Speaker 1: You guys. You guys, Hello, my bunnies, It's me Art
Speaker 1: Marine and guess what we are doing an episode of
Speaker 1: Feeling Thorny every Friday leading up to the publication of
Speaker 1: my book, which is just six and a half weeks away.
Speaker 1: It comes out Tuesday, September twenty nine. And we got
Speaker 1: such a great response. I know you guys really enjoyed
Speaker 1: learning about Rob Benedict, and I have to be honest
Speaker 1: with you, I'm so grateful that we recorded these before
Speaker 1: the whole pandemic happened. We recorded this one in December. Um,
Speaker 1: Lauren Lobkis and I had just gone to New York
Speaker 1: together and I was asking her. I was like, I
Speaker 1: want to do something just sort of leading up to
Speaker 1: the publication of my book because I've had such a
Speaker 1: good time. As I mentioned last time, the publisher requested
Speaker 1: and a chapter about how I got from a small
Speaker 1: farm town with three thousand people in Rhode Island to
Speaker 1: getting to be on a on a TV show by
Speaker 1: my early twenties. And and um, I remember when I
Speaker 1: was writing it, it felt incredibly painful to write. I
Speaker 1: felt like, who do you think you are? You're not
Speaker 1: Meryl Streep, like blah blah blah. So what. But I
Speaker 1: realized if I was a young version of me, if
Speaker 1: I was like eight year old Arden, I would I
Speaker 1: would want to know how somebody did that. And then
Speaker 1: I realized, like, oh, so many of my friends also
Speaker 1: grew up in small towns or did not grow up
Speaker 1: in Los Angeles or New York. They did not grow
Speaker 1: up with connections. And it made me really curious about
Speaker 1: how people got started, what their families were like, and
Speaker 1: what made them tick. And so we recorded this in December, Anna,
Speaker 1: you were there. Lauren Lobkis, who is the star of
Speaker 1: The Wrong Missy, which if you guys have not seen that,
Speaker 1: it is so far. How good is Lauren in the
Speaker 1: Wrong Missy? She's great. I that movie really made me laugh.
Speaker 1: I mean, honestly so as a Netflix movie. It's it
Speaker 1: came out during the pandemic. She plays the Wrong Missy
Speaker 1: and she it is such a star turn. I would
Speaker 1: say there's at least a dozen hard belly laughs, like
Speaker 1: it's she's such a star. And you know, there's so
Speaker 1: many other things that we talked about that you know
Speaker 1: her from, but that's the most recent thing. Um, And
Speaker 1: she's just a really nice person and I just found her.
Speaker 1: She's such a hard worker and she's such a good friend.
Speaker 1: And I'm so excited for you guys to just get
Speaker 1: to know a lot of the people from our podcast,
Speaker 1: a lot of my friends a little bit better and
Speaker 1: just to sort of these are a little more intimate,
Speaker 1: a little more personal, and I hope you guys enjoy
Speaker 1: our second installment of Feeling Thorny with the lovely Laurens.
Speaker 1: Welcome to Will You Accept This Rose, a production of
Speaker 1: I Heart Radio. You know what time it is. It's
Speaker 1: time for hard to get a little close and a
Speaker 1: little thorny. Well, it's gonna go one on one, gonna
Speaker 1: be hot energy phone convos are gonna be super real.
Speaker 1: She wants to get with you and all the fields.
Speaker 1: Feeling thorny, Yeah, feeling thorny. Whoa healing thy feeling thorny.
Speaker 1: We're notting movie, Yeah, healing thorny. Oh yeah, this is exciting.
Speaker 1: This is our first sidecar. It's our sidecar true, Yes,
Speaker 1: where you reach up this road. And guess what, guys,
Speaker 1: we have a new off sheet of the podcast for everybody,
Speaker 1: for everybody. Yeah, yes, we accept this role. Oh my gosh, Hello,
Speaker 1: welcome to Will You Accept This Rose? My name is
Speaker 1: Arta Marine, and I am so excited to introduce a
Speaker 1: special side car offshoot of our podcast that I actually
Speaker 1: came up with with our first guest. Um. One of
Speaker 1: the things I came up with this podcast, I think
Speaker 1: three or four years ago, thinking it would just be
Speaker 1: a fun thing to do to talk about The Bachelor
Speaker 1: with other funny people, break it down, you know, just
Speaker 1: just I thought it would just mostly be about the
Speaker 1: television show. And one of the things I found is
Speaker 1: that I am naturally a slightly socially anxious person and
Speaker 1: it has expanded my life so much. I've gotten so
Speaker 1: many new friends because of this podcast, and I feel
Speaker 1: like I've been through so much in my life that
Speaker 1: as you guys have gotten to know me and you've
Speaker 1: emailed in and I've gotten to know you, I feel
Speaker 1: like it's truly the most important social action that I
Speaker 1: have in my life today. And with that, as my
Speaker 1: life is expanded. I actually sold a book that you
Speaker 1: can pre order now on Amazon. Apparently it's all about
Speaker 1: the pre orders if you want to get on the
Speaker 1: New York Times bestseller Listen. I'm not gonna act like
Speaker 1: I don't. It's called Little Miss Little Compton and it's
Speaker 1: about it's funny stories about me growing up in Hollywood
Speaker 1: and stuff like that. But um, this is a podcast
Speaker 1: where I'm going to interview people in the sort of
Speaker 1: a more one on one intimate way and um, leading
Speaker 1: up to the launch of my book this fall. So
Speaker 1: I could not be more excited we came up with this.
Speaker 1: This sidecar is called feeling a thorny. My my tongue
Speaker 1: said thorny when I did it, and that's gonna be
Speaker 1: every time. So you've heard a laugh. My first guest
Speaker 1: with me. You might know her from Orange Is a
Speaker 1: New Black. You might know her from Crashing. You might
Speaker 1: know her from the Between Two Ferns movie or one
Speaker 1: of her many pods asked. You might know her from
Speaker 1: her new Netflix movie The Wrong Missy. Ladies and gentlemen,
Speaker 1: Lauren Love Laura, thank you so much for coming on
Speaker 1: the pod. IM so honored, and thank you for being
Speaker 1: my first guest. And I'm so excited. It's gonna be
Speaker 1: so great. We came up with this in New York City.
Speaker 1: We were on a trip. We were on a little
Speaker 1: trip just for fun, which is so rare. I don't
Speaker 1: think I had actually taken a real vacation. Well that's
Speaker 1: not true. The first real vacation I took was this
Speaker 1: summer to Rhode Island with you and your husband and Debbie,
Speaker 1: Ryan and Brian Sofie, and that was a real joy.
Speaker 1: And then we're like, oh my god, let's get really
Speaker 1: crazy and let's go to New York for a week.
Speaker 1: It was so great. It was like one of the
Speaker 1: best trips ever, and I think it might be the
Speaker 1: best friend trip I've ever had. It was so and
Speaker 1: I was like, it was easy. It was so easy,
Speaker 1: and we were on the same we had the same
Speaker 1: desires throughout the day. Now I'm hungry, let's go it
Speaker 1: down and let's cancel that. Let's do that. It was
Speaker 1: very easy, and I never felt like you were letting
Speaker 1: the other person down by wanting to change it. You know,
Speaker 1: some people can be like I thought we were going
Speaker 1: to do that. It's like, I don't care. I could
Speaker 1: not be happier. One of my favorite things in the
Speaker 1: world is to make a plan and then I have
Speaker 1: somebody canceled like an hour before, and people keep apologizing,
Speaker 1: but they don't realize that the person inside of me
Speaker 1: that is a little socially anxious that I am so
Speaker 1: proud of myself that I made the plan and I
Speaker 1: could not be happier that I don't have to do it.
Speaker 1: I did it recently when I was going to go
Speaker 1: to dinner with a friend that I really like and
Speaker 1: it's like always a fun time, but I was like,
Speaker 1: I just don't feel like going out tonight, and it
Speaker 1: was like four hours before dinner and I was just, yes,
Speaker 1: I don't have to yes see each other again. I'm
Speaker 1: just going to cancel. And then I did feel a
Speaker 1: little bad because I have I don't know what her
Speaker 1: stances on that kind of thing, but I felt so
Speaker 1: relieved for myself. I was like, like, oh wow, why
Speaker 1: do I ever make any plans? This is I should
Speaker 1: just never make plan. No. I have been in a
Speaker 1: real Boo Radley mode, right, I have been real into
Speaker 1: our cat mode lately. But um, I do know I
Speaker 1: need I forced myself well. Actually talked about that a
Speaker 1: lot in my book. I do talk a lot about
Speaker 1: so um, just a little preview. I I feel my
Speaker 1: parents married on a dare. They weren't dating, and they
Speaker 1: moved from man dared them. They dared each other. I
Speaker 1: know it's they were co workers and they got two
Speaker 1: weeks of vacation a year, and then if you went
Speaker 1: on a honeymoon, you got like an extra two weeks.
Speaker 1: So they were like trying to come up and think
Speaker 1: way to beat the man. And then so my dad
Speaker 1: was like, I think they were like having cocktails or
Speaker 1: in New York City, you know, it's like New Year's Eve.
Speaker 1: And my dad was like, if we get married, we'll
Speaker 1: go down to South America for a month, Like I'll
Speaker 1: pay for the vacation. We can come back and we
Speaker 1: can get it annulled. And then my mom called the
Speaker 1: next day and she upped the auntie and she was like,
Speaker 1: I'll do it, but I'm getting it annulled. And so
Speaker 1: she borrowed her best It's nice. So that's how the
Speaker 1: book starts. And she borrowed her best friend Arden's wedding dress.
Speaker 1: They never told my grandparents. And then they actually got married.
Speaker 1: So then they moved this tiny town called Little Compton,
Speaker 1: Rhode Island. It has like three thousand people. You've been there,
Speaker 1: I have I feel very special because I guess not
Speaker 1: that many people have. No. It's the tinest town ever.
Speaker 1: And uh but I I feel like it was a
Speaker 1: really fun house. But it was there's a side of
Speaker 1: me that because it was sort of a lawless way
Speaker 1: that they got married. There was we you know, my
Speaker 1: brother and I are both insomniacs. It was sort of
Speaker 1: this lawless house and so we're trying to figure out
Speaker 1: how normal people exist. I I put I make planned
Speaker 1: just because I think I'm like other people do, but
Speaker 1: it's not my natural inday. Yeah, you know, I think
Speaker 1: you're right. I think I relate to that too, that
Speaker 1: like I feel like I'm supposed to because I was like, oh,
Speaker 1: when you're like an adult, you go to drinks with
Speaker 1: people and have dinner with people, and I think, I
Speaker 1: I don't care about that. And I think if I
Speaker 1: think of having this realization right now where I'm I, oh,
Speaker 1: I think I don't care, like I think I every
Speaker 1: time I'm getting close to a dinner plan, except for
Speaker 1: I will say we have a dinner plan that is
Speaker 1: like every month with me and Brian Sofie, and we
Speaker 1: have the best time. But that's when I never that's
Speaker 1: our allum, that's our illuminati. But even when I only
Speaker 1: make plans of people I like, So it's not even
Speaker 1: like I don't like anyones. It's that I just don't
Speaker 1: want to. I would rather literally just both sit on
Speaker 1: the couch and do nothing, or like go shopping or
Speaker 1: do something. Can I tell you how much like I
Speaker 1: have to say, this podcast has made me feel better
Speaker 1: in general because I feel like I can chat with
Speaker 1: people and relate and have people to my house and
Speaker 1: stuff like that. But it also makes me feel better
Speaker 1: to hear because I think of you as a very
Speaker 1: well adjusted person, and you here you appear like you
Speaker 1: would want It makes me feel better. Do you force yourself? Oh? Yeah,
Speaker 1: well I think I fill my calendar because that's how
Speaker 1: I end up doing things, Like if I'm like, oh, well,
Speaker 1: I make a dinner plan, but I'll make it like
Speaker 1: three weeks away, and then I don't think about that later,
Speaker 1: and then three weeks always comes and all the things
Speaker 1: that you've said you were going to do there, and
Speaker 1: then I'm like, this week is really full because I
Speaker 1: just like jam packed it full of everything I have
Speaker 1: to do. So I'm also trying to be better about
Speaker 1: not doing that and just saying even if I like,
Speaker 1: let's say someone asked me to a podcast or something,
Speaker 1: but it's like I'm doing something later that day, I'll
Speaker 1: say that day doesn't work, I'll pick a different day
Speaker 1: because I'm like, then I'm gonna be going from thing
Speaker 1: to thing to thing the whole day and then I
Speaker 1: have to go to dinner with somebody that I made
Speaker 1: a plan with. And you know, also, I wanted to
Speaker 1: be known if anyone ever wants to cancel on me,
Speaker 1: you were more than oh my god, I'm jealous that
Speaker 1: I'm jealous of the friend that you canceled on her.
Speaker 1: I know we're getting dinner in like a week now,
Speaker 1: because then I was like, it would be, it would
Speaker 1: be done. But then I'm like, I like her and
Speaker 1: this is fine. So it's not really about checking it
Speaker 1: off the list, about wanting to enjoy myself, so I
Speaker 1: should do it on a day where I feel like it.
Speaker 1: Um let me wre you girl. Okay, how did your
Speaker 1: parents meet? They met? Um, they were neighbors in an
Speaker 1: apartment building in Chicago. And there's a story with it
Speaker 1: that basically my mom pretended to get locked out of
Speaker 1: her apartment and that she had to climb through his
Speaker 1: balcony or something to get to hers. But it was
Speaker 1: it was not real, like she was pretending attention. Yeah,
Speaker 1: and he just didn't care, Like he let her in
Speaker 1: and like let her go do it, and like it
Speaker 1: just didn't register as like anything. That's amazing. Yeah. I
Speaker 1: don't really know what happened after that, like how they
Speaker 1: started dating, but that was the first thing. My mom
Speaker 1: noticed him and was like, oh, I like him. But
Speaker 1: and you have a brother, Yeah? Is he older? Yeah,
Speaker 1: he's three years older, so it's mine. And um, were
Speaker 1: you were you popular in school? Like, how was middle
Speaker 1: school for you? You've seen my middle school photo? Yeah,
Speaker 1: I don't know. I should show you some of mine.
Speaker 1: I don't know if I have any readily available. But
Speaker 1: I was not popular, but I wasn't like a total
Speaker 1: sad sack. I feel like I fell into a comfortable
Speaker 1: range where like I could talk to popular kids and
Speaker 1: sometimes I was friends with them, but not to the
Speaker 1: point where I would go hang out with them like
Speaker 1: after school, but in the moment, I could like talk
Speaker 1: to them at lunch and sometimes sit with them. But
Speaker 1: I had my group of friends as well, and so
Speaker 1: we kind of were a middle group. Yeah. Yeah, were
Speaker 1: you a class like were you sort of the entertainer
Speaker 1: like people I hate the phrase class clients. I wasn't
Speaker 1: a class clown, but I hate that to Really, it
Speaker 1: was like I just talked, and so I felt free
Speaker 1: to and confident to just talk whenever I wanted a class,
Speaker 1: and a lot of times it would be just something
Speaker 1: funny that I wanted to say. Um, but it wasn't
Speaker 1: usually to distract. It was mostly that I just thought
Speaker 1: of something funny about what we were talking about or
Speaker 1: something like. I just had like a sarcastic comment or
Speaker 1: something for everything, and a lot of my teachers, um,
Speaker 1: like I didn't. I never got in trouble for it.
Speaker 1: They always seemed to like it, or at least be like,
Speaker 1: it doesn't matter. First kiss who. I was a junior
Speaker 1: in high school, okay, and it got really built up
Speaker 1: in my head for that reason because it was like
Speaker 1: everyone it was me and another friend had not done it.
Speaker 1: So we kind of were like looking to each other
Speaker 1: like hell, oh my god, everybody in my class was boning.
Speaker 1: Oh my god, I think they all were. Everybody. I
Speaker 1: just was like just I wanted to, but I didn't
Speaker 1: understand how you got there, and like it just was
Speaker 1: such a far off idea. That's how I felt honestly
Speaker 1: most of my life, Like I think now with Tinder
Speaker 1: and stuff, like, it's so much easier. I know people
Speaker 1: think that females like, oh you could. I really could
Speaker 1: not in envision in scenario where I would be like
Speaker 1: with my clothes off at the end of the night
Speaker 1: with somebody, even like my twenties, like oh yeah, it's
Speaker 1: hard to be, like, how do you get that? I
Speaker 1: couldn't figure out how what would happen during the day
Speaker 1: that would lead me to meeting somebody, meeting a person
Speaker 1: and just hooking up with them. I don't figured out
Speaker 1: couldn't figure out how you would go on dates, like
Speaker 1: I couldn't figure out how to get a boy friend.
Speaker 1: I think I lack the necessary um trust in everyone
Speaker 1: to be willing to just have a one night stand
Speaker 1: with a stranger I've never met, Like God, But then
Speaker 1: these people must be like thinking everyone is ultimately fine
Speaker 1: or that nothing bad will happen to them, Like, I
Speaker 1: don't know how you're getting yourself in that situation without
Speaker 1: my My first impression has to be like incredible of
Speaker 1: somebody if I'm going to talk to them for longer
Speaker 1: than five minutes. Of someone, I'm just meeting I truly mean,
Speaker 1: I mean, I know lots of people hook up all
Speaker 1: the time, like and I would we probably alien And
Speaker 1: I envy that I had such anxiety and fear of
Speaker 1: diseases just for me too. I fear diseases more than
Speaker 1: I was, Like I I was the makeup bandit for
Speaker 1: a while, like in my twenties. But it was just
Speaker 1: I was fully convinced there was there was no way
Speaker 1: that I was not going to get some terrible disease.
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, I mean I was. I wouldn't even kiss
Speaker 1: people if I didn't really like them, And then if
Speaker 1: I really like to them and I kissed them, I
Speaker 1: probably get over them right away. Like it was like
Speaker 1: people would get so mad at me, and I have
Speaker 1: to say, if if I wasn't me, I would and
Speaker 1: I was on the receiving end, I would also think
Speaker 1: you're a garbage person. Yeah, it's annoying. Okay, So who
Speaker 1: was the first kiss? Junior high? Um? This guy that
Speaker 1: I went to school with, um and he was we
Speaker 1: were in the theater department together and he was a
Speaker 1: senior and I was a junior and I still know him.
Speaker 1: So it's like weird because I'm not going to name him,
Speaker 1: but I didn't name him on another podcast, I think.
Speaker 1: And then, um, everyone in my high school was like
Speaker 1: texting me about it because it apparently somebody somebody spotted mine.
Speaker 1: Mine was eighth grade. Oh that's good, that's like, that's
Speaker 1: a good one. Ninth grade, ninth grade. I was late
Speaker 1: ninth grade, ninth grade. But I was young from my class.
Speaker 1: I was probably I was old. I was seventeen, God
Speaker 1: bless you, that's how old I was when I lost
Speaker 1: my virginity. And I was late. Wow. But I was
Speaker 1: also too young for my class. So it was like
Speaker 1: right before high school graduation. And I figured in my
Speaker 1: brain the side of me that was afraid of diseases.
Speaker 1: That was like, I can do it with one of
Speaker 1: these high school guys because I know where they've been
Speaker 1: once I get out of here, the pools too. I
Speaker 1: just got to get it done with one of these
Speaker 1: dumb dumbs. And I did. Ye. Thank you so much.
Speaker 1: Have you ever heard from that person again or seeing
Speaker 1: them again. I liked him so much more than he
Speaker 1: liked me, and um, and he it was terrible. He
Speaker 1: slept with another girl the next day, like my friend. Yeah,
Speaker 1: And then at a reunion, He like tried to hit
Speaker 1: on me, and I remember being so excited to kind
Speaker 1: of be like, you know, we were supposed to go
Speaker 1: on another date. I dated him for a while and
Speaker 1: then we went on like he was supposed to go
Speaker 1: on a date with me, and he didn't call me
Speaker 1: in time. I was like, I'm unavailable anymore, and I
Speaker 1: was like, yes, you know, just that sort of wonderful
Speaker 1: final revenge. Oh, bone zone, time for the bone zone.
Speaker 1: M So what one of the things I talked about
Speaker 1: in the book I keep edging closer. Um, I feel
Speaker 1: like some of this stuff growing up in my house
Speaker 1: felt I mean, I guess I would imagine most people
Speaker 1: feel like this. I mean, I think honestly like living
Speaker 1: life and adulthood is sort of like there's part of
Speaker 1: it is people tell you things, and then part of
Speaker 1: it is to choose your own adventure of like you
Speaker 1: have to figure it out on your own. But there
Speaker 1: are so many things that I feel like I know
Speaker 1: now that I wish I knew it, like one or
Speaker 1: twenty two creatively, or like what if you could go
Speaker 1: back in time and tell young Lauren Law because if
Speaker 1: you think, what would you tell her? Well, Yeah, I
Speaker 1: do think you have such a good point that so
Speaker 1: much of it is like you have to figure it
Speaker 1: out yourself, just with life and with career stuff. I think,
Speaker 1: especially in entertainment industry, like nobody is explaining things to you,
Speaker 1: and there are so many mistakes you kind of have
Speaker 1: to make. I guess even if someone told you probably
Speaker 1: still make the same mistakes. So like, like I mean,
Speaker 1: I think with like auditioning or things like that, like
Speaker 1: where it's you have to Like when I think back
Speaker 1: to myself when I was first auditioning, I think I
Speaker 1: put so much pressure on myself and would freak out
Speaker 1: over like things that ultimately never got made. You know.
Speaker 1: It's like the stakes were so low for the audition,
Speaker 1: especially the things I was getting auditions for when I
Speaker 1: was like especially in Chicago or new when I was
Speaker 1: young and just starting. But I would tell myself not
Speaker 1: to worry about it so much and then it's not
Speaker 1: going to matter, and that it'll all be fine and
Speaker 1: this is all experience and like every time you go
Speaker 1: you'll learn, you learn something about yourself and like how
Speaker 1: to handle it. But I don't think I could have
Speaker 1: understood it because I had to go through all these
Speaker 1: awkward moments and just suck a bunch and then realized
Speaker 1: that that's what it was like. It takes a while
Speaker 1: to realize how many days of people they're auditioning, because
Speaker 1: you think it's just like you versus the late and
Speaker 1: you're like, no, they've been seeing people like all of March.
Speaker 1: You know, like you're one of fifty that I looked
Speaker 1: at and the competition is really against yourself. How do
Speaker 1: you prepare for an audition? UM, I will print out
Speaker 1: the sides, which is like the audition scene material and
Speaker 1: for people out there who don't know and like I
Speaker 1: might not explain it to you, what is that? Wait?
Speaker 1: What is that? I don't know what that is. I
Speaker 1: don't know that. I don't know what that is. How
Speaker 1: did I get into this building? I don't know what
Speaker 1: is happening. But I'll print it out and then like
Speaker 1: depending on how much time I have, a lot of
Speaker 1: times auditions will be like it's tomorrow, I cancel everything.
Speaker 1: You have to be there. And I've been trying to
Speaker 1: fight back against that because I realized that there's always
Speaker 1: more days and like you said, they're always auditioning people forever,
Speaker 1: and like they can see me next week. Yeah, it's fine,
Speaker 1: and I'd be better if I got to read this
Speaker 1: more than once. So I'll print it out and then
Speaker 1: I'll kind of leave it around my house and then
Speaker 1: like you know, glance at it a little bit every day,
Speaker 1: and then the day of the thing, I'll like focus
Speaker 1: for like an hour and a half on it and
Speaker 1: I'll drive there and then sit in my car for
Speaker 1: like ten minutes reading it over and over, just just
Speaker 1: reading it without looking I mean, what looking at the page,
Speaker 1: not trying to pretend I know it. Yeah, So I
Speaker 1: have it because I think part of my thing is
Speaker 1: anym a visual learner, where I can see the words
Speaker 1: in my head. If i'm if I have to think
Speaker 1: of my next line, I can kind of see it.
Speaker 1: So if I read it a lot before I go in,
Speaker 1: it's kind of in my head more. I love that.
Speaker 1: But yeah, it's a very um possibly lazy process. Sometimes
Speaker 1: I hear about people who get like acting coaches for auditions,
Speaker 1: and I'm like, oh, I guess I never thought of that,
Speaker 1: Like I like, but but it's working for you. It's fine,
Speaker 1: it's fine, But I think that there are people where
Speaker 1: like they do that, and it's really great for them,
Speaker 1: So I don't know. I hire somebody just to help
Speaker 1: to run it, just to help you learn it. Also,
Speaker 1: my eyes I've gotten worse, so like it's hard for
Speaker 1: me and I don't have the kind of eyes that
Speaker 1: can wear contacts, and like see, I can't. It's either
Speaker 1: it's one or the other. I can either see the
Speaker 1: person I'm reading against or I can see the words
Speaker 1: on the page, and so I try to memorize it.
Speaker 1: Then I have to because I literally can't look and
Speaker 1: see it. I can't. That's better, though. Do you ever
Speaker 1: have moments where you forget? Yeah, it's gotten. I mean
Speaker 1: I have to say this new. Not being able to
Speaker 1: see a thing has been as a real drag. I
Speaker 1: get it. I I usually get in my tub and
Speaker 1: I will just say it out loud like ten times.
Speaker 1: Like for me, it's just it's just to repeat it.
Speaker 1: And then I try to run it with somebody else.
Speaker 1: I mean I run it with Mike too, so like
Speaker 1: we'll like sit there and do it. But that can
Speaker 1: be risky when you do it with your partner, Like
Speaker 1: I think if you have an outside person that you're
Speaker 1: talking to help because he and I will kind of
Speaker 1: get annoyed with each other and we do the same
Speaker 1: thing to each other that we both don't like, Like
Speaker 1: we'll start correcting the line that you're saying, like it's
Speaker 1: actually this, and I was actually saying something very similar
Speaker 1: to that. I'm just trying to prove that I can
Speaker 1: kind of get through this. Like it's not a memorizing contest.
Speaker 1: It's not like they I think they figure out at
Speaker 1: some point if I say lamb, I can also say sheep,
Speaker 1: you know, like if they get I'm not gonna lose
Speaker 1: the part if I get that word row. But I
Speaker 1: used to feel like if I messed up that part,
Speaker 1: then I like then that was it for me. Like
Speaker 1: it's a fine line of yeah. But thinking also about
Speaker 1: your question, it's like when I was younger, before getting
Speaker 1: to do anything like that, I think one of the
Speaker 1: things I would have told myself, or I wish I
Speaker 1: could tell myself, is that you don't need to be
Speaker 1: in a relationship. But I think that part of my
Speaker 1: desire my entire life to have a boyfriend or whatever
Speaker 1: like made it so that when I was finally getting
Speaker 1: attention for people that I liked, it was really hard
Speaker 1: to not want to give into that like, oh, this
Speaker 1: is great, I got what I wanted. How old were
Speaker 1: you and where were you when you started getting attention? Um,
Speaker 1: I think from I think probably like nineteen, like right
Speaker 1: when I was in college and doing improv, and I
Speaker 1: didn't get mail attention until Chicago at nineteen, and it
Speaker 1: was like the first time in my life. And I
Speaker 1: don't know if this is the same. I would imagine
Speaker 1: it's similar where I felt like starting to do improv
Speaker 1: Olympic in Chicago and and being a teenager. But they
Speaker 1: were all like so talented and slightly older, but all
Speaker 1: of a sudden you feel like you found your people,
Speaker 1: and then all of us like I didn't make sense,
Speaker 1: like as a lady, I went to the wrong college.
Speaker 1: I went to college in Colorado just like yeah, like
Speaker 1: and like male witches. There was a guy. There was
Speaker 1: a male witch and he had like all these ferrets
Speaker 1: and stuff, and I didn't make sense as a lady there.
Speaker 1: But then all of this when I did a semester
Speaker 1: in Chicago, which is where it sort of started for
Speaker 1: me and I it was the first time I got
Speaker 1: male attention, and I felt like the lights came on
Speaker 1: both as a person of like seeing inspiring like what
Speaker 1: you could do and creatively and seeing so many talented people,
Speaker 1: like right before they went to Second City and right
Speaker 1: before they got Yeah, the people that you were around
Speaker 1: that time are some of the household names now. Like
Speaker 1: it's not like because people were just some I mean
Speaker 1: some of them were like shlubby, weird guys, but like
Speaker 1: a lot of them were extremely talented people who was
Speaker 1: there when you were there? Oh god, I mean there
Speaker 1: were so many great people. I'd have to let's see. Um.
Speaker 1: I mean, they're not all men that I had interest
Speaker 1: in or anything. But I could just name random people
Speaker 1: that were there. But Vanessa Bear and I want an
Speaker 1: improp team together. Um, Paul Branton who went on too
Speaker 1: S and L and um. Everyone says Vanessa's lovely. She is,
Speaker 1: She's so great, She's really nice. Um. Well, a lot
Speaker 1: of them like our writers and stuff now. But I
Speaker 1: mean I could name people and go on, but they're
Speaker 1: like people who are just so funny and so pat
Speaker 1: O Bran, Well, Michael brand is his name now? He
Speaker 1: was on he created a p bio and he changed
Speaker 1: his name. Wait his first name why, I don't know.
Speaker 1: I think his name he might have been going by
Speaker 1: his middle name at that time, and maybe there's another
Speaker 1: So you so you started getting male attention and then
Speaker 1: you hooked you well, And I had a boyfriend from
Speaker 1: high school that I was with into college and like
Speaker 1: that probably ran its course before I was aware, But
Speaker 1: then I was also like I liked the familiarity of
Speaker 1: the of having a relationship with the constant and like
Speaker 1: knowing that or something. Um but really like, yeah, there's
Speaker 1: just I just look back and think, like, oh, I
Speaker 1: was probably like too. I don't know what I was
Speaker 1: worried about, but I would have given myself the freedom
Speaker 1: to just be alone for more of that because I
Speaker 1: think I always had a boyfriend throughout that time. It's
Speaker 1: so interesting just again, look when I look back on stuff,
Speaker 1: and I try to look back with compassion, but it's
Speaker 1: like you're navigate. It's it's like these are this is
Speaker 1: the gas that's in your tank. This is like the
Speaker 1: road map you were given and just sort of trying
Speaker 1: to navigate that that particularly that age I feel like
Speaker 1: eighteen to like twenty four. It's whether you go to
Speaker 1: college or not. You know, but you're starting to it's
Speaker 1: not quite the same routine. That's it's starting it's getting
Speaker 1: becoming an adult. Yeah, And I think when I think
Speaker 1: of myself at that age, I was such a kid,
Speaker 1: Like I'm imagining myself in college, like and how I was,
Speaker 1: and I'm like, I was a kid. I didn't know anything.
Speaker 1: I felt really confident within the comedy community and like
Speaker 1: that gave me so much, but then outside of that,
Speaker 1: I didn't really know where I fit in. So at school,
Speaker 1: I feel like I didn't bond with people very much
Speaker 1: because I was kind of seeing it as two different worlds,
Speaker 1: or like I go to school just to get a
Speaker 1: degree and I go out here to be myself and
Speaker 1: have my life. Yeah, just the idea that I would
Speaker 1: I went to school like I saw it as two
Speaker 1: different worlds, where like I was going to school to
Speaker 1: get a degree and that was the focus of that time.
Speaker 1: And then when I was not in school, I was
Speaker 1: performing and that's where I was really myself and where
Speaker 1: I really made friends who really understood me. I didn't
Speaker 1: really feel like I could find that at school and
Speaker 1: have that as well, even though I'm sure there were
Speaker 1: a lot of people who were like me. Um, but
Speaker 1: it just felt like I couldn't. Did you do like
Speaker 1: classes and perform on the weekends. I performed almost every
Speaker 1: night of the week, like I was like doing it
Speaker 1: and the playground and like a random like second Skybox shows.
Speaker 1: Chicago is so great. It's the best. But I mean,
Speaker 1: I think that maybe was doing myself a disservice in
Speaker 1: the sense that I felt really socially anxious whenever I
Speaker 1: was outside of that realm, like I was like putting
Speaker 1: all my eggs in that basket socially. And then kind
Speaker 1: of in my college experience, I was like nervous to
Speaker 1: talk to people my own age. That's how I mean, truly,
Speaker 1: I I got into other schools to transfer, but I
Speaker 1: couldn't afford to go. So but I was, you know,
Speaker 1: doing Chicago, and then I went worked at Conan. It
Speaker 1: was I kept getting on these kept figuring out ways
Speaker 1: to get credit and kind of living the beginning of
Speaker 1: my professional and like real life. And then so there
Speaker 1: was lots of lovely people at my school, like I
Speaker 1: you know, I graduated on time, but there was something
Speaker 1: it was sort of like, oh, now I have to
Speaker 1: go do this, like you know, like I just wanted
Speaker 1: to get going, I know, and I wonder if I'm
Speaker 1: still doing some of that, Like now that I'm hearing
Speaker 1: it and even hearing you relate to it, I'm like, oh,
Speaker 1: do I still sometimes compartmentalized in that way or like, um,
Speaker 1: not not allow for connection in certain ways, Like I
Speaker 1: think when I was first getting acting roles, I was
Speaker 1: really anxious about chatting with other people. Like the idea
Speaker 1: of eating lunch the work day was like really stressful
Speaker 1: to me, to the point where I'd be like, oh no,
Speaker 1: that's one of my first thoughts about getting a job,
Speaker 1: But now I have to figure out lunch. I literally
Speaker 1: in the book, I wrote a chapter you know you've
Speaker 1: been to my I grew up in next to like
Speaker 1: a field that has a like a a to to
Speaker 1: train like a caboose filled with chicken. You know, there's
Speaker 1: no stoplights, there's a general store. And then and then
Speaker 1: at twenty two, like being like actually being on a
Speaker 1: sitcom and then doing episodes of shows that I grew
Speaker 1: up It was just my dreams, like and actually getting
Speaker 1: the thrill of booking a job in the last or
Speaker 1: about two seconds, and then the immediate terror of who
Speaker 1: am I going to have lent to it? Um having
Speaker 1: to talk to people act like a normal but One
Speaker 1: of the things that I've been giving myself the liberty
Speaker 1: of doing, which I don't know if this is good
Speaker 1: or bad, is that I'll just eat alone in my trail.
Speaker 1: I eat my trailer, and I think, I personally, I
Speaker 1: think I need this because I will be like my
Speaker 1: social battery is drained from just like chatting on set
Speaker 1: and all the other hours of the day. It's a
Speaker 1: twelve hour work day, I need to be alone for
Speaker 1: thirty minutes and that's okay. I've started also doing a
Speaker 1: thing because I get nervous. I've started doing things so
Speaker 1: that I don't have my baby blanket where I make
Speaker 1: myself leave my phone in my room so that I
Speaker 1: can't hide in it. And it forces me again because
Speaker 1: I get nervous around people. But once I get to
Speaker 1: know somebody one on one, and like once I take
Speaker 1: the even inviting you to New York, like taking the
Speaker 1: risk of like and we were already friends. But it's like, oh,
Speaker 1: there's five days, you know, like, um, you know the
Speaker 1: healthy risk, which is why then I can go eat
Speaker 1: alone on my trailer because I've been you know, but
Speaker 1: you've been pushing yourself in the other hours. But I
Speaker 1: forced myself to to leave it so that I I
Speaker 1: I am, I can just somehow try to find a
Speaker 1: calm within myself and not and not be disconnected, and
Speaker 1: so I have to talk to people or just be quiet.
Speaker 1: I mean, it would be nice if it was a
Speaker 1: rule that everyone had to problem because I think everyone's
Speaker 1: on the phone. Everyone's on their phone, but it's on
Speaker 1: the phone. I also try to bring a book because
Speaker 1: I just prefer for myself. I'm on my phone too much, Like, Okay,
Speaker 1: this is better for me. My brain just feels better
Speaker 1: from just looking at paper that like. But I think
Speaker 1: people can see that as socially cut off in a
Speaker 1: way where you're right now, she's just going to read
Speaker 1: right next to us, which is actually more open for
Speaker 1: conversation than being on your phone, because I have no
Speaker 1: idea what you're doing on there. I don't know how
Speaker 1: important it is. Oh no, I don't know if you're
Speaker 1: just scrolling. It's so terrifying when you see known who
Speaker 1: are who have you been the most intimidated, Like when
Speaker 1: you're like, oh my god, I'm so excited to book this,
Speaker 1: but now I have to actually go execute it, Like
Speaker 1: were you nervous to go fill the movie with John
Speaker 1: c Riley and Will Feral. Yes, I was, And I
Speaker 1: was nervous because I had we had like a few
Speaker 1: weeks of rehearsals and stuff. My character has no lines
Speaker 1: until the end, so I really felt like, oh, am
Speaker 1: I like a worthless part of this, Like do I
Speaker 1: need to be rehearsing this because they should? This is
Speaker 1: like they have a lot of lines. Yeah. Yeah, Um.
Speaker 1: So I was nervous that I was like a third
Speaker 1: wheel or something, you know, or fourth wheel, which but
Speaker 1: you know what I mean, but like they're like, oh,
Speaker 1: this is like unnecessary. Um, but but yeah, I think
Speaker 1: And I definitely felt that way because I was in
Speaker 1: London for like three and a half months doing that
Speaker 1: movie where I had to fill my own time. But
Speaker 1: I didn't want to bother anyone and like suggest that
Speaker 1: we get dinner. I would never like, even when it
Speaker 1: did happen a couple of times, but I'm like, I'm
Speaker 1: not going to be the one to suggest this. It's
Speaker 1: hard being a guest star to like going in when
Speaker 1: people have a set like the eight Year, basically you
Speaker 1: are the guest at somebody else's Thanksgiving and you were
Speaker 1: the cousin that got brought by the cousin that got
Speaker 1: brought by, like you are the plus twelve, like you're
Speaker 1: way out, and so like for like orange is the
Speaker 1: new black, that must be that's the same. That's rifle describing,
Speaker 1: because I mean I think it was like literally number
Speaker 1: like sixty something on the call sheet. There's so many people,
Speaker 1: and it was intimidating because I was coming into a
Speaker 1: world I basically really only done multicam stuff before that,
Speaker 1: and then flying to New York for it, and like
Speaker 1: sleeping on my friend's couch because it was local higher
Speaker 1: meaning you have to pay for your own way and
Speaker 1: they don't set you up at a hotel or anything.
Speaker 1: So he was sleeping on a couch, sleep in a couch,
Speaker 1: then going to work at five am. But all these
Speaker 1: people who seemed to know each other really well because
Speaker 1: they were all in New York together, and they were
Speaker 1: all in more episodes together than I was, spending more
Speaker 1: time together. That's hard. And everyone was really nice, but
Speaker 1: it was still the feeling of like just inside myself,
Speaker 1: Oh how do I That's hard? But I do think
Speaker 1: like going through like big life things has been helpful
Speaker 1: for me because I've been able to put things in
Speaker 1: the perspective more. And at that time of my life,
Speaker 1: I hadn't really had anything that hard happened to me,
Speaker 1: so it was like kind of hard to see it
Speaker 1: as not being a huge deal. But like I don't
Speaker 1: know what to say to those people. Are what am
Speaker 1: I going to talk about? Or what am I gonna
Speaker 1: Who'm I gonna sit with? Like I feel like now
Speaker 1: I'm more like, all right, everyone's got their own ship.
Speaker 1: I don't care. I have my problems that I have
Speaker 1: to deal with, and I've intentionally gotten and I honestly
Speaker 1: the large part of it has been doing the podcast.
Speaker 1: Like I've gotten I forced because I see that it
Speaker 1: makes me happy. So I've gotten a little bit. I've
Speaker 1: taken some healthier risk of getting a little more social.
Speaker 1: But I did notice that, like I did this horror
Speaker 1: movie like a year ago with Rebecca Romain and Jerry
Speaker 1: and they said that they were staying in a much
Speaker 1: fancier hotel. I was at some like crappy residence in
Speaker 1: and they kept like inviting me to meals, and apparently
Speaker 1: every time I'd be like just text them like no,
Speaker 1: I'm walking. I was always walking to trade or jealous
Speaker 1: just like the lone wand like not even in the car,
Speaker 1: like I'm walking like on like and it wasn't even
Speaker 1: like a pretty sidewalk. It was like a weird word
Speaker 1: roadway in Dallas. I'll be walking on like this weird.
Speaker 1: Not in those situations so often when you're shooting something
Speaker 1: in a weird place, I'll just walk to the movies
Speaker 1: and it's like two miles away. I thought I thought
Speaker 1: they were like so literally they forced me. They asked
Speaker 1: me like four times. I was always walking on a
Speaker 1: roadway to Trader Joe's. And then finally I was like okay,
Speaker 1: like because I get nervous, So I was like, it's
Speaker 1: the equivalent of hiding in my trailer. It's like, no,
Speaker 1: I'm just gonna I think they don't really want to
Speaker 1: invite me. Yeah, they don't. They feel like they have to,
Speaker 1: so event and then eventually, like so we did have
Speaker 1: a really good time and we had a lot of
Speaker 1: meals together. But it takes me a beat two. It
Speaker 1: takes me. It's like a healthy risk, and not all
Speaker 1: of them payoff. Have you had like weird I'm sure
Speaker 1: this happens to everybody in adulthood where you've moved away
Speaker 1: from home and you're trying to find your new friend
Speaker 1: group and you have like a girlfriend meal and that
Speaker 1: like you know, you didn't go anywhere, and like it's like, yeah,
Speaker 1: you've like shared way two intimate things. We only have
Speaker 1: had one and then like you never have another man
Speaker 1: and then you bump into them and you know that
Speaker 1: at one point in time you had like some weird
Speaker 1: like salad and somebody shared something terrible about their parents.
Speaker 1: Have you had that. I've had a bunch of those,
Speaker 1: but I kind of forget who they are, like, and
Speaker 1: then I'll remember, like randomly, like I ran into somebody
Speaker 1: recently and I always like seeing her and I was like,
Speaker 1: oh yeah, and then like whatever, I was said high
Speaker 1: for two seconds, and then I was in the car
Speaker 1: later and I was going, oh, yeah, we went to
Speaker 1: I tried to get lunch and what was that about?
Speaker 1: And why didn't that work out? And like I guess
Speaker 1: we didn't have the chemistry or something, But like, isn't
Speaker 1: that weird? It's I courted you, I asked, it's interesting
Speaker 1: when you have like a bodge friend meal in Los
Speaker 1: Angeles because sometimes like the bodge friend Meal, I had
Speaker 1: a couple of meals with somebody who then went on
Speaker 1: to become very famous and then like I think I
Speaker 1: think maybe she would acknowledge if she knew me now,
Speaker 1: but I think she just because she just like outstratosphered me,
Speaker 1: like she ran up to you know, she's probably goes
Speaker 1: to like the met Galan. Now. I don't know if
Speaker 1: I if I have anything like that. We're like, I
Speaker 1: don't know if I know somebody who became mega famous,
Speaker 1: unless it's like some comedy dude, I don't care or something,
Speaker 1: but not like somebody like that where I would be like, dude,
Speaker 1: I don't remember me exactly. Do you know who I am? Mr? Up?
Speaker 1: Do you remember me? We had that good time together.
Speaker 1: But I think I have a bit of am Like
Speaker 1: my brain will block out things that are uncomfortable, so
Speaker 1: I'll just go like I kind of forget that I
Speaker 1: had that encounter with your person, and then I'll like
Speaker 1: it'll just pop in my head and I'll think, what
Speaker 1: do they think of that today? They forget or what
Speaker 1: I know? There's one, Yeah, there's one that was like
Speaker 1: very open, and I almost think it's not even on
Speaker 1: purpose because it's like so hard as an adult to
Speaker 1: kind of reach out. But then it's like for time
Speaker 1: number two, it's like who's going to set up the second? Yes,
Speaker 1: I don't know, But then I wonder what are we doing?
Speaker 1: Like this is part of the time about why are
Speaker 1: we Why are we making dinners? Why are we blowing out?
Speaker 1: We all just want to be watching? So what is
Speaker 1: the idea? Because we also all plenty we have plenty
Speaker 1: of people to talk to her hang out with them.
Speaker 1: What do we do? What do we do? So when
Speaker 1: you set up a new date, what are you doing
Speaker 1: with that? What's the intention? So are you planning to
Speaker 1: now become friends where you see each other all the time?
Speaker 1: It's kind of hard just to get together with people
Speaker 1: you already That's how I feel. So I'm doing one
Speaker 1: of these, Um, so what are you doing? Going on?
Speaker 1: I'm gonna have a double date Okay, And I'm actually
Speaker 1: I think it'll be fun and I'm looking forward to
Speaker 1: I don't know the people, um but I'm looking forward
Speaker 1: to it. But I also go, wait, do they really
Speaker 1: want to do? Like do we all want to do? It?
Speaker 1: Left to your own devices? Like just garbage planet, just
Speaker 1: left your own garbage devices, dream world. If you could
Speaker 1: get paid to have your own garbage existence? What would
Speaker 1: you do all day? Oh? Wow? And like, okay, you know,
Speaker 1: I think I would actually like to have a healthy
Speaker 1: existence if someone's going to pay me for my life,
Speaker 1: which I should think of that as being what my
Speaker 1: life is anywhere, but um, I would like to be
Speaker 1: I would have like a trainer, I have a chef
Speaker 1: who makes all my meals, and then I would just
Speaker 1: have people over to like smoke weed and watch movies
Speaker 1: or go like, you know, sit outside under the stars
Speaker 1: kind of thing I don't really need to be doing,
Speaker 1: like meet new friends dinner at a restaurant. Can you
Speaker 1: find them? Do you remember what they even looked like.
Speaker 1: I'm so glad that I got in with you two
Speaker 1: years ago before your friend wouldn't because I don't want
Speaker 1: to be like a no new friends, no but open hearted.
Speaker 1: I just fe you are busy. The eagle is landed.
Speaker 1: I want you to speaking of busy. Since I've never
Speaker 1: ever watched The Real Housewives, and since New York I've
Speaker 1: chose New York, I've started with New York. I'm eleven
Speaker 1: episodes into season eleven of New York. I am obsessed
Speaker 1: with lou Anne. Yeah, I love lu Anne. I love Luanne.
Speaker 1: She's still doing her cabaret. She is absolutely she comes
Speaker 1: to l A sometimes we gotta go see the cabaret.
Speaker 1: I love And even though I made fun of the cabaret,
Speaker 1: I loved it. I was you have to have you
Speaker 1: were so great on that show, Thank you, but it
Speaker 1: was it was I felt bad about making fun of
Speaker 1: I love lu Anne. I and I remember when Bethanny
Speaker 1: and she was retiring. Both Brian Sofie and my brother
Speaker 1: who is not the guy, they both explained to me
Speaker 1: that she's the greatest housewife, that it's actually a huge
Speaker 1: travesty that she's retiring. I have to say. And I
Speaker 1: know I'm catching her in her twilight hours of She's spectacular. Yeah,
Speaker 1: she's I get it. Possibly psychopath. She intimidates me, she
Speaker 1: scares me, she scares me. Um is Dorinda dum dum
Speaker 1: Dorinda's um. My perception of Direnda's that possibly she. I'm
Speaker 1: sorry I love Direnda because she might be an alcoholic
Speaker 1: cood for the problem I love. I'm so I don't
Speaker 1: I think indos spectacory. No. Well, sometimes yesterday I was
Speaker 1: dressed a certain way and I was like Oh my god,
Speaker 1: I think I'm turning into There's I had on like
Speaker 1: a cut of a dress and I was like, I
Speaker 1: was it had a slate and I had like a
Speaker 1: was sort of it was almost like a fit and flair,
Speaker 1: you know, and I and I had like a bow
Speaker 1: in my hair, and I was like, I'm one step
Speaker 1: I'm one step too poor to be Tinsley Mortimer. No,
Speaker 1: you know what I was asking, is it dum dumb? Yeah. Yeah,
Speaker 1: she's an airhead, but she's a lovable airhead. But she
Speaker 1: also made to have a drinking problem. When I look
Speaker 1: at these women, for how much they drink, I would
Speaker 1: waste seven hundred pounds. Oh wow, it would be a
Speaker 1: huge problem in my life if I drink anywhere near
Speaker 1: the amount that any of these people drink. It is.
Speaker 1: It is alarming because I also just think, wow, when
Speaker 1: I'm like, I don't know, in my fifties, would I
Speaker 1: want to be getting trashed with my friends to the
Speaker 1: point where we're like making out like it just they
Speaker 1: keep making out and then and oh see they were
Speaker 1: making out a time. Sonia is so hot for Bethany Yeah,
Speaker 1: and um on o c if you start watching Tamarra
Speaker 1: and Bronwyn like made out like a ton of this
Speaker 1: last episode, like they are going to have sex. So
Speaker 1: this is not a joke. I have to be I
Speaker 1: I never watched it. I love that there's no men,
Speaker 1: that they're all loaded. They and they're just sort of
Speaker 1: good sports. They just dive in and they put on
Speaker 1: their one piece base. They think they know they look great,
Speaker 1: They're ready. Yeah there. I kind of love when they
Speaker 1: get the fact that they get trash helps them to
Speaker 1: just like go with It's a lot of booze that
Speaker 1: because I first, again, I've never seen any episode, so
Speaker 1: whenever I've walked, certainly I've been places where it's on
Speaker 1: and I was like, oh, that feels really fake. All
Speaker 1: I can say is that my only knowledge is the
Speaker 1: New York one. I'm like, oh no, these ladies have
Speaker 1: been this is a decade long. They're all famous now.
Speaker 1: There's so much alcohol. This is simmering decades of resentment
Speaker 1: and I and friendship. I love it. There's a dog
Speaker 1: on this glass as his dog. He's in an outfit.
Speaker 1: It's his birthday. It's just he's one today. It's his birthday.
Speaker 1: He's in an outfit. Is his outfit he's in an out. Sorry,
Speaker 1: you don't even understand what I'm saying. Exciting, look at
Speaker 1: that Look at that picture. Look at that picture. That
Speaker 1: was really alarming. I didn't know there was a room
Speaker 1: up there. I want to ask you one thing. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I feel like you have really good self confidence and
Speaker 1: you don't doubt your create your voice and your creativity.
Speaker 1: And I feel like more and more you're leaning into
Speaker 1: this is what I want to do, This is what
Speaker 1: I like to do. Like, how what advice would you
Speaker 1: give to younger Lauren? Did you always have that? Did
Speaker 1: you ever doubt your own voice? Where did that come from?
Speaker 1: Definitely doubted it and I still doubt it sometimes. But
Speaker 1: I feel like what helps me is seeing other people
Speaker 1: going for it, because then I think, why should be
Speaker 1: going for it? Like, I mean, it's all subjective, so
Speaker 1: why should I not put my thing out into the world.
Speaker 1: But when I look back at myself, I was pretty
Speaker 1: blindly confident when I was younger, which was good, but
Speaker 1: I think I would have worked a little harder, um
Speaker 1: to make tangible things. I was like constantly doing improv
Speaker 1: but um that which was great because it built up
Speaker 1: my entire like comedic perspective, and I feel like I
Speaker 1: still lean on all of the stuff that I like,
Speaker 1: you know, honed in those years. But at the same time,
Speaker 1: it would have been cool if I had like pushed
Speaker 1: myself to write things or you know, just see what
Speaker 1: that would have been. I just didn't really know how
Speaker 1: to even begin. And I still feel kind of like, um,
Speaker 1: stuck with that stuff. But I know I can do it.
Speaker 1: It's just a matter of like sitting down. And that's
Speaker 1: also part of it. I feel I don't enough time
Speaker 1: in the day. I like, look at my day and
Speaker 1: I go the day is gone. I have to see
Speaker 1: I have to go have dinner and drinks. Now that's
Speaker 1: the kind of thing will drive me crazy where I'm
Speaker 1: gone all these days? Am I getting? Am I running
Speaker 1: on to dinner when I would we rather eat for
Speaker 1: two seconds at my table and then just work on
Speaker 1: something or like sit and think. I want to just
Speaker 1: be very honest as far as because I agree with
Speaker 1: you and this is the truth of like writing this
Speaker 1: book is the the I'm always been a sprinter, not
Speaker 1: a marathon person and has read it and has read
Speaker 1: the book. Um I have I if I can't get
Speaker 1: it done in a night, I'm not gonna do it,
Speaker 1: like and I will stay up all night and I'll
Speaker 1: do it, but like, you can't do that with a book.
Speaker 1: And and here's what I want to say to anybody
Speaker 1: out there that like just to dispel the myth. Literally
Speaker 1: some days it was writing, so I have to turn
Speaker 1: off internet and I will set a timer. And literally
Speaker 1: part of the book was just fifteen minutes a day.
Speaker 1: It was not four hours. The most I ever wrote
Speaker 1: ever was maybe maybe three hours, but that was the most.
Speaker 1: Most days it was like one hour. But if you
Speaker 1: actually sit down like assid in the seat and do
Speaker 1: twenty minutes thirty minutes, like I have such a d
Speaker 1: D and in fear particularly I've never written a book,
Speaker 1: you know, so just that it was, it was it's
Speaker 1: just facing calming down your own interfere and chatter, throwing
Speaker 1: up a bad version onto the page. So I picked
Speaker 1: I love Michael's Craft Stores, so I picked her. Like,
Speaker 1: I'm just going to Michael's and I'm getting the material
Speaker 1: and then I'm going to organize it afterwards, because sometimes
Speaker 1: things can become so huge in your head that it
Speaker 1: feels impossible to put it down. And even something like
Speaker 1: I was I'm trying to think about a thing that
Speaker 1: I want to do, and I was like, okay, why
Speaker 1: don't I start with making a list of what that involves?
Speaker 1: And then I did that and I was like, I
Speaker 1: don't not have a page of like a plan. Well,
Speaker 1: it's not like it's that complicated, but part of it
Speaker 1: is when it's just swirling in your head and you
Speaker 1: don't put anything down, it feels like it never moves forward.
Speaker 1: It's that next indicated action. I also get that for me,
Speaker 1: so I get I get big idea, but then I
Speaker 1: get overwhelmed me and and sometimes I'll have the enthusiasm
Speaker 1: but like something again, like a book or something else,
Speaker 1: but like for now, just referring to the book like
Speaker 1: it was, you can't sustain crazy enthusiasm for as long
Speaker 1: as it takes to there's gonna be some days where
Speaker 1: you don't freaking feel like. So for me, next indicated
Speaker 1: action is sort of I know my own brain and
Speaker 1: I did not write the first chapter first, like, so
Speaker 1: it's like, next first indicated action is like, let me
Speaker 1: just write down all the stories that I might want
Speaker 1: to tell, like just make a list, um, you know,
Speaker 1: and sort of organized it like after the proposal. After
Speaker 1: that I started, I did not write it in order,
Speaker 1: so it's like, what's the easiest chapter. So for me,
Speaker 1: it was also like what's the least personal chapter, Like
Speaker 1: what's like this the lowest hanging fruit that's sort of
Speaker 1: like a funny story that maybe I've told before, Like
Speaker 1: what's the easiest one to start with? And then I
Speaker 1: honestly at first just did word count. So it was like, Okay,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna just write a thousand words today, and and
Speaker 1: then going through phases you know that, but it's just
Speaker 1: like next indicated action was like writing another thousand words. Well, yeah,
Speaker 1: I think sometimes I really thrive with a deadline, which
Speaker 1: I sounds like you were too. Like in school, I
Speaker 1: would like stay up all night and I would, but
Speaker 1: I'd be like, I mean, wouldn't step on night. I
Speaker 1: would be like, I have to be done by midnights,
Speaker 1: and I would just like crank it out by midnight
Speaker 1: or never and then go to bed. But so I
Speaker 1: worked really well with like a finite amount of time.
Speaker 1: So when I have an idea and I'm like, well,
Speaker 1: I how it doesn't have to happen at any point,
Speaker 1: so what But I I like recently had to write
Speaker 1: an article for something and like, I did it in
Speaker 1: an afternoon because I knew they were expecting it. So
Speaker 1: part of it is that. But I get scared to
Speaker 1: tell other people the plan for them to give me
Speaker 1: the deadline. Oh, no, I know, I don't want to
Speaker 1: do that. No, I know, I know, I din't. I
Speaker 1: wouldn't want you to know that I didn't complete it,
Speaker 1: like I know, And even then I'm like, I know,
Speaker 1: I got to complete it for art, and you know,
Speaker 1: and then panic. I'm weirdly private about weird certain things
Speaker 1: because it's mostly it's mostly because I it's just my
Speaker 1: own fear that I can't execute this. Yeah, and I
Speaker 1: hate when I in the past, when I've talked about
Speaker 1: something a lot and then I don't do it. I'm like,
Speaker 1: everyone knows I wanted to do that thing and I didn't.
Speaker 1: I know, we were like, whatever happened? I just started Netflix.
Speaker 1: I discovered Netflix. Um, okay, Final Questions, Bachelor Bat You're
Speaker 1: at the Bachelor Mansion. You're getting out of the limo.
Speaker 1: What do you wear opening night? Oh my god? You
Speaker 1: know what if I really wanted to have a chance, Yeah,
Speaker 1: what do you wear? I'd wear what I would wear
Speaker 1: any day, like jeans and a T shirt. Okay, imagine
Speaker 1: showing up like nice hair and makeup and everything like
Speaker 1: I'd done, but not too much, just like what you
Speaker 1: would wear for like a nice love picture of yourself,
Speaker 1: nothing uncomfortable. And then I'd be able to be myself,
Speaker 1: because I think it was hobbling around in some fucking
Speaker 1: like tight dress with all these other women who would
Speaker 1: be insecure, and then I'd be like, funck you guys,
Speaker 1: I wore a sweatshirt and then I would look really cool.
Speaker 1: I love that. Okay, I'm gonna I'm gonna just leave
Speaker 1: with this, any any final words of wisdom for young
Speaker 1: Lauren out there. In my recent show with Wild Horses,
Speaker 1: my improv team, we were talking about kabbala names whatever,
Speaker 1: where it's like your big your your name of like
Speaker 1: what your thing is, and Stephanie Allen was saying that
Speaker 1: hers was big picture, and then we were kind of
Speaker 1: coming up with her own knife and mine. All I
Speaker 1: could think of was just do it. So I decided
Speaker 1: that I was Nike, the goddess of you know whatever,
Speaker 1: doing ship, and so that would be my thing to
Speaker 1: my younger self is just do it because I love
Speaker 1: that I had it within certain areas, but I didn't
Speaker 1: have it in every area. And I still feel that way,
Speaker 1: like I still feel like I need to keep telling
Speaker 1: myself my mantra, but I want to. I want to
Speaker 1: give that to my younger self or anyone out there
Speaker 1: who feels like I didn't have the direction yet. Just
Speaker 1: start doing stuff that you are interested in and just
Speaker 1: do it and don't think too hard about what it
Speaker 1: leads to, but think about how it feels to do it.
Speaker 1: I'm gonna piggyback on that because I agree with you,
Speaker 1: and I'm gonna just yes, and what you just said.
Speaker 1: I think it's okay to not tell everybody in your
Speaker 1: life because there's a lot of naysayers out there who
Speaker 1: they might be if they're stuck or whatever, and they
Speaker 1: don't necessarily realize they're doing it. They think they're protecting you,
Speaker 1: like I don't want you to get your hopes up,
Speaker 1: Like I hate that, Like let me get my hopes up.
Speaker 1: I'm an adult. I can handle being disappointed, you know,
Speaker 1: Like it's okay if it's like picture like a little
Speaker 1: baby chick, that it's okay to protect your little secret
Speaker 1: dream that you're working on. You don't need to hand
Speaker 1: it over to everybody, and while while it's growing. I
Speaker 1: like that. Just do it, okay. Final question from the
Speaker 1: Bachelor who said the following quote, it's trivia. Yeah, okay.
Speaker 1: Deep intellectual things are just my jam Was that Karin?
Speaker 1: Was that Olivia or was that Jade? Deep intellectual things
Speaker 1: are just my jade? That was Olivia saying, oh my god,
Speaker 1: you know what what Lauren Lakis, thank you know, you
Speaker 1: were the Nike goddess of just do it. You told
Speaker 1: me to do this, and I'm doing I'm so excited
Speaker 1: you're doing it. I think it's gonna be great. And
Speaker 1: this is leading if you want to if you want
Speaker 1: to pre order, apparently you need to sell eight thousand
Speaker 1: books to get on the New York Times bestseller and
Speaker 1: so we please buy eight everybody buy it. Please. I'll
Speaker 1: pay you. This is your way of showing your appreciation
Speaker 1: for this podcast that has given you so much over
Speaker 1: the years. It takes so little on your part. I mean,
Speaker 1: just do it. I truly I really feel this way.
Speaker 1: This is like the same thing as basically somebody like
Speaker 1: pasting their go fund me, like just go donate by
Speaker 1: buying a book helping. I will decide if anybody brings it, literally,
Speaker 1: even to the grocery store that I'm at. I will
Speaker 1: sign any book that anybody, but I'll drive a picture.
Speaker 1: Every listener on this episode bought it. Oh my god,
Speaker 1: how amazing would it be? And if you're the person going, well,
Speaker 1: it's not gonna be me, you're working with the whole
Speaker 1: deal because if everybody did it, so I want. My
Speaker 1: dream is to be a New York Times bestseller. You
Speaker 1: need to sell eight thousand coffee and do that. Do that,
Speaker 1: you can do it. Everybody. Just go buy it on
Speaker 1: am as someone else you know who likes to read
Speaker 1: memoirs and things that just by by the way, when
Speaker 1: you're pre ordering, it's a gift to your future self
Speaker 1: because you click by you later you get this book
Speaker 1: in your mailbox, like, oh cool. You know what. There's
Speaker 1: a lot of things that I've done that I would
Speaker 1: say it's not that good. I think the book actually
Speaker 1: is good. It's called Little Miss Little Compton. You can
Speaker 1: pre order it on Amazon, bring it anywhere you can
Speaker 1: find me, and I'll sign it. Just don't break into
Speaker 1: my house because that's creepy. No, no, don't don't go
Speaker 1: anywhere near her home, but just yes, bring it to sign,
Speaker 1: sign anything, and truly just don't be the person who
Speaker 1: messes up. Go order it. You're listening now, you're thinking
Speaker 1: about it, you like harden, Oh my god. Um, Lauren
Speaker 1: feeling thorny and thank you for our nice off shoot, Anna,
Speaker 1: thank you for helping us listeners. We love you, and
Speaker 1: um there'll be more of these. Thank you so much
Speaker 1: by I hope you guys have enjoyed this episode as
Speaker 1: much as we enjoyed recording it. As a very special offer,
Speaker 1: I've paired with the company. It's called Premier Collectibles and
Speaker 1: they work with offers and I have a giveaway. For
Speaker 1: the first two and fifty orders, um, you get one
Speaker 1: of the really nice little Miss Little Compton tote bags
Speaker 1: and a signed book plate, so it all comes with
Speaker 1: the purchase of the book. For the second two and
Speaker 1: fifty people you get assigned book plates, so there's five
Speaker 1: d total. But for the first to fifty you get
Speaker 1: the book, you get the canvas little Miss Little Compton
Speaker 1: book UM tote bag that you can look at on
Speaker 1: our Facebook, and then you get it personally signed by
Speaker 1: me in the book, So if you go to Arden
Speaker 1: Marine book dot com that's a R D E N
Speaker 1: M Y R I N dot com. Or if you
Speaker 1: just go to Premier Collectibles and you put my name
Speaker 1: in you can find it um and that's a special offer.
Speaker 1: So for the first two hundred fifty orders you get
Speaker 1: the book, a tote and assigned book plate. The second
Speaker 1: to fifty assigned book plates, so get them all day
Speaker 1: last thank you to get all up and get to
Speaker 1: night so good. I'm just gonna wonder the question to
Speaker 1: figure when you reach this role over you except this
Speaker 1: role to your word. You read some of these rolls
Speaker 1: into your world? Will you accept this rose is a
Speaker 1: production of I Heart Radio. For more podcast on iHeart Radio,
Speaker 1: visit the i heart Radio app, Apple podcast, or wherever
Speaker 1: you listen to your favorite shows.