1 00:00:04,400 --> 00:00:12,360 Speaker 1: World us your mind. 2 00:00:12,840 --> 00:00:15,160 Speaker 2: Sillion pieces would. 3 00:00:18,960 --> 00:00:30,120 Speaker 1: Ba Ladies and gentlemen, Welcome to Bananas minisode. 4 00:00:30,760 --> 00:00:34,280 Speaker 2: Oh we got another minis. That is my favorite stand 5 00:00:34,320 --> 00:00:38,479 Speaker 2: up comedian, Kurt Brown Owler. And that is my favorite writer, 6 00:00:38,640 --> 00:00:41,440 Speaker 2: Scottie Lamb. I'll take it. I'll take it. I wrote 7 00:00:41,479 --> 00:00:42,680 Speaker 2: that for him. It sounded good. 8 00:00:45,720 --> 00:00:49,400 Speaker 1: Uh, we got your stories. This is all about you, Bananimals. 9 00:00:49,800 --> 00:00:50,960 Speaker 1: These are your stories. 10 00:00:51,479 --> 00:00:54,760 Speaker 2: I love some good minisodes. I love the minisodes. I 11 00:00:54,920 --> 00:00:56,840 Speaker 2: like to know that the world is silly and strange 12 00:00:56,880 --> 00:00:59,400 Speaker 2: and that people have taste, that are listeners, that the 13 00:00:59,440 --> 00:01:04,160 Speaker 2: great and wise Bananimals know our tone, know what we 14 00:01:04,200 --> 00:01:06,160 Speaker 2: love and share it with us joyfully. 15 00:01:06,760 --> 00:01:11,319 Speaker 1: It's really really wonderful. I'm saying, quick check in, how 16 00:01:11,360 --> 00:01:12,240 Speaker 1: you doing you good? 17 00:01:12,520 --> 00:01:16,720 Speaker 2: I'm great, I'm really good. I'm busy writing. I feel 18 00:01:16,760 --> 00:01:21,120 Speaker 2: like the great Koar is slowly evaporating and we're getting 19 00:01:21,160 --> 00:01:25,760 Speaker 2: closer and closer to the real world returning. Wait and 20 00:01:25,880 --> 00:01:30,199 Speaker 2: for our Stitcher Premium listeners who get this on Thursdays, 21 00:01:31,640 --> 00:01:34,000 Speaker 2: all of them I think are gonna slowly be released 22 00:01:34,040 --> 00:01:36,280 Speaker 2: after they've been on stitch a Premium for six months. 23 00:01:36,280 --> 00:01:39,840 Speaker 2: So I think these minisodes will start to be available 24 00:01:40,680 --> 00:01:43,240 Speaker 2: in like a month or so. We're getting close. So 25 00:01:43,520 --> 00:01:46,119 Speaker 2: thank you to everybody sign up for Stitcher Premium because 26 00:01:46,120 --> 00:01:47,000 Speaker 2: of bananas. 27 00:01:47,240 --> 00:01:49,280 Speaker 3: Yeah, you are the best here. I'm gonna get you 28 00:01:49,360 --> 00:01:50,200 Speaker 3: right into one. 29 00:01:50,000 --> 00:01:53,800 Speaker 2: Scotch, do it, buddy? Okay mm hmmm. 30 00:01:54,760 --> 00:02:01,000 Speaker 1: From Whimsical femme on love her Instagram and her like 31 00:02:01,080 --> 00:02:03,640 Speaker 1: that's her handle and then her name is just a 32 00:02:03,680 --> 00:02:07,840 Speaker 1: series of flower emojis, so it was very difficult to 33 00:02:07,880 --> 00:02:11,640 Speaker 1: search what I was like, Oh no, it's just a 34 00:02:11,680 --> 00:02:14,079 Speaker 1: bunch of flowers. I just have to go through all 35 00:02:14,120 --> 00:02:18,320 Speaker 1: the messages because I can't search for these flowers flower emojis. 36 00:02:18,440 --> 00:02:21,360 Speaker 2: You just reminded me of a story, so I cannot 37 00:02:21,440 --> 00:02:24,400 Speaker 2: wait to hear this one. Okay, flower emojis. I'm actually 38 00:02:24,400 --> 00:02:26,920 Speaker 2: gonna switch my story up based on what you just said. 39 00:02:27,320 --> 00:02:30,919 Speaker 1: Alrighty, a story for you. I grew up in late 40 00:02:31,440 --> 00:02:35,040 Speaker 1: a lake community in Metro Detroit. Our house was on 41 00:02:35,080 --> 00:02:38,480 Speaker 1: the end of a peninsula with lake on two sides 42 00:02:38,520 --> 00:02:42,360 Speaker 1: and a canal on the third. It was a busy 43 00:02:42,440 --> 00:02:44,720 Speaker 1: lake with a lot of drunk people doing stupid shit, 44 00:02:44,760 --> 00:02:46,960 Speaker 1: and this was no different. My mom would go out 45 00:02:47,000 --> 00:02:49,280 Speaker 1: at six am to run, and one morning she went 46 00:02:49,320 --> 00:02:54,079 Speaker 1: out to find our floodlight on, could have our jeep 47 00:02:54,160 --> 00:02:57,320 Speaker 1: open and a shirtless man trying to pull the battery out. 48 00:02:57,680 --> 00:03:00,600 Speaker 3: Creepy yep, but don't worry. 49 00:03:00,800 --> 00:03:04,600 Speaker 1: It turns when he saw my mom, he started to run, 50 00:03:04,720 --> 00:03:07,520 Speaker 1: which is when my mom realized that he was completely naked. 51 00:03:08,720 --> 00:03:12,000 Speaker 3: He ran to the edge of our property. This is 52 00:03:12,040 --> 00:03:12,400 Speaker 3: the best. 53 00:03:12,400 --> 00:03:14,560 Speaker 1: He ran into the edge of our property and jumped 54 00:03:14,600 --> 00:03:17,440 Speaker 1: into the water as she went inside to grab our 55 00:03:17,520 --> 00:03:21,200 Speaker 1: cordless phone before walking along the edge of the water. 56 00:03:21,320 --> 00:03:24,960 Speaker 1: From the distance, the guy was swimming as fast as 57 00:03:25,000 --> 00:03:27,760 Speaker 1: he could, just right alongside our property. 58 00:03:28,240 --> 00:03:31,880 Speaker 4: Oh, completely unaware that my Bob was watching him flail 59 00:03:31,960 --> 00:03:34,800 Speaker 4: in the water as he made his quote escape because 60 00:03:34,840 --> 00:03:37,840 Speaker 4: he thinks he's like going around the corner, like that's 61 00:03:37,960 --> 00:03:38,520 Speaker 4: just still there. 62 00:03:38,920 --> 00:03:40,840 Speaker 3: That's just she could just walk across the pits. 63 00:03:40,840 --> 00:03:42,839 Speaker 2: He can only swim like three four miles an hour. 64 00:03:43,240 --> 00:03:44,560 Speaker 2: It's a very easy walk. 65 00:03:45,720 --> 00:03:48,280 Speaker 1: He swam around to our backyard where a boat was 66 00:03:48,320 --> 00:03:52,280 Speaker 1: tied off on our dock. He swam a distance that 67 00:03:52,400 --> 00:03:55,280 Speaker 1: was about two hundred feet That took him about five minutes, 68 00:03:55,320 --> 00:03:57,600 Speaker 1: when he could have easily ran in less than a minute. 69 00:03:59,360 --> 00:04:02,120 Speaker 1: The police came and found the guy in a fight 70 00:04:02,360 --> 00:04:05,960 Speaker 1: with another guy on board who is also nude, and 71 00:04:06,040 --> 00:04:08,920 Speaker 1: having sex with the also nude girl on board what 72 00:04:09,560 --> 00:04:12,360 Speaker 1: who my mom later found out was with the swimming 73 00:04:12,480 --> 00:04:15,880 Speaker 1: naked guy. They were out on their boat all day, 74 00:04:16,040 --> 00:04:18,600 Speaker 1: were drunk and ended up at our house after they 75 00:04:18,720 --> 00:04:21,520 Speaker 1: floated to shore when they ran out of gas. Oh, 76 00:04:21,680 --> 00:04:24,880 Speaker 1: they were trying to steal the battery, Mike, it would 77 00:04:24,960 --> 00:04:31,200 Speaker 1: start their boat again, but they were obviously caught. I 78 00:04:31,360 --> 00:04:38,039 Speaker 1: love I love how many bad choices and confusing ideas 79 00:04:38,200 --> 00:04:39,279 Speaker 1: were involved here. 80 00:04:39,560 --> 00:04:41,919 Speaker 2: Yes, this is such a good one that like it 81 00:04:42,120 --> 00:04:46,080 Speaker 2: just keeps going. It's just wait, who is the naked 82 00:04:46,080 --> 00:04:47,840 Speaker 2: guy having sex with on the boat? Who's the other 83 00:04:47,880 --> 00:04:48,720 Speaker 2: person's having sex with? 84 00:04:48,760 --> 00:04:48,880 Speaker 4: What? 85 00:04:49,120 --> 00:04:49,560 Speaker 2: Each other? 86 00:04:50,360 --> 00:04:52,960 Speaker 3: So? So it was a couple and a buddy. 87 00:04:53,160 --> 00:04:53,839 Speaker 2: Okay, got it? 88 00:04:53,880 --> 00:04:56,680 Speaker 1: Okay, they got wasted. The man who was in the 89 00:04:56,720 --> 00:05:01,039 Speaker 1: couple went to steal a battery because that's the things 90 00:05:01,080 --> 00:05:03,480 Speaker 1: have you know, they think that their boat doesn't work 91 00:05:03,480 --> 00:05:05,880 Speaker 1: because of a battery. Oh boy, And then the buddy 92 00:05:05,920 --> 00:05:08,719 Speaker 1: started having sex with his girlfriend while he was trying 93 00:05:08,720 --> 00:05:12,200 Speaker 1: to save them, and then swimming alongside the shore. I 94 00:05:12,240 --> 00:05:14,360 Speaker 1: love that because it is like that idea of like 95 00:05:14,440 --> 00:05:18,440 Speaker 1: when you stay up all night, how quickly and easily 96 00:05:18,520 --> 00:05:21,160 Speaker 1: you start making bad decisions. 97 00:05:20,600 --> 00:05:21,680 Speaker 2: You know, that's right. 98 00:05:22,720 --> 00:05:24,720 Speaker 1: I So we'd used to do this thing in New 99 00:05:24,800 --> 00:05:28,160 Speaker 1: York and I don't know, like nine two thousand and 100 00:05:28,160 --> 00:05:31,279 Speaker 1: two thousand and one, okay, and it's called Psychogeography Project 101 00:05:31,279 --> 00:05:31,680 Speaker 1: New York. 102 00:05:31,880 --> 00:05:34,840 Speaker 3: I think it was before I knew you Scotti for sure. 103 00:05:34,880 --> 00:05:39,000 Speaker 1: And this was all about, like it was all based 104 00:05:39,000 --> 00:05:42,479 Speaker 1: on like the thing of psychogeography, right, that was you know, 105 00:05:42,600 --> 00:05:45,320 Speaker 1: invented in the twenties and in France, which was like 106 00:05:45,400 --> 00:05:49,440 Speaker 1: the idea of like the FID the urban landscape has 107 00:05:49,839 --> 00:05:52,080 Speaker 1: as much of a physical map of it as a 108 00:05:52,120 --> 00:05:54,479 Speaker 1: mental map that we kind of project onto how we 109 00:05:54,520 --> 00:05:56,400 Speaker 1: think about where we live in the city. And so 110 00:05:56,440 --> 00:05:59,000 Speaker 1: we were like doing all these things to like make 111 00:05:59,040 --> 00:06:02,080 Speaker 1: ourselves and other people think about the space they were 112 00:06:02,080 --> 00:06:03,920 Speaker 1: in in a different way. It's kind of also where 113 00:06:04,000 --> 00:06:06,120 Speaker 1: cheg when a Chunk came from. So we would do 114 00:06:06,160 --> 00:06:09,040 Speaker 1: these things called twenty four hour road trips, which were 115 00:06:09,040 --> 00:06:12,120 Speaker 1: an attempt to recreate the feeling that you have when 116 00:06:12,160 --> 00:06:14,159 Speaker 1: you go on like a real road trip, you know, 117 00:06:14,200 --> 00:06:17,599 Speaker 1: where it's like it's just like so long and so 118 00:06:18,680 --> 00:06:21,120 Speaker 1: repetitive that all of a sudden, like you start talking, 119 00:06:21,240 --> 00:06:23,000 Speaker 1: then you then you get into a fight, and then 120 00:06:23,040 --> 00:06:24,679 Speaker 1: you can cut of it and then like you're stronger 121 00:06:24,720 --> 00:06:26,800 Speaker 1: at the end for like having gone through it. But 122 00:06:26,880 --> 00:06:28,520 Speaker 1: we would condense it and do it all in twenty 123 00:06:28,600 --> 00:06:32,960 Speaker 1: four hours. So the rules were in the twenty four hours, 124 00:06:32,960 --> 00:06:34,880 Speaker 1: you had to visit all five burrows and you had 125 00:06:34,880 --> 00:06:36,760 Speaker 1: to take all five modes of transportation. 126 00:06:36,920 --> 00:06:37,720 Speaker 2: So that's cool. 127 00:06:38,560 --> 00:06:44,640 Speaker 1: Walk, car, train, boat and bus. The boat was always 128 00:06:44,960 --> 00:06:48,320 Speaker 1: obviously my the most fun for me. Ext love that boat, 129 00:06:48,400 --> 00:06:50,919 Speaker 1: that boat, like love them. So first one we do, 130 00:06:51,480 --> 00:06:54,760 Speaker 1: we've been up all night and I drank. I drank 131 00:06:54,800 --> 00:06:56,359 Speaker 1: because it was like whatever, you know, I started drinking 132 00:06:56,400 --> 00:06:59,320 Speaker 1: like midnight drinking at four and then it was like 133 00:06:59,480 --> 00:07:01,080 Speaker 1: and I was in my twenties and then I was 134 00:07:01,120 --> 00:07:03,560 Speaker 1: just like push through, push through. And at six am, 135 00:07:04,040 --> 00:07:07,440 Speaker 1: we take the train out to Sheepshead Bay, Okay, and 136 00:07:07,480 --> 00:07:08,480 Speaker 1: we get. 137 00:07:08,160 --> 00:07:11,239 Speaker 2: On deep Deep Brooklyn for our listeners, yeah. 138 00:07:11,240 --> 00:07:15,560 Speaker 1: Deep Deep Brooklyn, and we get on a fishing boat. 139 00:07:16,160 --> 00:07:18,480 Speaker 1: Then at six am we go out and we watch 140 00:07:18,600 --> 00:07:21,800 Speaker 1: the sunrise on the fishing boat and they're fishing for fluke, 141 00:07:21,880 --> 00:07:25,400 Speaker 1: you know, yes, and uh fluke and flounder and they 142 00:07:25,440 --> 00:07:27,480 Speaker 1: bring us up around the corner of and I had 143 00:07:27,520 --> 00:07:28,640 Speaker 1: never been out there on a boat. 144 00:07:28,680 --> 00:07:30,840 Speaker 3: It was awesome, like the like the edge of. 145 00:07:32,840 --> 00:07:34,960 Speaker 1: Uh, the other side of New York Harbor, which is 146 00:07:35,000 --> 00:07:38,600 Speaker 1: in New Jersey, and yeah, uh and like there's this 147 00:07:38,680 --> 00:07:41,040 Speaker 1: little spit of sand that comes out right at the end. 148 00:07:41,800 --> 00:07:45,480 Speaker 3: Uh. And I was fishing. We're all fishing sandy too. 149 00:07:45,600 --> 00:07:46,320 Speaker 2: You've been up all night. 150 00:07:46,320 --> 00:07:51,520 Speaker 1: You got a fish, fishing, drinking some beers and uh. 151 00:07:51,640 --> 00:07:53,320 Speaker 1: And then all of a sudden, I catch something and 152 00:07:53,360 --> 00:07:57,280 Speaker 1: it's big and like you see the fucking and no, 153 00:07:57,440 --> 00:08:00,640 Speaker 1: I hadn't caught a goddamn thing the whole time, right excited, 154 00:08:00,960 --> 00:08:04,160 Speaker 1: everybody gets excited because we're all like drunk and idiots 155 00:08:04,200 --> 00:08:05,360 Speaker 1: and no one's caught anything. 156 00:08:05,840 --> 00:08:07,080 Speaker 3: It's like, oh, he's got something big. 157 00:08:07,120 --> 00:08:09,240 Speaker 1: And I'm like and the guy's like, okay, let it go, now, 158 00:08:09,280 --> 00:08:11,720 Speaker 1: reel it, now, let it go, now, reel it. 159 00:08:11,840 --> 00:08:13,720 Speaker 3: I'm like, yeah, yeah, and I'm doing it. And I'm 160 00:08:13,720 --> 00:08:14,360 Speaker 3: doing it, and then. 161 00:08:14,200 --> 00:08:17,720 Speaker 1: We're all looking and then as I see something that 162 00:08:17,800 --> 00:08:20,040 Speaker 1: look it's like going like back and forth, like a 163 00:08:20,080 --> 00:08:23,280 Speaker 1: big fish, back and forth, back and forth through the water. 164 00:08:23,560 --> 00:08:25,520 Speaker 1: And then I finally pull it up out of the 165 00:08:25,520 --> 00:08:31,560 Speaker 1: water and it is a child's school desk from like 166 00:08:31,640 --> 00:08:35,480 Speaker 1: the nineteen fifty what. Yes, and I have hooked where 167 00:08:35,480 --> 00:08:38,520 Speaker 1: the pencil goes, you know, like at the top of 168 00:08:38,559 --> 00:08:39,160 Speaker 1: the wood thing. 169 00:08:39,320 --> 00:08:43,480 Speaker 3: That is what is hooked on the fucking thing. And 170 00:08:43,520 --> 00:08:48,080 Speaker 3: I was like, I caught a desk. I caught a desk, 171 00:08:48,160 --> 00:08:48,559 Speaker 3: and I. 172 00:08:48,600 --> 00:08:49,600 Speaker 2: Was so excited. 173 00:08:50,080 --> 00:08:53,080 Speaker 1: And then the guy who runs who like was like 174 00:08:53,120 --> 00:08:54,880 Speaker 1: working the boat just came up like yeah, it happens 175 00:08:54,880 --> 00:08:56,400 Speaker 1: all the time, and he just cut my line. I 176 00:08:56,440 --> 00:08:59,120 Speaker 1: was like no, and I watched the desk like sinking, 177 00:08:59,200 --> 00:09:01,520 Speaker 1: and I was like, I would have fucking walked all 178 00:09:01,679 --> 00:09:04,199 Speaker 1: day with this desk and then kept it and it 179 00:09:04,200 --> 00:09:06,800 Speaker 1: would have been my favorite thing in the entire world. 180 00:09:07,200 --> 00:09:09,720 Speaker 2: Yeah, your children would be drawing and doodling on that 181 00:09:09,840 --> 00:09:11,120 Speaker 2: desk right now. 182 00:09:11,280 --> 00:09:13,520 Speaker 3: Yes, that is what happens all the time. 183 00:09:13,960 --> 00:09:16,360 Speaker 2: Yeah, we know, we know that the Hudson River and 184 00:09:16,400 --> 00:09:19,400 Speaker 2: the East River are the most disgusting rivers in the world. 185 00:09:20,600 --> 00:09:22,559 Speaker 2: I guess they put oyster beds in that are making 186 00:09:22,559 --> 00:09:23,600 Speaker 2: it slightly better. 187 00:09:23,760 --> 00:09:24,520 Speaker 3: Fingers Cross. 188 00:09:25,440 --> 00:09:29,760 Speaker 2: I was fishing one night in Pensacola Beach with Rusty Steel, 189 00:09:29,920 --> 00:09:31,240 Speaker 2: real name Rusty Steel. 190 00:09:31,360 --> 00:09:32,880 Speaker 3: That's amazing, and. 191 00:09:34,360 --> 00:09:36,120 Speaker 2: He is a third He said, if you ever had 192 00:09:36,120 --> 00:09:38,080 Speaker 2: a son, he was going to name him Rusty Steel 193 00:09:38,120 --> 00:09:40,439 Speaker 2: and then just Calm Quattro, which I always thought was 194 00:09:40,480 --> 00:09:44,360 Speaker 2: a great plan for ruining a child's life. And he 195 00:09:44,360 --> 00:09:46,120 Speaker 2: he has a boat, his parents, he's from down there. 196 00:09:46,200 --> 00:09:47,800 Speaker 2: So he's like, do you want to go shark fishing? 197 00:09:48,200 --> 00:09:50,040 Speaker 2: At like four am? We were drinking all night. I 198 00:09:50,080 --> 00:09:52,800 Speaker 2: was like, yes, we do. So we go to Walmart 199 00:09:52,840 --> 00:09:55,640 Speaker 2: and we buy frozen chum at three am. 200 00:09:56,040 --> 00:09:58,360 Speaker 3: You can. I bought a I chum at Walmart. 201 00:09:58,480 --> 00:10:01,360 Speaker 2: Frozen chum. Yeah, gall breeze. And then I had to 202 00:10:01,360 --> 00:10:03,360 Speaker 2: get a fishing license because we were going to be out, 203 00:10:03,440 --> 00:10:05,920 Speaker 2: and so they have like twenty four hour fishing licenses 204 00:10:05,960 --> 00:10:08,600 Speaker 2: which are like, I don't know, four bucks or ten bucks. 205 00:10:09,880 --> 00:10:12,360 Speaker 2: And so then we go to this this little fishing 206 00:10:12,400 --> 00:10:15,480 Speaker 2: place that opens to buy some more tackle or whatever, 207 00:10:16,040 --> 00:10:18,160 Speaker 2: and there's this picture of a make a shark and 208 00:10:18,200 --> 00:10:21,240 Speaker 2: the guy working behind the counter in this little sleepy 209 00:10:21,280 --> 00:10:24,679 Speaker 2: baiting tackle shop, it's him with the shark, and if 210 00:10:24,679 --> 00:10:27,719 Speaker 2: I'm lying, I'm dying. This is exactly how the interaction goes. 211 00:10:27,760 --> 00:10:29,440 Speaker 2: And again we've been drinking all night. Now it's like 212 00:10:29,480 --> 00:10:33,640 Speaker 2: five am, and I was like, whoa cool, where'd you 213 00:10:33,679 --> 00:10:37,360 Speaker 2: catch that? And he goes in the water and I 214 00:10:37,440 --> 00:10:42,720 Speaker 2: go okay, what where in the water? He goes in 215 00:10:42,800 --> 00:10:45,160 Speaker 2: a boat and I go okay, so you're in a 216 00:10:45,160 --> 00:10:48,720 Speaker 2: boat in the water. What body of water? He goes 217 00:10:49,400 --> 00:10:51,920 Speaker 2: Golf of Mexico and I go okay, so were you 218 00:10:52,040 --> 00:10:55,199 Speaker 2: near Pensacola? I got and so this guy just slowly 219 00:10:55,200 --> 00:10:57,760 Speaker 2: gave me one word answers like a jerk the entire time. 220 00:10:57,840 --> 00:11:00,559 Speaker 2: And then I realized that it's like why am I? 221 00:11:00,559 --> 00:11:02,720 Speaker 2: I'm like, why am I making conversation with this guy? 222 00:11:02,760 --> 00:11:04,560 Speaker 2: That's just like, buy the chum and get out of here, 223 00:11:04,640 --> 00:11:08,480 Speaker 2: you bozos. Oh man, we should tell that story on 224 00:11:08,520 --> 00:11:11,720 Speaker 2: the main podcast sometime about how Mac and his buddies 225 00:11:11,720 --> 00:11:14,920 Speaker 2: built that wood submarine and the Coastguard came out to 226 00:11:14,960 --> 00:11:17,480 Speaker 2: get him because they floated a submarine up the East River. 227 00:11:17,880 --> 00:11:20,640 Speaker 5: Let's do it on Friday. Let's do it Friday. It's 228 00:11:20,679 --> 00:11:26,360 Speaker 5: a good one. Yeah, your story with the flower emojis 229 00:11:26,400 --> 00:11:28,840 Speaker 5: reminded me of one. So I'm switching stories now. 230 00:11:29,000 --> 00:11:30,320 Speaker 2: Okay, I'm gonna. 231 00:11:30,000 --> 00:11:32,120 Speaker 1: Do but you know what I think that dude was 232 00:11:32,160 --> 00:11:35,400 Speaker 1: trying to do what's that he was keeping his spot private? 233 00:11:35,920 --> 00:11:41,440 Speaker 2: Yeah, yes, mako shark spot. Yeah where were you where'd 234 00:11:41,440 --> 00:11:42,760 Speaker 2: you catch him in the mouth? 235 00:11:42,920 --> 00:11:43,040 Speaker 4: No? 236 00:11:43,200 --> 00:11:45,000 Speaker 2: Where where were you in the water? 237 00:11:45,040 --> 00:11:47,960 Speaker 3: Surfers. Surfers do that ship all the time. 238 00:11:48,160 --> 00:11:50,600 Speaker 1: Really, it's like yeah, like especially if you go in 239 00:11:51,640 --> 00:11:53,840 Speaker 1: if you go to a surf shop in a place 240 00:11:53,880 --> 00:11:56,320 Speaker 1: that you've never been and asked them where to go surfing, 241 00:11:56,400 --> 00:11:59,680 Speaker 1: they will direct you to the shittiest place to go surfing, 242 00:11:59,760 --> 00:12:01,839 Speaker 1: Like do you know what I mean? Like they're gonna 243 00:12:01,840 --> 00:12:04,760 Speaker 1: be like, send all of the tourists to this one place. 244 00:12:04,880 --> 00:12:11,040 Speaker 3: You know, guys go to Waikiki Beach. H that's the best. 245 00:12:11,200 --> 00:12:14,840 Speaker 2: That's not Funkiki, but there's a great comedy club there. 246 00:12:14,840 --> 00:12:17,640 Speaker 2: I hopeing we tour we actually do go and play Wikiki. 247 00:12:17,679 --> 00:12:22,680 Speaker 2: That would be perfect for bananas. We love our Hawaiian bananamals. Okay, 248 00:12:22,720 --> 00:12:25,120 Speaker 2: here's a great one. This is sent in by Ariana, 249 00:12:25,280 --> 00:12:27,680 Speaker 2: who also sent in the pirate who ate the entire 250 00:12:27,760 --> 00:12:31,760 Speaker 2: cheese cake story a few minies a dozen minisodes back. 251 00:12:32,000 --> 00:12:36,920 Speaker 2: She Ariana gets gets what we like. It's a long one, 252 00:12:36,960 --> 00:12:42,040 Speaker 2: so jump in as we go. Ok So, before I 253 00:12:42,080 --> 00:12:43,760 Speaker 2: get into the story, I wanted to give you guys 254 00:12:43,800 --> 00:12:48,320 Speaker 2: some context. In college, I studied mechanical engineering and we 255 00:12:48,400 --> 00:12:51,520 Speaker 2: had to do a big capstone project to complete our degrees. 256 00:12:51,840 --> 00:12:54,880 Speaker 2: I was part of the university's racing team, where we 257 00:12:54,960 --> 00:12:58,280 Speaker 2: design and built full size Formula one style race cars 258 00:12:58,920 --> 00:13:02,400 Speaker 2: and then race it against the universities. That's fun. That's 259 00:13:02,440 --> 00:13:07,280 Speaker 2: already so far. So the thing is the projects would 260 00:13:07,280 --> 00:13:09,600 Speaker 2: cost tons of money. We would get small grants from 261 00:13:09,640 --> 00:13:12,920 Speaker 2: our department, but in order to remain competitive with other schools, 262 00:13:12,920 --> 00:13:16,240 Speaker 2: we had to do fundraisers to get sponsorships. It was hard, 263 00:13:16,600 --> 00:13:19,960 Speaker 2: but my banana stories come. My banana story comes from 264 00:13:20,040 --> 00:13:24,280 Speaker 2: one of those fundraisers. All right, Okay, So as a team, 265 00:13:24,440 --> 00:13:26,800 Speaker 2: a majority of us were drink of drinking age, so 266 00:13:26,880 --> 00:13:30,400 Speaker 2: we did a bunch of fundraisers at local breweries. I 267 00:13:30,559 --> 00:13:33,600 Speaker 2: love great start to any story. They're building race cars 268 00:13:33,640 --> 00:13:38,520 Speaker 2: and they're going to breweries. We would invite our friends, family, 269 00:13:38,559 --> 00:13:41,439 Speaker 2: and department faculty members to eat, drink and earn some money. 270 00:13:41,480 --> 00:13:43,240 Speaker 2: During my senior year, we had a guy on our 271 00:13:43,280 --> 00:13:46,520 Speaker 2: team who I'm gonna call James. Also good when we 272 00:13:46,600 --> 00:13:48,960 Speaker 2: have to use pseudonyms, you know these stories are good. 273 00:13:49,840 --> 00:13:53,960 Speaker 2: Not his actual name. He was definitely allergic to alcohol. 274 00:13:59,160 --> 00:14:01,319 Speaker 2: I'm talking once me and off ice and he's black 275 00:14:01,320 --> 00:14:04,920 Speaker 2: out drunk. Oh wow, great guy to take to a 276 00:14:04,960 --> 00:14:07,760 Speaker 2: brewery during a fundraiser where you're encouraged to spend your 277 00:14:07,760 --> 00:14:10,720 Speaker 2: money to raise money. Oh didn't you do one once 278 00:14:10,760 --> 00:14:13,280 Speaker 2: where you guys bartended to raise money for an improv 279 00:14:13,320 --> 00:14:15,360 Speaker 2: team or something. Wasn't that like a New York thing 280 00:14:15,360 --> 00:14:16,280 Speaker 2: that happened now and there? 281 00:14:16,360 --> 00:14:19,800 Speaker 1: Yeah, someone would yeah, yeah, someone would bartend and everyone 282 00:14:19,800 --> 00:14:21,760 Speaker 1: would just go. But it wasn't even to raise money. 283 00:14:21,800 --> 00:14:23,840 Speaker 1: It was like literally for that person to make money. 284 00:14:24,200 --> 00:14:25,720 Speaker 2: Oh. I like that even more. 285 00:14:25,800 --> 00:14:26,400 Speaker 3: I remember too. 286 00:14:26,520 --> 00:14:28,520 Speaker 1: Or was just like, hey, let's go down. He's bartender 287 00:14:28,520 --> 00:14:31,320 Speaker 1: and he's you know, it's like just one night. Yeah, 288 00:14:31,320 --> 00:14:32,840 Speaker 1: and so it's like to get the place to have 289 00:14:32,880 --> 00:14:35,400 Speaker 1: some business, and then he would keep the tip the tips. 290 00:14:35,800 --> 00:14:37,880 Speaker 2: That's a cool idea. I hope people do that when 291 00:14:37,880 --> 00:14:39,840 Speaker 2: the Great War is over. Yeah, we all got to 292 00:14:39,880 --> 00:14:43,040 Speaker 2: spread the spread the wealth around. Okay. So he would 293 00:14:43,040 --> 00:14:45,520 Speaker 2: also break out, James, this is would also break out 294 00:14:45,520 --> 00:14:47,600 Speaker 2: in hives when he would start drinking. I mean, this 295 00:14:47,680 --> 00:14:50,200 Speaker 2: guy is super allergic to alcohol. He should not be 296 00:14:50,280 --> 00:14:56,200 Speaker 2: drinking and around. Uh and he would be completely out 297 00:14:56,200 --> 00:14:58,720 Speaker 2: of it by the time the second beer was finished. 298 00:14:58,880 --> 00:15:03,000 Speaker 2: So at this fundraiser, James drank exactly two light beers 299 00:15:03,000 --> 00:15:07,920 Speaker 2: five percent alcohol ax and got absolutely annihilated. He was 300 00:15:07,960 --> 00:15:11,440 Speaker 2: slurring his words, leaning on people, flirting with absolutely everyone, 301 00:15:12,640 --> 00:15:16,600 Speaker 2: normal normal drunken behavior for a typical American idiot. At 302 00:15:16,640 --> 00:15:18,240 Speaker 2: one point he laid on top of one of the 303 00:15:18,240 --> 00:15:20,840 Speaker 2: tables and took a face down ten minute nap. 304 00:15:21,320 --> 00:15:26,720 Speaker 4: We also we had also invented planking blanket. 305 00:15:26,960 --> 00:15:29,080 Speaker 2: It's the first James it should be called James ing. 306 00:15:30,360 --> 00:15:33,760 Speaker 2: It's also just passing out drunk. So we also brought 307 00:15:33,960 --> 00:15:36,360 Speaker 2: our car to the fundraiser to show off a race 308 00:15:36,400 --> 00:15:39,920 Speaker 2: car Formula one car. Wow. He proceeds to stumble over 309 00:15:40,000 --> 00:15:44,320 Speaker 2: and fall into the driver's seat. He then crawled or 310 00:15:44,480 --> 00:15:47,120 Speaker 2: turned around, crawled his way in, and started to turn 311 00:15:47,200 --> 00:15:50,360 Speaker 2: the car on to try driving it. Now I guess 312 00:15:50,360 --> 00:15:52,280 Speaker 2: he had forgotten how to turn it on he was 313 00:15:52,320 --> 00:15:55,640 Speaker 2: so drunk, so he just loudly starts making engine noises 314 00:15:55,680 --> 00:16:00,800 Speaker 2: with his mouth. Then he starts violently yanking steering wheel 315 00:16:00,960 --> 00:16:03,920 Speaker 2: back and forth and announcing that he was doing his 316 00:16:03,960 --> 00:16:08,800 Speaker 2: pretend race in third person. He then instantly falls asleep 317 00:16:08,840 --> 00:16:11,080 Speaker 2: in the car and stayed the sleep for thirty minutes. 318 00:16:15,040 --> 00:16:17,800 Speaker 3: An amazing level drugs, I know. 319 00:16:17,880 --> 00:16:22,400 Speaker 2: For two light beers. As I said, our faculty would 320 00:16:22,400 --> 00:16:26,400 Speaker 2: show up as well. Our faculty coordinator and various professors 321 00:16:26,480 --> 00:16:29,760 Speaker 2: arrived during James's napping session and inquire about his state. 322 00:16:30,720 --> 00:16:33,760 Speaker 2: Once once a bunch of them had showed up, we 323 00:16:34,000 --> 00:16:36,240 Speaker 2: helped him out of the car and he went and 324 00:16:36,280 --> 00:16:39,240 Speaker 2: tried to talk to the faculty. On his way over 325 00:16:39,360 --> 00:16:42,480 Speaker 2: to the faculty, he tripped over his own feet, landed 326 00:16:42,520 --> 00:16:46,000 Speaker 2: on a table, and spilled drinks everywhere. After he fell, 327 00:16:46,240 --> 00:16:48,400 Speaker 2: he somehow got steady enough to lean on the table 328 00:16:48,520 --> 00:16:52,640 Speaker 2: started mumbling incoherently at them. They were obviously weirded out 329 00:16:52,720 --> 00:16:54,880 Speaker 2: and not happy that he was so sloppy drunk at 330 00:16:54,880 --> 00:16:59,440 Speaker 2: a school function. So the faculty leaves almost immediately. The 331 00:16:59,520 --> 00:17:04,320 Speaker 2: peace to resistance is that after he left, he crawled 332 00:17:04,359 --> 00:17:07,280 Speaker 2: his way back to the car and refused to get out. 333 00:17:07,640 --> 00:17:11,520 Speaker 2: We eventually just strapped him in I guess buckling him 334 00:17:11,920 --> 00:17:14,399 Speaker 2: and we eventually just trapped him in and rolled him 335 00:17:14,600 --> 00:17:18,160 Speaker 2: in the car into the U haul we used his transportation. 336 00:17:21,040 --> 00:17:23,959 Speaker 2: Oh man, that's my favorite, just being drunk and strapped 337 00:17:24,000 --> 00:17:25,719 Speaker 2: to a race car in the back of a black 338 00:17:25,880 --> 00:17:30,040 Speaker 2: U haul just going around the city, set in the lap. 339 00:17:30,720 --> 00:17:33,159 Speaker 2: We secured the car in place and drove the hour 340 00:17:33,560 --> 00:17:36,440 Speaker 2: back to school with him knocked out in the race car. 341 00:17:37,960 --> 00:17:40,560 Speaker 2: That's such a good visual. To this day, he still 342 00:17:40,600 --> 00:17:43,240 Speaker 2: insists that he does not remember anything about the fun 343 00:17:43,320 --> 00:17:47,320 Speaker 2: I believe him. He doesn't remember the fundraiser. Thanks so much, 344 00:17:47,560 --> 00:17:49,960 Speaker 2: love the podcast This is Arian. I sent him the 345 00:17:49,960 --> 00:17:56,920 Speaker 2: pirate Cheesecake story. Great story. What's so funny? It was 346 00:17:56,960 --> 00:18:01,119 Speaker 2: a mechanical engineering school, she did not say. Probably for 347 00:18:01,280 --> 00:18:05,280 Speaker 2: the right reasons, but uh yeah, you know, drunk stories 348 00:18:05,320 --> 00:18:08,480 Speaker 2: can go Drunk stories can be really familiar because I'll 349 00:18:08,520 --> 00:18:11,399 Speaker 2: call makes everybody but that one. To strap somebody into 350 00:18:11,440 --> 00:18:13,679 Speaker 2: a race car, put them in. It's like night Rider. 351 00:18:13,720 --> 00:18:16,280 Speaker 2: They're in the back of a truck driving through the city. 352 00:18:16,600 --> 00:18:16,800 Speaker 2: I know. 353 00:18:16,880 --> 00:18:21,000 Speaker 1: It's what it's like all children's all children's dream, Uh, 354 00:18:21,080 --> 00:18:21,880 Speaker 1: in a race. 355 00:18:21,680 --> 00:18:23,000 Speaker 3: Car in the back of a truck. 356 00:18:23,160 --> 00:18:25,680 Speaker 2: Yeah. So yeah, then the like the ramps drop down, 357 00:18:25,720 --> 00:18:27,680 Speaker 2: the car back south, then you just gun it by 358 00:18:27,920 --> 00:18:30,399 Speaker 2: like that is like every little kid's dream if you 359 00:18:30,440 --> 00:18:31,400 Speaker 2: grew up in the eighties. 360 00:18:31,720 --> 00:18:32,160 Speaker 3: Exactly. 361 00:18:33,040 --> 00:18:35,800 Speaker 2: Okay, so the one and before I even I was 362 00:18:35,840 --> 00:18:37,800 Speaker 2: actually gonna do a completely different story that I'll do 363 00:18:37,840 --> 00:18:41,760 Speaker 2: in the next minisode. But one night in Brooklyn, you 364 00:18:41,840 --> 00:18:43,800 Speaker 2: weren't there, but it was we were definitely buds at 365 00:18:43,800 --> 00:18:46,320 Speaker 2: this time. There was It was a rainy, sleety night 366 00:18:46,520 --> 00:18:49,080 Speaker 2: and a girl that I kind of knew. I think 367 00:18:49,119 --> 00:18:51,000 Speaker 2: she went out with my friend Bryce a couple of times. 368 00:18:51,560 --> 00:18:53,800 Speaker 2: She was having a laft party at a Williamsburg loft 369 00:18:53,840 --> 00:18:57,400 Speaker 2: somewhere in South Williamsburg, and we go and we really 370 00:18:57,400 --> 00:18:59,879 Speaker 2: only knew her, but it was a really big party. 371 00:19:00,240 --> 00:19:02,520 Speaker 2: And the thing about New York parties that I'm sure 372 00:19:02,600 --> 00:19:05,000 Speaker 2: you miss and remember it is like when the weather's 373 00:19:05,040 --> 00:19:07,960 Speaker 2: crappy and you get there, it is so fun. You 374 00:19:08,040 --> 00:19:12,119 Speaker 2: peel those jackets off. You're not going anywhere, You're gonna 375 00:19:12,119 --> 00:19:15,639 Speaker 2: go hard. A lot of creative people. So I go. 376 00:19:15,720 --> 00:19:17,120 Speaker 2: I don't know anybody, but they had a photo booth 377 00:19:17,160 --> 00:19:19,400 Speaker 2: set up and they had a kazillion props. They had 378 00:19:19,440 --> 00:19:21,960 Speaker 2: so many props, you know they had. This was kind 379 00:19:21,960 --> 00:19:24,080 Speaker 2: of before that era of like here's a fake mustache 380 00:19:24,080 --> 00:19:26,760 Speaker 2: on a stick, or here's it. They just had incredible props. 381 00:19:26,760 --> 00:19:29,040 Speaker 2: Somebody must have worked in costuming. One of their props 382 00:19:29,080 --> 00:19:31,080 Speaker 2: was lays. They had a box of layers that was 383 00:19:31,080 --> 00:19:35,320 Speaker 2: as big as a refrigerator. So I proceed to drink 384 00:19:36,200 --> 00:19:40,720 Speaker 2: just about my maximum level, and at two am or so, 385 00:19:41,160 --> 00:19:44,639 Speaker 2: everybody's like, let's walk to a bar. And I said 386 00:19:44,720 --> 00:19:47,679 Speaker 2: to Bryce, I'm like, I am so drunk. I'm like, 387 00:19:47,760 --> 00:19:50,719 Speaker 2: there's no way I can keep going. I'm just gonna 388 00:19:50,760 --> 00:19:52,840 Speaker 2: pass out here on this food ton. He's like you sure. 389 00:19:53,160 --> 00:19:54,399 Speaker 2: I was like yeah. He's like, can I take your 390 00:19:54,480 --> 00:19:56,280 Speaker 2: rain jacket? I'm like, you got it. Have fun. I'll 391 00:19:56,280 --> 00:19:58,280 Speaker 2: meet you back here in a couple hours. So I 392 00:19:58,440 --> 00:20:02,040 Speaker 2: pass out in a stranger's law and the whole entire 393 00:20:02,040 --> 00:20:07,640 Speaker 2: party leaves except for me. I wake up probably three 394 00:20:07,720 --> 00:20:11,840 Speaker 2: or four hours later. I am one hundred percent covered 395 00:20:11,840 --> 00:20:16,040 Speaker 2: in flowers. They had broken every lay and buried me 396 00:20:16,520 --> 00:20:19,960 Speaker 2: like a pile of leaves, in colorful, rainbow colored flowers. 397 00:20:20,400 --> 00:20:23,080 Speaker 2: And so I opened my eyes and I'm like, all 398 00:20:23,080 --> 00:20:25,720 Speaker 2: I can see is colors at like blurred colors. I 399 00:20:25,720 --> 00:20:27,600 Speaker 2: look like the end of Midsummer If no, if you've 400 00:20:27,600 --> 00:20:29,800 Speaker 2: seen the movie, I looked like her only cover her 401 00:20:29,920 --> 00:20:31,480 Speaker 2: entire face with twenty lays. 402 00:20:31,760 --> 00:20:35,480 Speaker 1: When you said box of lays, I thought you meant 403 00:20:35,520 --> 00:20:36,920 Speaker 1: potato chips. 404 00:20:36,800 --> 00:20:41,639 Speaker 2: No lays, Oh sorry, Hawaii floral lays, silk, silk flowers. 405 00:20:41,920 --> 00:20:44,040 Speaker 2: So so they had cut They had come back from 406 00:20:44,080 --> 00:20:47,080 Speaker 2: the bar and I was just knocked out drunk. They 407 00:20:47,119 --> 00:20:50,919 Speaker 2: had cut two hundred lays fifty lays. I don't know 408 00:20:50,920 --> 00:20:53,360 Speaker 2: what it takes to bury a grown man under a fouton. 409 00:20:54,400 --> 00:20:56,200 Speaker 2: Then the party had ended, like at some point everybody 410 00:20:56,240 --> 00:20:58,240 Speaker 2: just went to bed. Everybody left. But the other detail 411 00:20:58,320 --> 00:21:00,560 Speaker 2: is they had moved the TV that I guess was 412 00:21:00,600 --> 00:21:03,480 Speaker 2: on rollers or wheels up to my face and put 413 00:21:03,680 --> 00:21:07,400 Speaker 2: a porno on and mute it. So I wake up, 414 00:21:07,680 --> 00:21:11,520 Speaker 2: brush flowers, open my eyes, and then there's just graphic 415 00:21:11,600 --> 00:21:15,360 Speaker 2: penetration porn having directly in front of my face. I'm 416 00:21:15,400 --> 00:21:18,560 Speaker 2: not one hundred percent sure where I am. I looked down. 417 00:21:18,760 --> 00:21:20,879 Speaker 2: My shoes are tied together, so they had tied my 418 00:21:20,920 --> 00:21:26,480 Speaker 2: shoelaces together, so I gently untied my shoes, brushed myself off, 419 00:21:26,640 --> 00:21:29,159 Speaker 2: like I put all the flowers, the silk flowers back on, 420 00:21:29,200 --> 00:21:32,320 Speaker 2: the foods on, turned the porn off, and then Bryce 421 00:21:32,359 --> 00:21:34,119 Speaker 2: had my rain jacket. So then I just had to 422 00:21:34,160 --> 00:21:37,160 Speaker 2: walk to the subway at five am in the rain, 423 00:21:38,160 --> 00:21:40,040 Speaker 2: no and then just ride that F train or that 424 00:21:40,080 --> 00:21:43,879 Speaker 2: G train home miserably. But it was like the greatest 425 00:21:43,920 --> 00:21:47,639 Speaker 2: way to wake up and also so alarming. It was 426 00:21:47,960 --> 00:21:48,680 Speaker 2: so bizarre. 427 00:21:49,880 --> 00:21:54,520 Speaker 1: Oh my god, that is like just a perfect party. 428 00:21:54,640 --> 00:21:57,800 Speaker 1: What like it was what a great way to end 429 00:21:57,880 --> 00:22:01,119 Speaker 1: your experience. I've that's the best way to wake up. Like, 430 00:22:01,160 --> 00:22:04,320 Speaker 1: that's like it was at a night I had a night. 431 00:22:04,359 --> 00:22:06,760 Speaker 2: They didn't draw dicks on my face. They didn't put 432 00:22:06,960 --> 00:22:09,080 Speaker 2: hot sauce I don't know in my eyes or up 433 00:22:09,119 --> 00:22:12,240 Speaker 2: my butt or something. They just left me alone, but 434 00:22:12,400 --> 00:22:15,840 Speaker 2: buried me in beautiful flowers like some weird art installation. 435 00:22:16,160 --> 00:22:19,239 Speaker 2: And then we're like, leave him alone. This one. He 436 00:22:19,359 --> 00:22:21,760 Speaker 2: earned it tonight, and I have some photos. I'll try 437 00:22:21,800 --> 00:22:25,120 Speaker 2: to find photos of the photo booth earlier where I'm 438 00:22:25,160 --> 00:22:27,840 Speaker 2: like wearing lays and like you can tell them twenty 439 00:22:27,840 --> 00:22:28,720 Speaker 2: sheets to the wind. 440 00:22:28,840 --> 00:22:32,000 Speaker 1: So god, Oh I love it, man, you did it. 441 00:22:32,119 --> 00:22:34,359 Speaker 1: I love that one so much, Scottie, we did it. 442 00:22:34,400 --> 00:22:36,200 Speaker 1: That's the end of the miniesod. 443 00:22:35,840 --> 00:22:38,600 Speaker 2: Pal love the minisodes. Thank you for sending in these 444 00:22:38,640 --> 00:22:42,240 Speaker 2: great stories. Send them to our The Bananas Podcast at 445 00:22:42,280 --> 00:22:46,040 Speaker 2: Instagram or Gmail The Bananas Podcast at Gmail, or text 446 00:22:46,080 --> 00:22:47,840 Speaker 2: them to me on the Banana Phone. We still have 447 00:22:47,880 --> 00:22:51,040 Speaker 2: the Banana Phone. Two one three two one four seven 448 00:22:51,200 --> 00:23:02,360 Speaker 2: nine seven four. Thank you guys, Bananas. This has been 449 00:23:02,400 --> 00:23:04,400 Speaker 2: an exactly right production. 450 00:23:04,160 --> 00:23:07,600 Speaker 3: Produced and engineered by Katie Levine, the music by Kahan, 451 00:23:07,880 --> 00:23:10,240 Speaker 3: and all of our artwork is done by Travis Millard. 452 00:23:10,440 --> 00:23:13,160 Speaker 2: You can follow us on Instagram at the Bananas Podcast, 453 00:23:13,200 --> 00:23:15,359 Speaker 2: where we post stories every day and things that we 454 00:23:15,400 --> 00:23:16,840 Speaker 2: don't cover on the podcast. 455 00:23:17,240 --> 00:23:20,480 Speaker 1: Listen, subscribe, and please leave us a review on Apple podcast, 456 00:23:20,520 --> 00:23:22,440 Speaker 1: Stitcher or wherever you get your podcast. 457 00:23:22,760 --> 00:23:25,840 Speaker 2: And if you're interested in advertising on Bananas, please email 458 00:23:25,920 --> 00:23:28,800 Speaker 2: us at the Bananas Podcast at gmail dot com. That's 459 00:23:28,960 --> 00:23:40,760 Speaker 2: the Bananas Podcast at gmail dot com. Try by