Speaker 1: The Nicki Gliser Podcastser here's Nikki. Hello here, I am
Speaker 1: welcome to the show. It's Nicky Glazer Podcast. I'm here
Speaker 1: in studio in Saint Louis with Chris Convey. He's here
Speaker 1: again today.
Speaker 2: What's up? How's going, glaze good?
Speaker 3: First time we talked today?
Speaker 2: Just kidding, yeah, right, just in the kitchen. We were
Speaker 2: just chatting in the kitchen cleaning blueberry.
Speaker 1: Oh my god, we should have done the podcast of
Speaker 1: that's what people want to hear. The amount of blueberries
Speaker 1: that are in that bowl right now? Was there a sale?
Speaker 1: Was there a going out of business?
Speaker 4: I was.
Speaker 2: My smoothie was completely ready to go, except I was
Speaker 2: out of blueberries today. So I'd go to the store
Speaker 2: just for blueberries. And I thought to myself, I never
Speaker 2: want this to happen again. So I got four big
Speaker 2: things of blueberries.
Speaker 3: Which we're gonna see in the trash in a week.
Speaker 2: No, no, because he goes in the freezer these Oh okay,
Speaker 2: there's carrots are my problem.
Speaker 3: Carrots are your problem?
Speaker 2: And you you end up cleaning that mess up?
Speaker 1: Yeah I do.
Speaker 2: I will. I don't care how older dirty the carrot is.
Speaker 1: No, doesn't care if there's a little not on it,
Speaker 1: a little cancerous tumor. I will eat right, I'll just
Speaker 1: scrape it off. In fact, I will not. Brian's here,
Speaker 1: Noah's here. What's up, guys? When you're chopping carrots eating carrots,
Speaker 1: do you have to clean off the skin because I
Speaker 1: don't give a fuck them on the skin.
Speaker 5: I never chop a carrot. I always get baby carrots
Speaker 5: in a bag and they're ready to eat.
Speaker 2: They're gross. Baby carrots are gross.
Speaker 1: They get sly.
Speaker 6: Yeah.
Speaker 2: I just think they taste worse than real carrots.
Speaker 1: Chris, No, Yeah, Noah.
Speaker 6: Our friend Halla, who we mentioned yesterday on the podcast,
Speaker 6: she's a huge carrot eater.
Speaker 3: Oh yeah, and she eats like.
Speaker 1: She does, big carrot eater. We don't say that anymore.
Speaker 1: We say hippie, dirty hippy.
Speaker 6: She's a dirty hippie who eats a lot of carrots.
Speaker 6: And she told me ones that baby carrots are just
Speaker 6: like the good parts of a bad carrot.
Speaker 5: Oh, that makes sense, that's all they are. But I've
Speaker 5: never actually thought of doing what you just described. I
Speaker 5: always buy frozen fruit, but I never thought about buying
Speaker 5: blueberries fresh, washing them and then putting them in the freezer.
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's the way I do it. I like it.
Speaker 2: I like it that way.
Speaker 5: That's interesting. I've never I never thought of that.
Speaker 3: Let's walk our way through a Chris Convey smoothie.
Speaker 1: What's going in it?
Speaker 2: We're doing? Uh, and Brian's got a smoothie too, so
Speaker 2: maybe we can compare.
Speaker 1: Let's talk about smoothie.
Speaker 2: But I've actually added an ingredient from Brian. Smoothie into
Speaker 2: mind makes my taste.
Speaker 3: Your body feel good?
Speaker 2: I don't know if it does my body. That's exactly
Speaker 2: what it is, Brian, what is it? I just take
Speaker 2: Brian's word for this. Usually I'll do like five days
Speaker 2: of research.
Speaker 1: That's the fifth most popular girl name right now, right
Speaker 1: after Emma.
Speaker 2: That's one of the dragon's names. Dragons.
Speaker 5: The algae names are kind of like girl names. There's Spirillina.
Speaker 5: There's Clorella, which could also be a girl's name. Gorgeous name,
Speaker 5: gorgeous Chlorella. That's all. That's the only two.
Speaker 2: Colrea come here, Clorilla.
Speaker 3: Yeah, maybe that's her name.
Speaker 2: Into it?
Speaker 1: Yeah, okay, so blueberries, strawberries, yeah, pineapple mm hmm.
Speaker 2: Tons of spinach, weird amount of spinach.
Speaker 1: Probably, Well, that's the thing about spinach you got when
Speaker 1: you're cooking it, certainly you have to use way more,
Speaker 1: way more. When I get a side of spinach at
Speaker 1: a restaurant and it is like a like the size
Speaker 1: of what you would do if you put on, like
Speaker 1: I don't know, a dab of siracha. Like it's like
Speaker 1: that small, like it's a little I just am like
Speaker 1: this person who's back there cooking doesn't eat spin it,
Speaker 1: Like they don't.
Speaker 2: They don't get it.
Speaker 1: They don't get it.
Speaker 5: They're like an entire bag of spinach, like a big
Speaker 5: gallon bag. You put that in the frying pan. That's
Speaker 5: like one fork full of spinach.
Speaker 1: Yeah. Yeah, the amount of spinach you get caught in
Speaker 1: your teeth, that's a half a bag of spinach.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 5: It's like a magic trick.
Speaker 1: It's really, he is insane. It's it is like a magic.
Speaker 5: That's what David Copperfield uses and make things disappears spinach.
Speaker 3: Chris Cony is back on the health train.
Speaker 2: Yeah yeah, yeah, I went when Nicky and I went
Speaker 2: to Zurich, I fell off a big time.
Speaker 1: And that Zurich meaning not the last time we had
Speaker 1: a layover in Zurch like Zike parents.
Speaker 2: Yeah, a month ago.
Speaker 1: Ish, right, I don't know why I'm saying everything, but
Speaker 1: even Zurich with my parents, everything's getting into the karma. Okay.
Speaker 3: When we went to Zurich with my parents, you fell
Speaker 3: off hard.
Speaker 1: You were like.
Speaker 3: All the time, eating healthier.
Speaker 2: I was doing great. I was on my way. I
Speaker 2: was well on my way. But mcdonals, because you remember this,
Speaker 2: Glenn Powell and I were working out at the same gym.
Speaker 3: Well, this is now five years ago.
Speaker 2: In twenty nineteen, twenty nineteen, we were working on the
Speaker 2: same gym. We were chasing the same body at the
Speaker 2: same time.
Speaker 3: Yeah, he got to it.
Speaker 2: He got there first.
Speaker 1: Not only did get there first, he kept it well
Speaker 1: he is. He held onto it. It's not like a
Speaker 1: trophy that gets to switch back and forth. It's like
Speaker 1: it's a lay. He won it forever. Well, before where
Speaker 1: were together. I was close.
Speaker 2: We were Glenn Powell and I were neck and neck.
Speaker 2: He he knows.
Speaker 3: I'd love to be neck and neck.
Speaker 1: Sounds better.
Speaker 2: He and I were working out the same gym, This
Speaker 2: great gym Ultimate Performance. If anybody wants to in LA,
Speaker 2: I think we've got gyms all over the country, look
Speaker 2: up Ultimate Performance. They are the real deal. They will
Speaker 2: get you there, Glenn pal.
Speaker 1: If you would have ruined your life and ruined your
Speaker 1: social life and make your whole existence about counting macros
Speaker 1: and reps.
Speaker 2: And well, you know you want to change things.
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's true. It's just I just don't think it's sustainable.
Speaker 1: But I also I like I like this. It's about
Speaker 1: a goal. It's not sustainable. But I didn't know what
Speaker 1: a calorie was before.
Speaker 3: I still don't know.
Speaker 1: And especially when I go to Europe and they got
Speaker 1: cake cows written on everything.
Speaker 4: Yeah.
Speaker 2: Cat.
Speaker 1: Sometimes it'll be like there's two thousand k cows in
Speaker 1: this and I go, what the fuck is that? And
Speaker 1: I know we shouldn't care about calories and we should
Speaker 1: just listen to our bodies and feel like when we're
Speaker 1: full and just eat the Intuitively. I can't do it, y'all.
Speaker 1: I can't do it. I do pay attention to calories.
Speaker 1: I can't erase it for my brain.
Speaker 5: My high school chemistry teacher taught me a song to
Speaker 5: remember what calories are, to the tune of I Forgot.
Speaker 5: Actually I don't know what the original song is, but
Speaker 5: I can.
Speaker 1: Say calories are how much heat it takes to burn
Speaker 1: one molecule of that isn't that it?
Speaker 5: Oh calorie, Oh calorie, raise one gramma of water one degree.
Speaker 5: I get a Christmas tree.
Speaker 1: That's good. Really, So one calorie is what it takes
Speaker 1: to raise one gramma of will water one degree.
Speaker 5: That's right, And that you missus McCann.
Speaker 1: It's too many degrees of water being raised one degree
Speaker 1: makes you fat for some reason. Don't understand that it's energy.
Speaker 5: Yeah, I mean it's all about energy. Calorie is a
Speaker 5: measurement of energy, and you get calories from eating, you know,
Speaker 5: foods and nutrients. It's all about burning.
Speaker 2: It's burning.
Speaker 5: It's all about burning. Look, i'm those scientists. I just
Speaker 5: know that song.
Speaker 2: But when when you go to McDonald's and they added
Speaker 2: the calories, like in the nineties or whenever, I remember
Speaker 2: being like, what is all what are all these numbers?
Speaker 2: And I never learned.
Speaker 5: I never caved.
Speaker 3: I love my life.
Speaker 1: Before I understood nutritional facts, before I would look at
Speaker 1: that and I would just go.
Speaker 3: It was like before I knew what cursive was.
Speaker 1: I used to look at my mom's handwriting and be like,
Speaker 1: this is hieroglyphics to me. And I remember feeling like
Speaker 1: there was there was this world that I wasn't a
Speaker 1: part of it, and I was so excited that I
Speaker 1: didn't have to know it yet, like it wasn't my
Speaker 1: job to know what that was, right, And I looked
Speaker 1: at it, and I remember looking at her notes, thinking
Speaker 1: I'm so glad I am not expected to know what
Speaker 1: the fuck any of this means. But there is a
Speaker 1: part of your soul that gets broken when you are
Speaker 1: a woman or a man that suffers with eating disorders.
Speaker 1: When you learn about nutritional facts and you start paying
Speaker 1: attention to that stuff your life because your life derails
Speaker 1: into I can't go back to being someone who doesn't
Speaker 1: know what that stuff means and doesn't care. I have
Speaker 1: not had pasta in twenty years. I have not intentionally.
Speaker 1: I've eaten pasta because I've been at a party and
Speaker 1: been like, oh, I guess I have to eat this
Speaker 1: because someone's mom made it. But it's been hell for me.
Speaker 1: I didn't enjoy it. I just wanted to eat it
Speaker 1: and be done with it. I cannot get past why
Speaker 1: because the carb craz carb craz.
Speaker 3: It to me is like embedded in my brain.
Speaker 1: I know carbs do not make you fat, like I
Speaker 1: know that that's I know, it's been totally dispelled. And
Speaker 1: like pasta is healthy for you, and like if you
Speaker 1: eat in moderation, it's fine. I feel crazy if I
Speaker 1: eat a piece of pasta.
Speaker 2: What's your stance on bread?
Speaker 1: Same way? I mean bread is a little bit easier
Speaker 1: for me because it's fluffy or pasta is like condensed bread,
Speaker 1: and it just freaks me out.
Speaker 2: What is pasta but condensed bread?
Speaker 1: And it's a sickening thing to have this. But I
Speaker 1: was even talking about it with my pasta gross, you know,
Speaker 1: and I hear it has a lot of chemicals in it.
Speaker 2: Za gross.
Speaker 1: It's also TikTok where it was like had the most
Speaker 1: tuxic pasta like it was, Yeah, it's.
Speaker 2: Same like bamboo sheets. People are like, oh, bamboo sheets,
Speaker 2: this is all exciting the amount of chemicals they have
Speaker 2: to do to break that down.
Speaker 1: And then you got those pandas sneaking in your room
Speaker 1: at night to snatch your sheets, and you wake up
Speaker 1: and you hear the munching, and you go, what's going on?
Speaker 1: And you got to get those fucking pandas out of
Speaker 1: your room. Yeah, I don't like it. You can't kill
Speaker 1: it's illegal. You have to encourage them to fuck in
Speaker 1: your back because to make more it's very so it
Speaker 1: is really sad.
Speaker 5: But well, I have eucalyptus sheets actually, oh yeah, which
Speaker 5: is also a real thing.
Speaker 1: But you got those Koala sneaker? You double is a
Speaker 1: Asian bear at once?
Speaker 2: What actually a marsupial? I think it is.
Speaker 5: Oh, you're probably Australian marsupial.
Speaker 1: Okay, I thought it was an Asian. But there's Asians
Speaker 1: in Australia, so that they're allowed to travel there and
Speaker 1: live there.
Speaker 5: Well, yeah, no, Chinese tourism is very high in Australia.
Speaker 5: I learned that when I went to Australia.
Speaker 1: I learned that too when I went to a yoga
Speaker 1: class in Australia or a plates class, and it was
Speaker 1: all it was. I was the only non Asian person there.
Speaker 2: What'd you do?
Speaker 1: I did it all right? Yeah, I did all right.
Speaker 1: They were all very lithe and tiny, but yeah, I
Speaker 1: did pretty good. I will say Australian pilates at least
Speaker 1: the place I was going to easy compared to American
Speaker 1: And it makes sense because we're pushing ourselves. We always
Speaker 1: have to like be in pain. And they were like
Speaker 1: think about what a gift this is to your body.
Speaker 1: It was more about like thanking your body for every
Speaker 1: movement and like trying to feel things, and it was
Speaker 1: just much.
Speaker 3: I really loved it.
Speaker 1: It was soothing and the guy that was teaching the
Speaker 1: class just made you feel so good that you even
Speaker 1: showed up, like he didn't expect anything of you.
Speaker 2: Right, whereas the ones in LA are like.
Speaker 5: Well, it's just it's against Australian culture to try to
Speaker 5: rise above.
Speaker 1: Yeah, to try to win. Oh my god, yeah.
Speaker 2: I saw poppy syndrome.
Speaker 1: So I tried to quit pilate. I actually cancel my
Speaker 1: plotate's class today. I was fifteen minutes. You should no,
Speaker 1: I was nine minutes. It was nine minutes out. And
Speaker 1: it's right, like I live very close to it. I
Speaker 1: can get at like six am though he was at
Speaker 1: nine am, and I just was like, I just don't
Speaker 1: want to do it.
Speaker 2: Hey, can somebody convince Glazer that this is a mistake
Speaker 2: to do a pol's class at six pm or six
Speaker 2: pm on a Monday night and then go to a
Speaker 2: eight am pilates class on Tuesday morning. That's you're not
Speaker 2: supposed to do that. It got me back on track,
Speaker 2: so you just needed to jump start your systems.
Speaker 3: And I will say I gave so little in those classes.
Speaker 1: I let myself give so okay, good how much I
Speaker 1: got fifty percent both classes?
Speaker 2: Because even yesterday at the gym, I was like, I'm
Speaker 2: I'm going I'm not going to hurt myself.
Speaker 1: No, yeah, I'm going to be I was like, really,
Speaker 1: I'm doing this new thing where you talk compassionately to
Speaker 1: yourself because I saw TikTok.
Speaker 2: How does it go?
Speaker 5: Nikki?
Speaker 1: You poor thing you have. You are so hard on yourself,
Speaker 1: You poor thing you have. You work so hard. You
Speaker 1: you went to this platates class thinking that this would
Speaker 1: be a good idea and it's not. And you're too
Speaker 1: embarrassed to quit now because you chose one of the
Speaker 1: reformers that's in the middle of the class and not
Speaker 1: on the side, so it's much harder to leave. And
Speaker 1: you also really like this instructor and you don't want
Speaker 1: her to think it was because of her.
Speaker 3: So you're, you poor thing. You're gonna have to dick
Speaker 3: this out.
Speaker 1: And I just talk to myself like that, and you say, NICKI,
Speaker 1: or you say like you talk to yourself, And I
Speaker 1: saw it.
Speaker 3: It's an Andrew Huberman clip.
Speaker 1: And this one was just talking about how like instead
Speaker 1: of when you feel sad, instead of like trying to
Speaker 1: find a way to like focus on the good, like
Speaker 1: just lean into the sad and be like, right, oh,
Speaker 1: it's you know what really sucks that even if the
Speaker 1: thing you're feeling bad about is just so trivial and
Speaker 1: you feel stupid about it, just find a way to
Speaker 1: be like what your best friend would say to you,
Speaker 1: like the best friend that is always compassionate about whatever
Speaker 1: you're going through. Try to mimic what she would say
Speaker 1: in those moments and like kind of and even like
Speaker 1: do this to yourself so like I'm in a plank
Speaker 1: position doing like rubbing my arm, and she's like, what
Speaker 1: do you do? And it makes it much harder to
Speaker 1: hold a blank with one arm. Yourself soothing and.
Speaker 5: You're saying yourself, you got to push harder, Nicki, as you, yeah,
Speaker 5: hold yourself.
Speaker 2: Hard on herself. She's real hard. Yeah, all that.
Speaker 5: Works for you, Nicki, because you're a perfectionist and you
Speaker 5: need to counteract that with some sort of helse.
Speaker 1: So you think I am not a perfectionist. I want
Speaker 1: to I want to combat that a little bit because
Speaker 1: I give up. I totally am okay with being a
Speaker 1: B plus. I want to be a B plus. I
Speaker 1: am happy with that as is like shooting for the
Speaker 1: Star Stars. A plus. I will go for when the
Speaker 1: time calls for it, but not not every time.
Speaker 5: If you know that you're not going to get the
Speaker 5: A plus, then you give up. You settle for that.
Speaker 1: And that's why I'm trying to stick out a plot
Speaker 1: acess and go. You know what, everyone is doing this
Speaker 1: mega donkey push right now? It is no, it is.
Speaker 1: It is so hard. It's just to do it. My
Speaker 1: body has to contort in a way that gets me
Speaker 1: out of alignment. Kirson, if you're listening, you know what
Speaker 1: I'm talking You know what I'm talking about. Like my
Speaker 1: spine is supposed to be along the line on the reformer.
Speaker 1: That means you keep your pelvis straight and your hips
Speaker 1: are straight, and you with one leg push back, so
Speaker 1: you're like pushing back, pushing yourself forward against the reformer
Speaker 1: with your heel. But to compensate because it's so hard,
Speaker 1: my body will shift to one side and it's all
Speaker 1: out of alignment and I'm doing the exercise wrong. To
Speaker 1: do it right. So instead of just doing it wrong,
Speaker 1: to do it right, to just get the exercise done,
Speaker 1: I will modify it and lay on my side, which
Speaker 1: is completely not the exercise. It's way easier. But I
Speaker 1: did that because I was like, you, poor thing, you
Speaker 1: were just on a flight. You sign up for this class.
Speaker 1: You didn't want to accept the penalty to do the class.
Speaker 1: Just do the exercise that's easier and it's gonna be okay.
Speaker 1: And that's what I did, and I felt fine about it.
Speaker 1: So but I do struggle with when do you push
Speaker 1: through and when do you give up? When is it
Speaker 1: self soothing? Or when is it good for you to
Speaker 1: give up on something and cancel the class and not
Speaker 1: go And when is it good to go? No, Nikki,
Speaker 1: complete the class, don't give up. That is the line
Speaker 1: that I don't have a firm grasspot, right.
Speaker 2: You remember that Kobe Bryant, I'm gonna butcher the qute
Speaker 2: should probably look at it. But it's like He's like,
Speaker 2: you make a contract with yourself at the beginning of
Speaker 2: the season that you're going to go to the gym,
Speaker 2: you know, three hundred and sixty days out of the year,
Speaker 2: or you're going to shoot a certain amount of shots.
Speaker 2: I forget exactly what it is, and you go and
Speaker 2: you have to you have to complete the contract with yourself.
Speaker 2: That's his thing. And you were like, I don't think
Speaker 2: that's a good idea that you could get hurt.
Speaker 1: But we renegotiate all the time on my contracts.
Speaker 3: We go back to the table.
Speaker 1: We yes, there's always an opening for renegotiating in my life.
Speaker 1: But I think that's and that's where because there are
Speaker 1: sometimes I walk out of a pilates class that I'm like, man,
Speaker 1: I just have this incomplete feeling all day long of
Speaker 1: like why did I do that? I should have completed it,
Speaker 1: Like the twenty five minutes I did last in the
Speaker 1: class are are for nothing now because it's just I
Speaker 1: didn't complete it.
Speaker 3: So it was like I did. I just feel awful.
Speaker 1: And then there's sometimes where it feels like, no, that
Speaker 1: was the right decision and I can't really figure out
Speaker 1: which one is which.
Speaker 2: Should I play the kobeadit? You sure?
Speaker 5: Okay?
Speaker 4: You know you're out running on the track working out,
Speaker 4: and you start talking to yourself saying, man, my knee
Speaker 4: is really sore right now. Maybe I'm maybe I'm doing
Speaker 4: too much. Man, I need to back off. You know, Man,
Speaker 4: my lungs are burning, and maybe I can just slow
Speaker 4: down here. I'll do like an extra two sets tomorrow.
Speaker 4: You know it'll be okay. Right, that sort of stuff
Speaker 4: like that stuff's dangerous and that's you just got to say,
Speaker 4: you know what, I'm not negotiating with myself. The deal
Speaker 4: was already made. Deal was made when I set out
Speaker 4: at the beginning of the summer and said this is
Speaker 4: the training plan I'm doing. I signed that contract with myself.
Speaker 4: I'm doing it. You know, throughout that process, you'll start
Speaker 4: talking to yourself like, man, I gotta I think I
Speaker 4: need to.
Speaker 1: Maybe if we know the monastic chance behind it, really, Ah,
Speaker 1: you need one of those your background.
Speaker 5: The Redeemed Team. Did you watch that documentary?
Speaker 1: No?
Speaker 5: Well, it's about the two thousand and eight US Olympic
Speaker 5: basketball team who are trying to redeem the country's horrible
Speaker 5: loss the previous Olympics, and Kobe Bryant plays a big
Speaker 5: role in that documentary. You like sports documentaries, I figured.
Speaker 1: What's watch The Redeemed tam.
Speaker 5: Yeah, it's on Netflix. It came out in twenty twenty two.
Speaker 1: Okay, I'll watch that.
Speaker 3: I mean what I heard in that is that he's
Speaker 3: going to get it.
Speaker 1: If your knee is hurting you better you just not
Speaker 1: keep doing those sprints.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean listen, I'm sure it's not perfect for everybody,
Speaker 2: but I really enjoyed it because I do that same
Speaker 2: negotiating yea with myself, not about the knee pain, but
Speaker 2: just about like I don't have it today, I'm tired.
Speaker 2: And sometimes if you push through a little bit of that,
Speaker 2: not the knee pain stuff, but you're like, oh man,
Speaker 2: I've gotten on the bike a bunch and been like, oh,
Speaker 2: it's not here for me today. Yeah, And then I'm like,
Speaker 2: I'll just fit. I'll just do another you know, five
Speaker 2: ten minutes. And then you do them. You do that
Speaker 2: five to ten minutes and you're like, oh, I do
Speaker 2: have it today.
Speaker 5: Oh yeah, and then.
Speaker 2: You can you can really go. But some days you
Speaker 2: just don't have it.
Speaker 1: I think it's about what it really helps is when
Speaker 1: you're having those doubts of like I can't do this,
Speaker 1: just take it down. Like if you're on a run
Speaker 1: and you're like, fuck, I can't do this, start just
Speaker 1: just slow down instead of I've talked about this before
Speaker 1: instead of just stopping, just slow down, because I think
Speaker 1: we just think of like not running the whole time
Speaker 1: is failure. But you will be able to run switch
Speaker 1: faster if you just just jog for a little bit. Yeah,
Speaker 1: and don't stop, just make it less like that plates class,
Speaker 1: I was dead set on leaving, Like I was like,
Speaker 1: after this next thing, I can't do this, And I go,
Speaker 1: why don't you just like modify this to make it
Speaker 1: easier and opposed to giving up, and that really helped
Speaker 1: me get through the whole thing as opposed to like
Speaker 1: it has to be all or nothing. Yeah, just slow
Speaker 1: down a little bit, like if you're on a treadmill,
Speaker 1: just start walking and get through a couple songs and
Speaker 1: go okay, and a couple songs. If I still don't
Speaker 1: like this, then but just just take it, don't. You
Speaker 1: don't have to meet yourself where you were yesterday all
Speaker 1: the time sometimes like.
Speaker 2: Emotionally, what do you mean? What do you mean by that?
Speaker 1: Like if you were if I was on the treadmill
Speaker 1: yesterday and I did this workout and it's like, oh,
Speaker 1: I should be able to repeat that every day. That
Speaker 1: was a hard core, like I might not have it
Speaker 1: the next day because my hormones are in bounced. I
Speaker 1: didn't get enough sleep. I'm just like emotionally not there.
Speaker 1: Like I can do I don't have to repeat. Just
Speaker 1: because I did that yesterday, I should be able to
Speaker 1: do it today. Like, no, it's okay, today's different. I'm different.
Speaker 2: Do you have a tendency to because I have a
Speaker 2: tendency to negotiate with myself in those moments. So that's
Speaker 2: why I think that one hits me, like I will
Speaker 2: be like I'll do to tomorrow or I'll make it.
Speaker 1: Oh, I do the I'll do to tomorrow all the
Speaker 1: time tomorrow. Literally never ever doubled up the next day
Speaker 1: on anything.
Speaker 3: Yeah that I've ever promised myself.
Speaker 1: We got to go to break, and I promise I'll
Speaker 1: give way more on the next break or on the
Speaker 1: next double. Yeah, I'm gonna double up and it's gonna
Speaker 1: be even better because I was kind of slowing down
Speaker 1: this first one. Okay, we'll be right back and then
Speaker 1: we're back. So we almost bought a house. Oh we were.
Speaker 1: We've been like looking for a house because we got
Speaker 1: a dog and I've been talking about it. You know,
Speaker 1: we want that yard and that's been the big and
Speaker 1: we're just kind of like bursting at the seams with
Speaker 1: crap in every room and we are ready and I
Speaker 1: am ready. And we were looking at a house and
Speaker 1: it's bricks.
Speaker 6: St.
Speaker 5: Louis houses have bricks on the.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it was most beautiful, beautiful painted brick was kind
Speaker 2: of known for was it was it brick?
Speaker 1: I don't you could ask me about this house, and
Speaker 1: I promise you, I don't know. We saw this house
Speaker 1: for ten minutes.
Speaker 2: What was the roof made?
Speaker 3: Well, and now I know what the roof was. It's
Speaker 3: called give me the first letter. It's called.
Speaker 1: Shake shake. Yeah. Yeah, it's a shake wooden roof that
Speaker 1: has to be replaced every one hundred years, sixty sixty
Speaker 1: to one hundred years. And so we was going to
Speaker 1: use the house eighty three, so it was going to
Speaker 1: be needed to be replaced eighty one.
Speaker 2: Yeah, around right right around in the eighties or.
Speaker 1: Yeah, so it's gonna be you have to be replaced
Speaker 1: the next ten years or so probably, but that was yeah,
Speaker 1: so it could be president or not. And then we uh, yeah,
Speaker 1: we we saw it for like ten minutes because we
Speaker 1: only we had to tour it right before we were
Speaker 1: going to the airport to go to Europe. Little did
Speaker 1: we know we didn't need to rush to the airport.
Speaker 1: We could have just I mean.
Speaker 2: Little little did you know?
Speaker 5: What do you mean?
Speaker 2: Well, I knew we had time.
Speaker 1: No, I mean like we had way more time because
Speaker 1: it took us like three days to get to Europe.
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, yeah, sorry.
Speaker 1: So we we rushed through the house, which actually I.
Speaker 2: Liked every time we see a house, it should be
Speaker 2: right before NICKI has to get to these.
Speaker 3: I love having an out like we gotta go.
Speaker 1: We had not time to chat like I got and
Speaker 1: I really didn't need any more time. I didn't feel
Speaker 1: like this is I wish I could see it again.
Speaker 1: Oh my god, whatever the dog's doing right now is
Speaker 1: really good. I didn't feel like I needed much more.
Speaker 1: I was like, okay, this is this is good. I
Speaker 1: get a sense of it. I'm someone who can make
Speaker 1: a decision really quickly.
Speaker 5: Oh yeah, how big is the house? How many bedrooms?
Speaker 1: It was like four.
Speaker 2: Bedrooms, thirty eight hundred square feet.
Speaker 5: That's pretty big.
Speaker 2: Yeah yeah, but it's it's it felt like yeah big,
Speaker 2: but within the it felt like a smaller house, but
Speaker 2: it wasn't.
Speaker 1: It's hard because we're going to get a really nice house,
Speaker 1: but we don't have a family, and like Saint Louis,
Speaker 1: all their houses are like for people with family.
Speaker 2: Dining room, here's where the kids are. Here's that.
Speaker 3: I'm never gonna throw a dinner party.
Speaker 1: I'm never gonna.
Speaker 3: Use a stone like Chris.
Speaker 1: We're gonna learn to cook.
Speaker 5: Like you know, you have the girls.
Speaker 3: Girls trip, we are gonna go to Serina's. What are
Speaker 3: we doing like this?
Speaker 2: Like? No, this house would have been perfect for girls trips.
Speaker 1: Actually yeah, but I don't want to be at my
Speaker 1: house on a girl's trip.
Speaker 3: No offense to my girls. I just I want to
Speaker 3: go for my This.
Speaker 2: Was your birthday party, like you know, three or four
Speaker 2: months ago. This house would have been great for that.
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's true. That's true. Yeah, there's there's a pool.
Speaker 1: There was a tennis court.
Speaker 5: Are you kidding at this house?
Speaker 4: Yeah?
Speaker 5: Yeah, tennis court, yes, tennis.
Speaker 2: I do not play tennis.
Speaker 1: But I was going to because the only reason I
Speaker 1: realized the only reason I don't play tennis is because
Speaker 1: ever since I was a child and my dad would
Speaker 1: take me up to the tennis court, I am so
Speaker 1: embarrassed about being bad at tennis, and when you're bad
Speaker 1: at tennis, it's not just about other people at the
Speaker 1: tennis court might see you being bad, that's one thing,
Speaker 1: but when you're bad, it affects their game because your
Speaker 1: balls flying over into their court. So like, I can't
Speaker 1: stand being bad in front of people, and then I
Speaker 1: also can't stand that my badness is going to impact
Speaker 1: their goodness, and so I would never go. So this
Speaker 1: was like, oh my god, I can maybe learn to
Speaker 1: be good at tennis enough.
Speaker 3: This is like with pilates.
Speaker 1: I had to go privately to get in shape good
Speaker 1: enough to go take it in front of people in
Speaker 1: a clase.
Speaker 5: So I took.
Speaker 1: Privates and now I don't take privates anymore because I
Speaker 1: know what I'm doing. So this would have been privates
Speaker 1: for me. Even tennis lessons privates, well, even lessons which
Speaker 1: I did take as a kid. You would be practicing,
Speaker 1: you would have your tennis lesson and in front of
Speaker 1: private tennis lesson at a court where other people were playing,
Speaker 1: so people still were witnessing it.
Speaker 3: It's too embarrassing.
Speaker 1: I don't like it.
Speaker 5: You can also actually have extra lines on there and
Speaker 5: making it into a pickleball court, so you can play
Speaker 5: what I'm talking about.
Speaker 1: I definitely thought about that.
Speaker 2: It was a different kind of.
Speaker 5: Material, ah, the wrong material.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 2: But the house was great. It was perfect, and in
Speaker 2: the end it didn't work out and it was like
Speaker 2: perfectly like down the priced all the things that that
Speaker 2: ended up happening. We were like, we would be happy
Speaker 2: if it happened and happy if it didn't happen.
Speaker 3: I got a little bit into a war.
Speaker 2: Well there was there's something going on, and I guess
Speaker 2: Ark bought it somebody else. You know, we went up
Speaker 2: pretty high on yeah, like a really decent amount, like
Speaker 2: twenty five percent. It's pretty good, and we thought.
Speaker 5: We got a cash it's a mortgage or that's all.
Speaker 2: No, well whatever it is. But we were we put
Speaker 2: together a good offer and they end up going with
Speaker 2: somebody else. But it was like I was, I was
Speaker 2: like forty one. I was like fifty one forty nine
Speaker 2: on the whole deal.
Speaker 3: Me too, And I feel like that's.
Speaker 2: But the house is perfect. That was perfect, perfect, it's closer.
Speaker 1: You know. Really excited about though, is that we get
Speaker 1: to do this all over again because.
Speaker 2: You were excited about that.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I do now, I really I don't.
Speaker 1: I don't want to spend a lot of time looking
Speaker 1: at houses, and I don't. I've already talked about the podcast.
Speaker 1: I don't want to talk to realtors. I don't want
Speaker 1: to pretend I like a place. I don't want to
Speaker 1: have to do the schmoozy shit. I hate that, and
Speaker 1: I've been told that it really is exhausting, and I
Speaker 1: and I and I don't. I'm not apologizing. I do
Speaker 1: not like it, and it's the way it should be.
Speaker 1: We shouldn't have to be fake nice to people that
Speaker 1: are selling something that's millions of dollars. I shouldn't have
Speaker 1: to justify why I don't like it. I should be
Speaker 1: able to just be like nope and then turn and leave,
Speaker 1: and no one should be like she's a bitch, Like
Speaker 1: it's not. It's okay that I don't like something that's
Speaker 1: three million dollars.
Speaker 2: But you're coming up with that idea that you have
Speaker 2: to schmooze with the.
Speaker 1: Real because everyone that comes with me does like when
Speaker 1: we view a house, well, we're just you're being nice.
Speaker 2: Well no, I mean you're just being a human being.
Speaker 2: I'm not. I'm not like like becoming some different person
Speaker 2: than it's like I'm just being like, oh I like this,
Speaker 2: I like that. Oh this isn't going to work for us?
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, no, I I get that. I that's the
Speaker 1: part that I just I just when I want to leave,
Speaker 1: I just want to leave and I don't want anything.
Speaker 5: I have a hack hack because I did that this weekend.
Speaker 5: I I was walking my dog and I know there
Speaker 5: was an open house around the corner from me, and
Speaker 5: I always go to the open houses to see how
Speaker 5: much you know they cost.
Speaker 1: Yeah, and just to like snoop around see how they.
Speaker 5: Before I walked into the open house, I called my
Speaker 5: dad and I was on the phone with my dad
Speaker 5: when I walked in, So when the realtor stood up,
Speaker 5: I was like, Hi, I'm on the phone. I just
Speaker 5: want to see look around and see you have a
Speaker 5: sheet and that They couldn't say anything to me.
Speaker 1: They can't you I'm on the phone, like I'm.
Speaker 5: On the phone my dad. But I wanted to see
Speaker 5: the place. And I was in and out in like
Speaker 5: five minutes.
Speaker 1: That's so good.
Speaker 5: It worked great, and outside my dog with me. But
Speaker 5: three point four million dollars this house was how mnuch
Speaker 5: your feet hold? I will go get talk amongst yourselves.
Speaker 5: I'll get that sheet because this is this is, let me.
Speaker 1: Say, believable talking on the phone thing I can't do
Speaker 1: because I'm usually touring it with my Raildor and Chris
Speaker 1: and like one of our moms, So that wi't work.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean you don't enjoy it.
Speaker 1: The car is good.
Speaker 2: You don't enjoy this process as much as the rest
Speaker 2: of us too. Like my mom is a house guy.
Speaker 2: Your mom is a real estate person. Total house guy. Yeah,
Speaker 2: me house guy. We love houses. I would go. I
Speaker 2: would go look at new houses every day of the
Speaker 2: week if I had the time.
Speaker 1: That and what I like Zillow. I'm a Zillow house girl.
Speaker 1: I like looking at quick pictures. I like looking at
Speaker 1: aerial shots. I like sending links and looking at links,
Speaker 1: going and touring the house. If we're alone with our
Speaker 1: us four, even if you guys are house people, I
Speaker 1: could stay all day. But like being watched by someone
Speaker 1: who either lives there or someone who's showing the place.
Speaker 1: I feel like I feel nervous.
Speaker 2: Who's so you think they've got expectations of you and
Speaker 2: you that you have to meet. But we're just looking
Speaker 2: at a house.
Speaker 3: Yeah, But but Noah, what were you just saying?
Speaker 1: Who is home?
Speaker 6: I think that's so awkward if anyone is home, Like
Speaker 6: when you.
Speaker 1: Try to babysit and the parents would be home while
Speaker 1: you babysit. It's like me, I'm not gonna do anything weird.
Speaker 1: Just trust speed.
Speaker 2: It's the real estate agent and that's that's. Oh god,
Speaker 2: It's totally typical.
Speaker 3: And they're always nice.
Speaker 1: They're always just like, I'm gonna leave you guys alone,
Speaker 1: and they kind of just go sit in a room
Speaker 1: and like scroll on their phones, which is like, so
Speaker 1: the way this it's fine.
Speaker 3: It's all my own shit.
Speaker 1: This is not something that anyone who's listening in the
Speaker 1: Saint Louis area who's like, well, I'm going to show
Speaker 1: a house to Nikki and she's gonna hate that I'm there.
Speaker 1: It's not that this is my own stuff that I'm
Speaker 1: putting on it. That is not your problem.
Speaker 2: I don't think any of these people they do this
Speaker 2: hundreds of times a year. I don't think they're taking
Speaker 2: anything personally about a house that isn't theirs that they're
Speaker 2: trying to sell. That's a good point, Like they're not
Speaker 2: like they're they're like, wait, you don't think the breakfast
Speaker 2: nook is big enough.
Speaker 1: Here's my problem is sometimes I walk into a house
Speaker 1: and I know right away I hate it and I
Speaker 1: will never want to be in it, and then I
Speaker 1: have to walk through the rest of it, and that
Speaker 1: is the problem.
Speaker 2: Well, do you want to in those situations? Would you
Speaker 2: just want to leave and let me and your mom
Speaker 2: go through it?
Speaker 1: Yes? But no, because then you guys will be like
Speaker 1: I predict you guys will be like, she's such a
Speaker 1: stick in the mud and she's doing this like obstinate
Speaker 1: teenager thing of like like why can't she just tough
Speaker 1: it out? And so I'll just tough it out. But
Speaker 1: I will say that I some times like I just
Speaker 1: don't like doing anything. I'm like Kim Ktrol, I don't
Speaker 1: want to do anything for even a second that I
Speaker 1: don't want to do right, But which is a bratty
Speaker 1: thing to say.
Speaker 2: But I think you're also not realizing that it's a
Speaker 2: learning experience to go through houses to see what you
Speaker 2: do and don't like about it. So if you go
Speaker 2: into the first room and say I'm never going to
Speaker 2: get this house, you're missing out on an opportunity to
Speaker 2: learn about other things that you might like about it.
Speaker 3: That's a good point. That's a good point.
Speaker 1: I guess I would like to say I hate it,
Speaker 1: and I want everyone to know that we're just now
Speaker 1: going through this to learn things, and we're not we're
Speaker 1: not entertaining getting this, and I'm not going to pretend
Speaker 1: that I want to ina getting it.
Speaker 2: It's so unnecessary, it's like completely unnecessary. But why do
Speaker 2: you want Why do you have the urge to be like,
Speaker 2: just so everybody here knows I'm not getting this house
Speaker 2: when that doesn't matter to anybody in that moment. Okay,
Speaker 2: it's the same thing the matter to zero people. And
Speaker 2: then at the end of you be like, I'm not
Speaker 2: interested in It's like okay, cool.
Speaker 1: It's the same thing as first dates, Like I wanted,
Speaker 1: I need this person to know I will never be
Speaker 1: with them, like I I but tough like sticking on.
Speaker 1: That's why I didn't go on dates, because I think
Speaker 1: this person I will know immediately and if I have
Speaker 1: to stay after I know, it's no it feels and
Speaker 1: I'm sorry to compare it to this like a little
Speaker 1: bit of a rape, no much micro micro' doing something
Speaker 1: against your will, sexual harassment.
Speaker 3: Well, that's what That's what micro rape as well.
Speaker 1: Like I'm saying it is, you are enduring something that
Speaker 1: you don't want and that you actively just doing it
Speaker 1: for niceties.
Speaker 3: What you're doing it to be nice.
Speaker 5: There are.
Speaker 3: They're not as funny and give me a break.
Speaker 1: God, you guys are gonna get me canceled by your reactions.
Speaker 3: I obviously don't think that walking.
Speaker 1: Through a house I don't want is akin to rape.
Speaker 1: I'm not saying that it's I'm making a joke, but
Speaker 1: I do think that it is a micro It's a
Speaker 1: feeling that is on the spectrum where the rape is
Speaker 1: like miles and miles thousands of miles on the one side.
Speaker 1: And then walking through a house you don't like and
Speaker 1: having to endure something you don't want to do and
Speaker 1: you already know you don't want to do and you're
Speaker 1: only doing it because you're scared or because you're being nice,
Speaker 1: is on the spectrum.
Speaker 5: Final answer, Yes, No, there's a lot of things like
Speaker 5: the comedian and sometimes.
Speaker 1: I make comparisons that are bonkers. Yeah, like the other day,
Speaker 1: fat person.
Speaker 5: I mean sometimes I feel like, you know, I'm walking
Speaker 5: around my shoes ontied. I got to bend over and
Speaker 5: tie it, and I'm like, this is like a rape.
Speaker 1: No, it's not the same way. They're not tying your
Speaker 1: shoe because you're scared. I mean maybe you are. You're
Speaker 1: scared of tripping. You're not tying your shoe because you're
Speaker 1: trying to appease someone else. Maybe yeah, if you're walking
Speaker 1: to a restaurant and they're like sure, Like that's the
Speaker 1: reason I got mad at a golf course when they're like,
Speaker 1: you can't come in and play because you don't have
Speaker 1: a collared shirt.
Speaker 3: I was like, if I went out and bought a collared.
Speaker 1: Shirt, It's like it fade in with these people, Like
Speaker 1: that is an indignity. I don't want to suffer, and
Speaker 1: I feel it makes me hate myself that I'm giving
Speaker 1: into this thing I don't even like because I'm trying
Speaker 1: to fit in and be nice and not get it.
Speaker 5: Is funny. There's a size like a character who has
Speaker 5: dealt a minor inconvenience. Then they respond by going, you're
Speaker 5: ripping me.
Speaker 1: Well, okay, I will say that. Into the woods there
Speaker 1: is a the Witch's wrap. She goes he was rooting
Speaker 1: through my rude bag, goes rating my Arugala ripping up
Speaker 1: the RAPI and my champion, my favorite and in.
Speaker 3: It she goes, he was me raping me, she says it.
Speaker 1: And so that is why I feel like it is
Speaker 1: a term that I can just Obviously, if I had
Speaker 1: been raped, I probably wouldn't make these jokes. I haven't been.
Speaker 1: I know that I could be. I know that I'm
Speaker 1: lucky that I haven't. I'm not minimizing rape. I am
Speaker 1: if you have been, Please don't take offense that I'm
Speaker 1: saying this. I am obviously making a joke. But yes,
Speaker 1: I think that if you looked up the definition of rape,
Speaker 1: this would fit in it.
Speaker 6: Well, actually I just looked up the definition of rape
Speaker 6: and it's the second definition is an outrageous violationation.
Speaker 3: Okay, so I said it's a micro rape.
Speaker 1: So it is a micro outageous violation.
Speaker 6: Or it's a micro act or instance of robbing or
Speaker 6: despoiling or carrying away a person by force.
Speaker 3: Okay, I feel force.
Speaker 2: And yes, I prefer the word in dignity.
Speaker 1: I know I'm a.
Speaker 2: Big these there's constantly weird face with these just small
Speaker 2: little yes, I have to use it instead of little
Speaker 2: you have to say whittle wittle.
Speaker 5: Rapes every single day we're dealing with.
Speaker 1: No, I'm offended.
Speaker 5: Speaking of rapes. I do have this the sheet from
Speaker 5: this house.
Speaker 1: Yell how many square feet? What are we dealing with?
Speaker 5: So zero point sixteen acres for the lot. The entire
Speaker 5: lot is points of fine which small. That's small.
Speaker 1: I do not know what an acre was is like
Speaker 1: songs about Okay, okay.
Speaker 5: The proximen square feet of the house is twenty six hundred.
Speaker 5: It's four bedrooms, five bathrooms, single family duplex. No pool,
Speaker 5: hardly a backyard.
Speaker 1: Does it say no pool?
Speaker 5: It does? It literally says I'll show it, says pool. No,
Speaker 5: I don't want to Actually, I don't want.
Speaker 1: To show the honey.
Speaker 5: Yeah, it says pool.
Speaker 6: No.
Speaker 5: Three point four million dollars. This is better saying real
Speaker 5: That's unacceptable in America for houses to cost that much.
Speaker 1: Oh, I mean, like that's some good real estate though,
Speaker 1: like is in Culver City, like so nice and so
Speaker 1: safe and.
Speaker 5: It is, But three point four million dollars, that's like
Speaker 5: that's a that should be a mansion. You can go
Speaker 5: to you know, uh uh Ventura and get a mansion
Speaker 5: for three point four million dollars. Why are we why
Speaker 5: is this house this duplex single floor, one floor duplex
Speaker 5: that's only slightly bigger than my apartment four million dollars?
Speaker 3: Understand millions of dollars?
Speaker 1: Like it doesn't make sense to me when it's when
Speaker 1: we were like going up on price for this house,
Speaker 1: I was like, yeah, let's just go blank, point blank,
Speaker 1: and I was just adding points to it.
Speaker 2: Yeah, not even like and I just loved the point.
Speaker 1: I won't get. I didn't get a T shirt because
Speaker 1: it's like forty I think it's ten dollars too much.
Speaker 1: Yet I was just throwing points on to this house
Speaker 1: that I've seen for ten minutes.
Speaker 2: Nicky's concept of money is like completely hilarious, Like she, yeah,
Speaker 2: she won't buy a T shirt that feels overpriced, but
Speaker 2: then we'll have no problem adding points to a million
Speaker 2: when it comes to the house.
Speaker 1: Problem does even does it even bat an eye equal
Speaker 1: money to me? Like it just is like it's it's.
Speaker 5: So also like a future expense. It's like it's not
Speaker 5: really concrete.
Speaker 1: And I do know that now. It's like if I
Speaker 1: know that, obviously I could resell this house. Like it's
Speaker 1: just me put my bank is now this house. I
Speaker 1: finally understand this concept of like I'm not actually money,
Speaker 1: it's just like a concept of the money. And it's
Speaker 1: just if my money was in the stock market, which
Speaker 1: it is, it's just as risky, if not more than
Speaker 1: putting it in this house.
Speaker 2: It's all risk. It's all risk management. That's the entire
Speaker 2: thing about investing.
Speaker 6: Yeah, well, but like sa are the safest investment. Oh
Speaker 6: real estate? Yeah, real estate.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I mean everyone knows that.
Speaker 1: I just was scared of getting a house because of
Speaker 1: like maintenance and stuff and like having to call a
Speaker 1: tree trimmorments and commitments. But this one I could, I
Speaker 1: knew I could. You could just sell it, like you
Speaker 1: can get out of it. And also it didn't have
Speaker 1: a basement. And I feel like most of my friends
Speaker 1: who have house issues it emanates in the basement.
Speaker 2: They're always talking about the basement.
Speaker 1: It's flooding, it's too dry, there's mold, there's mice. By
Speaker 1: the way, can I just say, if you are someone
Speaker 1: who's dealing with mice or any kind of rodent situation
Speaker 1: in your house, if you get a sticky trap, you're
Speaker 1: the worst person, a serial killer, You're a horrible Do
Speaker 1: not get I know that glue traps are readily available.
Speaker 1: You're a masochist, you're a bad person. Just get an
Speaker 1: instant kill thing if you want to kill them. I
Speaker 1: just bought Taylor a bunch of humane mouse traps.
Speaker 2: Have you seen the ones where they just go into
Speaker 2: a bucket and they like, they just climb up a
Speaker 2: ramp to a bucket and then they just go.
Speaker 3: Poop like warrior?
Speaker 2: Yeah, yes, stunt.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 5: I have one that they like a piece of cheese
Speaker 5: and then like a marble goes down a shoot and
Speaker 5: then spins around a thing and then it goes that's
Speaker 5: fun and then eventually a cage drops on them.
Speaker 1: Okay, go video. Yeah, just don't get glue traps. But yes,
Speaker 1: I think most of the problems, well this is just
Speaker 1: just no basement. And I liked that because no basement,
Speaker 1: there's no kids coming over being like can we come playing?
Speaker 1: Like a basement's just like you're a house for kids.
Speaker 2: Yeah right, yeah, it kind of it was like it
Speaker 2: would prevent us from having kids.
Speaker 3: Or getting murdered down there, Like.
Speaker 2: Yeah, you'd never get murdered.
Speaker 5: Every horror movie, you know, you dye someone's dying in
Speaker 5: the basement.
Speaker 1: I mean absolutely there's there's' they're murky, they're mysterious.
Speaker 5: When I was in college, I had a house that
Speaker 5: I lived in with four other guys, and there was
Speaker 5: this vent that I guess this doesn't really have a
Speaker 5: lot to do with basements, but this would remind me
Speaker 5: of There was this vent in the kitchen on the
Speaker 5: kitchen floor, which I guess had something to do with
Speaker 5: the air system, and whenever we would have house parties,
Speaker 5: somebody would pee into the vent inevitably and that would
Speaker 5: go down to the basement. Oh, this is what your
Speaker 5: this is what you pay your kids to go to
Speaker 5: college to do.
Speaker 1: It's college houses are disgusting, the stories and things that happened.
Speaker 5: No, I mean, I can't believe I slept in that
Speaker 5: house when there were like every couple of weekends someone
Speaker 5: would be pissing in.
Speaker 1: The air vent and that was just a given.
Speaker 5: Yeah, And how many people have peed in the air
Speaker 5: vents over the decades this house has been there. It
Speaker 5: was considered the party house because the address it was
Speaker 5: right across the street from campus and the address three
Speaker 5: two It was three two one, and everyone called it
Speaker 5: the three two to one house. And when we first
Speaker 5: moved into the house. Random dudes would show up to
Speaker 5: our house with beer and be like what's going on
Speaker 5: and be like, what are you talking about? It like
Speaker 5: party time, because it was like established this house was
Speaker 5: the party house, and we had to re establish the
Speaker 5: culture of the house and say only parties when we
Speaker 5: throw the parties.
Speaker 3: So you would go in that basement to clean up
Speaker 3: the piss.
Speaker 1: We would do nothing.
Speaker 5: People would just piss in the event and be like, well,
Speaker 5: there's nothing we can do in the kitchen. It would
Speaker 5: go into the event and then into the basement.
Speaker 1: What's your policy on peeing in public? Like, you would
Speaker 1: never do that. I can't imagine you would do it
Speaker 1: in a way that anyone would ever see you do it.
Speaker 1: Because we were at the fish show and in the
Speaker 1: parking garage at five pm at night, six pm at
Speaker 1: night was a guy was pissing. And I saw at
Speaker 1: SLEW which is Saint Louis University on campus. I saw
Speaker 1: a grown man pissing and I saw the tip of
Speaker 1: his penis. I saw his penis as he was holding it.
Speaker 1: It was so and I just gave him a disgusted look.
Speaker 1: I think he was already drunk, So I guess drunkenness
Speaker 1: plays a part in this. But it is cool that
Speaker 1: you guys can do that anywhere and just let it go,
Speaker 1: like empty your bladders wherever. But totally disgusting. I couldn't
Speaker 1: believe I had to see that was vile, vile. Yeah,
Speaker 1: but it is nice that you can do it.
Speaker 2: It's one of the greatest things about being a guy.
Speaker 1: I would say, I would think so, but we didn't
Speaker 1: get the house. And I'm I am happy. I know
Speaker 1: you're like, what, No, you're not. I am happy to
Speaker 1: look at Zillow yeah, links and to like, now it
Speaker 1: opens up a world because now I know what our
Speaker 1: limit is. Yes, now, and we went a little bit
Speaker 1: above what I thought was safe to go, and now
Speaker 1: it's like, okay, let's look in this range.
Speaker 6: Yeah.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it kind of changed the range. I mean, we
Speaker 2: did learn that to get something that we love is
Speaker 2: going to take a little bit more than what we
Speaker 2: wanted to do.
Speaker 5: Yeah, but that's always the case. You always got to
Speaker 5: pay a little bit more.
Speaker 1: You know what I'm looking for in a house, Like
Speaker 1: what my number one requirement is? I want a balcony.
Speaker 5: Oh yeah, balconies are amazing.
Speaker 1: I love just being in my room and being able
Speaker 1: to step out of the balcony balcony and have like
Speaker 1: an alone moment or even with you, like but like
Speaker 1: having a little it's like a room of one's own
Speaker 1: because we're going to share a bedroom, but like a balcony,
Speaker 1: I feel like would be like like just a place
Speaker 1: where I can go and just get it.
Speaker 3: I don't know, I just why do I want a
Speaker 3: balcony so you can.
Speaker 5: Be outside without putting shoes on and just kind of
Speaker 5: outside for a little bit. Doesn't have to be a
Speaker 5: whole thing.
Speaker 2: Well, that actually leads into totally. That leads into something
Speaker 2: we were just talking about. Oh yeah, being outside like
Speaker 2: without the effort of any outdoorsiness at all.
Speaker 3: Yes, getting some fresh air without.
Speaker 1: Having to leave the house or own anything from ARII yeah, yes,
Speaker 1: we will get to that in a second. Because on
Speaker 1: girls Chut today there was inspired by my therapy. I
Speaker 1: was I'm really focusing on why. Well, we'll talk about
Speaker 1: what we get back. I don't need to get into
Speaker 1: it now, we'll be right back.
Speaker 4: Okay.
Speaker 1: So I was in therapy yesterday and I was talking
Speaker 1: about a thing that I've talked about this podcast a ton,
Speaker 1: which is like being down on myself because I'm not
Speaker 1: like other people and I just wish I liked things
Speaker 1: that I don't like, which is always boggled Chris Conby's.
Speaker 2: It makes no sense to me why.
Speaker 1: It's like I don't like things you don't like.
Speaker 2: Unique to a certain type of person. And then maybe
Speaker 2: just girls Chat, I don't know if everybody on girls.
Speaker 1: Chat, No, no one does.
Speaker 2: Nobody, no, everyone is a little bit like that.
Speaker 1: She yes, it's me and Sara Lena. I mean, yeah,
Speaker 1: I just I don't know, girl, this I just heard.
Speaker 1: I just heard our friend got cancer, and should I
Speaker 1: get cancer? I don't know, girl, it just sounds maybe
Speaker 1: I should do Like we make jokes that like, she
Speaker 1: just anything anyone does. She's like, maybe I should, I
Speaker 1: should do that.
Speaker 2: But nobody else is like that.
Speaker 1: So it's me and Sara Lena. Okay, it's that those
Speaker 1: are the ones that really suffer this. Everyone else in
Speaker 1: gross chat definitely acknowledges that they don't like things, but
Speaker 1: they don't seem to want.
Speaker 3: They don't care that they don't like.
Speaker 2: It, So explain what it is. Basically, it's like you
Speaker 2: are obsessed with one figuring out why you don't like things.
Speaker 2: That other people like it.
Speaker 1: I would. I would, because Anya was saying, like, what
Speaker 1: what is it about this? Like if you had if
Speaker 1: you did like the outdoors and you did like fresh
Speaker 1: linens and organizing closets and having your jewelry organized or
Speaker 1: whatever it is that you want hard like drangesh, Yeah,
Speaker 1: if you liked harvesting high ranges, which is something on
Speaker 1: you was doing the other day that I could not
Speaker 1: have felt more detached from it, and like how that
Speaker 1: would ever be something anyone would want to do or
Speaker 1: feel pride in, Like I can't connect to it at all,
Speaker 1: and it makes me feel sad.
Speaker 3: And why is that?
Speaker 1: And I think because a girl who harvests hydranges as
Speaker 1: someone who like is like taking their time to smell
Speaker 1: things and like likes beautiful things. Thus they are beautiful,
Speaker 1: Thus they are desirable. Yet thus they get attention from
Speaker 1: people as being like feminine and desirable. And I feel
Speaker 1: like that is what I want. At the bottom of
Speaker 1: it all is I want to be desirable. And why
Speaker 1: do I want to be desirable? Because being desirable gets
Speaker 1: you status. Why do I want status? Because I want
Speaker 1: to survive. It's just a survival thing.
Speaker 2: That seems like when you're someone.
Speaker 1: Who isn't fun and feminine and everyone doesn't want to
Speaker 1: like have sex with or like, you know, being feminine
Speaker 1: is like men want to have sex with you, which
Speaker 1: is a valuable thing. You will keep a place in
Speaker 1: the tribe if you are someone who's like, I don't
Speaker 1: like that stuff, like you're no fun and people go
Speaker 1: get out of here, old woman, and they cast you
Speaker 1: aside and you have to fend for yourself. And we
Speaker 1: know as a society, and if you are someone who
Speaker 1: is cast astray, you will not survive.
Speaker 2: But that's like, that's I think that's been cynical about
Speaker 2: why people are motivated to do things Like Anya's not
Speaker 2: hasting hydranges because she is trying to cultivate a personality
Speaker 2: of somebody that likes doing it. I know, like she's
Speaker 2: doing that on her own.
Speaker 1: But well, I would say it's the same thing as
Speaker 1: like I'm jealous of a girl that has a tiny
Speaker 1: waist and huge tits and a perfectly proportionate hipter waist ratio.
Speaker 2: Wait, who are you talking about?
Speaker 1: Exactly right, it's I'm jealous of that? Why is it?
Speaker 1: It's not okay, But it's more socially understandable to envy
Speaker 1: a woman's eye color or hair texture than it is
Speaker 1: to envy her natural disposition to like a flower.
Speaker 2: Range thing totally like that. All of that makes perfect
Speaker 2: sense to me. That's why this is so perplexing is
Speaker 2: I've never known somebody who wants to like, like, I
Speaker 2: want to play piano more, but I don't want to
Speaker 2: want like I don't like It's so strange that you
Speaker 2: are jealous of these desires that they have, not that
Speaker 2: you want to do those.
Speaker 1: Oh interesting, I yeah, I guess there is a distinction. Well,
Speaker 1: I think that if I know that, if I wanted
Speaker 1: to do them, I could do them. But the thing
Speaker 1: that's getting me in the way of doing them is
Speaker 1: wanting to do them. So I want the thing that's
Speaker 1: going to get me to do it.
Speaker 2: But why do you even want something that you don't want.
Speaker 2: That's the thing that I don't understand.
Speaker 1: Because it would make me more desirable and more socially acceptable.
Speaker 2: Well, I think it's it's also like you feel like,
Speaker 2: what's wrong with me that I don't want that? I
Speaker 2: think that's a bigger, a big part of it.
Speaker 3: I wrote it down in my notebook yesterday. What's wrong
Speaker 3: with me?
Speaker 1: And I was like, oh, that's the next title of
Speaker 1: my special of my life, of my next song I'm
Speaker 1: going to write is What's wrong with Me? Because that
Speaker 1: is like an underlying issue in my life of like
Speaker 1: why why, Like honestly, my parents used to ask me
Speaker 1: what's wrong with you all the time. It's there's something
Speaker 1: it's ingrained in me in the way that eating carbs
Speaker 1: will make me fat, even though I know it's not true,
Speaker 1: like there's something wrong with me that I don't like adventure,
Speaker 1: which is something my family does value very much. In fact,
Speaker 1: my sister made a list of did I say this
Speaker 1: on the podcast yesterday?
Speaker 2: Seven things about your dad? Yeah, seventy for seventy.
Speaker 1: Did I say this that you did? No. My sister
Speaker 1: made a list of seventy things that you know for
Speaker 1: my dad's seventieth birthday, seventy things that we love about E. J. Glaser,
Speaker 1: And one of them was like, you've cultivated a love
Speaker 1: of the outdoors in your entire family, And then in
Speaker 1: parentheses it says, except well except maybe Nikki and I
Speaker 1: just felt like othered, you're weird, You're different, like it
Speaker 1: just you just put it in.
Speaker 2: I think it all stems from that stuff, because because like.
Speaker 3: What, like no one else feels this way about me.
Speaker 2: Like to have a deficiency, to feel deficient because you
Speaker 2: don't like decorating houses like one of your friends. Every
Speaker 2: time one of your friends does something that feels interesting
Speaker 2: or even like feminine to you, you're like, why am
Speaker 2: I not like that?
Speaker 1: Yeah? Yeah, I go right to that.
Speaker 2: It's never like oh cool Sara Lene is into like
Speaker 2: you know, old records or like you know, French music
Speaker 2: from the nineteen seventies.
Speaker 3: No, I am like, why can't I be into that?
Speaker 6: Right?
Speaker 1: Because it seems like the thing that is most desirable
Speaker 1: about a woman is someone who's like fun. Like you
Speaker 1: even asked a question the other day of like I
Speaker 1: forget what it was. It was about like who of
Speaker 1: your friends would you recommend for this thing? And we
Speaker 1: all Kirsten met me, and you all unequivalently were like,
Speaker 1: oh Kirsten because she's the most fun. And I was
Speaker 1: just like, god, like why I would like to be
Speaker 1: the answer to that, but I'm not because I'm not fun,
Speaker 1: Like why can't I be fun? And like then I
Speaker 1: forced myself to be fun, and I go, you know what,
Speaker 1: I will go get on that roller coaster, you know,
Speaker 1: like when the other night we were at this the music,
Speaker 1: this amazing thing called Prater in Vienna, which is an
Speaker 1: open air theme park like six Flags that you don't
Speaker 1: even buy a ticket, you'll buy a.
Speaker 2: Ticket to get it, and you just buy a ticket
Speaker 2: for an individual.
Speaker 1: Run and it feels it felt so Austrian. There was
Speaker 1: hardly any tourist there. It was like mostly local Austrians
Speaker 1: just going out having a great time. And you go
Speaker 1: to this like cool old school carnival kind of with
Speaker 1: all these like updated cool rides, and Chris and Matt
Speaker 1: were going on the bungee thing and that like insane
Speaker 1: insane rides man, Like I can't even describe what they were.
Speaker 1: One was like it pulls you down like a slingshot
Speaker 1: and then it slings you into the air probably two
Speaker 1: hundred feet one hundred and fifty feet, I.
Speaker 2: Don't really know, something like that.
Speaker 3: And then another.
Speaker 1: One was like it's a long poll and on each
Speaker 1: end there's like a twirling thing with eight Yeah.
Speaker 5: I saw the videos you posted on Instagram of these rides.
Speaker 5: They looked I would now I wouldn't even look at
Speaker 5: those rides there. They would make me vomit if I.
Speaker 1: Saw the same life.
Speaker 2: Thank you say, what are you disgusted with yourself because
Speaker 2: you don't want to be a part of those rides?
Speaker 5: Brian, No, no, I am. I'm just generally disgusted overall
Speaker 5: by the concept. I don't understand I guess I can.
Speaker 5: I don't understand why anyone want to put themselves through that.
Speaker 1: I don't understand you don't feel disconnected to people who
Speaker 1: do and like feel like, man, I wish I was
Speaker 1: more adventurous, Like it seems like a cool thing to
Speaker 1: want to go on those rides, Like that would be
Speaker 1: a cool person that does someone who doesn't do it.
Speaker 2: But I think you're putting all You're like labeling everything
Speaker 2: is like good or bad. You do a lot of this,
Speaker 2: like it's either good or bad, it's cool or uncool
Speaker 2: or this or that. Like somebody's just like, oh, I
Speaker 2: just like going fast or I like going upside down,
Speaker 2: and you not going upside down doesn't make you uncool,
Speaker 2: it just.
Speaker 3: Makes if not like any people.
Speaker 1: We all agree the X Games are cool, Like that's cool,
Speaker 1: Tony Hawk is cool.
Speaker 3: Someone who's like.
Speaker 1: I am scared to go fast is literally a door
Speaker 1: that is like a door.
Speaker 2: Wasn't It's not scared, you don't want to you're not
Speaker 2: interested in it.
Speaker 1: Yeah, honestly they get scared.
Speaker 6: I think, like if you're putting up Tony Hawk or whatever,
Speaker 6: that's more his personality. But people to me who go
Speaker 6: on these crazy rides and skydiving and all that, like
Speaker 6: I don't think very highly of them.
Speaker 3: That's so interesting.
Speaker 1: I felt so alone because we were at this restaurant
Speaker 1: and we were overlooking this theme park and Chris and
Speaker 1: Matt are talking about which ones they wanted to go on,
Speaker 1: and I was just like, what's wrong with me that
Speaker 1: I don't want to go on these? Like I wish
Speaker 1: I was a cool girl that wanted to do it.
Speaker 1: No one was making me feel that way. I was
Speaker 1: choosing on my own. And then I decided to go
Speaker 1: on Instagram and post a poll of like who would
Speaker 1: go on this ride and who wouldn't and who would
Speaker 1: say maybe to this? And I made it very clear
Speaker 1: like that's why I put it maybe because I thought
Speaker 1: some people might be on the fence and I don't
Speaker 1: want them to say yes if they really wouldn't, and like,
Speaker 1: you know, smart, And I got back that not only
Speaker 1: am I in the majority, I am in the vast majority.
Speaker 1: I thought it would be the other way around. I
Speaker 1: thought I was going to be in the fifteen percent
Speaker 1: of people who wouldn't do this. I was in the
Speaker 1: seventy four to seventy six percent of people who would
Speaker 1: never do be dose.
Speaker 5: That's not exactly an accurate poll because the focus group
Speaker 5: was your fans that well that I don't know.
Speaker 1: I feel like I have a wide birth of fans
Speaker 1: that like different. I feel like, actually my fans are
Speaker 1: like a wide arrange. I'm like, I don't know if.
Speaker 5: You did the same poll to the followers of I
Speaker 5: don't know, like I.
Speaker 1: Can feel good about myself.
Speaker 5: I'm trying to put you back down, Nicky about the
Speaker 5: point down.
Speaker 1: I don't want to go up and down.
Speaker 5: I want to stay on them spinning in a circle.
Speaker 5: What about spinning a big circle?
Speaker 1: You know, we were debating at dinner whether to go
Speaker 1: this theme park or whether to go I was maybe
Speaker 1: thinking of going back to the Tailor Swift sing along
Speaker 1: and actually dressing in my Tailor Swift outfit for it
Speaker 1: and making some videos, and Chris later on was like, oh,
Speaker 1: I'm sorry. We went to the theme park. We should
Speaker 1: have gone back and done your tailor swift thing. And
Speaker 1: I was like, I will say I wanted to. I
Speaker 1: like watching people go on these things and doing them,
Speaker 1: and I want to hear about it. It's like the
Speaker 1: same way that I bought Matt a muffin the other
Speaker 1: day that I really wanted, but I just couldn't bring
Speaker 1: myself to eat it. And I was like, can I just.
Speaker 2: Why that was a pasta muffin?
Speaker 1: Even pasta? Like, I just want to watch people eat
Speaker 1: things that I wish.
Speaker 5: I know, it's fun to watch, it's fun to like
Speaker 5: did I never ride any rides? If I go to
Speaker 5: Disney World, I don't ride any It's all I do
Speaker 5: is I get that turkey leg and I and I
Speaker 5: eat the turkey leg. And that's my experience at disney World.
Speaker 5: And everybody else likes to go up like Ali loves rides,
Speaker 5: she loves all that shit, and I don't like any
Speaker 5: of it. But right, I don't know. I mean, it's uh.
Speaker 6: Yeah, ivies, I don't Yeah, maybe that's how it is.
Speaker 5: And every time I try to do something like that,
Speaker 5: I get sick.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean, okay, well I don't get sick, but
Speaker 1: I did, so I tried to be cool, and I
Speaker 1: was like, you know, not even try to be cool.
Speaker 1: I was like, you know what, you actually are in
Speaker 1: such a bad mood. Maybe a little bit of G
Speaker 1: forces would lift you out of this and just like
Speaker 1: kind of shake you up.
Speaker 2: G Force should be the name of your next special.
Speaker 5: Wow.
Speaker 1: And so we got on this roller coaster that was
Speaker 1: honestly one that I could handle like it was Loop
Speaker 1: D Loop.
Speaker 3: I felt like so fine about it. I wish I
Speaker 3: would have done.
Speaker 1: It, because afterwards I did get in it, I sat
Speaker 1: down and then I go nope, because I saw the
Speaker 1: Carnie running it and smoking a cigarette and just seem
Speaker 1: to like blackadaisical, and I just go, nope, I'm going
Speaker 1: to lose my entire family and all my loved ones.
Speaker 2: On this ride.
Speaker 1: Then I think it's going to kill them. But I'm
Speaker 1: not gonna die on this. So I got off the thing.
Speaker 1: Later on, Chris and Lauren and Matt all said that
Speaker 1: was horrifying, like that was really tough, And now I
Speaker 1: wish I would have done it, so I could have
Speaker 1: been because I do think I could have handled it.
Speaker 4: HM.
Speaker 5: Lauren was shook, was shook after why why having done it?
Speaker 5: What is it really that much fun that it's worth
Speaker 5: risking your life?
Speaker 3: I don't it's not risking your life.
Speaker 1: I mean, I know what the chances are of dying
Speaker 1: on a roller coaster, and it's slim to fucking none.
Speaker 1: It's risking your life walking up to the roller coaster
Speaker 1: and maybe twisting your ankle in a way that would
Speaker 1: land you in the hospital, and then you get sepsis
Speaker 1: because you're in the hospital.
Speaker 3: That's for rest final thought.
Speaker 1: So I made a list of all the things that
Speaker 1: I because Annya was like, I really want to know,
Speaker 1: like what you wish you liked, and I just want
Speaker 1: to read my list. And then Taylor and Curson also
Speaker 1: made lists of things that they don't like. Theirs are
Speaker 1: different because they don't care that they're like this, They
Speaker 1: just don't like them. And it made me feel less alone.
Speaker 1: I thought maybe some of the listeners who felt the
Speaker 1: way I feel might feel less alone if they find
Speaker 1: out that other people also don't like these things, Because
Speaker 1: I will say one of the only people that makes
Speaker 1: me feel so good about myself is Larry David because
Speaker 1: he's made a career on not liking people or things
Speaker 1: or activities, and it's like one of the most lovable,
Speaker 1: amazing things about him.
Speaker 2: But the thing that makes him lovable is he's like
Speaker 2: completely accepted it, in owning it. The problem is you
Speaker 2: feel great shame, yes, about all of it, and I
Speaker 2: blame you, great shame my dad.
Speaker 1: But I love my dad and it's one of the
Speaker 1: seventy reasons I do love him is because he is
Speaker 1: I love. He loves what he loves and if you
Speaker 1: don't love it, he's completely perplexed by it and will
Speaker 1: make you feel a little bit about it. No, he's amazing.
Speaker 1: My Dad's like the fucking best. I love him so much.
Speaker 1: He's going to the Emmy's with us, and he's texting
Speaker 1: me about it right now. Okay, So things I wish
Speaker 1: I liked harvesting high dranges, clothes and good soft linens,
Speaker 1: organizing things, cooking, hiking, seeing sites, long showers, decaded body treatments, smells,
Speaker 1: sense decor, baking, tracking my cycles, knowing when foods disagree
Speaker 1: with me, getting excited by cute dogs, talking to strangers,
Speaker 1: having good aesthetic taste, having a simple skincare grooming routine,
Speaker 1: being scared and aware of toxins and things. Knowing when
Speaker 1: things are too rich or too sweet. Can I just
Speaker 1: say any girl that's like I can't eat that's too
Speaker 1: rich or like too sweet? Like fuck you girl? Like
Speaker 1: how do you know your body so well? How are
Speaker 1: you so in tune? Being someone who eats and then
Speaker 1: says I'm full, I can't eat anymore? Oohing and aweing
Speaker 1: about wallpaper or a baby, keeping a refrigerator, clean flowers, gardening,
Speaker 1: doing things, adventures, going to the beach, sitting by a pool,
Speaker 1: swimming in a pool, talking to people on planes, the Olympics, tennis, golf, yoga,
Speaker 1: playing with kids, Sipping a small coffee When I see
Speaker 1: someone sipping a small coffee when you could afford to
Speaker 1: get a bigger one, I don't understand you. I don't
Speaker 1: get you. And whenever I, whenever the off chance comes
Speaker 1: that I do get a small coffee because I'm around
Speaker 1: people who are also getting coffees, and I don't want
Speaker 1: to seem like a crazy binge eater with my big
Speaker 1: trough of VENTI latte, I will get like a small coffee.
Speaker 1: I feel like Kate Middleton when I get one, I
Speaker 1: am like I am a princess. I feel so elevated,
Speaker 1: like I don't know why I don't do it more
Speaker 1: because it makes me feel amazing, But it's also I
Speaker 1: feel depressed because I want more good taste and fine jewelry.
Speaker 1: I literally can't tell the difference between a Forever twenty
Speaker 1: one necklace or a Cardier one. Matching socks, camping, washing
Speaker 1: my feet, pedicures and manicures. Okay, and then this is
Speaker 1: tailor's Tailor is so funny and such a good writer,
Speaker 1: and you will see it in just a second. Okay.
Speaker 1: She was like things I hate. Long relaxing showers, unwinding
Speaker 1: in a hot tub, dainty doilies, perfect bamboo cutlery, cooling
Speaker 1: sweet linens, creating a joyful bouquet well deserved, splurging on
Speaker 1: a simply perfect pair of heels, baking a fill the
Speaker 1: room and fill your heart crusty warm pie, snuggling up
Speaker 1: with your rider die and chatting on the couch with
Speaker 1: some tea gay tea when the gaber reesers do a
Speaker 1: little swirly on the top of your gay coffee. Jesus Christ.
Speaker 1: People who gently wish you affirm their gender even though
Speaker 1: you don't even know them. People who talk to you
Speaker 1: ever small talk on the straws. By the way, Taylor
Speaker 1: dated someone non binary and is so respectful of their
Speaker 1: pronouns and more than anyone I've ever met in my life,
Speaker 1: So don't come at her. People who talk to you
Speaker 1: ever small talk on pampering put a pamper on it,
Speaker 1: shitty ass. I don't know what that means. A beautiful,
Speaker 1: embossed diary full of life's little treasured secrets, whispered secrets,
Speaker 1: a child's laughter, a child's anything, handmade soap and delicious smells, perfume,
Speaker 1: or anything that smells like anything being feminine.
Speaker 3: Cozy fall walks.
Speaker 1: This is just exercise. You can't trick me a vigorous
Speaker 1: and blood pumping hike through some hellscape. No thanks, savoring
Speaker 1: a pumpkin spice latte, pumpkin spice fuck. And then Kirsten
Speaker 1: made a list of her things, well, Taylor's.
Speaker 5: Taylor's got a theme there. She kind of hates like
Speaker 5: mommy bloggers, she influenced women influencers. Those are those are
Speaker 5: like titles of blogs from the like Autumn Harvest cooking.
Speaker 2: Yes, And there's a distinction between hating stuff and why
Speaker 2: am I not like other people?
Speaker 1: Like that she does not want to be those things.
Speaker 1: I want to be almost all of those.
Speaker 5: This is the first ten minutes of one of George
Speaker 5: Carlin's specials People. I could do without that when he
Speaker 5: talked to the list for like twenty minutes.
Speaker 1: And then I liked Kirsten's list, And because Kirsten is
Speaker 1: I think, the most balanced, fun, adventurous person I know,
Speaker 1: and she has a list of things she doesn't even
Speaker 1: like things that she things I hate that people like
Speaker 1: card games, bowling acts, throwing or escape rooms, brewery tours,
Speaker 1: tie dice shirts, swing, growing and harvesting vegetables, races or
Speaker 1: five K most museums, vision boards, most crafts, antique shopping,
Speaker 1: Thriftspping these lists made me feel so good.
Speaker 2: I think people I want to be too many You
Speaker 2: just want to be too many things.
Speaker 3: What I just need is just.
Speaker 1: More your disposure to things that other people I just
Speaker 1: want to feel like other people. I'm not alone. That
Speaker 1: poll I did made me feel so good. I needed
Speaker 1: to know I'm not alone.
Speaker 2: I can't imagine a world, living in a world where
Speaker 2: anything was available to me to love and wanting to do,
Speaker 2: wanting to want to do all of those things I
Speaker 2: know you, well, it's too much.
Speaker 5: You've got to join us, Nikki, You've got to join
Speaker 5: us and enjoying.
Speaker 1: Okay, hating things okay, okay.
Speaker 5: Can't you join the team on that one?
Speaker 1: I will say my Imposter Syndrome book is really hitting
Speaker 1: at the root of all of this, which is like
Speaker 1: you feel alone.
Speaker 3: Like if I feel alone, that's when I feel shame.
Speaker 1: Is like, because I was the only one in my
Speaker 1: family who didn't like these things, I wasn't exposed to
Speaker 1: other people who didn't like these things. And now that
Speaker 1: I'm getting more exposure to, like, oh, I Larry David
Speaker 1: is very popular and he's a comergion curmudgeon about all
Speaker 1: this stuff, it makes me feel like maybe it's okay
Speaker 1: for me to be that. Like you need to know
Speaker 1: that you're not alone. And this book that I'm reading
Speaker 1: about imposter syndrome, they're like, the first thing we want
Speaker 1: to let you know is everyone has this.
Speaker 3: You are not special.
Speaker 1: Everyone seventy percent of people suffer with imposter syndrome. And
Speaker 1: then it's so funny because I posted about the book
Speaker 1: on my Instagram, and my one of my pilates private
Speaker 1: teachers who got me to the place where I can
Speaker 1: go to private classes.
Speaker 5: Now.
Speaker 3: She wrote to me and said, currently reading this and I'm.
Speaker 1: Like you, you who I look at as like the Queen
Speaker 1: of Pilates knows everything about body mechanics, perfect looking, like
Speaker 1: perfect style, Like you have to read this book. Okay,
Speaker 1: maybe it's okay, Maybe I have acceptance around. Maybe accepting
Speaker 1: the fact that I have this thing that other people
Speaker 1: suffer with is gonna make me release it a little
Speaker 1: bit more. And I think that's really the key, is
Speaker 1: like I just need to know I'm not alone. And
Speaker 1: I think that's when I start to feel like girls.
Speaker 1: That is like everyone wants a baby and I don't.
Speaker 1: I go what's wrong with me? Like I just I
Speaker 1: need to have a more plexic group of people. I
Speaker 1: need to expose myself to more. I actually need to
Speaker 1: talk to more stranger.
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's exactly what you need. Your first instinct is
Speaker 2: always what's wrong with me? If I'm not like that?
Speaker 3: Which is the title of my new.
Speaker 1: Song and Special and Special and book, the motto of
Speaker 1: my y en book, like I literally wrote it down yesterday.
Speaker 2: Podcast coming to Patreon.
Speaker 1: Ye did you see a.
Speaker 3: Clip of What's Wrong?
Speaker 1: What's wrong with Thing? Do you see the the post
Speaker 1: of Kamala where she realizes what her, Yes, what her?
Speaker 3: What's the catchphrase.
Speaker 2: Is gonna be They're weird or whatever.
Speaker 3: We will not go back.
Speaker 5: It's wonderful.
Speaker 1: And then all of a sudden, she like they they
Speaker 1: the crowd like really lights up and she kind of
Speaker 1: looks around and then she's like, we will not go back,
Speaker 1: and she kind of like says it again and then
Speaker 1: they start chanting it, and it's like it's not even
Speaker 1: like a cringe moment. It's like a beautiful moment where
Speaker 1: she's like she finds it's like a scene from Veep.
Speaker 1: It's amazing.
Speaker 2: It's like like a lightning bolt struck her, like from
Speaker 2: a cartoon. Yeah.
Speaker 1: People were actually comparing it to that You're so smart. Yeah,
Speaker 1: like people like found a clip and viep that is
Speaker 1: like identify, wish you.
Speaker 2: Were smart too. Why can't you be smart?
Speaker 1: But that's what I did in therapy yesterday where she
Speaker 1: was like where I go, Honestly, my whole thing is
Speaker 1: like what's wrong with me? And she was like this
Speaker 1: this constant question of what's wrong with me? And I
Speaker 1: was like, I wrote it down. I'm like, that's a
Speaker 1: really good special. That's a good that's a good direction
Speaker 1: to go in. Yeah for the next spash, so get excited.
Speaker 1: I will not go back. We will not go to
Speaker 1: that pilates class teacher because it was hard. All right, guys,
Speaker 1: thank you for listening to the show this week. I
Speaker 1: am on tour this weekend Springfield, Cape Girardo. That's Missouri
Speaker 1: for you, folks. Come out to those shows. They are
Speaker 1: going to be so much fun. I'm driving to them
Speaker 1: in my new car that doesn't keep a charge, but
Speaker 1: it's going. It's going to pretty soon. Chris Conny, thank
Speaker 1: you for being here for shows this week. Brian No,
Speaker 1: I love you. And it sounds like, yeah, no, what
Speaker 1: the Emmys are next next week two weeks from now.
Speaker 3: Yeah, we'll talk about those.
Speaker 1: They're coming up Creative Arts Emmies where I'm nominated and
Speaker 1: I am presenting. Spoiler alert. It will be so fun
Speaker 1: and uh we'll talk to you next week about all
Speaker 1: of that. So much more to come.
Speaker 3: Thank you for listening. Don't be cut bye.
Speaker 1: The Nicki Glazer Podcast is a production by Will Ferrell's
Speaker 1: Big Money Players and iHeart Podcasts, created and hosted by
Speaker 1: me Nicki Glazer co hosted by Brian Frangie, executive produced
Speaker 1: by Will Ferrell, Hans Sonny and Noah Avior. Edited it
Speaker 1: engineered by Lean and Loaf, video production Mark Canton, and
Speaker 1: music by Anya Marina. You can now watch full episodes
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Speaker 1: Glazer Pod and subscribe to our channel