1 00:00:00,080 --> 00:00:02,160 Speaker 1: This is Kelly Henderson and you're listening to the Velvet 2 00:00:02,240 --> 00:00:06,279 Speaker 1: Edge podcast. This week, my guest is my friend Caroline Hobby. 3 00:00:06,320 --> 00:00:08,760 Speaker 1: Caroline is both warm and kind, but she is also 4 00:00:09,039 --> 00:00:11,280 Speaker 1: very real. We sat down to talk about why she 5 00:00:11,320 --> 00:00:13,560 Speaker 1: started living her life from the truth and how that's 6 00:00:13,680 --> 00:00:16,840 Speaker 1: changed everything. She also tells me how she found love 7 00:00:16,880 --> 00:00:19,799 Speaker 1: after years of being terrible at dating, and how their 8 00:00:19,840 --> 00:00:23,200 Speaker 1: love has now expanded into a family. We're both currently 9 00:00:23,360 --> 00:00:27,720 Speaker 1: extremely tired and hormonal, so this conversation brought lots of 10 00:00:27,880 --> 00:00:31,400 Speaker 1: raw emotion and even some tears. However, it also brought 11 00:00:31,440 --> 00:00:34,400 Speaker 1: many insights into what we are both truly wanting to 12 00:00:34,440 --> 00:00:36,840 Speaker 1: bring into this world and how each of our podcast 13 00:00:36,840 --> 00:00:40,599 Speaker 1: conversations are helping us to do it. Here's Caroline. Okay, 14 00:00:40,760 --> 00:00:42,480 Speaker 1: so I told you before, but I want to talk 15 00:00:42,479 --> 00:00:45,360 Speaker 1: about why you came to Nashville. I came to Nashville 16 00:00:45,360 --> 00:00:47,360 Speaker 1: to be a country and Western singers. That what you 17 00:00:47,400 --> 00:00:50,840 Speaker 1: wanted to do forever? Well kind of yes, I wanted 18 00:00:50,920 --> 00:00:53,880 Speaker 1: to be in entertainment. I grew up in Waco, Texas, 19 00:00:54,000 --> 00:00:56,640 Speaker 1: and I wanted to I mean I would have done 20 00:00:56,640 --> 00:01:00,200 Speaker 1: anything like acting, modeling, singing. Too short to model, did 21 00:01:00,200 --> 00:01:02,600 Speaker 1: get a Model Church America. When I was in I 22 00:01:02,640 --> 00:01:06,479 Speaker 1: forgot about model search in America. Yes, of course, well 23 00:01:06,480 --> 00:01:08,839 Speaker 1: you're pretty enough to model. I mean I just wanted 24 00:01:08,880 --> 00:01:11,600 Speaker 1: to get into the entertainment industry whatever it was. Yes, 25 00:01:11,760 --> 00:01:14,560 Speaker 1: And so when I was in junior high in high school, 26 00:01:14,640 --> 00:01:17,000 Speaker 1: no junior high, I went to Model Schurch America. Didn't 27 00:01:17,000 --> 00:01:20,959 Speaker 1: pan out. Dang it? Did they say you're too short? 28 00:01:21,160 --> 00:01:23,399 Speaker 1: I think so? I mean I never really made it 29 00:01:23,400 --> 00:01:26,720 Speaker 1: past like the open casting call. So you're like, okay, 30 00:01:26,760 --> 00:01:29,680 Speaker 1: what's my second option? Second option? Then I would sing 31 00:01:29,680 --> 00:01:33,040 Speaker 1: in church. I was inquired, and I always had like 32 00:01:33,040 --> 00:01:36,600 Speaker 1: a good, solid, strong voice, not like Carrie Underwood or anything, 33 00:01:36,640 --> 00:01:38,840 Speaker 1: but like, you know, it does really right. I mean 34 00:01:38,880 --> 00:01:41,520 Speaker 1: that's like another level of voice. I was like, we 35 00:01:41,520 --> 00:01:43,800 Speaker 1: can make this work, we can do this. So I 36 00:01:43,880 --> 00:01:47,319 Speaker 1: worked on it, took singing lessons, tried to take guitar lessons, 37 00:01:47,440 --> 00:01:50,160 Speaker 1: never learned guitar. Although I took guitar lessons since I 38 00:01:50,200 --> 00:01:53,240 Speaker 1: was in a junior in high school, and I never 39 00:01:53,320 --> 00:01:54,920 Speaker 1: learned how to play guitar. What was it? It just 40 00:01:55,000 --> 00:01:57,240 Speaker 1: once was in right and just didn't Yeah, I just 41 00:01:58,160 --> 00:01:59,600 Speaker 1: I don't know what it was. And then I tried 42 00:01:59,600 --> 00:02:02,480 Speaker 1: to learn. My Madelyn learned it terribly, could like kind 43 00:02:02,520 --> 00:02:05,640 Speaker 1: of beat around on a mandolin a little bit um. 44 00:02:05,680 --> 00:02:07,400 Speaker 1: But yeah, So I moved to Nashville. I was like, 45 00:02:07,400 --> 00:02:09,360 Speaker 1: I'm gonna sing because then I got into show choir 46 00:02:09,400 --> 00:02:11,440 Speaker 1: and choir and started performing in high school and I 47 00:02:11,480 --> 00:02:14,920 Speaker 1: really loved performing and singing, and so I was like, 48 00:02:14,960 --> 00:02:17,440 Speaker 1: I'm going to Nashville. So that was the plan. When 49 00:02:17,440 --> 00:02:20,960 Speaker 1: you came here. Did you immediately get set up with 50 00:02:21,040 --> 00:02:23,800 Speaker 1: stealing angels or was it like? Okay? So what happened? 51 00:02:23,840 --> 00:02:26,840 Speaker 1: So I went to college at Belmont, So that's how 52 00:02:26,840 --> 00:02:29,120 Speaker 1: I got My parents were like, Okay, go to Nashville, 53 00:02:29,160 --> 00:02:31,600 Speaker 1: but like, go to college. Still have to go to school. Yeah, 54 00:02:31,919 --> 00:02:34,800 Speaker 1: So I went to college major in music business in English, 55 00:02:35,200 --> 00:02:38,320 Speaker 1: and I started interning all over music. Row started interning 56 00:02:38,360 --> 00:02:41,520 Speaker 1: for Victoria Shaw, who's a hit song. She wrote the 57 00:02:41,600 --> 00:02:45,239 Speaker 1: River for Garth Brooks and Uh, Nobody Wants to Be 58 00:02:45,360 --> 00:02:48,680 Speaker 1: Lonely for Christina Aguilera and Ricky Martin, and she wrote 59 00:02:48,800 --> 00:02:50,760 Speaker 1: some other stuff for Garth Brooks. So she got me 60 00:02:50,919 --> 00:02:54,840 Speaker 1: involved with the songwriting community. I started writing songs and 61 00:02:54,880 --> 00:02:59,280 Speaker 1: then randomly um Jennifer Wayne who's now in Runaway June 62 00:03:00,200 --> 00:03:03,320 Speaker 1: Uh moved to Nashville and she moved into house that 63 00:03:03,360 --> 00:03:06,080 Speaker 1: she fought on Craigslist, and she moved with one of 64 00:03:06,080 --> 00:03:08,440 Speaker 1: my best friends. So I met Jen like the first 65 00:03:08,520 --> 00:03:11,160 Speaker 1: day she moved here, and she moved here to do music, 66 00:03:11,200 --> 00:03:13,560 Speaker 1: and I was pursuing music, and we both were like 67 00:03:13,800 --> 00:03:15,320 Speaker 1: kind of nervous to be doing it on our owns. 68 00:03:15,360 --> 00:03:17,880 Speaker 1: Were like, let's form a duo. So we formed a duo. 69 00:03:18,080 --> 00:03:21,679 Speaker 1: We started singing around and then she was John is 70 00:03:21,760 --> 00:03:24,640 Speaker 1: John Wayne's granddaughter, so she was hooked up with like CIA, 71 00:03:24,760 --> 00:03:27,840 Speaker 1: a big agency, and we kind of got this reality 72 00:03:27,880 --> 00:03:30,480 Speaker 1: show going where we're gonna do a reality show based 73 00:03:30,520 --> 00:03:32,720 Speaker 1: on our heritage because I'm distantly related to Daniel ban 74 00:03:32,840 --> 00:03:34,400 Speaker 1: I was going to ask you, what's the connection with 75 00:03:34,480 --> 00:03:39,520 Speaker 1: Daniel Boone. Yeah, we dug it up because then we 76 00:03:39,600 --> 00:03:41,600 Speaker 1: had They were like, this is a great idea, but 77 00:03:41,640 --> 00:03:43,200 Speaker 1: you need it to be a little stronger. Can you 78 00:03:43,200 --> 00:03:47,040 Speaker 1: find another legacy and child. So we found Taylor Lynn, 79 00:03:47,040 --> 00:03:50,440 Speaker 1: who's Loretta Lyn's granddaughter, and so then we had Lorett 80 00:03:50,480 --> 00:03:53,320 Speaker 1: Len's granddaughter, John Wayne's granddaughter and the descendant of Daniel 81 00:03:53,320 --> 00:03:58,680 Speaker 1: Boone descended. It was really Daniel Boone everyone's related to 82 00:03:58,760 --> 00:04:03,440 Speaker 1: day things. So he's like a fore father, isn't he? Basically? 83 00:04:06,360 --> 00:04:09,440 Speaker 1: But it was a stretch, But did the show happen? 84 00:04:09,720 --> 00:04:12,160 Speaker 1: We almost made it. We got like to the final 85 00:04:12,200 --> 00:04:15,920 Speaker 1: stages and on TLC, and then it just never panned out. 86 00:04:16,480 --> 00:04:18,440 Speaker 1: But then after the show didn't pan out, we're like, 87 00:04:18,520 --> 00:04:21,040 Speaker 1: you know what, We're gonna stay a trio because we 88 00:04:21,040 --> 00:04:24,200 Speaker 1: were so much stronger together. And then we became a 89 00:04:24,240 --> 00:04:26,920 Speaker 1: trio and then the show went away, obviously, but we 90 00:04:27,000 --> 00:04:30,840 Speaker 1: stayed stealing angels and that's how we created our little 91 00:04:30,880 --> 00:04:32,800 Speaker 1: music group. So were you guys on the road? Like 92 00:04:32,839 --> 00:04:35,560 Speaker 1: y'all had a record deal? Right? Paul Worley, who produced 93 00:04:35,560 --> 00:04:37,600 Speaker 1: the Dixie Chicks, started a record label for us, and 94 00:04:37,640 --> 00:04:40,760 Speaker 1: we ended up partnering Sony and we were on the 95 00:04:40,839 --> 00:04:44,440 Speaker 1: road NonStop, like on a radio tour constantly, and we 96 00:04:44,640 --> 00:04:47,479 Speaker 1: just we're touring in a tour bus. We went to Iraq, 97 00:04:47,640 --> 00:04:51,520 Speaker 1: we did a U s O tour. Um it was awesome, 98 00:04:51,560 --> 00:04:54,719 Speaker 1: full deal, full deal. So fone, we had three singles 99 00:04:54,920 --> 00:04:57,240 Speaker 1: on the radio too, made it to like one was 100 00:04:57,279 --> 00:05:00,200 Speaker 1: like forty eight, which is not great, but we the 101 00:05:00,240 --> 00:05:04,240 Speaker 1: top fifty and then it just started falling apart, Like 102 00:05:04,279 --> 00:05:07,320 Speaker 1: what happened Taylor? We're on our third single. It wasn't 103 00:05:07,320 --> 00:05:10,400 Speaker 1: doing well. Um, we had a private investor because we 104 00:05:10,400 --> 00:05:13,600 Speaker 1: were half independent half with Sony, Like Sony was our distribution, 105 00:05:13,760 --> 00:05:18,599 Speaker 1: but like our main label was independently backed by this guy. 106 00:05:18,800 --> 00:05:22,360 Speaker 1: And so we were on our third single, wasn't doing well. 107 00:05:23,400 --> 00:05:25,080 Speaker 1: Kind of he was kind of getting tired of pumping 108 00:05:25,120 --> 00:05:26,880 Speaker 1: in money. You know, you kind of get to that 109 00:05:26,880 --> 00:05:28,680 Speaker 1: point where it's like, Okay, is this gonna work or not? 110 00:05:29,200 --> 00:05:32,000 Speaker 1: Like you had to figure that out. And then so 111 00:05:32,120 --> 00:05:35,760 Speaker 1: and then Taylor ended up getting pregnant and her fiance 112 00:05:36,240 --> 00:05:39,520 Speaker 1: lived in Seattle, so she like moved to Seattle. Kind 113 00:05:39,520 --> 00:05:42,240 Speaker 1: of just like it just saw all started crumbling all 114 00:05:42,320 --> 00:05:44,080 Speaker 1: the same time, all the same time. So then the 115 00:05:44,080 --> 00:05:46,960 Speaker 1: investor kind of pulled out, Taylor left for Seattle, and 116 00:05:46,960 --> 00:05:49,000 Speaker 1: then literally from one day the next, it was just over. 117 00:05:49,200 --> 00:05:51,720 Speaker 1: It was crazy. We had devoted seven years of our 118 00:05:51,720 --> 00:05:53,760 Speaker 1: live to this band and then it was just done. 119 00:05:54,240 --> 00:05:55,680 Speaker 1: And Jen and I were like, what are we going 120 00:05:55,760 --> 00:05:58,760 Speaker 1: to do? Like this was our whole plan. We were 121 00:05:58,760 --> 00:06:00,599 Speaker 1: both in our like twenties at that point, and we 122 00:06:00,640 --> 00:06:03,400 Speaker 1: had put all of our eggs in this basket. We're 123 00:06:03,400 --> 00:06:07,120 Speaker 1: like we're going like I entered into like a panic depression. 124 00:06:07,839 --> 00:06:10,239 Speaker 1: It's like my life is over. Isn't that so interesting? 125 00:06:10,279 --> 00:06:11,400 Speaker 1: I mean, I feel like I've taught to a lot 126 00:06:11,400 --> 00:06:14,120 Speaker 1: of people in Nashville, and what obviously we know of 127 00:06:14,160 --> 00:06:17,799 Speaker 1: all successful people is the successful part. But I've heard 128 00:06:17,920 --> 00:06:20,680 Speaker 1: every single person's story, and there's a story like this, 129 00:06:20,839 --> 00:06:25,039 Speaker 1: like you literally just think that you're done. So like, 130 00:06:25,080 --> 00:06:29,479 Speaker 1: what did y'all do? I moved to Austin, Okay, I 131 00:06:29,600 --> 00:06:32,359 Speaker 1: literally closer to home for you to home. I like 132 00:06:32,440 --> 00:06:35,599 Speaker 1: had a breakdown. I was cannot be in Nashville anymore. 133 00:06:35,960 --> 00:06:37,600 Speaker 1: I ended up breaking up with my boyfriend of four 134 00:06:37,640 --> 00:06:40,039 Speaker 1: years who was not my husband, Michael. Oh you guys, 135 00:06:40,560 --> 00:06:43,320 Speaker 1: we'll get to that later, Okay, Oh my gosh, we 136 00:06:43,400 --> 00:06:45,560 Speaker 1: broke up. I just like I had to get out. 137 00:06:45,720 --> 00:06:48,280 Speaker 1: I just the walls were closing it on me. The 138 00:06:48,360 --> 00:06:51,200 Speaker 1: Nashville is like I cannot be here anymore. I can't breathe. 139 00:06:51,279 --> 00:06:52,880 Speaker 1: I don't know what to do. I've got to just 140 00:06:53,080 --> 00:06:56,440 Speaker 1: reset my life because truly, I had thought for my 141 00:06:56,480 --> 00:06:58,520 Speaker 1: whole twenties that this is what I was gonna do. 142 00:06:58,640 --> 00:07:00,520 Speaker 1: I've gotten hooked up with Taylor moved here when I 143 00:07:00,520 --> 00:07:02,440 Speaker 1: was nineteen to be a singer. I got hooked up 144 00:07:02,440 --> 00:07:05,240 Speaker 1: with Haylan and Jen. I was like four, and now 145 00:07:05,279 --> 00:07:10,040 Speaker 1: here I am at like twenty nine, and it's all crumbling. 146 00:07:10,360 --> 00:07:13,240 Speaker 1: Why did you feel like you couldn't rebuild here in Nashville. 147 00:07:13,400 --> 00:07:16,280 Speaker 1: I just didn't know where to start, and I thought like, Okay, 148 00:07:16,320 --> 00:07:19,000 Speaker 1: my shot is done, Like this was my one shot 149 00:07:19,040 --> 00:07:21,800 Speaker 1: with music, and I just didn't know how to even 150 00:07:21,840 --> 00:07:23,920 Speaker 1: pick up again because we weren't gonna be a trio anymore. 151 00:07:24,400 --> 00:07:26,720 Speaker 1: I didn't want to be a solo act. I didn't 152 00:07:26,720 --> 00:07:29,000 Speaker 1: want to be a songwriter, just a songwriter. So like 153 00:07:29,080 --> 00:07:31,400 Speaker 1: everything that I was putting in it was just this band. 154 00:07:31,800 --> 00:07:34,840 Speaker 1: And now that the band was done, I like Jen 155 00:07:34,960 --> 00:07:37,000 Speaker 1: and I tried to get like another member and were 156 00:07:37,040 --> 00:07:40,160 Speaker 1: like auditioned people and it just didn't work. And then 157 00:07:40,240 --> 00:07:42,400 Speaker 1: like we didn't know who was going to sing lead 158 00:07:42,400 --> 00:07:44,760 Speaker 1: anymore because we didn't know if Jenn, either Jin or 159 00:07:44,800 --> 00:07:46,440 Speaker 1: I were strong enough to be the lead singer. But 160 00:07:46,440 --> 00:07:48,400 Speaker 1: then I didn't want to have a new lead singer 161 00:07:48,520 --> 00:07:51,240 Speaker 1: because I just was like I still wanted to sing lead, 162 00:07:51,280 --> 00:07:52,920 Speaker 1: but I thought maybe that was the reason we weren't 163 00:07:52,960 --> 00:07:55,720 Speaker 1: working because my voice wasn't strong enough, and so it 164 00:07:55,880 --> 00:07:59,239 Speaker 1: just was I just didn't know even how to exist anymore. 165 00:07:59,680 --> 00:08:04,720 Speaker 1: So I was like, okay, literally, I one day I 166 00:08:04,760 --> 00:08:08,760 Speaker 1: found myself on my knees, like hyperventilating, like what the 167 00:08:08,800 --> 00:08:10,040 Speaker 1: hell am I gonna do in my life? And I 168 00:08:10,080 --> 00:08:11,680 Speaker 1: heard this voice in my head to me. I feel 169 00:08:11,680 --> 00:08:12,960 Speaker 1: like it was God. I don't know what it was, 170 00:08:13,000 --> 00:08:16,160 Speaker 1: but it just told me Austin, like screaming in my 171 00:08:16,240 --> 00:08:18,120 Speaker 1: head Austin. And I picked up when I moved to 172 00:08:18,120 --> 00:08:21,920 Speaker 1: Austin the next day. The next day, basically like within 173 00:08:21,960 --> 00:08:26,720 Speaker 1: the next week, what would you do in Austin? My 174 00:08:26,800 --> 00:08:29,080 Speaker 1: sister lives there and my niece lives there. So I 175 00:08:29,120 --> 00:08:33,560 Speaker 1: taught school music in the middle school music classes and 176 00:08:33,600 --> 00:08:35,199 Speaker 1: it was really sweet, and I stayed there for a 177 00:08:35,280 --> 00:08:38,439 Speaker 1: year and just kind of like reset. But it was 178 00:08:38,520 --> 00:08:40,440 Speaker 1: kind of intense, like that, I feel like I would 179 00:08:40,440 --> 00:08:43,000 Speaker 1: ever have to go that extreme again. If my life 180 00:08:43,000 --> 00:08:48,000 Speaker 1: fell apart. That's like a twentiesthing moved that stream fell apart. Yeah, 181 00:08:48,120 --> 00:08:50,320 Speaker 1: now it's falling apart so many times that I'm like, Okay, 182 00:08:50,360 --> 00:08:53,800 Speaker 1: well we'll rebuild this start over tomorrow or whatever. But 183 00:08:53,880 --> 00:08:56,200 Speaker 1: you know that first time when you missed so much 184 00:08:56,200 --> 00:08:58,840 Speaker 1: of your life into something and it crashes and you're like, 185 00:08:58,840 --> 00:09:01,439 Speaker 1: how do I live it? Well? Also, I think when 186 00:09:01,440 --> 00:09:04,280 Speaker 1: you're younger, you expect things to work out, Like I 187 00:09:04,360 --> 00:09:06,560 Speaker 1: just remember thinking like this is just gonna work out 188 00:09:06,559 --> 00:09:08,240 Speaker 1: because this is what I want to work out. And 189 00:09:08,240 --> 00:09:11,840 Speaker 1: then I realized, like, life doesn't work that way. So 190 00:09:11,880 --> 00:09:13,720 Speaker 1: it totally makes sense to me that you would panic. 191 00:09:14,160 --> 00:09:17,120 Speaker 1: So how did because you lived in Awesome for a 192 00:09:17,200 --> 00:09:19,440 Speaker 1: year which I didn't actually know that, but did you 193 00:09:19,520 --> 00:09:23,000 Speaker 1: come back? And that is that when amazing race happened. 194 00:09:23,080 --> 00:09:26,160 Speaker 1: So I was living in Austin and I hit another wall. 195 00:09:26,200 --> 00:09:28,120 Speaker 1: I was like, this isn't where I'm supposed to be. 196 00:09:28,120 --> 00:09:30,240 Speaker 1: I could just feel it. I love Austin, but it 197 00:09:30,360 --> 00:09:34,000 Speaker 1: just wasn't wasn't. There wasn't the entertainment industry that I 198 00:09:34,040 --> 00:09:36,600 Speaker 1: was looking for there. Although there's a great music scene, 199 00:09:36,600 --> 00:09:39,400 Speaker 1: it's like a live music scene, it's just such a 200 00:09:39,400 --> 00:09:41,600 Speaker 1: great vibe, but it just wasn't. I knew it wasn't. 201 00:09:41,600 --> 00:09:47,000 Speaker 1: We're supposed to stay and so Jin and I randomly 202 00:09:47,320 --> 00:09:51,000 Speaker 1: got a call from our agent and I guess I 203 00:09:51,040 --> 00:09:54,920 Speaker 1: had been an Awesome like six months maybe, and he 204 00:09:55,040 --> 00:09:57,520 Speaker 1: was like, Amazing Race is looking for two country singers? 205 00:09:57,520 --> 00:09:59,560 Speaker 1: Do you all want to do it? And we're like, 206 00:10:00,480 --> 00:10:02,800 Speaker 1: we both have no idea what we're doing with our lives, 207 00:10:02,840 --> 00:10:05,600 Speaker 1: Like police, can we go race around the world on 208 00:10:05,640 --> 00:10:08,680 Speaker 1: a reality show? So we kind of just got to 209 00:10:08,720 --> 00:10:11,680 Speaker 1: like hop right through and we had a video and 210 00:10:11,679 --> 00:10:13,560 Speaker 1: then we got on the show. Do they pay you 211 00:10:13,600 --> 00:10:15,640 Speaker 1: to be an Amazing Race? No, you just get paid 212 00:10:15,640 --> 00:10:19,520 Speaker 1: based on what place you get. So we got we 213 00:10:19,559 --> 00:10:22,040 Speaker 1: did it two times. We got the first time, we 214 00:10:22,400 --> 00:10:25,320 Speaker 1: got fourth place, and you get how much you get 215 00:10:25,320 --> 00:10:29,320 Speaker 1: for fourth place? I know you get twenty five thousand 216 00:10:29,480 --> 00:10:32,920 Speaker 1: for second place? You go from a million dollars and 217 00:10:32,920 --> 00:10:35,400 Speaker 1: we got second place. When we went to All Stars, 218 00:10:35,520 --> 00:10:38,200 Speaker 1: we lost by four seconds, so we went from a 219 00:10:38,280 --> 00:10:41,800 Speaker 1: million dollars dollars. That would be some life changing money 220 00:10:41,880 --> 00:10:46,679 Speaker 1: right there. So okay, how do you take off? Like 221 00:10:47,080 --> 00:10:49,600 Speaker 1: I can't imagine taking off that much time? Like how 222 00:10:49,640 --> 00:10:51,360 Speaker 1: did you live? Did they pay for you to do 223 00:10:51,440 --> 00:10:54,360 Speaker 1: the show? Okay? No, I mean like to do to live? 224 00:10:55,520 --> 00:10:58,800 Speaker 1: So what had happened was I had moved back to Nashville, 225 00:10:59,040 --> 00:11:01,720 Speaker 1: because in how did I move back to Nashville? I 226 00:11:01,760 --> 00:11:05,000 Speaker 1: was up here visiting gin, so like, did you have rent? 227 00:11:05,440 --> 00:11:08,040 Speaker 1: And we yes, and we were going I was actually 228 00:11:08,080 --> 00:11:10,760 Speaker 1: working as a song plugger. I'd moved back to Actually 229 00:11:10,800 --> 00:11:13,080 Speaker 1: I got offered a job after I live in Austin, 230 00:11:13,120 --> 00:11:15,280 Speaker 1: I got offered a job as a song plugger. So 231 00:11:15,320 --> 00:11:19,480 Speaker 1: I moved back to Nashville and they let me take 232 00:11:19,520 --> 00:11:22,280 Speaker 1: a leave of absence for a month. He said, Okay, 233 00:11:22,280 --> 00:11:23,720 Speaker 1: it's not as long as I was thinking. I was 234 00:11:23,720 --> 00:11:25,760 Speaker 1: thinking it was longer. And then Jin had a publishing 235 00:11:25,800 --> 00:11:29,680 Speaker 1: deal so she could, so she could. Yeah, so she 236 00:11:29,800 --> 00:11:31,880 Speaker 1: just didn't write for a month. So we kind of 237 00:11:31,880 --> 00:11:34,520 Speaker 1: had flexible situations. You have to have flexible situations. Don't 238 00:11:34,800 --> 00:11:36,400 Speaker 1: say I don't know how anyone does. Are like I 239 00:11:36,360 --> 00:11:38,680 Speaker 1: always wondered that about like people in the Bachelor, because 240 00:11:38,720 --> 00:11:40,520 Speaker 1: you don't get paid to do that kind of stuff either. 241 00:11:43,240 --> 00:11:47,160 Speaker 1: So first round, y'all guy, fourth fourth place, missed by 242 00:11:47,200 --> 00:11:50,240 Speaker 1: four seconds. No, that was all stars. And then second 243 00:11:50,240 --> 00:11:52,720 Speaker 1: time we did it, we got second place and lost 244 00:11:52,720 --> 00:11:55,600 Speaker 1: by four seconds. Oh my god, the torture. But it 245 00:11:55,640 --> 00:11:58,439 Speaker 1: was so fun and it was such an amazing opportunity 246 00:11:58,480 --> 00:12:00,760 Speaker 1: to travel the world. We went to twenty countries. What 247 00:12:00,840 --> 00:12:03,000 Speaker 1: was your favorite part of the whole thing, you know, 248 00:12:03,080 --> 00:12:05,720 Speaker 1: seeing the seeing the world and realizing that like we're 249 00:12:05,760 --> 00:12:08,160 Speaker 1: all the same. Everyone is kind of going for the 250 00:12:08,200 --> 00:12:10,640 Speaker 1: same thing in life. You're going for just like a 251 00:12:10,720 --> 00:12:14,680 Speaker 1: purpose and it's your family and friends, and you know, 252 00:12:14,760 --> 00:12:17,680 Speaker 1: it's not that much different, Like people live differently, but 253 00:12:17,760 --> 00:12:20,920 Speaker 1: everyone really wants the same things. And I also realized 254 00:12:20,920 --> 00:12:24,480 Speaker 1: that people are really good and kind and generous, and 255 00:12:24,480 --> 00:12:26,040 Speaker 1: then there's a lot of great people out there that 256 00:12:26,080 --> 00:12:29,840 Speaker 1: will help you, and it's just we're not so different, 257 00:12:30,080 --> 00:12:33,000 Speaker 1: you know, and the like I feel like also like 258 00:12:34,280 --> 00:12:37,680 Speaker 1: we get so lost in um the business and love 259 00:12:37,800 --> 00:12:41,840 Speaker 1: life that it just puts in a perspective that like 260 00:12:42,080 --> 00:12:44,760 Speaker 1: you can be happy doing a million different things, and 261 00:12:44,800 --> 00:12:46,760 Speaker 1: there's so many different ways to go through your life 262 00:12:47,080 --> 00:12:49,560 Speaker 1: and you don't have to do it a certain way. Yeah, 263 00:12:49,920 --> 00:12:51,880 Speaker 1: what would you say, like, if you think you can 264 00:12:51,960 --> 00:12:54,160 Speaker 1: be happy doing a million different things, what would you 265 00:12:54,240 --> 00:12:57,240 Speaker 1: say you saw in people? Was it about like the 266 00:12:57,280 --> 00:12:59,360 Speaker 1: people they were with that made him the happiest? The 267 00:12:59,480 --> 00:13:02,040 Speaker 1: jobs they add, like what kind of things? I think 268 00:13:02,080 --> 00:13:05,480 Speaker 1: that's a great question. Thanks, you're a really good to interview. 269 00:13:07,480 --> 00:13:09,800 Speaker 1: I think it is. I think it's um. I do 270 00:13:09,880 --> 00:13:11,840 Speaker 1: think it's like a state of mind, and I think 271 00:13:11,880 --> 00:13:17,320 Speaker 1: that it is involves I think it involves community. I 272 00:13:17,360 --> 00:13:20,160 Speaker 1: think you have to have a community of some sort 273 00:13:21,080 --> 00:13:26,200 Speaker 1: or something, some support system, import system, and then have 274 00:13:27,080 --> 00:13:29,000 Speaker 1: your purpose doesn't even have to be your job. I 275 00:13:29,080 --> 00:13:33,040 Speaker 1: just think it's just finding joy in your in your life, 276 00:13:33,040 --> 00:13:35,280 Speaker 1: and I think that involves community really. And then if 277 00:13:35,320 --> 00:13:37,640 Speaker 1: you do have a purpose that you like, a job 278 00:13:37,679 --> 00:13:39,480 Speaker 1: that you love, I think that's icing on the cake. 279 00:13:39,559 --> 00:13:41,040 Speaker 1: But really the big thing to me, I think it's 280 00:13:41,080 --> 00:13:44,000 Speaker 1: just having a community that supports you. I think that's 281 00:13:44,000 --> 00:13:46,400 Speaker 1: so true because if I think about my life even 282 00:13:47,320 --> 00:13:49,839 Speaker 1: that my job has become sort of my community or 283 00:13:49,880 --> 00:13:51,840 Speaker 1: like my people, you know, and I'm friends with all 284 00:13:51,840 --> 00:13:54,600 Speaker 1: the people I work with, and it makes the biggest difference, 285 00:13:54,679 --> 00:13:56,599 Speaker 1: especially if you're traveling with people or you know what 286 00:13:56,679 --> 00:13:58,600 Speaker 1: I mean. I think you have to let people in, 287 00:13:58,800 --> 00:14:02,079 Speaker 1: you know. I think that that's another thing like I've 288 00:14:02,160 --> 00:14:03,880 Speaker 1: learned with life, like it's okay for life to be 289 00:14:03,920 --> 00:14:06,120 Speaker 1: big and messy, and it doesn't you don't always have 290 00:14:06,120 --> 00:14:08,280 Speaker 1: to get along with everyone, and like you're not always 291 00:14:08,280 --> 00:14:11,040 Speaker 1: gonna see eye to eye, and you can show people 292 00:14:11,080 --> 00:14:14,280 Speaker 1: your vulnerable parts and you can, you know, cry to 293 00:14:14,400 --> 00:14:17,680 Speaker 1: your friends and your family. And that is really how 294 00:14:17,720 --> 00:14:21,680 Speaker 1: you have a community is by letting people build you up, 295 00:14:21,720 --> 00:14:23,560 Speaker 1: and you build people up because we need each other 296 00:14:23,600 --> 00:14:25,600 Speaker 1: to lean on. This life is too hard to do 297 00:14:25,640 --> 00:14:28,080 Speaker 1: to Loane, Oh my god, I meant that that you 298 00:14:29,280 --> 00:14:32,240 Speaker 1: need your people. You do well. Speaking of your people. 299 00:14:32,600 --> 00:14:35,560 Speaker 1: You've so you've been back in Nashville. You've done amazing rights, 300 00:14:35,560 --> 00:14:38,040 Speaker 1: You've done all these things. And you said, I did 301 00:14:38,080 --> 00:14:41,360 Speaker 1: not know that you guys dated before you left Nashville. 302 00:14:41,440 --> 00:14:44,080 Speaker 1: But now you're married to Michael Hobby, who is he's 303 00:14:44,120 --> 00:14:46,760 Speaker 1: the lead singer of a thousand horses? Right, Okay, Well, 304 00:14:46,840 --> 00:14:50,160 Speaker 1: now I need to hear the whole story. So he 305 00:14:50,840 --> 00:14:54,280 Speaker 1: we met when he was twenty one and I was four. 306 00:14:56,200 --> 00:15:00,120 Speaker 1: I okay, okay, okay, okay, Sugar's titting yours Puma is 307 00:15:00,160 --> 00:15:03,000 Speaker 1: like five or less. Okay, okay. So I'm glad you 308 00:15:03,040 --> 00:15:07,360 Speaker 1: said us straight. Thank you. Um yeah, so we were 309 00:15:08,680 --> 00:15:10,880 Speaker 1: I had known him because he was in music. He 310 00:15:10,960 --> 00:15:13,680 Speaker 1: moved here to music when he was eighteen. He always 311 00:15:13,760 --> 00:15:17,160 Speaker 1: knew he wanted to do music, And um, I met 312 00:15:17,200 --> 00:15:19,800 Speaker 1: him because we were working with the same producer for 313 00:15:19,840 --> 00:15:22,720 Speaker 1: a minute, and I saw him in the studio and 314 00:15:22,800 --> 00:15:24,360 Speaker 1: like the first time I met them, he and his 315 00:15:24,400 --> 00:15:28,800 Speaker 1: bandmates were sliding down the hall in their tube socks, 316 00:15:28,840 --> 00:15:32,920 Speaker 1: like a little risky business situation. They were just like wild, 317 00:15:32,960 --> 00:15:36,240 Speaker 1: like fun loving rock and rollers, and like that's literally 318 00:15:36,280 --> 00:15:37,880 Speaker 1: the first image I have them was in just like 319 00:15:37,960 --> 00:15:40,320 Speaker 1: sliding up and down the hallway and their tubes socks. 320 00:15:40,760 --> 00:15:42,880 Speaker 1: So were you like that's the man of my dreams 321 00:15:43,000 --> 00:15:46,800 Speaker 1: or kind of like could not It's kind of like, um, 322 00:15:47,400 --> 00:15:49,320 Speaker 1: they were fun, but I thought they were so young. 323 00:15:49,800 --> 00:15:52,680 Speaker 1: When you're in your twenties, like a twenty year old 324 00:15:52,680 --> 00:15:55,600 Speaker 1: when you're twenty three or twenty four is disgusting. It 325 00:15:55,640 --> 00:15:59,600 Speaker 1: makes the biggest difference, that age difference. Yeah, so I 326 00:15:59,640 --> 00:16:02,360 Speaker 1: was like, oh, I would never even consider dating someone 327 00:16:02,480 --> 00:16:07,160 Speaker 1: that young. Gross. So no, I didn't even think of 328 00:16:07,200 --> 00:16:11,760 Speaker 1: it romantically. And then although I was boy crazy, you 329 00:16:11,800 --> 00:16:15,520 Speaker 1: were what do you mean, goodness, I just loved boys. 330 00:16:15,560 --> 00:16:17,200 Speaker 1: I wanted to make out all the time I was 331 00:16:17,240 --> 00:16:20,440 Speaker 1: looking for love. I mean I was like a boy 332 00:16:20,440 --> 00:16:26,360 Speaker 1: crazy make out bandit. Yes, yes, So were you dating 333 00:16:26,360 --> 00:16:28,880 Speaker 1: a lot? I don't know it was dating. I mean 334 00:16:29,000 --> 00:16:30,760 Speaker 1: I didn't know how to date. I was a terrible 335 00:16:30,840 --> 00:16:33,440 Speaker 1: dater because I was so nervous to let people in 336 00:16:33,720 --> 00:16:36,040 Speaker 1: that Like, I was like super scared to like show 337 00:16:36,040 --> 00:16:37,760 Speaker 1: people who I really was, because I'm like, oh my god, 338 00:16:37,800 --> 00:16:39,160 Speaker 1: then they're gonna see the real me and they're not 339 00:16:39,160 --> 00:16:41,240 Speaker 1: gonna like me, because in my twenties, you know, you're 340 00:16:41,240 --> 00:16:44,360 Speaker 1: just so insecure, not willing to share who you are. 341 00:16:44,440 --> 00:16:47,000 Speaker 1: And I just like I hadn't I hadn't done my 342 00:16:47,080 --> 00:16:49,040 Speaker 1: therapy yet, I hadn't really gotten to the core of 343 00:16:49,040 --> 00:16:51,320 Speaker 1: my issues. So I just had all my issues, my 344 00:16:51,360 --> 00:16:53,680 Speaker 1: insecurities and all that, and I was like, oh no, 345 00:16:53,760 --> 00:16:55,600 Speaker 1: I'm just gonna be mean to people and see if 346 00:16:55,640 --> 00:16:57,480 Speaker 1: they will fight through it. So I was kind of 347 00:16:57,520 --> 00:16:59,960 Speaker 1: like a hardass. Two guys, I'm just not cute. It's 348 00:17:00,080 --> 00:17:03,120 Speaker 1: just dumb, you know. But did some guys like that, 349 00:17:03,360 --> 00:17:05,920 Speaker 1: I mean, well, okay. So then what happened not really, 350 00:17:06,000 --> 00:17:09,199 Speaker 1: it didn't really work out for me. I think a 351 00:17:09,200 --> 00:17:12,399 Speaker 1: lot of guys probably thought I was crazy. Yeah. But 352 00:17:12,520 --> 00:17:15,600 Speaker 1: then with Michael, what happened with him was I never 353 00:17:15,600 --> 00:17:18,639 Speaker 1: really romantically thought of him because he was younger. And 354 00:17:18,680 --> 00:17:22,400 Speaker 1: then one night I was out at Tin Roof because 355 00:17:22,400 --> 00:17:25,639 Speaker 1: I just go to Tin Roof all the time. It 356 00:17:25,720 --> 00:17:28,880 Speaker 1: was like the hot spot hot spot. I mean it's 357 00:17:28,880 --> 00:17:30,639 Speaker 1: still hot, and I guess it's still hot now. And 358 00:17:30,680 --> 00:17:34,040 Speaker 1: everyone's so young. I feel like the oldest person alive 359 00:17:34,119 --> 00:17:39,520 Speaker 1: when they're all like one and I'm like, I'm I'm 360 00:17:39,520 --> 00:17:42,520 Speaker 1: their same age. No, I'm like fifteen years older than 361 00:17:42,560 --> 00:17:46,040 Speaker 1: all of you. At least. It's like actually sad when 362 00:17:46,040 --> 00:17:48,480 Speaker 1: you go in, like you feel like that pathetic person. Yes, 363 00:17:48,880 --> 00:17:53,240 Speaker 1: I haven't actually been in in maybe over a year. Yeah, yeah, 364 00:17:53,320 --> 00:17:56,399 Speaker 1: I know. Um. So there was this guy there. He 365 00:17:56,480 --> 00:17:58,040 Speaker 1: was trying to flirt with me and he was like 366 00:17:58,560 --> 00:18:00,439 Speaker 1: weirding me out and I saw my goal. He was 367 00:18:00,440 --> 00:18:02,199 Speaker 1: there with a bunch of his friends and I was like, 368 00:18:02,240 --> 00:18:03,720 Speaker 1: oh my god, I know you. So I was like 369 00:18:03,800 --> 00:18:06,840 Speaker 1: wanting him to like help help me out. And then 370 00:18:06,880 --> 00:18:10,480 Speaker 1: we ended up talking and he was so fun and charismatic, 371 00:18:10,800 --> 00:18:12,919 Speaker 1: and I'd had enough drinks by the end of the 372 00:18:13,000 --> 00:18:14,760 Speaker 1: night and I was like getting ready to leave and 373 00:18:14,800 --> 00:18:16,560 Speaker 1: he didn't come with me, and I was like, I 374 00:18:16,560 --> 00:18:17,879 Speaker 1: went back for him and I'm like, are you not 375 00:18:17,920 --> 00:18:20,240 Speaker 1: going to walk me up out to like my cab? 376 00:18:20,760 --> 00:18:23,280 Speaker 1: And he ended up did He walked HI out there, 377 00:18:23,280 --> 00:18:24,760 Speaker 1: and I was like, well, I mean, do you just 378 00:18:24,760 --> 00:18:26,560 Speaker 1: want to come home with me and we didn't. I 379 00:18:26,600 --> 00:18:28,760 Speaker 1: was I was a good girl, Like I was a prude, 380 00:18:29,119 --> 00:18:31,680 Speaker 1: but I used to like I wanted to like shack 381 00:18:31,760 --> 00:18:34,320 Speaker 1: up and spend the night, so he can't snuggle and 382 00:18:34,400 --> 00:18:36,280 Speaker 1: spend the night. And the next day I woke up 383 00:18:36,320 --> 00:18:37,720 Speaker 1: and I was like, oh my god, Like this was 384 00:18:37,800 --> 00:18:40,439 Speaker 1: not someone I was thinking that I wanted to be with, 385 00:18:40,560 --> 00:18:43,200 Speaker 1: but he just made me feel like I always wanted 386 00:18:43,200 --> 00:18:46,760 Speaker 1: to feel. His conversation was so funny and charming, and 387 00:18:46,800 --> 00:18:48,840 Speaker 1: he was so easy going and had such a great 388 00:18:48,880 --> 00:18:51,680 Speaker 1: attitude that we just started dating that day and we 389 00:18:51,760 --> 00:18:53,800 Speaker 1: dated for four years, never broke up, and then you 390 00:18:53,920 --> 00:18:56,240 Speaker 1: literally just moved to Austin. Yeah, because I was an 391 00:18:56,280 --> 00:19:01,199 Speaker 1: insane person. God, Michael loves me like poor, like we 392 00:19:01,400 --> 00:19:03,600 Speaker 1: really we say we went through it on our front end, 393 00:19:03,640 --> 00:19:06,240 Speaker 1: and so now like our second half, like we had 394 00:19:06,280 --> 00:19:08,480 Speaker 1: a two year breakup and then then we eloped in 395 00:19:08,520 --> 00:19:11,560 Speaker 1: the Bahamas after four months of being back together, and 396 00:19:11,640 --> 00:19:14,320 Speaker 1: our marriage has been great, just easy because we've already 397 00:19:14,400 --> 00:19:16,399 Speaker 1: dealt with all of the crap. You know, we like 398 00:19:16,440 --> 00:19:20,040 Speaker 1: went through all the things in our twenties together and 399 00:19:20,080 --> 00:19:23,400 Speaker 1: now it's like, Okay, we know he knows my crazy 400 00:19:23,520 --> 00:19:25,359 Speaker 1: and now I'm really not even crazy anymore. It's like 401 00:19:25,400 --> 00:19:27,400 Speaker 1: I worked it all out. But what do you said 402 00:19:27,440 --> 00:19:29,639 Speaker 1: you went to therapy? What was like the big takeaway 403 00:19:29,680 --> 00:19:34,240 Speaker 1: for you? Especially with dating? We went to a therapist together. 404 00:19:34,920 --> 00:19:38,280 Speaker 1: If anyone wants a great therapist in Nashville, um, Susie 405 00:19:38,640 --> 00:19:41,280 Speaker 1: and she's at the Estuary. She's great, she's a good 406 00:19:41,320 --> 00:19:45,200 Speaker 1: couple of therapists. Yes, she was a theme changer for us. 407 00:19:44,720 --> 00:19:47,679 Speaker 1: Don't have you done individual therapy? Isn't it such a 408 00:19:47,720 --> 00:19:50,600 Speaker 1: different because I did years of individual and I was like, 409 00:19:50,720 --> 00:19:53,480 Speaker 1: I got this therapy thing down, went to couples and 410 00:19:53,520 --> 00:19:56,399 Speaker 1: it was like, oh shit, it's so different, and you 411 00:19:56,520 --> 00:19:58,800 Speaker 1: learned so much about yourself in such a different way. 412 00:19:59,320 --> 00:20:01,919 Speaker 1: It's so true. Yeah, So what did Susie teach you? 413 00:20:02,080 --> 00:20:07,879 Speaker 1: She divided our personalities into three chairs. Have your wounded child, 414 00:20:08,840 --> 00:20:13,359 Speaker 1: your middle manipulator, and then your truth chair. And so 415 00:20:13,800 --> 00:20:18,840 Speaker 1: your middle chair manipulator is trying to protect your wounded child. 416 00:20:19,600 --> 00:20:23,040 Speaker 1: So whatever, and it doesn't even mean that like something 417 00:20:23,160 --> 00:20:27,720 Speaker 1: terrible happened in your Childhood's just whatever your personality has 418 00:20:27,800 --> 00:20:31,439 Speaker 1: tucked away as painful moments in your life that you 419 00:20:31,480 --> 00:20:35,800 Speaker 1: are insecure about. Trying to hide trigger something whatever you've 420 00:20:35,840 --> 00:20:40,439 Speaker 1: gone through that hurt you as a child that you 421 00:20:40,520 --> 00:20:43,160 Speaker 1: do not want to crack open, and you don't even 422 00:20:43,160 --> 00:20:44,520 Speaker 1: realize you don't want to crack it open, but you 423 00:20:44,640 --> 00:20:47,000 Speaker 1: you just don't want anyone to know, and it's like pain. 424 00:20:48,160 --> 00:20:51,640 Speaker 1: So that's your wounded child. And then your middle chair manipulator, 425 00:20:51,680 --> 00:20:55,439 Speaker 1: is doing every single thing it can to never let 426 00:20:55,480 --> 00:20:58,640 Speaker 1: those wounds be opened. And then you have your truth 427 00:20:58,720 --> 00:21:01,280 Speaker 1: chair sitting over here. That's the true that sees it 428 00:21:01,320 --> 00:21:03,280 Speaker 1: for what it is and doesn't take any of it personal. 429 00:21:03,560 --> 00:21:06,199 Speaker 1: So what we had to do was we had to 430 00:21:06,240 --> 00:21:08,879 Speaker 1: explain how we were feeling about each other and the 431 00:21:08,920 --> 00:21:11,719 Speaker 1: problems that we were having and how we were viewing 432 00:21:11,840 --> 00:21:14,639 Speaker 1: our life and relationship. And we would have to she 433 00:21:14,640 --> 00:21:17,280 Speaker 1: would make us sit in the chairs that we're talking, 434 00:21:18,600 --> 00:21:21,680 Speaker 1: so we'd have to if I was like talking about 435 00:21:21,720 --> 00:21:24,280 Speaker 1: something that I don't even I can't remember what our 436 00:21:24,280 --> 00:21:25,840 Speaker 1: issues were back then, but like I would have to 437 00:21:25,880 --> 00:21:28,400 Speaker 1: like to be like, okay, you're speaking from your wounded child. 438 00:21:28,440 --> 00:21:30,080 Speaker 1: So I'd have to go sit in my wounded child, 439 00:21:30,119 --> 00:21:32,040 Speaker 1: and I had to have to like analyze what that 440 00:21:32,080 --> 00:21:35,399 Speaker 1: pain is and why I'm acting out that way, and 441 00:21:35,440 --> 00:21:38,160 Speaker 1: then I'd have to go sit in my truth chair 442 00:21:38,560 --> 00:21:41,960 Speaker 1: and say what really needs to happen. So it'd be 443 00:21:42,080 --> 00:21:44,520 Speaker 1: like your wounded child is where it originated. So it 444 00:21:44,600 --> 00:21:46,840 Speaker 1: might it might not have even really been about Michael. 445 00:21:46,920 --> 00:21:49,960 Speaker 1: It wasn't. Probably most times it wasn't. Yeah, God, isn't 446 00:21:49,960 --> 00:21:52,399 Speaker 1: that so interesting? I interviewed someone the other day and 447 00:21:52,400 --> 00:21:56,760 Speaker 1: they said, Um, we recreate all the old wounds or 448 00:21:56,800 --> 00:22:02,359 Speaker 1: whatever in relationships, Like we subconsciously see out relationships that 449 00:22:02,400 --> 00:22:05,040 Speaker 1: will recreate those wounds, which I think is so because 450 00:22:05,080 --> 00:22:07,639 Speaker 1: it's comfortable. I guess, yeah, you're used to it, and 451 00:22:07,680 --> 00:22:10,440 Speaker 1: I think subconsciously we're trying to heal the old wounds. 452 00:22:10,880 --> 00:22:13,280 Speaker 1: So if you're hoping someone will come around and do it, 453 00:22:13,359 --> 00:22:16,439 Speaker 1: do it differently. Really it's the same pattern totally. So 454 00:22:16,520 --> 00:22:18,680 Speaker 1: unless you start doing your work like what you guys did, 455 00:22:18,680 --> 00:22:21,280 Speaker 1: you'll probably just repeat old patterns over and over and over. 456 00:22:21,640 --> 00:22:24,720 Speaker 1: So you love therapy. To love therapy, I think everyone 457 00:22:24,760 --> 00:22:26,720 Speaker 1: needs to go to Oh my god, it's for me. 458 00:22:26,800 --> 00:22:29,120 Speaker 1: I'm like, when I hear people being like I don't 459 00:22:29,160 --> 00:22:30,760 Speaker 1: need to go to therapy, like I'm not messed up 460 00:22:30,880 --> 00:22:32,800 Speaker 1: or whatever, I'm like, it doesn't have nobody, you don't 461 00:22:32,840 --> 00:22:36,720 Speaker 1: have to be and we're all like affected by whatever 462 00:22:36,760 --> 00:22:38,040 Speaker 1: it was. Like you said, it doesn't have to be 463 00:22:38,119 --> 00:22:41,479 Speaker 1: some traumatic, terrible thing, but your experience has shaped you. 464 00:22:42,800 --> 00:22:45,879 Speaker 1: So just go talk it out, talk it out, I know. 465 00:22:46,680 --> 00:22:48,280 Speaker 1: So it helps you all to do. I love that 466 00:22:48,359 --> 00:22:50,360 Speaker 1: three chair thing. How would you get to your truth 467 00:22:50,440 --> 00:22:52,640 Speaker 1: chair chair? Did you have to just feel so safe? 468 00:22:54,119 --> 00:22:59,240 Speaker 1: Because when you actually sit in your in your wounded 469 00:22:59,359 --> 00:23:02,320 Speaker 1: child or middle chair manipulator, and you're realizing what your 470 00:23:02,320 --> 00:23:05,760 Speaker 1: middle chair is doing to protect your child, your wounded child, 471 00:23:06,200 --> 00:23:08,879 Speaker 1: when you actually have to sit in those chairs and 472 00:23:09,000 --> 00:23:12,560 Speaker 1: like say it out loud, you realize that it's not 473 00:23:13,320 --> 00:23:17,919 Speaker 1: the truth because it's it's just um, it's not she 474 00:23:18,119 --> 00:23:21,840 Speaker 1: it's not calm, she said, anything urgent is not real either. 475 00:23:22,400 --> 00:23:25,440 Speaker 1: That's good, Like if it feels urgent, it's not real 476 00:23:25,520 --> 00:23:27,840 Speaker 1: because the truth is always the truth. It's always the truth. 477 00:23:27,920 --> 00:23:30,160 Speaker 1: Like there's no urgency with the truth. So it's like 478 00:23:30,400 --> 00:23:32,840 Speaker 1: if you feel like, I don't know, if you just 479 00:23:33,000 --> 00:23:35,959 Speaker 1: if there's crazy energy around what you're saying, then it's 480 00:23:36,000 --> 00:23:37,920 Speaker 1: not the truth because the truth is calm. The truth 481 00:23:38,000 --> 00:23:41,359 Speaker 1: is just what it is. And so what's your question? 482 00:23:43,440 --> 00:23:44,919 Speaker 1: She just had a baby, which will get to you 483 00:23:44,960 --> 00:23:49,720 Speaker 1: in a minute, pregnancy brain of baby brain. So it's 484 00:23:50,160 --> 00:23:53,359 Speaker 1: really well, I'm Kelly Shows in my house. I have 485 00:23:53,480 --> 00:23:57,399 Speaker 1: on socks over stretched pants. I have on a shirt 486 00:23:57,440 --> 00:24:00,160 Speaker 1: that I slept this outfit last. Actually wore this out 487 00:24:00,200 --> 00:24:03,760 Speaker 1: the last time, slept in it. I have no manifest 488 00:24:03,840 --> 00:24:06,320 Speaker 1: that ship, which is also and then I have days 489 00:24:06,320 --> 00:24:10,520 Speaker 1: of David Hasselhoff on my other I'm just like really 490 00:24:10,600 --> 00:24:14,000 Speaker 1: killing the game these days. Oh, I can't even remember 491 00:24:14,040 --> 00:24:17,520 Speaker 1: what asked. Don't either. Great, I'm sure it was great, 492 00:24:17,760 --> 00:24:22,600 Speaker 1: but we'll just basically go therapy. Yeah, go to how 493 00:24:22,640 --> 00:24:24,399 Speaker 1: do you get to your truth chair? But you just 494 00:24:24,440 --> 00:24:27,639 Speaker 1: said because basically you're realizing that it wasn't even about 495 00:24:27,640 --> 00:24:29,920 Speaker 1: that person or that it's done. And once you're sitting 496 00:24:29,960 --> 00:24:31,560 Speaker 1: in the other two chairs and you realize that you're 497 00:24:31,720 --> 00:24:34,000 Speaker 1: acting to spas, and then you have to go sit 498 00:24:34,040 --> 00:24:35,760 Speaker 1: in the truth and she makes you tell you what 499 00:24:35,800 --> 00:24:38,240 Speaker 1: the truth is. You have to even if you don't 500 00:24:38,240 --> 00:24:40,040 Speaker 1: know what the truth is and you reluctantly don't want 501 00:24:40,040 --> 00:24:42,359 Speaker 1: to give into it. You finally figure out what the 502 00:24:42,359 --> 00:24:44,760 Speaker 1: truth is and she'll help you get there. But you 503 00:24:44,800 --> 00:24:48,000 Speaker 1: know it because it's like, the truth isn't urgent, The 504 00:24:48,000 --> 00:24:53,920 Speaker 1: truth isn't angry, The truth isn't like spas, that isn't afraid. 505 00:24:54,640 --> 00:24:59,840 Speaker 1: Truth is just calm and knowing, you know, And so 506 00:25:00,600 --> 00:25:03,360 Speaker 1: to get to that place, the other two chairs aren't there. 507 00:25:03,400 --> 00:25:05,280 Speaker 1: So if you're feeling anything but that, then you're not 508 00:25:05,280 --> 00:25:07,359 Speaker 1: in your truth. You know, it's not the truth. God, 509 00:25:07,400 --> 00:25:11,960 Speaker 1: that's a good one. You wing some therapy talk on here. Yeah, um, well, 510 00:25:12,000 --> 00:25:14,280 Speaker 1: so that obviously says a lot about how you and 511 00:25:14,359 --> 00:25:16,120 Speaker 1: Michael got to the place you are now. But let's 512 00:25:16,119 --> 00:25:18,760 Speaker 1: talk about Sunny since we just talked about the baby. 513 00:25:19,280 --> 00:25:23,720 Speaker 1: So how does she know? She's a weeks to week weeks? So, yeah, 514 00:25:24,000 --> 00:25:28,600 Speaker 1: to nine weeks tomorrow. How has it been? It has 515 00:25:28,640 --> 00:25:32,640 Speaker 1: been amazing. Yeah. I wanted a baby so badly, so 516 00:25:32,760 --> 00:25:34,760 Speaker 1: it has been. And I had her when I was 517 00:25:34,800 --> 00:25:37,240 Speaker 1: thirty six years old, and so I feel like I 518 00:25:37,280 --> 00:25:40,520 Speaker 1: had tons of mother friends to look up to. Yeah. 519 00:25:40,760 --> 00:25:44,800 Speaker 1: I've never been one who's wanted to do anything first, Like, 520 00:25:45,240 --> 00:25:48,520 Speaker 1: I'm not trying to like pave the way. Yeah, I 521 00:25:48,560 --> 00:25:52,480 Speaker 1: want to see people paved the way. I want to study, learn, analyze, 522 00:25:52,880 --> 00:25:55,639 Speaker 1: talk to them. I think that's why podcasts and interview 523 00:25:55,640 --> 00:25:57,600 Speaker 1: people because I want to know people's stories so I 524 00:25:57,640 --> 00:26:00,280 Speaker 1: can figure things like take the little pieces you like 525 00:26:00,480 --> 00:26:03,879 Speaker 1: and use them because I'm just like the world is 526 00:26:03,920 --> 00:26:07,040 Speaker 1: so big and overwhelming to me that I need guidance. 527 00:26:07,960 --> 00:26:10,359 Speaker 1: So parents had always freaked me out. Although I always 528 00:26:10,440 --> 00:26:12,320 Speaker 1: knew I wanted to be a mom, I just I 529 00:26:12,359 --> 00:26:14,600 Speaker 1: wasn't ready for a long time. And then it hit 530 00:26:14,600 --> 00:26:18,000 Speaker 1: me like a ton of bricks, and I and we had. 531 00:26:18,000 --> 00:26:20,320 Speaker 1: It was a long journey for us. We tried for 532 00:26:20,320 --> 00:26:24,159 Speaker 1: a year and how a miscarriage and chemical pregnancy, and like, 533 00:26:24,200 --> 00:26:26,760 Speaker 1: I just never knew how emotional the journey was because 534 00:26:27,000 --> 00:26:29,240 Speaker 1: you literally try your whole life not to get pregnant, 535 00:26:29,440 --> 00:26:32,800 Speaker 1: right and literally you know, and then all of a 536 00:26:32,880 --> 00:26:36,919 Speaker 1: sudden you're wanted, and it's like so hard pregnant. A 537 00:26:36,960 --> 00:26:39,920 Speaker 1: lot of the time, some people get pregnant first try. 538 00:26:39,960 --> 00:26:42,560 Speaker 1: It's easy, easy, but that just wasn't how it was 539 00:26:42,600 --> 00:26:46,720 Speaker 1: for us, and so it was really emotional. I'm really like, um, 540 00:26:46,760 --> 00:26:48,800 Speaker 1: it's a really hard year. But it gave me such 541 00:26:48,880 --> 00:26:53,000 Speaker 1: gratitude and appreciation for for the gift of Sonny and 542 00:26:53,200 --> 00:26:55,439 Speaker 1: being able to carry her and have her and be 543 00:26:55,520 --> 00:26:57,359 Speaker 1: able to get pregnant because I don't know if I 544 00:26:57,359 --> 00:26:59,760 Speaker 1: would have appreciated it like I did, because I would 545 00:26:59,760 --> 00:27:01,840 Speaker 1: have just thought it was easy and it's just not 546 00:27:01,920 --> 00:27:04,159 Speaker 1: and it's such a miracle. Did you have to do 547 00:27:04,240 --> 00:27:07,520 Speaker 1: shots or anything? No, we were about to have to 548 00:27:07,600 --> 00:27:09,840 Speaker 1: probably we are kind of college. Just was like, okay, 549 00:27:09,880 --> 00:27:12,359 Speaker 1: you're thirty five. At the time, We've been trying for 550 00:27:12,400 --> 00:27:14,320 Speaker 1: a year. I had done a round of clond which 551 00:27:14,359 --> 00:27:17,520 Speaker 1: is a fertility drug that helps you ovulate more, and 552 00:27:17,560 --> 00:27:21,000 Speaker 1: we had gotten pregnant and then miscarried, and then she 553 00:27:21,160 --> 00:27:23,840 Speaker 1: was like, your body really needs a break now because 554 00:27:23,880 --> 00:27:27,200 Speaker 1: it's been through so much and like just so many things, 555 00:27:27,240 --> 00:27:29,520 Speaker 1: and so we just kind of like took it off 556 00:27:29,520 --> 00:27:31,440 Speaker 1: the table for a while. We're like, okay, we can't 557 00:27:31,440 --> 00:27:34,640 Speaker 1: even get pregnant, Like we gotta gotta take at least 558 00:27:34,640 --> 00:27:38,240 Speaker 1: like three months off. And I stopped like checking movulation 559 00:27:38,560 --> 00:27:42,000 Speaker 1: because I was like on on a clock, like checking movulation, 560 00:27:42,119 --> 00:27:44,480 Speaker 1: like trying to make it happen. And I do think 561 00:27:44,800 --> 00:27:48,399 Speaker 1: that stress does not help. No, I know, but everyone's like, 562 00:27:48,480 --> 00:27:50,679 Speaker 1: don't stress, but it's like, how would you not? You 563 00:27:50,720 --> 00:27:52,240 Speaker 1: don't want to stress? And all of a sudden, like 564 00:27:52,240 --> 00:27:54,560 Speaker 1: when it hasn't happened and hasn't happened then, because in 565 00:27:54,600 --> 00:27:57,800 Speaker 1: the beginning it wasn't stressful, it was great, and then 566 00:27:57,840 --> 00:27:59,600 Speaker 1: all of a sudden, like six months had happened, we 567 00:27:59,680 --> 00:28:02,800 Speaker 1: had a local pregnancy. It wasn't that. It's where you 568 00:28:02,840 --> 00:28:05,919 Speaker 1: get pregnant early and it doesn't stick, so it's like 569 00:28:06,000 --> 00:28:10,800 Speaker 1: five weeks like you'd never like, um, it never implants 570 00:28:10,840 --> 00:28:14,600 Speaker 1: in uterus, but you'll get a positive pregnancy test, so 571 00:28:14,640 --> 00:28:17,119 Speaker 1: it's like it has the sperm and the egg have connected, 572 00:28:17,560 --> 00:28:20,840 Speaker 1: but they just don't inferent into your uterus. Yeah, so 573 00:28:20,880 --> 00:28:23,640 Speaker 1: how did you figure out that that went away? Because 574 00:28:23,920 --> 00:28:27,600 Speaker 1: I took a pregnancy test and got a positive and 575 00:28:27,640 --> 00:28:30,840 Speaker 1: then I started my period like a week later. I know, 576 00:28:30,920 --> 00:28:34,520 Speaker 1: it's so sad. It's really the mind part of that 577 00:28:36,359 --> 00:28:38,880 Speaker 1: thinking about it, because you just want it so badly. 578 00:28:39,440 --> 00:28:42,000 Speaker 1: But I mean, there's just a bigger picture to it all, 579 00:28:42,040 --> 00:28:44,160 Speaker 1: you know. And that's the one thing that I've learned 580 00:28:44,240 --> 00:28:48,760 Speaker 1: already with parenting is like it's such a you gotta 581 00:28:48,800 --> 00:28:52,920 Speaker 1: have faith with with having a child, with the whole process, 582 00:28:53,160 --> 00:28:57,560 Speaker 1: because it's just so much bigger than a human and 583 00:28:57,600 --> 00:29:00,240 Speaker 1: we can't control any of it, you know. All you 584 00:29:00,280 --> 00:29:01,800 Speaker 1: can do is just try to be the best parent 585 00:29:01,880 --> 00:29:03,400 Speaker 1: you can be, the best mom you can be. But 586 00:29:03,480 --> 00:29:06,480 Speaker 1: like Sunday is her own person, She's on her own path, 587 00:29:07,120 --> 00:29:09,560 Speaker 1: and I'm just here to help guide her. I got 588 00:29:09,600 --> 00:29:13,600 Speaker 1: She's not mine, my possession or anything for me to 589 00:29:13,680 --> 00:29:16,719 Speaker 1: like hoard. I just have to help guide her, you know. 590 00:29:16,800 --> 00:29:19,600 Speaker 1: And she's just like learning that so quickly. I think 591 00:29:19,640 --> 00:29:22,719 Speaker 1: with the process of getting pregnant and made me release 592 00:29:22,840 --> 00:29:27,080 Speaker 1: control kind of early. So I'm grateful for that. And 593 00:29:27,120 --> 00:29:29,200 Speaker 1: I think just when I did get pregnant, I had 594 00:29:29,200 --> 00:29:31,120 Speaker 1: a lot of anxiety during my pregnancy because I was 595 00:29:31,160 --> 00:29:33,520 Speaker 1: so afraid of miscaring the whole time. And I wish 596 00:29:33,600 --> 00:29:35,760 Speaker 1: that I wouldn't have had anxiety, but it's just so hard. 597 00:29:35,840 --> 00:29:38,520 Speaker 1: Your mind is so it's so crazy what the mind 598 00:29:38,560 --> 00:29:41,200 Speaker 1: will do, you know, especially like once you've lived through something, 599 00:29:41,200 --> 00:29:44,440 Speaker 1: it's like you keep replaying that fear. And so when 600 00:29:44,440 --> 00:29:47,280 Speaker 1: she came, it was and we had um. When she 601 00:29:47,520 --> 00:29:50,680 Speaker 1: came into this world, it was literally the most amazing 602 00:29:50,880 --> 00:29:53,840 Speaker 1: day of my life. And Michael sub but like just 603 00:29:54,000 --> 00:29:58,480 Speaker 1: meeting her and like knowing that like she is the 604 00:29:58,520 --> 00:30:01,600 Speaker 1: one that came here, and like I kind of believe 605 00:30:01,600 --> 00:30:03,160 Speaker 1: that she chose us to be her parents, and that 606 00:30:03,240 --> 00:30:06,600 Speaker 1: she wants to have this earth experience and that I 607 00:30:06,680 --> 00:30:08,200 Speaker 1: get to be her mom and Michael gets to be 608 00:30:08,200 --> 00:30:10,040 Speaker 1: her dad, and so like, it has just given me 609 00:30:10,080 --> 00:30:13,480 Speaker 1: such a joy to be her parent and her mom 610 00:30:13,520 --> 00:30:15,680 Speaker 1: and to get to walk this walk with her. So 611 00:30:15,720 --> 00:30:18,880 Speaker 1: even though it's exhausting and I'm tired and I look 612 00:30:19,000 --> 00:30:23,200 Speaker 1: like a hobo half the time. Literally, I looked terrible 613 00:30:23,280 --> 00:30:28,880 Speaker 1: every day, but I'm just so grateful that I get 614 00:30:28,920 --> 00:30:32,360 Speaker 1: to have this privilege because I know it's privilege. And 615 00:30:32,440 --> 00:30:34,760 Speaker 1: she's just the sweetest little thing and she's so cute 616 00:30:34,800 --> 00:30:39,360 Speaker 1: and she smiles. Now, oh that's good bet when they 617 00:30:39,360 --> 00:30:43,320 Speaker 1: start reacting that way. Yes, she's a precious little thing. 618 00:30:45,760 --> 00:30:48,120 Speaker 1: I was going to ask you how mother had changed you, 619 00:30:48,120 --> 00:30:50,240 Speaker 1: but I think you just answered because does that transfer 620 00:30:50,280 --> 00:30:51,960 Speaker 1: into the rest of your life too? It's sort of 621 00:30:52,000 --> 00:30:56,480 Speaker 1: like a surrender. It sounds like, yeah, it is, And 622 00:30:56,800 --> 00:30:59,840 Speaker 1: I did. I started this little mom chat thing because 623 00:31:00,240 --> 00:31:02,840 Speaker 1: now that I am a mom, like, I have so 624 00:31:02,840 --> 00:31:05,280 Speaker 1: many questions about everything and I don't know how to 625 00:31:05,520 --> 00:31:08,920 Speaker 1: do any of any of it. I didn't babysit. I 626 00:31:08,920 --> 00:31:11,320 Speaker 1: didn't people we're on kids like I'm not like this 627 00:31:11,360 --> 00:31:14,719 Speaker 1: like baby guru person. So it's been awesome to have 628 00:31:14,760 --> 00:31:17,640 Speaker 1: the Instagram and like podcast community because so many people 629 00:31:17,680 --> 00:31:20,600 Speaker 1: have so much knowledge about everything, so you ask questions 630 00:31:20,640 --> 00:31:23,120 Speaker 1: and you get lots of great answers. Yeah. I've been 631 00:31:23,120 --> 00:31:26,000 Speaker 1: doing like a little mom chat and one of the 632 00:31:26,120 --> 00:31:31,400 Speaker 1: last podcast I did was on our birthing story, and um, 633 00:31:31,480 --> 00:31:35,920 Speaker 1: I said, someone told me that when you have a child, 634 00:31:36,720 --> 00:31:39,120 Speaker 1: your heart literally is like on the outside of your body. 635 00:31:39,720 --> 00:31:43,320 Speaker 1: Like it just makes I'm still like hormone. It's okay, 636 00:31:43,320 --> 00:31:45,160 Speaker 1: I'm on hormones right now to you because I'm freezing 637 00:31:45,160 --> 00:31:49,480 Speaker 1: my eggs. So we're like crying together. Thank you, Helly, 638 00:31:49,520 --> 00:31:53,120 Speaker 1: that's genius. Such a good decision. Thank you. Oh god, Yeah, 639 00:31:53,120 --> 00:31:55,280 Speaker 1: I bet your own hormones, like you gotta give yoursel shots. 640 00:31:55,320 --> 00:31:57,360 Speaker 1: Not yet, I'm not to the shots. I'm on the pills. 641 00:31:57,400 --> 00:31:59,520 Speaker 1: But I've literally been crying at the job of the house. 642 00:32:00,080 --> 00:32:06,400 Speaker 1: I know this podcasts to turn. Just let it out, girl, 643 00:32:07,880 --> 00:32:12,720 Speaker 1: let's just have a moment to release those surge. I 644 00:32:12,760 --> 00:32:15,880 Speaker 1: mean it truly is. I know. I've literally just been 645 00:32:15,960 --> 00:32:18,240 Speaker 1: letting myself do it because you don't really have a choice. 646 00:32:18,240 --> 00:32:20,600 Speaker 1: It's like what's happening to you? What are you gonna do? 647 00:32:20,640 --> 00:32:22,400 Speaker 1: You can't keep it in, you gotta let it out. 648 00:32:22,480 --> 00:32:24,400 Speaker 1: And I know so much better once I cry too, 649 00:32:24,440 --> 00:32:27,160 Speaker 1: it's like a release. Yes, I'm so happy for you. 650 00:32:27,200 --> 00:32:30,440 Speaker 1: That's a big decision. It's a big decision. It's been 651 00:32:30,440 --> 00:32:32,280 Speaker 1: a long time. Comment. How do you decide to do it? 652 00:32:32,760 --> 00:32:35,600 Speaker 1: Um I, now you turned you turn this on me? 653 00:32:36,520 --> 00:32:41,000 Speaker 1: She's a podcast host. Um I just I've been thinking 654 00:32:41,000 --> 00:32:42,680 Speaker 1: about it for about a year, and I just got 655 00:32:42,720 --> 00:32:43,840 Speaker 1: to the point where I was kind of like what 656 00:32:43,880 --> 00:32:45,880 Speaker 1: you're saying. I got to the place where I was like, no, 657 00:32:45,960 --> 00:32:48,719 Speaker 1: I really do want kids, like that. The idea of 658 00:32:49,000 --> 00:32:52,800 Speaker 1: the choice not being there anymore is what really made 659 00:32:52,800 --> 00:32:54,800 Speaker 1: me have to look in the mirror and be like, 660 00:32:54,920 --> 00:32:57,560 Speaker 1: do you want kids or not? And I do? And so, 661 00:32:58,600 --> 00:33:01,400 Speaker 1: um yeah, I had to just decide this was the 662 00:33:01,400 --> 00:33:04,600 Speaker 1: best route for me at this point. And it's been 663 00:33:05,120 --> 00:33:07,320 Speaker 1: sort of scary but also kind of you know, like 664 00:33:07,440 --> 00:33:10,920 Speaker 1: powerful feeling and relieving at the same time. So I 665 00:33:10,960 --> 00:33:14,360 Speaker 1: think that is so awesome. Thank you or just and 666 00:33:14,400 --> 00:33:16,280 Speaker 1: it's going to give you such a piece of mind 667 00:33:17,120 --> 00:33:18,680 Speaker 1: and it's not gonna make you feel like you need 668 00:33:18,720 --> 00:33:23,080 Speaker 1: to rush into relationship, just get pregnant with someone who's 669 00:33:23,120 --> 00:33:25,600 Speaker 1: like kind of feels like they're a good match, but 670 00:33:25,640 --> 00:33:27,120 Speaker 1: like they're not really who you want to be your 671 00:33:27,160 --> 00:33:30,120 Speaker 1: baby daddy, right, you know, totally because it took that 672 00:33:30,160 --> 00:33:31,760 Speaker 1: pressure off because for a second I was like, I 673 00:33:31,840 --> 00:33:34,720 Speaker 1: gotta find a relationship and that just have a baby. Yeah, 674 00:33:34,760 --> 00:33:36,960 Speaker 1: and how do you date like that? Like to be 675 00:33:37,000 --> 00:33:40,200 Speaker 1: like what? And also you're probably gonna not end up 676 00:33:40,240 --> 00:33:42,680 Speaker 1: with the right person. I don't want to settle. It 677 00:33:42,720 --> 00:33:44,760 Speaker 1: has to be the right situation for me. And that's 678 00:33:44,800 --> 00:33:49,840 Speaker 1: always been the case. So you don't need thanks. You 679 00:33:49,920 --> 00:33:53,000 Speaker 1: need to just let it come when it's supposed to come. Yeah, 680 00:33:53,320 --> 00:33:55,840 Speaker 1: that's just that's kind of been a deal for me. 681 00:33:55,880 --> 00:33:58,560 Speaker 1: And so that's what I'm doing. I'm proud of you. 682 00:33:58,720 --> 00:34:01,440 Speaker 1: Thank you just as you you it's a big undertaking 683 00:34:01,480 --> 00:34:04,280 Speaker 1: because you got it has been So what is the process? 684 00:34:04,320 --> 00:34:07,320 Speaker 1: So I started on these pills first and now this 685 00:34:07,400 --> 00:34:10,080 Speaker 1: is disgusting, but always I just I'm going to tell everybody, 686 00:34:10,120 --> 00:34:12,640 Speaker 1: but I have to do suppositories twice a day, like 687 00:34:12,719 --> 00:34:17,000 Speaker 1: vaginal suppositories, which is disgusting, but I do that in 688 00:34:17,760 --> 00:34:21,560 Speaker 1: my brain restaurant. Yeah, that's what I'm on, um, it 689 00:34:21,640 --> 00:34:24,200 Speaker 1: makes me. That's the thing that's made me really weepy. 690 00:34:24,480 --> 00:34:27,360 Speaker 1: I think like I literally if someone and this is 691 00:34:27,400 --> 00:34:30,560 Speaker 1: of course like my busy season with tired to oh, 692 00:34:30,719 --> 00:34:33,520 Speaker 1: I didn't even think about that. I've been really tired, 693 00:34:34,280 --> 00:34:35,680 Speaker 1: but I thought it was just because I've been working 694 00:34:35,719 --> 00:34:37,960 Speaker 1: so much. Every think about it on it but okay, 695 00:34:37,960 --> 00:34:42,400 Speaker 1: so makes sense. We be maybe a little irritable. Um, 696 00:34:42,560 --> 00:34:47,240 Speaker 1: and then yeah, I start shots December six, two weeks 697 00:34:47,239 --> 00:34:49,600 Speaker 1: of shots, two weeks shots. I feel like it might 698 00:34:49,680 --> 00:34:52,360 Speaker 1: be a crazy person in the belly, I think, so. Yeah. 699 00:34:52,880 --> 00:34:54,759 Speaker 1: And then you go in and they were saying of 700 00:34:54,760 --> 00:34:57,279 Speaker 1: the eggs, whatever they can get. Yeah, so you go under. 701 00:34:59,080 --> 00:35:01,799 Speaker 1: Just stay so pos if. Yeah, I'm trying to do 702 00:35:01,960 --> 00:35:04,279 Speaker 1: so great and it's going to be so worth it. 703 00:35:04,400 --> 00:35:07,920 Speaker 1: And I always think when you feel called to do something, 704 00:35:08,600 --> 00:35:10,640 Speaker 1: it's the right thing, the right thing. It's like the truth. 705 00:35:10,960 --> 00:35:13,279 Speaker 1: It's just that peaceful, like I know this is what 706 00:35:13,320 --> 00:35:14,960 Speaker 1: I'm supposed to be doing, and now that it kind 707 00:35:14,960 --> 00:35:17,400 Speaker 1: of sucks, I'm sort of like, but it feels like 708 00:35:17,480 --> 00:35:19,239 Speaker 1: even though it sucks, it feels right. Yeah, and you're 709 00:35:19,280 --> 00:35:21,319 Speaker 1: just like, this is a season and you just do it. 710 00:35:21,480 --> 00:35:23,759 Speaker 1: And that helps me to hear about Sonny and like 711 00:35:24,200 --> 00:35:27,799 Speaker 1: you appreciating it, because I understand that you will appreciate 712 00:35:27,960 --> 00:35:30,880 Speaker 1: your journey because you've had to go through a lot, 713 00:35:30,920 --> 00:35:33,719 Speaker 1: and it's thoughtful, like you really had to think about 714 00:35:33,880 --> 00:35:36,839 Speaker 1: what you wanted and how you know, like how far 715 00:35:37,000 --> 00:35:38,799 Speaker 1: you were willing to go to get it. I really 716 00:35:38,880 --> 00:35:42,719 Speaker 1: think that that makes it even greater. Probably, I think so. 717 00:35:42,920 --> 00:35:46,439 Speaker 1: I think honestly, anything that can give you appreciation of life, 718 00:35:46,680 --> 00:35:50,880 Speaker 1: and I've realized a lot of times appreciation comes from 719 00:35:50,960 --> 00:35:54,520 Speaker 1: the hard pain on the front end, you know, and 720 00:35:55,200 --> 00:35:59,280 Speaker 1: it sucks while you're going through it, and like I'm hormonal, 721 00:35:59,320 --> 00:36:01,400 Speaker 1: your hormonal, so mean we're just gonna maybe try again, 722 00:36:01,800 --> 00:36:05,640 Speaker 1: but like but like it sucks, like having to go 723 00:36:05,760 --> 00:36:09,080 Speaker 1: through it, and it hurts your heart and sometimes it 724 00:36:09,120 --> 00:36:20,160 Speaker 1: breaks your heart. We're literally best stopping just like you 725 00:36:20,239 --> 00:36:23,200 Speaker 1: can break your heart, but to get your heart broke 726 00:36:23,320 --> 00:36:26,640 Speaker 1: open because you want something and you have so much 727 00:36:26,719 --> 00:36:28,799 Speaker 1: love in your heart for something that you don't even 728 00:36:28,800 --> 00:36:32,480 Speaker 1: know exist yet, like a child and a partner and 729 00:36:32,600 --> 00:36:34,759 Speaker 1: all that. It's like you're willing to go through all 730 00:36:34,800 --> 00:36:37,960 Speaker 1: this because you have this big spot in your heart 731 00:36:38,000 --> 00:36:40,120 Speaker 1: for it and you know that you want it so 732 00:36:40,239 --> 00:36:42,920 Speaker 1: much that it just like when you do get it, 733 00:36:42,960 --> 00:36:46,480 Speaker 1: however it comes. Because I believe that God will not 734 00:36:46,520 --> 00:36:48,120 Speaker 1: put that desire on a heart if it's not going 735 00:36:48,160 --> 00:36:49,920 Speaker 1: to come. So even if it ends up where you 736 00:36:50,000 --> 00:36:53,640 Speaker 1: adopt kids or how are your children, or however your 737 00:36:53,680 --> 00:36:58,440 Speaker 1: family comes to you, I believe that wanting, having this 738 00:36:58,640 --> 00:37:01,160 Speaker 1: strong desire and going through through the fire for it, 739 00:37:01,600 --> 00:37:04,400 Speaker 1: you do like your love is so big and you 740 00:37:04,400 --> 00:37:07,040 Speaker 1: have such an appreciation that you wouldn't have had otherwise. 741 00:37:07,160 --> 00:37:09,520 Speaker 1: I think I did too, and I think that was 742 00:37:09,719 --> 00:37:11,960 Speaker 1: for me, like why I ended up just saying, Okay, 743 00:37:12,000 --> 00:37:14,000 Speaker 1: I just gotta try this egg thing because even if 744 00:37:14,520 --> 00:37:16,359 Speaker 1: I don't get a ton, or even if it's not 745 00:37:16,640 --> 00:37:19,319 Speaker 1: exactly the outcome that I want, I knew that I 746 00:37:19,320 --> 00:37:21,680 Speaker 1: had to try every avenue to have that piece of 747 00:37:21,760 --> 00:37:26,320 Speaker 1: like I tried, and so maybe there is another route 748 00:37:26,360 --> 00:37:28,279 Speaker 1: for me. Maybe it is adoption, maybe I'll be a 749 00:37:28,280 --> 00:37:31,680 Speaker 1: step mom, you know, like whatever it is. But I 750 00:37:31,760 --> 00:37:33,680 Speaker 1: do know that for me, it was like I have 751 00:37:33,760 --> 00:37:36,120 Speaker 1: to cross off, you know, the things on the list 752 00:37:36,160 --> 00:37:39,239 Speaker 1: to know that I did all my part and then 753 00:37:39,280 --> 00:37:41,520 Speaker 1: we'll see what the universe as in store. Well, you're 754 00:37:41,560 --> 00:37:43,680 Speaker 1: not the one who have asses life, So you don't. 755 00:37:44,080 --> 00:37:45,880 Speaker 1: You're like, you're not going to take a shortcut, and 756 00:37:45,920 --> 00:37:48,600 Speaker 1: you got point in your life where you're like, Okay, 757 00:37:48,760 --> 00:37:52,160 Speaker 1: I've hit this time period in this like line where 758 00:37:52,160 --> 00:37:55,160 Speaker 1: I either I'm gonna do this reason out thing or 759 00:37:55,160 --> 00:37:58,160 Speaker 1: I'm gonna miss this chance totally. You can't do it forever. 760 00:37:58,440 --> 00:38:01,080 Speaker 1: So you did it. And I love that about you, Kelly, 761 00:38:01,200 --> 00:38:04,640 Speaker 1: because we're like, I'm going for and whatever happens happens. Yeah, 762 00:38:06,680 --> 00:38:09,160 Speaker 1: that's so exciting. I love how you turn this into 763 00:38:09,200 --> 00:38:13,160 Speaker 1: a podcast interview for me. Speaking of that, let's talk 764 00:38:13,160 --> 00:38:15,080 Speaker 1: about the Get Real podcast, because this is what you 765 00:38:15,160 --> 00:38:17,840 Speaker 1: do on your podcast. Everything is based on you just 766 00:38:17,880 --> 00:38:20,560 Speaker 1: want the real conversations with people, right, So tell us 767 00:38:20,560 --> 00:38:23,320 Speaker 1: a little bit about Get Real. I think it started 768 00:38:23,360 --> 00:38:29,359 Speaker 1: because I, um, I like, I struggled with self worth 769 00:38:29,360 --> 00:38:31,680 Speaker 1: a lot, and I think a lot of people probably do. 770 00:38:32,320 --> 00:38:34,680 Speaker 1: But I struggled to self worth a lot in my twenties, 771 00:38:34,800 --> 00:38:39,359 Speaker 1: and I was looking for validation and just I think 772 00:38:39,400 --> 00:38:42,719 Speaker 1: that I always thought other people had life figured out 773 00:38:42,760 --> 00:38:46,719 Speaker 1: maybe more than I did, and that people there were 774 00:38:46,760 --> 00:38:50,040 Speaker 1: like special people that like we're just they just had 775 00:38:50,239 --> 00:38:53,279 Speaker 1: they just had like this like very magic wand that 776 00:38:53,360 --> 00:38:56,879 Speaker 1: had been placed on their lives and everything's perfect. And 777 00:38:57,320 --> 00:38:59,280 Speaker 1: I think that's why I wanted to get an entertainment industry, 778 00:38:59,280 --> 00:39:01,960 Speaker 1: because I'm like, oh, that where all the special people are, 779 00:39:02,040 --> 00:39:05,160 Speaker 1: and that's where life is perfect. You know, it's just 780 00:39:05,640 --> 00:39:12,560 Speaker 1: not true that it's completely effed up those we're all 781 00:39:12,840 --> 00:39:16,960 Speaker 1: like just looking for something. There's amazing people here. Actually, 782 00:39:17,000 --> 00:39:19,800 Speaker 1: I think everyone in the entertainment industry is beautiful souls. 783 00:39:20,840 --> 00:39:27,160 Speaker 1: But um, I started interviewing people and I got to 784 00:39:27,160 --> 00:39:29,719 Speaker 1: know people's stories. And when you interview people, you get 785 00:39:29,719 --> 00:39:31,720 Speaker 1: to ask all the questions that you have ever wanted 786 00:39:31,760 --> 00:39:33,600 Speaker 1: to know. And you're not a total creep for doing right. 787 00:39:34,280 --> 00:39:39,239 Speaker 1: You know, you're awarded for your curiosity exactly because like, 788 00:39:39,280 --> 00:39:41,239 Speaker 1: all of a sudden, I've had all these questions. My hall, 789 00:39:41,280 --> 00:39:43,759 Speaker 1: there's a fly that is just circulating. I mean, it 790 00:39:43,880 --> 00:39:46,920 Speaker 1: isn't wanting to hang out so hard. Um, it's probably 791 00:39:46,920 --> 00:39:49,640 Speaker 1: trying to comfort us. Let me give you a hug 792 00:39:49,680 --> 00:39:56,680 Speaker 1: full of maggots. Um. So I started interviewing all these 793 00:39:56,680 --> 00:40:01,200 Speaker 1: people that I thought were so just perfect, and they 794 00:40:01,239 --> 00:40:04,319 Speaker 1: started sharing their life and their journey and just what 795 00:40:04,400 --> 00:40:06,560 Speaker 1: you said, you've realized that everyone that you've interview just 796 00:40:06,600 --> 00:40:08,799 Speaker 1: had like a breaking point or like a totally a 797 00:40:08,880 --> 00:40:12,920 Speaker 1: moment where everything's falling apart. And I just started realizing that, 798 00:40:13,239 --> 00:40:17,120 Speaker 1: oh my gosh, like everyone is like this. Everyone has 799 00:40:17,760 --> 00:40:20,520 Speaker 1: major highs and major lows, everyone has insecurities they've had 800 00:40:20,520 --> 00:40:23,680 Speaker 1: to overcome, everyone has like major failures, and like, I 801 00:40:23,880 --> 00:40:27,040 Speaker 1: started realizing I didn't have to be afraid of not 802 00:40:27,160 --> 00:40:31,239 Speaker 1: being perfect, you know, and it was freeing and it 803 00:40:31,360 --> 00:40:34,120 Speaker 1: just allowed me to actually start being way more real 804 00:40:34,760 --> 00:40:38,200 Speaker 1: and share myself even more than ever because I had 805 00:40:38,200 --> 00:40:41,600 Speaker 1: the opportunity doing all these interviews to really get personal 806 00:40:41,600 --> 00:40:43,600 Speaker 1: and get to know people on a deep level and 807 00:40:43,760 --> 00:40:47,279 Speaker 1: see that everyone is going through struggles and everyone has 808 00:40:47,320 --> 00:40:49,279 Speaker 1: things they've had to overcome and no one has it 809 00:40:49,360 --> 00:40:51,680 Speaker 1: figured out, and no one has it figured out. So 810 00:40:51,719 --> 00:40:56,160 Speaker 1: it's given me just like total release to be completely 811 00:40:56,200 --> 00:41:01,520 Speaker 1: honest with everything. And I'm pretty much fine with almost 812 00:41:01,520 --> 00:41:05,560 Speaker 1: pretty much anything because I'm like, everyone is going through this, 813 00:41:05,800 --> 00:41:07,880 Speaker 1: everyone is going through personal things, Like I'm not going 814 00:41:07,960 --> 00:41:10,279 Speaker 1: to try to be perfect because no one is. And 815 00:41:10,360 --> 00:41:13,480 Speaker 1: that's not what helped me. Is hearing a perfect person 816 00:41:14,440 --> 00:41:17,560 Speaker 1: a facade. I want to hear the truth because I 817 00:41:17,640 --> 00:41:18,880 Speaker 1: want to I want to know that we're all in 818 00:41:18,920 --> 00:41:20,479 Speaker 1: this together, and then I'm not the only one who's 819 00:41:20,520 --> 00:41:23,400 Speaker 1: a total nut job. It's the connecting piece, like you 820 00:41:23,440 --> 00:41:26,280 Speaker 1: talked about earlier when you traveled. It's just like hearing 821 00:41:26,320 --> 00:41:29,640 Speaker 1: people's stories. That's for me when I'm like, oh my god, 822 00:41:29,680 --> 00:41:32,200 Speaker 1: even what you just said, I struggle with the same 823 00:41:32,200 --> 00:41:33,480 Speaker 1: thing I said. Here, I look at you and I'm like, 824 00:41:33,480 --> 00:41:35,759 Speaker 1: you're a beautiful girl. How did you ever struggle with 825 00:41:35,800 --> 00:41:38,960 Speaker 1: self worth? You know? Huge? I mean I still struggle 826 00:41:39,160 --> 00:41:41,719 Speaker 1: to the same And people think you just if you 827 00:41:41,840 --> 00:41:45,400 Speaker 1: are like working a lot or posting pretty pictures on Instagram, 828 00:41:45,440 --> 00:41:47,680 Speaker 1: that you don't have those struggles, and it's just not true. 829 00:41:47,920 --> 00:41:49,520 Speaker 1: But it helps me to hear that I'm not the 830 00:41:49,560 --> 00:41:53,520 Speaker 1: only one. You know. Yeah, what have you learned from 831 00:41:53,520 --> 00:41:56,840 Speaker 1: interviewing people? Um, just how much I like to connect 832 00:41:56,880 --> 00:41:59,080 Speaker 1: with people. I didn't really know that about myself. Like 833 00:41:59,120 --> 00:42:02,640 Speaker 1: I think I've done it my whole life, just you know, 834 00:42:02,680 --> 00:42:05,120 Speaker 1: even being like in the hair and makeup and styling world. 835 00:42:05,160 --> 00:42:06,640 Speaker 1: That's what I do with my clients, and I think 836 00:42:06,680 --> 00:42:08,160 Speaker 1: that's why I've been with all my clients for as 837 00:42:08,200 --> 00:42:12,400 Speaker 1: many years as I have, um, but I didn't realize 838 00:42:12,520 --> 00:42:15,400 Speaker 1: That's what I was just loving about that job, you know, 839 00:42:15,440 --> 00:42:17,920 Speaker 1: because I get to be so one on one with them. 840 00:42:18,000 --> 00:42:20,359 Speaker 1: And then for me, it started on very cavaliery because 841 00:42:20,400 --> 00:42:24,319 Speaker 1: when I started talking about being cheated on or even 842 00:42:24,400 --> 00:42:27,760 Speaker 1: hard to put that on nationally, I mean because also 843 00:42:27,880 --> 00:42:31,919 Speaker 1: it's like I guess it was still sort of embarrassing 844 00:42:31,960 --> 00:42:34,640 Speaker 1: to me, Like I didn't really realize that, but I 845 00:42:34,640 --> 00:42:37,560 Speaker 1: had canceled a wedding and done these things that I 846 00:42:37,600 --> 00:42:41,080 Speaker 1: didn't really advertise to people. You know, it's sort of 847 00:42:41,280 --> 00:42:43,520 Speaker 1: maybe we're going to get married. It was three months 848 00:42:43,520 --> 00:42:46,360 Speaker 1: from my wedding. You canceled a wedding because you just 849 00:42:46,560 --> 00:42:48,880 Speaker 1: felt like it was the wrong because you cheated. And 850 00:42:48,920 --> 00:42:51,480 Speaker 1: I was like, I can't start a marriage that way. 851 00:42:51,600 --> 00:42:53,279 Speaker 1: I don't know if we'll be together or not. But 852 00:42:53,600 --> 00:42:56,480 Speaker 1: you had that. I watched season one. This is the 853 00:42:56,520 --> 00:42:59,759 Speaker 1: season two. Okay, I actually really love that show. I 854 00:42:59,760 --> 00:43:02,440 Speaker 1: think because there's there's a season three yet you are 855 00:43:02,480 --> 00:43:06,600 Speaker 1: still it's still happening. Yeah, there's there's still it's still filming. 856 00:43:06,680 --> 00:43:09,799 Speaker 1: But um so, yeah, like you put that on the 857 00:43:09,800 --> 00:43:12,000 Speaker 1: show one season two, we taught we had to talk 858 00:43:12,000 --> 00:43:14,600 Speaker 1: about it. Because people were like why are you single? 859 00:43:14,840 --> 00:43:17,400 Speaker 1: Like why? And for me, the dating journey has just 860 00:43:17,440 --> 00:43:20,759 Speaker 1: been really hard after that, like I've taken I had 861 00:43:20,760 --> 00:43:22,520 Speaker 1: to take a lot of time off of dating. That's 862 00:43:22,520 --> 00:43:25,720 Speaker 1: when I started my world therapy. Oh yeah, major test 863 00:43:25,800 --> 00:43:29,800 Speaker 1: issues and just like really looking into why I was 864 00:43:29,840 --> 00:43:32,080 Speaker 1: getting in the relationships I was getting into probably like 865 00:43:32,200 --> 00:43:35,600 Speaker 1: really hits that self worth button? Why did this happen 866 00:43:35,640 --> 00:43:39,600 Speaker 1: to you? Exactly? There's nothing wrong with you. It had 867 00:43:39,640 --> 00:43:41,879 Speaker 1: nothing to do with me. That's what I know now. 868 00:43:42,080 --> 00:43:43,960 Speaker 1: But that took me a lot of years to get 869 00:43:44,040 --> 00:43:47,439 Speaker 1: to And so there was that and then just talking 870 00:43:47,440 --> 00:43:49,759 Speaker 1: about the egg stuff and what that did for me 871 00:43:49,800 --> 00:43:52,759 Speaker 1: though was being honest. Like you said, it made me 872 00:43:52,800 --> 00:43:56,520 Speaker 1: realize when people would message me or you know, reach out, 873 00:43:56,560 --> 00:43:58,040 Speaker 1: or when I run into people in the street and 874 00:43:58,040 --> 00:43:59,719 Speaker 1: they say thank you so much for talking about that, 875 00:43:59,800 --> 00:44:02,560 Speaker 1: I'm going through the same thing. Or it's so nice 876 00:44:02,600 --> 00:44:06,040 Speaker 1: to see a girl who I view as successful and 877 00:44:06,239 --> 00:44:09,680 Speaker 1: whatever together. Yeah to hear that you're you know, you 878 00:44:09,719 --> 00:44:11,880 Speaker 1: have the same struggles as me. Like that was. I 879 00:44:11,960 --> 00:44:13,920 Speaker 1: just loved that. And so that's what I've kind of 880 00:44:13,960 --> 00:44:16,600 Speaker 1: put into my podcast is just like you said, the 881 00:44:16,600 --> 00:44:19,880 Speaker 1: curiosity stuff, but also just connecting And isn't that like 882 00:44:20,040 --> 00:44:22,920 Speaker 1: such a wonderful turning point to get too Because I 883 00:44:22,960 --> 00:44:25,960 Speaker 1: feel like for a long time, I wanted to have 884 00:44:26,000 --> 00:44:27,800 Speaker 1: a perfect image. I wanted people to think I was 885 00:44:27,840 --> 00:44:30,319 Speaker 1: put together. I wanted everyone to think that I was 886 00:44:30,400 --> 00:44:35,040 Speaker 1: like all awesome, because I was hurting inside and I 887 00:44:35,080 --> 00:44:37,080 Speaker 1: didn't want anyone to see that hurt. So I was like, 888 00:44:37,200 --> 00:44:39,760 Speaker 1: I'm going to keep this all like looking so good, 889 00:44:40,320 --> 00:44:44,240 Speaker 1: I'm so busy, like everything's awesome. And then like, exactly 890 00:44:44,280 --> 00:44:47,160 Speaker 1: what you said doing this podcast, getting to be vulnerable, 891 00:44:47,239 --> 00:44:50,640 Speaker 1: having people be vulnerable with me, and realizing that that 892 00:44:50,840 --> 00:44:54,360 Speaker 1: is really where the impact is is being real and 893 00:44:54,520 --> 00:44:57,000 Speaker 1: seeing the response of people on social media. It's like 894 00:44:57,160 --> 00:45:00,760 Speaker 1: turned my social media into a wonderful thing. Whereas before 895 00:45:00,920 --> 00:45:03,759 Speaker 1: social media can it can be a compare trap, like 896 00:45:03,800 --> 00:45:06,960 Speaker 1: you can fall through and compare yourself. I still have 897 00:45:07,000 --> 00:45:09,799 Speaker 1: to take breaks sometimes. Yeah, because I do that, I'll 898 00:45:09,800 --> 00:45:12,440 Speaker 1: start and you just forget this is people's best foot 899 00:45:12,520 --> 00:45:16,000 Speaker 1: You can't. It's not high life, highly real. But I 900 00:45:16,040 --> 00:45:19,480 Speaker 1: feel like being able to share real stuff has really 901 00:45:19,640 --> 00:45:23,400 Speaker 1: helped me view social media in a different way because 902 00:45:23,960 --> 00:45:27,439 Speaker 1: I'll get tons of messages from women who are saying 903 00:45:27,480 --> 00:45:29,600 Speaker 1: the same thing, like, thank you so much for talking 904 00:45:29,600 --> 00:45:31,560 Speaker 1: about that in your podcast, thank you so much for 905 00:45:31,600 --> 00:45:33,879 Speaker 1: sharing about that, because I'm struggling with the same thing, 906 00:45:33,880 --> 00:45:35,719 Speaker 1: and I'm like, this is where it's at, this is 907 00:45:35,719 --> 00:45:38,000 Speaker 1: how we use this for good and now do you 908 00:45:38,040 --> 00:45:40,400 Speaker 1: feel this way? But I feel like I have. I 909 00:45:40,440 --> 00:45:42,239 Speaker 1: don't want people to think I have a perfect life 910 00:45:42,280 --> 00:45:45,600 Speaker 1: because it's fake, like fake, that's just not real. That's 911 00:45:45,600 --> 00:45:47,759 Speaker 1: not who I even. I mean, I think I still 912 00:45:47,760 --> 00:45:49,560 Speaker 1: struggle with it, but it's not who I want to 913 00:45:49,560 --> 00:45:52,080 Speaker 1: portray myself to be because I'm like, that's not a 914 00:45:52,120 --> 00:45:55,520 Speaker 1: real person and that's not me exactly. So let's just 915 00:45:55,560 --> 00:45:57,759 Speaker 1: talk about the real ship. That's how I feel a 916 00:45:57,880 --> 00:46:01,440 Speaker 1: men's sister reach all day long. Well, so you can 917 00:46:01,440 --> 00:46:05,000 Speaker 1: hear a lot of real ship on Caroline's podcast Get Real, 918 00:46:05,080 --> 00:46:07,279 Speaker 1: and you mostly interview I think you feel like you're 919 00:46:07,280 --> 00:46:10,040 Speaker 1: branching out now, but it started with the wives of 920 00:46:10,080 --> 00:46:12,759 Speaker 1: country musicians because that's something you can totally relate to. 921 00:46:13,400 --> 00:46:15,800 Speaker 1: What do you find, like, what's the common denominator amongst 922 00:46:15,840 --> 00:46:21,239 Speaker 1: all of the wives? I feel? Well? I do think 923 00:46:21,239 --> 00:46:23,880 Speaker 1: this is another reason why social media is great is 924 00:46:23,920 --> 00:46:29,319 Speaker 1: because before social media, the wives of stars were just 925 00:46:29,600 --> 00:46:32,080 Speaker 1: more photographed with them and you didn't really get to 926 00:46:32,160 --> 00:46:34,239 Speaker 1: know who they were, you know, like they didn't have 927 00:46:34,640 --> 00:46:40,480 Speaker 1: an opportunity to let their personality, their interests, their desires, 928 00:46:40,560 --> 00:46:44,040 Speaker 1: their passions be known as much. I mean, still they could, 929 00:46:44,080 --> 00:46:46,080 Speaker 1: but it wasn't just s scene, you know, because it 930 00:46:46,080 --> 00:46:48,640 Speaker 1: would be more just like their famous husband and then 931 00:46:48,800 --> 00:46:52,960 Speaker 1: they the wife of x y Z. Yeah. But now 932 00:46:53,000 --> 00:46:56,040 Speaker 1: with Instagram, I feel like all these women and anyone 933 00:46:56,120 --> 00:46:59,200 Speaker 1: in general, can have their own platform and use it 934 00:46:59,239 --> 00:47:01,759 Speaker 1: for their own messages and whatever they want to put 935 00:47:01,760 --> 00:47:03,399 Speaker 1: out there. And I just feel like every single one 936 00:47:03,400 --> 00:47:07,840 Speaker 1: of these wives a has beautiful hearts and they really 937 00:47:07,880 --> 00:47:13,680 Speaker 1: want to use their lives to create, to better the world, 938 00:47:13,840 --> 00:47:18,719 Speaker 1: to just spread love. They're all wonderful women, like whether 939 00:47:18,760 --> 00:47:22,439 Speaker 1: it's rescuing animals, whether it's like starting clothing company, whether 940 00:47:22,520 --> 00:47:27,839 Speaker 1: it's like volunteering and helping children, like it's they all 941 00:47:27,880 --> 00:47:31,120 Speaker 1: are doing something great with their lives. And I feel 942 00:47:31,120 --> 00:47:33,480 Speaker 1: like it's been so interesting to hear that story. And 943 00:47:33,520 --> 00:47:36,200 Speaker 1: also they've all had struggles, Like every single one of 944 00:47:36,239 --> 00:47:39,040 Speaker 1: them has struggles and they've had to like deal with 945 00:47:39,120 --> 00:47:41,759 Speaker 1: so much in their own lives, and I just I 946 00:47:41,800 --> 00:47:45,719 Speaker 1: feel like it's just their perspective is so fascinating. It's 947 00:47:45,760 --> 00:47:50,120 Speaker 1: so interesting because truly, the woman standing by a man, 948 00:47:50,520 --> 00:47:53,439 Speaker 1: whoever the man is married to, that woman is such 949 00:47:53,480 --> 00:47:56,839 Speaker 1: a powerful person in his life. That is the most 950 00:47:56,880 --> 00:47:59,640 Speaker 1: important person in that man's life. And so that's who 951 00:47:59,640 --> 00:48:01,560 Speaker 1: he's and sleep with every night. That's who he's telling 952 00:48:01,560 --> 00:48:03,960 Speaker 1: all his deeper spheres too, That's who he's bouncing ideas 953 00:48:04,000 --> 00:48:08,080 Speaker 1: off of. That woman is amazing, and she's influencing him 954 00:48:08,120 --> 00:48:09,920 Speaker 1: so much, and it's like, who is she? What is 955 00:48:10,280 --> 00:48:12,480 Speaker 1: her background? And so just getting to know all these 956 00:48:12,480 --> 00:48:14,440 Speaker 1: wives has been amazing, and I think people are interested. 957 00:48:14,719 --> 00:48:16,879 Speaker 1: I totally think people are interested. And I think it's 958 00:48:16,960 --> 00:48:19,719 Speaker 1: cool because just like you said, you always just looked 959 00:48:19,719 --> 00:48:22,560 Speaker 1: at like, oh, the wife of so and so. But 960 00:48:23,360 --> 00:48:26,359 Speaker 1: like what you said about their such strong women. I mean, 961 00:48:26,400 --> 00:48:29,080 Speaker 1: I don't think maybe it's because we see this, but 962 00:48:29,400 --> 00:48:32,120 Speaker 1: I'm not sure that everyone understands what it takes to 963 00:48:32,239 --> 00:48:35,320 Speaker 1: be the wife of someone either so famous or so 964 00:48:35,560 --> 00:48:39,400 Speaker 1: um successful and busy. Yes, like that is a hard 965 00:48:39,760 --> 00:48:44,239 Speaker 1: job to keep everything running amongst a career like that. 966 00:48:44,440 --> 00:48:46,359 Speaker 1: You know, I have all the respect in the world 967 00:48:46,520 --> 00:48:49,000 Speaker 1: as a really cool thing happening in country music in 968 00:48:49,040 --> 00:48:51,799 Speaker 1: particular right now. I can't see for other genres, but 969 00:48:52,320 --> 00:48:55,840 Speaker 1: something about what's happening right now is being married and 970 00:48:55,920 --> 00:48:59,759 Speaker 1: having a family is super cool. Yeah, that's definitely happening. Yeah, 971 00:48:59,840 --> 00:49:03,680 Speaker 1: you know, it's like something and awesome young. Yeah. I 972 00:49:03,719 --> 00:49:05,720 Speaker 1: work with all the land Coo guys. They're all married 973 00:49:05,800 --> 00:49:08,920 Speaker 1: and proud to be married. Totally. It's not like back 974 00:49:08,960 --> 00:49:10,239 Speaker 1: in the day, like you didn't want to act like 975 00:49:10,280 --> 00:49:12,160 Speaker 1: you're married because you gotta have this like rock star 976 00:49:12,239 --> 00:49:15,319 Speaker 1: personel and like be single for the chicks. But it's 977 00:49:15,360 --> 00:49:17,840 Speaker 1: just not that vibe. And maybe it's with like the 978 00:49:18,800 --> 00:49:23,440 Speaker 1: the environment of the world, like the how women empowerment 979 00:49:23,440 --> 00:49:26,399 Speaker 1: movements and happening so much lately, and like I don't know, 980 00:49:26,520 --> 00:49:28,040 Speaker 1: I don't know what it is, but I just feel 981 00:49:28,080 --> 00:49:31,160 Speaker 1: like being married and respecting your partner is such a 982 00:49:31,200 --> 00:49:34,000 Speaker 1: cool thing. Doesn't that make a man so much sexier? 983 00:49:34,080 --> 00:49:37,000 Speaker 1: So much? I think it's just so much sexier because 984 00:49:37,000 --> 00:49:40,879 Speaker 1: you're like, you're talented, you're hot, and you actually love 985 00:49:40,920 --> 00:49:44,239 Speaker 1: your wife and you want to stand by her and 986 00:49:44,360 --> 00:49:46,239 Speaker 1: like show her off in all the ways. Like the 987 00:49:46,280 --> 00:49:51,520 Speaker 1: playboys not cute because carried to that nobody. I mean, 988 00:49:51,640 --> 00:49:55,080 Speaker 1: so you so you're a playboy and some girl you have, 989 00:49:55,200 --> 00:49:56,960 Speaker 1: like a hook up. You get them for one night, 990 00:49:57,960 --> 00:50:00,400 Speaker 1: they have the next night, and you're just left empty 991 00:50:00,520 --> 00:50:03,680 Speaker 1: like that's still any anything. And then that guy he's 992 00:50:03,680 --> 00:50:05,440 Speaker 1: not going to commit to you. He doesn't want to 993 00:50:05,440 --> 00:50:06,839 Speaker 1: be with you, don't want to be That's not who 994 00:50:06,920 --> 00:50:10,480 Speaker 1: that's not the goal. I love that. Well, you can 995 00:50:10,520 --> 00:50:13,759 Speaker 1: hear these stories and more on the Get Real podcast. 996 00:50:14,000 --> 00:50:17,400 Speaker 1: Where else can people find you? Um? Instagram, Carol Hobby 997 00:50:17,480 --> 00:50:25,040 Speaker 1: c A R O H O B B Y. And 998 00:50:25,080 --> 00:50:27,799 Speaker 1: then also, you have a website, right, Oh? I do? 999 00:50:27,880 --> 00:50:30,200 Speaker 1: I need to do things with it. I always that way. 1000 00:50:30,239 --> 00:50:32,160 Speaker 1: I'm always like I'm updating my website. I'm in a 1001 00:50:32,239 --> 00:50:35,120 Speaker 1: constant state of updating my webs I used to try 1002 00:50:35,120 --> 00:50:37,800 Speaker 1: to keep it up, but now I'm like, how do 1003 00:50:37,880 --> 00:50:40,160 Speaker 1: I get I need? I need an assistant? Yeah, you 1004 00:50:40,160 --> 00:50:42,560 Speaker 1: gotta get an assist. What's the one? This is my goal? Okay? 1005 00:50:42,600 --> 00:50:45,719 Speaker 1: Anyone listening? He wants to be an intern? Okay, are 1006 00:50:45,760 --> 00:50:48,920 Speaker 1: amazing already find one? Well? I got one at Bouma, 1007 00:50:49,120 --> 00:50:51,799 Speaker 1: but yeah, can you teach me how one? I need 1008 00:50:51,880 --> 00:50:54,560 Speaker 1: to put your ad out let's do this someone who 1009 00:50:54,680 --> 00:50:57,640 Speaker 1: knows how to do videos and can like shoot some 1010 00:50:57,719 --> 00:50:59,360 Speaker 1: YouTube stuff, because I would like to just do a 1011 00:50:59,400 --> 00:51:01,080 Speaker 1: little bit of you to all the young kids can 1012 00:51:01,120 --> 00:51:03,040 Speaker 1: do these things, these says, by the way, in their sleep, 1013 00:51:03,239 --> 00:51:05,799 Speaker 1: they it's like I feel like another that's another place 1014 00:51:05,840 --> 00:51:08,319 Speaker 1: of like a dumbass. It's like nothing to them. I'm 1015 00:51:08,320 --> 00:51:10,919 Speaker 1: like dial up internet over here. They're like over there 1016 00:51:11,160 --> 00:51:14,880 Speaker 1: like just yes, yeah, So you need someone to do 1017 00:51:15,080 --> 00:51:17,800 Speaker 1: videos YouTube. I want to do like little YouTube videos 1018 00:51:18,680 --> 00:51:23,799 Speaker 1: and then um, I would blog. I can put blogs up. 1019 00:51:23,800 --> 00:51:25,080 Speaker 1: I just don't do it like if I could have 1020 00:51:25,120 --> 00:51:27,040 Speaker 1: an intern who could just like all write the blog, 1021 00:51:27,080 --> 00:51:29,560 Speaker 1: if they could post it and then help me get 1022 00:51:29,560 --> 00:51:33,960 Speaker 1: a little YouTube videos edited and then really that's it, 1023 00:51:34,040 --> 00:51:37,840 Speaker 1: and then help me link my podcast to my website. 1024 00:51:38,080 --> 00:51:44,920 Speaker 1: So email you at Caroline Hobby dot com. Okay, we 1025 00:51:45,040 --> 00:51:48,400 Speaker 1: just did your h B B y wait at gmail 1026 00:51:48,480 --> 00:51:51,440 Speaker 1: dot com, at gmail at mind hobby at gmail dot 1027 00:51:51,480 --> 00:51:53,880 Speaker 1: com if you want to be my intern and do 1028 00:51:54,000 --> 00:51:55,759 Speaker 1: I'm talking like one day a week. I got a baby, 1029 00:51:55,840 --> 00:51:59,239 Speaker 1: so we got like a two hour window. Okay, I'm 1030 00:51:59,280 --> 00:52:02,319 Speaker 1: not talking like much, and I'll help you however you want. 1031 00:52:02,320 --> 00:52:03,759 Speaker 1: I don't know what you're supposed to do. How you 1032 00:52:04,160 --> 00:52:06,719 Speaker 1: what's the trade? You just like sign for me? It 1033 00:52:06,840 --> 00:52:09,000 Speaker 1: was fill out this paperwork and then sign off that 1034 00:52:09,120 --> 00:52:11,680 Speaker 1: they're doing the work. Oh yeah, so they need credit. 1035 00:52:11,880 --> 00:52:14,840 Speaker 1: My intern actually works for me now because she was 1036 00:52:14,920 --> 00:52:17,160 Speaker 1: so awesome. So it can be the start of a 1037 00:52:17,200 --> 00:52:21,400 Speaker 1: great relationship. Okay, guys, I'm super cold. Yeah, yeah she is. 1038 00:52:21,480 --> 00:52:24,040 Speaker 1: You would be a fun boss. I mean maybe we'll 1039 00:52:24,040 --> 00:52:28,080 Speaker 1: cut back on the tears cry. We'll work on that part. 1040 00:52:28,200 --> 00:52:29,760 Speaker 1: I need to go get her who can like hustle 1041 00:52:29,760 --> 00:52:31,560 Speaker 1: and get stiff done mass because I'm not trying to 1042 00:52:31,600 --> 00:52:32,960 Speaker 1: spend all day doing this. I'll give you all the 1043 00:52:33,000 --> 00:52:35,440 Speaker 1: credit you need. You need, like a million hours, I'll 1044 00:52:35,440 --> 00:52:37,040 Speaker 1: say you did it. You don't have to come over 1045 00:52:37,120 --> 00:52:39,520 Speaker 1: for don't tell your teacher, as long as we can 1046 00:52:39,560 --> 00:52:42,200 Speaker 1: just knock it out. Okay, Well, so there's a lot 1047 00:52:42,239 --> 00:52:44,480 Speaker 1: of goals here. We're gonna find Caroline an intern. You 1048 00:52:44,560 --> 00:52:46,960 Speaker 1: guys go listen to to get Real podcast and check 1049 00:52:47,000 --> 00:52:50,080 Speaker 1: her out on Instagram at Caro Hobby. Thank you so 1050 00:52:50,200 --> 00:52:52,279 Speaker 1: much for doing this. Oh I just want to keep 1051 00:52:52,320 --> 00:52:55,719 Speaker 1: talking to you. We'll have to do another one. We 1052 00:52:55,800 --> 00:52:58,000 Speaker 1: could just hopefully literally we should do another one and 1053 00:52:58,080 --> 00:53:00,000 Speaker 1: not cry the whole time. Or maybe that's maybe people 1054 00:53:00,000 --> 00:53:02,200 Speaker 1: will be crying with us. I hope everyone got a 1055 00:53:02,239 --> 00:53:04,880 Speaker 1: good purge of tears out today. I'll probably go crown 1056 00:53:04,920 --> 00:53:06,959 Speaker 1: my way home or something. I know. You just gotta 1057 00:53:06,960 --> 00:53:09,320 Speaker 1: get it out, man, dad song and just let it 1058 00:53:09,440 --> 00:53:13,480 Speaker 1: roll with it, Okay, all right, Well thanks for doing 1059 00:53:13,520 --> 00:53:16,840 Speaker 1: this is just fun having me. Thank you guys for listening. 1060 00:53:18,719 --> 00:53:20,960 Speaker 1: This is Kelly Henderson and you've been listening to the 1061 00:53:21,040 --> 00:53:24,640 Speaker 1: Velvet's Edge podcast. I truly believe that every one of 1062 00:53:24,719 --> 00:53:27,239 Speaker 1: us has a little velvet and a little edge, so 1063 00:53:27,400 --> 00:53:29,880 Speaker 1: it's so important to remember that to be strong, you 1064 00:53:30,080 --> 00:53:33,120 Speaker 1: must be soft too. Thank you so much for sharing 1065 00:53:33,160 --> 00:53:35,960 Speaker 1: in those stories with me. You can follow Velvet's Edge 1066 00:53:36,000 --> 00:53:39,160 Speaker 1: on Instagram, Facebook, and Twitter, as well as velvet's Edge 1067 00:53:39,200 --> 00:53:41,680 Speaker 1: dot com. If you have it yet, go to Apple 1068 00:53:41,760 --> 00:53:45,800 Speaker 1: Podcast and subscribe, rate and review this podcast. Join me 1069 00:53:45,920 --> 00:53:50,640 Speaker 1: every Wednesday for more conversations on lifestyle, beauty, and relationships. 1070 00:53:50,880 --> 00:53:51,720 Speaker 1: Thanks for listening.