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Speaker 1: Hey, this is Sam.

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Speaker 2: This is John, your og Okay Storytime podcast host, and

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Speaker 2: we got.

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Speaker 3: Some delicious, juicy stories coming up.

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Speaker 4: But if you want to hear that deliciousness, you know,

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Speaker 4: just stick around for a two minute break with a

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Speaker 4: word from our sponsors.

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Speaker 5: I had to pretend a stranger was my daughter to scare.

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Speaker 4: Off a creep.

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Speaker 6: Oh no, well, good for you.

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Speaker 5: Well da go toa It's I'm Not Afraid of a

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Speaker 5: Scary Story Week on Okay Storytime Podcast, where we're uncovering

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Speaker 5: the most bone chilling encounters with weird neighbors and obsessive stalkers,

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Speaker 5: Tales that will have you wondering if that friendly face

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Speaker 5: next door is hiding something. If you're new here and

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Speaker 5: looking for the story, I live below a cult leader

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Speaker 5: and I fear I've angered her, just click the link

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Speaker 5: in the show notes description or search I'm Not Afraid

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Speaker 5: of a Scary Story Week, Okay Storytime. Wherever you get

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Speaker 5: your podcasts, let's dive into this one. I am currently

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Speaker 5: a UNI student and on Tuesday nights I come home

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Speaker 5: pretty late, not late enough that my parents would call

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Speaker 5: the police, but just missing the regular bus times. Anyway,

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Speaker 5: as luck would have it, I managed to catch the

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Speaker 5: very last bus one Tuesday night after getting to the station.

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Speaker 5: And typically it's nothing to be worried about. If you

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Speaker 5: keep to yourself and stick to safe looking people like

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Speaker 5: other UNI students, mothers, or the bus driver, you'll be

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Speaker 5: all right. By the way, this comes from Batman, and

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Speaker 5: if you want to submit your own stories, go to

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Speaker 5: the r slash Okay storytime separate it.

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Speaker 4: I'm Sophia, I'm Dakota, I'm.

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Speaker 5: Carly, and Op says, growing up in a dangerous country

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Speaker 5: and migrating to a much safer one hasn't rid me

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Speaker 5: of those instincts. And that night I got all bad

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Speaker 5: vibes and buzzy. Something was off about that evening, and

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Speaker 5: I didn't know what. We get to the main stop,

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Speaker 5: the shopping center, and I find out that the bus

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Speaker 5: has terminated its route. It's done for the night, thanks

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Speaker 5: a whole bus driver. Well, f it's dark, it's late,

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Speaker 5: I can't drive, my parents can't pick me up because

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Speaker 5: they're at yoga, and I'm too broke to afford a taxi,

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Speaker 5: so I decide to walk home. The exercise will be

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Speaker 5: good for me. From the shopping center, it would take

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Speaker 5: me a good twenty to thirty minutes to reach my

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Speaker 5: house if I power walked. When you leave the shop,

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Speaker 5: if you follow the road, there's a local Catholic school,

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Speaker 5: a public library, a public school, and a few bus

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Speaker 5: stops along the way. Near the library is a traffic intersection,

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Speaker 5: the most brightly lit area of this entire road, but

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Speaker 5: it's also a very small square. It's a joke. Honestly.

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Speaker 5: As I'm walking, it takes me less than a second

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Speaker 5: to realize how effing dark it was on that street.

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Speaker 6: An unsettling amount of darkness.

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Speaker 5: It was a bit creepy walking by the local Catholic

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Speaker 5: school with their massive effing crucifix in the middle of

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Speaker 5: a huge, massive land. In front of me is a

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Speaker 5: girl who looks about my age Asian, and she's walking

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Speaker 5: fairly quickly understandable from the corner of my eye. Across

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Speaker 5: the road, I see a man kind of half jogging,

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Speaker 5: half walking, and I'm not sure what he's up to,

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Speaker 5: but it was just weird. I kept an eye on

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Speaker 5: him and the girl. At the intersection. My friend is

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Speaker 5: there and he greets me enthusiastically, a hug and a

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Speaker 5: kiss on the cheek. He momentarily distracts me from the

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Speaker 5: weird running dude and the girl. Between my friend and

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Speaker 5: I greeting each other, I completely miss when the guy

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Speaker 5: crossed the street and is in my path. My friend

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Speaker 5: turns out to be a bad friend and just leaves,

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Speaker 5: even after I've told him about the weird dude.

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Speaker 2: Hey, some people will just really be out here, like

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Speaker 2: should dog eat dog? World out here? Wow, he's not

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Speaker 2: following me. Why do I have the cave?

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Speaker 5: If any of my male friends saw me walking alone

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Speaker 5: in the middle of the night and then I tell

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Speaker 5: them that there's a weird dude right over there, they

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Speaker 5: are not leaving me alone. That's crazy. I'm not far

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Speaker 5: from the creep and the girl now, but he's talking

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Speaker 5: to her. And if a guy has any common sense,

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Speaker 5: he will not speak to a girl or woman when

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Speaker 5: she's alone at night, because we've all heard the horror stories.

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Speaker 5: By this stage, I've quickened my pace into a sprint,

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Speaker 5: holding onto my backpack so that my laptop inside won't

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Speaker 5: make so much noise, and I'm assessing my very limited

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Speaker 5: options on how to save this poor woman. I'm a

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Speaker 5: very small, very unintimidating Asian girl, and the guy looked

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Speaker 5: taller the closer I got. I felt very tiny and

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Speaker 5: incredibly stupid for doing this because I was still kind

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Speaker 5: of far. But I have crazy good eyesight, and the

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Speaker 5: street lights were hitting his face so I could make

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Speaker 5: it out accurately enough in case I needed to identify him.

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Speaker 5: He was a white male, early thirties to forties, brown hair,

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Speaker 5: wearing glasses, striped long sleeve top and brown khakis.

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Speaker 6: He's the Zodiac.

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Speaker 5: His eyes were really big, though, kind of like that

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Speaker 5: face you make when someone surprises you with something particularly

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Speaker 5: scandalous and.

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Speaker 6: Come and you've been using a substance also.

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Speaker 5: That, and I come up with what was probably the

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Speaker 5: most stupidly brilliant plan I've ever concocted. I kind of

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Speaker 5: stand there, hoodie on feet apart, hands on my hips

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Speaker 5: and my best loudest impersonation of an older Filipino woman

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Speaker 5: getting mad at her child with the strongest accent.

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Speaker 4: I cook, who Where's.

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Speaker 5: I can't do that? Honestly, if I were a bit taller,

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Speaker 5: I might not have gotten away with this boy.

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Speaker 4: What are you doing?

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Speaker 7: Huh?

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Speaker 5: You were supposed to be home already and talking to

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Speaker 5: a boy hau and he's white?

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Speaker 4: Excuse me?

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Speaker 5: Look at me while I'm talking to you. I did

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Speaker 5: not raise you like this, and I don't remember exactly

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Speaker 5: word for word what I said, but I'm basically copying

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Speaker 5: whatever my mom says when she's angry with me.

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Speaker 3: This was perfect, This is perfect.

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Speaker 7: This was you assessed.

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Speaker 6: You're like, Okay, he's way too big and I'm way

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Speaker 6: too small?

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Speaker 5: Was I still?

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Speaker 4: He didn't get close?

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Speaker 6: I do. I get my mom angry.

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Speaker 3: Yep.

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Speaker 5: The entire time I'm yelling, I can see the guy

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Speaker 5: trying to inch away, and the girl looks so bewildered,

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Speaker 5: like a deer cotton headlights. At this stage, Honestly, I'm

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Speaker 5: expecting her to run away. I turned to the guy,

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Speaker 5: and where you think you're going? Huh? I will crush

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Speaker 5: your wiener. He effing ran like I swear, it was

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Speaker 5: like watching a cartoon. The girl was still standing there,

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Speaker 5: and I took off my hood and waved to her.

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Speaker 5: I was still far away and asked if she was

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Speaker 5: all right in my regular, not very Filipino accent. She

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Speaker 5: was just staring at me. I apologized if I scared her,

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Speaker 5: but I had to get him away because my younger

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Speaker 5: sister would tell me about a creepy guy that corners

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Speaker 5: young girls in the park not far from where we live. Anyway,

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Speaker 5: we hugged and exchange names and numbers, and now we're

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Speaker 5: basically friends forever.

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Speaker 6: Oh and that's how you make a best friend. Yeah,

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Speaker 6: so you pretend to be there.

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Speaker 5: Ye turns out that she doesn't live very far and

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Speaker 5: didn't even realize what was happening until she couldn't get

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Speaker 5: away from the creep I ended up walking her home,

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Speaker 5: and from there her older brother dropped me off. We

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Speaker 5: called the police while we walked to her place. I think,

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Speaker 5: just you know, if you're out and it's dark and

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Speaker 5: you see a girl, or just in any situation where

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Speaker 5: you see someone getting harassed, specifically young girls, because that's

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Speaker 5: usually you know who's getting harassed. But in any case,

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Speaker 5: please like, don't be the bystander. That's just like someone

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Speaker 5: else would do something. Please step in if you can,

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Speaker 5: because even if you're alone being together, you know you

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Speaker 5: have safety and numbers too, and step in for that person.

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Speaker 2: If you're not physically intimidating or capable enough. I will

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Speaker 2: always say crazy beats yeah crazy.

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Speaker 6: Every time you got it over crazy, I.

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Speaker 5: Think, oh, he did it amazingly didn't get close, got

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Speaker 5: a little crazy and it worked. So but yeah, if

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Speaker 5: you ever see someone like that and you are able

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Speaker 5: to step in, definitely do that. But there is a

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Speaker 5: little bit left. When we told the story to our

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Speaker 5: families at this stage, I'd correctly assumed they were Filipino

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Speaker 5: as well, so communication was easy. They banned us completely

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Speaker 5: from taking the bus past seven. Well. I think the

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Speaker 5: problem was that OPI didn't take the bus. I was

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Speaker 5: reluctant to tell my friends this because I knew they'd laugh.

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Speaker 5: But it was such a serious thing. What if I

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Speaker 5: wasn't there. As comical as that sounded, she was really

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Speaker 5: shook up, but very relieved and grateful. She kept hugging

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Speaker 5: me and stuff, which is weird. I don't usually hug strangers.

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Speaker 5: Police later stopped a nondescript station wagon about twenty minutes

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Speaker 5: down the main road, and it was a man matching

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Speaker 5: my description. They searched his car and found a few

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Speaker 5: photos of girls in the glove compartment and even more

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Speaker 5: on his phone. They were all Asian, specifically Filipino. Terrifying.

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Speaker 5: Months later, after I found out about this, Mom tells

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Speaker 5: me that they actually found photos of my sister.

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Speaker 6: And I Oh my god, it.

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Speaker 5: Made me shudder. If that cre ever came near my

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Speaker 5: little sister, I would f them up. That's scary. Common

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Speaker 5: one says carry something hard and weighty in your dominant hand.

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Speaker 5: Let's face it, most of us don't actually know how

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Speaker 5: to throw a good punch without damaging our hand. If

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Speaker 5: you have something to add some weight to your hand,

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Speaker 5: you can connect it to the side of an attacker's head,

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Speaker 5: preferably the temple region. Note do not the old one

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Speaker 5: to them with your knuckles, just swing it and hit

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Speaker 5: with the side of your closed fist.

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Speaker 6: Well why don't we just carry around in medieval broad swords?

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Speaker 5: Also that reply, Another self defense technique is to hit

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Speaker 5: with your palm as hard as you can upwards on

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Speaker 5: the nosetep.

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Speaker 7: That's not good.

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Speaker 2: If you want to get processed for homicide, Well you

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Speaker 2: know what, that's a strike?

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Speaker 6: Is what? That's a crasma god strike?

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Speaker 5: I think if someone is attacking you, you gotta do

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Speaker 5: whatever you can.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, well, if you're in California, you'll get prosecuted for murder.

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Speaker 2: So well it's better then no, it's worse. I don't

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Speaker 2: go to prison in California.

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Speaker 5: Yes, but also, like you don't want to.

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Speaker 2: No, I'm just saying there's other methods of self defense

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Speaker 2: that don't involve actually shoving someone's nose bridge into their brain.

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Speaker 4: Like carrying a broadsword.

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Speaker 2: By carrying a broadsword, you can mame with the broadsword.

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Speaker 2: You have options with the broadsword.

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Speaker 5: If you hit it right, you'll break the nose, and

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Speaker 5: no matter what it'll hurt, it'll be unbearably painful, and

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Speaker 5: then it just gives more. Knees, throat, crotch areas are

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Speaker 5: also good to go for, and hitting with your palm

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Speaker 5: is a good alternative to a fist. It won't hurt

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Speaker 5: you as much. Also, your knees and elbows are painful.

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Speaker 5: Aim for the nose, crotch, kidney's, stomach, side of knees

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Speaker 5: and poke and or scratch the eyes. Don't go down

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Speaker 5: without a fight, ladies, Opie says. I've accidentally hit my

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Speaker 5: brother in the throat whenever we fight over things and

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Speaker 5: it gets a little physical and he choks for a while.

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Speaker 5: Pretty good aria to go for. You're totally right about

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Speaker 5: the old one two in thing. I usually carry my

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Speaker 5: keys one key between my fingers in case I get

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Speaker 5: grabbed or I learned this from playing volleyball. Opening your

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Speaker 5: palm and hitting with the heel of it is pretty good.

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Speaker 5: It's the strongest part of your hand and it only

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Speaker 5: stings for a little bit of anything. It's never good

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Speaker 5: to be on your phone unless you're actually talking to someone,

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Speaker 5: because then if someone tries to attack you, you have

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Speaker 5: a witness.

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Speaker 4: I have heard the keys is actually not it's yeah.

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Speaker 5: It's not well because anything that involves close up yeah

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Speaker 5: is not great. And the amount of course that it

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Speaker 5: would still take probably, like you know, pepper strain is

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Speaker 5: gonna be better some places that it's not legal, but

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Speaker 5: look up, protect yourselves, look up. Well, we can fall

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Speaker 5: back to the broad sword. You can always fall back

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Speaker 5: to the broad sort.

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Speaker 3: My wife's best friend kissed me. What do I do now?

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Speaker 7: Tell your wife stupid?

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Speaker 3: This happened on Friday, and I've taken the weekend to

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Speaker 3: process it, but I still don't know what to do.

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Speaker 3: I twenty six males somehow ended up kissing my wife's

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Speaker 3: when he ate female best friend? Who will call amy

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Speaker 3: twenty four female.

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Speaker 7: Somehow, somehow.

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Speaker 3: By the way, this comes from a throwaway secret cat

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Speaker 3: And if you want to sing your own stories, go

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Speaker 3: to the r sash Okay story time subredd it Nope,

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Speaker 3: he says. On Friday, Amy needed someone to pick up

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Speaker 3: her three year old from daycare since she was working

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Speaker 3: late and had a date planned. I didn't know about

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Speaker 3: the time or the date. Amy is a single mom

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Speaker 3: who left her harmful X not long after their kid

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Speaker 3: was born, and is still involved in ongoing custody and

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Speaker 3: harmful cases in court. My wife and I have been

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Speaker 3: helping with childcare since the breakup, as Amy's ex and

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Speaker 3: his family are apparently unreliable and her own parents seem

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Speaker 3: to have a similar attitude. We often help with daycare

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Speaker 3: pickups or we can babysitting, Especially since Amy works odd

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Speaker 3: shifts at the hospital. I spend more time with the

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Speaker 3: kid because I work a regular nine to five and

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Speaker 3: my manager is more relaxed than my wife's crazy schedule

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Speaker 3: and boss. So sounds like your dad, op father, dad

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Speaker 3: or daddy. He's probably trying to get a promotion.

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Speaker 7: The daddy h daddy emotion.

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Speaker 3: M None of this has ever been an issue. In fact,

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Speaker 3: it's helped my wife and I prepare for having her

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Speaker 3: own child's and understanding the work that goes into parenting.

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Speaker 3: We also know Amy is going back to school in

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Speaker 3: the fall to study healthcare, and we'll likely need continued

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Speaker 3: support with childcare. Our friends have pointed out that I

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Speaker 3: have been playing dad for a kid that's not mine,

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Speaker 3: and this is what changed my wife's in my mind

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Speaker 3: on actually wanting our own kids. What does that mean,

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Speaker 3: Like you want kids now because you like being a dad,

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Speaker 3: or I don't want kids now because I actually have

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Speaker 3: a kid in a whey Yeah.

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Speaker 8: I couldn't tell if that was like, well, we already

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Speaker 8: mission accomplished without realizing it, or if it's like have

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Speaker 8: our own, let's breed our own.

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Speaker 3: Friday, I picked up the kid from daycare after work

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Speaker 3: and stop for groceries before heading home to pick up

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Speaker 3: my wife and go to a friend's place for game night.

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Speaker 3: They're also great with having the kid around around APM.

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Speaker 3: Amy texted my wife to say she was on her

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Speaker 3: way over to pick the kid up. When she arrived,

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Speaker 3: she looked exhausted. I packed up the kids things and

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Speaker 3: carried him to the car and just made out with Amy. Wait, WHOA,

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Speaker 3: I made that last part of that.

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Speaker 8: He made that up because he's a trickster. Yeah he's Loki, Okay,

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Speaker 8: are Loki? He's the little chaos princeling.

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Speaker 3: I know what's about to happen, but it just doesn't

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Speaker 3: make sense so far. I don't I don't get up.

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Speaker 3: Nothing smells fishy.

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00:13:18,040 --> 00:13:19,319
Speaker 7: See what happens.

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Speaker 3: While swapping the car seat back to Amy's car, we

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Speaker 3: made small talk about her day. That's when she mentioned

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Speaker 3: her day at flaked. He found out from a friend

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Speaker 3: that she had a kid and hadn't told him. This

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Speaker 3: isn't the first time it's happened. My wife has told

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Speaker 3: me about similar situations, and once Amy's ex even pestered

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Speaker 3: one of their dates, who was likely a great fit.

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Speaker 3: Three dates in. From what I understand, Amy prefers to

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Speaker 3: disclose that she has a kid in person rather over text,

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Speaker 3: as it's likely a touchy subject. She started crying, but

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Speaker 3: I buckled up the kid in and turned back to

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Speaker 3: comfort her. Being the socially awkward penguin that I am,

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Speaker 3: I didn't know how to handle the situation, so I

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Speaker 3: awkwardly pat her on the head, which felt wrong, offered

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Speaker 3: a hug.

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Speaker 7: What does she adult with?

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Speaker 5: Ah?

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Speaker 7: Yeah, good, good girl?

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Speaker 3: Stop crying?

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Speaker 7: Adult?

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Speaker 8: Yeah the adult You patted her on the head like

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Speaker 8: a dog. Okay, stop crying?

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Speaker 3: Quit it please. During the hug, Amy looked up and

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Speaker 3: kissed me. I froze where by the time I processed

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Speaker 3: what had happened, she pulled away and said she should

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Speaker 3: get home to bed. Was it even romantic? What the heck?

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Speaker 3: I was stunned and didn't know what to do, So

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Speaker 3: I went back inside and continue to game night.

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Speaker 8: What do you mean you tell your wife that her

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Speaker 8: bff kissed you on the mouth or whatever?

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Speaker 7: But like, did she even what if?

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Speaker 1: Yeah?

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Speaker 3: But if you saw my poker hand, you'dn't understand.

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Speaker 1: Why your lipso red? Huh?

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Speaker 7: What do you mean?

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Speaker 3: Like, if you knew I had like pocket aces, would

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Speaker 3: you contend your game night or would you go tell

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00:14:58,520 --> 00:14:59,840
Speaker 3: your wife you pocket a?

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Speaker 1: I'd probably finish. Yeah. Yeah. If you have like the

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00:15:05,480 --> 00:15:08,160
Speaker 1: longest road in Katon and you're one point away.

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00:15:07,920 --> 00:15:11,000
Speaker 3: From and you're almost getting largest army, yeah, I.

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00:15:11,120 --> 00:15:14,120
Speaker 1: Like you literally one victory point away from winning.

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00:15:13,880 --> 00:15:16,720
Speaker 8: Guy, I'd immediately I would at least send it text

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00:15:16,760 --> 00:15:18,760
Speaker 8: to say I have something crazy to tell you my

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Speaker 8: home tonight.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, okay, Yeah, So I told my wife that Amy's

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00:15:23,040 --> 00:15:25,600
Speaker 3: day at flaked. I know Amy caught her up on

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Speaker 3: the details of the fell day on Saturday because my

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00:15:28,880 --> 00:15:31,920
Speaker 3: wife spilled the tea, but there was no mention of

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Speaker 3: the hug or kiss. I haven't told my wife about

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Speaker 3: the kiss. I'm not sure what to do. Part of

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00:15:38,320 --> 00:15:40,440
Speaker 3: me thinks I should tell her, but I worry she

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Speaker 3: will lose a friend over what I believe was a

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00:15:43,640 --> 00:15:45,480
Speaker 3: lapse in judgment on Amy's part.

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Speaker 8: Bruh, you're describing why people lose friends. Their friend had

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Speaker 8: a lapse in judgment and kissed their husband.

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Speaker 7: Bye.

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00:15:54,600 --> 00:15:58,960
Speaker 8: Goodbye, bye friend, bye, at least for now, bye friend

354
00:15:59,320 --> 00:16:00,520
Speaker 8: not friends anymore.

355
00:16:00,760 --> 00:16:04,120
Speaker 3: And yes, I'm aware I'll get my fair share of

356
00:16:04,200 --> 00:16:07,280
Speaker 3: judgment from Reddit and from my wife for not telling

357
00:16:07,320 --> 00:16:10,960
Speaker 3: her right away. I'll deserve it was this cheating, We

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00:16:11,000 --> 00:16:14,880
Speaker 3: have an update. The perspective of it is cheating if

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00:16:14,880 --> 00:16:16,840
Speaker 3: you do not tell right away. So I'm going to

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Speaker 3: say it kind of looks like it.

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00:16:18,080 --> 00:16:20,600
Speaker 8: It wasn't cheating until you're like, I am not going

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Speaker 8: to tell my wife about it.

363
00:16:22,680 --> 00:16:23,840
Speaker 7: Now. You're weird for that.

364
00:16:24,200 --> 00:16:28,880
Speaker 8: Yeah, and it definitely feels like you're doing something wrong.

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00:16:29,320 --> 00:16:31,760
Speaker 3: Yeah, but we have an update. If you ever had

366
00:16:31,760 --> 00:16:34,080
Speaker 3: the previous post, it's clear that I had a lot

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00:16:34,120 --> 00:16:36,480
Speaker 3: to take away from the situation and to work on

368
00:16:36,920 --> 00:16:39,520
Speaker 3: clear up a couple of questions and comments. Our friend

369
00:16:39,520 --> 00:16:42,440
Speaker 3: group has a thirteen year age gap from youngest to oldest.

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00:16:42,840 --> 00:16:45,960
Speaker 3: Most of us have or had siblings and the group,

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Speaker 3: which is why we have such an age different because

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00:16:48,920 --> 00:16:51,880
Speaker 3: he's like twenty eight, she's twenty four. Okay, I'm oh,

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Speaker 3: here we go. I'm autistic and have an issue with

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Speaker 3: dealing with most uncomfortable situations.

375
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Speaker 8: He now, I feel bad about making fun of you

376
00:16:59,480 --> 00:17:01,120
Speaker 8: for being so awkward, penguin.

377
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Speaker 3: I knew I was going to bite you in the

378
00:17:02,480 --> 00:17:03,000
Speaker 3: butt somehow.

379
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Speaker 7: I don't really care.

380
00:17:04,960 --> 00:17:08,000
Speaker 8: I still stand that it's if you get kissed by

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00:17:08,000 --> 00:17:12,199
Speaker 8: your wife's best friend, you need to go, oh, what

382
00:17:12,520 --> 00:17:13,120
Speaker 8: just happened?

383
00:17:13,240 --> 00:17:13,680
Speaker 3: Yeah?

384
00:17:14,119 --> 00:17:15,280
Speaker 7: You, why did you do this?

385
00:17:16,280 --> 00:17:19,440
Speaker 8: I don't really Especially if you have the awareness that

386
00:17:19,440 --> 00:17:21,399
Speaker 8: that happens to you, you need to also have the

387
00:17:21,440 --> 00:17:23,439
Speaker 8: awareness that you need to work on it. Hmmm.

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00:17:24,160 --> 00:17:28,200
Speaker 3: Yeah, agreed. The kiss was on the lips, and yes,

389
00:17:28,640 --> 00:17:31,639
Speaker 3: I froze in the situation. It didn't come across to

390
00:17:31,680 --> 00:17:35,040
Speaker 3: me as anything other than on I thought about telling

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Speaker 3: my wife right away, what was uncomfortable doing so in

392
00:17:38,560 --> 00:17:40,680
Speaker 3: front of the others, so I didn't At the time.

393
00:17:41,119 --> 00:17:42,800
Speaker 3: It was playing on my mind for the rest of

394
00:17:42,840 --> 00:17:46,480
Speaker 3: the game night and had me unsure what it was

395
00:17:46,760 --> 00:17:49,439
Speaker 3: and if it was important to tell her. After the

396
00:17:49,440 --> 00:17:52,240
Speaker 3: initial post, I left work early to inform my wife

397
00:17:52,280 --> 00:17:55,479
Speaker 3: what happened on Friday. After two long hours, we had

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00:17:55,520 --> 00:17:58,040
Speaker 3: a few things to deal with. We agreed I was

399
00:17:58,080 --> 00:18:00,640
Speaker 3: wrong for not telling her right away about it, which

400
00:18:00,720 --> 00:18:03,359
Speaker 3: is no surprise, but she was thankful I told her.

401
00:18:03,600 --> 00:18:07,560
Speaker 3: We promised to work on our relationship and communication. Okay,

402
00:18:08,119 --> 00:18:08,840
Speaker 3: it worked it out.

403
00:18:09,320 --> 00:18:13,000
Speaker 8: Yeah, I mean I think I think it's clear, like

404
00:18:13,200 --> 00:18:16,119
Speaker 8: you weren't like hiding it from her because you're like,

405
00:18:16,520 --> 00:18:18,800
Speaker 8: oh no, like I'm gonna get in trouble.

406
00:18:18,880 --> 00:18:20,720
Speaker 7: It was more just like a what do I do?

407
00:18:21,320 --> 00:18:23,960
Speaker 7: Mm hmmm do I do? What do I do?

408
00:18:24,000 --> 00:18:27,080
Speaker 3: I don't know. He knew what to do. Usually, whatever

409
00:18:27,080 --> 00:18:29,320
Speaker 3: the hardest thing to do is in your mind, is

410
00:18:29,359 --> 00:18:30,159
Speaker 3: what you have to do.

411
00:18:30,400 --> 00:18:30,840
Speaker 7: Yeah.

412
00:18:30,920 --> 00:18:34,399
Speaker 3: So after work the following day, following commenter's advice, we

413
00:18:34,440 --> 00:18:36,000
Speaker 3: took a trip to get out of town for a

414
00:18:36,000 --> 00:18:38,840
Speaker 3: few days and go camping. This has helped us reconnect

415
00:18:38,920 --> 00:18:41,560
Speaker 3: and remind us why we got married in the first place.

416
00:18:41,840 --> 00:18:44,080
Speaker 3: We got back to town today and my wife had

417
00:18:44,080 --> 00:18:46,920
Speaker 3: invited Amy over in the evening to discuss what happened.

418
00:18:47,240 --> 00:18:49,919
Speaker 3: My wife decided that she wanted to further talk about

419
00:18:49,920 --> 00:18:53,480
Speaker 3: what happened in person after she spoke to her initially

420
00:18:53,520 --> 00:18:57,720
Speaker 3: on Monday. The conversation on Monday with Amy, following your advice,

421
00:18:57,840 --> 00:19:01,240
Speaker 3: I suggested that my wife call Amy confirm my story,

422
00:19:01,560 --> 00:19:04,840
Speaker 3: so she did. Amy immediately confessed before my wife even

423
00:19:04,920 --> 00:19:07,520
Speaker 3: had a chance to confront her fully. Amy said that

424
00:19:07,600 --> 00:19:10,760
Speaker 3: she has been struggling recently and she needed support. The

425
00:19:10,840 --> 00:19:13,760
Speaker 3: fell date and seeing me play father figure, along with

426
00:19:13,880 --> 00:19:17,119
Speaker 3: seeming to care about her day, made her feel wanted.

427
00:19:17,280 --> 00:19:20,640
Speaker 3: She said that she felt awful immediately and that it

428
00:19:20,720 --> 00:19:23,479
Speaker 3: was why she rushed home. This call went on for

429
00:19:23,520 --> 00:19:26,719
Speaker 3: nearly an hour, where we discussed how we felt hurt

430
00:19:26,760 --> 00:19:28,879
Speaker 3: as a couple and how we need to set up

431
00:19:28,920 --> 00:19:32,120
Speaker 3: some boundaries. We agreed that we would be stepping back

432
00:19:32,119 --> 00:19:35,480
Speaker 3: from helping her and the kid for the time being,

433
00:19:35,840 --> 00:19:38,399
Speaker 3: but agreed that if we were to help again, my

434
00:19:38,480 --> 00:19:40,800
Speaker 3: wife would deal with the most of it. My wife

435
00:19:40,840 --> 00:19:43,080
Speaker 3: and I agreed that I wouldn't be left alone with

436
00:19:43,119 --> 00:19:46,160
Speaker 3: Amy for some time to be sure, and this includes

437
00:19:46,240 --> 00:19:50,719
Speaker 3: game nights. Amy said that she understood how we felt

438
00:19:51,080 --> 00:19:54,320
Speaker 3: and continued to show remore. So my wife for some reason,

439
00:19:54,720 --> 00:19:57,880
Speaker 3: invited her over today Friday. So the two of them

440
00:19:57,960 --> 00:20:01,640
Speaker 3: spoke for a few hours today about everything. They went

441
00:20:01,720 --> 00:20:05,159
Speaker 3: back over the boundaries that and what was expected if

442
00:20:05,200 --> 00:20:07,480
Speaker 3: Amy was going to remain friends with us. I guess

443
00:20:07,520 --> 00:20:09,720
Speaker 3: what I think is the right choice. Our wife and

444
00:20:09,760 --> 00:20:12,840
Speaker 3: Amy are going to continue as friends for now. We

445
00:20:12,880 --> 00:20:15,399
Speaker 3: are still going to help out, but the interactions that

446
00:20:15,440 --> 00:20:18,160
Speaker 3: I have with Amy will be limited as I am

447
00:20:18,440 --> 00:20:21,359
Speaker 3: still not one hundred percent sure of the whole situation.

448
00:20:22,000 --> 00:20:24,080
Speaker 3: Which is fair fair?

449
00:20:24,119 --> 00:20:26,359
Speaker 7: I don't know. This seems a little too much to me.

450
00:20:26,920 --> 00:20:28,640
Speaker 3: Really, I think this is great.

451
00:20:28,800 --> 00:20:31,520
Speaker 7: I think, yeah, maybe that's just me.

452
00:20:31,880 --> 00:20:33,840
Speaker 3: I know many of you will be against this, but

453
00:20:33,960 --> 00:20:36,480
Speaker 3: we have set some ground rules on how often we'll

454
00:20:36,520 --> 00:20:39,240
Speaker 3: help her out. Amy agreed that looking for a partner

455
00:20:39,320 --> 00:20:41,240
Speaker 3: right now will be the last thing on her list,

456
00:20:41,760 --> 00:20:44,760
Speaker 3: and she will be focusing on her child work and

457
00:20:44,800 --> 00:20:48,520
Speaker 3: mental health. Amy is already in counseling and is likely

458
00:20:49,119 --> 00:20:52,160
Speaker 3: needing to spend more time there. We agree that this

459
00:20:52,400 --> 00:20:55,040
Speaker 3: was something not to be discussed with the wider of

460
00:20:55,119 --> 00:20:57,679
Speaker 3: our friend group, as we are sure they all have

461
00:20:57,920 --> 00:21:00,879
Speaker 3: very different opinions and we all want to keep the peace.

462
00:21:01,320 --> 00:21:04,520
Speaker 3: One key boundary that I think has made a massive

463
00:21:04,560 --> 00:21:07,639
Speaker 3: difference on the outcome of this and hopefully helped Amy

464
00:21:08,080 --> 00:21:11,040
Speaker 3: understand the situation and how I felt, is that I

465
00:21:11,160 --> 00:21:14,160
Speaker 3: won't be carpooling with Amy to work when she gets

466
00:21:14,160 --> 00:21:18,680
Speaker 3: back to university in September, less alone time. I work

467
00:21:18,720 --> 00:21:21,639
Speaker 3: in the next city over, not far from the university.

468
00:21:21,880 --> 00:21:24,359
Speaker 3: For all this happened, I agree to take Amy into

469
00:21:24,400 --> 00:21:26,720
Speaker 3: the city on my way to work for the few

470
00:21:26,840 --> 00:21:31,160
Speaker 3: days she has in person classes, as I will already

471
00:21:31,160 --> 00:21:34,199
Speaker 3: be making the trip, and especially in the winter, the

472
00:21:34,280 --> 00:21:37,359
Speaker 3: roads can get dangerous. I feel bad for this, but

473
00:21:37,960 --> 00:21:40,720
Speaker 3: it was one of the things my wife had reminded

474
00:21:40,760 --> 00:21:43,400
Speaker 3: me that I would have to be alone with her

475
00:21:43,440 --> 00:21:46,280
Speaker 3: in the car for some time. Depending on how things go,

476
00:21:46,640 --> 00:21:49,040
Speaker 3: I might be willing to offer this again, but not

477
00:21:49,119 --> 00:21:51,320
Speaker 3: sure if it's the right thing to do. My wife

478
00:21:51,359 --> 00:21:54,280
Speaker 3: has gone to bed early tonight, as camping takes a

479
00:21:54,320 --> 00:21:56,960
Speaker 3: toll on the body, and I am left wondering about

480
00:21:57,000 --> 00:22:00,440
Speaker 3: this whole thing, and hopefully things will go back sort

481
00:22:00,440 --> 00:22:03,359
Speaker 3: of normal soon. I feel like this story we should

482
00:22:03,359 --> 00:22:06,200
Speaker 3: all implement a rule in our lives to never ask

483
00:22:06,320 --> 00:22:10,000
Speaker 3: another woman that's not our girlfriends how their day's going alone.

484
00:22:10,200 --> 00:22:14,040
Speaker 7: Our our Wait can you say that one more time?

485
00:22:14,160 --> 00:22:18,040
Speaker 3: Yeah, So I'm saying that us, we have girlfriends, we

486
00:22:18,040 --> 00:22:20,800
Speaker 3: should not ask anyone that's not our girlfriend, that is

487
00:22:20,840 --> 00:22:23,080
Speaker 3: a woman, how the day's going, because they might kiss us.

488
00:22:23,320 --> 00:22:26,040
Speaker 7: I can't even see women who are my girlfriend.

489
00:22:26,119 --> 00:22:29,080
Speaker 1: So everyone there, I'm not asking how your day's going.

490
00:22:29,160 --> 00:22:29,959
Speaker 1: I can't talk to you.

491
00:22:30,400 --> 00:22:30,920
Speaker 7: Keep it up.

492
00:22:31,040 --> 00:22:33,240
Speaker 3: Yes, that's the energy I like to see.

493
00:22:33,600 --> 00:22:36,360
Speaker 1: I don't know who you are. Yes, you know I'm

494
00:22:36,359 --> 00:22:36,960
Speaker 1: not even here.

495
00:22:37,320 --> 00:22:40,159
Speaker 3: And I bet you, Tim Bucks, You're not gonna get kissed. Well,

496
00:22:40,440 --> 00:22:43,359
Speaker 3: oh dude, I mean yeah. That was the whole problem

497
00:22:43,359 --> 00:22:45,080
Speaker 3: here is he asked her how your day was and

498
00:22:45,119 --> 00:22:45,800
Speaker 3: he got kissed.

499
00:22:46,200 --> 00:22:46,680
Speaker 7: Yeah.

500
00:22:46,720 --> 00:22:49,040
Speaker 3: But we have a little bit left here. Our marriage

501
00:22:49,080 --> 00:22:51,919
Speaker 3: seems to be still intact, and we have shared a

502
00:22:51,960 --> 00:22:54,920
Speaker 3: lot and discussed the feelings we have both have been

503
00:22:54,960 --> 00:22:58,800
Speaker 3: having about other issues in our relationship. Our marriage isn't perfect,

504
00:22:59,080 --> 00:23:01,159
Speaker 3: but we are going to work on it and promise

505
00:23:01,240 --> 00:23:03,840
Speaker 3: not to let things like this happen again. Turns out,

506
00:23:04,160 --> 00:23:07,040
Speaker 3: when you communicate effectively, you both find out the things

507
00:23:07,040 --> 00:23:10,240
Speaker 3: that annoy us about the relationship, which made the whole

508
00:23:10,320 --> 00:23:13,480
Speaker 3: kiss issue the least concerning. We both have a lot

509
00:23:13,560 --> 00:23:15,919
Speaker 3: to work on when it comes to our relationship as

510
00:23:15,960 --> 00:23:18,840
Speaker 3: a whole, but it's something we are both willing to

511
00:23:18,840 --> 00:23:20,679
Speaker 3: work on. I'm not sure if keeping Amy as a

512
00:23:20,720 --> 00:23:23,720
Speaker 3: friend was a good idea, but I will have to

513
00:23:23,760 --> 00:23:26,879
Speaker 3: see how this goes before approaching my wife. This was

514
00:23:26,920 --> 00:23:29,919
Speaker 3: the right thing to do. And yeah, also, if this

515
00:23:30,000 --> 00:23:33,120
Speaker 3: is your least concerns in your relationship, I don't know.

516
00:23:33,640 --> 00:23:35,800
Speaker 3: I mean that kind of rubbed me a little bit

517
00:23:35,840 --> 00:23:36,440
Speaker 3: in the wrong way.

518
00:23:36,840 --> 00:23:37,280
Speaker 7: I don't know.

519
00:23:37,359 --> 00:23:41,119
Speaker 3: Yeah, I think like your friend kissed me, But it

520
00:23:41,119 --> 00:23:43,000
Speaker 3: looks like we have other things to work on rather

521
00:23:43,040 --> 00:23:43,280
Speaker 3: than that.

522
00:23:43,920 --> 00:23:49,119
Speaker 8: Well, I mean it does kind of read like a Yeah,

523
00:23:49,160 --> 00:23:52,200
Speaker 8: you need to learn how to stick up for yourself

524
00:23:52,240 --> 00:23:56,840
Speaker 8: and talk properly. Confront people, confront each other.

525
00:23:57,160 --> 00:23:59,040
Speaker 7: It's in your relationship. You still have to be able

526
00:23:59,080 --> 00:24:01,560
Speaker 7: to confront the person that you're in a relationship with.

527
00:24:02,040 --> 00:24:06,000
Speaker 8: Yeah, my husband has been lying about his health and

528
00:24:06,119 --> 00:24:07,280
Speaker 8: now I'm livid.

529
00:24:07,960 --> 00:24:09,720
Speaker 3: It might be lying about all other things too.

530
00:24:10,359 --> 00:24:14,120
Speaker 8: My husband, thirty two male, and I thirty two female,

531
00:24:14,520 --> 00:24:17,320
Speaker 8: have been together for eight years. A few days ago,

532
00:24:17,400 --> 00:24:20,360
Speaker 8: he started complaining about a bump on his nose today,

533
00:24:20,440 --> 00:24:22,760
Speaker 8: he went to the er and eventually they told him

534
00:24:22,760 --> 00:24:26,600
Speaker 8: he has I knew he'd been infected before we got

535
00:24:26,640 --> 00:24:29,800
Speaker 8: together and thought he had had it treated. Apparently, if

536
00:24:29,840 --> 00:24:33,399
Speaker 8: you don't finish the course of antibiotics, it can come back.

537
00:24:33,640 --> 00:24:36,359
Speaker 8: By the way, this comes from user Virtual Moment forty

538
00:24:36,400 --> 00:24:39,800
Speaker 8: seven forty five. If you want to submit your own stories,

539
00:24:39,840 --> 00:24:43,560
Speaker 8: go to the r slash Okay storytime subredit and Op says,

540
00:24:44,320 --> 00:24:48,320
Speaker 8: here's what made me furious. In eight years, I have

541
00:24:48,680 --> 00:24:51,840
Speaker 8: never had it. I've been pregnant twice, and I know

542
00:24:51,880 --> 00:24:55,760
Speaker 8: they test for STDs during pregnancy. Until last year, we

543
00:24:55,800 --> 00:24:57,840
Speaker 8: had a very active, spicy sleep live.

544
00:24:58,320 --> 00:24:59,879
Speaker 7: But I changed jobs.

545
00:24:59,520 --> 00:25:03,080
Speaker 8: And have been home often. When I'm home, I'm exhausted.

546
00:25:03,520 --> 00:25:07,080
Speaker 8: My husband also has been working more. When I picked

547
00:25:07,160 --> 00:25:09,040
Speaker 8: him up from the hospital and he told me about

548
00:25:09,040 --> 00:25:13,040
Speaker 8: the infection, I was livid. How could he have had

549
00:25:13,080 --> 00:25:16,240
Speaker 8: it all this time without me getting it? The only

550
00:25:16,240 --> 00:25:18,760
Speaker 8: way I can see him having it while I don't

551
00:25:19,040 --> 00:25:24,919
Speaker 8: is if he cheated. Ye, it wouldn't be the first time.

552
00:25:25,160 --> 00:25:28,240
Speaker 8: OP says, Oh.

553
00:25:27,560 --> 00:25:29,399
Speaker 3: Are you girl? Girl?

554
00:25:29,520 --> 00:25:30,399
Speaker 7: What are we doing?

555
00:25:31,000 --> 00:25:34,960
Speaker 8: He started crying in the car, saying he hadn't cheated.

556
00:25:35,119 --> 00:25:38,000
Speaker 7: And was sorry. His past was causing issues.

557
00:25:38,119 --> 00:25:41,119
Speaker 8: Now, I don't care if this is something that flared

558
00:25:41,200 --> 00:25:45,040
Speaker 8: up from before. I wasn't exactly a V card holder

559
00:25:45,080 --> 00:25:48,000
Speaker 8: when we met either, and I knew he had a

560
00:25:48,240 --> 00:25:53,760
Speaker 8: very spicyly active past, and you know, stuff happens. My

561
00:25:53,840 --> 00:25:56,159
Speaker 8: anger comes from the possibility that he cheated on me.

562
00:25:56,720 --> 00:25:59,000
Speaker 8: I told him that, and I told him the crying

563
00:25:59,320 --> 00:26:02,240
Speaker 8: was just me making me angrier, and he told me

564
00:26:02,280 --> 00:26:03,959
Speaker 8: to pull over and let him out of the car.

565
00:26:04,400 --> 00:26:07,399
Speaker 8: Now he's walking home. He weren't very far. And now

566
00:26:07,440 --> 00:26:09,600
Speaker 8: I'm just sitting in the car in front of our place,

567
00:26:09,680 --> 00:26:12,080
Speaker 8: typing this. I don't even know what I want to

568
00:26:12,119 --> 00:26:15,879
Speaker 8: do or should do. I'm just so sick of this crap.

569
00:26:16,320 --> 00:26:18,200
Speaker 8: I can't take care of our kids on my own,

570
00:26:18,480 --> 00:26:20,439
Speaker 8: and I feel so stupid and stuck.

571
00:26:20,840 --> 00:26:21,720
Speaker 7: And there's an idiot.

572
00:26:21,920 --> 00:26:24,399
Speaker 8: I plan on getting tested, and I'm hoping the doctor

573
00:26:24,440 --> 00:26:27,320
Speaker 8: may be able to explain how this happened. From what

574
00:26:27,359 --> 00:26:30,800
Speaker 8: I've seen online, it can be dormant in men for years.

575
00:26:31,240 --> 00:26:34,320
Speaker 8: I'm just confused why I haven't gotten it yet. The

576
00:26:34,359 --> 00:26:40,280
Speaker 8: bump is apparently blepharitis. Wait, what is that ble Yeah?

577
00:26:40,320 --> 00:26:42,760
Speaker 8: And that was the second edit. The third edit is

578
00:26:42,960 --> 00:26:43,520
Speaker 8: he's gone.

579
00:26:43,920 --> 00:26:46,120
Speaker 1: Oh wait what, I had to.

580
00:26:46,040 --> 00:26:49,480
Speaker 7: Call the cops. In the end, I'm fine, my kids

581
00:26:49,520 --> 00:26:52,600
Speaker 7: are fine, but he's gone. Thank you.

582
00:26:53,040 --> 00:26:55,399
Speaker 8: I don't think I would have had the courage to

583
00:26:55,480 --> 00:26:57,560
Speaker 8: actually go through with it if.

584
00:26:57,440 --> 00:26:59,880
Speaker 7: It weren't for you. And there's an update.

585
00:27:00,920 --> 00:27:01,480
Speaker 3: Okay.

586
00:27:01,800 --> 00:27:03,840
Speaker 7: I asked my husband for a divorce.

587
00:27:04,400 --> 00:27:06,960
Speaker 8: He didn't take it well, and I ultimately had to

588
00:27:07,000 --> 00:27:09,720
Speaker 8: call the police to get him to leave. My boys

589
00:27:09,720 --> 00:27:12,280
Speaker 8: and I are okay. My sister is staying with us

590
00:27:12,359 --> 00:27:15,560
Speaker 8: now and we have plans to move in together. My

591
00:27:15,680 --> 00:27:19,400
Speaker 8: husband spent the night cycling between crying and begging, then

592
00:27:19,520 --> 00:27:21,320
Speaker 8: asking why I wasn't reacting.

593
00:27:21,760 --> 00:27:22,880
Speaker 7: I didn't scream or yell.

594
00:27:23,320 --> 00:27:25,520
Speaker 8: I just went through my normal routine of picking up

595
00:27:25,560 --> 00:27:28,760
Speaker 8: and dropping off the kids. The longer I stayed calm,

596
00:27:28,840 --> 00:27:30,399
Speaker 8: the more desperate he became.

597
00:27:30,680 --> 00:27:33,640
Speaker 3: He wants to manipulate your emotions.

598
00:27:33,800 --> 00:27:36,040
Speaker 7: Well, yeah, I feel like, Oh you're crying.

599
00:27:36,119 --> 00:27:38,800
Speaker 3: Oh I can help you. I'll be better. Oh you're Madamy,

600
00:27:39,040 --> 00:27:40,359
Speaker 3: calm down. I can make it better.

601
00:27:41,119 --> 00:27:45,640
Speaker 8: What is that darvo, deny accuse, perverse, victim offender?

602
00:27:46,119 --> 00:27:48,240
Speaker 3: Probably and he can't do that.

603
00:27:48,400 --> 00:27:50,840
Speaker 8: If you're just like, I'm just gonna take the kids

604
00:27:51,280 --> 00:27:53,600
Speaker 8: and also, yeah, you wonder why she's acting like this

605
00:27:53,720 --> 00:27:55,720
Speaker 8: because it's not the first time you've done this.

606
00:27:56,200 --> 00:27:56,840
Speaker 7: Yeah.

607
00:27:56,920 --> 00:28:00,360
Speaker 8: So yesterday, after we dropped off the kids, I went

608
00:28:00,440 --> 00:28:01,120
Speaker 8: to get tested.

609
00:28:01,680 --> 00:28:02,760
Speaker 7: He waited in the car.

610
00:28:03,160 --> 00:28:05,200
Speaker 8: I hadn't been sitting in the waiting room for five

611
00:28:05,280 --> 00:28:08,040
Speaker 8: minutes when he came in, insisting he had to tell

612
00:28:08,080 --> 00:28:11,359
Speaker 8: me something right that moment. It couldn't wait until I

613
00:28:11,440 --> 00:28:14,560
Speaker 8: was done. I had to come outside right now. I

614
00:28:14,600 --> 00:28:17,200
Speaker 8: thought he was finally going to admit it. He said

615
00:28:17,240 --> 00:28:19,960
Speaker 8: it was really hard and he was being vulnerable with me,

616
00:28:20,560 --> 00:28:23,960
Speaker 8: but he had to tell me that he didn't cheat. Apparently,

617
00:28:24,000 --> 00:28:27,520
Speaker 8: four months ago, while dropping off a DoorDash order, he

618
00:28:27,800 --> 00:28:33,320
Speaker 8: was held at the pew pew point by two men.

619
00:28:33,840 --> 00:28:36,159
Speaker 7: What he was working in a city.

620
00:28:36,200 --> 00:28:38,200
Speaker 8: I told him not to take orders in because it's

621
00:28:38,200 --> 00:28:40,880
Speaker 8: not safe, So he was really sorry. He didn't listen

622
00:28:40,920 --> 00:28:43,720
Speaker 8: to me, and I was right after this, he basically

623
00:28:43,800 --> 00:28:46,440
Speaker 8: asked me how I felt about what he said. I

624
00:28:46,520 --> 00:28:49,720
Speaker 8: told him, if that really happened, he should probably file

625
00:28:49,760 --> 00:28:53,200
Speaker 8: a police report, and after a lot of hesitation, he did.

626
00:28:53,640 --> 00:28:57,200
Speaker 8: I couldn't believe it. He actually filed a fake police report.

627
00:28:57,520 --> 00:29:01,520
Speaker 3: What just so he could tell you a lie. So

628
00:29:01,600 --> 00:29:04,640
Speaker 3: he is cheating, He cheated on you? What kind of

629
00:29:04,720 --> 00:29:07,280
Speaker 3: story is that? It feels like a story that came

630
00:29:07,320 --> 00:29:10,000
Speaker 3: out of like nineteen fifties, like in uh, what do

631
00:29:10,000 --> 00:29:10,920
Speaker 3: you Gotham City?

632
00:29:11,040 --> 00:29:14,600
Speaker 8: What does that have to do with anything?

633
00:29:15,200 --> 00:29:18,200
Speaker 7: What does that have to do with you cheating on me?

634
00:29:18,840 --> 00:29:19,800
Speaker 1: What I have to do with you?

635
00:29:19,680 --> 00:29:19,800
Speaker 5: You?

636
00:29:21,840 --> 00:29:21,920
Speaker 7: Ye?

637
00:29:22,200 --> 00:29:24,040
Speaker 3: Like, did they give it to you? They threw it

638
00:29:24,080 --> 00:29:27,400
Speaker 3: at me? Yeah, and they threw it in my eyebawl.

639
00:29:27,480 --> 00:29:30,200
Speaker 1: Yeah, they threw it at me at QP your point?

640
00:29:30,400 --> 00:29:31,120
Speaker 7: What's crazy?

641
00:29:31,200 --> 00:29:32,400
Speaker 1: And you didn't say anything?

642
00:29:32,880 --> 00:29:33,600
Speaker 7: What was he doing?

643
00:29:33,720 --> 00:29:36,560
Speaker 8: Was he just fishing, just straight fishing for sympathy at

644
00:29:36,560 --> 00:29:39,160
Speaker 8: that point, he's looking for that. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I

645
00:29:39,200 --> 00:29:42,479
Speaker 8: had a new Uh my life was endangered. Well, how

646
00:29:42,520 --> 00:29:45,640
Speaker 8: do you feel like I feel like you should tell

647
00:29:45,680 --> 00:29:46,520
Speaker 8: the police about that?

648
00:29:47,120 --> 00:29:48,640
Speaker 3: Okay, I'm okay.

649
00:29:48,440 --> 00:29:50,680
Speaker 7: Maybe I will do Maybe I will, maybe I will.

650
00:29:50,960 --> 00:29:51,760
Speaker 5: Uh what?

651
00:29:52,440 --> 00:29:55,600
Speaker 8: So when he finished his crying act with the officer

652
00:29:56,080 --> 00:29:59,360
Speaker 8: and was escorted out, the officer asked me what I thought.

653
00:30:00,080 --> 00:30:02,080
Speaker 8: I think he could tell by my face what I

654
00:30:02,120 --> 00:30:04,840
Speaker 8: thought of the story. I told the officer the truth,

655
00:30:05,200 --> 00:30:07,880
Speaker 8: that it was one hundred percent fake. I told him

656
00:30:07,880 --> 00:30:11,080
Speaker 8: about everything that had happened since Monday. He wouldn't give

657
00:30:11,120 --> 00:30:13,240
Speaker 8: me a straight answer when I asked if he thought

658
00:30:13,280 --> 00:30:17,280
Speaker 8: it was true. My husband, the perpetual victim, was probably

659
00:30:17,360 --> 00:30:19,560
Speaker 8: expecting me to baby him and pat him on the

660
00:30:19,600 --> 00:30:22,480
Speaker 8: back for having the courage to come forward. I made

661
00:30:22,520 --> 00:30:25,400
Speaker 8: it clear I didn't believe him. When he got home,

662
00:30:25,480 --> 00:30:27,880
Speaker 8: he came into our room and started taking all his

663
00:30:28,000 --> 00:30:30,880
Speaker 8: clothes out of our closet, putting them on our bed.

664
00:30:31,360 --> 00:30:33,520
Speaker 7: He asked me again if I wanted him to leave.

665
00:30:34,000 --> 00:30:36,600
Speaker 8: I told him he could do whatever he wanted if

666
00:30:36,640 --> 00:30:38,520
Speaker 8: he wanted to leave, I wasn't going to stop him.

667
00:30:38,880 --> 00:30:40,760
Speaker 8: He said his cousin was going to come get him.

668
00:30:41,040 --> 00:30:44,080
Speaker 8: He walked away and left the clothes there, which is

669
00:30:44,120 --> 00:30:47,200
Speaker 8: not what you do. When you leave someplace, you usually

670
00:30:47,240 --> 00:30:48,680
Speaker 8: take some clothes with you.

671
00:30:49,240 --> 00:30:50,080
Speaker 3: Oh this guy.

672
00:30:50,360 --> 00:30:53,680
Speaker 8: Eventually he tried to have another talk about how sorry

673
00:30:53,680 --> 00:30:57,280
Speaker 8: he was, not for cheating, because he didn't cheat, but

674
00:30:57,720 --> 00:31:01,719
Speaker 8: for not telling me about the situation he was in. Sooner,

675
00:31:02,240 --> 00:31:04,440
Speaker 8: I asked him if he was sorry for the previous

676
00:31:04,520 --> 00:31:07,840
Speaker 8: cheating and the lying. I had laid out everything he'd

677
00:31:07,840 --> 00:31:10,880
Speaker 8: put me through since the very first lie and asked

678
00:31:10,880 --> 00:31:14,120
Speaker 8: if he was sorry. It was like pulling teeth to

679
00:31:14,160 --> 00:31:16,800
Speaker 8: get him to say he was Then I told him

680
00:31:16,840 --> 00:31:21,040
Speaker 8: I wanted a divorce the way this man cried and sobbed.

681
00:31:21,680 --> 00:31:24,560
Speaker 8: I just walked away. He went into the kitchen and

682
00:31:24,600 --> 00:31:31,160
Speaker 8: started throwing a tantrum. He grabbed a sharp object and

683
00:31:31,400 --> 00:31:34,280
Speaker 8: threatened himself with it. I backed out of the room

684
00:31:34,440 --> 00:31:36,760
Speaker 8: and called nine one one. He tried to get me

685
00:31:36,760 --> 00:31:39,880
Speaker 8: to stop. I screamed at him to leave the room

686
00:31:39,920 --> 00:31:41,920
Speaker 8: I was in. And while I was explaining what was

687
00:31:41,920 --> 00:31:44,680
Speaker 8: happening to the operator, he was in the kitchen saying

688
00:31:44,760 --> 00:31:47,560
Speaker 8: I was wrong and that I'm lying. I shut myself

689
00:31:47,640 --> 00:31:50,160
Speaker 8: in my son's room and waited for the police to come.

690
00:31:50,560 --> 00:31:53,400
Speaker 8: I hear him leave, and at first he took the

691
00:31:53,400 --> 00:31:56,640
Speaker 8: car and left. Then he came back and his cousin

692
00:31:56,720 --> 00:31:58,960
Speaker 8: showed up. They stood outside and.

693
00:31:58,920 --> 00:32:02,479
Speaker 3: Waited, Okay, wouldn't you just make a run for it.

694
00:32:02,880 --> 00:32:06,400
Speaker 7: This has gone way off the rails because.

695
00:32:06,040 --> 00:32:08,360
Speaker 1: He got caught in a lie, and he still won't

696
00:32:08,400 --> 00:32:09,320
Speaker 1: say you caught me.

697
00:32:09,640 --> 00:32:12,080
Speaker 8: I think maybe he was gonna run. And then he

698
00:32:12,160 --> 00:32:15,360
Speaker 8: came back. He came back in the car, he left

699
00:32:15,480 --> 00:32:16,280
Speaker 8: and came back.

700
00:32:16,760 --> 00:32:20,200
Speaker 3: Dudeude, you keep going at that, then nothing's making sense.

701
00:32:20,200 --> 00:32:20,320
Speaker 8: There.

702
00:32:20,320 --> 00:32:22,320
Speaker 3: Does he have a brain, I don't know.

703
00:32:22,400 --> 00:32:22,720
Speaker 7: Man.

704
00:32:23,080 --> 00:32:25,680
Speaker 8: When the police arrived, they talked to him and his

705
00:32:25,880 --> 00:32:29,320
Speaker 8: cousin first. When they spoke to me inside the house,

706
00:32:29,800 --> 00:32:32,320
Speaker 8: they claimed he said he was just cooking, and I

707
00:32:32,520 --> 00:32:35,360
Speaker 8: was confused. He had taken out some food from the

708
00:32:35,400 --> 00:32:37,480
Speaker 8: fridge before he left and put it on the counter

709
00:32:37,600 --> 00:32:40,520
Speaker 8: where he had been standing. I told the officer what

710
00:32:40,680 --> 00:32:44,200
Speaker 8: really happened, and he asked me what I wanted. I

711
00:32:44,240 --> 00:32:46,880
Speaker 8: said I wanted them to take his keys and make

712
00:32:46,920 --> 00:32:50,280
Speaker 8: him leave. They asked if he lived here. I told him.

713
00:32:50,280 --> 00:32:52,720
Speaker 8: He said he was leaving, but his name is on

714
00:32:52,840 --> 00:32:56,320
Speaker 8: our lease. They went and spoke to him, then asked

715
00:32:56,360 --> 00:32:58,520
Speaker 8: if he could just come in and take.

716
00:32:58,360 --> 00:32:59,280
Speaker 7: The rest of his stuff.

717
00:32:59,600 --> 00:33:02,360
Speaker 8: I said that was okay. I went and stood out

718
00:33:02,360 --> 00:33:05,040
Speaker 8: of the way and said nothing. He and his cousin

719
00:33:05,080 --> 00:33:07,880
Speaker 8: came in and started getting his clothes and things. The

720
00:33:07,960 --> 00:33:11,920
Speaker 8: officer stood nearby my piece of crap. Axe was laughing

721
00:33:12,040 --> 00:33:15,640
Speaker 8: and chatting with his cousin like everything was okay. He

722
00:33:15,760 --> 00:33:17,840
Speaker 8: was trying to act like I was the crazy one,

723
00:33:18,400 --> 00:33:21,200
Speaker 8: but it just came off as weird given the situation.

724
00:33:21,680 --> 00:33:24,479
Speaker 8: Ben he left, I called my sister and asked her

725
00:33:24,520 --> 00:33:26,440
Speaker 8: to stay the night because I was afraid he would

726
00:33:26,440 --> 00:33:29,760
Speaker 8: come back, and I started telling her everything. I broke down.

727
00:33:30,200 --> 00:33:34,040
Speaker 8: Finally my eyes were opened. She said she would help me.

728
00:33:34,280 --> 00:33:36,960
Speaker 8: She and I could get a place together. She keeps

729
00:33:37,040 --> 00:33:39,600
Speaker 8: asking if I'm sure I don't want to make it work,

730
00:33:39,880 --> 00:33:43,000
Speaker 8: But I don't think she's trying to get me to stay. Okay,

731
00:33:43,040 --> 00:33:46,640
Speaker 8: she's trying to make sure I'm one hundred percent about

732
00:33:46,760 --> 00:33:50,560
Speaker 8: getting divorced, and I am got.

733
00:33:50,280 --> 00:33:52,800
Speaker 3: It, got it? Okay, Okay, that makes a lot more sense,

734
00:33:52,800 --> 00:33:56,520
Speaker 3: which clearly you do if you do not feel safe

735
00:33:56,520 --> 00:33:59,360
Speaker 3: in the same room or house. Is this man get

736
00:33:59,360 --> 00:34:03,720
Speaker 3: out of here. It's time he pulled this again. He's

737
00:34:03,760 --> 00:34:06,239
Speaker 3: never pulled us again before. It's crazy how people just

738
00:34:06,680 --> 00:34:10,400
Speaker 3: react this way and go all ballistic all of a sudden.

739
00:34:10,640 --> 00:34:15,319
Speaker 8: Yeah, man, very Uh well, he's finally being held accountable. Yeah,

740
00:34:15,719 --> 00:34:20,240
Speaker 8: it's happened before, and now op, he's like, I'm done,

741
00:34:20,840 --> 00:34:24,880
Speaker 8: and he's literally having a full blown nuclear meltdown over.

742
00:34:24,719 --> 00:34:28,160
Speaker 3: It and going crazy, acting like nothing's happening. Put food

743
00:34:28,160 --> 00:34:29,200
Speaker 3: out on the counter, and.

744
00:34:29,200 --> 00:34:35,960
Speaker 8: It's nobody but his fault, his fault. Yeah, okay, let's

745
00:34:35,960 --> 00:34:39,120
Speaker 8: finish this story. My main problem is he called me

746
00:34:39,200 --> 00:34:42,399
Speaker 8: today and threatened to take our car. We have two.

747
00:34:43,040 --> 00:34:46,160
Speaker 8: One is in the shop and we've been sharing the other.

748
00:34:46,680 --> 00:34:49,440
Speaker 8: The one in the shop is my car with only

749
00:34:49,480 --> 00:34:51,800
Speaker 8: my name on the title. The other has both of

750
00:34:51,840 --> 00:34:54,360
Speaker 8: our names on it. He threatened to take the working

751
00:34:54,400 --> 00:34:57,720
Speaker 8: car and refused to take his name off the lease.

752
00:34:58,239 --> 00:35:00,640
Speaker 7: He didn't like that I already had my lined up

753
00:35:00,680 --> 00:35:03,960
Speaker 7: as a roommate. He threatened me by saying two weeks.

754
00:35:04,560 --> 00:35:07,040
Speaker 8: I asked him what he meant, but he just said

755
00:35:07,120 --> 00:35:10,120
Speaker 8: we could talk about dividing up the furniture, who would

756
00:35:10,160 --> 00:35:13,080
Speaker 8: take what car and who would pay what bill?

757
00:35:13,160 --> 00:35:14,680
Speaker 7: Then, but I could tell.

758
00:35:14,480 --> 00:35:16,719
Speaker 8: What he really meant was, you have two weeks to

759
00:35:16,760 --> 00:35:20,080
Speaker 8: come back to me or I'll start really getting nasty.

760
00:35:21,160 --> 00:35:24,319
Speaker 8: I'm terrified of doing this alone, but I refuse to

761
00:35:24,320 --> 00:35:27,480
Speaker 8: give in and go back. My grandfather has been offering

762
00:35:27,520 --> 00:35:30,720
Speaker 8: me a house he owns for years with no rent.

763
00:35:31,120 --> 00:35:33,879
Speaker 8: The only problem is he lives several states away. Girl,

764
00:35:33,920 --> 00:35:35,799
Speaker 8: that's no problem. That's a great problem to have.

765
00:35:36,080 --> 00:35:38,280
Speaker 3: Probably you're out there new life.

766
00:35:38,040 --> 00:35:40,800
Speaker 7: Grandpa's house, new life. I wasn't willing to leave.

767
00:35:40,680 --> 00:35:43,480
Speaker 8: The state before, but I'll do that before I let

768
00:35:43,719 --> 00:35:45,080
Speaker 8: my ex try to control me.

769
00:35:45,600 --> 00:35:49,960
Speaker 7: With the lease yea, and that is the end of

770
00:35:50,000 --> 00:35:50,479
Speaker 7: that story.

771
00:35:50,480 --> 00:35:52,640
Speaker 3: It seems like you got a window to a new life.

772
00:35:52,719 --> 00:35:56,400
Speaker 3: It might be time to do that. Sucks, it's hard,

773
00:35:56,520 --> 00:35:59,120
Speaker 3: but you gotta do what you gotta do to keep safe.

774
00:35:59,200 --> 00:36:00,839
Speaker 3: And this is what you got to do in these

775
00:36:01,440 --> 00:36:03,960
Speaker 3: life You can't You can't buy a house now for

776
00:36:04,000 --> 00:36:08,239
Speaker 3: seventy grand anymore like Grandma did. Hey it's Sam.

777
00:36:08,280 --> 00:36:10,200
Speaker 1: We're gonna get back to these stories. But here's three

778
00:36:10,200 --> 00:36:11,840
Speaker 1: bites of ads from our sponsors.

779
00:36:12,120 --> 00:36:15,200
Speaker 3: I discovered my wife's hit in chat with another man.

780
00:36:15,560 --> 00:36:18,279
Speaker 7: That's bad news, bears my guy.

781
00:36:19,320 --> 00:36:23,360
Speaker 3: My wife female forty nine, and I Mail fifty don't

782
00:36:23,400 --> 00:36:27,359
Speaker 3: have anything to hide, so or I thought, and have

783
00:36:27,520 --> 00:36:30,560
Speaker 3: access to each other's phones if needed. I needed her

784
00:36:30,600 --> 00:36:33,799
Speaker 3: phone to rearrange an appointment, as all the details were

785
00:36:33,800 --> 00:36:36,120
Speaker 3: on it. I had to come off the page to

786
00:36:36,160 --> 00:36:39,680
Speaker 3: get her number and open WhatsApp as I thought that's

787
00:36:39,680 --> 00:36:42,560
Speaker 3: where the info was. And I saw a chat that

788
00:36:42,680 --> 00:36:45,440
Speaker 3: you read and didn't reply to. By the way, this

789
00:36:45,560 --> 00:36:48,200
Speaker 3: comes from fun Bluebird twenty six and a few nice

790
00:36:48,200 --> 00:36:49,920
Speaker 3: to me your own stories? What the r slade show?

791
00:36:49,920 --> 00:36:52,640
Speaker 3: Okay stories, I'm subred. Nope, he says checked back in

792
00:36:52,680 --> 00:36:55,759
Speaker 3: a few days later and it was gone. But then

793
00:36:55,920 --> 00:36:59,000
Speaker 3: I saw a locked chat icon and opened it and

794
00:36:59,080 --> 00:37:02,880
Speaker 3: there was the chat, and she replied just the usual

795
00:37:03,120 --> 00:37:05,960
Speaker 3: how are you and left it at that. Checked again

796
00:37:06,000 --> 00:37:08,879
Speaker 3: two days later and there was more chat and he

797
00:37:09,000 --> 00:37:12,160
Speaker 3: was asking to meet for coffee, which she hasn't said

798
00:37:12,360 --> 00:37:16,160
Speaker 3: yes or no. Two and that's when you replying yes

799
00:37:16,360 --> 00:37:19,719
Speaker 3: and you show up sneaky. I have no clue who

800
00:37:19,719 --> 00:37:22,200
Speaker 3: he is, as he is on her social media friends

801
00:37:22,400 --> 00:37:25,759
Speaker 3: or phone contacts, and it's his first name only, so

802
00:37:25,840 --> 00:37:29,160
Speaker 3: I'm guessing an ex. I'm more than positive she's been

803
00:37:29,200 --> 00:37:33,120
Speaker 3: faithful since we've both been together. I did check search history,

804
00:37:33,160 --> 00:37:36,160
Speaker 3: and his name she has two other contacts with full names,

805
00:37:36,160 --> 00:37:38,840
Speaker 3: so this couldn't be a coincidence. Was in the search

806
00:37:38,920 --> 00:37:42,200
Speaker 3: history a few weeks before the message, so I don't

807
00:37:42,200 --> 00:37:45,080
Speaker 3: know if she's had his contact details before then and

808
00:37:45,120 --> 00:37:48,480
Speaker 3: then deleted him. Really need advice on how to ask

809
00:37:48,560 --> 00:37:51,920
Speaker 3: about this, as I will probably go through and accuse

810
00:37:51,960 --> 00:37:54,080
Speaker 3: her of having an affair, which I don't have any

811
00:37:54,080 --> 00:37:57,399
Speaker 3: proof of. And we have an update, I mean, get more,

812
00:37:57,920 --> 00:38:01,200
Speaker 3: get more in there. And Opie's fifty and his wife

813
00:38:01,239 --> 00:38:02,080
Speaker 3: is forty nine.

814
00:38:02,560 --> 00:38:07,120
Speaker 7: I don't understand why. None of that screams bad to me.

815
00:38:07,920 --> 00:38:13,040
Speaker 8: But like you digging through her phone, you've got to

816
00:38:13,120 --> 00:38:16,880
Speaker 8: have some level of suspicion if you want to do that.

817
00:38:17,239 --> 00:38:19,520
Speaker 3: Well, we went through the phone trying to find some documents.

818
00:38:19,640 --> 00:38:20,759
Speaker 7: I don't know, but then he went back.

819
00:38:20,800 --> 00:38:22,520
Speaker 8: He's like, I went back two days later, and I

820
00:38:22,560 --> 00:38:25,480
Speaker 8: went back three days suspicion, but.

821
00:38:25,480 --> 00:38:27,840
Speaker 7: It was just it seemed so normal.

822
00:38:28,520 --> 00:38:32,360
Speaker 3: Yeah, I think she's cheating, dakotam.

823
00:38:32,920 --> 00:38:37,719
Speaker 8: I mean the deleting and the hidden Why why do

824
00:38:37,760 --> 00:38:39,880
Speaker 8: you have locked hidden chats with anybody?

825
00:38:40,160 --> 00:38:43,120
Speaker 3: That's what happens when you cheat. So update, My wife

826
00:38:43,160 --> 00:38:46,000
Speaker 3: went out the night. I asked for advice, and I

827
00:38:46,040 --> 00:38:48,640
Speaker 3: had a link to her WhatsApp account to my work phone,

828
00:38:48,880 --> 00:38:52,440
Speaker 3: but I could see any messages she sends and receives. Crappy,

829
00:38:52,520 --> 00:38:56,120
Speaker 3: I know, but I had to. She sent one message

830
00:38:56,160 --> 00:38:58,440
Speaker 3: at night she went out and you never read it

831
00:38:59,000 --> 00:39:02,839
Speaker 3: and later deleted it early the next day. He wasn't

832
00:39:02,840 --> 00:39:05,560
Speaker 3: in contact until later the next night, and there were

833
00:39:05,600 --> 00:39:08,719
Speaker 3: a few more messages. It was friendly chat until the

834
00:39:08,800 --> 00:39:11,880
Speaker 3: last message from him, although I didn't open it. It

835
00:39:12,040 --> 00:39:15,480
Speaker 3: was spicy related. Going by the first line that you

836
00:39:15,520 --> 00:39:19,000
Speaker 3: see without opening it, and what he wanted to do

837
00:39:19,120 --> 00:39:24,120
Speaker 3: to her. Oh, I want to take your clothes off

838
00:39:24,160 --> 00:39:27,000
Speaker 3: and take it to a nice spa, or you'll be

839
00:39:27,040 --> 00:39:30,160
Speaker 3: there alone. Maybe that's the first part he saw. They

840
00:39:30,160 --> 00:39:32,920
Speaker 3: didn't read that next half, you know, and pay for

841
00:39:32,960 --> 00:39:35,040
Speaker 3: your spaw so you have a nice time alone and

842
00:39:35,080 --> 00:39:37,040
Speaker 3: get really relaxed because you've been tensed up.

843
00:39:37,480 --> 00:39:41,520
Speaker 8: I think, regardless of whatever's going on in these texts,

844
00:39:41,719 --> 00:39:45,000
Speaker 8: if you're linking your wife's WhatsApp to your phone so

845
00:39:45,040 --> 00:39:47,680
Speaker 8: you can snoop on all the messages that she sends,

846
00:39:48,160 --> 00:39:53,200
Speaker 8: y'all already have real big problems with trust and communication.

847
00:39:53,440 --> 00:39:56,160
Speaker 3: Yeah, taking the monster out of the equation, and I agree.

848
00:39:56,480 --> 00:40:00,000
Speaker 3: She read and deleted all the chats around nine am.

849
00:40:00,000 --> 00:40:02,640
Speaker 3: I was checking constantly at work. We're on a city

850
00:40:02,680 --> 00:40:05,360
Speaker 3: break a few days later, and I confronted her after

851
00:40:05,400 --> 00:40:08,040
Speaker 3: having a few too many drinks. She was in the

852
00:40:08,120 --> 00:40:10,480
Speaker 3: shower and I told her I knew about the chats.

853
00:40:10,719 --> 00:40:13,080
Speaker 3: She came out and said that he was an old

854
00:40:13,080 --> 00:40:15,840
Speaker 3: friend and that she has never cheated on me, but

855
00:40:15,920 --> 00:40:20,000
Speaker 3: could have wow, wow and cold. I could have ran

856
00:40:20,080 --> 00:40:22,160
Speaker 3: over you with the car the other day, but I didn't.

857
00:40:22,880 --> 00:40:24,040
Speaker 1: It isn't free will cool.

858
00:40:24,280 --> 00:40:28,600
Speaker 8: Yeah, that's maybe one of the worst ways that she

859
00:40:28,680 --> 00:40:29,640
Speaker 8: could have responded.

860
00:40:30,120 --> 00:40:33,680
Speaker 3: Yeah. I told her that I now had doubts about

861
00:40:33,719 --> 00:40:36,360
Speaker 3: the time she went out and when she went to

862
00:40:36,440 --> 00:40:39,720
Speaker 3: the gym some things were said and that she wasn't

863
00:40:39,760 --> 00:40:43,080
Speaker 3: doing this here and wait till we got home, so

864
00:40:43,520 --> 00:40:46,120
Speaker 3: it wasn't mentioned again. We were going to talk today

865
00:40:46,160 --> 00:40:48,319
Speaker 3: after we got back, but ended up going out with

866
00:40:48,360 --> 00:40:49,839
Speaker 3: the family. So never have the chance.

867
00:40:49,880 --> 00:40:50,640
Speaker 7: Are you kidding me?

868
00:40:51,320 --> 00:40:53,480
Speaker 3: I think you could wait about going your wife.

869
00:40:53,160 --> 00:40:56,440
Speaker 8: Tells you while we're on our trip, don't We're not

870
00:40:56,480 --> 00:40:58,399
Speaker 8: going to talk about how I just said I would

871
00:40:58,480 --> 00:40:59,080
Speaker 8: cheat on you.

872
00:40:59,040 --> 00:41:02,560
Speaker 7: At the drop of a hat, or I could. Yeah, Witch, shut.

873
00:41:02,400 --> 00:41:05,759
Speaker 8: Up, and let's enjoy the rest of our time in Cleveland.

874
00:41:06,120 --> 00:41:09,520
Speaker 3: Lebron's planned What's wrong with Cleveland? It wasn't until later

875
00:41:09,600 --> 00:41:11,520
Speaker 3: that week and I asked if we were going to

876
00:41:11,520 --> 00:41:14,560
Speaker 3: be all right? She said, she doesn't know. You should

877
00:41:14,560 --> 00:41:16,279
Speaker 3: be the one asking if you're going to be all right?

878
00:41:16,400 --> 00:41:19,800
Speaker 3: OPI what we have done this so many times before.

879
00:41:20,360 --> 00:41:23,480
Speaker 3: Don't get on, patch things up for a while, sayble,

880
00:41:23,560 --> 00:41:27,000
Speaker 3: make changes, then don't rinse and repeat. The only thing

881
00:41:27,080 --> 00:41:29,719
Speaker 3: different this time was the chance. She told me that

882
00:41:30,120 --> 00:41:32,800
Speaker 3: even in a full house of people, she is lonely.

883
00:41:33,200 --> 00:41:35,600
Speaker 3: Kids rarely come out of the rooms. I said, on

884
00:41:35,600 --> 00:41:39,440
Speaker 3: one couch, she's on another, being taken for granted, being ignored,

885
00:41:39,480 --> 00:41:42,560
Speaker 3: amongst other things. We really didn't speak about the chants

886
00:41:42,600 --> 00:41:45,799
Speaker 3: even and eventually went to bed and I was up

887
00:41:46,080 --> 00:41:48,319
Speaker 3: early for work. The next day, she sent me a

888
00:41:48,360 --> 00:41:51,480
Speaker 3: text asking how I was, and I told her I've

889
00:41:51,520 --> 00:41:54,040
Speaker 3: never felt so down and hurt that the marriage is

890
00:41:54,080 --> 00:41:57,920
Speaker 3: possibly ending. So we made plans out the following Saturday

891
00:41:58,160 --> 00:42:00,680
Speaker 3: to talk things out, and everything was fine for a

892
00:42:00,719 --> 00:42:04,120
Speaker 3: few days until she sent a pic of the gym

893
00:42:04,440 --> 00:42:06,560
Speaker 3: and it threw me. She came back from the gym

894
00:42:06,840 --> 00:42:09,279
Speaker 3: and I was tightening up, and the kids were out

895
00:42:09,280 --> 00:42:11,680
Speaker 3: playing in the back and I shouted at them to

896
00:42:11,719 --> 00:42:13,799
Speaker 3: be quiet. I knew I had to get out of

897
00:42:13,800 --> 00:42:15,600
Speaker 3: the house, so I went for a walk to clear

898
00:42:15,640 --> 00:42:17,840
Speaker 3: my head. I would be okay for a few days,

899
00:42:18,200 --> 00:42:20,719
Speaker 3: then it would hit me again. I would start to

900
00:42:20,719 --> 00:42:24,359
Speaker 3: think about the chats. WhatsApp updated and I logged out

901
00:42:24,400 --> 00:42:27,520
Speaker 3: of the account, even though he wasn't in contact since

902
00:42:27,600 --> 00:42:30,560
Speaker 3: the last message due to being blocked, and my wife

903
00:42:30,600 --> 00:42:32,960
Speaker 3: changed her pass code to her phone. One of the

904
00:42:32,960 --> 00:42:36,760
Speaker 3: things I said was I wouldn't trust her if she did,

905
00:42:37,239 --> 00:42:41,400
Speaker 3: but she did anyway, So you had a conversation you

906
00:42:42,080 --> 00:42:44,920
Speaker 3: keep hiding this for me or you know, not showing

907
00:42:44,960 --> 00:42:47,239
Speaker 3: me what you're doing, I'm not gonna have trust in you.

908
00:42:47,280 --> 00:42:50,600
Speaker 3: And she proceeds to do that activity like.

909
00:42:50,560 --> 00:42:53,520
Speaker 7: Babe, shut up, you're so cringey. There's nothing going on.

910
00:42:53,560 --> 00:42:56,320
Speaker 8: I'm just changing my passwords to my log and information

911
00:42:56,480 --> 00:43:00,080
Speaker 8: for everything that you could possibly see any evidence on.

912
00:43:00,560 --> 00:43:05,000
Speaker 3: Yeah, and the gym pick things seemed a little passive aggressive, like, look,

913
00:43:05,000 --> 00:43:07,759
Speaker 3: I'm at the gym. I'm not cheating on you. Click yeah.

914
00:43:07,880 --> 00:43:11,480
Speaker 8: Where it's like you could have taken that whenever Again,

915
00:43:11,560 --> 00:43:14,440
Speaker 8: It's like, it's just I don't know. It's crazy to

916
00:43:14,480 --> 00:43:20,360
Speaker 8: me that she said I could have whenever. M It's like, okay, Honestly,

917
00:43:20,960 --> 00:43:22,800
Speaker 8: at that point, I'm like, why don't you go ahead

918
00:43:22,880 --> 00:43:23,319
Speaker 8: and do it?

919
00:43:23,800 --> 00:43:24,520
Speaker 7: I dare you.

920
00:43:24,960 --> 00:43:29,040
Speaker 8: Yeah, I'm now double dog daring you to go cheat

921
00:43:29,080 --> 00:43:30,000
Speaker 8: on me with this guy.

922
00:43:30,080 --> 00:43:30,600
Speaker 7: Go ahead.

923
00:43:31,000 --> 00:43:32,560
Speaker 3: I don't know if i'd say that.

924
00:43:32,560 --> 00:43:35,440
Speaker 8: That's why I'd say, because I would feel so disrespected

925
00:43:35,480 --> 00:43:37,919
Speaker 8: at that I could have whenever I want it. I'd

926
00:43:37,920 --> 00:43:40,920
Speaker 8: be like, well, right now's a great time. Go ahead,

927
00:43:41,560 --> 00:43:44,560
Speaker 8: Why don't you do it on our weekend trip? Melissa

928
00:43:45,400 --> 00:43:47,560
Speaker 8: whatever her name is, brought to Melissa.

929
00:43:48,200 --> 00:43:51,960
Speaker 3: Yikes. We had another talk and my wife thought we

930
00:43:52,000 --> 00:43:54,560
Speaker 3: had moved on, but I told her it's not that easy.

931
00:43:54,840 --> 00:43:58,000
Speaker 3: Whenever a WhatsApp notification sound on her phone pinged, our

932
00:43:58,040 --> 00:44:01,440
Speaker 3: heart skipped the beat. Not a good It felt like

933
00:44:01,719 --> 00:44:04,319
Speaker 3: every time I left the room or house, she was

934
00:44:04,360 --> 00:44:07,759
Speaker 3: on WhatsApp. She ended up deleting it and reinstalling it,

935
00:44:08,000 --> 00:44:11,160
Speaker 3: but that didn't help, as all chats got deleted, even

936
00:44:11,200 --> 00:44:14,480
Speaker 3: the kids ones. Okay. One Sunday, I asked why she

937
00:44:14,640 --> 00:44:17,319
Speaker 3: changed the password, and she wanted to know why I

938
00:44:17,360 --> 00:44:20,799
Speaker 3: wanted her access to her phone, and voices were raised.

939
00:44:20,880 --> 00:44:23,799
Speaker 8: Hey, silly goose, remember when you told me you could

940
00:44:23,800 --> 00:44:26,479
Speaker 8: have cheated on me whenever you wanted, and you kept

941
00:44:26,640 --> 00:44:29,120
Speaker 8: entertaining messages from the guy you could have cheated on

942
00:44:29,200 --> 00:44:32,640
Speaker 8: me with. That's why I want to see your messages, genius.

943
00:44:32,840 --> 00:44:35,400
Speaker 3: She was going to cancel a keyp fit course she

944
00:44:35,440 --> 00:44:37,960
Speaker 3: had previously been booked on. I told her to go

945
00:44:38,000 --> 00:44:40,279
Speaker 3: to it. I kept a note on how I was

946
00:44:40,320 --> 00:44:42,880
Speaker 3: feeling since I found the chats, and when I was

947
00:44:42,920 --> 00:44:46,480
Speaker 3: going over them. I decided to f everything and went

948
00:44:46,520 --> 00:44:49,279
Speaker 3: for a walk, leaving my phone. When she came back,

949
00:44:49,360 --> 00:44:51,720
Speaker 3: she phoned and texted my phone, which was in the house.

950
00:44:52,120 --> 00:44:54,880
Speaker 3: She read my notes I had shown her previously and

951
00:44:55,040 --> 00:44:57,640
Speaker 3: was worried about the last message. I had my work

952
00:44:57,680 --> 00:44:59,480
Speaker 3: phone with me, but it was set up to not

953
00:44:59,480 --> 00:45:02,680
Speaker 3: show mesas or phone calls, which I didn't know at

954
00:45:02,680 --> 00:45:05,040
Speaker 3: the time. She did come looking for me, and I

955
00:45:05,120 --> 00:45:08,600
Speaker 3: was at the pub. She saw me left. Once she

956
00:45:08,719 --> 00:45:11,400
Speaker 3: knew I was fine, she got the wrong idea and

957
00:45:11,440 --> 00:45:14,080
Speaker 3: thought I would be lying in a field somewhere. I

958
00:45:14,160 --> 00:45:17,200
Speaker 3: told her that I would never do that. Oh my gosh.

959
00:45:17,360 --> 00:45:19,640
Speaker 3: Then I decided that I couldn't go on like this

960
00:45:19,800 --> 00:45:22,640
Speaker 3: and if I didn't get an answer, then it was over.

961
00:45:23,160 --> 00:45:25,640
Speaker 3: Over the next few days, she would message me and

962
00:45:25,719 --> 00:45:28,720
Speaker 3: I would give one word answers, and then I said

963
00:45:28,719 --> 00:45:31,799
Speaker 3: that I needed to know everything. She eventually replied with

964
00:45:31,960 --> 00:45:33,759
Speaker 3: you sure you want to know this at work? And

965
00:45:33,800 --> 00:45:37,319
Speaker 3: I said yes. It didn't happen, but then later that

966
00:45:37,480 --> 00:45:41,080
Speaker 3: night we went through the local park and had it

967
00:45:41,120 --> 00:45:44,000
Speaker 3: typed on her phone before handing it over and leaving

968
00:45:44,040 --> 00:45:46,839
Speaker 3: me to read it. She said nothing happened. She went

969
00:45:46,880 --> 00:45:49,000
Speaker 3: on the holiday last year with friends and family and

970
00:45:49,040 --> 00:45:51,760
Speaker 3: met up with different groups. Now Ever since the VID,

971
00:45:51,840 --> 00:45:54,680
Speaker 3: my wife has been working from home, so any chance

972
00:45:54,719 --> 00:45:57,680
Speaker 3: she gets talking to someone, she'll take it, and in

973
00:45:57,719 --> 00:46:01,040
Speaker 3: this case it was this guy. They things in common,

974
00:46:01,680 --> 00:46:05,120
Speaker 3: like the same music, movies, walking. She did say there

975
00:46:05,200 --> 00:46:08,319
Speaker 3: was an attraction, but the last message ruined that as

976
00:46:08,360 --> 00:46:11,800
Speaker 3: it was a friendship for her and he wanted more. Also,

977
00:46:12,239 --> 00:46:15,879
Speaker 3: how did opinon know about this guy? You know, it's

978
00:46:15,920 --> 00:46:18,480
Speaker 3: okay to have friends and have people to be you know,

979
00:46:18,600 --> 00:46:22,400
Speaker 3: someone in common with, but how do you not communicate that.

980
00:46:22,920 --> 00:46:25,359
Speaker 8: I don't know. It feels like she's just trying to

981
00:46:25,440 --> 00:46:29,440
Speaker 8: like justify this, but it's like communicate with your freaking husband.

982
00:46:29,800 --> 00:46:32,440
Speaker 3: When I said I found the chat, she panicked and

983
00:46:32,480 --> 00:46:35,799
Speaker 3: said it was someone she knew for years. She did

984
00:46:35,880 --> 00:46:38,680
Speaker 3: say that this will probably be the end of the marriage.

985
00:46:39,120 --> 00:46:42,080
Speaker 3: Once I read it, it was a relief everything was out.

986
00:46:42,320 --> 00:46:44,440
Speaker 3: When I went to find her, I gave her back

987
00:46:44,440 --> 00:46:47,160
Speaker 3: her phone and also my wedding ring as a joke,

988
00:46:47,440 --> 00:46:50,080
Speaker 3: and she burst out crying, hugged me and said sorry

989
00:46:50,080 --> 00:46:50,839
Speaker 3: for the stupid joke.

990
00:46:51,280 --> 00:46:54,759
Speaker 7: Her joke, your joke. Whose joke? She made a joke?

991
00:46:55,440 --> 00:46:56,120
Speaker 7: What's the joke.

992
00:46:56,680 --> 00:47:02,520
Speaker 8: I I both of you divorce, divorce, your children, don't

993
00:47:02,560 --> 00:47:05,600
Speaker 8: leave their rooms because your marriage is horrific and no

994
00:47:05,640 --> 00:47:06,799
Speaker 8: one wants to be around it.

995
00:47:07,840 --> 00:47:11,160
Speaker 3: We talked and ironed a few things out. Turns out

996
00:47:11,719 --> 00:47:14,480
Speaker 3: he stays in a different country in the UK, so

997
00:47:14,680 --> 00:47:17,799
Speaker 3: no idea how we wanted to meet for drinks as

998
00:47:17,840 --> 00:47:19,799
Speaker 3: it was a few hundred miles away, so we got

999
00:47:19,840 --> 00:47:21,520
Speaker 3: a little bit left here. Any other thoughts?

1000
00:47:21,840 --> 00:47:25,960
Speaker 8: If you taking off your wedding ring, she says, She says,

1001
00:47:26,040 --> 00:47:28,240
Speaker 8: I think this will probably be the end of the marriage.

1002
00:47:28,640 --> 00:47:30,880
Speaker 8: And then you take off your wedding ring and response

1003
00:47:30,920 --> 00:47:33,000
Speaker 8: to it and give it back to her, and then

1004
00:47:33,120 --> 00:47:35,040
Speaker 8: she's like, I'm sorry I made that joke.

1005
00:47:35,480 --> 00:47:37,600
Speaker 7: First of all, I don't think she was freaking joking.

1006
00:47:37,920 --> 00:47:41,040
Speaker 8: Yeah, I think she And I think again, this all

1007
00:47:41,080 --> 00:47:45,200
Speaker 8: goes back to if my wife ever said to me,

1008
00:47:45,800 --> 00:47:48,560
Speaker 8: I'm like, I found these chats. What's going on here?

1009
00:47:48,960 --> 00:47:51,080
Speaker 8: These are suspicious to me? Are you cheating on me?

1010
00:47:51,440 --> 00:47:53,440
Speaker 8: He goes, No, I'm not cheating on you, but I

1011
00:47:53,480 --> 00:47:57,080
Speaker 8: could cheat on you whenever I want. I would immediately go,

1012
00:47:57,840 --> 00:48:00,480
Speaker 8: would you look at the time, it's.

1013
00:48:00,320 --> 00:48:01,520
Speaker 7: Time for you to cheat on me?

1014
00:48:01,840 --> 00:48:06,480
Speaker 8: Yuh, go ahead. I would love to see that. It's

1015
00:48:06,560 --> 00:48:07,680
Speaker 8: never coming back from that.

1016
00:48:07,760 --> 00:48:09,160
Speaker 3: I don't really feel like they got a lot of

1017
00:48:09,200 --> 00:48:11,959
Speaker 3: good ways to communicate with each other or talk about

1018
00:48:11,960 --> 00:48:14,759
Speaker 3: how they actually feel that it's just kind of sweeping

1019
00:48:14,920 --> 00:48:17,920
Speaker 3: it under the rug. Well, so we went out the

1020
00:48:18,040 --> 00:48:21,239
Speaker 3: Saturday after for food and drinks and had one of

1021
00:48:21,280 --> 00:48:23,560
Speaker 3: the best days out in a long time. We not

1022
00:48:23,600 --> 00:48:28,640
Speaker 3: only talked but had conversations. Usually we finish eating, we pay,

1023
00:48:28,719 --> 00:48:31,000
Speaker 3: and leave, but we stayed at the table, drinking and

1024
00:48:31,040 --> 00:48:34,040
Speaker 3: talking for about two hours after eating. Quite surprised they

1025
00:48:34,120 --> 00:48:36,960
Speaker 3: didn't ask for the table to be vacated. We went

1026
00:48:37,040 --> 00:48:40,000
Speaker 3: to a few other pubs too, so in all, a

1027
00:48:40,040 --> 00:48:43,319
Speaker 3: good time was had. We now have date nights every

1028
00:48:43,400 --> 00:48:46,800
Speaker 3: Saturday I'm off work if we have someone to watch

1029
00:48:46,840 --> 00:48:49,520
Speaker 3: the youngest. If not, we'll go to cinema with him,

1030
00:48:50,080 --> 00:48:52,400
Speaker 3: just to spend time together. We've been on a holiday

1031
00:48:52,440 --> 00:48:55,000
Speaker 3: three times this year, and concerts too. It's been a

1032
00:48:55,000 --> 00:48:57,360
Speaker 3: good six months. Don't get me wrong. There have been

1033
00:48:57,400 --> 00:49:00,880
Speaker 3: a few disagreements too, but not the major so it

1034
00:49:00,960 --> 00:49:04,880
Speaker 3: seems like they turned it around. I agree. Someone said too,

1035
00:49:04,920 --> 00:49:07,000
Speaker 3: they're old enough to kind of figure this out themselves.

1036
00:49:07,440 --> 00:49:09,560
Speaker 3: I thought that they would kind of.

1037
00:49:09,760 --> 00:49:13,400
Speaker 8: Figured it out, maybe maybe taking that into account to

1038
00:49:13,719 --> 00:49:19,080
Speaker 8: make it a little different. But I really I think

1039
00:49:19,200 --> 00:49:21,640
Speaker 8: you guys would have to move forward with complete open

1040
00:49:21,680 --> 00:49:22,600
Speaker 8: phone policy.

1041
00:49:23,120 --> 00:49:28,600
Speaker 3: Well, I think open communication because little things are happening. Hey,

1042
00:49:28,640 --> 00:49:31,080
Speaker 3: the kids are in the rooms. I'm sitting on that couch,

1043
00:49:31,239 --> 00:49:33,799
Speaker 3: you're sitting on that couch. Blah blah blah blah blah

1044
00:49:33,800 --> 00:49:37,440
Speaker 3: blah blah. We're not connecting. I think open communication about

1045
00:49:37,440 --> 00:49:39,560
Speaker 3: that and often so they can connect more. Because it

1046
00:49:39,600 --> 00:49:43,800
Speaker 3: was her, she didn't she she wanted to. I feel

1047
00:49:43,800 --> 00:49:45,680
Speaker 3: like she said, I could have just to get a

1048
00:49:45,719 --> 00:49:47,640
Speaker 3: reaction out of them, just to see what it.

1049
00:49:47,719 --> 00:49:49,320
Speaker 7: Was saying that they had been drinking.

1050
00:49:49,760 --> 00:49:52,120
Speaker 3: Yeah, and also she wanted to see, like how much

1051
00:49:52,160 --> 00:49:54,000
Speaker 3: do I really mean to you? I could have cheated

1052
00:49:54,000 --> 00:49:56,680
Speaker 3: on you because it gets toxic and they're not actually

1053
00:49:57,120 --> 00:49:59,879
Speaker 3: thinking or loving one another because they're in this kind

1054
00:49:59,880 --> 00:50:03,040
Speaker 3: of weird spiral. And let's say you say that, Let's

1055
00:50:03,040 --> 00:50:06,520
Speaker 3: say you say something absolutely ridiculous to your partner and

1056
00:50:06,560 --> 00:50:08,919
Speaker 3: you haven't really even seen emotion out of them. Don't

1057
00:50:08,960 --> 00:50:10,759
Speaker 3: you say that wake them up? That shake them? And

1058
00:50:11,080 --> 00:50:13,160
Speaker 3: it shook them. It shook them up. And guess what,

1059
00:50:13,520 --> 00:50:15,799
Speaker 3: they were more healthier than they've ever been there going

1060
00:50:15,800 --> 00:50:18,799
Speaker 3: out and they're actually enjoying one another. I think this

1061
00:50:18,920 --> 00:50:21,239
Speaker 3: sounds crazy. Hot di Eke. This was the best thing

1062
00:50:21,280 --> 00:50:22,520
Speaker 3: they could have for the relationship.

1063
00:50:23,400 --> 00:50:26,000
Speaker 1: You know, as long as it doesn't rinse, repeat and recycle.

1064
00:50:26,360 --> 00:50:27,640
Speaker 3: I don't think it will. I mean, it's been a

1065
00:50:27,640 --> 00:50:29,719
Speaker 3: good six months. They seem like they enjoy each other

1066
00:50:29,920 --> 00:50:32,880
Speaker 3: through having conversations. I think this was great.

1067
00:50:33,640 --> 00:50:37,880
Speaker 9: My stepfather's son raided our house right after he passed away.

1068
00:50:38,239 --> 00:50:39,920
Speaker 5: That's the worst time to do that.

1069
00:50:40,040 --> 00:50:42,040
Speaker 4: They're taking step out of mom's house.

1070
00:50:42,120 --> 00:50:44,560
Speaker 9: That title is what I heard when I answered a

1071
00:50:44,600 --> 00:50:47,480
Speaker 9: call from my younger brother. For quick context, my stepfather,

1072
00:50:47,640 --> 00:50:51,240
Speaker 9: Jim had liver cancer. My mom needed diaphragm reconstruction. Forgive

1073
00:50:51,280 --> 00:50:53,600
Speaker 9: me if that's not the proper medical term. She was

1074
00:50:53,600 --> 00:50:55,600
Speaker 9: told that she'd be laid up four to six weeks,

1075
00:50:55,600 --> 00:50:58,520
Speaker 9: but Jim wasn't in immediate danger of passing away, so

1076
00:50:58,560 --> 00:51:01,600
Speaker 9: she should go ahead and do it. They were wrong,

1077
00:51:01,960 --> 00:51:05,600
Speaker 9: by the way, this comes from safe shack shit And

1078
00:51:05,640 --> 00:51:07,640
Speaker 9: if you want us to make your own stores, go

1079
00:51:07,719 --> 00:51:09,239
Speaker 9: to the r slash Okay, sorry time, sup.

1080
00:51:09,280 --> 00:51:11,560
Speaker 4: Reddit And I'm Angie, I'm Sophia.

1081
00:51:11,680 --> 00:51:13,719
Speaker 9: Two days after she returned from the hospital and could

1082
00:51:13,760 --> 00:51:17,640
Speaker 9: hardly move, Jim went into hospice and passed away that night.

1083
00:51:18,120 --> 00:51:21,440
Speaker 9: Mom was devastated. Of course, she and Jim had a

1084
00:51:21,440 --> 00:51:24,920
Speaker 9: great marriage. Her first husband, my a whole father, was

1085
00:51:24,960 --> 00:51:25,680
Speaker 9: awful and.

1086
00:51:25,680 --> 00:51:26,359
Speaker 4: Cheated on her.

1087
00:51:26,520 --> 00:51:29,839
Speaker 9: The second was a severe, heavy drinker. Jim was a

1088
00:51:29,840 --> 00:51:34,000
Speaker 9: retired Marine Master gunnery sergeant who was a rough, tough

1089
00:51:34,120 --> 00:51:37,239
Speaker 9: and gruff as any stereotype that title brings to mind.

1090
00:51:37,400 --> 00:51:40,719
Speaker 9: My mom was about as liberal as they come, while Jim.

1091
00:51:40,640 --> 00:51:41,840
Speaker 4: Was well the opposite of that.

1092
00:51:42,120 --> 00:51:44,440
Speaker 9: But they made it work and each worshiped the ground

1093
00:51:44,480 --> 00:51:47,319
Speaker 9: that each other walked on. She'd finally found a good one,

1094
00:51:47,360 --> 00:51:49,680
Speaker 9: and we all loved him. For context of what's to come,

1095
00:51:49,760 --> 00:51:52,279
Speaker 9: my mom was pretty well off, whereas Jim came into

1096
00:51:52,320 --> 00:51:54,760
Speaker 9: the marriage with basically nothing. A week after I posted

1097
00:51:54,840 --> 00:51:57,919
Speaker 9: Jim's obituary, I got that frantic call from my younger brother,

1098
00:51:58,239 --> 00:52:01,160
Speaker 9: who had been taking good care of My brother was

1099
00:52:01,239 --> 00:52:04,239
Speaker 9: low to midfunctioning autistic, but he really stepped up to

1100
00:52:04,239 --> 00:52:06,239
Speaker 9: the plate when my mom needed him. I asked who

1101
00:52:06,320 --> 00:52:08,680
Speaker 9: was taking stuff out of my mom's house, but only

1102
00:52:08,800 --> 00:52:11,240
Speaker 9: got an incoherent screaming reply.

1103
00:52:11,480 --> 00:52:12,640
Speaker 4: So I left work.

1104
00:52:12,719 --> 00:52:14,840
Speaker 9: And headed over there, but first I called my older

1105
00:52:14,880 --> 00:52:16,719
Speaker 9: brother on the off chance that was going to be

1106
00:52:16,760 --> 00:52:18,919
Speaker 9: an altercation. I have to admit I'm pretty clean cut

1107
00:52:18,960 --> 00:52:21,799
Speaker 9: and wouldn't intimidate anyone unless they mistook me for an

1108
00:52:21,840 --> 00:52:25,399
Speaker 9: IRS auditor. My older brother, however, rides a Harley, and

1109
00:52:25,440 --> 00:52:27,759
Speaker 9: you'd be hard pressed to guess if he was a

1110
00:52:27,800 --> 00:52:31,839
Speaker 9: member of zz Top or Hell's Angels or both. Heck, yeah,

1111
00:52:31,880 --> 00:52:33,880
Speaker 9: you wouldn't want to meet him in a dark alley.

1112
00:52:33,920 --> 00:52:34,560
Speaker 4: He's scary.

1113
00:52:35,040 --> 00:52:37,880
Speaker 9: At my mom's house, I found Jim's adult son from

1114
00:52:37,920 --> 00:52:40,520
Speaker 9: a previous marriage, who none of us even knew existed,

1115
00:52:40,880 --> 00:52:43,839
Speaker 9: loading things into a flatbed trailer hitched to a big

1116
00:52:43,880 --> 00:52:46,480
Speaker 9: pickup truck with the help of his own son, about

1117
00:52:46,520 --> 00:52:47,239
Speaker 9: twelve years old.

1118
00:52:47,400 --> 00:52:50,040
Speaker 4: I demanded to know just what the f did they

1119
00:52:50,120 --> 00:52:50,879
Speaker 4: think they were doing?

1120
00:52:50,920 --> 00:52:54,400
Speaker 9: When his big ever wife came out of the house,

1121
00:52:55,000 --> 00:52:57,839
Speaker 9: hiked up her sweatpants, and heaved her way over to us.

1122
00:52:57,920 --> 00:53:00,799
Speaker 9: Long story short, too late, I know they'd rented this

1123
00:53:00,880 --> 00:53:04,200
Speaker 9: trailer and driven all the way from Rochester, New York

1124
00:53:04,239 --> 00:53:07,680
Speaker 9: to Denver, Colorado, and by god, they were going to

1125
00:53:07,719 --> 00:53:10,680
Speaker 9: get what was rightfully theirs. Before I could get any further,

1126
00:53:10,800 --> 00:53:12,799
Speaker 9: both my brother and the police showed up.

1127
00:53:13,000 --> 00:53:14,320
Speaker 4: Good thing. My brother didn't.

1128
00:53:14,080 --> 00:53:17,320
Speaker 9: Arrive before the cops because he looked ready to unlive someone.

1129
00:53:17,800 --> 00:53:20,279
Speaker 9: Mom had sensibly called the police because she had no

1130
00:53:20,320 --> 00:53:22,719
Speaker 9: idea what was going on. Apparently my younger brother had

1131
00:53:22,840 --> 00:53:25,520
Speaker 9: let these folks in when they identified themselves and said

1132
00:53:25,520 --> 00:53:28,960
Speaker 9: their condolences to Mom, and then the wife proceeded to

1133
00:53:29,000 --> 00:53:31,600
Speaker 9: point out things throughout the house that she wanted, and

1134
00:53:31,640 --> 00:53:34,240
Speaker 9: her husband started loading them up. She had this weird

1135
00:53:34,280 --> 00:53:36,760
Speaker 9: notion that everything in a marriage is split fifty to fifty,

1136
00:53:36,800 --> 00:53:39,919
Speaker 9: even after passing, and they were just coming to take

1137
00:53:40,000 --> 00:53:43,040
Speaker 9: Jim's half. I'm not a lawyer, but I'm pretty sure

1138
00:53:43,040 --> 00:53:45,360
Speaker 9: that it doesn't work that way. I got most of

1139
00:53:45,400 --> 00:53:47,800
Speaker 9: that from their explanations to the police, who didn't stop

1140
00:53:47,880 --> 00:53:50,480
Speaker 9: me or my brother from taking everything back out of

1141
00:53:50,480 --> 00:53:53,640
Speaker 9: the trailer in the truck bed. The officers forced politeness,

1142
00:53:53,680 --> 00:53:56,279
Speaker 9: but were obviously struggling not to roll their eyes and

1143
00:53:56,320 --> 00:53:59,040
Speaker 9: tell these people to get lost. Will be back, shouted

1144
00:53:59,040 --> 00:54:01,320
Speaker 9: the wife as they left empty handed.

1145
00:54:01,520 --> 00:54:02,600
Speaker 4: Who are these people?

1146
00:54:02,800 --> 00:54:05,640
Speaker 5: I don't know the cartoons they sound These are the

1147
00:54:05,680 --> 00:54:06,640
Speaker 5: sack fill back and.

1148
00:54:06,600 --> 00:54:08,919
Speaker 4: Says, sure enough, they showed up the next day.

1149
00:54:09,320 --> 00:54:12,560
Speaker 9: Well, Mom gave them my phone number, said I was

1150
00:54:12,600 --> 00:54:15,000
Speaker 9: handling everything and the cops were getting called if they

1151
00:54:15,000 --> 00:54:17,319
Speaker 9: tried to step one foot inside her home. Mom told

1152
00:54:17,360 --> 00:54:19,680
Speaker 9: me that Jim had a small rented storage space and

1153
00:54:19,719 --> 00:54:20,640
Speaker 9: they were welcome to.

1154
00:54:20,600 --> 00:54:21,400
Speaker 4: Take everything in it.

1155
00:54:21,440 --> 00:54:23,279
Speaker 9: So I gave them the address and met them there.

1156
00:54:23,320 --> 00:54:25,600
Speaker 9: The wife was pretty pissed that there was nothing of

1157
00:54:25,680 --> 00:54:28,759
Speaker 9: value in this five y five rented closet. Sorting through

1158
00:54:28,840 --> 00:54:32,680
Speaker 9: Jim's stuff, she tossed the medals from Vietnam into the trash.

1159
00:54:32,800 --> 00:54:35,920
Speaker 9: The husband took some photo albums, but not much else.

1160
00:54:36,040 --> 00:54:38,440
Speaker 9: While she's screaming what a waste of time this was,

1161
00:54:38,520 --> 00:54:40,880
Speaker 9: their twelve year old son is outside looking.

1162
00:54:40,680 --> 00:54:42,799
Speaker 4: Oh wait, No, I don't know who these people are,

1163
00:54:42,840 --> 00:54:43,600
Speaker 4: maybe the brother.

1164
00:54:43,760 --> 00:54:45,120
Speaker 5: I think they just have a kid.

1165
00:54:45,160 --> 00:54:46,399
Speaker 4: They have a kid, I know, but I think that's

1166
00:54:46,400 --> 00:54:48,919
Speaker 4: what I read earlier to think that this was the sun.

1167
00:54:49,040 --> 00:54:49,680
Speaker 5: I think you're right.

1168
00:54:49,800 --> 00:54:51,280
Speaker 4: I spotted a very.

1169
00:54:51,120 --> 00:54:54,120
Speaker 9: Old linel train set in the original box on the shelf,

1170
00:54:54,200 --> 00:54:56,480
Speaker 9: handed it to him and said, I'm sure your grandfather

1171
00:54:56,600 --> 00:54:57,680
Speaker 9: would have wanted.

1172
00:54:57,360 --> 00:54:57,880
Speaker 4: You to have this.

1173
00:54:58,080 --> 00:55:00,360
Speaker 9: It was probably the only thing of real val in

1174
00:55:00,400 --> 00:55:03,360
Speaker 9: there they took off, mostly empty handed, shouting that I

1175
00:55:03,400 --> 00:55:06,600
Speaker 9: hadn't heard the last of this. I retrieved the military

1176
00:55:06,600 --> 00:55:09,520
Speaker 9: medals from the trash. Mom had them framed and that

1177
00:55:09,680 --> 00:55:09,880
Speaker 9: was that.

1178
00:55:10,719 --> 00:55:14,279
Speaker 4: Or so I thought, No, not more problems.

1179
00:55:14,400 --> 00:55:16,560
Speaker 5: Oh you know, you can't catch break can't.

1180
00:55:17,080 --> 00:55:20,160
Speaker 9: A month later, Mom got some legalish document from a

1181
00:55:20,239 --> 00:55:23,520
Speaker 9: lawyer in Rochester demanding full disclosure of assets. I took

1182
00:55:23,560 --> 00:55:25,400
Speaker 9: it to a lawyer and he about fell out of

1183
00:55:25,400 --> 00:55:28,600
Speaker 9: his chair laughing. It wasn't even a court document, no

1184
00:55:28,760 --> 00:55:32,760
Speaker 9: lawsuit or anything, just an officious letter trying to scare

1185
00:55:32,880 --> 00:55:34,839
Speaker 9: Mom into some vague compliance.

1186
00:55:35,000 --> 00:55:37,960
Speaker 5: It's like a letter written with them. It's got the

1187
00:55:38,080 --> 00:55:40,600
Speaker 5: magazine cut out. Yeah, it says, tell.

1188
00:55:40,480 --> 00:55:41,279
Speaker 7: Us what you have?

1189
00:55:41,760 --> 00:55:44,480
Speaker 5: Yeah, I want it, give me, give me everything you own,

1190
00:55:44,560 --> 00:55:46,000
Speaker 5: give me it or else.

1191
00:55:47,040 --> 00:55:50,759
Speaker 9: The lawyer advised not replying, just ignore it, which is

1192
00:55:50,800 --> 00:55:53,319
Speaker 9: exactly what we did. We never heard another peep from

1193
00:55:53,320 --> 00:55:55,960
Speaker 9: those idiots. But man, you got a question how anyone

1194
00:55:56,000 --> 00:55:58,600
Speaker 9: can have such an inflated sense of entitlement that they

1195
00:55:58,640 --> 00:56:01,400
Speaker 9: think fifty percent of everything and there passed away father's

1196
00:56:01,440 --> 00:56:03,560
Speaker 9: wife's house is rightfully theirs.

1197
00:56:03,680 --> 00:56:04,840
Speaker 4: Yeah, okay, so that's.

1198
00:56:04,640 --> 00:56:06,520
Speaker 9: What it was saying earlier because the fifty to fifty

1199
00:56:06,560 --> 00:56:07,759
Speaker 9: line like confused me.

1200
00:56:07,880 --> 00:56:10,560
Speaker 5: But yeah, they were saying like they're entitled to fifty

1201
00:56:10,640 --> 00:56:13,799
Speaker 5: percent of the house, which is like, it's not how

1202
00:56:14,320 --> 00:56:15,520
Speaker 5: how will's work?

1203
00:56:15,719 --> 00:56:18,280
Speaker 9: Not at all, not at all, especially since the wife

1204
00:56:18,320 --> 00:56:21,480
Speaker 9: is alive, super super nasty how that works?

1205
00:56:21,680 --> 00:56:22,600
Speaker 4: That's so crazy.

1206
00:56:22,840 --> 00:56:25,560
Speaker 9: Edit's I want to reply to everyone, but that feels

1207
00:56:25,560 --> 00:56:26,400
Speaker 9: like trying.

1208
00:56:26,160 --> 00:56:27,920
Speaker 4: To inflate comments or something.

1209
00:56:28,040 --> 00:56:29,680
Speaker 9: But I have to say, all of your stories of

1210
00:56:29,760 --> 00:56:33,000
Speaker 9: going through similar incidences after losing a loved one are.

1211
00:56:32,880 --> 00:56:34,680
Speaker 4: Making me feel absolutely horrified.

1212
00:56:34,880 --> 00:56:36,680
Speaker 9: I know it happens, but it sounds like it's a

1213
00:56:36,719 --> 00:56:39,000
Speaker 9: lot more common than I ever dreamed. We didn't really

1214
00:56:39,040 --> 00:56:42,040
Speaker 9: lose anything in the end, except sadly Jim, but most

1215
00:56:42,040 --> 00:56:44,840
Speaker 9: of you did very very sickened to hear that. So

1216
00:56:44,960 --> 00:56:48,120
Speaker 9: to clarify about none of us even knowing about the son,

1217
00:56:48,239 --> 00:56:50,160
Speaker 9: I should state that my brothers and I didn't know

1218
00:56:50,160 --> 00:56:52,279
Speaker 9: about him. My mother did, but she figured that that

1219
00:56:52,440 --> 00:56:54,480
Speaker 9: was not her story to tell, so she never told us.

1220
00:56:54,600 --> 00:56:58,000
Speaker 9: Jim's son went full note contact years earlier and wouldn't

1221
00:56:58,000 --> 00:57:01,200
Speaker 9: even let Jim meet his grandson. I suspect that maybe

1222
00:57:01,280 --> 00:57:04,560
Speaker 9: Jim was marine sergeant strict and maybe that son didn't

1223
00:57:04,600 --> 00:57:05,719
Speaker 9: have the happiest childhood.

1224
00:57:05,760 --> 00:57:07,160
Speaker 4: That was not the Jim that we knew.

1225
00:57:07,160 --> 00:57:09,520
Speaker 9: However, he was the last person you'd ever want to

1226
00:57:09,520 --> 00:57:12,160
Speaker 9: go know contact with. Mom had the son's contact info

1227
00:57:12,280 --> 00:57:14,920
Speaker 9: and wrote to him when Jim was diagnosed with cancer

1228
00:57:15,200 --> 00:57:18,360
Speaker 9: and his prognosis wasn't good. He never bothered to reply

1229
00:57:18,400 --> 00:57:20,240
Speaker 9: to her or get in touch with his father. She

1230
00:57:20,320 --> 00:57:22,800
Speaker 9: wrote to him again after Jim's passing, which is how

1231
00:57:22,800 --> 00:57:25,200
Speaker 9: they knew to show up. Jim's only asset was an

1232
00:57:25,280 --> 00:57:28,320
Speaker 9: insurance policy and the designated beneficiary was a.

1233
00:57:28,280 --> 00:57:30,919
Speaker 4: Trust for my older brother's young son and daughter.

1234
00:57:31,080 --> 00:57:34,720
Speaker 9: Even though Jim wasn't their biological grandfather, he was the

1235
00:57:34,760 --> 00:57:38,560
Speaker 9: only grandpa they ever knew. It's enough to help each

1236
00:57:38,640 --> 00:57:41,840
Speaker 9: with education or down payment on a home someday. They

1237
00:57:42,000 --> 00:57:44,640
Speaker 9: adored him, and my nephew dreams of joining the Marines

1238
00:57:44,680 --> 00:57:46,680
Speaker 9: one day to be just like Grandpa. There are some

1239
00:57:46,720 --> 00:57:49,240
Speaker 9: comments coming. Number one says, that was a nice gesture

1240
00:57:49,240 --> 00:57:51,560
Speaker 9: on your part to give the boy the Lionel train set.

1241
00:57:51,680 --> 00:57:54,520
Speaker 9: I hope the wife and her husband let him keep

1242
00:57:54,520 --> 00:57:56,840
Speaker 9: it and don't put it up on eBay. Ope says,

1243
00:57:56,920 --> 00:57:59,320
Speaker 9: that was my exact thought. That they just try to

1244
00:57:59,320 --> 00:58:02,240
Speaker 9: sell it. He looked about ready to cry. He seemed

1245
00:58:02,280 --> 00:58:04,960
Speaker 9: like a sweet, quiet kid. I felt really sorry for him.

1246
00:58:05,000 --> 00:58:08,440
Speaker 9: Commentur number two says, passing and greed go hand in hand.

1247
00:58:08,560 --> 00:58:11,160
Speaker 9: My grandfather was at the funeral home for exactly twenty

1248
00:58:11,160 --> 00:58:14,200
Speaker 9: five minutes before my grandma's phone rang with multiple calls.

1249
00:58:14,280 --> 00:58:16,560
Speaker 9: My cousin was calling in a panic, letting her know

1250
00:58:16,680 --> 00:58:18,840
Speaker 9: that my aunts and uncles were raiding the house for

1251
00:58:18,920 --> 00:58:22,480
Speaker 9: his silver and gold coins and his pupews. Wait, I'm

1252
00:58:22,560 --> 00:58:25,920
Speaker 9: sorry that this is another this is a commentary story.

1253
00:58:26,160 --> 00:58:29,080
Speaker 5: Oh, I was like the raiding the house for silver

1254
00:58:29,200 --> 00:58:29,720
Speaker 5: and gold.

1255
00:58:30,440 --> 00:58:31,400
Speaker 4: I know different.

1256
00:58:31,440 --> 00:58:33,320
Speaker 5: Sorry, but yeah, but that just happened to something. I

1257
00:58:33,360 --> 00:58:35,080
Speaker 5: was so crazy that that happened to someone.

1258
00:58:35,200 --> 00:58:38,960
Speaker 9: Someone else responds, and my stepfather expectantly passed away. We

1259
00:58:38,960 --> 00:58:40,959
Speaker 9: were living in the house that he had previously shared

1260
00:58:41,000 --> 00:58:43,120
Speaker 9: with his parents. They had been passed away for years

1261
00:58:43,160 --> 00:58:45,400
Speaker 9: at this point. The day after he passed away, two

1262
00:58:45,440 --> 00:58:47,120
Speaker 9: of his three siblings showed up to the house and

1263
00:58:47,120 --> 00:58:50,760
Speaker 9: started taking out everything they claimed belonging to their parents, furniture,

1264
00:58:51,080 --> 00:58:53,400
Speaker 9: nick knacks, blankets, whenever they could fit in their cars

1265
00:58:53,400 --> 00:58:53,720
Speaker 9: and truck.

1266
00:58:53,800 --> 00:58:55,360
Speaker 4: My mom was so distraught with grief.

1267
00:58:55,440 --> 00:58:57,760
Speaker 9: She just let them take the stuff, and his younger

1268
00:58:57,800 --> 00:59:00,520
Speaker 9: brother showed up and was appalled by them. They all

1269
00:59:00,640 --> 00:59:03,000
Speaker 9: ended up arguing and he made them bring the stuff

1270
00:59:03,040 --> 00:59:05,080
Speaker 9: back in the house. Funny thing though, the younger brother

1271
00:59:05,160 --> 00:59:06,840
Speaker 9: waited a couple months and then talk to my mom

1272
00:59:06,880 --> 00:59:11,200
Speaker 9: into giving him all my stepdad's hunting rifles, glector's pupews,

1273
00:59:11,400 --> 00:59:14,440
Speaker 9: bows and arrows, et cetera, which she immediately sold.

1274
00:59:14,560 --> 00:59:17,680
Speaker 4: So yeah, so much for the good guy persona. That

1275
00:59:17,920 --> 00:59:19,320
Speaker 4: is the end of that story.

1276
00:59:19,440 --> 00:59:22,080
Speaker 5: Make sure you got like a will drafted up or something.

1277
00:59:22,320 --> 00:59:25,600
Speaker 9: Yeah, I feel like that would definitely come in handy here.

1278
00:59:26,480 --> 00:59:28,960
Speaker 9: I doubt they got everything if they were so estranged

1279
00:59:29,080 --> 00:59:31,680
Speaker 9: like that. But that's so disappointing that, like, you know, obviously,

1280
00:59:31,720 --> 00:59:33,959
Speaker 9: you know, we don't know their relationship like to Jim

1281
00:59:34,000 --> 00:59:37,120
Speaker 9: and his son, but that's so upsetting that they didn't

1282
00:59:37,120 --> 00:59:40,960
Speaker 9: even care after they heard that he was like diagnosed

1283
00:59:41,040 --> 00:59:43,840
Speaker 9: or passing away, and then they only saw it as

1284
00:59:43,880 --> 00:59:46,440
Speaker 9: like a chance to take things very weird energy.

1285
00:59:46,560 --> 00:59:49,560
Speaker 5: Very very weird, cool, stinky stinky, stinky.

1286
00:59:49,280 --> 00:59:52,480
Speaker 10: Stinky stinky, I guess smell you from here, Like, yeah,

1287
00:59:52,800 --> 00:59:55,960
Speaker 10: my aunt demanded I pay for her son's college fees

1288
00:59:56,120 --> 00:59:57,720
Speaker 10: after rejecting my needs.

1289
00:59:57,800 --> 00:59:59,200
Speaker 4: He's your son, not mine.

1290
00:59:59,400 --> 01:00:01,800
Speaker 5: I got a job job around three months ago. It's

1291
01:00:01,880 --> 01:00:04,400
Speaker 5: my first proper job that doesn't happen to be in

1292
01:00:04,440 --> 01:00:06,000
Speaker 5: a fast food restaurant. No.

1293
01:00:06,120 --> 01:00:06,280
Speaker 7: Eight.

1294
01:00:06,360 --> 01:00:08,000
Speaker 5: This was to pay for my rent and save up

1295
01:00:08,000 --> 01:00:10,040
Speaker 5: for UNI. I live away from my parents because I

1296
01:00:10,040 --> 01:00:12,680
Speaker 5: go to an international school in another city as per

1297
01:00:12,680 --> 01:00:15,360
Speaker 5: customs in the country I live in, and to show gratitude,

1298
01:00:15,400 --> 01:00:18,120
Speaker 5: I gifted my first paycheck to my parents, whoa By

1299
01:00:18,160 --> 01:00:20,480
Speaker 5: the way, this comes from Oka training eight one nine

1300
01:00:20,560 --> 01:00:22,120
Speaker 5: eight and if you want to smit your own stories,

1301
01:00:22,120 --> 01:00:24,360
Speaker 5: go to the r slash Okay storytime suburt it. I'm

1302
01:00:24,400 --> 01:00:27,960
Speaker 5: Sophia and I'm Angie, and Op says it wasn't much,

1303
01:00:28,160 --> 01:00:30,200
Speaker 5: but I could see that they appreciated it and we're

1304
01:00:30,240 --> 01:00:33,800
Speaker 5: all happy. This lasted for ten minutes. My mother then

1305
01:00:33,840 --> 01:00:36,000
Speaker 5: decided to go on the family group chat to tell

1306
01:00:36,080 --> 01:00:38,760
Speaker 5: everyone no blame on her, I understand. I then got

1307
01:00:38,760 --> 01:00:40,880
Speaker 5: a call from my aunt, who proceeded to ask me

1308
01:00:40,920 --> 01:00:44,040
Speaker 5: about the details of my job, which seemed fishy considering

1309
01:00:44,080 --> 01:00:46,720
Speaker 5: she hasn't really given a crap about my existence until

1310
01:00:46,760 --> 01:00:49,680
Speaker 5: two seconds after that text message was sent. She then

1311
01:00:49,720 --> 01:00:52,080
Speaker 5: explained that her son, my cousin, who goes to the

1312
01:00:52,080 --> 01:00:54,280
Speaker 5: same school and is in my grade, is going to

1313
01:00:54,360 --> 01:00:57,360
Speaker 5: college no crap, and that I, as a person with

1314
01:00:57,400 --> 01:01:00,000
Speaker 5: a source of income and as a family member, should

1315
01:01:00,080 --> 01:01:02,840
Speaker 5: pay part of his school fees using my next paycheck.

1316
01:01:02,960 --> 01:01:04,800
Speaker 5: She said that as part of the family, I should

1317
01:01:04,800 --> 01:01:07,200
Speaker 5: support him. For the record, I know that my aunt

1318
01:01:07,240 --> 01:01:10,080
Speaker 5: has a substantially larger salary than I do because she's

1319
01:01:10,120 --> 01:01:13,160
Speaker 5: an adult little adult money, but it seems she doesn't

1320
01:01:13,160 --> 01:01:14,920
Speaker 5: want to spend any of it on things that don't

1321
01:01:14,920 --> 01:01:17,480
Speaker 5: benefit her. Additionally, when I got into this school, my

1322
01:01:17,560 --> 01:01:19,480
Speaker 5: mother called my aunt to ask if I could stay

1323
01:01:19,480 --> 01:01:22,320
Speaker 5: with her until I graduated, but she refused, saying they

1324
01:01:22,320 --> 01:01:25,000
Speaker 5: didn't have the space. Instead, my parents bought me a

1325
01:01:25,000 --> 01:01:27,560
Speaker 5: small flat and I have to work to contribute to

1326
01:01:27,640 --> 01:01:29,960
Speaker 5: the rent. My aunt went on about how hard my

1327
01:01:30,040 --> 01:01:32,440
Speaker 5: cousin worked to get into college and insisted that I

1328
01:01:32,480 --> 01:01:35,200
Speaker 5: should have some sympathy for him. Honestly, I don't feel

1329
01:01:35,240 --> 01:01:37,600
Speaker 5: any sympathy for a kid who stays out all night

1330
01:01:37,640 --> 01:01:39,680
Speaker 5: and barely puts in the effort at school. With the

1331
01:01:39,720 --> 01:01:42,880
Speaker 5: little patients I had left, I politely reminded her that

1332
01:01:42,960 --> 01:01:45,280
Speaker 5: most of my salary goes to my own basic needs

1333
01:01:45,640 --> 01:01:49,160
Speaker 5: such as paying rent and buying food, as well as

1334
01:01:49,200 --> 01:01:52,600
Speaker 5: saving up for my tuition fees. She rudely responded with,

1335
01:01:53,040 --> 01:01:54,680
Speaker 5: if you can do that, you should be able to

1336
01:01:54,680 --> 01:01:59,120
Speaker 5: donate some money if I can again pay for surviving,

1337
01:02:00,000 --> 01:02:01,560
Speaker 5: literally surviving.

1338
01:02:01,760 --> 01:02:02,360
Speaker 4: Gosh.

1339
01:02:02,400 --> 01:02:04,440
Speaker 5: I've always been taught the value of hard work and

1340
01:02:04,480 --> 01:02:06,880
Speaker 5: self sufficiency, and now it felt like my effort was

1341
01:02:06,920 --> 01:02:09,160
Speaker 5: being taken for granted. I then hung up on her

1342
01:02:09,240 --> 01:02:11,240
Speaker 5: out of frustration. Later, I got a call from my

1343
01:02:11,280 --> 01:02:14,040
Speaker 5: mother asking why her sister was complaining about me. I

1344
01:02:14,120 --> 01:02:16,360
Speaker 5: explained my end of the story, and now she has

1345
01:02:16,400 --> 01:02:18,640
Speaker 5: blocked my aunt as well. My aunt realized this and

1346
01:02:18,680 --> 01:02:21,280
Speaker 5: has been pestering other relatives to help cover the fees,

1347
01:02:21,360 --> 01:02:24,320
Speaker 5: guilt tripping and shaming those who don't donate, and is

1348
01:02:24,320 --> 01:02:27,080
Speaker 5: probably ranting in the family chat as I'm writing this.

1349
01:02:27,560 --> 01:02:28,280
Speaker 7: Comments.

1350
01:02:28,440 --> 01:02:30,200
Speaker 5: Comment one says, I think I would have laughed if

1351
01:02:30,240 --> 01:02:32,680
Speaker 5: any relative said I need to pay for their child

1352
01:02:32,680 --> 01:02:34,680
Speaker 5: to go to school. Because I have a job and

1353
01:02:34,720 --> 01:02:37,080
Speaker 5: the other adult child does not, I guess he needs

1354
01:02:37,120 --> 01:02:39,320
Speaker 5: to get a job. Comment two says, your mother should

1355
01:02:39,480 --> 01:02:42,000
Speaker 5: suggest that, just like you, he can fine a job.

1356
01:02:42,160 --> 01:02:44,680
Speaker 5: And support himself. Op He says he lives under my

1357
01:02:44,720 --> 01:02:47,000
Speaker 5: aunt's roof, so I doubt he pays for rent, let

1358
01:02:47,000 --> 01:02:49,720
Speaker 5: alone food. And there is an update. This is starting

1359
01:02:49,760 --> 01:02:51,560
Speaker 5: to feel like a fever dream, as some of the

1360
01:02:51,560 --> 01:02:54,480
Speaker 5: comments suggested. I did go no contact with my aunt.

1361
01:02:54,600 --> 01:02:56,760
Speaker 5: I didn't talk to her, but I got some hateful

1362
01:02:56,760 --> 01:02:59,440
Speaker 5: messages on social media from people I assume to be

1363
01:02:59,520 --> 01:03:02,640
Speaker 5: my aunt's friend. I hope they're all donating to her right.

1364
01:03:03,200 --> 01:03:05,880
Speaker 5: This worked for a day until I realized the horrible

1365
01:03:05,960 --> 01:03:09,280
Speaker 5: timing of my last post. Our family has these gatherings

1366
01:03:09,320 --> 01:03:12,120
Speaker 5: for dinner around once every four so months, where all

1367
01:03:12,120 --> 01:03:15,720
Speaker 5: our extended family that is descended from my maternal grandmother gathers,

1368
01:03:15,880 --> 01:03:18,280
Speaker 5: usually at a relative's house. This time it was my

1369
01:03:18,400 --> 01:03:20,800
Speaker 5: parents turn to host, and it felt good to go

1370
01:03:20,920 --> 01:03:23,920
Speaker 5: back because, in my opinion, living alone isn't fun. I

1371
01:03:23,960 --> 01:03:26,800
Speaker 5: got there at around three pm today. I'm going back

1372
01:03:26,800 --> 01:03:29,400
Speaker 5: to school tomorrow in order to help prepare and best

1373
01:03:29,480 --> 01:03:31,640
Speaker 5: of all, beat the rest of my relatives to have

1374
01:03:31,720 --> 01:03:34,360
Speaker 5: some quality time with my parents and sister. As soon

1375
01:03:34,400 --> 01:03:36,720
Speaker 5: as I got there, they showed me my aunt ranting

1376
01:03:36,760 --> 01:03:38,920
Speaker 5: out of self pity in the family group chat, and

1377
01:03:38,960 --> 01:03:41,520
Speaker 5: we laughed a bit. At around five, my relatives started

1378
01:03:41,560 --> 01:03:44,680
Speaker 5: showing up, including my aunt and her family. I managed

1379
01:03:44,680 --> 01:03:47,200
Speaker 5: to avoid her for the first hour until dinner, as

1380
01:03:47,240 --> 01:03:49,840
Speaker 5: that is when we all sat at a long table

1381
01:03:49,880 --> 01:03:52,400
Speaker 5: and have this time where we go over what everyone

1382
01:03:52,400 --> 01:03:54,360
Speaker 5: has been up to for the past few months. One

1383
01:03:54,400 --> 01:03:57,000
Speaker 5: of my uncles then asked all the kids how school was,

1384
01:03:57,080 --> 01:04:00,000
Speaker 5: and eventually asked about me and my cousin's internal room

1385
01:04:00,440 --> 01:04:02,840
Speaker 5: for contacts. The school I go to follows the ib

1386
01:04:03,000 --> 01:04:05,000
Speaker 5: exam board, and those of you who were in an

1387
01:04:05,040 --> 01:04:08,280
Speaker 5: IVY school probably know it's heck. My cousin went first

1388
01:04:08,320 --> 01:04:11,000
Speaker 5: and told everyone rather smugly that he got a total

1389
01:04:11,080 --> 01:04:14,040
Speaker 5: of twenty six out of forty five a pass and

1390
01:04:14,280 --> 01:04:16,080
Speaker 5: was told by someone to study harder.

1391
01:04:16,520 --> 01:04:16,840
Speaker 4: Lol.

1392
01:04:16,920 --> 01:04:19,200
Speaker 5: It was then my turn and I told everyone I

1393
01:04:19,240 --> 01:04:21,400
Speaker 5: got a forty two, which got me a round of

1394
01:04:21,400 --> 01:04:23,560
Speaker 5: applause and a pissed off look for my cousin, and

1395
01:04:23,720 --> 01:04:25,880
Speaker 5: my aunt decided to stand up and claim that this

1396
01:04:26,040 --> 01:04:28,320
Speaker 5: was the reason I should help my cousin, as I'm

1397
01:04:28,360 --> 01:04:32,120
Speaker 5: apparently doing well enough, and that my lazy cousin deserves

1398
01:04:32,160 --> 01:04:35,720
Speaker 5: the same opportunity to because he was trying hard and

1399
01:04:35,800 --> 01:04:38,800
Speaker 5: cut down on playing Call of Duty and is studying.

1400
01:04:38,960 --> 01:04:42,720
Speaker 9: This is crazy, except original logic was you should donate

1401
01:04:43,000 --> 01:04:45,200
Speaker 9: to this guy because he worked so hard to get

1402
01:04:45,240 --> 01:04:48,440
Speaker 9: into college. Yeah, and because you worked so hard to

1403
01:04:48,480 --> 01:04:50,080
Speaker 9: get a better grade than he did.

1404
01:04:50,320 --> 01:04:52,080
Speaker 4: Then, like, that doesn't mean anything.

1405
01:04:52,200 --> 01:04:54,240
Speaker 9: And his working hard is cutting down and playing Call

1406
01:04:54,280 --> 01:04:54,680
Speaker 9: of Duty.

1407
01:04:54,880 --> 01:04:55,320
Speaker 4: That's it.

1408
01:04:55,440 --> 01:04:58,040
Speaker 5: He just plays it like one less minute. That's every

1409
01:04:58,120 --> 01:05:02,400
Speaker 5: rady he's like yesterday I stopped playing at eleven instead

1410
01:05:02,440 --> 01:05:03,800
Speaker 5: of eleven thirty.

1411
01:05:04,120 --> 01:05:07,680
Speaker 9: Right, It's like I see all the sacrifices he's making

1412
01:05:07,720 --> 01:05:08,440
Speaker 9: for his education.

1413
01:05:08,680 --> 01:05:11,400
Speaker 5: In my opinion, if you take IBDP and still have

1414
01:05:11,440 --> 01:05:14,160
Speaker 5: time for COD, you must be really smart. She then

1415
01:05:14,240 --> 01:05:16,800
Speaker 5: switched to a customer service voice and started appealing to

1416
01:05:16,840 --> 01:05:19,840
Speaker 5: her other relatives, as well as subtly shading those present

1417
01:05:19,960 --> 01:05:22,680
Speaker 5: that didn't. As some of you suggested, I went and

1418
01:05:22,720 --> 01:05:25,320
Speaker 5: told her that I will donate, but only the same

1419
01:05:25,360 --> 01:05:29,280
Speaker 5: amount of money she paid for my school fees boom

1420
01:05:29,400 --> 01:05:33,360
Speaker 5: aka nothing, and that if my cousin really needed money,

1421
01:05:33,440 --> 01:05:36,240
Speaker 5: I would be glad to share my employer's information with him.

1422
01:05:36,280 --> 01:05:38,640
Speaker 5: I had a lot of fun saying that, but unfortunately

1423
01:05:38,760 --> 01:05:42,200
Speaker 5: got the opposite of the desired effect. My aunt went ballistic,

1424
01:05:42,280 --> 01:05:44,920
Speaker 5: and started blaming my mother for raising a heartless and

1425
01:05:45,040 --> 01:05:47,720
Speaker 5: stupid child. Well you know that she's not stupid.

1426
01:05:47,960 --> 01:05:50,880
Speaker 4: Yeah, she got that much smarter than your son.

1427
01:05:51,120 --> 01:05:52,800
Speaker 5: And that I was now of the age to be

1428
01:05:52,800 --> 01:05:56,320
Speaker 5: a breadwinner for the family, which she emphasized included her.

1429
01:05:56,560 --> 01:05:58,000
Speaker 4: What the heck is going on?

1430
01:05:58,320 --> 01:06:02,040
Speaker 5: Why is op that like picking what maybe twenty year old,

1431
01:06:02,120 --> 01:06:05,560
Speaker 5: maybe eighteen, I don't know which. She's young teenager basically

1432
01:06:05,760 --> 01:06:08,680
Speaker 5: have to be the breadwinner for her aunt, like.

1433
01:06:09,000 --> 01:06:11,520
Speaker 9: You, being the breadwinner for your family usually means like

1434
01:06:11,600 --> 01:06:13,440
Speaker 9: for your partner and your children.

1435
01:06:13,160 --> 01:06:17,040
Speaker 10: Not for your whole entire, for your parents, yeah, but

1436
01:06:17,480 --> 01:06:21,600
Speaker 10: not for your aunt like usually not the other culture.

1437
01:06:21,840 --> 01:06:24,160
Speaker 5: This pissed my father off, and he hauled my aunt

1438
01:06:24,200 --> 01:06:27,360
Speaker 5: into another room, but we could still hear his cursing

1439
01:06:27,440 --> 01:06:29,480
Speaker 5: and that she shouldn't be dependent on other people. In

1440
01:06:29,520 --> 01:06:31,720
Speaker 5: the end, my aunt walked out with my cousin, but

1441
01:06:31,800 --> 01:06:34,320
Speaker 5: not before demanding that my mother talks some sense into

1442
01:06:34,320 --> 01:06:37,520
Speaker 5: me and some other people, but also to then disown us.

1443
01:06:37,600 --> 01:06:39,520
Speaker 5: But there is a little bit left to the story.

1444
01:06:39,760 --> 01:06:43,000
Speaker 5: Ai yai yai, ay ya yai aya yai.

1445
01:06:42,760 --> 01:06:45,480
Speaker 9: Because we knew this, you know, like even before when

1446
01:06:45,480 --> 01:06:48,240
Speaker 9: we were joking about, like, you know, texting her back

1447
01:06:48,280 --> 01:06:50,480
Speaker 9: her own words and stuff. You know, she's not going

1448
01:06:50,520 --> 01:06:53,680
Speaker 9: to understand that at all. She's gonna make so many

1449
01:06:53,720 --> 01:06:56,960
Speaker 9: excuses first and why she's in the right mm hmm.

1450
01:06:57,200 --> 01:07:00,480
Speaker 9: And obviously this is how So at the very least,

1451
01:07:00,880 --> 01:07:02,760
Speaker 9: I'm glad that the rest of the family is not.

1452
01:07:02,960 --> 01:07:04,320
Speaker 5: Yeah, we're also so insane.

1453
01:07:04,600 --> 01:07:07,000
Speaker 4: We have read those kinds of stories and it's so frustrating.

1454
01:07:07,040 --> 01:07:09,720
Speaker 4: So I'm glad glad that your dad is cursing her

1455
01:07:09,760 --> 01:07:11,960
Speaker 4: out in the other room. I would be too, me too.

1456
01:07:12,120 --> 01:07:13,760
Speaker 5: That's my back, lady.

1457
01:07:13,920 --> 01:07:16,760
Speaker 4: And now everyone can see how cuckoo she.

1458
01:07:16,760 --> 01:07:19,880
Speaker 5: Is kluckhoo bananas, and hopefully she figures out how to

1459
01:07:19,880 --> 01:07:21,760
Speaker 5: get her son into college and pay for it. This

1460
01:07:21,880 --> 01:07:24,400
Speaker 5: all happened an hour ago. As I am writing this,

1461
01:07:24,560 --> 01:07:26,520
Speaker 5: my aunt is writing in the group chat that if

1462
01:07:26,560 --> 01:07:29,120
Speaker 5: I am to get a scholarship, it should be added

1463
01:07:29,160 --> 01:07:31,840
Speaker 5: to my cousin. That's not how scholarships work, lady.

1464
01:07:31,960 --> 01:07:34,200
Speaker 4: Not like legally you can't do that, Nope.

1465
01:07:34,080 --> 01:07:36,479
Speaker 5: And I should pay for my tuition myself. I don't

1466
01:07:36,520 --> 01:07:39,680
Speaker 5: think that's how scholarships work. PS No. Eight to my cousin,

1467
01:07:39,760 --> 01:07:41,919
Speaker 5: because to be fair, to him. He didn't demand any

1468
01:07:41,920 --> 01:07:44,160
Speaker 5: of me. I think he's just irked that I got

1469
01:07:44,200 --> 01:07:46,440
Speaker 5: a better score. I don't think he's stupid. I just

1470
01:07:46,440 --> 01:07:48,560
Speaker 5: think that he has devoted all his brain power to cod.

1471
01:07:48,680 --> 01:07:51,240
Speaker 5: Common one says, how did your other relatives react to

1472
01:07:51,280 --> 01:07:53,800
Speaker 5: your aunt's demands? Some of them blocked her, some of

1473
01:07:53,840 --> 01:07:56,600
Speaker 5: them screamed into a phone, and some crazy ones actually

1474
01:07:56,680 --> 01:07:59,240
Speaker 5: keeve money. Common two says, I don't think being disowned

1475
01:07:59,240 --> 01:08:01,320
Speaker 5: by her is the problem. She thinks it is. She

1476
01:08:01,440 --> 01:08:03,880
Speaker 5: was already giving you nothing. Opie says, she wants my

1477
01:08:03,960 --> 01:08:07,720
Speaker 5: family to disown me and whoever else objected to her

1478
01:08:07,800 --> 01:08:11,000
Speaker 5: humble request. Comment three says, how did your cousin react

1479
01:08:11,000 --> 01:08:15,080
Speaker 5: to his mother's embarrassing behavior? OPI says, probably, well, she's

1480
01:08:15,080 --> 01:08:17,000
Speaker 5: bis now. I now have an excuse to hole up

1481
01:08:17,040 --> 01:08:19,000
Speaker 5: in my room and play cod until she calms down.

1482
01:08:19,080 --> 01:08:21,439
Speaker 5: Comment four the fact that you gave your parents your

1483
01:08:21,479 --> 01:08:24,960
Speaker 5: first paycheck is pretty wild, but it's cultural, I guess so.

1484
01:08:25,200 --> 01:08:27,240
Speaker 5: The idea that just because you now have a job,

1485
01:08:27,280 --> 01:08:30,200
Speaker 5: you're expected to support your family and your extended family

1486
01:08:30,360 --> 01:08:33,720
Speaker 5: is insane. The greed here is disgusting. Please don't ever

1487
01:08:33,760 --> 01:08:36,960
Speaker 5: give her or your cousin anything reply. I remember my

1488
01:08:37,040 --> 01:08:39,919
Speaker 5: step monster telling me when I received my first paycheck

1489
01:08:40,200 --> 01:08:42,720
Speaker 5: that some people donate it to charity, and we live

1490
01:08:42,720 --> 01:08:44,920
Speaker 5: in the US are white and middle class. On the

1491
01:08:44,960 --> 01:08:47,200
Speaker 5: other hand, I never heard her tell that to any

1492
01:08:47,200 --> 01:08:49,639
Speaker 5: other kid in the family. I doubt she encouraged her

1493
01:08:49,640 --> 01:08:51,960
Speaker 5: own whelps to do that. And that's the end.

1494
01:08:52,120 --> 01:08:54,800
Speaker 9: That's so insane because there's nothing you can do about no, Like,

1495
01:08:54,840 --> 01:08:57,120
Speaker 9: there's so much logic that we can spit at her

1496
01:08:57,280 --> 01:09:01,840
Speaker 9: and so much that like it's just all of the

1497
01:09:01,920 --> 01:09:04,240
Speaker 9: hypocrisies that we can point out to her, but she

1498
01:09:04,840 --> 01:09:05,920
Speaker 9: does never understand.

1499
01:09:06,040 --> 01:09:08,920
Speaker 5: She wants money and that's it. Yeah, so can't give

1500
01:09:08,920 --> 01:09:10,599
Speaker 5: her that then get out of the kitchen.

1501
01:09:10,760 --> 01:09:12,920
Speaker 4: The point that you just have to be like, you're

1502
01:09:13,000 --> 01:09:13,599
Speaker 4: just crazy?

1503
01:09:13,680 --> 01:09:15,600
Speaker 5: What are you just crazy? And I'm not going to

1504
01:09:15,680 --> 01:09:17,320
Speaker 5: listen to you anymore, Yeah.

1505
01:09:17,160 --> 01:09:19,400
Speaker 9: Because I don't listen to children when they give me

1506
01:09:19,439 --> 01:09:20,719
Speaker 9: advice or ask for money.

1507
01:09:20,760 --> 01:09:23,360
Speaker 4: So I'm gonna listen to you exactly.

1508
01:09:24,040 --> 01:09:25,240
Speaker 3: Hey, John Ogi hoist here.

1509
01:09:25,280 --> 01:09:27,160
Speaker 8: We're gonna get back to this episode, but a quick

1510
01:09:27,200 --> 01:09:29,240
Speaker 8: three minute break of ads from a sponsor's keeping the

1511
01:09:29,240 --> 01:09:29,759
Speaker 8: show alive.

1512
01:09:30,400 --> 01:09:33,960
Speaker 9: My stepdaughter kept stealing from me so I banned her

1513
01:09:34,000 --> 01:09:34,759
Speaker 9: from my home.

1514
01:09:35,040 --> 01:09:36,360
Speaker 5: Get out of my house.

1515
01:09:36,560 --> 01:09:38,960
Speaker 9: She isn't a little kid anymore and is almost done

1516
01:09:39,000 --> 01:09:41,120
Speaker 9: with high school. She's old enough to be tried as

1517
01:09:41,160 --> 01:09:46,160
Speaker 9: an adult. I've helped so okay, I've helped put her

1518
01:09:46,200 --> 01:09:48,840
Speaker 9: through therapy and counseling for years. She has stolen from

1519
01:09:48,840 --> 01:09:51,519
Speaker 9: her own blood relatives, including her own mother. She has

1520
01:09:51,680 --> 01:09:54,640
Speaker 9: no reason to steal. Her father is decently paid, so

1521
01:09:54,800 --> 01:09:56,840
Speaker 9: is her mother. She always gets everything on her wish

1522
01:09:56,840 --> 01:09:59,120
Speaker 9: list and has always had everything handed to her. By

1523
01:09:59,120 --> 01:10:00,960
Speaker 9: the way, this comes from deleted and if you want

1524
01:10:00,960 --> 01:10:03,120
Speaker 9: to submit your own stories, go to the ours lash. Okay,

1525
01:10:03,120 --> 01:10:05,960
Speaker 9: story time is Sepreddit and I'm Angie, I'm Sophia, and

1526
01:10:06,040 --> 01:10:09,439
Speaker 9: Op says, Meanwhile, my kids and I always worked hard

1527
01:10:09,479 --> 01:10:12,000
Speaker 9: for whatever we wanted. We take pride in what few

1528
01:10:12,000 --> 01:10:15,080
Speaker 9: possessions we have passed down from family members and treat

1529
01:10:15,120 --> 01:10:18,080
Speaker 9: gifts with respect because we know how hard someone works

1530
01:10:18,200 --> 01:10:20,840
Speaker 9: to afford them. The first instance of theft from our

1531
01:10:20,880 --> 01:10:23,720
Speaker 9: household happened with my eldest hit a milestone birthday and

1532
01:10:23,840 --> 01:10:26,879
Speaker 9: was gifted a culturally significant item by the eldest matriarch

1533
01:10:26,960 --> 01:10:29,439
Speaker 9: in our family. This is tradition It had characters my

1534
01:10:29,479 --> 01:10:33,240
Speaker 9: eldest liked, and she took painstakingly good care of it.

1535
01:10:33,320 --> 01:10:36,639
Speaker 9: Three months later, said matriarch passed away from old age.

1536
01:10:36,760 --> 01:10:37,280
Speaker 5: Wow.

1537
01:10:37,760 --> 01:10:40,240
Speaker 9: My daughter showed it to her stepsister, who was super

1538
01:10:40,280 --> 01:10:41,439
Speaker 9: careful not to break.

1539
01:10:41,240 --> 01:10:43,840
Speaker 4: It and put it back. The day the girl left.

1540
01:10:43,640 --> 01:10:45,400
Speaker 9: To go back to her mother's house, we were out

1541
01:10:45,400 --> 01:10:48,040
Speaker 9: of doctor's appointment. When we came back, we saw the

1542
01:10:48,080 --> 01:10:50,680
Speaker 9: item was missing from the spot my daughter kept it.

1543
01:10:50,840 --> 01:10:53,120
Speaker 9: She started crying because it was the last gift that

1544
01:10:53,200 --> 01:10:56,320
Speaker 9: her great great grandmother had given her before passing away.

1545
01:10:56,520 --> 01:10:58,719
Speaker 9: I had asked her if she had shown anyone where

1546
01:10:58,760 --> 01:11:01,040
Speaker 9: she kept it, and through the sobs I heard my

1547
01:11:01,120 --> 01:11:04,200
Speaker 9: stepdaughter's name. I immediately called my husband and told him

1548
01:11:04,200 --> 01:11:06,960
Speaker 9: what had happened, asking if his child had grabbed it

1549
01:11:07,000 --> 01:11:10,080
Speaker 9: by mistake. I was trying to be charitable. He knew

1550
01:11:10,080 --> 01:11:12,840
Speaker 9: the significance of the gift and was absolutely furious. The

1551
01:11:12,920 --> 01:11:15,439
Speaker 9: issue with the gifts is that nobody else is supposed

1552
01:11:15,439 --> 01:11:18,120
Speaker 9: to touch them unless their intentions are good and pure.

1553
01:11:18,320 --> 01:11:22,280
Speaker 9: Nobody stealing has good intentions, only selfishness, leading to a

1554
01:11:22,320 --> 01:11:24,760
Speaker 9: new level of anger on our end. If it took

1555
01:11:24,800 --> 01:11:27,920
Speaker 9: her three months to find it and she found it

1556
01:11:28,000 --> 01:11:31,639
Speaker 9: in pieces that we basically had to ring out of her.

1557
01:11:31,960 --> 01:11:34,120
Speaker 9: The second instance was when my youngest got a gift

1558
01:11:34,120 --> 01:11:37,200
Speaker 9: from his great grandmother, who now has full blown dementia.

1559
01:11:37,439 --> 01:11:39,600
Speaker 9: It was a dish set with his favorite character on

1560
01:11:39,640 --> 01:11:40,200
Speaker 9: it read.

1561
01:11:40,040 --> 01:11:41,919
Speaker 4: Me from out of two weeks. Oh oh.

1562
01:11:42,120 --> 01:11:45,599
Speaker 9: She stole the covered bowl and silverware set. We never

1563
01:11:45,720 --> 01:11:48,599
Speaker 9: saw it again. Now for the latest instance, the same

1564
01:11:48,720 --> 01:11:51,200
Speaker 9: great grandmother had made me items for my children and

1565
01:11:51,240 --> 01:11:53,880
Speaker 9: any future children. The box was rather plain and could

1566
01:11:53,880 --> 01:11:55,800
Speaker 9: be mistaken for trash if you didn't know what you

1567
01:11:55,840 --> 01:11:57,880
Speaker 9: were looking at. My husband knows not to touch it

1568
01:11:57,920 --> 01:12:01,439
Speaker 9: and respects all of my boundaries. Inside were culturally significant

1569
01:12:01,479 --> 01:12:03,960
Speaker 9: items and sets of baby booties. Both sets for my

1570
01:12:04,040 --> 01:12:06,920
Speaker 9: children were in there, plus an additional set. I am

1571
01:12:06,960 --> 01:12:10,000
Speaker 9: currently pregnant, and like my daughter, I kept this box

1572
01:12:10,000 --> 01:12:13,000
Speaker 9: in the same spot on my nightstand. I just found

1573
01:12:13,000 --> 01:12:15,479
Speaker 9: out very recently that I'm pregnant and went to grab

1574
01:12:15,520 --> 01:12:17,200
Speaker 9: the booties so I can match the yarn and make

1575
01:12:17,200 --> 01:12:19,400
Speaker 9: a take home blanket like I did with my other

1576
01:12:19,439 --> 01:12:20,240
Speaker 9: two kids.

1577
01:12:20,200 --> 01:12:22,000
Speaker 4: But the box was gone.

1578
01:12:22,120 --> 01:12:24,479
Speaker 9: I had remembered she had used our bathroom the day

1579
01:12:24,520 --> 01:12:26,960
Speaker 9: she left. I tore the house apart for almost two

1580
01:12:26,960 --> 01:12:29,599
Speaker 9: weeks to make sure that it wasn't pregnancy brain before

1581
01:12:29,640 --> 01:12:32,040
Speaker 9: bringing the subject up to my husband. At that point,

1582
01:12:32,160 --> 01:12:35,200
Speaker 9: I burst into tears. My heart is broken and I

1583
01:12:35,280 --> 01:12:38,920
Speaker 9: love her too, but those booties were priceless and irreplaceable.

1584
01:12:39,080 --> 01:12:41,240
Speaker 9: We had not told the kids about the pregnancy yet,

1585
01:12:41,240 --> 01:12:43,760
Speaker 9: as I am prone to spontaneous miscarriages within the first

1586
01:12:43,800 --> 01:12:45,760
Speaker 9: three months. I'm at the end of my three months

1587
01:12:45,840 --> 01:12:48,120
Speaker 9: and was getting excited that this one would be viable.

1588
01:12:48,200 --> 01:12:50,280
Speaker 9: He very calmly reassured me that he knew that I

1589
01:12:50,280 --> 01:12:53,040
Speaker 9: wouldn't accuse without looking first. I have been doing my

1590
01:12:53,080 --> 01:12:55,519
Speaker 9: best when his kids are here, to show them a

1591
01:12:55,600 --> 01:12:58,960
Speaker 9: kind and understanding home. I make it very clear that

1592
01:12:59,000 --> 01:13:01,280
Speaker 9: I'm a supporting person in their life and in no

1593
01:13:01,400 --> 01:13:04,000
Speaker 9: way am I trying to replace their mother. Despite everything,

1594
01:13:04,080 --> 01:13:07,120
Speaker 9: she steal sabotages every visit, and does stuff like this.

1595
01:13:07,280 --> 01:13:09,599
Speaker 9: I told my husband that this was the last straw.

1596
01:13:09,840 --> 01:13:11,760
Speaker 9: She is banned from the house and needs to be

1597
01:13:11,800 --> 01:13:15,080
Speaker 9: properly punished because their gentle methods of making her give

1598
01:13:15,120 --> 01:13:17,800
Speaker 9: items back when she steals have not been working. I

1599
01:13:17,840 --> 01:13:20,759
Speaker 9: am by no means saying spank her, but their methods

1600
01:13:20,800 --> 01:13:24,520
Speaker 9: have proven ineffective. And so has therapy. Her mother counterparents

1601
01:13:24,640 --> 01:13:27,200
Speaker 9: every turn saying that there is no way that her

1602
01:13:27,240 --> 01:13:32,440
Speaker 9: precious child stole anything, despite her stealing thousands, yes thousands

1603
01:13:32,439 --> 01:13:35,479
Speaker 9: from her mother in the past two years alone, with

1604
01:13:35,720 --> 01:13:39,360
Speaker 9: no proper parenting to correct the behaviors. It does honestly

1605
01:13:39,439 --> 01:13:41,160
Speaker 9: break my heart to ban her from the house. But

1606
01:13:41,240 --> 01:13:44,599
Speaker 9: she has now willfully and maliciously caused harm to myself

1607
01:13:44,600 --> 01:13:48,040
Speaker 9: and my children repeatedly. I have given her multiple chances

1608
01:13:48,080 --> 01:13:51,000
Speaker 9: and gone to family therapy. Even her own blood family

1609
01:13:51,200 --> 01:13:54,160
Speaker 9: only allows her where they can see her in their homes.

1610
01:13:54,280 --> 01:13:56,000
Speaker 4: Okay, so this isn't even.

1611
01:13:55,840 --> 01:13:58,599
Speaker 5: Like bobies, you know, it's everyone.

1612
01:13:58,840 --> 01:14:00,360
Speaker 4: It's not an original thought.

1613
01:14:00,560 --> 01:14:04,080
Speaker 9: No, if she quote has to go to the bathroom,

1614
01:14:04,200 --> 01:14:06,000
Speaker 9: they tell her to go home or to hold it.

1615
01:14:06,120 --> 01:14:09,280
Speaker 5: Yeah, that's intense girls a kleptomaniac.

1616
01:14:09,560 --> 01:14:11,960
Speaker 9: Yeah, because it's not even like she's buying things like

1617
01:14:12,360 --> 01:14:13,639
Speaker 9: or stealing things to sell.

1618
01:14:13,720 --> 01:14:15,720
Speaker 4: I mean, you know, she very well could have.

1619
01:14:15,720 --> 01:14:19,280
Speaker 9: Sold that family heirloom yeah whatever, that wasn't assuming some

1620
01:14:19,280 --> 01:14:21,479
Speaker 9: sort of like vase or something. But this thing, like

1621
01:14:21,520 --> 01:14:25,240
Speaker 9: with the booties, that's like clearly a sentimental thing.

1622
01:14:25,360 --> 01:14:25,519
Speaker 5: Yeah.

1623
01:14:26,040 --> 01:14:29,759
Speaker 9: So like that is just straight up like not even

1624
01:14:30,280 --> 01:14:34,479
Speaker 9: selfish reasons. It's fully maliciously. I have tried everything I

1625
01:14:34,479 --> 01:14:36,920
Speaker 9: can think of. I am myself in therapy to be

1626
01:14:36,960 --> 01:14:39,639
Speaker 9: the best supportive stepmother that I can for all of them.

1627
01:14:40,000 --> 01:14:42,760
Speaker 9: But I cannot allow someone so malicious and selfish to

1628
01:14:42,840 --> 01:14:45,439
Speaker 9: keep destroying what few things I have for my family.

1629
01:14:45,520 --> 01:14:47,680
Speaker 9: I lost most of them to war when we were

1630
01:14:47,760 --> 01:14:50,960
Speaker 9: refugees during my childhood. I feel like the ahle because

1631
01:14:51,000 --> 01:14:52,280
Speaker 9: she's a child, but at.

1632
01:14:52,120 --> 01:14:53,880
Speaker 4: Her age I knew not to steal.

1633
01:14:54,040 --> 01:14:56,720
Speaker 9: She has been put through therapy and it's not diagnosed

1634
01:14:56,720 --> 01:15:00,640
Speaker 9: with kleptomania or anything beyond her control. She is just selfish,

1635
01:15:00,760 --> 01:15:02,960
Speaker 9: spoiled and has an If I see it and want

1636
01:15:03,000 --> 01:15:04,760
Speaker 9: it for any reason, I will get it, no.

1637
01:15:04,720 --> 01:15:06,520
Speaker 4: Matter who it hurts attitude.

1638
01:15:06,680 --> 01:15:09,519
Speaker 9: Last Christmas she threw a whole tantrum over getting the

1639
01:15:09,560 --> 01:15:12,759
Speaker 9: wrong colored air pods. She does not have any different

1640
01:15:12,800 --> 01:15:15,720
Speaker 9: mental abilities that would explain any of this either. We

1641
01:15:15,800 --> 01:15:18,880
Speaker 9: had her tested extensively in a great expense to try

1642
01:15:18,880 --> 01:15:22,160
Speaker 9: and help her. There is nothing medically quantifiable that would

1643
01:15:22,200 --> 01:15:24,759
Speaker 9: excuse her behaviors. And like I said, she is almost

1644
01:15:24,840 --> 01:15:27,760
Speaker 9: a legal adult. Am I the a hole? And there

1645
01:15:28,000 --> 01:15:29,160
Speaker 9: is an update?

1646
01:15:29,280 --> 01:15:31,600
Speaker 4: So we have. But do we think that OPI is

1647
01:15:31,760 --> 01:15:33,440
Speaker 4: an a whole? No?

1648
01:15:33,439 --> 01:15:36,760
Speaker 5: No, what how old is this child? I don't understand

1649
01:15:36,880 --> 01:15:37,680
Speaker 5: how old she is.

1650
01:15:37,760 --> 01:15:40,280
Speaker 9: She isn't a little kid almost done with high school.

1651
01:15:40,280 --> 01:15:42,800
Speaker 9: But we do have an update as of last night.

1652
01:15:43,160 --> 01:15:46,200
Speaker 9: They live five hours away one way. My husband has

1653
01:15:46,200 --> 01:15:48,080
Speaker 9: gone there to try and get our stuff back, but

1654
01:15:48,160 --> 01:15:51,439
Speaker 9: the mother, I have dubbed hellbast won't let them on

1655
01:15:51,520 --> 01:15:52,080
Speaker 9: the property.

1656
01:15:52,120 --> 01:15:54,080
Speaker 4: Because this is a direct quote.

1657
01:15:54,320 --> 01:15:57,759
Speaker 10: How dare those low life g words accuse my child?

1658
01:15:57,920 --> 01:16:01,240
Speaker 10: They're known thieves. We have called the cops, but they

1659
01:16:01,320 --> 01:16:04,080
Speaker 10: say it is a silver matter. Cops are useless, especially

1660
01:16:04,160 --> 01:16:06,720
Speaker 10: since they live in an affluent area. Her room has

1661
01:16:06,760 --> 01:16:10,120
Speaker 10: been tossed in the past, she stashes things, and we

1662
01:16:10,200 --> 01:16:12,960
Speaker 10: have no idea where we have a suspicion that her

1663
01:16:13,040 --> 01:16:14,120
Speaker 10: mother helps her directly.

1664
01:16:14,160 --> 01:16:15,160
Speaker 4: After the first.

1665
01:16:14,880 --> 01:16:18,040
Speaker 9: Two instances he was deployed, he did, to his credit,

1666
01:16:18,160 --> 01:16:20,519
Speaker 9: run the whole five hour trip one way to try

1667
01:16:20,560 --> 01:16:22,600
Speaker 9: and get my daughter's stuff back. The X wouldn't let

1668
01:16:22,680 --> 01:16:24,880
Speaker 9: him in and the cops wouldn't do anything. He did

1669
01:16:24,880 --> 01:16:27,280
Speaker 9: not have the same time allowance the second time, I

1670
01:16:27,360 --> 01:16:30,000
Speaker 9: use the verbiage I do because in therapy she demanded

1671
01:16:30,040 --> 01:16:33,320
Speaker 9: I stop treating her and stop talking about her like

1672
01:16:33,400 --> 01:16:35,680
Speaker 9: I do my own kids. The therapist agreed that it

1673
01:16:35,760 --> 01:16:38,960
Speaker 9: was a reasonable ask, and I've treated her warmly and

1674
01:16:39,000 --> 01:16:41,879
Speaker 9: with kindness since she treats me like a servant.

1675
01:16:42,280 --> 01:16:44,960
Speaker 4: My kids are teens. She only was able to.

1676
01:16:44,960 --> 01:16:47,719
Speaker 9: Personally target them one time before going for the dishes.

1677
01:16:47,800 --> 01:16:50,320
Speaker 9: My husband has disowned her as of last night. He

1678
01:16:50,360 --> 01:16:52,759
Speaker 9: said that he will still support her financially, but until

1679
01:16:52,800 --> 01:16:55,879
Speaker 9: she shows and proves changed behaviors, she is not welcomed

1680
01:16:55,880 --> 01:16:57,640
Speaker 9: into our life and will not be meeting her new

1681
01:16:57,680 --> 01:16:59,960
Speaker 9: sibling until she can show that she can be trusted.

1682
01:17:00,120 --> 01:17:03,320
Speaker 9: During one of her tantrums, she broke someone's hand. What

1683
01:17:03,880 --> 01:17:06,040
Speaker 9: I do not trust her around a newborn, and my

1684
01:17:06,120 --> 01:17:08,280
Speaker 9: husband agrees. He told her that the money we have

1685
01:17:08,360 --> 01:17:11,240
Speaker 9: shoveled into the fire paying for her therapy sessions three

1686
01:17:11,280 --> 01:17:14,560
Speaker 9: times a week for almost six years plus testing was

1687
01:17:14,600 --> 01:17:16,680
Speaker 9: a good investment to open his eyes to what a

1688
01:17:16,720 --> 01:17:19,720
Speaker 9: horrible person she grew up to be. She started screaming,

1689
01:17:19,800 --> 01:17:22,080
Speaker 9: and when he told her to return the box because

1690
01:17:22,080 --> 01:17:24,040
Speaker 9: it had baby booties in it, that we need it.

1691
01:17:24,160 --> 01:17:26,880
Speaker 9: We have photos of my son's and daughters booties, and

1692
01:17:26,960 --> 01:17:29,599
Speaker 9: he told me that he knows someone who crochets who

1693
01:17:29,640 --> 01:17:31,880
Speaker 9: will recreate them for me. He said that he knows

1694
01:17:31,960 --> 01:17:34,120
Speaker 9: it's a poor substitute, but that it pains him to

1695
01:17:34,120 --> 01:17:37,639
Speaker 9: see how she has been so malicious with no logical reason.

1696
01:17:37,680 --> 01:17:40,719
Speaker 9: He's also reaching out to artisans to replace my daughter's

1697
01:17:40,720 --> 01:17:43,240
Speaker 9: stuff as well. The items are Middle Eastern, so he

1698
01:17:43,280 --> 01:17:46,200
Speaker 9: asked my family's help to locate someone to recreate them.

1699
01:17:46,240 --> 01:17:46,679
Speaker 4: Exactly.

1700
01:17:46,760 --> 01:17:49,200
Speaker 9: My husband has a big heart and is at times

1701
01:17:49,200 --> 01:17:51,599
Speaker 9: too forgiving, but he is putting his foot down hard.

1702
01:17:51,720 --> 01:17:53,960
Speaker 9: He also ordered a brand new set of the dishes

1703
01:17:54,000 --> 01:17:56,800
Speaker 9: that she stole from my son. She has been screaming

1704
01:17:56,880 --> 01:18:01,920
Speaker 9: and crying, saying that impregnating the help has ruined their

1705
01:18:01,960 --> 01:18:05,479
Speaker 9: family dynamic, going so far as to blame me for

1706
01:18:05,560 --> 01:18:07,080
Speaker 9: her theft in the first place.

1707
01:18:07,960 --> 01:18:11,280
Speaker 5: What is the mom telling her? That's what I want

1708
01:18:11,280 --> 01:18:11,519
Speaker 5: to know.

1709
01:18:11,800 --> 01:18:14,160
Speaker 4: Absolutely, yeah, because that like.

1710
01:18:15,680 --> 01:18:17,479
Speaker 9: If the mom was saying what she said earlier, like,

1711
01:18:17,680 --> 01:18:19,280
Speaker 9: definitely is the mom is.

1712
01:18:19,360 --> 01:18:21,479
Speaker 5: Yeah, the mom helking her? Well, if the mom is

1713
01:18:21,520 --> 01:18:25,120
Speaker 5: all these racist notions against a pee absolutely and no

1714
01:18:25,240 --> 01:18:28,320
Speaker 5: PE's family, then yeah, tracks that she's been poisoning her

1715
01:18:28,400 --> 01:18:31,080
Speaker 5: daughter's mind with all of that, and now the daughter thinks, oh,

1716
01:18:31,080 --> 01:18:34,320
Speaker 5: it's fine to steal from these people, right because they're

1717
01:18:34,479 --> 01:18:36,559
Speaker 5: you know, not deserve it.

1718
01:18:36,640 --> 01:18:38,640
Speaker 9: Yeah, and if yeah, if the mom is you know,

1719
01:18:38,680 --> 01:18:40,479
Speaker 9: we don't know if the mom's helping her hide things,

1720
01:18:40,520 --> 01:18:41,719
Speaker 9: but it's very possible.

1721
01:18:41,800 --> 01:18:42,960
Speaker 4: I would not put it past her.

1722
01:18:43,520 --> 01:18:46,120
Speaker 9: And I do wonder too then, like was there like

1723
01:18:46,160 --> 01:18:50,400
Speaker 9: a messy divorce with with from the husband, because like

1724
01:18:50,600 --> 01:18:54,679
Speaker 9: that could explain that she's just just looking to hurt

1725
01:18:54,760 --> 01:18:57,400
Speaker 9: and just feeling so bitter to the point where she's

1726
01:18:57,560 --> 01:19:00,280
Speaker 9: being extremely racist. She said that I had no right

1727
01:19:00,320 --> 01:19:03,160
Speaker 9: to own anything so precious. She said the same about

1728
01:19:03,160 --> 01:19:04,840
Speaker 9: my daughter and went so far as to say that

1729
01:19:04,880 --> 01:19:07,280
Speaker 9: there's no way that my daughter has accomplished more than

1730
01:19:07,320 --> 01:19:10,880
Speaker 9: her because the help is only there to scrub toilets

1731
01:19:10,920 --> 01:19:12,200
Speaker 9: and be silent.

1732
01:19:12,400 --> 01:19:18,240
Speaker 4: Oh my god, this is this girl stuck, This girl shucks.

1733
01:19:18,280 --> 01:19:19,600
Speaker 4: Oh my goodness.

1734
01:19:19,880 --> 01:19:22,200
Speaker 9: He woke me up with breakfast in bed and then

1735
01:19:22,320 --> 01:19:24,320
Speaker 9: told me today that he's sending me and my daughter

1736
01:19:24,360 --> 01:19:26,519
Speaker 9: to a spa for a day of relaxation while he

1737
01:19:26,560 --> 01:19:29,200
Speaker 9: contacts a lawyer to attempt to legally force her to

1738
01:19:29,200 --> 01:19:32,320
Speaker 9: give the box back, as well as disinheriting her the

1739
01:19:32,360 --> 01:19:34,920
Speaker 9: second she turns eighteen. He's giving my son an option

1740
01:19:35,000 --> 01:19:37,120
Speaker 9: that would appeal to him as well, so he doesn't

1741
01:19:37,120 --> 01:19:39,160
Speaker 9: feel left out. It also came out last night in

1742
01:19:39,200 --> 01:19:43,000
Speaker 9: her screech ramblings that she smashed the dishes out of hatred,

1743
01:19:43,200 --> 01:19:45,479
Speaker 9: saying that my son didn't deserve something like she and

1744
01:19:45,600 --> 01:19:48,160
Speaker 9: her brothers would get since he is the son of

1745
01:19:48,200 --> 01:19:52,080
Speaker 9: the help, we won't be getting those back, So save

1746
01:19:52,240 --> 01:19:54,519
Speaker 9: any of your sympathy for her. Any sympathy that I

1747
01:19:54,600 --> 01:19:58,080
Speaker 9: had flew out the window the millisecond those hate filled

1748
01:19:58,080 --> 01:20:01,120
Speaker 9: words escaped her mouth. Her father told to apologize, and

1749
01:20:01,200 --> 01:20:03,960
Speaker 9: she refuses. He then reminded her that he and not she,

1750
01:20:04,160 --> 01:20:07,519
Speaker 9: had worked hard to accumulate the lifestyle she enjoys. That

1751
01:20:07,600 --> 01:20:10,200
Speaker 9: while I started out cleaning his house, I owned my

1752
01:20:10,240 --> 01:20:13,559
Speaker 9: own businesses. I started while scrubbing other people's toilets, while

1753
01:20:13,600 --> 01:20:16,439
Speaker 9: she doesn't even know how to scrub a dish. That

1754
01:20:16,600 --> 01:20:19,800
Speaker 9: he never saw me as the help, and that's the

1755
01:20:19,840 --> 01:20:20,519
Speaker 9: end of that story.

1756
01:20:20,680 --> 01:20:22,160
Speaker 7: Dang Dang Dan