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Speaker 1: Hello the Internet, and welcome to this episode of Owner

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Speaker 1: of a Trending Heart. Courtesy of Panoramic View on the discord. Uh,

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Speaker 1: Owner of a Lonely Heart is the original way that

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Speaker 1: that one goes. But I did not know what they

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Speaker 1: were saying in that song. Hall, it's one of those.

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Speaker 1: It's it's that one. Anyways. My name is Jack o' brown.

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Speaker 1: I'm throwing to be joined by black wetlin. It's wetual healing.

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Speaker 1: And that's what I got for you. Oh no, I

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Speaker 1: said it was gross before it even got fully disgusting,

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Speaker 1: the way it was, just the way your voice turned.

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Speaker 1: Can I tell you something sad? No?

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Speaker 2: No, God, My legs are small.

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Speaker 1: So so they got small on your ass.

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Speaker 2: They got really small because I didn't work them out

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Speaker 2: for a few days.

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Speaker 1: Oh my god, just a few days, so saw buddy.

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Speaker 2: But I'm gonna get a lot of new hours that

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Speaker 2: make them look bigger and then I'm going to burst

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Speaker 2: through my pants.

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Speaker 1: You wait, you wait, it's just your it's just your

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Speaker 1: thighs are small. Your thighs look like yes, but your

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Speaker 1: calves look like Popeye's forearms. They do they do, they do.

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Speaker 2: It's they're doing most of the work right now, I'm

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Speaker 2: walking as if like like a horse on its hind

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Speaker 2: legs basically with that agility.

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Speaker 1: But you can't see me at that. You can't.

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Speaker 2: You see leg You see them when they like, yeah,

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Speaker 2: you know, when they even rear back parry. Yeah, yeah,

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Speaker 2: so it's kind of like that. But walking, Yeah, I

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Speaker 2: love horses.

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Speaker 1: Makes sense. The Philadelphia Eagles fan, we've seen your special

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Speaker 1: relationship to horses as it's convased. Yes, it's very cadidated.

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Speaker 1: It's incredibly complicated. How much like do you have, like

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Speaker 1: international relations It's that complicated. Blake, thank you so much

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Speaker 1: for joining filling in four miles. Well, he is a

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Speaker 1: traveling Should we tell the people some of the stuff

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Speaker 1: that is trending?

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Speaker 2: I think this is the right time to do that,

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Speaker 2: and I appreciate it if you did it, because I

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Speaker 2: don't want to.

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Speaker 1: Okay, yeah, that is I don't have in front of me.

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Speaker 1: It's it's like just trying to stretch as as long

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Speaker 1: as possible before we have to talk about the news,

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Speaker 1: and especially today because we have bad news. There's a

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Speaker 1: large bruise on our president's hand and people think it

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Speaker 1: might be Bruce from an IV port and We're just

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Speaker 1: worried about him. You know, mysterious bruising is how we

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Speaker 1: lost Mitch McConnell. You know, like, first bruise start appearing,

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Speaker 1: then Mitch McConnell powered down in the middle of a

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Speaker 1: sentence for ninety seconds and has to be escorted off stage,

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Speaker 1: and then a mirror two years later he's resigning. So

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Speaker 1: we just don't want to see this sort of thing

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Speaker 1: from our dear leader.

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Speaker 2: This is different because the bruises for Mitchell were on

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Speaker 2: his brain primarily, and.

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Speaker 1: They were closer to his brain for sure. It was

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Speaker 1: like his neck and face. Yeah right, well those are

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Speaker 1: the ones visible to the human eye. Yeah, A got it.

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Speaker 2: And President Trump, I can't imagine it couldn't have been

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Speaker 2: an IV like just harm that man, that strong, beefy

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Speaker 2: strong man. He must have been shot in the hand

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Speaker 2: for something like that.

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Speaker 1: It's how quickly he heals from the bullet wound in

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Speaker 1: to the ear. Jesus, Yes, man's got elephant skin. To

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Speaker 1: quote and the editor he he claims that he has

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Speaker 1: a bruise on his hand from shaking hands all day

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Speaker 1: every day. Is that true?

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Speaker 2: Yeah, that's what they're saying. Kind of just say something else, Yeah.

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Speaker 1: No, fuck it, we'll just go with the like that

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Speaker 1: the point is. And I wish it hadn't taken me

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Speaker 1: eight years to ten years to get that this is

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Speaker 1: the point. The point is to say something that makes

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Speaker 1: us say what does he think we're stupid? Or you know,

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Speaker 1: like that that's an insult to our intelligence. That is

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Speaker 1: the point. It is. His point is to insult your intelligence.

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Speaker 1: And then you talk about it, and then all of

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Speaker 1: his supporters are like, look at the fucking triggered libs.

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Speaker 2: And then and then in the meantime, he's done seventy

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Speaker 2: five of the most fucked up things you can imagine,

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Speaker 2: and you can't catch up. And then he has a

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Speaker 2: little bruise again, and and then a new bruise appears.

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Speaker 2: He says, sorry, I have elephant titus, and it's like,

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Speaker 2: did he mean elephant's skin?

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Speaker 1: What is he talking about?

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Speaker 2: And then he's shut down on the elephant tusks.

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Speaker 1: Uh, did you get the ones that I sent you

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Speaker 1: in the mail? By the way, kind that's such a

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Speaker 1: kind of gift.

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Speaker 2: Of course, you were going through a tough time and

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Speaker 2: I sent you both.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, anyways, we're just you know, thoughts and prayers, go

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Speaker 1: out to the big Man and also to because the

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Speaker 1: Pope is in critical condition. The world waits on the

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Speaker 1: edge of its seat because he had double pneumonia, and

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Speaker 1: people were like, I didn't know that was a thing.

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Speaker 1: He's uh currently in critical condition, and I this is

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Speaker 1: an incredible tie in to the Oscar campaign for Conclave.

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Speaker 1: I don't know if you guys watched Conclave. Did you

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Speaker 1: watch Conclave? Of course?

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Speaker 2: And I want it well finish your thought. I'm want

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Speaker 2: to come back back.

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Speaker 1: Just that, like this is an amazing well I thought

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Speaker 1: Conclave was a great time of the movies, but now

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Speaker 1: I'm thinking about it regularly because it's actually happening. You know,

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Speaker 1: it's actually about to happen. And I do think that

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Speaker 1: there are like there have been some good long read

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Speaker 1: articles about like the internal battle for the Catholic Church

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Speaker 1: and like, how you know this is the liberal pope.

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Speaker 1: You know this guy? Yeah, and like the other pope was,

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Speaker 1: like the previous pope was conservative Nazi pope, Nazi youth pope.

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Speaker 1: I should say, yeah, And like I think there's a

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Speaker 1: lot of people just waiting in the wings, like oh, yeah,

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Speaker 1: we're going to take this ship back to the dark ages, homie,

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Speaker 1: that is a brutal thing I haven't thought about.

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Speaker 2: But now am and my wife and I did see Conclave,

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Speaker 2: and I think you might be able to relate to

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Speaker 2: this where your partner knew was you so fucking well

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Speaker 2: at this point that even a slightly different diction or

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Speaker 2: manner of speaking, they're like, what the fuck is going

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Speaker 2: on with you? Where I was thinking in my head

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Speaker 2: that exact thing of like there might be another conclave

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Speaker 2: soon is what I wanted to say to her, because

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Speaker 2: she hadn't heard about the pope yet. But the way

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Speaker 2: it came out where I was like, because in the morning,

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Speaker 2: I just go, the Pope is very sick. He might

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Speaker 2: not make it, and which is not how I would

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Speaker 2: ever talk to her about a pope, like the Pope

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Speaker 2: is quite sick, he might not make it, and she's like, okay,

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Speaker 2: fucking weirdo. But the way I would talk about that

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Speaker 2: is like, oh, there might be another conclave because you

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Speaker 2: know the Pope is going through something right now, is

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Speaker 2: how I talk.

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Speaker 1: Remember when we saw conclave, well that might be him, yeah, yeah.

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Speaker 1: But I put my hand on her shoulder and I said,

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Speaker 1: the Pope is quite sick. He's novella. Right, he's like

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Speaker 1: a like a eighth grade Spanish language translation, like the

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Speaker 1: pope is very sick. Do you know who the bookstore is? Yes,

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Speaker 1: Bernie Sanders is on a coast to coast tour of

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Speaker 1: town hall events dubbed fighting oligarchy. This appears, you know,

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Speaker 1: this is as other Democrats are busy doing unclear nothing. Yeah, yeah,

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Speaker 1: so he is. You know, we I think we were like,

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Speaker 1: all right, so now it's time to see who's gonna

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Speaker 1: step up. Can't be Bernie because he's ninety seven and

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Speaker 1: just like you know, burned a lot of good will

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Speaker 1: by being pro Israel and pro Biden. It's gonna be Bernie. Guys,

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Speaker 1: there's nobody else turn out. It's that's that's the only

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Speaker 1: one who's like seeing this and being like this is

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Speaker 1: bad as of right now. Maybe maybe he will show

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Speaker 1: the Democratic Party that there's a lot of energy there.

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Speaker 1: What he seems to be doing is going to particularly

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Speaker 1: conservative areas and having town halls and where he talks

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Speaker 1: about how oligarchy bad kind of an American kind of

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Speaker 1: against the thing that you guys seem to be so

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Speaker 1: into here in these red areas of the country. And

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Speaker 1: when he does that, thousands of people are turning out,

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Speaker 1: like they're you know, having to turn people away because

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Speaker 1: there's so many people. And yeah, he just seems to

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Speaker 1: be the only person who's actually being able to like

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Speaker 1: fight through the demoralization and frustration among you know, the

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Speaker 1: people who actually are affiliated with the Democratic Party.

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Speaker 2: The guy, you know, he puts his money where his

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Speaker 2: mouth is, you know, or unfortunately it manifested with the

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Speaker 2: pro Israel stuff recently. But unfortunately, you know, like eight

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Speaker 2: I did say unfortunately, right, yeah, yeah, okay.

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Speaker 1: Good, Yeah, I second yet that okay, thank god.

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Speaker 2: So but then, you know, eighty five percent of the time,

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Speaker 2: ninety percent of the time, you know, the guy, he's

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Speaker 2: the workhorse that no one wants to ride. Yeah, you know,

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Speaker 2: it's like, all right, he's not he's not running for anything.

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Speaker 2: It's not like, oh, you know, if I if I

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Speaker 2: go to Nebraska, some conservative part of Nebraska, I will

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Speaker 2: get a eightieth term in Vermont. You know, like there's

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Speaker 2: he really is just doing it because nobody fucking else.

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Speaker 1: Nobody else seems to be willing to do it. Yeah.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, there's no presidential run coming. He's just chugging along.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I so you know, Jacobin went to one of

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Speaker 1: these rallies and spoke to some of the attendees who

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Speaker 1: seemed to be and this is going to surprise you,

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Speaker 1: fed up with the Democrats quote pathetic non response to Trump.

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Speaker 1: There it is what what if? What's those people's problem? Yeah?

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Speaker 1: I do think if I had to guess, if I

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Speaker 1: know my if I know my Democratic Party, they are

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Speaker 1: going to respond to this by being like, the challenge

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Speaker 1: has been set, let's let's go out there and fight. No,

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Speaker 1: they're going to be like Bernie Sanders can go fuck himself.

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Speaker 1: How do we fight this? How do we undermine? Do

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Speaker 1: we fight Bernie Sanders? Yes? How do we fight this

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Speaker 1: movement that he is showing us how to build? Uh?

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Speaker 1: Would be my guess. I don't know. But what the

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Speaker 1: fuck do I know? All Right, here's a fun one, blake. Yeah, yeah, good,

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Speaker 1: go go good. You ever seen this Mile High Club?

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Speaker 1: You ever heard about this? You've seen this? Ah fucking

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Speaker 1: in the old airplane? Yes, in the old airplane. Yes.

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Speaker 1: Uh So there's apparently a hot air balloon that is

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Speaker 1: allowing you to join the Mile High Club because I

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Speaker 1: guess the airline industry is too scared and so this

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Speaker 1: hot air balloon company will take you up so you

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Speaker 1: can make those.

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Speaker 2: The don't ask, don't tell policy of American airlines not

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Speaker 2: good enough for thank you permission.

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Speaker 1: Oh my god. It is such a weird, Like I

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Speaker 1: want an official ticket on an official certificate that said

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Speaker 1: I did this. I this sounds way more unnerving to

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Speaker 1: me than the airplane. It's like they took a problem

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Speaker 1: nobody was having with the idea of, like, you know,

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Speaker 1: joining the Mile High Club. It's just like a dumb

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Speaker 1: thing that I think appeals to Like I guess like

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Speaker 1: teenagers before they've had sex, is what I feel like

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Speaker 1: it is. It's like, oh, that would be sick, and

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Speaker 1: then you have sex and I'm like, no, that would

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Speaker 1: be very uncomfortable. I prefer a bed. But right this, Yeah,

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Speaker 1: they're like, all right, so everybody wants to join the

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Speaker 1: mile High Club, but it doesn't like swing around enough

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Speaker 1: and it's not freezing cold when you do it. How

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Speaker 1: do we fix that? And also I had never really

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Speaker 1: thought about I've never been in a hot air balloon.

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Speaker 1: Have you ever been? No? No? And I think about

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Speaker 1: it all that it makes me sad, that so horny. Yeah. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: but Brian the editor was talking about how the idea

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Speaker 1: of being in a hot air balloon and looking up

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Speaker 1: into the hot air balloon and seeing nothing and you're

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Speaker 1: like a mile high would be terrifying. I'd never really

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Speaker 1: thought about that, but that would freak me the fuck out.

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Speaker 2: The scariest thing to me is that I'd try to

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Speaker 2: fuck the balloon. It's my it's just see this big

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Speaker 2: billowy pillowy.

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Speaker 1: Yeah. I have to stop talking about it right now.

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Speaker 1: That was That was also my concern with you when

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Speaker 1: I asked if you'd been up in a hot air balloon.

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Speaker 1: It was mostly out of concern for you and the

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Speaker 1: other people on the hot air.

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Speaker 2: But you said, have you been all up in it hot?

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Speaker 2: And no, God willing, God willing.

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Speaker 1: Yeah. Also, you'd be in there with a hot air

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Speaker 1: balloon pilot whose job it is to like take you

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Speaker 1: up there and like not look over at you. Which

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Speaker 1: part of it that license? Yeah?

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I think that would have to be. It's also

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Speaker 2: like six dollars, like it's not that expensive.

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Speaker 1: Fair.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I guess I have it in my pocket. We

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Speaker 2: don't have to do it. We can just go up

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Speaker 2: in the thing.

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Speaker 1: I just go up and like Jack off while you

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Speaker 1: turn around or is that what?

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Speaker 2: What?

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Speaker 1: What? What's what's allowed here? Sorry, my lovely lady couldn't

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Speaker 1: make it. Oh no, I've just been informed the show's

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Speaker 1: canceled ureak. Sorry, we'll figure out how to run back together.

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Speaker 1: We'll be right back and we're back and a lot

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Speaker 1: of asteroid news. This is, I guess, another of stroid Watch.

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Speaker 1: You know, in the traditional bloid watch where we used

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Speaker 1: to look at tabloids in the early days of the podcast.

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Speaker 1: This is, of course stroid Watch, where we cover asteroid news.

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Speaker 2: We explained that a little bit better for the people

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Speaker 2: so they can actually understand what you're talking about. No,

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Speaker 2: I think you did.

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Speaker 1: I did. I didn't great, I seceeded the tabloid. Anyways,

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Speaker 1: the scientist went up to an asteroid, got a sample,

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Speaker 1: and flew back. And so, I guess one of the

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Speaker 1: problems that we had with knowing what is up there

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Speaker 1: in outer space is that a lot of the asteroids

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Speaker 1: that reach us had to like enter through our atmosphere,

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Speaker 1: catch on fire, burnt up, it's a met They're messy

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Speaker 1: as fuck by the time they land on the planet.

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Speaker 1: So they had to go out there, land on an asteroid,

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Speaker 1: take some soil samples come back. This happened last year.

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Speaker 1: They're just now kind of publishing what they found, and

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Speaker 1: they think that this asteroid was a piece of one

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Speaker 1: of the planets that existed in the early formation of

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Speaker 1: the Solar System, where there was just like too many planets.

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Speaker 1: It was like a pool table right after you like

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Speaker 1: break the billiard balls of just just like these fucking

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Speaker 1: planets were just like crashing into each other. So this

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Speaker 1: is the one that got crashed into and is now

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Speaker 1: just you know, millions of different chunks of rock out there.

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Speaker 1: So they decided to go up see what these early

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Speaker 1: planets looked like, and they found like exactly what they

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Speaker 1: were looking for, which is like a lot of organic

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Speaker 1: compounds and a lot of the ingredients, amino acids, nucleotide bases,

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Speaker 1: basically all the things that are necessary for life on Earth.

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Speaker 1: And so they're just like, oh, life is probably everywhere,

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Speaker 1: is what we're discovered. My theory is always like we're

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Speaker 1: going to discover life and like maybe advanced civilization, but

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Speaker 1: it just like won't still be alive. It'll be like

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Speaker 1: evidence of like a past one. Because but I think

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Speaker 1: like this indicates that there's just the possibility for life everywhere.

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Speaker 1: It's just you know, this planet crashed and was like

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Speaker 1: smashed into smithereens scientific term, you know, millions of years

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Speaker 1: ago or however many years ago, so of.

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Speaker 2: Metric smithereens smashing too exactly. But yeah, so I don't know.

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Speaker 2: I find this really intriguing, like that all the ingredients

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Speaker 2: were there in our Solar system, like on other planets

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Speaker 2: that just like you know, crash crashed out a number

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Speaker 2: of years ago, and I still hold out hope that

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Speaker 2: we'll encounter intelligent life. Yeah, I find this news story intriguing.

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Speaker 2: It is intriguing. I think that's just so what we

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Speaker 2: would deserve as a human race too, is not be

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Speaker 2: able to meet any of these things, you know, any

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Speaker 2: of the intelligent life. It's like, listen, we found a

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Speaker 2: frozen dead cat on an asteroid and it had a virus,

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Speaker 2: and we're all gonna get that virus. You don't get

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Speaker 2: to pet the cat. The cat is so fucked looking.

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Speaker 2: You don't even get to.

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Speaker 1: Imagine what the cat look like because it don't get

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Speaker 1: give you. The virus is transmitted visually visual visually. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: so we have it, I have it, You'll get it.

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Speaker 2: And yeah, it's it's just that's so interesting where I

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Speaker 2: think everybody holds out the hope if they want this,

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Speaker 2: but for ah, we'll see the man. The man will

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Speaker 2: come in their ship or whatever, and it's like, no,

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Speaker 2: I think we might at best see you like a

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Speaker 2: like a clam, you know, a dead clam. I think

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Speaker 2: that that's what it's gonna be, slam that existed a

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Speaker 2: billion years ago on some other planet that has since

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Speaker 2: been destroyed. Would that excite you seeing that? Like, I

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Speaker 2: know that's a silly question, but I.

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Speaker 1: Mean I think it's similar to what this is, which

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Speaker 1: is like this is kind of a set like probabilistically,

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Speaker 1: like this is like oh life. Definitely there are dead

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Speaker 1: clams on space rocks floating around out there everywhere. Probably

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Speaker 1: this has all the ingredients they just like haven't been

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Speaker 1: put together properly yet on this very specific one that

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Speaker 1: exists in our very specific solar system. Yeah, but I

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Speaker 1: mean more that like we're going to find out that

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Speaker 1: Star Wars is a true story that happened a long

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Speaker 1: long time ago. Yeah, too far far away. No for

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Speaker 1: the questions, Blake, Okay, all right, hey, speaking of Star Wars,

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Speaker 1: that's a movie and uh so this is this is

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Speaker 1: a movie we've had our eye on from Daniel Kluia,

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Speaker 1: who one of our one of our great actors, has

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Speaker 1: been talking about this movie is producing about Barney the Dinosaur. Weird.

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Speaker 1: You know, he's like he had won the Academy Award

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Speaker 1: or was he nominated or won for Judas in The

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Speaker 1: Black Messiah, and this was like kind of the thing

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Speaker 1: that came out that he was like, this is what

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Speaker 1: I really want to work on, and specifically this quote

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Speaker 1: he said, Barney taught us I love you, you love me?

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Speaker 1: Won't you say you love me too? That's one of

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Speaker 1: the first songs I remember? And what happens when that

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Speaker 1: isn't true? I thought that was really heartbreaking. I have

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Speaker 1: no idea why, but it feels like that makes sense.

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Speaker 1: It feels like there's something unexpected that can be poignant

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Speaker 1: but optimistic, especially at this time now, I think that's

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Speaker 1: really really needy. So it's like there's a there's a

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Speaker 1: Barney movie coming about what if Barney didn't actually love you?

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Speaker 1: What if Barnie like Neaggie. It's just like such a

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Speaker 1: weird combination of idea and like subject matter, and then

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Speaker 1: you know there were reports that Mattel Films was like

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Speaker 1: making it, and that the Barney movie would be inspired

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Speaker 1: by the works of Charlie Kaufman and Spike Jones, focus

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Speaker 1: on millennial angst, that it would be a eighth twenty

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Speaker 1: four type artouse film, and so all very exciting, and

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Speaker 1: then the CEO of Mattel was like, wait a second, No,

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Speaker 1: don't get any ideas. This will not be an odd movie.

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Speaker 1: Speticularly said, yeah, this.

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Speaker 2: Isn't gonna be one of those weirdo movies for weirdos.

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Speaker 2: It's what if mister Rogers was a Dallas cowboy fan, Like,

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Speaker 2: I don't know why we have to ruin these nice

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Speaker 2: This is not the right time to ruin a sweet arnee,

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Speaker 2: a sweet thing. We need sweet things. We need more

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Speaker 2: Paddington's is what we need. We need eight more Paddington's

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Speaker 2: during this presidency. It's Paddington a week. Yeah, we need

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Speaker 2: to leave one Paddington, one full feature length Paddington per

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Speaker 2: week to get through this shit. The Popeye movie that

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Speaker 2: you showed me on this show was traumatizing enough.

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Speaker 1: I don't think they're doing that with Barney personally. I

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Speaker 1: think I think they're just sad. I think it's gonna

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Speaker 1: be like sad but hopeful and heartbreaking. I mean his

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Speaker 1: statement that it's like in times like these we need

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Speaker 1: that sort of heartbreaking sweetness like that makes me think

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Speaker 1: it's that and not like what if Barney an ar

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Speaker 1: fourteen Barney was the last of his species and fighting

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Speaker 1: versus destroid. Yeah, but so.

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Speaker 2: But it will be This is a little bit of

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Speaker 2: it's not gonna be an odd movie. It might be odd,

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Speaker 2: but I don't I don't expect it to be depressing necessarily.

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Speaker 2: It is now being reported that ao adeboats from the

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Speaker 2: Bear and you know, comedy, all things comedy, one of

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Speaker 2: the greats Will is going to write and possibly star

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Speaker 2: in the Barney movie. Exciting enough, And it's not just

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Speaker 2: a a twenty four type movie. It's actually being made

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Speaker 2: with a twenty four now, So.

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Speaker 1: I think that's fun. I think that is a good

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Speaker 1: piece of a little good piece of news, a little

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Speaker 1: more little good news we can all put in our

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Speaker 1: little pipes and smoke them. I agree. I trust for

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Speaker 1: the trust Aoh yeah, me too. I think that would

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Speaker 1: be cool. So just an update on an old story

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Speaker 1: for some old friends, Blake, where can they find you,

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Speaker 1: you son of a bitch.

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Speaker 2: They can find me at say that about on all

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Speaker 2: social media, you bastard. And then you can also see

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Speaker 2: me doing stand up live in Fort Collins, Colorado, March thirteenth.

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Speaker 2: March fifteenth, This is a big show. It's going to

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Speaker 2: be in Los Angeles at the ice House Comedy Club

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Speaker 2: in Pasadena.

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Speaker 1: Would love to see you there.

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Speaker 2: And then April fourth through fifth Sissyphus in Minneapolis, and

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Speaker 2: please grab those tickets while you can in my bio,

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Speaker 2: on social media and wherever you get comedy tickets.

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Speaker 1: When is it again in March fourteenth in Los Angeles, Pasadena.

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Speaker 2: March fifteenth, Saturday, March fifteenth, seven pm, The ice House

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Speaker 2: in Pasadena.

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Speaker 1: The ice House, The ice House, It's amazing. March. That's

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Speaker 1: mark Saturday pm, Ice House, Pasadena. Uh, March, everybody, get

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Speaker 1: out there. Thanks, Just show them the Gang cares and

408
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Speaker 1: also just go because it's really gonna be very funny.

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Speaker 1: That's gonna do it for us this afternoon. We are

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Speaker 1: back tomorrow with the whole last episode of the show.

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Speaker 1: Until then, be kind to each other, be kind to yourselves.

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Speaker 1: Get your vaccines way still can't get your flu shot.

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Speaker 1: That's particularly bad this year. Don't do nothing about white supremacy,

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Speaker 1: and we will talk to you all tomorrow. Bye.