WEBVTT - “WE HATE EACH OTHER”

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<v Speaker 1>Hello, Hello, is this the gag?

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<v Speaker 2>Yes, sir? Who is this?

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<v Speaker 1>This is Patrick?

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<v Speaker 2>Patrick? Patrick? You wait where? I heard a little beep

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<v Speaker 2>in the background. What was that?

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<v Speaker 1>Oh?

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<v Speaker 2>You're getting out of your car.

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<v Speaker 1>I just got in the car.

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<v Speaker 2>Okay, are you about to start driving the car somewhere?

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<v Speaker 1>I'm not going to be the one driving.

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<v Speaker 2>Okay, Well, who are you in the car with?

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<v Speaker 1>I'm in the car with my six months old and

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<v Speaker 1>her mother?

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<v Speaker 2>Oh what? Okay? Wait, okay, so you just all right?

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<v Speaker 2>You texted me and you said I'm texting you because

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<v Speaker 2>I want to talk to you about how I fucked

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<v Speaker 2>up my relationship with my daughter's mother so bad that

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<v Speaker 2>it genuinely made me rethink my whole life. And you

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<v Speaker 2>want to talk to me about this while she's driving

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<v Speaker 2>a car.

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<v Speaker 1>See you. I'm totally down for it.

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<v Speaker 2>Okay, all right, go ahead. What happened? How did you

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<v Speaker 2>fuck up this relationship?

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<v Speaker 1>So this relationship has been going has been going on

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<v Speaker 1>for seven or eight years now, but it was kind

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<v Speaker 1>of rocky all the way from the start from my

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<v Speaker 1>own doing. So, I got out of a maybe a

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<v Speaker 1>four year relationship that was basically my whole high school time,

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<v Speaker 1>and then m maybe less than a month after that,

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<v Speaker 1>I met step uh step me, my baby's mother, and

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<v Speaker 1>so we started talking.

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<v Speaker 3>We dated.

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<v Speaker 1>I wasn't over my my high school girlfriend.

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<v Speaker 3>Girl.

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<v Speaker 1>I wasn't over my high school girlfriend yet. And one

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<v Speaker 1>thing led to another. I hit up my old ex

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<v Speaker 1>and then new baby, new new girlfriend found out about it.

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<v Speaker 1>So that just strained the whole relationship. And then after that,

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<v Speaker 1>instead of us just completely breaking it off from each other,

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<v Speaker 1>we just kind of.

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<v Speaker 3>Rolled with it.

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<v Speaker 1>I guess you could say you kept dating. Yeah, yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>we kept dating.

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<v Speaker 2>And this was this was several years ago.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, so this that was twenty eighteen. And so then

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<v Speaker 1>we dated, like I guess you could say, exclusively for

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<v Speaker 1>about four years, and then we broke up and then

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<v Speaker 1>we were kind of just like on and off since then.

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<v Speaker 2>Okay, And then when did you have this child together?

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<v Speaker 1>That was about six months ago last November.

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<v Speaker 2>Okay, which she was born. So you were on enough

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<v Speaker 2>to do that.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, it was actually a weird situation, but yeah, it was.

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<v Speaker 1>It was one of those on one of those on times.

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<v Speaker 2>And are you happy with that?

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<v Speaker 1>Like?

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<v Speaker 2>Was it was? It? It was this like a choice

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<v Speaker 2>or did this like just happen?

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<v Speaker 3>Uh?

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<v Speaker 1>So it kind of just happened like it was. There

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<v Speaker 1>was definitely no plan of it, but we both kind

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<v Speaker 1>of decided that we didn't really want to go through

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<v Speaker 1>with an abortion.

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<v Speaker 2>Oh so okay, so it was it was an unplanned baby. Yeah, yeah, okay, okay.

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<v Speaker 2>So but you guys, it sounds like you're co parenting

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<v Speaker 2>pretty well considering she's in the car with you right now.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, we're pretty cordial when it comes to our daughter

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<v Speaker 1>because she really has nothing to do with our problems

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<v Speaker 1>that we have between each other, you know, So we

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<v Speaker 1>were pretty cordial for her. But if it's just us too,

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<v Speaker 1>it's like back and forth. Some days were good, some

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<v Speaker 1>days we're.

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<v Speaker 3>Very very bad.

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<v Speaker 2>How and how are you today as you're talking about

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<v Speaker 2>this on the phone while she's in the room.

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<v Speaker 1>Uh, Well, like my tech said, I've been thinking about

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<v Speaker 1>myself and my actions and everything about me a lot lately.

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<v Speaker 1>So I've come to a conclusion that I'm not living

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<v Speaker 1>the way I want to or should be. She's got

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<v Speaker 1>an idea of the way she wants me to be,

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<v Speaker 1>which I don't really I wouldn't say I don't agree with,

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<v Speaker 1>but there's just a different way I don't want to live.

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<v Speaker 3>For myself.

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<v Speaker 2>Okay, let's talk about this. Let's talk about this. What

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<v Speaker 2>what way does she want you to be?

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<v Speaker 1>Let's seem to put it shortly, she would stay more

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<v Speaker 1>attentative to our relationship. Mm hmm. She says more respectful

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<v Speaker 1>to her, to be more respectable to her in our relationship.

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<v Speaker 3>Is she? Dude? Is she?

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<v Speaker 2>Is she feeding you these lines?

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<v Speaker 3>Does she?

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<v Speaker 1>She? She sent me that last one?

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<v Speaker 2>Okay, Okay, Okay. She wants you to be more respectful

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<v Speaker 2>to her and she wants to be more attentive to her. Okay,

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<v Speaker 2>to keep going? Is that it?

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<v Speaker 1>Honestly, porn and sex has been a bit a big

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<v Speaker 1>problem and I really like throughout the.

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<v Speaker 3>Years, Okay, so when okay, so when relationship?

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<v Speaker 2>Okay, all right, but we'll talk about that. But why

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<v Speaker 2>do you Okay, So she she wants you to be

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<v Speaker 2>more attentive to your relationship and more respectful to her.

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<v Speaker 2>Why does that not jive with how you want to live?

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<v Speaker 1>I know, maybe that part doesn't drive Maybe maybe that's

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<v Speaker 1>not the part that I'm talking about, but it's uh,

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<v Speaker 1>I don't know. Just as throughout the seven years, like

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<v Speaker 1>the stuff we've been through and whatnot, we've both lost

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<v Speaker 1>respect for each other. So so for me to to

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<v Speaker 1>start respecting her in that way, it the way she

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<v Speaker 1>wants me to, I don't. I don't think I could

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<v Speaker 1>do it.

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<v Speaker 2>This is crazy, I you know what. Okay, Okay, I've.

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<v Speaker 1>Been waiting to talk to you, dude.

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<v Speaker 2>Okay, so let's let's let's let me hear this. I

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<v Speaker 2>have a pretty good idea. It sounds of how she

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<v Speaker 2>gradually How did she in your How do you believe

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<v Speaker 2>that she lost respect for you over the years, just

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<v Speaker 2>like porn and ship?

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<v Speaker 3>Uh, porn ship.

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<v Speaker 1>During those on and off periods the people I would

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<v Speaker 1>talk to, but I don't think that's really her business

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<v Speaker 1>in the off periods but mostly.

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<v Speaker 2>Uh, she just said she just said something. What does

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<v Speaker 2>she just say?

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<v Speaker 3>What did you say?

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<v Speaker 1>She says I would bring them into the relationship during

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<v Speaker 1>I'm guessing during on periods.

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<v Speaker 3>Wow.

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<v Speaker 2>I want to talk to her so badly, but she's dry. Well, well,

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<v Speaker 2>we'll get to it, we'll get through it.

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<v Speaker 3>Okay, do you want it now?

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<v Speaker 2>I want to. I still have more information I want

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<v Speaker 2>to get out of you first. She so, okay, So yeah,

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<v Speaker 2>in what way? How does she lose respect for you?

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<v Speaker 2>The like to put the masturbation important stuff.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, that's like the base of it, I would say,

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<v Speaker 1>because she feels so okay, let me. I I feel

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<v Speaker 1>just as I know I feel with porn and masturbation

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<v Speaker 1>that that is totally separate from your real sex life,

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<v Speaker 1>and I don't think it shapes how you feel about

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<v Speaker 1>your partner. That's that's my base and I'm standing on it.

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<v Speaker 2>Here's listen, listen, listen, listen. I agree with that as

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<v Speaker 2>a baseline until those things stop being true. So the

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<v Speaker 2>question becomes like, I don't think that porn and masturbation

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<v Speaker 2>are inherently bad for your real sex life until they

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<v Speaker 2>become that right, So like, what do you were you

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<v Speaker 2>like not having sex with her or appreciating her.

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<v Speaker 1>Or dude, we had sex all the time and it

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<v Speaker 1>was I thought it was great sex at least, but

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<v Speaker 1>for her, she with the whole X thing with her,

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<v Speaker 1>I think she believes that I go to porn because

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<v Speaker 1>I don't like her, like I don't enjoy her. But

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<v Speaker 1>it's totally not true.

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<v Speaker 2>What did she.

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<v Speaker 3>What did you think?

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<v Speaker 1>She said? She brought up other people that were that

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<v Speaker 1>have been problems in our relationship during the four year

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<v Speaker 1>on time the beginning. Okay, like the the X basically

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<v Speaker 1>the X.

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<v Speaker 2>Okay, okay, let's look more at what you said in

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<v Speaker 2>this text here. You said I fucked up the relationship

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<v Speaker 2>with her. Okay, so you're let me talk to her? Actually?

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<v Speaker 2>Is that okay? Is she down?

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<v Speaker 3>Yep?

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<v Speaker 1>Do you want to talk to him? Everybody's nervous to

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<v Speaker 1>talk to him. Do you mind if I put it

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<v Speaker 1>on the speaker?

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<v Speaker 2>We can try. Sometimes it sounds shitty, but you know,

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<v Speaker 2>we can try.

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<v Speaker 3>All right.

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<v Speaker 1>Let me let's try here.

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<v Speaker 2>Hello, Hello, Hey, what's your name?

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<v Speaker 4>Stephanie?

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<v Speaker 2>Stephanie? How's it going to Stephanie? Wait, Stephanie, do you

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<v Speaker 2>know who? Do you know who I am? Or what

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<v Speaker 2>the context of any of this is?

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<v Speaker 4>Yes, we want to see a show in San Diego?

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<v Speaker 2>Oh you but what you both went to see my

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<v Speaker 2>show in San Diego?

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<v Speaker 1>Yah?

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<v Speaker 2>Dude? What dude? Why don't you guys just why the okay?

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<v Speaker 1>What?

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<v Speaker 2>Okay? All right, let me Stephanie. Why have you lost

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<v Speaker 2>respect for I forget? I'm gonna call him John three?

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<v Speaker 2>Is fucking Patrick Patrick? Why have you lost respect for Patrick?

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<v Speaker 4>Because? Uh, you never respect you since the beginning. It

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<v Speaker 4>was always lie after lying, so like in the way

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<v Speaker 4>that he, I guess cuts himself out there. He just

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<v Speaker 4>doesn't care about his image, and oh, I just think

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<v Speaker 4>it's disrespectful on his end.

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<v Speaker 2>What do you mean by he doesn't care about his image?

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<v Speaker 4>Like, mmm, i'd was gonna want me to talk about

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<v Speaker 4>this go for like during my pregnancy, he was still,

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<v Speaker 4>you know, doing stuff behind me back, liking stuff. He's

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<v Speaker 4>not supposed to talking to girls.

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<v Speaker 2>He's not supposed to well, like he was cheating on

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<v Speaker 2>you while you were pregnant.

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<v Speaker 4>Yes, okay, maybe we.

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<v Speaker 1>Ship was undefined because we were never really together whenn't

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<v Speaker 1>the baby was conceived. But since the baby was conceived,

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<v Speaker 1>then we decided we weren't going to get an abortion.

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<v Speaker 1>I moved in with her.

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<v Speaker 4>We try to make it work, and he would try

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<v Speaker 4>to well, he would say he would try to make

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<v Speaker 4>it work, but then I would find out things and

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<v Speaker 4>it was just like a fantasy to me.

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<v Speaker 2>Were you were? You? Were you?

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<v Speaker 3>So?

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<v Speaker 2>Were you both seeing other people?

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<v Speaker 4>I wasn't. I'm not sure he was. I don't know

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<v Speaker 4>he did he them, but it's where I could belie.

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<v Speaker 2>Okay, So I mean it sounds like neither of you

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<v Speaker 2>particularly want to like be romantically engaged with each.

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<v Speaker 4>Other, not anymore, not anymore that he still tells me

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<v Speaker 4>that he still wants anything, wants his family to this day.

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<v Speaker 1>So I don't know, but she tells me the same thing. No,

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<v Speaker 1>I don't.

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<v Speaker 2>So you so wait, so Patrick, you you want to

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<v Speaker 2>stay together.

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<v Speaker 1>At this point? Now, I'm I just kind of want

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<v Speaker 1>to be by myself, to work on myself and do

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<v Speaker 1>things for myself. Like for the last fifteen years or so,

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<v Speaker 1>I always kind of held myself back because of the

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<v Speaker 1>people I was talking to, even though I wasn't doing

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<v Speaker 1>them right, I kind of still did hold myself back

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<v Speaker 1>from I think, stuff that I could have been doing

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<v Speaker 1>or just been doing better for myself. So now I'm

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<v Speaker 1>just focusing on myself and my daughter.

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<v Speaker 2>Okay, what about you? What about you, Stephanie.

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<v Speaker 4>I'm my main focus right now is just my daughter,

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<v Speaker 4>to be honest.

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<v Speaker 1>And myself.

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<v Speaker 4>Interesting and just making money.

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<v Speaker 2>But so you guys are like friends.

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<v Speaker 4>Friends I hate each other.

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<v Speaker 2>Okay because you both you both went to you both

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<v Speaker 2>went to see my show.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah yeah, which was actually very fun.

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<v Speaker 2>Oh thanks, thanks? Wow? Who watched your daughter while you

0:14:53.440 --> 0:14:54.080
<v Speaker 2>were at the show?

0:14:55.800 --> 0:14:56.240
<v Speaker 1>My mother?

0:14:57.000 --> 0:15:03.800
<v Speaker 2>Your mother? Okay, yeah, all, Stephanie, are you are you?

0:15:03.920 --> 0:15:05.880
<v Speaker 2>Have you tried dating anyone else? Or you're just like

0:15:06.320 --> 0:15:08.200
<v Speaker 2>on your own ship right now?

0:15:09.640 --> 0:15:12.720
<v Speaker 4>Oh my own ship? I don't. I just don't have

0:15:12.760 --> 0:15:15.480
<v Speaker 4>the motivation really to go out there, especially be in

0:15:15.480 --> 0:15:18.600
<v Speaker 4>a single mom in this society. I feel like nobody

0:15:18.680 --> 0:15:22.800
<v Speaker 4>wants that, you know, type of life.

0:15:24.040 --> 0:15:24.920
<v Speaker 2>How's your kid doing?

0:15:26.440 --> 0:15:31.280
<v Speaker 4>You're doing great, It's wonderful, blessing.

0:15:33.200 --> 0:15:39.320
<v Speaker 2>Wow, it sounds like you know what's funny is you you?

0:15:40.240 --> 0:15:45.280
<v Speaker 2>This is so you two have a fascinating relationship with

0:15:45.360 --> 0:15:48.160
<v Speaker 2>each other. You're really do you too have a fascinating

0:15:48.880 --> 0:15:54.840
<v Speaker 2>relationship with other? Because you two clearly have Uh. I

0:15:54.840 --> 0:15:56.360
<v Speaker 2>don't know if you two would agree, but you too

0:15:56.520 --> 0:16:00.760
<v Speaker 2>clearly have a deep friendship with each other. Hands out.

0:16:00.800 --> 0:16:04.280
<v Speaker 2>You clearly have a deep friendship with each other underneath

0:16:04.320 --> 0:16:08.200
<v Speaker 2>it enough for you to like raise a child together.

0:16:09.200 --> 0:16:16.240
<v Speaker 2>But also just a complete lack of Wait. Okay, so Patrick,

0:16:16.320 --> 0:16:19.200
<v Speaker 2>I'm curious, Okay, So Patrick, all right, So I've gotten

0:16:19.240 --> 0:16:24.160
<v Speaker 2>the idea of why Stephanie no longer has respect for you?

0:16:24.240 --> 0:16:26.000
<v Speaker 2>But why do you say you no longer have respect

0:16:26.040 --> 0:16:28.480
<v Speaker 2>for Stephanie?

0:16:29.160 --> 0:16:31.440
<v Speaker 1>I end of the same reason she doesn't have respect

0:16:31.480 --> 0:16:37.480
<v Speaker 1>for me. She would do sets behind my back. I

0:16:37.480 --> 0:16:39.600
<v Speaker 1>would do sets behind her back. We would kind of

0:16:39.640 --> 0:16:43.240
<v Speaker 1>go tit for tot. And then some things I just

0:16:43.440 --> 0:16:46.240
<v Speaker 1>I found out, like maybe a month ago.

0:16:46.760 --> 0:16:52.560
<v Speaker 2>Wait, just made me, Stephanie, is this true? You like

0:16:52.640 --> 0:16:55.680
<v Speaker 2>you would also like see people behind Patrick's back.

0:16:57.160 --> 0:17:00.360
<v Speaker 4>Yeah, because you said the tone of the relationships, it's like,

0:17:00.400 --> 0:17:02.480
<v Speaker 4>give me gonna do something, I'm gonna do him worse.

0:17:04.480 --> 0:17:07.280
<v Speaker 1>Like I said, we would go fit for tat literally,

0:17:07.920 --> 0:17:11.240
<v Speaker 1>so I and it went on for years, years, and

0:17:11.280 --> 0:17:14.280
<v Speaker 1>then once we got to the after we like broke

0:17:14.400 --> 0:17:21.560
<v Speaker 1>up and weren't weren't quote unquote exclusive. We it wasn't

0:17:21.560 --> 0:17:25.280
<v Speaker 1>as bad like or it didn't it didn't matter as much,

0:17:26.440 --> 0:17:29.159
<v Speaker 1>you know, but just some of the stuff that I

0:17:29.280 --> 0:17:32.080
<v Speaker 1>found out, And I'm not sure exactly sure why we

0:17:32.160 --> 0:17:35.520
<v Speaker 1>let it go on so long. Either we both kind

0:17:35.520 --> 0:17:38.200
<v Speaker 1>of one of us would break it off and then

0:17:38.400 --> 0:17:40.920
<v Speaker 1>or and come back, or we would take the other

0:17:40.960 --> 0:17:46.280
<v Speaker 1>person back. It just was a revolving circle. And you

0:17:46.320 --> 0:17:50.680
<v Speaker 1>know what, actually, like maybe two or three months before

0:17:50.760 --> 0:17:54.520
<v Speaker 1>my daughter was conceived, we had kind of came to

0:17:54.600 --> 0:17:56.680
<v Speaker 1>an agreement that we were just gonna leave each other alone.

0:17:56.720 --> 0:17:58.119
<v Speaker 1>And then we never did it again.

0:18:02.800 --> 0:18:09.320
<v Speaker 2>Okay, dude, this is like, why don't you don't why

0:18:09.359 --> 0:18:12.639
<v Speaker 2>don't you two just like, why don't you to just

0:18:12.680 --> 0:18:15.359
<v Speaker 2>like fucking be in a relationship and then be like

0:18:15.400 --> 0:18:19.080
<v Speaker 2>because clear I don't. Clearly you two both like want

0:18:19.119 --> 0:18:21.280
<v Speaker 2>to like fuck other people. Why just be in a

0:18:21.359 --> 0:18:25.480
<v Speaker 2>relationship but then have it be like, listen, if you

0:18:25.480 --> 0:18:27.280
<v Speaker 2>want to fuck other people, that's fine, just let me

0:18:27.320 --> 0:18:32.480
<v Speaker 2>know why you just do like a quasi poly thing.

0:18:34.560 --> 0:18:36.359
<v Speaker 1>Like an open relationship kind of deal.

0:18:36.840 --> 0:18:39.320
<v Speaker 2>I mean, that's I mean, that's essentially what you guys

0:18:39.320 --> 0:18:43.359
<v Speaker 2>have been. You guys have essentially been doing an open relationship.

0:18:43.880 --> 0:18:50.280
<v Speaker 2>But it pisses everybody off because there's no title of it,

0:18:50.320 --> 0:18:51.800
<v Speaker 2>because that wasn't the title of it.

0:18:53.520 --> 0:18:56.520
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, yeah, you know what. Uh someone told us that

0:18:56.640 --> 0:19:03.800
<v Speaker 1>before too. I think what it is, deep down both

0:19:03.840 --> 0:19:09.160
<v Speaker 1>of us want something monogamous, but I think we're kind

0:19:09.160 --> 0:19:14.840
<v Speaker 1>of just too far gone. Yeah, possibly not even kind

0:19:14.840 --> 0:19:16.879
<v Speaker 1>to just we are too far gone.

0:19:17.359 --> 0:19:20.760
<v Speaker 2>Ah, So you don't respect each other, do either? Do

0:19:20.840 --> 0:19:23.040
<v Speaker 2>either of you? Do you believe that you two could

0:19:23.080 --> 0:19:26.560
<v Speaker 2>respect each other again once more?

0:19:27.280 --> 0:19:34.440
<v Speaker 1>Again No, not not in a romantic way. Like she's

0:19:34.480 --> 0:19:37.520
<v Speaker 1>a cool person, and like you said, we do have

0:19:37.600 --> 0:19:42.159
<v Speaker 1>a decent friendship, and I would like to keep it

0:19:42.240 --> 0:19:48.880
<v Speaker 1>that way for our daughter. But yeah, like we said,

0:19:48.920 --> 0:19:51.399
<v Speaker 1>we're focusing on ourselves.

0:19:53.040 --> 0:19:55.840
<v Speaker 2>Okay, respect. Actually, you know what, I'm coming around to this.

0:19:55.880 --> 0:19:58.320
<v Speaker 2>I actually am coming I am actually coming around to

0:19:58.359 --> 0:20:01.560
<v Speaker 2>the idea that you two should not be together. Well

0:20:01.600 --> 0:20:08.479
<v Speaker 2>I'm but but I am wondering what happens when, like

0:20:08.560 --> 0:20:10.359
<v Speaker 2>if one of you gets like a boyfriend or a

0:20:10.359 --> 0:20:12.879
<v Speaker 2>girlfriend like you guys, are you gonna be jealous?

0:20:15.080 --> 0:20:23.159
<v Speaker 1>Uh? I? Right now I probably would be for sure.

0:20:23.920 --> 0:20:28.720
<v Speaker 1>But sometime down the road, as long as they're fine

0:20:28.800 --> 0:20:31.480
<v Speaker 1>with my with my daughter and they're treating her right,

0:20:32.520 --> 0:20:37.320
<v Speaker 1>M I got no problems, all right.

0:20:38.760 --> 0:20:41.480
<v Speaker 2>You're so what what's your what's your name again? Patrick?

0:20:42.520 --> 0:20:42.920
<v Speaker 3>Patrick?

0:20:43.400 --> 0:20:48.919
<v Speaker 2>Patrick? You're so fucking lucky? Why I really feel like

0:20:48.960 --> 0:20:54.120
<v Speaker 2>you're so fucking lucky. You're so fucking lucky because you're

0:20:54.160 --> 0:20:59.439
<v Speaker 2>so fucking lucky because you got to fuck up a

0:20:59.600 --> 0:21:11.120
<v Speaker 2>lot and it's kind of fine. You have to fuck up, dude,

0:21:11.400 --> 0:21:14.639
<v Speaker 2>you know, you got to fuck up a ton, and

0:21:14.680 --> 0:21:20.160
<v Speaker 2>it's kind of totally fine because you have because you're

0:21:21.880 --> 0:21:25.000
<v Speaker 2>because dude, like you how many fucking guys? Because dude,

0:21:25.000 --> 0:21:26.679
<v Speaker 2>you know how many fucking guys there are who like

0:21:26.960 --> 0:21:32.359
<v Speaker 2>they fucked up and like their wife or girl, the

0:21:32.359 --> 0:21:36.480
<v Speaker 2>mother of their children cannot be in the same room

0:21:36.720 --> 0:21:39.719
<v Speaker 2>with them, let alone be in the same room with

0:21:39.760 --> 0:21:44.560
<v Speaker 2>them on speakerphone with the gecko talking about it. You

0:21:44.640 --> 0:21:48.720
<v Speaker 2>know what I mean, Like, dude, dude, you're so dude, Well,

0:21:48.760 --> 0:21:52.119
<v Speaker 2>I have a changed my dude. You're so fucking lucky

0:21:52.200 --> 0:21:54.840
<v Speaker 2>right now, do you. How many guys have like you?

0:21:54.880 --> 0:21:57.120
<v Speaker 2>Many guys have like like they cheat on their girlfriend

0:21:57.200 --> 0:22:02.680
<v Speaker 2>or whatever and now they're like in court battling over

0:22:02.840 --> 0:22:07.240
<v Speaker 2>custody or they did some like you. You're so like

0:22:07.359 --> 0:22:12.040
<v Speaker 2>you have. Oh my god, you're so fucking like you

0:22:12.119 --> 0:22:16.879
<v Speaker 2>got like an infinite check, Like you're your family life

0:22:17.280 --> 0:22:21.080
<v Speaker 2>is like at a baseline of like a calm existence.

0:22:21.200 --> 0:22:22.960
<v Speaker 2>Like just the fact that your family life is at

0:22:23.000 --> 0:22:28.000
<v Speaker 2>a baseline of calm existence enough that you can exist

0:22:28.040 --> 0:22:31.159
<v Speaker 2>in this we can have this conversation right now is

0:22:31.560 --> 0:22:34.679
<v Speaker 2>crazy to me. And the fact that you're saying, like

0:22:35.200 --> 0:22:38.840
<v Speaker 2>I wanna I'm directing this to you because you called

0:22:39.080 --> 0:22:43.480
<v Speaker 2>and shit, and like the fact that you're saying to

0:22:43.520 --> 0:22:47.480
<v Speaker 2>me like you texted me in this thing you said today,

0:22:48.359 --> 0:22:53.479
<v Speaker 2>I'm starting the seventy five days of working out, no porn,

0:22:53.720 --> 0:22:58.520
<v Speaker 2>no alcohol, no weed, nothing but locking in on bettering myself,

0:22:59.119 --> 0:23:02.560
<v Speaker 2>like like like, please do that, please do like just

0:23:02.600 --> 0:23:05.720
<v Speaker 2>do that, lock in on yourself. Just try to be

0:23:05.760 --> 0:23:08.800
<v Speaker 2>a better person. Like the fact that you have, like

0:23:08.840 --> 0:23:12.880
<v Speaker 2>the fact that you have the opportunity even to do

0:23:13.000 --> 0:23:16.200
<v Speaker 2>that and to like be a dad. The fact you're

0:23:16.200 --> 0:23:21.399
<v Speaker 2>not like in court doing a fucking whole thing, and

0:23:21.400 --> 0:23:24.679
<v Speaker 2>that you you can go see my show with your

0:23:25.200 --> 0:23:27.480
<v Speaker 2>your ex girlfriend who is the mother of your daughter

0:23:27.520 --> 0:23:31.240
<v Speaker 2>or whatever. Like, dude, you're so fucking lucky. Do you

0:23:31.359 --> 0:23:34.800
<v Speaker 2>understand that, like this is insane.

0:23:35.040 --> 0:23:38.480
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, yeah, I've I've seen it go way words for

0:23:38.560 --> 0:23:39.119
<v Speaker 1>other people.

0:23:39.880 --> 0:23:43.360
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, you're so fucking lucky. Run in the dude. I

0:23:43.400 --> 0:23:47.800
<v Speaker 2>think I think both whatever you got, whatever you guys

0:23:47.840 --> 0:23:51.560
<v Speaker 2>got going on, is awesome or it's not. I don't know.

0:23:51.640 --> 0:23:55.560
<v Speaker 2>I haven't decided yet.

0:23:55.040 --> 0:23:55.200
<v Speaker 1>But.

0:23:57.080 --> 0:24:00.880
<v Speaker 2>Holy shit, thank god, thank god, your daughter's gonna be fine.

0:24:01.080 --> 0:24:03.200
<v Speaker 2>Thank god. I think I think your daughter is gonna

0:24:03.240 --> 0:24:05.600
<v Speaker 2>be fine, gonna be your daughter was going to grow

0:24:05.680 --> 0:24:11.800
<v Speaker 2>up to be a healthy, productive member of society because

0:24:11.840 --> 0:24:16.639
<v Speaker 2>both because oh my god, this is this is this

0:24:16.720 --> 0:24:19.639
<v Speaker 2>is wild, this is crazy. Thank God. I mean, you

0:24:19.720 --> 0:24:24.840
<v Speaker 2>guys could be at each other's throats right now. I

0:24:24.840 --> 0:24:26.240
<v Speaker 2>don't I don't even know how you're doing. I don't

0:24:26.280 --> 0:24:27.760
<v Speaker 2>know how you're doing what you're doing. I don't know

0:24:27.800 --> 0:24:33.480
<v Speaker 2>how you're doing what you're doing. This is one of

0:24:33.480 --> 0:24:36.600
<v Speaker 2>the health This is one of the healthiest relationships I

0:24:36.600 --> 0:24:37.160
<v Speaker 2>think I've.

0:24:38.720 --> 0:24:39.240
<v Speaker 3>Even see.

0:24:40.880 --> 0:24:45.240
<v Speaker 1>I don't know if I would say that, but you know, honestly,

0:24:45.320 --> 0:24:53.359
<v Speaker 1>I think how we kind of were letting this happened

0:24:53.440 --> 0:24:58.160
<v Speaker 1>for so long. I think not only was it a

0:24:58.240 --> 0:25:02.200
<v Speaker 1>lack of respect for each other that was the problem,

0:25:02.359 --> 0:25:06.320
<v Speaker 1>but it was also a lack of respect for like ourselves.

0:25:06.720 --> 0:25:12.040
<v Speaker 1>And that was one thing that I came to, like

0:25:12.080 --> 0:25:16.199
<v Speaker 1>a conclusion I came to recently, which kind of started

0:25:16.200 --> 0:25:18.000
<v Speaker 1>this whole seventy five day thing.

0:25:25.800 --> 0:25:29.720
<v Speaker 2>Well that's good, man, that's good. Let's good. Your daughter.

0:25:29.800 --> 0:25:32.120
<v Speaker 2>Where are you guys driving to? By the way, is

0:25:32.000 --> 0:25:33.040
<v Speaker 2>it a long car ride?

0:25:34.680 --> 0:25:37.400
<v Speaker 1>We actually stopped right now. We're about to go get

0:25:37.440 --> 0:25:37.960
<v Speaker 1>some food.

0:25:39.000 --> 0:25:41.080
<v Speaker 2>You guys are like dating. What is this? It's just

0:25:41.119 --> 0:25:42.000
<v Speaker 2>so funny.

0:25:42.400 --> 0:25:48.120
<v Speaker 1>You're like friends, We're hanging out. I had to pick

0:25:48.200 --> 0:25:51.000
<v Speaker 1>up my daughter and we were both hungry, so I

0:25:51.040 --> 0:25:51.520
<v Speaker 1>was like, you know.

0:25:51.600 --> 0:25:54.840
<v Speaker 2>Whatever, stephan I have a question.

0:25:56.080 --> 0:25:56.399
<v Speaker 4>M hm.

0:25:58.040 --> 0:25:59.960
<v Speaker 2>So, like this is going to go on the internet

0:26:00.720 --> 0:26:02.720
<v Speaker 2>and a bunch of people are gonna comment on stuff.

0:26:03.000 --> 0:26:05.440
<v Speaker 2>Is there? And John's been not I don't know Sebastian

0:26:05.480 --> 0:26:10.080
<v Speaker 2>Sabastian is doing most of the talking and Patrick what

0:26:10.359 --> 0:26:13.400
<v Speaker 2>Patrick's sorry, I don't know where I got smush from.

0:26:13.600 --> 0:26:17.280
<v Speaker 2>Patrick's been doing most of the talking. So just for

0:26:17.320 --> 0:26:19.480
<v Speaker 2>a second, is there anything that you want to say?

0:26:21.760 --> 0:26:25.040
<v Speaker 4>Yeah, I'm just gonna say, if God gives just scientists

0:26:25.040 --> 0:26:27.359
<v Speaker 4>all sucking with them, man, leave him because he's gonna

0:26:27.560 --> 0:26:31.359
<v Speaker 4>turn you into you know, having you have his fault,

0:26:31.440 --> 0:26:34.480
<v Speaker 4>I mean, his kids, and it's gonna be too late.

0:26:36.240 --> 0:26:39.480
<v Speaker 4>It's gonna be it's gonna be too late to go back.

0:26:46.320 --> 0:26:50.520
<v Speaker 4>That's all I'm gonna say. Just be careful, take the

0:26:51.720 --> 0:26:53.760
<v Speaker 4>just look at the race legs and just leave it

0:26:53.800 --> 0:26:57.040
<v Speaker 4>as it is continuing because you're gonna end up being

0:26:57.160 --> 0:27:00.639
<v Speaker 4>like in this relationship and yeah, you're gonna or or

0:27:00.800 --> 0:27:03.000
<v Speaker 4>it could be worse.

0:27:06.359 --> 0:27:12.040
<v Speaker 2>All right, man, that's so funny. Well, thank you for

0:27:12.080 --> 0:27:14.600
<v Speaker 2>thank you for that, Stephanie. John, is there anything you

0:27:14.640 --> 0:27:16.120
<v Speaker 2>want to say to the people before we go?

0:27:18.359 --> 0:27:21.919
<v Speaker 3>Uh?

0:27:22.240 --> 0:27:26.879
<v Speaker 1>No, man, I'm just like, super excited and happy that

0:27:26.920 --> 0:27:27.680
<v Speaker 1>I got to talk to you.

0:27:30.200 --> 0:27:31.960
<v Speaker 2>I'm happy I got to talk to you too. I

0:27:32.000 --> 0:27:37.040
<v Speaker 2>wish we could have It's it's funny that, uh yeah,

0:27:37.080 --> 0:27:39.119
<v Speaker 2>you guys are you guys are interesting? I think I

0:27:39.119 --> 0:27:40.960
<v Speaker 2>don't know. I don't know what's gonna happen to you guys,

0:27:40.960 --> 0:27:43.280
<v Speaker 2>but I'm sure call me back in ten years. I

0:27:43.280 --> 0:27:44.520
<v Speaker 2>want to see what became of this.

0:27:46.680 --> 0:27:46.960
<v Speaker 1>Deal.

0:27:47.960 --> 0:27:54.800
<v Speaker 2>Awesome, all right, you guys have a good one, you too, like, well,

0:27:55.880 --> 0:28:01.480
<v Speaker 2>if there were ever a podcast that I needed the

0:28:01.680 --> 0:28:06.480
<v Speaker 2>audience to weigh in on, I'm very curious what people

0:28:06.480 --> 0:28:09.520
<v Speaker 2>think that that was an interesting that was a fascinating relationship.

0:28:10.960 --> 0:28:15.160
<v Speaker 2>I feel like they're going to get back together, but John,

0:28:15.280 --> 0:28:17.359
<v Speaker 2>I feel like, but they they I feel like they

0:28:17.400 --> 0:28:20.000
<v Speaker 2>can get back together, but John has to really like,

0:28:21.680 --> 0:28:25.440
<v Speaker 2>John has to lock. John has to lock. John has

0:28:25.480 --> 0:28:30.879
<v Speaker 2>to do such an unbelievable amount of locking in for

0:28:31.000 --> 0:28:33.360
<v Speaker 2>them to be able to get back together. He gets

0:28:33.400 --> 0:28:35.960
<v Speaker 2>to do an amount of locking in that I don't

0:28:36.080 --> 0:28:40.520
<v Speaker 2>think is humanly possible, but who knows. I'd love to

0:28:40.520 --> 0:28:45.719
<v Speaker 2>hear in ten years they they figured it out or

0:28:45.760 --> 0:28:50.280
<v Speaker 2>not or fucking either that or step either that or

0:28:50.360 --> 0:28:55.760
<v Speaker 2>John locks in, he does whatever. Stephanie gets a new boyfriend.

0:28:55.840 --> 0:28:58.360
<v Speaker 2>She's happy. Actually that too, that could all that. Also.

0:29:00.400 --> 0:29:03.000
<v Speaker 2>I was having a John focused theory on this, but

0:29:03.160 --> 0:29:06.600
<v Speaker 2>my Stephanie focused theory. She gets a new boyfriend. They

0:29:06.640 --> 0:29:12.440
<v Speaker 2>lock in together. John locks in, he does his thing. Yeah,

0:29:12.440 --> 0:29:13.760
<v Speaker 2>maybe they shouldn't be together.

0:29:15.520 --> 0:29:15.920
<v Speaker 3>All right?

0:29:17.560 --> 0:29:18.600
<v Speaker 4>From Lee?

0:29:20.200 --> 0:29:20.440
<v Speaker 3>Yeah?

0:29:21.120 --> 0:29:23.360
<v Speaker 2>Hello, Hello, Hey, what's up?

0:29:23.400 --> 0:29:23.560
<v Speaker 1>Man?

0:29:23.880 --> 0:29:26.880
<v Speaker 3>Oh? Wow? Hi? How you doing? Hey?

0:29:26.920 --> 0:29:28.680
<v Speaker 2>I'm doing good. What's your name is?

0:29:28.760 --> 0:29:28.960
<v Speaker 3>Lee?

0:29:29.880 --> 0:29:30.120
<v Speaker 2>Lee?

0:29:31.680 --> 0:29:33.480
<v Speaker 3>I'm blessed to speak to you today.

0:29:34.040 --> 0:29:40.680
<v Speaker 2>You share a name with the guy who assassinated John F. Kennedy.

0:29:41.640 --> 0:29:48.120
<v Speaker 3>Ooh, I also share a name with Bruce Lee.

0:29:49.000 --> 0:29:53.080
<v Speaker 2>Uh not really, I mean that's his last name. Lee's

0:29:53.160 --> 0:29:56.160
<v Speaker 2>your first name. So you you half Lee share a

0:29:56.240 --> 0:29:58.600
<v Speaker 2>name with Bruce Lee.

0:29:59.240 --> 0:30:00.520
<v Speaker 3>Okay to something.

0:30:01.800 --> 0:30:04.920
<v Speaker 2>You sound like you're in a car right now, I

0:30:05.040 --> 0:30:07.160
<v Speaker 2>might be Where are you on your way to?

0:30:07.280 --> 0:30:10.680
<v Speaker 3>In this car, I'm on my way to the gym.

0:30:11.200 --> 0:30:12.920
<v Speaker 2>What are you gonna work out today? What part of

0:30:12.920 --> 0:30:15.080
<v Speaker 2>the body we're doing?

0:30:15.240 --> 0:30:19.040
<v Speaker 3>Arms? And bye up and shoulders?

0:30:20.200 --> 0:30:21.840
<v Speaker 2>How often do you go to gym? How many days

0:30:21.840 --> 0:30:22.120
<v Speaker 2>a week?

0:30:23.880 --> 0:30:25.000
<v Speaker 3>Three days? Right now?

0:30:25.960 --> 0:30:27.400
<v Speaker 2>Okay? What about normally?

0:30:29.680 --> 0:30:31.360
<v Speaker 3>Lomally? Yeah?

0:30:31.400 --> 0:30:33.880
<v Speaker 2>You said right now? What about normally.

0:30:36.440 --> 0:30:41.360
<v Speaker 3>Two days normally, but trying to make three days the standard.

0:30:41.400 --> 0:30:45.960
<v Speaker 2>You know, is anything currently motivating you or inspiring you

0:30:46.000 --> 0:30:47.480
<v Speaker 2>to go to the gym so consistently.

0:30:50.040 --> 0:30:54.800
<v Speaker 3>Uh, I'm just tired of like my clothes being so tight, dude,

0:30:55.080 --> 0:30:57.080
<v Speaker 3>the same. I like being shirtless.

0:30:58.560 --> 0:30:59.480
<v Speaker 2>You like being shirtless?

0:30:59.520 --> 0:30:59.840
<v Speaker 1>Do you look?

0:30:59.840 --> 0:31:00.360
<v Speaker 2>How do you look?

0:31:00.360 --> 0:31:00.560
<v Speaker 3>Shirt?

0:31:00.560 --> 0:31:01.160
<v Speaker 2>It was currently?

0:31:03.000 --> 0:31:07.960
<v Speaker 3>Uh okay, I'm getting there, but I'm okay right now?

0:31:08.400 --> 0:31:11.720
<v Speaker 2>MM what made you want to call me?

0:31:14.440 --> 0:31:16.320
<v Speaker 3>You know? I I've been trying to call you for

0:31:16.360 --> 0:31:19.840
<v Speaker 3>a long time. And I used to have like a

0:31:19.840 --> 0:31:24.920
<v Speaker 3>lot of issues, but that was issues kind of resolved

0:31:25.120 --> 0:31:27.760
<v Speaker 3>and I'm going to like better say now and so

0:31:28.000 --> 0:31:29.880
<v Speaker 3>now I'm just I've just been calling to see like

0:31:30.920 --> 0:31:33.400
<v Speaker 3>if I didn't and I got in like three years later,

0:31:33.640 --> 0:31:37.200
<v Speaker 3>but you know, with those issues. So I do I

0:31:37.240 --> 0:31:38.440
<v Speaker 3>do have a question for you?

0:31:39.560 --> 0:31:39.760
<v Speaker 1>Yeah?

0:31:39.760 --> 0:31:42.320
<v Speaker 2>Please? Yeah, well I have questions for you, but go

0:31:42.640 --> 0:31:43.760
<v Speaker 2>ahead with your question for me.

0:31:45.040 --> 0:31:49.320
<v Speaker 3>Okay. So for me lately, even though I was kind

0:31:49.320 --> 0:31:56.479
<v Speaker 3>of like in a better space, I still feel very lost.

0:31:56.600 --> 0:32:00.600
<v Speaker 3>Like my life is kind of more going with the

0:32:00.680 --> 0:32:07.520
<v Speaker 3>flow then it is structured per se. So I want

0:32:07.560 --> 0:32:11.640
<v Speaker 3>to ask you, you know, do you ever feel lost?

0:32:11.680 --> 0:32:13.360
<v Speaker 3>And like, how do you go about that?

0:32:14.120 --> 0:32:17.320
<v Speaker 2>Dude? I feel lost every fucking day of my life. Yeah,

0:32:17.480 --> 0:32:21.080
<v Speaker 2>of course. Okay, Well I'll answer my question in the

0:32:21.120 --> 0:32:27.880
<v Speaker 2>context of what is what you were doing? So and

0:32:28.200 --> 0:32:32.320
<v Speaker 2>so tell me what issues you were having and then

0:32:32.320 --> 0:32:37.840
<v Speaker 2>how they got resolved. I'm very curious.

0:32:38.600 --> 0:32:43.760
<v Speaker 3>What's it called? Well, I think for starters, I used

0:32:43.800 --> 0:32:49.680
<v Speaker 3>to really compare myself to my friends a lot, so, like,

0:32:50.280 --> 0:32:56.080
<v Speaker 3>you know, right now, I'm twenty seven and all my

0:32:56.360 --> 0:33:00.280
<v Speaker 3>like close friends are married, they're having kids, you know,

0:33:00.320 --> 0:33:03.880
<v Speaker 3>they're getting their their their jobs and their respective fields,

0:33:03.920 --> 0:33:10.880
<v Speaker 3>and I'm kind of just like, no, no, no no partner,

0:33:11.040 --> 0:33:15.160
<v Speaker 3>no no child, no no career. I just got a

0:33:15.160 --> 0:33:17.400
<v Speaker 3>new job. But it's not like in what I went

0:33:17.440 --> 0:33:27.560
<v Speaker 3>to school for, so I you know, just stuff like that,

0:33:29.080 --> 0:33:34.080
<v Speaker 3>and I wouldn't say I don't even know, like I'm

0:33:34.120 --> 0:33:37.560
<v Speaker 3>just I'm just doing my best, you know, so compare

0:33:37.680 --> 0:33:38.520
<v Speaker 3>myself to others.

0:33:38.840 --> 0:33:40.480
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, so how do you feel, Like, how do you

0:33:40.480 --> 0:33:44.520
<v Speaker 2>feel like that issue resolved itself for you?

0:33:46.920 --> 0:33:49.160
<v Speaker 3>I think I've just been kind of thinking of, like,

0:33:50.240 --> 0:33:57.240
<v Speaker 3>you know, what's it called really really thinking, Like, you know,

0:33:57.880 --> 0:34:01.479
<v Speaker 3>I'm a firm believer in everything happens for a reason.

0:34:02.840 --> 0:34:08.120
<v Speaker 3>So I'm thinking I'll just remind myself, you know, like

0:34:09.120 --> 0:34:11.440
<v Speaker 3>I have these feelings now, but it's because you know,

0:34:11.600 --> 0:34:14.879
<v Speaker 3>maybe I'm not I'm not applying myself where I need

0:34:14.920 --> 0:34:17.440
<v Speaker 3>to be, and I'm not taking certain things more seriously.

0:34:20.120 --> 0:34:20.279
<v Speaker 1>You know.

0:34:20.680 --> 0:34:23.600
<v Speaker 3>My physical health was one thing, so I think that's

0:34:23.640 --> 0:34:26.520
<v Speaker 3>like been helping me, you know, going to the gym

0:34:26.560 --> 0:34:35.200
<v Speaker 3>and losing some weight. But what's it called for my

0:34:35.280 --> 0:34:37.239
<v Speaker 3>mental health? You know, I just try and take care

0:34:37.280 --> 0:34:42.520
<v Speaker 3>of it. But it's just in the one where's it.

0:34:42.600 --> 0:34:46.359
<v Speaker 3>We're just just going with emotions, I guess, m hm.

0:34:47.920 --> 0:34:53.160
<v Speaker 2>And how's your like health now?

0:34:53.680 --> 0:34:54.000
<v Speaker 3>All right?

0:34:54.280 --> 0:34:56.280
<v Speaker 2>Like in the I guess in all of the things

0:34:56.320 --> 0:35:00.280
<v Speaker 2>that you were comparing yourself to other people with, like, uh,

0:35:01.400 --> 0:35:04.000
<v Speaker 2>how are they now? Like do you feel like you're

0:35:04.080 --> 0:35:06.600
<v Speaker 2>do you feel better about your your life?

0:35:09.239 --> 0:35:11.759
<v Speaker 3>Twitter? For the most part. You know, I would love

0:35:11.920 --> 0:35:17.600
<v Speaker 3>to have a partner, that's for sure, but uh, you know,

0:35:17.760 --> 0:35:20.719
<v Speaker 3>I'm I think I'm okay with not adding one for now,

0:35:20.920 --> 0:35:25.400
<v Speaker 3>just because you know, everything's a little too expensive, so

0:35:25.520 --> 0:35:29.120
<v Speaker 3>I feel like I wouldn't be able to provide as

0:35:29.200 --> 0:35:34.640
<v Speaker 3>much as I want to. And yeah, a little bit.

0:35:35.160 --> 0:35:42.120
<v Speaker 2>So I but you're getting ripped.

0:35:40.200 --> 0:35:42.000
<v Speaker 3>Doing my best there?

0:35:42.560 --> 0:35:44.920
<v Speaker 2>How do you so? Do you feel you sound? I mean,

0:35:44.920 --> 0:35:46.560
<v Speaker 2>you go to the gym three times a week. You

0:35:46.760 --> 0:35:50.640
<v Speaker 2>sound like a physically attractive guy.

0:35:53.400 --> 0:35:53.799
<v Speaker 3>Thank you?

0:35:54.840 --> 0:35:58.439
<v Speaker 2>Do you? I would? Are you putting yourself out there?

0:35:58.840 --> 0:36:00.799
<v Speaker 2>Are you on the app? So you running around? What

0:36:00.840 --> 0:36:01.279
<v Speaker 2>are you doing?

0:36:03.400 --> 0:36:04.960
<v Speaker 3>I mean, I'm on the apps? But the apps are

0:36:04.960 --> 0:36:06.399
<v Speaker 3>pretty trash. I won't lie to you.

0:36:06.920 --> 0:36:08.640
<v Speaker 2>What's trash about them? I mean, I know I know

0:36:08.680 --> 0:36:12.000
<v Speaker 2>why they're they're they're trap. But you sound I don't know.

0:36:12.560 --> 0:36:15.080
<v Speaker 2>It depends on who you are. You sound like I'm

0:36:15.120 --> 0:36:18.560
<v Speaker 2>picturing you as the kind of guy that does well

0:36:18.560 --> 0:36:20.759
<v Speaker 2>on the apps. There's a kind of guy that does

0:36:20.760 --> 0:36:22.839
<v Speaker 2>well on the apps, and I'm picturing you as that guy.

0:36:22.880 --> 0:36:24.560
<v Speaker 2>I'm just from your voo. I don't know if you

0:36:24.600 --> 0:36:26.319
<v Speaker 2>are that guy, but just from talking to you, from

0:36:26.320 --> 0:36:27.839
<v Speaker 2>what I know about you, you sound like that guy.

0:36:29.640 --> 0:36:31.759
<v Speaker 3>I love that. Thank you, Thank you for that. But

0:36:32.640 --> 0:36:35.879
<v Speaker 3>uh no, I don't get that many swipes. I won't

0:36:35.880 --> 0:36:39.360
<v Speaker 3>lie to you. I think it's because also, like my

0:36:39.440 --> 0:36:42.319
<v Speaker 3>profile is just you know, I think I put a

0:36:42.400 --> 0:36:44.319
<v Speaker 3>decent pictures on it, but I just I don't know,

0:36:44.360 --> 0:36:47.399
<v Speaker 3>I don't I don't take those apps too seriously because

0:36:47.520 --> 0:36:50.200
<v Speaker 3>I've gone on a few dates before, but uh, like

0:36:50.800 --> 0:36:52.560
<v Speaker 3>I kind of got like trauma from one of them,

0:36:52.600 --> 0:36:57.120
<v Speaker 3>so I just take a I take a I don't

0:36:57.120 --> 0:36:58.160
<v Speaker 3>take it seriously anymore.

0:36:58.960 --> 0:37:00.920
<v Speaker 2>What kind of I mean, if you want to talk

0:37:00.960 --> 0:37:02.000
<v Speaker 2>about it? What kind of drama?

0:37:03.360 --> 0:37:09.640
<v Speaker 3>Oo? I mean, what's it called? To make? It?

0:37:09.719 --> 0:37:09.799
<v Speaker 2>Like?

0:37:10.280 --> 0:37:15.120
<v Speaker 3>Not that long of a story. I just I met

0:37:15.160 --> 0:37:19.000
<v Speaker 3>up with this girl. Whoo. At first, I was like,

0:37:19.280 --> 0:37:21.080
<v Speaker 3>you know, hey, I want a relationship. Is this kind

0:37:21.160 --> 0:37:23.640
<v Speaker 3>well we haven't talked for two weeks. I was like, hey,

0:37:23.640 --> 0:37:25.839
<v Speaker 3>I'm kind of like this is where I'm wanting to

0:37:25.920 --> 0:37:28.480
<v Speaker 3>go with this, like it you know, it's just what

0:37:28.640 --> 0:37:31.839
<v Speaker 3>you want to do. And she was like, you know, no,

0:37:31.920 --> 0:37:34.560
<v Speaker 3>not not really, but you're kind of cool, so like

0:37:34.600 --> 0:37:36.440
<v Speaker 3>can we just be friends? And I was like, okay,

0:37:36.680 --> 0:37:40.400
<v Speaker 3>you know that's fine. So she hits me up one

0:37:40.480 --> 0:37:42.120
<v Speaker 3>day to like be like, hey, you want to hang out.

0:37:42.160 --> 0:37:44.480
<v Speaker 3>I was like, yeah, sure, FuG it. So we we

0:37:44.600 --> 0:37:50.920
<v Speaker 3>go we hang out, uh and then you know, afterwards,

0:37:50.960 --> 0:37:52.239
<v Speaker 3>I was like, oh, you know, this is.

0:37:52.160 --> 0:37:57.040
<v Speaker 5>So fun, but I'm gonna go home and she was

0:37:57.080 --> 0:38:00.120
<v Speaker 5>like okay, and then she kind of like me to

0:38:00.280 --> 0:38:04.239
<v Speaker 5>move on me, and then we were gonna like have

0:38:04.360 --> 0:38:06.000
<v Speaker 5>an intercourse in the back of my car.

0:38:07.120 --> 0:38:10.760
<v Speaker 3>And then I couldn't. I couldn't, you know, I couldn't

0:38:10.800 --> 0:38:17.560
<v Speaker 3>stay up. And then uh, and then she she laughed

0:38:17.560 --> 0:38:18.920
<v Speaker 3>and said why is it so small?

0:38:19.480 --> 0:38:23.360
<v Speaker 2>She she laughed at you.

0:38:23.480 --> 0:38:26.360
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, dude, Yeah.

0:38:26.480 --> 0:38:30.719
<v Speaker 2>Oh my dude, she dude. Listen. First of all, just

0:38:30.760 --> 0:38:37.480
<v Speaker 2>so you know, I'm I'm picturing you as as uh again,

0:38:37.600 --> 0:38:42.440
<v Speaker 2>like I'm picturing you as a beautiful man on the

0:38:42.440 --> 0:38:45.799
<v Speaker 2>other end of this phone. You are a beautiful man

0:38:45.840 --> 0:38:48.120
<v Speaker 2>on the other end of this phone. I can't she

0:38:48.320 --> 0:38:53.320
<v Speaker 2>laughed at you, man, damn fuck, damn doubt.

0:38:53.360 --> 0:38:55.959
<v Speaker 3>I think it was like an awkward situational laugh.

0:38:56.080 --> 0:38:59.399
<v Speaker 2>But you know, she laughed nonetheless, and she said why

0:38:59.440 --> 0:39:00.440
<v Speaker 2>are you so small?

0:39:01.960 --> 0:39:05.600
<v Speaker 3>She's along the lines of that, guess like, why is

0:39:05.640 --> 0:39:06.360
<v Speaker 3>it so small?

0:39:06.760 --> 0:39:11.879
<v Speaker 2>Or damn, damn damn. How did you react? That must

0:39:11.960 --> 0:39:13.200
<v Speaker 2>have Yeah, that's fucked up.

0:39:15.080 --> 0:39:19.520
<v Speaker 3>I just I was just like, uh, you know, I

0:39:19.520 --> 0:39:23.520
<v Speaker 3>think I'm just gonna go home now, damn. And then

0:39:23.920 --> 0:39:26.160
<v Speaker 3>you know, I was on the drove, so it was

0:39:26.200 --> 0:39:27.279
<v Speaker 3>an awkward drive home.

0:39:27.440 --> 0:39:29.120
<v Speaker 2>Oh no, you had to drive home?

0:39:31.160 --> 0:39:34.560
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, yeah, damn.

0:39:34.880 --> 0:39:37.760
<v Speaker 2>But that's good. But you know what, it's she revealed.

0:39:37.800 --> 0:39:40.600
<v Speaker 2>It's like because you wanted a relationship with her, but

0:39:40.680 --> 0:39:43.600
<v Speaker 2>she revealed herself in that moment, you know what I mean.

0:39:43.800 --> 0:39:45.960
<v Speaker 2>So it was almost like a good thing that she

0:39:46.200 --> 0:39:48.439
<v Speaker 2>like because you could have got imagine you like got

0:39:48.440 --> 0:39:51.200
<v Speaker 2>deep into a relationship with her or like you started

0:39:51.239 --> 0:39:54.759
<v Speaker 2>really developing feelings for her in some fucking way, and

0:39:54.760 --> 0:39:56.239
<v Speaker 2>then she pulled some shit like that on you.

0:39:56.239 --> 0:40:00.600
<v Speaker 3>You know, yeah, that would have been brutal for sure.

0:40:01.360 --> 0:40:01.719
<v Speaker 3>M hm.

0:40:04.239 --> 0:40:04.479
<v Speaker 1>Hmm.

0:40:07.840 --> 0:40:09.680
<v Speaker 3>We keep it moving forward.

0:40:09.880 --> 0:40:12.600
<v Speaker 2>Okay, I listen. I don't think that I don't think

0:40:12.640 --> 0:40:15.960
<v Speaker 2>every woman on the apps is going to be like, oh,

0:40:16.000 --> 0:40:22.239
<v Speaker 2>your ship is small, you know, Oh yeah, I think

0:40:22.280 --> 0:40:25.200
<v Speaker 2>you can find you. I think that there are some

0:40:25.280 --> 0:40:28.759
<v Speaker 2>ladies out there who are like, whatever you got, right, like,

0:40:28.840 --> 0:40:30.319
<v Speaker 2>no matter who you were, I mean you know this,

0:40:30.440 --> 0:40:33.560
<v Speaker 2>right like, no matter who you are, there's someone out

0:40:33.600 --> 0:40:37.560
<v Speaker 2>there that like, what you got is what they what

0:40:37.600 --> 0:40:39.440
<v Speaker 2>they're looking for, you know what I'm saying.

0:40:41.080 --> 0:40:44.360
<v Speaker 3>Real hmm okay?

0:40:44.800 --> 0:40:47.920
<v Speaker 2>Was that part of was that was that that sounds

0:40:47.960 --> 0:40:49.960
<v Speaker 2>like something that would cause me to go to the

0:40:50.080 --> 0:40:51.799
<v Speaker 2>start going to the gym three times a week? Was

0:40:51.840 --> 0:40:53.239
<v Speaker 2>that a catalyst.

0:40:55.040 --> 0:40:57.359
<v Speaker 3>Uh, this happened like three years ago.

0:40:58.080 --> 0:40:58.799
<v Speaker 2>Three years ago.

0:41:00.360 --> 0:41:04.200
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, yeah, after that, I was just like let me,

0:41:04.320 --> 0:41:06.719
<v Speaker 3>let me I prefer like a long time, I was like,

0:41:06.800 --> 0:41:08.600
<v Speaker 3>let me not be on these apps, so let me

0:41:08.680 --> 0:41:12.560
<v Speaker 3>kind of like do my own thing. And it was

0:41:12.600 --> 0:41:14.319
<v Speaker 3>a thing where I was like, oh, I should really

0:41:14.360 --> 0:41:18.040
<v Speaker 3>like exercise after that, but I have like I have

0:41:18.160 --> 0:41:24.000
<v Speaker 3>like pretty bad ADHD and I was like very unhealthy

0:41:24.080 --> 0:41:27.560
<v Speaker 3>and like under and over stimulated like all the time.

0:41:29.960 --> 0:41:32.759
<v Speaker 3>So after a while, I've kind of like focused on

0:41:33.840 --> 0:41:38.360
<v Speaker 3>that and then now like I'm able to put my

0:41:38.520 --> 0:41:45.400
<v Speaker 3>attention into certain things a little better. But it was

0:41:45.440 --> 0:41:48.040
<v Speaker 3>a catalyst, but it took like fucking you know, like

0:41:48.080 --> 0:41:53.359
<v Speaker 3>two three years, two years to really get the the

0:41:53.360 --> 0:41:54.760
<v Speaker 3>ball rolling in the sense.

0:41:55.640 --> 0:41:57.239
<v Speaker 1>H m hm.

0:42:02.040 --> 0:42:08.640
<v Speaker 2>So are you excited about the future now?

0:42:11.160 --> 0:42:11.600
<v Speaker 3>I think so?

0:42:12.080 --> 0:42:15.879
<v Speaker 1>You know, Oh, what was your sorry?

0:42:15.920 --> 0:42:18.040
<v Speaker 2>Sorry? Go ahead, I'm not I should interrupt you. Go ahead.

0:42:18.280 --> 0:42:20.120
<v Speaker 3>No, No, I don't even know what I'm sorry about.

0:42:20.120 --> 0:42:20.920
<v Speaker 3>That feel free.

0:42:21.480 --> 0:42:22.960
<v Speaker 2>Well, I was gonna say, Okay, you asked me a

0:42:23.040 --> 0:42:26.520
<v Speaker 2>question earlier, and I kind of avoided it, but because

0:42:26.520 --> 0:42:29.000
<v Speaker 2>I wanted to hear what you wanted to say. But

0:42:29.040 --> 0:42:31.080
<v Speaker 2>now that I've heard what you wanted to say. What

0:42:31.200 --> 0:42:34.000
<v Speaker 2>was the question you asked me if ever felt lost?

0:42:34.719 --> 0:42:34.959
<v Speaker 3>Yeah?

0:42:35.960 --> 0:42:39.040
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, I feel lost all the time. Actually, And it's

0:42:39.080 --> 0:42:44.640
<v Speaker 2>funny because you can, dude, I don't know. I actually

0:42:44.640 --> 0:42:47.360
<v Speaker 2>feel as the older I get, the less I feel qualified.

0:42:47.360 --> 0:42:49.680
<v Speaker 2>I mean I was never qualified or or even claimed

0:42:49.680 --> 0:42:52.080
<v Speaker 2>I was qualified to like or I don't even like

0:42:52.120 --> 0:42:54.160
<v Speaker 2>whatever to do a podcast like this, Like I you know,

0:42:54.200 --> 0:42:56.799
<v Speaker 2>it's not even like it's a whatever. I've done this

0:42:56.840 --> 0:42:59.400
<v Speaker 2>disclaimer a million times, but like, yeah, I don't know

0:42:59.400 --> 0:43:04.800
<v Speaker 2>where the fuck uh my life goes. I've been I

0:43:04.840 --> 0:43:08.040
<v Speaker 2>feel like I've been lost for a while. The older

0:43:08.040 --> 0:43:10.040
<v Speaker 2>I get, the more lost I feel the more. And

0:43:10.320 --> 0:43:15.040
<v Speaker 2>it kind of makes sense because at some point you

0:43:15.120 --> 0:43:18.520
<v Speaker 2>have to declare a major. You have to make you

0:43:18.800 --> 0:43:22.400
<v Speaker 2>do have to like make decisions and like stick to

0:43:22.440 --> 0:43:26.080
<v Speaker 2>them and like learn to be comfortable with the ones

0:43:26.160 --> 0:43:30.680
<v Speaker 2>you did not choose. And that's something I struggle with

0:43:31.800 --> 0:43:40.959
<v Speaker 2>severely and do believe has caused me strife. I would

0:43:41.040 --> 0:43:49.080
<v Speaker 2>say it's part of uh feeling lost for sure. So

0:43:50.239 --> 0:43:52.280
<v Speaker 2>I mean, yeah, I feel I feel lost all the time.

0:43:52.560 --> 0:43:55.040
<v Speaker 2>But also, you know what I've been doing lately is

0:43:56.719 --> 0:43:58.120
<v Speaker 2>this is how this is kind of helping me feel

0:43:58.120 --> 0:44:00.759
<v Speaker 2>a little bit less lost. And I'm still too I

0:44:00.800 --> 0:44:04.680
<v Speaker 2>still feel like I'm too anxious to like, uh, really

0:44:04.719 --> 0:44:09.120
<v Speaker 2>take action upon these feelings. But I'm like, dude, I'm

0:44:09.120 --> 0:44:12.399
<v Speaker 2>trying to stop like faking it till I make it.

0:44:13.160 --> 0:44:15.120
<v Speaker 2>Do you know what I'm saying in terms of like

0:44:15.120 --> 0:44:19.360
<v Speaker 2>I'm trying to stop faking how I feel like I

0:44:19.400 --> 0:44:24.760
<v Speaker 2>can't predict like if I fucking hate something, I can't

0:44:24.800 --> 0:44:29.120
<v Speaker 2>pretend like I don't anymore. It's really hard. Or if

0:44:29.120 --> 0:44:32.720
<v Speaker 2>I fucking like, like my I feel in my gut

0:44:32.880 --> 0:44:37.680
<v Speaker 2>so deeply when I fucking hate something, and I feel

0:44:37.680 --> 0:44:41.920
<v Speaker 2>in my gut so deeply when I fucking love something,

0:44:42.719 --> 0:44:49.320
<v Speaker 2>and I'm just like, I'm like surrendering to those feelings. Nowadays,

0:44:49.520 --> 0:44:49.839
<v Speaker 2>I'm not.

0:44:50.000 --> 0:44:50.319
<v Speaker 3>I'm not.

0:44:54.880 --> 0:45:01.799
<v Speaker 2>I feel like I'm still too maybe cowardly to like

0:45:01.960 --> 0:45:05.440
<v Speaker 2>live my life in full alignment of those feelings because

0:45:05.480 --> 0:45:08.280
<v Speaker 2>something feels like there's I like, I get too interested,

0:45:08.360 --> 0:45:14.840
<v Speaker 2>I get too thinky about everything surrounding those feelings. But like, uh,

0:45:15.000 --> 0:45:16.680
<v Speaker 2>you know, I feel like I walk around New York

0:45:16.920 --> 0:45:20.280
<v Speaker 2>and I look around and I'm like, I fucking love

0:45:21.200 --> 0:45:24.560
<v Speaker 2>living here, Like I love this shit. I love being

0:45:24.760 --> 0:45:27.040
<v Speaker 2>like I feel like in deep alignment with that shit, right,

0:45:27.120 --> 0:45:28.440
<v Speaker 2>And then I've other things in my life trying to

0:45:28.440 --> 0:45:32.360
<v Speaker 2>think of some shit like like I'm just trying to

0:45:32.440 --> 0:45:36.279
<v Speaker 2>get some low stakes shit like uh oh, or like

0:45:36.320 --> 0:45:39.799
<v Speaker 2>I'll be at like a event or like talking to

0:45:39.880 --> 0:45:43.680
<v Speaker 2>someone or maybe you know what I'm out at, like, uh,

0:45:44.719 --> 0:45:47.000
<v Speaker 2>I don't. I don't go to the club. But let's

0:45:47.000 --> 0:45:48.920
<v Speaker 2>say I'm at the club or some shit, or I'm

0:45:48.960 --> 0:45:50.759
<v Speaker 2>at a party or something, what is something like that,

0:45:50.840 --> 0:45:54.440
<v Speaker 2>I'll be like, I fucking hate being here, I fucking

0:45:54.640 --> 0:45:58.880
<v Speaker 2>hate talking to this person right now, I fucking hate

0:45:59.600 --> 0:46:03.719
<v Speaker 2>whatever this is, and I'll just leave, like I don't.

0:46:03.800 --> 0:46:12.960
<v Speaker 2>I won't kind of fake myself into things anymore, you know,

0:46:13.719 --> 0:46:16.200
<v Speaker 2>Like I feel alignment in my gut, and I've tried

0:46:16.239 --> 0:46:21.960
<v Speaker 2>to do this thing of let me I've tried to

0:46:22.000 --> 0:46:28.120
<v Speaker 2>do this thing of like let me just pretend like

0:46:28.200 --> 0:46:32.799
<v Speaker 2>I don't and let me just try to enjoy exactly

0:46:32.840 --> 0:46:38.880
<v Speaker 2>where I am. Like it's the it's the duality of

0:46:39.200 --> 0:46:42.120
<v Speaker 2>uh wanting to like be comfortable, wanting to like enjoy

0:46:42.160 --> 0:46:45.319
<v Speaker 2>your life as it is, but also wanting to feel

0:46:45.320 --> 0:46:48.279
<v Speaker 2>aligned in it. These these are these are things that

0:46:48.320 --> 0:46:55.160
<v Speaker 2>make me feel very lost. Is this uh choice between

0:46:55.160 --> 0:46:57.480
<v Speaker 2>the two. But I'm trying to really listen when my

0:46:57.560 --> 0:47:00.359
<v Speaker 2>body in my brain are telling me when I love something,

0:47:00.360 --> 0:47:03.880
<v Speaker 2>I'm gonna hate something. But then you can you can

0:47:03.960 --> 0:47:07.720
<v Speaker 2>have logic behind, like why you should still do things

0:47:08.800 --> 0:47:11.719
<v Speaker 2>that you hate. I don't think you get I don't

0:47:11.760 --> 0:47:12.920
<v Speaker 2>know if you get out of that. I don't know

0:47:12.960 --> 0:47:15.000
<v Speaker 2>if that's possible to like have a life where you

0:47:15.040 --> 0:47:18.759
<v Speaker 2>never ever do anything that you hate and you only

0:47:18.800 --> 0:47:21.560
<v Speaker 2>do things you love, but then you see people do it,

0:47:22.440 --> 0:47:24.000
<v Speaker 2>and then you're like and then also also do I

0:47:24.040 --> 0:47:27.640
<v Speaker 2>think a lot of it is like this, dude, this

0:47:27.719 --> 0:47:37.880
<v Speaker 2>sounds everythink I'm saying. It sounds so uh like motivational speaker.

0:47:37.920 --> 0:47:38.040
<v Speaker 5>Ye.

0:47:38.640 --> 0:47:41.359
<v Speaker 2>But I'm starting to get it because I've heard people

0:47:41.360 --> 0:47:43.120
<v Speaker 2>say this shit before. You know, the shit of like

0:47:44.640 --> 0:47:48.560
<v Speaker 2>feeling like you deserve they have a life where you

0:47:49.200 --> 0:47:55.799
<v Speaker 2>that you like like or feeling like you deserve, uh,

0:47:56.480 --> 0:47:59.239
<v Speaker 2>things like you deserve, like feeling like you deserve to

0:47:59.320 --> 0:48:03.040
<v Speaker 2>have a good life. Okay, you know, have you ever

0:48:03.080 --> 0:48:04.399
<v Speaker 2>heard that people talking about that ship?

0:48:05.560 --> 0:48:05.799
<v Speaker 3>Yes?

0:48:05.920 --> 0:48:06.600
<v Speaker 1>I have heard of that.

0:48:07.239 --> 0:48:08.200
<v Speaker 2>What do you think about that?

0:48:10.280 --> 0:48:15.200
<v Speaker 3>I feel like you can't really have those thoughts unless

0:48:15.239 --> 0:48:17.680
<v Speaker 3>like you're you work towards it, you know.

0:48:18.239 --> 0:48:18.879
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, Like.

0:48:20.320 --> 0:48:23.440
<v Speaker 3>If you're going through life and you're like, man, I

0:48:23.480 --> 0:48:26.759
<v Speaker 3>should be rich by now, but you haven't done.

0:48:26.960 --> 0:48:31.160
<v Speaker 2>It's not. Okay, it's not. It's not like an entitlement

0:48:31.239 --> 0:48:33.520
<v Speaker 2>thing though. It's not like I don't look at it

0:48:33.560 --> 0:48:37.040
<v Speaker 2>like it's like a It's kind of this spiritual ish

0:48:37.280 --> 0:48:40.719
<v Speaker 2>thing of like looking at like because sometimes you can

0:48:40.719 --> 0:48:43.719
<v Speaker 2>look at yourself and be like uh, because you can

0:48:43.880 --> 0:48:47.680
<v Speaker 2>be someone that works really hard and still be like

0:48:47.920 --> 0:48:53.680
<v Speaker 2>I'm a fucking piece of shits, you know. But it's

0:48:53.680 --> 0:48:55.480
<v Speaker 2>like a spiritual thing of like do I do I

0:48:55.640 --> 0:49:00.320
<v Speaker 2>as a human being feel? That's dude, that when people

0:49:00.320 --> 0:49:03.359
<v Speaker 2>say ship like you're enough, Dude, I'm sorry, I'm going

0:49:03.400 --> 0:49:07.120
<v Speaker 2>I'm going like I drink a Celsius and I'm going

0:49:07.160 --> 0:49:09.640
<v Speaker 2>full therapy mode on you right now.

0:49:09.719 --> 0:49:12.480
<v Speaker 3>No. I love this. I'm also drinking, well, I'm drinking

0:49:12.520 --> 0:49:15.359
<v Speaker 3>the Costco variant of Celsius.

0:49:15.400 --> 0:49:18.040
<v Speaker 2>What's the Costco variant of Celsius.

0:49:18.560 --> 0:49:22.240
<v Speaker 3>It's called Kirkland Signature Sparkling Energy Drink.

0:49:22.880 --> 0:49:25.080
<v Speaker 2>WHOA how many grams of the how much caffeine is

0:49:25.080 --> 0:49:26.279
<v Speaker 2>in it?

0:49:26.480 --> 0:49:27.280
<v Speaker 3>Two hundred?

0:49:27.560 --> 0:49:27.600
<v Speaker 1>With?

0:49:27.840 --> 0:49:32.399
<v Speaker 2>Okay, all right, Okay, sounds like we're on the same

0:49:32.640 --> 0:49:34.719
<v Speaker 2>sounds like we're on the same wavelength. Here, sounds like

0:49:34.719 --> 0:49:36.680
<v Speaker 2>we're on the same I got my dude, this is

0:49:36.719 --> 0:49:42.279
<v Speaker 2>not an advertisement, but I just I'm trying the I love.

0:49:42.280 --> 0:49:45.200
<v Speaker 2>I'm a big Celsius guy. Although I might switch, I

0:49:45.280 --> 0:49:47.160
<v Speaker 2>might go by, I might start buying the Kirkland ship

0:49:47.200 --> 0:49:49.000
<v Speaker 2>because there's no it sounds like it's the same ship.

0:49:50.160 --> 0:49:51.400
<v Speaker 2>Is it good? What's the flavor?

0:49:53.040 --> 0:49:57.360
<v Speaker 3>I'm drinking tropical and it's like a pineapple, starfruit, mango

0:49:57.480 --> 0:50:01.520
<v Speaker 3>kind of thing. Nice. It does have taurine in it,

0:50:01.600 --> 0:50:03.279
<v Speaker 3>so it kind of has like a like a red

0:50:03.280 --> 0:50:04.359
<v Speaker 3>Bully taste to it.

0:50:04.480 --> 0:50:08.919
<v Speaker 2>Oh okay, yeah, that's the thing I like about. Again,

0:50:08.960 --> 0:50:10.879
<v Speaker 2>it's not a Celsius ad, but that's what I like about.

0:50:10.880 --> 0:50:12.799
<v Speaker 2>Celsius doesn't have the tar Oh wait, no, it's wait no,

0:50:12.840 --> 0:50:15.120
<v Speaker 2>it totally has tarn in it. Wait, it absolutely one

0:50:15.160 --> 0:50:18.040
<v Speaker 2>hundred percent has taurine in it. Dude, what the fuck?

0:50:18.400 --> 0:50:21.560
<v Speaker 2>What is taurine? Because yeah, I don't like the red

0:50:21.600 --> 0:50:23.080
<v Speaker 2>bull I mean, I do like the red bull taste,

0:50:23.080 --> 0:50:25.000
<v Speaker 2>but it makes it feel like I shouldn't be drinking it.

0:50:25.040 --> 0:50:30.880
<v Speaker 2>What is taurine Taurine is an abundant, naturally occurring sulfur

0:50:31.080 --> 0:50:41.920
<v Speaker 2>containing amino acid found throughout the human body. Google says

0:50:42.440 --> 0:50:46.680
<v Speaker 2>it's healthy for most adults to take taurine every day.

0:50:46.800 --> 0:50:55.160
<v Speaker 2>But that's totally not true, right, Wow, it can't be true.

0:50:56.320 --> 0:50:58.520
<v Speaker 3>I used to have a friend who told me taurine

0:50:58.600 --> 0:50:59.920
<v Speaker 3>was made out of bull spirit.

0:51:01.280 --> 0:51:03.600
<v Speaker 2>I believe that. I still I would still believe your

0:51:03.600 --> 0:51:04.440
<v Speaker 2>friend over Google.

0:51:07.840 --> 0:51:08.640
<v Speaker 3>That's very real of you.

0:51:09.760 --> 0:51:15.000
<v Speaker 2>This the thing of like, like I guess believing because

0:51:15.000 --> 0:51:17.759
<v Speaker 2>sometimes because like I look around and I'm like, as

0:51:17.800 --> 0:51:19.440
<v Speaker 2>I get older, I'm I think when I was younger,

0:51:19.440 --> 0:51:21.719
<v Speaker 2>I used to have this thing of like, uh, I

0:51:21.840 --> 0:51:27.040
<v Speaker 2>used to believe more that I deserve the good life

0:51:27.080 --> 0:51:31.600
<v Speaker 2>when I was younger, and then as I've gotten older,

0:51:32.480 --> 0:51:35.160
<v Speaker 2>I believe it. And again this is something do with

0:51:35.200 --> 0:51:39.400
<v Speaker 2>like entitlement or like work ethic. It kind of like

0:51:39.400 --> 0:51:41.759
<v Speaker 2>it's kind of like a step before that. It's like

0:51:42.680 --> 0:51:45.560
<v Speaker 2>you you get a little older, and then I'm start

0:51:45.600 --> 0:51:48.800
<v Speaker 2>having these feelings where I'm like, man, I'm not fucking special,

0:51:48.920 --> 0:51:52.120
<v Speaker 2>Like I'm just some fucking asshole, Like who am I

0:51:52.160 --> 0:51:56.920
<v Speaker 2>to want a good life? Or who am I to

0:51:56.960 --> 0:51:58.600
<v Speaker 2>like feel like I deserve a good life.

0:51:59.239 --> 0:51:59.440
<v Speaker 3>You know.

0:52:00.160 --> 0:52:02.719
<v Speaker 2>Now, I think that kind of self talk it like

0:52:02.800 --> 0:52:08.520
<v Speaker 2>I actually I believe that that is bad. I believe

0:52:08.560 --> 0:52:11.239
<v Speaker 2>it is worth. I believe it is bad. It is

0:52:11.320 --> 0:52:15.520
<v Speaker 2>self talk that I have, and I believe it is bad.

0:52:15.600 --> 0:52:17.719
<v Speaker 2>So it's not like an entitlement. So the like the

0:52:18.000 --> 0:52:20.080
<v Speaker 2>to believe you deserve a good life. I don't think

0:52:20.080 --> 0:52:23.680
<v Speaker 2>it's like a thing of like, oh I deserve to

0:52:23.680 --> 0:52:26.040
<v Speaker 2>be rich tomorrow. Oh I deserve this. I deserve that

0:52:26.480 --> 0:52:29.480
<v Speaker 2>it comes. Actually, I feel like it comes before the

0:52:29.600 --> 0:52:32.200
<v Speaker 2>work in some way where you have to go, like

0:52:33.320 --> 0:52:40.840
<v Speaker 2>you have to rewire your fucking brain to be like, yes, uh,

0:52:40.880 --> 0:52:44.440
<v Speaker 2>there's you know, the fucking kids dying in the Middle East,

0:52:44.560 --> 0:52:48.600
<v Speaker 2>and yes, there's a billion other people and you are

0:52:48.760 --> 0:52:53.000
<v Speaker 2>just some asshole, and yes, uh, you know, I'm infinite,

0:52:53.040 --> 0:52:59.360
<v Speaker 2>I'm infinitely small, and you know whatever. But spiritually I

0:52:59.480 --> 0:53:06.160
<v Speaker 2>have for whatever fucking reason, I am piloting the consciousness

0:53:06.239 --> 0:53:11.440
<v Speaker 2>of myself that is the one thing in the you,

0:53:11.680 --> 0:53:14.360
<v Speaker 2>my own fucking lives, the one thing in the fucking

0:53:14.520 --> 0:53:20.440
<v Speaker 2>universe that I like can control and like am and

0:53:20.480 --> 0:53:23.360
<v Speaker 2>I am like, yes, some asshole, but I am making

0:53:23.440 --> 0:53:29.920
<v Speaker 2>the executive decision that for some power beyond me. I

0:53:29.960 --> 0:53:32.640
<v Speaker 2>have been put into this body and this brain and

0:53:32.640 --> 0:53:38.680
<v Speaker 2>this consciousness, and it is my divine duty to like

0:53:39.360 --> 0:53:43.879
<v Speaker 2>treat myself the best as possible and strive to have

0:53:44.719 --> 0:53:50.280
<v Speaker 2>a good life. And for that reason, I will find

0:53:50.400 --> 0:53:54.280
<v Speaker 2>myself to be deserving of having a good life, because

0:53:54.360 --> 0:53:59.160
<v Speaker 2>I'm the only thing that I can be from like

0:53:59.200 --> 0:54:05.120
<v Speaker 2>a fucking like divine perspective. Does that make sense? Am

0:54:05.160 --> 0:54:06.359
<v Speaker 2>I insane? That makes sense?

0:54:06.440 --> 0:54:10.160
<v Speaker 3>Right? No? I love that. I really really, I really

0:54:10.200 --> 0:54:11.840
<v Speaker 3>resonate with what you're saying right now.

0:54:12.560 --> 0:54:15.600
<v Speaker 2>Dude, I like, listen, I feel this way because I

0:54:15.640 --> 0:54:18.680
<v Speaker 2>am on two hundred milligrams of caffeine right now. I

0:54:18.719 --> 0:54:21.400
<v Speaker 2>want to feel that way every day. I literally I

0:54:21.680 --> 0:54:23.040
<v Speaker 2>maybe this is I don't know if I'm bipolar, I

0:54:23.040 --> 0:54:27.680
<v Speaker 2>don't know what. But I literally oscillate between like really

0:54:27.719 --> 0:54:30.360
<v Speaker 2>feeling what I just said, which feels like a healthy

0:54:30.480 --> 0:54:35.800
<v Speaker 2>amount of ego to have, and then the other thing.

0:54:37.080 --> 0:54:38.839
<v Speaker 2>I feel it all that I feel like I feel

0:54:38.840 --> 0:54:43.560
<v Speaker 2>like lately I've been feeling more the other thing, which

0:54:43.640 --> 0:54:46.720
<v Speaker 2>tells me I'm just some fucking asshole and why should

0:54:46.760 --> 0:54:49.359
<v Speaker 2>I you know, but that that's like ego too, right,

0:54:49.480 --> 0:54:54.200
<v Speaker 2>isn't that more that's like an unhealthy amount of Like

0:54:54.200 --> 0:54:56.640
<v Speaker 2>that's not good. That's not good for anyone, right.

0:54:58.880 --> 0:55:00.799
<v Speaker 3>I feel like you gotta have a little though, Like

0:55:00.880 --> 0:55:02.080
<v Speaker 3>I agree.

0:55:02.000 --> 0:55:03.759
<v Speaker 2>I agree, I agree, I agree. You have to hate.

0:55:03.760 --> 0:55:07.319
<v Speaker 2>I I also do believe like you have to, you

0:55:07.320 --> 0:55:09.640
<v Speaker 2>have to be humbled in some sense because you ever

0:55:09.680 --> 0:55:14.239
<v Speaker 2>meet someone and they have no they don't hate themselves

0:55:14.280 --> 0:55:17.160
<v Speaker 2>even a little bit. I can't. I can't. I can't.

0:55:17.200 --> 0:55:21.320
<v Speaker 3>Oh yeah, it feels like they're larking at some point.

0:55:21.600 --> 0:55:31.359
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, definitely, But you know, I do want to.

0:55:31.600 --> 0:55:35.840
<v Speaker 3>You know know, uh, I very much do love your content.

0:55:36.400 --> 0:55:38.640
<v Speaker 3>And at some points I get a little I get

0:55:38.640 --> 0:55:41.879
<v Speaker 3>a little envious because of how often you travel mm hmm.

0:55:42.880 --> 0:55:45.480
<v Speaker 3>And sometimes I'm like damn, you know, because well I

0:55:45.480 --> 0:55:47.680
<v Speaker 3>don't think I told you, but like I have, like

0:55:47.840 --> 0:55:49.719
<v Speaker 3>I have a bachelor's in social work because I'm trying

0:55:49.719 --> 0:55:52.479
<v Speaker 3>to get into social work and whatnot. Yeah, so I'm like, fuck,

0:55:53.400 --> 0:55:56.160
<v Speaker 3>like he was doing he was doing some ship that

0:55:56.280 --> 0:56:00.279
<v Speaker 3>like I kind of want to do mhm. But you know,

0:56:01.120 --> 0:56:04.480
<v Speaker 3>I ain't. I ain't built like that built like what

0:56:06.400 --> 0:56:08.440
<v Speaker 3>like the whole like social media thing, Like I kind

0:56:08.440 --> 0:56:10.240
<v Speaker 3>of suck a a oh.

0:56:10.160 --> 0:56:18.200
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, yeah, yeah, I one thing that is inherent in

0:56:18.239 --> 0:56:21.960
<v Speaker 2>my wiring, like from like I kind of I get

0:56:22.000 --> 0:56:26.160
<v Speaker 2>it from my dad. Actually is like fucking yeah, like

0:56:26.200 --> 0:56:31.799
<v Speaker 2>the marketing ship you know, like do it like how

0:56:31.800 --> 0:56:35.000
<v Speaker 2>to fucking like because yeah, it is. It is kind

0:56:35.000 --> 0:56:37.960
<v Speaker 2>of a thing and like to today's day and age,

0:56:38.000 --> 0:56:42.319
<v Speaker 2>I suppose where like if you want to you do

0:56:42.400 --> 0:56:47.080
<v Speaker 2>have to like learn the the the tricks of social

0:56:47.160 --> 0:56:53.520
<v Speaker 2>media and marketing and you know, uh funnels and algorithms

0:56:53.560 --> 0:57:00.880
<v Speaker 2>and shit like that to like enable you to like

0:57:01.000 --> 0:57:05.160
<v Speaker 2>do the actual work you want to do. Like yeah,

0:57:05.160 --> 0:57:07.880
<v Speaker 2>when I was growing up, my dad, like when I

0:57:07.880 --> 0:57:10.000
<v Speaker 2>was in middle school in high school, my dad like

0:57:10.080 --> 0:57:12.320
<v Speaker 2>hired me to like help him run his like Facebook

0:57:12.360 --> 0:57:18.920
<v Speaker 2>account and his like email funnels and his like YouTube shit.

0:57:19.360 --> 0:57:21.080
<v Speaker 2>So that's how I got into being like, oh, let

0:57:21.120 --> 0:57:23.920
<v Speaker 2>me like collect people's emails so I can message them

0:57:23.960 --> 0:57:27.320
<v Speaker 2>when I have a tour, or oh I can I

0:57:27.360 --> 0:57:32.840
<v Speaker 2>can utilize the attension that I get on one platform

0:57:33.000 --> 0:57:40.280
<v Speaker 2>and funnel it into another platform. And yeah, I've I'm

0:57:40.360 --> 0:57:45.320
<v Speaker 2>lucky that like I that like brain, Like some people,

0:57:45.520 --> 0:57:47.360
<v Speaker 2>I'm lucky that I kind of grew up like wired

0:57:48.240 --> 0:57:51.440
<v Speaker 2>for that brain. A little bit, but I totally get

0:57:51.880 --> 0:57:56.640
<v Speaker 2>it's it's at the like, after a certain point, I

0:57:56.840 --> 0:58:05.880
<v Speaker 2>do like that brain that like version of thinking. It

0:58:06.160 --> 0:58:08.200
<v Speaker 2>can it can lead you to a point where you're like,

0:58:09.120 --> 0:58:11.120
<v Speaker 2>like there has to be something underneath it that you're

0:58:11.120 --> 0:58:13.960
<v Speaker 2>like actually doing, because I see people who they get

0:58:14.000 --> 0:58:16.160
<v Speaker 2>into that brain of like oh how do I like

0:58:16.200 --> 0:58:20.080
<v Speaker 2>get views or whatever? But like under like that whole

0:58:20.480 --> 0:58:22.360
<v Speaker 2>like marketing brain or whatever, it has to be like

0:58:23.240 --> 0:58:27.560
<v Speaker 2>something that props up like a real thing that you're doing,

0:58:28.400 --> 0:58:31.920
<v Speaker 2>like fucking you know, like music or if you have

0:58:31.960 --> 0:58:36.240
<v Speaker 2>like a movie that you made, or like a book

0:58:36.320 --> 0:58:40.040
<v Speaker 2>you wrote, or like I you know, I guess a

0:58:40.080 --> 0:58:42.200
<v Speaker 2>podcast or whatever, like something like it has to be

0:58:42.240 --> 0:58:45.640
<v Speaker 2>propped up by like something that you're actually doing, because

0:58:45.640 --> 0:58:48.320
<v Speaker 2>if all you have is the marketing thing, it's like

0:58:48.320 --> 0:58:51.040
<v Speaker 2>what am I even doing right now?

0:58:51.080 --> 0:58:53.080
<v Speaker 3>You know? Right?

0:58:54.840 --> 0:58:56.480
<v Speaker 2>Sorry, I feel like I keep going on rants.

0:58:57.680 --> 0:58:58.360
<v Speaker 3>No, I love that.

0:59:02.120 --> 0:59:04.320
<v Speaker 2>Wait, let's talk more about you. Sorry, I'm being a

0:59:04.320 --> 0:59:12.800
<v Speaker 2>fucking crazy person right now. Now you're cool, okay, all right,

0:59:13.360 --> 0:59:14.800
<v Speaker 2>tell me more about what you want to do. Let's

0:59:14.800 --> 0:59:17.400
<v Speaker 2>talk about you. I gotta stop, I gotta, I gotta

0:59:17.440 --> 0:59:23.320
<v Speaker 2>stop drinking energy drinks before the fucking podcast.

0:59:23.600 --> 0:59:28.400
<v Speaker 3>Now you're show I don't even know, bro, because like, well,

0:59:29.480 --> 0:59:31.240
<v Speaker 3>for social work, right now, I have to go back

0:59:31.240 --> 0:59:35.280
<v Speaker 3>to it to get my master's. Right, Well, I don't

0:59:35.320 --> 0:59:37.320
<v Speaker 3>have to do it, but it's better if I do

0:59:37.400 --> 0:59:43.200
<v Speaker 3>so because there's more opportunities. Right. But like recently, what

0:59:43.280 --> 0:59:46.200
<v Speaker 3>had happened to me is I had applied so I

0:59:46.240 --> 0:59:49.960
<v Speaker 3>live in I live in Cali, but I had applied

0:59:50.520 --> 0:59:57.280
<v Speaker 3>for a probational like job social work position in in Honolulu.

0:59:57.480 --> 0:59:59.560
<v Speaker 2>Why you know, oh cool, cool.

1:00:00.920 --> 1:00:04.120
<v Speaker 3>Right, it's sick, And so I ended up getting the job.

1:00:06.480 --> 1:00:09.160
<v Speaker 3>But the thing is like they didn't offer any like

1:00:09.400 --> 1:00:14.920
<v Speaker 3>relocation assistance, and it would have been like for me,

1:00:14.960 --> 1:00:16.520
<v Speaker 3>it would have been like eight to ten k out

1:00:16.520 --> 1:00:21.840
<v Speaker 3>of my pocket to like go out there car yeah,

1:00:21.360 --> 1:00:24.920
<v Speaker 3>to get in an apartment because like a lot of

1:00:24.920 --> 1:00:27.280
<v Speaker 3>the places I also reached out to were like, yeah,

1:00:27.320 --> 1:00:28.840
<v Speaker 3>if you if you want an apartment, you need a

1:00:30.000 --> 1:00:32.240
<v Speaker 3>you need a pacelet. And I'm like, well, I got

1:00:32.240 --> 1:00:35.040
<v Speaker 3>a job out there. I'm moving out there for a job.

1:00:35.080 --> 1:00:38.160
<v Speaker 3>Can I like, I can show you the official hiring

1:00:38.680 --> 1:00:40.760
<v Speaker 3>email and then I can get it. I can get

1:00:40.760 --> 1:00:43.480
<v Speaker 3>you a FASIP later. And they're like, uh, you know,

1:00:43.600 --> 1:00:45.680
<v Speaker 3>just just reach out to us when you get a pacelip.

1:00:46.000 --> 1:00:48.240
<v Speaker 3>So I was like, okay, well, you know, my mom

1:00:48.360 --> 1:00:49.760
<v Speaker 3>had the idea of like, oh, you know, you usould

1:00:49.760 --> 1:00:52.080
<v Speaker 3>get an hotel for like two weeks, get your pacelip

1:00:52.080 --> 1:00:56.920
<v Speaker 3>and then moved, you know into apartments. Yeah, it's it's

1:00:56.960 --> 1:00:58.800
<v Speaker 3>a good idea. It's also like kind of like a

1:00:58.840 --> 1:01:01.520
<v Speaker 3>gamble too, because you know that Hawai as fucking expensive

1:01:01.560 --> 1:01:05.120
<v Speaker 3>as shit, and if I get like my pace slip,

1:01:05.120 --> 1:01:07.680
<v Speaker 3>there's no guarantee that they're gonna like let me into

1:01:07.680 --> 1:01:13.160
<v Speaker 3>an apartment, you know. So I didn't. I didn't want

1:01:13.160 --> 1:01:16.960
<v Speaker 3>to move out there be like ten k plus in debt,

1:01:17.120 --> 1:01:20.440
<v Speaker 3>and like the job, the job is really cool, but

1:01:21.120 --> 1:01:23.120
<v Speaker 3>it was also only like twenty five an hour, you know.

1:01:23.880 --> 1:01:28.720
<v Speaker 3>So I got into my own head and I like

1:01:29.040 --> 1:01:33.320
<v Speaker 3>end up backing out for the job. And I was

1:01:33.360 --> 1:01:35.760
<v Speaker 3>just like, oh, I just I feel like shit because

1:01:36.120 --> 1:01:38.600
<v Speaker 3>I've been applying to, like I spent all of last

1:01:38.640 --> 1:01:43.520
<v Speaker 3>year applying to like different case manager positions, different different

1:01:43.600 --> 1:01:48.439
<v Speaker 3>like behavioral technician, physicians and whatnot, and like I get

1:01:48.480 --> 1:01:51.200
<v Speaker 3>like a handful of interviews, I'll go through it nothing

1:01:51.720 --> 1:01:54.800
<v Speaker 3>and then I get the one job that's across the

1:01:54.840 --> 1:01:57.800
<v Speaker 3>fucking water. And then I can't go because I don't

1:01:57.800 --> 1:01:59.560
<v Speaker 3>have like enough money saved and I don't want to

1:01:59.680 --> 1:02:02.160
<v Speaker 3>like myself and further dead.

1:02:02.440 --> 1:02:08.720
<v Speaker 2>Wait question, So it's ten K to relocate, uh, because

1:02:08.720 --> 1:02:10.520
<v Speaker 2>you have to like how much of that is shipping

1:02:10.520 --> 1:02:12.400
<v Speaker 2>the car? Like do you need the car there?

1:02:15.000 --> 1:02:17.720
<v Speaker 3>Ideally the well the car is like it was like

1:02:18.400 --> 1:02:22.560
<v Speaker 3>twenty four to twenty four hundred to three k, and

1:02:22.840 --> 1:02:24.560
<v Speaker 3>they measure it also like by weight.

1:02:25.320 --> 1:02:29.320
<v Speaker 2>Okay, so then and this and this job, they're not

1:02:29.320 --> 1:02:32.200
<v Speaker 2>going to give you like a relocation stipends.

1:02:32.600 --> 1:02:36.520
<v Speaker 3>No, like no no airplane comp no, like I would.

1:02:36.560 --> 1:02:38.680
<v Speaker 3>I'll take like section eight out there, you know, like

1:02:38.920 --> 1:02:41.880
<v Speaker 3>throw me you throw me in like a tiny ass

1:02:41.920 --> 1:02:45.440
<v Speaker 3>little apartment, you know, I'll take that. But you know,

1:02:45.920 --> 1:02:50.840
<v Speaker 3>those no, no no assistance whatsoever, which I feel it's

1:02:50.920 --> 1:02:53.240
<v Speaker 3>kind of silly for a government job on an island

1:02:53.440 --> 1:02:59.640
<v Speaker 3>to not have relocation assistance, you know, right, But I

1:02:59.640 --> 1:03:04.560
<v Speaker 3>think it's also just me coping with having terrible financial habits.

1:03:05.640 --> 1:03:08.960
<v Speaker 2>What kind of uh financial habits do you have that

1:03:09.000 --> 1:03:09.600
<v Speaker 2>are terrible?

1:03:11.480 --> 1:03:16.880
<v Speaker 3>I'm just very impulsive and like it's like hard for

1:03:16.960 --> 1:03:20.360
<v Speaker 3>me to say. I think this is another thing too,

1:03:20.440 --> 1:03:22.280
<v Speaker 3>Like when when I was I used to be, I

1:03:22.360 --> 1:03:24.919
<v Speaker 3>used to be egregiously depressed, you know, like I went

1:03:24.960 --> 1:03:29.720
<v Speaker 3>to therapy and I my my therapists diagnosed me with

1:03:29.840 --> 1:03:33.400
<v Speaker 3>a major depressive disordering and they put me on antidepressants

1:03:33.440 --> 1:03:38.120
<v Speaker 3>and whatnot, and so I was just egregiously depressed. I

1:03:38.160 --> 1:03:42.360
<v Speaker 3>had like no dopamine, you know, from my fucking brain

1:03:42.480 --> 1:03:48.040
<v Speaker 3>being silly. I was on the antidepressant, but uh, they

1:03:48.040 --> 1:03:50.240
<v Speaker 3>told me I shouldn't take caffeine, but I used to

1:03:50.320 --> 1:03:53.640
<v Speaker 3>drink like soda like all the fucking time, and and

1:03:53.800 --> 1:03:56.560
<v Speaker 3>uh and coffee and whatnot. So like the anti depressics

1:03:56.600 --> 1:04:00.320
<v Speaker 3>didn't do their full job, you know. So like I

1:04:00.360 --> 1:04:03.720
<v Speaker 3>would just spend money on bullshit to like give myself

1:04:03.760 --> 1:04:07.280
<v Speaker 3>temporary satisfaction, you know, like a like I fucking micro

1:04:07.440 --> 1:04:14.000
<v Speaker 3>transactions and Overwatch or or Magic the Gathering Cards or yeah, yeah,

1:04:14.080 --> 1:04:20.160
<v Speaker 3>totally yeah, but yeah, so I just I just kind

1:04:20.160 --> 1:04:21.720
<v Speaker 3>of put myself in a hole because then for the

1:04:21.760 --> 1:04:24.200
<v Speaker 3>longest time, I had a part time job for a city,

1:04:24.760 --> 1:04:28.320
<v Speaker 3>and like I did like maybe twenty hours of work

1:04:28.360 --> 1:04:31.880
<v Speaker 3>a week, so I get like, you know, a little

1:04:31.880 --> 1:04:36.040
<v Speaker 3>money I had went to bills, and then everything else

1:04:36.160 --> 1:04:37.960
<v Speaker 3>was just shitty spending.

1:04:39.520 --> 1:04:41.760
<v Speaker 2>Wait, sorry, this is a this is a side note.

1:04:41.800 --> 1:04:44.160
<v Speaker 2>But your gym is very far away.

1:04:45.840 --> 1:04:48.600
<v Speaker 3>Oh no, I'm I'm parked in my car like I'm chilling.

1:04:49.040 --> 1:04:51.360
<v Speaker 2>Oh okay, okay, I thought I thought I thought your

1:04:51.400 --> 1:04:54.760
<v Speaker 2>gym was thirty five minutes away from wherever you were.

1:04:56.240 --> 1:04:58.000
<v Speaker 3>Oh no, I'm here. Does this sound better?

1:04:58.360 --> 1:05:03.480
<v Speaker 2>Oh sure, yeah, it does, sounds way better. Okay, yeah, okay,

1:05:04.320 --> 1:05:10.880
<v Speaker 2>So are you still doing Are you still uh like

1:05:11.040 --> 1:05:15.000
<v Speaker 2>addicted to like dopamine loops?

1:05:15.680 --> 1:05:19.040
<v Speaker 3>Yes, but it's I want to say, it's getting better,

1:05:19.240 --> 1:05:22.080
<v Speaker 3>but it's still like a little prevalent, you know.

1:05:22.560 --> 1:05:27.520
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, No, do I have the same fuck? I? I yeah,

1:05:27.680 --> 1:05:32.400
<v Speaker 2>Like no, when you're really fucking depressed, you'll like you're

1:05:32.560 --> 1:05:36.200
<v Speaker 2>just there's something about like, like yesterday I walked by

1:05:36.240 --> 1:05:40.160
<v Speaker 2>like a frozen yogurt store, like I'm truly just abandoned

1:05:40.160 --> 1:05:43.440
<v Speaker 2>frozen yogurt place that nobody ever goes into, and I

1:05:43.480 --> 1:05:45.520
<v Speaker 2>was like stoked. I was like, oh, I get to

1:05:45.520 --> 1:05:48.600
<v Speaker 2>be happy for like five seconds. You know That's what

1:05:48.640 --> 1:05:53.920
<v Speaker 2>it is, right, So I'm like, yeah, brain brain chemistry

1:05:54.680 --> 1:05:58.800
<v Speaker 2>dependent thing. But you feel like but at the beginning

1:05:58.840 --> 1:06:02.040
<v Speaker 2>of this call, you said that you were feeling better

1:06:02.320 --> 1:06:06.120
<v Speaker 2>about all that shit. Do you feel like do you

1:06:06.160 --> 1:06:06.760
<v Speaker 2>feel like you are?

1:06:08.800 --> 1:06:12.720
<v Speaker 3>I feel like overall, I'm like because part of my

1:06:12.840 --> 1:06:15.160
<v Speaker 3>like depression back then was like I just I wanted

1:06:15.200 --> 1:06:17.560
<v Speaker 3>to die, you know, like straight up like or I'm sorry.

1:06:17.560 --> 1:06:19.720
<v Speaker 3>I don't know if I'm able to say that, but

1:06:20.200 --> 1:06:23.520
<v Speaker 3>you know, like it was like the worst of the

1:06:23.560 --> 1:06:25.400
<v Speaker 3>worst of thoughts I used to have, like it would

1:06:25.680 --> 1:06:29.960
<v Speaker 3>fester and snowball, and like I I draw, you know,

1:06:30.000 --> 1:06:32.600
<v Speaker 3>I drive to unsafe places and kind of just like

1:06:32.920 --> 1:06:38.040
<v Speaker 3>watch the waters go, you know. But but uh like

1:06:38.200 --> 1:06:42.400
<v Speaker 3>I don't do that anymore, you know. I overall, I've

1:06:42.520 --> 1:06:47.720
<v Speaker 3>like learned to enjoy life for what it is, and

1:06:48.840 --> 1:06:52.160
<v Speaker 3>I think, like I'm I want to say, I'm like

1:06:52.280 --> 1:06:55.120
<v Speaker 3>seventy five percent happy with my life, and then the

1:06:55.320 --> 1:06:58.000
<v Speaker 3>day of the rest of the percent is like right,

1:06:58.160 --> 1:07:00.600
<v Speaker 3>it's it's it's getting better. The rest of the percentage

1:07:00.600 --> 1:07:03.200
<v Speaker 3>is just like fuck, you know, I really need to

1:07:03.280 --> 1:07:08.560
<v Speaker 3>like I have better money, financial skills and whatnot, and

1:07:08.560 --> 1:07:13.920
<v Speaker 3>and like properly like I want to cut myself off

1:07:13.960 --> 1:07:17.360
<v Speaker 3>of spending on myself, you know, but I also I

1:07:17.360 --> 1:07:21.240
<v Speaker 3>would really like to not be dropping, you know. Hella

1:07:21.360 --> 1:07:25.440
<v Speaker 3>money when I don't need to be mm hmmm mm

1:07:25.520 --> 1:07:32.880
<v Speaker 3>hmm yeah.

1:07:33.560 --> 1:07:37.800
<v Speaker 2>What uh? What was the thing you spent the most

1:07:37.880 --> 1:07:40.600
<v Speaker 2>money on when you were trying to feel something?

1:07:42.080 --> 1:07:42.240
<v Speaker 1>Oh?

1:07:42.280 --> 1:07:44.200
<v Speaker 3>My god, food? I was a fat fuck?

1:07:44.880 --> 1:07:51.040
<v Speaker 2>Oh yeah, dude, dude, listen to this shit. I went

1:07:51.120 --> 1:07:59.840
<v Speaker 2>to Burger King yesterday. I got a whopper, a medium, fries,

1:08:00.800 --> 1:08:03.920
<v Speaker 2>and a drink. Guess how much money that was?

1:08:06.520 --> 1:08:08.240
<v Speaker 3>Did you use the value menu or not?

1:08:08.800 --> 1:08:11.640
<v Speaker 2>No, I use that just regular whopper. Why Wopper's not

1:08:11.640 --> 1:08:12.400
<v Speaker 2>on the menu.

1:08:14.000 --> 1:08:16.760
<v Speaker 3>I'm gonna guess fifteen dollars?

1:08:16.800 --> 1:08:18.360
<v Speaker 2>Seventeen dollars?

1:08:19.040 --> 1:08:19.320
<v Speaker 4>Fuck?

1:08:19.920 --> 1:08:25.679
<v Speaker 2>What happened to our country? Seventeen dollars for a whopper,

1:08:25.960 --> 1:08:26.960
<v Speaker 2>fries and a drink.

1:08:27.840 --> 1:08:30.800
<v Speaker 3>It's agreed, it's it's terrible, and I paid it.

1:08:31.400 --> 1:08:38.040
<v Speaker 2>I'm part of the problem. Oh god. I remember holding

1:08:38.040 --> 1:08:40.920
<v Speaker 2>it and being like and also it was like pathetic

1:08:41.000 --> 1:08:43.360
<v Speaker 2>looking too, It's like it wasn't even like a It's

1:08:43.360 --> 1:08:45.240
<v Speaker 2>not even like a five guys burger where it's like,

1:08:45.280 --> 1:08:52.120
<v Speaker 2>all right, there's some premium missis to this. But what's

1:08:52.120 --> 1:08:52.679
<v Speaker 2>your name again?

1:08:52.720 --> 1:08:52.920
<v Speaker 1>Man?

1:08:54.120 --> 1:08:54.439
<v Speaker 3>Lee?

1:08:55.280 --> 1:09:01.280
<v Speaker 2>Lee? I enjoyed having this conversation with you late.

1:09:02.720 --> 1:09:04.639
<v Speaker 3>I did too. You've given me a lot to think

1:09:04.680 --> 1:09:05.960
<v Speaker 3>about okay.

1:09:05.640 --> 1:09:07.320
<v Speaker 2>Good, good, good?

1:09:08.000 --> 1:09:09.599
<v Speaker 3>What? Uh?

1:09:10.320 --> 1:09:12.519
<v Speaker 2>What should what should we how should we end this?

1:09:12.560 --> 1:09:14.519
<v Speaker 2>What should we say? What should we do? What do

1:09:14.520 --> 1:09:19.479
<v Speaker 2>you think? Uh?

1:09:21.520 --> 1:09:26.320
<v Speaker 3>Am I allowed to plug my my amateur photography account.

1:09:26.800 --> 1:09:29.320
<v Speaker 2>Sure, man, sick?

1:09:30.200 --> 1:09:33.800
<v Speaker 3>Uh what's it called? It's called the Daily Google Photography

1:09:34.040 --> 1:09:38.479
<v Speaker 3>on Instagram, The Daily what Bugle likes you know, like

1:09:38.560 --> 1:09:39.880
<v Speaker 3>Spider Man, The Daily Bugle.

1:09:40.439 --> 1:09:44.000
<v Speaker 2>Uh, it's it's the Daily the Daily Bugle.

1:09:44.640 --> 1:09:47.760
<v Speaker 3>Yes photography.

1:09:48.040 --> 1:09:50.120
<v Speaker 2>So you stole it from Spider Man.

1:09:51.400 --> 1:09:54.400
<v Speaker 3>Hey, the the tag was open on Instagram, so I

1:09:54.439 --> 1:09:58.160
<v Speaker 3>took it. I hope. I don't get like copyright strike through?

1:09:58.400 --> 1:09:59.160
<v Speaker 3>Can I don't even know?

1:09:59.240 --> 1:10:00.840
<v Speaker 2>No, I don't. Yeah, they don't know in the.

1:10:02.479 --> 1:10:02.760
<v Speaker 3>That way.

1:10:02.800 --> 1:10:06.600
<v Speaker 2>It's just the Daily Bugle Photography.

1:10:06.720 --> 1:10:06.920
<v Speaker 3>Yep.

1:10:07.640 --> 1:10:14.000
<v Speaker 2>And there's no there's no Oh are you Spider Man?

1:10:15.600 --> 1:10:16.519
<v Speaker 3>Yeah? That's me?

1:10:16.960 --> 1:10:19.360
<v Speaker 2>Okay, cool, all right? So well, you got a picture

1:10:19.360 --> 1:10:21.360
<v Speaker 2>of a cat? Wait, this is nice. Wait, this is

1:10:21.400 --> 1:10:23.720
<v Speaker 2>a great photography page. I like this. I'm following. I

1:10:23.800 --> 1:10:27.080
<v Speaker 2>just followed. You got a picture this, You got a

1:10:27.080 --> 1:10:30.400
<v Speaker 2>picture of the sun. You get a picture of a flower,

1:10:32.160 --> 1:10:36.960
<v Speaker 2>you got a picture of a fucking bird the sky. Wait,

1:10:37.120 --> 1:10:41.400
<v Speaker 2>everyone followed this guy's photography page the Daily Bugle Photography. Wait,

1:10:41.439 --> 1:10:44.000
<v Speaker 2>look at this one. Paradise Falls.

1:10:45.760 --> 1:10:46.679
<v Speaker 3>Oh that's a good trail.

1:10:46.840 --> 1:10:50.920
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, scri scroll through your whole page. This is nice.

1:10:51.000 --> 1:10:55.040
<v Speaker 2>This is a this is like, this is this page

1:10:55.160 --> 1:11:01.080
<v Speaker 2>kind of looks like, uh, if this should be on

1:11:01.160 --> 1:11:07.200
<v Speaker 2>the Golden Record that we send out into outer space

1:11:07.280 --> 1:11:10.080
<v Speaker 2>for the aliens. You know, it's just kind of it's

1:11:10.080 --> 1:11:12.000
<v Speaker 2>pretty perfect.

1:11:13.120 --> 1:11:15.759
<v Speaker 3>That's the that's a Heidi, my mighty, that's a mighty

1:11:15.880 --> 1:11:16.639
<v Speaker 3>high compliment.

1:11:17.000 --> 1:11:19.160
<v Speaker 2>I mean that with I really, I mean that with

1:11:19.280 --> 1:11:21.040
<v Speaker 2>all of my like, I'm so serious right now, Like

1:11:21.080 --> 1:11:24.960
<v Speaker 2>it's this is just this is just a guy taken

1:11:25.080 --> 1:11:28.960
<v Speaker 2>photos of the Earth that he landed on. This is

1:11:29.000 --> 1:11:33.080
<v Speaker 2>exactly this. You're this I don't know. I'm this is

1:11:33.120 --> 1:11:35.559
<v Speaker 2>what it feels like to be alive. This is is

1:11:35.920 --> 1:11:39.640
<v Speaker 2>looking through I'm looking through your page. I'm like, this

1:11:39.800 --> 1:11:48.120
<v Speaker 2>is it feels like I found something. Any flower is

1:11:48.120 --> 1:11:52.840
<v Speaker 2>a it's a sunset, a flower, a cat. This is

1:11:52.960 --> 1:11:56.479
<v Speaker 2>very pure, you know. There's no nothing flashy, nothing crazy.

1:11:56.960 --> 1:11:59.000
<v Speaker 2>And even the look at the look at the fucking

1:11:59.400 --> 1:12:03.400
<v Speaker 2>caption to what's up y'all. This is my average photography

1:12:03.439 --> 1:12:07.000
<v Speaker 2>page that I will try to post consistently on let

1:12:07.000 --> 1:12:10.320
<v Speaker 2>me know what you like and don't like about my posts.

1:12:10.880 --> 1:12:13.760
<v Speaker 2>I let your open the criticism. But you're also you

1:12:13.800 --> 1:12:18.160
<v Speaker 2>know this is a this is a good is that

1:12:18.240 --> 1:12:21.640
<v Speaker 2>you know it's a spider man in the This is

1:12:21.640 --> 1:12:23.719
<v Speaker 2>a great page. I'm a huge fan. I'm gonna comment

1:12:25.360 --> 1:12:32.240
<v Speaker 2>nice on this picture of the sunset. Wow, it's a

1:12:32.280 --> 1:12:35.040
<v Speaker 2>picture of the sunset. It says summer is almost upon us.

1:12:35.200 --> 1:12:37.080
<v Speaker 2>Hashtag summer, hashtag beach.

1:12:39.800 --> 1:12:42.040
<v Speaker 3>Yeah. I had to do the hashtags to try and

1:12:42.080 --> 1:12:46.360
<v Speaker 3>get like something some more like for spread, you know

1:12:46.640 --> 1:12:48.280
<v Speaker 3>whatever media stuff.

1:12:49.120 --> 1:12:52.640
<v Speaker 2>This is perfect. But everyone, thank you. Check out this

1:12:52.680 --> 1:12:55.120
<v Speaker 2>guy's photography page. What's your name again?

1:12:56.200 --> 1:12:58.639
<v Speaker 3>I'm Lee, Lee Lee.

1:12:58.680 --> 1:13:00.360
<v Speaker 2>Is there anything you want to say to the people

1:13:00.360 --> 1:13:01.400
<v Speaker 2>of the computer before we go?

1:13:01.960 --> 1:13:05.840
<v Speaker 3>Uh, go to therapy? Getto live shows. I went to

1:13:05.880 --> 1:13:07.120
<v Speaker 3>your first one in La.

1:13:07.400 --> 1:13:10.800
<v Speaker 2>Oh shit, yeah, what year? What year?

1:13:13.360 --> 1:13:19.000
<v Speaker 3>Let me I let me see if I can find

1:13:19.000 --> 1:13:24.759
<v Speaker 3>the pick the selfie real quick twenty twenty two, May second,

1:13:24.760 --> 1:13:25.599
<v Speaker 3>twenty twenty two.

1:13:26.479 --> 1:13:28.280
<v Speaker 2>Oh shit, okay everything was my first live show. You

1:13:28.360 --> 1:13:29.040
<v Speaker 2>have the lodge room?

1:13:29.080 --> 1:13:29.280
<v Speaker 1>Fuck?

1:13:29.360 --> 1:13:31.400
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, damn hell yeah. Nice to finally talk to you.

1:13:33.120 --> 1:13:35.600
<v Speaker 3>Yes, I have a selfie with you. I was a

1:13:35.640 --> 1:13:36.599
<v Speaker 3>little drunk that night.

1:13:36.760 --> 1:13:44.160
<v Speaker 2>Funny enough, Lee, thank you very much for calling, and uh,

1:13:44.479 --> 1:13:46.080
<v Speaker 2>good luck with the rest of your entire life. This

1:13:46.200 --> 1:13:47.080
<v Speaker 2>was a nice conversation.

1:13:48.360 --> 1:13:49.920
<v Speaker 1>Thank I really appreciate that.

1:13:50.080 --> 1:13:52.320
<v Speaker 3>You know. I'm gonna I'm gonna do better to be

1:13:52.400 --> 1:13:56.640
<v Speaker 3>more u instinctual like you liked. I liked what you

1:13:56.640 --> 1:14:00.400
<v Speaker 3>said earlier about the whole listening to your guys and

1:14:00.479 --> 1:14:02.320
<v Speaker 3>doing doing what you want to do and not want

1:14:02.320 --> 1:14:03.160
<v Speaker 3>to do.

1:14:03.240 --> 1:14:05.519
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, all right, I'll try to do that too, because

1:14:05.520 --> 1:14:08.000
<v Speaker 2>everything I just told you about this, it's just it's

1:14:08.040 --> 1:14:11.559
<v Speaker 2>just it's just it's just behavioral theory. For me, I've

1:14:11.560 --> 1:14:15.639
<v Speaker 2>been I've been ignoring my gut a lot. But yeah,

1:14:15.680 --> 1:14:16.920
<v Speaker 2>I'm gonna try to do that too. All right, we'll

1:14:16.920 --> 1:14:19.560
<v Speaker 2>both we'll make a pact. We'll both try to be

1:14:20.800 --> 1:14:27.400
<v Speaker 2>better about stuff. Oh, I'll glad we make that pack swag.

1:14:27.600 --> 1:14:28.759
<v Speaker 2>I'll see you around the universally.

1:14:29.280 --> 1:14:29.640
<v Speaker 3>Thank you.

1:14:29.840 --> 1:14:32.760
<v Speaker 2>I love you, Love you too, buddy, see you late.

1:14:33.000 --> 1:14:36.639
<v Speaker 2>Bye bye dude. Once again, please go follow the Daily

1:14:36.760 --> 1:14:41.000
<v Speaker 2>Bugle Photography on Instagram. Look, he just took a picture

1:14:41.040 --> 1:14:44.000
<v Speaker 2>of a peloton. Why am I obsessed with? I don't

1:14:44.000 --> 1:14:47.040
<v Speaker 2>know if this is the the Celsius talking about I'm

1:14:47.080 --> 1:14:49.280
<v Speaker 2>obsessed with this since he took a picture of a tree,

1:14:51.320 --> 1:14:54.800
<v Speaker 2>this is a perfect Instagram page. Please go look at this.

1:15:00.120 --> 1:15:03.160
<v Speaker 3>Everything get goes to and his rite's teaching you about

1:15:03.680 --> 1:15:06.800
<v Speaker 3>your life, but he's not really an expert.