WEBVTT - Bonus: Listener Stories, Episode 16

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<v Speaker 1>Family Secrets is a production of I Heart Radio. This January,

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<v Speaker 1>Danny's taking Family Secrets on the road. To get your tickets,

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<v Speaker 1>visit Danny Shapiro dot com. I'm Danny Shapiro and this

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<v Speaker 1>is Family Secrets, the secrets that are kept from us,

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<v Speaker 1>the secrets we keep from others, and the secrets we

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<v Speaker 1>keep from ourselves. I've heard from so many about your

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<v Speaker 1>own family secrets and realize that what we are creating

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<v Speaker 1>for each other on this podcast is a community, a

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<v Speaker 1>community for those who are looking for a safe and

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<v Speaker 1>supportive space to unburden themselves. To that end, we've created

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<v Speaker 1>a number for listeners to call in to record stories

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<v Speaker 1>to share here in this space. This week, I'd like

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<v Speaker 1>to share a few of those stories from our community.

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<v Speaker 1>Thanks for listening. Hi, Danny, Um, I am calling from Ohio. UM.

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<v Speaker 1>I am sixty years old, just turned sixty. All of

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<v Speaker 1>my life I felt as though I did not look

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<v Speaker 1>like um. My birth certificate fathers like him or his family.

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<v Speaker 1>And I'm eight years apart from my brother and six

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<v Speaker 1>years apart from my sister in age. So I had

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<v Speaker 1>questioned that all my life. I in Christmas of eighteen,

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<v Speaker 1>I took it ancestry DNA tests and discovered that my truth,

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<v Speaker 1>my feelings were actually truth. UM, that my who I

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<v Speaker 1>knew as my father all my life was not my father.

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<v Speaker 1>I actually found through then getting a DNA detective to

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<v Speaker 1>help me research it, that I have a half sister

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<v Speaker 1>and a half niece in California, UM, and I was

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<v Speaker 1>given contact information. I contacted her. She knew all about me. UM.

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<v Speaker 1>It was very emotional for me hearing someone say, you're

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<v Speaker 1>my sister. I've known about you since I was sixteen,

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<v Speaker 1>so I am two years older than her I would

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<v Speaker 1>have been eighteen. UM. So I'm still trying to wrap

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<v Speaker 1>my head around how all these people knew about me

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<v Speaker 1>and no one told me, No one slipped ever, and

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<v Speaker 1>everyone is deceased now, my parents, UM, my real father, everyone.

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<v Speaker 1>So I have one elderly cousin to my birth father

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<v Speaker 1>that has been extremely helpful showing me photos and telling

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<v Speaker 1>me stories of my father, my birth father. So it's

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<v Speaker 1>it's been a struggle, a long journey and of an

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<v Speaker 1>emotional roller coaster. And my story goes a lot deeper

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<v Speaker 1>than that. I have love letters my mother wrote. My

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<v Speaker 1>half sister provided me with stacks of love letters she

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<v Speaker 1>wrote during her pregnancy with me, which gave me some

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<v Speaker 1>of the answers to what went on, but still left

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<v Speaker 1>me with more questions. I just wanted to share that,

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<v Speaker 1>and UM, I thank you for listening. Ye him. My

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<v Speaker 1>secret is that I was dating someone on Tinder and

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<v Speaker 1>I got pregnant and I had his day. Um. But

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<v Speaker 1>the real secret is I actually don't know who the

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<v Speaker 1>father is. UM. And this was really really difficult for

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<v Speaker 1>me to expressed to my family. I am from a

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<v Speaker 1>Muslim family, in a practicing Muslim family, and so for

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<v Speaker 1>me to even be pregnant, uh, with anybody's child is

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<v Speaker 1>like a shock anybody's child out of marriage. UM. For

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<v Speaker 1>me to be pregnant with someone's child who I was

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<v Speaker 1>seeing on Tinder is something they probably couldn't have handled.

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<v Speaker 1>So I basically told them a lie about me needing

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<v Speaker 1>someone I had to like. I kind of got married

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<v Speaker 1>to them, we eloped pregnant. I don't think they believe

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<v Speaker 1>it to this day, but UM, that's kind of the

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<v Speaker 1>story that I was I was feeling comfortable telling them. UM.

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<v Speaker 1>If they ever found out that I actually don't know

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<v Speaker 1>who the father is, I think that they would just

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<v Speaker 1>be mind boggle. Mind. Boggle is the word that comes

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<v Speaker 1>to my mind. Um. But it happened, and it happens.

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<v Speaker 1>It happens, um, not just in my face, it happens everybody,

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<v Speaker 1>like all around the world. Where you make certain decisions

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<v Speaker 1>in your life, UM, and you then decide what you're

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<v Speaker 1>going to do with those decisions. UM. And so I

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<v Speaker 1>chose to have the baby, UM. And I am so glad,

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<v Speaker 1>so glad that I had my child. I just adore him,

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<v Speaker 1>I love him to it. I don't know yet how

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<v Speaker 1>I'm going to break it to him that I don't

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<v Speaker 1>know who the father is. But I'll cross that bridge

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<v Speaker 1>when I get to it. Hey, Danny, I found out

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<v Speaker 1>one of our family's secrets about twenty years ago. UM.

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<v Speaker 1>I was married at the time and having a hard

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<v Speaker 1>time conceiving a child myself. And around the same time,

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<v Speaker 1>my sister was going through a hard time and I

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<v Speaker 1>haven't to speak to her childhood friend whom I have

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<v Speaker 1>not had not talked to and cry a long while.

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<v Speaker 1>And she, in the course of conversation, mentioned something about

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<v Speaker 1>having when she was there for my sister's um last

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<v Speaker 1>child when her last child was born, and I mentioned

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<v Speaker 1>my nephew's name, and she kind of realized that I

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<v Speaker 1>didn't know, but she went ahead and told me that no,

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<v Speaker 1>she meant her third child and must only have two.

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<v Speaker 1>And I learned that she had found out she was

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<v Speaker 1>pregnant while she was in between marriages, and it was

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<v Speaker 1>too far along to make any other decision than to

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<v Speaker 1>have the child and give it up for adoption. Of course,

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<v Speaker 1>I was hurt that she hadn't thought of me, knowing

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<v Speaker 1>that that I so desperately wanted a child, But the

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<v Speaker 1>friend explained to me that she had thought of that.

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<v Speaker 1>I thought it would be too difficult to have this

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<v Speaker 1>child be so ever present in her life, so instead

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<v Speaker 1>she chose to um because it maybe up to her

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<v Speaker 1>friend's cousin. To this day, I have never talked about

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<v Speaker 1>it to anyone in my family. I don't know if

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<v Speaker 1>my sister knows that I know. I don't know if

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<v Speaker 1>my mom or my dad had known, or I have

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<v Speaker 1>no idea. UM. Maybe one day I'll get up courage

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<v Speaker 1>to actually ask her. With all this DNA testing, I

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<v Speaker 1>can't help but wonder, one of these days is there

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<v Speaker 1>going to be this kid? This man um piving me

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<v Speaker 1>a message thing? I think I'm part of your family. Well, thanks, Danny,

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<v Speaker 1>I appreciate you're listening to my story, and I look

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<v Speaker 1>forward to hearing other people's stories of If you'd like

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<v Speaker 1>to share your story, call one eight Secret zero and

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<v Speaker 1>record your story. We won't be able to run all

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<v Speaker 1>the stories, but we do want to shine a light

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<v Speaker 1>on as many as we count. The number again is

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<v Speaker 1>one eight eight Secret and then the numeral zero. For

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<v Speaker 1>more podcasts for my heart Radio, visit the I Heart

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<v Speaker 1>Radio app, Apple podcast, or wherever you listen to your

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<v Speaker 1>favorite shows.