WEBVTT - #100 F Everybody! 0:00:01.040 --> 0:00:08.640 Start up, start up, Brooklyn Buy start Up, Brooklyn buys 0:00:10.320 --> 0:00:22.439 dat Up. They're making noise Data dot up episode. Whoa, 0:00:23.360 --> 0:00:26.400 it's the Brooklyn Boys podcast with us. We made it. 0:00:27.040 --> 0:00:31.920 They said it wouldn't happen, but somehow we fell into this. 0:00:32.159 --> 0:00:34.880 I mean we We also said it wouldn't happen. We 0:00:35.080 --> 0:00:38.200 predicted we would be canceled, right, even though you can't 0:00:38.200 --> 0:00:40.760 cancel the podcast, Well, we could cancel ourselves. We could 0:00:40.760 --> 0:00:42.640 have been canceled, could have fallen apart like fed j 0:00:42.680 --> 0:00:45.080 Ham did. We could have been canceled on social media. 0:00:45.120 --> 0:00:46.960 You don't want that to happen. No, don't get canceled 0:00:47.000 --> 0:00:49.440 on social Some assholes tried to cancel me last week, 0:00:49.479 --> 0:00:53.080 but I fought him back over that baseball thing. Canceled, canceled, no, 0:00:53.360 --> 0:00:55.640 no cancel, can subscribe. One guy was like, let's drag 0:00:55.720 --> 0:00:58.280 this guy. You can't drag me. Un subscribe subscribe. We 0:00:58.360 --> 0:01:00.600 do that with our friends. I actually have quan friends, 0:01:00.640 --> 0:01:05.000 as you know, which I know you're jealous of Brooklyn Crew. 0:01:05.240 --> 0:01:08.199 We have a we have for some reason, they're living 0:01:08.240 --> 0:01:13.640 in UH so it's a group email. It's annoying as fuck, 0:01:13.880 --> 0:01:15.640 and then the group emails go back and forth, and 0:01:15.680 --> 0:01:18.720 it's all ship talking football stuff because we have a 0:01:18.800 --> 0:01:23.400 Patriots fan amongst us. And after it goes back and forth, 0:01:24.040 --> 0:01:26.280 you know, on a Friday or Monday, when they play 0:01:26.560 --> 0:01:28.680 one of the Monday Morning Quarterback and all that bullshit, 0:01:29.120 --> 0:01:33.360 they start writing on the email unsubscribe, unsubscribe, unsubscribe that 0:01:33.520 --> 0:01:39.840 the nineties version of canceled, cancel cancel. Hey, so here 0:01:39.880 --> 0:01:43.640 we are an episode one hundred. No balloons, no party favors. No, 0:01:43.800 --> 0:01:45.880 we said, we said something Elvis like, is there a cake, 0:01:46.520 --> 0:01:50.880 no card, no acknowledgement either. All right, well here's what 0:01:50.920 --> 0:01:53.280 I'll say. We got nothing. Well that's not true. This 0:01:53.440 --> 0:01:57.200 is not we We did predict back in episode seventies 0:01:57.360 --> 0:01:59.760 something that episode one hundred would be done in a 0:01:59.840 --> 0:02:03.000 h W jun atorium or a comedy comedy club. Well 0:02:03.040 --> 0:02:05.120 they fired, They fired the guy, and everyone was gonna 0:02:05.120 --> 0:02:07.480 get free dessert, right they fired. Okay, so we were 0:02:07.600 --> 0:02:10.959 up to episode I want to say, eighty nine and 0:02:11.040 --> 0:02:13.560 scary and I went to the sales team and we said, listen, 0:02:14.800 --> 0:02:18.320 we have this idea. Carolines on Broadway, greatest comedy club 0:02:18.400 --> 0:02:21.120 on the planet, at least in the industry, in the 0:02:21.160 --> 0:02:23.519 business it's respected, it's respected as one of the best 0:02:24.120 --> 0:02:28.720 as the West Coast. That's not true, not true. Close. No, 0:02:29.040 --> 0:02:31.000 Seinfeld got his start on the East Coast. Jay Leno 0:02:31.080 --> 0:02:33.200 on East coasts. So it's the East Coast Comedy Store, 0:02:33.320 --> 0:02:37.079 or it's the East Coast laugh Carolines. It's East Coast Carolines. 0:02:37.120 --> 0:02:39.200 That's it. That's all. You gotta say it. And I'll 0:02:39.240 --> 0:02:41.240 be there this weekend to see my friend Chris Hardwick 0:02:41.320 --> 0:02:44.440 from Talking Dead by the way, episode one fifty eight 0:02:44.480 --> 0:02:47.640 of Walkers and Talkers plug plug. Uh, we interviewed Chris 0:02:47.720 --> 0:02:52.080 Hardwick in studio, so please check that out log log anyway, 0:02:52.160 --> 0:02:53.919 So I said, we went to sales and we said, listen, 0:02:53.960 --> 0:02:55.720 we want to do a live thing, because you can't 0:02:55.760 --> 0:02:57.519 just call a comedy club up because the comedy club 0:02:57.639 --> 0:02:59.160 that wants to get paid or they wouldn't know how 0:02:59.160 --> 0:03:01.600 they're gonna make money at the deal. So he said, okay, 0:03:01.680 --> 0:03:03.919 work it out. So the sales guys work it out 0:03:04.320 --> 0:03:07.720 with sponsors and whatever whatever it is, ticket sales, whatever 0:03:07.840 --> 0:03:10.160 they promise you the world. So we said we want 0:03:10.160 --> 0:03:12.720 to do Carolines. All right, great, So he came back 0:03:12.760 --> 0:03:14.200 to me a week later and goes, I have another 0:03:14.240 --> 0:03:15.919 comedy club that would like you to do the show 0:03:16.000 --> 0:03:18.239 from there. I said, well, what's the what's the what's 0:03:18.280 --> 0:03:20.920 the pitch, what's why? Oh well, they have a studio 0:03:21.000 --> 0:03:22.840 on the second floor where you can do a podcast 0:03:23.200 --> 0:03:25.160 and then you'll come down and then you'll interact with 0:03:25.240 --> 0:03:27.200 the crowd. What was that name. I'm not gonna just 0:03:27.280 --> 0:03:29.519 in case it comes through. I don't worry. It's still so, 0:03:29.600 --> 0:03:31.400 I said, not really my first choice to do a 0:03:31.440 --> 0:03:34.400 podcast upstairs where nobody is there, and then come down 0:03:34.480 --> 0:03:37.360 and be like, hey, guys, we did a podcast. Carolines 0:03:37.480 --> 0:03:39.240 wants to have us do the podcast like right there 0:03:39.280 --> 0:03:42.680 on the stage where everybody could watch. Okay, that would 0:03:42.680 --> 0:03:45.160 be ideal that here's the Carolines already worked out free 0:03:45.160 --> 0:03:48.640 to say were planning on. That's all we wanted. Free 0:03:48.640 --> 0:03:52.400 deserve everybody. But so the guy working on the mastermind 0:03:52.720 --> 0:03:54.600 working on it, he's the guy that's working on the 0:03:54.720 --> 0:03:58.240 railroad all the live long day. He got fired by 0:03:58.560 --> 0:04:03.600 let him go canceled actually because subscribe subscribe I don't like, 0:04:04.280 --> 0:04:07.360 partially because he didn't get this deal done and partially 0:04:07.400 --> 0:04:08.920 because that was the thing. He didn't get a lot 0:04:08.920 --> 0:04:12.200 of deals done, and so the new guy isn't up 0:04:12.240 --> 0:04:15.200 to speed yet and couldn't get the deal finalized. So 0:04:15.320 --> 0:04:18.640 although people are like where starting to become this this 0:04:18.800 --> 0:04:22.200 is starting to sound like my previous podcast where we 0:04:22.600 --> 0:04:26.320 delivered empty promises. Well, empty promises was was a running 0:04:26.440 --> 0:04:30.160 theme on my old podcast with the Jersey Kid. So 0:04:30.240 --> 0:04:32.320 I want to say that this is now, this is 0:04:32.360 --> 0:04:35.800 a giant empty promise. This one, this, this one is 0:04:35.839 --> 0:04:39.039 like out there, this is a big fat it's highlighted, 0:04:39.520 --> 0:04:42.280 it's it's really all the lights and it's all on this. 0:04:42.839 --> 0:04:46.600 This is speaking of empty promises. A couple of our 0:04:46.640 --> 0:04:48.480 slices were talking on Twitter and of course I was 0:04:48.520 --> 0:04:50.840 copied to it like, oh, I'm gonna put together a 0:04:50.880 --> 0:04:53.440 list for the hundredth episode of all the rants Brody 0:04:53.480 --> 0:04:55.680 promise they never got to And I said, well, that's 0:04:55.680 --> 0:04:57.600 not fair because I didn't, it doesn't mean I'm not 0:04:57.640 --> 0:04:59.680 going to get to them. There's just a flow of 0:04:59.720 --> 0:05:01.880 the kiss. Sometimes we have like, oh, we have all 0:05:01.880 --> 0:05:04.920 the stuff we want to talk about. Okay, now here's 0:05:04.920 --> 0:05:07.240 the thing we're can talk about the float chart. But 0:05:07.480 --> 0:05:09.400 as you can on your point, can stand on stay 0:05:09.440 --> 0:05:11.440 on your point, Okay, no, because the flow chart shows 0:05:11.440 --> 0:05:13.720 how we get distracted. Now, the flow chart that we're 0:05:13.760 --> 0:05:16.320 gonna post on our social media was sent to us 0:05:16.360 --> 0:05:19.280 by one of our slices. We'll credit that in a minute, 0:05:19.720 --> 0:05:22.480 but they didn't create it. It's actually by somebody who 0:05:22.520 --> 0:05:26.840 has a D H T. Right, A D A D 0:05:27.240 --> 0:05:29.880 d H D R H D and H is an 0:05:29.880 --> 0:05:31.600 alarm cut. That's correct. That yeah, well that's a d 0:05:31.680 --> 0:05:38.000 T that's okay, but not the alarm. I did not 0:05:38.279 --> 0:05:43.159 self promote by the I stand for we played match 0:05:43.240 --> 0:05:45.880 game today on the show. I wrote the questions where 0:05:46.520 --> 0:05:48.880 and one of the waiting for this to happen on 0:05:48.920 --> 0:05:50.600 the show, and it never did. So one of the 0:05:50.839 --> 0:05:53.240 one of the questions was, this is a true story. 0:05:53.320 --> 0:05:55.400 There's a Mexican restaurant that opened up a spa in 0:05:55.480 --> 0:05:57.640 the back for people to come in and get some 0:05:57.720 --> 0:06:00.520 lunch and get a relaxing massage. So I said, instead 0:06:00.520 --> 0:06:03.960 of using lotion, they massage you with blank And what 0:06:04.120 --> 0:06:08.080 did Gandhi said? He said, they they rubbed them down 0:06:08.120 --> 0:06:14.039 with You would think like hot sauce, squacamole, like liquids. Yeah, 0:06:14.080 --> 0:06:18.520 she said, Lula hot sauce. She named it by names 0:06:20.480 --> 0:06:23.480 are slicest texted in saying hit the jingle, jingle, hit 0:06:23.520 --> 0:06:27.360 the jingle. Well here on our episode. I gotta give 0:06:27.600 --> 0:06:33.440 special props to Cassie grit Savage. Cassie grit Savage wrote 0:06:33.480 --> 0:06:38.559 in her email happy onsode, and then continued to write, 0:06:40.040 --> 0:06:45.240 fuck you everybody we've ever said fuck you. Two. Here's 0:06:45.240 --> 0:06:48.920 the list you have to tell Orchestra pull that up 0:06:48.960 --> 0:06:52.000 please because this is a long, motherfucking list. This is 0:06:52.080 --> 0:06:53.400 the list, like I read, of all the people that 0:06:53.440 --> 0:06:56.159 think you really you really flicked off a lot of people. 0:06:56.960 --> 0:07:00.360 This is from episode Wow, how does one key track 0:07:00.440 --> 0:07:03.320 of all this? I really hope she didn't like I 0:07:03.360 --> 0:07:05.040 hope she didn't have to go back and listen. I 0:07:05.120 --> 0:07:07.600 hope she was just keeping tally along. Get the hits. 0:07:07.680 --> 0:07:09.600 That way, we get the hits. We get it. By 0:07:09.640 --> 0:07:11.880 the way, William Tell, overture not in the system. Just 0:07:12.320 --> 0:07:16.720 just type in tell that's it. That's not the right one. 0:07:16.800 --> 0:07:18.240 But that's okay. I just hit that one. I did. 0:07:18.280 --> 0:07:20.080 I did overture. I did, William, it's not in here, 0:07:20.280 --> 0:07:25.520 William Tell. Let's try this one, okay, do that already? End? 0:07:25.960 --> 0:07:29.440 Hold on, here we go. Fuck you, It's not all, 0:07:29.920 --> 0:07:33.600 it's from a different radio station type in William. Once again, 0:07:33.800 --> 0:07:35.560 as you can hear, as you might might not know, 0:07:35.640 --> 0:07:39.000 we're in the shitty studio again. We're not for episode 0:07:39.040 --> 0:07:41.160 one D. You think we'd be in our regular content 0:07:41.960 --> 0:07:44.880 you we are in the crappy green studio held On 0:07:45.080 --> 0:07:47.800 that you use for your other podcasts and talkers episode 0:07:48.640 --> 0:07:51.760 Dwick and I gotta say I'm not happy hold On. 0:07:52.120 --> 0:07:54.000 Not only do we not have an audience in front 0:07:54.000 --> 0:07:56.960 of us doing this live from a comedy club like 0:07:57.040 --> 0:08:00.760 you were sitting in here with this with the the studio, 0:08:00.800 --> 0:08:02.640 we're going backwards in Todd. But here's the thing that 0:08:03.320 --> 0:08:06.720 this is EPs. This is not clamorous. This is not 0:08:08.040 --> 0:08:10.760 what I would would have Nobody likes a rant. Can 0:08:10.800 --> 0:08:14.400 you just calm down? Okay? That audio that William tell 0:08:14.440 --> 0:08:17.880 overture is owned by light FM, so I had to 0:08:17.960 --> 0:08:21.280 like approve it for our station. Your version that we've 0:08:21.320 --> 0:08:23.640 had for twenty something years not in the system anymore. 0:08:24.080 --> 0:08:26.680 That's the not the studio's problem. That's the that's the 0:08:26.760 --> 0:08:31.560 audio vault of here we go. Fuck you, Agnes Stacy 0:08:31.640 --> 0:08:35.640 A seventy seven, Henry Sue, Vinnie Special k Waiter Guy 0:08:35.760 --> 0:08:40.560 and Tessa Asian West Chief Original Boston Pizza, The Royals, 0:08:41.000 --> 0:08:45.600 Ainsley Uber, Pelican Foods, Pelican Pools, Rather Stu Anthony security Guard, 0:08:45.679 --> 0:08:50.040 Todd Andy, Andy's Dad, Lose Fake Stephen, Tara Chips, Old People, 0:08:50.120 --> 0:08:56.400 American Airlines, Cat Scary, Alexa, United Airlines, Unfunck You American Airlines, 0:08:56.800 --> 0:09:00.600 Randy Leo and Big Chuck, Jeff Paul, Jasmine, Gataco, Bell 0:09:00.640 --> 0:09:05.560 Weather Channel, Sky sun Cast, Facebook, Fran wrong picture, Peter Rosita, 0:09:05.600 --> 0:09:10.480 Shaniqua with no You, Edna, no name tag, Hello, Where's 0:09:10.520 --> 0:09:15.080 my William tell overture bitch continuing along, Fuck you Foo 0:09:15.160 --> 0:09:20.920 Foo Chinese restaurant, Ernie Roberta Akta Insurance company, who saves 0:09:20.960 --> 0:09:22.400 me money if I get on the phone with you 0:09:22.520 --> 0:09:27.200 for fifteen minutes? Panatronics, Philip Sonicare Exit twenty Exit twenty one, 0:09:27.320 --> 0:09:31.199 Mike Boulevard, Sullivan, New Jersey Home dot Com, Maria, Kevin 0:09:31.240 --> 0:09:40.400 Andrew Hercules, Delivery Chantel, Margot, Rebecca and Mark funk All 0:09:40.480 --> 0:09:45.920 y'all anyway, Patsy is is going to meet the Brooklyn 0:09:46.000 --> 0:09:49.200 Boys at the New York City Wine and Food Festival 0:09:49.280 --> 0:09:52.040 this Thursday. At the Elvis Durran Book Party, which we're 0:09:52.040 --> 0:09:54.720 gonna be doing. She cannot wait to meet everybody. God 0:09:54.920 --> 0:09:59.200 she and she wants us to sign Elvis's book if possible, 0:09:59.640 --> 0:10:02.640 has egg Slice for Life. Cassie grit Savage from Syracuse 0:10:03.160 --> 0:10:05.599 driving down to New York City. By the way, you 0:10:05.640 --> 0:10:08.480 can buy your tickets for that event at NYC wf 0:10:08.640 --> 0:10:10.839 F dot org. Brody and I will be there. I 0:10:10.920 --> 0:10:14.280 don't know how respectful it is to signing Elvis. That's 0:10:14.400 --> 0:10:17.240 my problem. That's where it gets a little dicey. So 0:10:17.520 --> 0:10:20.200 Elvis had a book signing last night in northern New Jersey, 0:10:20.600 --> 0:10:23.000 maybe a half hour from my house, and a couple 0:10:23.040 --> 0:10:25.200 of people said, hey, you're gonna be there. If you are, 0:10:25.280 --> 0:10:27.000 i'd love you to sign my copy of the book. 0:10:27.520 --> 0:10:30.040 Here's the thing. I will take a picture of you 0:10:30.160 --> 0:10:33.040 holding with me with the book, not together. But I 0:10:33.080 --> 0:10:36.360 didn't write the book. And although I'm in there three times, 0:10:36.520 --> 0:10:42.679 I think three or four times, it's his book, remember folks, 0:10:42.760 --> 0:10:45.439 by the book right, Life, Life Out. What's it called. 0:10:45.920 --> 0:10:52.080 It's called it's called in um stories Stories. I sort 0:10:52.120 --> 0:10:54.120 of remember from a life, Live Out, Lived out Right. 0:10:54.920 --> 0:10:58.720 Elvis Duran book dot com is everywhere where good Elvis 0:10:58.840 --> 0:11:01.679 is gonna be something books. Uh, page sixty seven is 0:11:01.679 --> 0:11:05.079 all you need to know. But but but yeah, I'm like, 0:11:05.160 --> 0:11:08.000 I can't sign Tough Cassie. Cassie will see you there. 0:11:08.040 --> 0:11:09.959 We love you, Thank you for that. That was a 0:11:10.040 --> 0:11:11.920 hell of a list. But I don't know if we 0:11:12.000 --> 0:11:15.720 could sign Elvis. It's weird. I feel a word, it's 0:11:15.760 --> 0:11:19.440 just not right. I just think it shows disrespect right 0:11:19.480 --> 0:11:22.079 where like when my book comes out, you know you 0:11:22.160 --> 0:11:25.079 want my paws all over it. Well, it depends on 0:11:25.120 --> 0:11:26.800 if I if I use a lot of podcast stories, 0:11:27.080 --> 0:11:29.440 then I would have you write the foreword or something 0:11:29.480 --> 0:11:31.280 and I'll spell check it. Yeah, maybe we'll do that, 0:11:31.800 --> 0:11:34.280 But I but I don't like, I don't I don't know. 0:11:34.520 --> 0:11:36.839 I don't want to steal any of Elvis's thunder. Like 0:11:36.880 --> 0:11:37.960 that's why I don't want to go to the book 0:11:37.960 --> 0:11:39.640 signing last night, Not that I would steal his thunder. 0:11:39.679 --> 0:11:41.199 I mean, he's the man. But I don't want to 0:11:41.200 --> 0:11:42.679 be like, oh, i'll sign your book too that I 0:11:42.720 --> 0:11:47.439 didn't write. So should we just bring loose leaf paper? 0:11:47.559 --> 0:11:49.160 That's like your friends in a band and you signed 0:11:49.200 --> 0:11:50.720 the album at the record store, like you know, if 0:11:50.720 --> 0:11:54.400 there were record stores anymore. But yeah, yeah, loose leaf paper. 0:11:54.480 --> 0:11:56.280 Just bring loose leaf paper. How about the black and 0:11:56.320 --> 0:11:58.600 white marble notebooks, let's bring let's bring back the eight 0:11:59.200 --> 0:12:03.079 let's do that, or my trapper keeper. I'll sign, I'll 0:12:03.080 --> 0:12:05.440 sign your lunch Bob. I'll bring a yellow legal pad 0:12:05.840 --> 0:12:09.160 and I will sign. I got a notary notary stamp 0:12:09.240 --> 0:12:11.640 on it. Yeah, so, um so yeah, I don't think Listen, 0:12:11.679 --> 0:12:14.360 you guys disagree, that's fine, but we have to live 0:12:14.400 --> 0:12:16.760 with it. Yeah, because then we then Elvis is gonna 0:12:16.880 --> 0:12:19.520 chastise us for signing his book. Yeah. By the way, 0:12:19.559 --> 0:12:22.800 I got I got chastised speaking of the book. Nobody 0:12:22.840 --> 0:12:25.040 told me what the plan was, and now I'm getting 0:12:25.040 --> 0:12:28.839 shipped for it. So okay, and you guys called me off. 0:12:28.880 --> 0:12:31.280 I told the joke, and daniel jokes slate it. So 0:12:31.880 --> 0:12:33.880 this is what happened. I got an email about Danielle too. 0:12:33.920 --> 0:12:37.679 Would keep going. We were talking about Elvis's book right now. 0:12:37.760 --> 0:12:39.760 We all got copies of the book because this cases 0:12:39.760 --> 0:12:42.679 of them. Here and Andrew, Elvis's assistant, part of our 0:12:42.720 --> 0:12:47.040 showy bro, here's your copy. Great, all right, So apparently 0:12:47.160 --> 0:12:50.640 you guys all bought extra copies off of whatever store website. 0:12:51.760 --> 0:12:55.079 I've got four copies, thank you. That's great. I took 0:12:55.080 --> 0:12:58.960 a fifth one for free discount. That's what I said. Yeah, 0:12:59.000 --> 0:13:00.839 the book signing we all, which I'm okay with. Not 0:13:00.920 --> 0:13:02.760 everybody went, by the way to the book signing he 0:13:02.840 --> 0:13:05.480 did on Wednesday at the corporate office, but I went. 0:13:05.760 --> 0:13:08.679 Some of us went, you grabbed the book from the stack, 0:13:08.720 --> 0:13:12.920 and we're like, and then you write, that's what I said, 0:13:12.960 --> 0:13:15.520 that's mine. I told you that I thought I thought 0:13:15.559 --> 0:13:17.960 it the day before. Actually, but but I thought about 0:13:17.960 --> 0:13:21.200 it before he wrote the book. So how about that story? Okay? Anyway, 0:13:21.280 --> 0:13:24.120 so I did not order a book from Amazon. In 0:13:24.200 --> 0:13:25.839 other words, I haven't paid for a copy of the 0:13:25.840 --> 0:13:29.079 book yet I got my copy, and no one in 0:13:29.200 --> 0:13:32.160 my life wants a copy of the book. A couple 0:13:32.200 --> 0:13:34.800 of people wanted Audible, which is a sponsor, and we 0:13:34.880 --> 0:13:38.120 have gift cards for free downloads. Great, so I'm gonna 0:13:38.120 --> 0:13:40.040 download a copy from my mom because that's what she wanted. 0:13:40.640 --> 0:13:42.480 If nobody wants a copy of the book, and I 0:13:42.600 --> 0:13:45.280 have a book already because I got one for free. Now, 0:13:45.320 --> 0:13:47.320 you guys are Brody didn't boy copy of the book. 0:13:47.360 --> 0:13:50.120 He's not supporting Elvis. I gotta say, Brody, I'm offended 0:13:50.160 --> 0:13:52.160 that you didn't buy one copy of the book. I 0:13:52.280 --> 0:13:54.120 do think you're a cheap astor now I'm not sitting 0:13:54.120 --> 0:13:55.800 in front of the otherwise I'll be playing the song. 0:13:55.960 --> 0:13:58.480 That's why I'm not not putting it in. But you know, 0:13:58.640 --> 0:14:02.000 but to me, you're not supporting the cause. Like for instance, 0:14:02.040 --> 0:14:05.560 and I said this off air to Nate earlier, it's 0:14:05.640 --> 0:14:10.079 like your kid is graduating and he's got a yearbook, right, 0:14:10.760 --> 0:14:12.880 and what it's a booster you know, the boosters in 0:14:12.880 --> 0:14:16.640 the back of the yearbook. Your kids graduating, you're gonna 0:14:16.679 --> 0:14:19.040 get a free copy of the book, but you want 0:14:19.080 --> 0:14:22.960 to you gotta pay for boosters to support the yearbook. 0:14:23.760 --> 0:14:28.160 Good luck graduating. You know you know who does that, 0:14:28.280 --> 0:14:33.800 especially to Smile and Stephen. You know who would write 0:14:33.840 --> 0:14:36.480 those ads and put them into the book when my 0:14:36.560 --> 0:14:40.240 daughter graduates. Me. But your analogy is that since you're 0:14:40.320 --> 0:14:42.760 my friend, you should support me and you should put 0:14:42.760 --> 0:14:44.640 an ad in for my daughter. Know that you should. 0:14:44.800 --> 0:14:47.360 You should support the proceeds of the book, support the 0:14:47.400 --> 0:14:50.840 revenue of the book by buying a copy of Okay, 0:14:50.840 --> 0:14:54.800 so you're saying like, if your best Okay, you're let's say, 0:14:54.800 --> 0:14:56.840 your daughters in a band. Yeah, I don't buy girl 0:14:56.920 --> 0:15:00.480 Scout cookies from my kids. You should. But if you're 0:15:00.520 --> 0:15:02.480 doing to buy a couple of boxes, but that's my 0:15:02.680 --> 0:15:05.920 daughter benefiting, right. If you're best friends in a band, yeah, 0:15:05.960 --> 0:15:08.440 you're not gonna buy a copy of his download of 0:15:08.480 --> 0:15:13.440 his album. Is he a struggling artist? Right? And he 0:15:13.760 --> 0:15:16.400 know he's your boy, he's your best friend. Forget about 0:15:16.760 --> 0:15:19.720 where he is. See that's the problem. What you're saying 0:15:19.760 --> 0:15:22.040 to me is you want me to support Elvis. So 0:15:22.200 --> 0:15:24.600 I go to the book signing to support him. I 0:15:25.200 --> 0:15:28.720 tweet and post on Instagram to promote his appearance, and 0:15:29.040 --> 0:15:30.960 any chance I get, I write how good the book is. 0:15:31.120 --> 0:15:33.640 I support the content? Right, you probably even wrote an 0:15:33.640 --> 0:15:36.840 Amazon review I will, well, I can't even buy the book. 0:15:37.360 --> 0:15:40.520 But here's the thing. He doesn't need. The book is 0:15:40.560 --> 0:15:45.240 selling like hotcakes. He doesn't need my money, certainly, right, 0:15:45.320 --> 0:15:47.040 he'll get like what two dollars out of the course 0:15:47.120 --> 0:15:49.680 of the book. I'll buy him breakfast one day. But 0:15:50.080 --> 0:15:52.080 the book company doesn't need my money because they're a 0:15:52.080 --> 0:15:57.320 book company. But it's the idea solidarity of us can 0:15:57.360 --> 0:15:59.240 have an idea that I brought the book. We all 0:15:59.800 --> 0:16:02.320 we all bought several copies of the book. That's great, 0:16:02.720 --> 0:16:05.120 but you should buy at least one. Just what I 0:16:05.280 --> 0:16:07.720 needed four, I got a free copy. You got a 0:16:07.760 --> 0:16:09.280 free cop I know you got a free copy. Can 0:16:09.320 --> 0:16:11.160 all get free copies? I could sucking did the whole 0:16:11.200 --> 0:16:13.360 box in the next year. I could. I could walk 0:16:13.360 --> 0:16:15.080 out of here with seven of them, so I could 0:16:15.120 --> 0:16:17.480 just house them right now and sell them on the street. 0:16:17.560 --> 0:16:19.480 So how what I'm saying, how hard was it for 0:16:19.520 --> 0:16:21.560 you to buy the four copies and not tell Elvis? 0:16:22.560 --> 0:16:24.080 Like you could have just brought the four and kept 0:16:24.160 --> 0:16:26.880 it quiet. You brought the four and like, hey, Elvis, 0:16:27.040 --> 0:16:29.080 I bought four copies in your book to let him 0:16:29.120 --> 0:16:31.160 know that I'm there with him supporting You know, I'm 0:16:31.200 --> 0:16:33.320 there supporting him every morning by working next to him 0:16:33.360 --> 0:16:35.800 and making his show the best it can be. But 0:16:36.040 --> 0:16:38.080 you didn't buy the books to support him. He came 0:16:38.120 --> 0:16:39.960 out You bought the books to let him know you 0:16:40.040 --> 0:16:42.960 bought the books. That's not true. But how does he 0:16:43.040 --> 0:16:47.800 know you brought four copies. I'll show him the receipt Amazon. 0:16:47.960 --> 0:16:50.120 That's my point. He knows you brought four copies because 0:16:50.120 --> 0:16:52.000 you made it a point to tell him. But a 0:16:52.160 --> 0:16:55.200 great a great friend buys them and doesn't say, look 0:16:55.240 --> 0:16:58.640 what I did for you. Yeah, but they would buy 0:16:58.720 --> 0:17:01.320 them period. At least you didn't even do that much. 0:17:01.680 --> 0:17:03.280 You didn't even buy it. You got you just you 0:17:03.440 --> 0:17:06.040 said it yourself. You got the book the day the 0:17:06.080 --> 0:17:09.280 book came out, Andrew handing me a book. Here's your copy, 0:17:09.359 --> 0:17:17.240 Brodie fantastic. I posted it right, But buy a gratuitously 0:17:17.280 --> 0:17:21.600 buy a copy, just a symbolically, buy a copy to 0:17:21.760 --> 0:17:26.080 show that you love this man. You get in the book. 0:17:26.520 --> 0:17:29.440 You think that's the that's the reason why you don't 0:17:29.480 --> 0:17:31.520 want to buy a book. And you don't think that 0:17:31.680 --> 0:17:34.040 money is owed because like I'm in the book, Well 0:17:34.080 --> 0:17:35.840 I get when I get it for free, I don't 0:17:35.880 --> 0:17:38.080 have to pay. No, No, I don't think I I 0:17:38.160 --> 0:17:41.919 don't think I. You've faking grape. So did him el 0:17:42.880 --> 0:17:46.200 like you took the free book? Like holy good, did 0:17:46.240 --> 0:17:48.520 Elvis buy the book out of his own pocket and 0:17:48.600 --> 0:17:51.480 say I'm buying this book. Take a copy? No? But 0:17:51.680 --> 0:17:54.520 like you, you you literally ransacked the store. You didn't 0:17:54.560 --> 0:17:57.280 even you stole a copy at the book signing Winsday 0:17:57.320 --> 0:17:59.640 but at least I bought four more so that justifies 0:17:59.720 --> 0:18:01.399 it as it does so so if I go to 0:18:01.480 --> 0:18:03.520 the store and I'd steal it, I was. I was 0:18:03.560 --> 0:18:06.680 in the audience of the book signing where everyone was 0:18:06.720 --> 0:18:08.560 given a copy, and we were all given a copy 0:18:08.600 --> 0:18:10.760 of the book for free. So I'm gonna take my 0:18:10.880 --> 0:18:13.879 free copy of the book because I was there. But 0:18:13.960 --> 0:18:16.679 I'm still gonna buy the four and and what are 0:18:16.680 --> 0:18:18.560 you can do with them? I'm gonna give one to 0:18:18.640 --> 0:18:21.119 my mother, right to my girlfriend, right. I haven't decided 0:18:21.119 --> 0:18:23.920 who I'm giving the other two yet. Okay, a girlfriend 0:18:23.960 --> 0:18:26.239 that doesn't live with you, right, and she's a big 0:18:26.320 --> 0:18:28.320 fan of the show, so she'll get a copy to 0:18:28.359 --> 0:18:30.919 take home. What about your mother? My mother wants an audible. 0:18:30.960 --> 0:18:32.520 We could just cover that. So she's gonna get a 0:18:32.560 --> 0:18:34.440 download of the book and listen to it on hers 0:18:34.440 --> 0:18:36.560 got to be someone in your life. My kids have 0:18:36.680 --> 0:18:39.200 no interest in reading it, understood. My wife lives with me, 0:18:39.359 --> 0:18:42.880 so I have no I have no siblings. Why don't 0:18:42.880 --> 0:18:45.160 you Okay, why don't you give one to our boys? Bruce? 0:18:45.920 --> 0:18:47.800 He didn't asked me for he's your comedy writing partner. 0:18:47.840 --> 0:18:49.680 I asked him wanted to copy Bruce on the loose 0:18:49.840 --> 0:18:51.719 because they'll probably just get one for free, like everybody 0:18:51.720 --> 0:18:54.280 else in the building got one because everybody's Rantzack. He 0:18:54.359 --> 0:18:57.760 knows box just taking free mail him. Guys just trapped 0:18:57.800 --> 0:18:59.920 them on the elevator and got autographs. They got the 0:19:00.000 --> 0:19:01.840 books are free to of course, because they're the ones 0:19:01.880 --> 0:19:04.880 who deliver those boxes. Right, they cut the boxes, show 0:19:04.960 --> 0:19:07.439 up off the truck. What's this? Open it up? Oh, 0:19:07.520 --> 0:19:09.600 there's a thousand copies of Elvis book. I think I'm 0:19:09.600 --> 0:19:13.600 gonna take one, right, who's gonna notice? But that's fucked up? Okay, 0:19:13.680 --> 0:19:15.960 they don't go buy one too, So buy one? Okay, 0:19:16.000 --> 0:19:17.880 so for you one from so wouldn't have been Okay. 0:19:17.920 --> 0:19:19.560 If I said I bought a copy of Amazon and 0:19:19.600 --> 0:19:21.920 I didn't, I'll go back to my analogy. No, I 0:19:21.960 --> 0:19:24.440 could have said I bought one, but you didn't. But 0:19:24.520 --> 0:19:27.080 I didn't because I'm honest, you're cheap. I didn't know 0:19:27.160 --> 0:19:31.119 all you guys until yesterday I bought copies. There's still time, Brody, 0:19:31.320 --> 0:19:34.280 So go on Amazon. Right, did I say the expiration 0:19:34.400 --> 0:19:36.000 date on buying a book? Okay? You know you could 0:19:36.000 --> 0:19:39.840 still correct this second by actually buying one later tomorrow. 0:19:40.000 --> 0:19:41.760 Let me ask you a question. If the book goes 0:19:41.800 --> 0:19:43.600 on sale in three weeks and I buy it on sale, 0:19:43.640 --> 0:19:45.120 does that make me less of a friend? I think 0:19:45.160 --> 0:19:48.280 we need a Brody book sale jingle update. I think 0:19:48.280 --> 0:19:51.120 we need an update for that sale work on Hordy. 0:19:51.160 --> 0:19:54.040 Have you bought Elvis's book yet? Amazon? Not yet? Right? Yeah, Well, 0:19:54.080 --> 0:19:55.720 we'll check in with you from to ask you a question. 0:19:55.760 --> 0:19:57.040 If it goes on sale in a month and I 0:19:57.080 --> 0:19:58.720 buy it, then am I less of a friend? Or 0:19:58.760 --> 0:20:02.679 am I just smart? I think you're It's okay. If 0:20:02.760 --> 0:20:04.680 it goes on sale, I think you're all right. But 0:20:04.800 --> 0:20:07.080 as long as you as long as you make the gesture, 0:20:07.119 --> 0:20:09.040 and you haven't made a gesture. I haven't had a 0:20:09.080 --> 0:20:10.720 chance to even read it, so it didn't occur to 0:20:10.800 --> 0:20:12.159 me to buy it. I'm not gonna read it yet. 0:20:12.320 --> 0:20:14.080 I think you should buy a copy. Money needs to 0:20:14.119 --> 0:20:18.159 come out of your pocket and go into Who's And 0:20:18.800 --> 0:20:22.920 it's it's just camaraderie. It's the idea of it. It's 0:20:23.720 --> 0:20:26.000