WEBVTT - Bed Bugs - 9.14.26

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<v Speaker 1>It's time for the nephew and today's prank phone call. Nephew,

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<v Speaker 1>what you got for us?

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<v Speaker 2>This right here, Shirley, this is bed bugs. You know,

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<v Speaker 2>nobody wants bed bugs. This is bed bugs. But let

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<v Speaker 2>me tell you about these bed bugs. I'm just going

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<v Speaker 2>to break it down for y'all. See, it wouldn't be

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<v Speaker 2>so bad, you know, but the lady I'm messing with,

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<v Speaker 2>I'm finding out.

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<v Speaker 1>See, I'm calling her husband. You understand?

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<v Speaker 3>Yeah.

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<v Speaker 2>Because she bringing bed bugs from over there to my house.

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<v Speaker 2>Now you done messed my bed up. You see what

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<v Speaker 2>I'm saying? Now I got to get a new mattress.

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<v Speaker 2>Somebody going to pay for this here. Somebody going to

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<v Speaker 2>pay for this.

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<v Speaker 1>You're going to die today.

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<v Speaker 2>No, no, no. This is what we're doing. And listen,

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<v Speaker 2>don't be starting to talk. I don't want to hear

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<v Speaker 2>about what's going on with me and Hunt. That ain't

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<v Speaker 2>the subject at hand. The subject is the bedbugs.

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<v Speaker 1>The bedbugs. That's the problem. And your nasty magic.

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<v Speaker 2>Let's stay focused on your wife bringing these bedbugs over here.

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<v Speaker 1>What's up, Junior? Let me ask you something. Because I'm

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<v Speaker 1>concerned now.

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<v Speaker 3>About what?

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<v Speaker 1>Do you really realize how stupid you is? Do you

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<v Speaker 1>really realize that Do you know that? How stupid you are.

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<v Speaker 4>Uh-huh.

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<v Speaker 3>Uh-huh.

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<v Speaker 1>Tell him, Cheryl.

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<v Speaker 4>I can't. I'm just, I can't.

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<v Speaker 1>I said yes. That's it.

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<v Speaker 3>Yeah.

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<v Speaker 1>Do you know it?

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<v Speaker 4>Yes.

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<v Speaker 1>Yes.

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<v Speaker 3>Okay.

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<v Speaker 1>You can't just call these people like this and not

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<v Speaker 1>be stupid. What is that? What about any right frame

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<v Speaker 1>of mind prank people? This is what I'll do. Let's go,

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<v Speaker 1>cat dog. Bad bugs it is, baby. Bad bugs.

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<v Speaker 4>Hello? Hello, I'm trying to speak to Shanice.

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<v Speaker 3>She's not here right now.

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<v Speaker 4>I'm trying to take a message. Do you know when

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<v Speaker 4>she's coming back?

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<v Speaker 3>Nah, is this a business call or something?

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<v Speaker 4>Nah, nah, this is personal. I need to talk to

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<v Speaker 4>her immediately.

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<v Speaker 3>Nah, you need to talk to me. This is a man.

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<v Speaker 4>Who is this? This is Brandon. Who are you?

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<v Speaker 3>I'm Ernest, man, but why do you know Shanice?

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<v Speaker 4>I got a bit of a situation here, man, and

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<v Speaker 4>it's basically a financial situation. that I'm owed some money

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<v Speaker 4>from her. So I kind of need to talk to

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<v Speaker 4>her about getting this money. It's totally disrupted my whole apartment,

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<v Speaker 4>and I need to actually see about talking to her

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<v Speaker 4>about getting this whole problem taken care of.

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<v Speaker 3>What's the situation? What's going on?

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<v Speaker 4>I mean, I'm basically, right now, I'm $ 2, 500 in the

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<v Speaker 4>rears due to Shanice. And... You know, I need to

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<v Speaker 4>see if she's going to be able to pay me

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<v Speaker 4>for the situation or what, you know?

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<v Speaker 3>Does my girl owe you money?

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<v Speaker 4>She owes me $ 2, 500. $ 2, 500 for what?

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<v Speaker 3>I don't even know who you are, first of all.

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<v Speaker 3>So what's up with the $ 2, 500?

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<v Speaker 4>First of all, my name is Brandon, okay? And I've

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<v Speaker 4>been knowing Shanice probably for the last three or four

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<v Speaker 4>months now, okay? So you want to know it all

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<v Speaker 4>in a nutshell is like this. So I need to

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<v Speaker 4>be coming through, okay, for the last three or four months,

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<v Speaker 4>been coming over here to my spot, to my apartment,

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<v Speaker 4>hanging out. I'm just now finding out, within the last

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<v Speaker 4>two weeks, I had to get rid of my couch.

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<v Speaker 4>I had to get rid of my mattresses because... Your mattress?

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<v Speaker 4>Because it's bad for.

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<v Speaker 3>Your mattress?

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<v Speaker 4>Wait a minute, dude. Wait a minute.

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<v Speaker 3>So you're trying to tell me she was in your bed?

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<v Speaker 4>Yeah, she's been in my bed, dude.

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<v Speaker 3>She's been in your bed. Are you crazy? Hey, man.

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<v Speaker 3>Come on now, dude.

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<v Speaker 4>You know, the problem is not where she's been.

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<v Speaker 3>You're talking about $ 2, 500.

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<v Speaker 4>The problem is.

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<v Speaker 3>You're talking about $ 2, 500. You're talking about my girl was

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<v Speaker 3>in your bed. Now, we're not even going to get

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<v Speaker 3>into that. You understand what I'm saying? But that $ 2, 500,

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<v Speaker 3>you can forget about it.

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<v Speaker 4>No, no, no, no, no. Hold up.

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<v Speaker 3>First of all, you call in here. You call in here.

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<v Speaker 3>You call in here, and here is the dude answering

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<v Speaker 3>the phone, and you still got the... To ask for

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<v Speaker 3>her and then go tell me about some $ 2, 500 about

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<v Speaker 3>some mattress?

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<v Speaker 4>Dude, my mattresses, man, are $ 1, 000. They're full of bad bugs.

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<v Speaker 4>I had to throw that away.

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<v Speaker 3>Man, I'm not worried about no mattress, dude. You're talking

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<v Speaker 3>about my girl. We've been together for four years. I'm

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<v Speaker 3>about to pop the question on her, and you want

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<v Speaker 3>to sit there and talk about she been hanging with

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<v Speaker 3>you or kicking with you for the last four months.

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<v Speaker 3>It's about to be over in a minute.

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<v Speaker 4>If you want to marry Shanice, cool. I don't care.

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<v Speaker 4>Nothing about that.

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<v Speaker 3>Don't even worry about that now. I was going to

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<v Speaker 3>talk about some mattress, man. That's a problem, dude. I

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<v Speaker 3>ain't worried about no mattress.

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<v Speaker 4>I ain't got no mattress right now. You calling my house?

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<v Speaker 3>You calling mine?

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<v Speaker 4>I do not have a mattress right now, nor do

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<v Speaker 4>I have a couch. Do you understand the problem that

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<v Speaker 4>brings me?

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<v Speaker 3>I don't care about your mattress or couch, dude. I

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<v Speaker 3>don't care nothing about that. Your name, you say your

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<v Speaker 3>name Brandon?

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<v Speaker 4>I'm Brandon, yes.

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<v Speaker 3>Yeah, Brandon, okay. Don't worry about it, Brandon, because you're

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<v Speaker 3>going to find me real soon. Don't let me find

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<v Speaker 3>you before you find me, though. You understand what I'm saying,

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<v Speaker 3>don't you? Do, do, do. You can have them bedbugs

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<v Speaker 3>and that mattress or whatever. Answer these for all I care.

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<v Speaker 3>But what I'm saying is, you're talking about some bedbugs.

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<v Speaker 3>Ain't no bedbugs over here.

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<v Speaker 4>Okay, so what, she didn't bring nothing over there, first

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<v Speaker 4>of all, but that ain't even a problem right now. Dude,

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<v Speaker 4>you called me over here, man. I ain't got nobody

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<v Speaker 4>else over here.

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<v Speaker 3>Don't worry about who you had over there, but you

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<v Speaker 3>don't call here and talk about no money. You ain't

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<v Speaker 3>getting nothing from here.

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<v Speaker 4>Okay, first of all, dude, check this out. I don't

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<v Speaker 4>have a problem with you, okay? Me and you cool.

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<v Speaker 3>No, we got a problem. We already got a problem.

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<v Speaker 3>You calling me talking about you been sleeping with my brother.

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<v Speaker 4>Hey, dog, dog, I'm going to say it again. Me

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<v Speaker 4>and you cool, dog. We cool.

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<v Speaker 3>We not cool. We not cool. First of all, I'm

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<v Speaker 3>going to find out who you are. I'm going to

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<v Speaker 3>handle Sinise myself. I'm going to handle you later.

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<v Speaker 4>What you talking about? You gonna handle me.

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<v Speaker 3>I'm gonna handle you later. You want a mattress, right?

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<v Speaker 4>Hey, dude. You want a mattress, right? Marry Shanice. I

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<v Speaker 4>ain't got nothing to do with that. My problem is

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<v Speaker 4>getting my money back, man, for the property of mine

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<v Speaker 4>that she has ruined, man.

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<v Speaker 3>Don't worry about that. I'm gonna get you a mattress.

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<v Speaker 3>Don't worry about that. It's gonna be a casket wrapped

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<v Speaker 3>around that.

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<v Speaker 4>Hey, dude, dude, why are you sitting here creating a

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<v Speaker 4>drama with me when me and you, we ain't even

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<v Speaker 4>the problem. The problem is Shanice.

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<v Speaker 3>The problem is you picked up your phone and you

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<v Speaker 3>called here. That's the problem. Now you got two problems.

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<v Speaker 3>You ain't got no couch. You ain't got no mattress.

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<v Speaker 3>Now you got to do that. Do you understand what

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<v Speaker 3>I'm saying?

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<v Speaker 4>You know what? See, I can't talk to you. When

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<v Speaker 4>do Shanice get home, man?

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<v Speaker 3>Don't worry about when Shanice get home. What you need

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<v Speaker 3>to worry about is when I find you.

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<v Speaker 4>Okay, so you going to have my money then when

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<v Speaker 4>you find me? Because I need my money.

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<v Speaker 3>Yeah, I'm going to have your money. I'm going to

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<v Speaker 3>have your mattress too. Please understand, you're going to be

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<v Speaker 3>resting real well.

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<v Speaker 4>Okay, okay. So let me ask you this here, man.

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<v Speaker 4>Shanice bring bed bugs over to my house. Leave them

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<v Speaker 4>all in my mattress. Leave them all on my couch

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<v Speaker 4>where I got to throw my stuff away. Where I'm

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<v Speaker 4>wrong at, man? Where I'm wrong?

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<v Speaker 3>I'm going to ask you straight up. Did you know

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<v Speaker 3>she had a man?

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<v Speaker 4>Say what?

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<v Speaker 3>Did you know she had a man?

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<v Speaker 4>What? I mean, kind of, kind of, sort of, but

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<v Speaker 4>not really, though.

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<v Speaker 3>It ain't no kind of, sort of, man. Either you

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<v Speaker 3>know she got a man or she don't got a man.

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<v Speaker 3>You knew she had a man, right? And you still

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<v Speaker 3>went and did it, right?

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<v Speaker 4>Hey, dog, I ain't got nothing to do with y'all, man.

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<v Speaker 4>I'm dealing with these bedbugs. You understand what I'm saying?

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<v Speaker 3>Dude, do you understand you messing up a four-year relationship?

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<v Speaker 3>You know how much time I put in with this woman?

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<v Speaker 4>Four years. Four years.

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<v Speaker 3>We about to get married. And you calling here with this.

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<v Speaker 4>When are y'all supposed to get married?

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<v Speaker 3>Don't worry about when we supposed to get married, man.

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<v Speaker 3>You messed that all up. What I'm trying to explain

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<v Speaker 3>to you is, dude, you calling here on some bedbug...

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<v Speaker 3>Which I know she ain't got nothing to do with,

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<v Speaker 3>but the fact that you told me that she was

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<v Speaker 3>over your house, in your bed, that's over. It's over now.

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<v Speaker 3>You understand what I'm saying? Now, when she get home,

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<v Speaker 3>I'm going to deal with that. You understand what I'm saying?

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<v Speaker 3>That's going to get dealt with. I'm walking up out

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<v Speaker 3>of here. But when I leave here, please believe my

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<v Speaker 3>next stop is to come find your ass. First of all,

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<v Speaker 3>how did you get the number to this apartment? That's

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<v Speaker 3>what I want to know.

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<v Speaker 4>Hey, dude, she gave me both numbers, the cell phone

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<v Speaker 4>number and the house number, and told me, you know,

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<v Speaker 4>if it's an emergency, call the house.

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<v Speaker 3>Okay, and this is an emergency?

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<v Speaker 4>Yeah, this is an emergency. I got bad luck, man.

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<v Speaker 3>Learn another emergency number. Learn 911, because when I come

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<v Speaker 3>knocking on your door, either you come out and you

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<v Speaker 3>handle it, or you better call the cops. You understand

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<v Speaker 3>what I'm trying to tell you?

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<v Speaker 4>Hey, man, do you think Tommy will pay for the

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<v Speaker 4>bed bugs?

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<v Speaker 3>Who is Tommy?

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<v Speaker 4>I'm just saying, do you think Tommy will pay for

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<v Speaker 4>the bed, bro?

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<v Speaker 3>Who the f * * * is Tommy?

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<v Speaker 4>Tommy, dog. Nephew Tommy from the Steve Harvey morning show. Ernest,

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<v Speaker 4>you just got pranked by your girl shot niece.

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<v Speaker 3>Man. Y'all, y'all. You all right, man?

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<v Speaker 4>It was over. It was over.

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<v Speaker 3>You understand what I'm telling you?

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<v Speaker 4>It was over.

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<v Speaker 1>And there you have it. Stupid coming to Roanoke. Roanoke,

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<v Speaker 1>get ready. September 26th, Saturday night. Oh, yeah.

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<v Speaker 2>Berglin Performing Arts Theater. Nephew coming to town. Tickets on

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<v Speaker 2>sale right now.

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<v Speaker 4>Yeah, yeah.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. All right.

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<v Speaker 1>I think you sold out on that one.

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<v Speaker 4>I think you did.

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<v Speaker 1>You're listening to the Steve Harvey Morning Show.