Speaker 1: Episode to Save Smarter, not Harder. Welcome to the Brugal
Speaker 1: Friends podcast, where you'll learn to save money, embrace simplicity, rights,
Speaker 1: and liberal your life. Here your host Jen and Jill m.
Speaker 1: Welcome to the Frugal Friends podcast. My name is Jen,
Speaker 1: my name is Jill, and we are bringing you part
Speaker 1: three in our Radical Middle Method series. We are pleased
Speaker 1: to be bringing this into conclusion, into fulfillment because no
Speaker 1: one wants to be here for more than three things.
Speaker 1: Absolutely not energy for done. I can't count higher than that.
Speaker 1: Absolutely shouldn't have to, shouldn't have to. You shouldn't be
Speaker 1: able to get it done in three steps. And and
Speaker 1: we've done it, and it's radical, but it's also just
Speaker 1: the middle. And that's why the last part is save Smarter,
Speaker 1: not Harder, because when you choose efficiency over quantity or magnitude,
Speaker 1: it creates a much more sustainable frugality. And that's what
Speaker 1: we're all about. We're not about doing the most, we're
Speaker 1: about doing the best. And this episode can certainly be
Speaker 1: listened to on its own, but also feel free to
Speaker 1: check out parts one and two that came before this
Speaker 1: for a full picture of the Radical Middle Method and
Speaker 1: be able to implement and find the freedom and flexibility
Speaker 1: for what your own financial plan is going to look like. Absolutely,
Speaker 1: but first, this episode is brought to you by the
Speaker 1: Spending Symposium Audio Flash Sale. Prices are still rising and
Speaker 1: it's becoming increasingly difficult to plan and stick to a budget.
Speaker 1: So that's why we held the Spending Symposium last month
Speaker 1: where we had twenty experts teaching you their tips for
Speaker 1: spending lass and saving better. And while the full access
Speaker 1: pass is no longer available, we do want to give
Speaker 1: you one more opportunity to get the MP three versions
Speaker 1: of all of our expert interviews from this year's summit,
Speaker 1: and wait for it, we're also throwing in last year's
Speaker 1: summit as well, so that's almost forty interviews thirty nine
Speaker 1: to be exact, that you've never heard on the show.
Speaker 1: It's been completely separate from the podcast, so if you
Speaker 1: need more help controlling or spending, check it out. We're
Speaker 1: only offering this audio bundle for a week, so go
Speaker 1: to Frugal Friends podcast dot com slash audio to listen
Speaker 1: to every session. We'll see every session and then purchase
Speaker 1: it and then listen to every session. Nice So if
Speaker 1: you are as geeked out about efficiency as we are.
Speaker 1: Here are a few episodes to queue up after this.
Speaker 1: Episode one hundred how to maintain a hundred percent effort
Speaker 1: on your financial journey I think is kind of a joke,
Speaker 1: but it's a lot about motivation, and then episode one one,
Speaker 1: how do identify and improve spending habits? Because this section
Speaker 1: of the Radical Middle Method is all about being able
Speaker 1: to stick to the financial plan that you just created
Speaker 1: based off the dream life that you just envisioned. So
Speaker 1: this is the natural progression. Because I don't know about you, Jill,
Speaker 1: but I am a planner and we've talked about this
Speaker 1: on the show before. I used to have a problem
Speaker 1: with buying planners, like I just buy a lot of
Speaker 1: planners and I wouldn't use all. I don't know why
Speaker 1: I would buy so many. I only needed one. And
Speaker 1: when I realized that I was writing the same thing
Speaker 1: in multiple planners, that was when my problem was solved
Speaker 1: for me. But I am a planner and I'm not
Speaker 1: always the best executor. So this is why I'm so
Speaker 1: passionate about this portion of the method, because we include
Speaker 1: psychology and efficiency and productivity methods to help you stick
Speaker 1: to the plan. That you've created. Yeah, and I think
Speaker 1: it's a recognition that we are whole people. No part
Speaker 1: of our personhood is disconnected from the other, and so
Speaker 1: being able to recognize all of the things that go
Speaker 1: into saving, spending, decision making, even relationships that play a
Speaker 1: massive part in our saving and spending, whether it's going
Speaker 1: out with people or managing finances with a partner or
Speaker 1: within a family. There's so many layers and level So
Speaker 1: I think we we do ourselves an injustice if we
Speaker 1: act like our finances are this separate part of who
Speaker 1: we are rather than a intertwined component of who we are.
Speaker 1: So I think this whole radical middle method is recognizing
Speaker 1: all of that. And certainly as we talk about this
Speaker 1: final piece of saving and investing and how to stick
Speaker 1: with it, it's certainly an ongoing recognition of what are
Speaker 1: the components of ourselves that we need to recognize, particularly
Speaker 1: how we make a plan and how we stick to it,
Speaker 1: and how we make decisions, and how we make decisions
Speaker 1: that are going to be beneficial to us. What what
Speaker 1: needs to stay and what needs to go, and how
Speaker 1: can we create longevity in it? Yeah, and all those
Speaker 1: questions are really the reason why we created the Frugal
Speaker 1: Friends Club, which is our membership where we have this
Speaker 1: video series and we do monthly challenges in there to
Speaker 1: create space to one create motivation that is fresh every month,
Speaker 1: but also space to ask those questions to get a
Speaker 1: third party to get outside uh, you know, advice or
Speaker 1: input or experience from people on the same path as
Speaker 1: you who are also working on improving their frugality and
Speaker 1: their money, so that you have a safe space to
Speaker 1: share and get input. So that's the whole reason behind
Speaker 1: why we came up with this method and and why
Speaker 1: we created the Frugal Friends Club. But so let's get
Speaker 1: into how to save smarter not harder with our first article,
Speaker 1: which is from the American Psychological Association UM and it's
Speaker 1: called Willpower, Finances and Spending. What do you think of
Speaker 1: this one, Jill Oh, I love it. Anytime we can
Speaker 1: blend mental health with financial understanding is a beautiful blend
Speaker 1: for me. Uh. And a p A brings back so
Speaker 1: many great memories for me from my college days. A
Speaker 1: p A has their own versions of way ways you
Speaker 1: need to write research papers and cite articles. So you
Speaker 1: know this is there's there's some good and bad throwback here,
Speaker 1: but they are a great organization, and yeah, finding all
Speaker 1: sorts of articles on a variety of topics from them
Speaker 1: is fantastic. I love how they talk about will power specifically,
Speaker 1: and I think it's similar to what we've discussed many
Speaker 1: times on this podcast, is decision fatigue. I think decision
Speaker 1: fatigue is connected to our will power, which is just
Speaker 1: our capacity to take in and respond to the various
Speaker 1: stimuli that are happening in our environment, whether emotional, mental, relational, spiritual, physical,
Speaker 1: you name it. The ability to maintain our values, the
Speaker 1: things that are important to us, what we say we
Speaker 1: want to do. We do have capacity when it comes
Speaker 1: to will power, and that's one the things that they
Speaker 1: highlight most. And if we can understand this concept, it
Speaker 1: can be really helpful for us in sticking to our
Speaker 1: financial plan, in saving smarter, not harder, in setting up
Speaker 1: some things that are going to be helpful for us
Speaker 1: long term. And they describe willpower kind of like a
Speaker 1: muscle that can certainly be exercised and stretched and built
Speaker 1: and grown, but it can also become exhausted as well.
Speaker 1: And sometimes as we overexert our willpower, we expect too
Speaker 1: much of our decision making abilities, back to back to
Speaker 1: back to back, we can get worn down. I think
Speaker 1: a lot of people can commiserate with this and can understand, of,
Speaker 1: all right, I reached my limit with whatever it is,
Speaker 1: because I think our will power isn't just connected to
Speaker 1: one aspect of who we are. We could exhaust will
Speaker 1: power and parenting, and then it translate over to not
Speaker 1: making the best financial decisions because we've already had to
Speaker 1: make a ton of their decisions and our willpower is
Speaker 1: worn down, So like willpower across the board, and then
Speaker 1: how does that impact various other aspects? So I think
Speaker 1: there's not like some magic thing that we can do
Speaker 1: with this, but recognizing that it's there and setting ourselves
Speaker 1: up for as much success in the areas that we
Speaker 1: want to see success in is going to be great.
Speaker 1: So that's that's a little bit of my summary and
Speaker 1: personal take on how they're describing willpower. But how did
Speaker 1: how did this strike you? Jen? Very much of the same.
Speaker 1: I loved this one study that they cited in here,
Speaker 1: and I'll just read it from the article. People who
Speaker 1: are constantly faced with tough financial decisions, such as those
Speaker 1: who are less financially stable, most readily deplete their willpower.
Speaker 1: So one study suggested that shoppers with less money, who
Speaker 1: often use more willpower than richer shoppers, because they face
Speaker 1: more frequent and difficult spending decisions, are less likely likely
Speaker 1: to resist consuming food and rink while shopping. Therefore, it
Speaker 1: appears that having to devote willpower to difficult spending decisions
Speaker 1: can deplete willpower in other areas. And so we see
Speaker 1: this a lot with people who are struggling financially living
Speaker 1: around the poverty line, and it's hard. Your every spending
Speaker 1: decision you make is a tough decision, whereas if you
Speaker 1: are more financially stable, the same decisions are are inconveniences
Speaker 1: at worst, So you do end up spending more the
Speaker 1: less you have. That's a phenomenon that you you often
Speaker 1: don't understand why you're doing it. It's like, if I
Speaker 1: have so little money, why do I always spend it? Well,
Speaker 1: this is very likely the case is that your willpower
Speaker 1: is being depleted earlier, uh and more rapidly than somebody
Speaker 1: who is more financially secure. And that's not to say
Speaker 1: that we need to remain stuck in that place. It's
Speaker 1: important to acknowledge that there just might be more difficulties
Speaker 1: and barriers for someone where there are more difficult decisions
Speaker 1: to be made, it is more depleting. But recognizing that
Speaker 1: then can help empower us to be able to respond
Speaker 1: rather than to become victim to that unknowingly. Yeah, like
Speaker 1: you're saying, generally, why is this happening to me? And
Speaker 1: so there are things that can be done, and I
Speaker 1: appreciate some of the lists that this article gave to
Speaker 1: us that there are ways that we can respond and
Speaker 1: recognize our capacity with with will power in the way
Speaker 1: that we can care for ourselves. Well here in one
Speaker 1: of those ways as it relates to finances, is the
Speaker 1: space out financial decisions wherever possible. And I know, Jen,
Speaker 1: you talk about this all the time, focusing on one thing.
Speaker 1: This aretical supports that idea make one decision at a time,
Speaker 1: but not only that, if you are able to space
Speaker 1: them out, not back to back to back to back.
Speaker 1: I'm making financial decision after tough financial decision after tough
Speaker 1: financial decision. I think there's gonna be some creativity and
Speaker 1: problem solving an individualization that needs to happen in light
Speaker 1: of this tip. It's not going to look the same
Speaker 1: for every person, But whatever you can do. Some of
Speaker 1: that might be automation, some of that might be planning ahead.
Speaker 1: I don't know what it will be for each one
Speaker 1: of us, but whatever we can implement so that our
Speaker 1: financial decisions can be spaced out and we can approach
Speaker 1: them one at a time to avoid some of that
Speaker 1: depletion of will power. Yeah, and this does take some
Speaker 1: putting on the calendar because everybody has these unpredictably busy seasons,
Speaker 1: but there are a lot of predictable um seasons where
Speaker 1: we make a lot of decisions. So around the holidays,
Speaker 1: like November December is not the time to be making
Speaker 1: big financial decisions, even though everybody wants to do that
Speaker 1: in December to prepare for January. And that's why most
Speaker 1: New Year's resolutions only last three weeks. Uh so the
Speaker 1: end of the school year, beginning of the school year
Speaker 1: if you have children. So just looking at your calendar
Speaker 1: and what areas you can predict will be busier, and
Speaker 1: then schedule time in the not as busy seasons to
Speaker 1: reevalue your reevaluate your finances, reevaluate your strategy, reevaluate that
Speaker 1: one page financial plan, because that's when you're gonna make
Speaker 1: the best decisions, because sometimes that comes with tough decisions,
Speaker 1: tough conversations. There's usually whenever you reevaluate, there's some kind
Speaker 1: of tough conversation that comes up, either with yourself or
Speaker 1: with your partner, or with your family. Ly, so this
Speaker 1: is the time to put that toughness on your plate,
Speaker 1: not when you have a bunch of other things going on.
Speaker 1: I so appreciate what you're highlighting here. Jen to not
Speaker 1: make our big important financial decisions during really stressful times
Speaker 1: of life. We're usually not going to make the best decision.
Speaker 1: It's usually going to be rushed or have crazy levels
Speaker 1: of anxiety or urgency to them that are not necessary.
Speaker 1: And so even paying attention to what time of day
Speaker 1: do you think best at for you? Is it the morning,
Speaker 1: is that the early evening, Is it late at night?
Speaker 1: For most people, it's going to be the morning. Usually
Speaker 1: you're going to make your best, least stressed decisions in
Speaker 1: the morning. For females, it's even worth considering time of
Speaker 1: the month. This has been an incredible tool that I've
Speaker 1: been able to extend to clients where we just don't
Speaker 1: think about it. Many of us have been adults for ages,
Speaker 1: but what is what what is the cycle like? And
Speaker 1: recognizing when you're at your best for making large decisions.
Speaker 1: So there's a lot of things that we want to
Speaker 1: take into consideration, but certainly not doing this when we're
Speaker 1: super stressed. Yeah, so that is for big decisions, but
Speaker 1: what about tiny decisions, the day today decisions? So their
Speaker 1: next recommendation is to track your spending and I would
Speaker 1: say do this even before you start a budget. Don't.
Speaker 1: Everybody says jump on the budget immediately. The budget is
Speaker 1: a lifesaver, and yeah, budgets make a big difference in
Speaker 1: how you reach your financial plan. But if that's a
Speaker 1: big barrier, if you've budgeted before and it's been hard
Speaker 1: and your prone district budgeting, stop, try something new. Track
Speaker 1: your spending for thirty days, literally every transaction every day
Speaker 1: in a notebook, in one of these tiny you know,
Speaker 1: two by four or four by six inch notebooks that
Speaker 1: you can carry with you wherever. Track your spending, every
Speaker 1: every penny, every day, and that will tell you a
Speaker 1: lot about your spending that your budget won't. Because your
Speaker 1: budget tells you what you could be doing. Tracking your
Speaker 1: spending tells you what you are doing, and it's not
Speaker 1: meant to guilt you. It's just meant to wake you up.
Speaker 1: And sometimes the wake up call can be more powerful
Speaker 1: than the guilt that a budget can give you. The
Speaker 1: next tip is to save automatically. You have heard us
Speaker 1: talk about this over and over again, and we're just
Speaker 1: not going to stop talking about it. When we can
Speaker 1: eliminate some of these even smaller decisions, all the better
Speaker 1: for our willpower. Put it on auto in the background.
Speaker 1: Let it be running like the fridge all the time,
Speaker 1: keeping our stuff called old. Set up a bank or
Speaker 1: an investment account that withdraws money automatically from your paycheck.
Speaker 1: There are plenty. Pretty much every investment account out there
Speaker 1: will allow you to invest automatically. Pretty much every bank
Speaker 1: account out there will allow you to save automatically. So
Speaker 1: doing this is gonna be super helpful to not have
Speaker 1: to add to that should I save this month, I
Speaker 1: got to remember to do this. I have to go
Speaker 1: into my computer and move money around. Just have it
Speaker 1: happen automatically, even if it's a small amount. Then we
Speaker 1: don't even have to think about it. And and we're
Speaker 1: already making a good decision for ourselves that we only
Speaker 1: had to make that decision one time. I think the
Speaker 1: biggest thing is for renters is the rent payment. Not
Speaker 1: every landlord does automatic rent payments, So if you are
Speaker 1: one of those, check into see if your landlord wants
Speaker 1: to switch to uh something called Stessa st e s
Speaker 1: s A. It's a software where your landlord can accept
Speaker 1: rent payments from you and you can set up automatic payments.
Speaker 1: So that's one less thing you have to think of
Speaker 1: every month. But it's a big thing. So that I
Speaker 1: think is the big Everything can be automated. Now there's everything,
Speaker 1: and that's really the biggest thing I think that I've
Speaker 1: seen people not automate. But that's one option. The next
Speaker 1: on this list is my absolute Favorite's my favorite one
Speaker 1: on the list. It's avoid temptation. It's just stay away.
Speaker 1: Put a physical barrier between you and the store, the
Speaker 1: route if you are passing by the store on a route,
Speaker 1: take a different route, take the apps off your phone.
Speaker 1: Like we go onto podcasts and they're like, what's your
Speaker 1: best tip for saving money and we're like, it's not sexy.
Speaker 1: It's avoidance. It's staying away from the places that you
Speaker 1: tend to spend impulsively or out of character or whatever. Yeah,
Speaker 1: just don't go, but but replace it with something because
Speaker 1: any time we take something away and we don't replace
Speaker 1: it with something new, we are going to feel super deprived.
Speaker 1: And that's not the goal of this. We want to
Speaker 1: live full, enjoyable lives as much as possible. But if
Speaker 1: this isn't serving you, if you're spending money it's not
Speaker 1: actually beneficial for you or your wallet, then a change
Speaker 1: needs to be made. But that doesn't mean just a removal,
Speaker 1: only a subtraction. Sometimes it can mean the addition of
Speaker 1: other things. Hanging out with people, doing free things, exploring
Speaker 1: in ways that aren't going to cost money. There's there's
Speaker 1: always something else that can be done that is going
Speaker 1: to be more beneficial for you. So finding those things,
Speaker 1: picking up and even a new activity that is low
Speaker 1: cost or no cost can be a really fun part
Speaker 1: of this process. And then last that they list on
Speaker 1: here is ask for support and we also love this
Speaker 1: one as well. If you haven't heard us already or
Speaker 1: picked up on this reality, we love community and we
Speaker 1: think that community is one of the most important components
Speaker 1: to longevity on this journey of whatever your goals are
Speaker 1: financially and just in life, like we need other people.
Speaker 1: We need reciprocity in relationships to know and be known,
Speaker 1: and where you can find people who are going to
Speaker 1: value you, value your goals, be supportive of them, and
Speaker 1: we know not everybody is. Sometimes you need to keep
Speaker 1: them in your life. Sometimes you can create some separation there,
Speaker 1: but definitely adding in some of those people who are
Speaker 1: gonna be supportive to you, who are going to be
Speaker 1: the ones that you can call up and are so
Speaker 1: down to do something free instead of spending money or
Speaker 1: something that's expensive. The people who are going to ask you, hey,
Speaker 1: how's this going or how can I help? And that
Speaker 1: can be found in person, hopefully and online. I know
Speaker 1: it's something that we've created with with frugal friends and
Speaker 1: with our membership, so that that's fantastic and we have
Speaker 1: seen people grow leaps and bounds, myself included. I have
Speaker 1: made so many massive strides and my finances that I
Speaker 1: know for sure I would not have done without others
Speaker 1: around me even pointing me towards things that I don't know.
Speaker 1: I just don't know what I don't know, and that
Speaker 1: comes from community and support, and of course the article
Speaker 1: gives their plug for psychologists. You know, it's it's a
Speaker 1: p A. It's the American Psychology Association, So they're going
Speaker 1: to talk about their people and how you should see
Speaker 1: a psychologist, which that's fine. I definitely support mental health
Speaker 1: and pursuing growth in our mental health. If you think
Speaker 1: that a counselor therapist would be helpful for you, absolutely,
Speaker 1: particularly when it comes to decision making and some of
Speaker 1: our behaviors, there's there's always root causes to it, and
Speaker 1: a psychologist, a counselor therapist can help you dig into that.
Speaker 1: So if you've tried all of these different things and
Speaker 1: you're listening to the podcast and you're reading the books,
Speaker 1: and you keep coming up against barriers, there could be
Speaker 1: some mindset shifts that a counselor would be able to
Speaker 1: help you with. Whether it's a task centered approach or
Speaker 1: cognitive behavioral therapy or just general talk therapy, it can
Speaker 1: be helpful. Um, not everybody needs it all the time,
Speaker 1: and the hope with counseling is that we utilize that
Speaker 1: as a resource as we need. But it is not
Speaker 1: meant to be a lifetime experience where you are dependent
Speaker 1: on a relationship with a counselor. So that's my little
Speaker 1: plug or yes, use it if you need it, but
Speaker 1: it don't Yeah, don't don't feel like this has to
Speaker 1: be a part of your life long term either. Yeah,
Speaker 1: thank you for that. Chill. This is I mean, the
Speaker 1: willpower and the decision fatigue aspects of daily life are
Speaker 1: really why we we invest so much time on the
Speaker 1: show to everything we talked about kind of has this
Speaker 1: um this theme in the background for us because it's
Speaker 1: something that is not talked about as widely. The tips
Speaker 1: are a lot of make extra money, invest, eat beans
Speaker 1: and rice, but like not a lot on the will power.
Speaker 1: And maybe the root causes for why we feel um
Speaker 1: the way we do about our finances, which also inhibits
Speaker 1: some of our will power and contributes to decision fatigue.
Speaker 1: And I think the two things that we focus most
Speaker 1: on to preserve will power are building habits and then
Speaker 1: also simplifying because the more physical and mental clutter you have,
Speaker 1: the worst your spending decisions are. So we in in
Speaker 1: the Frugal Friends Club focus a lot on building healthy habits,
Speaker 1: breaking limiting habits, and then also um internal and external
Speaker 1: motivators and then all the things around how can we
Speaker 1: make better decisions? But that's only half of the save smarter,
Speaker 1: not harder way of life. I guess this could be
Speaker 1: the not harder half, but it's essentially using the eight
Speaker 1: twenty principle to save more with less effort. And so
Speaker 1: our next article is from Money The Simple Way, Big Wins,
Speaker 1: The Simple Way, the approach to saving money. Jill, how
Speaker 1: familiar with with the principle? Are you very familiar? I
Speaker 1: think a lot of various sects talk about the Peretto
Speaker 1: principle is something that can be applied to the corporate
Speaker 1: world to our personal finances. It's it's not specific to
Speaker 1: any one category. It's just this idea that of our
Speaker 1: efforts often produce eighty percent of the outcome that the production,
Speaker 1: the product, whatever that product maybe, and so applying it
Speaker 1: to personal finances just a new way of looking at
Speaker 1: it and then again using it as a tool. I
Speaker 1: think so much of what we're about to go over
Speaker 1: in this article none of it's shocking, but it is
Speaker 1: or even brand new, but it is a new way
Speaker 1: to look at it, or a different way to look
Speaker 1: at it. I think that's what we're doing with this
Speaker 1: podcast in a lot of ways, is what are the
Speaker 1: different facets, what's gonna work for the variety of people
Speaker 1: who tune in for ourselves and as our situations grow
Speaker 1: and change, like we are not static individuals, you and
Speaker 1: I or our listeners, like, we're dynamic. We're changing, we're shifting.
Speaker 1: So sometimes a mindset that used to work for us
Speaker 1: isn't working anymore. We need to implement something new. So
Speaker 1: we're just looking at all the different facets of this
Speaker 1: really cool diamond and trying to figure out, hey, does
Speaker 1: this work? Does this work? At the core of it,
Speaker 1: it's all going to be the same being wise stewards
Speaker 1: of our resources. But what's the best way for our
Speaker 1: minds to engage in that? And and some tangible tips
Speaker 1: along the way. But that's how this struck me, of Oh,
Speaker 1: we can use the Parretto principle for thinking about saving better,
Speaker 1: spending less. Yeah, I mean, of our episodes will provide
Speaker 1: you eighty percent of your results, but we're not gonna
Speaker 1: tell you which of them they are. You're just gonna
Speaker 1: have to listen to. But it is, I mean, it's
Speaker 1: crazy how accurate the rule of thumb is across all
Speaker 1: industries and everywhere, and even like getting down to the
Speaker 1: nitty gritty, like eighty so The way that um Peretto
Speaker 1: came up with the rule is that of landowners owned
Speaker 1: eighty percent of the land. And then he broke it
Speaker 1: down again of those twenty percent, there was twenty percent
Speaker 1: of those who owned eighty percent of that land, and
Speaker 1: then broke it down again and saw that of those
Speaker 1: owned eighty percent of that land. So it is something
Speaker 1: that is normal, and it's good, it's okay. And the
Speaker 1: further we get away from twenty and closer maybe to
Speaker 1: nine ten is when we should get worried. But we're
Speaker 1: not here to talk about that right now. Let's talk
Speaker 1: about the twenty of our spending. So UM, the author
Speaker 1: finds that there is the vital few of frugality. So
Speaker 1: he went to a nineteen consumer expenditure survey to get
Speaker 1: where most Americans have their household spending and found that
Speaker 1: thirty two point eight percent of it's on housing, seventeen
Speaker 1: percent is on transportation, cent is on food, even is
Speaker 1: on personal insurance and pensions. And then we get lower
Speaker 1: as we go down. Um, And he said that you'll
Speaker 1: notice that the spending doesn't fit exactly into the rule.
Speaker 1: Out of seventeen categories, the top three to four should
Speaker 1: represent about and they represents the top three categories only
Speaker 1: represents sixty of the total and the top four about seventy.
Speaker 1: So he says it's not iron clad, Um, it's just general.
Speaker 1: So but that just goes like to show focusing on that.
Speaker 1: You can focus on these top four and get big
Speaker 1: results and you don't even have to pay attention to
Speaker 1: the other ones until you get the top four under control.
Speaker 1: You can totally forget about your lattes while you're working
Speaker 1: on or in your house, and you totally forget about, uh,
Speaker 1: your your clothes budget while you're working on your food
Speaker 1: budget or your transportation. There's that's how we choose the
Speaker 1: one thing to focus on. We start with the biggest
Speaker 1: and then we just go down. We don't have to
Speaker 1: work on everything at the same time, permission. I love
Speaker 1: this quote that they that he mentions in here. If
Speaker 1: you want big winds, focus on the vital few instead
Speaker 1: of the trivial many. And that's what you're talking about there.
Speaker 1: We love to get caught up in the coffee budget,
Speaker 1: but really, what if we got caught up in the housing, transportation,
Speaker 1: food part of the budget. That's where we're going to
Speaker 1: see the big wins. Is when we focus on the
Speaker 1: vital few. And I also appreciate how the author recognized
Speaker 1: that everyone's top three or four expenditures is not going
Speaker 1: to be the same. For him, it wasn't. As a
Speaker 1: family of five, he said his food budget was actually
Speaker 1: higher monthly than his mortgage was, which is insane. But
Speaker 1: it also sounds like they got a great deal on
Speaker 1: their housing costs. So it is worth doing a what
Speaker 1: they call Peretto analysis of your own budget, listing out
Speaker 1: your annual spending. You're going to have the best results
Speaker 1: if you're able to look at a full calendar year
Speaker 1: of spending and list that all out into categories. Certainly,
Speaker 1: if you already use a certain type of app that
Speaker 1: could help you with this, then the job is a
Speaker 1: little bit easier for you. And if you're a person
Speaker 1: like Jen who just likes to write things out like
Speaker 1: in her planner, then then maybe this will be a
Speaker 1: fun exercise. But really dig into what are the top
Speaker 1: three or four expenditures for you so that you know
Speaker 1: where you're going to see the biggest impact on the
Speaker 1: vital few instead of the trivial many. But for most
Speaker 1: of us, it is going to be housing, transportation, and food,
Speaker 1: and so the article goes into some more just few
Speaker 1: tips on how could we experience some decreased costs some
Speaker 1: savings in each of these big massive categories. Yes, so
Speaker 1: we will not dive into these in this episode. These
Speaker 1: are actually um all challenges that we have done or
Speaker 1: are going to do in the Frugal Friends Club. The
Speaker 1: most recent one was the house savings Hunters challenge, where
Speaker 1: we looked for ways to like decrease our housing. You know,
Speaker 1: everything in that category that was fun, That was fun. Yeah.
Speaker 1: Uh so when they talk about like mortgage or rent,
Speaker 1: definitely shopping around is the first, you know thing that
Speaker 1: they say, we got our And it's not always like
Speaker 1: this anymore. I would say that if you haven't you
Speaker 1: just listened to our housing market episode, you'll get it.
Speaker 1: It's harder to shop around, but that means it's more important. Honestly,
Speaker 1: it just makes it even more important. I love the
Speaker 1: example that they gave in the article. If you are
Speaker 1: going to shop around for your computer and take time
Speaker 1: to shop around for a new computer, how much more
Speaker 1: so should you be shopping around and taking your time
Speaker 1: with a purchase like a house or finding an apartment?
Speaker 1: I know, not all of us have the luxury of
Speaker 1: time on our side, but wherever possible, it will pay
Speaker 1: off in the long run to feel really good about
Speaker 1: the decision that we're making and for it to be
Speaker 1: within our means. Yeah, when we interviewed Mindy Jensen and
Speaker 1: Scott from Bigger Pockets, they said, don't rush home purchase.
Speaker 1: And the author here says the process for him to
Speaker 1: buy his house took nine months to find the right deal.
Speaker 1: And it, I mean, I am pretty sure it's for
Speaker 1: most people going to take around the same time right now,
Speaker 1: So stick to your guns, waited out, be patient. And
Speaker 1: as far as transportation goes, you know, considering can you
Speaker 1: come go down to one vehicle? Has your employment situation shifted?
Speaker 1: Are you working from home more? Are you able to
Speaker 1: work from home more? Are you able to even look
Speaker 1: for a job that provides you remote opportunities so that
Speaker 1: you could go down to one one vehicle and be
Speaker 1: driving less? Are there public transportation alternatives? Are They're just
Speaker 1: ways to think outside the box related to your transportation costs.
Speaker 1: And then of course with food, this is a big one,
Speaker 1: and I would say go back into our archive and
Speaker 1: look at all of the different on food but you
Speaker 1: know what it's gonna be is eating out less. And
Speaker 1: of course there's so many different tips around how we
Speaker 1: can do that. One of the things I will highlight
Speaker 1: because this felt a little bit new to me in
Speaker 1: reading this our are called was encouraging us to master
Speaker 1: five to ten recipes that we really enjoy and putting
Speaker 1: those on rotation and or keeping them in the freezer
Speaker 1: for some crazy busy weeks or nights. And I know
Speaker 1: we've talked about freezer meals before, and we've talked about
Speaker 1: meal planning, but I don't think we've ever talked about
Speaker 1: it in the sense of what's the food you really enjoy,
Speaker 1: so you're actually gonna look forward to doing that and
Speaker 1: you know how to cook it, so not not getting
Speaker 1: so overwhelmed like I have to come up with a
Speaker 1: new recipe every week to keep variety. Just find five
Speaker 1: to ten recipes you really enjoy, master how to cook
Speaker 1: that hone in on your cooking skills, and put them
Speaker 1: on rotation. With some other simple meals, maybe the five
Speaker 1: to ten are a little bit more complicated, but you
Speaker 1: know you're always going to have those ingredients on hand,
Speaker 1: and you know you're going to enjoy it. I really
Speaker 1: like that tip. I think there was a new way
Speaker 1: to kind of look at food. Yeah, that's a great
Speaker 1: tip is just give yourself a goal for the year
Speaker 1: to master ten recipes or start with five five recipes
Speaker 1: over the next year that you're going to just make
Speaker 1: on repeat, you know, once a week, and then you're making,
Speaker 1: you know, one recipe every five weeks. So it's not
Speaker 1: getting too much that you get tired of it, but
Speaker 1: enough that you're making it so that you remember it
Speaker 1: and can learn it and can make it their staples
Speaker 1: and you can make it. Like the author says, his
Speaker 1: wife has a dish that she's made so much. She
Speaker 1: said she can make it in her sleep. That's amazing
Speaker 1: for me. It's chicken pocata. I love chicken poccata. Cannot
Speaker 1: get over capers. Papers are so good. Yeah, I definitely
Speaker 1: it's a it's a beans and rice with a packet
Speaker 1: of the what's that it's the it's the Yeah, maybe
Speaker 1: it comes in a packet. It's orange and I throw
Speaker 1: some like frozen veggies in there, and I will recreate
Speaker 1: poyo tropical essentially, and I'll create my own curry mustard.
Speaker 1: That's a whole other thing too. If you're craving take out.
Speaker 1: The internet has a palthora of recipes that can replicate
Speaker 1: whatever it is that you are craving, so that might
Speaker 1: even be something to consider. Mastering those recipes what you
Speaker 1: normally gravitate towards when you go out to a restaurant,
Speaker 1: master that thing. For Eric, it's French fries. He loves
Speaker 1: French fries. And I have actually made some French Actually
Speaker 1: you were here, Jen, I made French fries in my
Speaker 1: air fryer that he loved that night when we had
Speaker 1: steak together. Yeah gosh, we didn't get love, yeah, because
Speaker 1: we had to go record, But you were good fries.
Speaker 1: You know what else is good? And speaking of work,
Speaker 1: it's the bill of the week. That's right, it's time
Speaker 1: for the best minute of your entire week. Maybe a
Speaker 1: baby was born and his name is Williams. Maybe you
Speaker 1: paid off your mortgage, maybe your car died, and you're
Speaker 1: happy to not have to pay that bill anymore. To bills,
Speaker 1: Buffalo bills, Bill Clinton, this is the bill of the week.
Speaker 1: High Frugal Friends. My name is Jen and I discovered
Speaker 1: you all last year and I love your podcast and
Speaker 1: appreciate all of the fun and levity that you bring
Speaker 1: to finance. I was really lacking that before I found you, guys.
Speaker 1: My bill of the week comes from Christmas Eve. After
Speaker 1: listening to your podcast with Mrs Frugal Woods, I joined
Speaker 1: a couple of my local buy nothing groups on Facebook.
Speaker 1: We don't have a TV, and I thought that it
Speaker 1: would be so fun to get one for our kids
Speaker 1: for Christmas, but I didn't want to spend extra money,
Speaker 1: so I put it out there on the buy nothing
Speaker 1: groups and on Christmas Eve, I got a message from
Speaker 1: someone that they in fact had a perfectly working free
Speaker 1: TV for me to pick up. So we went and
Speaker 1: got it, wrapped it up and put a note on
Speaker 1: it that it was from Santa, and our kids opened
Speaker 1: it on Christmas morning and they loved it. So that
Speaker 1: is my bill of the week. Thank you so much
Speaker 1: for all that you do. Oh my gosh, Jen. First
Speaker 1: of all, great name. Second of all, no TV. You
Speaker 1: are a hero. You're a hero so many that that's amazing.
Speaker 1: I love that lifestyle at But also I'm so thrilled
Speaker 1: to hear that you found a local by nothing group
Speaker 1: and that they were able to provide you with something special,
Speaker 1: something that you wanted, but it wasn't valuable enough to
Speaker 1: you to have to spend money on it. And it
Speaker 1: sounds like your bill of the week is not spending
Speaker 1: any bills on a gift for your kids. And what
Speaker 1: a good idea of a way to utilize your buy
Speaker 1: nothing group around Christmas time. I don't know if you
Speaker 1: sent this in around Christmas time, So sorry, we are
Speaker 1: so backed up, but we're still celebrating with you. Yeah,
Speaker 1: going to two episodes a week is half for you
Speaker 1: and half for us to get through this backlog of bills,
Speaker 1: Like we need to double the episodes because we're so behind.
Speaker 1: And that is why I keep sending in your bills,
Speaker 1: because that's why maybe we'll depending on how many you
Speaker 1: send it, maybe we'll go to more. Who knows. That's
Speaker 1: amazing And for anyone listening, if you want to join
Speaker 1: a buy nothing group, look it up. There's so many again,
Speaker 1: reciprocity and community. It's a give and take. You offer
Speaker 1: things up for free, you were able to receive things
Speaker 1: for free. It's fantastic. And also, if you want to
Speaker 1: submit your bill of the week, whether it has to
Speaker 1: do with not spending bills or spending bills, or a
Speaker 1: person named Bill, or multiple bills. If you know many
Speaker 1: many bills, that'd be so amazing. You're in a bill
Speaker 1: society for Bill Murray's Yes, visit Frugal Friends podcast dot
Speaker 1: com slash Bill, leave us here Bill, and now it's
Speaker 1: time for so Today's Lightning Round, which is the eight
Speaker 1: percent of our show percent of work, but it's value. Yes. No,
Speaker 1: the Bill of the Week is that people turned to
Speaker 1: did for I have learned. We got a message the
Speaker 1: other day. I don't know if it was like on
Speaker 1: Instagram or in an email, but someone had listened to
Speaker 1: some of the first few episodes and they were like, hey,
Speaker 1: new listener, listening to some of the first episodes, just
Speaker 1: want to know if you're still doing the Bill of
Speaker 1: the week. And I was like, every single episode, but
Speaker 1: I couldn't tell. There was no response to that. It
Speaker 1: was definitely on Instagram. There was no response, and I
Speaker 1: couldn't tell. Is she asking because she doesn't want to
Speaker 1: hear this anymore and she's like if they say yes,
Speaker 1: I'm done, or if she wanted to send in a bill,
Speaker 1: And so I never got the answer. We may never know,
Speaker 1: We may never know, but I'm gonna assume it's because
Speaker 1: she loved it, right, that's safe to assume. Yeah, that's
Speaker 1: so all right, John, you go first on this round
Speaker 1: of vulnerability. What is your best eight twenty savings tip?
Speaker 1: Absolutely so, we have always been so I'm going to
Speaker 1: choose housing. And I have always been a big proponent
Speaker 1: for house hacking, which is it's essentially buying. So traditionally
Speaker 1: when it first started, it was instead of um buying
Speaker 1: like your dream home for your first home, your first
Speaker 1: home is a duplex or a triplex and you live
Speaker 1: in one part and you rent out the other um side,
Speaker 1: and it essentially covers most of your mortgage so that
Speaker 1: you can just save up your money and then go
Speaker 1: buy your dream home or another rental property to do
Speaker 1: the house hack again, whatever you want. So we didn't
Speaker 1: know about house hacking when we bought our first house,
Speaker 1: and by the time we did, it was impossible to
Speaker 1: get duplexes in St. Pete. There was is impossible. So
Speaker 1: what we did was, when we found out about it,
Speaker 1: we rented at our guest room on Airbnb and it
Speaker 1: worked fabulously. Uh So people have definitely heard we talked
Speaker 1: about this. We did it for several years. We were
Speaker 1: booked out all the time, and it was just our
Speaker 1: guest room and our guest bathroom, and we shared the
Speaker 1: other spaces in the house except um, we didn't share
Speaker 1: my office or our bedroom. Uh and and nobody really
Speaker 1: took us up on the sharing the rest of the house.
Speaker 1: Pretty much. People who rent a shared room on Airbnb
Speaker 1: are just there for a place to sleep. They're not
Speaker 1: there for a place to hang, which was convenient for us.
Speaker 1: But we got to meet so many cool people. It
Speaker 1: was the best house hack I think we could have
Speaker 1: ever done. And it pretty much almost covered our mortgage
Speaker 1: um every month that we did it. And now we're
Speaker 1: kind of house hacking. We bought at a large house
Speaker 1: and we're going to make part of it a mid
Speaker 1: term rental like for snowbirds, and uh, we are renting
Speaker 1: out the original house that we lived in and so
Speaker 1: that once we get the renovation on this mid term
Speaker 1: rental done, then between that and the other house, the
Speaker 1: income should cover both mortgages. And so that is my best,
Speaker 1: my favorite. Yeah, it's excellent. It is requiring a lot
Speaker 1: of work up front. Depending on your situation, that could
Speaker 1: be the case, but once you put in that initial
Speaker 1: effort it can get to a point of twenty percent
Speaker 1: effort for eighty percent return. Yeah, I mean the guest
Speaker 1: room was very effortless, and we lived in a in
Speaker 1: a area that it was good for like fifteen minutes
Speaker 1: from the beach, fifteen minutes from a bunch of different universities.
Speaker 1: Uh so we lived in a good area for it.
Speaker 1: But um, it was very effortless for that. This one
Speaker 1: a lot of efforts. Don't recommend it upfront, but the
Speaker 1: guest room thing was so easy. Yeah for me. When
Speaker 1: it as it relates to I think, this is what
Speaker 1: I do with each category, So the biggest expenses. So
Speaker 1: if we were to look at housing, transportation, and food,
Speaker 1: I would agree that for me, I'm I'm I'm a
Speaker 1: basic person where those are probably the biggest expenditures for me,
Speaker 1: and applying the rule to each of those categories like
Speaker 1: breaking it down smaller and smaller. So what is the
Speaker 1: top amount of money that I'm spending within food, within transportation,
Speaker 1: and how can I decrease that like the big winds
Speaker 1: the vital few, rather than the small amounts. So I'm
Speaker 1: not cutting out gum. But recently, well, Jen, this is
Speaker 1: actually gonna be news to you too, and it may
Speaker 1: break your heart a little bit, but it's a good thing.
Speaker 1: We have what We've definitely significantly cut out eating out,
Speaker 1: and I have found ways to really enjoy eating at home.
Speaker 1: Sometimes it means doing a random meal kit delivery just
Speaker 1: to keep me going in my eating at home efforts,
Speaker 1: but I've really enjoyed that, which I never would have thought.
Speaker 1: It's been a trained muscle. But we also have made
Speaker 1: a drastic cut in our alcohol consumption. Like we got
Speaker 1: to a point where we thought, every time we go out,
Speaker 1: like it's fun to be able to get a drink
Speaker 1: with our meal, and we are realizing that by not
Speaker 1: doing that, it significantly decreases the amount of money we
Speaker 1: spend even when we go out. And what's amazing about
Speaker 1: it is we're not missing it, Like we can replace
Speaker 1: it with other enjoyable things. I can have, like a
Speaker 1: little piece of chocolate waiting for me when I get home,
Speaker 1: and that's like just the treat that I need, because
Speaker 1: it's not even about like getting a drink, It's about
Speaker 1: having something that feels like a treat. But when I'm
Speaker 1: getting a treat every single time, then it takes away
Speaker 1: the enjoyment of it. I never growing up, I never
Speaker 1: got soda or a lemonade or and I see I
Speaker 1: always did water. Something like what happened to us that
Speaker 1: suddenly we're getting a drink out every time we go out.
Speaker 1: So really, scaling back in that regard has helped us
Speaker 1: phenomenally with with the food. With transportation, we cut back
Speaker 1: to one vehicle. We've been a one vehicle family now
Speaker 1: for two years, which is amazing, and that works for
Speaker 1: us because we work from home. Sometimes it stinks when
Speaker 1: our car needs to go in for repairs, but that's
Speaker 1: very minimal and we work around it. In the long run,
Speaker 1: it's saving us a lot of money. And as far
Speaker 1: as housing, you've heard all of the housing things that
Speaker 1: we've done, But one thing I don't think I've ever
Speaker 1: mentioned on this podcast before is when we were renting
Speaker 1: before we did the tiny home, before we had a
Speaker 1: home that we could make an airbnb in. When we
Speaker 1: looked for apartments, we did not have a ton of money,
Speaker 1: and so one of the ways that we got what
Speaker 1: we wanted at an inexpensive price was looking at very
Speaker 1: inexpensive rentals. I know that's really it's harder to come by,
Speaker 1: but considering looking at places that you wouldn't normally consider,
Speaker 1: Like if you're the type of person who would primarily
Speaker 1: go like apartment complex, consider looking for some smaller apartment
Speaker 1: situations that might not be as nice and working out
Speaker 1: a deal of being able to fix it up, do
Speaker 1: a few minor repairs or painting with the landlord to
Speaker 1: be able to make it what you like. So that
Speaker 1: was one of the things that we did on multiple occasions,
Speaker 1: was renovating an apartment to be more what we wanted,
Speaker 1: but maintaining the lower rent. Of course, I recognize that
Speaker 1: may or may not be available to people or as
Speaker 1: readily available now, but I don't think I've ever discussed
Speaker 1: that on this podcast when we were in a rental
Speaker 1: and not an owning situation. So anything really that's going
Speaker 1: to be thinking outside the box and looking at these
Speaker 1: heavy hit or categories is going to make the biggest
Speaker 1: dent in our finances. Yeah, I think that's a great
Speaker 1: if you are handy, even like partially because a landlord
Speaker 1: isn't going to want you to do major renovations, but
Speaker 1: if you can paint, if you can replace a few fixtures,
Speaker 1: very simple things, then you look at the cost of
Speaker 1: handymen look at like, do an analysis of what it
Speaker 1: would cost them to fix up their property and what
Speaker 1: they can charge extra for rent if they do fix
Speaker 1: up their property and create a deal or propose a
Speaker 1: deal where it's like, over the next year, i will
Speaker 1: fix this up to this, you'll give me this discount
Speaker 1: on rent. So they save or you know, maybe they
Speaker 1: don't save as much then as hand doing handyman, but
Speaker 1: they know the work is going to get done and
Speaker 1: they don't have to disrupt any tenants or give any
Speaker 1: you know, additional discounts or have the thing they get
Speaker 1: for a month while they do the renovations. They know
Speaker 1: you will do it, and then you're like, you will
Speaker 1: give me this price for one year or two years,
Speaker 1: and then I'll move out and you can jack up.
Speaker 1: Some of the benefit is what they'll be able to
Speaker 1: make off of it once you leave. Our landlord was
Speaker 1: able to charge four hundred dollars a month extra after
Speaker 1: we left because of the work that we did on
Speaker 1: the place. So yeah, it's there. It can be a
Speaker 1: win win, Yeah, make it if you tell them that
Speaker 1: they are going to make money off of giving you
Speaker 1: a discount, because you can tell them the things that
Speaker 1: you can do, etcetera. And yeah, it's a great strategy. Uh.
Speaker 1: So I hope that you've gleaned some wisdom from this
Speaker 1: um and yeah, from this whole Radical Middle Method series. Honestly,
Speaker 1: so thank you so much for listening. And uh, in
Speaker 1: our private community, you know that we are sharing the
Speaker 1: winds of our members and and they've all lived out
Speaker 1: the Radical Middle Method. Watched the video series. They're doing
Speaker 1: the challenges and they're getting results. Not even that I mean, yes,
Speaker 1: the most active members, but even like newer members and
Speaker 1: even members that are just there when they can be
Speaker 1: and gone when they're not. So we wanted to shout
Speaker 1: out one of our members, Wendy. Uh. She said, I
Speaker 1: paid off my Target card the other day and it
Speaker 1: feels so good. Um. And then she had another win
Speaker 1: that I wanted to like couple up in here that
Speaker 1: she posted like a several days later, she said, thanks
Speaker 1: to last night's group and the challenge checklist, we do
Speaker 1: not have to buy a new dishwasher yet. My husband
Speaker 1: and I didn't know there was a filter to clean
Speaker 1: L O L. That was during our house unders challenge
Speaker 1: that I mentioned earlier. She says, now to fix the dryer. Ah,
Speaker 1: it so amazing. Congratulations Wenday. That's a trimetime example of
Speaker 1: we don't know what we don't know, and when we
Speaker 1: find support and we find community and we're able to
Speaker 1: learn from one another, we can save a ton of
Speaker 1: money and we can learn ways to earn more as well.
Speaker 1: So when we can combine that saving and increasing our earnings,
Speaker 1: skies the limit and we're here for you. So congrats Wenday. Yeah,
Speaker 1: so thanks for listening. If you want to check out
Speaker 1: our monthly challenge community had to Frugal Friends podcast dot
Speaker 1: com slash club to see what challenge we're doing next.
Speaker 1: You'll get access to the full Radical Middle Method video
Speaker 1: series and a group of really cool people. M see
Speaker 1: you next week. Frugal Friends is produced by Eric Syrian Jillian.
Speaker 1: Why did you think that I would be upset with you?
Speaker 1: Not as much alcoholic restaurants? I don't even go out, Jill.
Speaker 1: I don't, well, I don't go out to restaurants because
Speaker 1: also the reality is that I'm also drinking less at home.
Speaker 1: It's just like across the board we decided we're doing
Speaker 1: we're doing a hard left turn. I mean, we weren't
Speaker 1: like we weren't drinking an insane amount where it was
Speaker 1: like affecting our lives are like our lives. But we
Speaker 1: also did get ourselves into a rhythm where it kind
Speaker 1: of just became part of a routine where many nights
Speaker 1: we were, you know, having a cocktail before dinner or
Speaker 1: a glass of wine with dinner, not not normally both,
Speaker 1: but like I would say, four or five days a week,
Speaker 1: we're having a drink, and and we realized why are
Speaker 1: we doing this because we would only have a drink,
Speaker 1: so it did nothing for us other than to put
Speaker 1: like some toxic substance in our body and make us
Speaker 1: feel more lethargic the next day. I think it just
Speaker 1: felt like coming going in. I think a lot of
Speaker 1: it became a part of the pandemic lifestyle of we're home,
Speaker 1: there's not much to do, we can't really go out.
Speaker 1: We we don't work from home, we live at work,
Speaker 1: and how do we create breaks in our day? And
Speaker 1: that was one of the ways that we created a
Speaker 1: break in our day or felt like we were able
Speaker 1: to enjoy something together. I think we always associated like
Speaker 1: a nice cocktail with a nice experience, and that's not
Speaker 1: the only way to have a nice experience, but for whatever,
Speaker 1: for whatever happened, we just kind of like got in
Speaker 1: this rhythm and it just became a part of routine.
Speaker 1: And I think we finally are at this point of
Speaker 1: but life. It's not the same anymore, and we're enjoying
Speaker 1: things and this isn't doing anything for us. And already
Speaker 1: I think we're like two weeks into this decision and
Speaker 1: we are feeling so good, like what we feel like
Speaker 1: so much better and we're not missing it and we're
Speaker 1: finding things to replace it with. And turns out all
Speaker 1: of our friends are on board. And also had to
Speaker 1: do with having people in town, hosting people so much.
Speaker 1: Everyone's on vacation, so every time they come in, it's
Speaker 1: like they they're they're on vacation. So yeah, I would
Speaker 1: love to have a cocktail at night, and we're with
Speaker 1: them and we want to partake with them. But being
Speaker 1: able to tell people, oh yeah, like we're cutting back
Speaker 1: a bit, they're like, oh great, awesome, we don't need
Speaker 1: that either, or they can partake and we don't need to.
Speaker 1: Like it doesn't it's not mutually exclusive. We don't all
Speaker 1: have to do the same things altogether. Just taking time
Speaker 1: to just ask shins and question what you're doing and
Speaker 1: saying like, hey, this was great then in a season,
Speaker 1: but is it great now? And it can still be
Speaker 1: good without being great. And it doesn't have to mean
Speaker 1: deprivation either. I think sometimes like that pendulum, it swings
Speaker 1: in so many directions. It doesn't mean that now it's
Speaker 1: all bad and I have to cut it all out,
Speaker 1: just greater degrees of finding the radical middle. And I
Speaker 1: actually think that it has created more freedom and permission
Speaker 1: that I don't feel locked into this routine of oh well,
Speaker 1: I'm just like used to pouring a glass of wine
Speaker 1: with dinner. Now it can be no pay attention to
Speaker 1: actually want that. And if it sounds good to me, great,
Speaker 1: If it doesn't, I don't have to. Like, just because
Speaker 1: it's available in my house doesn't mean I have to
Speaker 1: drink it all up. Yeah, I'm proud of you. You
Speaker 1: are my go to home bar. But I accept you,
Speaker 1: and I see you, and I see you are welcome,
Speaker 1: Like that's the thing to like have at the case
Speaker 1: of wine. My mother in law them, I don't and
Speaker 1: I don't. We don't have to. Yeah, whatever someone else
Speaker 1: wants to do and sounds good to them, doesn't mean
Speaker 1: that I have to do it too, and it also
Speaker 1: means that whenever it does sound good to me, I
Speaker 1: can also enjoy that great yeah freedom permission in every
Speaker 1: category of life. Who