Speaker 1: I got boo boo boo boo boo. You know what
Speaker 1: that sound means? Time for another episode we knows Parenting.
Speaker 1: I'm Peter McNerney, I'm Bethnel. Did you love that? Should
Speaker 1: I introduce the show that way? Always? No? Cool? All right,
Speaker 1: I'll try it for next week. Um, life is happening,
Speaker 1: that's for sure. What's happening Valine's Day? It's pretty fast.
Speaker 1: If you don't, you don't stop to look around, you
Speaker 1: might just miss it. I was so relieved. Um, last
Speaker 1: night my friend sent me a message just like off
Speaker 1: and talking about her daughter's Valentine's and I was like, oh, right,
Speaker 1: that's the thing. I have to do that now. There's
Speaker 1: so many things to do. Um, So I got Brinson
Speaker 1: like four dollar Valentine's from the CVS, but on my
Speaker 1: list for a while, I knew. I knew that that's
Speaker 1: something we would have to do, not the day before.
Speaker 1: I can't count on him to write twenty one names
Speaker 1: in a single day. So so thank you for doing that.
Speaker 1: And boy, we had time to do it today because
Speaker 1: Brent has a fever. Yeah, fun stuff. I stay at
Speaker 1: home all day. It was very easy. He's not super sick.
Speaker 1: He loves TV. You watched he watched Pinocchio, and then
Speaker 1: he watched The Emperor's New Groove. Then he watched Robin Hood,
Speaker 1: and he watched Fox from the Hound, And then when
Speaker 1: I got home, Maven was watching Wally Well. Then he
Speaker 1: watched Rattatui and then he started watching Before Are there
Speaker 1: in this day? That's like the longest day. He watched
Speaker 1: five full length movies. We also into the bank. We
Speaker 1: went to the store I don't know actually, and we
Speaker 1: got all of his Valentine's cards prepared and written and
Speaker 1: folded in an envelope. I don't think there's that many
Speaker 1: hours in a day. You know, if you make TV
Speaker 1: a priority, it's really incredible what you can do, you
Speaker 1: can accomplish if you really stay set your mind to it. Um. Well,
Speaker 1: Brent's reviews are in. You know what his favorite movie
Speaker 1: of all those was? What? I guess you don't remember
Speaker 1: a single one. I remembered two of them, Um ratati um.
Speaker 1: It was Robin Hood. Although I think maybe I asked
Speaker 1: him the question before he watched Ratty, so you might
Speaker 1: be right, Yeah, I might be so brin after ten
Speaker 1: days of um, what's it called antibiotics? Is im me
Speaker 1: at least sick again, just just a fever. It's probably
Speaker 1: my fault because I did take them outside the home yesterday,
Speaker 1: so I don't take them out the walls. That's where
Speaker 1: that's where it happens. I will say. Our kids get
Speaker 1: these little fevers that are not that bad compared to like,
Speaker 1: I feel like everyone I've been talking to seems to
Speaker 1: be getting the flu or something really gross this year,
Speaker 1: and we've knock on would managed to avoid that. We
Speaker 1: haven't had anything terrible. You just had some gross rashes
Speaker 1: and ear infections and things just tigo and double in tigo.
Speaker 1: I don't know how to say it. I don't know
Speaker 1: how to say it. Anything double ear infection, inexplicable vomit
Speaker 1: what that happens fairly recently with may Ben. But Britain boy,
Speaker 1: he is sick, like he was so like sweet, you
Speaker 1: know that kind of sick where he just gets tired
Speaker 1: and he just like wanders into where I am and
Speaker 1: then sits dound next to me and just like stares
Speaker 1: at the wall and then slowly just puts his head
Speaker 1: down on my leg. I'm just like brit not coming
Speaker 1: in to give a monologue. Yeah, he like wakes up monologueing.
Speaker 1: He's like, today is Monday, and we're doing this even
Speaker 1: when he doesn't want to go. No, I don't want
Speaker 1: to wake up because today's day four in this library,
Speaker 1: day when that was yesterday, and I don't like pe
Speaker 1: and don't give me one Friday before he's opened his eyes. Yeah,
Speaker 1: but tonight he crawled into bed with me and just
Speaker 1: fell asleep before bedtime. So I know that he is thick.
Speaker 1: That in the hundred one temperature he had all day
Speaker 1: m hmm, and he didn't go to the doctor, did
Speaker 1: eat food. It was like one point zero did he
Speaker 1: eat food? I packed him a lunch and so he
Speaker 1: had his packed lunch, but he did not eat very much.
Speaker 1: I kept just trying getting water, and you had a little.
Speaker 1: He had some dinner. But he's this thick boy. Maven's
Speaker 1: just stubborn. She um, I didn't tell you this, but
Speaker 1: like I don't know half hour ago, hour ago, she
Speaker 1: woke up or never had fallen asleep, and she's like
Speaker 1: making noise in there after crying a lot when you
Speaker 1: put her into bed, and then I went in there
Speaker 1: and she was like she keeps saying this like pouty
Speaker 1: thing where she's like just won't move and like doesn't
Speaker 1: like and like. And so she walked over her pajama
Speaker 1: drawer and she opened it and just kept kind of
Speaker 1: doing that, and I was like, what do you want?
Speaker 1: And she like, I wanted to put her pajamas on?
Speaker 1: And I was like, okay, fine, because you because we
Speaker 1: put her to bed in her clothes, which are comfortable clothes,
Speaker 1: she's wearing out of it. There was basically jams and
Speaker 1: Britain was already in bed till the lights were out
Speaker 1: when we came up. Anyway, but I don't know if
Speaker 1: she had, like, I feel like part of her just
Speaker 1: like didn't feel right, not in her pajam It was
Speaker 1: it was not a regular routine. It's like, yeah, she's
Speaker 1: very into that tactile experience. Both of them want to
Speaker 1: want to tell you how things work. Yeah. Um, for
Speaker 1: dinner tonight, I played We played a trivia where I
Speaker 1: gave them both math problems. You would have hated it,
Speaker 1: but I loved it. And up, Matt, Maven's pretty good
Speaker 1: at math. What kind of math problems were you? In? Two?
Speaker 1: She figured it out. I mean she has to look
Speaker 1: at her fingers and put them together. But she's I mean,
Speaker 1: that's math. She figured it out. That's you know, I
Speaker 1: don't know if you know this, but putting up fingers
Speaker 1: and put them together. For our listeners, what Peters explaining
Speaker 1: is if you put up your finger and put them together,
Speaker 1: that's okay. For example, three plus two, hold three fingers
Speaker 1: up on one hand and two on the other, and
Speaker 1: then just push them close to each other and then
Speaker 1: you'll see that there's five fingers. That's really all math is.
Speaker 1: Math is math is fingers. Um. Cool? Yeah, what else
Speaker 1: happened this week? I feel like I'm living in such
Speaker 1: a blur now, although I think our things have finally
Speaker 1: started to settle down around here a little bit. You're back,
Speaker 1: I'm back. You tell us about your book, your whirlwind
Speaker 1: book release party, really great being away from really great whirlwind.
Speaker 1: I I had fun. We had a really great book
Speaker 1: party at um this lesbian bar and babes babes um
Speaker 1: and what else. People who are like people are when
Speaker 1: of them away, are always like, so do your kids
Speaker 1: to see you? Do you really miss your kids? Like
Speaker 1: stuff like that, And I was like, no, it's two nights.
Speaker 1: They barely noticed him gone, Like I because I sometimes
Speaker 1: get home after bedtime from work. It's like, doesn't register
Speaker 1: to them that I've been Oh they missed you. Um,
Speaker 1: they tell me all about it. They tell me how
Speaker 1: much I am not suitable for their needs. What did
Speaker 1: they They usually don't register, though, I feel like, what
Speaker 1: did they say? I want? Mommy? They love you the
Speaker 1: light of their life the world. And I get it
Speaker 1: because I feel the same. Thank you, that's all you acknowledge. Um,
Speaker 1: But well, maybe hold on, can we talk about the
Speaker 1: fact that you got a tattoo? Oh? Yeah, Well I
Speaker 1: got a tattoo while I was the way and Maven
Speaker 1: says that it's not a tattoo because when she feels it,
Speaker 1: it's flat, and she said, that's nothing. That's not a tattoo. Um.
Speaker 1: I explained to them that it's permanent. And I said,
Speaker 1: what's permanent mean? I was like forever? And then Brin
Speaker 1: like like see him piecings together like mommy chose to
Speaker 1: have a thing on her arm forever. Then he goes,
Speaker 1: but when will it wash off? Like it doesn't it's
Speaker 1: a real tattoo. Well, it's funny. So the tattoo I got. Um.
Speaker 1: For those of you who don't follow me, on Instagram.
Speaker 1: You'll have to buy the book. You'll have to buy
Speaker 1: the book. But it's it's it's an illustration from me
Speaker 1: and Jackie's book. There's no manual, honest and Cory wisdom
Speaker 1: about having a baby, and it's Um, it's based on
Speaker 1: the Benjamin Franklin political cartoon of the Colonies when it
Speaker 1: says Joe join or die. But ours it's a snake
Speaker 1: that's chopped into thirteen pieces like the Colonies, right, yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: but our version has a bunch of boobs all over it.
Speaker 1: So it's a lady snake. Yeah, it's it's got little eyelashes.
Speaker 1: And when Brin like, what my sister is asking about it?
Speaker 1: Brenn kept trying to explain it, and he was like,
Speaker 1: she was like, it's a cut up snake. It's a
Speaker 1: cut up snake. Like, he's not wrong, He's not wrong.
Speaker 1: It's a cut up snake. Um. The weird thing is
Speaker 1: is that you and Jackie told me about the tattoos
Speaker 1: while recording last week's podcast, and it did not register
Speaker 1: in my brain that that it was a real thing. Yeah,
Speaker 1: you thought it was a joke. No. For some reason,
Speaker 1: I think I was just so wrapped up in the
Speaker 1: tech and the recording. Yeah, you were a little like
Speaker 1: detached last week as we're we I think we're all
Speaker 1: very tired and trying to record remotely the telephone has
Speaker 1: a delay. Um, but yeah, it was fun until Jackie
Speaker 1: sent me a picture your arm and I was like, mhmm, Yeah,
Speaker 1: that seems like something Beth wouldn't tell me about until
Speaker 1: it's over because she doesn't want my opinion on it.
Speaker 1: And that's fine. Yeah, it's the most you thing you've
Speaker 1: ever done. Well. The thing is, sometimes I even though
Speaker 1: I know I don't I'm not going to consider someone's opinion.
Speaker 1: It's very hard two listen to people's opinions. Oh I know,
Speaker 1: I mean I don't know. I under I know that
Speaker 1: about you. I can't say that I understand it because
Speaker 1: my brain doesn't work at all. I need validation. But
Speaker 1: there's no judgment. I mean I think I used to
Speaker 1: judge you feel like you said in a like a
Speaker 1: recent episode where you're like, I just don't think about
Speaker 1: what people think of me, And I was like, I
Speaker 1: feel like it's not entirely a woman thing, but I
Speaker 1: do think it's not. It doesn't help being a woman
Speaker 1: that everyone expects you to care about their feelings all
Speaker 1: the time, and so I feel like it's sort of
Speaker 1: a privilege that you don't have that wired into your brain.
Speaker 1: On a deep, uncomfortable level, it's totally different. I don't
Speaker 1: remember the context of me saying that, but it is
Speaker 1: a lie. If I if I said I don't care
Speaker 1: what people think, but I think I can let things go,
Speaker 1: I can let more pass through me. I'm working on it,
Speaker 1: You're doing it, doesn't I think what doesn't help is
Speaker 1: that I really am like I can feel what people
Speaker 1: are feeling in any moment, regardless of what they're saying,
Speaker 1: and it's really hard to tune out of that and
Speaker 1: be like I'm just like great, I know you are
Speaker 1: judging me. Um anyway, sometimes I just like to do
Speaker 1: stuff without talking to anyone about it. Because what did
Speaker 1: you did you think that I would not want you
Speaker 1: to get a tattoom. I don't think I didn't think
Speaker 1: you would say that. I think you would be like, well,
Speaker 1: it's a thing you can do, like it would there
Speaker 1: would be like imply judgment, Like when I texted when
Speaker 1: I texted you the photo of it, you texted back
Speaker 1: and said, I love you. And I was with Jackie
Speaker 1: and she was like, what did he say when he
Speaker 1: showed him? And she I thold, I told her what
Speaker 1: he said. Then she laughed because she was like, it's
Speaker 1: just so implied. It's like, I love you in spite
Speaker 1: of this thing. Either way. Texted that to me and
Speaker 1: you went you want to know? Went through went through
Speaker 1: my mind? What I said. There is nothing I could
Speaker 1: say that won't be interpreted that way. So my reply
Speaker 1: I was like, I want to I Beth didn't tell me.
Speaker 1: She's going to assume that I'm judgment all about this,
Speaker 1: so I'm literally just going to it in the most
Speaker 1: positive way I possibly could. I liked the reply, but
Speaker 1: it was just very funny. I know that's so. I mean,
Speaker 1: that was my intention is to show you that I
Speaker 1: support you, but I understand it might have come across
Speaker 1: this mar my flesh. Um I support yeah, um yeah.
Speaker 1: There There would be a different time in my life
Speaker 1: where I think you told me at one point you
Speaker 1: think my game tattoo a long time ago, and my
Speaker 1: reaction was like, why would why would Why did you
Speaker 1: want to do that? Because I wouldn't. But I'm not you, yeah,
Speaker 1: and you're not me We've since had to discuss a
Speaker 1: lot of things about my body and what how I
Speaker 1: wanted it to go down with my own body. What
Speaker 1: we've had to to Aldren. Oh, yes, yes, we have
Speaker 1: talked about yours about my body have been the subject
Speaker 1: of much discussion. I thought about it more than I
Speaker 1: had at one point in my life. Yeah. Um, well,
Speaker 1: it's a funny. It is a perfect tattoo for you thematically, Um,
Speaker 1: it also looks really cool and then you look close
Speaker 1: and you're like, oh, this is absurd. That's got like
Speaker 1: a bunch of little titties on it. I'm sorry, that's
Speaker 1: how I want people to look at me and be like,
Speaker 1: this looks really cool. Oh, this is absurd. I'm really
Speaker 1: uncomfortable with how many times I've said the word titties tonight.
Speaker 1: What a terrible word. Well, how else do you describe
Speaker 1: snake breasts? Well, as Jackie said, it's a tad snake
Speaker 1: and there just what it is. I think it's funny.
Speaker 1: It's funny that like a lot of people like whenever
Speaker 1: you're kind of a woman doing anything, whenever you're kind
Speaker 1: of a woman doing anything, men like to come over
Speaker 1: and observe the curiosity of women. And so when I
Speaker 1: was getting the tattoo by Jackie's mom friend who was
Speaker 1: really cool tattoo artist in Richmond, these guys would wander
Speaker 1: over who worked there and just like inspect the tattoo
Speaker 1: and then not say a word and walk away. You know,
Speaker 1: they're thinking it's na Yeah, they're like tiss snake. I
Speaker 1: think I was really thinking it tonight, Like I was like,
Speaker 1: I feel like I don't know if it was this
Speaker 1: tattoo or what, but I was out tonight and I
Speaker 1: felt like these guys were eyeing me in a weird way,
Speaker 1: and I was like, oh, it's like it doesn't matter
Speaker 1: how like grotesquely feminist anything you do, men will somehow
Speaker 1: reinterpret it as like an invitation for them, like they're
Speaker 1: you know, like it's just it's just like there's something
Speaker 1: very confused thing about first of all, breasts on a reptile,
Speaker 1: but breast on a snake, which is which is our thing?
Speaker 1: It's very phallic. Yeah, it's a big penis a snake.
Speaker 1: I don't think a snake is your thing? Is snakes
Speaker 1: are associated with like Eve and like evil women, Medusa.
Speaker 1: But you can have that too. Fine, we can't even
Speaker 1: be evil anymore. Fine, you can be evil. I'm just saying.
Speaker 1: It's very phallic a snake, but it's also it's a
Speaker 1: it's a flaccid penis, So it's evil and angry and
Speaker 1: we and then you put boobs all on it, and
Speaker 1: so it's it's a symbol. It's a symbol of emasculation.
Speaker 1: That's what how they read it. I was going for
Speaker 1: I don't believe anything I'm saying. I'm just going for
Speaker 1: it anyway. Um, it's really turned me into very very
Speaker 1: sexy woman. And now it's time for do you know
Speaker 1: what they said? What they're saying? Do you know? Do
Speaker 1: you know what they said? Um? This is where we
Speaker 1: dropped some quotes from our kids. That's where we dropped
Speaker 1: some quote them. Um, so my sister was here and
Speaker 1: I was in the other room, and Brynn was like
Speaker 1: getting himself a drink or something in the in the kitchen,
Speaker 1: and we heard like a clatter, and then he goes,
Speaker 1: why do I always get a problem with cups? It's
Speaker 1: very true. That's I call I call that character, Uncle Bren.
Speaker 1: What's it? What's up with me and cups? Yeah, that's
Speaker 1: been happening a lot where he pulls out a gallon
Speaker 1: of milk that he's not strong enough. He doesn't understand
Speaker 1: that two inches of milk is a different weight than
Speaker 1: a full gallon of milk. Right, He's just it's like
Speaker 1: he's a child, so it's almost like he's five. He's
Speaker 1: so bad at it. Yeah, it trys crazy. Um um, Yeah,
Speaker 1: that's all I had for that quote. Say it again.
Speaker 1: Why do I always got a problem with cups? What
Speaker 1: do I always got a problem with cups? That's his
Speaker 1: first album right there. Yeah, they're going hard on towards
Speaker 1: independence these days, they're going hard toward independence. Yeah, in
Speaker 1: their own ways. Um Bryn, Oh gosh, I don't think
Speaker 1: I already talked about this, but you know, he's it's
Speaker 1: dawning on him that we're moving, and he's blabbing to
Speaker 1: everybody about the fact, because you know, we're moving to Brooklyn.
Speaker 1: Oh you didn't hear we're moving to Brooklyn, m A.
Speaker 1: And um. We visited his new school. It's a smaller
Speaker 1: school and every there's a lot of kids sick. When
Speaker 1: he went and visited, and he noticed that the class
Speaker 1: had like eight kids in the class and there's only
Speaker 1: one boy. And he was so scared. I didn't think
Speaker 1: you really registered that. But later, no, I think he
Speaker 1: registered it because you set it out loud in front
Speaker 1: of him. You really his class is only going to
Speaker 1: have like two boys. No, no, no, I never said it.
Speaker 1: He I said that after he brought it up to me.
Speaker 1: This is a while ago, because he started saying, am
Speaker 1: I going to be here for this birthday? This my
Speaker 1: friend's birthday? And he goes, well, I'm only going to
Speaker 1: have one friend that the boy. And I was like why,
Speaker 1: and then it dawned at me, the oh there was
Speaker 1: one bull that class, And I selfishly want him to
Speaker 1: be in a class. Holy girl, Well, I mean I
Speaker 1: want him to have like being a boy is like
Speaker 1: an important thing to him in this moment. Yeah, you know,
Speaker 1: I don't want him to have no boys in his class.
Speaker 1: I just like the heavy ratio. It's gonna be the thing,
Speaker 1: you know where it's so we have no idea what
Speaker 1: this mix of kids is going to be. And it's
Speaker 1: going to be a smaller group, um because it's a
Speaker 1: newer school. So the older grades, um, which is when
Speaker 1: he goes up to second grade right now, uh, is smaller.
Speaker 1: So there could be you know, four boys in the class.
Speaker 1: I was in a class when I moved to Minnesota,
Speaker 1: I was in a three, four or five class. It
Speaker 1: was a weird like progressive mix them all up to
Speaker 1: teachers had grades one through five, and one class had
Speaker 1: one two and half of three, and the other class
Speaker 1: had the other half of three and four and five.
Speaker 1: And then you'd they'd switched teachers during the day. It
Speaker 1: was just a sort of it's called continuous progress. So
Speaker 1: you had they were like and a one and a
Speaker 1: two and one to learn. Uh no, you were with
Speaker 1: the same two teachers for five years, and it was
Speaker 1: this you know, that's a bad idea. It was a
Speaker 1: bad It didn't work for me because there were three
Speaker 1: boys my age and ah, and so I remember going
Speaker 1: home crying every day because the girls made fun of me.
Speaker 1: Very traumatic childhood. You've had, um. They called me Petriot,
Speaker 1: the portable party. I think we've discussed this on this podcast.
Speaker 1: The trauma of my childhood the incredible. I don't want
Speaker 1: to continue tie about it because I know it's so hard.
Speaker 1: Free I'm strong now, Okay, Petrie. It's probably two days
Speaker 1: of my life that I stretched out as the whole
Speaker 1: into the whole year, it's really become a defining moment
Speaker 1: of your life. I um back to the topic of
Speaker 1: our children trying to express their independence. Maven has asserted
Speaker 1: herself this week in her desire to grow out her bangs.
Speaker 1: That's right, mom, Like, she wants to look like me.
Speaker 1: I'm like, I'm weirdly shocked by this because I remember
Speaker 1: deciding at like age five or six that I was
Speaker 1: done with bangs and I wanted to grow them out,
Speaker 1: and I thought they were like baby ish, and so
Speaker 1: the fact that Mayven is having this epiphany at three
Speaker 1: feels like very mature to me, And I'm like, how
Speaker 1: are you so aware? Like she's been trying to She's
Speaker 1: been talking about getting rid of her banks for a while,
Speaker 1: like every haircut, and she thought we should cut them off,
Speaker 1: and then we've explained to her over and over again
Speaker 1: that you have to grow them out, and she now
Speaker 1: she's determined to do that. Like she's like, I don't
Speaker 1: want bangs, I want to look like mommy, which is
Speaker 1: very flattering. Yeah, well, I don't think it's it's not
Speaker 1: the she doesn't associate them with being baby ish. No,
Speaker 1: that was my baggage, my bank. I mean give it
Speaker 1: a couple of years and she'll get there, but by
Speaker 1: then that that's how long it takes to grow banks.
Speaker 1: I am like, part of me is like, oh, she
Speaker 1: looks so cute with bangs. But I also am like'
Speaker 1: so impressed that she has an opinion that I'm like, sure,
Speaker 1: grow out your banks, um. But it's just so funny.
Speaker 1: It's just so maven that she's like so aware of
Speaker 1: this at three. I don't know how it came up,
Speaker 1: Like one of us must have asked her at some point.
Speaker 1: I think it's just the process of her, Like when
Speaker 1: I was like trimming her bangs and stuff and talking
Speaker 1: about her bangs, she like this realization that not everyone
Speaker 1: has banks. Boy, I went to a bad barbershop. Yeah,
Speaker 1: our kids got some not great haircuts. They're fine, They're fine.
Speaker 1: They're not straight or even better than what our kids
Speaker 1: looked like before they went to get their haircut. They
Speaker 1: look good, They're fine. I went there and this place
Speaker 1: this happened to me before, where I made a reservation
Speaker 1: and then I showed up at the right time an
Speaker 1: appointment rather and uh, I waited an hour. I was like,
Speaker 1: why did I have an appointment? And then I watched,
Speaker 1: so I didn't make one. I just showed up and
Speaker 1: they're like, yeah, go ahead, you're next. It was eleven
Speaker 1: o'clock that we sat down as this smaller kid was
Speaker 1: finishing up, and then this family arrived and they had
Speaker 1: an eleven o'clock appointment and they said, okay, just wait
Speaker 1: and there's one barber. Um. I get it though, like
Speaker 1: when you're in the kid's haircut business, it's got to
Speaker 1: be like feast or famine. And so there's like most
Speaker 1: days of week, no one's walking in there, and then
Speaker 1: all of a sudden, there's all these tired parents running
Speaker 1: in on a Saturday morning and like they're like, yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: I just come in now. We'll try to squeeze you
Speaker 1: all in because that's their payday, that's when they cash
Speaker 1: in on kids. But they have zero customers. Are that
Speaker 1: no one's going, we'll try to squeeze you in. They
Speaker 1: just said okay, great and they gesture over and I
Speaker 1: just hear this parent, this couple next to us, being
Speaker 1: so stressed, like did you make an appointment at eleven? Yeah?
Speaker 1: And then both these people ahead of this like, yes,
Speaker 1: should we go have lunch and come back. I'll go ask,
Speaker 1: and he goes, if we go to lunch, and they
Speaker 1: had to explain if they go to lunch and we
Speaker 1: come back, will we have our place? And this woman
Speaker 1: just kept being like, yeah, you can come back if
Speaker 1: you want. And they realized like, oh this, he's not
Speaker 1: making any promise. No one's gonna make any effort. Another
Speaker 1: couple came in and they were like, oh, is it
Speaker 1: gonna be a while? Can I come back at And
Speaker 1: she goes sure, And that was like so many people
Speaker 1: are gonna walk in and people did? I saw exactly.
Speaker 1: I respect that the like that she's like, this is
Speaker 1: my business model. You you either accept it or you
Speaker 1: don't see. The thing is that it's not even that deliberate.
Speaker 1: It's just, oh yeah, each haircut takes fifteen minutes. I
Speaker 1: haven't noticed that all of them take thirty five mm hmmm,
Speaker 1: I don't know. And then Berne Guy's haircut and I
Speaker 1: told this woman, I was like, sure it was shortened
Speaker 1: up the sides in the back, let's we can keep
Speaker 1: the top of the longer. He's got a lot of
Speaker 1: cow licks. And she goes okay, and she does the
Speaker 1: back insides and did not touch his bangs, which went down,
Speaker 1: passed into his eyes, and then I realized, oh, this
Speaker 1: woman does not speak literally a word of English. You know,
Speaker 1: she's tired. She's making like twenty bucks of haircut or whatever.
Speaker 1: I don't know. I gave her a good tip, but
Speaker 1: then I was I had to be like, hey, could
Speaker 1: you do the bangs? And I felt bad because the
Speaker 1: couples almost their turn. It was stressful. Well it all
Speaker 1: worked out. M That's how I feel this week. Well,
Speaker 1: I think, you know, something's going on astrologically. And then
Speaker 1: today was the day where you could stand a broom
Speaker 1: on its end because the gravity was so strong according
Speaker 1: to NASA or something. Did you see that what people
Speaker 1: on social media were like standing brooms like on the
Speaker 1: bristle end, like upright and they would just like stand
Speaker 1: because gravity stronger. I don't know. I never, like, I
Speaker 1: just saw people sharing pictures and then I never during
Speaker 1: the course of the day saw like the original source material.
Speaker 1: So it could be a total scam or it could drill.
Speaker 1: You're just describing the Internet, aren't you. I am? But
Speaker 1: boy I am. This next segment is called would you Knows?
Speaker 1: It's where we present each other with parenting hypotheticals. Okay, Beth,
Speaker 1: you ready for this. I've written to would you know scenario?
Speaker 1: I warn you it's very stupid. Okay, So this is
Speaker 1: the future. Maven is a full grown adult as his brit.
Speaker 1: But Maven comes to you and says, she she gives
Speaker 1: you the news that she found out that she's unable
Speaker 1: to have her own children. Um, she's wait, she gives
Speaker 1: me the news, she tells you. Um. And so she's
Speaker 1: jumping on a new fad that's happening, you know, because
Speaker 1: it's twenty thirty five ish around there, um, which is
Speaker 1: cloning has become a big thing. Okay, So she's twenty three,
Speaker 1: and let's say she's thirty Okay, okay, and cloning has
Speaker 1: become normal. Seven years from now, cloning becomes completely normal. Yeah.
Speaker 1: It starts in like two years, and we all freak
Speaker 1: out about it, and then enough people do it and
Speaker 1: we're like we're just like whatever, whatever. Everyone's a clowne.
Speaker 1: Their clones are like egg egg accounts on Twitter, and
Speaker 1: we're like we're people to just the new avatars. I
Speaker 1: love the way this world is going. So Maven tells
Speaker 1: you she's very excited. She comes up and goes mom
Speaker 1: I'm going to be a mom and um, I'm having
Speaker 1: a baby and I've decided it's a clone of you. Wow,
Speaker 1: And she's looking at you expecting you to be excited.
Speaker 1: This is what scares me about her love of me sometimes,
Speaker 1: as I'm like, I'm like, did I train her to
Speaker 1: be this way? Like? Am I this much of a narcissist?
Speaker 1: That I made her think that she's supposed to be
Speaker 1: obsessed with me? Do you know what I mean? Like,
Speaker 1: that's like because you don't even you don't even know
Speaker 1: that your natural mode is hard to get so our
Speaker 1: kids are are thirsty for your presence. Yeah. Um, but
Speaker 1: I think if she had to clone me, like and
Speaker 1: I'm this, this is twenty seven years from now, I'm fifty, no,
Speaker 1: sixty one. And that was really impressive actually that I
Speaker 1: just did that math. I didn't check it. It just
Speaker 1: sounded about right. Okay, So I'm in my sixties. I've got,
Speaker 1: you know, any thirty years left on this planet. At most,
Speaker 1: I like cloning a new me. It's not going to
Speaker 1: be me, it's going to be a new person that
Speaker 1: happens to share my jeans. I gotta say, so far,
Speaker 1: you're taking this pretty well. I Here's where it worries
Speaker 1: me is that I am not an ideal genetic specimen
Speaker 1: in terms of health and wellness. Um, you know, like,
Speaker 1: but you made it to sixty one, so you and
Speaker 1: I look great. I mean it's implied, but in this scenario,
Speaker 1: you look great. I do because my daughter is like,
Speaker 1: I want to raise someone who ages like that. Yeah. Um,
Speaker 1: but seriously, you look you. Every day i've known you,
Speaker 1: you're You've looked more beautiful than the last continued. The
Speaker 1: thing is, my body is so beautiful, but it's not
Speaker 1: holding up right overall. You know, allergies, thyroid cancer, it's
Speaker 1: seasonal depression. It's not like three year old of me
Speaker 1: things you do it just vibe well. Yeah, but on
Speaker 1: the inside, UM, I don't. I wouldn't like in the
Speaker 1: future where we have the ability to clone people, I
Speaker 1: wouldn't necessarily wish these genes on to someone. Yeah, but
Speaker 1: that's not why she's doing it. Yeah, I mean it
Speaker 1: would be weirder if she owned herself. Boy, what that's
Speaker 1: something that would be weirder. Weirder. I think I'm gonna
Speaker 1: I'm gonna do it right this time. My parents sucked
Speaker 1: it up and I'm gonna raise me the way I
Speaker 1: wish I had been raised. There's part of me that's
Speaker 1: into it because like raising Maven, I see so much
Speaker 1: of my face in her and some other characteristics in
Speaker 1: terms of like personality traits. But like watching her grow
Speaker 1: up makes me like it feels like I'm I learned
Speaker 1: to love myself in a way that is difficult, where
Speaker 1: like I'm like, oh, like those cheeks are cute, Like
Speaker 1: that's like, that's a cute person who looks like me.
Speaker 1: I guess I don't look disgusting like like, it's just
Speaker 1: as a woman, I feel like most of us are
Speaker 1: just so trained to be like, well, everything about me
Speaker 1: is wrong and bad and should have been fixed and
Speaker 1: like so to see a smaller version of yourself like
Speaker 1: and to love it on unquestioningly, Yeah, to love it like,
Speaker 1: I think that would be an interesting exercise and like,
Speaker 1: if that's part of my fate on this planet, I
Speaker 1: guess I'll hear. Oh boy, that's the ultimate therapy, is
Speaker 1: to raise your own clone baby, to realize that you're beautiful. Yeah,
Speaker 1: because of course we would look at a lot but wonderful.
Speaker 1: I mean, you've watched the episode of Disney pluses Encore
Speaker 1: where they make they hold up a hedge, So okay,
Speaker 1: so you haven't watched Encore. They remount us high school
Speaker 1: production of a Way thirty years later with the original cast,
Speaker 1: and so it's like a high school reunion where they
Speaker 1: come back and do the show and it's a perfect concept.
Speaker 1: But they do this segment where they hold up a
Speaker 1: picture of themselves from like high school or they like
Speaker 1: imagine high school and like what would you say? And
Speaker 1: everyone always just starts bawling. But this is the ultimate
Speaker 1: version of that. My friend Annie is starting a website
Speaker 1: where women or anyone can write letters to their former selves. Um.
Speaker 1: It's coming out in March. I think it's called Dispatch
Speaker 1: from the Daybreak. Um. And I've read some of her
Speaker 1: samples from when she was doing the letter collecting and
Speaker 1: it's like so emotional, O my god. Um, Like I
Speaker 1: read this one from this woman I know who was
Speaker 1: writing to her pre sober self and it was just like,
Speaker 1: I don't know, it's like such a powerful reminder of
Speaker 1: like how much we change over the course of like
Speaker 1: ten twenty years or whatever. Like it's just like, oh,
Speaker 1: like things felt so horrible at that point. And then
Speaker 1: you get through it. Yeah, oh my god, it really
Speaker 1: is because I you watch it's exactly that segment of
Speaker 1: the TV show where you watch these people with their
Speaker 1: eyes closed and they're doing this like thought exercise. Like
Speaker 1: I look next to you and there you are in
Speaker 1: high school and you're right there that old haircut, and
Speaker 1: everyone just immediately with their eyes closed, like starts sobbing sobbing,
Speaker 1: and it's like, what what do you need to tell yourself?
Speaker 1: And everyone has the perfect thing to say, because no
Speaker 1: one knows that person more than they do. And it's
Speaker 1: it's this like they're self deprecating but earnest, and it's
Speaker 1: not self congratulatory, and it's not self pitying because they've
Speaker 1: like because they've like personified themselves. Uh, it's this weird.
Speaker 1: It's so hard to mock. Yeah, it's beautiful. Yeah that's
Speaker 1: the word I ask playing for. What is the word?
Speaker 1: You know? Hard to mock? Beautiful? Um, so let's say
Speaker 1: may even does you're like, okay, great, have have my
Speaker 1: clone baby? Ah, so you'll you'd see that clone become
Speaker 1: an adult and it would look exactly like you. Yeah.
Speaker 1: I would always be saying like confusing things to her
Speaker 1: like like in the guise of the those like letters
Speaker 1: to your form herself, like like it's okay, and she's like, no,
Speaker 1: it's fine. We all have like universal health care, and
Speaker 1: like like, no, listen to me. If Tony Miller invites
Speaker 1: you to the Hollywood video, don't go gamema, what are
Speaker 1: you talking about? Hollywood Video? When I moved to New
Speaker 1: York City, there was a Hollywood Video three blocks for me.
Speaker 1: That's how long do I remember? Hollywood Video? Yeah? Blockbuster?
Speaker 1: Remember Blockbuster? I worked there for three summers. Great job.
Speaker 1: I just tried to remember the name of my town's
Speaker 1: independent video store, and it's gone. I was just about
Speaker 1: to say, you had legitimately a far off look on
Speaker 1: your face. I was envisioning it in my mind, that
Speaker 1: warm feeling but going into your like a local, dingy
Speaker 1: little store. We had Hotline Video and we had box
Speaker 1: Office Video, and I would get him mixed up and
Speaker 1: I would sing the Blockbuster song for Blockbuster song. You
Speaker 1: to be Blockbuster video. Wow, What a difference. But I
Speaker 1: would sink box Office video, which is wrong, not that
Speaker 1: I'm thinking about it. Blockbuster video. Wow, what a difference
Speaker 1: difference from what your parents videos. Oh you know what
Speaker 1: what I'm calling it. We're going to bed. Um. Yeah,
Speaker 1: there's been another episode of We Knows Parenting. Um, we're
Speaker 1: going out of town next week, so some I don't know. Oh.
Speaker 1: Check out Peter on the latest episode of High Maintenance
Speaker 1: on HBO. He has a very brief appearance. Blink and
Speaker 1: you'll miss it, baby, But don't blink and you'll love it.
Speaker 1: Don't blink for the whole episode and you'll love that.
Speaker 1: I'm there and I look like the guy, and that's
Speaker 1: how I got the party. By my book, We Knows
Speaker 1: Knows what the title of the book is, That's what
Speaker 1: I'm saying. The title of the book is, there's no manual,
Speaker 1: honest and glory with him about having a baby. Where
Speaker 1: were you I books right now? Um, Please write us
Speaker 1: an email, send us some advice, ask us a question,
Speaker 1: send us so would you know scenario? Tell us about yourself,
Speaker 1: tell us about a current parenting victory or failure. You
Speaker 1: can email us at we knows pot at gmail dot com,
Speaker 1: or you can leave us a voicemail at three four
Speaker 1: seven three eight four seven three. Find us on social
Speaker 1: media's Twitter, Instagram, Facebook, and We Knows Pod rate review, subscribe,
Speaker 1: rate my book on Amazon with five stars five stars,
Speaker 1: and say this book will destroy your lack of baby knowledge. Great, yeah,
Speaker 1: say that, Say that, and we'll see you next time, babe.