1 00:00:01,360 --> 00:00:04,480 Speaker 1: Time now for today's Strawberry Letter. And if you need 2 00:00:04,519 --> 00:00:08,600 Speaker 1: advice and relationships, dating, work, sex, parenting, and more. Please 3 00:00:08,600 --> 00:00:12,000 Speaker 1: submit your Strawberry Letter to Steve HARVEYFM dot com and 4 00:00:12,080 --> 00:00:15,120 Speaker 1: click submit Strawberry Letter. We could be reading your letter 5 00:00:15,200 --> 00:00:17,000 Speaker 1: live on the air, just like we're going to raise. 6 00:00:20,120 --> 00:00:23,080 Speaker 1: I like to keep in practice, buck Alapa, Hold on tight, 7 00:00:23,120 --> 00:00:24,560 Speaker 1: we got it for you. Here it is. It's the 8 00:00:24,640 --> 00:00:28,200 Speaker 1: Strawberry Letter. Thank you, nephew. Should I cancel the party 9 00:00:28,280 --> 00:00:31,800 Speaker 1: or cancel my girlfriend? Dear Steve Anne Shirley. I've been 10 00:00:31,840 --> 00:00:34,960 Speaker 1: with my girlfriend for ten years and we're having our 11 00:00:35,000 --> 00:00:38,240 Speaker 1: first major issue. When I met my girlfriend, she was 12 00:00:38,360 --> 00:00:40,760 Speaker 1: new in town, so I introduced her to my group 13 00:00:40,760 --> 00:00:43,879 Speaker 1: of friends and their wives. There are four couples that 14 00:00:43,960 --> 00:00:46,800 Speaker 1: hang out and we've all known each other since college. 15 00:00:47,040 --> 00:00:49,560 Speaker 1: The wives were all nice enough to my girlfriend, but 16 00:00:49,760 --> 00:00:53,000 Speaker 1: they've never included her in girls' night out or invited 17 00:00:53,000 --> 00:00:56,200 Speaker 1: her to brunch with them. Whenever we're all together, I 18 00:00:56,320 --> 00:00:59,360 Speaker 1: make sure my girlfriend feels included. But now there is 19 00:00:59,400 --> 00:01:02,480 Speaker 1: a problem that I need to deal with. My girlfriend 20 00:01:02,480 --> 00:01:05,520 Speaker 1: thinks that my best friend's wife flirts with me. I 21 00:01:05,520 --> 00:01:07,960 Speaker 1: will admit that my best friend's wife gets a bit 22 00:01:08,040 --> 00:01:10,680 Speaker 1: out of hand when she's had too much wine, but 23 00:01:10,800 --> 00:01:13,199 Speaker 1: her husband is always around and he thinks it's funny. 24 00:01:13,680 --> 00:01:17,400 Speaker 1: My girlfriend says, as a woman, she sees things differently 25 00:01:17,440 --> 00:01:20,520 Speaker 1: than I do. Last weekend, we all met at the 26 00:01:20,600 --> 00:01:23,039 Speaker 1: park for a friend's birthday and we got on the 27 00:01:23,080 --> 00:01:26,600 Speaker 1: subject of race and politics. My best friend's wife sat 28 00:01:26,680 --> 00:01:29,680 Speaker 1: by me and we talked and agreed on most of 29 00:01:29,720 --> 00:01:33,080 Speaker 1: the issues. My girlfriend was giving me the evil eye 30 00:01:33,160 --> 00:01:37,560 Speaker 1: the whole time, and I was very uncomfortable. When we left, 31 00:01:37,800 --> 00:01:42,640 Speaker 1: my girlfriend was furious. So it's our return to host 32 00:01:42,720 --> 00:01:45,880 Speaker 1: the annual Fourth of July celebration at our house, and 33 00:01:46,000 --> 00:01:49,960 Speaker 1: my girlfriend said, my best friend's wife is not invited, 34 00:01:50,400 --> 00:01:54,760 Speaker 1: but her husband can come. What the hell? How can 35 00:01:54,800 --> 00:01:57,480 Speaker 1: I get my girlfriend to realize that she might be 36 00:01:57,560 --> 00:02:00,520 Speaker 1: the problem? I love her, but I am sick of 37 00:02:00,640 --> 00:02:04,120 Speaker 1: constantly validating her feelings. Should I cancel the Fourth of 38 00:02:04,240 --> 00:02:09,040 Speaker 1: July get together? Or should I cancel my girlfriend? Please advise? 39 00:02:10,000 --> 00:02:14,360 Speaker 1: Are you serious right now? You would cancel your girlfriend 40 00:02:14,400 --> 00:02:18,119 Speaker 1: of ten years over this? I mean, I just got 41 00:02:18,120 --> 00:02:20,800 Speaker 1: to say to that, well, well, well aren't you aren't 42 00:02:20,840 --> 00:02:24,480 Speaker 1: your shallow sir? Aren't you drawing a line in the 43 00:02:24,520 --> 00:02:27,760 Speaker 1: sand and picking sides here and all because you're a 44 00:02:27,760 --> 00:02:31,120 Speaker 1: little uncomfortable right now. I mean, imagine how your girl 45 00:02:31,200 --> 00:02:34,919 Speaker 1: feels now, mind you. I think she's dead wrong. No, 46 00:02:35,040 --> 00:02:38,360 Speaker 1: I'm gonna say this. She's just less than tactful for 47 00:02:38,480 --> 00:02:41,000 Speaker 1: not inviting Miss flirty Pants to your party, but her 48 00:02:41,080 --> 00:02:44,720 Speaker 1: husband can come. Okay, that's awkward for everyone. I get 49 00:02:44,760 --> 00:02:47,679 Speaker 1: that awkward for everyone involved. But that's what old girl 50 00:02:47,720 --> 00:02:51,280 Speaker 1: gets for being so disrespectful to your girlfriend. She's putting 51 00:02:51,280 --> 00:02:53,560 Speaker 1: her foot down. I think you, on the other hand, 52 00:02:53,680 --> 00:02:56,760 Speaker 1: should should be standing by her. You should be supporting 53 00:02:56,800 --> 00:03:00,000 Speaker 1: your girlfriend and not taking their side or anyone else 54 00:03:00,160 --> 00:03:02,760 Speaker 1: a side who comes up against her. You guys have 55 00:03:02,840 --> 00:03:05,880 Speaker 1: been together for ten years. You should have said something 56 00:03:06,000 --> 00:03:09,400 Speaker 1: a long time ago when they never included her socially. 57 00:03:09,639 --> 00:03:12,640 Speaker 1: You knew all about it and said or did nothing. 58 00:03:13,000 --> 00:03:15,480 Speaker 1: These are your friends. She was new in town. You 59 00:03:15,560 --> 00:03:18,760 Speaker 1: introduced her to your group of friends, and they snub 60 00:03:18,800 --> 00:03:21,640 Speaker 1: your girl when they have girls night out, when they 61 00:03:21,680 --> 00:03:25,160 Speaker 1: have brunches and things like that. And this woman openly 62 00:03:25,240 --> 00:03:28,440 Speaker 1: flirts with you in your face, in her face, and 63 00:03:28,560 --> 00:03:32,440 Speaker 1: all you do is eat it up and blame your girl. Why, 64 00:03:32,560 --> 00:03:35,320 Speaker 1: I'll tell you why. I know why because you like it. 65 00:03:35,560 --> 00:03:38,240 Speaker 1: You like the attention she's giving you, and the fact 66 00:03:38,240 --> 00:03:41,000 Speaker 1: that her husband is there and does nothing thinks it's funny. 67 00:03:41,040 --> 00:03:44,600 Speaker 1: That makes it all okay, doesn't it. Meanwhile, your girlfriend 68 00:03:45,000 --> 00:03:48,000 Speaker 1: is feeling some kind of way and she's letting you know. 69 00:03:48,400 --> 00:03:52,040 Speaker 1: And okay, this is a side note here. Why is 70 00:03:52,080 --> 00:03:59,680 Speaker 1: it that men always pretend they don't know when a 71 00:03:59,720 --> 00:04:02,680 Speaker 1: woman and it's checking for them. You guys never know this. 72 00:04:03,040 --> 00:04:13,680 Speaker 1: She was oh when, Oh, no, girl, you're tripping. You're crazy. 73 00:04:13,120 --> 00:04:17,120 Speaker 1: H Come on, knock it off. Guys, you know what's up, 74 00:04:17,120 --> 00:04:19,600 Speaker 1: and so do we? Okay, so do we. That's what 75 00:04:19,720 --> 00:04:22,880 Speaker 1: she's telling you. She feels differently about it because she's 76 00:04:22,880 --> 00:04:25,719 Speaker 1: a woman. So I say to you, sir, if you 77 00:04:25,800 --> 00:04:29,239 Speaker 1: are considering dumping your ten year girlfriend over this stupid mess, 78 00:04:29,279 --> 00:04:32,360 Speaker 1: she's probably better off without you. This is over a party, 79 00:04:32,440 --> 00:04:35,200 Speaker 1: and come on, she's given you ten years more than 80 00:04:35,240 --> 00:04:39,800 Speaker 1: you deserve. That's what I say, Steve. We have a 81 00:04:39,800 --> 00:04:44,680 Speaker 1: difference of opinion here, so we might as well get started. 82 00:04:46,440 --> 00:04:49,559 Speaker 1: Let's just start with the subject of the letter. Should 83 00:04:49,600 --> 00:04:54,200 Speaker 1: I counsel the party? All? Counsel my girlfriend? How's that 84 00:04:54,320 --> 00:04:58,599 Speaker 1: a question? Now? Shirley says, after she's been with you 85 00:04:58,760 --> 00:05:02,960 Speaker 1: ten years. Well, that's why we have a problem right here. 86 00:05:03,680 --> 00:05:09,359 Speaker 1: If you've been the girlfriend after college for ten years, 87 00:05:10,160 --> 00:05:12,359 Speaker 1: has it occurred to you that he don't want you 88 00:05:13,400 --> 00:05:16,680 Speaker 1: for no more than he already getting from you. If 89 00:05:16,720 --> 00:05:19,599 Speaker 1: you've been with a man after college for ten years 90 00:05:19,680 --> 00:05:22,359 Speaker 1: and he ain't asked you to marry him yet, something wrong. 91 00:05:23,640 --> 00:05:27,720 Speaker 1: So let's just start there. Now, let's go on down 92 00:05:27,760 --> 00:05:31,200 Speaker 1: the line. You got this best friend now for oh, 93 00:05:31,279 --> 00:05:34,320 Speaker 1: here's the next part. You introduced to a group of friends, 94 00:05:34,360 --> 00:05:36,640 Speaker 1: and for ten years, they don't ask her to go 95 00:05:37,360 --> 00:05:43,640 Speaker 1: to the happy hour, shopping, to the movie, to brunch. 96 00:05:44,640 --> 00:05:51,200 Speaker 1: They don't like her. They do not like your girlfriend. 97 00:05:52,360 --> 00:05:55,240 Speaker 1: It's something about her that they've all picked up on 98 00:05:55,440 --> 00:05:58,600 Speaker 1: and detected, and they've decided as a group that they 99 00:05:58,640 --> 00:06:03,320 Speaker 1: don't like her. That's why you ain't married. Huh, because 100 00:06:03,360 --> 00:06:07,080 Speaker 1: you didn't detected some things too. Now, this Letta is 101 00:06:07,160 --> 00:06:11,279 Speaker 1: just the last straw. Now, when she gets a little 102 00:06:11,279 --> 00:06:16,000 Speaker 1: bit to drink, you'll admit she's a bit much and 103 00:06:16,160 --> 00:06:19,000 Speaker 1: she'd be saying some wild step and your butt. Your 104 00:06:19,000 --> 00:06:21,799 Speaker 1: boy be right there, your best friend, and he thinks funny, 105 00:06:22,279 --> 00:06:27,839 Speaker 1: what due thanks. It's funny that his girl is hidden 106 00:06:27,880 --> 00:06:31,080 Speaker 1: on another dude because she drops ha ha hi he 107 00:06:31,480 --> 00:06:37,240 Speaker 1: him right? Who finds that funny? There's something wrong with 108 00:06:37,320 --> 00:06:41,440 Speaker 1: this whole little group here. Hold that thought. We'll have 109 00:06:41,520 --> 00:06:43,920 Speaker 1: part two of your response coming up at twenty three 110 00:06:43,960 --> 00:06:47,520 Speaker 1: minutes after the hour. Today's Strawberry letter titles Should I 111 00:06:47,600 --> 00:06:51,120 Speaker 1: cancel the party or cancel my girlfriend? We'll get back 112 00:06:51,120 --> 00:06:56,760 Speaker 1: into it right after this you're listening show, Come on, Steve, 113 00:06:56,880 --> 00:06:59,960 Speaker 1: Let's recap today's Strawberry letters. Should I cancel the party? 114 00:07:00,160 --> 00:07:04,320 Speaker 1: Your cancel my girlfriend? That's that's a crazy question. It is. 115 00:07:05,240 --> 00:07:08,200 Speaker 1: This is just your turn to do a Fourth of July, 116 00:07:08,800 --> 00:07:12,520 Speaker 1: and you're considering canceling not canceling that, but canceling your 117 00:07:12,560 --> 00:07:15,760 Speaker 1: girlfriend who's been your girlfriend from ten years, who you 118 00:07:15,760 --> 00:07:18,720 Speaker 1: don't really want no more that for what she is anyway, 119 00:07:19,520 --> 00:07:21,280 Speaker 1: You don't protect her like you want her to be 120 00:07:21,360 --> 00:07:26,920 Speaker 1: your wife ten years, don't nobody like her. She don't 121 00:07:26,960 --> 00:07:30,239 Speaker 1: go to brunch, have out, and don't invite out ten years. 122 00:07:30,720 --> 00:07:33,560 Speaker 1: And then when y'are all together, you always make sure 123 00:07:33,680 --> 00:07:36,960 Speaker 1: when you're all together that my girlfriend feels included. You're 124 00:07:37,000 --> 00:07:42,720 Speaker 1: forcing her into the bunch but now there's a problem. 125 00:07:42,880 --> 00:07:45,840 Speaker 1: My girlfriend thinks that my best friend wife furt with me, 126 00:07:46,240 --> 00:07:48,360 Speaker 1: and I will admit, when she gets a bit out 127 00:07:48,400 --> 00:07:50,520 Speaker 1: of hand when she's had too much wine and her 128 00:07:50,640 --> 00:07:53,720 Speaker 1: husband always around it, he thinks it's funny. I don't 129 00:07:53,800 --> 00:07:57,160 Speaker 1: understand that right there, How that's funny every damn time 130 00:07:58,120 --> 00:08:04,320 Speaker 1: she gets drunk. I wanted, you don't funny, But like 131 00:08:04,480 --> 00:08:09,040 Speaker 1: Shirley said, you kind of enjoyed that, so you put 132 00:08:09,160 --> 00:08:12,080 Speaker 1: up with it. I bet if it wasn't your best 133 00:08:12,080 --> 00:08:18,720 Speaker 1: friend's girl, I'd better be something to this, the fact 134 00:08:18,720 --> 00:08:22,720 Speaker 1: that your girlfriend has noticed this. Women do see things 135 00:08:22,760 --> 00:08:25,920 Speaker 1: that men don't see it. And Shirley said, why y'all 136 00:08:25,920 --> 00:08:28,760 Speaker 1: always act like y'all don't see it because we don't. 137 00:08:29,960 --> 00:08:33,760 Speaker 1: We actually don't. Hey, let me tell you something. If 138 00:08:33,760 --> 00:08:36,959 Speaker 1: we did, we'd act on it. We don't see it, 139 00:08:37,160 --> 00:08:43,720 Speaker 1: but since you pointed it out, we're looking forward. Okay, okay, 140 00:08:43,840 --> 00:08:46,000 Speaker 1: see you want some of this big daddy? All right? Now, 141 00:08:48,240 --> 00:08:51,680 Speaker 1: what's up with you? See that's what it turned into. Well, 142 00:08:51,840 --> 00:08:56,920 Speaker 1: here's the deal. Uh. Last weekend we all met at 143 00:08:56,960 --> 00:08:59,839 Speaker 1: the park from a friend's birthday. We got on sub 144 00:09:00,280 --> 00:09:03,160 Speaker 1: racing politics and your best friend's wife said, by me, 145 00:09:03,240 --> 00:09:05,640 Speaker 1: and we talked and to greed the most issues. My 146 00:09:05,760 --> 00:09:08,080 Speaker 1: girlfriend was giving you the evil out of the whole time, 147 00:09:08,480 --> 00:09:12,200 Speaker 1: and I was very uncomfortable. You should have moved, got 148 00:09:12,240 --> 00:09:14,839 Speaker 1: your answer off that park bench and we sat on 149 00:09:15,000 --> 00:09:17,880 Speaker 1: the other side. You saw her looking at you, Joe, 150 00:09:17,920 --> 00:09:21,560 Speaker 1: stupid ass, you're gonna stay there. That's why your ass 151 00:09:21,720 --> 00:09:25,640 Speaker 1: was uncomfortable. You saw her looking upside your head talking 152 00:09:25,679 --> 00:09:31,920 Speaker 1: to this drunk HEATHU. Then when we left, your girlfriend 153 00:09:32,040 --> 00:09:35,320 Speaker 1: was furious. So now as y'all's time. The horse host 154 00:09:35,360 --> 00:09:37,679 Speaker 1: the forth of July celebration at your house. And my 155 00:09:37,800 --> 00:09:40,760 Speaker 1: girlfriend said, your best friend wife is not invited, but 156 00:09:40,960 --> 00:09:45,800 Speaker 1: her husband can come. What the hell right? You ain't lying, y'all? 157 00:09:46,000 --> 00:09:49,440 Speaker 1: What the hell your boy can come? But hey man, 158 00:09:50,400 --> 00:09:55,200 Speaker 1: Sheila don't want your wife. Sheila said, I don't even 159 00:09:55,240 --> 00:09:59,280 Speaker 1: know how you say that. Hey girl, hey man, let 160 00:09:59,280 --> 00:10:02,320 Speaker 1: me all. Let you Fourth of julyt thing. Listen. Uh 161 00:10:03,000 --> 00:10:12,040 Speaker 1: you're welcome to come, but uh jacket uh uh uh 162 00:10:12,400 --> 00:10:15,800 Speaker 1: read them, read them read it. Don't want Sheila come. 163 00:10:17,400 --> 00:10:21,199 Speaker 1: Excuse me, I said. My wife said you're welcome, earl, 164 00:10:22,160 --> 00:10:25,040 Speaker 1: you can come down. You know you might do. But 165 00:10:25,920 --> 00:10:29,920 Speaker 1: reader say, uh Sheila can't come. You're gonna come so 166 00:10:30,160 --> 00:10:38,839 Speaker 1: low to the fourth of July. No, no, no, you misunderstanding, dog. 167 00:10:39,200 --> 00:10:42,960 Speaker 1: You could. You could come over, get yourself some qu 168 00:10:43,840 --> 00:10:46,640 Speaker 1: get some drinks. Man, you gonna have some nice music. 169 00:10:48,080 --> 00:10:56,040 Speaker 1: But reader don't want Sheila to come. Yeah, no, no, no, 170 00:10:56,240 --> 00:10:58,599 Speaker 1: well you know because she you know, because you no 171 00:10:58,679 --> 00:11:01,959 Speaker 1: matter where she drank. It's fun. Man. Look, I know 172 00:11:02,080 --> 00:11:05,360 Speaker 1: it's all fun. It don't even bother me. Man, But man, 173 00:11:05,520 --> 00:11:08,319 Speaker 1: my girl be tripping. Man. So look, I don't know 174 00:11:08,400 --> 00:11:11,280 Speaker 1: how we're gonna do this here, but you know you're 175 00:11:11,320 --> 00:11:17,240 Speaker 1: welcome to come because dogs really don't we dogs? But 176 00:11:19,760 --> 00:11:26,520 Speaker 1: ha ha he he, she can't come, cannot come? He 177 00:11:26,880 --> 00:11:31,000 Speaker 1: read it right? How can I get my girlfriend to 178 00:11:31,080 --> 00:11:33,880 Speaker 1: realize that she might be the problem she is? They 179 00:11:33,920 --> 00:11:37,679 Speaker 1: don't invite her nowhere. She's not really that likable to 180 00:11:37,760 --> 00:11:39,839 Speaker 1: the group. None of them girls that say, you know what, 181 00:11:40,240 --> 00:11:44,040 Speaker 1: let's invite read them ain't know what I'm saying that listen, everybody, 182 00:11:45,200 --> 00:11:48,040 Speaker 1: just because she's not married to him, and everybody know 183 00:11:48,160 --> 00:11:51,280 Speaker 1: what else you're doing, dog, and the wives know it, 184 00:11:51,679 --> 00:11:55,640 Speaker 1: so they know that your girl ain't gonna make make 185 00:11:55,960 --> 00:11:59,679 Speaker 1: She ain't gonna make the race, so they all ready 186 00:11:59,760 --> 00:12:02,319 Speaker 1: to cut her out. She ain't the one because you 187 00:12:02,400 --> 00:12:04,760 Speaker 1: because you know, because you know May you're doing your thing. 188 00:12:06,280 --> 00:12:08,560 Speaker 1: But now y'all haven't had this thing at your house. 189 00:12:08,920 --> 00:12:12,160 Speaker 1: She ain't having over there. So your question is what 190 00:12:12,320 --> 00:12:15,360 Speaker 1: do I do? Do I counsel the party or counsel 191 00:12:15,480 --> 00:12:19,400 Speaker 1: my girlfriend? But I'm sick of constantly validating her feelings. 192 00:12:19,840 --> 00:12:22,520 Speaker 1: That's what's wrong. You always got to make her feel 193 00:12:22,600 --> 00:12:25,719 Speaker 1: included in all of that, and you you exhausted. I 194 00:12:25,760 --> 00:12:29,320 Speaker 1: hadn't done that before. Dog, It's exhausting. You always got 195 00:12:29,440 --> 00:12:35,480 Speaker 1: to explain dog dog. She tied dog dog dog dog 196 00:12:35,600 --> 00:12:38,319 Speaker 1: dog dog. She just had a long day and he 197 00:12:38,480 --> 00:12:43,480 Speaker 1: tied of Thatt counsel forth of July or my girlfriend? 198 00:12:45,400 --> 00:12:50,040 Speaker 1: All right, Steve Poster comments, you'll probably be happy. Yeah 199 00:12:50,679 --> 00:12:53,880 Speaker 1: she will too. Poster comments on Today's Strawberry Letter at 200 00:12:53,920 --> 00:12:57,200 Speaker 1: Steve Harvey FM on Instagram and Facebook, and check out 201 00:12:57,240 --> 00:13:00,880 Speaker 1: the Strawberry Letter podcast on demand. You're listening to the 202 00:13:01,120 --> 00:13:02,440 Speaker 1: Day Harvey Morning Show.