1 00:00:02,279 --> 00:00:03,160 Speaker 1: Hey there, everybody. 2 00:00:03,240 --> 00:00:06,720 Speaker 2: Welcome to Amy and TJ, and we are continuing our 3 00:00:07,280 --> 00:00:10,120 Speaker 2: very interesting conversation with the one and only Cheryl Burke. 4 00:00:10,720 --> 00:00:12,880 Speaker 2: I'm curious you said you went through two divorces in 5 00:00:12,920 --> 00:00:16,520 Speaker 2: twenty twenty two, Dancing with the Stars and your now 6 00:00:16,560 --> 00:00:17,239 Speaker 2: ex husband. 7 00:00:17,400 --> 00:00:21,280 Speaker 1: Which one was harder dancing with the Stars? Bye? I mean, 8 00:00:21,440 --> 00:00:25,560 Speaker 1: hands down, you can't compare. Wow. 9 00:00:26,360 --> 00:00:29,160 Speaker 3: That's not to suggest that your divorce from your husband 10 00:00:29,200 --> 00:00:29,680 Speaker 3: was easy. 11 00:00:30,200 --> 00:00:30,840 Speaker 1: Absolutely not. 12 00:00:31,000 --> 00:00:33,720 Speaker 3: It wasn't. That's not an easy thing. Yeah, help us 13 00:00:33,800 --> 00:00:37,040 Speaker 3: with context there. We think about a marriage and then 14 00:00:38,080 --> 00:00:43,239 Speaker 3: some career change, right, So why was that experience with 15 00:00:43,320 --> 00:00:46,760 Speaker 3: Dancing with the Stars so much more difficult painful to 16 00:00:46,880 --> 00:00:47,240 Speaker 3: go through? 17 00:00:47,880 --> 00:00:50,159 Speaker 1: It was my I defined that was my identity, like 18 00:00:50,240 --> 00:00:52,919 Speaker 1: I think it was they actually, you know as well, 19 00:00:52,960 --> 00:00:55,840 Speaker 1: I credit them for giving me a voice in general, 20 00:00:55,920 --> 00:00:58,080 Speaker 1: like if I don't know if you if you' you 21 00:00:58,160 --> 00:01:00,560 Speaker 1: see my social but like I post did my very 22 00:01:00,560 --> 00:01:03,400 Speaker 1: first audition and I didn't have like I literally didn't 23 00:01:03,440 --> 00:01:06,320 Speaker 1: have a voice, like I had an English accent with 24 00:01:06,319 --> 00:01:09,880 Speaker 1: like who is this girl? And but like I never 25 00:01:09,920 --> 00:01:14,560 Speaker 1: thought I could ever be my own independent woman back then. 26 00:01:16,000 --> 00:01:19,880 Speaker 1: Ballroom is very much it's a partnership, and it's always 27 00:01:19,920 --> 00:01:23,319 Speaker 1: the men that are in control. Still, Like I know 28 00:01:23,400 --> 00:01:25,800 Speaker 1: it sounds so old school, but like, but that's also 29 00:01:25,840 --> 00:01:28,560 Speaker 1: the beauty of ballroom, Like the man leads, the one follows, 30 00:01:28,560 --> 00:01:32,080 Speaker 1: and then you've produced such beautiful art and then that 31 00:01:32,240 --> 00:01:34,160 Speaker 1: just I'm not saying it happens with everyone, but like 32 00:01:34,200 --> 00:01:36,319 Speaker 1: for me, it was very much like that. And so 33 00:01:36,400 --> 00:01:39,840 Speaker 1: I think coming into my own and being able to 34 00:01:39,840 --> 00:01:41,720 Speaker 1: stay on my own two feet, I credit Dancing with 35 00:01:41,720 --> 00:01:43,679 Speaker 1: the Stars for that, and I think because they've seen 36 00:01:43,720 --> 00:01:47,160 Speaker 1: me through it all, like it all like I've grown 37 00:01:47,280 --> 00:01:52,720 Speaker 1: up in front. It's like, yeah, it's hard, it's hard. 38 00:01:52,880 --> 00:01:55,800 Speaker 1: You were twenty one when you started, and I started 39 00:01:55,840 --> 00:01:58,520 Speaker 1: out clubbing and then I was like, oh my god, 40 00:01:58,880 --> 00:02:04,920 Speaker 1: party girl by night, ballroom dancer by day. Were like, 41 00:02:06,960 --> 00:02:10,959 Speaker 1: you're about to turn for it, like in a matter 42 00:02:11,040 --> 00:02:14,639 Speaker 1: of days. Days. Yeah, I'm excited. What does that mean 43 00:02:14,960 --> 00:02:18,400 Speaker 1: to you? I feel like I'm a cat. I've lived 44 00:02:18,560 --> 00:02:25,800 Speaker 1: nine lives, But it means that it's time to move forward, 45 00:02:26,000 --> 00:02:29,280 Speaker 1: like really evolve and just continue on this path of 46 00:02:29,560 --> 00:02:33,240 Speaker 1: the unknown, which is scarish, but it is what we 47 00:02:33,280 --> 00:02:36,040 Speaker 1: all go through regardless. We're on that path to let 48 00:02:36,120 --> 00:02:38,320 Speaker 1: us know if you figure it out. Never I mean, 49 00:02:38,600 --> 00:02:40,839 Speaker 1: I would be writing a handbook if I could write, 50 00:02:40,919 --> 00:02:42,480 Speaker 1: like I'd make a lot of money doing that if 51 00:02:42,480 --> 00:02:45,080 Speaker 1: there was Oh my gosh. But at least you have 52 00:02:45,120 --> 00:02:45,880 Speaker 1: each other, right. 53 00:02:45,919 --> 00:02:48,720 Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean, I will say this, It's not that 54 00:02:48,760 --> 00:02:52,880 Speaker 2: you wish anyone to go through tough times, but when 55 00:02:52,919 --> 00:02:55,760 Speaker 2: people do it publicly and you've been in that situation, 56 00:02:56,040 --> 00:02:59,280 Speaker 2: there is comfort that you give people who have been 57 00:02:59,320 --> 00:03:01,760 Speaker 2: fans of yours forever or even the two of us, 58 00:03:01,960 --> 00:03:04,120 Speaker 2: when you see someone else struggling or going through a 59 00:03:04,160 --> 00:03:06,959 Speaker 2: journey where they're really trying to figure things out, where 60 00:03:06,960 --> 00:03:10,600 Speaker 2: they have their whole world's implode, and they and they 61 00:03:10,680 --> 00:03:13,680 Speaker 2: still get up each morning and they still keep trying, 62 00:03:13,720 --> 00:03:15,440 Speaker 2: and they still keep trying to. 63 00:03:15,360 --> 00:03:16,400 Speaker 1: Do better and learn. 64 00:03:16,840 --> 00:03:19,040 Speaker 2: That's inspiring in and of itself. I think that's the 65 00:03:19,080 --> 00:03:21,919 Speaker 2: hardest thing you've probably ever done. It's the hardest thing 66 00:03:22,000 --> 00:03:24,120 Speaker 2: I've ever done. It's to start over. 67 00:03:24,400 --> 00:03:26,639 Speaker 1: Yeah, no, it is. And then to be able to 68 00:03:26,720 --> 00:03:29,360 Speaker 1: voice it because some people may not ever be able to. 69 00:03:30,240 --> 00:03:33,000 Speaker 1: And I think that is what is incouraged. Like when 70 00:03:33,040 --> 00:03:37,480 Speaker 1: when times are tough and you feel like you don't 71 00:03:37,480 --> 00:03:39,320 Speaker 1: want to get out of bed, or you just want 72 00:03:39,320 --> 00:03:41,920 Speaker 1: to give up, Like I definitely think about that, and 73 00:03:41,960 --> 00:03:45,080 Speaker 1: thank you both for being so vulnerable, like it helps 74 00:03:45,120 --> 00:03:46,720 Speaker 1: so much, you. 75 00:03:46,760 --> 00:03:48,840 Speaker 3: Know, it's some of that. Don't give us too much credit. Man, 76 00:03:48,840 --> 00:03:53,200 Speaker 3: We didn't have a choice but to be at a choice. 77 00:03:53,200 --> 00:03:55,440 Speaker 3: But it's taken us a little while, but we have 78 00:03:55,600 --> 00:03:58,360 Speaker 3: come around and to be around people. 79 00:03:58,600 --> 00:03:58,720 Speaker 4: Right. 80 00:03:58,760 --> 00:04:00,360 Speaker 3: I don't know how you felt about it, but we 81 00:04:00,400 --> 00:04:01,400 Speaker 3: walked around for so long. 82 00:04:01,640 --> 00:04:02,200 Speaker 1: It's important. 83 00:04:05,000 --> 00:04:08,000 Speaker 3: We walked around with our heads down in shamee bow 84 00:04:08,200 --> 00:04:13,200 Speaker 3: thinking everybody thought a certain way about us, and we 85 00:04:13,240 --> 00:04:17,359 Speaker 3: now and I'm curious now how they're such rabbit fans 86 00:04:17,360 --> 00:04:20,080 Speaker 3: of Dancing with the Stars and people are fans of 87 00:04:20,120 --> 00:04:23,360 Speaker 3: the show just become naturally fans of people who are 88 00:04:23,400 --> 00:04:27,000 Speaker 3: on the show. But then when people there's a divorce, 89 00:04:27,120 --> 00:04:29,080 Speaker 3: like you said, Cheryl goes this way, Dance with the 90 00:04:29,080 --> 00:04:31,400 Speaker 3: Stars goes this way, and it doesn't necessarily seem like 91 00:04:31,440 --> 00:04:35,200 Speaker 3: everybody's hunky dory. People have a tendency to take picksides. 92 00:04:35,480 --> 00:04:36,840 Speaker 3: I'm going to be on the side of Dancing with 93 00:04:36,880 --> 00:04:38,400 Speaker 3: the Stars of the show. I can either be a 94 00:04:38,400 --> 00:04:39,920 Speaker 3: fan of the show. I can be a fan of Cheryl. 95 00:04:39,960 --> 00:04:42,040 Speaker 3: We have people shout this on the streets to us 96 00:04:42,040 --> 00:04:45,200 Speaker 3: all the time. I'm watching that show anymore? You will? 97 00:04:45,240 --> 00:04:46,840 Speaker 3: Do you think you have it all the time. 98 00:04:47,040 --> 00:04:48,320 Speaker 2: I mean, I don't think a day goes by where 99 00:04:48,320 --> 00:04:50,040 Speaker 2: people don't say, I don't watch anymore. 100 00:04:50,400 --> 00:04:55,479 Speaker 1: Y'all keep doing you and people are New York and 101 00:04:55,520 --> 00:04:56,840 Speaker 1: do we even have a New York accent? When we 102 00:04:56,880 --> 00:04:59,320 Speaker 1: did that, I love it, though that's a lot of 103 00:04:59,400 --> 00:05:02,560 Speaker 1: fans say to you, I'm sure you get the New 104 00:05:02,640 --> 00:05:06,120 Speaker 1: York act. Now I need to move back there. Maybe no, 105 00:05:06,400 --> 00:05:08,560 Speaker 1: but like I do, like, Okay, for example, I was 106 00:05:08,600 --> 00:05:11,159 Speaker 1: just messing around, but I was dancing. I'm like a 107 00:05:11,200 --> 00:05:13,680 Speaker 1: segment host for the Jennifer Hudson Show, and I ran 108 00:05:13,720 --> 00:05:16,520 Speaker 1: into I don't know if you know him, but Marcelle. 109 00:05:16,560 --> 00:05:18,400 Speaker 1: He's like a very very famous he was friends with 110 00:05:18,400 --> 00:05:21,280 Speaker 1: the Demilios, are still still friends. But we were dancing 111 00:05:21,320 --> 00:05:24,480 Speaker 1: and messing around. I was like contest season thirty three, 112 00:05:24,520 --> 00:05:27,160 Speaker 1: here we come. And people were like, so people think 113 00:05:27,160 --> 00:05:30,320 Speaker 1: I'm coming back, right, So I just like, and I 114 00:05:30,400 --> 00:05:32,039 Speaker 1: just don't know how to address this because I was like, 115 00:05:32,040 --> 00:05:35,000 Speaker 1: I don't want to like, I was clearly just choking. 116 00:05:35,120 --> 00:05:35,920 Speaker 3: Yeah big time. 117 00:05:36,240 --> 00:05:37,720 Speaker 1: You're like, oh, my god, I can't wait. I'm gonna 118 00:05:37,800 --> 00:05:39,640 Speaker 1: I'm gonna start watching the show again. And I'm like, 119 00:05:39,800 --> 00:05:42,640 Speaker 1: oh god, I don't know what to say, so I 120 00:05:42,760 --> 00:05:45,039 Speaker 1: just haven't. I've ghosted everyone, I guess. But now that 121 00:05:45,040 --> 00:05:47,080 Speaker 1: I'm talking about it, I'm like, I should probably uh 122 00:05:47,240 --> 00:05:50,080 Speaker 1: set the record, Sta, Yeah, yeah you're not. But I 123 00:05:50,120 --> 00:05:51,080 Speaker 1: was just literally joking. 124 00:05:51,320 --> 00:05:54,320 Speaker 3: Obviously, Counsel those fans for a second, because they do 125 00:05:54,400 --> 00:05:57,840 Speaker 3: people getting I know you don't. You would never tell 126 00:05:57,880 --> 00:05:59,960 Speaker 3: somebody don't be a fan of dancing with a stif 127 00:06:00,320 --> 00:06:03,520 Speaker 3: you would never do that. But but help them resolve 128 00:06:04,080 --> 00:06:06,479 Speaker 3: their loyalty to you and their face. 129 00:06:06,880 --> 00:06:08,880 Speaker 1: And I heard it when someone's like, I don't watch 130 00:06:08,880 --> 00:06:11,120 Speaker 1: the show anymore like I would. I don't think that's 131 00:06:11,120 --> 00:06:11,560 Speaker 1: a good thing. 132 00:06:11,760 --> 00:06:14,839 Speaker 3: But help them resolve that conflict they have being loyal 133 00:06:14,880 --> 00:06:16,159 Speaker 3: to you and being loyal to the show. 134 00:06:16,160 --> 00:06:18,640 Speaker 1: It's just the show is just a beautiful show, like 135 00:06:19,360 --> 00:06:21,840 Speaker 1: with me or without me, right, But mind you, I 136 00:06:21,880 --> 00:06:25,800 Speaker 1: can't stop talking about it obviously, Like I'm just like, wait, 137 00:06:25,920 --> 00:06:27,840 Speaker 1: is this yeah, it's my therapist. I'm like, is this good? 138 00:06:27,880 --> 00:06:30,119 Speaker 1: She goes you know what, Cheryl? It is good because 139 00:06:30,160 --> 00:06:32,279 Speaker 1: normally you'd run away from it, like I would have 140 00:06:32,440 --> 00:06:36,000 Speaker 1: run the opposite way, and I would have probably numbed 141 00:06:36,360 --> 00:06:38,159 Speaker 1: this part of my life, not wanting to have to 142 00:06:38,240 --> 00:06:42,279 Speaker 1: feel or deal or face the pain because it's painful. 143 00:06:42,440 --> 00:06:46,040 Speaker 1: And I'm a professional number, and I don't necessarily always 144 00:06:46,080 --> 00:06:48,040 Speaker 1: go through you know, I don't choose that. 145 00:06:48,160 --> 00:06:51,000 Speaker 2: Get you six years sober, that's incredible. You're You're not 146 00:06:51,040 --> 00:06:53,839 Speaker 2: a professional number in that. No, No, and I'm sure 147 00:06:53,839 --> 00:06:56,720 Speaker 2: you've been tested like you couldn't have imagined this past year. 148 00:06:56,760 --> 00:06:59,159 Speaker 1: I would have loved a vodka soda at one point, 149 00:06:59,200 --> 00:07:03,240 Speaker 1: but yeah, no, it's one second at a time sometimes, 150 00:07:03,279 --> 00:07:05,200 Speaker 1: like actually sometimes most of the time lately. 151 00:07:05,400 --> 00:07:08,200 Speaker 3: We just had this conversation recently with one of your former. 152 00:07:08,040 --> 00:07:11,000 Speaker 1: Day that episode. I love him. 153 00:07:11,120 --> 00:07:13,400 Speaker 3: He talked to us about that. I'm sure you Roll's 154 00:07:13,440 --> 00:07:16,640 Speaker 3: experience at least sharing that experience together. 155 00:07:17,360 --> 00:07:19,000 Speaker 1: Yeah, And it was it was towards the beginning of 156 00:07:19,000 --> 00:07:21,000 Speaker 1: my journey, and that was when we did our first 157 00:07:21,040 --> 00:07:25,160 Speaker 1: podcast together. And yeah, it was so special. I mean, 158 00:07:25,200 --> 00:07:26,640 Speaker 1: like this is what I mean, Like we were able 159 00:07:26,640 --> 00:07:29,640 Speaker 1: to do a dance dedicated to our sobriety. Like and 160 00:07:30,000 --> 00:07:33,240 Speaker 1: then I remember one of the lighting guys like this big, 161 00:07:33,320 --> 00:07:36,200 Speaker 1: hefty man like came out to his end, was in tears, 162 00:07:36,320 --> 00:07:39,960 Speaker 1: and it's like, this is why I just freaking love 163 00:07:40,000 --> 00:07:42,760 Speaker 1: the show. Like I just love it. I love every 164 00:07:42,800 --> 00:07:48,040 Speaker 1: single freaking inch of it. But I also know that 165 00:07:48,960 --> 00:07:51,400 Speaker 1: we could be hurt, we could be disappointed, but we 166 00:07:51,400 --> 00:07:53,480 Speaker 1: could still love, like we bring that back. 167 00:07:53,560 --> 00:07:53,760 Speaker 3: You know. 168 00:07:54,120 --> 00:07:57,240 Speaker 1: It all comes down to that, Like life's so freaking short. 169 00:07:57,680 --> 00:08:00,800 Speaker 3: Everybody's sobriety journey is similar in some ways but also 170 00:08:00,960 --> 00:08:03,880 Speaker 3: very different. Yours. You said sometimes it's I remember AJ 171 00:08:04,080 --> 00:08:05,520 Speaker 3: pointed out to us, he said, Hey, I woke up 172 00:08:05,560 --> 00:08:08,280 Speaker 3: sober today. I don't know what's going to happen, no idea, 173 00:08:08,360 --> 00:08:11,560 Speaker 3: But you just said, second to second, what is especially 174 00:08:11,560 --> 00:08:15,360 Speaker 3: going through the difficulties you've had recent years, how it 175 00:08:15,400 --> 00:08:17,840 Speaker 3: does it get harder? You said, I love a vodka soda. 176 00:08:18,040 --> 00:08:23,440 Speaker 1: Yeah, and then like my stepsister just passed away. Yeah, 177 00:08:23,480 --> 00:08:30,440 Speaker 1: And yes, life tests me and everyone constantly, and I 178 00:08:30,520 --> 00:08:35,199 Speaker 1: have to be super uh present to not pick up 179 00:08:35,200 --> 00:08:35,640 Speaker 1: a drink. 180 00:08:35,760 --> 00:08:36,200 Speaker 3: Wow. 181 00:08:37,120 --> 00:08:40,040 Speaker 1: Because also when people ask me, like what has been 182 00:08:40,080 --> 00:08:43,080 Speaker 1: your rock bottom? My rock bottom was my success was 183 00:08:43,120 --> 00:08:47,079 Speaker 1: when I was drinking, Because when I was actually successful, 184 00:08:47,080 --> 00:08:49,280 Speaker 1: Like if you're going to look meaning like successful from 185 00:08:49,280 --> 00:08:51,480 Speaker 1: the outside the mirror balls. Okay, so it was like 186 00:08:51,520 --> 00:08:53,560 Speaker 1: the first two seasons back in two thousand and six, 187 00:08:54,120 --> 00:08:56,680 Speaker 1: that's when I was really drinking, Like that's when I 188 00:08:56,800 --> 00:08:59,840 Speaker 1: wasn't Maybe then I can relate to the drinking as Okay, well, 189 00:09:00,080 --> 00:09:03,000 Speaker 1: now maybe I drink because like the voices in my head, 190 00:09:03,280 --> 00:09:06,400 Speaker 1: I was overthinking, I'm overthinking, I'm overanalyzing, and I'm like, 191 00:09:06,520 --> 00:09:09,040 Speaker 1: oh my god, stop, like get out of your head. 192 00:09:09,120 --> 00:09:12,120 Speaker 1: You know, like all of it, like the perfectionism there's 193 00:09:12,120 --> 00:09:14,600 Speaker 1: no such thing, and never good enough, like being judged 194 00:09:14,640 --> 00:09:16,720 Speaker 1: my whole life from like you know, all of it, 195 00:09:17,200 --> 00:09:19,520 Speaker 1: and I'm not complaining about it. It is the path 196 00:09:19,559 --> 00:09:24,199 Speaker 1: I've chose, and I've chosen, but the drinking and the 197 00:09:24,240 --> 00:09:27,240 Speaker 1: height of my success are parallel. So then sometimes I 198 00:09:27,280 --> 00:09:29,560 Speaker 1: think to myself, maybe I should just do that again. 199 00:09:30,000 --> 00:09:33,960 Speaker 3: Shit, because then you know, look, she knows why I 200 00:09:34,000 --> 00:09:38,480 Speaker 3: said that, because it damn Cheryl, good lord, you're talking 201 00:09:38,520 --> 00:09:41,800 Speaker 3: to me now, because the the the lowest I've ever 202 00:09:41,800 --> 00:09:43,360 Speaker 3: been in my life is when I was the highest 203 00:09:43,360 --> 00:09:47,839 Speaker 3: in my career. God, absolutely, I feel you're a hundred person. 204 00:09:47,840 --> 00:09:48,720 Speaker 1: Is that crazy? 205 00:09:49,040 --> 00:09:52,000 Speaker 3: Is the case? She was sitting there and watching it 206 00:09:52,120 --> 00:09:54,320 Speaker 3: all unfold the lowest I've ever. 207 00:09:54,200 --> 00:09:56,839 Speaker 2: Been because he's a perfectionist and an overthinker. And when 208 00:09:56,880 --> 00:09:59,360 Speaker 2: you start to get success, you don't want to lose it. 209 00:09:59,360 --> 00:10:01,280 Speaker 2: You want to keep it going. And you wanted totter 210 00:10:01,400 --> 00:10:03,480 Speaker 2: and be better. And when you're trying to do that, 211 00:10:03,600 --> 00:10:06,600 Speaker 2: you can't quiet your thoughts. And yeah, I watched it 212 00:10:07,679 --> 00:10:11,079 Speaker 2: when you said that, I oh, wow, you were speaking 213 00:10:11,080 --> 00:10:11,600 Speaker 2: his language. 214 00:10:11,600 --> 00:10:13,200 Speaker 1: I think that's why. I mean, like, look, it's not 215 00:10:13,320 --> 00:10:17,360 Speaker 1: one reason, but like I I mean, like for example, 216 00:10:17,400 --> 00:10:19,680 Speaker 1: like I don't sleep a lot, and I was never 217 00:10:19,880 --> 00:10:30,000 Speaker 1: like that, but everyone's like, oh my dad. I mean 218 00:10:30,440 --> 00:10:35,280 Speaker 1: I do I know that perfect? I've got brother everywhere. Anyway, 219 00:10:35,559 --> 00:10:43,880 Speaker 1: that's another pot more interesting. Yeah, it's confusing, but yeah, 220 00:10:43,960 --> 00:10:47,760 Speaker 1: like I just I mean, you should see my home. 221 00:10:48,160 --> 00:10:50,679 Speaker 1: Like it's like I always joke like the O C D. 222 00:10:50,920 --> 00:10:56,400 Speaker 1: And but it's not a joke like the freaking but 223 00:10:56,520 --> 00:10:58,560 Speaker 1: like and then I asked, I literally do I try so? 224 00:10:58,600 --> 00:11:01,640 Speaker 1: I meditate? I do translit on a meditation. Has it helped? Yes? 225 00:11:02,240 --> 00:11:04,360 Speaker 1: But man, when I've like and I've gone, and I'm 226 00:11:04,360 --> 00:11:05,680 Speaker 1: not going to say I do it every day, like 227 00:11:05,720 --> 00:11:08,400 Speaker 1: I'm not, No, I don't should I Yes? But then 228 00:11:08,480 --> 00:11:10,920 Speaker 1: like the self hate, how dare you don't do this? 229 00:11:11,000 --> 00:11:13,200 Speaker 1: And then like I start to like hate myself and 230 00:11:13,240 --> 00:11:17,240 Speaker 1: I am very present. I'm like starting to really try 231 00:11:17,280 --> 00:11:19,960 Speaker 1: and stay more observed, like what the like what that 232 00:11:20,040 --> 00:11:23,560 Speaker 1: voice is instead of like define myself because of it, 233 00:11:24,200 --> 00:11:26,240 Speaker 1: Like because it's just like it's thoughts, like and feelings. 234 00:11:26,360 --> 00:11:28,600 Speaker 1: It's just like the waves of the ocean. It just goes. 235 00:11:28,760 --> 00:11:30,320 Speaker 1: It's in and out, in and out, and it's not 236 00:11:30,480 --> 00:11:33,280 Speaker 1: it's not the reality good, but like I need to 237 00:11:33,320 --> 00:11:34,920 Speaker 1: live it now instead of just preach it. 238 00:11:34,960 --> 00:11:36,880 Speaker 2: Well, it's the it's the more you preach it, it's 239 00:11:36,960 --> 00:11:38,439 Speaker 2: the roommate you never wanted. 240 00:11:38,160 --> 00:11:39,160 Speaker 1: And it never goes away. 241 00:11:39,240 --> 00:11:42,080 Speaker 2: I hate I remember it was like if you don't 242 00:11:42,120 --> 00:11:44,960 Speaker 2: think that, you don't self hate, and that voice in 243 00:11:44,960 --> 00:11:46,600 Speaker 2: your head doesn't sabotage you every moment. 244 00:11:46,960 --> 00:11:49,200 Speaker 1: Just the next time when you're in the shower, just 245 00:11:49,280 --> 00:11:52,000 Speaker 1: observe your thoughts. Just observe your thoughts. And you're like, 246 00:11:52,040 --> 00:11:54,000 Speaker 1: oh my god, I'm doing it. I'm doing it. I 247 00:11:54,120 --> 00:11:57,400 Speaker 1: know it's crazy. It's Michael Singer. Yep, oh yes, I 248 00:11:57,400 --> 00:11:59,199 Speaker 1: love him. That's all my bucket list. I want to 249 00:11:59,200 --> 00:12:02,360 Speaker 1: go to his place and flo me and my stepdad. 250 00:12:02,400 --> 00:12:02,840 Speaker 1: We want to go. 251 00:12:02,880 --> 00:12:05,320 Speaker 2: So I will say this to you Cheryl and to 252 00:12:05,400 --> 00:12:07,920 Speaker 2: you TJ. Is that that perfectionism and that OCD. I 253 00:12:07,920 --> 00:12:09,480 Speaker 2: mean I have a smidge of it. I don't have 254 00:12:09,520 --> 00:12:11,520 Speaker 2: it to the extent that either one of you do. 255 00:12:11,600 --> 00:12:14,160 Speaker 2: But the point is it's part of why you are 256 00:12:14,240 --> 00:12:15,480 Speaker 2: as great as you are at. 257 00:12:15,400 --> 00:12:18,679 Speaker 1: What you do, both of you, because you know it's true. 258 00:12:18,720 --> 00:12:20,320 Speaker 1: So it's like it's like it's a it's a double 259 00:12:20,400 --> 00:12:23,200 Speaker 1: edged sword. Yeah, but there's also but like I for me, 260 00:12:23,320 --> 00:12:25,280 Speaker 1: at least, I know I'm living up to something that 261 00:12:25,400 --> 00:12:28,839 Speaker 1: like I'll never be happy, Like it's not it's not enough, right, 262 00:12:28,920 --> 00:12:31,240 Speaker 1: Like it's not even if I'm like, oh, if I 263 00:12:31,320 --> 00:12:33,240 Speaker 1: get this or maybe if i'm this, or if I 264 00:12:33,280 --> 00:12:36,160 Speaker 1: get like all the money, is like no, like it's 265 00:12:36,200 --> 00:12:39,040 Speaker 1: not that is not it. It's not it. And I 266 00:12:39,080 --> 00:12:41,319 Speaker 1: know it sounds so cliche and for me it sounds 267 00:12:41,400 --> 00:12:43,960 Speaker 1: so like not my life at this moment, but I'm 268 00:12:43,960 --> 00:12:46,080 Speaker 1: trying to get there. It's like it all comes in, 269 00:12:46,240 --> 00:12:49,000 Speaker 1: it's all within, and that's the thing why I have 270 00:12:49,080 --> 00:12:51,400 Speaker 1: to be alone right now. And that's why because like 271 00:12:51,880 --> 00:12:53,760 Speaker 1: if I don't like what I see, I'm just gonna 272 00:12:54,000 --> 00:12:55,720 Speaker 1: literally life is gonna go by, and I would have 273 00:12:55,760 --> 00:12:58,120 Speaker 1: done the same. It's the freaking hamstery. I'm trying to 274 00:12:58,120 --> 00:12:58,800 Speaker 1: get off of it. 275 00:13:00,840 --> 00:13:02,520 Speaker 3: You say you have to be alone right now, but you. 276 00:13:02,480 --> 00:13:04,400 Speaker 1: Have to I mean, I'm not alone. I'm not lonely though. 277 00:13:05,600 --> 00:13:08,440 Speaker 3: That was my question there. I guess where is your. 278 00:13:08,600 --> 00:13:09,240 Speaker 1: Me and my friends? 279 00:13:09,280 --> 00:13:10,360 Speaker 3: You are killing it France. 280 00:13:10,440 --> 00:13:15,120 Speaker 1: Yes, Frenchie, she got the dog and the divorce. Not 281 00:13:15,160 --> 00:13:20,120 Speaker 1: like a friend, Chie, like a toy boy. Yeah, no, 282 00:13:20,400 --> 00:13:21,280 Speaker 1: forget to love that girl. 283 00:13:21,760 --> 00:13:24,720 Speaker 3: You talk about the family you lost was Dancy with 284 00:13:24,760 --> 00:13:26,800 Speaker 3: the stars, but I know you had friends outside of that. 285 00:13:26,880 --> 00:13:29,360 Speaker 3: But what is your support group look like these days? 286 00:13:29,559 --> 00:13:33,800 Speaker 1: It's small and I know this is good. But I 287 00:13:33,840 --> 00:13:37,320 Speaker 1: have a lot of paid friends and I love them, Yeah, 288 00:13:38,080 --> 00:13:41,719 Speaker 1: regardless of the intention, I just know that first of all, 289 00:13:41,760 --> 00:13:44,760 Speaker 1: I trust them all, even though I can count on 290 00:13:44,760 --> 00:13:49,560 Speaker 1: one hand. But I also have realized, like I can't 291 00:13:49,559 --> 00:13:51,880 Speaker 1: give more than that, Like I can only do so 292 00:13:52,000 --> 00:13:54,600 Speaker 1: much before I then start to be a people pleaser 293 00:13:54,640 --> 00:13:57,960 Speaker 1: because like I'm also a victim of that. But like 294 00:13:58,160 --> 00:14:03,360 Speaker 1: I also know that me leaving La was a really 295 00:14:03,600 --> 00:14:05,400 Speaker 1: and me going through all of this. You know, your 296 00:14:05,559 --> 00:14:08,880 Speaker 1: freaking friends are man at the height of your success 297 00:14:09,160 --> 00:14:11,520 Speaker 1: and when you decide to do something that may not 298 00:14:11,600 --> 00:14:16,000 Speaker 1: be of society like the norm, right, like or god forbid, 299 00:14:16,000 --> 00:14:17,640 Speaker 1: I have an opinion, like do you know me? Do 300 00:14:17,679 --> 00:14:19,600 Speaker 1: you not know me? Like like this is not the 301 00:14:19,680 --> 00:14:22,920 Speaker 1: you know, I feel like I've always been one to 302 00:14:23,000 --> 00:14:30,760 Speaker 1: have an opinion regardless. It's just so life is just 303 00:14:30,800 --> 00:14:34,400 Speaker 1: so short and for me, it's like maybe I have 304 00:14:34,440 --> 00:14:37,160 Speaker 1: trust issues or I do have trust issues. I know that, 305 00:14:38,040 --> 00:14:39,920 Speaker 1: but I don't want to live life jaded. 306 00:14:49,040 --> 00:14:51,920 Speaker 3: Are you surprised by the number of people you've lost 307 00:14:52,240 --> 00:14:54,320 Speaker 3: as far as friends in the past two years? That 308 00:14:54,440 --> 00:14:56,320 Speaker 3: friends circle? You said, you know who your friends are? 309 00:14:56,320 --> 00:14:58,960 Speaker 1: Well, what's interesting is that, Like I think what people 310 00:14:59,040 --> 00:15:01,080 Speaker 1: may think is that, like all of us pro dancers 311 00:15:01,080 --> 00:15:03,840 Speaker 1: are friends. Like but just because we're on a show together, 312 00:15:04,000 --> 00:15:08,280 Speaker 1: that doesn't mean that we're like besties. We know, you know, 313 00:15:09,360 --> 00:15:14,240 Speaker 1: I know. But the rest of the people listening to this, 314 00:15:14,560 --> 00:15:19,880 Speaker 1: lots of people but like you know, uh yeah, I 315 00:15:19,880 --> 00:15:20,920 Speaker 1: think I'll just leave it at that. 316 00:15:21,080 --> 00:15:25,920 Speaker 3: Like you even outside of that, but I'm have but. 317 00:15:25,880 --> 00:15:27,520 Speaker 1: I guess I didn't have a lot of friends really 318 00:15:27,760 --> 00:15:29,960 Speaker 1: like not not like well, I've been burned a lot, 319 00:15:30,960 --> 00:15:35,440 Speaker 1: But who hasn't I don't. I would say I'm socially awkward, 320 00:15:35,440 --> 00:15:38,960 Speaker 1: like I don't necessarily love going out in public and 321 00:15:39,000 --> 00:15:41,360 Speaker 1: meeting people like I mean, that's a whole nother conversation, 322 00:15:41,480 --> 00:15:43,200 Speaker 1: but like that has to do with I mean, I 323 00:15:43,360 --> 00:15:45,720 Speaker 1: just honestly, like, say some more things about yourself that 324 00:15:45,760 --> 00:15:48,040 Speaker 1: are exactly like don't leave for work, like I only 325 00:15:48,040 --> 00:15:50,800 Speaker 1: get in my car, like this past weekend, I literally 326 00:15:50,840 --> 00:15:54,640 Speaker 1: did arts and crafts while researching Gille Marini, my next 327 00:15:54,680 --> 00:15:57,600 Speaker 1: guest on the podcast, and walking and feeding my dog 328 00:15:57,720 --> 00:16:02,920 Speaker 1: and like tending to hurt act like I don't go anywhere. 329 00:16:05,080 --> 00:16:06,920 Speaker 1: It's nice though, right, you're in a good place. You're 330 00:16:06,920 --> 00:16:09,480 Speaker 1: in a good place to do that death definitely, But 331 00:16:09,520 --> 00:16:11,760 Speaker 1: I'm also like I'm never ever gonna meet anyone behind 332 00:16:11,800 --> 00:16:15,880 Speaker 1: my closet door number one, like come on down, unfortunately, 333 00:16:16,000 --> 00:16:21,520 Speaker 1: like unfortunately, But dating sounds like I would rather do 334 00:16:21,960 --> 00:16:25,560 Speaker 1: anything I think than date, because TJ says this to me, 335 00:16:25,560 --> 00:16:27,280 Speaker 1: It's like, can't you give me on a date? Are 336 00:16:27,280 --> 00:16:29,440 Speaker 1: you missing out on getting that opportunity to date? 337 00:16:29,520 --> 00:16:33,600 Speaker 2: I was like, getting the opportunity to date, ew, that 338 00:16:33,720 --> 00:16:36,000 Speaker 2: is the last thing I want to do. 339 00:16:36,480 --> 00:16:39,560 Speaker 1: Awkward first dates. Really, I refuse to do dating. I 340 00:16:39,600 --> 00:16:41,240 Speaker 1: don't even know what a dating. I don't even know 341 00:16:41,240 --> 00:16:42,960 Speaker 1: how to work a dating. I've never done one either. 342 00:16:43,000 --> 00:16:44,880 Speaker 1: And then like what like you know, like, oh, you're 343 00:16:45,000 --> 00:16:46,800 Speaker 1: just swipe? What a douche? Like I can't do this? 344 00:16:47,200 --> 00:16:50,240 Speaker 3: Do she think these are the conversations we have? Yes, 345 00:16:50,360 --> 00:16:52,320 Speaker 3: her boyfriend says to her, don't want to date? 346 00:16:52,880 --> 00:16:57,360 Speaker 1: I'm like also like maybe why are you asking my 347 00:16:57,440 --> 00:17:00,320 Speaker 1: wet tissue? At you free? 348 00:17:00,440 --> 00:17:02,359 Speaker 3: You're you have, you have an opportunity? 349 00:17:02,400 --> 00:17:05,840 Speaker 1: Now, why are you don't do that? 350 00:17:06,000 --> 00:17:06,119 Speaker 2: Right? 351 00:17:06,200 --> 00:17:08,280 Speaker 3: Don't stop it? 352 00:17:07,280 --> 00:17:11,800 Speaker 1: Just st up your marriage counselor life coach. I'm not certified. 353 00:17:13,880 --> 00:17:14,679 Speaker 3: Who's counseling you? 354 00:17:15,040 --> 00:17:17,399 Speaker 1: A lot of counseling, That's what I mean. Paid friends? 355 00:17:17,480 --> 00:17:21,680 Speaker 1: I mean I've got a circle and boy is that expensive? No, 356 00:17:21,760 --> 00:17:24,159 Speaker 1: it's not a write off. I tried that podcast. You 357 00:17:24,200 --> 00:17:25,760 Speaker 1: know that's paying the bills, right, you. 358 00:17:25,720 --> 00:17:28,040 Speaker 3: Don't have to name them. But is there somebody you're 359 00:17:28,080 --> 00:17:32,840 Speaker 3: still surprised that is out of your life now after 360 00:17:32,920 --> 00:17:35,639 Speaker 3: all you've gone through, Like you're still just surprised, like wow, 361 00:17:36,000 --> 00:17:39,400 Speaker 3: how close we were that you've just lost? 362 00:17:39,440 --> 00:17:43,600 Speaker 1: It's not and it's and it's yes, yes, yes, And 363 00:17:43,640 --> 00:17:46,080 Speaker 1: it's sometimes it's too almost too much to face at 364 00:17:46,080 --> 00:17:49,600 Speaker 1: the moment at this moment, like I have to face 365 00:17:49,640 --> 00:17:52,440 Speaker 1: it at some point. But I've got lots to face 366 00:17:52,480 --> 00:17:54,399 Speaker 1: because I, like I said, you know, there was a 367 00:17:54,440 --> 00:17:57,320 Speaker 1: lot of and even before Dancing on the Stars, there's 368 00:17:57,359 --> 00:17:58,600 Speaker 1: a lot of stuff I haven't faced. 369 00:17:59,240 --> 00:18:01,840 Speaker 3: Yeah, what's left? 370 00:18:00,560 --> 00:18:03,280 Speaker 1: Face? How long do you got? 371 00:18:03,480 --> 00:18:05,000 Speaker 3: Hey? We got all kinds of time. We're good, right, 372 00:18:05,600 --> 00:18:06,480 Speaker 3: audio guys, as. 373 00:18:06,320 --> 00:18:08,600 Speaker 1: We're I think I'm going through like the forgiving of 374 00:18:09,160 --> 00:18:10,800 Speaker 1: like I got molested when I was a little girl. 375 00:18:11,480 --> 00:18:14,920 Speaker 3: So you've talked about that, yes, yeah. 376 00:18:14,920 --> 00:18:16,960 Speaker 1: Yeah, I have talked about it quite a lot, and 377 00:18:17,040 --> 00:18:21,399 Speaker 1: I think it's really living the Can I say that 378 00:18:21,440 --> 00:18:25,000 Speaker 1: I have a that I've forgiven? Yes? But am I do? 379 00:18:25,080 --> 00:18:29,639 Speaker 1: I really like I'm really dissecting it all as we 380 00:18:29,760 --> 00:18:32,600 Speaker 1: do over thinkers, but like I really want to make 381 00:18:32,640 --> 00:18:35,480 Speaker 1: sure that I'm healing, because like, without me healing my past, 382 00:18:35,520 --> 00:18:39,320 Speaker 1: how the hell am I gonna heal what's happening now 383 00:18:39,600 --> 00:18:42,200 Speaker 1: or what has happened in the past couple of years. It's 384 00:18:42,240 --> 00:18:44,040 Speaker 1: just so much. And I believe that we hold on 385 00:18:44,080 --> 00:18:47,119 Speaker 1: to trauma like our body does. Keep the score. M 386 00:18:48,480 --> 00:18:51,120 Speaker 1: oh yeah, And I've seen too many people and within 387 00:18:51,200 --> 00:18:54,359 Speaker 1: my family just go too soon, Like it's just too soon. Yeah, 388 00:18:54,359 --> 00:18:55,160 Speaker 1: because it's true. 389 00:18:55,200 --> 00:18:56,919 Speaker 2: I do believe that's who You hold it in and 390 00:18:56,960 --> 00:18:59,040 Speaker 2: your body reacts and it's not good. 391 00:18:59,080 --> 00:19:03,280 Speaker 1: Have you ever done a puncture? I'm not religiously, I've 392 00:19:03,320 --> 00:19:06,399 Speaker 1: done it, and you can't believe. Like I started sobbing 393 00:19:06,400 --> 00:19:08,639 Speaker 1: and like what's happening. But it's like all that pain, 394 00:19:09,119 --> 00:19:11,960 Speaker 1: all that emotion you've been holding in just gets released. 395 00:19:12,160 --> 00:19:14,600 Speaker 1: It's bizarre. So I do energy work like I have 396 00:19:14,720 --> 00:19:17,719 Speaker 1: this right, I have this energy healer that I know 397 00:19:18,400 --> 00:19:21,200 Speaker 1: about acupuncture. However, I hear it's amazing, Like I hear 398 00:19:21,240 --> 00:19:22,320 Speaker 1: it's such a release. 399 00:19:22,560 --> 00:19:25,160 Speaker 2: It's crazy. And if you don't believe that your body 400 00:19:25,200 --> 00:19:28,160 Speaker 2: doesn't hold onto emotion, do it one time and you will. 401 00:19:28,280 --> 00:19:31,160 Speaker 2: Your mind will be blown. It's crazy. Yeah, I mean 402 00:19:31,320 --> 00:19:32,560 Speaker 2: it was really. 403 00:19:32,480 --> 00:19:36,520 Speaker 1: No, it shocked me. Yeah no, I believe, like, oh my, 404 00:19:36,760 --> 00:19:37,840 Speaker 1: you know it's so tight. 405 00:19:38,600 --> 00:19:43,080 Speaker 4: That's trauma, you know, not just pointing at you, sorry, 406 00:19:45,359 --> 00:19:47,239 Speaker 4: but you know, like when animals shake, like when your 407 00:19:47,320 --> 00:19:48,840 Speaker 4: dog shakes, they're releasing trump. 408 00:19:48,880 --> 00:19:52,680 Speaker 1: They don't hold on to PTSD. This is a freaking fact, 409 00:19:54,680 --> 00:19:55,080 Speaker 1: why is it? 410 00:19:55,600 --> 00:20:02,359 Speaker 3: Or again the paid friends you have, yes, the counsel 411 00:20:02,400 --> 00:20:05,000 Speaker 3: you I'm fascinating you talked about the trauma you went 412 00:20:05,040 --> 00:20:09,359 Speaker 3: through and being abused when you were younger as a child. 413 00:20:10,480 --> 00:20:14,720 Speaker 3: That's something you need to forgive myself. You need to 414 00:20:14,760 --> 00:20:16,920 Speaker 3: forgive yourself. You don't need to forgive. 415 00:20:17,320 --> 00:20:19,159 Speaker 1: I'm not ever okay, no, no, yeah, I need to 416 00:20:19,160 --> 00:20:22,760 Speaker 1: make that clear. I won't thank you for bringing that up. No, no, 417 00:20:22,800 --> 00:20:26,600 Speaker 1: I don't. I don't forgive him for the act. Uh okay, No, 418 00:20:26,840 --> 00:20:29,120 Speaker 1: definitely what he did was absolutely, I mean he's he's 419 00:20:29,160 --> 00:20:33,720 Speaker 1: dead now. But it's more like, forgive me for whatever 420 00:20:33,800 --> 00:20:36,679 Speaker 1: I was feeling and dealing with at that moment, for 421 00:20:36,760 --> 00:20:39,920 Speaker 1: not telling my parents right away, Like it took years 422 00:20:41,119 --> 00:20:43,040 Speaker 1: and it wasn't even me that told them, you know, 423 00:20:43,160 --> 00:20:47,359 Speaker 1: so that I testified him against him when I was 424 00:20:47,400 --> 00:20:50,280 Speaker 1: like nine. I mean, mind you, I don't know because 425 00:20:50,280 --> 00:20:52,480 Speaker 1: of my timeline. That's what happens with trauma. You just 426 00:20:52,520 --> 00:20:55,119 Speaker 1: don't really have a timeline. But then after that, I 427 00:20:55,160 --> 00:20:57,600 Speaker 1: had just gottento abusive relationships like that was my home 428 00:20:57,760 --> 00:21:02,000 Speaker 1: was being treated in a way like that, you know, Yeah, 429 00:21:02,160 --> 00:21:04,199 Speaker 1: you were imprinted early on in that my mom and 430 00:21:04,280 --> 00:21:07,360 Speaker 1: dad divorced. Yeah, like it just was like, look, were 431 00:21:07,359 --> 00:21:12,520 Speaker 1: there great times? Absolutely, like obviously, but there was a 432 00:21:12,560 --> 00:21:14,120 Speaker 1: lot of troubma. I'm not going to deny that. 433 00:21:14,359 --> 00:21:17,320 Speaker 2: Well, I think it's remarkable that you're taking the time 434 00:21:17,880 --> 00:21:18,760 Speaker 2: to work on yourself. 435 00:21:18,760 --> 00:21:21,080 Speaker 1: Most people don't ever get to that place. 436 00:21:21,520 --> 00:21:26,240 Speaker 2: And for anyone who is stuck or doesn't know how 437 00:21:26,280 --> 00:21:28,359 Speaker 2: to get out of a situation, whether it's a career 438 00:21:28,480 --> 00:21:31,040 Speaker 2: or a relationship, or can't get out of their own way, 439 00:21:31,119 --> 00:21:33,440 Speaker 2: what would you what would you say to anyone listening 440 00:21:33,480 --> 00:21:36,639 Speaker 2: to who's hearing your story and thinking, how do I 441 00:21:36,640 --> 00:21:37,679 Speaker 2: take that first step? 442 00:21:38,359 --> 00:21:41,119 Speaker 1: Well, first, know that you're not alone. I think that 443 00:21:41,200 --> 00:21:43,200 Speaker 1: is I wish I had someone. I wish I could 444 00:21:43,240 --> 00:21:46,159 Speaker 1: hear at least someone's story when I was growing up. Actually, 445 00:21:46,160 --> 00:21:49,439 Speaker 1: because it is lonely when you when you feel like 446 00:21:49,480 --> 00:21:52,160 Speaker 1: you can't talk to anybody. Because I didn't talk to anyone, 447 00:21:53,200 --> 00:21:56,320 Speaker 1: it became my normal way of living. Like the abuse 448 00:21:56,400 --> 00:22:00,239 Speaker 1: both physically and mentally was my that was normal. I 449 00:22:00,280 --> 00:22:02,720 Speaker 1: was not even attracted to like the nice guy, and 450 00:22:02,960 --> 00:22:05,040 Speaker 1: it was actually quite disgusting to me when men were 451 00:22:05,160 --> 00:22:09,040 Speaker 1: nice to me. It was so crazy anyway, So but 452 00:22:09,119 --> 00:22:14,000 Speaker 1: then also know that it's just about what is happening 453 00:22:14,040 --> 00:22:16,359 Speaker 1: in front of you. Like I think it's so overwhelming 454 00:22:16,440 --> 00:22:19,080 Speaker 1: to think, like, oh my god, now she's turned her life. 455 00:22:19,240 --> 00:22:21,199 Speaker 1: I can only imagine like people are like, I'm never 456 00:22:21,280 --> 00:22:22,760 Speaker 1: going to get there. I'm never going to get to 457 00:22:22,880 --> 00:22:26,280 Speaker 1: like success. This has been killing me. It is really 458 00:22:26,320 --> 00:22:31,280 Speaker 1: about putting yourself first and trying to just not think 459 00:22:31,320 --> 00:22:33,960 Speaker 1: too far into the future because we actually don't know 460 00:22:34,000 --> 00:22:36,760 Speaker 1: what's going to happen in about two minutes from now, 461 00:22:37,080 --> 00:22:39,159 Speaker 1: Like we don't know any of it. Like all we 462 00:22:39,240 --> 00:22:41,840 Speaker 1: know is right now, and what is the priority? It 463 00:22:41,880 --> 00:22:44,240 Speaker 1: has to be you, because how can you tend to 464 00:22:44,280 --> 00:22:46,760 Speaker 1: other people without putting yourself first? In general? 465 00:22:46,880 --> 00:22:52,080 Speaker 3: You know, where did marriage fit in that journey for you? 466 00:22:52,480 --> 00:22:54,919 Speaker 3: I hear that you were on your journey. Were you 467 00:22:55,000 --> 00:22:57,639 Speaker 3: not ready? Were you not a good mate or partner? 468 00:22:57,880 --> 00:23:01,399 Speaker 3: Did the marriage set you back even in your journey? 469 00:23:01,440 --> 00:23:03,359 Speaker 3: How did it help you or hinder you in the 470 00:23:03,440 --> 00:23:04,280 Speaker 3: journey that you're now on. 471 00:23:04,920 --> 00:23:08,200 Speaker 1: Well, I learned a lot, that's for sure. I learned 472 00:23:08,240 --> 00:23:14,840 Speaker 1: that you can't buy love. You tried, I did, I think, so, yeah, 473 00:23:14,880 --> 00:23:18,320 Speaker 1: what do you mean I tried to not obviously? I 474 00:23:18,359 --> 00:23:22,520 Speaker 1: didn't buy my ex husband, but like I definitely I 475 00:23:22,560 --> 00:23:25,240 Speaker 1: would say I was the breadwind like I supported us. 476 00:23:25,720 --> 00:23:28,320 Speaker 1: And I don't think it's black and white like for 477 00:23:28,359 --> 00:23:31,000 Speaker 1: me to say like I thought I could. I think 478 00:23:31,119 --> 00:23:33,960 Speaker 1: this is me my subconscious like after doing all this work, 479 00:23:34,000 --> 00:23:35,640 Speaker 1: like I wasn't going into it like oh I'm gonna 480 00:23:35,640 --> 00:23:37,879 Speaker 1: buy his love and no, like that's not like what 481 00:23:38,040 --> 00:23:41,760 Speaker 1: my mind frame was. But like I just thought like 482 00:23:41,840 --> 00:23:46,240 Speaker 1: the control, like me controlled, being the person who controlled. 483 00:23:46,280 --> 00:23:48,439 Speaker 1: I feel like you understand me. It's hard for you 484 00:23:48,440 --> 00:23:52,040 Speaker 1: to put this into words, right, but like it it's 485 00:23:52,160 --> 00:23:54,480 Speaker 1: like it was like it made me feel good, but 486 00:23:54,480 --> 00:23:57,280 Speaker 1: then it didn't necessarily make the relationship good, right, so 487 00:23:57,480 --> 00:23:58,880 Speaker 1: I had a false sense of security. 488 00:23:58,920 --> 00:24:00,800 Speaker 2: Yeah, but it's also a mask lading and so it 489 00:24:00,840 --> 00:24:02,120 Speaker 2: creates an awful dynamic. 490 00:24:02,400 --> 00:24:04,320 Speaker 1: And as much as I say, do I want someone 491 00:24:04,359 --> 00:24:07,719 Speaker 1: who takes care of me or I just don't know 492 00:24:07,760 --> 00:24:10,480 Speaker 1: if I do, like I and that that is another 493 00:24:10,640 --> 00:24:13,480 Speaker 1: that's just adding to the pile. But like I need to, 494 00:24:14,040 --> 00:24:16,800 Speaker 1: you know, let it go, Like I gotta let it go, right, 495 00:24:16,840 --> 00:24:20,400 Speaker 1: Like I have to just be able to be all 496 00:24:20,640 --> 00:24:22,560 Speaker 1: the things, Like it's not just one or the other. 497 00:24:24,359 --> 00:24:24,800 Speaker 1: So deep. 498 00:24:24,920 --> 00:24:27,040 Speaker 2: This is of friendship though, Like I mean, I think 499 00:24:27,040 --> 00:24:29,600 Speaker 2: that's a good starting place, just friendship, right, yeah, well 500 00:24:29,760 --> 00:24:31,880 Speaker 2: I mean you go, I think so. 501 00:24:32,480 --> 00:24:36,680 Speaker 3: If anybody listening might be anyone, well a guy listening. Okay, 502 00:24:36,720 --> 00:24:38,160 Speaker 3: she's not ready to mingle. 503 00:24:37,920 --> 00:24:41,760 Speaker 1: Yet, and if you mingle, preferably let's just do it 504 00:24:41,840 --> 00:24:43,680 Speaker 1: like you know, comfort of my own home, but non't 505 00:24:43,680 --> 00:24:44,520 Speaker 1: bed a creepy Okay. 506 00:24:45,520 --> 00:24:47,800 Speaker 3: Do you have any idea what kind of guy you're 507 00:24:47,840 --> 00:24:49,080 Speaker 3: looking for? You want? 508 00:24:49,160 --> 00:24:50,919 Speaker 1: Okay, yes, I do, actually, cause I know what I 509 00:24:50,960 --> 00:24:51,400 Speaker 1: don't want. 510 00:24:51,480 --> 00:24:56,600 Speaker 3: So women, what you don't want? 511 00:24:57,520 --> 00:24:59,240 Speaker 1: You don't know what you want, but you definitely know 512 00:24:59,280 --> 00:25:01,760 Speaker 1: what you don't want. That's the thing when I was like, 513 00:25:01,840 --> 00:25:03,840 Speaker 1: what do you want? Like, well, what do you don't want? 514 00:25:03,920 --> 00:25:07,200 Speaker 1: Like that's that's the good starting point, right. I want 515 00:25:07,240 --> 00:25:10,840 Speaker 1: someone who wants to evolve like that, wants to consistently 516 00:25:10,920 --> 00:25:14,480 Speaker 1: and wants to like work on himself, be able to 517 00:25:14,480 --> 00:25:18,320 Speaker 1: take accountability when needed, because like, you can blame all 518 00:25:18,400 --> 00:25:20,760 Speaker 1: day long, but at the end of the day, you're 519 00:25:20,800 --> 00:25:22,680 Speaker 1: stuck with you for the rest of your freakod life. 520 00:25:22,760 --> 00:25:28,199 Speaker 1: You better like yourself. Someone who's supportive, someone who is 521 00:25:28,840 --> 00:25:33,840 Speaker 1: not Confidence is the wrong word worthy, he is self 522 00:25:33,920 --> 00:25:37,240 Speaker 1: worth because confidence is just I believe ego like comes 523 00:25:37,240 --> 00:25:40,919 Speaker 1: from like the foundation of maybe a little ego. We 524 00:25:41,000 --> 00:25:46,000 Speaker 1: all have one, right, but like to really be okay 525 00:25:46,200 --> 00:25:52,040 Speaker 1: with who he is. I think that foundation is so important. 526 00:25:52,080 --> 00:25:55,800 Speaker 1: Communication of course, and then smell good and look good 527 00:25:55,840 --> 00:25:58,480 Speaker 1: like that's all bs, but like, yeah that helps, that 528 00:25:58,480 --> 00:26:02,000 Speaker 1: will help. That might seal the deal for me. Okay, 529 00:26:02,200 --> 00:26:05,560 Speaker 1: so attractive and showers what you're Yeah, yeah, hygiene. I 530 00:26:05,560 --> 00:26:07,399 Speaker 1: actually I prefer to make it if you smell like 531 00:26:07,400 --> 00:26:12,960 Speaker 1: old spice, that's an added bodus. I'm old school. Yeah, 532 00:26:12,960 --> 00:26:15,159 Speaker 1: I definitely make my partners. Back in the day, I 533 00:26:15,160 --> 00:26:16,920 Speaker 1: was like, you're not wearing Colone, you better go back 534 00:26:16,960 --> 00:26:22,280 Speaker 1: in that car yours. Absolutely absolutely, you gotta wear deodorant 535 00:26:22,280 --> 00:26:23,240 Speaker 1: and everything not. 536 00:26:23,200 --> 00:26:24,800 Speaker 3: Just clean you need you need. 537 00:26:25,080 --> 00:26:27,680 Speaker 1: So we're sweating, like I'm sweating like a freaking Jetsnat 538 00:26:27,680 --> 00:26:30,000 Speaker 1: truck driver. Like I'm like I like a shower, like 539 00:26:30,040 --> 00:26:31,200 Speaker 1: I'm spinning and there's sweat. 540 00:26:31,359 --> 00:26:34,120 Speaker 3: But you need colgne. You don't smell good. He needs 541 00:26:34,119 --> 00:26:34,879 Speaker 3: correct and we're. 542 00:26:34,720 --> 00:26:38,080 Speaker 1: Not doing the natural deodorant like you're gonna get Perspian correct. 543 00:26:38,160 --> 00:26:41,560 Speaker 1: It needs like maybe women's Yeah, it needs to actually 544 00:26:41,600 --> 00:26:45,240 Speaker 1: work odor. He doesn't need to mask, it needs to 545 00:26:45,400 --> 00:26:47,240 Speaker 1: block block. 546 00:26:49,280 --> 00:26:49,560 Speaker 3: All right. 547 00:26:49,640 --> 00:26:51,400 Speaker 1: So wait, you said you know what you don't want. 548 00:26:51,440 --> 00:26:55,720 Speaker 1: What don't you want the opposite of what I said? 549 00:26:55,720 --> 00:27:00,000 Speaker 4: So someone who blames people, someone who is super indecided. 550 00:27:00,160 --> 00:27:03,560 Speaker 1: Okay, So just if you can't order dinner like I 551 00:27:03,640 --> 00:27:07,000 Speaker 1: just can't. And that was my first and last date 552 00:27:07,040 --> 00:27:10,760 Speaker 1: that I was on since my Like, you couldn't order dinner. 553 00:27:11,040 --> 00:27:14,480 Speaker 1: I was like, oh, come on please, I was like, 554 00:27:14,800 --> 00:27:17,119 Speaker 1: I was like please, and don't say same as hers like, 555 00:27:17,200 --> 00:27:18,000 Speaker 1: I don't want that. 556 00:27:18,320 --> 00:27:21,919 Speaker 3: No, I'm fascinated. How long ago was this date? I 557 00:27:21,920 --> 00:27:22,119 Speaker 3: don't know. 558 00:27:22,160 --> 00:27:25,080 Speaker 1: I don't want to do it right, Okay, that's all 559 00:27:25,119 --> 00:27:25,600 Speaker 1: I'm saying. 560 00:27:25,920 --> 00:27:29,919 Speaker 3: Okay, but couldn't order dinner like deferred and you know 561 00:27:30,040 --> 00:27:30,560 Speaker 3: you set. 562 00:27:30,400 --> 00:27:33,159 Speaker 1: Me up on the state atual friend of ours. Oh god, 563 00:27:33,520 --> 00:27:36,040 Speaker 1: I mentioned earlier today. 564 00:27:39,440 --> 00:27:40,280 Speaker 3: Was gonna go bad. 565 00:27:40,880 --> 00:27:44,720 Speaker 1: I don't know. I don't date, that's why. 566 00:27:45,080 --> 00:27:48,240 Speaker 3: Oh my goodness, order food. 567 00:27:48,680 --> 00:27:49,800 Speaker 1: I think he got nervous. 568 00:27:50,200 --> 00:27:51,400 Speaker 3: Well, you are intimidating. 569 00:27:51,760 --> 00:27:52,199 Speaker 1: No, I'm not. 570 00:27:59,200 --> 00:27:59,399 Speaker 4: I'm not. 571 00:27:59,840 --> 00:28:02,119 Speaker 1: I'm I have a resting bitch face. We all know this, 572 00:28:02,200 --> 00:28:07,320 Speaker 1: but I'm happy inside. It's all Disneyland on the side. Okay, 573 00:28:07,440 --> 00:28:09,399 Speaker 1: Disney and fairies and twinkles and lights. 574 00:28:09,520 --> 00:28:10,359 Speaker 3: Now what the other? 575 00:28:10,520 --> 00:28:10,680 Speaker 4: Now? 576 00:28:10,720 --> 00:28:13,600 Speaker 3: Why did you, Cheryl? Why it got a lot of attention? Why? 577 00:28:13,640 --> 00:28:16,480 Speaker 3: Why why did you make this wedding? But TikTok post? 578 00:28:16,600 --> 00:28:17,720 Speaker 1: Which one the right was? 579 00:28:17,760 --> 00:28:18,760 Speaker 3: TikTok? Wasn't it the one? 580 00:28:18,800 --> 00:28:20,920 Speaker 1: I love some TikTok? I love it so much? 581 00:28:21,200 --> 00:28:21,800 Speaker 3: Biagra? 582 00:28:22,359 --> 00:28:22,959 Speaker 1: Biagra? 583 00:28:23,320 --> 00:28:26,080 Speaker 3: That wasn't that? That's a long time ago. 584 00:28:26,640 --> 00:28:29,119 Speaker 1: I was so me twenty twenty three. Okay, so that 585 00:28:29,320 --> 00:28:32,080 Speaker 1: was you? No, Okay, this is one thing I need 586 00:28:32,080 --> 00:28:37,680 Speaker 1: to be clear. I've had more than one ex boyfriend. Yes, right, 587 00:28:37,920 --> 00:28:39,080 Speaker 1: but you did names. 588 00:28:39,120 --> 00:28:41,280 Speaker 3: Okay, but you had to have known where everybody's head 589 00:28:41,320 --> 00:28:44,520 Speaker 3: was going to go when you posted that. No, you didn't, Cheryl. 590 00:28:45,000 --> 00:28:45,960 Speaker 3: Wouldn't you think. 591 00:28:45,800 --> 00:28:48,240 Speaker 1: I'm not like this, this like born? I mean, I 592 00:28:48,240 --> 00:28:50,840 Speaker 1: don't want I love everyone right, Like I'm just saying 593 00:28:51,240 --> 00:28:54,680 Speaker 1: like I'm not known to be this, like oh, you know, 594 00:28:54,840 --> 00:28:59,040 Speaker 1: like I have had a past. You're not sanctimonious. No, 595 00:28:59,160 --> 00:29:00,720 Speaker 1: And by the way, I'm not just talking about one. 596 00:29:01,000 --> 00:29:02,720 Speaker 1: Maybe I'm not talking about anyone. Maybe I'm just like, 597 00:29:02,960 --> 00:29:05,400 Speaker 1: this is a great sound. We're gonna use this, just 598 00:29:05,440 --> 00:29:07,320 Speaker 1: see if we can cause some controversy so we can 599 00:29:07,320 --> 00:29:08,120 Speaker 1: get some followers. 600 00:29:08,160 --> 00:29:10,800 Speaker 3: You said, oh, do you tell me that's so I 601 00:29:10,840 --> 00:29:11,600 Speaker 3: fell for it? 602 00:29:11,720 --> 00:29:14,200 Speaker 1: I think, so, okay, because the joke's on you, buddy, 603 00:29:14,200 --> 00:29:14,440 Speaker 1: not me. 604 00:29:14,600 --> 00:29:16,320 Speaker 3: Okay, So you're telling me that was BS. 605 00:29:16,400 --> 00:29:19,160 Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean it's just fun. It's fun. There's not 606 00:29:19,240 --> 00:29:21,400 Speaker 1: truth to everything I say or post. 607 00:29:21,160 --> 00:29:23,120 Speaker 3: Talk about this. Was there any truth to that TikTok post? 608 00:29:23,120 --> 00:29:25,240 Speaker 1: Which one can? I can? I I need your question memory. 609 00:29:25,320 --> 00:29:27,680 Speaker 1: I'm literally sweating my hand it hot in here? 610 00:29:28,840 --> 00:29:31,920 Speaker 3: What was it? He promised he wouldn't talk to her again? 611 00:29:32,000 --> 00:29:35,080 Speaker 3: But I found text messages viagra and a necklace and 612 00:29:35,120 --> 00:29:35,480 Speaker 3: a shoe. 613 00:29:35,480 --> 00:29:36,840 Speaker 1: Doesn't that sound like a great movie? 614 00:29:37,040 --> 00:29:39,640 Speaker 3: It sounds like what you wrote, Sheryl. 615 00:29:39,320 --> 00:29:43,280 Speaker 1: Literally sweating it is warman here? No, No, if there's 616 00:29:43,520 --> 00:29:46,120 Speaker 1: that okay, that specific posts, I would say fifty percent 617 00:29:46,160 --> 00:29:46,600 Speaker 1: of it's. 618 00:29:46,440 --> 00:29:49,920 Speaker 3: True, which fifty Yeah, I don't know you. 619 00:29:50,040 --> 00:29:56,920 Speaker 1: I mean, I say it again, but what was that? 620 00:29:56,960 --> 00:29:58,600 Speaker 3: But you had to have known what people were going 621 00:29:58,680 --> 00:30:01,040 Speaker 3: to think when you posted that, and was that the idea? 622 00:30:01,080 --> 00:30:03,240 Speaker 1: But back then I only had like five followers, so 623 00:30:03,280 --> 00:30:06,080 Speaker 1: I was like, this is not going to circle around. 624 00:30:06,840 --> 00:30:07,640 Speaker 3: I'm getting nowhere. 625 00:30:07,880 --> 00:30:09,960 Speaker 1: I mean I don't think she wants you to get anywhere. 626 00:30:09,960 --> 00:30:13,320 Speaker 2: That's the whole point I do. 627 00:30:14,320 --> 00:30:21,240 Speaker 1: Did you get I got tons after that post? Success. Yeah, 628 00:30:21,920 --> 00:30:24,240 Speaker 1: I'm still not happy though, still like more followers. You know, 629 00:30:24,600 --> 00:30:26,200 Speaker 1: you know, less folks never happy. 630 00:30:26,440 --> 00:30:31,160 Speaker 3: Do you enjoy it? Do the social media? Because of tiktoku, 631 00:30:31,240 --> 00:30:31,520 Speaker 3: It's like I. 632 00:30:31,520 --> 00:30:34,080 Speaker 1: Don't have to overthink it. It's so Instagram is starting 633 00:30:34,120 --> 00:30:39,520 Speaker 1: to get really manicured, and it's just like I'm at 634 00:30:39,520 --> 00:30:41,880 Speaker 1: the crossroads. Like the first thing I think about is 635 00:30:41,920 --> 00:30:44,040 Speaker 1: not to take a selfie or post, like it's just 636 00:30:44,120 --> 00:30:47,080 Speaker 1: not my mentality. But I know a lot of people, 637 00:30:47,360 --> 00:30:49,640 Speaker 1: do you know, they're like, oh my god, I get this. 638 00:30:50,320 --> 00:30:52,760 Speaker 1: I'm like wait, second, First, my goal is to get 639 00:30:52,800 --> 00:30:54,440 Speaker 1: the hell out of the situation that I'm in, Like 640 00:30:54,600 --> 00:30:56,520 Speaker 1: run if I have to run, right, Like, it's not 641 00:30:56,560 --> 00:30:58,680 Speaker 1: to take a sell, not to take a picture or 642 00:30:58,760 --> 00:31:00,520 Speaker 1: video of this. But like I'm I'm just not wire 643 00:31:00,960 --> 00:31:04,560 Speaker 1: like that. But mind you, I appreciate it. I'm learning 644 00:31:04,600 --> 00:31:06,560 Speaker 1: to love it. But I really love TikTok because you 645 00:31:06,600 --> 00:31:09,480 Speaker 1: could just be just yourself. It's just so raw, like 646 00:31:09,560 --> 00:31:12,120 Speaker 1: it's really who I am, and it's okay you get 647 00:31:12,160 --> 00:31:12,440 Speaker 1: away with. 648 00:31:12,520 --> 00:31:14,360 Speaker 3: Murder, Is it really who you are just fifty percent of? 649 00:31:14,880 --> 00:31:16,400 Speaker 1: Like maybe if you really want to talk about it, 650 00:31:16,480 --> 00:31:18,320 Speaker 1: maybe like sixty three point five percent. 651 00:31:19,080 --> 00:31:20,000 Speaker 3: Please talk to her. 652 00:31:29,920 --> 00:31:33,200 Speaker 2: Well in the podcast, you're loving it, And do you 653 00:31:33,240 --> 00:31:37,760 Speaker 2: have any regrets given what the podcast has created in 654 00:31:37,840 --> 00:31:40,560 Speaker 2: terms of your relationship with Dancing with the Stories, any 655 00:31:40,600 --> 00:31:41,760 Speaker 2: regrets about the podcast? 656 00:31:42,960 --> 00:31:47,400 Speaker 1: I don't have regrets, no, but I wish things would 657 00:31:47,440 --> 00:31:49,120 Speaker 1: have played out different. But that has nothing to do 658 00:31:49,200 --> 00:31:52,800 Speaker 1: with me having a podcast about a show that I 659 00:31:52,840 --> 00:31:55,400 Speaker 1: love and that I've been a part of for two decades. 660 00:31:56,200 --> 00:31:57,840 Speaker 3: As we sit here, well, if you were a bed 661 00:31:57,840 --> 00:32:00,000 Speaker 3: and woman, what would you put the chances of you 662 00:32:00,640 --> 00:32:03,560 Speaker 3: ever being on Dancing with the Stars again in any capacity? 663 00:32:04,840 --> 00:32:06,800 Speaker 3: If you were Bed and Woman? As we sit here, 664 00:32:06,920 --> 00:32:07,280 Speaker 3: I mean. 665 00:32:07,200 --> 00:32:09,040 Speaker 1: I know how I'll play Blackjack. I'm just saying, but 666 00:32:09,240 --> 00:32:13,040 Speaker 1: like I don't, I don't know. I don't like, I 667 00:32:13,080 --> 00:32:16,040 Speaker 1: don't think about it. I just I don't know. 668 00:32:17,400 --> 00:32:19,520 Speaker 3: But you want to be on the show I sit here, 669 00:32:19,640 --> 00:32:21,240 Speaker 3: It was such a part you grew up there. 670 00:32:21,440 --> 00:32:26,040 Speaker 1: I know that means of course, and it's also like yes, 671 00:32:26,600 --> 00:32:29,760 Speaker 1: it's everything, but like I also don't want to get 672 00:32:29,800 --> 00:32:30,920 Speaker 1: my hopes up either. 673 00:32:31,280 --> 00:32:35,040 Speaker 3: You know, though, why not be optimistic? Why not shouldn't 674 00:32:35,040 --> 00:32:37,200 Speaker 3: we all? Don't we tell people that all the time, 675 00:32:37,320 --> 00:32:40,840 Speaker 3: Like parents killed more kids' dreams than anything else. 676 00:32:41,040 --> 00:32:43,880 Speaker 1: Why I wish I was, I'm not. I'm not. Definitely. 677 00:32:43,880 --> 00:32:46,640 Speaker 1: If you were to say, who's cherl Burke, she's not optimist, 678 00:32:47,760 --> 00:32:50,719 Speaker 1: I would say she's a realist. Yes too much? So yeah, ok, 679 00:32:51,280 --> 00:32:54,160 Speaker 1: thank you? Yeah, And I'm proud of it. It is 680 00:32:54,200 --> 00:32:56,160 Speaker 1: what it is. You know, I'd rather live like that 681 00:32:56,200 --> 00:33:01,560 Speaker 1: than live in uh, you know, the fairy tale Disney World. 682 00:33:02,200 --> 00:33:02,720 Speaker 1: You said it? 683 00:33:03,160 --> 00:33:07,520 Speaker 3: Oh, here comes the call. 684 00:33:08,440 --> 00:33:09,440 Speaker 1: I do not say that. 685 00:33:09,720 --> 00:33:12,360 Speaker 3: On Dancing with the Stars. Tell me the I have 686 00:33:12,400 --> 00:33:15,000 Speaker 3: a couple dancing with the star, like for clarity, Okay, 687 00:33:17,800 --> 00:33:21,960 Speaker 3: I wanted to ask about the voting. Okay, okay, do 688 00:33:22,360 --> 00:33:24,880 Speaker 3: you are you still? Do you completely understand because I've 689 00:33:24,920 --> 00:33:25,440 Speaker 3: heard I. 690 00:33:25,440 --> 00:33:27,720 Speaker 1: Know, I don't. I don't. I don't think anyone other 691 00:33:27,760 --> 00:33:31,720 Speaker 1: than the people create whoever created this freaking whole formula 692 00:33:31,840 --> 00:33:34,320 Speaker 1: though brilliant, brilliant. 693 00:33:34,040 --> 00:33:35,560 Speaker 3: Like because none of us can understand it. 694 00:33:35,560 --> 00:33:35,720 Speaker 4: Well. 695 00:33:35,760 --> 00:33:37,760 Speaker 1: Also, it's not just that it's like the seven days 696 00:33:37,760 --> 00:33:40,720 Speaker 1: a week because like you at your own risk, right, 697 00:33:41,120 --> 00:33:43,120 Speaker 1: like you have to do seven days a week, like 698 00:33:43,160 --> 00:33:44,760 Speaker 1: you have to make this show, you have to go 699 00:33:44,800 --> 00:33:47,120 Speaker 1: out there, you have to be vulnerable, and it's like 700 00:33:47,200 --> 00:33:49,440 Speaker 1: it is seven days a week. Even if maybe they 701 00:33:49,440 --> 00:33:50,840 Speaker 1: say you could have days off, No one's having a 702 00:33:50,920 --> 00:33:53,520 Speaker 1: day off like it. And actually it's just a brilliant 703 00:33:53,560 --> 00:33:55,760 Speaker 1: formula in general to get emotions out of people, to 704 00:33:55,760 --> 00:33:59,160 Speaker 1: see people be vulnerable, like it's a great way of 705 00:33:59,440 --> 00:34:04,400 Speaker 1: just getting you get broken down. And then yes, I 706 00:34:04,400 --> 00:34:06,120 Speaker 1: guess the country watches water. 707 00:34:08,719 --> 00:34:12,960 Speaker 3: The voting because I've heard actual contestants complain celebrity contest 708 00:34:13,120 --> 00:34:15,960 Speaker 3: change about how the voter There's no way I got 709 00:34:16,080 --> 00:34:18,439 Speaker 3: voter off. This is like flat out will go off 710 00:34:18,440 --> 00:34:21,200 Speaker 3: in private about it. Did you all have a good 711 00:34:21,239 --> 00:34:23,480 Speaker 3: handle on how the voting worked? 712 00:34:23,880 --> 00:34:26,440 Speaker 1: I think, you know, I think people get so emotional 713 00:34:26,520 --> 00:34:30,360 Speaker 1: because it's like we are invested right like it actually, 714 00:34:30,840 --> 00:34:33,840 Speaker 1: especially as pros, like you know, after season after season, 715 00:34:35,800 --> 00:34:38,319 Speaker 1: but like can we read a rule book? Yes, but 716 00:34:38,360 --> 00:34:40,520 Speaker 1: do we obviously we don't, Like I don't know, it's 717 00:34:40,600 --> 00:34:43,680 Speaker 1: just it's there. They're very transparent about it, like they're 718 00:34:43,719 --> 00:34:46,759 Speaker 1: like we've got it's fifty fift points system. And then 719 00:34:46,800 --> 00:34:48,960 Speaker 1: as soon as like Bobby Bones won that one season. 720 00:34:49,040 --> 00:34:51,239 Speaker 1: Then it changed. Then it was like the judges, you know, 721 00:34:51,320 --> 00:34:54,920 Speaker 1: and then it changes. But like, you know what, just dance. 722 00:34:55,640 --> 00:34:58,120 Speaker 1: Just go out there, do your job and don't ask questions. 723 00:34:58,960 --> 00:35:02,719 Speaker 1: I'm just kidding the joke. I don't promote that. 724 00:35:03,840 --> 00:35:06,479 Speaker 3: What are the salaries of everybody on the show? 725 00:35:07,120 --> 00:35:13,320 Speaker 1: Wow? A couple of tears for me? You just ask. 726 00:35:14,239 --> 00:35:18,640 Speaker 3: Shocked me how much you made. But I'm saying, but 727 00:35:18,680 --> 00:35:21,239 Speaker 3: from the contestants to the pro do the pros make 728 00:35:21,280 --> 00:35:22,880 Speaker 3: different amounts. Actually I don't know, no. 729 00:35:22,960 --> 00:35:25,080 Speaker 1: They do. It's not favor nations. I don't know if 730 00:35:25,080 --> 00:35:28,520 Speaker 1: I'm but it's not like by the Way though, Senor 731 00:35:28,920 --> 00:35:31,200 Speaker 1: of course, because you have a lot of new new 732 00:35:31,280 --> 00:35:36,200 Speaker 1: dancers and yeah, I mean it's it's not favorite Nations 733 00:35:36,239 --> 00:35:39,320 Speaker 1: in that sense, but it is fair and like moving, 734 00:35:39,480 --> 00:35:40,000 Speaker 1: you know what I mean. 735 00:35:40,920 --> 00:35:44,279 Speaker 3: You still watch the current you have to, but the 736 00:35:44,320 --> 00:35:49,040 Speaker 3: current do you watch or is it an emotional difficult? 737 00:35:49,440 --> 00:35:52,799 Speaker 1: It's so it's everything, especially doing these rewatches, like I'm 738 00:35:52,840 --> 00:35:55,000 Speaker 1: just like, oh God, like sometimes I dread it because 739 00:35:55,000 --> 00:35:57,120 Speaker 1: I'm like, this is I don't even know what this 740 00:35:57,200 --> 00:35:59,520 Speaker 1: is going to bring up. But I've never seen until recently, 741 00:35:59,520 --> 00:36:02,680 Speaker 1: obviously doing these rewatches. I've never seen a whole show, 742 00:36:03,040 --> 00:36:06,480 Speaker 1: like a whole season, Like I've only selfishly fast forward it, 743 00:36:06,560 --> 00:36:08,560 Speaker 1: like and I watched mine because then I have to 744 00:36:08,560 --> 00:36:10,040 Speaker 1: train my partner the next day, so I have to 745 00:36:10,040 --> 00:36:12,480 Speaker 1: know what he did wrong. It's a whole assessment. But 746 00:36:12,600 --> 00:36:15,880 Speaker 1: to see the show as a whole, whoa, it's a 747 00:36:15,920 --> 00:36:19,160 Speaker 1: machine like it really is. And I understand that there's 748 00:36:19,200 --> 00:36:22,680 Speaker 1: a psychology of this whole show that no one speaks about. 749 00:36:22,920 --> 00:36:25,680 Speaker 1: That's untold. I'm still trying to figure it out. But 750 00:36:25,680 --> 00:36:28,600 Speaker 1: but as a viewer now I see things differently. So 751 00:36:28,680 --> 00:36:30,719 Speaker 1: like I don't like to see tension packages. I don't 752 00:36:30,760 --> 00:36:33,279 Speaker 1: like to see when people fight. It actually makes me 753 00:36:33,320 --> 00:36:36,960 Speaker 1: not want to vote for them. Oh wow, you want 754 00:36:36,960 --> 00:36:40,440 Speaker 1: to root for them? I don't if they fight? Oh no, no, 755 00:36:40,480 --> 00:36:40,680 Speaker 1: I know. 756 00:36:40,760 --> 00:36:42,719 Speaker 2: But I'm saying, you want to be inspired by them 757 00:36:42,719 --> 00:36:45,400 Speaker 2: and improve for them, and like the positive stories. 758 00:36:45,080 --> 00:36:48,120 Speaker 1: Yes, but not don't mask. And what I actually appreciate 759 00:36:48,560 --> 00:36:51,759 Speaker 1: in the prior seasons, the earlier seasons was that they 760 00:36:51,800 --> 00:36:54,120 Speaker 1: didn't they wasn't scripted. There was no script It was like, 761 00:36:54,560 --> 00:36:57,719 Speaker 1: this is the problem, ballroom's looking hard, and we're going 762 00:36:57,800 --> 00:37:00,319 Speaker 1: to have a fight. But we're not going to ask 763 00:37:00,400 --> 00:37:02,400 Speaker 1: it up with like and then we're doing the chata 764 00:37:02,560 --> 00:37:06,360 Speaker 1: chat and then like no, no, no. It was real reality 765 00:37:06,440 --> 00:37:09,680 Speaker 1: in the dance studio and something that I think they 766 00:37:09,719 --> 00:37:12,960 Speaker 1: should continue to do or add back because it's not 767 00:37:13,040 --> 00:37:16,440 Speaker 1: like that now as much, because like I said, not 768 00:37:16,560 --> 00:37:20,960 Speaker 1: everything is always Ryan Stone's spray tnds and love bugs. 769 00:37:21,600 --> 00:37:23,960 Speaker 3: But you even said that you don't want to see 770 00:37:24,000 --> 00:37:24,400 Speaker 3: the fighting. 771 00:37:24,520 --> 00:37:27,360 Speaker 1: No, but there's a difference of like struggle versus fighting. 772 00:37:27,920 --> 00:37:31,600 Speaker 1: Struggle struggle struggle to learn something, and like the freaking 773 00:37:31,719 --> 00:37:34,080 Speaker 1: like this is not easy, like the turnaround the two 774 00:37:34,120 --> 00:37:36,560 Speaker 1: three days. You have the pressure, the pressure, the pressure 775 00:37:36,640 --> 00:37:40,440 Speaker 1: versus like some tension that's like awkward. You're kind of 776 00:37:40,440 --> 00:37:44,239 Speaker 1: like are you guys doing the dirty or like there's 777 00:37:44,280 --> 00:37:47,640 Speaker 1: like that tension. Actual tension is always good for TV ratings, 778 00:37:47,800 --> 00:37:51,080 Speaker 1: right correct, But then there's like the fights, but then 779 00:37:51,120 --> 00:37:56,319 Speaker 1: there's like but then there's like the like the cat 780 00:37:56,520 --> 00:37:59,000 Speaker 1: like the not trusting each other fight that I don't 781 00:37:59,040 --> 00:37:59,600 Speaker 1: like to see. 782 00:38:00,280 --> 00:38:02,920 Speaker 3: And you all in totally random on who you got 783 00:38:02,920 --> 00:38:04,800 Speaker 3: paired up with. You had no control over it. We 784 00:38:04,840 --> 00:38:05,359 Speaker 3: don't have control. 785 00:38:05,360 --> 00:38:07,840 Speaker 1: I don't think it's random. On the executives. Yeah, but 786 00:38:08,239 --> 00:38:10,800 Speaker 1: we I mean I have I lived a very sheltered 787 00:38:10,840 --> 00:38:14,719 Speaker 1: life my mother, you know, thanks Harry Burke. But I 788 00:38:14,800 --> 00:38:16,399 Speaker 1: never knew my partner, so I had to google them. 789 00:38:16,400 --> 00:38:19,160 Speaker 1: So they had to brief me because I walk in 790 00:38:19,160 --> 00:38:21,600 Speaker 1: Emmitt Smith like, who are you like? And who were you? 791 00:38:22,040 --> 00:38:23,120 Speaker 1: Dreuliche I had. 792 00:38:23,000 --> 00:38:24,719 Speaker 3: No idea who were they trying to give you? Like 793 00:38:24,719 --> 00:38:26,600 Speaker 3: what type of person do you think they wanted to 794 00:38:26,600 --> 00:38:28,000 Speaker 3: link you pair you up with? 795 00:38:28,080 --> 00:38:31,080 Speaker 1: It depends on the season. Yeah, I think in the 796 00:38:31,120 --> 00:38:33,839 Speaker 1: beginning they didn't know me as much obviously, but I 797 00:38:33,880 --> 00:38:39,719 Speaker 1: think they saw my teaching ability, which was strict, like 798 00:38:39,800 --> 00:38:43,200 Speaker 1: a task master, maybe like a drill sergeant, you know. 799 00:38:43,239 --> 00:38:45,560 Speaker 1: And so they wouldn't give me someone like Donnie Osmond 800 00:38:45,560 --> 00:38:48,560 Speaker 1: put it that way, okay, right, because that was just 801 00:38:48,760 --> 00:38:51,759 Speaker 1: oh wow, that'd be right, Like that wouldn't work, Like 802 00:38:52,200 --> 00:38:54,600 Speaker 1: maybe he needed someone who was a little tender Kim, 803 00:38:54,640 --> 00:38:57,719 Speaker 1: a little bit more caring and loving in there. But 804 00:38:57,920 --> 00:39:00,600 Speaker 1: you give me a Ryan Lofty, I'll whip that. 805 00:39:01,000 --> 00:39:03,319 Speaker 3: We got I got you tell me who you got 806 00:39:03,360 --> 00:39:05,640 Speaker 3: when you got the name you got? Hell? Yeah? And 807 00:39:05,640 --> 00:39:06,480 Speaker 3: then who'd you get me? 808 00:39:06,560 --> 00:39:06,640 Speaker 4: Like? 809 00:39:06,640 --> 00:39:10,400 Speaker 3: Oh, give me a couple of people. 810 00:39:10,120 --> 00:39:13,560 Speaker 1: Where you I have to google everyone, but any athletes. 811 00:39:13,600 --> 00:39:15,839 Speaker 1: I'm like, hell, yes, yes, I love I just love 812 00:39:15,880 --> 00:39:22,640 Speaker 1: the mentality Tom Delay. I oh, how long ago was that? 813 00:39:23,560 --> 00:39:24,799 Speaker 1: Sixty nineteen sixty five? 814 00:39:25,000 --> 00:39:26,040 Speaker 3: Oh, while. 815 00:39:27,840 --> 00:39:30,360 Speaker 1: It was a while ago. I don't know what season, 816 00:39:30,440 --> 00:39:33,080 Speaker 1: but that was a that was interesting. I mean, mind you. 817 00:39:33,120 --> 00:39:35,560 Speaker 1: I had to google obviously, but then I was like, 818 00:39:35,640 --> 00:39:38,440 Speaker 1: oh god, this is gonna be great. And his family 819 00:39:38,520 --> 00:39:42,120 Speaker 1: was lovely. He taught me how to, you know, shoot 820 00:39:42,120 --> 00:39:42,840 Speaker 1: people not people. 821 00:39:42,880 --> 00:39:43,640 Speaker 3: I get it. 822 00:39:44,080 --> 00:39:50,399 Speaker 1: Targets, thank you, thank you, rubber duckies, ducky anywhere any 823 00:39:50,400 --> 00:39:52,080 Speaker 1: more probing questions, their teaching. 824 00:39:52,400 --> 00:39:53,719 Speaker 3: That was just about the show. That's what I happen, 825 00:39:53,719 --> 00:39:54,760 Speaker 3: all right, we got this, okay. 826 00:39:54,800 --> 00:39:56,560 Speaker 1: My favorite was when he asked you how much you made? 827 00:39:58,280 --> 00:39:59,960 Speaker 3: It's a legitimate question about the. 828 00:40:00,880 --> 00:40:02,920 Speaker 1: Just I mean, this is why you guys are you 829 00:40:02,960 --> 00:40:03,640 Speaker 1: do what you do? 830 00:40:04,239 --> 00:40:05,359 Speaker 3: It is getting hot in here now. 831 00:40:05,440 --> 00:40:08,359 Speaker 1: It is hot as like really though, like actually even 832 00:40:08,440 --> 00:40:11,920 Speaker 1: before this interview is a little well Sammy Cheryl, thank you, 833 00:40:12,000 --> 00:40:14,080 Speaker 1: We like we appreciate it. You just you came in here. 834 00:40:14,160 --> 00:40:16,719 Speaker 1: You did tell it all the sex, the lies and 835 00:40:16,800 --> 00:40:20,400 Speaker 1: that I don't have I know, I'm pretty white. Actually, 836 00:40:21,880 --> 00:40:24,360 Speaker 1: should lay out drink water. 837 00:40:26,800 --> 00:40:28,440 Speaker 3: So where are we going to tell everybody? Where are 838 00:40:28,440 --> 00:40:29,239 Speaker 3: they going to see you next? 839 00:40:29,480 --> 00:40:32,560 Speaker 1: You just hear me talk all things dancing with the 840 00:40:32,600 --> 00:40:37,080 Speaker 1: start and see me clips of it and yeah, and 841 00:40:37,160 --> 00:40:39,920 Speaker 1: I have a new actual dance program on my website 842 00:40:40,160 --> 00:40:42,719 Speaker 1: Cheryl Dashburg dot com. Body language has a lot to 843 00:40:42,719 --> 00:40:45,920 Speaker 1: do with somatic and like releasing the trauma out of 844 00:40:45,920 --> 00:40:51,440 Speaker 1: your body through movement and lots of up and coming. 845 00:40:51,520 --> 00:40:54,520 Speaker 1: I would say stuff that I shouldn't talk about yet, 846 00:40:54,600 --> 00:40:59,640 Speaker 1: but yeah, I just love podcasting. It really is, do 847 00:40:59,680 --> 00:41:01,760 Speaker 1: you guys? Love it is is like a new world 848 00:41:01,800 --> 00:41:04,320 Speaker 1: for you. Like it's so different. 849 00:41:04,400 --> 00:41:07,959 Speaker 3: Right, We've been in studio with you at a TV 850 00:41:08,040 --> 00:41:10,040 Speaker 3: studio before and we were never able to have a 851 00:41:10,080 --> 00:41:11,359 Speaker 3: conversation the way we just had. 852 00:41:11,680 --> 00:41:14,080 Speaker 1: Isn't it nice? It's like really, I mean honest, I 853 00:41:14,120 --> 00:41:15,759 Speaker 1: feel like I just had a therapy session. I'm going 854 00:41:15,800 --> 00:41:18,279 Speaker 1: to see my therapist on Friday. Like we should just 855 00:41:18,320 --> 00:41:23,520 Speaker 1: do one session, not too because we already knocked one 856 00:41:23,520 --> 00:41:27,480 Speaker 1: out right, love it free therapy. Yes, thank you guys 857 00:41:27,560 --> 00:41:28,440 Speaker 1: so much. Thank you