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Speaker 1: It's broken Jeffrey in the morning, and we got an

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Speaker 1: email from a guy who's been married for about twelve

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Speaker 1: years to his loving wife. They laughed together at the

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Speaker 1: greatest time, and he's like, man.

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Speaker 2: You gotta do it.

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Speaker 1: You gotta prank her because her biggest weak spot is

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Speaker 1: being overcharged for dumb things. She can't handle it, and

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Speaker 1: she'll probably lose it on you if you keep needling her. Well, sir,

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Speaker 1: we can do that. In fact, it's kind of our specialty.

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Speaker 1: In your phone tap right now.

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Speaker 2: Brooking Jeffrey's phone taps on the twenties. Hello, good morning.

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Speaker 1: I'm calling from Groceries and Pharmacy. Am I speaking with

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Speaker 1: CLAIREML you are Hi, Hi Claire. My name is Frankfurter.

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Speaker 1: I'm one of the supervisors.

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Speaker 3: How can I help you.

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Speaker 1: I'm just reaching out because I got your information from

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Speaker 1: your rewards card, and first of all, I want to

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Speaker 1: thank you for being a loyal Rewards member over the

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Speaker 1: past seventeen years.

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Speaker 3: Oh sang, no problem. I mean it's where I get

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Speaker 3: my groceries, so.

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Speaker 2: Oh yeah, amen to that. Damn right.

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Speaker 1: So anyway, the real reason for my call today is

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Speaker 1: one of my cashiers mistakenly didn't ring you.

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Speaker 2: Up for a cart charge.

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Speaker 1: Oh what Yeah, so you're going to see an extra

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Speaker 1: five dollars and fifty cents on your credit card bill

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Speaker 1: coming up, and I just didn't want you to be alarmed.

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Speaker 3: What is a cart charge? What is that for?

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Speaker 2: Oh, the cart charge? You've seen the signs around the store.

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Speaker 3: No, I haven't.

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Speaker 1: Oh huh, that's interesting because they're pretty hard to miss.

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Speaker 1: But it's just now, whenever you're inside the store, if

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Speaker 1: you're using one of our shopping carts, you're considered to

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Speaker 1: be renting it.

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Speaker 3: You've got to be crazy.

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Speaker 1: Uh, actually, ma'am, I'm not crazy. In fact, I've passed

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Speaker 1: a lot of psychological tests that my ex wife.

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Speaker 2: Put me through.

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Speaker 3: I don't care about that. You're calling be talking about

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Speaker 3: a cart charge.

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Speaker 2: Or whatever the right.

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Speaker 3: You're talking about. I'm not paying for that.

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Speaker 1: Well, it's the new store policy, and it's only a

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Speaker 1: quarter per minute. And that's why your total came out

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Speaker 1: to five dollars fifty cents.

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Speaker 3: I don't care how much it is a minute. I

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Speaker 3: could shop at Costco, d Days and better places, Hole Foods.

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Speaker 3: They don't charge you for no damn card.

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Speaker 1: Yes, ma'am, but those stores are profitable, and we don't

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Speaker 1: take a membership fee. I mean, if you want to

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Speaker 1: give us one right now, I would absolutely take it.

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Speaker 3: I'm not paying you nothing extra. Maybe you should find

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Speaker 3: out why that milk spoiled within two days of me

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Speaker 3: bringing it home though.

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Speaker 2: Okay, well this is just a suggestion.

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Speaker 1: How about you spending extra five dollars on some new

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Speaker 1: reading glasses so you can actually read the expiration date

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Speaker 1: on the milk cart.

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Speaker 2: I think that might help you.

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Speaker 3: Justin for you, how about you kiss my tail? Okay,

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Speaker 3: because I'm not paying no five dollars for.

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Speaker 2: No car, and I just sent it through on your

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Speaker 2: credit cards. You should be seeing that on your statement shortly.

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Speaker 3: Well, I bet you won't get it because my card

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Speaker 3: is locked and I keep it locked. I'll cancel the car.

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Speaker 3: I will cancel the car before you get five dollars

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Speaker 3: from me.

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Speaker 2: Okay, we'll see about that.

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Speaker 3: Canceled the car.

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Speaker 1: Well, we'll see, yeah, because we have very high powered

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Speaker 1: lawyers who, okay, deal with you know, difficult people.

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Speaker 3: Not be difficult, because it's gonna be difficult to get

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Speaker 3: that five dollars off my car.

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Speaker 2: And oh no, look at that.

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Speaker 1: I just noticed there's a little ding on your shopping

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Speaker 1: cart too, So unfortunately, we're gonna have to charge you

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Speaker 1: an extra five hundred dollars damage deposit.

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Speaker 2: What the hell is wrong with you? Oh, but don't worry.

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Speaker 1: You could take that up with your car insurance since

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Speaker 1: you're technically driving our carts around the store.

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Speaker 3: I don't even have car insurance. How about that? The

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Speaker 3: gig is on you.

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Speaker 2: Are you bragging to me that you don't have car insurance.

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Speaker 3: When I'm trying to let you know is you cannot

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Speaker 3: get blood? Man? I don't have it.

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Speaker 2: You know.

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Speaker 1: I had an eighty year old lady I spoke to

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Speaker 1: yesterday and her car insurance dropped her because she bumped

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Speaker 1: into a can of beans in our store.

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Speaker 3: Now you're taking advantage of senior citizens.

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Speaker 1: Too, everything, okay, not taking advantage. She was driving recklessly

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Speaker 1: in our store and smashing our cans.

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Speaker 3: Sans driving. She's in a damn car.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, and she shouldn't be because she's eighty. So we agree.

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Speaker 3: You know what, you shouldn't be a manager.

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Speaker 1: You're right, I should be supervising you wherever you work.

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Speaker 3: I should be your supervisors so that way you don't

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Speaker 3: waste people's time. What do you make like man dollards

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Speaker 3: an hour?

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Speaker 2: Ma'am?

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Speaker 1: You don't have car insurance, so I'm pretty sure I'm

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Speaker 1: making more than you.

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Speaker 3: Are you out of your mind?

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Speaker 1: You know this isn't going very well, So maybe I

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Speaker 1: should just ask to speak to the man of the house.

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Speaker 2: How does that sound? Can you put him on the phone?

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Speaker 3: Are you?

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Speaker 1: Are you serious?

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Speaker 3: Man and the house?

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Speaker 2: Let me tell you, I'm just mirroring what you're giving me.

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Speaker 3: You need to talk to the man at the house

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Speaker 3: because when I get my husband on the phone, baby,

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Speaker 3: when I get my husband on.

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Speaker 1: The phone, Oh, your husband Trey, I know him already

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Speaker 1: because he's the guy who sets you up for this

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Speaker 1: prank phone call.

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Speaker 2: What I don't work at the grocery store.

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Speaker 1: My name is Jeff from a show called Brook and

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Speaker 1: Jeffrey in the Morning. And your husband, Trey, I know

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Speaker 1: him because he wanted us to do a phone tap

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Speaker 1: on you.

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Speaker 3: My husband set you up to this, and he told

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Speaker 3: us that.

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Speaker 1: You've been shopping at the same grocery store for years

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Speaker 1: now and you absolutely love it there, so he thought

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Speaker 1: this would get under your skin.

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Speaker 3: Oh my goodness, a damn cart charge. I really thought

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Speaker 3: I was gonna handsome, grive up and I.

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Speaker 2: Love their sushi. Oh my goodness, are you gonna get

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Speaker 2: there and buy sushi? You don't even have car insurance. Eight.

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Speaker 3: On second thought, you need to take that out. That

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Speaker 3: may not be true or not for anybody's the years.

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Speaker 3: That was just me and

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Speaker 2: You brooking Jeffrey's phone taps on the twenties