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Speaker 1: This is the Fread Show.

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Speaker 2: Kelly Clarksony is returning to Las Vegas in twenty twenty

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Speaker 2: six for her studio Sessions Las Vegas Residency. You can

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Speaker 2: enter now for a chance to win a trip for

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Speaker 2: two to the July twenty fourth show, a two night

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Speaker 2: hotels day at Flamingo Hotel and Casino in Las Vegas

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Speaker 2: July twenty third through the twenty fifth, and round trip airfare.

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Speaker 2: Text Beautiful to five seven, seven three nine right now

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Speaker 2: for a chance to win. A confirmation text will be sent.

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Speaker 2: Standard message and data rates may apply. All thanks to

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Speaker 2: Live Nation. The Fread Show is on. It's stay or

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Speaker 2: go people, we're emailing over the weekend. How would I

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Speaker 2: tell you my stay or ghost story? Well, just like that,

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Speaker 2: if you emailed us, then you can tell us right there.

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Speaker 1: No good, wait, that's fine.

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Speaker 2: Frencherradio dot com. You can dm us on all the

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Speaker 2: different socials. It's the frend Show. Find us there. Hey Claudia,

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Speaker 2: good morning, Welcome clamb Oh hi, oh hi, hi Cylia?

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Speaker 2: How you doing? You know I had an obvious place?

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Speaker 2: Oh boy, someone's upset that. Someone's very upset about your scenario,

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Speaker 2: your situation here.

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Speaker 1: Yes, I'm babysitting. That's all good.

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Speaker 2: So you you were recently proposed to, and that's very exciting. Congratulations,

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Speaker 2: But there's there's trouble in the water, isn't there.

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Speaker 3: There's trouble in the water.

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Speaker 1: I was.

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Speaker 3: I was super excited to get proposed to, and I

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Speaker 3: said yes, but I my friends kind of held an

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Speaker 3: intervention with me after it happened. I told them and

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Speaker 3: I really wanted them to be excited for me, but

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Speaker 3: they told me not.

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Speaker 1: To go through with it.

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Speaker 3: They said it was going to be a mistake.

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Speaker 1: Well that's away was inspiring.

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Speaker 2: You know, you get proposed to, it's like, you know,

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Speaker 2: one of the best moments of your life, and then

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Speaker 2: only for everyone to tell you not to do it. Now,

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Speaker 2: why would your friends not want your little friend? Why

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Speaker 2: would the Peanut gallery not want you to do this?

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Speaker 2: I got to think if they all came together, that

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Speaker 2: there's a danger.

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Speaker 3: I guess I'm not surprised because I did tell them.

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Speaker 3: I told them about six months ago that I was

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Speaker 3: thinking about bringing up with them because I got him.

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Speaker 1: Cheating on me.

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Speaker 3: So they yeah, they they but but it was only

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Speaker 3: text messages like he didn't like go anywhere. But I

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Speaker 3: just caught him like texting someone and so anyway, it

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Speaker 3: wasn't good, but it wasn't like.

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Speaker 1: Horrible horrible, And I don't know.

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Speaker 3: I just he proposed and I really want to get married,

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Speaker 3: and I'm really I was really excited, and I don't

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Speaker 3: know what to do.

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Speaker 1: Well, who was he texting?

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Speaker 2: Like if he didn't, I didn't go anywhere like this,

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Speaker 2: someone somebody knew obviously he was.

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Speaker 3: He was texting someone from work, who I just I've

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Speaker 3: been a little suspicious about before. Just the way that

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Speaker 3: he's mentioned her was kind of has kind of been suspicious.

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Speaker 3: And then I saw that he was texting her and

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Speaker 3: it was just kind of of like crossing a line,

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Speaker 3: like just a little inappropriate.

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Speaker 2: A little inappropriate. I'm just trying to figure out sort

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Speaker 2: of the depth of this year. I mean, he he

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Speaker 2: violated your trust, which is, you know, sort of I

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Speaker 2: don't know if there's a level to that he was

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Speaker 2: doing something he shouldn't be doing, but I mean, we're

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Speaker 2: certain that he it was just some little flirty texting

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Speaker 2: or something like.

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Speaker 1: We're certain it didn't go any further. I mean, not

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Speaker 1: sure if it matters, but I'm pretty certain.

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Speaker 3: And the only thing is like they went on this

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Speaker 3: office retreat for a weekend.

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Speaker 1: Caused me a little bit suspicious. Yeah, anyone else want

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Speaker 1: this office retreat? Or was it just it wasn't just

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Speaker 1: the two of them?

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Speaker 3: Apparently it was the whole office, right, But I didn't

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Speaker 3: want that. They were texting a lot after that, and

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Speaker 3: so and your friends, I'm assuming are just like he's

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Speaker 3: not trustworthy or did they have any other issues with

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Speaker 3: him or what's the deal? They just are like if

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Speaker 3: he's not trustworthy and if he's already kind of.

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Speaker 1: Doing, they think that he's just doing.

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Speaker 3: So I confronted him about that, and he was pretty apologetic,

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Speaker 3: like he knew he crossed the line. And so they

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Speaker 3: think that he's just proposing to me so that I

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Speaker 3: don't break up with him.

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Speaker 1: What was the nature of the text messages?

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Speaker 2: Was it like you're cute you know on this office

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Speaker 2: retreat or was it like I want.

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Speaker 1: To do you? You know? It wasn't full on that.

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Speaker 3: It wasn't like she said something about like she had

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Speaker 3: she was getting a wax, and she just yeah, she

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Speaker 3: decided to tell him about.

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Speaker 1: Why why does he get a vote in the no

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Speaker 1: and I get a wax?

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Speaker 2: Why not I mean, Caitlyn does group chats like you

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Speaker 2: know what, you know, how should I?

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Speaker 1: That was one time you guys asked me to stop.

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Speaker 2: It's like a heart or you know, how should I

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Speaker 2: do it? But no, that's that's no, that's wildly inappropriate.

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Speaker 2: That's not like, that's why is she asking him about

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Speaker 2: grooming if it's not something that he has any jurisdiction over,

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Speaker 2: like if he's not going or even if he's not

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Speaker 2: doing that, she wants him thinking about that, And that's

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Speaker 2: not appropriate, Like, that's not flirty, that's like flat out.

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Speaker 1: Now let me ask you this.

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Speaker 2: Well, I guess he responded to it so mean because

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Speaker 2: people can't control the messages they get.

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Speaker 1: But if someone is that, don't smile at me.

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Speaker 2: Like.

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Speaker 1: We're both thinking the same way. Look, look, if.

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Speaker 2: I'm sitting, if I'm in my desk and you text

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Speaker 2: me something, the only choice I have is how I'm

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Speaker 2: going to respond to it. That being said, now let

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Speaker 2: me finish my thought. If you text me something like that,

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Speaker 2: then that means that we have a level of comfort

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Speaker 2: between us to where you think you can text me

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Speaker 2: something like that. Absolutely, But so I'm trying. I'm not

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Speaker 2: even giving this guy the benefit of the doubt. I mean,

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Speaker 2: I'm telling you it's inappropriate, but that's beyond that's not

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Speaker 2: just flirty, that's sexual. The baby is like, get out, mom,

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Speaker 2: get out to see your babysitting.

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Speaker 1: So he said you were ready to forgive him and

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Speaker 1: get married.

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Speaker 4: I mean, it's definitely something that has bothered me. But

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Speaker 4: he he apologized for it, and he told me, like

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Speaker 4: what the extent of it, which was it was just

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Speaker 4: like some inappropriate text messages, Like he was.

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Speaker 3: She was kind of like leading him on, like trying

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Speaker 3: to get him to talk about this sexual stuff. Were

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Speaker 3: you talking about marriage before this? I mean, I he

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Speaker 3: saw my Pinterest board.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, but he wasn't heard.

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Speaker 2: I didn't that, Like, he didn't seem to expertite things

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Speaker 2: when he thought maybe you'd leave him over this. Okay,

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Speaker 2: So eight five five, nine, one one three five is

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Speaker 2: the number you can call him. Text the same number,

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Speaker 2: you guys, I'd love to hear from everybody listening. So

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Speaker 2: this woman, Claudia caught her boyfriend texting with a coworker.

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Speaker 2: They went on a trip together, an office retreat, and

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Speaker 2: now she's asking.

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Speaker 1: About certain sort of waxing.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, intimate type questions and he apparently gets a vote

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Speaker 2: in that kind of thing, which the only time I've

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Speaker 2: ever gotten to vote in that kind of thing is

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Speaker 2: when I'm experiencing that kind of thing. So I don't

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Speaker 2: know otherwise why anybody would be talking to me about that,

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Speaker 2: or they were trying to get me to go to

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Speaker 2: that kind of thing.

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Speaker 3: Or maybe the retreat was somewhere tropical and she just

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Speaker 3: wanted to get her bikini line ready.

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Speaker 1: Or tropical even worse.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, that is not a normal coworker interaction, and especially

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Speaker 2: if this is a woman that you don't know and

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Speaker 2: there's no context. And I don't like any part of this,

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Speaker 2: and I don't, but then again, I mean, people cheat, Okay,

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Speaker 2: people do stupid things. People they realize their mistakes, they

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Speaker 2: do ask for forgiveness, and some people are able to

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Speaker 2: change their behavior and realize what they did was wrong

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Speaker 2: and hurtful. I mean again, I'm playing the other side

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Speaker 2: of this. I don't think I could get over it

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Speaker 2: me personally, but I'm also a relatively unforgiving person, and

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Speaker 2: I hold grudges ever my whole life forever. I'll never forget,

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Speaker 2: and that's not healthy. So I mean, is there any

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Speaker 2: way in which he can have redeemed himself over the

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Speaker 2: last six months and into the future and then they

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Speaker 2: can work this out. Is it absolutely he's got to go?

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Speaker 2: Is there zero forgiveness? Is there zero room for error here?

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Speaker 1: We're not forgiving?

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Speaker 5: Okay, yeah, forget We're not there. I guys know that

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Speaker 5: I have a very hard time with that. Again, that's

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Speaker 5: my experience what I would do. But I do feel

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Speaker 5: like he is trying to marry you, and I'm sorry, Claudia,

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Speaker 5: because he's afraid that you're going to leave or wake

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Speaker 5: up and realize that this company retreat is not which

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Speaker 5: thought it was.

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Speaker 1: They were retreating.

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Speaker 2: All right, Yes, Claudia, I'm gonna take some phone calls

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Speaker 2: and go through these sex here. But I have the

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Speaker 2: radio on and I wish you the very best idea.

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Speaker 6: Beck you mix, Thank you, guys.

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Speaker 1: Sorry, I have a good Yeah, I don't.

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Speaker 2: I don't like it. I don't like it. I don't

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Speaker 2: know how you recover from this.

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Speaker 1: You don't you leave? But again, I mean there's.

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Speaker 2: There's people do screw up, and people do forgive and

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Speaker 2: move forward.

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Speaker 7: As possible. I think it's just you have to decide

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Speaker 7: if that's what you want to do, and if that's

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Speaker 7: what you want to do, then you need to commit

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Speaker 7: to that and you need to actually forgive instead of

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Speaker 7: just holding it against them for the rest of your life.

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Speaker 2: But none of her friends want her to do this.

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Speaker 2: They all came together, and in fairness, I mean, you

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Speaker 2: can call up here about anything you want, but she's

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Speaker 2: calling us for validation. She's hoping. I think that people

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Speaker 2: are going to tell her one way or the other

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Speaker 2: what to do. So I don't think she's sure about

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Speaker 2: this either, because if she were, then she would just say, look,

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Speaker 2: the guy screwed up. You know, there's there's more context

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Speaker 2: here that you know, the ups and downs of relationships.

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Speaker 2: He wasn't feeling whatever his excuse me, It doesn't make

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Speaker 2: it right. But it's up to her to decide if

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Speaker 2: she's going to forgive him. It's not up to the

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Speaker 2: friend group, it's not up to us. But she's still

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Speaker 2: looking for someone to tell her to do it. But

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Speaker 2: did he that tells you every years?

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Speaker 8: Did he go to HR about the wax text, like,

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Speaker 8: you know, like he needs to leave his job or

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Speaker 8: something if he's so serious about this, because.

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Speaker 1: Now you're still going on to retreats no, I think

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Speaker 1: I think you're right.

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Speaker 2: I do think some drastic change would be Like, if

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Speaker 2: you want me to commit to you for life, then

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Speaker 2: I think we're going to have to do something. We're

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Speaker 2: the exposure to this person who apparently doesn't matter. I

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Speaker 2: do think something and that sounds drastic, but I do

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Speaker 2: think something like that would be necessary.

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Speaker 3: Yes.

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Speaker 5: Also, if you think, like all your friends coming together again.

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Speaker 5: I know there's always that one little hater friend or whatever,

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Speaker 5: but if all your friends come together, people who truly

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Speaker 5: love you and are telling you on the same page,

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Speaker 5: they're on the same you know whatever, being like this

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Speaker 5: isn't the right relationship for you, Like, don't get married

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Speaker 5: to this man, do not do it?

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Speaker 1: Everybody? Everybody, everybody, Hey, Telly, Hey, what's up? Good morning?

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Speaker 1: How you doing stare go.

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Speaker 9: Go?

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Speaker 2: Definitely you're not liking this office retreat, are you? I

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Speaker 2: want to know who else was retreating right and.

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Speaker 1: Where it was? It was an office retreat exactly, and

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Speaker 1: I mean there are there is such a thing. I

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Speaker 1: have heard of the happening well.

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Speaker 9: I mean I've heard of couple's retreat, but office retreat,

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Speaker 9: I mean.

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Speaker 2: Was listening at a hedonism and Jamaica or something like

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Speaker 2: I want to know where you win. It was this iss,

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Speaker 2: I want to know where you win. No, it does exist.

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Speaker 2: There are like off sites and things where big companies

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Speaker 2: go and do trainings and things like that, or they'll

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Speaker 2: do like team building. It does happen. Now, we don't

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Speaker 2: have the budget for anything like that. I mean, they

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Speaker 2: would never happen here.

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Speaker 1: You never heard of.

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Speaker 5: Like trainings, you know, but an office retreat like come.

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Speaker 9: On, they were really retreating themselves.

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Speaker 2: I mean, and again flirty texts like I don't know,

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Speaker 2: but like the comfort to be asking about that kind

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Speaker 2: of thing that that really says that there's more here

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Speaker 2: to this story. Thank you, Telly, have a good day.

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Speaker 9: Thank you.

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Speaker 2: We are all very close around here, and we know

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Speaker 2: a lot of things about each other, but I don't

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Speaker 2: those those kind of text messages don't fly. Mean, Kiky's

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Speaker 2: always asking me, But other than that, that's different though,

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Speaker 2: Hey Ariel, yes, Hey, good morning, Stay or go?

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Speaker 9: What do you think she should leave?

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Speaker 6: She should start by leaving him as she can't even

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Speaker 6: convince herself that it didn't happen. And on top of that,

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Speaker 6: stop sharing your relationship drama with other people that aren't

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Speaker 6: a licensed therapist. When you do that, you then invite

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Speaker 6: and taint their views of the relationship. And you're not

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Speaker 6: in a relationship with your friends, So don't share your

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Speaker 6: relationship issues if you don't want them to be tainted.

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Speaker 1: I'm always I'm mixed on that.

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Speaker 2: Like I'm mixed because I do agree with you about

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Speaker 2: Like when you get in a fight with like a

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Speaker 2: trivial fight with someone you're taking, and then you go

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Speaker 2: and you tell your friends about this trivial fight, and

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Speaker 2: you're bound to tell your side of the story. It's

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Speaker 2: probably not a balanced story, because that's why you go

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Speaker 2: to your friends. It's I mean, for advice. But let's

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Speaker 2: face it, most of the time when we're recounting a fight,

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Speaker 2: we're recounting our version of events, not the neutral version

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Speaker 2: of events. And then your friends, their opinion of this

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Speaker 2: person is becomes class because they're hearing what you tell them.

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Speaker 2: They love you, probably more than the other person whatever. So,

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Speaker 2: but but this is more than trivial, Like, this is

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Speaker 2: fundamentally bad.

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Speaker 1: So, I mean, this is wrong.

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Speaker 6: She can't convince herself that it's not wrong. She needs

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Speaker 6: to leave.

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Speaker 1: Well, she works more than that.

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Speaker 6: I don't care who she is, she's worked more than that.

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Speaker 2: There you go, Ariel, thank you have a good day. No, Like,

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Speaker 2: if if you get in little fights with people and

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Speaker 2: then you run and tell your friends you know this stuff,

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Speaker 2: then that's going to cloud your friends opinions of this person.

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Speaker 2: That's not fair because then you know, you may you

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Speaker 2: may have told a more drastic version of events, and

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Speaker 2: then you get over it and forgive them, and then

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Speaker 2: your friends don't because they're they're more invested in you,

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Speaker 2: or his friends don't because they're more invested in him,

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Speaker 2: and now everyone's got this tainted opinion. So I agree that, like,

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Speaker 2: if you're gonna you can go to your friends whatever

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Speaker 2: you want, but you have to realize that when you're

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Speaker 2: telling them things, they're going to remember and hold on

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Speaker 2: to them. I've held on to things that my friends

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Speaker 2: have let go of, and I'm still bitter about it,

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Speaker 2: and I don't know that I have a right to be.

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Speaker 2: But but at the time, the way the story was

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Speaker 2: told to me, my friend was violated, you know. But

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Speaker 2: then they forget, and then I'm supposed to just forget

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Speaker 2: about it, you know what I mean. But like in

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Speaker 2: a case like cheating or in a case where everybody's

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Speaker 2: coming together and being like, hey, this is bad for you.

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Speaker 2: I think you have to trust that. So that's where

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Speaker 2: I'm in the middle on like how much you share

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Speaker 2: with people, because you may choose to move on, your

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Speaker 2: friends may not.

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Speaker 6: You have to know who you can go to, Like

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Speaker 6: there are there are friends that will not judge you.

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Speaker 1: I mean, I'd like to think I'm one of those friends.

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Speaker 3: I would not be able to survive without my group

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Speaker 3: of girlfriends to lean on for support. So I have

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Speaker 3: to disagree, But you can't tell the judge person.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I think it can be I think it depends

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Speaker 2: on the situation.

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Speaker 1: It can be hard.

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Speaker 2: Hey Linda, Hi, Linda, Linda, there's only okay, there's only

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Speaker 2: one Linda mom, Like, we get a special number for you,

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Speaker 2: Linda Jason's mom. So it's their going. And this woman's

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Speaker 2: calling because six months ago her boyfriend and she caught

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Speaker 2: him in some very inappropriate text message conversations with someone

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Speaker 2: and now he's proposing wants to get married. All of

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Speaker 2: her friends are saying, do not do this. Hey, Jessica, Hi, Hi,

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Speaker 2: say or go.

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Speaker 1: I'm gonna give you a final word.

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Speaker 9: What do you think I think she should go Okay,

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Speaker 9: why Well, when she was telling this her situation, right,

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Speaker 9: she mentioned that she just wanted to get married. She

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Speaker 9: didn't emphasize that she wants to get married to him,

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Speaker 9: which tells me she's settling for whoever's going to propose

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Speaker 9: to her.

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Speaker 2: That is an interesting that is true. She did say

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Speaker 2: she just wants to be married, So maybe she's in

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Speaker 2: that phase where she's invested enough in this person and

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Speaker 2: it's like, I don't want to have to start over

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Speaker 2: and write. So maybe she's settling and she's accepting this

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Speaker 2: poor behavior.

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Speaker 9: The issue is, though she has friends are looking out

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Speaker 9: for her, it's better to get out now than to

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Speaker 9: be stuck in a marriage where this person could potentially

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Speaker 9: do this again, simply just to say that he's her husband, Like.

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Speaker 1: Why get married now? Even if you want to see

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Speaker 1: it oether and work on it. What's the rush to

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Speaker 1: get married?

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Speaker 8: In my opinion?

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Speaker 2: You know, well he's trying to say face, look, see,

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Speaker 2: I'm totally committed. See so like I mean you no,

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Speaker 2: look see, but you're like, it's almost like you're throwing

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Speaker 2: gas in the fire here if you don't work through it,

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Speaker 2: because it's just gonna compound everything and make everything seem

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Speaker 2: more intense. It's like when people have a baby when

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Speaker 2: they're fighting, like, I'm gonna let's have a baby, Like, dude, it.

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Speaker 1: Doesn't fix it, right, that'll fix us? Like, No, he

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Speaker 1: needs change, right, Yeah, he needs to get a cd in.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, Jessica, I don't know. I think Jessica's having two conversations.

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Speaker 2: I gotta go Jessica. She's a very talented person. She

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Speaker 2: can talk to her coworkers to talk to us. A

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Speaker 2: CDL that'll solve things.

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Speaker 8: Yes, he need to go figure out something.

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Speaker 1: Nobody on the CDL school, nobody does that.

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Speaker 8: No, I'm just saying he needs to change careers. If

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Speaker 8: he's so serious about, you know, moving on and moving

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Speaker 8: to their future, don't marry me. Go figure out your

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Speaker 8: next career path and make sure you don't get that one.

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Speaker 2: I think Trump drivers will act. That's I mean, that's

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Speaker 2: that's what I hear. Suit Yeah, Hiant