01:09:15,200 --> 01:09:18,360 Speaker 1: could a different answer. Okay, And then what is pc 1270 01:09:18,640 --> 01:09:24,040 Speaker 1: O S? Yeah, So pos PCOS stands for polycystic ovary 1271 01:09:24,160 --> 01:09:29,840 Speaker 1: syndrome UM. It's a condition where women have irregular menstrual cycles. 1272 01:09:30,360 --> 01:09:34,240 Speaker 1: UM is the most common symptom of it. They these 1273 01:09:34,280 --> 01:09:39,200 Speaker 1: women form multiple small um fists in the ovaries and 1274 01:09:39,280 --> 01:09:42,280 Speaker 1: they're not actually ovariant sist. They're really follicles in the 1275 01:09:42,320 --> 01:09:45,920 Speaker 1: ovaray that haven't gone away, and so what we'll see 1276 01:09:45,920 --> 01:09:50,240 Speaker 1: in these women is the typical presentation is irregular menstrual 1277 01:09:50,320 --> 01:09:55,040 Speaker 1: cycles ovariant um fists or those small follicles in the ovaries, 1278 01:09:55,360 --> 01:09:59,960 Speaker 1: and then often elevated levels of male hormone such as testosterone. 1279 01:10:00,720 --> 01:10:04,639 Speaker 1: And what this condition does is it UM prevents them 1280 01:10:04,640 --> 01:10:08,360 Speaker 1: from having normal ovulation every month, and so if they're 1281 01:10:08,400 --> 01:10:12,479 Speaker 1: not ovulating on a regular interval, stat equates to obviously 1282 01:10:12,520 --> 01:10:18,480 Speaker 1: difficulty and conceiving, especially if you're trying to time attempts appropriately. 1283 01:10:18,800 --> 01:10:21,879 Speaker 1: And if you have one of these medical conditions, will 1284 01:10:21,920 --> 01:10:27,600 Speaker 1: IVF or any of these fertility treatments be covered by insurance? UM? 1285 01:10:27,720 --> 01:10:30,439 Speaker 1: I wish it was covered more often than it is. UM. 1286 01:10:31,439 --> 01:10:34,559 Speaker 1: It depends on what what and the patients with if 1287 01:10:34,600 --> 01:10:39,360 Speaker 1: you have coverage. So we are seeing more employers offer 1288 01:10:39,439 --> 01:10:43,639 Speaker 1: this as a benefit UM and WET at my facility 1289 01:10:43,640 --> 01:10:46,240 Speaker 1: at r m A definitely work with insurance that patients 1290 01:10:46,280 --> 01:10:50,439 Speaker 1: have it UM, but I right now there's still a 1291 01:10:50,520 --> 01:10:54,320 Speaker 1: lot of patients that are unfortunately paying out of pocket. Wow. 1292 01:10:54,760 --> 01:10:58,520 Speaker 1: And what what is the difference between a chemical pregnancy 1293 01:10:58,560 --> 01:11:03,360 Speaker 1: and a topic pregnancy? UM? So, a chemical pregnancy is 1294 01:11:03,360 --> 01:11:06,800 Speaker 1: where we just see evidence at the patient's pregnant on 1295 01:11:06,880 --> 01:11:09,840 Speaker 1: her blood work, but we don't see anything on ultrasound, 1296 01:11:09,840 --> 01:11:13,640 Speaker 1: either in the uterus or anywhere else. UM, And a 1297 01:11:13,800 --> 01:11:17,559 Speaker 1: topic pregnancy is where she's definitely pregnant, we see it 1298 01:11:17,560 --> 01:11:20,360 Speaker 1: on blood work, but when we do the ultrasound, you 1299 01:11:20,360 --> 01:11:24,719 Speaker 1: can see that the pregnancy actually implanted outside of the uterus. 1300 01:11:24,840 --> 01:11:29,000 Speaker 1: So the most commonplace would be somewhere along the fallopian tube. UM, 1301 01:11:29,120 --> 01:11:32,400 Speaker 1: but we often, not often, I'm sorry, we can also 1302 01:11:32,439 --> 01:11:35,280 Speaker 1: see it in the ovary. How common are those to 1303 01:11:35,400 --> 01:11:41,799 Speaker 1: happen and are they as common as as miscarriages? UM? 1304 01:11:41,840 --> 01:11:46,160 Speaker 1: Definitely not as common as miscarriages, so UM miscarriages. We 1305 01:11:47,040 --> 01:11:52,160 Speaker 1: knows that about thirty percent of UM recognized pregnancy result 1306 01:11:52,240 --> 01:11:56,519 Speaker 1: in miscarriage. So UM it's miscarriage is so common, and 1307 01:11:56,560 --> 01:11:59,400 Speaker 1: I think women that go through that may not realize 1308 01:11:59,400 --> 01:12:02,719 Speaker 1: it because if it's not something people often talk about, 1309 01:12:03,360 --> 01:12:07,320 Speaker 1: but it is incredibly common. A topic pregnancy, the chance 1310 01:12:07,360 --> 01:12:10,240 Speaker 1: of that is much lower. UM. I don't have a 1311 01:12:10,400 --> 01:12:13,680 Speaker 1: definitive percent, but it's in the single digit so it's 1312 01:12:13,800 --> 01:12:16,360 Speaker 1: much less common than a miscarriage. So if you're not 1313 01:12:16,400 --> 01:12:19,160 Speaker 1: trying to get pregnant, you don't actually know that you're pregnant, 1314 01:12:19,200 --> 01:12:22,800 Speaker 1: how would you know that you're having a miscarriage. The 1315 01:12:22,840 --> 01:12:27,920 Speaker 1: most common sign would be U vaginal bleeding. So if 1316 01:12:27,920 --> 01:12:29,840 Speaker 1: you're heavy, if you know you're pregnant based on a 1317 01:12:29,880 --> 01:12:31,960 Speaker 1: home pregnancy test, then you haven't been able to get 1318 01:12:31,960 --> 01:12:35,200 Speaker 1: into see your doctor yet. If you're having a vaginal bleeding, 1319 01:12:35,320 --> 01:12:39,000 Speaker 1: that's something that should be should be looked at either 1320 01:12:39,040 --> 01:12:42,479 Speaker 1: by your physician or if it's heavy bleeding, you know, 1321 01:12:42,520 --> 01:12:46,200 Speaker 1: seeking more immediate care. Uh. Sometimes women will have like 1322 01:12:46,320 --> 01:12:49,639 Speaker 1: heavy menstrual type cramping as well. What if somebody doesn't 1323 01:12:49,640 --> 01:12:54,000 Speaker 1: go to the doctor, Um, if they're kind of just 1324 01:12:54,040 --> 01:12:57,519 Speaker 1: waiting it out at home to see what happens. I mean, 1325 01:12:57,600 --> 01:13:00,679 Speaker 1: I've known someone that doesn't know if they were actually pregnant, 1326 01:13:00,720 --> 01:13:04,120 Speaker 1: didn't actually take a pregnancy test, and they just started having, 1327 01:13:04,320 --> 01:13:07,880 Speaker 1: you know a lot of bleeding, and then they were like, 1328 01:13:07,920 --> 01:13:09,400 Speaker 1: you know what, I don't really want to know if 1329 01:13:09,439 --> 01:13:13,400 Speaker 1: I had one, Oh I see, um, well in less 1330 01:13:13,479 --> 01:13:16,760 Speaker 1: nor I mean, she she made never actually know if 1331 01:13:16,760 --> 01:13:19,479 Speaker 1: she doesn't go in to see somebody, if she had 1332 01:13:19,520 --> 01:13:21,559 Speaker 1: what a lot of women may have what they think 1333 01:13:21,680 --> 01:13:25,040 Speaker 1: is just a late period that's heavier than usual that 1334 01:13:25,920 --> 01:13:28,360 Speaker 1: you know, in theory could have been a lost So 1335 01:13:28,400 --> 01:13:33,200 Speaker 1: if she didn't see a doctor in that time period. Um, 1336 01:13:33,520 --> 01:13:37,200 Speaker 1: sometimes with the heavier bleeding, you might it might look different, 1337 01:13:37,439 --> 01:13:42,240 Speaker 1: or um, you might feel heavier cramps. Um. So those 1338 01:13:42,280 --> 01:13:44,720 Speaker 1: may all be suggestive of that, but it's hard to 1339 01:13:44,720 --> 01:13:48,000 Speaker 1: know without either blood test or ultrasound. And then I 1340 01:13:48,040 --> 01:13:50,080 Speaker 1: just have another question that people have been asking me, 1341 01:13:50,080 --> 01:13:52,120 Speaker 1: and I don't actually even know the answer, even though 1342 01:13:52,120 --> 01:13:55,800 Speaker 1: I've asked my doctor. I always I always forget to 1343 01:13:55,840 --> 01:13:59,600 Speaker 1: follow up. But I my first pregnancy, I was in 1344 01:13:59,640 --> 01:14:02,200 Speaker 1: some aid in my second was IVF, and then third 1345 01:14:02,240 --> 01:14:05,120 Speaker 1: just happened naturally. I wasn't trying. I didn't even realize 1346 01:14:05,120 --> 01:14:08,000 Speaker 1: that I was pregnant because even during the first eight 1347 01:14:08,000 --> 01:14:11,759 Speaker 1: weeks before I became pregnant, I was still spotting because 1348 01:14:11,760 --> 01:14:15,240 Speaker 1: I've never really had like a perfectly regular period. Okay, 1349 01:14:15,400 --> 01:14:18,799 Speaker 1: but why does that happen? And how does that happen 1350 01:14:19,040 --> 01:14:21,479 Speaker 1: that you need all of these you know, years and 1351 01:14:21,560 --> 01:14:23,559 Speaker 1: years of things and then all of a sudden you 1352 01:14:23,560 --> 01:14:27,800 Speaker 1: just get pregnant on your own. Right. Um. Congratulations by 1353 01:14:27,840 --> 01:14:31,160 Speaker 1: the way, Yeah, that that is something that we hear 1354 01:14:31,439 --> 01:14:36,280 Speaker 1: um from patients sometimes and obviously are UM very happy 1355 01:14:36,320 --> 01:14:38,559 Speaker 1: when that that does happen if patients were trying for 1356 01:14:38,600 --> 01:14:43,240 Speaker 1: another child, But there there isn't really anything about the 1357 01:14:43,320 --> 01:14:47,519 Speaker 1: treatment per se that would make you more fertile afterwards. UM. 1358 01:14:47,560 --> 01:14:52,760 Speaker 1: I personally think it's a combination of UM kind of 1359 01:14:52,800 --> 01:14:57,800 Speaker 1: a decrease in UH stressed UH autent patients seem like 1360 01:14:57,800 --> 01:15:00,360 Speaker 1: they're in a better place like mentally or most really 1361 01:15:00,720 --> 01:15:02,840 Speaker 1: and kind of just relax a little bit more. And 1362 01:15:03,160 --> 01:15:06,800 Speaker 1: I do think that that can impact things UM and 1363 01:15:07,200 --> 01:15:09,719 Speaker 1: once they kind of get a little bit more level 1364 01:15:09,800 --> 01:15:14,160 Speaker 1: with regards to that, UM are surprised and able to conceive. 1365 01:15:15,000 --> 01:15:17,360 Speaker 1: And just in closing my form, my last question before 1366 01:15:17,400 --> 01:15:20,160 Speaker 1: I have to wrap it up, what advice would you 1367 01:15:20,160 --> 01:15:25,839 Speaker 1: give to somebody who's struggling. I think it's just the big, 1368 01:15:26,360 --> 01:15:30,280 Speaker 1: big message would be keep holding out hope UM, and 1369 01:15:30,320 --> 01:15:34,120 Speaker 1: you're not alone. So there's a lot of women that 1370 01:15:34,240 --> 01:15:38,160 Speaker 1: experience difficulty and conceiving UM, and it's such a personal 1371 01:15:38,240 --> 01:15:42,040 Speaker 1: thing that not everyone will be talking about it, so 1372 01:15:42,240 --> 01:15:45,240 Speaker 1: it can be an isolating experience. And I do want 1373 01:15:45,280 --> 01:15:48,920 Speaker 1: patience to know that UM, there are ways that we 1374 01:15:49,000 --> 01:15:52,240 Speaker 1: can help you and to maintain a positive outlook on 1375 01:15:52,280 --> 01:15:55,920 Speaker 1: it and note that, um, you're not alone in experiencing this, 1376 01:15:56,240 --> 01:16:00,679 Speaker 1: and there's paths you can take to build your family 1377 01:16:00,720 --> 01:16:03,360 Speaker 1: and get the outcome that you're looking for. Thank you 1378 01:16:03,400 --> 01:16:06,080 Speaker 1: so much for your time. We really appreciate it. Thank 1379 01:16:06,080 --> 01:16:07,840 Speaker 1: you so much. It was a pleasure speaking with you. 1380 01:16:08,479 --> 01:16:13,760 Speaker 1: Bye bye. So now we finished up with Katherine Green. 1381 01:16:13,840 --> 01:16:15,960 Speaker 1: We're almost out of time. But I could tell Chuck, 1382 01:16:16,160 --> 01:16:18,479 Speaker 1: our engineer keeps like giving me a look, like what's 1383 01:16:18,520 --> 01:16:22,000 Speaker 1: going on? What do you need? Um? I hadn't, she questioned. 1384 01:16:22,040 --> 01:16:26,040 Speaker 1: Happened to me last week? My ex girlfriend hit me 1385 01:16:26,160 --> 01:16:29,640 Speaker 1: up and proposed wanting to have a child with me 1386 01:16:31,640 --> 01:16:39,400 Speaker 1: out of the blue. Do you like her? M hm? Hold, okay, 1387 01:16:39,560 --> 01:16:42,240 Speaker 1: does she want your sperm or she wants you guys 1388 01:16:42,280 --> 01:16:45,559 Speaker 1: to go like she wants to have a child. Okay, 1389 01:16:45,600 --> 01:16:47,240 Speaker 1: But I have a lot of question. Did you ask? 1390 01:16:47,360 --> 01:16:50,120 Speaker 1: Does that mean like are we are we like going 1391 01:16:50,160 --> 01:16:53,360 Speaker 1: to hook up or like that's the first question? Okay, 1392 01:16:53,400 --> 01:16:56,320 Speaker 1: So like take you got in two minutes? You got 1393 01:16:56,320 --> 01:16:58,799 Speaker 1: to tell us, all right, my fel we've been hooking 1394 01:16:58,880 --> 01:17:01,320 Speaker 1: up on and off for the past seven years. Well 1395 01:17:01,320 --> 01:17:07,559 Speaker 1: that's on you then, and I've been like literally pushing 1396 01:17:07,600 --> 01:17:11,000 Speaker 1: away like like, go away, go away, go away, fall 1397 01:17:11,040 --> 01:17:13,519 Speaker 1: in love, find somebody you fall in love with who 1398 01:17:13,560 --> 01:17:15,400 Speaker 1: loves you. You know what I can, I can already 1399 01:17:15,400 --> 01:17:19,759 Speaker 1: tell you something. But having sex with her then well no, seriously, seriously, 1400 01:17:19,840 --> 01:17:23,320 Speaker 1: I I have been away for a long period of time. 1401 01:17:23,400 --> 01:17:26,640 Speaker 1: How long? Probably about over a year? Okay, all right, 1402 01:17:26,840 --> 01:17:29,479 Speaker 1: that's fair. But now she wants to have a baby 1403 01:17:29,479 --> 01:17:33,080 Speaker 1: with you. What do you guys think Chuck should do? 1404 01:17:33,240 --> 01:17:35,479 Speaker 1: Please write in and let us know. I mean, I 1405 01:17:35,520 --> 01:17:37,320 Speaker 1: have my thoughts, but we know I'm gonna know it all, 1406 01:17:37,320 --> 01:17:40,080 Speaker 1: so I'm gonna hold it till next week. Thanks for listening. 1407 01:17:40,520 --> 01:17:44,920 Speaker 1: Subscribe to any radio or wherever you listen to podcast