1 00:00:03,800 --> 00:00:07,600 Speaker 1: When you humanize yourself and you humanize me. Now, I'm 2 00:00:07,640 --> 00:00:10,000 Speaker 1: not just a tool or number to you, were something 3 00:00:10,039 --> 00:00:13,680 Speaker 1: you're using to achieve a goal. Right now, you humanized 4 00:00:13,720 --> 00:00:16,800 Speaker 1: me and made sure that I understand that I am 5 00:00:16,960 --> 00:00:20,000 Speaker 1: more important than whatever we're doing here. I think anybody 6 00:00:20,360 --> 00:00:22,720 Speaker 1: would take that from a leader or a boss and 7 00:00:22,800 --> 00:00:23,360 Speaker 1: run with it. 8 00:00:26,560 --> 00:00:29,600 Speaker 2: This is the Reform Sports Project, a podcast about restoring 9 00:00:29,640 --> 00:00:32,839 Speaker 2: healthy balance and perspective in all areas of sports through 10 00:00:32,960 --> 00:00:36,760 Speaker 2: education and advocacy. Hi, this is Nick Bonacor from the 11 00:00:36,800 --> 00:00:40,720 Speaker 2: Reform Sports Podcast. Today, I'm speaking with retired Sergeant first 12 00:00:40,720 --> 00:00:45,080 Speaker 2: Class Matthew Docchio, a highly respected military veteran and longtime friend. 13 00:00:45,600 --> 00:00:48,760 Speaker 2: Sergeant first Class Dochio spent his entire military career in 14 00:00:48,840 --> 00:00:52,360 Speaker 2: the Army Special Forces Green Beret, earning a number of awards, 15 00:00:52,400 --> 00:00:55,440 Speaker 2: including a Bronze Star and Purple Heart, before retiring in 16 00:00:55,440 --> 00:00:59,200 Speaker 2: twenty eighteen due to injury, sustain and combat. After discovering 17 00:00:59,200 --> 00:01:02,200 Speaker 2: a passion for war working in retirement, Matt founded hard 18 00:01:02,240 --> 00:01:05,920 Speaker 2: Af Designs, a small veteran own business that creates unique, 19 00:01:06,000 --> 00:01:08,959 Speaker 2: hindcrafted home to core pieces. Matt and I discussed why 20 00:01:09,000 --> 00:01:11,840 Speaker 2: some of the best leaders express vulnerability and empathy, the 21 00:01:11,840 --> 00:01:15,600 Speaker 2: importance of teaching children accountability, and why he's decided to 22 00:01:15,640 --> 00:01:18,119 Speaker 2: write a book to help those struggling with mental health, 23 00:01:18,240 --> 00:01:21,280 Speaker 2: self worth, and identity. Man, I'm gonna try not to 24 00:01:21,319 --> 00:01:24,840 Speaker 2: cry on this one. Dude an old friend from my childhood. 25 00:01:25,120 --> 00:01:27,360 Speaker 2: We've kept in touch some over the years. But I mean, 26 00:01:27,400 --> 00:01:29,959 Speaker 2: this man is a He's a freaking hero to all 27 00:01:30,000 --> 00:01:32,760 Speaker 2: of us here in the United States. I'm super pumped 28 00:01:32,760 --> 00:01:34,440 Speaker 2: to have him, super pumped to call him a friend. 29 00:01:34,840 --> 00:01:39,360 Speaker 2: Special Forces Green Beret retired Matt Docchio, Matthew Dochio, doc 30 00:01:39,400 --> 00:01:41,160 Speaker 2: what's up Man? Thanks for hopping on, Bro. 31 00:01:41,280 --> 00:01:43,400 Speaker 1: What's up? Nick? Thanks for having me Man, It's an honor. 32 00:01:43,880 --> 00:01:45,160 Speaker 2: Well, it's an honor to have you. 33 00:01:45,240 --> 00:01:45,399 Speaker 1: Bro. 34 00:01:45,520 --> 00:01:48,240 Speaker 2: And I just got done listening to the podcast Team 35 00:01:48,360 --> 00:01:50,400 Speaker 2: trek Man. You guys spent a lot of time really 36 00:01:50,440 --> 00:01:53,200 Speaker 2: digging in on some really important topics in your history. Man, 37 00:01:53,200 --> 00:01:55,000 Speaker 2: I thought you guys did an awesome job. Anyone who's 38 00:01:55,160 --> 00:01:57,040 Speaker 2: gonna listen to this needs to go check that out. 39 00:01:57,040 --> 00:01:58,800 Speaker 2: But what was it like, Man, getting on the mic 40 00:01:58,880 --> 00:01:59,880 Speaker 2: and open up about a lot of. 41 00:02:00,680 --> 00:02:03,240 Speaker 1: It was different. It was different. It definitely was a 42 00:02:03,800 --> 00:02:06,960 Speaker 1: new experience for me. Uh, you know, I've opened up 43 00:02:07,000 --> 00:02:10,960 Speaker 1: before and in a very different settings in group sessions 44 00:02:11,000 --> 00:02:12,520 Speaker 1: and stuff like that, but to put it all out 45 00:02:12,560 --> 00:02:14,920 Speaker 1: there like that on the mic was Uh. It was 46 00:02:14,919 --> 00:02:18,200 Speaker 1: an experience, but a good one. A good one definitely 47 00:02:18,840 --> 00:02:21,720 Speaker 1: some growth and positive all positive coming from it. 48 00:02:21,919 --> 00:02:23,680 Speaker 2: Well, man, I'm glad that you did it, and I've 49 00:02:23,680 --> 00:02:25,600 Speaker 2: been meaning to have yon. I'm glad we were able 50 00:02:25,600 --> 00:02:27,079 Speaker 2: to connect that kind of put the pedal to the 51 00:02:27,120 --> 00:02:28,840 Speaker 2: metal right there. I wanted to have you on because 52 00:02:29,120 --> 00:02:32,360 Speaker 2: you know, you have such an unbelievable esteem career in 53 00:02:32,400 --> 00:02:35,320 Speaker 2: the US. You know, military, You've been in so many 54 00:02:35,440 --> 00:02:38,240 Speaker 2: leadership positions, but also you know, you were one hell 55 00:02:38,240 --> 00:02:40,520 Speaker 2: of an athlete back in your day, and and you 56 00:02:40,520 --> 00:02:42,600 Speaker 2: know a lot of you know, sports parents, a lot 57 00:02:42,639 --> 00:02:44,640 Speaker 2: of kids, a lot of coaches and such will listen 58 00:02:44,680 --> 00:02:46,760 Speaker 2: to this a little bit of history about Matt and I. 59 00:02:46,840 --> 00:02:49,359 Speaker 2: You know, we played every sport we can possibly imagine 60 00:02:49,400 --> 00:02:51,280 Speaker 2: against each other with each other back in the day 61 00:02:51,320 --> 00:02:53,960 Speaker 2: when we were kids. Our brothers played high school football together. 62 00:02:54,760 --> 00:02:57,079 Speaker 2: He and I played football together against each other in 63 00:02:57,160 --> 00:02:59,720 Speaker 2: high school. And then I guess, Matt, you know we're 64 00:02:59,720 --> 00:03:02,440 Speaker 2: such a good athlete, you go into the military, what 65 00:03:02,480 --> 00:03:04,480 Speaker 2: are you you're nineteen twenty years old when. 66 00:03:04,320 --> 00:03:06,440 Speaker 1: You go into the army twenty twenty. 67 00:03:06,520 --> 00:03:09,480 Speaker 2: I went twenty years old, and immediately you just jump 68 00:03:09,560 --> 00:03:12,639 Speaker 2: into I'm going into Special Force astraight, Like, how did 69 00:03:12,680 --> 00:03:16,040 Speaker 2: your athletic career help you become? I guess from what 70 00:03:16,120 --> 00:03:18,720 Speaker 2: I read, forty five people tried out for that eighteen 71 00:03:18,800 --> 00:03:21,960 Speaker 2: month grueling session of the of the training, and only 72 00:03:22,040 --> 00:03:24,280 Speaker 2: three were standing at the end. You were one of them. Like, 73 00:03:24,360 --> 00:03:27,239 Speaker 2: what did you do in athletics that allowed you, I 74 00:03:27,240 --> 00:03:29,440 Speaker 2: guess to have not only the physical but the mental 75 00:03:29,480 --> 00:03:31,000 Speaker 2: wherewithal to be able to get through that. 76 00:03:31,480 --> 00:03:34,480 Speaker 1: Oh that's it paved the way. It gave me the 77 00:03:34,560 --> 00:03:36,520 Speaker 1: keys to the kingdom, I guess you could say, really, 78 00:03:37,000 --> 00:03:39,600 Speaker 1: because all the qualities and all the skills that I 79 00:03:39,680 --> 00:03:43,240 Speaker 1: needed to be successful in that type of environment were 80 00:03:43,760 --> 00:03:47,640 Speaker 1: learned and polished through all those years with you playing 81 00:03:47,720 --> 00:03:51,720 Speaker 1: sports in high school and the competitiveness and the camaraderie 82 00:03:52,120 --> 00:03:55,160 Speaker 1: and learning how to be a good leader from you know, 83 00:03:55,200 --> 00:03:56,720 Speaker 1: the captain of the football team when I was a 84 00:03:56,760 --> 00:04:00,600 Speaker 1: sophomore to you know, coach Telegrio, and you know, all 85 00:04:00,600 --> 00:04:03,400 Speaker 1: the mentors that I had and then bad leaders, you know, 86 00:04:03,520 --> 00:04:06,240 Speaker 1: being able to identify them and what I take away 87 00:04:06,280 --> 00:04:08,520 Speaker 1: from from this guy and that guy. So when I 88 00:04:08,520 --> 00:04:11,040 Speaker 1: got the Special Forces, it almost felt like at home. 89 00:04:11,080 --> 00:04:13,560 Speaker 1: It felt like a football team to me, it really was. 90 00:04:13,400 --> 00:04:16,520 Speaker 1: It was it was the same type of mentality, a 91 00:04:16,560 --> 00:04:19,520 Speaker 1: bunch of guys working towards the same goal, working together. 92 00:04:19,880 --> 00:04:21,560 Speaker 1: To be honest, it was almost I'm not going to 93 00:04:21,600 --> 00:04:24,320 Speaker 1: say easy, because physically it was challenging, but it was 94 00:04:24,400 --> 00:04:26,640 Speaker 1: easier for me than I think other guys that were 95 00:04:26,839 --> 00:04:29,240 Speaker 1: left in the right of being because I already had 96 00:04:29,320 --> 00:04:33,039 Speaker 1: those key qualities that you learned playing sports, how to 97 00:04:33,080 --> 00:04:35,200 Speaker 1: be a member of the team, how to follow, then 98 00:04:35,200 --> 00:04:38,000 Speaker 1: how to lead, And I think that's what made me successful. 99 00:04:38,480 --> 00:04:41,200 Speaker 2: One of the big things that often comes up, you know, 100 00:04:41,640 --> 00:04:44,760 Speaker 2: particularly today, is you know, as a parent. I know 101 00:04:44,800 --> 00:04:47,600 Speaker 2: you're a parent as well. You know, it's challenging at 102 00:04:47,640 --> 00:04:50,479 Speaker 2: times to you know, some people don't really like seeing 103 00:04:50,480 --> 00:04:53,520 Speaker 2: their kids struggle. But I mean, here you are, twenty 104 00:04:53,600 --> 00:04:55,839 Speaker 2: twenty one years old. You're going through some of the 105 00:04:55,880 --> 00:04:59,360 Speaker 2: most intense training and learning. You know, in the battlefield, 106 00:04:59,480 --> 00:05:02,560 Speaker 2: right like there had to be adversity constantly. Was there 107 00:05:02,560 --> 00:05:05,080 Speaker 2: anything that like you pulled out of your childhood or 108 00:05:05,120 --> 00:05:08,560 Speaker 2: any struggles that maybe you know, you could look back on, 109 00:05:08,640 --> 00:05:11,080 Speaker 2: maybe from your athletic background to be like, man, I've 110 00:05:11,120 --> 00:05:11,839 Speaker 2: been here before. 111 00:05:12,360 --> 00:05:16,240 Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, I think it would be more with the 112 00:05:16,279 --> 00:05:19,600 Speaker 1: interaction with teammates. You know, I did pull Like I 113 00:05:19,600 --> 00:05:22,560 Speaker 1: remember when it was Thanksgiving weekend the Holy Cross and 114 00:05:22,600 --> 00:05:25,120 Speaker 1: they would let the freshmen practice that week with the varsity, 115 00:05:25,400 --> 00:05:28,360 Speaker 1: and uh, you know, you got some senior They pick 116 00:05:28,400 --> 00:05:30,800 Speaker 1: on the freshmen. They bully the freshman, you know, and 117 00:05:30,800 --> 00:05:32,440 Speaker 1: they make life hard for him. You know. So when 118 00:05:32,480 --> 00:05:35,080 Speaker 1: you get to a special courts team, it's very similar. 119 00:05:35,120 --> 00:05:37,719 Speaker 1: It's like I'm that freshman again with these older guys 120 00:05:37,960 --> 00:05:40,400 Speaker 1: and you have to put your pride aside to follow 121 00:05:40,640 --> 00:05:42,560 Speaker 1: and listen. And I just said to my son the 122 00:05:42,600 --> 00:05:44,479 Speaker 1: other day, because you just started playing football, the same 123 00:05:44,520 --> 00:05:46,679 Speaker 1: advice I gave him would be advice that I learned 124 00:05:46,800 --> 00:05:49,360 Speaker 1: growing up playing football and I used throughout my whole career. 125 00:05:49,520 --> 00:05:51,880 Speaker 1: Sometimes don't listen to how the coach is saying it 126 00:05:51,960 --> 00:05:54,240 Speaker 1: to you, listen to what he's saying to you. You know, 127 00:05:54,240 --> 00:05:56,400 Speaker 1: guys are gonna scream, they're gonna yell at you. Filter 128 00:05:56,560 --> 00:05:59,640 Speaker 1: that out. And just received the message do not miss 129 00:05:59,680 --> 00:06:02,120 Speaker 1: the mess is because he's yelling at you, you know, 130 00:06:02,279 --> 00:06:04,880 Speaker 1: And that was a big takeaway for me. That's something 131 00:06:04,960 --> 00:06:06,640 Speaker 1: I've always I've always held tied to. 132 00:06:07,080 --> 00:06:09,760 Speaker 2: And it seems like you've always been in leadership positions man, 133 00:06:09,880 --> 00:06:12,280 Speaker 2: like you know, you talk about being a younger, you know, 134 00:06:12,320 --> 00:06:14,800 Speaker 2: a young man and you probably had guys that were wailed. 135 00:06:15,080 --> 00:06:17,800 Speaker 2: Did you morph into a leader in the military, Like, 136 00:06:17,839 --> 00:06:22,040 Speaker 2: how did you become someone who is so revered and 137 00:06:22,120 --> 00:06:25,600 Speaker 2: followed by, you know, your teammates in the military. Did 138 00:06:25,600 --> 00:06:27,240 Speaker 2: it come naturally to you or is that something you 139 00:06:27,279 --> 00:06:28,240 Speaker 2: had to learn from experience. 140 00:06:29,040 --> 00:06:31,920 Speaker 1: This is a long debate that I think my whole 141 00:06:31,920 --> 00:06:35,000 Speaker 1: time in the military, we debate this topic. Can you 142 00:06:35,080 --> 00:06:36,200 Speaker 1: teach leadership? 143 00:06:36,440 --> 00:06:37,360 Speaker 2: Can you teach. 144 00:06:37,120 --> 00:06:39,320 Speaker 1: Someone how to be a leader? The military thinks that 145 00:06:39,400 --> 00:06:41,560 Speaker 1: they can't. You know, they send you to leadership schools, 146 00:06:41,600 --> 00:06:43,719 Speaker 1: they e spent you to come back a leader. This 147 00:06:43,800 --> 00:06:46,240 Speaker 1: is mat Docu's personal opinion. I don't think you can 148 00:06:46,279 --> 00:06:49,040 Speaker 1: teach leadership. I don't think you can take someone and 149 00:06:49,120 --> 00:06:51,200 Speaker 1: teach him to be a good leader. Now you can 150 00:06:51,240 --> 00:06:53,680 Speaker 1: provide him with the qualities and the characteristics of what 151 00:06:53,680 --> 00:06:56,480 Speaker 1: a good leader looks like and maybe help him act 152 00:06:56,520 --> 00:06:59,039 Speaker 1: like a good leader. But from what I see and 153 00:06:59,040 --> 00:07:02,480 Speaker 1: what I've seen through my it's the guys that played 154 00:07:02,520 --> 00:07:05,159 Speaker 1: some type of sports, the guys that were always involved 155 00:07:05,160 --> 00:07:08,839 Speaker 1: in that team setting. I believe good leaders are made 156 00:07:09,080 --> 00:07:12,960 Speaker 1: through experiences growing up, you know, as they go through life. 157 00:07:13,000 --> 00:07:15,720 Speaker 1: They are the experiences that they are a part of 158 00:07:16,200 --> 00:07:18,440 Speaker 1: morph them either into a good leader or a bad leader, 159 00:07:18,920 --> 00:07:21,600 Speaker 1: or doesn't understand what leadership is, or just doesn't have 160 00:07:21,600 --> 00:07:23,600 Speaker 1: that quality in them. Some people are I don't think 161 00:07:23,600 --> 00:07:25,400 Speaker 1: are made to be leaders, and there's nothing wrong with that. 162 00:07:26,520 --> 00:07:30,119 Speaker 1: But I do believe that it's I became the leader 163 00:07:30,160 --> 00:07:33,920 Speaker 1: that I became because of coach Trull, like Holy Cross, 164 00:07:33,960 --> 00:07:37,240 Speaker 1: because of you know, my coach in college, because of 165 00:07:37,280 --> 00:07:39,120 Speaker 1: the mentors I had when I was when I was 166 00:07:39,160 --> 00:07:42,040 Speaker 1: young in Special Forces and some great leaders that pulled 167 00:07:42,080 --> 00:07:43,640 Speaker 1: me in and mentored me, and I was able to 168 00:07:43,680 --> 00:07:46,040 Speaker 1: pull those key things that I see in them as leaders. 169 00:07:46,240 --> 00:07:47,960 Speaker 1: And then the bad leaders. I've had a lot of 170 00:07:48,000 --> 00:07:50,480 Speaker 1: bad leaders in my career as well. I remember like 171 00:07:50,560 --> 00:07:52,920 Speaker 1: things that they did that I in my mind, I'm 172 00:07:52,920 --> 00:07:54,600 Speaker 1: not going to do that. That's not the leader I 173 00:07:54,640 --> 00:07:56,400 Speaker 1: want to be. So when I get into that position, 174 00:07:57,160 --> 00:07:59,240 Speaker 1: or when I did get to that position of leadership 175 00:07:59,480 --> 00:08:01,640 Speaker 1: in my raign, I knew, I knew the type of 176 00:08:01,680 --> 00:08:03,760 Speaker 1: leader I wanted to be. I knew the mistakes that 177 00:08:03,800 --> 00:08:06,960 Speaker 1: I've seen leaders make, and I remember the impacts that 178 00:08:07,160 --> 00:08:10,680 Speaker 1: those mistakes would have on our team and on individuals, 179 00:08:10,920 --> 00:08:14,679 Speaker 1: And I just made a kindness effort to be that leader. 180 00:08:15,240 --> 00:08:17,120 Speaker 2: So at the end of the day, like and listening 181 00:08:17,120 --> 00:08:19,400 Speaker 2: to the podcast you did with Team Trek, you kept 182 00:08:19,440 --> 00:08:22,200 Speaker 2: bringing up the word being vulnerable, you know, you kept 183 00:08:22,200 --> 00:08:25,800 Speaker 2: saying how getting vulnerable, having empathy. In fact, you talked 184 00:08:25,840 --> 00:08:29,440 Speaker 2: in great detail about some trauma that you experienced, and 185 00:08:29,480 --> 00:08:32,560 Speaker 2: you know, one incident in particular kind of shaped you know, 186 00:08:32,720 --> 00:08:36,640 Speaker 2: your life really and caused you to maybe later on, like, 187 00:08:37,120 --> 00:08:39,360 Speaker 2: you know, have instances come up where you may have 188 00:08:39,360 --> 00:08:41,600 Speaker 2: had a shorter fuse, maybe not have shown some empathy 189 00:08:41,600 --> 00:08:43,280 Speaker 2: because I heard, you know, during the podcast and we 190 00:08:43,320 --> 00:08:45,840 Speaker 2: talked a little bit beforehand, you know how if you 191 00:08:45,840 --> 00:08:48,319 Speaker 2: can go back, maybe you would. And I asked you 192 00:08:48,400 --> 00:08:51,040 Speaker 2: before we started recording, like do you think that there's 193 00:08:51,040 --> 00:08:53,800 Speaker 2: strength and empathy, Like do you think that you know, 194 00:08:53,880 --> 00:08:56,800 Speaker 2: showing empathy maybe taking time to talk to someone, Because 195 00:08:56,800 --> 00:08:58,840 Speaker 2: when you're in the military and you're you're you're in 196 00:08:58,880 --> 00:09:01,400 Speaker 2: Afghanistan and you're in the desert, you're in a combat. 197 00:09:01,520 --> 00:09:03,400 Speaker 2: I mean, you're dealing with life and death. So my 198 00:09:03,559 --> 00:09:06,480 Speaker 2: question to you was having that few minutes of counsel 199 00:09:06,600 --> 00:09:10,360 Speaker 2: with someone to maybe help them through, would that maybe 200 00:09:10,800 --> 00:09:13,880 Speaker 2: slow them down? And your response actually called me and 201 00:09:14,280 --> 00:09:15,640 Speaker 2: I would love for you to kind of talk about 202 00:09:15,679 --> 00:09:17,640 Speaker 2: how empathy might be an advantage. 203 00:09:18,160 --> 00:09:20,840 Speaker 1: You know, if you asked me that question at twenty 204 00:09:20,880 --> 00:09:24,000 Speaker 1: six years old, I probably would answer it much definitely now, 205 00:09:24,120 --> 00:09:26,680 Speaker 1: because I wasn't at that point of understanding what a 206 00:09:26,679 --> 00:09:28,720 Speaker 1: good leader is, you know, I would think that would 207 00:09:28,720 --> 00:09:30,720 Speaker 1: show weakness, like there's no, we don't have time for 208 00:09:30,720 --> 00:09:32,920 Speaker 1: that to we're on a mission or or you know, 209 00:09:32,960 --> 00:09:34,199 Speaker 1: we have a goal that we have to get you 210 00:09:34,240 --> 00:09:37,280 Speaker 1: no matter what. And that's the wrong answer in my opinion, 211 00:09:37,320 --> 00:09:41,000 Speaker 1: that's the wrong answer. I think vulnerability empathy that doesn't 212 00:09:41,000 --> 00:09:43,240 Speaker 1: show a weakness, that shows the strength of the leader, 213 00:09:43,360 --> 00:09:46,840 Speaker 1: That shows the leader's ability to take off that shield 214 00:09:47,320 --> 00:09:51,600 Speaker 1: and show genuine concern for a player, for a soldier, 215 00:09:51,760 --> 00:09:56,960 Speaker 1: for you know, a coworker. I think that it's unmeasurable 216 00:09:57,320 --> 00:09:59,600 Speaker 1: the benefits that that's going to do for him, as 217 00:09:59,600 --> 00:10:02,400 Speaker 1: a leader. That's what that's what it would do for 218 00:10:02,480 --> 00:10:05,640 Speaker 1: the team. I've had leaders that have done that with me, 219 00:10:06,320 --> 00:10:09,320 Speaker 1: and twenty years later, I'll still follow them anywhere. They 220 00:10:09,360 --> 00:10:12,120 Speaker 1: have my loyalty, they have my work. I will work 221 00:10:12,120 --> 00:10:14,319 Speaker 1: my ass off of these guys. And it's because of that. 222 00:10:14,360 --> 00:10:16,800 Speaker 1: It's because that they showed me that vulnerability, they showed 223 00:10:16,840 --> 00:10:20,440 Speaker 1: me that genuine care for my well being above just 224 00:10:20,480 --> 00:10:23,840 Speaker 1: being a number, above just being a tool for the 225 00:10:23,840 --> 00:10:28,160 Speaker 1: military to use. And it's priceless, I think right there. 226 00:10:28,360 --> 00:10:31,000 Speaker 1: When you do that with one of your guys, you 227 00:10:31,120 --> 00:10:35,199 Speaker 1: solidify a relationship not just professional, but also personal. It's 228 00:10:35,200 --> 00:10:38,760 Speaker 1: a bond that's it's unbreakable, definitely signed us strengths. 229 00:10:39,240 --> 00:10:43,000 Speaker 2: So that bond, that relationship that you're talking about becomes 230 00:10:43,120 --> 00:10:46,480 Speaker 2: it like blooms when you get real with somebody, like hey, 231 00:10:46,920 --> 00:10:48,920 Speaker 2: you take that guard down, you show your guard and 232 00:10:49,000 --> 00:10:51,320 Speaker 2: you let that human know like it's not about just 233 00:10:51,360 --> 00:10:53,480 Speaker 2: we go get this w It's not about just you know, 234 00:10:53,720 --> 00:10:55,360 Speaker 2: we got to go finish this mission. It's not about 235 00:10:55,360 --> 00:10:57,760 Speaker 2: we just got to go, you know, hit this quota 236 00:10:57,800 --> 00:10:59,840 Speaker 2: for the month. It's about I care about you as 237 00:10:59,880 --> 00:11:02,160 Speaker 2: a person, and that in and of itself will make 238 00:11:02,200 --> 00:11:03,720 Speaker 2: you run through a brick wall for somebody. 239 00:11:04,040 --> 00:11:06,680 Speaker 1: Oh yeah, when you when you when you humanize yourself 240 00:11:06,960 --> 00:11:09,960 Speaker 1: and you humanize me. Now I'm not just a tool 241 00:11:10,040 --> 00:11:12,760 Speaker 1: or number to you or something you're using to achieve 242 00:11:12,760 --> 00:11:17,680 Speaker 1: a goal. Right now, you humanized me and made sure 243 00:11:17,720 --> 00:11:21,120 Speaker 1: that I understand that I am more important than whatever 244 00:11:21,120 --> 00:11:24,320 Speaker 1: we're doing here. I think anybody would take that from 245 00:11:24,360 --> 00:11:26,559 Speaker 1: a leader or a boss and run with it and 246 00:11:27,080 --> 00:11:29,199 Speaker 1: you know, do the right thing and follow them absolutely. 247 00:11:29,760 --> 00:11:32,520 Speaker 2: When you're you talk about teamwork and being a great teammate, 248 00:11:32,520 --> 00:11:34,800 Speaker 2: which is something that I talk about a lot. You know, 249 00:11:34,880 --> 00:11:37,160 Speaker 2: we talk about a lot and I personally and I 250 00:11:37,160 --> 00:11:39,280 Speaker 2: would love to hear your thought on this because I 251 00:11:39,720 --> 00:11:42,200 Speaker 2: try my best with my own kids and when I'm 252 00:11:42,280 --> 00:11:45,600 Speaker 2: coaching teams, particularly a young age. Is like I think 253 00:11:45,640 --> 00:11:47,960 Speaker 2: you can teach somebody. I think learning to be a 254 00:11:47,960 --> 00:11:50,520 Speaker 2: great teammate is. I think that's a learned skill. I 255 00:11:50,559 --> 00:11:53,640 Speaker 2: think it's it's it's teaching kids like it's not all 256 00:11:53,679 --> 00:11:55,320 Speaker 2: about you, And I think a lot of that starts 257 00:11:55,320 --> 00:11:57,200 Speaker 2: at home. As a parent, I think that I have 258 00:11:57,280 --> 00:11:58,880 Speaker 2: to do that as a parent, I have to do 259 00:11:58,920 --> 00:12:01,280 Speaker 2: that as a coach. But what are your thoughts on 260 00:12:01,559 --> 00:12:04,839 Speaker 2: you know, can you teach kids to be great teammates? 261 00:12:04,880 --> 00:12:07,120 Speaker 2: Can you teach people to be a great teammate? And 262 00:12:07,160 --> 00:12:10,360 Speaker 2: if so? Or if not? But if so, like, what 263 00:12:10,480 --> 00:12:13,480 Speaker 2: are ways in which that you believe could help people 264 00:12:13,559 --> 00:12:15,480 Speaker 2: learn to become a great team and not be selfish. 265 00:12:15,960 --> 00:12:18,240 Speaker 1: I think one of the number one qualities of being 266 00:12:18,280 --> 00:12:21,199 Speaker 1: a leader is leading by example. I think that's that 267 00:12:21,280 --> 00:12:25,319 Speaker 1: right there. Teaching kids or green berets, you're you're talking 268 00:12:25,320 --> 00:12:27,120 Speaker 1: about seven year old or you're talking about thirty year 269 00:12:27,120 --> 00:12:30,840 Speaker 1: old you know, are chargers. It's the same thing, leading 270 00:12:30,840 --> 00:12:33,400 Speaker 1: by example, showing that you're putting the team first. You're 271 00:12:33,440 --> 00:12:36,440 Speaker 1: putting this guy first, you know, developing these guys, doing 272 00:12:36,480 --> 00:12:38,160 Speaker 1: whatever we need to do to make each of them 273 00:12:38,200 --> 00:12:40,880 Speaker 1: better and making each other better because you get that 274 00:12:41,000 --> 00:12:44,240 Speaker 1: understanding of we're on a team. So if you're great 275 00:12:44,360 --> 00:12:47,199 Speaker 1: and all of us are mediocre, well the team's mediocre. 276 00:12:47,480 --> 00:12:49,800 Speaker 1: But if everyone on a team is great, how much 277 00:12:49,840 --> 00:12:51,400 Speaker 1: better are we going to be as a unit? You know? 278 00:12:51,400 --> 00:12:53,160 Speaker 1: And once you get everyone to buy off on that 279 00:12:53,480 --> 00:12:55,959 Speaker 1: and to drink that kool aid, you know, there's no 280 00:12:55,960 --> 00:12:58,720 Speaker 1: stopping you. So I think leading by example and you 281 00:12:58,800 --> 00:13:01,000 Speaker 1: do that by You know, when I was a charge 282 00:13:01,000 --> 00:13:03,440 Speaker 1: of by team, that was all about getting you the 283 00:13:03,440 --> 00:13:06,280 Speaker 1: schools that you want, getting you more training, making you 284 00:13:06,320 --> 00:13:08,720 Speaker 1: a better soldier. I'm not trying to keep you down 285 00:13:08,760 --> 00:13:10,360 Speaker 1: so I can keep my position. I'm trying to make 286 00:13:10,400 --> 00:13:12,840 Speaker 1: all of you better so we can be better as 287 00:13:12,840 --> 00:13:15,960 Speaker 1: a team. And you see when guys see that, they 288 00:13:16,000 --> 00:13:18,000 Speaker 1: start doing that with each other. You know, they become 289 00:13:18,000 --> 00:13:20,520 Speaker 1: better teammates. They start putting their teammate first. It's all 290 00:13:21,559 --> 00:13:24,280 Speaker 1: instead of I, it's all about us. And I think 291 00:13:24,280 --> 00:13:25,320 Speaker 1: it's as by example. 292 00:13:26,080 --> 00:13:29,200 Speaker 2: So you really, I mean when you talk about you know, 293 00:13:29,240 --> 00:13:30,800 Speaker 2: you were out and I mean, what do you have? 294 00:13:30,840 --> 00:13:32,920 Speaker 2: You have two purple hearts, you have a bronze what 295 00:13:32,960 --> 00:13:35,920 Speaker 2: is it? A bronze star? Yeah, so I mean you're 296 00:13:36,000 --> 00:13:38,480 Speaker 2: highly decorated. You have been in the thick of it. 297 00:13:39,000 --> 00:13:42,920 Speaker 2: How many tours have you done Afganistan for and then 298 00:13:42,920 --> 00:13:44,360 Speaker 2: a bunch to wear South America? 299 00:13:44,559 --> 00:13:49,080 Speaker 1: South America? Yeah, pretty much every country minus Venezuela and Nicaragua. 300 00:13:49,240 --> 00:13:52,240 Speaker 2: So you've been in the belly of the beast. At 301 00:13:52,280 --> 00:13:55,120 Speaker 2: the end of the day, the same type of things 302 00:13:55,160 --> 00:13:57,480 Speaker 2: you learn playing sports, being a part of a team 303 00:13:57,600 --> 00:14:01,199 Speaker 2: really translate into that real world life and death situation 304 00:14:01,400 --> 00:14:04,160 Speaker 2: like it is. It's really that much of a mirror 305 00:14:04,280 --> 00:14:06,920 Speaker 2: situation from a camaraderie, from a team building aspect and 306 00:14:07,000 --> 00:14:07,880 Speaker 2: leadership aspect. 307 00:14:08,400 --> 00:14:10,800 Speaker 1: You know, I always speak for you know, Special Forces, 308 00:14:10,800 --> 00:14:13,000 Speaker 1: Like my whole career is a Special Forces. So we're 309 00:14:13,040 --> 00:14:15,400 Speaker 1: on a twelve man team. If we're lucky, nine, ten, eleven, 310 00:14:15,440 --> 00:14:19,040 Speaker 1: twelve guys dependent, but those are that's your team. That's 311 00:14:19,040 --> 00:14:23,040 Speaker 1: your team for years. It mirrors. It mirrors my high 312 00:14:23,080 --> 00:14:27,200 Speaker 1: school football team. It mirrors my college. It mirrors sports 313 00:14:27,360 --> 00:14:30,560 Speaker 1: to the tea. It really does. From the coach down. 314 00:14:30,920 --> 00:14:32,720 Speaker 1: You know, we have a team sergeant instead of a coach. 315 00:14:33,240 --> 00:14:37,560 Speaker 1: And every issue or every challenge that I had on 316 00:14:37,600 --> 00:14:40,280 Speaker 1: any team playing sports are very similar challenges I have 317 00:14:40,880 --> 00:14:43,840 Speaker 1: on a Special Force to team, you know, minus obviously 318 00:14:44,000 --> 00:14:47,120 Speaker 1: the mission and stuff like that. But you're still working 319 00:14:47,120 --> 00:14:50,120 Speaker 1: towards a goal, unified as a team. In order for 320 00:14:50,200 --> 00:14:51,960 Speaker 1: us to win or in order for us to have 321 00:14:52,040 --> 00:14:54,760 Speaker 1: a successful mission, we have to work as a team. 322 00:14:55,200 --> 00:14:58,280 Speaker 1: You have to do your responsibilities, and you will succeed. 323 00:14:58,440 --> 00:15:01,080 Speaker 1: I mean, that's that's really a matter. Playing seventh grade 324 00:15:01,080 --> 00:15:03,320 Speaker 1: te ball, if we work as a team and do 325 00:15:03,480 --> 00:15:05,800 Speaker 1: what we've learned, and you know, take care of what 326 00:15:05,840 --> 00:15:10,120 Speaker 1: your specific responsibility is. The team does well, and it's 327 00:15:10,160 --> 00:15:13,160 Speaker 1: the same thing. It's across the board from what I've seen, 328 00:15:13,800 --> 00:15:14,000 Speaker 1: you know. 329 00:15:14,040 --> 00:15:17,119 Speaker 2: It's it's fascinating to me how we take these lessons 330 00:15:17,680 --> 00:15:19,720 Speaker 2: and incorporate them because I can speak for myself and 331 00:15:19,560 --> 00:15:22,400 Speaker 2: my business experience and everything I've ever done it and 332 00:15:22,440 --> 00:15:24,560 Speaker 2: it all translates, It all correlates, which is why I'm 333 00:15:24,600 --> 00:15:27,840 Speaker 2: such a big proponent on kids, you know, being well rounded, 334 00:15:27,880 --> 00:15:31,360 Speaker 2: playing different sports, but also having different experiences and more 335 00:15:31,400 --> 00:15:33,560 Speaker 2: important than like allowing your kids to fail. 336 00:15:33,840 --> 00:15:34,000 Speaker 1: You know. 337 00:15:34,040 --> 00:15:37,200 Speaker 2: I interviewed Tim KORbin, head baseball coach at Vanderbilt, and 338 00:15:37,240 --> 00:15:39,360 Speaker 2: he's like, when your kids are out there, he kind 339 00:15:39,360 --> 00:15:41,720 Speaker 2: of gave an analogy of throughout their swimming in the 340 00:15:41,760 --> 00:15:44,160 Speaker 2: water and there and they're struggling a little bit, don't 341 00:15:44,160 --> 00:15:46,040 Speaker 2: be so quick to throw them the life jacket, you know, 342 00:15:46,080 --> 00:15:48,440 Speaker 2: don't be so quick like allow them the opportunity to 343 00:15:48,480 --> 00:15:51,200 Speaker 2: work through it. It's so quick nowadays. If things aren't 344 00:15:51,240 --> 00:15:53,360 Speaker 2: going right, we're gonna bounce to another team. We're gonna 345 00:15:53,360 --> 00:15:55,440 Speaker 2: go here, we're gonna quit, we're gonna go there. And 346 00:15:55,520 --> 00:15:58,400 Speaker 2: as a parent. Listen, are there times in which a 347 00:15:58,440 --> 00:16:02,880 Speaker 2: situation is better some or else? Sure, but there's definitely value, 348 00:16:03,520 --> 00:16:05,920 Speaker 2: especially particularly at young ages, and you have to learn 349 00:16:05,960 --> 00:16:08,360 Speaker 2: it early. Man, Like these kids got to learn how 350 00:16:08,360 --> 00:16:11,720 Speaker 2: to get uncomfortable. So, as a parent, is that something 351 00:16:11,720 --> 00:16:13,320 Speaker 2: that you're going to try to do with your kids 352 00:16:13,400 --> 00:16:15,360 Speaker 2: is like allow them to out? But how do you 353 00:16:15,440 --> 00:16:18,560 Speaker 2: balance that, right? Because do you revert back to stick 354 00:16:18,600 --> 00:16:20,360 Speaker 2: your chest out, don't talk about it, or do you 355 00:16:20,360 --> 00:16:24,280 Speaker 2: show that same empathy and encouragement and help guide them 356 00:16:24,320 --> 00:16:26,680 Speaker 2: through it while still allow them to feel that struggle. 357 00:16:27,280 --> 00:16:29,440 Speaker 1: Let me tell you that is that just happens to 358 00:16:29,480 --> 00:16:32,680 Speaker 1: me with my son Joshua right eighth grade. Down here, 359 00:16:32,720 --> 00:16:35,360 Speaker 1: they have the actual football at the school in seventh 360 00:16:35,400 --> 00:16:37,520 Speaker 1: and eighth grade. They don't have it up nors. So 361 00:16:37,600 --> 00:16:39,960 Speaker 1: he's playing in football for the first time in his life. Right, 362 00:16:40,000 --> 00:16:43,720 Speaker 1: he always played soccer, plays football. Kids a great athlete. 363 00:16:43,760 --> 00:16:46,640 Speaker 1: My son's a great athlete. He probably saw one minute 364 00:16:46,720 --> 00:16:51,240 Speaker 1: of playtime the whole season, one minute of playtime ten 365 00:16:51,320 --> 00:16:54,120 Speaker 1: games eighth grade. Dude, I think the coach was a 366 00:16:54,120 --> 00:16:56,480 Speaker 1: good coach. No, I don't. I think the coaches were 367 00:16:56,560 --> 00:16:58,640 Speaker 1: horrible coaches. Did I ever say that to my son. 368 00:16:58,720 --> 00:17:01,400 Speaker 1: Absolutely not right. I'm not gonna get I'm not gonna 369 00:17:01,440 --> 00:17:05,000 Speaker 1: give him that blame or that ability to blame the 370 00:17:05,040 --> 00:17:09,480 Speaker 1: coach or whatever. No, you work hard and whatever happens 371 00:17:09,520 --> 00:17:11,320 Speaker 1: happens as long as you know you worked hard as 372 00:17:11,320 --> 00:17:14,880 Speaker 1: you could and he did. So now what do we do? Okay, 373 00:17:14,880 --> 00:17:16,880 Speaker 1: I switch them to Destin high school where he'll get 374 00:17:16,880 --> 00:17:19,240 Speaker 1: more playing time. Do I switch on the Choctaw where 375 00:17:19,440 --> 00:17:22,280 Speaker 1: they have a weak team so it gets more playing time. No, 376 00:17:22,600 --> 00:17:25,320 Speaker 1: I'm not gonna do that. You need to make a decision. 377 00:17:25,359 --> 00:17:27,879 Speaker 1: So I told you go to crossroads. You take that 378 00:17:28,560 --> 00:17:32,000 Speaker 1: and turn it into fuel and work hard to get 379 00:17:32,000 --> 00:17:34,760 Speaker 1: your playing time this next year. Or do you use 380 00:17:34,800 --> 00:17:37,240 Speaker 1: it as if as an excuse of failure I hate 381 00:17:37,280 --> 00:17:40,840 Speaker 1: the coach about No, you take countability for your actions. 382 00:17:41,040 --> 00:17:42,399 Speaker 1: Work your ass off, and that's why I told me. 383 00:17:42,440 --> 00:17:44,040 Speaker 1: I said, if you work your ass off, put the 384 00:17:44,080 --> 00:17:47,240 Speaker 1: time in, and then let's see what happens. But we 385 00:17:47,359 --> 00:17:49,639 Speaker 1: need to know did you try your best. If you 386 00:17:49,680 --> 00:17:52,240 Speaker 1: tried your best and you're not gonna play well, then 387 00:17:52,320 --> 00:17:55,760 Speaker 1: you know we could talk other options. And that's what 388 00:17:55,800 --> 00:17:58,080 Speaker 1: he did. I'd be honest with you. I can't believe 389 00:17:58,080 --> 00:18:02,160 Speaker 1: how hard he worked and he's getting his rewards. Now 390 00:18:02,200 --> 00:18:04,240 Speaker 1: you know he's starting this year, he's you know, he's 391 00:18:04,240 --> 00:18:06,479 Speaker 1: doing he's doing very well. So I think that's an 392 00:18:06,520 --> 00:18:09,480 Speaker 1: example of because I think a lot of parents immediately 393 00:18:09,560 --> 00:18:12,000 Speaker 1: with the coaches, don't know what they're doing the right 394 00:18:12,160 --> 00:18:14,720 Speaker 1: They get the kid and out and you can't blame 395 00:18:14,800 --> 00:18:17,119 Speaker 1: the coaches, you know, as easy as that is, it's 396 00:18:17,119 --> 00:18:19,520 Speaker 1: always a coach is fault. You got to I'm trying 397 00:18:19,560 --> 00:18:23,640 Speaker 1: to teach him like accountability. That's that's where I think 398 00:18:23,760 --> 00:18:25,600 Speaker 1: is big with teams is you have to be able 399 00:18:25,600 --> 00:18:28,840 Speaker 1: to be self aware and take accountability. Because he didn't, 400 00:18:28,880 --> 00:18:30,879 Speaker 1: he didn't train hard for this football season. I know 401 00:18:30,920 --> 00:18:34,919 Speaker 1: he didn't. I knew already knew the answer. So be accountable, 402 00:18:35,119 --> 00:18:39,080 Speaker 1: be truthful with yourself, be self aware, and and go 403 00:18:39,160 --> 00:18:41,240 Speaker 1: from there. That's that's why I try and preach, preach 404 00:18:41,280 --> 00:18:43,159 Speaker 1: to him. If you work your ass off, then we 405 00:18:43,160 --> 00:18:45,200 Speaker 1: could talk about it. But until you give it your best, 406 00:18:45,520 --> 00:18:47,720 Speaker 1: until you can look in the mirror and say I've 407 00:18:47,760 --> 00:18:50,480 Speaker 1: done everything that I could do to achieve my goal, 408 00:18:50,600 --> 00:18:53,000 Speaker 1: which is to play right, to start right. As everybody 409 00:18:53,000 --> 00:18:55,080 Speaker 1: wants to do, they want to start and be successful. 410 00:18:55,359 --> 00:18:57,879 Speaker 1: Until you do that, well, then we're not gonna look 411 00:18:57,880 --> 00:18:58,800 Speaker 1: at those other options. 412 00:18:59,080 --> 00:19:01,840 Speaker 2: When we return, Sergeant first Class Docio and I talk 413 00:19:01,880 --> 00:19:05,280 Speaker 2: about his struggles with identity and self work after retiring 414 00:19:05,640 --> 00:19:09,359 Speaker 2: and why finding new passions significantly improved his mental health. 415 00:19:15,600 --> 00:19:17,480 Speaker 2: Where we left off, Matt and I were about to 416 00:19:17,520 --> 00:19:20,120 Speaker 2: discuss why getting to know your teammates on a personal 417 00:19:20,200 --> 00:19:24,920 Speaker 2: level create stronger feelings of support and com robbery. It's 418 00:19:24,960 --> 00:19:28,800 Speaker 2: it's so refreshing, and I feel like I'm surrounded by 419 00:19:29,680 --> 00:19:32,000 Speaker 2: you know, similar people, and my and my you know 420 00:19:32,080 --> 00:19:35,320 Speaker 2: type friend group who get it, and many almost all 421 00:19:35,400 --> 00:19:38,000 Speaker 2: the coaches and athletes and stuff that I have on here, 422 00:19:38,040 --> 00:19:41,520 Speaker 2: and people that I speak to about that accountability piece 423 00:19:41,520 --> 00:19:44,160 Speaker 2: and another element that I really want to get into 424 00:19:44,200 --> 00:19:46,120 Speaker 2: with you, doc is is and you talked a lot 425 00:19:46,160 --> 00:19:48,359 Speaker 2: about it on the podcast with Team Trek, and it's 426 00:19:48,840 --> 00:19:51,400 Speaker 2: it's a topic that really, over the last several years 427 00:19:52,240 --> 00:19:54,840 Speaker 2: has started to become mainstream. You know, you're hearing more 428 00:19:54,880 --> 00:19:58,240 Speaker 2: and more high profile athletes, you know, more and more 429 00:19:58,680 --> 00:20:02,760 Speaker 2: focus on mental health, mental well being, being cognizant of 430 00:20:03,040 --> 00:20:05,440 Speaker 2: being right in all areas of life, not just from 431 00:20:05,480 --> 00:20:08,639 Speaker 2: a physical standpoint. And I know you talked about, you know, 432 00:20:08,720 --> 00:20:11,520 Speaker 2: how you've had to come and work on that as 433 00:20:11,560 --> 00:20:14,520 Speaker 2: I have. And you know, many athletes like Michael Phelps 434 00:20:14,560 --> 00:20:17,159 Speaker 2: and Kevin Love and Simone Biles and others who have 435 00:20:17,240 --> 00:20:20,480 Speaker 2: gotten really vulnerable use their platform to talk about how 436 00:20:20,520 --> 00:20:22,520 Speaker 2: that's such a big thing in their life, Like what 437 00:20:22,720 --> 00:20:26,359 Speaker 2: is it about, you know, working through because listen, I 438 00:20:26,400 --> 00:20:29,800 Speaker 2: look at you, Documan, You're a physical specimen. You clearly 439 00:20:30,240 --> 00:20:32,600 Speaker 2: take good care of yourself, hit the gym, and you're 440 00:20:32,600 --> 00:20:35,240 Speaker 2: as strong as an ox and all that. But at 441 00:20:35,240 --> 00:20:37,360 Speaker 2: the end of the day, you talk about that shield. 442 00:20:37,520 --> 00:20:40,080 Speaker 2: If we're not right upstairs. I know from my own experience, 443 00:20:40,200 --> 00:20:42,920 Speaker 2: like the way I am physically, it ain't gonna fly. 444 00:20:43,560 --> 00:20:46,280 Speaker 2: So how are ways in which you, particularly with your kids. 445 00:20:46,320 --> 00:20:48,120 Speaker 2: And we're talking and a lot of parents and such 446 00:20:48,119 --> 00:20:50,280 Speaker 2: are gonna listen, like how can they look out for 447 00:20:50,359 --> 00:20:53,280 Speaker 2: red flags? Because ever since COVID and such you talk 448 00:20:53,320 --> 00:20:56,000 Speaker 2: about and it's happened here, you know, even people I 449 00:20:56,080 --> 00:20:58,680 Speaker 2: know where they have kids that have it's heartbreaking, but 450 00:20:58,800 --> 00:21:00,280 Speaker 2: you hear more and more kids that are that are 451 00:21:00,280 --> 00:21:03,760 Speaker 2: committing suicide, you know, and they're not talking about things 452 00:21:03,800 --> 00:21:06,679 Speaker 2: and how are ways in which us as parents or 453 00:21:06,720 --> 00:21:08,840 Speaker 2: you maybe any experience you have with with getting or 454 00:21:08,920 --> 00:21:11,920 Speaker 2: vulnerable to be able to open up and understand that 455 00:21:12,520 --> 00:21:14,680 Speaker 2: you have other options than just that. 456 00:21:15,440 --> 00:21:18,600 Speaker 1: Yeah, and it's huge, It's huge. And that's what that 457 00:21:18,640 --> 00:21:24,440 Speaker 1: podcast is about, is about being accountable for the guys. See, 458 00:21:24,440 --> 00:21:26,520 Speaker 1: when you're in the military, they know where you are 459 00:21:27,240 --> 00:21:29,159 Speaker 1: all the time. I know, if I don't show up 460 00:21:29,160 --> 00:21:31,560 Speaker 1: to work at eight a m. Somebody's gonna call me. 461 00:21:31,840 --> 00:21:33,639 Speaker 1: If I don't pick up the phone, somebody's gonna come 462 00:21:33,680 --> 00:21:36,960 Speaker 1: to my house. Because it's the military, right they hold 463 00:21:36,960 --> 00:21:39,880 Speaker 1: you accountable. You are accountable to be here at this time, 464 00:21:39,960 --> 00:21:42,520 Speaker 1: this place. Well, when you leave the military, all of 465 00:21:42,520 --> 00:21:46,320 Speaker 1: a sudden, nobody's accountable for you anymore. There's nobody calling you, 466 00:21:46,359 --> 00:21:48,960 Speaker 1: there's nobody expecting you, there's nobody looking out for you. 467 00:21:49,480 --> 00:21:51,560 Speaker 1: And that's what we're trying to change with that podcast. 468 00:21:51,600 --> 00:21:54,399 Speaker 1: That's the goal of that is who is accountable for you? 469 00:21:54,720 --> 00:21:57,560 Speaker 1: If medachio disappears for three or four days, is there 470 00:21:57,560 --> 00:22:00,119 Speaker 1: anybody that's calling him to see if he's okay? Does 471 00:22:00,119 --> 00:22:03,000 Speaker 1: anybody check in with them? And that's the I think 472 00:22:03,040 --> 00:22:06,040 Speaker 1: the same thing, the same mentality I'm trying to do 473 00:22:06,280 --> 00:22:10,440 Speaker 1: with the kids, right, I'm holding them accountable. When I'm 474 00:22:10,440 --> 00:22:13,719 Speaker 1: holding my kids accountable, it's also an education piece and 475 00:22:13,760 --> 00:22:15,480 Speaker 1: that goes for what I was talking about too, with 476 00:22:15,520 --> 00:22:17,920 Speaker 1: the team trek and holding these guys accountable. It's hard 477 00:22:18,000 --> 00:22:21,439 Speaker 1: for me as a parent, or as a leader or 478 00:22:21,440 --> 00:22:24,440 Speaker 1: as a coach. It's hard for me to identify these 479 00:22:24,480 --> 00:22:27,160 Speaker 1: red flags in a in a player or in a soldier. 480 00:22:27,760 --> 00:22:30,520 Speaker 1: If one, I'm not educated to what red flags are. 481 00:22:31,280 --> 00:22:33,800 Speaker 1: If I'm not educated to what you know signs of 482 00:22:33,840 --> 00:22:38,159 Speaker 1: depression are, if I'm not educated to any mental health 483 00:22:38,640 --> 00:22:43,080 Speaker 1: type thing when it comes to people struggling. Two, am 484 00:22:43,119 --> 00:22:46,200 Speaker 1: I putting in the effort as a leader to get 485 00:22:46,240 --> 00:22:48,879 Speaker 1: to know my guy well enough to be able to 486 00:22:49,440 --> 00:22:53,040 Speaker 1: identify a change in his in his personality. Oh, Doc's 487 00:22:53,040 --> 00:22:56,280 Speaker 1: always here, he's always happy, he's talking, he's he's really 488 00:22:56,280 --> 00:22:59,400 Speaker 1: involved in everything going on. Then you know, like last week, Doc, 489 00:22:59,640 --> 00:23:01,119 Speaker 1: I don't know, and he didn't show up to work, 490 00:23:01,400 --> 00:23:04,520 Speaker 1: he didn't call. You know, he's quiet, he's not talking 491 00:23:04,520 --> 00:23:06,840 Speaker 1: to anybody. Does somebody know me well enough to be 492 00:23:06,880 --> 00:23:10,480 Speaker 1: able to identify to know my personality or cared enough 493 00:23:10,720 --> 00:23:13,960 Speaker 1: to know my personality well enough to identify that change 494 00:23:14,400 --> 00:23:17,080 Speaker 1: that baseline. Do they have that baseline of what this 495 00:23:17,280 --> 00:23:20,119 Speaker 1: kid or soldier is like. So I think as a 496 00:23:20,160 --> 00:23:22,560 Speaker 1: parent or as a coach, he goes back to not 497 00:23:22,600 --> 00:23:25,920 Speaker 1: just looking at them as players, but looking at them 498 00:23:26,000 --> 00:23:29,639 Speaker 1: on the human side and really spending the time talking 499 00:23:29,640 --> 00:23:31,800 Speaker 1: to him, getting to know them, so you could really 500 00:23:31,880 --> 00:23:35,000 Speaker 1: learn the baseline of when he's doing good. This is 501 00:23:35,040 --> 00:23:38,359 Speaker 1: what good looks like for Johnny. So when Johnny starts 502 00:23:38,359 --> 00:23:40,399 Speaker 1: doing things that are outside of his character, outside of 503 00:23:40,440 --> 00:23:43,960 Speaker 1: his norm, that coach or that leader or that teammate, right, 504 00:23:44,240 --> 00:23:46,920 Speaker 1: I mean it could be teammates, you know, looking out 505 00:23:46,920 --> 00:23:49,119 Speaker 1: for his buddy, like Son's wrong with Johnny. You know, 506 00:23:49,160 --> 00:23:50,640 Speaker 1: he's a little bit different. I was having to catch 507 00:23:50,640 --> 00:23:53,919 Speaker 1: with him, right, he's quiet. So I think it's just 508 00:23:54,480 --> 00:23:59,119 Speaker 1: hearing enough to learn about people outside of the job 509 00:23:59,280 --> 00:24:02,840 Speaker 1: or outside of the store, outside of the game, outside 510 00:24:02,840 --> 00:24:06,639 Speaker 1: of the you know, training. If that makes sense, Nick, I. 511 00:24:06,680 --> 00:24:09,240 Speaker 2: Think it makes complete sense. And I applaud you, and 512 00:24:09,280 --> 00:24:11,560 Speaker 2: I think it's so important of the work that you're doing, 513 00:24:11,600 --> 00:24:14,439 Speaker 2: and you know with you know, with team track what 514 00:24:14,480 --> 00:24:16,280 Speaker 2: they're doing as far as you know, being able to 515 00:24:16,320 --> 00:24:18,760 Speaker 2: be a resource to show others that you're being vulnerable. 516 00:24:18,760 --> 00:24:19,920 Speaker 2: I think it's just I don't think it could be 517 00:24:19,960 --> 00:24:23,240 Speaker 2: talked about enough because, uh, you know, decades and decades 518 00:24:23,240 --> 00:24:25,920 Speaker 2: and decades of stick your chest out. You're a man. 519 00:24:26,000 --> 00:24:29,160 Speaker 2: You know, we don't talk about men don't cry. It's like, man, 520 00:24:29,240 --> 00:24:31,840 Speaker 2: some of the greatest moments of my life, I know, 521 00:24:31,880 --> 00:24:34,600 Speaker 2: from my own personal growth have been in the most 522 00:24:34,720 --> 00:24:39,000 Speaker 2: you know, the most vulnerable circumstances where I wanted to hide, 523 00:24:39,040 --> 00:24:40,680 Speaker 2: but I had to face my fear and I had 524 00:24:40,680 --> 00:24:43,720 Speaker 2: to deal with those emotions. And you know, on the 525 00:24:43,760 --> 00:24:45,920 Speaker 2: other side of that, someone puts their armorround you and 526 00:24:45,960 --> 00:24:47,440 Speaker 2: tells you, hey, it's going to be all right. And 527 00:24:47,520 --> 00:24:51,160 Speaker 2: next thing, you know, this for me, I know something 528 00:24:51,160 --> 00:24:52,879 Speaker 2: that may have been eating me a lot. Now this 529 00:24:53,040 --> 00:24:56,040 Speaker 2: weight is gone, or at least I realize I'm not alone, 530 00:24:56,080 --> 00:24:58,119 Speaker 2: and there's so much strength in that. So man, I 531 00:24:58,160 --> 00:25:02,760 Speaker 2: applage you. WHI so critical. And also you know, I 532 00:25:03,400 --> 00:25:07,159 Speaker 2: know that a while ago you started the hobby of 533 00:25:07,200 --> 00:25:10,000 Speaker 2: what kind of woodworking and stuff and sounds like that 534 00:25:10,000 --> 00:25:12,280 Speaker 2: that was kind of like a safe refuge for you. 535 00:25:12,359 --> 00:25:15,320 Speaker 2: But now it's turned into this like blowing up business. 536 00:25:15,359 --> 00:25:18,480 Speaker 2: Hard af wood designs like walk us through that man, 537 00:25:18,520 --> 00:25:20,680 Speaker 2: I love what you're doing. And did it start off 538 00:25:20,680 --> 00:25:23,480 Speaker 2: as something to kind of give you some mental therapy 539 00:25:23,640 --> 00:25:26,320 Speaker 2: and the hobby and just turned into this you know business. 540 00:25:27,359 --> 00:25:31,000 Speaker 1: Yeah, I'll be honest with you. It saved my life, 541 00:25:31,880 --> 00:25:35,040 Speaker 1: it did. It saved my life. And this is also 542 00:25:35,080 --> 00:25:38,720 Speaker 1: a good example how being on teams and sports and 543 00:25:38,800 --> 00:25:40,440 Speaker 1: what I do and what I did in the military, 544 00:25:40,600 --> 00:25:43,520 Speaker 1: are they do mirror themselves. You know, how many professional 545 00:25:43,520 --> 00:25:46,960 Speaker 1: athletes do you know they retire that two years later 546 00:25:47,040 --> 00:25:50,080 Speaker 1: you hear maybe they commits suicide or they're depressed, or 547 00:25:50,080 --> 00:25:52,800 Speaker 1: they lose everything right because they lose that identity. Their 548 00:25:52,840 --> 00:25:55,800 Speaker 1: identity was this professional athlete in the spotlight, and now 549 00:25:55,800 --> 00:25:59,239 Speaker 1: all of a sudden, they're just a regular person, you know. 550 00:25:59,280 --> 00:26:01,679 Speaker 1: And that's what guys struggled with the Special Forces. They 551 00:26:01,720 --> 00:26:03,800 Speaker 1: got the green beret on, they got the uniform with 552 00:26:03,840 --> 00:26:06,000 Speaker 1: all their patches. You know, they kind of high, but 553 00:26:06,440 --> 00:26:09,480 Speaker 1: not high, but that's their identity. So much pride is 554 00:26:09,520 --> 00:26:12,080 Speaker 1: in that identity and in who they are and what 555 00:26:12,119 --> 00:26:14,359 Speaker 1: they've achieved. And then the next day they step out 556 00:26:14,400 --> 00:26:16,400 Speaker 1: of their house and there's no more uniform and they 557 00:26:16,400 --> 00:26:18,439 Speaker 1: look in the mirror and there's no more green Beret. 558 00:26:18,840 --> 00:26:21,160 Speaker 1: It's just you. And that's what I dealt with. That's 559 00:26:21,280 --> 00:26:25,600 Speaker 1: that was a struggle. A challenge for me was I lost. 560 00:26:25,760 --> 00:26:27,800 Speaker 1: I had no purpose. You know, you go from leading 561 00:26:27,840 --> 00:26:31,280 Speaker 1: guys in combat and so you have so much responsibility 562 00:26:31,280 --> 00:26:34,520 Speaker 1: and so so many things that you're you're responsible for, 563 00:26:35,080 --> 00:26:37,840 Speaker 1: and then the next day there's nothing. And for the 564 00:26:37,880 --> 00:26:40,320 Speaker 1: first couple of years I was struggling with that. I 565 00:26:40,359 --> 00:26:42,120 Speaker 1: was struggling hard with it. I feel like I didn't 566 00:26:42,119 --> 00:26:44,199 Speaker 1: have a purpose. I didn't have a goal. You know, 567 00:26:44,200 --> 00:26:47,080 Speaker 1: throughout your whole career, the Army gives you goals. Make 568 00:26:47,160 --> 00:26:49,320 Speaker 1: this rank, Oh, you made that rank, here's another rank. 569 00:26:49,400 --> 00:26:51,760 Speaker 1: Go to this school, like you constantly have things to 570 00:26:51,760 --> 00:26:54,000 Speaker 1: shoot for. You go to this school. Well, now you 571 00:26:54,080 --> 00:26:56,240 Speaker 1: go to this school and become even better. And when 572 00:26:56,280 --> 00:26:58,639 Speaker 1: that's taken away from guys like us, I think that 573 00:26:58,720 --> 00:27:01,760 Speaker 1: are you know, motivated and you know you're driven by 574 00:27:01,760 --> 00:27:05,400 Speaker 1: that success. When it's gone, it leaves you, It leaves 575 00:27:05,440 --> 00:27:09,080 Speaker 1: you kind of empty inside. And it's funny. I just 576 00:27:09,760 --> 00:27:11,520 Speaker 1: I didn't mean to do it. I just started working 577 00:27:11,520 --> 00:27:14,120 Speaker 1: on working on wood one day in the garage and 578 00:27:14,200 --> 00:27:16,880 Speaker 1: I liked it, and it was it was kind of 579 00:27:17,200 --> 00:27:19,359 Speaker 1: you know. Where I struggle with my mental health, nick is, 580 00:27:20,040 --> 00:27:22,679 Speaker 1: and I'm sure a lot of people do, is staying 581 00:27:22,680 --> 00:27:25,159 Speaker 1: in the present. I'm either in the past or I'm 582 00:27:25,200 --> 00:27:28,760 Speaker 1: in the future. Yep, you know. I a therapist tell me, like, 583 00:27:28,880 --> 00:27:31,919 Speaker 1: when you eat, enjoy your food. Chew it, chew it, 584 00:27:32,040 --> 00:27:35,640 Speaker 1: chew everybody ten times, like, enjoy your food. Don't think 585 00:27:35,640 --> 00:27:37,480 Speaker 1: about what you have to do after you eat. That's 586 00:27:37,520 --> 00:27:39,600 Speaker 1: what I do. I just eat because I'm hungry. I 587 00:27:39,600 --> 00:27:42,680 Speaker 1: don't eat to enjoy the food. And it's and she's 588 00:27:42,680 --> 00:27:44,680 Speaker 1: a hundred I understand what she was trying to say. 589 00:27:44,920 --> 00:27:48,040 Speaker 1: It's enjoy them now and being the now. And I 590 00:27:48,560 --> 00:27:51,399 Speaker 1: have not been able to do that for many, many years. 591 00:27:51,640 --> 00:27:54,720 Speaker 1: And and that's what it gave me. I noticed when 592 00:27:54,720 --> 00:27:57,560 Speaker 1: I started doing it, I was literally stuck in the 593 00:27:57,600 --> 00:28:01,640 Speaker 1: present and focused on this task of creating whatever else creating. 594 00:28:01,840 --> 00:28:04,000 Speaker 1: And I felt good, you know, when it was done. 595 00:28:04,000 --> 00:28:06,919 Speaker 1: I had a sense of accomplishment. It just was all healthy, 596 00:28:06,920 --> 00:28:09,840 Speaker 1: it was all positive, and I ended up being good 597 00:28:09,880 --> 00:28:13,359 Speaker 1: at it, you know. And that's just the qualities I 598 00:28:13,480 --> 00:28:16,399 Speaker 1: learned from playing sports and hard work and determination and 599 00:28:16,840 --> 00:28:21,000 Speaker 1: you know, finishing things, you know, to completion. Those were 600 00:28:21,080 --> 00:28:25,160 Speaker 1: all characteristics that made me successful with this wop business. 601 00:28:26,160 --> 00:28:27,679 Speaker 1: And it's been like a new it's been like a 602 00:28:27,680 --> 00:28:30,119 Speaker 1: breath of pressure. Are really I feel reborn, like I 603 00:28:30,160 --> 00:28:33,440 Speaker 1: have this. I've been able to almost close I think 604 00:28:33,440 --> 00:28:35,600 Speaker 1: Team trek Is has helped me with this as well, 605 00:28:35,920 --> 00:28:38,560 Speaker 1: almost turn the page in this book and close that 606 00:28:38,640 --> 00:28:42,080 Speaker 1: chapter and start a new one, which has been big 607 00:28:42,120 --> 00:28:42,280 Speaker 1: for me. 608 00:28:42,360 --> 00:28:45,480 Speaker 2: Nick, that's amazing. And speaking of book, I mean I 609 00:28:45,560 --> 00:28:47,520 Speaker 2: heard in the pod and now when we talked at 610 00:28:48,120 --> 00:28:49,640 Speaker 2: you started putting pen to paper. 611 00:28:50,520 --> 00:28:52,800 Speaker 1: I did. I did. Actually I talked to the editor 612 00:28:52,880 --> 00:28:56,600 Speaker 1: yesterday and things are moving forward, is looking very very good. 613 00:28:56,640 --> 00:28:59,080 Speaker 1: I just started another another thing I do is I 614 00:28:59,080 --> 00:29:01,920 Speaker 1: tried and journal, you know, get thoughts out on paper. 615 00:29:02,080 --> 00:29:05,160 Speaker 1: It's healthy, it works for me. And I just started writing. 616 00:29:05,440 --> 00:29:08,280 Speaker 1: Team kind of brought up these memories and you know 617 00:29:08,320 --> 00:29:10,920 Speaker 1: it does have a hard time sleeping, and so I 618 00:29:10,920 --> 00:29:12,840 Speaker 1: started put them on paper just to get them out. 619 00:29:13,040 --> 00:29:15,920 Speaker 1: And then I started put them in chuntological order, and 620 00:29:15,920 --> 00:29:18,600 Speaker 1: I'm like, man, these are great stories. And I started 621 00:29:18,600 --> 00:29:21,920 Speaker 1: looking into writing a book and contact some people and 622 00:29:21,920 --> 00:29:24,440 Speaker 1: before you know it, the ball is rolling. So the 623 00:29:24,480 --> 00:29:26,720 Speaker 1: title of the book is from the Battlefield to the war, 624 00:29:27,320 --> 00:29:31,400 Speaker 1: and basically it's it's my journey. It's not a war book. 625 00:29:31,440 --> 00:29:33,920 Speaker 1: It's not about war stories. I made it very clear 626 00:29:33,920 --> 00:29:35,440 Speaker 1: to that that's not what I wanted. I want this 627 00:29:35,600 --> 00:29:38,240 Speaker 1: the mental health self help book for guys like me 628 00:29:38,680 --> 00:29:43,680 Speaker 1: that suffered trauma, retired from the military and didn't realize that, 629 00:29:44,440 --> 00:29:46,880 Speaker 1: like I didn't realize, you know, I left the battlefield. 630 00:29:46,880 --> 00:29:48,880 Speaker 1: I don't have to go there anymore, which is great, 631 00:29:49,080 --> 00:29:51,040 Speaker 1: and I can move on, you know, to the sunset, 632 00:29:51,120 --> 00:29:55,160 Speaker 1: rainbows and unicorns. But when you know, when that retirement 633 00:29:55,240 --> 00:29:58,320 Speaker 1: came and I stepped looking for those rainbows and unicorns, 634 00:29:58,720 --> 00:30:02,480 Speaker 1: all I found was war that was worse than the battlefield. 635 00:30:02,600 --> 00:30:05,040 Speaker 1: You know, I'll go back to Afghancian any day to 636 00:30:05,360 --> 00:30:08,600 Speaker 1: uh then this war, you know, this war in my head, 637 00:30:08,960 --> 00:30:12,280 Speaker 1: this war with myself and struggling with self worth. And then, 638 00:30:12,400 --> 00:30:14,520 Speaker 1: you know, the older I get, the more you reflect 639 00:30:14,520 --> 00:30:16,680 Speaker 1: on things you did over there and a lot of 640 00:30:16,720 --> 00:30:19,400 Speaker 1: things that I wasn't ready for. And you know, it 641 00:30:19,440 --> 00:30:21,240 Speaker 1: took me to some dark places. I had to fight 642 00:30:21,280 --> 00:30:23,959 Speaker 1: through some dark places to get where I am today. 643 00:30:24,560 --> 00:30:28,320 Speaker 1: And I'm lucky. I'm lucky that I was able to 644 00:30:28,360 --> 00:30:31,640 Speaker 1: do that. If it wasn't for some key people at 645 00:30:31,640 --> 00:30:35,000 Speaker 1: some key times being there for me when I needed 646 00:30:35,040 --> 00:30:39,520 Speaker 1: it most. I probably want to be here anymore, you know. 647 00:30:39,560 --> 00:30:41,000 Speaker 1: But there's a lot of guys out there that don't 648 00:30:41,000 --> 00:30:44,160 Speaker 1: have that. They don't have that savior or that angel 649 00:30:44,200 --> 00:30:47,440 Speaker 1: that comes down and picks them up and it brings 650 00:30:47,480 --> 00:30:49,760 Speaker 1: them somewhere and get some help. A lot of guys 651 00:30:49,760 --> 00:30:53,200 Speaker 1: don't have that. So I think this book, my intentions 652 00:30:53,200 --> 00:30:56,760 Speaker 1: of writing it is for these guys to hopefully read 653 00:30:56,800 --> 00:31:00,960 Speaker 1: it and realize they're not alone. Many people have gone 654 00:31:00,960 --> 00:31:04,600 Speaker 1: through that struggle. Many people have risen above it and 655 00:31:04,720 --> 00:31:08,040 Speaker 1: are living. You're always gonna have PTSD, We're always gonna 656 00:31:08,080 --> 00:31:10,640 Speaker 1: have issues, We're always gonna have those things going on 657 00:31:10,720 --> 00:31:13,800 Speaker 1: in our lives. But there's things that you can do. 658 00:31:14,440 --> 00:31:18,880 Speaker 1: There's steps you can take, and there's groups and fellowship 659 00:31:18,960 --> 00:31:21,880 Speaker 1: with other vets that you know what you have PTSD 660 00:31:21,960 --> 00:31:25,320 Speaker 1: boot through that holistic approach of being healthy. It brings 661 00:31:25,320 --> 00:31:28,080 Speaker 1: it down to a manageable level. You know, your life 662 00:31:28,120 --> 00:31:31,040 Speaker 1: isn't unmanageable anymore. It's actually manageable and you can find 663 00:31:31,040 --> 00:31:33,680 Speaker 1: some joy in it. So that that's the that's the 664 00:31:33,720 --> 00:31:34,680 Speaker 1: mission of that book. 665 00:31:35,280 --> 00:31:38,600 Speaker 2: Dude, that's that's amazing that you're I mean, it's clearly 666 00:31:39,360 --> 00:31:41,920 Speaker 2: you're just trying to help other people, you know, by 667 00:31:41,960 --> 00:31:45,040 Speaker 2: coming on and sharing with us, with me, you're you're 668 00:31:45,040 --> 00:31:48,360 Speaker 2: gonna help other people. I mean, you know, listen, at 669 00:31:48,360 --> 00:31:51,040 Speaker 2: the end of the day, we're talking sports, we're talking 670 00:31:51,080 --> 00:31:53,600 Speaker 2: all these different things, parenting, helping people. But I mean 671 00:31:53,880 --> 00:31:56,560 Speaker 2: we're talking about life. You know, we're talking about real 672 00:31:56,600 --> 00:32:00,520 Speaker 2: life and how everything kind of helps one another. These 673 00:32:00,640 --> 00:32:03,840 Speaker 2: lessons that kids learn, and as parents we can take 674 00:32:03,880 --> 00:32:07,640 Speaker 2: this information your experience and be able to recognize and 675 00:32:07,680 --> 00:32:09,640 Speaker 2: be able to help. And I just applaud you for 676 00:32:09,720 --> 00:32:12,920 Speaker 2: not only you know, your unbelievable service to our country, 677 00:32:12,960 --> 00:32:15,760 Speaker 2: but also you know what you're doing now, getting vulnerable 678 00:32:15,800 --> 00:32:20,520 Speaker 2: and showing people and veterans and anybody anybody who's out 679 00:32:20,520 --> 00:32:23,360 Speaker 2: there who thinks they can't talk to anybody, they're not alone, 680 00:32:23,440 --> 00:32:25,200 Speaker 2: you know what I mean. But someone like you, who's 681 00:32:25,240 --> 00:32:28,239 Speaker 2: as strong and who's been where you're ben, it's just 682 00:32:28,400 --> 00:32:30,120 Speaker 2: it's extremely powerful coming from you. 683 00:32:30,760 --> 00:32:33,040 Speaker 1: Yeah, thanks, nig I appreciate the opportunity to get on 684 00:32:33,120 --> 00:32:35,200 Speaker 1: here and get that message out because you're right, does 685 00:32:35,280 --> 00:32:36,800 Speaker 1: a matter if your soldier as a matter of your 686 00:32:36,840 --> 00:32:40,040 Speaker 1: thirteen year old kid playing baseball. You know, both those 687 00:32:40,080 --> 00:32:44,000 Speaker 1: guys think that they're alone. They think that they're the 688 00:32:44,000 --> 00:32:47,480 Speaker 1: only ones that have this problem, and you know, and 689 00:32:47,720 --> 00:32:50,120 Speaker 1: it's sad because and I was there. I was there. 690 00:32:50,280 --> 00:32:53,480 Speaker 1: I was isolated, thinking that nobody knows what I'm talking about, 691 00:32:53,560 --> 00:32:56,520 Speaker 1: nobody understands what I'm going through. And how wrong could 692 00:32:56,560 --> 00:32:59,080 Speaker 1: I be because I was taking to a place where 693 00:32:59,120 --> 00:33:01,160 Speaker 1: there are many people with that struggle, and all you 694 00:33:01,200 --> 00:33:03,120 Speaker 1: had to do is talk to him, you know. So 695 00:33:03,400 --> 00:33:06,000 Speaker 1: I think that's important for kids, for for everybody to 696 00:33:06,080 --> 00:33:08,479 Speaker 1: understand that you're not alone no matter what your struggle is. 697 00:33:08,920 --> 00:33:10,000 Speaker 1: We've been through it. 698 00:33:10,640 --> 00:33:13,120 Speaker 2: Matt Doc. Where can people find you? You know, what 699 00:33:13,520 --> 00:33:15,480 Speaker 2: are your where? Where can they find that they want 700 00:33:15,480 --> 00:33:18,640 Speaker 2: to follow? I mean you're making these ridiculous custom surfboards 701 00:33:18,640 --> 00:33:21,600 Speaker 2: and all this different stuff, Like where can people follow you? 702 00:33:21,840 --> 00:33:23,600 Speaker 2: See your content, see what you're doing? 703 00:33:24,080 --> 00:33:28,200 Speaker 1: Yeah? Best is on Instagram Hardy f Wood Designs. Just 704 00:33:28,240 --> 00:33:30,320 Speaker 1: go on there and follow. I got all my works 705 00:33:30,480 --> 00:33:34,360 Speaker 1: posted on there, all the you know, the team trek, 706 00:33:34,400 --> 00:33:37,600 Speaker 1: the videos, everything that you need is on that Instagram. Dick. 707 00:33:38,280 --> 00:33:40,360 Speaker 2: I love it, man, If you haven't yet, go check it. 708 00:33:40,400 --> 00:33:43,440 Speaker 2: Out Team Trek. The podcast Matt Docio on there is 709 00:33:43,440 --> 00:33:46,800 Speaker 2: a three part series. It is It'll blow your hair back. 710 00:33:46,920 --> 00:33:47,120 Speaker 1: Man. 711 00:33:47,240 --> 00:33:48,840 Speaker 2: I'm just wanting to tell you this. Put your hard 712 00:33:48,840 --> 00:33:50,840 Speaker 2: hat on because it's gonna you might it might sting 713 00:33:50,840 --> 00:33:52,680 Speaker 2: a little bit listening to it, but it's real life. 714 00:33:52,680 --> 00:33:55,280 Speaker 2: And Matt Bro, I just can't think you know here 715 00:33:55,320 --> 00:33:57,160 Speaker 2: we are. Last time I saw it was at Brenha 716 00:33:57,240 --> 00:34:00,600 Speaker 2: Musey's wedding b muse But we've talked several times through 717 00:34:00,680 --> 00:34:03,680 Speaker 2: the years, and man, it's good to catch up with 718 00:34:03,720 --> 00:34:05,560 Speaker 2: the old friend. Man. I'm grateful for you coming on 719 00:34:05,640 --> 00:34:06,280 Speaker 2: and Sharon. 720 00:34:06,040 --> 00:34:08,880 Speaker 1: Bro it's awesome. Thank you so much. Nick's stay in touch. 721 00:34:09,239 --> 00:34:13,080 Speaker 2: That's retired Stargeant first Class Matthew Docio. Thanks for listening 722 00:34:13,080 --> 00:34:16,120 Speaker 2: to the Reform Sports Project podcast. I'm Nick Bonacort and 723 00:34:16,200 --> 00:34:18,640 Speaker 2: our goal is to restore a healthy balance and perspective 724 00:34:18,800 --> 00:34:22,680 Speaker 2: in all areas of sport through education and advocacy. For updates, 725 00:34:22,719 --> 00:34:26,040 Speaker 2: please follow us on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram, or check 726 00:34:26,040 --> 00:34:28,880 Speaker 2: out our website by searching for the Reform Sports Project