1 00:00:00,120 --> 00:00:02,640 Speaker 1: What is the mini retirement update? How's it going? Is? It? 2 00:00:02,880 --> 00:00:03,520 Speaker 1: Has it started? 3 00:00:03,840 --> 00:00:07,200 Speaker 2: So it's gonna look a little bit different and it's 4 00:00:07,280 --> 00:00:09,959 Speaker 2: not as like planned out as I thought it would 5 00:00:10,000 --> 00:00:12,680 Speaker 2: be by this point, but it's all coming together. Everything 6 00:00:12,760 --> 00:00:15,520 Speaker 2: is fallen into place, and I'm just excited for what's 7 00:00:15,560 --> 00:00:15,920 Speaker 2: to come. 8 00:00:16,560 --> 00:00:26,759 Speaker 1: I think that's a word. Especially as moms, we're so unfree. Hey, 9 00:00:26,760 --> 00:00:29,760 Speaker 1: ba fan, welcome to the Brown table, Welcome to Brown Ambition. 10 00:00:31,760 --> 00:00:34,960 Speaker 1: I have the beautiful, the stunning Nasima McElroy here with 11 00:00:35,080 --> 00:00:38,960 Speaker 1: me financially intentional. If you're not already following her on ig, 12 00:00:39,120 --> 00:00:41,919 Speaker 1: I'm not sure what you're waiting for. That's your main channel, right, 13 00:00:41,920 --> 00:00:45,040 Speaker 1: Are you also TikTok famous? I'm I'm not a TikToker, 14 00:00:45,400 --> 00:00:47,600 Speaker 1: not yet. I need to, I need to. But yeah, 15 00:00:47,640 --> 00:00:49,280 Speaker 1: it's a lot to man. If they would just be 16 00:00:49,400 --> 00:00:52,040 Speaker 1: friends and you could upload one thing there and then both, 17 00:00:52,080 --> 00:00:54,320 Speaker 1: but they're both. It's two, they're two petties. It's a 18 00:00:54,400 --> 00:00:58,840 Speaker 1: whole different a whole different universe over there. Yeah, but 19 00:00:58,960 --> 00:01:02,440 Speaker 1: I'm so grateful. We both just got back for some travel. 20 00:01:03,960 --> 00:01:06,360 Speaker 1: I think your trip was probably more beautiful than mine. 21 00:01:06,600 --> 00:01:09,760 Speaker 1: But you tell me you were at Lake Tahoe. Yes, 22 00:01:10,040 --> 00:01:12,960 Speaker 1: it was. It was actually pretty beautiful with serene. 23 00:01:13,000 --> 00:01:16,800 Speaker 2: It was like hot and I don't know, like most 24 00:01:16,800 --> 00:01:19,480 Speaker 2: people don't know like Lake Tahoe facts, but it's so 25 00:01:19,720 --> 00:01:22,760 Speaker 2: deep that the water never really warms up, like it's 26 00:01:22,840 --> 00:01:24,320 Speaker 2: always super cold. 27 00:01:25,440 --> 00:01:26,200 Speaker 1: But because of. 28 00:01:26,160 --> 00:01:32,160 Speaker 2: Global warming, it was kind of tolerable enough that you 29 00:01:32,200 --> 00:01:34,280 Speaker 2: can kind of get into get in it. So we 30 00:01:34,360 --> 00:01:35,800 Speaker 2: had a good time out there. And I have a 31 00:01:35,840 --> 00:01:39,920 Speaker 2: really good friend who is actually in the personal finance community. 32 00:01:39,920 --> 00:01:41,880 Speaker 2: Her name is Lisa Peterson. She wrote the book The 33 00:01:41,920 --> 00:01:46,640 Speaker 2: Mindful Millionaire. Her daughter has a house out there, and 34 00:01:46,680 --> 00:01:51,600 Speaker 2: her daughter has like this crazy social media following she's 35 00:01:52,560 --> 00:01:56,800 Speaker 2: called the adventure Addicts. And so yeah, her daughter was 36 00:01:56,840 --> 00:01:58,880 Speaker 2: able to buy a house in Lake Tahoe. But I've 37 00:01:58,920 --> 00:02:02,600 Speaker 2: been knowing her since her was like still in college, 38 00:02:02,600 --> 00:02:05,400 Speaker 2: and so to be able to watch their journey and 39 00:02:05,440 --> 00:02:08,040 Speaker 2: then to be able to like go and share and 40 00:02:08,200 --> 00:02:10,320 Speaker 2: all that stuff was like beautiful. And it's like she's 41 00:02:10,360 --> 00:02:11,720 Speaker 2: one of the kind of people that I look to 42 00:02:11,840 --> 00:02:16,359 Speaker 2: for like parenting advice. So it was great. We had 43 00:02:16,360 --> 00:02:19,120 Speaker 2: a good Yeah. 44 00:02:18,360 --> 00:02:21,320 Speaker 1: So she gets so her daughter hosted that's crazy to 45 00:02:21,360 --> 00:02:23,360 Speaker 1: think one day My best was one of my good friends. 46 00:02:23,400 --> 00:02:27,280 Speaker 1: Their kid may host me at their house, her daughters 47 00:02:27,360 --> 00:02:28,040 Speaker 1: in her. 48 00:02:29,400 --> 00:02:32,840 Speaker 2: And so she was house sitting and so you know, 49 00:02:33,000 --> 00:02:35,880 Speaker 2: we got to enjoy the fruits of her labor. 50 00:02:37,160 --> 00:02:39,359 Speaker 1: I love that even more because then you can get 51 00:02:39,400 --> 00:02:41,240 Speaker 1: up to no good and you don't have like the 52 00:02:41,320 --> 00:02:44,440 Speaker 1: kid whose diapers used to change there watching you get 53 00:02:44,560 --> 00:02:48,000 Speaker 1: drunk two in them afternoon for just me. 54 00:02:49,960 --> 00:02:51,720 Speaker 2: But it was it was great. It was a lovely 55 00:02:51,800 --> 00:02:55,160 Speaker 2: experience and just oh my goodness, the nature, the whole 56 00:02:55,160 --> 00:02:58,440 Speaker 2: familion and all the kids. They really enjoyed themselves. And 57 00:02:58,880 --> 00:03:01,680 Speaker 2: we actually used to live around that area. Well we 58 00:03:01,800 --> 00:03:04,200 Speaker 2: used to live around like Tahoe as well, but on 59 00:03:04,240 --> 00:03:06,200 Speaker 2: in other parts. We had never been to that side, 60 00:03:06,280 --> 00:03:09,000 Speaker 2: so it was a good experience. They but they don't 61 00:03:09,040 --> 00:03:09,960 Speaker 2: really remember it. 62 00:03:11,120 --> 00:03:14,080 Speaker 1: Who yeah, oh ok. 63 00:03:14,240 --> 00:03:18,360 Speaker 2: Yeah, Like this one was born there and she's like, 64 00:03:18,400 --> 00:03:20,280 Speaker 2: I want to go back and I want to live there, 65 00:03:20,320 --> 00:03:21,000 Speaker 2: and I'm just like. 66 00:03:21,040 --> 00:03:24,440 Speaker 1: You don't even like remember what it was like, but 67 00:03:24,520 --> 00:03:27,240 Speaker 1: you can't tell her that. So well, I love that. 68 00:03:27,960 --> 00:03:28,160 Speaker 2: Yeah. 69 00:03:28,320 --> 00:03:30,200 Speaker 1: Well, the last time you were on the show. It's 70 00:03:30,200 --> 00:03:32,280 Speaker 1: been a couple of months since you and you Elli 71 00:03:32,280 --> 00:03:34,680 Speaker 1: were on the show, so we were soft launching a 72 00:03:34,760 --> 00:03:38,440 Speaker 1: Boo and we were hard launching many retirement. I want 73 00:03:38,520 --> 00:03:40,880 Speaker 1: updates on both, which one, which one we're doing? We 74 00:03:40,880 --> 00:03:42,720 Speaker 1: can play it cute and skip the boo. We can 75 00:03:42,760 --> 00:03:43,640 Speaker 1: go then retirement. 76 00:03:45,920 --> 00:03:50,880 Speaker 2: Oh, listen, the boo situation is situationing like it's great. 77 00:03:52,200 --> 00:03:56,040 Speaker 1: Oh, I don't know why I got worried. You're playing 78 00:03:56,040 --> 00:04:01,560 Speaker 1: it too cool. Yeah, it's We're good. That's going well. 79 00:04:02,200 --> 00:04:06,760 Speaker 2: Yeah, you'll see I think you'll see more of that 80 00:04:06,880 --> 00:04:08,000 Speaker 2: situation play out. 81 00:04:08,160 --> 00:04:10,000 Speaker 1: So I've been gone for a week though. So my 82 00:04:10,080 --> 00:04:12,120 Speaker 1: trip was I went to Atlanta. I was in Atlanta 83 00:04:12,120 --> 00:04:14,760 Speaker 1: four oh yes, yes, yes, eight days with me and 84 00:04:14,840 --> 00:04:17,800 Speaker 1: Remi ru. My dad just had a kidney transplant, and 85 00:04:17,880 --> 00:04:21,159 Speaker 1: I was there to shuttle him from appointments and just 86 00:04:21,160 --> 00:04:23,560 Speaker 1: just like have eyes on the eagle because that man 87 00:04:23,640 --> 00:04:28,279 Speaker 1: cannot be trusted, especially not with no new organ in 88 00:04:28,320 --> 00:04:32,320 Speaker 1: his body, and to babysit him basically while my brother 89 00:04:32,360 --> 00:04:36,080 Speaker 1: was out of town. But while I was gone, my 90 00:04:36,120 --> 00:04:37,960 Speaker 1: five year old and my husband were here to their 91 00:04:37,960 --> 00:04:42,479 Speaker 1: own devices. And I had really had to let go 92 00:04:42,560 --> 00:04:45,440 Speaker 1: and let God because I knew I'd be coming back 93 00:04:45,480 --> 00:04:49,240 Speaker 1: to all of my beautiful systems being destroyed. I knew 94 00:04:49,240 --> 00:04:52,159 Speaker 1: that I knew bedtime was a rap. I knew bathtime 95 00:04:52,400 --> 00:04:56,160 Speaker 1: maybe once or twice once. Let's not talk about it. 96 00:04:58,040 --> 00:05:00,960 Speaker 1: When he when when real jumped in my arms at 97 00:05:01,000 --> 00:05:04,320 Speaker 1: the airport. I mean he smelled okay, but his hair, oh, 98 00:05:04,520 --> 00:05:07,920 Speaker 1: oh my god, the hair was neglected. The curls were sad, 99 00:05:08,400 --> 00:05:12,080 Speaker 1: they were it was giving. I mean, all hair texture 100 00:05:12,120 --> 00:05:15,760 Speaker 1: is beautiful, but it was giving like straw, you know, 101 00:05:16,320 --> 00:05:18,520 Speaker 1: like he clearly had not been bathed or his hair 102 00:05:18,520 --> 00:05:21,440 Speaker 1: had not been washed and moisturized since pool day last Tuesday, 103 00:05:21,760 --> 00:05:25,680 Speaker 1: okay and pool day, Oh god, oh my god, I 104 00:05:25,680 --> 00:05:30,120 Speaker 1: don't know. I can't even but I got back yesterday 105 00:05:30,160 --> 00:05:35,200 Speaker 1: and I am slowly just piecing this house back together 106 00:05:35,560 --> 00:05:38,320 Speaker 1: to uh, did you at least get to see biance again? 107 00:05:45,320 --> 00:05:48,599 Speaker 1: Oh my god, on my mouth, my voice back down 108 00:05:48,640 --> 00:05:51,400 Speaker 1: to we're jumping all over the place. This is very 109 00:05:51,400 --> 00:05:57,960 Speaker 1: adhd of me. Undiagnosed, very much undignosed, diagnosed. I'm very diagnosed. 110 00:05:59,080 --> 00:06:02,719 Speaker 1: Oh my god, I see Beyonce again. Yes I did, 111 00:06:03,200 --> 00:06:06,640 Speaker 1: And it was the best decision I ever made. I 112 00:06:07,120 --> 00:06:10,600 Speaker 1: haven't felt that way about spending money like where since 113 00:06:10,640 --> 00:06:12,440 Speaker 1: my wedding. Really, Like I can think of a couple 114 00:06:12,480 --> 00:06:14,279 Speaker 1: things that have I have been like, oh, that was 115 00:06:14,279 --> 00:06:19,400 Speaker 1: worth every overpriced dollar my wedding, because that was a time, beautiful, stunning, 116 00:06:19,400 --> 00:06:21,800 Speaker 1: ten out of ten. I love it and going to 117 00:06:21,800 --> 00:06:25,920 Speaker 1: see Beyonce, I'm never not getting fed. Like I'm leaving 118 00:06:25,960 --> 00:06:28,440 Speaker 1: there full if you're open, like if you go with 119 00:06:28,480 --> 00:06:30,159 Speaker 1: the right mindset, if you go to like have a 120 00:06:30,160 --> 00:06:32,320 Speaker 1: good time, because I don't know. I was sitting next 121 00:06:32,320 --> 00:06:35,520 Speaker 1: to people when Atlanta who were just sat there like 122 00:06:35,760 --> 00:06:38,160 Speaker 1: where I was in the floor seats, but they literally 123 00:06:38,279 --> 00:06:40,719 Speaker 1: just wanted to sit in their seats. Yeah, and Atlanta 124 00:06:40,880 --> 00:06:44,640 Speaker 1: I was so confused, interesting and weren't singing and screaming 125 00:06:44,680 --> 00:06:48,320 Speaker 1: every song. And I'm like the way I come out 126 00:06:48,360 --> 00:06:50,440 Speaker 1: of my own body when I'm at a Beyonce show, 127 00:06:50,520 --> 00:06:54,520 Speaker 1: i am just like feral. I am singing every lyric, 128 00:06:54,839 --> 00:06:57,520 Speaker 1: I am talking to her through the songs. I am 129 00:06:57,720 --> 00:07:02,360 Speaker 1: losing my voice. But it was such a good use 130 00:07:02,400 --> 00:07:05,720 Speaker 1: of money. I just I love money so much. I 131 00:07:05,760 --> 00:07:07,520 Speaker 1: love it so much because it gives me that kind 132 00:07:07,560 --> 00:07:11,840 Speaker 1: of experience. And I went by myself, which was very 133 00:07:11,880 --> 00:07:17,040 Speaker 1: grown woman. That is very grown. I did have a 134 00:07:17,080 --> 00:07:19,840 Speaker 1: bit of drama though I shared this on Yeah, I 135 00:07:19,920 --> 00:07:21,720 Speaker 1: was so under it because like the last thing I 136 00:07:21,760 --> 00:07:24,560 Speaker 1: saw like it was like your tickets wasn't right. And 137 00:07:24,600 --> 00:07:27,800 Speaker 1: then so I bought the ticket because when I booked 138 00:07:27,840 --> 00:07:29,680 Speaker 1: my trip to Georgia, it was only a few weeks ago, 139 00:07:30,120 --> 00:07:34,080 Speaker 1: and I mean I was I wasn't going. It wasn't 140 00:07:34,120 --> 00:07:35,560 Speaker 1: the point of my trip. My point was to be 141 00:07:35,560 --> 00:07:37,960 Speaker 1: there for Dad. I stayed a lot longer than I 142 00:07:38,040 --> 00:07:41,480 Speaker 1: might have if Beyonce hadn't been in town that weekend. 143 00:07:42,000 --> 00:07:44,600 Speaker 1: I was like the volunteers Tribute, I'll take care of dad. Yes, 144 00:07:44,640 --> 00:07:48,200 Speaker 1: I'm the best daughter ever. Meanwhile, me get on StubHub 145 00:07:48,920 --> 00:07:51,560 Speaker 1: and I don't know why I didn't just go to Ticketmaster. 146 00:07:51,680 --> 00:07:53,560 Speaker 1: I forget how I ended up on StubHub. I have 147 00:07:53,600 --> 00:07:57,520 Speaker 1: bought tickets on StubHub before. I don't remember it being 148 00:07:57,640 --> 00:08:00,240 Speaker 1: a situation where you didn't get your tickets immediately and 149 00:08:00,280 --> 00:08:03,000 Speaker 1: you had to wait. And because of that, I bought 150 00:08:03,040 --> 00:08:06,000 Speaker 1: the tickets. They were like five hundred dollars made about 151 00:08:06,040 --> 00:08:09,160 Speaker 1: a ticket five hundred bucks, and I bought the ticket 152 00:08:09,280 --> 00:08:12,320 Speaker 1: I wanted I have been. I just saw her in London, 153 00:08:12,800 --> 00:08:16,080 Speaker 1: me and my friend. We we were standing in the 154 00:08:16,520 --> 00:08:19,920 Speaker 1: honeybuck and pit on the side of the stage, so 155 00:08:20,160 --> 00:08:22,080 Speaker 1: close you know, next to the fans that are blowing 156 00:08:22,080 --> 00:08:24,400 Speaker 1: in her. It was an amazing experience. But I wanted 157 00:08:24,440 --> 00:08:26,640 Speaker 1: to be more. I wanted to be center. I wanted 158 00:08:26,680 --> 00:08:28,520 Speaker 1: to be further out so I can see the whole stage. 159 00:08:29,080 --> 00:08:31,080 Speaker 1: And I had a very specific idea of where I 160 00:08:31,120 --> 00:08:33,840 Speaker 1: wanted to sit. So that's why I bought that ticket. Okay, 161 00:08:34,400 --> 00:08:38,320 Speaker 1: it wastenchional. Also it was a damn good deal. It 162 00:08:38,400 --> 00:08:40,760 Speaker 1: was the front row of a floor section because I 163 00:08:40,760 --> 00:08:42,480 Speaker 1: don't like being on the floor because you got people's 164 00:08:42,480 --> 00:08:44,839 Speaker 1: big ass heads in front of you and you're all 165 00:08:44,880 --> 00:08:47,319 Speaker 1: on the same level. And even though I'm tall, I 166 00:08:47,360 --> 00:08:49,200 Speaker 1: knew people going to be wearing hats like we're doing 167 00:08:49,240 --> 00:08:52,720 Speaker 1: the most. I wanted to be front row. The morning 168 00:08:52,760 --> 00:08:55,360 Speaker 1: of the show, I got an email from stub Hub. Well, 169 00:08:55,360 --> 00:08:57,400 Speaker 1: first I got a phone call. I'm getting ready for church, 170 00:08:57,400 --> 00:09:01,360 Speaker 1: taking ready to church, And I got a phone call 171 00:09:01,440 --> 00:09:02,920 Speaker 1: and I was ignoring it because it was like an 172 00:09:02,920 --> 00:09:05,400 Speaker 1: eight seven seven number. And then I got the voicemail. 173 00:09:05,800 --> 00:09:07,560 Speaker 1: It was like, we're calling from stub Hub. The seller 174 00:09:07,600 --> 00:09:13,440 Speaker 1: has had issues, has had issues transferring your tickets. Maybe 175 00:09:13,640 --> 00:09:19,000 Speaker 1: they didn't have a ticket mmm mm hmm. I was 176 00:09:19,040 --> 00:09:20,679 Speaker 1: so confused. I'm like, what do you need my ticket? 177 00:09:20,720 --> 00:09:23,240 Speaker 1: I don't I already have it? No, woman, I didn't 178 00:09:23,240 --> 00:09:26,120 Speaker 1: already have the ticket. I was supposed to have it 179 00:09:26,160 --> 00:09:28,280 Speaker 1: transferred to me, but I was so used to just 180 00:09:28,320 --> 00:09:29,960 Speaker 1: buying a ticket and having it that I didn't like 181 00:09:30,040 --> 00:09:32,800 Speaker 1: read the email carefully when I got it. So I 182 00:09:32,880 --> 00:09:36,880 Speaker 1: was on the phone with stub Hub and they basically 183 00:09:36,920 --> 00:09:39,840 Speaker 1: said that that ticket was no longer available, which I 184 00:09:39,880 --> 00:09:41,920 Speaker 1: was in denial because how could it no longer be available? 185 00:09:41,920 --> 00:09:44,880 Speaker 1: I paid for it they and their system is that 186 00:09:44,920 --> 00:09:47,320 Speaker 1: they send you a link to alternative choices. So the 187 00:09:47,400 --> 00:09:51,240 Speaker 1: seller who was clearly some like ticket, you know, ticket, 188 00:09:52,080 --> 00:09:56,640 Speaker 1: not as I guess, a scalper galpar yeah, not a 189 00:09:56,800 --> 00:09:58,800 Speaker 1: scam per se because I was going to get a 190 00:09:58,800 --> 00:10:02,880 Speaker 1: ticket apparently, but a bait and switch happened. So clearly 191 00:10:02,920 --> 00:10:06,839 Speaker 1: he had sold my cut my ticket available and sold 192 00:10:06,840 --> 00:10:08,640 Speaker 1: it for a higher price the day of the show, 193 00:10:09,440 --> 00:10:11,880 Speaker 1: So it was no longer available to me, but he 194 00:10:12,120 --> 00:10:14,320 Speaker 1: was offering me and I'm saying he, They said he, 195 00:10:14,360 --> 00:10:15,280 Speaker 1: And I was like, how do you know who this 196 00:10:15,320 --> 00:10:17,319 Speaker 1: person is? They were on the phone with him apparently 197 00:10:18,000 --> 00:10:20,360 Speaker 1: on the other line, and he had I had a 198 00:10:20,360 --> 00:10:23,400 Speaker 1: couple of options from him available that were like they 199 00:10:23,440 --> 00:10:27,720 Speaker 1: were staged right bound off to the side on the floor, 200 00:10:27,720 --> 00:10:29,360 Speaker 1: but off to the side, and I'm like, no, I 201 00:10:29,400 --> 00:10:31,720 Speaker 1: wanted to this matters to me. I want to be 202 00:10:31,960 --> 00:10:34,800 Speaker 1: dead center. I want to see I want to see 203 00:10:34,840 --> 00:10:38,439 Speaker 1: everything from this viewpoint. And I was really upset and 204 00:10:38,559 --> 00:10:41,600 Speaker 1: I was kind of like disassociated from it because I'm 205 00:10:41,640 --> 00:10:43,199 Speaker 1: taking care of two babies at this point and got 206 00:10:43,200 --> 00:10:45,600 Speaker 1: my dad and I got my actual baby, and We're 207 00:10:45,640 --> 00:10:48,640 Speaker 1: trying to get to church and anything. And I was like, 208 00:10:48,720 --> 00:10:51,200 Speaker 1: you know what, I'm just gonna I'm gonna I'm going 209 00:10:51,280 --> 00:10:53,840 Speaker 1: to decline the alternative that he offered, and I'm going 210 00:10:53,920 --> 00:10:56,400 Speaker 1: to tell stub Hub exactly what I want. I was like, 211 00:10:56,440 --> 00:10:59,040 Speaker 1: I want to be center. I don't want anything else. 212 00:11:00,400 --> 00:11:03,959 Speaker 1: And then we went to church, and three hours later, 213 00:11:04,280 --> 00:11:10,360 Speaker 1: feah hours later, I oh gotta love church. Three hours later, 214 00:11:10,600 --> 00:11:12,680 Speaker 1: I had to claw my way out of that church 215 00:11:12,720 --> 00:11:15,080 Speaker 1: because you know, they had two people manning the door 216 00:11:15,120 --> 00:11:17,760 Speaker 1: to black people from leaving. I haven't meant to church 217 00:11:17,800 --> 00:11:20,080 Speaker 1: in a long time, let alone, like this is my 218 00:11:20,880 --> 00:11:24,000 Speaker 1: two people at the door. Oh sorry, sorry, no one 219 00:11:24,040 --> 00:11:26,920 Speaker 1: can leave. All pastors praying. I'm like pastor's been praying. 220 00:11:27,840 --> 00:11:31,120 Speaker 1: I mean no disrespect. First of all, I'm a heathen. 221 00:11:31,160 --> 00:11:34,720 Speaker 1: I haven't been a church in forever. But meanwhile, I 222 00:11:34,800 --> 00:11:37,080 Speaker 1: have my roots are in the Black Baptist Church. Like 223 00:11:37,640 --> 00:11:42,120 Speaker 1: I'm a Southern Baptist girl, and my aunt Brenda, my 224 00:11:42,280 --> 00:11:45,520 Speaker 1: uncle uncle Chrystley, Uncle Booby call him, they're both like 225 00:11:45,600 --> 00:11:49,880 Speaker 1: assistant pastors at this really, you know, humble, What other 226 00:11:49,880 --> 00:11:53,600 Speaker 1: way can I describe it? Humble? Classic Black Baptist church, 227 00:11:53,760 --> 00:11:57,680 Speaker 1: like in the heart of Atlanta, and you know, like, 228 00:11:57,840 --> 00:11:59,640 Speaker 1: is the ac gonna work today? We don't know. I 229 00:11:59,679 --> 00:12:01,559 Speaker 1: may or. I dressed light, I brought ice water. I 230 00:12:02,200 --> 00:12:05,960 Speaker 1: was like, I'm hydrating, Like I know, I pretty much 231 00:12:05,960 --> 00:12:08,199 Speaker 1: know what to expect, but I haven't actually been to 232 00:12:08,240 --> 00:12:11,760 Speaker 1: the church, despite trying for a while. So me and 233 00:12:11,800 --> 00:12:13,680 Speaker 1: Remy and I should have known better because my dad 234 00:12:13,720 --> 00:12:15,200 Speaker 1: was like, I'm dropping y'all off. I'm gonna go get 235 00:12:15,200 --> 00:12:18,240 Speaker 1: a haircut. I'll see y'all later. I was like, Daddy, 236 00:12:18,280 --> 00:12:19,599 Speaker 1: you don't want to come to church, like, may be 237 00:12:19,720 --> 00:12:22,120 Speaker 1: part of that right now. I'm like, nah, I'm good, 238 00:12:22,400 --> 00:12:29,560 Speaker 1: see y'all later. Bye. Ran for it. But it was 239 00:12:29,720 --> 00:12:33,160 Speaker 1: it was actually a really beautiful experience. But two and 240 00:12:33,240 --> 00:12:36,439 Speaker 1: a half hours in, I was about done. I felt bad. 241 00:12:37,200 --> 00:12:41,640 Speaker 1: My friend and I had to get up out of there. 242 00:12:42,120 --> 00:12:44,240 Speaker 1: I have a two year old, he's hungry. I'm hungry. 243 00:12:44,320 --> 00:12:46,640 Speaker 1: I got and I wasn't going to tell them because 244 00:12:46,640 --> 00:12:48,679 Speaker 1: I don't want to know. And I worshiped a fal 245 00:12:48,720 --> 00:12:51,880 Speaker 1: saddle Beyonce, but I was like, I have to go. 246 00:12:52,520 --> 00:12:55,720 Speaker 1: I had things to do. And they had two men 247 00:12:55,760 --> 00:12:58,600 Speaker 1: at the door. Yes. And at first I was like, oh, oh, 248 00:12:58,679 --> 00:13:01,760 Speaker 1: pastor's prying, okay, And this is after the sermon. People 249 00:13:01,760 --> 00:13:03,960 Speaker 1: are just going up for their blessing or whatever. And 250 00:13:04,000 --> 00:13:07,160 Speaker 1: I'm like, oh, okay, gotcha understood. And then I had 251 00:13:07,160 --> 00:13:09,839 Speaker 1: to sit down and talk to myself. I'm like, you're 252 00:13:09,880 --> 00:13:12,960 Speaker 1: a grown woman. They can't. They can to stay inside 253 00:13:13,000 --> 00:13:16,000 Speaker 1: this building, like for me can knock this door down. 254 00:13:16,040 --> 00:13:18,640 Speaker 1: It's a very small church. And I had to go 255 00:13:18,679 --> 00:13:20,480 Speaker 1: back and be like, I'm so sorry, I really need 256 00:13:20,559 --> 00:13:24,640 Speaker 1: to go. My rides outside and I escaped and it 257 00:13:24,800 --> 00:13:30,480 Speaker 1: was and I escaped before I got to I got 258 00:13:30,559 --> 00:13:32,600 Speaker 1: and I know my aunt, my aunt has been dying 259 00:13:32,600 --> 00:13:35,040 Speaker 1: for me to come and I and and I know 260 00:13:35,160 --> 00:13:37,160 Speaker 1: she wanted me to like meet all the meet her 261 00:13:37,200 --> 00:13:39,000 Speaker 1: past her, head past her. I know she wanted me 262 00:13:39,040 --> 00:13:42,360 Speaker 1: to meet her whole, like the whole whole community. And 263 00:13:42,440 --> 00:13:45,040 Speaker 1: I was like, I'm so sorry. Next time. Next time. Now, 264 00:13:45,080 --> 00:13:47,600 Speaker 1: I know, when Aunt Brenda tells you to come to 265 00:13:47,640 --> 00:13:52,120 Speaker 1: church at eleven, get there at twelve forty five, and 266 00:13:52,160 --> 00:13:54,320 Speaker 1: then if you spend two three and a half three 267 00:13:54,320 --> 00:13:56,680 Speaker 1: hours there, then you'll be there long enough to be 268 00:13:56,720 --> 00:13:59,640 Speaker 1: able to withstand the social interaction at the end. Because 269 00:13:59,679 --> 00:14:06,320 Speaker 1: I depleted, depleted, Yeah, it's way too much. Will you try? 270 00:14:06,679 --> 00:14:09,040 Speaker 1: You did it? Girl? I couldn't you been a better 271 00:14:09,080 --> 00:14:11,240 Speaker 1: person than me? Really not a church girl. 272 00:14:11,600 --> 00:14:15,400 Speaker 2: Okay, So I I grew up Muslim, but my dad 273 00:14:15,480 --> 00:14:18,920 Speaker 2: was the only Muslim person in the family, and so 274 00:14:19,040 --> 00:14:22,720 Speaker 2: everybody else, you know, was Christian, and so I am 275 00:14:22,800 --> 00:14:25,240 Speaker 2: very familiar with church, but that's never been my thing, 276 00:14:26,080 --> 00:14:28,160 Speaker 2: and so like to be able to sit through something 277 00:14:28,200 --> 00:14:30,000 Speaker 2: like that, I couldn't ever. 278 00:14:30,640 --> 00:14:35,280 Speaker 1: Yeah, hey, ba fam, we're gonna take a quick break, 279 00:14:35,400 --> 00:14:38,640 Speaker 1: pay some bills, and we'll be right back. All right, 280 00:14:38,680 --> 00:14:41,720 Speaker 1: ba fam, We're back. I think only because I knew 281 00:14:41,800 --> 00:14:43,440 Speaker 1: half the people, and I mean it's a small trash 282 00:14:43,640 --> 00:14:46,360 Speaker 1: because the choir is like, oh, there's my cousin Tuki. 283 00:14:46,400 --> 00:14:49,280 Speaker 1: There's my cousin Ruby, There's my cousin Quita. Like it's 284 00:14:49,320 --> 00:14:53,120 Speaker 1: family and for me, I love that. Oh two Ki Yeah, 285 00:14:53,120 --> 00:14:55,240 Speaker 1: well her real name is Wandra putting all her business 286 00:14:55,280 --> 00:14:57,600 Speaker 1: out there. No one has a real name. Everyone's got 287 00:14:57,600 --> 00:15:01,000 Speaker 1: it's like Uncle Boo, I mean Uncle Kresley Kresley, Yeah, 288 00:15:01,920 --> 00:15:04,600 Speaker 1: and you know, but it was me getting to see 289 00:15:04,600 --> 00:15:06,640 Speaker 1: them in this element. It was for me, it felt 290 00:15:06,640 --> 00:15:09,400 Speaker 1: like I was watching a show, not to like not 291 00:15:09,520 --> 00:15:14,560 Speaker 1: to token eyes or to like diminish the how much 292 00:15:14,600 --> 00:15:16,840 Speaker 1: they love it and how how much it means to them. 293 00:15:17,400 --> 00:15:19,080 Speaker 1: But it was just really beautiful for me to be 294 00:15:19,120 --> 00:15:21,040 Speaker 1: in that environment and to see them do their thing. 295 00:15:21,080 --> 00:15:23,080 Speaker 1: I mean I never get to see my I mean, 296 00:15:23,120 --> 00:15:24,600 Speaker 1: my aunt brand is always trying to preach to me 297 00:15:24,640 --> 00:15:26,560 Speaker 1: on the phone. But it was cool. It was really 298 00:15:26,640 --> 00:15:30,240 Speaker 1: cool to see her in her bag, you know, in 299 00:15:30,280 --> 00:15:32,640 Speaker 1: the right context, not when I'm trying to like get 300 00:15:32,680 --> 00:15:33,120 Speaker 1: her off. 301 00:15:32,960 --> 00:15:35,680 Speaker 2: The phone, get off the phone. 302 00:15:36,400 --> 00:15:38,480 Speaker 1: And seeing my uncle Boo and like seeing the way 303 00:15:38,480 --> 00:15:40,600 Speaker 1: that the move the music was moving him. He's you know, 304 00:15:40,720 --> 00:15:43,120 Speaker 1: he's my older. These are my great uncles and they 305 00:15:43,160 --> 00:15:46,480 Speaker 1: are you know, they're older, they're getting on but he 306 00:15:46,560 --> 00:15:48,360 Speaker 1: got and he has a bad back, but he got up. 307 00:15:48,400 --> 00:15:51,160 Speaker 1: He was doing his little to his little two step. 308 00:15:51,680 --> 00:15:54,200 Speaker 1: The Holy Spirit was moving him. And you know, cousin 309 00:15:54,240 --> 00:15:57,400 Speaker 1: Tuki and and Brenda were they were singing, they're doing 310 00:15:57,480 --> 00:16:00,720 Speaker 1: and it was and then my cousin be her son 311 00:16:00,840 --> 00:16:02,800 Speaker 1: is like on the keys, and then two key and 312 00:16:02,800 --> 00:16:04,800 Speaker 1: then another. I forget. I got always cousins. I don't 313 00:16:04,800 --> 00:16:07,080 Speaker 1: know which cousin it was who was also on the keys. 314 00:16:07,120 --> 00:16:09,920 Speaker 1: Another cousin's doing the drums. It's I don't know. It 315 00:16:09,960 --> 00:16:12,880 Speaker 1: felt really, I'm not gonna lie. I got really emotional 316 00:16:12,960 --> 00:16:16,440 Speaker 1: during the service and after because I won. I'm coming 317 00:16:16,480 --> 00:16:20,920 Speaker 1: off my zoloft finally after five years, so we have withdrawals. 318 00:16:21,040 --> 00:16:24,480 Speaker 1: But two All week I had been like running and 319 00:16:24,720 --> 00:16:27,520 Speaker 1: anxious and like doing stuff and moving from here to 320 00:16:27,560 --> 00:16:28,840 Speaker 1: there with the kid and my dad and all that. 321 00:16:28,960 --> 00:16:33,160 Speaker 1: And I had not had any quiet reflection time. And 322 00:16:33,240 --> 00:16:35,680 Speaker 1: there was something really special about the like being in 323 00:16:35,680 --> 00:16:38,640 Speaker 1: that environment because it invites you. I'm not telling anyone 324 00:16:38,680 --> 00:16:41,000 Speaker 1: listening anything new, probably about church, like did you know 325 00:16:41,680 --> 00:16:45,840 Speaker 1: at church? Let me tell you something breaking what it 326 00:16:45,920 --> 00:16:48,560 Speaker 1: might be teaching me because I don't know, Well, it's 327 00:16:48,560 --> 00:16:51,000 Speaker 1: a quiet it's a quiet reflective I mean, full shit, 328 00:16:51,080 --> 00:16:53,120 Speaker 1: never mind it my that church was not quiet, but 329 00:16:53,200 --> 00:16:57,120 Speaker 1: it is a moment that invites reflection. Yeah, and the 330 00:16:57,360 --> 00:16:59,760 Speaker 1: minute I started to reflect on what I had been 331 00:16:59,760 --> 00:17:02,960 Speaker 1: going through that week and that day, And yes I 332 00:17:03,000 --> 00:17:04,960 Speaker 1: thought about Beyonce tickets during it, but I try not 333 00:17:05,000 --> 00:17:10,119 Speaker 1: to be too distract Yeah. Everything, and then and just 334 00:17:10,119 --> 00:17:11,840 Speaker 1: the fact that I hadn't been to church in so long, 335 00:17:11,880 --> 00:17:14,000 Speaker 1: and that I hadn't really gotten to embrace this part 336 00:17:14,040 --> 00:17:16,440 Speaker 1: of my heritage and so long. And I'm just thinking 337 00:17:16,440 --> 00:17:18,520 Speaker 1: about me as a baby going to churches like that. 338 00:17:18,600 --> 00:17:21,920 Speaker 1: I was so shy and every time my dad would 339 00:17:21,920 --> 00:17:23,600 Speaker 1: bring us to church, it would be like an event, 340 00:17:23,840 --> 00:17:26,720 Speaker 1: like they would like, talk about us, stand up now 341 00:17:26,760 --> 00:17:29,600 Speaker 1: in the back. Who you got back there, Amanda? And 342 00:17:29,640 --> 00:17:32,800 Speaker 1: I would be mortified. And I never felt comfortable in 343 00:17:32,840 --> 00:17:36,040 Speaker 1: that space. So I started reflecting about all that. And 344 00:17:37,160 --> 00:17:40,960 Speaker 1: I'm feeling very connected to Atlanta lately and Georgia and 345 00:17:41,040 --> 00:17:44,360 Speaker 1: so anyway, Yeah, I got in my fields. And when 346 00:17:44,359 --> 00:17:47,880 Speaker 1: I left church, I thought, this is when I let 347 00:17:47,880 --> 00:17:49,560 Speaker 1: go and let God. So when I leave church, they 348 00:17:49,560 --> 00:17:53,280 Speaker 1: will have figured out the Beyonce tickets, right, No, no, nothing, 349 00:17:53,720 --> 00:17:57,400 Speaker 1: nothing had changed, and I had I was like, either 350 00:17:57,400 --> 00:18:00,520 Speaker 1: going to have to fight it, like use more energy. 351 00:18:00,760 --> 00:18:02,720 Speaker 1: I have three or four hours, so I'm ready trying 352 00:18:02,760 --> 00:18:05,040 Speaker 1: to get to the show and like use that energy 353 00:18:05,080 --> 00:18:07,119 Speaker 1: to fight it and get the tickets that I really wanted. 354 00:18:07,119 --> 00:18:10,000 Speaker 1: But I was like, you know what, just give me stuff. 355 00:18:10,040 --> 00:18:14,160 Speaker 1: Hubba offered me floor tickets, but no longer front row 356 00:18:14,200 --> 00:18:16,040 Speaker 1: of the floor section. Now I was in the back. 357 00:18:16,880 --> 00:18:20,760 Speaker 1: Oh god. So I took the ticket. I'm like, fine, 358 00:18:20,760 --> 00:18:22,439 Speaker 1: I'm still gonna have a great time. I'll fight with 359 00:18:22,520 --> 00:18:25,040 Speaker 1: them tomorrow. And I went and I had me a 360 00:18:25,040 --> 00:18:27,800 Speaker 1: good ass time and it was so fun nice. I 361 00:18:27,880 --> 00:18:31,600 Speaker 1: put together a little fit. Okay, all the girls were 362 00:18:31,600 --> 00:18:33,480 Speaker 1: at the country Western stores. Let me tell you, we 363 00:18:33,520 --> 00:18:41,760 Speaker 1: had those Mexicans work in hard, very western stores. Like 364 00:18:41,840 --> 00:18:44,600 Speaker 1: it's Mexicans, Okay. When the rodeo alive? Right? Oh yeah, 365 00:18:45,119 --> 00:18:47,760 Speaker 1: oh for sure. And I'm sure there's another name for 366 00:18:47,800 --> 00:18:49,520 Speaker 1: I'm trying to think of the name. What do Mexicans 367 00:18:49,560 --> 00:18:53,920 Speaker 1: call the rodeo? Like what their gauchos whatever, that whole 368 00:18:53,920 --> 00:18:56,320 Speaker 1: Mexican cowboy thing like that. It's I guess it runs 369 00:18:56,320 --> 00:18:58,400 Speaker 1: deep in Georgia, which makes sense. We have a huge, 370 00:18:58,440 --> 00:19:02,560 Speaker 1: huge Mexican population in and around Atlanta. But I looked 371 00:19:02,600 --> 00:19:05,360 Speaker 1: up the closest country Western store. I was like, I'm 372 00:19:05,359 --> 00:19:07,960 Speaker 1: going to get some real authentic shit every time me 373 00:19:07,960 --> 00:19:11,920 Speaker 1: why every cowboy, Carter attendee, all the all the girls 374 00:19:11,960 --> 00:19:13,880 Speaker 1: had the same idea. We all got on Google, found 375 00:19:13,880 --> 00:19:17,880 Speaker 1: the same store and we bought the place out. They 376 00:19:17,880 --> 00:19:21,000 Speaker 1: were I mean like there were no boots left, the 377 00:19:21,080 --> 00:19:23,920 Speaker 1: hats where they were like those those girls were sweating 378 00:19:24,080 --> 00:19:27,240 Speaker 1: running around trying to get what we needed, like and 379 00:19:27,400 --> 00:19:30,880 Speaker 1: they were stressed. But tell me why Beyonce was blasting 380 00:19:30,920 --> 00:19:32,800 Speaker 1: on the speakers. I knew. I was like, we were 381 00:19:32,840 --> 00:19:38,080 Speaker 1: uplifting the local economy. This is amazing. Yes, And I 382 00:19:38,119 --> 00:19:40,600 Speaker 1: got a cute got a cute little bit, got some boots, 383 00:19:40,640 --> 00:19:46,360 Speaker 1: got a hat, had me as I loved that. Oh 384 00:19:46,400 --> 00:19:50,280 Speaker 1: my god. Wait, somehow we got on that whole tangent 385 00:19:50,600 --> 00:19:52,160 Speaker 1: when I was trying to ask you about your mini 386 00:19:52,240 --> 00:19:56,320 Speaker 1: retirement and I have no idea how, but I had 387 00:19:56,359 --> 00:19:59,200 Speaker 1: to get off my chest. So okay, so I went 388 00:19:59,240 --> 00:20:01,280 Speaker 1: to Beyonce to what what's your what's your? What is 389 00:20:01,320 --> 00:20:03,359 Speaker 1: the mini retirement update? How's it going? 390 00:20:03,480 --> 00:20:03,600 Speaker 2: Is it? 391 00:20:03,800 --> 00:20:04,480 Speaker 1: Has it started? 392 00:20:04,800 --> 00:20:10,440 Speaker 2: So I am taking a break is gonna look a 393 00:20:10,440 --> 00:20:18,440 Speaker 2: little bit different. Yeah, I can't. Well, yeah, there's going 394 00:20:18,480 --> 00:20:20,520 Speaker 2: to be a break. And there's some stuff that I 395 00:20:20,600 --> 00:20:24,719 Speaker 2: have to do with my kids, Like I'm taking my 396 00:20:25,040 --> 00:20:29,280 Speaker 2: daughter next week to Columbia for a mommy daughter. 397 00:20:29,119 --> 00:20:31,320 Speaker 1: Retreat, which one than the eleven year old. 398 00:20:31,920 --> 00:20:37,240 Speaker 2: Yeah, uh huh. It's like a coming up age like bonding. 399 00:20:37,560 --> 00:20:39,359 Speaker 2: You know, it's like the time where they start to 400 00:20:39,400 --> 00:20:43,080 Speaker 2: rebel and kind of pull away, but like my you know, 401 00:20:43,520 --> 00:20:45,880 Speaker 2: uh source to kind of like bring them back in 402 00:20:45,960 --> 00:20:47,919 Speaker 2: and give you the resources that you need to have 403 00:20:47,960 --> 00:20:50,919 Speaker 2: those conversations that are really hard to have or that 404 00:20:51,040 --> 00:20:53,080 Speaker 2: you never knew how to have because like I didn't 405 00:20:53,080 --> 00:20:55,280 Speaker 2: have a mom, so I didn't know how to have 406 00:20:55,359 --> 00:20:58,440 Speaker 2: those kinds. I don't know how to have those kinds. 407 00:20:58,680 --> 00:21:02,080 Speaker 2: M she left when I was five, and she was 408 00:21:02,119 --> 00:21:05,680 Speaker 2: around like I would go there like during holidays or whatever, 409 00:21:05,760 --> 00:21:09,840 Speaker 2: but she, you know, she wasn't a mom. You know 410 00:21:09,880 --> 00:21:11,879 Speaker 2: a lot of people, there's a lot of people that 411 00:21:12,080 --> 00:21:16,520 Speaker 2: don't really want to be moms, but they have kids 412 00:21:16,560 --> 00:21:20,399 Speaker 2: because but it's a whole different situations. Like Dad's like 413 00:21:20,440 --> 00:21:22,800 Speaker 2: you have you can you can parent, you can have kids, 414 00:21:22,840 --> 00:21:24,919 Speaker 2: but you don't know how to parent. It was like 415 00:21:24,960 --> 00:21:27,879 Speaker 2: one of those situations, so you know, all of this 416 00:21:27,960 --> 00:21:32,720 Speaker 2: stuff about parenting like like just kind of flying. But 417 00:21:34,040 --> 00:21:39,879 Speaker 2: you know, I'm just taking along. I believe me, Mandy, 418 00:21:40,000 --> 00:21:41,000 Speaker 2: I'm trying, but. 419 00:21:42,960 --> 00:21:46,959 Speaker 1: A good mom. I'm not the best. I didn't say 420 00:21:47,000 --> 00:21:48,399 Speaker 1: you were the best and said you were such a 421 00:21:48,400 --> 00:21:50,119 Speaker 1: good mom. Yeah, I'm trying. 422 00:21:50,720 --> 00:21:54,960 Speaker 2: I'm trying, like every day, like I'm trying so doing that, 423 00:21:55,720 --> 00:21:58,720 Speaker 2: just taking time, just being with the kids because they 424 00:21:58,800 --> 00:22:03,159 Speaker 2: need me. I can't get this time back and I 425 00:22:03,200 --> 00:22:08,960 Speaker 2: don't have a defined time, but I'm taking some time. 426 00:22:09,960 --> 00:22:12,240 Speaker 2: It just looks a little bit different. Like I really 427 00:22:12,240 --> 00:22:15,879 Speaker 2: wanted to take the kids to like Costa Rica and 428 00:22:16,040 --> 00:22:21,000 Speaker 2: like really explore and like do some world schooling, but 429 00:22:21,040 --> 00:22:25,520 Speaker 2: my daddy was like I can't do that, And I 430 00:22:25,640 --> 00:22:28,159 Speaker 2: was like fine because I'm not because he's really a 431 00:22:28,160 --> 00:22:30,199 Speaker 2: good cull parent and I'm not trying to mess up 432 00:22:30,240 --> 00:22:31,200 Speaker 2: the relationship up. 433 00:22:31,600 --> 00:22:33,720 Speaker 1: So you know, I had to give a little bit. Oh, 434 00:22:33,800 --> 00:22:39,800 Speaker 1: I understand, you know, I that's really tough. It's even 435 00:22:39,840 --> 00:22:42,159 Speaker 1: being in Georgia with my two year old for a 436 00:22:42,200 --> 00:22:47,439 Speaker 1: week and having my husband up here. I like I 437 00:22:47,440 --> 00:22:51,919 Speaker 1: felt the type of way about him like it was weird. 438 00:22:52,040 --> 00:22:55,280 Speaker 1: I was like, I want to see when I was 439 00:22:55,280 --> 00:22:57,199 Speaker 1: trying to FaceTime my five year old and like he 440 00:22:57,280 --> 00:23:00,480 Speaker 1: wasn't like enriy Kue wasn't my husband wasn't available. Mind you, 441 00:23:00,480 --> 00:23:02,439 Speaker 1: we're still married, we're together. And I was like, what 442 00:23:02,440 --> 00:23:04,200 Speaker 1: do you mean You're keeping my son from me? You're 443 00:23:04,280 --> 00:23:07,760 Speaker 1: keeping my child, I my time, you know, and you 444 00:23:08,119 --> 00:23:11,240 Speaker 1: like even you know, even so I can't even imagine, 445 00:23:11,359 --> 00:23:14,800 Speaker 1: you know, if that was you know, our forever reality. 446 00:23:16,480 --> 00:23:18,200 Speaker 1: So I am sad because I think the last time 447 00:23:18,840 --> 00:23:20,439 Speaker 1: you were on the show, you really like, you know, 448 00:23:20,480 --> 00:23:22,280 Speaker 1: you had your ideal of what you wanted the many 449 00:23:22,359 --> 00:23:26,360 Speaker 1: retirement to look like. But that's some real, real shit. Yeah. 450 00:23:26,400 --> 00:23:30,040 Speaker 2: It was some like like come to Jesus, like listen, 451 00:23:30,200 --> 00:23:34,280 Speaker 2: like you can't move like that because that's not your reality. 452 00:23:34,640 --> 00:23:38,080 Speaker 2: And you know, I was like, okay, well it's not 453 00:23:38,119 --> 00:23:40,280 Speaker 2: gonna work out like I thought it would, because like 454 00:23:40,400 --> 00:23:43,399 Speaker 2: I thought, like I guess, I thought I had communicated 455 00:23:43,440 --> 00:23:46,479 Speaker 2: it better and I thought we had the conversation and 456 00:23:46,840 --> 00:23:50,280 Speaker 2: even if we did, like at that point, he wasn't 457 00:23:50,320 --> 00:23:52,679 Speaker 2: ready for that. And I was like, well, what do 458 00:23:52,760 --> 00:23:57,200 Speaker 2: you do? Like I can't sacrifice this relationship. He's worried 459 00:23:57,200 --> 00:23:59,360 Speaker 2: about putting a strain on a relationship with this kid, 460 00:23:59,400 --> 00:24:00,359 Speaker 2: with the kids, you know. 461 00:24:00,440 --> 00:24:06,280 Speaker 1: So I'm just like, that's very fair, knowingly so, but okay, fine, 462 00:24:06,560 --> 00:24:12,720 Speaker 1: right right when they care to be involved, exactly, it's 463 00:24:13,119 --> 00:24:15,400 Speaker 1: double edged or it's like, you know, you want them 464 00:24:15,400 --> 00:24:17,719 Speaker 1: to be involved, but then they're involved and say you 465 00:24:17,760 --> 00:24:22,600 Speaker 1: have to deal with It's not a dictatorship, No, it's not. So. 466 00:24:23,440 --> 00:24:25,679 Speaker 2: I mean, I think it's all gonna work out for 467 00:24:25,760 --> 00:24:29,639 Speaker 2: the good. Like it, everything always works out, So I 468 00:24:29,680 --> 00:24:32,640 Speaker 2: don't have any bad feelings about it. It just looks 469 00:24:32,680 --> 00:24:38,280 Speaker 2: different and it's not as like planned out as I 470 00:24:38,320 --> 00:24:40,440 Speaker 2: thought it would be by this point. But it's all 471 00:24:40,480 --> 00:24:42,959 Speaker 2: coming together. Everything is falling into place, and I'm just 472 00:24:43,000 --> 00:24:44,760 Speaker 2: excited for what's to come. 473 00:24:45,400 --> 00:24:49,640 Speaker 1: I think that's a word. Especially as moms, we're so unfree. 474 00:24:50,800 --> 00:24:54,160 Speaker 1: It's so you know, how you try to have like, oh, 475 00:24:54,240 --> 00:24:57,000 Speaker 1: it's a beautiful day, it's a nice sunset, let's pack 476 00:24:57,000 --> 00:24:59,040 Speaker 1: the kids up and go to the park and just enjoy. 477 00:24:59,320 --> 00:25:02,840 Speaker 1: There's no such thing is a simple choice, you know, 478 00:25:02,920 --> 00:25:04,720 Speaker 1: even if you can plan for days and weeks and 479 00:25:04,760 --> 00:25:09,000 Speaker 1: then the reality of it, of the complications and the 480 00:25:09,000 --> 00:25:13,119 Speaker 1: people involved can quickly jerk you in a direction you 481 00:25:13,119 --> 00:25:15,320 Speaker 1: never wanted to be in or complicate everything, and so 482 00:25:15,840 --> 00:25:20,240 Speaker 1: I just I really appreciate you for sharing that, And 483 00:25:21,359 --> 00:25:24,560 Speaker 1: also I think it's a good just for anyone who's 484 00:25:24,600 --> 00:25:26,920 Speaker 1: thinking about the way that retirement will look for them, 485 00:25:27,359 --> 00:25:29,360 Speaker 1: or the way that their career will look for them, 486 00:25:29,520 --> 00:25:32,560 Speaker 1: and the vision that they have for you know, I 487 00:25:32,800 --> 00:25:34,680 Speaker 1: hear all the time, I'm gonna work really really hard 488 00:25:34,720 --> 00:25:37,159 Speaker 1: until I'm forty five, and then I'm gonna take you know, 489 00:25:37,160 --> 00:25:39,679 Speaker 1: then I'm gonna quit. I'm gonna go retire early, and 490 00:25:39,720 --> 00:25:42,520 Speaker 1: it's going to look a certain way. But life has 491 00:25:42,840 --> 00:25:46,879 Speaker 1: other plans sometimes. And does that mean that we're going 492 00:25:46,960 --> 00:25:50,119 Speaker 1: to give up the hope and the goal of getting 493 00:25:50,119 --> 00:25:53,040 Speaker 1: that time for rest and for like you said, like 494 00:25:53,119 --> 00:25:57,360 Speaker 1: you know, educating your girls globally and really exposing them 495 00:25:57,359 --> 00:25:59,440 Speaker 1: to a lot of the world and you know, to 496 00:25:59,520 --> 00:26:01,480 Speaker 1: teach all the learnings and teachings that you wanted to 497 00:26:01,840 --> 00:26:05,359 Speaker 1: give them. Like that can still happen. There's still time 498 00:26:05,400 --> 00:26:08,760 Speaker 1: for it, but maybe it's a week here, a couple 499 00:26:08,720 --> 00:26:12,640 Speaker 1: of months there, or whatever, you know, patched together. Yeah, 500 00:26:12,840 --> 00:26:15,520 Speaker 1: So what does that mean for you? Job wise? Are 501 00:26:15,560 --> 00:26:18,200 Speaker 1: you able to. I mean, you're a nurse, so you're 502 00:26:18,440 --> 00:26:22,000 Speaker 1: you have like forever job security in that sense. 503 00:26:22,440 --> 00:26:26,240 Speaker 2: Yeah, I'll be okay, Like, like the job is still 504 00:26:26,240 --> 00:26:31,359 Speaker 2: there for right now, it's just looks more like me 505 00:26:31,440 --> 00:26:36,719 Speaker 2: taking a break, but it's still it's still there. So 506 00:26:36,800 --> 00:26:40,439 Speaker 2: I'm trying to take it like in increments of what 507 00:26:40,480 --> 00:26:42,520 Speaker 2: that's going to look like, if like when I'm going 508 00:26:42,600 --> 00:26:44,880 Speaker 2: to go back, or how it's going to look when 509 00:26:44,920 --> 00:26:48,000 Speaker 2: I go back. You know, I still have other stuff 510 00:26:48,040 --> 00:26:51,080 Speaker 2: going on, like when you date to one that's across 511 00:26:51,160 --> 00:26:54,399 Speaker 2: the country from you. You know, all of that stuff 512 00:26:54,440 --> 00:26:57,840 Speaker 2: has a role to play, and like how I'm gonna move. 513 00:26:57,920 --> 00:27:01,000 Speaker 2: So I'm just taking my time, letting things kind of 514 00:27:01,000 --> 00:27:04,280 Speaker 2: play out and then I just know it'll work out 515 00:27:04,400 --> 00:27:06,840 Speaker 2: as it's supposed to be. But like I said, like 516 00:27:06,880 --> 00:27:08,720 Speaker 2: it's not as defined as I thought it would be 517 00:27:08,800 --> 00:27:11,600 Speaker 2: at this point, and that's okay because it's still is 518 00:27:11,640 --> 00:27:12,359 Speaker 2: still all good. 519 00:27:12,920 --> 00:27:15,439 Speaker 1: It's still working out. We're still moving into rows. We're 520 00:27:15,480 --> 00:27:19,840 Speaker 1: obsessed with you. I want to I love the idea 521 00:27:19,880 --> 00:27:22,320 Speaker 1: of I mean, how beautiful is that to take? How 522 00:27:22,359 --> 00:27:24,360 Speaker 1: long You're going to be in Columbia with your eldest 523 00:27:25,280 --> 00:27:29,199 Speaker 1: for a week one week. Mm hmm. That's incredible. I 524 00:27:29,200 --> 00:27:34,639 Speaker 1: mean I wonder how many parents like this is what 525 00:27:34,680 --> 00:27:36,800 Speaker 1: the money is for in a way, like to do 526 00:27:36,840 --> 00:27:40,320 Speaker 1: a retreat like this. Yeah, especially like the way you said, 527 00:27:40,359 --> 00:27:42,200 Speaker 1: at a time when they're like she's becoming a little 528 00:27:42,240 --> 00:27:48,800 Speaker 1: preteen and all the changes and ugh, that's really really special. 529 00:27:49,880 --> 00:27:52,320 Speaker 1: And who hosts it is it's like a like is 530 00:27:52,359 --> 00:27:54,520 Speaker 1: it for mothers and daughters specifically? 531 00:27:55,280 --> 00:27:58,760 Speaker 2: Yeah, it's it's a mommy and me retreat is specifically 532 00:27:58,840 --> 00:28:01,480 Speaker 2: for that. It's the girls have to be a certain 533 00:28:01,560 --> 00:28:06,439 Speaker 2: age to participate, like it's in the they have certain 534 00:28:06,480 --> 00:28:10,679 Speaker 2: ceremonies that they do, like it's all planned out, like 535 00:28:10,720 --> 00:28:12,800 Speaker 2: the retreat space is just for us. 536 00:28:14,119 --> 00:28:16,240 Speaker 1: Okay, yeah, it's. 537 00:28:16,080 --> 00:28:19,760 Speaker 2: So I'm looking forward to it because it's like during 538 00:28:19,800 --> 00:28:22,760 Speaker 2: the time. Yeah, it's like during the time when you know, 539 00:28:23,720 --> 00:28:26,680 Speaker 2: you know, they're in they're they're in their preteen they're 540 00:28:26,720 --> 00:28:30,560 Speaker 2: tweens and or teenage years, and they're starting to pull 541 00:28:30,600 --> 00:28:33,480 Speaker 2: away and that relationship is starting to become afraid and 542 00:28:33,520 --> 00:28:35,560 Speaker 2: I'm starting to feel that. I started to feel that, 543 00:28:35,600 --> 00:28:38,040 Speaker 2: and I was just like I don't want that for us, 544 00:28:38,200 --> 00:28:41,840 Speaker 2: but you know, but not knowing how to navigate that 545 00:28:41,920 --> 00:28:44,680 Speaker 2: situation either it's kind of hard, so it's like right 546 00:28:44,720 --> 00:28:45,200 Speaker 2: on time. 547 00:28:45,560 --> 00:28:47,960 Speaker 1: So I'm looking forward to it. So are these like 548 00:28:48,080 --> 00:28:52,720 Speaker 1: parenting like are they a therapists or pediatricians? Like what's 549 00:28:53,000 --> 00:28:55,320 Speaker 1: is it just not. 550 00:28:57,400 --> 00:29:00,800 Speaker 2: You know what? Certification wise, I'm not a hundred percent sure, 551 00:29:01,320 --> 00:29:03,240 Speaker 2: but I know that they've been doing these retreats for 552 00:29:03,280 --> 00:29:06,240 Speaker 2: a while and have like some strong testimonies from it, 553 00:29:06,400 --> 00:29:09,959 Speaker 2: and so like, yeah, I'm not I'm not caught up 554 00:29:09,960 --> 00:29:13,200 Speaker 2: on like certifications and all that kind of stuff, but 555 00:29:13,360 --> 00:29:18,120 Speaker 2: I do go off of energy and vibes, and you know, 556 00:29:18,600 --> 00:29:22,160 Speaker 2: the energy is like where I needed to be and 557 00:29:22,200 --> 00:29:24,440 Speaker 2: what I need, the space that I need my daughter 558 00:29:24,480 --> 00:29:24,880 Speaker 2: to be in. 559 00:29:25,360 --> 00:29:28,680 Speaker 1: So as someone who has zero certifications police, I am 560 00:29:28,720 --> 00:29:32,240 Speaker 1: not all looking to judge or even like I don't 561 00:29:32,280 --> 00:29:34,360 Speaker 1: think that's even what matters. I think the testimonies, like 562 00:29:34,360 --> 00:29:36,920 Speaker 1: you said, is amazing. I'm just really curious. 563 00:29:37,000 --> 00:29:37,200 Speaker 2: You know. 564 00:29:37,720 --> 00:29:43,880 Speaker 1: Yeah, beautiful, that's a beautiful like business to have. Costa Rica. Well, 565 00:29:43,880 --> 00:29:48,400 Speaker 1: I hope you guys have the best thing. Colombia. Colombia. Oh, Colombia, 566 00:29:48,440 --> 00:29:52,120 Speaker 1: that's right, Colombia. Confused, Oh, I hope you're the best 567 00:29:52,160 --> 00:29:55,600 Speaker 1: time ever. Even though I missed my five year old 568 00:29:55,640 --> 00:29:58,320 Speaker 1: so much. It was nice because two year old Remy 569 00:29:58,360 --> 00:30:01,719 Speaker 1: as a daddy's boy and a boy. I mean, if 570 00:30:01,760 --> 00:30:04,360 Speaker 1: Daddy's around Mommy gets the he will shove me in 571 00:30:04,480 --> 00:30:07,320 Speaker 1: my face to get me out of the way. I'm 572 00:30:07,360 --> 00:30:11,640 Speaker 1: not getting I'm like yeah, And that's why I decided 573 00:30:11,640 --> 00:30:13,320 Speaker 1: to take him. I could have taken either, you know. 574 00:30:13,440 --> 00:30:16,080 Speaker 1: The idea was just you know, I'll take one, and 575 00:30:16,120 --> 00:30:18,560 Speaker 1: I was like, no, let's let's recalibrate a little bit. 576 00:30:18,640 --> 00:30:21,360 Speaker 1: Daddy and Rion need to have some time Mommy and 577 00:30:21,400 --> 00:30:23,200 Speaker 1: the baby. I need to remind this. I need to 578 00:30:23,200 --> 00:30:26,920 Speaker 1: remind him who he you know, like who actually burst 579 00:30:27,000 --> 00:30:29,760 Speaker 1: him into this world? Right, Like, yeah, he gave me 580 00:30:29,800 --> 00:30:32,160 Speaker 1: a run for my money, honey, he is in the town. 581 00:30:32,400 --> 00:30:33,320 Speaker 1: He was bad. 582 00:30:35,080 --> 00:30:40,880 Speaker 2: Oh bit god, Oh mine too. And she is very 583 00:30:41,000 --> 00:30:42,320 Speaker 2: vocal too, and. 584 00:30:43,840 --> 00:30:45,880 Speaker 1: So much more vocal than big brother was. Big Brother 585 00:30:45,920 --> 00:30:47,880 Speaker 1: had a speech to lay till about three thirty three 586 00:30:47,880 --> 00:30:51,080 Speaker 1: and a half three thirty three and a half, and meanwhile, 587 00:30:51,120 --> 00:30:54,280 Speaker 1: Remy is like, he will tell you exactly. He sings songs, 588 00:30:54,560 --> 00:30:58,080 Speaker 1: he repeats everything I say, and he tells me everything 589 00:30:58,080 --> 00:31:00,480 Speaker 1: he wants and doesn't want. And it's like. 590 00:31:00,480 --> 00:31:03,440 Speaker 2: Telling you that they went poop again in their diaper 591 00:31:03,480 --> 00:31:04,600 Speaker 2: instead of being the toilet. 592 00:31:05,960 --> 00:31:07,920 Speaker 1: I want to take a quick break and I want 593 00:31:07,960 --> 00:31:09,720 Speaker 1: to come back. We got some buzzworthy to talk about. 594 00:31:09,920 --> 00:31:12,280 Speaker 1: We're going to do brown Boost Brown Break. I also 595 00:31:12,280 --> 00:31:14,400 Speaker 1: want to tell BA Fam about our book club pick 596 00:31:14,560 --> 00:31:19,120 Speaker 1: and how you can join our first author speaker series 597 00:31:19,240 --> 00:31:21,640 Speaker 1: for the BA book Club. So stick around, BA Fam. 598 00:31:21,640 --> 00:31:23,480 Speaker 1: We're going to be right back and again. I'm joined 599 00:31:23,480 --> 00:31:31,000 Speaker 1: by Nasima McElroy financially intentional da back all right, va Fam, 600 00:31:31,040 --> 00:31:34,640 Speaker 1: I'm back. Nasima had to go because she is a 601 00:31:34,680 --> 00:31:38,520 Speaker 1: busy woman. So I am here writing solo for one 602 00:31:38,560 --> 00:31:40,920 Speaker 1: of the best parts of my week, which is getting 603 00:31:40,960 --> 00:31:44,120 Speaker 1: an opportunity to reflect and either take a brown boost 604 00:31:44,200 --> 00:31:46,520 Speaker 1: or a brown break. Now I done told y'all every 605 00:31:47,240 --> 00:31:48,920 Speaker 1: it Well, Actually no, I haven't, because I could have 606 00:31:48,960 --> 00:31:51,920 Speaker 1: talked for hours and hours more about the Beyonce Show 607 00:31:52,000 --> 00:31:55,520 Speaker 1: Atlanta Night three. Baby, we really did it. Like Beyonce, 608 00:31:55,680 --> 00:31:58,680 Speaker 1: we are her faves. She loves Atlanta. She said we 609 00:31:58,680 --> 00:32:01,680 Speaker 1: were best dressed. It was incredible. Not only did I 610 00:32:01,720 --> 00:32:04,120 Speaker 1: have an incredible time of the show. After the show, 611 00:32:04,400 --> 00:32:07,640 Speaker 1: I'm walking, I'm just like flying. I'm like Hi on 612 00:32:07,680 --> 00:32:10,760 Speaker 1: the vibes of the Beyonce concert. Also, I might actually 613 00:32:10,760 --> 00:32:13,440 Speaker 1: have been high because the number of people who were 614 00:32:13,480 --> 00:32:17,840 Speaker 1: toking up in my row, like in the floor seats, 615 00:32:18,200 --> 00:32:20,760 Speaker 1: the contact high it could have been. It might have 616 00:32:20,840 --> 00:32:22,600 Speaker 1: been Beyonce. It could have been the fact that jay 617 00:32:22,680 --> 00:32:25,320 Speaker 1: Z was a surprise guest on night three. It could 618 00:32:25,320 --> 00:32:29,480 Speaker 1: have been the Cutwater Margarita that I had waiting in 619 00:32:29,520 --> 00:32:31,480 Speaker 1: line before I got to the show. Like who knows, 620 00:32:31,800 --> 00:32:35,360 Speaker 1: But I was feeling good after the show, and I'm 621 00:32:35,360 --> 00:32:38,360 Speaker 1: standing on the street corner outside of Mercedes Benz Arena 622 00:32:39,360 --> 00:32:41,280 Speaker 1: and they have all these streets blocked off. It's everyone's 623 00:32:41,320 --> 00:32:43,719 Speaker 1: kind of like, kind of milling about. No one knows 624 00:32:43,760 --> 00:32:45,520 Speaker 1: where the hell we are, even though a lot of 625 00:32:45,600 --> 00:32:48,160 Speaker 1: us are from Atlanta. I'm like, why is this city 626 00:32:48,240 --> 00:32:50,640 Speaker 1: so damn confusing? Where are the street signs? Where are 627 00:32:50,680 --> 00:32:53,520 Speaker 1: they all crooked? Damn? But I'm standing there trying to 628 00:32:53,520 --> 00:32:55,040 Speaker 1: figure out where I'm going to meet? My dad is 629 00:32:55,080 --> 00:32:58,040 Speaker 1: picking me up and tell me why. I hear screams 630 00:32:58,080 --> 00:32:59,720 Speaker 1: and I look to my left and I see this 631 00:32:59,720 --> 00:33:05,360 Speaker 1: black suv and the most gorgeous face and the most 632 00:33:05,400 --> 00:33:08,160 Speaker 1: gorgeous face. Can I say that again? The most gorgeous 633 00:33:08,160 --> 00:33:12,280 Speaker 1: face I'll ever see in the window, like eight inches 634 00:33:12,320 --> 00:33:14,680 Speaker 1: of window is cracked down, and I see Beyonce and 635 00:33:14,720 --> 00:33:18,200 Speaker 1: she is there. She is smiling, she's waving, and Julius 636 00:33:18,240 --> 00:33:20,320 Speaker 1: is in the front seat, and she turns the corner. 637 00:33:20,600 --> 00:33:22,959 Speaker 1: I'm right here. I'm around the corner. She turns the corner. 638 00:33:23,560 --> 00:33:25,800 Speaker 1: I run around a park car because I'm like, oh, 639 00:33:25,800 --> 00:33:27,800 Speaker 1: I'm gonna get to wave to Beyonce. She's right there. 640 00:33:27,960 --> 00:33:29,760 Speaker 1: I run around the park car. By the time I 641 00:33:29,840 --> 00:33:33,600 Speaker 1: get there and she crosses my path, her window is 642 00:33:33,640 --> 00:33:37,360 Speaker 1: going it's pretty much up and Julius. Julius is like 643 00:33:37,400 --> 00:33:40,640 Speaker 1: hanging out the window, mean mugging. He is like looking 644 00:33:40,680 --> 00:33:42,160 Speaker 1: at that crowd, like I wish yall would try to 645 00:33:42,200 --> 00:33:44,560 Speaker 1: run up on this suv right now. I just know 646 00:33:45,120 --> 00:33:48,320 Speaker 1: he was scary. But I waved, and I'm just hoping. 647 00:33:48,760 --> 00:33:50,800 Speaker 1: I know she had the window up. It was tinted 648 00:33:50,800 --> 00:33:52,280 Speaker 1: within an inch of its life. But I hope she 649 00:33:52,320 --> 00:33:55,120 Speaker 1: saw me waving. I hope she saw the outfit that 650 00:33:55,120 --> 00:33:57,240 Speaker 1: I was wearing. I worked really hard on my fit. 651 00:33:58,480 --> 00:34:00,600 Speaker 1: I was joking that I try to look sexy and 652 00:34:00,680 --> 00:34:02,240 Speaker 1: like wear the black on black. A lot of the 653 00:34:02,240 --> 00:34:04,920 Speaker 1: girls were wearing the black on black, you know, cowboy 654 00:34:04,960 --> 00:34:07,880 Speaker 1: hat and the black outfit. But I just I'm wearing 655 00:34:07,880 --> 00:34:09,319 Speaker 1: a black two shirt right now, and I really don't 656 00:34:09,320 --> 00:34:10,759 Speaker 1: want to be I'm not gonna lie. I don't have 657 00:34:10,800 --> 00:34:14,080 Speaker 1: any clean clothes after coming home from Georgia, but I don't. 658 00:34:14,160 --> 00:34:16,360 Speaker 1: It just doesn't give me life. I wanted sparkle, I 659 00:34:16,400 --> 00:34:18,080 Speaker 1: want it pink. So that's the vibe I went with. 660 00:34:18,160 --> 00:34:20,280 Speaker 1: And I really tried to put my all into my outfit, 661 00:34:20,800 --> 00:34:24,319 Speaker 1: and it was so gratifying that just to know that 662 00:34:24,400 --> 00:34:28,320 Speaker 1: maybe Beyonce saw it. But then I wasn't even able 663 00:34:28,320 --> 00:34:31,360 Speaker 1: to be too disappointed. After her, she passed by and 664 00:34:31,400 --> 00:34:33,759 Speaker 1: her window was up because the next suv rolled by, 665 00:34:34,280 --> 00:34:36,680 Speaker 1: and the second most beautiful face in the world, Blue 666 00:34:36,719 --> 00:34:39,920 Speaker 1: Ivy Carter, is in the window and she's waving, and 667 00:34:40,000 --> 00:34:43,120 Speaker 1: right behind her is baby's sis Roomy. I just, matter 668 00:34:43,120 --> 00:34:44,760 Speaker 1: of fact, by the way, they have their own suv, 669 00:34:44,880 --> 00:34:47,359 Speaker 1: so I know Jay was in the suv with Beyonce then, 670 00:34:47,760 --> 00:34:50,000 Speaker 1: which means maybe Ja, but Jay was probably not even looking. 671 00:34:51,040 --> 00:34:53,600 Speaker 1: But Beyonce rolls by then Blue Ivy and Roomy and 672 00:34:53,640 --> 00:34:57,839 Speaker 1: then they passed by, and then who is it? Number three? 673 00:34:58,040 --> 00:35:02,879 Speaker 1: Mama Tina, Mama. I don't know who she was riding with, 674 00:35:03,120 --> 00:35:05,759 Speaker 1: but Mama Tina had her phone out and she was recording. 675 00:35:06,120 --> 00:35:08,240 Speaker 1: And when she passed by me, I was like, Mama Tina, 676 00:35:08,640 --> 00:35:11,440 Speaker 1: and I swear we made eye contact, and I was like, 677 00:35:11,480 --> 00:35:13,520 Speaker 1: she's recording. I wonder if she's gonna upload it, then 678 00:35:13,520 --> 00:35:15,240 Speaker 1: tell me why. I get on IG the next morning 679 00:35:15,239 --> 00:35:17,120 Speaker 1: and the first thing I see is Mama Tina uploaded 680 00:35:17,160 --> 00:35:20,479 Speaker 1: that video and there I am, my happy ass on 681 00:35:20,600 --> 00:35:26,480 Speaker 1: the street corner, waving like a fool. Martina's just so amazing. 682 00:35:26,600 --> 00:35:29,160 Speaker 1: And I'm just saying, Beyonce and the Carter family, Y'll 683 00:35:29,160 --> 00:35:33,760 Speaker 1: owe me absolutely nothing. I spent seven hundred hard earned 684 00:35:33,760 --> 00:35:35,919 Speaker 1: dollars on that show, and I would spend it again. 685 00:35:36,400 --> 00:35:39,160 Speaker 1: Not to mention what I spent in London doesn't even matter. 686 00:35:40,000 --> 00:35:42,319 Speaker 1: Maybe my brown boosh is just gonna be. This is 687 00:35:42,320 --> 00:35:44,640 Speaker 1: what the money is for. Find you in experience like 688 00:35:44,680 --> 00:35:47,840 Speaker 1: the one that Find you in experience that brings you 689 00:35:47,840 --> 00:35:52,359 Speaker 1: as much joy as Beyonce's shows do for me, and 690 00:35:52,400 --> 00:35:57,480 Speaker 1: then do everything you can to experience listings again. So 691 00:35:57,760 --> 00:36:00,680 Speaker 1: if that's a sporting event, if it's going the US Open, 692 00:36:00,719 --> 00:36:02,719 Speaker 1: the Super Bowl, like, I don't know what are y'all 693 00:36:02,760 --> 00:36:06,480 Speaker 1: into out there. If whatever that thing is that lights 694 00:36:06,520 --> 00:36:09,920 Speaker 1: you up, that becomes your reason why. It becomes so 695 00:36:10,040 --> 00:36:13,399 Speaker 1: much easier to say no to everything else that could 696 00:36:13,400 --> 00:36:16,160 Speaker 1: distract you from your goals financially when you know what 697 00:36:16,200 --> 00:36:21,440 Speaker 1: you were striving for. And for me, it's like okay, kids, health, family, 698 00:36:21,719 --> 00:36:24,719 Speaker 1: and then Beyonce tickets, like that's the north start for 699 00:36:24,800 --> 00:36:27,400 Speaker 1: me forever and always. All right, but let me do 700 00:36:27,440 --> 00:36:29,719 Speaker 1: a real bron boot brown break. I'm gonna do a 701 00:36:29,760 --> 00:36:33,000 Speaker 1: break for let me look this up really quick because 702 00:36:33,680 --> 00:36:38,680 Speaker 1: dad da dada, Oh right, fine, I'm like Black women's 703 00:36:38,680 --> 00:36:42,640 Speaker 1: equal paydays last week was last week, and I know 704 00:36:42,680 --> 00:36:44,440 Speaker 1: everybody wants me to be depressed about it and talk 705 00:36:44,480 --> 00:36:48,160 Speaker 1: about how black women have to work an extra seventy 706 00:36:48,239 --> 00:36:51,120 Speaker 1: eleven hundred days in order to earn what a mediocre 707 00:36:51,160 --> 00:36:53,799 Speaker 1: white man earns. But like I said on Instagram, like 708 00:36:53,880 --> 00:36:56,319 Speaker 1: I'm really not too pressed. I don't want to spend 709 00:36:56,320 --> 00:36:59,400 Speaker 1: too much time covering headlines like that because Okay, it's 710 00:36:59,440 --> 00:37:01,839 Speaker 1: important to know that that's still happening, but also like 711 00:37:02,440 --> 00:37:05,560 Speaker 1: it's irrelevant to us, like ba fam, it's irrelevant to us. 712 00:37:05,560 --> 00:37:08,080 Speaker 1: You're listening to the show, you're listening to me, You're 713 00:37:08,080 --> 00:37:10,920 Speaker 1: getting your career, getting your negotiation advice, you're getting your 714 00:37:10,920 --> 00:37:14,239 Speaker 1: money together. It's almost too relevant to us what the 715 00:37:14,360 --> 00:37:17,080 Speaker 1: norm is for women of color because we're not the norm. Like, 716 00:37:17,120 --> 00:37:20,759 Speaker 1: we're here gathering in this space that Brown Ambition has 717 00:37:20,760 --> 00:37:23,040 Speaker 1: offered us and created for us. And why I made 718 00:37:23,080 --> 00:37:26,280 Speaker 1: this space for us, you know, ten years ago with Tiffany, 719 00:37:26,400 --> 00:37:29,920 Speaker 1: is because we are here to help ourselves and you 720 00:37:30,040 --> 00:37:33,719 Speaker 1: become exceptions to the rule. So although statistics like this 721 00:37:33,840 --> 00:37:36,319 Speaker 1: very much exist, and I know women of color, like 722 00:37:36,360 --> 00:37:38,320 Speaker 1: I know that we are out here and we are struggling. 723 00:37:38,440 --> 00:37:41,160 Speaker 1: And if you're a black woman, you're earning something like 724 00:37:41,200 --> 00:37:44,360 Speaker 1: fifty something cents to the dollar of a white person, 725 00:37:44,520 --> 00:37:47,160 Speaker 1: a white male, And if you're a Latina it's even 726 00:37:47,239 --> 00:37:51,759 Speaker 1: less than that, is it fifty cents? I know that 727 00:37:51,800 --> 00:37:54,120 Speaker 1: if you're a black woman you're earning something like sixty 728 00:37:54,160 --> 00:37:56,359 Speaker 1: cents or seventy cents to the dollar of a white man. 729 00:37:56,400 --> 00:37:59,560 Speaker 1: If you're a Latina, it's even worse. Listen, I know 730 00:37:59,640 --> 00:38:02,680 Speaker 1: that at the same time, we are here to create 731 00:38:02,719 --> 00:38:06,520 Speaker 1: exceptions to those rules. We are not here to internalize 732 00:38:06,719 --> 00:38:09,560 Speaker 1: data points like that. In fact, almost to a certain extent, 733 00:38:09,600 --> 00:38:11,520 Speaker 1: I wish we would stop giving them as much press 734 00:38:11,520 --> 00:38:16,239 Speaker 1: as we do. I want people in decision making positions, 735 00:38:16,440 --> 00:38:19,279 Speaker 1: you know, at businesses and on Capitol Hill. I want 736 00:38:19,280 --> 00:38:23,200 Speaker 1: them to understand the pay inequality gap. I want them 737 00:38:23,239 --> 00:38:26,840 Speaker 1: to understand that black and brown women are chronically underpaid 738 00:38:27,160 --> 00:38:29,719 Speaker 1: compared to our white counterparts. It's important for y'all to 739 00:38:29,800 --> 00:38:31,960 Speaker 1: understand that it's not important for me to dwell on that. 740 00:38:32,160 --> 00:38:34,160 Speaker 1: It's not important for you and me to dwell on that, 741 00:38:34,560 --> 00:38:38,680 Speaker 1: and to steep and stew in that feeling that I 742 00:38:38,680 --> 00:38:42,600 Speaker 1: think a capitalistic society really benefits from us feeling, which 743 00:38:42,640 --> 00:38:45,279 Speaker 1: is as if this is the only path for us, 744 00:38:45,280 --> 00:38:48,000 Speaker 1: this is the only outcome. That because the average is 745 00:38:48,040 --> 00:38:50,040 Speaker 1: such and such, then we have to expect that or 746 00:38:50,080 --> 00:38:52,400 Speaker 1: even less, or if we get a little bit above 747 00:38:52,440 --> 00:38:54,880 Speaker 1: that average or even hit that average, that we should 748 00:38:54,880 --> 00:38:58,839 Speaker 1: be grateful because this is the average for everyone. So well, 749 00:38:58,880 --> 00:39:02,680 Speaker 1: we got here, so I guess we're doing okay. Unfortunately, 750 00:39:02,960 --> 00:39:06,759 Speaker 1: you're listening to brown ambition and the ambitious part of 751 00:39:06,880 --> 00:39:09,640 Speaker 1: our nature. The reason why we created this show when 752 00:39:09,680 --> 00:39:12,759 Speaker 1: we did ten years ago is because we are embracing 753 00:39:13,040 --> 00:39:16,880 Speaker 1: the fact that the status quo, the norm, does not 754 00:39:16,960 --> 00:39:19,040 Speaker 1: have to be our reality, and that it is okay. 755 00:39:19,560 --> 00:39:21,440 Speaker 1: It is safe even and I want to say that 756 00:39:21,480 --> 00:39:23,920 Speaker 1: it is safe for us to expect more from ourselves. 757 00:39:24,520 --> 00:39:27,160 Speaker 1: It is safe, and it is possible for us to 758 00:39:27,200 --> 00:39:29,880 Speaker 1: expect more for ourselves and for us to create the 759 00:39:29,920 --> 00:39:33,799 Speaker 1: exceptions to the damn rules. So thank you BA Fan 760 00:39:34,040 --> 00:39:37,640 Speaker 1: for listening to this week's episode of Brown Ambition, Thanks 761 00:39:37,680 --> 00:39:39,759 Speaker 1: for listening to the Brown Table. Thanks for giving me 762 00:39:39,840 --> 00:39:42,040 Speaker 1: this platform. I could not do it without you, and 763 00:39:42,520 --> 00:39:44,200 Speaker 1: I want to hear from you. You can leave me 764 00:39:44,239 --> 00:39:45,799 Speaker 1: a comment, you can leave me a review. You can 765 00:39:45,840 --> 00:39:49,040 Speaker 1: also just email me directly. I'm at Brown Ambition Podcast 766 00:39:49,800 --> 00:39:52,680 Speaker 1: on Instagram. You can also email me Brown Ambition Podcast 767 00:39:52,719 --> 00:39:56,279 Speaker 1: at gmail dot com. You can join our Patreon don't 768 00:39:56,280 --> 00:39:59,239 Speaker 1: forget Patreon. You can join as an unpaid member and 769 00:39:59,320 --> 00:40:02,640 Speaker 1: I'll drop in some previews of upcoming shows and I'll 770 00:40:02,640 --> 00:40:05,719 Speaker 1: talk to y'all in the little chat. But oh, you 771 00:40:05,760 --> 00:40:08,080 Speaker 1: can also join the book club. Brian Ambishon has a 772 00:40:08,120 --> 00:40:10,680 Speaker 1: book club. John know that. And our first pick of 773 00:40:11,000 --> 00:40:14,040 Speaker 1: the summer was this little gem right here, got it 774 00:40:14,120 --> 00:40:17,400 Speaker 1: right here Cibo Campbell Sky Full of Elephants, Meanwhile, this 775 00:40:17,520 --> 00:40:20,560 Speaker 1: is the most overdue library book in the in the 776 00:40:20,600 --> 00:40:24,640 Speaker 1: history of man. Okay, it's not that overdue. I got 777 00:40:24,640 --> 00:40:27,359 Speaker 1: to get the real hard copy though. But we're reading 778 00:40:27,400 --> 00:40:30,399 Speaker 1: Sky Full of Elephants by Cebo Campbell. And if you're 779 00:40:30,400 --> 00:40:32,399 Speaker 1: in the Patreon, you don't have to be a paid 780 00:40:32,440 --> 00:40:34,320 Speaker 1: member to join the book club. Anybody can join the 781 00:40:34,320 --> 00:40:37,080 Speaker 1: book club, but do join the patreon because when I 782 00:40:37,120 --> 00:40:40,160 Speaker 1: have Cebo, he's coming to the book club in the 783 00:40:40,200 --> 00:40:41,840 Speaker 1: next week or two. So you have to be in 784 00:40:41,840 --> 00:40:44,880 Speaker 1: the patreon if you want to get a free invite 785 00:40:44,920 --> 00:40:48,360 Speaker 1: and a free ticket to that author series, author Q 786 00:40:48,480 --> 00:40:50,200 Speaker 1: and a that I'm going to do with Cibo himself. 787 00:40:50,560 --> 00:40:53,600 Speaker 1: I can't wait to talk about this book. If you 788 00:40:53,600 --> 00:40:56,000 Speaker 1: haven't read yet, there's still time y'all can catch up. 789 00:40:56,320 --> 00:41:00,840 Speaker 1: So go to patreon, dot co dot com, lash Brown Ambition, 790 00:41:01,200 --> 00:41:03,279 Speaker 1: check the show notes. It's in there somewhere. You can 791 00:41:03,400 --> 00:41:06,440 Speaker 1: join the Patreon and then please join us when we 792 00:41:06,640 --> 00:41:09,399 Speaker 1: bring Sebo into the patreons, we can have a little 793 00:41:09,440 --> 00:41:12,760 Speaker 1: chit chat. But his incredible novel and what comes next? 794 00:41:13,080 --> 00:41:16,719 Speaker 1: All right, ba fam, I am Mandy Money. I'm gonna 795 00:41:16,760 --> 00:41:20,239 Speaker 1: leave it there. Continue to have a wonderful summer. Thank 796 00:41:20,280 --> 00:41:22,680 Speaker 1: you again for all the support for the show, sending 797 00:41:22,680 --> 00:41:27,520 Speaker 1: all lots of love. Bye okay Va fam. Thank you 798 00:41:27,600 --> 00:41:29,960 Speaker 1: so much for listening to this week's show. I want 799 00:41:30,000 --> 00:41:34,560 Speaker 1: to shout out to our production team, Courtney, our editor, Carla, 800 00:41:34,719 --> 00:41:38,680 Speaker 1: our fearless leader for idea to launch productions. I want 801 00:41:38,680 --> 00:41:42,960 Speaker 1: to shout out my assistant Lauda Escalante and Cameron McNair 802 00:41:43,360 --> 00:41:45,640 Speaker 1: for helping me put the show together. It is not 803 00:41:46,080 --> 00:41:49,440 Speaker 1: a one person project, as much as I have tried 804 00:41:49,480 --> 00:41:53,000 Speaker 1: to make it so these past ten years. I need help, y'all, 805 00:41:53,400 --> 00:41:55,640 Speaker 1: and thank goodness I've been able to put this team 806 00:41:55,760 --> 00:41:58,520 Speaker 1: around me to support me on this journey and to 807 00:41:58,640 --> 00:42:01,720 Speaker 1: y'all bea fam. I love you so so so so much. 808 00:42:02,360 --> 00:42:04,880 Speaker 1: Please rate, review, subscribe, make sure your sign up to 809 00:42:04,920 --> 00:42:08,520 Speaker 1: the newsletter to get all the latest updates on upcoming episodes, 810 00:42:08,600 --> 00:42:13,759 Speaker 1: our tenth year anniversary celebrations to come, and until next time, 811 00:42:14,120 --> 00:42:16,360 Speaker 1: talk to you soon via buye