Speaker 1: Welcome to Before Breakfast, a production of I Heart Radio.
Speaker 1: Good Morning, This is Laura. Welcome to the Before Breakfast podcast.
Speaker 1: Today's tip is to keep small things small. Not everything
Speaker 1: warrants a big response. And by keeping small things small,
Speaker 1: as the saying goes, you save your time and energy
Speaker 1: for things that truly do warrant your attention. You'll probably
Speaker 1: be happier too. If you're like most people, you no
Speaker 1: doubt find yourself annoyed when things in life aren't quite right.
Speaker 1: I know I do. Maybe your neighbor leaves his garbage
Speaker 1: bins on the curb for days, or maybe your workplace
Speaker 1: sends pointless email newsletters that you can't unsubscribe from. If
Speaker 1: you're listening to this podcast, my guess is that you
Speaker 1: have high standards for yourself and you try to find
Speaker 1: solutions to problems that come up in your life. That's
Speaker 1: generally a good thing. Sometimes, though, our attempts to find
Speaker 1: solutions can cost more than the problems they're trying to solve.
Speaker 1: That's when it pays to keep small things small. The
Speaker 1: first way to keep small things small is to recognize
Speaker 1: them as small things. Ask yourself, how much does this
Speaker 1: affect my life or the lives of the people I
Speaker 1: care about. Sometimes the answer will be not much. These
Speaker 1: are occasions to practice patients. You can smile after someone
Speaker 1: cuts in front of you in the line to exit
Speaker 1: from the highway. Maybe the person is a thoughtless jerk,
Speaker 1: or maybe it's a tourist in a rental car who
Speaker 1: had no idea that that's where the exit was. In
Speaker 1: any case, you know that you will still get to
Speaker 1: work on time at your high paying job, or you
Speaker 1: do challenging, meaningful work alongside clever colleagues. I mean, really,
Speaker 1: what does it matter to you? If you're not sure
Speaker 1: whether you're dealing with a small thing, try what Richard Carlson,
Speaker 1: author of Don't Sweat the Small Stuff, calls the time warp.
Speaker 1: Imagine yourself a year from now, how much does this
Speaker 1: issue matter? Most likely, you won't remember your commute two
Speaker 1: days from now, let alone a year from now. Or
Speaker 1: you can ask yourself whose issue is this? Anyway, it
Speaker 1: might be nice if your colleague didn't use double exclamation
Speaker 1: points and all his emails, but this hardly reflects upon
Speaker 1: you. You You might prefer that your high schooler look a
Speaker 1: little less like she had slept in her clothes, but
Speaker 1: again to eat her own. Psychologist Wendy Mogul, in her
Speaker 1: book The Blessing of a b Minus, encourages parents to
Speaker 1: allow themselves to appreciate their kids as they figure out
Speaker 1: who they are, even when their tastes or hobbies they
Speaker 1: seem a little odd. She offers an old Hebrew prayer,
Speaker 1: thank you God for varying the creatures. The next time
Speaker 1: you find yourself about to get annoyed or want to
Speaker 1: fix something that isn't actually your problem, just say to yourself,
Speaker 1: what a world plenty of surprises and leave other people
Speaker 1: to their exclamation points or odd bawl fashion. Sometimes, though,
Speaker 1: you may feel like a small thing is having an
Speaker 1: adverse effect on you or someone else, and you feel
Speaker 1: the urge to address it. Even then, a little perspective
Speaker 1: is wise. I find it helpful to imagine how a
Speaker 1: conversation about the issue might unfold. Suppose you have a
Speaker 1: monthly conference call that consistently starts ten minutes late. You
Speaker 1: faithfully log on at the scheduled time, only to spend
Speaker 1: ten minutes talking about the weather. As you think about
Speaker 1: bringing this up with the person who convenes the call,
Speaker 1: try to imagine what you would say try to imagine
Speaker 1: how he might respond. Are you feeling stumped about what
Speaker 1: you might say? That doesn't sound petty about this ten
Speaker 1: minutes every month? Or you have to talk about the weather.
Speaker 1: If so, plan for the delay, come up with your
Speaker 1: best weather jokes, or just dial in late yourself. Other times, though,
Speaker 1: imagining the conversation will help you figure out how to
Speaker 1: keep a small thing in perspective while constructively addressing its.
Speaker 1: Suppose you frequently learned about special programs at your kids
Speaker 1: school just a few days before you either scramble to
Speaker 1: rearrange your work schedule or your kids are disappointed when
Speaker 1: you can't be there. At first blush, you might think
Speaker 1: to respond to the teacher's next email with your frustration
Speaker 1: about this, but that might make the teacher feel guilty
Speaker 1: and probably doesn't help the long term goal of a
Speaker 1: good relationship, so instead you envision another option. When you
Speaker 1: have a hunch that there's an event coming up, you
Speaker 1: reach out to your child's teacher to ask if there's
Speaker 1: something you should anticipate. Hello, Mrs Rogers. With springbreak around
Speaker 1: the corner, I wondered if there might be a class party.
Speaker 1: I'm eager to get it on the calendar so I
Speaker 1: can arrange my schedule to attend. Hopefully that will elicit
Speaker 1: at least tentative information and maybe even nudge the teacher
Speaker 1: to give a little more notice for special events in
Speaker 1: the future. You kept the small things small while still
Speaker 1: addressing an issue that was bothering you. How do you
Speaker 1: manage to keep small things small in your life? You
Speaker 1: can let me know at Before Breakfast podcast at i
Speaker 1: heeart media dot com. In the meantime, this is Laura.
Speaker 1: Thanks for listening and here's to making the most of
Speaker 1: our time. Hey, everybody, I'd love to hear from you.
Speaker 1: You can send me your tips, your questions, or anything else.
Speaker 1: Just connect with me on Twitter, Facebook and Instagram at
Speaker 1: Before Breakfast pod. That's b the number four then Breakfast
Speaker 1: p o D. You can also shoot me an email
Speaker 1: at Before Breakfast podcast at i heeart media dot com.
Speaker 1: That Before Breakfast is spelled out with all the letters.
Speaker 1: Thanks so much, should I look forward to staying in touch.
Speaker 1: Before Breakfast is a production of I Heart Radio. For
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