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Speaker 1: Hey, this is Sam.

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Speaker 2: This is John the og story Time podcast host. Oh yeah,

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Speaker 2: we got some great stories coming up.

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Speaker 1: But before that, we get a teeny two minute break

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Speaker 1: from the sponsors that keep this show propped up like

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Speaker 1: a little house.

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Speaker 3: Oh you, my mother evicted us from our home after

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Speaker 3: giving half of it to me.

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Speaker 2: Well, then she should only be able to evict half

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Speaker 2: of you.

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Speaker 3: Here we go. My mother has been impulsive and controlling

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Speaker 3: for as long as I can remember. Every relationship she's

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Speaker 3: ever had has been strained because of her behavior towards colleagues, siblings,

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Speaker 3: my dad, her ex husband, friends, and everyone else in

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Speaker 3: her path. By the way, this comes from Litney Spears

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Speaker 3: twelve and if you want to spend your own stories,

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Speaker 3: go to the r slash. Okay, Storytime separate it. I'm Sophia,

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Speaker 3: I'm Dakota, and Opie says. Three years ago, I got

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Speaker 3: a job opportunity in a different country, one where we

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Speaker 3: have a lot of family. I decided to take it

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Speaker 3: because I was excited for the opportunity to become closer

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Speaker 3: to them and experience life on a different continent. While

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Speaker 3: I was settling into my new life, my mother, who

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Speaker 3: is retired, visited shortly after and declared that she would

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Speaker 3: buy a home near my apartment and move to the country.

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Speaker 3: The problem was that this isn't possible due to immigration

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Speaker 3: laws to need a long term visa, not a tourist

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Speaker 3: visa for extended states. Her ego didn't allow no for

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Speaker 3: an answer, so she bought a beautiful beachfront property anyway

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Speaker 3: in hopes of gaining citizenship. Legally, she would only be

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Speaker 3: allowed up to ninety days, potentially one hundred and eighty

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Speaker 3: if extended. She couldn't believe what the case officer and

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Speaker 3: lawyer she hired were telling her, and she started arguing

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Speaker 3: with them about how much money she would donate to

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Speaker 3: society with her housing purchases. When reality finally set in

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Speaker 3: after several failed meetings, we decided it would be best

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Speaker 3: if I lived in the property to keep it maintained,

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Speaker 3: pay the bills, and she could visit whenever without worrying

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Speaker 3: about it being vacant. After some time I met my girlfriend,

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Speaker 3: we became serious and she moved in. My mother was

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Speaker 3: happy about how things were going for me and would

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Speaker 3: FaceTime with us regularly, really taking a liking tour. When

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Speaker 3: my girlfriend became pregnant and we announced the new news.

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Speaker 3: My mother was extremely happy and gifted me fifty percent

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Speaker 3: of the home.

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Speaker 4: As a present to us.

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Speaker 3: It was the nicest and most generous thing anyone had

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Speaker 3: ever done for me, something I never saw coming. Last summer,

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Speaker 3: she visited and planned to stay with us for six

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Speaker 3: months to help before and after the baby was born,

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Speaker 3: which was very kind. This is where the story turns

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Speaker 3: for the worst.

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Speaker 2: Uh oh, no, not for the worst.

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Speaker 3: A week or two into her visit, while my girlfriend

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Speaker 3: was six to seven months pregnant, she became very upset

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Speaker 3: with me in front of my girlfriends, all because I

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Speaker 3: had asked her earlier that day privately over tech about

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Speaker 3: not announcing our family's financial situation to the entire world.

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Speaker 3: She likes to brag to people about how much she

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Speaker 3: makes without working, the values of her homes, and similar things.

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Speaker 3: That type of behavior makes me uncomfortable because I've always

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Speaker 3: been a private person and I don't want people getting

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Speaker 3: the wrong impression of me or her. For context, my

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Speaker 3: mother is the most paranoid person on the planet. When

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Speaker 3: she's not in showing off boat, she contstantly thinks her

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Speaker 3: phone is being hacked, always reports random things to the FBI.

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Speaker 3: Because she fears people are after her money and only

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Speaker 3: uses her phone when she's in her room on Wi Fi.

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Speaker 3: Otherwise it's off essentially twenty one hours a day. Honestly,

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Speaker 3: you know what good for her? She's you know, no phone,

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Speaker 3: new screen. She's even reported some of her friends to

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Speaker 3: the police or FBI, accusing them of stealing money from

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Speaker 3: her bank accounts. My mother, father, and I never had

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Speaker 3: money growing up. My father always worked an honest job,

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Speaker 3: and so did I. After finishing college ten years ago,

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Speaker 3: she recently came into wealth after a massive inheritance from

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Speaker 3: a wealthy family friend who passed away five years ago.

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Speaker 3: She essentially convinced him to marry her to collect all

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Speaker 3: his assets, retirement accounts, homes, and everything he had accumulated

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Speaker 3: before he passed away in twenty twenty. During our argument

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Speaker 3: last summer, she kept saying she was punting us out,

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Speaker 3: that we needed to get our own place, and that

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Speaker 3: we were making her sick and could stress her out

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Speaker 3: enough to land her in the hospital. This was to say,

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Speaker 3: despite the fact that we were literally at work all

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Speaker 3: day like any regular person. My girlfriend became frightened of her,

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Speaker 3: and for good reason, because my mother was very agitated

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Speaker 3: for two days straight. She suddenly booked a flight back

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Speaker 3: to her country and left a note saying to look

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Speaker 3: for a new home and car, but we had to

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Speaker 3: leave the property by a specific date. After a week

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Speaker 3: or two, she reached out asking me to send her

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Speaker 3: listings and cars, which I didn't do because she was

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Speaker 3: just using that as a ploy to get back on

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Speaker 3: good terms. Instead, I focused on my career and my

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Speaker 3: girlfriend's health because it was getting tough in the weeks

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Speaker 3: before birth. Three months after my child was born, she

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Speaker 3: came back to help during the holidays and planned to

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Speaker 3: stay for six months. Again, we were hesitant based on

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Speaker 3: what had happened six months prior, but I was trying

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Speaker 3: to convince my girlfriend that maybe with her grandchild here,

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Speaker 3: she wouldn't cause issues because it would be a special

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Speaker 3: time for all of us. Maybe if we tell the

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Speaker 3: burglars it's Christmas, they.

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Speaker 2: Won't rob us. Ah, We're a sweet Christmas gift.

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Speaker 3: The first four week we were okay, but not great.

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Speaker 3: As I said before, she's overly controlling, constantly overstepping boundaries,

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Speaker 3: and worst of all, constantly trying to teach us how

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Speaker 3: to parent instead of letting us grow into our roles.

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Speaker 3: What broke my communication with her permanently is what happened next.

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Speaker 3: For the holidays, we visited my girlfriend's family two hours

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Speaker 3: away for a week. My mother had met her parents before,

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Speaker 3: but during this trip she turned into a completely different person.

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Speaker 3: She hardly spoke to them when they were hosting her,

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Speaker 3: and would blatantly ignore other family members who tried to

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Speaker 3: interact with her. During Christmas, we kept trying to take

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Speaker 3: our baby from people's hands and wouldn't participate in anything

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Speaker 3: we were doing, dinner games, trivia, gift opening, nothing. She

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Speaker 3: eventually left Christmas early and went back to my girlfriend's parents'

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Speaker 3: house without telling anyone, so I had to cover her

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Speaker 3: and tell everyone she was feeling sick. The next morning,

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Speaker 3: she called me at four am, very upset about how

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Speaker 3: she didn't get along with my girlfriend or family and

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Speaker 3: wanted to leave immediately. I couldn't even get a word

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Speaker 3: in before she demanded to be picked up. I drove

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Speaker 3: toget her and found her standing outside with her luggage

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Speaker 3: in the dark, demanding to take the train back home.

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Speaker 3: I told her there were no trains that early and

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Speaker 3: if she really wanted to leave, she had to wait

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Speaker 3: at the house where we were staying. I brought her back,

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Speaker 3: and my girlfriend casually said, Hi, what's going on while

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Speaker 3: holding our infant daughter. My mother became very agitated and

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Speaker 3: made hostile comments about how my girlfriend would never see

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Speaker 3: the inside of our home again for me or our family.

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Speaker 3: I don't think that's true. I think that Op's girlfriend

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Speaker 3: is probably going to see him, seeing as he's the

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Speaker 3: father of their collective child.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I think that's the smart money bet.

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Speaker 3: My girlfriend was clearly confused and shaken. I stepped between

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Speaker 3: them and pushed my mother and her stuff into the car,

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Speaker 3: before telling her firmly that she would never threaten my girlfriend,

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Speaker 3: especially while she was holding our daughter. I dropped her

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Speaker 3: at the train station and returned to explain everything to

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Speaker 3: my girlfriend, who was clearly shaken as was I. After

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Speaker 3: a few days of angry text my mother said she

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Speaker 3: had changed the locks and we would never go inside

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Speaker 3: the home again. She demanded we collect our personal belongings,

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Speaker 3: which made up about ninety five percent of what was

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Speaker 3: in the home. When my friends and I went over

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Speaker 3: to pack, she was there with some neighbors, people I

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Speaker 3: know she had hardly spoken to before, for reasons I

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Speaker 3: still don't understand. As I was leaving, I made sure

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Speaker 3: the neighbors knew what type of person she really was,

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Speaker 3: someone who will go to extreme lengths with zero regard

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Speaker 3: for anyone but herself. My family and I were lucky

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Speaker 3: enough to have shelter for two weeks until we could

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Speaker 3: finally secure the one apartment that was available during the

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Speaker 3: holiday season two and a half months past. We traveled

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Speaker 3: back to the States in early January, and two neighbors

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Speaker 3: had been going into my home to collect mine and

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Speaker 3: my girlfriend's mail because neither of them would give me

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Speaker 3: the new keys to my own house. They feared my

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Speaker 3: mother more than doing what was morally and legally right

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Speaker 3: for my family, and it has honestly been a very

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Speaker 3: stressful three to four months working full time trying to

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Speaker 3: keep my girlfriend's spirits high and maintaining structure and routine

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Speaker 3: for our while living in a cramped, tiny apartment. Because

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Speaker 3: we had no other options during the slow holiday season,

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Speaker 3: I consulted a lawyer and we proceeded with a forced

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Speaker 3: sale through the courts, which she didn't know about yet.

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Speaker 3: I also got a locksmith to change the locks so

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Speaker 3: I would have keys and rightful access to my own home. Again,

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Speaker 3: I didn't care if she showed up and couldn't get

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Speaker 3: in because the locks were chained. Am I the knuckle

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Speaker 3: head for forcing a sale on the home to cut

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Speaker 3: ties permanently? But there's an update with my lawyer. We

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Speaker 3: drafted a statement and provided extensive evidence on the situation,

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Speaker 3: which made it easier for them to decide. She had

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Speaker 3: zero legal representation during the proceedings and even admitted to

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Speaker 3: the judge that she needed to remove us forcefully and

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Speaker 3: immediately because we were rude and stressed her out with

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Speaker 3: our nonsense talking about your baby. What's your nonsense?

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Speaker 2: Nonsense? Being normal people normal?

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Speaker 3: She's like, they walk around and they eat, and they

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Speaker 3: they talk and.

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Speaker 2: They don't call the FBI on their friends.

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Speaker 3: Thank us. She admitted to changing the locks on us

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Speaker 3: and handing keys to the neighbors to prevent us from

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Speaker 3: entering and potentially damaging the home. Why would we do that?

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Speaker 3: That's our home where we started raising our family. The

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Speaker 3: courts laid out all of her bad faith acts and

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Speaker 3: illegal actions. Because we have strict rights as tenants, and

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Speaker 3: even more so because we have a child. The court

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Speaker 3: didn't take lightly to our actions that bordered on making

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Speaker 3: us homeless in winter before we found housing. My forced

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Speaker 3: court sale was approved immediately and she was ordered to

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Speaker 3: pay a fine, my legal fees, and hand over the

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Speaker 3: keys to our place. Within twenty four hours. We sent

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Speaker 3: a letter to the court demanding I pay for her

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Speaker 3: travel expenses because she had no idea she was being

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Speaker 3: taken to court. The court denied her request. Obviously, the

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Speaker 3: drama didn't end there. Our home took a hit because

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Speaker 3: the market was bad, but I didn't care because I

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Speaker 3: just wanted out of this mess and to get my money.

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Speaker 3: In the end, my lawyer emailed both of us that

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Speaker 3: it was sold and the deposit by the new tenant

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Speaker 3: was paid, the home would be theirs. On October first,

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Speaker 3: when that email came in, my mother lost her composure

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Speaker 3: and sent my lawyer and me about five frantic emails

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Speaker 3: stating that the price was unacceptable and needed to be

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Speaker 3: voided asa pete because now she wanted to keep the home.

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Speaker 3: Court orders don't work like that, as you all know,

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Speaker 3: their final no ifsands or butts. She was even on

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Speaker 3: record in three different documents to the court stating that

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Speaker 3: she came back to sell the place but didn't realize

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Speaker 3: the home had a court order hold on it because

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Speaker 3: I had filed for it through my lawyer months ago.

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Speaker 3: She's like, No, you don't understand I'm donating so much

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Speaker 3: of this money.

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Speaker 2: Yes, I was actually going to donate this house to

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Speaker 2: my bank account. Yes, to myself, I was going to

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Speaker 2: donate it.

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Speaker 3: Some of the emails she sent my lawyer and me

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Speaker 3: included offers to pay me double the money if she

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Speaker 3: could keep the place because it will not be let

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Speaker 3: go at that price, and how could you sell it

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Speaker 3: for forty percent less than I paid? Void it now?

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Speaker 5: Well.

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Speaker 3: She even went as far as asking for the new

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Speaker 3: tenants information so she could contact him.

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Speaker 2: Oh my god, I'd love to see how that conversation

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Speaker 2: rolls out. Hey, I know you bought my house. I

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Speaker 2: don't want you to buy it, and I also would

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Speaker 2: like you pay twice as much. Thank you back.

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Speaker 3: Please. My mother contacted her family back home and complained

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Speaker 3: about me again, as she has for nine to ten

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Speaker 3: months now. My aunts and cousins told her he did

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Speaker 3: what he had to to protect his family, and you

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Speaker 3: should honestly give him the rest of the money from

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Speaker 3: the sale because you clearly don't need it. He has

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Speaker 3: a family to support. And that was his home to

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Speaker 3: begin with. That's where his life is. She called them

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Speaker 3: all backstabbing people and hung up. I will receive a

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Speaker 3: nice payout in a few weeks, and she'll lose about

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Speaker 3: two and a half times what I will get. That's

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Speaker 3: a lesson to you, mother. You took it too far

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Speaker 3: this time.

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Speaker 2: I took my brother to court and now my parents

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Speaker 2: are lying to protect him.

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Speaker 3: I'm sueing all of you.

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Speaker 2: After I got it a degree in computer science, my

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00:12:01,679 --> 00:12:04,520
Speaker 2: brother and his two partners recruited me to work a

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Speaker 2: summer for them. They wanted me to set up infrastructure

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Speaker 2: for their new finance and investment company. By the way,

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Speaker 2: this comes from user C plus plus twenty seventeen, and

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Speaker 2: if you want to submit your own stories, go to

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Speaker 2: the r slash shokey Storytime subred it.

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Speaker 3: I'm Dakota, I'm Sophia.

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Speaker 2: And Op says. One summer turned into two years of

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Speaker 2: free work as secretary receptionist, systems Tech personal assistant, accountant

261
00:12:27,960 --> 00:12:31,760
Speaker 2: and research analyst. They paid me four or five times,

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00:12:31,800 --> 00:12:35,240
Speaker 2: totaling between seven to eight thousand dollars over two years.

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Speaker 2: When I left to start grad school, they were mad

264
00:12:37,600 --> 00:12:40,480
Speaker 2: I wouldn't stay when I finished grad school and put

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Speaker 2: them on my resume. They lied to prospective employers about me.

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Speaker 2: They denied I worked for them and said I was

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Speaker 2: trying to use my brother's name to get ahead. They

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Speaker 2: also accused me of visiting their office and spicily pestering

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Speaker 2: female employees they never even had.

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Speaker 3: Wait, don't they don't even exist? Yeah, such an easy

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Speaker 3: clim to dispute.

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Speaker 2: How to get sued? One oh one makeup lies like.

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Speaker 3: That, like oh Stacy said, oh p he was just

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Speaker 3: the worst. And they're like, oh, can Stacy please make

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Speaker 3: a statement, And they're like, well, then, yes, she is

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Speaker 3: quite shy. She goes to another school.

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Speaker 2: Ye, yes, Hold on one second, Hi, he was so rude.

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Speaker 2: I called to ask about it, and they, including my brother,

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Speaker 2: just laughed and said I was getting what I deserved,

280
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Speaker 2: Like it's what you get when you mess with us.

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Speaker 2: My counselor and other people from school, including my head hunter, headhunter, headmaster,

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Speaker 2: not sure help me get a job, But I had

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Speaker 2: to sue my brother and his partners for slander. My

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Speaker 2: brother had called to laugh about the lawsuit when they

285
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Speaker 2: got served. But now they're scared. My dad is pressuring

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Speaker 2: me to drop it and just sit down with them

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Speaker 2: to work something out. He called this quote big brother

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Speaker 2: bullying little brother nonsense and demanded I drop the lawsuit.

289
00:13:57,800 --> 00:14:00,400
Speaker 2: He and my mom uninvited me to Thanksgiving. My mom

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00:14:00,480 --> 00:14:02,560
Speaker 2: tried to stay out of it. I could tell this

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00:14:02,720 --> 00:14:05,240
Speaker 2: was hard for her. There's little to update legally. But

292
00:14:05,280 --> 00:14:07,839
Speaker 2: I had a laptop containing client lists that my brother

293
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Speaker 2: and his partners stole from their respective employers before starting

294
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Speaker 2: their own company. I didn't want to turn those files

295
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Speaker 2: over to my attorney because things were bad enough already.

296
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Speaker 2: My girlfriend disagreed. She wanted me to absolutely crush.

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Speaker 5: Them, destroy them.

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Speaker 2: I don't know if you should listen to your girlfriend here,

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Speaker 2: big dog.

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Speaker 3: I think you need to do what you need to

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Speaker 3: do for yourself. But I also think that pursuing a

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Speaker 3: lot of legal action for the sake of legal action

303
00:14:32,400 --> 00:14:34,320
Speaker 3: is going to be more hot. Like, do whatever is

304
00:14:34,360 --> 00:14:36,280
Speaker 3: not harmful to you. If you need to get this

305
00:14:36,360 --> 00:14:39,960
Speaker 3: legal action for your job, you know, for monetary compensation

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Speaker 3: against libel, do it.

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Speaker 2: I called my attorney. I told him about the files

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Speaker 2: and drop them off at his firm. On the night

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Speaker 2: on the tenth, I got a call saying my attorney

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Speaker 2: needed to see me immediately. When I went in, he

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Speaker 2: said the files would be turned over to the US

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Speaker 2: Attorney's office, so it was out of our hands now.

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Speaker 3: Because they were doing something illegal.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, okay. What he really wanted to talk about, though,

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Speaker 2: was my parents. We had spoken to my dad and

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Speaker 2: he was a world class a hole. According to my lawyer,

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Speaker 2: he's going to subpoena both parents for deposition and probably trial.

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Speaker 2: He wanted me to prepare for what they might say

319
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Speaker 2: about me, and made it clear there's no turning back now.

320
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Speaker 2: Since I didn't pay anything up front to my lawyer,

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Speaker 2: his firm is financially invested in calling the shots. I

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Speaker 2: think my attorneys thinks I'm weak or will back off.

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Speaker 2: He told me he knows my family would weaken me,

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Speaker 2: but I think he underestimates me. He told me to

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Speaker 2: brace for the heat my dad would bring. I said

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Speaker 2: I had two older sisters on my side and my

327
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Speaker 2: mother was neutral, but he assured me my mother is

328
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Speaker 2: absolutely not neutral and told me to prepare for anything.

329
00:15:42,440 --> 00:15:44,280
Speaker 2: I got phone calls from my two sisters, who live

330
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Speaker 2: about three hundred miles away. They had been disgusted with

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Speaker 2: my dad and brother's behavior and told me they were

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Speaker 2: one hundred percent behind me, but now they were saying

333
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Speaker 2: my girlfriend and I were uninvited from seeing them and

334
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Speaker 2: their children this Christmas. They said they love me, but

335
00:15:57,280 --> 00:16:00,800
Speaker 2: I needed to back off the lawsuit, which you can't anyone. Yeah,

336
00:16:00,840 --> 00:16:04,200
Speaker 2: because now the US Attorney's office is handling it as

337
00:16:04,240 --> 00:16:07,280
Speaker 2: a probably like a fraud case. Yeah.

338
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Speaker 3: I mean, there's not really much you can do anymore. Now.

339
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Speaker 2: This was shocking. It didn't crush me, but it wasn't

340
00:16:11,720 --> 00:16:14,720
Speaker 2: easy to hear they won't contact me anymore and want

341
00:16:14,760 --> 00:16:17,800
Speaker 2: me not to contact them. They both cried when they called,

342
00:16:17,880 --> 00:16:20,800
Speaker 2: but I stayed calm. They also emailed my girlfriend about

343
00:16:20,840 --> 00:16:24,280
Speaker 2: being uninvited. She blasted both of them with a scathing response,

344
00:16:24,320 --> 00:16:27,040
Speaker 2: and I wish she hadn't sent it, but it's her decision.

345
00:16:27,240 --> 00:16:30,000
Speaker 2: My dad is getting out of control. He confronted my

346
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Speaker 2: girlfriend and me outside of family friend's house after a

347
00:16:32,800 --> 00:16:35,240
Speaker 2: holiday get together Sunday night. They got heated and I

348
00:16:35,280 --> 00:16:38,080
Speaker 2: said things that were probably below the belt that almost

349
00:16:38,080 --> 00:16:40,680
Speaker 2: made him cry. His eyes watered as he tried not

350
00:16:40,800 --> 00:16:43,840
Speaker 2: to break down. Then my girlfriend jumped in and blasted

351
00:16:43,920 --> 00:16:46,520
Speaker 2: him like she did my sisters. The gloves had come

352
00:16:46,520 --> 00:16:49,160
Speaker 2: off for her. My mom stayed in dad's truck and watched,

353
00:16:49,200 --> 00:16:51,560
Speaker 2: but couldn't hear anything. My attorney said, My brother and

354
00:16:51,640 --> 00:16:54,840
Speaker 2: his partners already closed their business. They went under. They

355
00:16:54,840 --> 00:16:58,640
Speaker 2: filed puzzling and contradictory responses to our lawsuit, which surprised

356
00:16:58,640 --> 00:17:01,200
Speaker 2: me because my brother is usually smarter than that. They've

357
00:17:01,240 --> 00:17:04,080
Speaker 2: changed attorneys and retained a reputable firm. The first thing

358
00:17:04,119 --> 00:17:06,480
Speaker 2: the new attorneys did was ask what it would take

359
00:17:06,560 --> 00:17:09,159
Speaker 2: to settle. My attorney says, their new lawyers are smart

360
00:17:09,200 --> 00:17:11,280
Speaker 2: and know it would be a bloodbath in court. I'll

361
00:17:11,320 --> 00:17:13,000
Speaker 2: just have to wait and see where it goes. But

362
00:17:13,040 --> 00:17:16,720
Speaker 2: some of you commented from experience that blowback from legal

363
00:17:16,760 --> 00:17:19,800
Speaker 2: battles like this tears families apart for decades.

364
00:17:19,960 --> 00:17:21,120
Speaker 3: Well, I mean it already has.

365
00:17:21,440 --> 00:17:23,880
Speaker 2: Yeah. Uh, Op says, I can see how this will

366
00:17:23,920 --> 00:17:26,160
Speaker 2: probably happen. What do you think? And we haven't edit,

367
00:17:26,200 --> 00:17:28,040
Speaker 2: but before we get into it, yeah, I think it would.

368
00:17:28,720 --> 00:17:31,200
Speaker 3: Yeah, I mean we already see it here. I think

369
00:17:31,280 --> 00:17:33,240
Speaker 3: you need to have a conversation with your girlfriend about

370
00:17:33,440 --> 00:17:36,320
Speaker 3: what kind of role you want her to take in

371
00:17:36,560 --> 00:17:37,240
Speaker 3: defending you.

372
00:17:37,720 --> 00:17:41,639
Speaker 2: Yeah. I think having a sense of, you know, loyalty

373
00:17:41,680 --> 00:17:44,359
Speaker 2: to your partner's cool, but like crusading against their family

374
00:17:44,400 --> 00:17:46,919
Speaker 2: members can be a little dicey if you're not on

375
00:17:46,960 --> 00:17:50,200
Speaker 2: the exact same page. It feels like it's it feels

376
00:17:50,200 --> 00:17:52,040
Speaker 2: like it's escalated a lot because of that.

377
00:17:52,200 --> 00:17:54,680
Speaker 3: Like if I had an argument with my mom where

378
00:17:55,240 --> 00:17:56,800
Speaker 3: like shoes in the wrong or something, I don't know

379
00:17:56,800 --> 00:17:58,720
Speaker 3: if I would want, like a partner to start yelling

380
00:17:58,720 --> 00:18:00,800
Speaker 3: at my mom even if she's in the wrong.

381
00:18:01,000 --> 00:18:03,399
Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm already laying into my dad and to the

382
00:18:03,400 --> 00:18:05,439
Speaker 2: point where he's almost crying, and then you jump in

383
00:18:05,480 --> 00:18:08,000
Speaker 2: and go on top of it. I'm gonna be like, well, stuck,

384
00:18:08,040 --> 00:18:11,120
Speaker 2: I got this, I got this, this is my thing.

385
00:18:11,320 --> 00:18:13,520
Speaker 3: Yeah, But I don't know if that's how OP feels.

386
00:18:13,560 --> 00:18:16,439
Speaker 3: So like if OPI's all about this, then sure. It

387
00:18:16,560 --> 00:18:18,679
Speaker 3: just feels like from that last comment where he was like,

388
00:18:18,840 --> 00:18:21,240
Speaker 3: I wish she hadn't done that, I'm wondering if that's

389
00:18:21,320 --> 00:18:22,960
Speaker 3: kind of the general sentiment for this.

390
00:18:23,440 --> 00:18:25,639
Speaker 2: There is an edit. Some of you asked why my

391
00:18:25,720 --> 00:18:28,879
Speaker 2: sisters changed their minds. I know now that my dad

392
00:18:28,920 --> 00:18:31,520
Speaker 2: helped them both by their houses, they still owe him

393
00:18:31,520 --> 00:18:33,240
Speaker 2: a lot of money. My best guess as he used

394
00:18:33,240 --> 00:18:36,040
Speaker 2: that and maybe other things to coerce them into taking

395
00:18:36,080 --> 00:18:39,640
Speaker 2: his side. There's a downvoted comment that says, oh, man,

396
00:18:39,800 --> 00:18:42,560
Speaker 2: you'd better be prepared for no family gatherings for a very,

397
00:18:42,760 --> 00:18:44,600
Speaker 2: very long time. I don't think a lot of people

398
00:18:44,600 --> 00:18:46,359
Speaker 2: would have gone as far as you did, and that

399
00:18:46,480 --> 00:18:49,920
Speaker 2: certainly is your own choice. But who loses here now

400
00:18:50,000 --> 00:18:52,119
Speaker 2: in the name of justice. Your family could lose a

401
00:18:52,160 --> 00:18:54,240
Speaker 2: lot of money, and maybe they deserve it, But now

402
00:18:54,280 --> 00:18:56,800
Speaker 2: there's no benefit to anybody but your attorney. As far

403
00:18:56,840 --> 00:18:59,000
Speaker 2: as I can deduce from the situation, you are one

404
00:18:59,080 --> 00:19:02,719
Speaker 2: emotionally rock solid human being, perhaps a little too rocky,

405
00:19:02,880 --> 00:19:07,240
Speaker 2: and Opie replies they were making me unhirable, so filing

406
00:19:07,280 --> 00:19:09,119
Speaker 2: the lawsuit was something I had to do to clear

407
00:19:09,160 --> 00:19:11,600
Speaker 2: my name. The four big companies that I got interviews

408
00:19:11,640 --> 00:19:13,800
Speaker 2: with all said the same thing. They said they wouldn't

409
00:19:13,840 --> 00:19:16,040
Speaker 2: hire me because it looked as though I lied into

410
00:19:16,040 --> 00:19:21,560
Speaker 2: my resume, and also the spicily related pestermint thing scared

411
00:19:21,640 --> 00:19:24,920
Speaker 2: other companies away. I'm not suing my whole family. I'm

412
00:19:24,960 --> 00:19:27,320
Speaker 2: just suing my brother and his two partners. They have

413
00:19:27,400 --> 00:19:29,919
Speaker 2: a lot of money but would probably wind up broke

414
00:19:30,000 --> 00:19:32,320
Speaker 2: after this. My parents don't depend on my brother for

415
00:19:32,440 --> 00:19:35,080
Speaker 2: money at all. I did call them repeatedly and asked

416
00:19:35,119 --> 00:19:37,479
Speaker 2: them to stop, but they just laughed at me and

417
00:19:37,600 --> 00:19:40,280
Speaker 2: kept charging ahead and slandering me. It just became a

418
00:19:40,320 --> 00:19:42,320
Speaker 2: game to them, and they showed me zero respect. They

419
00:19:42,359 --> 00:19:44,199
Speaker 2: were hoping I'd have no job to go to and

420
00:19:44,200 --> 00:19:46,640
Speaker 2: would just come back and work for them again. That's

421
00:19:46,640 --> 00:19:49,560
Speaker 2: what they thought would happen. And that being the case,

422
00:19:49,760 --> 00:19:55,600
Speaker 2: OPI deserves to fully run his brother's pockets. Yeah, okay,

423
00:19:55,720 --> 00:19:59,200
Speaker 2: you're going to torpedo my actual career. Fine, I'm gonna

424
00:19:59,200 --> 00:20:02,080
Speaker 2: deflect the tor pedo and send it right back at you. Yeah.

425
00:20:02,080 --> 00:20:04,200
Speaker 3: Oops. Well I don't think I mean, like, I think

426
00:20:04,240 --> 00:20:06,200
Speaker 3: that that was pretty clear when they tried to get

427
00:20:06,240 --> 00:20:09,760
Speaker 3: him like charged for at like harassment and stuff that

428
00:20:09,800 --> 00:20:12,160
Speaker 3: they were. I don't think there's any problem with him

429
00:20:12,200 --> 00:20:15,040
Speaker 3: suing it, suing these people. I just think he didn't

430
00:20:15,080 --> 00:20:16,680
Speaker 3: want it to go as far as it was.

431
00:20:16,800 --> 00:20:19,360
Speaker 2: It was sending over the client list. Yeah, and now

432
00:20:19,400 --> 00:20:22,320
Speaker 2: it's like, okay, they're being investigated by the US government

433
00:20:22,359 --> 00:20:22,760
Speaker 2: for business.

434
00:20:22,960 --> 00:20:24,680
Speaker 3: Oh. He was like, well, I just wanted them to

435
00:20:24,880 --> 00:20:27,520
Speaker 3: get sued for what they did to me. Yeah. I

436
00:20:27,520 --> 00:20:29,160
Speaker 3: think I think. I don't think there was ever any

437
00:20:29,160 --> 00:20:30,959
Speaker 3: doubt that they deserve to get sued.

438
00:20:31,080 --> 00:20:33,960
Speaker 2: A deleted user says, how did you not see this coming?

439
00:20:34,080 --> 00:20:35,960
Speaker 2: I mean, you, of all people, should know what your

440
00:20:35,960 --> 00:20:38,679
Speaker 2: brother is like. OP says, this is the best and

441
00:20:38,760 --> 00:20:41,359
Speaker 2: hardest question I've gotten. I always knew my brother was

442
00:20:41,359 --> 00:20:44,200
Speaker 2: a little self absorbed. I just didn't know the extent

443
00:20:44,240 --> 00:20:46,600
Speaker 2: of it. Because of the age difference. I didn't associate

444
00:20:46,640 --> 00:20:48,600
Speaker 2: with him much because OPI is older. I think what

445
00:20:48,720 --> 00:20:50,760
Speaker 2: happened here is I truly believed I was helping my

446
00:20:50,840 --> 00:20:53,840
Speaker 2: brother for one summer, which quickly turned into two years.

447
00:20:53,960 --> 00:20:55,800
Speaker 2: I knew they would be mad when I left. I

448
00:20:55,880 --> 00:20:57,880
Speaker 2: knew after a few months that all three of them

449
00:20:57,920 --> 00:21:02,080
Speaker 2: were complete narssmos. I also thought that they would hate

450
00:21:02,080 --> 00:21:04,680
Speaker 2: me for leaving because they relied on me so much

451
00:21:04,720 --> 00:21:06,639
Speaker 2: to keep the company operating. I knew they would have

452
00:21:06,640 --> 00:21:08,879
Speaker 2: to hire five or six people to replace me, and

453
00:21:08,920 --> 00:21:11,920
Speaker 2: that is not an exaggeration. So I knew they would

454
00:21:11,960 --> 00:21:13,960
Speaker 2: be mad after that first year. I knew that this

455
00:21:14,000 --> 00:21:16,159
Speaker 2: would end up badly between me and my brother, but

456
00:21:16,200 --> 00:21:18,720
Speaker 2: I could have never guessed it would be this bad.

457
00:21:18,920 --> 00:21:21,439
Speaker 2: That's why I decided to go apply for grad school.

458
00:21:21,480 --> 00:21:24,000
Speaker 2: Sure Enough, when I finally left. All three of them

459
00:21:24,080 --> 00:21:26,520
Speaker 2: were really pissed at me. They had not one ounce

460
00:21:26,560 --> 00:21:29,159
Speaker 2: of gratitude for the two years of free labor. But

461
00:21:29,240 --> 00:21:31,520
Speaker 2: I never guessed they would slander me like that once

462
00:21:31,560 --> 00:21:33,679
Speaker 2: I tried to get a job, especially because when I

463
00:21:33,720 --> 00:21:36,119
Speaker 2: still was in grad school, they would call me to

464
00:21:36,160 --> 00:21:38,360
Speaker 2: come in on weekends and work for them. But by

465
00:21:38,400 --> 00:21:40,959
Speaker 2: then I was waiting tables at a restaurant near school,

466
00:21:41,080 --> 00:21:43,000
Speaker 2: and I had a couple of close friends who pretty

467
00:21:43,040 --> 00:21:45,760
Speaker 2: muchhook some sense into me because I actually considered going

468
00:21:45,840 --> 00:21:48,200
Speaker 2: back to help them part time while I finished school.

469
00:21:48,280 --> 00:21:50,280
Speaker 2: I guess I should have seen more of this coming,

470
00:21:50,320 --> 00:21:53,840
Speaker 2: but honestly, I was completely and utterly blindsided by them

471
00:21:53,840 --> 00:21:58,080
Speaker 2: slandering me and making up the whole pesttermint bs. As

472
00:21:58,080 --> 00:22:01,600
Speaker 2: self absorbed as they are, and I've never met more

473
00:22:01,640 --> 00:22:05,320
Speaker 2: self absorbed people. I truly was shocked that they came

474
00:22:05,359 --> 00:22:08,840
Speaker 2: that hard at me and showed absolutely no remorse. I

475
00:22:08,880 --> 00:22:11,199
Speaker 2: didn't want to go into so much detail again there

476
00:22:11,240 --> 00:22:13,280
Speaker 2: would be too much to type, but with what I'm

477
00:22:13,320 --> 00:22:15,720
Speaker 2: finding out about my brother through my attorney, it's worse

478
00:22:15,800 --> 00:22:18,800
Speaker 2: than I ever thought. Not paying me and slandering me

479
00:22:19,000 --> 00:22:21,199
Speaker 2: was just what I knew about. But now we know

480
00:22:21,320 --> 00:22:24,000
Speaker 2: that there was other stuff like fraud against me and

481
00:22:24,160 --> 00:22:27,840
Speaker 2: others that I hadn't known about, serious tax violations also

482
00:22:28,080 --> 00:22:31,680
Speaker 2: against me and against the irs, and some identity theft

483
00:22:31,720 --> 00:22:34,119
Speaker 2: where he used my name on some documents that I

484
00:22:34,160 --> 00:22:35,480
Speaker 2: didn't sign or even know about.

485
00:22:36,920 --> 00:22:41,960
Speaker 3: Yes, this guy's going to jail. Well again, I think

486
00:22:42,000 --> 00:22:44,080
Speaker 3: that it's gone a little bit too far. Like even

487
00:22:44,080 --> 00:22:46,760
Speaker 3: if OP did settle, I think that this guy would still.

488
00:22:46,600 --> 00:22:49,720
Speaker 2: Come to US Attorney's Office has it. You know, they've

489
00:22:49,720 --> 00:22:52,040
Speaker 2: got it him. The US Attorney's Office is going to

490
00:22:52,080 --> 00:22:54,159
Speaker 2: do what they're gonna do. But in terms of your

491
00:22:54,200 --> 00:22:55,520
Speaker 2: personal case, I think.

492
00:22:55,400 --> 00:22:57,920
Speaker 3: You should just settle. I agree, because I think he's

493
00:22:57,920 --> 00:23:00,560
Speaker 3: gonna go to jail. He's good, like he's going to get.

494
00:23:00,400 --> 00:23:02,919
Speaker 2: His kind of you know, it's gonna go to jail.

495
00:23:03,040 --> 00:23:05,880
Speaker 3: Yeah, something's gonna happen to him regardless of what you do.

496
00:23:06,160 --> 00:23:08,760
Speaker 3: So I feel like, if you're worried about your family dynamics,

497
00:23:08,800 --> 00:23:11,040
Speaker 3: you can be like, yeah, I'm settling. You know, everything

498
00:23:11,080 --> 00:23:12,240
Speaker 3: after this point is not me.

499
00:23:12,480 --> 00:23:15,240
Speaker 2: It sounds like they're right at that money level where

500
00:23:15,240 --> 00:23:18,720
Speaker 2: it's like not enough money to completely avoid jail by

501
00:23:18,840 --> 00:23:22,199
Speaker 2: just paying yeah, but also enough money to where the

502
00:23:22,240 --> 00:23:25,400
Speaker 2: people who are prosecuting them are like, ooh, you want

503
00:23:25,440 --> 00:23:27,439
Speaker 2: to take their money and make them go to jail. Yeah,

504
00:23:27,480 --> 00:23:29,879
Speaker 2: so they're eh, they're right in the danger zone. The

505
00:23:29,880 --> 00:23:32,399
Speaker 2: more they dig, the worse it gets. At some point,

506
00:23:32,480 --> 00:23:34,840
Speaker 2: it's almost easier to just tell them to stop digging.

507
00:23:35,000 --> 00:23:38,000
Speaker 2: Let's just go with what we have. I know one thing,

508
00:23:38,160 --> 00:23:40,160
Speaker 2: I was very lucky I left them when I did,

509
00:23:40,320 --> 00:23:43,000
Speaker 2: Otherwise I may have been dragged down with them and

510
00:23:43,119 --> 00:23:46,480
Speaker 2: legal trouble they have coming their way. The Shine policy says,

511
00:23:46,600 --> 00:23:49,280
Speaker 2: what did your girlfriends say to your dad? What did

512
00:23:49,320 --> 00:23:52,120
Speaker 2: you say? Op says, I posted that in a summary

513
00:23:52,200 --> 00:23:54,640
Speaker 2: in a long comment somewhere on the post. But basically,

514
00:23:54,760 --> 00:23:57,600
Speaker 2: my dad questioned my morals, so I brought up stuff

515
00:23:57,640 --> 00:24:01,320
Speaker 2: about him. He cheated on my mother a long time ago.

516
00:24:01,400 --> 00:24:04,800
Speaker 2: Oh uh, he got a DUI, but gave the cops

517
00:24:04,840 --> 00:24:08,320
Speaker 2: his brother's name, and his brother took the rap for

518
00:24:08,400 --> 00:24:12,120
Speaker 2: that about twenty five years ago. Oh my god, stag

519
00:24:12,400 --> 00:24:17,000
Speaker 2: whoa whoa. His brother is no longer alive, so it

520
00:24:17,080 --> 00:24:19,119
Speaker 2: hurt him that I brought up how he treated his

521
00:24:19,240 --> 00:24:23,160
Speaker 2: late brother. There was other stuff about him having been excommunicated,

522
00:24:23,200 --> 00:24:24,080
Speaker 2: from a church.

523
00:24:24,000 --> 00:24:26,560
Speaker 3: So it was ex communicating for.

524
00:24:26,680 --> 00:24:29,560
Speaker 2: Ripping off many of the members when he had a

525
00:24:29,600 --> 00:24:33,280
Speaker 2: small construction business when he used his brother's license, which,

526
00:24:33,320 --> 00:24:36,040
Speaker 2: by the way, my dad had his revoked for being

527
00:24:36,080 --> 00:24:36,560
Speaker 2: a crook.

528
00:24:36,760 --> 00:24:37,880
Speaker 3: That's insane.

529
00:24:38,280 --> 00:24:41,679
Speaker 2: No wonder your brother had fraudulent business practices.

530
00:24:41,960 --> 00:24:48,840
Speaker 3: You were ex communicated for defrauding the congregation with your

531
00:24:49,080 --> 00:24:50,560
Speaker 3: bad construction business.

532
00:24:50,840 --> 00:24:51,280
Speaker 2: Wow.

533
00:24:51,520 --> 00:24:54,800
Speaker 3: Yeah, your old family seems like they're a little bit eh.

534
00:24:55,359 --> 00:24:58,560
Speaker 2: Yeah. Then my girlfriend asked him how it felt to

535
00:24:58,560 --> 00:25:00,720
Speaker 2: go to church five days a week, which he does,

536
00:25:00,920 --> 00:25:03,280
Speaker 2: and then come out and be the crook that he is.

537
00:25:03,520 --> 00:25:05,719
Speaker 2: She asked him what he was going to do if

538
00:25:05,800 --> 00:25:08,320
Speaker 2: judgment day came tomorrow for him. She asked, what are

539
00:25:08,359 --> 00:25:10,159
Speaker 2: you going to do? Give God your brother's name and

540
00:25:10,200 --> 00:25:12,000
Speaker 2: say that he did all those things and not you.

541
00:25:12,320 --> 00:25:16,760
Speaker 3: Ooo. You know what, I'm back on the girlfriend's side.

542
00:25:17,119 --> 00:25:19,920
Speaker 3: I'm back on I'm personally back on the girlfriend's side. Yeah.

543
00:25:19,920 --> 00:25:24,320
Speaker 2: Honestly, if bag Vinnie over here is trying to tell

544
00:25:24,359 --> 00:25:27,680
Speaker 2: me my morals are corrupted after that stuff, yeah get

545
00:25:27,720 --> 00:25:28,240
Speaker 2: him girlfriend.

546
00:25:28,359 --> 00:25:32,600
Speaker 3: That's that is a like a clap back. Cool. Yeah,

547
00:25:32,720 --> 00:25:33,760
Speaker 3: I like the girlfriend now.

548
00:25:33,880 --> 00:25:37,000
Speaker 2: Another commenter says, if you don't want to settle, don't

549
00:25:37,040 --> 00:25:39,879
Speaker 2: do it. As said in the thread, it would be

550
00:25:39,920 --> 00:25:41,919
Speaker 2: a bloodbath in front of a judge and jury. Your

551
00:25:41,960 --> 00:25:44,560
Speaker 2: brother and his friends are so bizarre. Why work so

552
00:25:44,680 --> 00:25:47,359
Speaker 2: hard to not pay an excellent worker or prevent you

553
00:25:47,400 --> 00:25:49,920
Speaker 2: from having a real job. That makes no sense. Op

554
00:25:50,000 --> 00:25:53,280
Speaker 2: He says, they have a very good answer for your question.

555
00:25:53,440 --> 00:25:55,960
Speaker 2: Here was their reasoning. They wanted me to get licensed

556
00:25:56,000 --> 00:25:58,280
Speaker 2: and bonded in their field, which I did, but I

557
00:25:58,480 --> 00:26:01,320
Speaker 2: just had the license and still didn't know much about investments.

558
00:26:01,400 --> 00:26:03,920
Speaker 2: They figured once I get licensed that people would flock

559
00:26:03,960 --> 00:26:06,240
Speaker 2: to me and bring their portfolios. They wanted me to

560
00:26:06,280 --> 00:26:08,879
Speaker 2: call all my friend's parents and to anyone I knew

561
00:26:08,880 --> 00:26:11,719
Speaker 2: to come see us for a free portfolio review. And

562
00:26:11,760 --> 00:26:14,199
Speaker 2: then they said they would close the deal and I

563
00:26:14,240 --> 00:26:16,600
Speaker 2: would make so much money that I would be swimming

564
00:26:16,640 --> 00:26:18,080
Speaker 2: in it. So that's how I found out in the

565
00:26:18,160 --> 00:26:20,160
Speaker 2: end that they planned on paying me all along. They

566
00:26:20,160 --> 00:26:23,040
Speaker 2: figured after they made me filthy rich, they wouldn't owe

567
00:26:23,040 --> 00:26:26,120
Speaker 2: anything anymore. That's how delusional they were, and that's why

568
00:26:26,200 --> 00:26:29,639
Speaker 2: I finally left. They're like, we're paying you in futures

569
00:26:29,840 --> 00:26:30,800
Speaker 2: that don't exist.

570
00:26:30,920 --> 00:26:36,080
Speaker 3: Don't you worry? Yeah, you're getting bitcoin, but like when

571
00:26:36,080 --> 00:26:37,800
Speaker 3: it is useless.

572
00:26:37,200 --> 00:26:39,439
Speaker 2: Just that they're paying you. We're gonna pay you in

573
00:26:39,480 --> 00:26:41,120
Speaker 2: the money that you'll make in the future.

574
00:26:41,400 --> 00:26:41,840
Speaker 3: Mm hmm.

575
00:26:42,000 --> 00:26:44,520
Speaker 2: But that's not the money you owe me right now.

576
00:26:44,560 --> 00:26:48,200
Speaker 2: That's the money you'd owe me in the future. It's crazy.

577
00:26:48,600 --> 00:26:49,919
Speaker 3: That doesn't make sense.

578
00:26:50,480 --> 00:26:55,400
Speaker 2: Yeah, there is an update from the girlfriend's perspective.

579
00:26:54,720 --> 00:26:57,280
Speaker 3: Whoa girlfriends propective.

580
00:26:56,880 --> 00:27:01,080
Speaker 2: Five months later. Let me be get by saying I

581
00:27:01,119 --> 00:27:03,320
Speaker 2: am not the ope, I'm his girlfriend.

582
00:27:03,359 --> 00:27:03,639
Speaker 4: Whoop.

583
00:27:03,680 --> 00:27:06,159
Speaker 2: We live together and I read the update post. My

584
00:27:06,200 --> 00:27:08,280
Speaker 2: boyfriend is moving on and wasn't going to post a

585
00:27:08,359 --> 00:27:10,480
Speaker 2: last update, so I asked if I could, and he

586
00:27:10,560 --> 00:27:13,360
Speaker 2: said yes. Things have wrapped up. They signed a settlement

587
00:27:13,400 --> 00:27:15,600
Speaker 2: agreement and now it's up to the judge to approve it.

588
00:27:15,680 --> 00:27:17,679
Speaker 2: The judge won't do that for two more weeks, but

589
00:27:17,720 --> 00:27:20,680
Speaker 2: apparently that's just a formality. The attorneys say it is

590
00:27:20,720 --> 00:27:23,000
Speaker 2: a sure thing he'll approve it. As far as the settlement,

591
00:27:23,000 --> 00:27:25,040
Speaker 2: I can't really disclose much, but I can say it's

592
00:27:25,040 --> 00:27:27,240
Speaker 2: close to what my boyfriend was suing for in terms

593
00:27:27,240 --> 00:27:30,200
Speaker 2: of money. They had transferred their houses to their wives' names,

594
00:27:30,240 --> 00:27:34,879
Speaker 2: which are being sold to pay off the settlement. Ooh,

595
00:27:35,000 --> 00:27:37,520
Speaker 2: tough sucks to suck dude. Shouldn't have done that?

596
00:27:37,560 --> 00:27:38,440
Speaker 3: Shouldn't it have been a crook.

597
00:27:38,560 --> 00:27:41,760
Speaker 2: The settlement included a written apology and completed admission of

598
00:27:41,760 --> 00:27:44,200
Speaker 2: guilt from all three defendants. They also have to write

599
00:27:44,200 --> 00:27:47,879
Speaker 2: apology letters and retractions to all the employers that refused

600
00:27:47,960 --> 00:27:50,840
Speaker 2: to hire my boyfriend based on their slander. I think

601
00:27:50,880 --> 00:27:53,400
Speaker 2: there were four companies in all. All three had their

602
00:27:53,440 --> 00:27:56,840
Speaker 2: licenses taken away and will never work as financial advisors

603
00:27:56,880 --> 00:28:00,200
Speaker 2: again in any state. They also face a criminal investigation

604
00:28:00,280 --> 00:28:02,800
Speaker 2: due to forged signatures on some deals, which will lead

605
00:28:02,840 --> 00:28:06,080
Speaker 2: to conviction, but probably no jail time. According to the experts,

606
00:28:06,240 --> 00:28:09,760
Speaker 2: financially they are beyond ruined, which is what I thought

607
00:28:09,760 --> 00:28:12,520
Speaker 2: they deserved the whole time. I agree, Yeah, I know

608
00:28:12,600 --> 00:28:15,280
Speaker 2: my boyfriend regrets this whole thing, and I understand that

609
00:28:15,480 --> 00:28:18,159
Speaker 2: it's still his family and they were close at some point,

610
00:28:18,200 --> 00:28:20,600
Speaker 2: but I think he's better off without them. It's easy

611
00:28:20,600 --> 00:28:23,080
Speaker 2: for me to say though. His parents are totally a

612
00:28:23,119 --> 00:28:25,960
Speaker 2: lost cause. I don't think there will be a reconciliation

613
00:28:26,040 --> 00:28:28,560
Speaker 2: in this lifetime after what's happened. I thought my boyfriend

614
00:28:28,560 --> 00:28:30,879
Speaker 2: would be open to one. When the dust settled, but

615
00:28:30,960 --> 00:28:33,720
Speaker 2: now I don't. During the mediation hearings, his mom and

616
00:28:33,800 --> 00:28:37,240
Speaker 2: dad both testified, and they both lied, But I knew

617
00:28:37,240 --> 00:28:39,360
Speaker 2: his crooked dad was going to do that. I was

618
00:28:39,440 --> 00:28:41,560
Speaker 2: just shocked that the mother lied about there having been

619
00:28:41,600 --> 00:28:43,880
Speaker 2: a verbal agreement that my boyfriend would work for his

620
00:28:43,920 --> 00:28:47,400
Speaker 2: brother's company in exchange for room and board at the parents' house,

621
00:28:47,560 --> 00:28:50,440
Speaker 2: and that the dad had also been paying him in cash.

622
00:28:50,640 --> 00:28:53,400
Speaker 2: She said she witnessed my boyfriend refusing payment from his

623
00:28:53,480 --> 00:28:56,200
Speaker 2: brother many times. She lied about a lot of other

624
00:28:56,320 --> 00:28:59,120
Speaker 2: very hurtful things right there while my boyfriend sat and

625
00:28:59,160 --> 00:29:01,680
Speaker 2: watched her. I ever looked at him, not once. His

626
00:29:01,760 --> 00:29:03,880
Speaker 2: dad never looked at him either, but at least sat

627
00:29:03,920 --> 00:29:06,440
Speaker 2: there the whole time. After he testified to support his

628
00:29:06,480 --> 00:29:09,440
Speaker 2: older son and his friends. His mother left the room

629
00:29:09,520 --> 00:29:13,200
Speaker 2: crying after she testified. I was not shocked that she testified,

630
00:29:13,240 --> 00:29:15,520
Speaker 2: because the attorney had said she might, but I was

631
00:29:15,560 --> 00:29:18,880
Speaker 2: extremely shocked about the horrible things she said about my boyfriend.

632
00:29:19,040 --> 00:29:21,560
Speaker 2: She will someday regret doing that to her son. I'm

633
00:29:21,600 --> 00:29:23,640
Speaker 2: sure she probably regrets it already.

634
00:29:23,720 --> 00:29:25,560
Speaker 3: Yeah. I mean, if she left the room crying, it's

635
00:29:25,600 --> 00:29:26,880
Speaker 3: gonna come back to bite her.

636
00:29:27,560 --> 00:29:30,800
Speaker 2: What she did to her younger son is inexcusable. I

637
00:29:30,960 --> 00:29:33,600
Speaker 2: was beyond disgusted that she had done that. She really

638
00:29:33,640 --> 00:29:35,600
Speaker 2: has no clue how much damage she did to her

639
00:29:35,640 --> 00:29:37,920
Speaker 2: youngest son. I doubt he'll ever get over it, and

640
00:29:38,000 --> 00:29:40,200
Speaker 2: I doubt he will ever want to see her again.

641
00:29:40,320 --> 00:29:42,960
Speaker 2: She lied and said disgusting things about him, and he's

642
00:29:42,960 --> 00:29:45,600
Speaker 2: the only good son she has. He's the only one

643
00:29:45,600 --> 00:29:48,200
Speaker 2: who doesn't owe his dad anything. He's the only one

644
00:29:48,200 --> 00:29:50,560
Speaker 2: with compassion in high morals, and the only one who

645
00:29:50,600 --> 00:29:53,600
Speaker 2: constantly worried about her and kept in touch with her.

646
00:29:53,680 --> 00:29:57,240
Speaker 2: She messed up in the most disgusting way. How could

647
00:29:57,320 --> 00:29:59,600
Speaker 2: she do that? He was there for her more than

648
00:29:59,680 --> 00:30:02,760
Speaker 2: the their three kids put together, all for a lawsuit

649
00:30:03,080 --> 00:30:05,479
Speaker 2: that she had to know they were going to lose.

650
00:30:05,600 --> 00:30:09,200
Speaker 2: Her testimony did nothing to help their case whatsoever. She

651
00:30:09,280 --> 00:30:13,200
Speaker 2: testified for absolutely no reason. We sent Christmas gifts to

652
00:30:13,240 --> 00:30:16,200
Speaker 2: the boyfriend's sisters and their daughters. We received thank you

653
00:30:16,280 --> 00:30:19,400
Speaker 2: cards in return. They haven't contacted my boyfriend since, but

654
00:30:19,520 --> 00:30:22,520
Speaker 2: I have received a couple of hello emails from one

655
00:30:22,560 --> 00:30:25,680
Speaker 2: of them. She never mentions my boyfriend or the family problems,

656
00:30:25,960 --> 00:30:29,240
Speaker 2: just says hello and asks how I'm doing I responded

657
00:30:29,280 --> 00:30:31,880
Speaker 2: by saying, we're both good and hope they're doing good

658
00:30:31,880 --> 00:30:34,160
Speaker 2: as well. I'm not sure where this will go, but

659
00:30:34,240 --> 00:30:36,480
Speaker 2: it's a small step in what seems like will be

660
00:30:36,560 --> 00:30:39,719
Speaker 2: a long road before they're allowed by their father to

661
00:30:39,800 --> 00:30:42,920
Speaker 2: reconcile with their brother, or until they have the courage

662
00:30:42,920 --> 00:30:45,280
Speaker 2: to do so without their dad's blessing.

663
00:30:45,080 --> 00:30:47,320
Speaker 3: Until they pay off all the money they oh.

664
00:30:46,960 --> 00:30:51,040
Speaker 2: Exactly, honestly, as the father, you're a crook, you're scam.

665
00:30:50,760 --> 00:30:52,960
Speaker 3: Artist, you're scamming your own kids.

666
00:30:52,880 --> 00:30:58,280
Speaker 2: And you also are responsible for your son having practiced

667
00:30:58,320 --> 00:31:01,280
Speaker 2: business in this way. Yes, no way, he would have

668
00:31:01,520 --> 00:31:05,400
Speaker 2: been a fraud had you not guided him to become one.

669
00:31:05,240 --> 00:31:06,040
Speaker 3: Bunch of frauds.

670
00:31:06,040 --> 00:31:08,200
Speaker 2: So this is really a really good opportunity for the

671
00:31:08,320 --> 00:31:12,280
Speaker 2: dad to sink to think upon his sins or his mistakes.

672
00:31:12,720 --> 00:31:14,440
Speaker 3: Well, he spends so much in time, you know, so

673
00:31:14,520 --> 00:31:16,280
Speaker 3: much time in church. You would hope that he does.

674
00:31:16,360 --> 00:31:17,720
Speaker 2: But yeah, I would hope.

675
00:31:17,720 --> 00:31:18,120
Speaker 3: So yeah.

676
00:31:18,280 --> 00:31:21,200
Speaker 2: I think both of the sisters are too embarrassed to

677
00:31:21,320 --> 00:31:24,360
Speaker 2: contact my boyfriend directly. I can sense that they're trying

678
00:31:24,360 --> 00:31:26,840
Speaker 2: to find a way that will eventually lead them to him,

679
00:31:26,880 --> 00:31:29,200
Speaker 2: and I think they need to just contact him, But

680
00:31:29,280 --> 00:31:31,560
Speaker 2: that's not my decision to make. I keep looking at

681
00:31:31,560 --> 00:31:34,440
Speaker 2: this from my perspective, and my family is really close,

682
00:31:34,720 --> 00:31:37,240
Speaker 2: so it's hard to watch what's going on with his family.

683
00:31:37,400 --> 00:31:40,080
Speaker 2: I just think, what the heck, why do you do

684
00:31:40,200 --> 00:31:42,200
Speaker 2: this to each other? But this is just the way

685
00:31:42,240 --> 00:31:44,880
Speaker 2: it is. To be clear, I knew very early on

686
00:31:45,120 --> 00:31:48,000
Speaker 2: that my boyfriend's parents were toxic. I initially just wanted

687
00:31:48,080 --> 00:31:49,800
Speaker 2: him to cut all ties with them. The way they

688
00:31:49,880 --> 00:31:52,479
Speaker 2: sided with the older brother, knowing how he tried to

689
00:31:52,480 --> 00:31:55,880
Speaker 2: destroy his own little brother's career, told me a lot.

690
00:31:56,000 --> 00:31:57,920
Speaker 2: I think, you know, you did what you had to do.

691
00:31:58,440 --> 00:32:03,920
Speaker 3: Yeah, these people, clearly, you know, have kind of backwards

692
00:32:03,960 --> 00:32:07,040
Speaker 3: morals if they're willing to sell you down the river

693
00:32:07,280 --> 00:32:10,680
Speaker 3: for another son who's absolutely a criminal.

694
00:32:10,760 --> 00:32:13,240
Speaker 2: Yeah you know. And hey, you're going to swing like

695
00:32:13,280 --> 00:32:15,760
Speaker 2: a big dog. Try swinging at the real big dog.

696
00:32:15,880 --> 00:32:20,240
Speaker 2: Now you're batting against the US Attorney's office. Yeah, you

697
00:32:20,280 --> 00:32:24,120
Speaker 2: should have been maybe just a scooch nicer to the

698
00:32:24,120 --> 00:32:27,760
Speaker 2: person who could, I don't know, orchestrate your entire downfall.

699
00:32:28,120 --> 00:32:31,000
Speaker 3: Yep, give them all the information, which he really hope

700
00:32:31,000 --> 00:32:31,400
Speaker 3: he took it.

701
00:32:31,480 --> 00:32:33,880
Speaker 2: He didn't even want to do. No, he did not

702
00:32:34,280 --> 00:32:37,880
Speaker 2: want to do this. Y'all pushed op to this point.

703
00:32:37,960 --> 00:32:39,880
Speaker 3: All you had to do is let him put you

704
00:32:39,920 --> 00:32:42,680
Speaker 3: guys on the resume. That's it. You could have avoided

705
00:32:42,680 --> 00:32:44,360
Speaker 3: this entire thing straight up.

706
00:32:44,400 --> 00:32:46,240
Speaker 2: All you had to do is be nice. Let's finish

707
00:32:46,240 --> 00:32:48,920
Speaker 2: this story. I wished back when all this started that

708
00:32:49,040 --> 00:32:51,520
Speaker 2: my boyfriend would have just disowned them, but I knew

709
00:32:51,520 --> 00:32:54,400
Speaker 2: that was unrealistic. At the time. I knew I was emotional,

710
00:32:54,560 --> 00:32:56,680
Speaker 2: and I backed off when I saw how stressed my

711
00:32:56,720 --> 00:32:59,760
Speaker 2: boyfriend was. But things escalated, and now I think my

712
00:32:59,800 --> 00:33:03,280
Speaker 2: boy boyfriend's mom has dealt a final blow to any

713
00:33:03,360 --> 00:33:06,560
Speaker 2: chance of reconciliation. I'm not just saying that because I'm

714
00:33:06,600 --> 00:33:09,400
Speaker 2: against it. I'm not for it, and I'm disgusted with her,

715
00:33:09,560 --> 00:33:11,720
Speaker 2: but I can see the damage she did up close.

716
00:33:11,840 --> 00:33:13,960
Speaker 2: I'm afraid he may never forgive her. She just went

717
00:33:14,080 --> 00:33:17,160
Speaker 2: overboard in such a horrible way. I've been talking to

718
00:33:17,240 --> 00:33:19,920
Speaker 2: my dad about this the whole time, and everything has

719
00:33:19,960 --> 00:33:23,360
Speaker 2: turned out exactly as he said it would. Everybody, all

720
00:33:23,480 --> 00:33:27,280
Speaker 2: parties are destroyed. It's like an explosive went off and

721
00:33:27,360 --> 00:33:29,960
Speaker 2: everybody got hit. And that is the end of that story.

722
00:33:30,160 --> 00:33:32,959
Speaker 2: There you go, and folks, it's just you know, they

723
00:33:33,000 --> 00:33:37,040
Speaker 2: were doing illegal, illicit business practices. I don't think I

724
00:33:37,080 --> 00:33:42,640
Speaker 2: don't think anyone girlfriend included was predicting that it would

725
00:33:42,640 --> 00:33:44,080
Speaker 2: be as serious as it was.

726
00:33:44,520 --> 00:33:48,120
Speaker 3: When you screw over a person who knows about all

727
00:33:48,160 --> 00:33:52,880
Speaker 3: of your illegal business activities, expects for that to.

728
00:33:52,840 --> 00:33:55,480
Speaker 2: Go poorly for you, Yeah, I mean beyond that. I

729
00:33:55,520 --> 00:33:57,680
Speaker 2: don't even know if op knew. I don't think OPI

730
00:33:57,800 --> 00:34:00,760
Speaker 2: knew how or a sketchy their businesses. But if you

731
00:34:00,960 --> 00:34:03,280
Speaker 2: are sketchy businessman.

732
00:34:03,160 --> 00:34:08,040
Speaker 6: Be nice to your employees incredibly uh wild move to

733
00:34:08,600 --> 00:34:12,919
Speaker 6: like torpedo and take shots at the person who first

734
00:34:12,960 --> 00:34:15,360
Speaker 6: of all just helped you even set up as a

735
00:34:15,360 --> 00:34:16,360
Speaker 6: business in the first place.

736
00:34:16,440 --> 00:34:20,280
Speaker 2: And then I don't know, as the ability to start

737
00:34:20,440 --> 00:34:21,799
Speaker 2: litigation against.

738
00:34:21,560 --> 00:34:25,160
Speaker 3: You, silly, silly, good luck OPI though, but you gotta.

739
00:34:25,239 --> 00:34:27,359
Speaker 2: It's just to let it be known. Like, if you're

740
00:34:27,400 --> 00:34:30,760
Speaker 2: going to start down a litigation path with your family

741
00:34:30,960 --> 00:34:34,040
Speaker 2: and there's bad business involved, it's it can get it

742
00:34:34,040 --> 00:34:37,160
Speaker 2: gets me real crazy. Yeah, so I would I would

743
00:34:37,200 --> 00:34:42,120
Speaker 2: always recommend when it's family involved stuff, sitting down first

744
00:34:42,280 --> 00:34:45,320
Speaker 2: and being like, look I could do this, I don't

745
00:34:45,600 --> 00:34:49,080
Speaker 2: want to do this, but if we cannot figure something

746
00:34:49,080 --> 00:34:53,960
Speaker 2: out amongst ourselves, you know, in writing, I'm gonna do this, yep.

747
00:34:54,560 --> 00:34:58,640
Speaker 2: I think there always deserves that, that conversation deserves to

748
00:34:58,680 --> 00:35:01,640
Speaker 2: be had, you know. In almost in the vast majority

749
00:35:01,680 --> 00:35:03,560
Speaker 2: of cases, some things are pretty cut and dry.

750
00:35:03,719 --> 00:35:05,719
Speaker 1: Hey, it's sam og Hos. We're going get back to

751
00:35:05,760 --> 00:35:08,359
Speaker 1: these delectable stories. But here's three minutes of ads from

752
00:35:08,360 --> 00:35:09,799
Speaker 1: our sponsors to help support the show.

753
00:35:10,280 --> 00:35:13,279
Speaker 4: I discovered my husband's affair, and I'm pretending I don't

754
00:35:13,320 --> 00:35:13,759
Speaker 4: know a thing.

755
00:35:13,960 --> 00:35:14,880
Speaker 5: Why are we pretending?

756
00:35:15,120 --> 00:35:19,600
Speaker 4: I Female forty found out about six months ago. I

757
00:35:19,840 --> 00:35:24,439
Speaker 4: went into total shock. I thought he Male thirty nine

758
00:35:24,640 --> 00:35:27,000
Speaker 4: loved me because he tells me that every day. We

759
00:35:27,080 --> 00:35:30,680
Speaker 4: have a beautiful family together, three beautiful children four five

760
00:35:30,800 --> 00:35:35,440
Speaker 4: and sixteen months, beautiful home, vacation home. We are close

761
00:35:35,520 --> 00:35:38,080
Speaker 4: to both of our families, and everything else is perfect.

762
00:35:38,239 --> 00:35:41,120
Speaker 4: By the way, this comes up from Long Dress nineteen

763
00:35:41,160 --> 00:35:43,080
Speaker 4: forty seven. And if you want to submit your own stories,

764
00:35:43,080 --> 00:35:45,160
Speaker 4: go to the r slash Okay storytime, separate it.

765
00:35:45,680 --> 00:35:47,719
Speaker 5: And I'm Angie and I'm Keon, and.

766
00:35:47,719 --> 00:35:51,640
Speaker 4: Op says she Female thirty five is a coworker of

767
00:35:51,719 --> 00:35:54,239
Speaker 4: my husband that I know very well. She has been

768
00:35:54,320 --> 00:35:57,000
Speaker 4: in my home. I have comforted her when her husband

769
00:35:57,040 --> 00:35:59,720
Speaker 4: cheated on her and left her for his new woman.

770
00:36:00,360 --> 00:36:03,400
Speaker 4: I saw her pain. Little did I know that she

771
00:36:03,440 --> 00:36:07,040
Speaker 4: would inflict that same pain on me. A few months later,

772
00:36:07,280 --> 00:36:11,320
Speaker 4: I saw her spicy photos on his phone talk about

773
00:36:11,320 --> 00:36:12,719
Speaker 4: their hookups on Messenger.

774
00:36:13,440 --> 00:36:14,920
Speaker 3: She isn't even beautiful.

775
00:36:15,239 --> 00:36:19,560
Speaker 4: She is disgusting, pathetic, and miserable. I know I'm being

776
00:36:19,600 --> 00:36:22,920
Speaker 4: a disgusting misandress here, but I can't help myself.

777
00:36:23,280 --> 00:36:25,319
Speaker 3: What does she have that I don't.

778
00:36:25,840 --> 00:36:30,360
Speaker 4: He disgusts me very much. He is pathetic and stupid.

779
00:36:30,560 --> 00:36:34,319
Speaker 4: My respect for him is gone. I have chosen to

780
00:36:34,320 --> 00:36:36,920
Speaker 4: pretend that I don't know. I love my life, and

781
00:36:36,960 --> 00:36:40,279
Speaker 4: I'll be danged if I share my children and not

782
00:36:40,400 --> 00:36:42,720
Speaker 4: be able to see them every day of their lives.

783
00:36:43,680 --> 00:36:47,680
Speaker 4: Not him nor her deserve me separating from my babies,

784
00:36:47,840 --> 00:36:51,880
Speaker 4: my home, my family, my comfortable life, and my safety.

785
00:36:52,520 --> 00:36:55,040
Speaker 4: Sometimes I think that he knows that I know when

786
00:36:55,040 --> 00:36:56,839
Speaker 4: he looks at me and asks me to come back

787
00:36:56,880 --> 00:36:59,560
Speaker 4: to him, Like when he asks where I am when

788
00:36:59,560 --> 00:37:02,439
Speaker 4: I'm in my thoughts. It feels like your body is here,

789
00:37:02,520 --> 00:37:05,479
Speaker 4: but your mind is one thousand miles away. I don't

790
00:37:05,520 --> 00:37:08,920
Speaker 4: answer him, he starts to argue. Sometimes it feels like

791
00:37:08,960 --> 00:37:11,000
Speaker 4: he is doing it to provoke a reaction out of me,

792
00:37:11,120 --> 00:37:14,600
Speaker 4: but I never answer or engage until he gets tired

793
00:37:14,920 --> 00:37:18,359
Speaker 4: and leaves me alone. I never initiate anything with him,

794
00:37:18,400 --> 00:37:20,919
Speaker 4: and when he has me, I just let him and

795
00:37:21,080 --> 00:37:24,560
Speaker 4: I refuse to let him pleasure me. In the beginning,

796
00:37:24,600 --> 00:37:27,040
Speaker 4: he complained that I'm distant and cold, and that I

797
00:37:27,080 --> 00:37:29,239
Speaker 4: want him to use protection. I told him that I

798
00:37:29,280 --> 00:37:32,280
Speaker 4: stopped using birth control so he has to wear protection.

799
00:37:32,920 --> 00:37:35,959
Speaker 4: His complaining stopped when I told him that it's either

800
00:37:36,040 --> 00:37:39,759
Speaker 4: this or nothing. Six months later, I am mostly at

801
00:37:39,760 --> 00:37:42,400
Speaker 4: peace with my life. Still a lot of ups and downs,

802
00:37:42,400 --> 00:37:45,800
Speaker 4: but the downs are getting fewer and further apart. Today

803
00:37:46,040 --> 00:37:48,560
Speaker 4: was a down, so I needed to vent. The part

804
00:37:48,600 --> 00:37:50,920
Speaker 4: of my heart and thoughts that were occupied with my

805
00:37:51,000 --> 00:37:54,000
Speaker 4: husband were suddenly empty, and I have found out that

806
00:37:54,040 --> 00:37:56,560
Speaker 4: I'm pretty good at filling the void with other things,

807
00:37:56,880 --> 00:37:59,400
Speaker 4: new hobbies and even more quality time with my babies

808
00:37:59,440 --> 00:37:59,960
Speaker 4: and loved ones.

809
00:38:00,640 --> 00:38:03,200
Speaker 2: All is well, But what are your thoughts?

810
00:38:03,280 --> 00:38:06,480
Speaker 4: Acrobatic mechanic two six five says, it seems that you've

811
00:38:06,520 --> 00:38:08,880
Speaker 4: already emotionally checked out and really just staying for the

812
00:38:08,960 --> 00:38:11,000
Speaker 4: kids in the life that you have. I hope you

813
00:38:11,040 --> 00:38:14,640
Speaker 4: find peace for the life you chose, and significant Owl says,

814
00:38:15,040 --> 00:38:18,400
Speaker 4: is he the breadwinner? Girl? You have many options, especially

815
00:38:18,400 --> 00:38:20,919
Speaker 4: with proof of the affair. You'd be surprised how many

816
00:38:20,920 --> 00:38:23,600
Speaker 4: men don't fight for their children. I think you staying

817
00:38:23,640 --> 00:38:26,040
Speaker 4: and distancing yourself got yourself through a lot of hurt

818
00:38:26,360 --> 00:38:29,319
Speaker 4: that would have come if you just separated. Talk to

819
00:38:29,360 --> 00:38:31,560
Speaker 4: a therapist if it will help, But don't teach your

820
00:38:31,640 --> 00:38:34,400
Speaker 4: kids this is the type of love they should settle for.

821
00:38:34,640 --> 00:38:36,200
Speaker 5: Yes, that's so true.

822
00:38:36,280 --> 00:38:38,480
Speaker 4: Yeah, it's just the whole thing of like staying for

823
00:38:38,520 --> 00:38:41,160
Speaker 4: the kids really isn't It's not, But I mean it

824
00:38:41,239 --> 00:38:43,560
Speaker 4: is kind of interesting though, because she is staying for

825
00:38:43,600 --> 00:38:46,920
Speaker 4: the kids, but not staying for their emotions. She's staying

826
00:38:46,960 --> 00:38:49,480
Speaker 4: so that she can just have this life the kids.

827
00:38:49,760 --> 00:38:53,400
Speaker 5: Yeah, just very complicated, very complicated, and again showing that

828
00:38:53,440 --> 00:38:56,399
Speaker 5: relationship and dynamic between you and your husband where it's

829
00:38:56,440 --> 00:39:00,239
Speaker 5: just very closed off or very cold shoulderish. Yeah, and

830
00:39:00,280 --> 00:39:03,279
Speaker 5: it's just a you know, not a yelling match, but

831
00:39:03,680 --> 00:39:06,719
Speaker 5: like just a table tennis match of like who can

832
00:39:06,800 --> 00:39:08,799
Speaker 5: hit it harder or like what have you? And they're

833
00:39:08,800 --> 00:39:11,160
Speaker 5: going to witness that and see that growing up is

834
00:39:11,239 --> 00:39:11,719
Speaker 5: not fair.

835
00:39:11,800 --> 00:39:15,040
Speaker 4: True. True, Yeah, this is why so many of us

836
00:39:15,080 --> 00:39:17,000
Speaker 4: are messed up in the head and allow other people

837
00:39:17,040 --> 00:39:19,759
Speaker 4: to mistreat them. There's so much life and love in

838
00:39:19,800 --> 00:39:23,520
Speaker 4: the world. Oh, he responds, he is the main breadwinner. Yes,

839
00:39:23,640 --> 00:39:25,719
Speaker 4: we had to fight about a month ago or not

840
00:39:25,800 --> 00:39:28,759
Speaker 4: if I more of him complaining that I'm distant and neglectful.

841
00:39:28,960 --> 00:39:31,080
Speaker 4: And he asked me what I wanted and kept asking

842
00:39:31,160 --> 00:39:34,000
Speaker 4: and pestering me. I said, I wanted him to leave

843
00:39:34,040 --> 00:39:37,520
Speaker 4: me and give me my children. I would leave everything

844
00:39:37,560 --> 00:39:40,399
Speaker 4: else to him. He was stunned for a while. Then

845
00:39:40,440 --> 00:39:42,839
Speaker 4: when he calms down, he said that I should take

846
00:39:42,880 --> 00:39:45,359
Speaker 4: this idea out of my head. Then I'm crazy. If

847
00:39:45,360 --> 00:39:47,680
Speaker 4: he thought that he would abandon the children. I mean,

848
00:39:48,280 --> 00:39:51,480
Speaker 4: I mean, you know pros and cons. Pros he's a

849
00:39:51,520 --> 00:39:54,040
Speaker 4: good dad, he does it, would have abandoned his children.

850
00:39:54,120 --> 00:39:54,520
Speaker 2: Cons.

851
00:39:54,560 --> 00:39:56,280
Speaker 4: She won't have full custody if they separate.

852
00:39:56,760 --> 00:40:00,440
Speaker 5: Con he's he says, I want abandon the chill, but

853
00:40:00,480 --> 00:40:02,960
Speaker 5: you kind of did that when you abandon your wife.

854
00:40:03,120 --> 00:40:05,680
Speaker 4: Okay, Willingness says, if he comes out and asks you,

855
00:40:05,800 --> 00:40:08,680
Speaker 4: if you know what would you do wig, would you

856
00:40:08,719 --> 00:40:12,240
Speaker 4: make a deal for the kids. Opie says, I won't lie.

857
00:40:12,360 --> 00:40:14,680
Speaker 4: I will tell him that I know that I don't

858
00:40:14,680 --> 00:40:17,160
Speaker 4: want shared custody, and that's why I don't want a divorce.

859
00:40:17,600 --> 00:40:18,480
Speaker 5: I don't think.

860
00:40:18,280 --> 00:40:20,960
Speaker 4: He will, though he's probably as scared as I am

861
00:40:21,040 --> 00:40:25,160
Speaker 4: that this will come tumbling down a ladder. Yard says,

862
00:40:25,320 --> 00:40:28,640
Speaker 4: I feel like this other woman knows exactly what she's doing.

863
00:40:28,760 --> 00:40:30,480
Speaker 4: She knows what it feels like to be cheated on.

864
00:40:30,680 --> 00:40:33,760
Speaker 4: She knows the hurt and devastation. She wanted to destroy

865
00:40:33,880 --> 00:40:37,480
Speaker 4: someone else's happiness. As someone whose spouse cheated, I could

866
00:40:37,520 --> 00:40:40,200
Speaker 4: never cause the same pain to another woman. My ex

867
00:40:40,280 --> 00:40:42,439
Speaker 4: left me for that other woman left me with two

868
00:40:42,480 --> 00:40:45,480
Speaker 4: small children. Funny thing she hated me. She would tell

869
00:40:45,480 --> 00:40:48,960
Speaker 4: my kids horrible lies about me. I had never met

870
00:40:48,960 --> 00:40:51,680
Speaker 4: this woman, never spoke to her. I never understood why

871
00:40:51,760 --> 00:40:54,920
Speaker 4: she had so much hate. They got married and then divorced.

872
00:40:55,320 --> 00:40:57,840
Speaker 4: My daughter and her daughter are still friends. I adore

873
00:40:57,880 --> 00:41:00,520
Speaker 4: this girl and love her son. I wouldn't dream of

874
00:41:00,560 --> 00:41:03,320
Speaker 4: saying one cross word about her mom. She mentioned to

875
00:41:03,360 --> 00:41:05,200
Speaker 4: her mom that her son really likes me, and then

876
00:41:05,200 --> 00:41:07,600
Speaker 4: she spouted off about me being a horrible person.

877
00:41:08,040 --> 00:41:08,920
Speaker 3: She told my daughter.

878
00:41:09,080 --> 00:41:10,759
Speaker 4: I told my mom that she is not allowed to

879
00:41:10,760 --> 00:41:13,040
Speaker 4: talk to her about me. She said that I was

880
00:41:13,080 --> 00:41:16,279
Speaker 4: a nice lady who never said anything about her. I

881
00:41:16,320 --> 00:41:18,600
Speaker 4: couldn't believe that she stood up for me. I hope

882
00:41:18,640 --> 00:41:21,880
Speaker 4: you find your peace. Opie response to that, it takes

883
00:41:21,880 --> 00:41:24,359
Speaker 4: two to tango. She might have wanted to inflict her

884
00:41:24,360 --> 00:41:27,359
Speaker 4: pain on a happy, unsuspecting woman just to feel better

885
00:41:27,400 --> 00:41:30,240
Speaker 4: about herself, just to feel that this doesn't only happen

886
00:41:30,280 --> 00:41:33,160
Speaker 4: to her. But a good man would not have fallen

887
00:41:33,200 --> 00:41:35,799
Speaker 4: for this. He would have turned her down. I hate her,

888
00:41:35,960 --> 00:41:38,600
Speaker 4: but he is the one who destroyed my happiness. She

889
00:41:38,719 --> 00:41:41,399
Speaker 4: can't have children, and her husband's new woman has given

890
00:41:41,440 --> 00:41:44,520
Speaker 4: birth to their first child. Oh wow. I think she

891
00:41:44,640 --> 00:41:47,280
Speaker 4: wanted to take out her hurt on a mother because,

892
00:41:47,280 --> 00:41:50,240
Speaker 4: in her mind, her husband cheated because she couldn't conceive

893
00:41:50,800 --> 00:41:53,399
Speaker 4: he cheated because he is a bad person and she

894
00:41:53,520 --> 00:41:56,080
Speaker 4: will never get it. Oh that is hard. That is

895
00:41:56,120 --> 00:42:00,120
Speaker 4: hard to We do have an update, but woof dude, woofy.

896
00:42:00,120 --> 00:42:04,960
Speaker 5: This is not pretty. I just I don't know. It's again,

897
00:42:05,160 --> 00:42:08,400
Speaker 5: you're scared for your kids, but it's also like, what

898
00:42:08,440 --> 00:42:10,120
Speaker 5: about your well being?

899
00:42:10,400 --> 00:42:10,640
Speaker 4: Right?

900
00:42:10,680 --> 00:42:12,840
Speaker 5: Like, this isn't fair to you to be living in

901
00:42:12,880 --> 00:42:16,280
Speaker 5: a household with someone who deems like a traitor, yeah,

902
00:42:16,280 --> 00:42:19,520
Speaker 5: and like who lied to you and lies to you

903
00:42:19,680 --> 00:42:23,839
Speaker 5: consistently exactly, it's like just rip off the band aid,

904
00:42:24,320 --> 00:42:26,719
Speaker 5: be like I know the truth, yeah, because it's like

905
00:42:26,719 --> 00:42:28,880
Speaker 5: it's also if she seems like it's like a burden

906
00:42:29,040 --> 00:42:31,560
Speaker 5: that just like I know this the truth, and right,

907
00:42:31,760 --> 00:42:34,080
Speaker 5: I can go about my day, Lottie, Dottie exactly.

908
00:42:34,200 --> 00:42:36,320
Speaker 4: And I mean if if she is so worried about

909
00:42:36,440 --> 00:42:39,799
Speaker 4: getting a divorce when she like tells him about it,

910
00:42:40,040 --> 00:42:43,160
Speaker 4: I mean, I don't know if that is too much

911
00:42:43,200 --> 00:42:45,600
Speaker 4: of a worry because obviously he's chill with doing that

912
00:42:45,719 --> 00:42:48,480
Speaker 4: and staying so obviously that's not what she would want

913
00:42:48,480 --> 00:42:51,000
Speaker 4: in a marriage, right, But if she's okay with like

914
00:42:51,360 --> 00:42:53,880
Speaker 4: dealing with this anyway and just ignoring it, I wonder

915
00:42:53,920 --> 00:42:56,440
Speaker 4: if they can work something out where it's like maybe

916
00:42:56,440 --> 00:42:59,440
Speaker 4: she can go off gallivanting with other people or something

917
00:42:59,480 --> 00:43:01,839
Speaker 4: like that and they just kind of co parent. But

918
00:43:02,000 --> 00:43:06,120
Speaker 4: I don't know, in the same house, yeah, or or

919
00:43:06,200 --> 00:43:10,000
Speaker 4: because he's willing to, like or because he hasn't divorced yet,

920
00:43:10,040 --> 00:43:12,080
Speaker 4: then maybe he doesn't want to run off with that

921
00:43:12,200 --> 00:43:15,200
Speaker 4: other woman and he wants to stay and fix things.

922
00:43:15,440 --> 00:43:20,120
Speaker 5: That's probably the only way to know is literally by

923
00:43:20,480 --> 00:43:22,840
Speaker 5: talking to him and that I know what you're doing.

924
00:43:23,360 --> 00:43:24,719
Speaker 5: What now? What do we do?

925
00:43:24,800 --> 00:43:26,280
Speaker 3: But we do have an update anyway.

926
00:43:26,440 --> 00:43:29,440
Speaker 4: My husband had made me dinner and brought me flowers

927
00:43:29,440 --> 00:43:31,600
Speaker 4: and chocolate. He said he wanted to make it a

928
00:43:31,719 --> 00:43:33,560
Speaker 4: night for the two of us because he felt that

929
00:43:33,600 --> 00:43:36,040
Speaker 4: we were pulling apart. The kids were sleeping and he

930
00:43:36,120 --> 00:43:38,920
Speaker 4: wanted me and then got upset because it wasn't how

931
00:43:38,960 --> 00:43:41,840
Speaker 4: he imagined the evening would go and accused me of

932
00:43:41,920 --> 00:43:45,920
Speaker 4: not loving him or our family anymore. I got really

933
00:43:45,960 --> 00:43:48,280
Speaker 4: angry when he accused me of not loving my family

934
00:43:48,400 --> 00:43:50,879
Speaker 4: when they're all I have left to give me love

935
00:43:50,960 --> 00:43:53,680
Speaker 4: and hope. I snapped at him that I didn't feel

936
00:43:53,719 --> 00:43:56,480
Speaker 4: safe with him anymore, and he knew full well why

937
00:43:56,520 --> 00:43:59,240
Speaker 4: I had become this way, you know the reason why.

938
00:43:59,520 --> 00:44:03,560
Speaker 4: He was shocked and looked emmy without saying anything, and

939
00:44:03,600 --> 00:44:06,120
Speaker 4: then just sat silent on his end of the sofa

940
00:44:06,200 --> 00:44:08,879
Speaker 4: for the rest of the evening. Before bed, he asked

941
00:44:08,920 --> 00:44:10,960
Speaker 4: me to tell him how I would feel safe again,

942
00:44:11,080 --> 00:44:12,920
Speaker 4: and to tell him what I wanted him to do.

943
00:44:13,760 --> 00:44:16,600
Speaker 4: He went to bed. I stayed up all night and

944
00:44:16,640 --> 00:44:19,759
Speaker 4: made a list of demands. Okay, she knows what she want,

945
00:44:19,920 --> 00:44:23,440
Speaker 4: so here are the demands. I want a post nuptial

946
00:44:23,480 --> 00:44:26,040
Speaker 4: agreement where I get my house and my summer home.

947
00:44:26,800 --> 00:44:29,720
Speaker 4: I become a partner at his companies at fifty percent.

948
00:44:30,000 --> 00:44:31,919
Speaker 4: I don't know how these things work, since I won't

949
00:44:31,920 --> 00:44:34,040
Speaker 4: be buying in, but this is for him to fix.

950
00:44:34,520 --> 00:44:36,880
Speaker 4: I'm not interested in management, just that I have my

951
00:44:37,040 --> 00:44:39,839
Speaker 4: half and the passive income. I want him to get

952
00:44:39,840 --> 00:44:42,759
Speaker 4: of aseectomy. We were planning four children before all this,

953
00:44:42,920 --> 00:44:45,480
Speaker 4: but I don't want that anymore, so he should have

954
00:44:45,520 --> 00:44:48,120
Speaker 4: of asseect me. I want him to always wear protection

955
00:44:48,200 --> 00:44:51,359
Speaker 4: with me or never bother to touch me again. I

956
00:44:51,440 --> 00:44:55,319
Speaker 4: will not even tolerate complaining about that part. I also

957
00:44:55,640 --> 00:44:59,359
Speaker 4: want bi annual STI tests. This morning, I sent him

958
00:44:59,400 --> 00:45:01,759
Speaker 4: a text with these demands. I know it's silly to

959
00:45:01,800 --> 00:45:04,120
Speaker 4: send someone you live with the text, but I didn't

960
00:45:04,160 --> 00:45:06,880
Speaker 4: want to fumble with my words and forget details. I

961
00:45:06,880 --> 00:45:09,840
Speaker 4: didn't want him to see me cry or be visibly emotional.

962
00:45:10,120 --> 00:45:12,880
Speaker 4: I just couldn't take him trying to console me. Just

963
00:45:12,920 --> 00:45:16,200
Speaker 4: the thought of him feeling sorry for me makes me sick.

964
00:45:16,840 --> 00:45:19,239
Speaker 4: But also I didn't want to forget anything and I

965
00:45:19,280 --> 00:45:20,840
Speaker 4: wanted it to be in writing.

966
00:45:20,840 --> 00:45:24,520
Speaker 5: At this point, it seems like you just hate your husband. Yeah,

967
00:45:24,520 --> 00:45:26,080
Speaker 5: Like and I know, I know he's like, oh, he

968
00:45:26,160 --> 00:45:29,279
Speaker 5: is the breadwinner, but like I it's like why why

969
00:45:29,440 --> 00:45:32,480
Speaker 5: forced yourself to be around him? Or you know, it's

970
00:45:32,520 --> 00:45:35,360
Speaker 5: like it's it's such a sticky situation. I know you

971
00:45:35,400 --> 00:45:37,319
Speaker 5: want to do for co parenting and like you don't

972
00:45:37,320 --> 00:45:38,759
Speaker 5: want to band to the kids, but it's like you

973
00:45:38,800 --> 00:45:41,279
Speaker 5: literally look at this guy and you're like, I I

974
00:45:41,440 --> 00:45:43,160
Speaker 5: literally don't want to talk to.

975
00:45:43,080 --> 00:45:45,279
Speaker 4: You, right, I know, it's kind of interesting. So, I

976
00:45:45,280 --> 00:45:47,399
Speaker 4: mean we had the like one thing of the post

977
00:45:47,480 --> 00:45:50,400
Speaker 4: nuptial agreements, which was like okay, but then like but

978
00:45:50,760 --> 00:45:52,919
Speaker 4: like I just kind of assumed then that everything else

979
00:45:52,920 --> 00:45:55,680
Speaker 4: would be like after a divorce, but you just reminded

980
00:45:55,680 --> 00:45:57,319
Speaker 4: me that that's not what she wants to.

981
00:45:57,560 --> 00:45:59,759
Speaker 5: Yeah, it's like, you don't want to divorce this man,

982
00:45:59,800 --> 00:46:03,360
Speaker 5: but I don't know, it's like, yeah, pick one or

983
00:46:03,400 --> 00:46:03,759
Speaker 5: the other.

984
00:46:04,200 --> 00:46:07,520
Speaker 4: Yeah, exactly. He read it on the breakfast table and

985
00:46:07,600 --> 00:46:10,480
Speaker 4: he didn't say anything. If we continue the day as normal,

986
00:46:10,560 --> 00:46:12,239
Speaker 4: and when the children were in bed, we had our

987
00:46:12,239 --> 00:46:16,880
Speaker 4: dinner and he said about your demands, I agree. I

988
00:46:16,880 --> 00:46:19,520
Speaker 4: told him to start on Monday with realizing my list,

989
00:46:19,920 --> 00:46:23,400
Speaker 4: and he agreed. Okay, so I guess since many of

990
00:46:23,440 --> 00:46:25,839
Speaker 4: you asked me to take measurements and have a backup plan,

991
00:46:26,360 --> 00:46:28,560
Speaker 4: this is what I could come up with and it

992
00:46:28,600 --> 00:46:31,360
Speaker 4: did help. I woke up today a little bit less anxious.

993
00:46:31,680 --> 00:46:33,400
Speaker 4: I don't know how long we can keep this up,

994
00:46:33,440 --> 00:46:35,560
Speaker 4: but I hope until I feel safe to leave my

995
00:46:35,680 --> 00:46:38,560
Speaker 4: babies in his care, maybe when they're all in school.

996
00:46:38,960 --> 00:46:41,880
Speaker 5: My resentment for my husband has built up and now

997
00:46:42,000 --> 00:46:42,920
Speaker 5: I want a divorce.

998
00:46:43,040 --> 00:46:45,239
Speaker 3: It's exploding like a divorce volcano.

999
00:46:45,560 --> 00:46:48,440
Speaker 5: My husband and I had a difficult pregnancy that resulted

1000
00:46:48,480 --> 00:46:53,560
Speaker 5: in complications requiring a blood transfusion and emergency surgery. This

1001
00:46:53,719 --> 00:46:56,759
Speaker 5: left me with terrible PTSD and depression. We went on

1002
00:46:56,800 --> 00:46:58,800
Speaker 5: to have a healthy baby girl and then a healthy

1003
00:46:58,800 --> 00:47:02,759
Speaker 5: baby boy. After our second healthy baby, they said to

1004
00:47:02,840 --> 00:47:06,040
Speaker 5: not get pregnant again due to complications at birth and

1005
00:47:06,120 --> 00:47:09,759
Speaker 5: horrific kidney stones causing preterm labor. By the way, this

1006
00:47:09,800 --> 00:47:12,560
Speaker 5: comes from user work in MoMA five. If you want

1007
00:47:12,560 --> 00:47:14,400
Speaker 5: to submit your own stories, go to the r slash

1008
00:47:14,480 --> 00:47:18,240
Speaker 5: Okay Storytime subprettit. I'm Keon and I'm MANI and op says,

1009
00:47:18,400 --> 00:47:23,000
Speaker 5: long story short, my husband decides to not get a vasectomy,

1010
00:47:23,360 --> 00:47:27,719
Speaker 5: so I request surgery to remove my tubes. Well, I

1011
00:47:27,800 --> 00:47:30,799
Speaker 5: get pregnant while waiting for surgery, and he encouraged me

1012
00:47:30,920 --> 00:47:35,080
Speaker 5: to consider not continuing the pregnancy because of health concerns,

1013
00:47:35,520 --> 00:47:38,520
Speaker 5: but also because how we we ride disney rides as

1014
00:47:38,520 --> 00:47:41,839
Speaker 5: a family of five. We are not teenagers. We own

1015
00:47:41,920 --> 00:47:44,479
Speaker 5: a home, we have two healthy kids, and two well

1016
00:47:44,480 --> 00:47:48,960
Speaker 5: paying jobs. But this third pregnancy didn't fit our lifestyle plans.

1017
00:47:49,640 --> 00:47:52,719
Speaker 5: After much back and forth, he eventually became supportive of

1018
00:47:52,760 --> 00:47:57,600
Speaker 5: the baby go figure. My issue is how, as a

1019
00:47:57,680 --> 00:48:00,640
Speaker 5: husband and protector, do you watch your life go through

1020
00:48:00,719 --> 00:48:05,080
Speaker 5: difficult pregnancy complications, suffer through mental health impacts, and then

1021
00:48:05,160 --> 00:48:08,560
Speaker 5: initially not support her when she needs you most because

1022
00:48:08,600 --> 00:48:11,960
Speaker 5: you are too selfish to do a fifteen minute procedure.

1023
00:48:12,600 --> 00:48:16,320
Speaker 5: Fast forward, my water breaks six point five weeks early.

1024
00:48:16,719 --> 00:48:18,759
Speaker 5: I'm in the hospital trying to keep the baby in

1025
00:48:18,880 --> 00:48:20,640
Speaker 5: and I get a call that my sister tragically was

1026
00:48:20,719 --> 00:48:24,400
Speaker 5: unalived in a motorcycle accident. I truly can't make this

1027
00:48:24,480 --> 00:48:27,600
Speaker 5: stuff up. I am the only one in my family

1028
00:48:27,760 --> 00:48:30,160
Speaker 5: with the means to take care of things. So from

1029
00:48:30,160 --> 00:48:34,160
Speaker 5: the hospital bed, I arranged her cremation and ordered earns

1030
00:48:34,200 --> 00:48:37,400
Speaker 5: for my family and nieces. My husband thought this was

1031
00:48:37,920 --> 00:48:41,319
Speaker 5: not my responsibility and that I shouldn't be paying for it.

1032
00:48:41,960 --> 00:48:44,840
Speaker 5: Not how do I help you? Not give me the

1033
00:48:44,840 --> 00:48:50,160
Speaker 5: phone to call the funeral home, etc. The concern was money.

1034
00:48:50,400 --> 00:48:52,560
Speaker 5: Now the baby is here and my kids go to

1035
00:48:52,600 --> 00:48:55,520
Speaker 5: my mother in law's daycare, where safety has always been

1036
00:48:55,520 --> 00:48:58,160
Speaker 5: an issue. Blankets in the crib with my firstborn, taking

1037
00:48:58,200 --> 00:49:00,120
Speaker 5: my three month old to the beach without telling me,

1038
00:49:00,360 --> 00:49:04,000
Speaker 5: and forgetting her bottle. The list goes on and on.

1039
00:49:04,880 --> 00:49:07,920
Speaker 5: The most major and recent incident was with my PREMI

1040
00:49:08,160 --> 00:49:11,239
Speaker 5: at nine months old, seven months adjusted. They brought him

1041
00:49:11,280 --> 00:49:13,760
Speaker 5: upstairs so that he wasn't left downstairs with the toddlers

1042
00:49:13,800 --> 00:49:17,600
Speaker 5: while the daycare worker went to the bathroom, yes, leaving

1043
00:49:17,600 --> 00:49:21,920
Speaker 5: a bunch of kids with zero eyes on them forgetting

1044
00:49:21,920 --> 00:49:24,279
Speaker 5: that he started to crawl, She shut the bathroom door

1045
00:49:24,520 --> 00:49:27,680
Speaker 5: and he fell all the way down the basement stairs

1046
00:49:28,040 --> 00:49:31,200
Speaker 5: and smacked his face on a printer. They did not

1047
00:49:31,239 --> 00:49:34,560
Speaker 5: call nine to one one or anything. They tried to

1048
00:49:34,560 --> 00:49:36,680
Speaker 5: play it off like he just slid down on his belly.

1049
00:49:37,160 --> 00:49:39,560
Speaker 5: Because I had to take him to the hospital for evaluation.

1050
00:49:40,239 --> 00:49:42,640
Speaker 5: A report was filed with the state. It then came

1051
00:49:42,680 --> 00:49:44,799
Speaker 5: to light that my mother in law lied, and they

1052
00:49:44,840 --> 00:49:47,360
Speaker 5: called me, saying that it was a family matter and

1053
00:49:47,400 --> 00:49:51,520
Speaker 5: accused me of false reporting. She claimed there were no injuries,

1054
00:49:51,719 --> 00:49:55,040
Speaker 5: but the hospital took pictures and I had them too.

1055
00:49:55,160 --> 00:49:57,320
Speaker 5: I pulled my little list from my mother in law's daycare,

1056
00:49:57,680 --> 00:49:59,920
Speaker 5: but had to keep my middle child there because of

1057
00:50:00,000 --> 00:50:03,880
Speaker 5: passive aggressiveness from my husband related to the cost of

1058
00:50:03,960 --> 00:50:08,200
Speaker 5: the other daycare. Once my littlest scott bigger, we put

1059
00:50:08,280 --> 00:50:10,440
Speaker 5: him back at my mother in law's home daycare, against

1060
00:50:10,480 --> 00:50:13,719
Speaker 5: my better judgment, but with hope to fix my marriage.

1061
00:50:14,080 --> 00:50:16,799
Speaker 5: Stupid in hindsight. O very year later, and she is

1062
00:50:16,840 --> 00:50:19,840
Speaker 5: still putting my kids in danger. I walked into the

1063
00:50:19,840 --> 00:50:22,040
Speaker 5: backyard and my two year old is up on the

1064
00:50:22,040 --> 00:50:25,760
Speaker 5: platform part of the playground. There are huge drops all around,

1065
00:50:25,800 --> 00:50:28,040
Speaker 5: and my mother in law was on her deck, way

1066
00:50:28,080 --> 00:50:30,800
Speaker 5: too far to intervene if an accident was gonna happen.

1067
00:50:31,200 --> 00:50:33,359
Speaker 5: My two year old also bid a baby badly because

1068
00:50:33,360 --> 00:50:35,560
Speaker 5: they are left downstairs alone with my mother in law

1069
00:50:35,800 --> 00:50:39,560
Speaker 5: when she's making meals. They have cameras, but she never

1070
00:50:39,920 --> 00:50:42,400
Speaker 5: watches them. My husband never stands up for my kids' safety.

1071
00:50:42,920 --> 00:50:45,360
Speaker 5: Even with a marriage counselor telling him they need to

1072
00:50:45,400 --> 00:50:48,799
Speaker 5: be moved, no actual action has been taken to do so.

1073
00:50:49,760 --> 00:50:52,960
Speaker 5: On top of that, up until I said divorce, my

1074
00:50:53,080 --> 00:50:54,920
Speaker 5: husband was not helping me the way I want my

1075
00:50:54,960 --> 00:50:57,520
Speaker 5: husband to help me. I have to remember to order

1076
00:50:57,560 --> 00:51:00,359
Speaker 5: the home heating fuel, buy the salt for our water

1077
00:51:00,400 --> 00:51:04,640
Speaker 5: softener system, and lug the forty pound bags in without

1078
00:51:04,680 --> 00:51:07,480
Speaker 5: his help. I take care of my vehicle and have

1079
00:51:07,560 --> 00:51:09,759
Speaker 5: to urge him to take care of his. He will

1080
00:51:09,800 --> 00:51:11,319
Speaker 5: do it if I ask him to do it, but

1081
00:51:11,600 --> 00:51:14,680
Speaker 5: I am tired. I want to be taken care of

1082
00:51:14,920 --> 00:51:18,319
Speaker 5: and for my kids to be protected. I have an

1083
00:51:18,360 --> 00:51:21,320
Speaker 5: appointment with a lawyer on Monday. I have no clue

1084
00:51:21,320 --> 00:51:25,200
Speaker 5: how to feel. This is a horrible, horrible experience. After

1085
00:51:25,239 --> 00:51:28,640
Speaker 5: a decade of being the husband I am contemplating a divorce.

1086
00:51:29,120 --> 00:51:31,360
Speaker 5: There's a whole long list of issues within our marriage,

1087
00:51:31,600 --> 00:51:34,640
Speaker 5: but these are the major events that continue to snowball.

1088
00:51:35,600 --> 00:51:38,480
Speaker 5: I am the breadwinner two times over, I have everyone

1089
00:51:38,520 --> 00:51:40,840
Speaker 5: on my health insurance, and I work a mentally demanding

1090
00:51:40,880 --> 00:51:43,640
Speaker 5: full time job. I want to say my husband is

1091
00:51:43,680 --> 00:51:47,359
Speaker 5: a good person and a wonderful father, but I do

1092
00:51:47,480 --> 00:51:49,040
Speaker 5: not think he is the husband I want to be

1093
00:51:49,160 --> 00:51:52,520
Speaker 5: married to for the rest of my life. Any advice

1094
00:51:52,560 --> 00:51:55,280
Speaker 5: would be appreciated. And we have some comments Angie.

1095
00:51:54,840 --> 00:52:01,960
Speaker 4: Holy crap, dude, divorce volcano for sure. Man, it is

1096
00:52:02,080 --> 00:52:07,560
Speaker 4: it is. It is booming off. There's lava running straight

1097
00:52:07,719 --> 00:52:08,640
Speaker 4: chasing after.

1098
00:52:08,400 --> 00:52:10,720
Speaker 5: The Pompeii is right there.

1099
00:52:10,920 --> 00:52:11,840
Speaker 3: Yeah, oh.

1100
00:52:13,600 --> 00:52:16,400
Speaker 4: Yes, get out of there. And I'm so glad that

1101
00:52:16,440 --> 00:52:18,600
Speaker 4: she is so glad that she's going to a lawyer.

1102
00:52:18,600 --> 00:52:22,920
Speaker 4: This stuff is insane, so so insane that he's not

1103
00:52:23,160 --> 00:52:27,160
Speaker 4: caring about the safety of their children nine months old

1104
00:52:27,200 --> 00:52:31,040
Speaker 4: and falling down an entire staircase and just head on

1105
00:52:31,080 --> 00:52:31,600
Speaker 4: his printer.

1106
00:52:31,880 --> 00:52:34,400
Speaker 5: The fact that he's so nonchalant about his mother in

1107
00:52:34,480 --> 00:52:36,759
Speaker 5: law's daycare. This doesn't sound like a dacer. By the way,

1108
00:52:36,760 --> 00:52:38,839
Speaker 5: this sounds like just like like a like I don't

1109
00:52:38,880 --> 00:52:39,319
Speaker 5: even know.

1110
00:52:39,880 --> 00:52:41,120
Speaker 3: It sounds like a haunted house.

1111
00:52:41,280 --> 00:52:43,400
Speaker 4: Like it sounds like a haunted house version of a

1112
00:52:43,480 --> 00:52:45,759
Speaker 4: daycare where you would walk through and there's like there's

1113
00:52:45,800 --> 00:52:49,200
Speaker 4: things swinging from the walls and there's like things drop

1114
00:52:49,239 --> 00:52:51,640
Speaker 4: in there's creaky staircases.

1115
00:52:51,920 --> 00:52:55,560
Speaker 5: It's like a Ninja Warrior course for babies. Literally, what

1116
00:52:55,880 --> 00:52:59,440
Speaker 5: like this is not fair? This is terrible. We have

1117
00:52:59,520 --> 00:53:04,120
Speaker 5: some comment comment number one obviously not the a hole. Honestly,

1118
00:53:04,160 --> 00:53:06,360
Speaker 5: it sounds like you've been carrying way too much on

1119
00:53:06,400 --> 00:53:10,160
Speaker 5: your own for years. Your husband not stepping up and

1120
00:53:10,360 --> 00:53:12,640
Speaker 5: letting your letting your mother in law put your kids

1121
00:53:12,640 --> 00:53:16,919
Speaker 5: in danger is serious. Wanting a partner who actually helps

1122
00:53:16,960 --> 00:53:20,560
Speaker 5: and protect your family is totally reasonable. Seeing a lawyer

1123
00:53:20,600 --> 00:53:23,600
Speaker 5: and making plans for your safety and your kids is

1124
00:53:23,640 --> 00:53:26,800
Speaker 5: the right move. We have a reply. This post is

1125
00:53:26,920 --> 00:53:31,319
Speaker 5: essentially showcasing that you have bad decision making skills. You

1126
00:53:31,520 --> 00:53:34,879
Speaker 5: know how children are made. Oops, I did it again

1127
00:53:34,920 --> 00:53:38,720
Speaker 5: with pregnancy should be reserved for teenagers, not adult married couples.

1128
00:53:39,239 --> 00:53:41,520
Speaker 5: You insisted on having a third child with a man

1129
00:53:41,760 --> 00:53:45,360
Speaker 5: who hasn't always been a good partner slash husband or

1130
00:53:45,400 --> 00:53:48,040
Speaker 5: a good father, yet you keep verring to him for

1131
00:53:48,120 --> 00:53:51,280
Speaker 5: important choices that literally put your kids in danger. None

1132
00:53:51,280 --> 00:53:53,200
Speaker 5: of your children had to go to the mother in

1133
00:53:53,280 --> 00:53:56,160
Speaker 5: law's daycare. If you claim you have a good paying job,

1134
00:53:56,360 --> 00:53:58,680
Speaker 5: then find a daycare that doesn't put their lives in danger.

1135
00:53:58,760 --> 00:54:01,640
Speaker 5: Regardless of what your husband says or how your mother

1136
00:54:01,640 --> 00:54:05,120
Speaker 5: in law feels about it, you keep blaming him while

1137
00:54:05,120 --> 00:54:08,719
Speaker 5: you're equally responsible for your children's well being. Now you're

1138
00:54:08,719 --> 00:54:12,120
Speaker 5: crowdsourcing internet stranger's input on whether to get a divorce

1139
00:54:12,200 --> 00:54:15,239
Speaker 5: or not. Sort this out with your therapist. Come number two,

1140
00:54:15,360 --> 00:54:17,480
Speaker 5: You've got a lot going on, and I feel bad

1141
00:54:17,520 --> 00:54:19,799
Speaker 5: saying this, but if you haven't removed your children from

1142
00:54:19,840 --> 00:54:22,960
Speaker 5: a dangerous situation, you are contributing to it, even if

1143
00:54:22,960 --> 00:54:25,040
Speaker 5: it is your mother in law's daycare and your husband

1144
00:54:25,120 --> 00:54:28,319
Speaker 5: is pushing that you use it. My read on your

1145
00:54:28,360 --> 00:54:31,080
Speaker 5: post is that everything just keeps moving, so you are

1146
00:54:31,120 --> 00:54:34,040
Speaker 5: allowing things to happen to you, but those things have

1147
00:54:34,120 --> 00:54:38,720
Speaker 5: major implications on your life and more significantly, your children's lives.

1148
00:54:39,440 --> 00:54:41,440
Speaker 5: You might want to take some time to find a

1149
00:54:41,440 --> 00:54:45,200
Speaker 5: new situation for your kids so they are safe and

1150
00:54:45,400 --> 00:54:48,359
Speaker 5: comm At number three, why aren't you reporting your mother

1151
00:54:48,400 --> 00:54:51,960
Speaker 5: in law's illegal daycare to the state. There are standards

1152
00:54:51,960 --> 00:54:55,440
Speaker 5: for these facilities. What happens when she seriously injures or

1153
00:54:56,600 --> 00:55:00,640
Speaker 5: hopefully not but on a live as a child replies,

1154
00:55:01,360 --> 00:55:05,799
Speaker 5: Oh she has been and she was getting shut down constantly.

1155
00:55:05,920 --> 00:55:09,200
Speaker 5: Oh until the state just licensed her again. It's so sad.

1156
00:55:09,440 --> 00:55:12,479
Speaker 5: It's a corrupt system. And there's a reply, but you're

1157
00:55:12,560 --> 00:55:14,239
Speaker 5: still sending your children there.

1158
00:55:14,400 --> 00:55:17,839
Speaker 4: Yeah, that's hard. That's hard, because that is true. She

1159
00:55:17,920 --> 00:55:21,080
Speaker 4: should I think I think it's good to bring that

1160
00:55:21,160 --> 00:55:24,680
Speaker 4: stuff up in you know, not a like oh for shame,

1161
00:55:24,840 --> 00:55:26,920
Speaker 4: you are doing this to your children, but in a

1162
00:55:26,920 --> 00:55:29,239
Speaker 4: way of like you can do something, like you have

1163
00:55:29,360 --> 00:55:30,120
Speaker 4: power here, you.

1164
00:55:30,080 --> 00:55:31,560
Speaker 5: Do have power. I want you to know that you

1165
00:55:31,600 --> 00:55:34,279
Speaker 5: have the you have the free will. You don't need

1166
00:55:34,320 --> 00:55:37,400
Speaker 5: your husband's Okay, you don't need anyone else's like. You

1167
00:55:37,440 --> 00:55:40,880
Speaker 5: can do that, you are allowed to like no exactly

1168
00:55:41,080 --> 00:55:43,040
Speaker 5: coming number four, Can you explain to us why you

1169
00:55:43,080 --> 00:55:45,160
Speaker 5: think you might be an a hole? Do you think

1170
00:55:45,200 --> 00:55:47,759
Speaker 5: that divorce is never justified? Do you think that you

1171
00:55:47,840 --> 00:55:52,719
Speaker 5: don't have a good enough case? Opie says yes, all

1172
00:55:52,760 --> 00:55:55,160
Speaker 5: of the above, because he is a good dad. I

1173
00:55:55,239 --> 00:55:58,000
Speaker 5: haven't seen that he does love me and wants to

1174
00:55:58,040 --> 00:56:02,240
Speaker 5: make it work. I'm I'm feeling our picture perfect family

1175
00:56:02,640 --> 00:56:05,799
Speaker 5: is going to be ruined by me. It would be

1176
00:56:05,840 --> 00:56:08,920
Speaker 5: easier if he was some ahle who verbally mistreated me.

1177
00:56:09,520 --> 00:56:12,799
Speaker 5: He's very passive and will cry. On the other hand,

1178
00:56:12,920 --> 00:56:16,160
Speaker 5: I give and give, and I never feel taken care of.

1179
00:56:16,520 --> 00:56:18,400
Speaker 5: He never stands up for me. I did a fitness

1180
00:56:18,400 --> 00:56:20,719
Speaker 5: competition and I was accused of making his sister fall

1181
00:56:20,760 --> 00:56:23,760
Speaker 5: deeper into her eating disorder. They said this to my face,

1182
00:56:23,840 --> 00:56:26,839
Speaker 5: and my husband said nothing in my defense. Oh there's

1183
00:56:26,840 --> 00:56:29,920
Speaker 5: a reply. If he's a good dad, why is he

1184
00:56:30,000 --> 00:56:32,799
Speaker 5: insisting on putting his kids in danger by going to

1185
00:56:32,840 --> 00:56:36,960
Speaker 5: an unsafe daycare? Op? Good point. It's his mom, So

1186
00:56:37,040 --> 00:56:38,960
Speaker 5: I guess he just feels it's the best option and

1187
00:56:39,040 --> 00:56:40,480
Speaker 5: does not like confrontation.

1188
00:56:40,719 --> 00:56:42,240
Speaker 2: Oh op op.

1189
00:56:42,680 --> 00:56:45,960
Speaker 4: This is a classic case of like, oh, well, here's

1190
00:56:46,200 --> 00:56:48,640
Speaker 4: all these insane, terrible things, but.

1191
00:56:48,600 --> 00:56:51,799
Speaker 5: Like I'm gonna keep defending it, like he's not that bad, Like.

1192
00:56:51,760 --> 00:56:52,600
Speaker 3: That could be worse.

1193
00:56:52,880 --> 00:56:55,680
Speaker 4: But that's the thing is that it can always be worse,

1194
00:56:56,000 --> 00:56:57,160
Speaker 4: always be worse, but.

1195
00:56:57,080 --> 00:56:59,160
Speaker 5: It could be so much better too.

1196
00:57:00,000 --> 00:57:02,800
Speaker 4: Oh boy, Still have to realize what he is doing,

1197
00:57:03,760 --> 00:57:07,439
Speaker 4: and you have to really think about it with your

1198
00:57:07,640 --> 00:57:10,279
Speaker 4: head instead of your heart. And you have you know,

1199
00:57:10,320 --> 00:57:13,200
Speaker 4: you have all of your emotional thoughts coming to you

1200
00:57:13,280 --> 00:57:14,840
Speaker 4: trying to make a decision that way. But then you

1201
00:57:15,239 --> 00:57:18,080
Speaker 4: have you have your logical thoughts. I know you do, ohpie,

1202
00:57:18,480 --> 00:57:21,800
Speaker 4: And you know that that's telling you to divorce.

1203
00:57:21,880 --> 00:57:25,480
Speaker 5: The fact that you're like enabling or not necessarily enabling,

1204
00:57:25,480 --> 00:57:27,640
Speaker 5: but defending, Like oh, he is a good dad, he

1205
00:57:27,800 --> 00:57:31,120
Speaker 5: is a good husband, and like we haven't gotten a

1206
00:57:31,160 --> 00:57:34,919
Speaker 5: single itty bitty ounce of that in the story. Yeah,

1207
00:57:34,920 --> 00:57:39,800
Speaker 5: from what we've got, he is maybe a fine father,

1208
00:57:40,160 --> 00:57:43,520
Speaker 5: but a terrible husband. Like he's never putting you first.

1209
00:57:43,600 --> 00:57:46,120
Speaker 4: But the fact that he you literally said that he

1210
00:57:46,280 --> 00:57:50,600
Speaker 4: is not, like he doesn't have that much importance for

1211
00:57:50,640 --> 00:57:51,920
Speaker 4: his children's safety.

1212
00:57:52,040 --> 00:57:53,919
Speaker 5: Yeah, I take that back. Yeah, he's not a fine father.

1213
00:57:54,080 --> 00:57:57,200
Speaker 5: He's a terrible father. He keeps like insisting you should,

1214
00:57:57,200 --> 00:57:59,120
Speaker 5: oh send the kids to the worst place that we

1215
00:57:59,160 --> 00:57:59,720
Speaker 5: could send them to.

1216
00:58:00,000 --> 00:58:06,120
Speaker 4: Exactly because like any any any bad person, anyone who's

1217
00:58:06,200 --> 00:58:10,600
Speaker 4: bad and like has done bad things, will have like

1218
00:58:10,960 --> 00:58:14,640
Speaker 4: good parts of them, whether it's teeny tiny or or

1219
00:58:15,040 --> 00:58:18,080
Speaker 4: you know, they have their big nice moments, or he

1220
00:58:18,200 --> 00:58:21,080
Speaker 4: seems like he cries and he's vulnerable. That's that's because

1221
00:58:21,080 --> 00:58:24,080
Speaker 4: he's human. That's not because he's actually a good person

1222
00:58:24,120 --> 00:58:26,800
Speaker 4: and you're not seeing it. So you have to really

1223
00:58:27,040 --> 00:58:30,280
Speaker 4: like ignore all of the good things because everyone, you

1224
00:58:30,320 --> 00:58:33,640
Speaker 4: can find the good in everyone. Okay, again, whether it's

1225
00:58:33,720 --> 00:58:34,440
Speaker 4: whether it's small or.

1226
00:58:34,440 --> 00:58:37,760
Speaker 5: Not, that doesn't that doesn't outshine all the negative things.

1227
00:58:37,920 --> 00:58:38,240
Speaker 2: Exactly.

1228
00:58:38,240 --> 00:58:39,920
Speaker 4: We said, it's just not worth it.

1229
00:58:40,040 --> 00:58:42,919
Speaker 5: Yeah. Like if you say like all the negative things,

1230
00:58:42,960 --> 00:58:45,320
Speaker 5: you're like, all right, does all this and then he

1231
00:58:45,360 --> 00:58:48,640
Speaker 5: goes like he's got a good quality. You know he

1232
00:58:48,680 --> 00:58:51,960
Speaker 5: could be worse. It's like, no, stop defending it. We

1233
00:58:52,000 --> 00:58:53,840
Speaker 5: do have an update. I'll be making calls today to

1234
00:58:53,920 --> 00:58:56,680
Speaker 5: move my kids, and I have an appointment already scheduled

1235
00:58:56,680 --> 00:59:00,520
Speaker 5: with the lawyer for Monday. It is hard, it's uncomfort.

1236
00:59:00,720 --> 00:59:02,640
Speaker 5: I know this will be a lonely time for me.

1237
00:59:03,120 --> 00:59:05,320
Speaker 5: But like many of you said, and like I know

1238
00:59:05,440 --> 00:59:08,600
Speaker 5: truly in my heart, the safety of my children comes first,

1239
00:59:08,760 --> 00:59:12,880
Speaker 5: and everybody else can f off. We do deserve better,

1240
00:59:13,280 --> 00:59:15,440
Speaker 5: and I know I cannot be happy in this marriage.

1241
00:59:15,440 --> 00:59:16,960
Speaker 5: There is a second update. I'm going to go straight

1242
00:59:17,000 --> 00:59:20,320
Speaker 5: into it. Update two. The Universe provided and the daycare

1243
00:59:20,400 --> 00:59:24,000
Speaker 5: my son went to temporarily had two spots open last day.

1244
00:59:24,080 --> 00:59:27,240
Speaker 5: Mother in law's daycare is today. I feel so much

1245
00:59:27,280 --> 00:59:29,800
Speaker 5: weight off my shoulders, knowing my kids will be safe.

1246
00:59:30,360 --> 00:59:33,360
Speaker 5: Called my husband and said this is happening, and I

1247
00:59:33,440 --> 00:59:36,760
Speaker 5: don't give a f whose feelings are hurt. I'm going

1248
00:59:36,800 --> 00:59:38,960
Speaker 5: to step up and take care of my kids. They

1249
00:59:39,000 --> 00:59:41,840
Speaker 5: are number one and I should have never waited this long.

1250
00:59:42,040 --> 00:59:44,960
Speaker 5: There we go okay, okay, well okay.

1251
00:59:45,160 --> 00:59:48,040
Speaker 4: I wish we had his reaction, and I wish we

1252
00:59:48,120 --> 00:59:52,959
Speaker 4: had info on the lawyer meeting. But I am very

1253
00:59:53,000 --> 00:59:55,160
Speaker 4: happy with you saying those things.

1254
00:59:55,400 --> 00:59:56,080
Speaker 2: Hey, it's John here.

1255
00:59:56,120 --> 00:59:57,840
Speaker 1: We're gonna get back to this episode, but a quick

1256
00:59:57,840 --> 00:59:59,680
Speaker 1: three minute break with aswermre sponsors.

1257
01:00:00,280 --> 01:00:03,880
Speaker 4: I joked about my daughter's appearance, and my wife took

1258
01:00:03,920 --> 01:00:04,920
Speaker 4: it out of context.

1259
01:00:05,040 --> 01:00:05,880
Speaker 5: Why are we doing that?

1260
01:00:05,960 --> 01:00:09,360
Speaker 4: Idol sounds bad, but hear me out. My thirty seven

1261
01:00:09,440 --> 01:00:12,320
Speaker 4: male wife thirty eight female, and I have a nine

1262
01:00:12,360 --> 01:00:14,640
Speaker 4: year old daughter, and my wife is also seven months

1263
01:00:14,680 --> 01:00:17,280
Speaker 4: pregnant with our son. When our daughter was younger, she

1264
01:00:17,320 --> 01:00:19,520
Speaker 4: looked a lot like me, but as she aged, she

1265
01:00:19,640 --> 01:00:22,000
Speaker 4: started to look more and more like her mom. Please

1266
01:00:22,040 --> 01:00:25,040
Speaker 4: note that I have very manly features. By the way,

1267
01:00:25,200 --> 01:00:27,320
Speaker 4: this comes from idiot dad ta And if you want

1268
01:00:27,320 --> 01:00:29,320
Speaker 4: to submit your own stories, go to the hour slash. Okay,

1269
01:00:29,320 --> 01:00:30,480
Speaker 4: story time separated and.

1270
01:00:30,440 --> 01:00:31,760
Speaker 5: I'm Angie and I'm Keon.

1271
01:00:31,920 --> 01:00:34,480
Speaker 4: And Opie says, I was having an adult soda with

1272
01:00:34,480 --> 01:00:36,560
Speaker 4: my brother in law and my backyard while our daughters

1273
01:00:36,600 --> 01:00:39,360
Speaker 4: played inside the house. We were getting a bit tipsy.

1274
01:00:39,520 --> 01:00:42,040
Speaker 4: It's fine since his wife could drive. We got to

1275
01:00:42,120 --> 01:00:44,320
Speaker 4: talking about kids and how I wanted my son to

1276
01:00:44,360 --> 01:00:46,520
Speaker 4: take after me. He brought up the fact that our

1277
01:00:46,640 --> 01:00:49,120
Speaker 4: daughter started out like my clone, and I said, yeah,

1278
01:00:49,160 --> 01:00:51,680
Speaker 4: thank god, she's slowly starting to look more and more

1279
01:00:51,800 --> 01:00:55,400
Speaker 4: like her mom. Can you imagine this? I pointed my

1280
01:00:55,800 --> 01:01:00,240
Speaker 4: face on a teenage girl, her life would suck, and well, well,

1281
01:01:00,480 --> 01:01:04,000
Speaker 4: my wife was within earshot because she was bringing us food.

1282
01:01:04,440 --> 01:01:06,440
Speaker 4: She dumped it in front of us and called me

1283
01:01:06,480 --> 01:01:09,720
Speaker 4: an ale for saying our daughter is ugly. She walked

1284
01:01:09,760 --> 01:01:12,440
Speaker 4: back to the house crying, and when I chased after her,

1285
01:01:12,520 --> 01:01:14,960
Speaker 4: she told me to stay away. Brother in law and

1286
01:01:15,000 --> 01:01:17,240
Speaker 4: sister in law left shortly after, and I did all

1287
01:01:17,280 --> 01:01:19,360
Speaker 4: the clean up myself and put my daughter to bed.

1288
01:01:19,840 --> 01:01:22,360
Speaker 4: I wasn't super wasted, just a bit tipsy. When I

1289
01:01:22,400 --> 01:01:24,200
Speaker 4: went to sleep, my wife was still awake and she

1290
01:01:24,280 --> 01:01:26,960
Speaker 4: pretty much exiled me to the couch because apparently I

1291
01:01:27,040 --> 01:01:30,160
Speaker 4: think our daughter is ugly. I tried to apologize for that,

1292
01:01:30,200 --> 01:01:32,840
Speaker 4: but she wasn't having it. She's pregnant, so I didn't

1293
01:01:32,840 --> 01:01:35,680
Speaker 4: want to stress her out. I spent an uncomfortable night

1294
01:01:35,720 --> 01:01:39,280
Speaker 4: on the couch and now my back hurts. Heck, my

1295
01:01:39,360 --> 01:01:41,600
Speaker 4: wife and daughter are still asleep. So I'm typing this.

1296
01:01:41,880 --> 01:01:43,880
Speaker 4: I don't think I did anything wrong, But am I

1297
01:01:43,920 --> 01:01:46,240
Speaker 4: the a hole? Is this her hormones? Or am I

1298
01:01:46,280 --> 01:01:49,120
Speaker 4: really callous for saying something like that? And there's an

1299
01:01:49,240 --> 01:01:52,960
Speaker 4: edit just to clarify. No food was wasted by dumping

1300
01:01:52,960 --> 01:01:55,240
Speaker 4: it in front of us. I meant she angrily put

1301
01:01:55,240 --> 01:01:57,320
Speaker 4: it on the table and stormed off. She's not a monster.

1302
01:01:57,480 --> 01:02:01,560
Speaker 4: And there are some comments, but yeah, what do you think?

1303
01:02:01,600 --> 01:02:02,439
Speaker 4: Do you think he's a whole?

1304
01:02:03,120 --> 01:02:06,320
Speaker 5: Not necessarily no, Like I think it was like a

1305
01:02:06,440 --> 01:02:10,280
Speaker 5: lighthearted joke, believing's like, could you imagine someone with this face?

1306
01:02:10,760 --> 01:02:10,960
Speaker 3: Right?

1307
01:02:11,240 --> 01:02:12,320
Speaker 5: I come on, I.

1308
01:02:12,280 --> 01:02:15,880
Speaker 4: Feel like he What was really happening was he was

1309
01:02:15,920 --> 01:02:18,760
Speaker 4: saying that her. He was saying that his wife is beautiful,

1310
01:02:18,760 --> 01:02:20,080
Speaker 4: and he was calling himself ugly.

1311
01:02:20,280 --> 01:02:23,480
Speaker 5: Yeah, he literally he was like, well, well, at least

1312
01:02:23,520 --> 01:02:26,920
Speaker 5: our daughter is gonna look more like mom, because she's beautiful,

1313
01:02:26,920 --> 01:02:30,440
Speaker 5: and like, yeah, imagine someone with like this beard, like

1314
01:02:30,440 --> 01:02:31,800
Speaker 5: like that strong jaw.

1315
01:02:32,120 --> 01:02:33,560
Speaker 4: Yeah yeah, like.

1316
01:02:33,960 --> 01:02:36,280
Speaker 5: But maybe it could be again the context of like,

1317
01:02:36,520 --> 01:02:41,160
Speaker 5: oh maybe again, she is pregnant, right, and seven months pregnant,

1318
01:02:41,240 --> 01:02:44,240
Speaker 5: so that could be definitely with the hormones and everything.

1319
01:02:44,360 --> 01:02:44,920
Speaker 4: But yeah, she.

1320
01:02:44,880 --> 01:02:47,440
Speaker 5: Probably said maybe because you're calling yourself ugly. I don't know,

1321
01:02:47,480 --> 01:02:49,320
Speaker 5: I feel like a conversation. Well you tried to have

1322
01:02:49,360 --> 01:02:52,320
Speaker 5: a conversation, but see why she was like so taken

1323
01:02:52,360 --> 01:02:56,080
Speaker 5: far back because you gotta be like, I don't I'm

1324
01:02:56,080 --> 01:02:58,200
Speaker 5: not calling her. I was making fun of myself.

1325
01:02:58,320 --> 01:03:01,920
Speaker 4: But let's see how this goes. Opie has some comments

1326
01:03:01,920 --> 01:03:05,440
Speaker 4: replying to other commenters. To a deleted commenter, I actually

1327
01:03:05,480 --> 01:03:07,240
Speaker 4: like how I look, which is why I would love

1328
01:03:07,280 --> 01:03:09,080
Speaker 4: for my son to look like me. It's just that

1329
01:03:09,200 --> 01:03:11,680
Speaker 4: my features aren't really ideal for a girl. Thanks for

1330
01:03:11,720 --> 01:03:14,200
Speaker 4: your insight, though, I'll keep that in mind. Another commentary says,

1331
01:03:14,280 --> 01:03:16,120
Speaker 4: not the A hole, but you really shouldn't comment on

1332
01:03:16,160 --> 01:03:18,920
Speaker 4: your daughter's attractiveness for the next ten years or so.

1333
01:03:19,120 --> 01:03:22,640
Speaker 4: You think your pregnant wife is hormonal and getting overly emotional,

1334
01:03:23,040 --> 01:03:24,880
Speaker 4: how do you think your daughter is going to be

1335
01:03:24,960 --> 01:03:27,440
Speaker 4: in three to four years. At nine, it's probably not

1336
01:03:27,520 --> 01:03:29,680
Speaker 4: a big deal, but at twelve if she overheard you,

1337
01:03:29,960 --> 01:03:32,120
Speaker 4: she could fixate on it for a long time. Just

1338
01:03:32,240 --> 01:03:34,960
Speaker 4: keep that in mind for your future. And you're not

1339
01:03:34,960 --> 01:03:37,160
Speaker 4: the A hole, but apologize to your wife. She's hormonal

1340
01:03:37,200 --> 01:03:39,680
Speaker 4: and overreacting, but this is not the hill. You want

1341
01:03:39,720 --> 01:03:43,000
Speaker 4: to pass away on an OPI responds, and this response

1342
01:03:43,080 --> 01:03:45,520
Speaker 4: is down voted. Oh yeah, I'm more than willing to

1343
01:03:45,520 --> 01:03:48,120
Speaker 4: swallow my pride in the scenario. Being wrong while being

1344
01:03:48,200 --> 01:03:50,520
Speaker 4: able to sleep on a bed and have spicy sleep

1345
01:03:50,520 --> 01:03:52,560
Speaker 4: with my wife is so much better than being right

1346
01:03:52,600 --> 01:03:55,400
Speaker 4: and sleeping on the couch. Ho Opie is overall voted

1347
01:03:55,440 --> 01:03:57,920
Speaker 4: not the a hole, but the responses were mixed. But

1348
01:03:58,040 --> 01:04:00,400
Speaker 4: we do have an update. Okay, I just want to

1349
01:04:00,400 --> 01:04:03,240
Speaker 4: clarify a few things. I have no self confidence issues

1350
01:04:03,320 --> 01:04:05,840
Speaker 4: or anything. I think my looks are well above average

1351
01:04:05,840 --> 01:04:08,040
Speaker 4: for a guy, but I have really hard features and

1352
01:04:08,160 --> 01:04:11,000
Speaker 4: a resting, angry face, so it wouldn't really look very

1353
01:04:11,000 --> 01:04:13,840
Speaker 4: good on a girl. Trust me, I know my sister

1354
01:04:13,960 --> 01:04:14,600
Speaker 4: looks like me.

1355
01:04:15,960 --> 01:04:19,160
Speaker 3: My, thatad's funny. That's funny.

1356
01:04:19,160 --> 01:04:22,000
Speaker 5: It's mean, but don't say that to your sister.

1357
01:04:22,240 --> 01:04:24,640
Speaker 4: But that's a really funny way to put that. Yeah,

1358
01:04:25,240 --> 01:04:27,880
Speaker 4: my daughter has grown to resemble my wife a lot

1359
01:04:27,880 --> 01:04:31,320
Speaker 4: more than me, with my wife's softer features, except she

1360
01:04:31,440 --> 01:04:34,880
Speaker 4: has a resting witch face, which hopefully scares off the boys.

1361
01:04:35,120 --> 01:04:37,880
Speaker 4: Just kidding. I know every dad says it, but my

1362
01:04:38,000 --> 01:04:41,200
Speaker 4: daughter is beautiful. Also, this is the first time my

1363
01:04:41,240 --> 01:04:43,520
Speaker 4: wife has actually punched me out of bed after being

1364
01:04:43,600 --> 01:04:46,360
Speaker 4: together for a decade. It's unlike her, so this was

1365
01:04:46,440 --> 01:04:49,800
Speaker 4: definitely a one time thing. Also, what's the issue some

1366
01:04:49,800 --> 01:04:52,240
Speaker 4: people have with my wife serving me food. We have

1367
01:04:52,280 --> 01:04:54,960
Speaker 4: a very healthy relationship. I take care of her, she

1368
01:04:55,080 --> 01:04:57,240
Speaker 4: takes care she takes care of me. Isn't that how

1369
01:04:57,280 --> 01:05:00,360
Speaker 4: it's supposed to go. Don't sell me on the whole

1370
01:05:00,400 --> 01:05:03,520
Speaker 4: power dynamic crab. That ain't for me, So onto the

1371
01:05:03,520 --> 01:05:05,600
Speaker 4: real update. Yeah, I'm guessing some people were like, oh,

1372
01:05:05,680 --> 01:05:08,880
Speaker 4: you were having bringing you your food?

1373
01:05:09,040 --> 01:05:09,280
Speaker 2: Yeah.

1374
01:05:09,360 --> 01:05:12,560
Speaker 5: I literally pictured to like, you're out with your like

1375
01:05:12,920 --> 01:05:15,120
Speaker 5: in laws, your brother and sister in law, what have you.

1376
01:05:15,360 --> 01:05:19,040
Speaker 4: Yeah, and she made it happened to make something late. Yeah,

1377
01:05:18,680 --> 01:05:21,640
Speaker 4: I wouldn't jump to the idea that he wouldn't do

1378
01:05:21,680 --> 01:05:22,160
Speaker 4: the same for her.

1379
01:05:22,280 --> 01:05:24,320
Speaker 5: Yeah, exactly. I wasn't jumping into that, but we are

1380
01:05:24,480 --> 01:05:26,880
Speaker 5: jumping to maybe you should think before you say a

1381
01:05:26,920 --> 01:05:29,160
Speaker 5: couple of times like you said it that you literally

1382
01:05:29,160 --> 01:05:32,360
Speaker 5: typed it out like my sister has rough looks. She

1383
01:05:32,480 --> 01:05:33,800
Speaker 5: was exactly, that's hilarious.

1384
01:05:34,040 --> 01:05:36,200
Speaker 4: Yeah, I feel like if they have that, you know,

1385
01:05:36,440 --> 01:05:39,320
Speaker 4: bantering like brother sister, Yeah, dynamic, that's.

1386
01:05:39,320 --> 01:05:41,520
Speaker 5: Yeah, it's it's just like you got to know your crowd,

1387
01:05:41,520 --> 01:05:43,360
Speaker 5: which is kind of weird because again, this is your wife,

1388
01:05:43,400 --> 01:05:46,480
Speaker 5: and you probably made similar jokes like this about yourself

1389
01:05:46,720 --> 01:05:48,360
Speaker 5: or maybe even with your wife, who knows.

1390
01:05:48,480 --> 01:05:50,520
Speaker 4: Yeah, after reading a few of the comments, I decided

1391
01:05:50,560 --> 01:05:53,160
Speaker 4: to make things right and apologize. She was still asleep,

1392
01:05:53,200 --> 01:05:54,720
Speaker 4: so I took our daughter to pick up some of

1393
01:05:54,720 --> 01:05:57,120
Speaker 4: her favorite waffles at our local diner and got her

1394
01:05:57,240 --> 01:05:59,960
Speaker 4: usual order there. My daughter and I set it all up,

1395
01:06:00,080 --> 01:06:02,360
Speaker 4: and I woke my wife up with breakfast in bed.

1396
01:06:03,000 --> 01:06:05,160
Speaker 4: Still looked like she wanted to stab me, but she

1397
01:06:05,240 --> 01:06:08,000
Speaker 4: lightened up a bit when she saw the food. I

1398
01:06:08,080 --> 01:06:10,320
Speaker 4: sent my daughter out to watch Netflix, and my wife

1399
01:06:10,360 --> 01:06:12,680
Speaker 4: and I had to talk about what happened. I laid

1400
01:06:12,720 --> 01:06:15,480
Speaker 4: it on thick, as one of the redditors suggested. I

1401
01:06:15,520 --> 01:06:17,840
Speaker 4: told her how I meant that I had very masculine

1402
01:06:17,880 --> 01:06:20,919
Speaker 4: features that I'm glad our daughter grew out of. How

1403
01:06:21,120 --> 01:06:23,200
Speaker 4: I was so happy that she's starting to take after

1404
01:06:23,240 --> 01:06:25,800
Speaker 4: the most beautiful woman in the world, which is true.

1405
01:06:25,920 --> 01:06:28,440
Speaker 4: Apparently my wife thought that I was calling her and

1406
01:06:28,520 --> 01:06:31,760
Speaker 4: our daughter ugly. No idea where that came from, but okay,

1407
01:06:32,160 --> 01:06:34,520
Speaker 4: I explained it all and how it went down. She

1408
01:06:34,680 --> 01:06:37,120
Speaker 4: had the pretending to be mad face on that she

1409
01:06:37,680 --> 01:06:40,439
Speaker 4: that can melt anyone's heart. As she stuffed her face

1410
01:06:40,480 --> 01:06:43,160
Speaker 4: with food. I kissed her on the forehead and promised

1411
01:06:43,160 --> 01:06:45,400
Speaker 4: to make it up to her that day, which was yesterday.

1412
01:06:45,400 --> 01:06:46,400
Speaker 4: We're fixing things.

1413
01:06:46,560 --> 01:06:50,360
Speaker 5: That's all it takes. Again, exactly it happens. This does happen.

1414
01:06:50,480 --> 01:06:54,960
Speaker 5: It's like you misheard something. It's fine, right, fine, everything's okay.

1415
01:06:55,040 --> 01:06:56,840
Speaker 4: And then you just eat food together in bed and

1416
01:06:56,880 --> 01:06:59,320
Speaker 4: then you're good eating. I ended up taking them both

1417
01:06:59,360 --> 01:07:01,640
Speaker 4: out for lunch, ordered take out for dinner, and ate

1418
01:07:01,720 --> 01:07:03,760
Speaker 4: a bow load of ice cream that night while watching

1419
01:07:03,760 --> 01:07:06,840
Speaker 4: movies together with our kid Cherry on top. I actually

1420
01:07:06,880 --> 01:07:08,680
Speaker 4: got to sleep in a bed, cuddling with the love

1421
01:07:08,720 --> 01:07:11,720
Speaker 4: of my life. Best night in a long time.

1422
01:07:12,520 --> 01:07:13,120
Speaker 2: Was I wrong?

1423
01:07:13,360 --> 01:07:14,040
Speaker 5: Was she wrong?

1424
01:07:14,200 --> 01:07:17,200
Speaker 4: Well? To be honest, none of that really matters anymore.

1425
01:07:17,400 --> 01:07:19,720
Speaker 4: It's behind us. Something like this isn't the hill that

1426
01:07:19,760 --> 01:07:22,320
Speaker 4: I wanted to pass away on. So I'd rather sleep

1427
01:07:22,360 --> 01:07:24,800
Speaker 4: on a bed with my lovely wife than keep my

1428
01:07:24,960 --> 01:07:28,440
Speaker 4: pride intact sleeping on the couch fighting back pain. Thanks guys,

1429
01:07:28,480 --> 01:07:30,200
Speaker 4: I can't believe an am I The A hole post

1430
01:07:30,280 --> 01:07:33,000
Speaker 4: turned into a relationship advice post haha