WEBVTT - BONUS: Keep Calm And Carry On 0:00:05.920 --> 0:00:08.360 Hella, my Loves. Welcome to the bonus episode of the 0:00:08.400 --> 0:00:09.639 Get Them a La Podcast. 0:00:09.920 --> 0:00:11.400 T oh Hey. 0:00:12.480 --> 0:00:15.680 So I was thinking of questions that I had for 0:00:15.760 --> 0:00:20.079 you guys for the bonus and today's. I wanted to know, basically, 0:00:20.200 --> 0:00:24.400 how do you, as an adult or a parent react 0:00:24.720 --> 0:00:30.280 in an emergency type situation, whether it's evacuation, your kid 0:00:30.360 --> 0:00:32.960 got hurt. I wanted to know it all. And I 0:00:32.960 --> 0:00:35.880 actually got some really good responses, but also some really 0:00:35.880 --> 0:00:38.040 funny ones. And you'd be shocked at how many people 0:00:38.200 --> 0:00:46.280 just say, my parental intuition kicks in and I'm like okay. 0:00:46.320 --> 0:00:47.680 So I had a lot of those, but then other 0:00:47.680 --> 0:00:50.680 people who were like, I don't I freak. I completely freaking. 0:00:51.200 --> 0:00:57.120 Depends on the situation it happens to you, mom babies, 0:00:57.440 --> 0:01:03.560 I'm good, like I can be calm and go okay 0:01:03.640 --> 0:01:06.600 A to b to see, let's get us there right. 0:01:06.640 --> 0:01:11.640 If it happens to me, it's flustered, fetal position and 0:01:11.760 --> 0:01:12.760 whatever happens happens. 0:01:12.920 --> 0:01:15.800 Cause some people do short circuit. Oh that's me in 0:01:16.959 --> 0:01:19.320 situations where you have to make. 0:01:20.040 --> 0:01:21.320 A split decision. Yes. 0:01:21.880 --> 0:01:25.960 So this actually took me back to I think Ocean 0:01:26.120 --> 0:01:30.600 was probably a year and some months and we were 0:01:30.640 --> 0:01:34.000 at the apartment still and there was so little room 0:01:34.080 --> 0:01:38.400 between like the dresser and the bed, and I was 0:01:38.440 --> 0:01:40.160 worried that she was going to fall off the bed 0:01:40.240 --> 0:01:42.160 and she because she was very close to the edge. 0:01:42.160 --> 0:01:44.400 And keep in mind, I was right there so and 0:01:44.440 --> 0:01:46.920 she's standing, so I tell her, Ocean, you have to, 0:01:47.120 --> 0:01:49.880 you know, move farther onto the bed. Mom was literally 0:01:49.920 --> 0:01:53.760 sitting on the bed as well, and she looks at me, 0:01:53.800 --> 0:01:57.120 and I think she's going to start walking from close 0:01:57.160 --> 0:01:58.559 to where she is at the edge of the bed 0:01:58.800 --> 0:02:01.600 to the middle of the bed and instead, and I'm 0:02:01.640 --> 0:02:04.680 kind of like holding her hands slightly to help her, 0:02:05.320 --> 0:02:07.640 and she looks at me and gives me like this 0:02:07.760 --> 0:02:12.200 devious little grin and jumps to sit back. But she 0:02:12.320 --> 0:02:14.680 was close to the edge, so when she went to 0:02:15.400 --> 0:02:18.280 jump and fall on her bum you go backwards a little, 0:02:19.280 --> 0:02:23.320 she was basically, you know, falling to the ground and 0:02:23.400 --> 0:02:26.679 I tried my best to catch her, but she hit 0:02:27.480 --> 0:02:29.160 the floor. And keep in mind, this is an apartment 0:02:29.200 --> 0:02:33.880 with like it's basically concrete with like linoleum. There's no 0:02:34.120 --> 0:02:37.600 cushion or anything like that. It's basically a tile floor 0:02:37.760 --> 0:02:40.680 that's meant to look like wood. They call it these days, 0:02:40.720 --> 0:02:44.800 to make it sound more bougie, they call it pet 0:02:44.840 --> 0:02:50.040 friendly flooring. So she falls and hits that floor right here, 0:02:50.680 --> 0:02:53.799 and she screams. And I'm panicking because this is the 0:02:53.840 --> 0:02:56.960 first fall off of the bed, and you hear like 0:02:57.040 --> 0:02:59.760 kids are gonna fall off the bed. Please make sure 0:02:59.840 --> 0:03:04.239 to guard your stairs because that is a terrifying trap. 0:03:04.840 --> 0:03:06.840 And I thought I was doing so well to get 0:03:06.919 --> 0:03:10.639 her to a year and some change without having anything 0:03:10.840 --> 0:03:16.000 horrendous happen. So I'm freaking out and trying to console 0:03:16.040 --> 0:03:18.440 her as she screams, and all of the sudden, she 0:03:19.600 --> 0:03:23.600 stops crying and I have her like this against me, 0:03:23.680 --> 0:03:29.640 and I lean her back, and you guys, she's dead weight. 0:03:30.120 --> 0:03:32.760 Her eyes are rolling into the back of her head. 0:03:34.080 --> 0:03:37.120 I'm screaming at my mom. Call nine one one, Call 0:03:37.240 --> 0:03:41.600 nine one one, my mother. What was maybe thirty seconds 0:03:42.560 --> 0:03:46.160 felt like an eternity. My mom had a phone in 0:03:46.200 --> 0:03:48.680 her hand and she didn't know what to do with it. 0:03:48.880 --> 0:03:54.120 She completely froze, and I, for the first I cannot 0:03:54.200 --> 0:03:56.880 believe that I handled this situation like I did. And 0:03:56.880 --> 0:03:59.120 that's why I kind of relate to people who were saying, 0:03:59.240 --> 0:04:02.440 you know you're your MoMA. Intuition kind of kicks in 0:04:02.960 --> 0:04:06.800 because I took the phone from my mom. For some reason, 0:04:06.840 --> 0:04:12.320 I remembered the past code dialed nine one one. I 0:04:12.440 --> 0:04:17.920 was completely calm, told them the exact address, and as 0:04:17.960 --> 0:04:22.239 she's trying to the dispatcher is trying to like cut 0:04:22.279 --> 0:04:24.720 me off, is what I felt. I said, you have 0:04:24.800 --> 0:04:28.240 to listen to me. There are multiple entries to my 0:04:28.400 --> 0:04:32.680 building you must enter at this point. You must use 0:04:32.839 --> 0:04:36.360 this code to get in, like I gave. I've never 0:04:36.440 --> 0:04:39.480 given that precisive direction to someone who was like to 0:04:39.560 --> 0:04:42.000 my postmates, guy, like you blacked. 0:04:41.640 --> 0:04:45.000 Out and just everything that needed to be known you knew, 0:04:45.200 --> 0:04:46.719 and you just said yes. 0:04:47.279 --> 0:04:49.920 And she was saying, you know they're coming by siren, 0:04:50.040 --> 0:04:52.360 you will hear them. And I was like, I'm at 0:04:52.360 --> 0:04:55.120 this point, I'm like, I don't hear anything. I don't 0:04:55.160 --> 0:04:58.680 hear anything, and I'm looking at Ocean and she's kind 0:04:58.680 --> 0:05:02.760 of coming to and I was asking Ocean questions at 0:05:02.760 --> 0:05:05.960 that point, how old are you? What's your name? And 0:05:06.000 --> 0:05:07.800 I just you know, she was very young, so she 0:05:07.839 --> 0:05:10.400 didn't have her vocabulary wasn't the same as what I 0:05:10.440 --> 0:05:13.479 would ask now, I did end up having them take 0:05:13.560 --> 0:05:16.479 us by ambulance to make sure that nothing was happening 0:05:16.560 --> 0:05:20.359 that I couldn't actually see. And in that ride, she 0:05:20.680 --> 0:05:25.160 was singing rocket Man and the guy was like, I 0:05:25.200 --> 0:05:28.560 think she's totally fine, but I understand why you want 0:05:28.600 --> 0:05:32.560 to take her. Uh, And that's how I responded in 0:05:32.600 --> 0:05:35.760 that moment. But I couldn't. I truly couldn't believe it. 0:05:35.960 --> 0:05:39.120 No, but you've done that a lot of times. I 0:05:39.160 --> 0:05:41.839 even feel like when we were in you know, high school, 0:05:41.880 --> 0:05:45.680 and things would happen. Dad was very good, but I 0:05:45.720 --> 0:05:50.160 remember like things happening even in Saint George or Lake Powell. Yeah, 0:05:50.200 --> 0:05:53.520 and I was younger, but like when Dad would say something, 0:05:53.680 --> 0:05:58.080 I do remember you being the help, his help and 0:05:58.160 --> 0:06:01.120 not freezing. And I don't know, I don't feel like 0:06:01.160 --> 0:06:03.120 a freezer. I don't know if I've been in a 0:06:03.120 --> 0:06:05.720 lot of things, but I am mollum. Yeah, so I 0:06:05.839 --> 0:06:06.240 might be. 0:06:06.320 --> 0:06:09.599 Oh, she was staring at you. 0:06:09.600 --> 0:06:12.760 You've done it. You've done it many times before. Yeah. 0:06:12.839 --> 0:06:15.080 I feel like I think I black out. You do blackout. 0:06:15.120 --> 0:06:19.200 It's just you. You go with just your intuition and 0:06:19.240 --> 0:06:22.480 everything else, and you just black out and do it. Yeah. 0:06:22.839 --> 0:06:25.839 No, totally. This person said, I have to remind myself 0:06:25.880 --> 0:06:28.480 I am setting an example for them, for her kids. 0:06:29.440 --> 0:06:32.640 Sometimes that's hard though, in the moment, when you're in 0:06:32.680 --> 0:06:37.040 an emergency situation and it's fight or flight, I personally 0:06:37.120 --> 0:06:39.839 the last thing on my mind is I need to 0:06:39.880 --> 0:06:42.440 set an example. But again, it depends on what you're 0:06:42.480 --> 0:06:44.840 going through. I used to flip my shit as a 0:06:44.920 --> 0:06:50.599 knee jerk reaction. Now I am just heavily medicated. I 0:06:50.640 --> 0:06:54.560 think a lot of moms will relate to that, or 0:06:54.640 --> 0:06:57.280 just adults without children, just life gets a little bit. 0:06:57.640 --> 0:07:00.280 I don't know, lie, oh my god. 0:07:00.080 --> 0:07:04.560 Well you kind of just not by choice. Uh, you 0:07:04.680 --> 0:07:07.440 have no other choice as a parent. I think it's instinct. 0:07:07.480 --> 0:07:10.640 Our children feel what we feel. That's the other thing. 0:07:10.920 --> 0:07:13.840 It's kind of like when your kid falls down and 0:07:13.920 --> 0:07:16.000 they look at you to see how you're going to 0:07:16.080 --> 0:07:17.440 go to react. 0:07:17.360 --> 0:07:21.600 And I will say, your reactions are always over the top. 0:07:22.000 --> 0:07:25.360 Wait really, oh my gosha, Like if something happens to 0:07:25.400 --> 0:07:29.760 ocean and right when you do that, your reaction makes 0:07:29.760 --> 0:07:31.560 her react before so. 0:07:31.400 --> 0:07:35.360 Sa even yeah, because sometimes. 0:07:36.160 --> 0:07:38.240 Yeah, no, I really will, because there's a lot of 0:07:38.240 --> 0:07:41.400 times where like something will happen and you'll overreact. But 0:07:41.440 --> 0:07:44.280 it's hard because you're the parent as well, so it's 0:07:44.320 --> 0:07:46.960 like you want a comfort, but you also don't want 0:07:47.000 --> 0:07:49.840 to do it. So it's like, ah, you blackout in 0:07:49.840 --> 0:07:52.400 that month, it just you overreact. 0:07:52.400 --> 0:07:55.440 Well, I also need my mind goes a million miles 0:07:55.440 --> 0:07:57.640 ahead of like how bad it could have been, So 0:07:57.720 --> 0:08:00.840 I need her to understand in that moment we cannot 0:08:00.840 --> 0:08:03.640 do that again, because even just a slight fall, I 0:08:03.640 --> 0:08:06.720 immediately go to an intrusive thought of oh my gosh, 0:08:06.960 --> 0:08:09.720 she could have snapped her neck this way, but she 0:08:09.840 --> 0:08:12.480 realized died but she didn't, but she could have. 0:08:12.840 --> 0:08:15.440 Because now I have to tell her every time I 0:08:15.520 --> 0:08:17.880 watch her it's Freeman's game. 0:08:18.040 --> 0:08:20.320 Oh lovely, she fell. 0:08:20.760 --> 0:08:23.920 Many a time in her Yes, she's great. She plays 0:08:24.040 --> 0:08:26.520 in her playroom, but like she'll be on her tramp 0:08:26.560 --> 0:08:29.200 doing something and I'll be like, no, she's going to fall, 0:08:29.440 --> 0:08:32.360 and boy does she fall. And every time I'm like, 0:08:32.400 --> 0:08:35.280 I'm just not looking, she'll look immediately at me, and 0:08:35.360 --> 0:08:39.040 after I don't stare geriff reel, she'll slowly get up 0:08:39.240 --> 0:08:42.120 and move things to act like she didn't fall. 0:08:42.280 --> 0:08:44.600 All I think about is if we reinjure those teeth, 0:08:44.600 --> 0:08:46.960 they're going to turn flat, they're falling out. 0:08:47.000 --> 0:08:48.600 Anyway, she's got a new set coming. 0:08:48.440 --> 0:08:52.400 In damage to the real root. Weirdly, I lose all 0:08:52.440 --> 0:08:55.440 emotion and just go into work mode. Very weird. And 0:08:55.480 --> 0:08:58.040 when I look back, heartless, question mark, I don't think 0:08:58.080 --> 0:08:58.439 that that's no. 0:08:58.800 --> 0:09:02.120 No, I'm going to say that you being heartless. I 0:09:02.160 --> 0:09:04.920 guess if that's what we're gonna call it in those moments, 0:09:05.160 --> 0:09:08.040 that's you putting on your mask first. Yeah, you being 0:09:08.120 --> 0:09:10.880 heartless is getting a lot of people through it because 0:09:10.920 --> 0:09:14.880 some people don't need to hear. Some people just need 0:09:14.920 --> 0:09:16.240 to be told, like you gotta do it. 0:09:16.200 --> 0:09:18.360 My gay like you, they freeze. 0:09:18.360 --> 0:09:20.760 It's nice. You don't need to do anything. You just 0:09:20.800 --> 0:09:23.840 need to get everybody a to b And if you 0:09:23.880 --> 0:09:27.080 gotta be heartless to do it, it's because those people 0:09:27.240 --> 0:09:29.120 need that reaction. 0:09:29.360 --> 0:09:31.200 I have so much running through my mind right now. 0:09:31.640 --> 0:09:34.280 No, I really do like this because I'm thinking about 0:09:34.320 --> 0:09:36.760 a lot of the things, and the more I think 0:09:36.760 --> 0:09:39.560 about it, the more I don't freeze. But like, there's 0:09:39.600 --> 0:09:41.319 a lot of the times where I'm like, I don't 0:09:41.360 --> 0:09:45.280 know what to do, so I just start doing a 0:09:45.320 --> 0:09:45.960 lot of nothing. 0:09:46.040 --> 0:09:50.280 But something makes sense that sounds like not a lot 0:09:50.320 --> 0:09:50.679 of help. 0:09:51.200 --> 0:09:51.520 I'm not. 0:09:52.040 --> 0:09:53.040 Oh great, so. 0:09:53.000 --> 0:09:57.280 It's just I freeze, but I don't freeze, Okay, you 0:09:57.320 --> 0:09:59.560 get it, Like I'm just sporadic. 0:09:59.240 --> 0:10:01.160 You know, I p we never have to find out 0:10:01.480 --> 0:10:05.920 you're like this person said, you don't you fake it 0:10:05.960 --> 0:10:09.440 for the kids and panic internally. Mom of three, including 0:10:09.480 --> 0:10:11.560 a four month old, that's a lot when you have 0:10:11.559 --> 0:10:14.160 an infant that can't even that can barely they just 0:10:14.280 --> 0:10:16.319 learned to like hold their own head up. Could you 0:10:16.360 --> 0:10:19.360 imagine being in a situation where it is your job 0:10:19.400 --> 0:10:23.600 to rally everyone in your household in the emergency situation 0:10:24.200 --> 0:10:25.000 on top. 0:10:24.760 --> 0:10:26.280 Of keeping composure. 0:10:26.920 --> 0:10:30.520 I just it can't be done. Simply cannot be done. 0:10:30.600 --> 0:10:34.679 Yeah, I'm telling you a mom's I mean, moms is 0:10:34.720 --> 0:10:36.520 that's a hard job. It's the hardest job in the 0:10:36.520 --> 0:10:37.760 world to be a mom. 0:10:37.880 --> 0:10:39.400 It's also very exhausting. 0:10:39.760 --> 0:10:43.559 I can tell I'm catching it. I get the secondhand exhaustment. 0:10:43.800 --> 0:10:46.720 Sometimes when I look at myself, I go, you do 0:10:46.840 --> 0:10:49.360 look like one of those moms who's just like. 0:10:49.920 --> 0:10:52.680 Fuck it, and isn't it a great place to be? 0:10:53.080 --> 0:10:55.640 You know, sometimes I'd like to remind myself that I 0:10:55.720 --> 0:10:58.520 like I wore a heel the other night, and I was. 0:10:58.480 --> 0:11:01.120 Like a baby tear. I'm like, what are they gonna 0:11:01.120 --> 0:11:01.960 start practicing? 0:11:03.320 --> 0:11:10.200 My knees are aching, literally mortifying. I was like walking 0:11:10.280 --> 0:11:12.680 up the stairs like praying that the door guy didn't 0:11:12.720 --> 0:11:19.000 look at me like this stupid homely bitch you wear. No, 0:11:19.200 --> 0:11:21.200 that's the whole point. I've got to get out of 0:11:21.240 --> 0:11:24.840 the sweatshirts and out of like I actually felt really 0:11:24.880 --> 0:11:27.760 cute and OHI when I like pulled myself together enough 0:11:27.760 --> 0:11:30.120 with like an off the shoulder sweater, like a pair 0:11:30.160 --> 0:11:32.679 of jeans that are actually in style now I think 0:11:32.760 --> 0:11:34.240 they had a rip in them, which I think is 0:11:34.280 --> 0:11:37.080 not in style anymore. But I can't keep up. 0:11:37.000 --> 0:11:39.520 Fully, No, there's just I wear what I have. 0:11:40.600 --> 0:11:42.920 Think of being a child again, How if things were 0:11:42.920 --> 0:11:47.240 handled calmly, I wouldn't have anxiety today. Oh my god, 0:11:47.280 --> 0:11:50.160 I'm stressing now. Am I causing my children anxiety? I 0:11:50.200 --> 0:11:53.280 hope not. I try to be calm. We spoke about 0:11:53.280 --> 0:11:55.480 this on the last episode of or No a few 0:11:55.559 --> 0:12:00.840 episodes back. How I've learned the parenting tools that Ocean needs. 0:12:01.640 --> 0:12:02.760 That really dug into me. 0:12:03.000 --> 0:12:03.560 What do you mean? 0:12:04.960 --> 0:12:07.000 I was trying to think of like all of the 0:12:07.040 --> 0:12:09.400 back things that happened with mom and dad that like 0:12:10.080 --> 0:12:14.360 we're stressful events that did they cause me stresses? 0:12:14.600 --> 0:12:16.800 Okay, I'm going to say something that's probably going to 0:12:16.840 --> 0:12:19.800 be a super unpopular opinion and I may get dragged 0:12:19.800 --> 0:12:23.400 for it, but I'm okay with it. Every single person 0:12:23.520 --> 0:12:26.520 on the planet so it is going to require a 0:12:26.679 --> 0:12:30.200 different set of skills and parents do the best they can. 0:12:31.040 --> 0:12:35.480 It's just nice to maybe understand where you're at. I can't. 0:12:36.120 --> 0:12:38.960 Here's it. Yeah, I'm not I'm not saying like, oh 0:12:39.080 --> 0:12:41.439 I am okay to feel this way because my mom 0:12:41.520 --> 0:12:46.760 and dad. Right, I'm saying it's fun to see that 0:12:47.000 --> 0:12:51.280 maybe things that happened have made me this way, and 0:12:51.320 --> 0:12:55.840 now I can start to understand that these situations betray 0:12:56.040 --> 0:12:57.240 you the anxiety. 0:12:57.280 --> 0:12:59.920 Okay, I like that. Yeah, but you know what I do? 0:13:00.120 --> 0:13:03.079 You like putting? Anytime someone writes in this says put 0:13:03.080 --> 0:13:04.880 the shoe on the other foot, what did you need? 0:13:04.960 --> 0:13:06.720 It's like when we spoke to Jenna and I said, 0:13:07.160 --> 0:13:09.640 Ocean requires this set of parenting skills. She needs to 0:13:09.640 --> 0:13:12.400 be spoken too calmly. Jenna immediately said, is that how 0:13:12.440 --> 0:13:14.440 you need to be spoken? To and I was like, 0:13:14.520 --> 0:13:17.959 oh my god, maybe that is true, because what happens 0:13:18.000 --> 0:13:22.240 is when someone tries to get hyphi with me or someone, 0:13:23.320 --> 0:13:25.440 I see their anxiety level rise. 0:13:26.040 --> 0:13:28.200 You match energy, I do match energy. 0:13:28.240 --> 0:13:28.760 I hate that. 0:13:29.040 --> 0:13:32.240 Yeah, you're an energy. Yeah so if well, that's how 0:13:32.280 --> 0:13:36.319 I've started to both of you. You and love oh no, 0:13:36.640 --> 0:13:39.360 when we are very rare. But when you, guys, when 0:13:39.640 --> 0:13:43.760 stuff is starting to pile up and you start attacking 0:13:43.800 --> 0:13:47.320 me or I attack you, like, I go, oh god, yeah, 0:13:47.520 --> 0:13:47.920 oh god. 0:13:48.000 --> 0:13:50.920 I'm so good at feeling overwhelmed and being like and it's. 0:13:50.800 --> 0:13:53.360 All your God. And that's the other thing is like, 0:13:53.440 --> 0:13:56.400 why you shit on the counter. 0:13:56.600 --> 0:13:57.880 He kind of wiped it off. 0:13:57.960 --> 0:13:58.800 That was last night. 0:14:00.040 --> 0:14:02.880 The second because it didn't happen. This person's I call 0:14:02.960 --> 0:14:06.160 my mom relatable. I don't need to call it. Your 0:14:06.320 --> 0:14:10.320 calling of the mom is probably dialing. I go mom, mom, 0:14:11.080 --> 0:14:14.679 No for real. United separated my then three and a 0:14:14.720 --> 0:14:19.000 half year old from me on a flight from o'hairtool Orlando. 0:14:19.800 --> 0:14:23.400 How yeah, because that's not a lap child anymore. I 0:14:23.440 --> 0:14:28.040 feel like that's not okay, and I think I would 0:14:28.120 --> 0:14:30.440 have lost it and been removed from this is craped. 0:14:30.720 --> 0:14:32.800 So they had to sit away from each other on 0:14:32.800 --> 0:14:37.400 the plane. My thing is, if I was on that plane, 0:14:37.920 --> 0:14:39.840 I would have been like next to her, I would 0:14:39.880 --> 0:14:42.360 have said, your child is not near you. I will 0:14:42.440 --> 0:14:44.560 I won't know where your child is. And I would 0:14:44.640 --> 0:14:48.040 assume whoever the child's seat was in or the guy 0:14:48.080 --> 0:14:50.040 was in the middle, like you should have been like, yeah, 0:14:50.120 --> 0:14:51.840 let's just swap like to me. 0:14:51.840 --> 0:14:55.040 That sometimes I people on volumes. 0:14:54.360 --> 0:14:55.880 About the people on the plane. 0:14:55.960 --> 0:14:58.480 No, you guys. I was flying back from Salt Lake 0:14:58.480 --> 0:15:01.000 to LA. My dad had just died. My mom and 0:15:01.040 --> 0:15:05.200 I wanted to sit together aka drink together, and this 0:15:05.240 --> 0:15:06.320 guy wouldn't fucking move. 0:15:06.600 --> 0:15:08.280 Yeah, So the other. 0:15:09.800 --> 0:15:14.000 No was in a middle seat, and so this nice 0:15:14.040 --> 0:15:21.440 woman and her husband they ended up separating, and so 0:15:21.520 --> 0:15:22.480 Mom and I could sit together. 0:15:22.520 --> 0:15:26.560 And I was like, this guy, you fucking I won't forget. 0:15:27.000 --> 0:15:30.400 I was flying from Miami to South Carolina. Was uh, 0:15:30.560 --> 0:15:33.160 I was coming back to LA. Yeah, but from Miami 0:15:33.240 --> 0:15:36.480 to South Carolina there were there was two people in 0:15:36.560 --> 0:15:38.840 first class that wanted to sit by each other. No 0:15:38.880 --> 0:15:42.480 one would move, and so they went to two people 0:15:42.600 --> 0:15:45.400 in just like Delta comfort and gave them there too, 0:15:45.600 --> 0:15:49.080 so they could sit next to each other. Cute, right, 0:15:49.320 --> 0:15:50.520 I was like, that is cute. 0:15:50.720 --> 0:15:53.960 I have to say I've done that before. One of 0:15:54.040 --> 0:15:59.520 the only times that but I did. We gave up 0:15:59.520 --> 0:16:00.680 first class because you. 0:16:00.720 --> 0:16:03.480 Want to say yeah, but like that's the thing I 0:16:03.480 --> 0:16:06.720 I When somebody needs my seat and I'm like I 0:16:06.800 --> 0:16:09.200 can give it, I feel so great. I'll be walking 0:16:09.240 --> 0:16:11.280 on the plane like people are looking at me like 0:16:11.280 --> 0:16:12.040 I'm a nice guy. 0:16:12.200 --> 0:16:16.320 You an I don't. Unfortunately, when it comes to my kids, 0:16:16.320 --> 0:16:20.320 I definitely can't seem to stay calm, even when I'm 0:16:20.360 --> 0:16:21.760 an ex emergency officer. 0:16:22.400 --> 0:16:26.400 I know why. Why Because kids don't fucking listen. 0:16:27.200 --> 0:16:33.560 Oh that is. I want to do a bonus where 0:16:33.560 --> 0:16:37.240 there's like different parenting techniques. I want to have someone 0:16:37.320 --> 0:16:40.720 come on to talk about like each set of skills 0:16:40.760 --> 0:16:42.800 that are you know, put into a box that maybe 0:16:42.840 --> 0:16:43.800 your child requires. 0:16:43.880 --> 0:16:47.840 Yeah, like uh, five sets of skills, and like you 0:16:47.880 --> 0:16:50.560 try each one with your child to see what if they. 0:16:50.440 --> 0:16:54.320 Respond to that. Yes, science says your voice a mama's 0:16:54.400 --> 0:16:57.160 voice can be child's calm. I'm thirty three and it's 0:16:57.200 --> 0:16:58.080 still true for me. 0:16:59.360 --> 0:17:03.040 How crazy that I know? I do too, and I 0:17:03.120 --> 0:17:06.879 never pictured it, even like just the phone call of 0:17:07.000 --> 0:17:08.840 like to mom when I was going through it, like 0:17:08.960 --> 0:17:12.880 just her voice would reset me. But I never understood. 0:17:12.280 --> 0:17:16.639 That that's your mama, not a mom, just an ADHD adult. 0:17:16.760 --> 0:17:19.719 I personally get very angry and yell at everyone so 0:17:19.840 --> 0:17:22.879 relatable same you and me both, and that's a set 0:17:23.040 --> 0:17:26.640 of I want to say. I won't call them skills 0:17:26.800 --> 0:17:27.920 because sometimes I feel. 0:17:27.680 --> 0:17:28.760 Like it is well. I want to know if they're 0:17:28.800 --> 0:17:34.439 medicated for their ADHD, because I am not medicated for 0:17:34.640 --> 0:17:38.040 my ADHD. I have been. I like not being on 0:17:38.440 --> 0:17:43.199 its personal decisions, but I like not being on like 0:17:43.320 --> 0:17:45.360 adderall or vibeance. I don't like the way it makes 0:17:45.400 --> 0:17:49.440 me feel. So I really am just freelancing ADHD out here, 0:17:49.560 --> 0:17:52.159 and I get the same way. I don't know why. 0:17:52.240 --> 0:17:54.480 There's just spurts of like, oh you fucking need to 0:17:54.520 --> 0:17:57.960 yell at someone or something, and then like time goes 0:17:57.960 --> 0:18:02.159 by and then I forget that. Wow, it's fun in 0:18:02.200 --> 0:18:03.800 this brand, it's a circus. 0:18:04.240 --> 0:18:08.880 I like people who yell it's great like this Larry David. 0:18:08.600 --> 0:18:11.320 Kind of because I that's who I aspire to be. 0:18:11.800 --> 0:18:14.280 Sadly, I rely on my husband. He was a firefighter 0:18:14.359 --> 0:18:17.399 slash EMT and I pray he's around if an emergency happens. 0:18:17.720 --> 0:18:22.120 Number one, thank you to your husband for what he does. Yes, 0:18:22.440 --> 0:18:25.760 what he does, And I feel like that really would 0:18:25.760 --> 0:18:27.480 bring so much calmness. 0:18:28.640 --> 0:18:30.240 Also, I bet he's way hot. 0:18:30.480 --> 0:18:32.640 Yeah, just like you look at that no matter what's 0:18:32.680 --> 0:18:34.439 going on, you look at a man who is just 0:18:34.920 --> 0:18:37.680 face to face with a fire and you're like, it 0:18:37.800 --> 0:18:39.639 can't all right, it can't be that. 0:18:39.840 --> 0:18:43.399 First of all, thank you for what you do. She's 0:18:43.440 --> 0:18:46.480 looking at him. And when you get back, I really 0:18:46.520 --> 0:18:47.399 would love to fuck you. 0:18:48.000 --> 0:18:51.760 Climb you like a tree. Climb you like the tree 0:18:51.840 --> 0:18:52.400 you put out. 0:18:52.600 --> 0:18:55.399 Take a deep breath and hold back my reaction because 0:18:55.400 --> 0:18:59.000 I know the second I show fear it's over, you're 0:18:59.080 --> 0:19:02.840 on the whole household in arms badly. When my grandpa fell, 0:19:03.040 --> 0:19:05.800 I broke his wrist, my husband had to yell yell 0:19:05.840 --> 0:19:07.840 at me more than once to call nine one one. 0:19:07.920 --> 0:19:10.120 That's Lisa, where I was like, call nine one one, 0:19:10.800 --> 0:19:15.560 call nine one one, just sitting there. I'm as a 0:19:15.560 --> 0:19:18.159 wife of a first responder, whenever my husband is in 0:19:18.200 --> 0:19:21.240 a fire or call, I pray first and focus on 0:19:21.280 --> 0:19:24.720 our son. A men to that, and thank you for 0:19:24.800 --> 0:19:27.960 what your husband does. Yes, I go extremely calm. My 0:19:28.080 --> 0:19:30.879 son got a toy hook in his eye, and inside 0:19:31.240 --> 0:19:33.760 I was panicking, but I had to be calm, and 0:19:33.840 --> 0:19:35.720 I just picked him up and looked at my friend 0:19:35.760 --> 0:19:37.560 and said, I'll call. 0:19:37.600 --> 0:19:39.960 Like an actual like fish hook or like just like 0:19:40.000 --> 0:19:41.080 a little play plast. 0:19:40.880 --> 0:19:43.040 Looked at my friend and said I'll call you, and 0:19:43.160 --> 0:19:46.679 drove straight to the hospital. I've had situations where I've 0:19:46.720 --> 0:19:48.199 had to put Ocean in the car due to like 0:19:48.240 --> 0:19:51.560 a sickness, and it's the most terrifying thing to put 0:19:51.680 --> 0:19:54.320 a hurt or sick child into the back of the 0:19:54.400 --> 0:19:56.800 car where you have no eyes on them except for 0:19:56.840 --> 0:19:59.760 maybe like a little mirror, and then you think about 0:19:59.760 --> 0:20:02.119 them strapped in there and if you need to get 0:20:02.160 --> 0:20:04.960 them out quickly, it's just a montage of shit. 0:20:04.720 --> 0:20:07.600 That, like you just said, not being able to see him, 0:20:07.640 --> 0:20:09.239 and like he's got a hook in his eye and 0:20:09.280 --> 0:20:11.520 you don't want him to touch his own eye, so 0:20:11.680 --> 0:20:15.600 you're that's shout out to the mama. 0:20:16.080 --> 0:20:18.119 I work at a hospital, so I see this stuff, 0:20:18.119 --> 0:20:20.399 but when it's my kid, Nope, I lose it. I 0:20:20.400 --> 0:20:24.120 think that that's totally relatable. Usually cry and then take 0:20:24.160 --> 0:20:26.240 them for a treat. And play their favorite songs. 0:20:27.800 --> 0:20:29.000 Taking that in our arsenal. 0:20:29.119 --> 0:20:32.119 Yeah, they get like really upset about something, would you 0:20:32.280 --> 0:20:36.480 like a cooking and some Taylor Swift shake it off. 0:20:37.400 --> 0:20:38.919 That's a way to get them right out of their 0:20:38.920 --> 0:20:42.320 own feelings. My girls are nineteen and seventeen, and I 0:20:42.359 --> 0:20:45.359 still act a fool. Yeah, probably because at that age 0:20:45.359 --> 0:20:47.280 they're now like stealing the car and shit. 0:20:47.920 --> 0:20:48.920 Mom still acts a fool. 0:20:49.240 --> 0:20:51.679