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Speaker 1: Hey, y'all, Amy here. I appreciate you guys listening to

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Speaker 1: our Bobby Bone Show podcast. I want to recommend a

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Speaker 1: show for you from my podcast network that I think

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Speaker 1: you'll definitely like. My friend Lisa Ham has a podcast

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Speaker 1: called The Truthist Life, and the whole premise is that,

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Speaker 1: you know, in the age of social media, filters and

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Speaker 1: highlight reels, we all work pretty tirelessly to make sure

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Speaker 1: that no one sees our cracks, our faults and the

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Speaker 1: messy moments. But what if we let our humans show.

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Speaker 1: What if instead we stride for unconditional vulnerability. Only then

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Speaker 1: could we stay soft in life's hardest moments and show

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Speaker 1: up as our true selves, the version of us the

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Speaker 1: world needs. Now. On The Truthiest Life, Lisa shares tips,

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Speaker 1: tools and conversations that will leave you inspired and ready

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Speaker 1: to live your own truthist life. It's a great podcast

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Speaker 1: and I think you'll really like it, especially this episode

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Speaker 1: I'm about to share, So go subscribe and listen on

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Speaker 1: iHeartRadio or wherever you listen a podcast. Now here's Lisa

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Speaker 1: Hay with an episode of The Truthius Life. I know fry.

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Speaker 1: Even when times geth heart and you feuck, you're in

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Speaker 1: a time, Cuscye just how beautiful life can be when

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Speaker 1: you sophen in your heart you can finist live your

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Speaker 1: true cious life. Hey everyone, welcome to the first episode

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Speaker 1: of The Truthiest Life. I seriously can't even believe it.

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Speaker 1: I'm so excited to be doing this and thankful that

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Speaker 1: you're here. Before we kick off our first episode in

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Speaker 1: just a few moments, I just want to say hello, Ed.

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Speaker 1: I want to let you know that you can expect

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Speaker 1: a new episode every week on Friday, so be sure

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Speaker 1: to subscribe. That's what you do in podcast world. And

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Speaker 1: thank you so much for your support. After listening to

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Speaker 1: the episode, I would so appreciate if you rated it

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Speaker 1: and if you had any feedback or just want to

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Speaker 1: spread some positivity, leave some comments. On this first episode,

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Speaker 1: we're joined by Bree Laslie. Bree survived and attempted murder

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Speaker 1: and as a result, she has become such a force

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Speaker 1: in this world. I can't wait for you to hear

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Speaker 1: her story. I do have to give a content warning here.

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Speaker 1: Bree's story does involve sexual and physical violence, assault and blood,

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Speaker 1: so if that is too much for you, just want

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Speaker 1: to make sure that you're protected and this stays a

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Speaker 1: safe space. There's so much to Breez's story and without

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Speaker 1: further ado, let's meet Bree today. We have Bree Laslie

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Speaker 1: on the podcast. Bree is a living miracle. She survived

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Speaker 1: and attempted murder with her sister Kaylee, And what really

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Speaker 1: draws me to Bree is how she's taken what's a

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Speaker 1: terrible life event and turned it into a passion for

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Speaker 1: protecting and helping others. For many, they may sweep this

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Speaker 1: incident under the rug, pretend it didn't happen, or unquote

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Speaker 1: not want to talk about it. But instead Bree has

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Speaker 1: made a career out of talking about it. And that's

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Speaker 1: really brave because I imagine it doesn't get easier as

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Speaker 1: many times as you have told this story at this point.

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Speaker 1: One of the things I have learned by being Bree's

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Speaker 1: friend on the internet is that while the event and

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Speaker 1: the fight was over that night, the internal battle begins

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Speaker 1: after that fight. So welcome Bree to the Truthiest Life podcast.

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Speaker 1: And it is such an honor to be seeing your

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Speaker 1: face like this. Yes, we're finally friends in real life.

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Speaker 1: Now took into it and I'm so honored to be

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Speaker 1: on your podcast. I've looked up to you ever since

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Speaker 1: we connected on Instagram, and I just love what you're

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Speaker 1: doing and I'm excited for this platform for you more

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Speaker 1: people to hear the good word. So, before we kind

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Speaker 1: of jump into your story of five years ago, I

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Speaker 1: can't believe it was five years ago, by the way.

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Speaker 1: I normally like to jump right into the quote unquote

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Speaker 1: juicy stuff, the stuff that people kind of like brush

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Speaker 1: under the rug. But your story is actually very out

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Speaker 1: in the open, and so before we kind of pivot

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Speaker 1: into it, I feel like doing a really big disservice

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Speaker 1: to our guests and myself to not know who Brie

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Speaker 1: was pre event. So can you tell us, like before

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Speaker 1: September twenty fifteen, who Bree was, Like, what did your

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Speaker 1: life look like? Now? You know, we all we know

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Speaker 1: what it looks like now, But what did it look

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Speaker 1: like pre event? I grew up in Utah and a

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Speaker 1: family of five children. In the second oldest. I was

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Speaker 1: very much so a homebody. I got homesick at like

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Speaker 1: a friend's house. I always wanted just to be a

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Speaker 1: home like playing outside of my friends. After high school,

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Speaker 1: I didn't know what I was going to do. I

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Speaker 1: didn't know like what school, what college, I wanted to

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Speaker 1: go to I wasn't sure, and so in my home

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Speaker 1: at class, I was online and I decided to sign

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Speaker 1: up to go to China. And it said like, Okay,

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Speaker 1: if you sign up, can't quit. If if you like

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Speaker 1: drop out, then you have to pay even more than

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Speaker 1: it cost to go. Well, I was like, well, if

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Speaker 1: I do this, like my parents can't say no, which

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Speaker 1: I understand that is a huge privileged situation. So I

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Speaker 1: signed up and two weeks after high school I went

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Speaker 1: to Gaylien, China, and I lived there for almost a year,

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Speaker 1: teaching England. It came out of nowhere, like I was

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Speaker 1: just this homebody and then all of a sudden, I'm like,

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Speaker 1: of all places I'm going to go, Yeah, just the

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Speaker 1: farthest with friends. I'm like town in China. So I

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Speaker 1: lived in China. I absolutely loved it. I arriving meeting

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Speaker 1: new people and new culture and just knew everything. I

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Speaker 1: absolutely loved my time there, and then that kind of changed.

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Speaker 1: That experience changed me. So from China, I lived in

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Speaker 1: five different countries, teaching English and volunteering just doing missionary work.

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Speaker 1: I did missionary work in Brazil for a year and

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Speaker 1: a half. I loved that, and I just became this independent,

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Speaker 1: adventure seeking traveler that just loved other cultures and loved

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Speaker 1: other people. So when you came back, were you still

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Speaker 1: doing that? You were teaching English. I came back and

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Speaker 1: studying Dintal Hygiene. I was at Dintal Hygiene School, and

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Speaker 1: then I started I was teaching English on the side,

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Speaker 1: and then I was just making more money teaching English

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Speaker 1: on the side, and so I actually dropped out of

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Speaker 1: Dinnal Higie School and started in English business. And I

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Speaker 1: know your teeth are really important to you, and I'm

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Speaker 1: looking at them right now and I see why. But

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Speaker 1: I think we'll get to that a little bit later

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Speaker 1: in the story. So you were kind of living your

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Speaker 1: passion that you found. And how old are you now?

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Speaker 1: Right now, I'm thirty two, So you were twenty seven

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Speaker 1: when your life changed. Yes, that's like pretty established in life,

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Speaker 1: considering anybody who has met you since year twenty seven

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Speaker 1: probably doesn't know who Bree was before. Yeah, that's a

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Speaker 1: whole lifetime twenty seven. It is, it really is. It's

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Speaker 1: a shame to not acknowledge that you were a thriving

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Speaker 1: person before this and get to know because you had

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Speaker 1: to say goodbye to that person without knowing it, forced

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Speaker 1: to say goodbye to it, right, like forced to redefine,

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Speaker 1: And that's really scary, especially for women. It's hard to

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Speaker 1: get comfortable in our own skin, and it's hard to

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Speaker 1: find confidence and just around the board with our bodies,

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Speaker 1: with everything. The day before my attack, I remember calling

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Speaker 1: my mom and just being so giddy on the phone,

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Speaker 1: and I was like, I finally feel like I'm where

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Speaker 1: I've wanted to be for so long and where I've

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Speaker 1: worked so hard to be first along, and life is

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Speaker 1: just really good. So one thing about you that I

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Speaker 1: heard you say on a podcast, which I just think

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Speaker 1: is really quirky and cute and kind of telling as well,

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Speaker 1: is that you love a before and after, yes, like

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Speaker 1: the infomercial kind like a deep cleaning situation, like a

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Speaker 1: stain remover love it. I just think that that's a

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Speaker 1: personality quirk that everybody kind of needs to know about

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Speaker 1: you because it also fits into your life. Right, So

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Speaker 1: there's life, there's Bree pre event, and then there's a

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Speaker 1: Bree post event. Yeah, and so you're kind of a

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Speaker 1: walking before and after yourself, which is kind of cool. Meta.

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Speaker 1: I love that you put that together. I appreciate it

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Speaker 1: so much. But yes it is. But you liked before

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Speaker 1: and after Before that, yeah, I mean it got weird

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Speaker 1: like I would waste not any I mean it wasn't

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Speaker 1: waste to me because I thoroughly enjoyed it, but just

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Speaker 1: watching like cleaning videos or whatever it was, I absolutely

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Speaker 1: loved it. You remind me so much of my husband,

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Speaker 1: which is funny, including being late to this meeting. Are

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Speaker 1: you a late person too? I've turned into one a

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Speaker 1: little bit, all right. So what is one adjective to

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Speaker 1: describere pre event? It's like spontaneous. Probably, Well that shows

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Speaker 1: in your trip to China at eighteen, for sure. I

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Speaker 1: love that. Okay. So September twenty third, twenty fifteen, five

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Speaker 1: years ago to the day, and weird enough. I think

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Speaker 1: I asked you to be on this podcast on that

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Speaker 1: day without realizing it. That dare the day before, and

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Speaker 1: now we're here about to talk about the day itself.

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Speaker 1: So what happened on September third, twenty fifteen. I think

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Speaker 1: it's important to note that six days before that date,

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Speaker 1: me and my little sister had just moved out of

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Speaker 1: the home that we've been living in for a couple

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Speaker 1: of years. You're renting it from a friend of ours.

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Speaker 1: And he came over and was like, I'm so sorry

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Speaker 1: to do this, but I just got a huge offer

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Speaker 1: on this house and I can't pass it up. It's like,

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Speaker 1: you guys, work with me, like I'll help you, like

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Speaker 1: I'll cover like financial costs or whatever it is, but

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Speaker 1: can you work with me? Of course helping a friend out,

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Speaker 1: you know, we didn't want him to lose that offer.

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Speaker 1: So we had Wednesday to Monday to find any place

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Speaker 1: to live. Like how do you do that? You know?

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Speaker 1: So I was online basically from the moment he told

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Speaker 1: us until Saturday, looking for a new home and just

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Speaker 1: searching around town. And I it was like Friday and

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Speaker 1: like eleven thirty at night, I found this house on

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Speaker 1: Roberta Street and it was just newly refurnished duplex and

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Speaker 1: super cute inside. It was right downtown Salt Lake. It's

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Speaker 1: really hard right down town Saltlake. I mean the majority

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Speaker 1: of the homes are like pioneer homes, like historic buildings,

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Speaker 1: and so it's hard to find spaces with all the

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Speaker 1: amenities that you want. You know, this had everything and

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Speaker 1: including like hardwood floors, like huge chandeliers built in bookshelves,

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Speaker 1: and I know it sounds silly, but like we were

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Speaker 1: just so excited about it. That had this backyard with

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Speaker 1: hanging white lights, a big beautiful tree. I emailed the

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Speaker 1: dude like he put it up probably twenty seconds before

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Speaker 1: I found it. So I emailed them and I was like,

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Speaker 1: we want this place. He's like, you gotta chill out, girl,

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Speaker 1: like come and look at it, like take a walk through.

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Speaker 1: And I was like, nope, don't need to less spontaneous, right,

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Speaker 1: you're spontaneous, and so I was like, no, no no, we

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Speaker 1: don't need to. We just want to stop, like just

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Speaker 1: let us have it. And he's like, at least come

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Speaker 1: and walk through it tomorrow. So we're like cool. So

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Speaker 1: we went and walked through it. There are some applications

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Speaker 1: like on the counter. There's a lot of other people

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Speaker 1: walking through it. I kind of hate admitting this, but

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Speaker 1: then I look it back and I'm like, hey, maybe

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Speaker 1: I saved them. You know, maybe it's but I took

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Speaker 1: the applications and put them in a drawer so nobody

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Speaker 1: else could get them. So we got the home. We

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Speaker 1: moved in on Monday, and we were there for almost

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Speaker 1: a week. Actually with the following Wednesday. We shared the

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Speaker 1: duplex with an older lady who had lived there for

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Speaker 1: twenty five years. She always wanted to talk. Anytime she

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Speaker 1: heard us to open our door, she always opened her

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Speaker 1: door and she was like on her porch ready to visit.

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Speaker 1: And so I was always visiting with her, and I

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Speaker 1: just figured, oh, she shares like the same duplex and

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Speaker 1: the floor layout. So she was really interested in what

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Speaker 1: room I took and what were my little sister took.

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Speaker 1: And I told her that Kaylee was younger than me,

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Speaker 1: and I was just being friendly, you know, like I

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Speaker 1: didn't think anything of it. And one day before Kaylee

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Speaker 1: went on her sacation, she was like, don't get too

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Speaker 1: chummy with her. She was like, I have like a

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Speaker 1: weird vibe about her, and I want to like welcome

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Speaker 1: anybody in and like host dinner or something. You know.

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Speaker 1: She's like, don't invite her to dinner, like she's not

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Speaker 1: allowed in our house. That was Kaylee's advice. Yeah, And

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Speaker 1: I was like, dang, and She's like, I'm not kidding.

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Speaker 1: I get this really weird vibe from her. I mean

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Speaker 1: I told Sandy everything. I told her what room I took.

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Speaker 1: I told her ab room Kayley took. I told her

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Speaker 1: Kayley was younger than me. I told her all about me.

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Speaker 1: I told her that Kaylee and boot Blaine were going

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Speaker 1: on a staycation and they love getaways and just fun things.

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Speaker 1: You know. When he came in my window, we didn't

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Speaker 1: I didn't know him. I've never seen him before. Looking

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Speaker 1: back now, I just I often wonder if she had

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Speaker 1: something to do with it. Really, I've never heard you

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Speaker 1: say that, and the police haven't been able to figure

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Speaker 1: anything out there. Our case was closed when I think

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Speaker 1: all focus went on making sure that our officer was cleared. Okay,

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Speaker 1: so let's let's get to that. He comes in your

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Speaker 1: room and is he allowed. No. He used a really wiet,

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Speaker 1: kind almost I hate to say this, but like almost

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Speaker 1: like an attractive, like very soft voice. The sound of

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Speaker 1: his voice, it wasn't scary, okay. So he just climbs

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Speaker 1: through the window, climbs through the window. I don't know

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Speaker 1: if I told you this, but we had like a

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Speaker 1: six foot fence around our house. My window seven feet

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Speaker 1: off the ground. So he had set up a metal

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Speaker 1: chair that he got off of our neighbor's porch, and

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00:12:15,120 --> 00:12:18,079
Speaker 1: he used her indoor broomstick to open my window? Is

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Speaker 1: that sandy? Yeah? That neighbor. Okay, got it. And so

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Speaker 1: when he was opening my window, I was in the

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Speaker 1: bathroom getting ready for bed. I didn't hear him do that.

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Speaker 1: When I went back to my room, I didn't notice

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Speaker 1: that the window was all the way open. And what

256
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Speaker 1: time is this? Probably like eleven fifty five? Probably, Okay,

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Speaker 1: that's a creepy hour. Yeah. Again, I look over, I

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Speaker 1: see him come in. I'm in on my bed in

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Speaker 1: my underwear. My first thought was he's going to rave

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Speaker 1: with me. I need to get off my bed. But

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Speaker 1: I don't know. If you've ever had a bad dream

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Speaker 1: where you go to move and you can't, That's exactly

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Speaker 1: what happened to me. I was frozen. But I knew

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Speaker 1: in my head. I knew, like a breeze, get up, move,

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Speaker 1: go to the window, hurry out, But I just I couldn't.

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Speaker 1: And then I finally did. When I went over to

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Speaker 1: the window. My hope was that I could get there

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Speaker 1: time to push him out. Because he came in. His

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Speaker 1: fingers were over the window sill. He's picking up himself

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Speaker 1: on his palms of his hands and then coming head

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Speaker 1: first in and then just one by one he put

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Speaker 1: each hand on the ground and then his feet flopped

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Speaker 1: in and then he was standing up. So by the

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Speaker 1: time I got over to the window, he was standing up,

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Speaker 1: and I just ran straight into him. So I remember

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Speaker 1: my face hitting his sweaty chest and have a shirt on.

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Speaker 1: He was wearing these khaki shorts, like cargo shorts that

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Speaker 1: no one should be wearing. He was wearing those shorts,

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Speaker 1: and he was huge. He was six foot two, two

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Speaker 1: hundred and ten pounds and ripped. I just remember hitting

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Speaker 1: his body and it was just solid, and I was terrified,

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Speaker 1: and five three I looked up. I don't stand a chance.

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Speaker 1: And after your body hit his, were you still paralyzed

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Speaker 1: or like did that? No? I was still I was

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Speaker 1: still paralyzed. I remember like trying to make noise, but

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Speaker 1: my mouth was completely dry, which is a panic attack,

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00:13:52,640 --> 00:13:54,720
Speaker 1: which I didn't know. So it was so dry that

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00:13:54,760 --> 00:13:57,400
Speaker 1: like I couldn't even form like a sentence if I

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00:13:57,440 --> 00:13:59,560
Speaker 1: wanted to, I couldn't even I couldn't even speak, And

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Speaker 1: I remember putting my hands up, so I had both

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Speaker 1: my hands up kind of protecting my face and just

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Speaker 1: saying please, no, please, no. I had my phone in

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Speaker 1: my hand. I have like a little sling thing on

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Speaker 1: the back of my phone, so I had my phone.

295
00:14:12,960 --> 00:14:14,400
Speaker 1: I went to give him my phone. I said, here,

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Speaker 1: take my phone, there's my computer, take my keys, take

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00:14:18,240 --> 00:14:20,680
Speaker 1: anything you want, and he didn't. I figured he was

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00:14:20,720 --> 00:14:24,080
Speaker 1: just somebody's brother, somebody's dad. Just figured give him anything

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00:14:24,120 --> 00:14:26,560
Speaker 1: he wants and then obviously he'll take it and leave right.

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00:14:26,560 --> 00:14:29,320
Speaker 1: And if you know somebody with like addiction, you know

301
00:14:29,520 --> 00:14:31,880
Speaker 1: that they're happy if you can give them what they want,

302
00:14:31,920 --> 00:14:35,120
Speaker 1: which is money to go get the fix. But it's

303
00:14:35,200 --> 00:14:39,080
Speaker 1: interesting in that moment, like you were non violent towards him,

304
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Speaker 1: just let me help him, almost give him what he needs,

305
00:14:41,800 --> 00:14:44,880
Speaker 1: get him out of here. But you gave him the things,

306
00:14:44,960 --> 00:14:47,400
Speaker 1: and he had zero interest in it. Yeah, And did

307
00:14:47,480 --> 00:14:50,720
Speaker 1: the fight start immediately after you banging into his body?

308
00:14:51,080 --> 00:14:53,800
Speaker 1: He came in swinging, so he is catching both hands.

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00:14:54,000 --> 00:14:56,960
Speaker 1: He puts his one hand up against over my mouth,

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Speaker 1: shows me up against my bedroom door, tells me just like,

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Speaker 1: shut up. He said, shut up and cooperate with me,

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Speaker 1: or I'm going downstairs to get your little sister. And

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Speaker 1: that was a moment. I wait a second, how does

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Speaker 1: he know that my little sister's downstairs, and how does

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00:15:09,760 --> 00:15:11,640
Speaker 1: he know that she's younger than me? Anyone that meets

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00:15:11,680 --> 00:15:13,640
Speaker 1: us at the same time always assumed at the time,

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00:15:13,760 --> 00:15:17,320
Speaker 1: unfortunately not anymore at the time, assumed that Kayley was

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Speaker 1: older than me. And how does he know which room

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00:15:19,840 --> 00:15:21,760
Speaker 1: she's in exactly? Or I don't know the land Is

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00:15:21,760 --> 00:15:23,960
Speaker 1: it obvious based on the light out of your house? No?

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Speaker 1: And that was the other thing. Even when we were

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Speaker 1: walking through the house for the very first time, I

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00:15:28,680 --> 00:15:31,840
Speaker 1: was like online, I was asking the landlord. I was like, online,

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Speaker 1: I swear there was a basement, there's a room in

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Speaker 1: the basement. And he was like, oh, yeah, this layout

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Speaker 1: is super weird. It's around the fridge and he's like,

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00:15:38,320 --> 00:15:40,800
Speaker 1: I know, it's really weird. That was another thing. I'm like,

328
00:15:40,800 --> 00:15:42,200
Speaker 1: what the heck? Like, how does he know that we

329
00:15:42,240 --> 00:15:45,120
Speaker 1: have a basement? Her room's directly below mine, so her

330
00:15:45,160 --> 00:15:47,320
Speaker 1: window was ground level. It would have been a lot

331
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Speaker 1: easier for him to go through that window, but he didn't.

332
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Speaker 1: How many floors is the house too? What happens next?

333
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Speaker 1: So I knew I needed to get him out of

334
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Speaker 1: my room, and I also didn't want Kaylee to experience

335
00:15:59,080 --> 00:16:01,480
Speaker 1: what I was experienced. Did you want Kaylee to hear

336
00:16:01,520 --> 00:16:03,720
Speaker 1: you though? Did you want her to hear screams? Yeah?

337
00:16:03,800 --> 00:16:06,680
Speaker 1: I mean I did, But more than that, I just

338
00:16:07,000 --> 00:16:09,640
Speaker 1: wanted him out before she had to experience it. So

339
00:16:09,800 --> 00:16:11,360
Speaker 1: I figured if I could pull him out of my

340
00:16:11,400 --> 00:16:13,680
Speaker 1: room and get him into the kitchen in the dining room,

341
00:16:13,800 --> 00:16:16,360
Speaker 1: we had a huge window in the front room, and

342
00:16:16,400 --> 00:16:18,400
Speaker 1: I was like, somebody will see and someone will come

343
00:16:18,440 --> 00:16:21,680
Speaker 1: in sidebar, which is interesting. My parents and they were

344
00:16:21,680 --> 00:16:24,640
Speaker 1: helping move our furniture in a few days before. My

345
00:16:24,680 --> 00:16:27,120
Speaker 1: mom she's in our house and she didn't want to leave.

346
00:16:27,200 --> 00:16:29,280
Speaker 1: She's telling my dad, I don't feel good about this.

347
00:16:29,480 --> 00:16:33,440
Speaker 1: I don't want to leave until they have blinds, right, Well, sorry, Mom, Like, ikea,

348
00:16:33,520 --> 00:16:36,640
Speaker 1: everything's closed, Like we can't go and get blinds. And

349
00:16:36,640 --> 00:16:38,560
Speaker 1: she's like, well, we're gonna put sheets up or something

350
00:16:38,600 --> 00:16:41,680
Speaker 1: because I feel like someone's watching and I don't feel comfortable.

351
00:16:41,840 --> 00:16:44,200
Speaker 1: So she put some sheets up, but me and Kaylee

352
00:16:44,200 --> 00:16:46,080
Speaker 1: were like, we can't have that be our first impression

353
00:16:46,080 --> 00:16:48,280
Speaker 1: in the neighborhood. So as soon as she left, we

354
00:16:48,320 --> 00:16:51,080
Speaker 1: took him down. Which I think about that now, like

355
00:16:51,160 --> 00:16:54,160
Speaker 1: it is so important to follow our intuition. My idea

356
00:16:54,280 --> 00:16:56,600
Speaker 1: was to get him into that room, maybe someone would

357
00:16:56,600 --> 00:16:59,360
Speaker 1: see him come in and help us, And unfortunately that

358
00:16:59,520 --> 00:17:02,600
Speaker 1: did not work at all. So I remember like putting

359
00:17:02,600 --> 00:17:05,360
Speaker 1: my arms like right up underneath his armpit to pull

360
00:17:05,440 --> 00:17:08,000
Speaker 1: him out, and my hands just slid all the way

361
00:17:08,040 --> 00:17:11,119
Speaker 1: down his arms. He was like silky sock and that

362
00:17:11,280 --> 00:17:13,600
Speaker 1: was scary too, because there was like nothing to grab on.

363
00:17:13,800 --> 00:17:16,320
Speaker 1: He was just so soft and sweaty, and like, you're

364
00:17:16,359 --> 00:17:19,560
Speaker 1: not a trained fighter at this point, like your us

365
00:17:19,960 --> 00:17:24,560
Speaker 1: sure everyday girl, just right, your everyday spontaneous just went

366
00:17:24,600 --> 00:17:27,239
Speaker 1: to China. Now you're back, just lived into this, like

367
00:17:27,480 --> 00:17:30,800
Speaker 1: you don't know how to fight, right? No? No, I

368
00:17:30,840 --> 00:17:34,760
Speaker 1: think I attended one self defense class that was top

369
00:17:34,800 --> 00:17:37,040
Speaker 1: by law enforcement when I was younger and like a

370
00:17:37,119 --> 00:17:41,080
Speaker 1: church group youth setting. But I don't ever remember, like

371
00:17:41,160 --> 00:17:43,960
Speaker 1: I've never thrown a punch before. I've never done any

372
00:17:44,000 --> 00:17:46,439
Speaker 1: of that, like fighting before. And is it just like

373
00:17:46,520 --> 00:17:49,440
Speaker 1: pure instinct when its survival turns on to just like

374
00:17:49,560 --> 00:17:52,120
Speaker 1: kind of know what to do or just feel comfortable

375
00:17:52,160 --> 00:17:55,920
Speaker 1: touching someone else's body almost. Well, it's interesting because there's

376
00:17:56,000 --> 00:17:58,840
Speaker 1: three different reactions, right, we have our flight and flight,

377
00:17:59,119 --> 00:18:02,000
Speaker 1: and then there's also freeze, which is a very common response.

378
00:18:02,440 --> 00:18:06,000
Speaker 1: So eighty percent of women don't fight back. Eighty percent

379
00:18:06,000 --> 00:18:08,840
Speaker 1: of women their first instinct isn't to fight back. It's

380
00:18:08,840 --> 00:18:11,640
Speaker 1: either to fight or to freeze. So only twenty percent

381
00:18:11,720 --> 00:18:14,160
Speaker 1: of women fight back. And of that twenty percent, only

382
00:18:14,200 --> 00:18:16,600
Speaker 1: seven percent of women fight back the entire time, which

383
00:18:16,640 --> 00:18:19,280
Speaker 1: is so interesting to me. So I was part of

384
00:18:19,320 --> 00:18:23,159
Speaker 1: the eighty percent that didn't fight back until my little sister.

385
00:18:23,560 --> 00:18:26,080
Speaker 1: She had just fallen asleep, but she said that she

386
00:18:26,160 --> 00:18:27,919
Speaker 1: was like in the zone where you're like about to

387
00:18:27,960 --> 00:18:30,399
Speaker 1: sleep but still kind of awake, and she heard me

388
00:18:30,520 --> 00:18:33,399
Speaker 1: making noises that she's never heard me make before, and

389
00:18:33,440 --> 00:18:36,240
Speaker 1: so she knew something was terribly wrong, that something was

390
00:18:36,280 --> 00:18:38,879
Speaker 1: really scary upstairs. And it was like it wasn't like

391
00:18:38,880 --> 00:18:41,320
Speaker 1: a spider scary, she said, yeah, And so as soon

392
00:18:41,359 --> 00:18:43,640
Speaker 1: as she heard that, she came running up the stairs.

393
00:18:43,880 --> 00:18:46,760
Speaker 1: I didn't even recognize her screaming least, like I thought

394
00:18:46,800 --> 00:18:49,639
Speaker 1: it was somebody else behind me because her voice was

395
00:18:49,680 --> 00:18:53,640
Speaker 1: so unrecognizable. So she gets involved in the fight, you mean, yeah,

396
00:18:53,640 --> 00:18:55,800
Speaker 1: So I get him into the kitchen and then I

397
00:18:55,880 --> 00:19:00,000
Speaker 1: hear her just screaming and screaming, and it's completely dark.

398
00:19:00,119 --> 00:19:02,159
Speaker 1: There's a little bit of moonlight coming through the kitchen

399
00:19:02,160 --> 00:19:04,600
Speaker 1: window in the front window, but other than that, like

400
00:19:04,680 --> 00:19:08,400
Speaker 1: you can't see detail, you know, Like I couldn't see

401
00:19:08,440 --> 00:19:11,720
Speaker 1: the tattoos like covering our attacker's body. But I could

402
00:19:11,720 --> 00:19:15,080
Speaker 1: see like his silhouette obviously, and like his mustache or whatever,

403
00:19:15,440 --> 00:19:18,280
Speaker 1: but like little details I couldn't see. So we're fighting.

404
00:19:18,359 --> 00:19:20,400
Speaker 1: She's on his back, she's trying to clause eyes out,

405
00:19:20,440 --> 00:19:23,600
Speaker 1: she's hitting him in the throat, and they're screaming at

406
00:19:23,600 --> 00:19:27,200
Speaker 1: each other, and I'm scared, and I'm like genuinely scared

407
00:19:27,240 --> 00:19:31,640
Speaker 1: of both of them, Like what is happening? What is happening?

408
00:19:31,680 --> 00:19:35,679
Speaker 1: I mean, obviously I knew it was terrifying and so scary,

409
00:19:35,800 --> 00:19:39,080
Speaker 1: but for reality to hit like this wasn't a nightmare.

410
00:19:39,200 --> 00:19:42,320
Speaker 1: This is it was really happening. But I didn't fight back,

411
00:19:42,440 --> 00:19:45,400
Speaker 1: And to tell, he started hitting my sister, and that's

412
00:19:45,400 --> 00:19:47,119
Speaker 1: when I clicked for me, and that's when I was

413
00:19:47,160 --> 00:19:49,800
Speaker 1: like a game freaking on. So that's when both of

414
00:19:49,880 --> 00:19:54,560
Speaker 1: us just went him doing anything and everything. We're screaming,

415
00:19:54,680 --> 00:19:57,520
Speaker 1: we're kicking, we're punching. We probably punched and kicked each

416
00:19:57,520 --> 00:20:01,359
Speaker 1: other like we were just going as hard as we

417
00:20:01,440 --> 00:20:03,600
Speaker 1: could to get him out of our house, and we're

418
00:20:03,640 --> 00:20:05,919
Speaker 1: both screaming at him, what do you want? Just tell

419
00:20:06,000 --> 00:20:07,840
Speaker 1: us what you want, get out of our house, Take

420
00:20:07,840 --> 00:20:10,160
Speaker 1: anything you want, just get out is a verbal. He's

421
00:20:10,240 --> 00:20:13,639
Speaker 1: kind of mumbled at that point, and I remember thinking,

422
00:20:13,720 --> 00:20:16,119
Speaker 1: at least he doesn't know where the basement is, like

423
00:20:16,160 --> 00:20:17,480
Speaker 1: at least he doesn't know how to get there. And

424
00:20:17,480 --> 00:20:19,199
Speaker 1: as soon as I finished that thought, he picked me

425
00:20:19,240 --> 00:20:21,160
Speaker 1: up like a little rag doll, threw me in front

426
00:20:21,200 --> 00:20:24,960
Speaker 1: of the basement doorway, and somehow Kaylee ended up on

427
00:20:25,000 --> 00:20:28,879
Speaker 1: the stair behind me. Kaylee wasn't taking things downstairs, and

428
00:20:28,960 --> 00:20:31,320
Speaker 1: I don't like a mess, so I looked like little

429
00:20:31,359 --> 00:20:34,080
Speaker 1: passive aggressive reminders of like, okay, hare, are your shoes

430
00:20:34,080 --> 00:20:35,920
Speaker 1: and everything else that you just like left in the

431
00:20:36,000 --> 00:20:38,240
Speaker 1: kitchen or wherever? It was like, take them down to

432
00:20:38,320 --> 00:20:41,280
Speaker 1: your room? Yeah, So I just packed them up by

433
00:20:41,280 --> 00:20:43,639
Speaker 1: the basement up stairs. So I had an iron and

434
00:20:43,720 --> 00:20:46,280
Speaker 1: her shoes. The iron was a lot taller than her

435
00:20:46,280 --> 00:20:49,320
Speaker 1: shoes were. But luckily, when he bent down to grab

436
00:20:49,359 --> 00:20:52,440
Speaker 1: something to hit Kayley, he picked up a tennis shoe

437
00:20:52,600 --> 00:20:54,600
Speaker 1: and he hit her across the face with it, and

438
00:20:54,640 --> 00:20:58,000
Speaker 1: then I'm on my knees. I'm holding his khaki cargo shorts,

439
00:20:58,040 --> 00:20:59,680
Speaker 1: and I grabbed the side of his shorts with my

440
00:20:59,760 --> 00:21:01,840
Speaker 1: left hand and then I twisted my fist into the

441
00:21:01,920 --> 00:21:03,919
Speaker 1: short so I had a good hold on it. And

442
00:21:03,960 --> 00:21:07,400
Speaker 1: then I remember everything that a girl's taught all growing up.

443
00:21:07,520 --> 00:21:09,360
Speaker 1: Hit him in the balls like a hidden as hard

444
00:21:09,400 --> 00:21:12,040
Speaker 1: as you can. If you hit somebody there, they're gonna

445
00:21:12,080 --> 00:21:13,840
Speaker 1: be down and out. We all know it. We've all

446
00:21:13,880 --> 00:21:17,560
Speaker 1: seen it. So are punching him there. I'm not missing.

447
00:21:17,720 --> 00:21:20,560
Speaker 1: I'm punching him with a fist. You're hitting him continuously,

448
00:21:20,800 --> 00:21:23,480
Speaker 1: continuing the ball. Yeah, And I'm like, on my knees,

449
00:21:23,520 --> 00:21:27,359
Speaker 1: I have a great shot. Nothing's happening. So I extend

450
00:21:27,440 --> 00:21:30,280
Speaker 1: my arm and then I'm swinging my arm up, hitting

451
00:21:30,320 --> 00:21:33,640
Speaker 1: him with my arm, elbowing him. Nothing is slowing him down.

452
00:21:33,800 --> 00:21:36,280
Speaker 1: And that's why I know, Oh, he's definitely on drugs

453
00:21:36,280 --> 00:21:38,320
Speaker 1: and this is going to be an even longer night

454
00:21:38,480 --> 00:21:41,280
Speaker 1: than I had expected. Right. That almost just tells you, like,

455
00:21:41,359 --> 00:21:45,320
Speaker 1: I don't have the power, because he has like the superpower.

456
00:21:45,440 --> 00:21:48,560
Speaker 1: In that moment, did a tax report come back to say,

457
00:21:48,680 --> 00:21:51,399
Speaker 1: like what type of drugs? Yeah, they found meth and

458
00:21:51,520 --> 00:21:54,240
Speaker 1: heroine in the system. All right, so you're you're hitting him.

459
00:21:54,240 --> 00:21:57,080
Speaker 1: He's not responding. He's not responding. Kyley standing on the

460
00:21:57,080 --> 00:22:00,280
Speaker 1: stair behind me, he lifts up his left leg and

461
00:22:00,480 --> 00:22:03,240
Speaker 1: like Ninja, kicks Kaylee down the stairs. And he kicked

462
00:22:03,240 --> 00:22:05,600
Speaker 1: her so hard that she had like a bruise of

463
00:22:05,720 --> 00:22:09,359
Speaker 1: his foot on her chest. When we were moving in, Kayley,

464
00:22:10,040 --> 00:22:13,040
Speaker 1: the stairs were like super steep and really narrow. She

465
00:22:13,080 --> 00:22:15,520
Speaker 1: had tripped down the stairs a couple of times, and

466
00:22:15,560 --> 00:22:17,720
Speaker 1: so she had counted them, so when she was walking

467
00:22:17,720 --> 00:22:19,240
Speaker 1: down the stairs, she would just count in her head,

468
00:22:19,320 --> 00:22:23,600
Speaker 1: so they're seventeen stairs were super steep, and her little

469
00:22:23,600 --> 00:22:27,200
Speaker 1: body just flew down them, not hitting one of the stairs.

470
00:22:27,240 --> 00:22:29,360
Speaker 1: And the only thing that stopped her was her head

471
00:22:29,400 --> 00:22:31,560
Speaker 1: going through the wall at the bottom of the stairs,

472
00:22:31,640 --> 00:22:34,639
Speaker 1: which was the only wall in that entire house that

473
00:22:34,720 --> 00:22:37,080
Speaker 1: wasn't made of brick, and that was put in two

474
00:22:37,119 --> 00:22:39,320
Speaker 1: days before we moved In the day that we moved in,

475
00:22:39,359 --> 00:22:41,520
Speaker 1: the paint on that wall was still wet. Her entire

476
00:22:41,640 --> 00:22:44,639
Speaker 1: head went through the wall. So, I mean, what are

477
00:22:44,680 --> 00:22:47,880
Speaker 1: you are you thinking, Kayley's done? Yeah, So, I mean

478
00:22:47,920 --> 00:22:49,840
Speaker 1: he kicked her down. She I didn't hear her make

479
00:22:49,880 --> 00:22:52,560
Speaker 1: any noises. I wasn't sure what had happened. She got

480
00:22:52,600 --> 00:22:55,760
Speaker 1: a concussion. She got back up and was running back

481
00:22:55,840 --> 00:22:58,000
Speaker 1: up the stairs to help me when he pushed me

482
00:22:58,040 --> 00:22:59,880
Speaker 1: down the stairs. But because I was holding so tightly

483
00:23:00,040 --> 00:23:02,159
Speaker 1: to his shorts, he came down with me, and so

484
00:23:02,200 --> 00:23:05,240
Speaker 1: then we just tumbled down the stairs. We hit Kayley's legs,

485
00:23:05,240 --> 00:23:07,520
Speaker 1: so then she tumbled them a few stairs with us,

486
00:23:07,760 --> 00:23:09,920
Speaker 1: and then all of us were in the pitch black

487
00:23:10,000 --> 00:23:12,760
Speaker 1: basement at the bottom of the stair lane. No windows

488
00:23:12,800 --> 00:23:15,080
Speaker 1: in the basement. There's a window on Kayley's room, but

489
00:23:15,200 --> 00:23:17,119
Speaker 1: her door was kind of shut, and so there was

490
00:23:17,240 --> 00:23:19,560
Speaker 1: like there's zero light and we are at the bottom

491
00:23:19,600 --> 00:23:22,120
Speaker 1: of the stairs and it's a war zone. We are

492
00:23:22,160 --> 00:23:26,560
Speaker 1: doing everything to get him off of us. My chest

493
00:23:26,840 --> 00:23:28,879
Speaker 1: was like on the landing of the stairs, but on

494
00:23:28,920 --> 00:23:31,840
Speaker 1: the bottom, also on the bottom stair He's on top

495
00:23:31,880 --> 00:23:34,240
Speaker 1: of me. He's hitting me, Kayley's on top of him.

496
00:23:34,640 --> 00:23:36,840
Speaker 1: Just a huge mess. I remember I have my phone.

497
00:23:36,920 --> 00:23:39,160
Speaker 1: I'm like, we gotta call nine on one. I say, hey, Siri,

498
00:23:39,440 --> 00:23:41,760
Speaker 1: call nine on one and she said, I'm sorry, Bray,

499
00:23:41,960 --> 00:23:44,520
Speaker 1: I don't understand. And my first reaction was like you

500
00:23:44,520 --> 00:23:47,480
Speaker 1: gotta be kidding me. My name's brief. Shall you ever

501
00:23:47,600 --> 00:23:51,080
Speaker 1: use Sirie before? Oh? Yeah, all the time, but it's Si.

502
00:23:51,520 --> 00:23:53,159
Speaker 1: We all know that. It's like, hey, Sari, was this

503
00:23:53,320 --> 00:23:56,480
Speaker 1: I found on the web. So it's just like but

504
00:23:56,480 --> 00:23:58,480
Speaker 1: I figured, like that command, she's not going to not

505
00:23:58,560 --> 00:24:01,119
Speaker 1: understand that, right, So yeah, that went to be like

506
00:24:01,359 --> 00:24:05,600
Speaker 1: in twelve languages. Yeah all are you listening please? Yeah?

507
00:24:05,640 --> 00:24:08,639
Speaker 1: So then I say it again three times, same response.

508
00:24:08,840 --> 00:24:12,000
Speaker 1: It was before face recognition, it had like you had

509
00:24:12,040 --> 00:24:14,720
Speaker 1: to enter the code. So I'm trying to enter my password.

510
00:24:14,760 --> 00:24:16,880
Speaker 1: I couldn't because we're fighting, And so then I say,

511
00:24:16,880 --> 00:24:19,760
Speaker 1: Siri called dad, and so she was like calling dad.

512
00:24:19,880 --> 00:24:22,000
Speaker 1: So she starts calling my dad, and I knew that

513
00:24:22,040 --> 00:24:24,400
Speaker 1: he couldn't do anything, like he's forty five minutes away,

514
00:24:24,440 --> 00:24:26,639
Speaker 1: there's nothing he can do. But it started calling. I

515
00:24:26,720 --> 00:24:28,679
Speaker 1: ended the call, which unlocked my phone. So then I

516
00:24:28,680 --> 00:24:31,520
Speaker 1: got to my keypad. I dialed nine one one, and

517
00:24:31,760 --> 00:24:34,480
Speaker 1: I knew that I needed to wait to put my

518
00:24:34,480 --> 00:24:37,040
Speaker 1: phone somewhere else because I didn't want to drop my phone.

519
00:24:37,040 --> 00:24:38,359
Speaker 1: It was black. I didn't want to drop it and

520
00:24:38,400 --> 00:24:40,439
Speaker 1: then it'd be lost in the dark. So I waited

521
00:24:40,520 --> 00:24:43,440
Speaker 1: until I saw the time counting, and so as soon

522
00:24:43,480 --> 00:24:45,520
Speaker 1: as I saw it get to three, I was like, okay,

523
00:24:45,640 --> 00:24:47,639
Speaker 1: that's enough time. I put it my phone on the

524
00:24:47,640 --> 00:24:50,560
Speaker 1: furthest stair that I could reach, and then I tifically

525
00:24:50,560 --> 00:24:53,439
Speaker 1: turned the speaker towards me, and for a minute and

526
00:24:53,560 --> 00:24:58,040
Speaker 1: thirty three seconds, I yelled eight fifty South Robert Street,

527
00:24:58,119 --> 00:25:01,120
Speaker 1: eight fifty South Robert to Street. Didn't say anything other

528
00:25:01,200 --> 00:25:03,880
Speaker 1: than what they needed to know my address, what we're

529
00:25:03,880 --> 00:25:06,520
Speaker 1: all taught to say when we're calling in one. So

530
00:25:06,760 --> 00:25:09,439
Speaker 1: I was doing that. Kaylee had her phone. She was

531
00:25:09,440 --> 00:25:11,879
Speaker 1: telling SII to do the same thing. She called and

532
00:25:11,920 --> 00:25:14,560
Speaker 1: connected to three times. They have almost five minutes of

533
00:25:14,680 --> 00:25:18,040
Speaker 1: us pleading for help. You can hear in Kaylee's calls

534
00:25:18,040 --> 00:25:20,199
Speaker 1: our attacker. You can hear that it's a fight. You

535
00:25:20,240 --> 00:25:22,440
Speaker 1: can hear Kayley, they help us, help us please, he's

536
00:25:22,440 --> 00:25:24,400
Speaker 1: going to kill us. Help us, help us please. Then

537
00:25:24,440 --> 00:25:27,199
Speaker 1: he looks up and he was like, Sirie, like he

538
00:25:27,240 --> 00:25:29,639
Speaker 1: looks upstairs, like we're talking to someone. Oh, he has

539
00:25:29,680 --> 00:25:32,399
Speaker 1: like an idea this Siri. Yeah, And we were both ticked,

540
00:25:32,520 --> 00:25:34,400
Speaker 1: like what the crap. But we didn't know that he'd

541
00:25:34,400 --> 00:25:37,439
Speaker 1: been in prison for fourteen years. Before this, and so

542
00:25:37,480 --> 00:25:40,840
Speaker 1: he didn't know who Siri was. After that, we're fighting, fighting,

543
00:25:40,840 --> 00:25:43,240
Speaker 1: he gets us both in headlocks, so he's using both

544
00:25:43,240 --> 00:25:45,959
Speaker 1: of our heads are in his arms, and he just

545
00:25:46,040 --> 00:25:48,080
Speaker 1: had to look at both of us and he said, damn,

546
00:25:48,200 --> 00:25:49,639
Speaker 1: I didn't think he were going to be this strong.

547
00:25:49,920 --> 00:25:51,919
Speaker 1: And that's another one of those moments where I'm like,

548
00:25:52,000 --> 00:25:54,919
Speaker 1: he's been watching us this whole time. Kayley wasn't fighting anymore,

549
00:25:54,920 --> 00:25:57,560
Speaker 1: and she'd been screaming that an entire time, and it

550
00:25:57,680 --> 00:25:59,960
Speaker 1: was really scary. I'm like, whereas Kaylee. Why isn't she talking?

551
00:26:00,040 --> 00:26:02,399
Speaker 1: I'm saying her name, She's not responding to me. I'm like,

552
00:26:02,440 --> 00:26:05,480
Speaker 1: what is happening? Like where is she? Then my attacker

553
00:26:05,560 --> 00:26:07,480
Speaker 1: realized what I was doing with my phone and he

554
00:26:07,640 --> 00:26:10,920
Speaker 1: said stop. And so you can hear the last word

555
00:26:10,920 --> 00:26:12,720
Speaker 1: in my phone call that nin on one as him

556
00:26:12,760 --> 00:26:15,280
Speaker 1: saying stop, he ends the phone call. And when he

557
00:26:15,400 --> 00:26:17,720
Speaker 1: ended the phone call, my phone fell down the stairs,

558
00:26:17,840 --> 00:26:19,520
Speaker 1: and so there was a little bit of light and

559
00:26:19,560 --> 00:26:22,760
Speaker 1: I could see his hand strangling Kayley up the wall

560
00:26:22,760 --> 00:26:25,040
Speaker 1: that he had just picked her through. I know at

561
00:26:25,080 --> 00:26:27,800
Speaker 1: some point he has a knife that you see Have

562
00:26:27,920 --> 00:26:29,760
Speaker 1: you seen the knife at this point or no, you

563
00:26:29,880 --> 00:26:33,600
Speaker 1: just see him strangling Kayley. No, he's strangling Kayley. I

564
00:26:33,640 --> 00:26:36,320
Speaker 1: thought I saw like his veins, and my description to

565
00:26:36,400 --> 00:26:38,199
Speaker 1: the detectives, I was like, yeah, his veins were so

566
00:26:38,200 --> 00:26:40,439
Speaker 1: big when he was strangling Kayley. His sounds were huge

567
00:26:41,240 --> 00:26:43,199
Speaker 1: all the way around her little neck. And she's my

568
00:26:43,280 --> 00:26:47,680
Speaker 1: little my little sister so hard. I just remember seeing

569
00:26:47,760 --> 00:26:51,920
Speaker 1: him doing that to her, and he was so incredibly angry.

570
00:26:52,119 --> 00:26:54,639
Speaker 1: I think that's angriest I had been all night. And

571
00:26:54,680 --> 00:26:57,800
Speaker 1: I ran back towards Kayley's room because I knew I

572
00:26:57,800 --> 00:27:00,920
Speaker 1: needed to get as much force as possible. I just

573
00:27:01,080 --> 00:27:03,560
Speaker 1: ran as hard as I could into his body, and

574
00:27:03,600 --> 00:27:06,320
Speaker 1: it knocked us into the launcher room. We broke the door.

575
00:27:06,320 --> 00:27:08,320
Speaker 1: We went through the door. We're laying on the launch

576
00:27:08,440 --> 00:27:11,680
Speaker 1: room ground now it's a cement floor in that room,

577
00:27:11,960 --> 00:27:14,560
Speaker 1: and he's on top of me and he's just punching

578
00:27:14,560 --> 00:27:17,880
Speaker 1: me again with both hands, just in the face, repetitively

579
00:27:17,960 --> 00:27:21,040
Speaker 1: just hitting me. And then his right hand wasn't active

580
00:27:21,080 --> 00:27:23,399
Speaker 1: and Kylee still not making noise at this point, so

581
00:27:23,480 --> 00:27:26,320
Speaker 1: I'm laying there like, what where is she? Okay, Like

582
00:27:26,400 --> 00:27:29,200
Speaker 1: what's happening? His right hands no longer active. So then

583
00:27:29,200 --> 00:27:31,280
Speaker 1: I thought, oh, I have all these pencils for my

584
00:27:31,320 --> 00:27:34,040
Speaker 1: new students, my English students, and this is tough war

585
00:27:34,200 --> 00:27:37,160
Speaker 1: like next to me, I'm gonna grab a pencil and

586
00:27:37,440 --> 00:27:39,760
Speaker 1: gauged like his eyes out, and so I reached over

587
00:27:39,800 --> 00:27:42,919
Speaker 1: to grab a pencil. I grab something and I turned

588
00:27:42,920 --> 00:27:45,479
Speaker 1: my hand and I kid you not, it was like

589
00:27:45,520 --> 00:27:48,240
Speaker 1: a flashlight, or I mean it wasn't, but I could

590
00:27:48,359 --> 00:27:51,959
Speaker 1: see his knife so clearly that it's as if there

591
00:27:51,960 --> 00:27:54,439
Speaker 1: were a flashlight shining on it. It was dirty. It

592
00:27:54,520 --> 00:27:57,199
Speaker 1: was a serrated hunting knife, Like how big is that?

593
00:27:57,240 --> 00:28:00,639
Speaker 1: For reference? The blade was six inches long knife and

594
00:28:00,680 --> 00:28:03,920
Speaker 1: I knew it wasn't ours, but that feeling of that

595
00:28:04,000 --> 00:28:07,280
Speaker 1: knife was not meant for me. It's not meant for

596
00:28:07,400 --> 00:28:11,959
Speaker 1: my body. And this isn't somebody here for drug money,

597
00:28:12,080 --> 00:28:15,320
Speaker 1: like he is here for me. And he's saying like

598
00:28:15,720 --> 00:28:17,600
Speaker 1: now he's starting to say I'm gonna kill you. I'm

599
00:28:17,600 --> 00:28:20,679
Speaker 1: going to kill you, and it was terrifying. Then I

600
00:28:20,720 --> 00:28:23,159
Speaker 1: can hear Kaylee say out of the blue say no,

601
00:28:23,200 --> 00:28:25,600
Speaker 1: I'm gonna if can kill you. Where we're like we

602
00:28:25,640 --> 00:28:28,040
Speaker 1: couldn't even say shut up, you know. So it's just

603
00:28:28,200 --> 00:28:31,600
Speaker 1: like like I have four sisters, and I was just

604
00:28:31,640 --> 00:28:34,639
Speaker 1: all about always about being ladylike and polite, and all

605
00:28:34,640 --> 00:28:36,399
Speaker 1: of a sudden, Kaylee saying she's going to eff and

606
00:28:36,480 --> 00:28:38,200
Speaker 1: kill him, and I was like, oh my gosh, ky.

607
00:28:39,120 --> 00:28:40,960
Speaker 1: It was just one of those moments where it was like,

608
00:28:41,040 --> 00:28:44,440
Speaker 1: holy crap, this is real and I'm just kind of

609
00:28:44,480 --> 00:28:46,280
Speaker 1: thinking of like next step, Okay, what do we need

610
00:28:46,320 --> 00:28:48,520
Speaker 1: to do? He has a knife, so I say, Kaylee,

611
00:28:48,560 --> 00:28:51,280
Speaker 1: he has a knife, and she was shook. She's like,

612
00:28:51,320 --> 00:28:53,800
Speaker 1: he has a what I was like, a knife? I

613
00:28:53,880 --> 00:28:56,000
Speaker 1: was like, we need more help. If we don't will die.

614
00:28:56,160 --> 00:28:58,480
Speaker 1: She said, I'm not leaving you. I'm not leaving you,

615
00:28:58,640 --> 00:29:00,800
Speaker 1: and then I told her again and then she said

616
00:29:00,840 --> 00:29:03,880
Speaker 1: I'm not leaving you. And that was the hardest part

617
00:29:03,880 --> 00:29:07,120
Speaker 1: of the night for me because I didn't want Selfishly,

618
00:29:07,440 --> 00:29:10,240
Speaker 1: I didn't want her to leave because she was the fighter.

619
00:29:10,360 --> 00:29:12,680
Speaker 1: She was the angry one, she was the intimidating one

620
00:29:12,680 --> 00:29:14,080
Speaker 1: out of both of us. She was the one that

621
00:29:14,120 --> 00:29:17,280
Speaker 1: was taking no crap, and she was like protecting me.

622
00:29:17,320 --> 00:29:20,200
Speaker 1: And I didn't want her to leave because I knew

623
00:29:20,200 --> 00:29:21,680
Speaker 1: that that was going to be the last time I

624
00:29:21,680 --> 00:29:24,000
Speaker 1: was going to see her. But more than that, I

625
00:29:24,080 --> 00:29:27,760
Speaker 1: didn't want her to see me be brutally murdered and

626
00:29:27,800 --> 00:29:30,480
Speaker 1: then be brutally murdered herself. So I said, please leave,

627
00:29:30,680 --> 00:29:33,640
Speaker 1: you need more help. So she said okay, and that's

628
00:29:33,680 --> 00:29:36,520
Speaker 1: when she left. And so she started running up the stairs.

629
00:29:36,680 --> 00:29:38,280
Speaker 1: When she got to the top of the stairs, she

630
00:29:38,360 --> 00:29:41,840
Speaker 1: turned the light on, and I just remembering her bum

631
00:29:41,960 --> 00:29:44,840
Speaker 1: and her legs. I didn't like get dawn on me

632
00:29:44,920 --> 00:29:46,960
Speaker 1: until later she was like wearing a thong because I

633
00:29:47,000 --> 00:29:48,520
Speaker 1: was like why, because if she came to the hospital,

634
00:29:48,520 --> 00:29:50,400
Speaker 1: I was like, why are you like what happened? But

635
00:29:50,440 --> 00:29:53,040
Speaker 1: I just remember seeing her legs. But that was like,

636
00:29:53,240 --> 00:29:55,640
Speaker 1: I don't know if I'll have another moment like that

637
00:29:55,760 --> 00:29:57,880
Speaker 1: in my life. I hope I don't. But that was

638
00:29:58,400 --> 00:30:02,880
Speaker 1: the loneliest right. You're alone with him now, and you

639
00:30:02,920 --> 00:30:04,440
Speaker 1: need her to go. You need her to stay, but

640
00:30:04,440 --> 00:30:07,640
Speaker 1: you need her to go, and you really though you

641
00:30:08,040 --> 00:30:10,200
Speaker 1: need her to go if there's and that's like a

642
00:30:10,240 --> 00:30:13,960
Speaker 1: game time decision that like just comes out of pure love.

643
00:30:14,480 --> 00:30:17,240
Speaker 1: So she leaves. She was running up the stairs. That's

644
00:30:17,240 --> 00:30:20,320
Speaker 1: when he started stabbing me. So the last thing that

645
00:30:20,360 --> 00:30:23,560
Speaker 1: she heard was he's stabbing me. He's stabbing me, And

646
00:30:23,800 --> 00:30:26,719
Speaker 1: so she leaves. She's running outside. She's pounding on our

647
00:30:26,720 --> 00:30:30,440
Speaker 1: neighbor's door. She's screaming for help. She can see our neighbor, Sandy. Yeah,

648
00:30:30,520 --> 00:30:34,040
Speaker 1: little Sandy sitting in her refiner, not doing anything. I

649
00:30:34,120 --> 00:30:36,560
Speaker 1: remember anytime we would do anything. She was on the

650
00:30:36,560 --> 00:30:38,720
Speaker 1: front of course, ready to talk, ready to chat, and

651
00:30:38,800 --> 00:30:41,160
Speaker 1: she did not move. So Kaylee was like, screw this, Like,

652
00:30:41,160 --> 00:30:42,920
Speaker 1: I don't have time to wait for this lady. Like

653
00:30:42,960 --> 00:30:44,800
Speaker 1: I've got to get help, Like we need to find

654
00:30:44,800 --> 00:30:47,000
Speaker 1: a police like we need We thought that our calls

655
00:30:47,040 --> 00:30:49,040
Speaker 1: were being dispatched. We thought someone was on the way.

656
00:30:49,160 --> 00:30:51,840
Speaker 1: So then she just started running up and down the

657
00:30:51,880 --> 00:30:55,400
Speaker 1: street just screaming so as many people as possible could hear,

658
00:30:55,480 --> 00:30:58,080
Speaker 1: which is a genius thing for her to do. So

659
00:30:58,320 --> 00:31:01,400
Speaker 1: they had eight calls of eight different neighbors calling and

660
00:31:01,520 --> 00:31:05,520
Speaker 1: saying something terrible is happening. Someone said, like, there's a lady.

661
00:31:05,520 --> 00:31:08,760
Speaker 1: I think she's on crack. Someone that's like someone screaming,

662
00:31:08,760 --> 00:31:11,920
Speaker 1: bloody murder. There's something terribly wrong, and I'm too scared

663
00:31:11,920 --> 00:31:14,680
Speaker 1: to go over there. They're getting all these calls. Meanwhile,

664
00:31:14,720 --> 00:31:17,520
Speaker 1: I'm in the basement. He is stabbing me multiple times

665
00:31:17,520 --> 00:31:20,360
Speaker 1: in the abdomen when he started. When he was stabbing me,

666
00:31:20,400 --> 00:31:22,360
Speaker 1: it wasn't just like an in and out type of

667
00:31:22,400 --> 00:31:25,480
Speaker 1: a stab. It was like he was just moving it

668
00:31:25,640 --> 00:31:29,200
Speaker 1: multiple time, just quick little movements, and then he stabbed,

669
00:31:29,280 --> 00:31:31,160
Speaker 1: so he stabbing multiple times in the stomach. Then he

670
00:31:31,200 --> 00:31:33,680
Speaker 1: stabbed me in the leg, and then he stood up

671
00:31:33,800 --> 00:31:36,000
Speaker 1: and he said, now I'm going to get your little sister,

672
00:31:36,240 --> 00:31:39,840
Speaker 1: and he laughed. And that was the last thing I

673
00:31:39,920 --> 00:31:42,400
Speaker 1: was going to let So I jump back up to you.

674
00:31:42,600 --> 00:31:44,920
Speaker 1: You're stabbed right now, and you jump back up, yeah,

675
00:31:44,920 --> 00:31:48,400
Speaker 1: Which I don't know how that adrenaline is that adrenaline

676
00:31:48,680 --> 00:31:50,400
Speaker 1: like are you in pain in that moment? Or you

677
00:31:50,400 --> 00:31:53,240
Speaker 1: don't even feel pain? To be honest, I wouldn't have

678
00:31:53,320 --> 00:31:55,440
Speaker 1: known that he was stabbing me if I didn't see

679
00:31:55,520 --> 00:31:58,400
Speaker 1: his knife, and if I didn't focus on his movements

680
00:31:58,520 --> 00:32:01,120
Speaker 1: and the still like his I wouldn't have known that

681
00:32:01,120 --> 00:32:02,800
Speaker 1: he was stabbing me. When I was on the cement,

682
00:32:02,840 --> 00:32:05,800
Speaker 1: I can remember my leg stinging, but I didn't put

683
00:32:05,800 --> 00:32:07,840
Speaker 1: it together that that's why I get back up. I

684
00:32:07,920 --> 00:32:10,320
Speaker 1: pull him down to the ground, and then we have

685
00:32:10,440 --> 00:32:12,640
Speaker 1: this moment that I usually don't like to talk about

686
00:32:12,720 --> 00:32:16,000
Speaker 1: because I still don't understand it. There's part of me

687
00:32:16,080 --> 00:32:19,160
Speaker 1: that doesn't like it, but I think it's important now

688
00:32:19,200 --> 00:32:22,720
Speaker 1: and my healing. Especially where we're on the ground, we're

689
00:32:22,760 --> 00:32:25,760
Speaker 1: face to face. I can feel my hands are like

690
00:32:26,040 --> 00:32:29,120
Speaker 1: on his upper arms, like underneath his arm. It's kind

691
00:32:29,160 --> 00:32:32,560
Speaker 1: of and I can feel his sweat dripping onto my

692
00:32:32,600 --> 00:32:35,200
Speaker 1: hands from his shoulders. I can feel his warm breath

693
00:32:35,240 --> 00:32:38,680
Speaker 1: on my face. And I'm just saying, let me help

694
00:32:38,720 --> 00:32:41,840
Speaker 1: you just talk for me, Please just talk to me,

695
00:32:41,920 --> 00:32:44,320
Speaker 1: because I thought like if he talked to me, maybe

696
00:32:44,320 --> 00:32:47,240
Speaker 1: he would like me, like maybe he would understand that

697
00:32:47,600 --> 00:32:50,560
Speaker 1: I'm a good person and I don't deserve this, and

698
00:32:50,600 --> 00:32:53,920
Speaker 1: maybe there's something that I could do to help him. No,

699
00:32:54,040 --> 00:32:55,680
Speaker 1: you can get if you can get through to him

700
00:32:55,680 --> 00:32:58,440
Speaker 1: on a human level, like yeah, just try one last time,

701
00:32:59,040 --> 00:33:01,840
Speaker 1: the human level. And he put his head down and

702
00:33:01,880 --> 00:33:05,560
Speaker 1: he said, I'm sorry, and I was like, it's okay,

703
00:33:05,640 --> 00:33:07,480
Speaker 1: it's okay, just talk to me. What do you want.

704
00:33:07,600 --> 00:33:10,600
Speaker 1: Here's my phone, there's my computer. Just take anything. Just

705
00:33:10,840 --> 00:33:12,880
Speaker 1: what do you like? How can I like, just take

706
00:33:12,920 --> 00:33:14,920
Speaker 1: anything you want? But then I was like, Bree, don't

707
00:33:14,960 --> 00:33:18,400
Speaker 1: tell him you take your computer. Your computer's upstairs. Kayley's upstairs.

708
00:33:18,520 --> 00:33:20,880
Speaker 1: And so then I was panicking, like, what the crap

709
00:33:20,880 --> 00:33:22,280
Speaker 1: am I going to tell him to do now? Because

710
00:33:22,520 --> 00:33:24,200
Speaker 1: I was so worried he's going to stand up and

711
00:33:24,200 --> 00:33:26,160
Speaker 1: go get the computer. And then I just had this

712
00:33:26,240 --> 00:33:28,600
Speaker 1: thought like, tell him there's a thousand dollars cash in

713
00:33:28,640 --> 00:33:31,560
Speaker 1: the Nike box in Kayley's closet. And so I told

714
00:33:31,640 --> 00:33:34,080
Speaker 1: him that Kayley had two walking closets in her room

715
00:33:34,360 --> 00:33:38,000
Speaker 1: and she had just purchased like five different pairs of Nike,

716
00:33:38,080 --> 00:33:39,600
Speaker 1: but she didn't tell me because she didn't want me

717
00:33:39,600 --> 00:33:41,360
Speaker 1: to wear them, so she hid them in her closet

718
00:33:41,360 --> 00:33:44,240
Speaker 1: on the top shelf. So he went in and we

719
00:33:44,240 --> 00:33:46,160
Speaker 1: were walking towards her room, and it was just kind

720
00:33:46,200 --> 00:33:49,160
Speaker 1: of like the slow power point in my head of like, Okay,

721
00:33:49,240 --> 00:33:51,680
Speaker 1: he's going to walk into her room, lock her bedroom

722
00:33:51,680 --> 00:33:55,120
Speaker 1: door from the inside, close it, and then he'll have

723
00:33:55,160 --> 00:33:57,360
Speaker 1: to go through like each closet, then go through the

724
00:33:57,400 --> 00:34:00,040
Speaker 1: shoes whatever you know, to find this cash. So he

725
00:34:00,080 --> 00:34:02,600
Speaker 1: goes towards Kayley's room and then all of a sudden,

726
00:34:02,640 --> 00:34:04,880
Speaker 1: he was like, no, I'm gonna if can kill you instead,

727
00:34:04,920 --> 00:34:07,920
Speaker 1: And then he's telling me his plan was to rape

728
00:34:08,000 --> 00:34:10,399
Speaker 1: us and then kill us, but now because we were

729
00:34:10,440 --> 00:34:13,399
Speaker 1: so strong, he was going to kill us and rape

730
00:34:13,440 --> 00:34:16,040
Speaker 1: our dead bodies. So he's telling me he couldn't wait

731
00:34:16,280 --> 00:34:19,120
Speaker 1: to taste me and all these things that it's just

732
00:34:19,280 --> 00:34:23,759
Speaker 1: very vulgar, very intrusive, very gross, especially after what he's

733
00:34:23,760 --> 00:34:26,440
Speaker 1: already done to me. So he changes his mind. He

734
00:34:26,480 --> 00:34:28,640
Speaker 1: picks up a suitcase. He hits me in the face

735
00:34:28,680 --> 00:34:31,040
Speaker 1: with it, and I'm ticked, and then he hits me

736
00:34:31,080 --> 00:34:33,000
Speaker 1: in the stomach and knocks me on the ground. So

737
00:34:33,040 --> 00:34:35,160
Speaker 1: then I'm laying on the suitcase. He gets on top

738
00:34:35,280 --> 00:34:37,360
Speaker 1: of me and he's trying to stab me again and

739
00:34:37,440 --> 00:34:39,959
Speaker 1: he can't, and he was like, why isn't this working?

740
00:34:40,000 --> 00:34:42,040
Speaker 1: Why the ff isn't this working? And I remember saying

741
00:34:42,080 --> 00:34:45,120
Speaker 1: like I don't know, but like don't just shut up,

742
00:34:45,160 --> 00:34:47,760
Speaker 1: you know. And then he's like, fine, I'm gonna stab

743
00:34:47,800 --> 00:34:49,799
Speaker 1: in the head. And then he puts his left hand

744
00:34:49,800 --> 00:34:53,360
Speaker 1: on my forehead, he's holding it against the suitcase, and

745
00:34:53,400 --> 00:34:55,920
Speaker 1: then he reaches his right hand way far above his

746
00:34:56,640 --> 00:34:59,880
Speaker 1: head to come down and stab me, and his knuckle

747
00:35:00,120 --> 00:35:02,480
Speaker 1: just grazed the side of my head like he completely

748
00:35:02,520 --> 00:35:05,720
Speaker 1: met And he did that twice, and there's two holes

749
00:35:05,719 --> 00:35:07,960
Speaker 1: in the suitcase that I still have where he missed.

750
00:35:08,120 --> 00:35:11,000
Speaker 1: So he's getting frustrated that that's not working because he

751
00:35:11,040 --> 00:35:13,359
Speaker 1: picks me up as a knife at my throat. We're

752
00:35:13,400 --> 00:35:16,120
Speaker 1: standing up, my feet are dangling, and I kind of

753
00:35:16,120 --> 00:35:18,560
Speaker 1: gave up. I was so tired at that point. I

754
00:35:18,640 --> 00:35:22,080
Speaker 1: didn't have any energy left, and I just remember saying like, okay,

755
00:35:22,200 --> 00:35:24,480
Speaker 1: you can kill me, just please don't kill my sister.

756
00:35:24,640 --> 00:35:27,279
Speaker 1: Please don't kill my sister. And then I just heard

757
00:35:27,320 --> 00:35:30,160
Speaker 1: something say like keep fighting. You had this just this

758
00:35:30,280 --> 00:35:32,719
Speaker 1: inner voice. You were defeated, and at the same time,

759
00:35:32,800 --> 00:35:36,279
Speaker 1: something just told you keep fighting, just keep fighting, and

760
00:35:36,760 --> 00:35:39,520
Speaker 1: in herself, I don't know, I was just like, keep fighting,

761
00:35:39,840 --> 00:35:43,000
Speaker 1: and so I did. I mean, we talk about rock Bottom,

762
00:35:43,120 --> 00:35:45,120
Speaker 1: you know, like people talk about it and sometimes we

763
00:35:45,200 --> 00:35:48,000
Speaker 1: throw it out, and obviously those who are listening like

764
00:35:48,840 --> 00:35:51,719
Speaker 1: life is hard, and like what happened to me isn't

765
00:35:51,960 --> 00:35:54,640
Speaker 1: harder than what has happened to you, Like we only

766
00:35:54,680 --> 00:35:57,319
Speaker 1: know the heart that we faced, right, And so in

767
00:35:57,360 --> 00:36:00,279
Speaker 1: that moment, though, it was like I was depleted. I

768
00:36:00,360 --> 00:36:03,839
Speaker 1: had nothing left at least I thought, And when I

769
00:36:03,880 --> 00:36:07,600
Speaker 1: heard keep fighting, I'm so glad that I fello that intuition.

770
00:36:07,640 --> 00:36:10,719
Speaker 1: I acted on that intuition because I needed every mill

771
00:36:10,800 --> 00:36:14,080
Speaker 1: a second possible to save me, and so I kicked something.

772
00:36:14,120 --> 00:36:15,680
Speaker 1: I'm not sure what I kicked, but it pushed us

773
00:36:15,680 --> 00:36:18,280
Speaker 1: back into the laundry room. So we're on the ground.

774
00:36:18,400 --> 00:36:20,880
Speaker 1: We're kind of like sitting up against the washer and dryer.

775
00:36:21,160 --> 00:36:24,360
Speaker 1: He puts his legs up and over my legs, squeezes

776
00:36:24,400 --> 00:36:26,680
Speaker 1: them together, and pulls me in closer to his body,

777
00:36:26,920 --> 00:36:28,960
Speaker 1: and then it's like an mma hold. And then he

778
00:36:29,000 --> 00:36:31,799
Speaker 1: puts his other hand up and over my arms, and

779
00:36:31,840 --> 00:36:33,799
Speaker 1: then his knife is at my throat and I can

780
00:36:33,880 --> 00:36:36,640
Speaker 1: feel his soft lips on the back of my ear,

781
00:36:36,920 --> 00:36:39,239
Speaker 1: telling me he's going to kill me, that he's going

782
00:36:39,280 --> 00:36:43,480
Speaker 1: to rape me, just gross things. And then I was

783
00:36:43,520 --> 00:36:45,560
Speaker 1: like trying to pull his arm down with my hands

784
00:36:45,600 --> 00:36:49,120
Speaker 1: from my throat, and right when he flexed to slit

785
00:36:49,239 --> 00:36:52,120
Speaker 1: my throat, I moved my head over just a little bit,

786
00:36:52,239 --> 00:36:54,480
Speaker 1: and I could see the stairs and I saw two

787
00:36:54,520 --> 00:36:57,280
Speaker 1: black shoes coming down the stairs, but I couldn't hear Kaylee,

788
00:36:57,360 --> 00:36:59,560
Speaker 1: and so I thought it was his friend. At first,

789
00:36:59,600 --> 00:37:01,480
Speaker 1: I thought they had killed Kaylee, and I was like,

790
00:37:01,560 --> 00:37:04,440
Speaker 1: you can kill me. I'm not living a life without Kaylee.

791
00:37:04,560 --> 00:37:07,719
Speaker 1: But then I heard the salt lakesidey, please drop the knife.

792
00:37:07,800 --> 00:37:11,640
Speaker 1: So Officer ben home was Originally we were told that

793
00:37:11,719 --> 00:37:13,759
Speaker 1: he was off duty, but that isn't the case. He

794
00:37:13,840 --> 00:37:16,520
Speaker 1: was on duty, but he was responding to a last

795
00:37:16,560 --> 00:37:19,239
Speaker 1: call before he was heading home, a call that was

796
00:37:19,600 --> 00:37:22,520
Speaker 1: thirteen miles I think away from our home, so it

797
00:37:22,560 --> 00:37:25,160
Speaker 1: wasn't anywhere close to our calls. And as he was

798
00:37:25,239 --> 00:37:28,680
Speaker 1: driving three blocks away, he could hear Kaylee screaming, and

799
00:37:28,840 --> 00:37:32,759
Speaker 1: he followed her screams and pulled into our street. She

800
00:37:32,960 --> 00:37:35,640
Speaker 1: thought that he was responding to our calls, so he

801
00:37:35,719 --> 00:37:37,520
Speaker 1: got out of his car. He was like still trying

802
00:37:37,520 --> 00:37:39,560
Speaker 1: to figure out what was going on. He's a canine officer,

803
00:37:39,600 --> 00:37:41,759
Speaker 1: so he went to get his knine, but then he

804
00:37:41,840 --> 00:37:44,320
Speaker 1: thought if I get m canine, it could attack Kaylee

805
00:37:44,400 --> 00:37:47,400
Speaker 1: because she was frantic, and so he didn't get his

806
00:37:47,480 --> 00:37:49,920
Speaker 1: canine and she was like, hurry up, like what are

807
00:37:49,920 --> 00:37:51,600
Speaker 1: you doing? Get inside. He's gonna kill her. He's gonna

808
00:37:51,600 --> 00:37:54,239
Speaker 1: stab her, like go, go go, and without question went

809
00:37:54,280 --> 00:37:58,760
Speaker 1: inside and walked through our living room, dining room, kitchen,

810
00:37:58,840 --> 00:38:01,480
Speaker 1: turned the corner and walked on seventeen stairs. Kayley told

811
00:38:01,520 --> 00:38:04,120
Speaker 1: him that there were seventeen stairs though he could count.

812
00:38:04,160 --> 00:38:05,600
Speaker 1: She told him not to turn a light on. She

813
00:38:05,640 --> 00:38:07,800
Speaker 1: told him to be quiet because he had a knife,

814
00:38:07,800 --> 00:38:10,040
Speaker 1: and she didn't, you know, all the things, so she

815
00:38:10,200 --> 00:38:13,640
Speaker 1: quarterbacked the situation perfectly, led him to our basement, and

816
00:38:13,719 --> 00:38:17,080
Speaker 1: he came right when I needed him very most. He

817
00:38:17,120 --> 00:38:19,600
Speaker 1: gave my attackers three chances to drop the knife. My

818
00:38:19,680 --> 00:38:22,759
Speaker 1: attacker didn't take any of them. Instead, he told Ben

819
00:38:22,800 --> 00:38:24,920
Speaker 1: to step back because he was going to stick me.

820
00:38:25,280 --> 00:38:28,759
Speaker 1: And when he extended his right hand to come dick me,

821
00:38:29,080 --> 00:38:32,160
Speaker 1: his head moved out from behind my head, so our

822
00:38:32,239 --> 00:38:34,759
Speaker 1: cheeks were touching, our noses were about an inch to

823
00:38:34,800 --> 00:38:36,719
Speaker 1: an inch and a half away from each other. And

824
00:38:36,840 --> 00:38:39,680
Speaker 1: Ben took one shot, and that one shot took my

825
00:38:39,719 --> 00:38:42,840
Speaker 1: attacker's life and saved mine. And didn't that moment Do

826
00:38:42,880 --> 00:38:46,000
Speaker 1: you even know that it worked? Yes? But it's loud,

827
00:38:46,040 --> 00:38:48,040
Speaker 1: right or not? It's not loud, very loud. Yeah, And

828
00:38:48,080 --> 00:38:50,439
Speaker 1: I've never like, I'm not around guns, Like, I don't know.

829
00:38:50,680 --> 00:38:52,919
Speaker 1: Are you even sure though you're positive that he's gone

830
00:38:52,920 --> 00:38:55,560
Speaker 1: and you're okay? Immediately I didn't know that I was okay,

831
00:38:55,600 --> 00:38:58,680
Speaker 1: but I mean, by the feeling of the shot, I

832
00:38:58,719 --> 00:39:02,120
Speaker 1: thought his head floated off Okay, so I knew that

833
00:39:02,160 --> 00:39:05,399
Speaker 1: he was. I mean that alone is like a good thing,

834
00:39:05,480 --> 00:39:10,520
Speaker 1: but that's like very sensory intense. No one, including Ben,

835
00:39:10,680 --> 00:39:14,919
Speaker 1: wanted someone to die. To feel someone die is an

836
00:39:14,920 --> 00:39:19,480
Speaker 1: experience that nobody, nobody deserves. But it's tricky too though,

837
00:39:19,520 --> 00:39:22,719
Speaker 1: because it's what I'm most grateful for it as well. Right,

838
00:39:22,960 --> 00:39:26,759
Speaker 1: So I don't know, I still navigating. That was the

839
00:39:26,840 --> 00:39:30,400
Speaker 1: only way for justice in that moment. And just to

840
00:39:30,400 --> 00:39:33,239
Speaker 1: be clear, Ben was not dispatch. Dispatch never came. No,

841
00:39:33,480 --> 00:39:36,120
Speaker 1: they never came. Also, I think it's just really important

842
00:39:36,160 --> 00:39:39,000
Speaker 1: to know that he gave him three chances to not

843
00:39:39,320 --> 00:39:41,839
Speaker 1: be shot, but when he extended his arm to come

844
00:39:41,840 --> 00:39:43,480
Speaker 1: back and kill me, that would have that could have

845
00:39:43,520 --> 00:39:45,839
Speaker 1: been it, and that he had already stabbed me. They're

846
00:39:45,960 --> 00:39:49,040
Speaker 1: actually the stabs that he stabbed me were They're not

847
00:39:49,040 --> 00:39:51,560
Speaker 1: honest prison stabs. They're the stabs that are supposed to

848
00:39:51,600 --> 00:39:53,920
Speaker 1: kill someone the fastest. So he was going from just

849
00:39:54,000 --> 00:39:57,919
Speaker 1: sending ay or to my small intestine and my femoral vein.

850
00:39:58,280 --> 00:40:01,120
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, he knew what he was doing. Luckily Ben

851
00:40:01,200 --> 00:40:03,440
Speaker 1: showed up when he did so when he died, I

852
00:40:03,800 --> 00:40:07,040
Speaker 1: remember the shot, it was like I could see the smoke.

853
00:40:07,239 --> 00:40:10,440
Speaker 1: And this is so random, but I remember seeing the

854
00:40:10,440 --> 00:40:13,520
Speaker 1: movie Swat, which is so weird because I had never

855
00:40:13,520 --> 00:40:15,839
Speaker 1: thought of it ever. But in that moment, I thought,

856
00:40:15,880 --> 00:40:17,440
Speaker 1: oh my gosh, he's gonna have to shoot me like

857
00:40:17,480 --> 00:40:19,239
Speaker 1: that one movie, Like he's gonna have to shoot me

858
00:40:19,280 --> 00:40:21,719
Speaker 1: in the shoulder to shoot him. So he went to

859
00:40:21,760 --> 00:40:23,480
Speaker 1: take the shot. Like as soon as he took it,

860
00:40:23,520 --> 00:40:26,120
Speaker 1: I closed my eyes and kind of flexed because I

861
00:40:26,160 --> 00:40:28,600
Speaker 1: was just like waiting to be shot. And then I wasn't.

862
00:40:29,000 --> 00:40:31,719
Speaker 1: I had my hair like up in a bedtime ponytail,

863
00:40:31,719 --> 00:40:33,960
Speaker 1: and it was like flapping like everywhere. I can remember.

864
00:40:34,000 --> 00:40:36,239
Speaker 1: My hair was like like blew up and then came

865
00:40:36,280 --> 00:40:39,640
Speaker 1: back down. And then it was just a super slow motion.

866
00:40:39,760 --> 00:40:42,960
Speaker 1: I can remember the knife drop and then the weight

867
00:40:43,080 --> 00:40:47,040
Speaker 1: of Burger's dead body instantly instantly, and so I had

868
00:40:47,080 --> 00:40:49,520
Speaker 1: to lift his arm up and then I lifted it

869
00:40:49,600 --> 00:40:52,520
Speaker 1: both of his legs were so heavy, and then dropping

870
00:40:52,560 --> 00:40:55,080
Speaker 1: them and they just like foot like on the ground.

871
00:40:55,280 --> 00:40:57,200
Speaker 1: And then I stood up and I stepped on the

872
00:40:57,239 --> 00:40:59,360
Speaker 1: bullet shelf and when I stepped on it like spun

873
00:40:59,400 --> 00:41:01,680
Speaker 1: out uneath my foot. So I went back to look

874
00:41:01,719 --> 00:41:03,760
Speaker 1: at it. But Ben didn't wanted me to see Burger,

875
00:41:03,920 --> 00:41:06,839
Speaker 1: and so he screamed at me to run upstairs. I

876
00:41:06,840 --> 00:41:09,239
Speaker 1: don't remember this, but he said that I came to

877
00:41:09,320 --> 00:41:11,080
Speaker 1: him with my hands up. I wanted to give him

878
00:41:11,080 --> 00:41:12,600
Speaker 1: a hug, and I was like saying thank you, but

879
00:41:12,680 --> 00:41:15,080
Speaker 1: he was like, do not touch me. YEA a quirky

880
00:41:15,120 --> 00:41:17,800
Speaker 1: thing about me. I'm so weird about my teeth. I

881
00:41:17,800 --> 00:41:20,320
Speaker 1: have like the fear of like chipping a tooth. And

882
00:41:20,680 --> 00:41:23,359
Speaker 1: when I was running, I never skipped stairs when I'm

883
00:41:23,360 --> 00:41:26,480
Speaker 1: walking or running upstairs. And he said that when I

884
00:41:26,560 --> 00:41:28,960
Speaker 1: ran up the stairs. Got no memory of running up

885
00:41:29,000 --> 00:41:31,040
Speaker 1: the stairs. I remember getting up and then I remember

886
00:41:31,040 --> 00:41:34,000
Speaker 1: being upstairs, but he said that I was skipping two

887
00:41:34,040 --> 00:41:37,520
Speaker 1: stairs after being stabbed. Just crazy. So I get to

888
00:41:37,520 --> 00:41:39,480
Speaker 1: the top of the stairs and the only thing I

889
00:41:39,520 --> 00:41:42,320
Speaker 1: care about is Kaylee. I just want to see Kaylee.

890
00:41:42,719 --> 00:41:45,120
Speaker 1: And then I look down. I got to the top

891
00:41:45,160 --> 00:41:47,480
Speaker 1: and I looked down at my body and I saw

892
00:41:48,160 --> 00:41:52,200
Speaker 1: what he had done me, and I was losing so

893
00:41:52,280 --> 00:41:55,359
Speaker 1: much blood just coming out of my body. Like That's

894
00:41:55,400 --> 00:41:57,960
Speaker 1: when I started and started hurting, and I started getting

895
00:41:58,040 --> 00:42:00,120
Speaker 1: light headed, and I looked to the left towards my

896
00:42:00,320 --> 00:42:02,040
Speaker 1: room and I didn't see Kaylee. I look in the kitchen,

897
00:42:02,080 --> 00:42:04,000
Speaker 1: I couldn't see her, and then I turned my head

898
00:42:04,200 --> 00:42:08,920
Speaker 1: to the right. I choose there. I just said, thank you,

899
00:42:09,320 --> 00:42:11,520
Speaker 1: thank you for saving me. Love you, still thinking I

900
00:42:11,560 --> 00:42:14,120
Speaker 1: was going to die? Right right? Right? I mean you're

901
00:42:14,239 --> 00:42:16,560
Speaker 1: you're looking at your body, which was you know, this

902
00:42:16,640 --> 00:42:18,800
Speaker 1: whole fight, by the way, was only six minutes. Is

903
00:42:18,800 --> 00:42:21,879
Speaker 1: that correct? We think? So I sent a text like

904
00:42:21,920 --> 00:42:23,799
Speaker 1: as he was coming in, I was putting my phone down,

905
00:42:23,880 --> 00:42:25,600
Speaker 1: and that was sent at twelve oh one. We don't

906
00:42:25,600 --> 00:42:27,520
Speaker 1: know if it was sent during the fight or right then.

907
00:42:27,840 --> 00:42:30,560
Speaker 1: And then shots fired was called at twelve oh eight.

908
00:42:30,600 --> 00:42:32,600
Speaker 1: So I guess like seven minute, right, And it's a

909
00:42:32,640 --> 00:42:36,879
Speaker 1: lot to pack into seven minutes. Yeah, And what doesn't

910
00:42:36,880 --> 00:42:39,080
Speaker 1: feel like seven minutes right when you play that back? No,

911
00:42:39,320 --> 00:42:41,600
Speaker 1: And even in all of our interviews, I said it

912
00:42:41,760 --> 00:42:43,880
Speaker 1: he was in for forty five minutes, Kaylee said, like

913
00:42:43,960 --> 00:42:46,720
Speaker 1: thirty five to forty minutes, and then who was only

914
00:42:46,719 --> 00:42:50,000
Speaker 1: in our house for eight seconds? That's thirty minutes. Wow,

915
00:42:50,040 --> 00:42:54,080
Speaker 1: that's fascinating, Like that's his memory. Yeah, things move super

916
00:42:54,120 --> 00:42:56,759
Speaker 1: slow when that happens. Do you go to the hospital immediately? No?

917
00:42:57,160 --> 00:42:59,839
Speaker 1: I laid on the porch for about thirty minutes until

918
00:42:59,840 --> 00:43:02,680
Speaker 1: ambulance was finally came. Oh, because an ambulance wasn't coming

919
00:43:02,680 --> 00:43:05,240
Speaker 1: in time, not by choice, none of our calls were dispatched.

920
00:43:05,360 --> 00:43:07,960
Speaker 1: Oh my gosh. So we're laying on the porch. We

921
00:43:07,960 --> 00:43:10,440
Speaker 1: had neighbors for listeners. I think this is really important.

922
00:43:10,520 --> 00:43:14,160
Speaker 1: It's very like, at least in my experience, I wish

923
00:43:14,160 --> 00:43:16,440
Speaker 1: I would have known. But if ever you're in a

924
00:43:16,520 --> 00:43:20,000
Speaker 1: traumatic moment like that, it's very important to make eye

925
00:43:20,000 --> 00:43:23,879
Speaker 1: contact and demands. So we were screaming like call nine

926
00:43:23,920 --> 00:43:26,600
Speaker 1: on one. I remember Kiley's like telling everybody to f

927
00:43:26,760 --> 00:43:29,080
Speaker 1: off and like all these things, and I shoulder being

928
00:43:29,080 --> 00:43:30,959
Speaker 1: like Kiely, what are you doing, like don't be ride

929
00:43:31,000 --> 00:43:32,960
Speaker 1: and she should put her hand over my mouth and

930
00:43:32,960 --> 00:43:34,160
Speaker 1: I was like, don't tell me what to do, like

931
00:43:34,160 --> 00:43:36,560
Speaker 1: we're fighting again. Like she was frustrated because we had

932
00:43:36,560 --> 00:43:39,040
Speaker 1: all these neighbors with their phones recording and no one's

933
00:43:39,080 --> 00:43:41,520
Speaker 1: calling nine on one. And then our neighbor they were

934
00:43:41,520 --> 00:43:44,799
Speaker 1: two EMT students had just graduated, so they had their

935
00:43:44,880 --> 00:43:47,680
Speaker 1: EMT bags. They came over and there are two men.

936
00:43:48,000 --> 00:43:50,560
Speaker 1: They had their gloves on and all four of their

937
00:43:50,560 --> 00:43:54,120
Speaker 1: hands weren't all of my wounds angels. A lot of

938
00:43:54,160 --> 00:43:56,800
Speaker 1: angels on your block, from Ben to your sister, even

939
00:43:56,920 --> 00:44:00,160
Speaker 1: to these two. And honestly, it's my belief that when

940
00:44:00,200 --> 00:44:03,600
Speaker 1: I opened my window there are some divine angels. I

941
00:44:03,640 --> 00:44:06,400
Speaker 1: don't know that came in, because otherwise I don't think

942
00:44:06,440 --> 00:44:09,880
Speaker 1: they'd be here. Yeah, and I'm so glad that you are, obviously.

943
00:44:10,120 --> 00:44:12,719
Speaker 1: And when you go to the hospital, the doctors thought

944
00:44:12,719 --> 00:44:14,360
Speaker 1: that that he had gotten to your a orda, but

945
00:44:14,360 --> 00:44:16,279
Speaker 1: he just missed, right. Yeah. So I get there and

946
00:44:16,320 --> 00:44:18,440
Speaker 1: they're saying, like trauma one, she's not going to make it.

947
00:44:18,480 --> 00:44:21,640
Speaker 1: This is it, like obviously terrifying. And I was in

948
00:44:21,880 --> 00:44:24,400
Speaker 1: so much pain, so much pain. I still didn't have

949
00:44:24,440 --> 00:44:26,319
Speaker 1: any pain medication. I had to wait until I talked

950
00:44:26,360 --> 00:44:29,160
Speaker 1: to a detective to get pain medication. There was like

951
00:44:29,200 --> 00:44:32,799
Speaker 1: sixteen doctors and nurses around, and the main doctor came

952
00:44:32,840 --> 00:44:35,720
Speaker 1: in and I remember him putting these like six fingers

953
00:44:35,760 --> 00:44:38,560
Speaker 1: in my top wound, like moving somewhere around. They took

954
00:44:38,719 --> 00:44:42,160
Speaker 1: three CT scans and an ultrasound and they all came

955
00:44:42,200 --> 00:44:43,880
Speaker 1: back and they were like he missed, and he was

956
00:44:43,880 --> 00:44:46,080
Speaker 1: like there's no way. So he like does this thing

957
00:44:46,080 --> 00:44:48,520
Speaker 1: and sure enough, he missed every vital organ in vain

958
00:44:48,760 --> 00:44:51,040
Speaker 1: and they stitched me up and I went home that night.

959
00:44:51,280 --> 00:44:53,000
Speaker 1: You went home that night? Where did you go? You

960
00:44:53,040 --> 00:44:55,279
Speaker 1: didn't go back to that house every but no, it's

961
00:44:55,360 --> 00:44:58,280
Speaker 1: a good clarification. I went to my parents and Kaylee

962
00:44:58,280 --> 00:45:00,520
Speaker 1: did she Did she need any doctors or no. That's

963
00:45:00,560 --> 00:45:03,600
Speaker 1: another frustrating thing of our story is we told them

964
00:45:03,640 --> 00:45:05,400
Speaker 1: that we had just gotten beat up, that she had

965
00:45:05,400 --> 00:45:08,120
Speaker 1: gotten kicked downstairs, she had a concussion, and they didn't

966
00:45:08,120 --> 00:45:10,239
Speaker 1: take her to the hospital. In fact, they made her

967
00:45:10,280 --> 00:45:12,799
Speaker 1: stay in the house with his dead body, that room

968
00:45:12,840 --> 00:45:16,560
Speaker 1: full of strangers and investigators believe to tell the story,

969
00:45:16,640 --> 00:45:18,960
Speaker 1: to tell what happened. Yeah, which I which I understand.

970
00:45:19,000 --> 00:45:21,760
Speaker 1: But at the same time, I think she deserves medical attention,

971
00:45:22,000 --> 00:45:25,680
Speaker 1: medical and emotional attension. I mean, like, like that's you

972
00:45:25,719 --> 00:45:27,279
Speaker 1: know I get, and even for yourself too, I mean,

973
00:45:27,280 --> 00:45:28,920
Speaker 1: you didn't get pain medication because you have to tell

974
00:45:28,960 --> 00:45:31,279
Speaker 1: your story. I'm sure there's good reason for these things

975
00:45:31,320 --> 00:45:34,480
Speaker 1: that police offers her too, Like you just needed that,

976
00:45:34,760 --> 00:45:37,200
Speaker 1: I mean that trauma. There just needs to be more

977
00:45:37,200 --> 00:45:41,200
Speaker 1: attention on that. Obviously, that six minutes changed your life.

978
00:45:41,320 --> 00:45:43,880
Speaker 1: And now that we kind of heard that just immediately

979
00:45:43,880 --> 00:45:46,360
Speaker 1: off the bat. What's one word you use to describe

980
00:45:46,400 --> 00:45:51,320
Speaker 1: Bree Now, Honestly, my first thought was a mess, okay,

981
00:45:52,000 --> 00:45:55,920
Speaker 1: but my follow up was brave, brave mess. I like

982
00:45:56,000 --> 00:45:59,120
Speaker 1: that together. Actually, I mean, you can't not be a

983
00:45:59,239 --> 00:46:02,880
Speaker 1: quote unquote mess after that, because I would imagine you

984
00:46:02,960 --> 00:46:06,360
Speaker 1: can't distinguish what you call in your post that I

985
00:46:06,440 --> 00:46:09,640
Speaker 1: learned so much from fear versus danger. You can't tell

986
00:46:09,719 --> 00:46:13,640
Speaker 1: what is about to hurt you versus what is just

987
00:46:13,880 --> 00:46:17,160
Speaker 1: will this hurt me? Yeah, every moment that might translate

988
00:46:17,200 --> 00:46:19,560
Speaker 1: to a quote unquote mess, but that mess is also

989
00:46:19,640 --> 00:46:23,680
Speaker 1: what protects you waking up every day and choosing to

990
00:46:24,000 --> 00:46:25,480
Speaker 1: not just do what you do because I think even

991
00:46:25,520 --> 00:46:27,160
Speaker 1: if you didn't do what you do, which is helping

992
00:46:27,160 --> 00:46:29,200
Speaker 1: other you know, girls learn to fight, which we'll talk

993
00:46:29,239 --> 00:46:31,439
Speaker 1: about that in just a moment, Like you're still getting

994
00:46:31,440 --> 00:46:34,440
Speaker 1: out of bed every morning. And I think that there's

995
00:46:34,520 --> 00:46:39,000
Speaker 1: so much that people don't realize about the weeks, the months,

996
00:46:39,000 --> 00:46:42,480
Speaker 1: the years after that, that that's your true fight, Your

997
00:46:42,480 --> 00:46:45,880
Speaker 1: true fight is now. Yeah, honestly, I think this last

998
00:46:46,000 --> 00:46:49,560
Speaker 1: year and a half has been the hardest host fight

999
00:46:49,760 --> 00:46:52,279
Speaker 1: since my attemption. Marketer, I think there's a lot that

1000
00:46:52,320 --> 00:46:55,480
Speaker 1: comes into play. I think the first six months I

1001
00:46:55,520 --> 00:46:57,880
Speaker 1: was in shock. I don't remember a lot of the

1002
00:46:57,920 --> 00:47:01,400
Speaker 1: first six months. Obviously, age is hard, I think for

1003
00:47:01,440 --> 00:47:05,560
Speaker 1: everyone in one form or another. But forced unexpected change

1004
00:47:05,800 --> 00:47:09,040
Speaker 1: on top of like caused by trauma is just a

1005
00:47:09,120 --> 00:47:13,200
Speaker 1: whole new, unknown world. I had no experience with any

1006
00:47:13,200 --> 00:47:15,440
Speaker 1: of it. I got home thinking like I would go

1007
00:47:15,480 --> 00:47:17,759
Speaker 1: back to work on Monday and life would get back

1008
00:47:17,840 --> 00:47:21,279
Speaker 1: to quote unquote normal whatever from is Kaylee did go

1009
00:47:21,320 --> 00:47:24,720
Speaker 1: back to work that Monday, and she has sailed totally

1010
00:47:24,800 --> 00:47:28,120
Speaker 1: differently than I have, and that great, that's her healing journey.

1011
00:47:28,239 --> 00:47:31,040
Speaker 1: But I, for a long time I compared myself and

1012
00:47:31,080 --> 00:47:33,319
Speaker 1: that's her story to tell, and so I obviously won't

1013
00:47:33,719 --> 00:47:35,560
Speaker 1: for a long time. For me, it was hard because

1014
00:47:35,560 --> 00:47:38,000
Speaker 1: I was like why what is wrong with me? Like

1015
00:47:38,040 --> 00:47:40,640
Speaker 1: why can't I go back to work? Why can't I

1016
00:47:40,680 --> 00:47:43,719
Speaker 1: sleep in a bedroom? Why can't I go and get

1017
00:47:43,719 --> 00:47:48,759
Speaker 1: the mail? With being scared? My whole independent adventure see king,

1018
00:47:48,840 --> 00:47:54,840
Speaker 1: spontaneous life just crashed into this life of fear and anxiety,

1019
00:47:55,000 --> 00:47:58,720
Speaker 1: and I just wanted to be protected. I didn't want anything.

1020
00:47:58,760 --> 00:48:00,960
Speaker 1: I didn't want anything from the I rolled around me.

1021
00:48:01,239 --> 00:48:04,440
Speaker 1: I just wanted to be safe, and also from going

1022
00:48:04,480 --> 00:48:08,040
Speaker 1: to meeting new people and new cultures and that bringing

1023
00:48:08,040 --> 00:48:11,759
Speaker 1: in so much light. I was scared of people. I

1024
00:48:11,840 --> 00:48:14,400
Speaker 1: was scared of people I didn't know and I didn't trust,

1025
00:48:14,480 --> 00:48:17,879
Speaker 1: and the unexpected and all of it. And it just

1026
00:48:18,280 --> 00:48:22,080
Speaker 1: every teeny little aspect of my life completely changed. The

1027
00:48:22,120 --> 00:48:25,360
Speaker 1: approach to my life changed, so much of it changed,

1028
00:48:25,880 --> 00:48:28,520
Speaker 1: and for a long time I thought it changed for

1029
00:48:28,560 --> 00:48:31,799
Speaker 1: the worst, and I thought that my life wasn't one

1030
00:48:32,120 --> 00:48:36,359
Speaker 1: I wanted to live anymore. I don't really talk about this,

1031
00:48:36,440 --> 00:48:39,960
Speaker 1: but I feel safe here. I am so incredibly lucky

1032
00:48:40,280 --> 00:48:44,040
Speaker 1: that I survived, because so many don't. And that's what

1033
00:48:44,160 --> 00:48:48,120
Speaker 1: fuels me to tell my story is obviously to help me,

1034
00:48:48,280 --> 00:48:51,440
Speaker 1: but there's part of me that wants to honor those

1035
00:48:51,520 --> 00:48:54,360
Speaker 1: who don't live and those who don't make it because

1036
00:48:54,680 --> 00:48:57,719
Speaker 1: they can no longer like stand up for themselves. There

1037
00:48:57,880 --> 00:49:01,400
Speaker 1: was a long time, and there's still moment. There was

1038
00:49:01,440 --> 00:49:05,080
Speaker 1: a very long dark time in my life where I

1039
00:49:05,120 --> 00:49:10,880
Speaker 1: would beg God, higher power, anything, just why didn't you

1040
00:49:10,960 --> 00:49:13,960
Speaker 1: just let him kill me? But would have been and

1041
00:49:14,080 --> 00:49:16,840
Speaker 1: I don't mean this disrespectfully to the people who have

1042
00:49:17,080 --> 00:49:19,799
Speaker 1: died but in those moments, it just seems like it

1043
00:49:19,800 --> 00:49:22,600
Speaker 1: would have been a lot easier just to not be

1044
00:49:22,680 --> 00:49:24,480
Speaker 1: here anymore. But when you get on stage and you

1045
00:49:24,520 --> 00:49:26,239
Speaker 1: tell your story or to the listener, you know, they

1046
00:49:26,280 --> 00:49:28,440
Speaker 1: tell your story, is like okay, there's this event and

1047
00:49:28,440 --> 00:49:31,400
Speaker 1: then it happened and it's over. And then like you know,

1048
00:49:31,440 --> 00:49:33,880
Speaker 1: you walk off stage and they tell your story of

1049
00:49:33,920 --> 00:49:37,640
Speaker 1: that six minutes or who knows how long really, then

1050
00:49:37,760 --> 00:49:41,640
Speaker 1: you're left afterwards with the aftershock of I mean, you

1051
00:49:41,680 --> 00:49:44,279
Speaker 1: never even got to say goodbye to you know, spontaneous

1052
00:49:44,360 --> 00:49:46,640
Speaker 1: Bree and that life you never wanted her to leave,

1053
00:49:46,840 --> 00:49:49,120
Speaker 1: and all of a sudden, like you're a new person

1054
00:49:49,239 --> 00:49:53,080
Speaker 1: with a completely different nervous system. The nervous system is

1055
00:49:53,120 --> 00:49:56,520
Speaker 1: what goes into fight or flight and protects us. And

1056
00:49:56,840 --> 00:49:58,800
Speaker 1: now you have a nervous system that you know, a

1057
00:49:58,880 --> 00:50:00,960
Speaker 1: fly is on your shoulder making this up. You didn't

1058
00:50:00,960 --> 00:50:02,600
Speaker 1: say that, but you're a timid of it. I mean

1059
00:50:02,640 --> 00:50:06,920
Speaker 1: I'm exaggerating, yeah, but not really right. So does it

1060
00:50:06,960 --> 00:50:10,600
Speaker 1: feel like you're like living in a body that's not yours? Oh? Yeah,

1061
00:50:10,640 --> 00:50:13,680
Speaker 1: for a long time. And that's why that day before

1062
00:50:13,680 --> 00:50:16,120
Speaker 1: my attack, when I called my mom, like I'm finally

1063
00:50:16,320 --> 00:50:19,120
Speaker 1: where I've worked so hard to be. I didn't even

1064
00:50:19,400 --> 00:50:22,400
Speaker 1: know that person like that was so far gone to

1065
00:50:22,480 --> 00:50:24,880
Speaker 1: me for so long, I couldn't even fathom getting in

1066
00:50:24,880 --> 00:50:27,240
Speaker 1: my car by myself. What I want people to understand,

1067
00:50:27,239 --> 00:50:30,479
Speaker 1: and what I imagine is that despite now being five

1068
00:50:30,560 --> 00:50:32,840
Speaker 1: years out, and I think the longer it goes, the

1069
00:50:32,880 --> 00:50:35,640
Speaker 1: easier people expected to get Like, that's not the case, right, Like,

1070
00:50:35,640 --> 00:50:39,720
Speaker 1: the triggers are there every day in surprising and unsurprising places,

1071
00:50:40,040 --> 00:50:43,440
Speaker 1: and you have to get through those every step of

1072
00:50:43,480 --> 00:50:46,920
Speaker 1: the way for your passion and purpose, which has become

1073
00:50:47,200 --> 00:50:51,560
Speaker 1: to tell your story to help other girls learn to fight. Right. Yeah, Actually,

1074
00:50:51,640 --> 00:50:54,200
Speaker 1: one of your posts, well a lot of your posts,

1075
00:50:54,320 --> 00:50:57,040
Speaker 1: I can't remember the specific one, but you talked about

1076
00:50:57,040 --> 00:51:00,160
Speaker 1: the importance of boundaries, and this was like right after

1077
00:51:00,280 --> 00:51:04,080
Speaker 1: we had met, and I remember thinking, what is a boundary?

1078
00:51:04,160 --> 00:51:06,440
Speaker 1: And these at this time, I the first year and

1079
00:51:06,480 --> 00:51:09,279
Speaker 1: a half after my attack, I did one hundred and

1080
00:51:09,280 --> 00:51:12,439
Speaker 1: like eighty something speaking engagements. I was doing them all

1081
00:51:12,440 --> 00:51:14,560
Speaker 1: the time, full time job. I wasn't doing my English

1082
00:51:14,560 --> 00:51:17,400
Speaker 1: business anymore. I was letting this what happened to me

1083
00:51:17,600 --> 00:51:20,600
Speaker 1: completely one hundred percent to find me. I didn't feel

1084
00:51:20,640 --> 00:51:22,879
Speaker 1: like I could say no to people. I was trying

1085
00:51:22,880 --> 00:51:25,640
Speaker 1: to people please. And it's almost weird because you go

1086
00:51:25,800 --> 00:51:27,600
Speaker 1: and you tell. I mean, it's a terrible thing, like

1087
00:51:27,719 --> 00:51:30,359
Speaker 1: telling the story, but you get like I felt seen

1088
00:51:30,640 --> 00:51:35,080
Speaker 1: almost and I wanted people just to see me for Bree,

1089
00:51:35,120 --> 00:51:37,319
Speaker 1: but they weren't like seeing me for Bree. I don't know,

1090
00:51:37,360 --> 00:51:40,360
Speaker 1: I just so I just got into this like speaking mode,

1091
00:51:40,800 --> 00:51:45,640
Speaker 1: and it was like silently destroying me because I was

1092
00:51:45,719 --> 00:51:49,200
Speaker 1: giving so much and I had nothing left to give.

1093
00:51:49,360 --> 00:51:51,840
Speaker 1: I remember being in Arizona like a year and a

1094
00:51:51,920 --> 00:51:54,680
Speaker 1: half after speaking. It was the second one I did

1095
00:51:54,680 --> 00:51:57,480
Speaker 1: in one day. I had just flown from another place

1096
00:51:57,520 --> 00:52:00,560
Speaker 1: from speaking. I was so tired, I had a cold,

1097
00:52:00,680 --> 00:52:03,600
Speaker 1: and I was just standing there like this sucks. And

1098
00:52:03,800 --> 00:52:05,279
Speaker 1: that was a right around the time I found your

1099
00:52:05,280 --> 00:52:08,440
Speaker 1: boundary post, and that was like, okay, I have got

1100
00:52:08,480 --> 00:52:12,160
Speaker 1: to start making boundaries. I have got to help myself

1101
00:52:12,200 --> 00:52:14,839
Speaker 1: before I can help others, right, And so as soon

1102
00:52:14,880 --> 00:52:17,200
Speaker 1: as I put those boundaries in place, that's really when

1103
00:52:17,200 --> 00:52:20,160
Speaker 1: my healing started. And so I mean even for this call,

1104
00:52:20,280 --> 00:52:22,120
Speaker 1: you know, we we scheduled it and then you went

1105
00:52:22,160 --> 00:52:24,320
Speaker 1: offline for like I think a week or so and

1106
00:52:24,440 --> 00:52:27,440
Speaker 1: you were like, I just need some time to go offline.

1107
00:52:27,440 --> 00:52:29,000
Speaker 1: And I was like, I love that she's doing that.

1108
00:52:29,080 --> 00:52:31,080
Speaker 1: Didn't know that, you know, this is sort of a

1109
00:52:31,080 --> 00:52:33,239
Speaker 1: new thing that you've learned. But I think that's good

1110
00:52:33,239 --> 00:52:36,520
Speaker 1: for people to hear too. Is whatever your level of

1111
00:52:36,600 --> 00:52:39,839
Speaker 1: trauma is, whatever your level of emotional processing, whether it's

1112
00:52:39,880 --> 00:52:44,520
Speaker 1: just surviving COVID even you know, take time and boundaries

1113
00:52:44,560 --> 00:52:49,080
Speaker 1: to go offline and not just say yes to everything,

1114
00:52:49,160 --> 00:52:51,400
Speaker 1: do what you need to for you. That's really exactly

1115
00:52:51,480 --> 00:52:54,080
Speaker 1: that's really the key. So you start fight like girls.

1116
00:52:54,200 --> 00:52:56,200
Speaker 1: Tell us about fight like girls. Yeah, so I originally

1117
00:52:56,239 --> 00:52:58,920
Speaker 1: started fight like girls. We're talking to detectives and he

1118
00:52:59,120 --> 00:53:01,520
Speaker 1: said he's had something that just stuck with me. He

1119
00:53:01,640 --> 00:53:04,200
Speaker 1: was like, if only all girls would fight like you girls.

1120
00:53:04,400 --> 00:53:06,239
Speaker 1: So when he said that, I was like, oh, by

1121
00:53:06,320 --> 00:53:09,520
Speaker 1: like girls. And then I met Elizabeth Smart. We were

1122
00:53:09,520 --> 00:53:12,920
Speaker 1: connected and she invited me to be a part of

1123
00:53:12,960 --> 00:53:15,080
Speaker 1: her book. So she was interviewing me, and then she

1124
00:53:15,160 --> 00:53:17,680
Speaker 1: mentioned something about speaking and how she spoke and if

1125
00:53:17,800 --> 00:53:20,720
Speaker 1: I ever had an event that she would be happy

1126
00:53:20,760 --> 00:53:22,719
Speaker 1: to speak at, and so I was like, okay, Like

1127
00:53:23,000 --> 00:53:26,000
Speaker 1: entrepreneur Bree is like, oh cool, I'm going to create

1128
00:53:26,040 --> 00:53:27,800
Speaker 1: a company and she can come and speak at an event.

1129
00:53:27,880 --> 00:53:29,880
Speaker 1: And so that night I went home and I started

1130
00:53:29,880 --> 00:53:31,719
Speaker 1: to fight like Girls as a way for both of

1131
00:53:31,800 --> 00:53:34,040
Speaker 1: us to share our stories to help people women and

1132
00:53:34,080 --> 00:53:36,320
Speaker 1: girls in the community, and we did and it just

1133
00:53:36,480 --> 00:53:39,000
Speaker 1: kind of grew from there. But even as it was growing,

1134
00:53:39,320 --> 00:53:42,520
Speaker 1: my entrepreneur herself was like, I didn't really pursue it

1135
00:53:42,800 --> 00:53:46,920
Speaker 1: from a business perspective because I wasn't ready mentally or emotionally.

1136
00:53:47,040 --> 00:53:49,200
Speaker 1: So it has just served as a platform for me

1137
00:53:49,280 --> 00:53:51,120
Speaker 1: to tell parts of my story when I want to

1138
00:53:51,120 --> 00:53:54,600
Speaker 1: share it, and then it wasn't until recently I have

1139
00:53:54,760 --> 00:53:58,560
Speaker 1: decided to turn it into an actual business with resources

1140
00:53:58,600 --> 00:54:01,000
Speaker 1: that I've gathered for the last five years that have

1141
00:54:01,120 --> 00:54:05,840
Speaker 1: helped me keep fighting mentally, emotionally, spiritually, and physically to

1142
00:54:06,040 --> 00:54:08,239
Speaker 1: give to other girls who are looking for help. And

1143
00:54:08,440 --> 00:54:12,799
Speaker 1: those resources stem from different self defense classes that I've

1144
00:54:12,840 --> 00:54:17,360
Speaker 1: taken and certified in, to things like breath work or

1145
00:54:17,400 --> 00:54:19,879
Speaker 1: whatever it is that have helped me because so much

1146
00:54:19,960 --> 00:54:23,120
Speaker 1: of my fight, way more than the physical fight, has

1147
00:54:23,160 --> 00:54:26,520
Speaker 1: been the emotional and mental fight. And I think that

1148
00:54:26,520 --> 00:54:29,719
Speaker 1: that's kind of my focus moving forward, is to change

1149
00:54:29,760 --> 00:54:33,240
Speaker 1: the definition and the conversation of and around self defense

1150
00:54:33,280 --> 00:54:35,399
Speaker 1: and how it's practiced. One of the things that I'm

1151
00:54:35,400 --> 00:54:38,960
Speaker 1: really passionate about is having like this level of intimacy

1152
00:54:39,080 --> 00:54:41,920
Speaker 1: broken between people, and so when people hear your story,

1153
00:54:41,920 --> 00:54:43,880
Speaker 1: they might be afraid to ask you things, which there

1154
00:54:43,920 --> 00:54:46,680
Speaker 1: should be caution always when talking to somebody with trauma.

1155
00:54:46,760 --> 00:54:49,960
Speaker 1: But I've heard you say that, like people were very

1156
00:54:50,040 --> 00:54:52,480
Speaker 1: quick to ask you, how are your wounds healing? Do

1157
00:54:52,560 --> 00:54:57,720
Speaker 1: you have scars? But nobody said how are you emotionally? Yeah,

1158
00:54:57,760 --> 00:55:00,400
Speaker 1: for a long time, or I mean maybe till you

1159
00:55:00,440 --> 00:55:03,759
Speaker 1: open that door for people, for you, you know, to

1160
00:55:03,800 --> 00:55:06,080
Speaker 1: go on stage now and say, Okay, my fight wasn't

1161
00:55:06,160 --> 00:55:09,160
Speaker 1: isn't just that six minutes with Burger, My fight is

1162
00:55:09,160 --> 00:55:11,600
Speaker 1: waking up every day. I think depression was kind of

1163
00:55:11,600 --> 00:55:14,160
Speaker 1: a foreign concept to you, And anytime I've heard you

1164
00:55:14,200 --> 00:55:16,080
Speaker 1: talk about this, it kind of feels like you're like

1165
00:55:16,120 --> 00:55:18,560
Speaker 1: afraid to take up space and depression, Like you're not

1166
00:55:18,600 --> 00:55:21,480
Speaker 1: allowed to be depressed because you survived. Or does that

1167
00:55:21,520 --> 00:55:23,440
Speaker 1: feel right, because that's what I hear when you talk

1168
00:55:23,480 --> 00:55:26,600
Speaker 1: about depression. Yeah, it's that's so interesting that you say that,

1169
00:55:26,640 --> 00:55:29,080
Speaker 1: because I've struggled with that so much. I think that

1170
00:55:29,239 --> 00:55:31,759
Speaker 1: it's hard for me in the victim world because there

1171
00:55:31,800 --> 00:55:34,799
Speaker 1: are so many again who don't make it, or for

1172
00:55:34,840 --> 00:55:37,600
Speaker 1: like myself. I'm like, you need to be grateful, or

1173
00:55:37,680 --> 00:55:39,880
Speaker 1: you need to be positive or all these things, and

1174
00:55:39,920 --> 00:55:43,920
Speaker 1: I'm like, you actually don't, right, I can be grateful

1175
00:55:44,239 --> 00:55:48,160
Speaker 1: and depressed. I can be and it's okay and if

1176
00:55:48,200 --> 00:55:50,840
Speaker 1: I don't recognize that and start working on it. And

1177
00:55:50,880 --> 00:55:53,680
Speaker 1: I love that you said said grateful, because I think

1178
00:55:53,760 --> 00:55:56,680
Speaker 1: gratitude like keeps our heart open. This morning, you know,

1179
00:55:56,800 --> 00:55:58,960
Speaker 1: I since you like my dances, I was having a

1180
00:55:59,000 --> 00:56:01,239
Speaker 1: little bit of a so excited for our call, but

1181
00:56:01,280 --> 00:56:03,799
Speaker 1: there was so excited that's a funny word too, But

1182
00:56:04,120 --> 00:56:06,320
Speaker 1: I was looking forward to speaking to you so much,

1183
00:56:06,400 --> 00:56:10,160
Speaker 1: but my mind was being consumed with some doubt, some worries,

1184
00:56:10,200 --> 00:56:13,560
Speaker 1: and I just kept like think like doing a grateful

1185
00:56:13,600 --> 00:56:16,080
Speaker 1: dance and just saying like, I'm grateful. But I also

1186
00:56:16,120 --> 00:56:18,480
Speaker 1: have feelings. And I think that sometimes when we talk

1187
00:56:18,520 --> 00:56:21,799
Speaker 1: about positivity, we think that it needs to displace the

1188
00:56:21,880 --> 00:56:24,520
Speaker 1: other feelings, but it's not. It's just there to keep

1189
00:56:24,520 --> 00:56:28,320
Speaker 1: our heart open enough so that we can allow space

1190
00:56:28,680 --> 00:56:32,400
Speaker 1: for the I wouldn't call them uglier emotions, but what

1191
00:56:32,440 --> 00:56:35,880
Speaker 1: the world has told us are uglier emotions. Yeah, and

1192
00:56:36,040 --> 00:56:38,279
Speaker 1: I'm you know, I've never been a victim like you,

1193
00:56:38,360 --> 00:56:40,600
Speaker 1: but like victims like I feel like you get on

1194
00:56:40,680 --> 00:56:43,279
Speaker 1: stage for that one hundred and eighty times and everybody's

1195
00:56:43,280 --> 00:56:46,120
Speaker 1: applauding you for your strength, and then like, you know,

1196
00:56:46,200 --> 00:56:48,560
Speaker 1: the wounds are healing and the scars are going away

1197
00:56:48,640 --> 00:56:51,760
Speaker 1: or the scabs, and then like nobody knows what's really

1198
00:56:51,800 --> 00:56:53,799
Speaker 1: going on underneath except for like I need to be

1199
00:56:53,840 --> 00:56:56,280
Speaker 1: this face of strength. Yeah, And for a long time

1200
00:56:56,320 --> 00:56:59,160
Speaker 1: I almost felt hypocritical, like, oh, here I am on

1201
00:56:59,200 --> 00:57:01,799
Speaker 1: these stage like pumping girls up to physically fight back

1202
00:57:01,800 --> 00:57:03,759
Speaker 1: and like telling them that part of my story that

1203
00:57:03,760 --> 00:57:06,359
Speaker 1: people are most interested and they're paying me for. It's

1204
00:57:06,400 --> 00:57:09,000
Speaker 1: like there's like a value of that part of my story.

1205
00:57:09,280 --> 00:57:10,920
Speaker 1: But it just feels like in the world, there's not

1206
00:57:11,000 --> 00:57:13,160
Speaker 1: a value to the other part of my story, which

1207
00:57:13,239 --> 00:57:15,719
Speaker 1: is in a way, it's so much harder, and it's

1208
00:57:16,000 --> 00:57:20,000
Speaker 1: it's definitely longer, and it's definitely taken me way longer

1209
00:57:20,040 --> 00:57:23,320
Speaker 1: to navigate and to have an energy to keep fighting

1210
00:57:23,800 --> 00:57:26,320
Speaker 1: than it did in those six minutes on the outside.

1211
00:57:26,480 --> 00:57:29,880
Speaker 1: You know, your trauma was physical, but while he didn't

1212
00:57:29,880 --> 00:57:33,240
Speaker 1: get to you sexually. That has to be violating for

1213
00:57:33,280 --> 00:57:36,760
Speaker 1: a man to be touching you even in fight or

1214
00:57:36,760 --> 00:57:38,680
Speaker 1: then in the moments where he had his arms, like

1215
00:57:38,720 --> 00:57:41,120
Speaker 1: to feel another human's body. You know before that you

1216
00:57:41,160 --> 00:57:44,240
Speaker 1: were going on dates. Now, like dating must be very

1217
00:57:44,280 --> 00:57:46,560
Speaker 1: hard too, and if there is a dating for you

1218
00:57:46,680 --> 00:57:49,600
Speaker 1: right now, within the future, but it's all these things

1219
00:57:49,600 --> 00:57:53,680
Speaker 1: that people don't think about because they see you as strong,

1220
00:57:53,760 --> 00:57:55,480
Speaker 1: and you want to be seen as strong because you

1221
00:57:55,480 --> 00:57:57,240
Speaker 1: want to help them. You would mention that when you

1222
00:57:57,280 --> 00:58:00,320
Speaker 1: started talking about depression, lines were out the door. Yeah,

1223
00:58:00,360 --> 00:58:03,000
Speaker 1: and I think that that's important to validate yourself. Is

1224
00:58:03,000 --> 00:58:06,040
Speaker 1: like your story of that six minutes is important, but

1225
00:58:06,120 --> 00:58:08,760
Speaker 1: even more important maybe is the fight that you're fighting

1226
00:58:08,800 --> 00:58:11,720
Speaker 1: every day. There's a lot of women, unfortunately, who can

1227
00:58:11,800 --> 00:58:14,040
Speaker 1: relate to my six minutes. There's a lot of women

1228
00:58:14,280 --> 00:58:17,280
Speaker 1: who aren't here that could have related that relate to

1229
00:58:17,320 --> 00:58:21,440
Speaker 1: my six minutes. But there are men, women, boys, girls,

1230
00:58:21,840 --> 00:58:25,080
Speaker 1: everyone across the board relates to my fight after my

1231
00:58:25,120 --> 00:58:27,919
Speaker 1: six minutes, and that's where we connect. I think that's

1232
00:58:27,920 --> 00:58:30,320
Speaker 1: where when we're at a rock bottoms, when I started

1233
00:58:30,400 --> 00:58:34,360
Speaker 1: opening up about my depression, my anxiety, my fear, my

1234
00:58:34,480 --> 00:58:36,720
Speaker 1: low self esteem. There was this man who didn't know

1235
00:58:36,800 --> 00:58:40,080
Speaker 1: my name, he knew nothing about me, and he wanted

1236
00:58:40,280 --> 00:58:44,040
Speaker 1: me dead. I was worthless to him, and that feeling

1237
00:58:44,560 --> 00:58:48,520
Speaker 1: is so hard and also so lonely. And I think

1238
00:58:48,520 --> 00:58:52,000
Speaker 1: that no matter what takes somebody to their rock bottom,

1239
00:58:52,200 --> 00:58:54,800
Speaker 1: what takes you to yours will be different than what

1240
00:58:54,960 --> 00:58:57,120
Speaker 1: has taken me to mind. And by the way, I

1241
00:58:57,200 --> 00:59:00,360
Speaker 1: believe that they are more than one. But we get there,

1242
00:59:00,360 --> 00:59:03,040
Speaker 1: and once we're there, when we share and when we're

1243
00:59:03,080 --> 00:59:07,080
Speaker 1: open and willing to talk about our just willing to listen,

1244
00:59:07,400 --> 00:59:09,880
Speaker 1: then that's where we connect and that's where we can

1245
00:59:09,960 --> 00:59:13,760
Speaker 1: find hope to keep fighting exactly. And I actually wanted

1246
00:59:13,800 --> 00:59:16,680
Speaker 1: to name this podcast rock Bottom, but first of all,

1247
00:59:16,680 --> 00:59:21,160
Speaker 1: it's taken, but I mean to your point. You know,

1248
00:59:21,280 --> 00:59:24,120
Speaker 1: the reason I wanted to call it rock bottom was

1249
00:59:24,200 --> 00:59:26,960
Speaker 1: because in my life, which has had none of the

1250
00:59:27,080 --> 00:59:29,480
Speaker 1: trauma on that level, like that is just you know,

1251
00:59:29,520 --> 00:59:31,520
Speaker 1: the moment in my life, which seems so silly, that

1252
00:59:31,840 --> 00:59:34,360
Speaker 1: where I hit my quote unquote rock bottom, is like

1253
00:59:34,520 --> 00:59:36,600
Speaker 1: there was always this feeling of like there's only up

1254
00:59:36,640 --> 00:59:39,920
Speaker 1: from here. So again, my stories don't compare to yours,

1255
00:59:39,960 --> 00:59:43,640
Speaker 1: but I think that's where we relearn our strength, and

1256
00:59:43,760 --> 00:59:45,800
Speaker 1: it's once we're knocked down a little bit, do we

1257
00:59:45,880 --> 00:59:48,840
Speaker 1: have to kind of refigure out our courage here? So

1258
00:59:49,040 --> 00:59:51,680
Speaker 1: tell us a little bit about like the self defense

1259
00:59:51,920 --> 00:59:55,560
Speaker 1: that you subscribe to, how it's physical, mental, and spiritual.

1260
00:59:55,760 --> 00:59:57,840
Speaker 1: So when I told you about by like girls, how

1261
00:59:57,960 --> 01:00:00,840
Speaker 1: it got the name the man who said I respect

1262
01:00:00,920 --> 01:00:04,320
Speaker 1: him holy, but that it kind of has evolved for me.

1263
01:00:04,440 --> 01:00:06,560
Speaker 1: So what it meant to me then was like, oh

1264
01:00:06,600 --> 01:00:08,920
Speaker 1: my gosh, I need to teach girls to keep fighting,

1265
01:00:08,960 --> 01:00:11,640
Speaker 1: which I will keep doing, but now how to keep

1266
01:00:11,680 --> 01:00:14,880
Speaker 1: fighting physically, how to defend themselves. Yeah, yes, Yeah, that's

1267
01:00:14,920 --> 01:00:16,440
Speaker 1: how I was like, Okay, we gotta like fight, like

1268
01:00:16,560 --> 01:00:19,320
Speaker 1: Kaylee thought that night, like I gotta really and you

1269
01:00:19,440 --> 01:00:22,760
Speaker 1: thought too, Yes, But I wanted to raise awareness of

1270
01:00:22,840 --> 01:00:25,080
Speaker 1: like we have to react, we have to make a

1271
01:00:25,160 --> 01:00:27,640
Speaker 1: choice right now that we're ever in that situation, that

1272
01:00:27,760 --> 01:00:30,000
Speaker 1: we don't have to be polite, that we can be loud,

1273
01:00:30,040 --> 01:00:32,840
Speaker 1: that we can be mean, that we can do claude, bite, scratch,

1274
01:00:32,920 --> 01:00:34,720
Speaker 1: do whatever you have to do. So that was very

1275
01:00:34,760 --> 01:00:37,760
Speaker 1: important to me. But as I've evolved and as I've healed,

1276
01:00:37,760 --> 01:00:40,320
Speaker 1: and as I've talked to victims throughout the last five years,

1277
01:00:40,600 --> 01:00:44,600
Speaker 1: the phrase if only girls would fight back bugs me,

1278
01:00:44,800 --> 01:00:48,080
Speaker 1: so I'm like, no, no, no, if only men would

1279
01:00:48,200 --> 01:00:53,440
Speaker 1: stop abusing women. It's not about girls not fighting or fighting,

1280
01:00:53,640 --> 01:00:58,360
Speaker 1: it's about men abusing women. Self defense isn't a women's issue.

1281
01:00:58,520 --> 01:01:01,200
Speaker 1: It's a man's issue, and that's not a battle of

1282
01:01:01,200 --> 01:01:03,800
Speaker 1: the sexes. To me, it's not a battle of the sexes.

1283
01:01:03,960 --> 01:01:07,840
Speaker 1: But it is like men who abuse are hurting women,

1284
01:01:08,200 --> 01:01:12,400
Speaker 1: they're hurting men as well and boys. It's adult men

1285
01:01:12,640 --> 01:01:16,080
Speaker 1: who are responsible for over ninety nine percent of abuse

1286
01:01:16,680 --> 01:01:20,040
Speaker 1: and it's their issue. And so my approach to self

1287
01:01:20,080 --> 01:01:23,280
Speaker 1: defense is, yes, I want to teach women to fight

1288
01:01:23,320 --> 01:01:26,240
Speaker 1: back physically, and I'll continue to do that, but I'm

1289
01:01:26,320 --> 01:01:29,760
Speaker 1: also simultaneously going to be digging to the root of

1290
01:01:29,800 --> 01:01:32,919
Speaker 1: the problem, which is at what point do men turn

1291
01:01:32,960 --> 01:01:36,360
Speaker 1: into monsters to abuse? And how can I work with men,

1292
01:01:36,760 --> 01:01:39,440
Speaker 1: good men to change the discussion to not make it

1293
01:01:39,520 --> 01:01:42,720
Speaker 1: about if girls would do this, or if people would

1294
01:01:42,720 --> 01:01:44,640
Speaker 1: always say, well, if you would have closed your window,

1295
01:01:45,040 --> 01:01:48,040
Speaker 1: or if you would have done that. And nothing infuriates

1296
01:01:48,040 --> 01:01:50,880
Speaker 1: me more than that because I could sleep with my

1297
01:01:50,960 --> 01:01:54,920
Speaker 1: windows wide open, and it is not okay for a

1298
01:01:54,960 --> 01:01:58,480
Speaker 1: man to come, but it's put against the victim and

1299
01:01:58,520 --> 01:02:01,800
Speaker 1: it's just the conversation has to change and we need

1300
01:02:01,880 --> 01:02:04,720
Speaker 1: each other to do it. And so my approach to

1301
01:02:04,760 --> 01:02:08,080
Speaker 1: self defense is, yes, let's physically fight back, let's address

1302
01:02:08,200 --> 01:02:11,320
Speaker 1: the mental and emotional things as well. I think that

1303
01:02:11,480 --> 01:02:15,080
Speaker 1: my physical fight it was tiring, it was hard, but

1304
01:02:15,120 --> 01:02:20,160
Speaker 1: it felt like in comparison to my mental and emotional

1305
01:02:20,200 --> 01:02:23,200
Speaker 1: fights with anxiety and depression. And earlier you said that

1306
01:02:23,240 --> 01:02:26,640
Speaker 1: maybe your story doesn't quote unquote compared to mine, but

1307
01:02:26,680 --> 01:02:32,680
Speaker 1: it absolutely does. Yours does those who are listening. There's

1308
01:02:32,760 --> 01:02:36,040
Speaker 1: stories everyone's to do, and it's something that we have

1309
01:02:36,200 --> 01:02:39,840
Speaker 1: to like, we have to acknowledge, because that's where society

1310
01:02:39,880 --> 01:02:42,760
Speaker 1: has kind of tricked us into thinking that if X, Y,

1311
01:02:42,800 --> 01:02:45,120
Speaker 1: and Z doesn't happen to me, then it's not hard,

1312
01:02:45,240 --> 01:02:47,720
Speaker 1: and that keeps us from healing too. And so I

1313
01:02:47,760 --> 01:02:51,040
Speaker 1: think for people listening and just known, like for you too,

1314
01:02:51,400 --> 01:02:55,600
Speaker 1: like your fight is hard, and there's validation there. And

1315
01:02:55,680 --> 01:02:59,040
Speaker 1: I think the less pain felt, there's more pain caused.

1316
01:02:59,160 --> 01:03:01,160
Speaker 1: And I think that it's okay to feel pain. We

1317
01:03:01,200 --> 01:03:04,280
Speaker 1: need to so we don't cause more for ourselves or

1318
01:03:04,280 --> 01:03:07,040
Speaker 1: in Burger's case, to others. And now that Fight Like

1319
01:03:07,160 --> 01:03:09,760
Speaker 1: Girls was kind of your mission for the last few years,

1320
01:03:09,880 --> 01:03:12,480
Speaker 1: and there's a new baby on the horizon, will hopefully

1321
01:03:12,480 --> 01:03:14,640
Speaker 1: be launched by the time this podcast is out. Tell

1322
01:03:14,720 --> 01:03:17,640
Speaker 1: us about the new baby and the evolution of Fight

1323
01:03:17,720 --> 01:03:21,400
Speaker 1: Like Girls. Yeah, so Fight Like Girls is really attached

1324
01:03:21,480 --> 01:03:23,680
Speaker 1: to the night of My attack, right, and I just

1325
01:03:23,720 --> 01:03:26,760
Speaker 1: feel like it's losing focus of my message and what

1326
01:03:26,840 --> 01:03:29,320
Speaker 1: I really want to be advocating for. I have been

1327
01:03:29,360 --> 01:03:33,400
Speaker 1: pursuing a lawsuit for the duration of the last five years,

1328
01:03:33,600 --> 01:03:37,479
Speaker 1: and I have wanted it. I saw negligence, I saw

1329
01:03:37,560 --> 01:03:41,280
Speaker 1: need to change, and I have been fighting against the dispatcher's,

1330
01:03:41,720 --> 01:03:44,520
Speaker 1: the State of Utah and Salt Lake City. Wow, because

1331
01:03:44,560 --> 01:03:46,200
Speaker 1: none of them came to your rescue. None of them

1332
01:03:46,200 --> 01:03:48,240
Speaker 1: helped you. The protocol was rigid. They were asking you

1333
01:03:48,320 --> 01:03:51,640
Speaker 1: questions you couldn't answer. I feel like it's a very

1334
01:03:51,720 --> 01:03:55,760
Speaker 1: dangerous system that puts the community at risk. And not

1335
01:03:55,840 --> 01:04:00,120
Speaker 1: to Salt Lake City. It's a nationwide actually international or

1336
01:04:00,160 --> 01:04:02,400
Speaker 1: system that I believe is very dangerous, and not only

1337
01:04:02,480 --> 01:04:04,680
Speaker 1: is it putting communities at risk, but it's putting law

1338
01:04:04,760 --> 01:04:07,320
Speaker 1: enforcement at risk just as such as US because no

1339
01:04:07,360 --> 01:04:10,720
Speaker 1: one is being dispatched. But there was also other negligence

1340
01:04:10,760 --> 01:04:12,760
Speaker 1: that I haven't really been able to talk about that

1341
01:04:12,800 --> 01:04:14,960
Speaker 1: I will continue to talk about in my new platform,

1342
01:04:15,120 --> 01:04:19,000
Speaker 1: the VA movement. But Burger my attackers shouldn't have been

1343
01:04:19,040 --> 01:04:21,640
Speaker 1: out of prison, and he was, and he's let out

1344
01:04:21,640 --> 01:04:25,120
Speaker 1: of prison negligently multiple times. He went to a state

1345
01:04:25,200 --> 01:04:29,440
Speaker 1: run halfway house that had zero security. It's a shit show.

1346
01:04:29,600 --> 01:04:33,520
Speaker 1: I'm being frank. Law enforcement officers that I've talked to,

1347
01:04:33,720 --> 01:04:37,200
Speaker 1: many of them who have sent me messages anonymously, say

1348
01:04:37,240 --> 01:04:39,560
Speaker 1: that they refer to it as the it's called a

1349
01:04:39,640 --> 01:04:42,200
Speaker 1: forted to treatment center, but they refer to it as

1350
01:04:42,200 --> 01:04:45,120
Speaker 1: a fugitive training center. So it's just a very dangerous place.

1351
01:04:45,160 --> 01:04:47,360
Speaker 1: But it is run by the state of Utah, and

1352
01:04:47,520 --> 01:04:50,520
Speaker 1: watching that place. After my attempted murder, there's been several

1353
01:04:50,520 --> 01:04:52,640
Speaker 1: other murders from people who have gotten out of there

1354
01:04:52,840 --> 01:04:55,439
Speaker 1: and anyway, so I'm just trying to pursue change, right,

1355
01:04:55,480 --> 01:04:58,720
Speaker 1: So I filed this lawsuit against the software company. We

1356
01:04:59,000 --> 01:05:01,600
Speaker 1: ended up losing the law suit earlier this year, which

1357
01:05:01,640 --> 01:05:05,320
Speaker 1: is frustrating, and that's a whole other situation, but it

1358
01:05:05,360 --> 01:05:08,600
Speaker 1: has allowed me to finally be able to tell all

1359
01:05:08,600 --> 01:05:12,280
Speaker 1: the parts of my story and to create a place

1360
01:05:12,360 --> 01:05:16,640
Speaker 1: of resources to help girls and women keep fighting while

1361
01:05:16,640 --> 01:05:19,320
Speaker 1: we disrupt the conversation around self defense. So I decided

1362
01:05:19,360 --> 01:05:23,800
Speaker 1: to name it Bea after Nike, the Greek goddess's little

1363
01:05:23,800 --> 01:05:26,560
Speaker 1: sister bs. It's kind of a nod decay. Lee Bea

1364
01:05:26,720 --> 01:05:30,120
Speaker 1: was the goddess of energy and might and strength and power.

1365
01:05:30,360 --> 01:05:33,880
Speaker 1: She is the one who bound their greatest threat and

1366
01:05:34,080 --> 01:05:38,040
Speaker 1: saved the people you will, and she placed torment in

1367
01:05:38,080 --> 01:05:40,280
Speaker 1: the direction of the tormentor. And I think that that's

1368
01:05:40,280 --> 01:05:41,960
Speaker 1: what I'm trying to do with the BA movement. But

1369
01:05:42,040 --> 01:05:44,160
Speaker 1: I can't do it alone. It needs to be more

1370
01:05:44,200 --> 01:05:46,720
Speaker 1: than my story. I need your story. I need the

1371
01:05:46,760 --> 01:05:49,120
Speaker 1: listeners story. We all just need a link arms to

1372
01:05:49,200 --> 01:05:51,400
Speaker 1: make this, to make it happen right. And that is

1373
01:05:51,440 --> 01:05:55,320
Speaker 1: why you embody, I think living your truthious life from

1374
01:05:55,480 --> 01:05:59,480
Speaker 1: the start, to the self reflection, to the physical fight,

1375
01:05:59,520 --> 01:06:02,520
Speaker 1: to the emotional fight, to five years later now saying

1376
01:06:02,840 --> 01:06:04,920
Speaker 1: you know, fight like girls. This isn't about me. I

1377
01:06:04,960 --> 01:06:08,520
Speaker 1: need all of us to come together and talk about

1378
01:06:08,680 --> 01:06:12,320
Speaker 1: the rock bottom moments because sweeping them under the rug

1379
01:06:12,720 --> 01:06:16,840
Speaker 1: is not helping anybody emotionally physically, It's not changing the system.

1380
01:06:16,880 --> 01:06:20,080
Speaker 1: It's not changing the conversation. So if we hopefully by

1381
01:06:20,080 --> 01:06:21,600
Speaker 1: the time this launches, we can go to the b

1382
01:06:21,680 --> 01:06:23,680
Speaker 1: A movement and check it out on Instagram. Will you

1383
01:06:23,720 --> 01:06:27,120
Speaker 1: be fight like girls anymore? You'll be now across the

1384
01:06:27,120 --> 01:06:29,120
Speaker 1: board be a movement. So I'll put in the show

1385
01:06:29,160 --> 01:06:32,280
Speaker 1: notes when this is out where you can find Bree

1386
01:06:32,320 --> 01:06:35,920
Speaker 1: most importantly, and just a couple of close out questions

1387
01:06:35,960 --> 01:06:38,920
Speaker 1: a little bit more light. First question is just can

1388
01:06:38,960 --> 01:06:41,920
Speaker 1: you provide any tools as to how to shift away

1389
01:06:42,000 --> 01:06:45,440
Speaker 1: from victimhood into empowerment? And I don't think this is

1390
01:06:45,440 --> 01:06:48,040
Speaker 1: a static thing like that you do once, Like I

1391
01:06:48,080 --> 01:06:50,320
Speaker 1: feel like even for myself throughout the day, like I

1392
01:06:50,320 --> 01:06:53,360
Speaker 1: could play victim for little not obviously in trauma, but

1393
01:06:53,440 --> 01:06:55,320
Speaker 1: throughout the day, it's easy to kind of shift the narrative.

1394
01:06:55,320 --> 01:06:57,640
Speaker 1: Is there anything you do to move out of victimhood

1395
01:06:57,640 --> 01:07:00,640
Speaker 1: into empowerment? Yeah, Actually there's a lot of things. And

1396
01:07:00,720 --> 01:07:04,200
Speaker 1: some days it will sincerely be opening my blinds and

1397
01:07:04,280 --> 01:07:07,960
Speaker 1: like looking outside and looking at three things and saying

1398
01:07:07,960 --> 01:07:09,960
Speaker 1: out loud what I see or what I'm grateful for.

1399
01:07:10,160 --> 01:07:12,600
Speaker 1: There are other things moving my body. That's a huge

1400
01:07:12,640 --> 01:07:15,040
Speaker 1: thing for me because I can feel myself getting stronger.

1401
01:07:15,080 --> 01:07:17,200
Speaker 1: I can feel like when I'm sweating, I feel like

1402
01:07:17,240 --> 01:07:20,480
Speaker 1: I'm working really hard. I'm releasing like the negative things

1403
01:07:20,520 --> 01:07:22,840
Speaker 1: that are like the trauma held inside of my body,

1404
01:07:22,840 --> 01:07:25,200
Speaker 1: and that feels empowering. It feels like I have control.

1405
01:07:25,400 --> 01:07:28,200
Speaker 1: And then I just think controlling my thoughts or being

1406
01:07:28,240 --> 01:07:31,920
Speaker 1: on top of my thoughts and defining whatever I'm up

1407
01:07:31,960 --> 01:07:35,320
Speaker 1: against before it defines me that day, whether it's my

1408
01:07:35,360 --> 01:07:38,760
Speaker 1: pants aren't fitting or just change my pants and being

1409
01:07:38,800 --> 01:07:40,640
Speaker 1: okay with it and like moving on with my day

1410
01:07:40,680 --> 01:07:43,280
Speaker 1: instead of just letting it define me. I trying to

1411
01:07:43,280 --> 01:07:45,520
Speaker 1: define it. First. I heard you say in a podcast,

1412
01:07:45,520 --> 01:07:49,960
Speaker 1: and it actually rocked my world that thoughts are not reality,

1413
01:07:50,080 --> 01:07:52,880
Speaker 1: and so, I mean, I feel like I didn't have

1414
01:07:52,920 --> 01:07:56,640
Speaker 1: the language to explain that, but that has drastically helped

1415
01:07:56,680 --> 01:07:58,360
Speaker 1: me too. Like I used to be very refused to

1416
01:07:58,400 --> 01:08:01,600
Speaker 1: my thoughts. When you can have your thoughts not automatically

1417
01:08:01,600 --> 01:08:05,120
Speaker 1: trigger the feeling, yeah, it disrupts things. So I think

1418
01:08:05,160 --> 01:08:08,120
Speaker 1: that starting to listen to your thoughts and questioning them

1419
01:08:08,360 --> 01:08:10,520
Speaker 1: is super helpful. And I've learned that from you. That

1420
01:08:10,840 --> 01:08:13,400
Speaker 1: means so much to me. I think that I had

1421
01:08:13,400 --> 01:08:15,680
Speaker 1: a therapist tell me that if ever I had a thought,

1422
01:08:15,760 --> 01:08:18,000
Speaker 1: like I really struggled when I first moved back to

1423
01:08:18,000 --> 01:08:20,160
Speaker 1: Salt Lake after six months of living with my parents,

1424
01:08:20,320 --> 01:08:23,080
Speaker 1: I was in my house all the time, and that

1425
01:08:23,160 --> 01:08:26,040
Speaker 1: doesn't help my depression. That wasn't helping my depression. So

1426
01:08:26,120 --> 01:08:29,600
Speaker 1: I was like helping one thing, my fear by staying inside.

1427
01:08:29,800 --> 01:08:32,640
Speaker 1: But then it was just a mess again. No, but

1428
01:08:33,040 --> 01:08:38,040
Speaker 1: a normal mess, an important progression, totally, an understandable, relatable mess. Right.

1429
01:08:38,360 --> 01:08:40,600
Speaker 1: I'm just like, like, how are you supposed to I

1430
01:08:40,640 --> 01:08:44,000
Speaker 1: don't believe in balancing. I believe more in like harmonizing.

1431
01:08:44,120 --> 01:08:47,360
Speaker 1: I just balancing is just I can't do it, and

1432
01:08:47,360 --> 01:08:49,080
Speaker 1: so I just have to take it off my radar.

1433
01:08:49,200 --> 01:08:51,639
Speaker 1: But my therapist told me that whenever I have a thought,

1434
01:08:51,680 --> 01:08:53,880
Speaker 1: to write it down and then put it at least

1435
01:08:54,000 --> 01:08:56,360
Speaker 1: six feet away from me, and then read it out loud,

1436
01:08:56,520 --> 01:08:59,040
Speaker 1: point to it and say that is just a thought.

1437
01:08:59,640 --> 01:09:01,200
Speaker 1: So I would do that all the time. I just

1438
01:09:01,200 --> 01:09:03,280
Speaker 1: had a little post it note stack and I would

1439
01:09:03,280 --> 01:09:06,120
Speaker 1: just write my thought of if I was going outside

1440
01:09:06,160 --> 01:09:08,800
Speaker 1: to get the mail, I just write that someone is

1441
01:09:08,840 --> 01:09:10,840
Speaker 1: going to kill me, and I'd put it over there

1442
01:09:11,000 --> 01:09:12,840
Speaker 1: and then I'd be like, oh no, or not. Like,

1443
01:09:12,920 --> 01:09:17,000
Speaker 1: that's just and it's help I mean slowly and like

1444
01:09:17,200 --> 01:09:20,800
Speaker 1: practicing that helped me make that habit right from that

1445
01:09:20,880 --> 01:09:23,679
Speaker 1: habit of tracking my thoughts, and it's been very very

1446
01:09:23,760 --> 01:09:26,559
Speaker 1: helpful and healing. Right. I love that well, I love

1447
01:09:26,560 --> 01:09:28,040
Speaker 1: that as a tool. I should say not that, I

1448
01:09:28,080 --> 01:09:33,040
Speaker 1: love that love that. Two more questions. One is a

1449
01:09:33,040 --> 01:09:34,800
Speaker 1: little bit more of a yes or no, and then

1450
01:09:34,800 --> 01:09:36,760
Speaker 1: the other one's just fun. So we're moving into light.

1451
01:09:36,960 --> 01:09:39,880
Speaker 1: Do you believe that everything happens for a reason. I

1452
01:09:39,920 --> 01:09:42,439
Speaker 1: could easily sit here and say, Yep, everything happens for

1453
01:09:42,439 --> 01:09:45,760
Speaker 1: a reason because everything's moved me along dandy, so but

1454
01:09:46,000 --> 01:09:48,479
Speaker 1: for you, I mean, my first answer would be no,

1455
01:09:49,600 --> 01:09:52,759
Speaker 1: that's really tricky. I think that we can define the reason,

1456
01:09:52,960 --> 01:09:55,760
Speaker 1: whatever that is. I have a hard time believing that

1457
01:09:56,000 --> 01:09:58,559
Speaker 1: Burger happened to me for a reason. You know, your

1458
01:09:58,680 --> 01:10:01,519
Speaker 1: your strength is saving life every day fight like Girls

1459
01:10:01,560 --> 01:10:05,320
Speaker 1: Soon to be BA is saving lives, from a learning

1460
01:10:05,320 --> 01:10:09,200
Speaker 1: to fight to a learning to process your emotions. It

1461
01:10:09,360 --> 01:10:13,200
Speaker 1: is saving lives. And although you went through the horror,

1462
01:10:13,280 --> 01:10:16,960
Speaker 1: there were so many almost moments from the suitcase that

1463
01:10:17,080 --> 01:10:20,439
Speaker 1: you know just saved your life. To Kaylee, I mean

1464
01:10:20,720 --> 01:10:24,240
Speaker 1: every bit of Kayley's involvement to the layout of your house.

1465
01:10:24,280 --> 01:10:26,679
Speaker 1: You know, there were so many moments that it's clear

1466
01:10:26,720 --> 01:10:28,960
Speaker 1: to me that you're here for a reason. And I've

1467
01:10:29,000 --> 01:10:31,800
Speaker 1: been magnetically pulled to you from the beginning. But I

1468
01:10:31,840 --> 01:10:35,840
Speaker 1: think even Prebree, the spontaneous one, I would have been

1469
01:10:35,880 --> 01:10:38,800
Speaker 1: pulled to her as well because there are something so

1470
01:10:38,840 --> 01:10:42,640
Speaker 1: special about you. And then the last question, which is fun. Yes,

1471
01:10:42,840 --> 01:10:44,439
Speaker 1: well before you get the last question, I'm like, you

1472
01:10:44,520 --> 01:10:47,400
Speaker 1: kind of made me change my mind on my answer. Okay, See, well,

1473
01:10:47,439 --> 01:10:49,960
Speaker 1: sometimes I think we need each other to tell the

1474
01:10:50,040 --> 01:10:52,240
Speaker 1: other person what we see in them, because from where

1475
01:10:52,320 --> 01:10:55,040
Speaker 1: we're sitting it can get a little foggy. And that's

1476
01:10:55,360 --> 01:11:00,519
Speaker 1: why having these hard conversations is important and ask somebody,

1477
01:11:00,560 --> 01:11:03,360
Speaker 1: are you okay? Really? You know not oh? Or your

1478
01:11:03,400 --> 01:11:06,519
Speaker 1: wounds healing? Like getting into it being there for people

1479
01:11:06,600 --> 01:11:08,360
Speaker 1: who were you know, you were a stranger on the

1480
01:11:08,400 --> 01:11:10,880
Speaker 1: internet two years ago or whenever I found you. But

1481
01:11:11,560 --> 01:11:13,920
Speaker 1: being human to each other is important because we can

1482
01:11:13,960 --> 01:11:16,920
Speaker 1: see the strength that we might not feel in that moment. Yeah,

1483
01:11:17,040 --> 01:11:19,840
Speaker 1: I also think that you helped me shift my focus,

1484
01:11:19,840 --> 01:11:22,560
Speaker 1: and that's like another lesson that I still this is

1485
01:11:22,560 --> 01:11:25,439
Speaker 1: a good example, five years later, when you ask that question,

1486
01:11:25,760 --> 01:11:29,040
Speaker 1: I like, my trauma makes me focus on Burger and

1487
01:11:29,320 --> 01:11:32,360
Speaker 1: really I need to be focusing on the bigger picture

1488
01:11:32,400 --> 01:11:34,439
Speaker 1: like we've been talking about, but I need to do

1489
01:11:34,479 --> 01:11:36,360
Speaker 1: that in my own way of like, there were so

1490
01:11:36,400 --> 01:11:39,519
Speaker 1: many other things that happened that night that we're good

1491
01:11:39,720 --> 01:11:42,439
Speaker 1: than bad, and so thank you for helping me. The

1492
01:11:42,479 --> 01:11:44,759
Speaker 1: trauma brain is always going to be there to protect

1493
01:11:44,800 --> 01:11:47,120
Speaker 1: us and it's always going to jump in first. So

1494
01:11:47,479 --> 01:11:50,200
Speaker 1: thank you trauma brain for you know, allowing me to

1495
01:11:50,400 --> 01:11:52,800
Speaker 1: feel like maybe everything doesn't happen for a reason because

1496
01:11:52,800 --> 01:11:55,559
Speaker 1: that makes me feel unsafe to then shifting it aside,

1497
01:11:55,600 --> 01:11:58,960
Speaker 1: moving into gratitude, acknowledging that really sucked and hurt and

1498
01:11:59,080 --> 01:12:03,040
Speaker 1: why me? But also look at where I am alive

1499
01:12:03,080 --> 01:12:05,559
Speaker 1: and breathing, And there are some times and some people

1500
01:12:05,600 --> 01:12:08,639
Speaker 1: that have connected in my life, including you, that I

1501
01:12:08,680 --> 01:12:12,120
Speaker 1: can imagine life without a lot of connections that have

1502
01:12:12,360 --> 01:12:15,080
Speaker 1: come because of it, or growth or personal growth or

1503
01:12:15,120 --> 01:12:17,400
Speaker 1: experiences that I've been able to have too. So it

1504
01:12:17,520 --> 01:12:20,720
Speaker 1: is interesting when we decide to keep fighting and when

1505
01:12:20,760 --> 01:12:25,000
Speaker 1: we decide to define that, we just redefine our entire life,

1506
01:12:25,120 --> 01:12:27,320
Speaker 1: right yep. And then the last question, which is fun,

1507
01:12:27,600 --> 01:12:30,280
Speaker 1: is if you were a tree, what type of tree

1508
01:12:30,320 --> 01:12:32,760
Speaker 1: would you be? Bree nothing like a little bow on

1509
01:12:32,800 --> 01:12:37,920
Speaker 1: top of an intense conversation. You can thank Elyssa Chase,

1510
01:12:38,000 --> 01:12:40,519
Speaker 1: who created the jingle to my podcast for this question.

1511
01:12:40,520 --> 01:12:44,920
Speaker 1: So it's always sprinkling questions into my great question. Great question. Well,

1512
01:12:44,960 --> 01:12:48,400
Speaker 1: my first thought, there's this tree in southern Brazil where

1513
01:12:48,400 --> 01:12:51,559
Speaker 1: I lived, and there's no branches all the way up,

1514
01:12:51,680 --> 01:12:54,160
Speaker 1: and then the branches at the very top are just

1515
01:12:54,520 --> 01:12:56,559
Speaker 1: It's the most random tree I've ever seen. But it's

1516
01:12:56,600 --> 01:12:59,000
Speaker 1: just like flat across. It looks like the letter like

1517
01:12:59,120 --> 01:13:01,400
Speaker 1: a pin, just like standing up. I don't even know.

1518
01:13:01,680 --> 01:13:04,200
Speaker 1: We don't know the name of it. A Brazilian tree. Okay, yeah,

1519
01:13:04,200 --> 01:13:05,760
Speaker 1: look it up. We need that. I'll find it. My

1520
01:13:05,800 --> 01:13:08,479
Speaker 1: second response would be an oak tree because it's nostalgic

1521
01:13:08,520 --> 01:13:10,040
Speaker 1: and I had those growing up and I just love

1522
01:13:10,120 --> 01:13:12,479
Speaker 1: to climb them and just hang out with them. That's

1523
01:13:12,520 --> 01:13:15,760
Speaker 1: I guess where I found spontaneous Brie up the oak.

1524
01:13:18,080 --> 01:13:19,760
Speaker 1: I love that. I like that. That's where you went

1525
01:13:19,800 --> 01:13:23,519
Speaker 1: to to the innocence of you. So that's that's telling.

1526
01:13:23,520 --> 01:13:26,439
Speaker 1: There's always meaning to these questions. Perhaps, all right, brite.

1527
01:13:26,479 --> 01:13:29,000
Speaker 1: Thank you so much for coming on and more than

1528
01:13:29,160 --> 01:13:32,679
Speaker 1: bravely telling your story, like being emotionally available to tell

1529
01:13:32,720 --> 01:13:36,200
Speaker 1: your story. And thank you for reminding us about boundaries,

1530
01:13:36,360 --> 01:13:39,479
Speaker 1: our inner strength, and that we don't always need to

1531
01:13:39,520 --> 01:13:42,120
Speaker 1: be strong and there's a place for all of it.

1532
01:13:42,280 --> 01:13:44,960
Speaker 1: We are so excited to see what you're going to do,

1533
01:13:45,360 --> 01:13:48,240
Speaker 1: both personally and professionally, and I'm honored to know you.

1534
01:13:48,360 --> 01:13:50,160
Speaker 1: You're the best. Thank you for having me, and thank

1535
01:13:50,160 --> 01:13:52,760
Speaker 1: you for sharing your platform and doing everything that you're

1536
01:13:52,800 --> 01:13:55,280
Speaker 1: doing to help people keep fighting as well. You've helped

1537
01:13:55,320 --> 01:13:59,680
Speaker 1: me multiple times. I can't even believe that, but thank you, Brett.

1538
01:14:00,800 --> 01:14:04,480
Speaker 1: We'll see you over around bia Hey. Thanks for having me. Well,

1539
01:14:04,520 --> 01:14:08,439
Speaker 1: that was quite the episode out the Door. I do

1540
01:14:08,520 --> 01:14:10,400
Speaker 1: have to let you know that not every episode is

1541
01:14:10,400 --> 01:14:13,320
Speaker 1: going to have a story like Breeze at that level

1542
01:14:13,400 --> 01:14:16,439
Speaker 1: of intensity. But like Breeze said, and why I thought

1543
01:14:16,479 --> 01:14:18,719
Speaker 1: she was such a great first episode out the Door,

1544
01:14:18,920 --> 01:14:21,360
Speaker 1: we all have our own fights to fight, and they're

1545
01:14:21,360 --> 01:14:24,200
Speaker 1: all uniquely hard in their own ways. And I want

1546
01:14:24,200 --> 01:14:26,880
Speaker 1: to reiterate an important part that Breese said that really

1547
01:14:26,880 --> 01:14:28,800
Speaker 1: spoke to me, and it was that it's okay to

1548
01:14:28,840 --> 01:14:32,000
Speaker 1: feel pain it's necessary to feel pain so that we

1549
01:14:32,120 --> 01:14:35,799
Speaker 1: don't cause more pain and hurt for others. So remember

1550
01:14:35,800 --> 01:14:39,000
Speaker 1: to support Bree by following her supporting the BA movement.

1551
01:14:39,200 --> 01:14:41,400
Speaker 1: And if you like this episode, which I so hope

1552
01:14:41,439 --> 01:14:45,320
Speaker 1: you did, subscribe, rate it and leave me some comments.

1553
01:14:45,360 --> 01:14:47,639
Speaker 1: This will be so hugely helpful. And if you've got

1554
01:14:47,680 --> 01:14:50,160
Speaker 1: your own story to feature, I'd love to hear from you.

1555
01:14:50,360 --> 01:14:53,759
Speaker 1: Email me at hello attruthiuslife dot com