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Speaker 1: Wind Down with Janet Kranler and Michael Coughlin and I'm

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Speaker 1: her radio podcast.

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Speaker 2: How does it feel to be with a cougar?

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Speaker 3: Wow? I love it. And now this is where you

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Speaker 3: say I'm four years older than you.

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Speaker 2: I am. I'm thirty seven years old, which means I'm four.

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Speaker 2: I'm technically now a cougar.

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Speaker 3: Is that the cutoff age?

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Speaker 2: I mean, I think, honestly, cougar is like ten years older.

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Speaker 2: But I like to think of myself as a cougar.

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Speaker 2: But thirty seven just sounds so old, Like I remember

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Speaker 2: going to my mom's like surprise thirtieth birthday as a

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Speaker 2: little girl, and I'm like thirty seven. Woolf. Oh it's funny.

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Speaker 2: I was reading my DMS too, and someone was like,

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Speaker 2: there you go. I thought Michael was an ex professional

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Speaker 2: hockey player until I saw the video of the All

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Speaker 2: pline hockey and then it confirmed that, Oh no, it

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Speaker 2: was football.

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Speaker 3: Clearly was a nice that was so much fun.

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Speaker 2: Michael did a great birthday for me, went ice skating.

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Speaker 2: He runted out this like it's like a half rink

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Speaker 2: in a in a sense. Yeah, it's like a hockeys

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Speaker 2: hockey school camp. But they also runt out the ice,

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Speaker 2: and so we played hockey, yeah.

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Speaker 3: Running for two hours. Yeah, it's like a it's called

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Speaker 3: the Hockey Lab in Franklin, and it was awesome. So

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Speaker 3: we had him set up the hockey nets and we

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Speaker 3: had a bunch of pucks out there and Jan and

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Speaker 3: I were doing passengers and playing one on one and

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Speaker 3: then we had Jolly join us for the last hour,

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Speaker 3: which was awesome.

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Speaker 2: Which, by the way, I got a little hate because

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Speaker 2: Jolie wasn't wearing a helmet. Is she supposed to wear

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Speaker 2: a helmet like I was. I didn't wear helmet when

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Speaker 2: I started. I learned how to skate when I was five,

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Speaker 2: same age as almost Jolly, and I didn't wear a helmet.

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Speaker 2: But then again, did I even have a car seat

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Speaker 2: when I was fine?

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Speaker 3: Right, exactly whatever people are going to say, whatever they

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Speaker 3: want to say. She was fine.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, she's a good skater.

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Speaker 3: Yeah.

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Speaker 2: If I mean Jace, I would for sure put a

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Speaker 2: helmet because he doesn't know how to say right.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, he falls over every two seconds. But no, I

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Speaker 3: mean whatever, we were there, she was fine. If it

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Speaker 3: was like a group setting, there's more people to like

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Speaker 3: run into her, but she was We saw her fall

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Speaker 3: the first couple of times, and she was in control

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Speaker 3: of her falls.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, she knew to fall on her butt, right, It's not.

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Speaker 3: Like she was Yeah, she knew how to fall. Wasn't

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Speaker 3: like she was just feet out from under straight unto

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Speaker 3: her back, her head.

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Speaker 2: I just don't know though, if I would have the

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Speaker 2: like if I was a person. I mean I am

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Speaker 2: a person, but like I don't know if I would

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Speaker 2: look at someone saying and be like, oh, your kid

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Speaker 2: should be wearing a helmet. But then again, I feel

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Speaker 2: like I did it that one time when we went

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Speaker 2: and saw Jurassic Park, there was a three year old

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Speaker 2: watching the movie and she was like scared, and I'm like,

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Speaker 2: what mother would bring a child here?

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Speaker 3: We were watching Sons of Anarchy the other day and

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Speaker 3: you're and they showed Jack's crib. She's like, there are

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Speaker 3: so many things wrong with that crib.

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Speaker 2: There actually was they not accurate? It was a baby

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Speaker 2: and it was able to roll over, and it had blankets,

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Speaker 2: and like, I'm like, Sid's people right exactly. And then

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Speaker 2: now that the baby's older, the crib needs to be lowered.

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Speaker 2: Like whoever was the script person on Sons of Anarchy?

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Speaker 2: Which by the way, you know, amazing show, our favorite show.

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Speaker 2: But uh, there's gotta be careful. So yeah, I guess

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Speaker 2: I am kind of like that person. I just don't

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Speaker 2: tell the person even better, even.

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Speaker 3: Better, speaking of no, that's stupid.

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Speaker 2: What Monopoly kills all marriages?

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Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, that was a great way to end the night,

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Speaker 3: playing Monopoly against each other with your spouse.

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Speaker 2: So fun, which, by the way, we're going to finish.

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Speaker 2: We haven't finished it yet, but we go. And here's

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Speaker 2: the thing, you just landed on board walk.

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Speaker 3: Playing with two people is damn near impossible because you

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Speaker 3: need a third party to kind of be Switzerland when

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Speaker 3: it comes to trading trading properties.

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Speaker 2: I played it. I think I played it really smart.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, I FD myself just to move along the game.

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Speaker 2: No you didn't. I got those three properties the Purple

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Speaker 2: put houses on it before you even had like a

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Speaker 2: three because you were passing up those don't pass up

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Speaker 2: the cheap opportunities, that's all I'm saying.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, you're a house poor no anymore anyway, So we

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Speaker 3: but we made it out without fighting, shocking, which is successful. Yeah,

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Speaker 3: only because he's your birthday. I think any other day

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Speaker 3: I go like this is speaking of other relationships. Oh oh,

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Speaker 3: so current events going on right now?

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Speaker 2: Oh are you bringing in the didn't didn't? Didn't didn't.

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Speaker 2: This is Michael Cosson with Pop Current Events.

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Speaker 3: Yeah TMZ. NBA star Malik Beasley's wife Montana Yao reacts

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Speaker 3: to photos of him and Larsa Pippen holding hands.

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Speaker 2: I'm sorry he has a wife.

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Speaker 3: Yes, and he's blatantly holding hands with another woman in

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Speaker 3: this picture at the airport.

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Speaker 2: Oh and she okay, I'm ready this and then the

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Speaker 2: wife comments, wow, I don't even know this man. The

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Speaker 2: model twenty three wrote on her Instagram stories, this is wild, y'all.

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Speaker 2: I'm seeing it for the first time. Like y'all, yeah,

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Speaker 2: you know what I I had. I was just reading

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Speaker 2: this thing on us weekly because on Instagram and the

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Speaker 2: Pip and Girl. Okay, I know, I know the story.

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Speaker 2: The Pip and Girl just wrote back and said something

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Speaker 2: about salt, like don't believe everything you read on social media,

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Speaker 2: like basically calling out the wife like she knew this

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Speaker 2: was going on.

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Speaker 4: Uh.

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Speaker 2: But that's how That's what I got from the message.

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Speaker 2: Because if you're like, that's ballsy holding hands in like

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Speaker 2: a mall, it's one thing to be coming out like

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Speaker 2: a I mean it's not okay, not okay at all,

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Speaker 2: but coming out of a bar drunk like he's very

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Speaker 2: aware that moment they look like they're at a mall

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Speaker 2: holding hands.

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Speaker 1: Or the airport.

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Speaker 3: Yet we're not just that that. You gotta be really

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Speaker 3: stupid to beat to do that. Yeah, so maybe there

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Speaker 3: is something behind the scenes that his wife is like

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Speaker 3: plain innocent.

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Speaker 2: I don't know, But didn't you say something about that

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Speaker 2: girl though? Because I don't know who that girl? I

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Speaker 2: don't know who any of these people are.

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Speaker 3: Larsa Pippen is Scottie's Pippin's ex wife.

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Speaker 2: Who's Scottie Pippen, Hall.

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Speaker 3: Of Fame basketball player for the Bulls, Oh, Jordan and Pippen.

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Speaker 2: I mean, the name sounds familiar, but I'm like, and

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Speaker 2: then who's the guy she's holding hands with? Now?

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Speaker 3: He's a basketball player.

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Speaker 1: I don't know.

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Speaker 2: Oh, so she's like a basketball Yeah.

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Speaker 3: But I just I feel like I've heard her name,

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Speaker 3: like another headlines similar to this or something.

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Speaker 2: So she's a homewrecker.

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Speaker 3: I'm not saying that, but I'm just saying I feel

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Speaker 3: like I've heard her name.

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Speaker 2: It's a song by Miranda home record. That's not that's

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Speaker 2: Oh no, what's not? Miranda Limbert was her name. Don't

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Speaker 2: know what you know what you're doing. I think you're

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Speaker 2: going to Brulin what you got Easter? But you're not. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: you're just a home record. Come on, that's a good

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Speaker 2: country song. Who sings that? Easton? You're my country?

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Speaker 4: Did?

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Speaker 5: Yes?

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Speaker 2: S Gretchen Wilson. Thank you? It's a good song. And

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Speaker 2: then did you see the other stuff? Sorry? I just

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Speaker 2: want to since I'm talking on country right now, because

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Speaker 2: she kind of had she dabbled in country.

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Speaker 3: Oh yeah, let's talk about that. But first we have

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Speaker 3: our amazing guest, Rachel Rogers, who is the CEO of

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Speaker 3: Hello seven, which her whole mission is all about, you know,

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Speaker 3: impowering women to become millionaires essentially.

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Speaker 2: I cannot wait to talk.

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Speaker 3: I know. She's got an amazing website, a lot of

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Speaker 3: cool stuff, very successful lawyer and entrepreneurs. So let's take

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Speaker 3: a break and then have Rachel.

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Speaker 2: Hey, Rachel, how you doing? How good? How are you guys?

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Speaker 6: Good?

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Speaker 3: Thanks for coming on the show with us.

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Speaker 2: Where do you live?

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Speaker 1: I live in North Carolina, Greensboro.

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Speaker 2: I was just gonna say wherever you're at right now

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Speaker 2: looks really pretty and just like it.

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Speaker 1: Is really pretty. I just want a fifty three acre

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Speaker 1: ranch in the middle of a pandemic.

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Speaker 2: Yes you did, Oh my gosh, fifty three acres. Do

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Speaker 2: you have horses?

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Speaker 1: And yes, we have a beautiful horse barn. We don't

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Speaker 1: have horses yet. We're actually in the process of acquiring

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Speaker 1: our first horses. So all I do every day is

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Speaker 1: research horses.

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Speaker 2: Sorry this is so random, but horses, like they really

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Speaker 2: they like they know what's going on in you.

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Speaker 1: They're very smart, and I feel like they're therapeutic to

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Speaker 1: be around, you know, and right now, like it's one

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Speaker 1: of the few things that I can get my kids,

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Speaker 1: like my kids can do and like be outside, you know.

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Speaker 2: So how many kids.

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Speaker 5: Do you have?

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Speaker 1: I have four?

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Speaker 2: What are their ages?

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Speaker 1: So my three little ones are nine, seven, and two,

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Speaker 1: and then I have a twenty year old stepdaughter.

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Speaker 2: Wow, bite the range? How is? How is having four kids?

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Speaker 1: It's a lot? But I have to say, like, going

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Speaker 1: from as you guys already know, right, going from one

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Speaker 1: to two is like you feel like a train hit

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Speaker 1: you, you know, because you're like, holy crap, Like I was

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Speaker 1: up all night with one and now this one's hungry,

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Speaker 1: like I don't got time for that. I want to sleep.

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Speaker 1: So but then you know, once you start adding after that,

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Speaker 1: it's like whatever, you could add three more and it

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Speaker 1: won't matter.

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Speaker 2: Good to know.

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Speaker 3: I like it because we're we're considering a third right now.

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Speaker 3: We're going to go talk to a doctor here soon.

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Speaker 3: Ganas like, well, if we have three.

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Speaker 4: Four, I'm like, I'm kind of with you, to be honest, Like,

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Speaker 4: my husband got the snipsies after our last one, and

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Speaker 4: we've both had the thought like, huh, I would totally

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Speaker 4: consider having another one, especially now that we have this

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Speaker 4: big ass property.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, you're like, we need a football field of like

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Speaker 2: a team now, like you need help with the chores,

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Speaker 2: like who's gonna hey all the barrel up, all the

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Speaker 2: hayze or whatever exactly.

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Speaker 1: I mean, this is my husband's fourth, so he was

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Speaker 1: kind of like, I'm done, you.

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Speaker 2: Know, so how do you Because your whole thing is

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Speaker 2: like we can all be a millionaire, right, yes, so

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Speaker 2: how do we do that? Because I would like to

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Speaker 2: be so that would be great. What's what's the first

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Speaker 2: step in going down that road?

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Speaker 1: Yes, well, I think the first step is stop making

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Speaker 1: brokeass decisions and start making million dollar decisions.

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Speaker 2: Oh, like, what give me an awesome example.

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Speaker 1: So brokeass decisions are the ones where you know they're constricting, right,

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Speaker 1: Like they steal your time and energy, they deplete mental space,

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Speaker 1: they kind of get you busy with pitoli, you know,

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Speaker 1: and sometimes they seem like million dollar decisions like oh, oh,

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Speaker 1: let's put all this effort into saving some money, right, Like,

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Speaker 1: let's not hire help around the house. Let's all do

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Speaker 1: it all ourselves. We can save money. But it's like,

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Speaker 1: do you but is that going to help you make money?

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Speaker 1: Like cleaning up after your kids all day or not

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Speaker 1: having like like we have a chef, right, and it

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Speaker 1: was like the best thing I've ever spent money on

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Speaker 1: in my life was like finding this chef and hiring

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Speaker 1: them because that's what took up all my time, is

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Speaker 1: like cooking and fighting with my husband and you know,

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Speaker 1: like passive aggressively, like banging pots around the kitchen while

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Speaker 1: I'm cooking because I'm pissed that I have to do

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Speaker 1: this after a long work day. Anybody ever been there,

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Speaker 1: so you know, so it could be like, well, let

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Speaker 1: us save money and we'll do all that stuff ourselves

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Speaker 1: and I think that's a brokeass decision because if you

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Speaker 1: have the ability to make money doing right like posting

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Speaker 1: a podcast or teaching a class or doing workshops or

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Speaker 1: events or any starting businesses right, then free up your time,

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Speaker 1: hire someone to help you up your time. Spend a

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Speaker 1: little money up front, because the payoff is huge. You

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Speaker 1: freed up a bunch of your time that you can

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Speaker 1: now spend making money right. And so that would be

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Speaker 1: a million dollar decision, like hiring a chef was a

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Speaker 1: million dollar decision that we made, you know. And so

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Speaker 1: I think especially women are always making decisions. And this

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Speaker 1: is the money messages that are sent to us is

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Speaker 1: like contract right, like ooh, stop shopping, you know, stop

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Speaker 1: buying that latte, right, Like it's always about like it

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Speaker 1: sends the message that women are shopaholics, that we can't

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Speaker 1: control ourselves with money, that we need to cut coupons

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Speaker 1: and do more with less. And men get the messages

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Speaker 1: of like, you know, be a power investor, right, like

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Speaker 1: you know, step into your prowess. Like there's always like

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Speaker 1: an image of a lion or something. Right. For men,

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Speaker 1: it's like go out there, take risks, make it happen.

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Speaker 1: And the reality is is that you can cut coupons

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Speaker 1: all day long, You're not going to save so much

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Speaker 1: money that it actually puts you in a different tax bracket,

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Speaker 1: right like it you can't save your way to being

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Speaker 1: a millionaire, right Like, Really, what we need to be

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Speaker 1: talking to people about is earning more and what are

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Speaker 1: the ways that we can do that. How can we

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Speaker 1: spend more of our time earning more and really step

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Speaker 1: into our talents and skills, capitalize on that scale, on

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Speaker 1: what we're good at, and that's what's actually gonna help

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Speaker 1: us become millionaires.

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Speaker 2: You know that makes sense?

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Speaker 3: You know when I was looking at your stuff, Rachel,

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Speaker 3: and I'm gonna read your mission shape, your mission statement,

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Speaker 3: because mission statement, your mission statement for everyone to hear.

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Speaker 3: Because as soon as I read it, I thought of

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Speaker 3: Janna Okay in this way, and I don't think she's

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Speaker 3: read it yet, but here it is for our listeners.

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Speaker 3: Rachel's mission is to help women hit seven figures without

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Speaker 3: sacrificing their families. Insanity. I'm an entrepreneur and I'm a mother.

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Speaker 3: I run a seventh figure business, and I'm in the

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Speaker 3: front row of every dancer title. I'm picking my kids

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Speaker 3: up from school every day. I'm watching Peppa Pit cartoons

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Speaker 3: in bed on Sunday mornings. If you've ever seen me

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Speaker 3: speak at an event, chances are my three children. We're

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Speaker 3: in the front row. When people tell me you have

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Speaker 3: to choose which family and business? I say both. Hell yeah,

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Speaker 3: that is our kind of girl right there. Yeah, because

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Speaker 3: it makes me think of Janna, because that's you know,

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Speaker 3: Janna has that mindset. I'm trying to keep up with

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Speaker 3: her and so to to listen and experience women like

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Speaker 3: you'allselves and to be successful in business. I love the

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Speaker 3: fact that it's almost like having your cake and eat

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Speaker 3: it too, right, You're not You don't have to choose

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Speaker 3: that house life to be around the kids and then

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Speaker 3: sacrifice work. So, you know, my thing is when people,

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Speaker 3: when women out there are anybody who may be the

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Speaker 3: one the primary caregiver for the kids, what's that first

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Speaker 3: step for them to be like? Look, by doing this,

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Speaker 3: you can actually spend more time with them. By doing this,

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Speaker 3: you can set yourself up better. How do you get

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Speaker 3: someone encourage a woman or anybody to take that leap?

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Speaker 1: Yes, well, I think to start, we have to kind

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Speaker 1: of change our philosophy around parenting and especially motherhood because

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Speaker 1: again right, like, so we can't win as women, right

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Speaker 1: because not only do we have to be like super

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Speaker 1: hot and sexy, but we also need to do all

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Speaker 1: the things for our children, right and like we're not

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Speaker 1: good mothers if we don't, and also do more with

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Speaker 1: cut coupons while we're at it, right, and so like

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Speaker 1: that's these ideas about what womanhood is and what motherhood is.

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Speaker 1: I think we need to start challenging them. So for example,

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Speaker 1: you know, I don't do my children's laundry. I don't

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Speaker 1: cook for them ever, Like I never make them a mail.

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Speaker 1: Maybe on a Sunday I will heat up some soup,

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Speaker 1: but like, other than that, I'm not cooking a lot

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Speaker 1: of the sort of like labor related to parenting I'm

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Speaker 1: not doing. However, I do read to them every day.

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Speaker 1: I spend quality time with them. I'm making decisions about

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Speaker 1: their education and their homeschooling now so like their homeschooling

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Speaker 1: plan right, and creating opportunity for them of of course

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Speaker 1: very involved in like their health and well being and

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Speaker 1: what they eat. I'm making those parental decisions. But I

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Speaker 1: don't have to do all of the labor to be

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Speaker 1: a good parent, you know, and in fact, by eliminating

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Speaker 1: a lot of that labor, I'm actually able to spend

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Speaker 1: quality time with them where I'm done with work and

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Speaker 1: I don't have to go cook or clean or do

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Speaker 1: that stuff. I get to just immediately sit down with

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Speaker 1: them and like play a game, read books, watch a

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Speaker 1: show together, you know. And I think that's how you

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Speaker 1: do that is that's like, you know, people ask me

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Speaker 1: all the time, like how do you do it all?

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Speaker 1: I'm like, I don't. I hire other people and they

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Speaker 1: help me.

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Speaker 3: You're a hell of a delegator.

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Speaker 1: Exactly, master delegator. And that's really what we all need

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Speaker 1: to be thinking about, especially as women, right, Like if

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Speaker 1: we have careers and I and I explained to my

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Speaker 1: daughter because sometimes she's you know, she'll come to like

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Speaker 1: my office door and say, you know, like I want

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Speaker 1: you to hang out with me, like why are you

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Speaker 1: still working or whatever? And I'm like, you know, other

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Speaker 1: moms have to like commute to and from work, right,

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Speaker 1: I get to be here all day with you. I

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Speaker 1: get to eat lunch with you and breakfast with you

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Speaker 1: every day. We have so much quality time together and

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Speaker 1: like you got to contribute, right, We have a nice house,

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Speaker 1: We have a nice life, and your contribution is let

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Speaker 1: me finish working and you go clean your room or

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Speaker 1: you go occupy yourself until I'm done, and then we're

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Speaker 1: gonna have quality time together. So I want my children

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Speaker 1: to know that, like, yes, this nice life that we're

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Speaker 1: all creating, you're a part of that, and you need

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Speaker 1: to contribute to that too. Like sometimes it's putting the

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Speaker 1: you know, setting the table for dinner, and sometimes it's

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Speaker 1: leaving mommy alone so she can finish working so she

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Speaker 1: can make the money that creates this life.

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Speaker 2: You know, what about for the women that are stuck

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Speaker 2: in that situation where they feel like they can't have

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Speaker 2: other people do it because it might not be to

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Speaker 2: the standards they want it done at. You know, like

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Speaker 2: for example, I don't like how Mike folds the laundry,

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Speaker 2: so I'm like, I then feel like I have to

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Speaker 2: do it, and so or and and you know, and

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Speaker 2: there're gonna be other situations too. But it's like, how

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Speaker 2: do you when when you want to release those things

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Speaker 2: but you're too afraid of releasing the control of those things.

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Speaker 1: Yes, well this is this is the step, right, Like

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Speaker 1: releasing the control creates freedom and I get this all

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Speaker 1: the time because one of the first things what I

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Speaker 1: tell people to start with cause you know, like I

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Speaker 1: didn't start with outsourcing having a chef, right, Like, I

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Speaker 1: was broke as a joke when I started my business,

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Speaker 1: you know, So what I started with was laundry. I

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Speaker 1: started outsourcing laundry and it was like, you know, fifty

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Speaker 1: bucks right to like have somebody else do that week's laundry.

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Speaker 1: And that saved me like a whole weekend of like

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Speaker 1: doing laundry. And so, you know, if they didn't fold

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Speaker 1: it the way I wanted, then I would tell them

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Speaker 1: how I wanted it folded. And then if they didn't,

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Speaker 1: you know, like they use like this regular detergent and

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Speaker 1: I'm like, no, no, no, I want the like organic, environmentally

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Speaker 1: friendly like stuff, you know, So I would give them that.

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Speaker 1: And here's what that does, right, It turns us into

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Speaker 1: leaders when we have to delegate to other people, tell

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Speaker 1: them exactly how we want things done, tell them when

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Speaker 1: they do it wrong, learn how to communicate with them,

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Speaker 1: you know what I mean. That's what leadership is. And

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Speaker 1: I think the sooner that people outsource hire a personal

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Speaker 1: assistant send out their laundry start like just how having

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Speaker 1: small tasks that take up their time outsource they're going

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Speaker 1: to step into leadership because they're gonna learn how to

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Speaker 1: lead other people. You know. That means you do have

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Speaker 1: to kind of let go of like, Okay, maybe it's

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Speaker 1: not perfect every time, but you want them to get

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Speaker 1: it like eighty percent of the way that you want

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Speaker 1: it like eighty percent right, and accept that as like

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Speaker 1: that's good enough so that you can be free to

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Speaker 1: be out here being a millionaire.

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Speaker 2: Sure, no, I get that. I think the hard thing

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Speaker 2: just personally is just like asking for help, you know,

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Speaker 2: because I feel like I can do it all, even

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Speaker 2: though there are days where it's just like I'm just

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Speaker 2: tired and maybe I'm not the best mom because I'm

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Speaker 2: so exhausted by all those things, which then affects, like

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Speaker 2: you said, like you're able to do all these things

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Speaker 2: and then be like really present with your kids and

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Speaker 2: it's like after I'm busy and doing stuff and you know,

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Speaker 2: and then it's like, oh okay, it's almost like, oh gosh,

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Speaker 2: now I have not that like I have to go

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Speaker 2: hang out with them, but I want to. I'm just

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Speaker 2: exhausted by the time that I get to that time

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Speaker 2: to be with them.

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Speaker 1: Exactly, and like a special in the age of COVID nineteen, right,

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Speaker 1: Like that's happening for so many women where we're exhausted,

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Speaker 1: and like America is relying on women to home, educate

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Speaker 1: these children, maintain the household, still make money by showing

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Speaker 1: up to work on zoom, Like it is really challenging.

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Speaker 1: And there are stats showing that, like hundreds of thousands

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Speaker 1: of women are leaving their careers because they just it's

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Speaker 1: too much and it's exhausting for them, you know, and

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Speaker 1: it's just not good for your mental health. So I

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Speaker 1: think that that's how you start to get back to

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Speaker 1: that place of sanity, Like we have to reject the

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Speaker 1: idea that we need to do at all, you know,

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Speaker 1: and that's the only way to.

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Speaker 2: Get back to that. What can a man, husband or

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Speaker 2: partner do to lift their wives or partners up to

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Speaker 2: encourage them to get to that you know, seven seven

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Speaker 2: figure happy life.

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Speaker 1: Yes, well, I think one of the first of all,

436
00:20:58,080 --> 00:21:01,720
Speaker 1: I mean, there's lots of stats that show that even

437
00:21:01,800 --> 00:21:04,800
Speaker 1: when the woman is the breadwinner, that men still don't

438
00:21:04,840 --> 00:21:07,639
Speaker 1: do as much domestic work as women do, you know.

439
00:21:07,720 --> 00:21:10,080
Speaker 1: And I'm not sure, that's not true for every household,

440
00:21:10,119 --> 00:21:12,840
Speaker 1: but it's true for a lot of them. We just naturally,

441
00:21:12,920 --> 00:21:14,960
Speaker 1: like you said, like I can do it all, so

442
00:21:15,080 --> 00:21:18,480
Speaker 1: I am right, and so we just have that natural

443
00:21:18,480 --> 00:21:20,840
Speaker 1: inclination to do it and we're not gonna wait. We're

444
00:21:20,840 --> 00:21:22,439
Speaker 1: just gonna get it done. We're not gonna argue with

445
00:21:22,440 --> 00:21:23,800
Speaker 1: our husbands every day. Right.

446
00:21:23,920 --> 00:21:26,000
Speaker 2: It's kind of like when Mike, when when we talk

447
00:21:26,080 --> 00:21:27,879
Speaker 2: about the laundry, He's like, I put it in, and

448
00:21:27,920 --> 00:21:31,000
Speaker 2: I'm like, and by the time I go to forward it,

449
00:21:31,000 --> 00:21:34,080
Speaker 2: it's already forwarded, folded and put away. And I'm like, yeah,

450
00:21:34,080 --> 00:21:37,200
Speaker 2: because like we have you know, are just our times, right, yes,

451
00:21:37,359 --> 00:21:40,040
Speaker 2: So it's like the man tries, but it's just the

452
00:21:40,080 --> 00:21:42,879
Speaker 2: woman's already like is there before you know?

453
00:21:43,160 --> 00:21:43,360
Speaker 4: Yeah.

454
00:21:43,359 --> 00:21:45,840
Speaker 1: So it's exactly what you were saying with like asking

455
00:21:45,880 --> 00:21:49,000
Speaker 1: for help, right and saying like, Hey, I have this

456
00:21:49,080 --> 00:21:51,680
Speaker 1: big vision, I have this dream, I have this thing

457
00:21:51,680 --> 00:21:53,480
Speaker 1: that I'm working on in my career, and I need

458
00:21:53,520 --> 00:21:56,840
Speaker 1: your help. I need your support, and you know, here's

459
00:21:56,840 --> 00:21:59,360
Speaker 1: what you can do to help me. And tell them specifically,

460
00:21:59,760 --> 00:22:03,160
Speaker 1: you know, because my husband when we I was building

461
00:22:03,160 --> 00:22:05,720
Speaker 1: my business and my husband was staying home at home

462
00:22:05,760 --> 00:22:08,239
Speaker 1: with the kids because he hated his job and I

463
00:22:08,280 --> 00:22:11,520
Speaker 1: loved my job and like was creating more and more opportunity.

464
00:22:11,520 --> 00:22:13,320
Speaker 1: And I was like, you stay home with these kids,

465
00:22:13,840 --> 00:22:16,840
Speaker 1: let me do my thing, and like we'll be golden,

466
00:22:17,080 --> 00:22:19,480
Speaker 1: you know. And so he's like awesome, and he's like military.

467
00:22:19,600 --> 00:22:22,680
Speaker 1: He has got timers going on whole day, like, oh,

468
00:22:22,760 --> 00:22:24,960
Speaker 1: laundry's done. Oh time to pick up this one, you know,

469
00:22:25,080 --> 00:22:28,440
Speaker 1: like time for this one to eat. And so he's

470
00:22:28,680 --> 00:22:33,439
Speaker 1: very much more organized than I ever was. So you know,

471
00:22:33,520 --> 00:22:35,640
Speaker 1: that helped, and that worked, and there were still times

472
00:22:35,640 --> 00:22:37,720
Speaker 1: where we would get unbalanced, but I would just ask

473
00:22:37,800 --> 00:22:39,639
Speaker 1: him for help and ask for his support and tell

474
00:22:39,680 --> 00:22:41,400
Speaker 1: him exactly what I needed. And there were times where

475
00:22:41,440 --> 00:22:44,359
Speaker 1: he had to come to me and be like, you know,

476
00:22:44,440 --> 00:22:46,080
Speaker 1: I know you're working and stuff, but like on the

477
00:22:46,080 --> 00:22:47,840
Speaker 1: weekends you could step it up.

478
00:22:48,040 --> 00:22:48,240
Speaker 7: You know.

479
00:22:48,480 --> 00:22:51,520
Speaker 1: So he's the one telling me, like, you need to

480
00:22:51,520 --> 00:22:54,520
Speaker 1: do better. And and there were times where he was

481
00:22:54,560 --> 00:22:57,480
Speaker 1: just like walking around passive aggressive. I knew was pissed.

482
00:22:57,520 --> 00:22:59,520
Speaker 1: I didn't know about what. I had no idea, Like

483
00:22:59,600 --> 00:23:01,920
Speaker 1: I really felt clueless because I was just so busy

484
00:23:01,960 --> 00:23:04,439
Speaker 1: doing my own thing. And until he specifically spelled it

485
00:23:04,440 --> 00:23:07,200
Speaker 1: out and said this is what I want you specifically

486
00:23:07,240 --> 00:23:10,159
Speaker 1: to do. I was like, okay, done, but he was

487
00:23:10,200 --> 00:23:12,119
Speaker 1: mad at me because I didn't automatically know. And I

488
00:23:12,160 --> 00:23:14,040
Speaker 1: think we as women do that a lot too, right.

489
00:23:14,080 --> 00:23:16,639
Speaker 1: We're like, I just need you to know. I just

490
00:23:16,680 --> 00:23:18,640
Speaker 1: need you to know what I want obviously, I want

491
00:23:18,680 --> 00:23:20,399
Speaker 1: you to do that, right, And it's like it's not

492
00:23:20,520 --> 00:23:25,440
Speaker 1: obvious to them for whatever annoying reason. So we got

493
00:23:25,440 --> 00:23:26,000
Speaker 1: to spell it out.

494
00:23:26,280 --> 00:23:28,520
Speaker 3: Yes you did. We're simple creatures. Just tell us straight

495
00:23:28,600 --> 00:23:31,840
Speaker 3: up and we'll do it. You know, we just need direction, Rachel,

496
00:23:31,840 --> 00:23:35,719
Speaker 3: has it ever been because admittedly, to be honest, you know,

497
00:23:35,840 --> 00:23:40,520
Speaker 3: Janna's the breadwinner in our relationship and has been pretty

498
00:23:40,560 --> 00:23:43,879
Speaker 3: much since the beginning when we were together, because I

499
00:23:43,880 --> 00:23:47,159
Speaker 3: was just coming out of football and I've had my

500
00:23:47,240 --> 00:23:52,320
Speaker 3: moments and still have my moments of insecurity, a feeling

501
00:23:52,400 --> 00:23:57,320
Speaker 3: like I'm not man, like those old time thoughts of

502
00:23:57,600 --> 00:23:59,880
Speaker 3: I'm not a man because I'm not providing for my family.

503
00:24:00,119 --> 00:24:02,919
Speaker 3: I wish I could do more. I you know, you know,

504
00:24:02,920 --> 00:24:06,280
Speaker 3: I have these thoughts. Even though she will say, you know,

505
00:24:07,720 --> 00:24:10,439
Speaker 3: motivating things to me or positive things to me, I'll

506
00:24:10,440 --> 00:24:12,960
Speaker 3: still feel that way. Internally. So have you and your

507
00:24:13,040 --> 00:24:16,040
Speaker 3: husband dealt with that overcome that, Like, what's been that time?

508
00:24:16,119 --> 00:24:16,239
Speaker 2: Nay?

509
00:24:16,280 --> 00:24:20,280
Speaker 1: Make definitely, you know, he's you know, And I think

510
00:24:20,359 --> 00:24:22,520
Speaker 1: it's because it's just not a precedent for it, right,

511
00:24:22,560 --> 00:24:25,560
Speaker 1: Like it's not it wasn't as common. It's becoming a

512
00:24:25,600 --> 00:24:29,320
Speaker 1: lot more common actually now, but for a long time,

513
00:24:29,480 --> 00:24:31,600
Speaker 1: Like that's not what we were taught when we were kids, right,

514
00:24:31,640 --> 00:24:33,640
Speaker 1: we were taught like dad goes out to work, Mom

515
00:24:33,720 --> 00:24:35,600
Speaker 1: does like the house stuff, and even if mom has

516
00:24:35,600 --> 00:24:37,240
Speaker 1: a job, she's still the one that you're kind of

517
00:24:37,280 --> 00:24:40,640
Speaker 1: relying on, you know, when you come home from school.

518
00:24:40,720 --> 00:24:43,680
Speaker 1: And so I think that's why it's kind of challenging.

519
00:24:43,720 --> 00:24:45,159
Speaker 1: But I think you just have to work through it

520
00:24:45,200 --> 00:24:48,840
Speaker 1: together and be frequently communicating about it. And so that's

521
00:24:48,880 --> 00:24:51,040
Speaker 1: what my husband and I have done, and I think

522
00:24:51,080 --> 00:24:52,840
Speaker 1: it was also here was one of the things that

523
00:24:52,920 --> 00:24:54,919
Speaker 1: was super important for us, that was crucial in our

524
00:24:54,960 --> 00:24:57,320
Speaker 1: relationship and like created a turning point with the whole

525
00:24:57,359 --> 00:25:00,399
Speaker 1: breadwinner issue, and that was like he he needed to

526
00:25:00,440 --> 00:25:03,080
Speaker 1: have his own money because I brought in literally one

527
00:25:03,160 --> 00:25:07,439
Speaker 1: hundred percent of our income, right, and so he felt

528
00:25:07,480 --> 00:25:09,959
Speaker 1: like he was spending my money all the time, and

529
00:25:10,000 --> 00:25:12,320
Speaker 1: it was really and like he loves cars, he wants

530
00:25:12,359 --> 00:25:15,480
Speaker 1: to buy car parts, he wants to work on his cars.

531
00:25:14,840 --> 00:25:18,920
Speaker 3: He was, yeah, that's how I am. I'm a tinkerer,

532
00:25:19,440 --> 00:25:20,359
Speaker 3: yes exactly.

533
00:25:20,800 --> 00:25:22,920
Speaker 1: And so he felt like he couldn't do that because

534
00:25:22,920 --> 00:25:25,640
Speaker 1: it's like it's just for him, it's not for the family.

535
00:25:26,440 --> 00:25:28,880
Speaker 1: And so he was like not saying that he wanted that,

536
00:25:29,000 --> 00:25:32,560
Speaker 1: but like putting it off and obviously upset about because

537
00:25:32,560 --> 00:25:34,480
Speaker 1: he's like, I sacrifice so much. I work so hard

538
00:25:34,480 --> 00:25:36,760
Speaker 1: for this family. I do so much for us, and

539
00:25:36,800 --> 00:25:38,520
Speaker 1: I feel like I can enjoy my life because I

540
00:25:38,520 --> 00:25:40,760
Speaker 1: don't have my own money. And I'm like, okay, well,

541
00:25:40,760 --> 00:25:42,960
Speaker 1: like let's get you your own money then, And we

542
00:25:43,040 --> 00:25:46,119
Speaker 1: literally created a separate bank accounts, so we have like

543
00:25:46,440 --> 00:25:48,640
Speaker 1: the main joint account where all of our money goes

544
00:25:48,640 --> 00:25:51,320
Speaker 1: in together, you know, like all of my income and

545
00:25:51,359 --> 00:25:53,439
Speaker 1: if he has stuff that goes on from time to

546
00:25:53,440 --> 00:25:56,760
Speaker 1: time where he has money come in, and then he

547
00:25:57,000 --> 00:26:00,760
Speaker 1: we have two separate bank accounts with like our play right,

548
00:26:00,840 --> 00:26:03,800
Speaker 1: and so like there's a separate amount that's like automatically

549
00:26:03,800 --> 00:26:07,480
Speaker 1: transferred into those two separate checking accounts. It's like Rachel's

550
00:26:07,520 --> 00:26:11,040
Speaker 1: money and Dediaco's money and like so then he had

551
00:26:11,040 --> 00:26:13,400
Speaker 1: his little his play money so he could do his thing,

552
00:26:13,920 --> 00:26:16,840
Speaker 1: and he was so much happier it was insane. I'm like,

553
00:26:17,040 --> 00:26:19,840
Speaker 1: I would have happily spent this money years ago, and

554
00:26:19,920 --> 00:26:24,160
Speaker 1: you told me, I'm glad you're happier, Like it's less

555
00:26:24,160 --> 00:26:26,040
Speaker 1: of an issue, you know, And I think it's just

556
00:26:26,080 --> 00:26:29,920
Speaker 1: important that everybody knows, like here's how I'm valued, Here's

557
00:26:29,920 --> 00:26:32,720
Speaker 1: how I'm adding value to our family life. You know,

558
00:26:32,840 --> 00:26:36,399
Speaker 1: everybody needs to feel that, otherwise you feel crappy, you know.

559
00:26:37,320 --> 00:26:41,119
Speaker 1: So I think having those conversations and just making sure

560
00:26:41,280 --> 00:26:43,760
Speaker 1: like and for me, like I had to say more often,

561
00:26:43,880 --> 00:26:46,680
Speaker 1: like I really appreciate what you did with the kids.

562
00:26:46,720 --> 00:26:50,040
Speaker 1: I really appreciate how you took care of whatever. Like

563
00:26:50,080 --> 00:26:52,399
Speaker 1: we just did a renovation here when we moved in

564
00:26:52,400 --> 00:26:55,239
Speaker 1: to the ranch, and like he handled all of that.

565
00:26:55,320 --> 00:26:57,119
Speaker 1: He dealt with all the plumbers and all the things,

566
00:26:57,160 --> 00:26:58,560
Speaker 1: and I didn't have to do with that. And I

567
00:26:58,840 --> 00:27:01,919
Speaker 1: have to say that member to say, like I appreciate you,

568
00:27:02,160 --> 00:27:04,080
Speaker 1: and I need him to do the same for me, right,

569
00:27:04,200 --> 00:27:07,320
Speaker 1: Like That's that's an important part of it. So and

570
00:27:07,400 --> 00:27:09,920
Speaker 1: also therapy, you know, like therapy helps.

571
00:27:09,720 --> 00:27:12,399
Speaker 3: To Oh yeah, we're big advocates about that. Yeah, I

572
00:27:12,440 --> 00:27:15,040
Speaker 3: was just I was just gonna ask you, does he reciprocate,

573
00:27:15,200 --> 00:27:17,280
Speaker 3: you know, his gratitude to what you do as well,

574
00:27:17,359 --> 00:27:19,960
Speaker 3: because like you said, that's I mean, it's equally as important.

575
00:27:20,760 --> 00:27:23,400
Speaker 1: Yeah it is. I think he does. And I mean

576
00:27:23,880 --> 00:27:26,320
Speaker 1: we could both do it more, right, Like we could

577
00:27:26,359 --> 00:27:29,199
Speaker 1: both be better about it. It's so funny. I had

578
00:27:29,240 --> 00:27:32,600
Speaker 1: a friend who's a business owner, and she used to say,

579
00:27:32,640 --> 00:27:35,959
Speaker 1: like her team needs to hear her praise and compliments

580
00:27:35,960 --> 00:27:38,119
Speaker 1: from time to time, right, And so she had a

581
00:27:38,200 --> 00:27:41,400
Speaker 1: reminder in her phone for like every Friday, give out

582
00:27:41,400 --> 00:27:45,640
Speaker 1: cookies is what it was called. It was a reminder

583
00:27:45,680 --> 00:27:47,399
Speaker 1: for her to like, oh, let me give out some

584
00:27:47,440 --> 00:27:50,280
Speaker 1: compliments to people, like everybody on my team. And I

585
00:27:50,280 --> 00:27:52,159
Speaker 1: feel like we should do that, Like we should just

586
00:27:52,240 --> 00:27:55,240
Speaker 1: all put reminders on our phones, like like let me

587
00:27:55,280 --> 00:27:57,440
Speaker 1: compliment my partner about something.

588
00:27:57,560 --> 00:27:59,280
Speaker 3: Affirmation Fridays. Baby, let's do it.

589
00:27:59,359 --> 00:28:00,000
Speaker 1: Yea, that's exactly.

590
00:28:01,400 --> 00:28:04,439
Speaker 2: We kind of started that every day just saying like

591
00:28:04,480 --> 00:28:06,400
Speaker 2: what we're grateful for each other.

592
00:28:07,880 --> 00:28:11,760
Speaker 3: Yeah, because we found ourselves starting the day almost feeling

593
00:28:11,840 --> 00:28:15,119
Speaker 3: like enemies. Yeah, like because we're in a rut there

594
00:28:15,160 --> 00:28:17,000
Speaker 3: for a while, and we're like, what you know, so

595
00:28:17,119 --> 00:28:20,080
Speaker 3: the littlest things could just set us off or push

596
00:28:20,160 --> 00:28:22,760
Speaker 3: us away. When it's like and I think it's been

597
00:28:22,800 --> 00:28:24,800
Speaker 3: helpful the last few weeks. He's like waking up in

598
00:28:24,840 --> 00:28:26,880
Speaker 3: the morning and just telling each other, Yeah, what we're

599
00:28:26,960 --> 00:28:29,840
Speaker 3: grateful for, that we appreciate one another, because then you

600
00:28:29,880 --> 00:28:32,040
Speaker 3: already feel connected, right instead of just a good morning,

601
00:28:32,080 --> 00:28:34,119
Speaker 3: I love you. So that's definitely helped us.

602
00:28:34,200 --> 00:28:35,800
Speaker 2: Yeah, I think it has two for sure.

603
00:28:35,960 --> 00:28:38,480
Speaker 1: I love that it's like a reframe of the day, right,

604
00:28:38,600 --> 00:28:40,480
Speaker 1: Like you could start the day being cranky about whatever

605
00:28:40,560 --> 00:28:42,920
Speaker 1: is going on, or you could start the day being grateful.

606
00:28:43,240 --> 00:28:45,640
Speaker 2: Yeah, and for each other, because usually we do make

607
00:28:45,680 --> 00:28:47,600
Speaker 2: each other out to be, you know, the enemy. But

608
00:28:47,640 --> 00:28:50,640
Speaker 2: I will say though, for Mike, like he's he like

609
00:28:51,040 --> 00:28:53,040
Speaker 2: is so great with a lot of the household stuff,

610
00:28:53,080 --> 00:28:55,720
Speaker 2: and we really do do it together, like we're we're

611
00:28:56,120 --> 00:28:57,960
Speaker 2: minus cooking. I don't I can't cook, but.

612
00:28:57,920 --> 00:29:00,800
Speaker 3: Yeah, I think the two things that are more separate

613
00:29:00,920 --> 00:29:04,760
Speaker 3: is like Jana pretty much does the laundry, especially pretty much,

614
00:29:05,080 --> 00:29:06,640
Speaker 3: and then I do the cooking.

615
00:29:06,800 --> 00:29:08,840
Speaker 2: Yeah, everything else and everything else.

616
00:29:08,680 --> 00:29:12,280
Speaker 3: We just we both do. But those are our lanes

617
00:29:12,320 --> 00:29:13,040
Speaker 3: of expertise.

618
00:29:13,480 --> 00:29:15,880
Speaker 2: How And it's interesting too because when you say that,

619
00:29:16,080 --> 00:29:19,080
Speaker 2: you know, gosh, would I love to hire a chef? Like, yeah,

620
00:29:19,280 --> 00:29:21,920
Speaker 2: I would love it. But I think I'm so fearful

621
00:29:22,040 --> 00:29:25,080
Speaker 2: of you know, I've never I didn't grow up having money.

622
00:29:25,080 --> 00:29:27,960
Speaker 2: My mom worked three jobs, you know, divorced family. It

623
00:29:28,040 --> 00:29:29,760
Speaker 2: was like if I wanted something, I had to buy it,

624
00:29:29,840 --> 00:29:31,400
Speaker 2: I had to work for it, I had to get it.

625
00:29:31,880 --> 00:29:35,680
Speaker 2: And so now that you know I am seeing income

626
00:29:35,760 --> 00:29:38,280
Speaker 2: and money, I think I'm so afraid to lose the

627
00:29:38,320 --> 00:29:41,240
Speaker 2: money that I'm afraid to spend it on things that

628
00:29:41,280 --> 00:29:42,360
Speaker 2: could potentially help me.

629
00:29:43,000 --> 00:29:46,480
Speaker 1: Yes, well, see this is a prime example of a

630
00:29:46,520 --> 00:29:51,400
Speaker 1: broken ass decision, right like, because and I grew up

631
00:29:51,400 --> 00:29:54,880
Speaker 1: the same way like you know we I was embarrassed

632
00:29:54,920 --> 00:29:57,320
Speaker 1: to use food stamps at the grocery store, like hoping

633
00:29:57,360 --> 00:29:59,720
Speaker 1: my friends didn't come in so that they wouldn't see us,

634
00:29:59,760 --> 00:30:03,200
Speaker 1: you know, So like I definitely had There was no

635
00:30:03,240 --> 00:30:05,200
Speaker 1: one in my family I had been to college or

636
00:30:05,240 --> 00:30:08,000
Speaker 1: grad school or any of that, you know, So I

637
00:30:08,040 --> 00:30:12,280
Speaker 1: had that same story and experience. And you know, I think,

638
00:30:13,160 --> 00:30:15,520
Speaker 1: here's here's what I want you to look at instead

639
00:30:15,560 --> 00:30:18,360
Speaker 1: of thinking like, well, I don't know, I'm afraid to

640
00:30:18,400 --> 00:30:21,720
Speaker 1: lose that money. It's almost like by making these sort

641
00:30:21,720 --> 00:30:25,920
Speaker 1: of decisions that kind of keep us smaller, you're more

642
00:30:26,120 --> 00:30:28,320
Speaker 1: likely to lose the money that way than you are

643
00:30:28,400 --> 00:30:31,480
Speaker 1: if you keep building up support, because the more successful

644
00:30:31,520 --> 00:30:35,560
Speaker 1: you become, the more support you need. And that's the reality.

645
00:30:35,560 --> 00:30:39,680
Speaker 1: I mean, this is why, like you know, like Jeff Bezos,

646
00:30:39,720 --> 00:30:42,080
Speaker 1: I'm sure probably the worst example, but like I'm sure

647
00:30:42,120 --> 00:30:44,240
Speaker 1: he has a whole bunch of staff, right, Like the

648
00:30:44,360 --> 00:30:46,760
Speaker 1: more and if you think about it, like you're creating

649
00:30:46,760 --> 00:30:49,719
Speaker 1: this sort of microeconomy where all of these people around

650
00:30:49,760 --> 00:30:51,960
Speaker 1: you are benefiting from the work that you're doing. By

651
00:30:52,080 --> 00:30:55,400
Speaker 1: having a business, by having a podcast, right, by having

652
00:30:55,960 --> 00:30:58,239
Speaker 1: certain things that you're creating in the world. There are

653
00:30:58,240 --> 00:31:01,040
Speaker 1: other people that benefit from that. So how can you

654
00:31:01,120 --> 00:31:04,760
Speaker 1: do more of that? Like to like it hurts me

655
00:31:04,920 --> 00:31:13,120
Speaker 1: to know that you do laundry absolutely not outsource this, And.

656
00:31:13,000 --> 00:31:15,080
Speaker 2: In my mid I'm like, oh, I got like, you know,

657
00:31:15,480 --> 00:31:17,920
Speaker 2: right before the podcast, I was folding things and getting

658
00:31:17,960 --> 00:31:20,080
Speaker 2: ready for what I do afterwards, and you know, I

659
00:31:20,080 --> 00:31:23,440
Speaker 2: don't know, I just like we're making it obviously work.

660
00:31:23,640 --> 00:31:25,920
Speaker 3: Jannah gets anxiety if she has nothing to do in

661
00:31:25,960 --> 00:31:29,600
Speaker 3: every single moment. So it's almost like, and I love,

662
00:31:29,960 --> 00:31:31,840
Speaker 3: I feel like I might be putting words in your mouth,

663
00:31:31,880 --> 00:31:33,600
Speaker 3: but it's almost like time is money, right, is what

664
00:31:33,600 --> 00:31:35,960
Speaker 3: you're saying. So if you're wasting time doing those things

665
00:31:35,960 --> 00:31:38,800
Speaker 3: that aren't earning you money, then it's a waste of time.

666
00:31:38,840 --> 00:31:40,360
Speaker 2: It's true though, because I mean there's so many things

667
00:31:40,400 --> 00:31:42,320
Speaker 2: in the day that like I still have a list

668
00:31:42,360 --> 00:31:43,960
Speaker 2: of things that I wish I would have done this

669
00:31:44,080 --> 00:31:45,960
Speaker 2: year that I'm like, hey, if I maybe didn't do

670
00:31:46,720 --> 00:31:49,960
Speaker 2: the laundry or these certain things, like I would have

671
00:31:50,000 --> 00:31:52,000
Speaker 2: more time to like finally get a blog that I

672
00:31:52,040 --> 00:31:54,120
Speaker 2: want to start doing, and like, you know, do other

673
00:31:54,160 --> 00:31:56,840
Speaker 2: things that like I could really that could make money,

674
00:31:56,880 --> 00:31:59,280
Speaker 2: you know, as opposed to me folding the laundry.

675
00:32:00,480 --> 00:32:02,960
Speaker 1: And it's not just like I'm also a big advocate

676
00:32:03,000 --> 00:32:04,880
Speaker 1: for self care because I think that's a part of

677
00:32:04,920 --> 00:32:08,680
Speaker 1: making money, right, Like, instead of doing laundry on the weekends,

678
00:32:08,720 --> 00:32:13,040
Speaker 1: like rest, you know, like actually sleep, like hang out

679
00:32:13,080 --> 00:32:15,959
Speaker 1: with your kids, right, like do whatever restores you so

680
00:32:16,000 --> 00:32:18,640
Speaker 1: that you start the week feeling energetic and like maybe

681
00:32:18,680 --> 00:32:21,480
Speaker 1: ready to take on some of those other projects that

682
00:32:21,920 --> 00:32:24,520
Speaker 1: you know, when you're starting something new, there's more lift involved,

683
00:32:24,640 --> 00:32:27,840
Speaker 1: right versus keeping something going. So I think that's a

684
00:32:27,840 --> 00:32:28,640
Speaker 1: big part of it as.

685
00:32:28,560 --> 00:32:32,200
Speaker 2: Well as a business coach. I'm curious when there's because

686
00:32:32,200 --> 00:32:34,720
Speaker 2: there's a lot of people that DM me and you know,

687
00:32:34,720 --> 00:32:36,400
Speaker 2: they either want to be a singer and actress, or

688
00:32:36,400 --> 00:32:37,920
Speaker 2: they want to start a business, or they've got this

689
00:32:38,000 --> 00:32:40,920
Speaker 2: idea or they've got this product, but they're like, you know,

690
00:32:41,720 --> 00:32:44,120
Speaker 2: how do I even get started? Or they feel like

691
00:32:44,160 --> 00:32:46,920
Speaker 2: they don't have the right connections. Are those like what

692
00:32:46,960 --> 00:32:49,880
Speaker 2: do you say to those people to like to it's

693
00:32:49,920 --> 00:32:51,520
Speaker 2: like do you put all your eggs in one basket

694
00:32:51,600 --> 00:32:54,120
Speaker 2: or do you keep doing other things and then work

695
00:32:54,160 --> 00:32:56,720
Speaker 2: your way into the one big basket? Right?

696
00:32:57,160 --> 00:32:59,160
Speaker 1: Well, I mean there is the reality that we have

697
00:32:59,280 --> 00:33:01,240
Speaker 1: we have to make money, right, So, like if you've

698
00:33:01,240 --> 00:33:04,320
Speaker 1: got a vision or business or a creative endeavor that

699
00:33:04,360 --> 00:33:08,160
Speaker 1: you want to pursue, like that's like a you do

700
00:33:08,240 --> 00:33:10,320
Speaker 1: it as a side hustle while you're running your business,

701
00:33:10,560 --> 00:33:13,560
Speaker 1: you know. And that's what I did when I was

702
00:33:13,760 --> 00:33:16,760
Speaker 1: like starting my first business. I went to law school,

703
00:33:16,840 --> 00:33:18,840
Speaker 1: I became a lawyer. I really wanted to start my

704
00:33:18,880 --> 00:33:20,240
Speaker 1: own business because I didn't want to work at a

705
00:33:20,280 --> 00:33:22,640
Speaker 1: crazy law firm where they like throw staplers at your

706
00:33:22,640 --> 00:33:24,160
Speaker 1: head and scream at you all day.

707
00:33:24,840 --> 00:33:25,080
Speaker 2: You know.

708
00:33:25,800 --> 00:33:29,840
Speaker 1: And so you know, while I was doing like clerking

709
00:33:29,880 --> 00:33:31,880
Speaker 1: for a judge, which was like my first job out

710
00:33:31,880 --> 00:33:34,080
Speaker 1: of law school, I was like putting my plans in

711
00:33:34,160 --> 00:33:37,600
Speaker 1: place for starting my own practice. And one of the

712
00:33:37,600 --> 00:33:40,160
Speaker 1: best things I did was start like just connecting with

713
00:33:40,240 --> 00:33:42,800
Speaker 1: people on Twitter and like meeting them, and then I

714
00:33:42,840 --> 00:33:46,320
Speaker 1: started a blog to like start to build up an audience, right,

715
00:33:46,400 --> 00:33:48,600
Speaker 1: so like, and then I just emailed everyone that I

716
00:33:48,680 --> 00:33:50,959
Speaker 1: knew and was like, hey, I'm starting a law practice

717
00:33:51,080 --> 00:33:54,240
Speaker 1: on September one, twenty ten. If you have these kinds

718
00:33:54,280 --> 00:33:56,600
Speaker 1: of legal issues, I can help you do it. And

719
00:33:56,680 --> 00:33:58,880
Speaker 1: I just put myself out there and that's how I

720
00:33:58,880 --> 00:34:00,560
Speaker 1: got my first three clients. So as soon as my

721
00:34:00,560 --> 00:34:03,360
Speaker 1: clerkship was over, I had three clients in hand, and

722
00:34:03,400 --> 00:34:05,560
Speaker 1: it wasn't a lot of money. It's like embarrassing how

723
00:34:05,560 --> 00:34:08,920
Speaker 1: little I charge them. But then that was enough to

724
00:34:08,960 --> 00:34:11,919
Speaker 1: start to give me momentum and put myself out there

725
00:34:12,040 --> 00:34:15,040
Speaker 1: and then eventually build a website and do other things. Right,

726
00:34:15,080 --> 00:34:17,160
Speaker 1: It's like we think we need to have like the

727
00:34:17,200 --> 00:34:19,200
Speaker 1: ten step planned for the next ten years. No, we

728
00:34:19,280 --> 00:34:21,360
Speaker 1: just have to have the courage to take the first step,

729
00:34:21,560 --> 00:34:24,759
Speaker 1: you know, and what is that? And we also have

730
00:34:24,840 --> 00:34:27,200
Speaker 1: to like walk towards it. We can't just like wait

731
00:34:27,239 --> 00:34:30,000
Speaker 1: for it to show up, you know. Yeah, we can't

732
00:34:30,040 --> 00:34:31,680
Speaker 1: wait for it to come our way. You know.

733
00:34:32,320 --> 00:34:35,040
Speaker 2: Well, Rachel, I, first of all, I'm excited for you too,

734
00:34:35,040 --> 00:34:37,040
Speaker 2: because you have a book coming out on May fourth,

735
00:34:37,080 --> 00:34:39,520
Speaker 2: twenty twenty one. It's available for pre order right now.

736
00:34:39,520 --> 00:34:41,799
Speaker 2: It's called We Should All Be Millionaires. So I'm going

737
00:34:41,880 --> 00:34:44,320
Speaker 2: to go to Amazon right now and pre order that book.

738
00:34:45,360 --> 00:34:48,520
Speaker 2: But just thank you for shedding some light and everyone

739
00:34:48,600 --> 00:34:52,319
Speaker 2: can go to Hello seven dot co to read all

740
00:34:52,320 --> 00:34:56,719
Speaker 2: about Rachel and her mission and all of your work

741
00:34:56,719 --> 00:34:59,360
Speaker 2: that you're doing. So thank you for just being an

742
00:34:59,400 --> 00:35:03,280
Speaker 2: inspiration for women and people out there to keep keep grinding,

743
00:35:03,400 --> 00:35:06,239
Speaker 2: keep grinding, making that money. And but the next time

744
00:35:06,239 --> 00:35:09,040
Speaker 2: I talk to you, Rachel, I'm gonna have a chef. Yes,

745
00:35:09,360 --> 00:35:11,040
Speaker 2: you can't replace laundry.

746
00:35:12,440 --> 00:35:14,799
Speaker 3: No more laundry, that would be great.

747
00:35:15,800 --> 00:35:18,560
Speaker 2: I can't stand folding his socks. He's got so many socks.

748
00:35:19,040 --> 00:35:20,719
Speaker 2: The man wears two pairs of socks on a day.

749
00:35:20,719 --> 00:35:23,280
Speaker 2: So just imagine how many socks I'm having to unfold

750
00:35:23,320 --> 00:35:27,440
Speaker 2: and refold. Lord Rachel, thank you so much for coming on.

751
00:35:27,480 --> 00:35:29,919
Speaker 2: Wine down and everyone go get her book. We should

752
00:35:29,960 --> 00:35:30,759
Speaker 2: all be millionaires.

753
00:35:31,400 --> 00:35:32,719
Speaker 1: Thank you so much for having me.

754
00:35:33,719 --> 00:35:48,919
Speaker 2: You're so sweet. Thank you. Okay, she is so fun.

755
00:35:48,960 --> 00:35:51,480
Speaker 2: I love her energy. I don't know why it gives

756
00:35:51,520 --> 00:35:54,640
Speaker 2: me anxiety to like, I'm like, why would I hire

757
00:35:54,800 --> 00:35:56,319
Speaker 2: someone off for laundry? Like I can just do it,

758
00:35:56,640 --> 00:35:58,680
Speaker 2: you know what I mean, Like because I'm so I

759
00:35:58,680 --> 00:36:02,120
Speaker 2: don't want to waste not waste money, but because I'm like,

760
00:36:02,120 --> 00:36:03,120
Speaker 2: you can do it all.

761
00:36:04,640 --> 00:36:05,520
Speaker 3: You can take over the world.

762
00:36:05,520 --> 00:36:06,480
Speaker 2: You can take over the world.

763
00:36:07,160 --> 00:36:09,520
Speaker 3: I mean, I like her her concept though, because it

764
00:36:09,560 --> 00:36:11,360
Speaker 3: is it's just coming down to time is money. And

765
00:36:11,400 --> 00:36:15,240
Speaker 3: if if you're using the time instead of doing laundry

766
00:36:15,320 --> 00:36:19,200
Speaker 3: to be doing something productive, then you're doing it for

767
00:36:19,239 --> 00:36:19,840
Speaker 3: the right reason.

768
00:36:20,200 --> 00:36:20,439
Speaker 5: Yeah.

769
00:36:21,040 --> 00:36:23,160
Speaker 3: If you're doing it just not to do it, then

770
00:36:23,200 --> 00:36:23,879
Speaker 3: we wouldn't be.

771
00:36:24,600 --> 00:36:26,400
Speaker 2: I think I just have the mindset, Like I totally

772
00:36:26,400 --> 00:36:28,319
Speaker 2: get it and I love it. I think I just

773
00:36:28,360 --> 00:36:30,319
Speaker 2: have the mindset. I'm like, you can do it all,

774
00:36:30,920 --> 00:36:32,000
Speaker 2: and you can save money in.

775
00:36:32,000 --> 00:36:35,200
Speaker 3: The process, but you can also ask for help.

776
00:36:36,480 --> 00:36:39,719
Speaker 2: Yeah, I got you, and you got me, and I'm

777
00:36:39,760 --> 00:36:44,520
Speaker 2: free exactly. I mean you want to, like, we can

778
00:36:44,600 --> 00:36:46,560
Speaker 2: dress you up in a cute little thing, and you know,

779
00:36:46,600 --> 00:36:48,960
Speaker 2: I can dress up and do the dishwasher and we

780
00:36:49,000 --> 00:36:52,440
Speaker 2: can role play the hell out of this. Yeah. Okay,

781
00:36:52,480 --> 00:36:54,920
Speaker 2: So you teased the Kelly Clarkson thing earlier, and I

782
00:36:54,960 --> 00:37:01,480
Speaker 2: really don't like want to get into their us. You know,

783
00:37:01,520 --> 00:37:07,879
Speaker 2: I don't want to. It stinks because I never want

784
00:37:07,960 --> 00:37:10,239
Speaker 2: us well, I never want people like talking about relationship,

785
00:37:10,239 --> 00:37:13,960
Speaker 2: but our relationships out there, so it should be a

786
00:37:13,960 --> 00:37:18,120
Speaker 2: topic of conversation. I'm not trying to get in there stuff,

787
00:37:18,160 --> 00:37:20,279
Speaker 2: like I said, However, I do have feelings around it,

788
00:37:20,320 --> 00:37:21,120
Speaker 2: and it bothers me.

789
00:37:22,200 --> 00:37:25,960
Speaker 3: What Jana is alluding to is that Kelly's.

790
00:37:27,120 --> 00:37:28,400
Speaker 2: X soon to.

791
00:37:28,400 --> 00:37:30,239
Speaker 3: Be ex husband.

792
00:37:31,480 --> 00:37:34,000
Speaker 2: Is asking for four hundred and thirty six thousand dollars

793
00:37:34,040 --> 00:37:39,120
Speaker 2: a month in spousal support. And I brought it up

794
00:37:39,160 --> 00:37:43,120
Speaker 2: to Mike and I was angry, Like I was so angry,

795
00:37:43,200 --> 00:37:45,440
Speaker 2: and he's like why, He's like, what if what if

796
00:37:45,480 --> 00:37:46,440
Speaker 2: the roles were reversed?

797
00:37:47,800 --> 00:37:50,160
Speaker 3: What's Brandon Brandon block suck.

798
00:37:50,320 --> 00:37:54,000
Speaker 2: Yeah, he's you know, manager, and his dad and was.

799
00:37:54,000 --> 00:37:57,240
Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, his dad's married to Reba was they got divorced.

800
00:37:57,280 --> 00:37:59,040
Speaker 2: When divorced a couple of years ago.

801
00:38:00,000 --> 00:38:01,280
Speaker 3: They're married since like the eighties.

802
00:38:01,680 --> 00:38:05,000
Speaker 2: Yeah, so, and Mike brought.

803
00:38:04,920 --> 00:38:08,080
Speaker 3: Up a good point like, yeah, if the if the

804
00:38:08,200 --> 00:38:09,640
Speaker 3: roles were reversed.

805
00:38:10,080 --> 00:38:12,960
Speaker 2: And here's what I say to that. I think it's

806
00:38:13,120 --> 00:38:17,320
Speaker 2: I think what he's doing is extremely spiteful. He has money. Yeah,

807
00:38:17,360 --> 00:38:23,200
Speaker 2: I think it's very spiteful because it's not like they've

808
00:38:23,200 --> 00:38:25,280
Speaker 2: been married for years and years and years and years

809
00:38:25,880 --> 00:38:28,919
Speaker 2: and he has been how many years have they been married?

810
00:38:28,920 --> 00:38:32,560
Speaker 2: For it? Just it just feels very spiteful.

811
00:38:33,560 --> 00:38:34,400
Speaker 3: Under ten years.

812
00:38:35,880 --> 00:38:38,080
Speaker 2: It was like, uh, Easton, can you find out how.

813
00:38:38,000 --> 00:38:39,520
Speaker 3: Long twenty twelve.

814
00:38:40,719 --> 00:38:45,960
Speaker 2: Under ten years he has been working? He he has money,

815
00:38:46,120 --> 00:38:49,719
Speaker 2: I know, like he's again a very successful guy, networks

816
00:38:49,760 --> 00:38:51,120
Speaker 2: from a very successful family.

817
00:38:51,239 --> 00:38:53,440
Speaker 3: Net worth around ten million apparently.

818
00:38:53,000 --> 00:38:55,680
Speaker 2: Okay, he has a lot of money. It feels so

819
00:38:55,880 --> 00:38:58,480
Speaker 2: spiteful that he's going to now take four hundred and

820
00:38:58,480 --> 00:39:00,600
Speaker 2: thirty six thousand dollars in the money that she has

821
00:39:00,760 --> 00:39:05,960
Speaker 2: worked her tail off for her fricking seven years. They've

822
00:39:05,960 --> 00:39:08,120
Speaker 2: been married for seven years for her tail off for

823
00:39:08,840 --> 00:39:12,120
Speaker 2: that just it like, as a woman, that makes me

824
00:39:12,800 --> 00:39:16,240
Speaker 2: cringe inside and I want I'm angry for her because

825
00:39:16,239 --> 00:39:18,759
Speaker 2: it's not fair. That's not his money. He did not

826
00:39:18,960 --> 00:39:22,319
Speaker 2: work for that. Like, that's not his money, that is

827
00:39:22,360 --> 00:39:24,960
Speaker 2: her money that she worked her ass off for.

828
00:39:25,120 --> 00:39:28,600
Speaker 3: All right, let me ask you this, okay, okay, because

829
00:39:28,640 --> 00:39:31,120
Speaker 3: I totally I get your point, I get your your

830
00:39:31,280 --> 00:39:37,160
Speaker 3: energy behind it. Sorry, So you take your stereotypical what

831
00:39:37,320 --> 00:39:42,239
Speaker 3: society thinks is the household roles. Right. You take a

832
00:39:42,239 --> 00:39:46,320
Speaker 3: family like that, You take the husband who's making money

833
00:39:47,200 --> 00:39:49,600
Speaker 3: and they realized it would be they would save more

834
00:39:49,640 --> 00:39:51,040
Speaker 3: money if the wife would just stay at home and

835
00:39:51,120 --> 00:39:51,680
Speaker 3: raise the kids.

836
00:39:51,960 --> 00:39:54,399
Speaker 2: This is a different situation. Huh uh No, I would

837
00:39:54,520 --> 00:39:56,920
Speaker 2: please continue, but I have a rebuttal for it, right.

838
00:39:57,520 --> 00:40:02,240
Speaker 3: And say they get divorced? Okay? Would she not? Because

839
00:40:02,320 --> 00:40:04,319
Speaker 3: what you're saying is Kelly works so hard for that

840
00:40:04,400 --> 00:40:09,040
Speaker 3: money that she like it's unfair for him to take

841
00:40:09,120 --> 00:40:11,840
Speaker 3: what she's earned and worked for. So would it be

842
00:40:11,920 --> 00:40:14,879
Speaker 3: unfair for the housewife or house husband to take what

843
00:40:15,200 --> 00:40:17,040
Speaker 3: their spouse has worked so hard for?

844
00:40:17,800 --> 00:40:22,600
Speaker 2: Okay, Brandon hasn't. To my knowledge, Brandon has not stopped working.

845
00:40:22,800 --> 00:40:27,120
Speaker 2: He's makes a lot of money as a manager. Let's take,

846
00:40:27,120 --> 00:40:29,160
Speaker 2: for example, if it was one of our good friends.

847
00:40:29,480 --> 00:40:35,360
Speaker 2: Let's just call her Wesley. Let's say that her end M.

848
00:40:37,239 --> 00:40:42,400
Speaker 2: Joseph got divorced. They she quit her job because she

849
00:40:42,560 --> 00:40:44,600
Speaker 2: decided to be a stay at home mom and raise

850
00:40:44,640 --> 00:40:46,799
Speaker 2: the family, just like what you're saying, and be the

851
00:40:47,680 --> 00:40:53,320
Speaker 2: She is entitled to half because she she has held

852
00:40:53,360 --> 00:40:57,560
Speaker 2: the family together. She absolutely is entitled to half because

853
00:40:57,600 --> 00:41:04,000
Speaker 2: they have been married for a long time, A long time. Okay,

854
00:41:04,160 --> 00:41:08,320
Speaker 2: they've been married for twenty plus years. Okay, she's entitled

855
00:41:08,320 --> 00:41:12,880
Speaker 2: to that money. No, go ahead, you're smarking.

856
00:41:13,680 --> 00:41:17,319
Speaker 3: So, which I get because there is legality behind that,

857
00:41:17,440 --> 00:41:19,359
Speaker 3: like if you've been married a certain amount of time,

858
00:41:19,360 --> 00:41:20,880
Speaker 3: Like if you've been married like three years, yeah, I

859
00:41:20,920 --> 00:41:24,960
Speaker 3: don't think someone can necessarily take off, but seven years.

860
00:41:25,760 --> 00:41:28,240
Speaker 2: I mean, so I have a question for you, okay,

861
00:41:28,760 --> 00:41:31,600
Speaker 2: because like you said, with Rachel, I am technically the

862
00:41:31,640 --> 00:41:38,279
Speaker 2: breadwinner of the family, right, I truly believe. And this

863
00:41:38,440 --> 00:41:40,560
Speaker 2: is like I remember when we were going through divorced

864
00:41:40,560 --> 00:41:44,000
Speaker 2: stuff and I was like, he is going to ask

865
00:41:44,040 --> 00:41:46,440
Speaker 2: for spousal support and I'm going to want to run

866
00:41:46,520 --> 00:41:51,600
Speaker 2: him over with my car. Like I just remember having

867
00:41:51,600 --> 00:41:55,080
Speaker 2: that feeling of being like because it's like if there's

868
00:41:55,120 --> 00:41:58,080
Speaker 2: some kind of like not pride, but like I'm like,

869
00:41:58,239 --> 00:42:01,320
Speaker 2: I have worked my tailor off and he's going to

870
00:42:01,360 --> 00:42:04,319
Speaker 2: come now because of his poor decisions that have most

871
00:42:04,400 --> 00:42:07,120
Speaker 2: likely ended his marriage, he is going to now take

872
00:42:07,400 --> 00:42:11,120
Speaker 2: spousal support from me. And you say you're not, but

873
00:42:11,239 --> 00:42:13,840
Speaker 2: I just can tell by the smirk of your face.

874
00:42:14,320 --> 00:42:15,560
Speaker 3: I wouldn't, though.

875
00:42:15,600 --> 00:42:19,799
Speaker 2: Lies because you believe that you also have put in

876
00:42:19,840 --> 00:42:24,080
Speaker 2: the work in the miles to have to earn some

877
00:42:24,239 --> 00:42:27,640
Speaker 2: of that capital, which I don't.

878
00:42:27,800 --> 00:42:31,160
Speaker 3: That's not false, So then you would not saying that.

879
00:42:31,600 --> 00:42:34,600
Speaker 3: And I've even told you this when we're discussing this,

880
00:42:35,200 --> 00:42:37,120
Speaker 3: not on a podcast, just with one another. I said

881
00:42:37,480 --> 00:42:40,359
Speaker 3: I wouldn't out of spite, out of principle, just to

882
00:42:40,400 --> 00:42:43,040
Speaker 3: show you that you're not right that I wouldn't do that.

883
00:42:44,600 --> 00:42:47,440
Speaker 3: So I would not take it out of spite. But yes,

884
00:42:47,800 --> 00:42:53,120
Speaker 3: then you think about the relationships out there where maybe

885
00:42:53,120 --> 00:42:56,680
Speaker 3: they haven't been twenty plus years, but the other person

886
00:42:56,760 --> 00:43:04,080
Speaker 3: does sacrifice, make sacrifices so one person can be more

887
00:43:04,080 --> 00:43:05,319
Speaker 3: available for opportunities.

888
00:43:05,880 --> 00:43:08,319
Speaker 2: I mean, again, I totally hear you on that. It's

889
00:43:08,440 --> 00:43:12,560
Speaker 2: just if that is the conversation that was had, if

890
00:43:12,600 --> 00:43:15,319
Speaker 2: you've had a conversation saying I'm going to stay home

891
00:43:15,360 --> 00:43:18,719
Speaker 2: because this is going to benefit the household. That's a

892
00:43:18,840 --> 00:43:24,200
Speaker 2: totally different scenario, one thousand percent different scenario. Then you

893
00:43:24,239 --> 00:43:26,520
Speaker 2: would be I believe that person would be entitled to

894
00:43:26,680 --> 00:43:30,880
Speaker 2: having of course spousil support in some kind of check.

895
00:43:32,880 --> 00:43:35,719
Speaker 2: But that is what you have to agree on beforehand,

896
00:43:37,280 --> 00:43:39,880
Speaker 2: Like like if you know, if like you're staying like

897
00:43:39,880 --> 00:43:42,839
Speaker 2: you're not staying home, like you don't have a you know,

898
00:43:42,960 --> 00:43:46,120
Speaker 2: because you're the state at home dad. You're not a

899
00:43:46,160 --> 00:43:48,040
Speaker 2: stay at home dad. That's your decision, right.

900
00:43:48,040 --> 00:43:52,319
Speaker 3: But quitting my leaving my medical sales job, regardless of

901
00:43:52,320 --> 00:43:56,200
Speaker 3: other reasons. Part of that was the flexibility because I

902
00:43:56,320 --> 00:44:01,239
Speaker 3: was available, more available to go places with you that

903
00:44:01,280 --> 00:44:03,640
Speaker 3: you had to do for work to be there with

904
00:44:03,719 --> 00:44:06,520
Speaker 3: the kids. So you could go to a movie shoot

905
00:44:06,640 --> 00:44:09,600
Speaker 3: or go film something, or go do music shows and

906
00:44:09,640 --> 00:44:13,080
Speaker 3: bring the kids, or have a travel partner. So that

907
00:44:13,239 --> 00:44:15,680
Speaker 3: was a very high pro on the list of me

908
00:44:15,840 --> 00:44:18,000
Speaker 3: leaving my quote unquote normal job.

909
00:44:18,480 --> 00:44:20,040
Speaker 2: Would you like to get a normal job again?

910
00:44:21,960 --> 00:44:24,640
Speaker 3: No, because then if I do, then it's like, well,

911
00:44:24,960 --> 00:44:26,640
Speaker 3: why do you have to work today? Why can't you

912
00:44:26,680 --> 00:44:28,839
Speaker 3: just like take off and like not go and come with.

913
00:44:28,760 --> 00:44:32,440
Speaker 2: Me say what I would never say that, Mark. I

914
00:44:32,480 --> 00:44:35,680
Speaker 2: need your input on this, buddy good.

915
00:44:35,560 --> 00:44:37,080
Speaker 8: Because I've been chomping at the bit to get.

916
00:44:40,560 --> 00:44:43,759
Speaker 5: I look a couple of things, so many thoughts coming

917
00:44:43,800 --> 00:44:46,359
Speaker 5: through my head. One is, it would break my heart

918
00:44:46,400 --> 00:44:48,239
Speaker 5: if you two split up. If you did, I think

919
00:44:48,239 --> 00:44:52,839
Speaker 5: Mike should get spousal support. What I do, I think

920
00:44:52,920 --> 00:44:56,000
Speaker 5: that whichever spouse makes more should help out the other

921
00:44:56,040 --> 00:44:57,400
Speaker 5: one in that situation.

922
00:44:57,000 --> 00:44:59,799
Speaker 2: For how long I think it does? For how long I.

923
00:45:00,120 --> 00:45:02,759
Speaker 8: He does enough for how uh well, I don't know.

924
00:45:03,000 --> 00:45:04,719
Speaker 2: What I would do is I would just give him

925
00:45:04,719 --> 00:45:06,440
Speaker 2: an amount and say you need to take it or

926
00:45:06,520 --> 00:45:11,360
Speaker 2: leave it because I can't I it. I feel like,

927
00:45:12,680 --> 00:45:16,280
Speaker 2: I mean, just like Kelly's wealth was established before her marriage. Okay,

928
00:45:17,520 --> 00:45:19,760
Speaker 2: I'm sure she made a ton while they were married,

929
00:45:20,280 --> 00:45:24,480
Speaker 2: for sure, but she was Kelly Clarkston like she has

930
00:45:25,160 --> 00:45:33,279
Speaker 2: what she's Kelly clark Clarkson, Kelly Clarkson, Yeah, yeah, yeah,

931
00:45:33,400 --> 00:45:37,040
Speaker 2: she like she she is who she is and so

932
00:45:37,400 --> 00:45:41,360
Speaker 2: and I just don't think like it literally makes me

933
00:45:41,480 --> 00:45:45,160
Speaker 2: sick to think that I would that he again would

934
00:45:45,239 --> 00:45:47,719
Speaker 2: just be sitting on the sidelines, just getting a check

935
00:45:48,880 --> 00:45:51,160
Speaker 2: and not working. That's not okay with me.

936
00:45:51,640 --> 00:45:52,200
Speaker 8: Game again.

937
00:45:52,560 --> 00:45:55,080
Speaker 6: But the example you gave earlier about the wife quitting

938
00:45:55,120 --> 00:45:57,840
Speaker 6: her career to stay home with the kids. There's plenty

939
00:45:57,880 --> 00:46:01,560
Speaker 6: of divorces where the wife has a nanny and sits

940
00:46:01,560 --> 00:46:03,680
Speaker 6: on the couch all day and they get a divorce

941
00:46:03,800 --> 00:46:06,400
Speaker 6: and she takes the rich husband for a ton of money,

942
00:46:06,440 --> 00:46:10,879
Speaker 6: and the reaction from women is get it girl, yeah right.

943
00:46:11,640 --> 00:46:12,399
Speaker 3: Double edged sword.

944
00:46:13,280 --> 00:46:16,160
Speaker 2: That No, it's not, because that's the agreement that you

945
00:46:16,200 --> 00:46:19,000
Speaker 2: have to have with your spouse. It's if you're if

946
00:46:19,000 --> 00:46:21,239
Speaker 2: you're a state at home mom, you don't get a

947
00:46:21,360 --> 00:46:24,319
Speaker 2: nanny like that is your job. Your job is to

948
00:46:24,360 --> 00:46:26,520
Speaker 2: be a stay at home mom and do the thing.

949
00:46:26,920 --> 00:46:27,640
Speaker 8: Family is different.

950
00:46:27,680 --> 00:46:29,520
Speaker 7: I mean some it is and some it isn't, and

951
00:46:29,600 --> 00:46:31,960
Speaker 7: it depends on the situation. I think that whoever makes

952
00:46:31,960 --> 00:46:33,920
Speaker 7: the most should help out the other one to put

953
00:46:34,000 --> 00:46:36,960
Speaker 7: no matter what how involved they were in the how

954
00:46:37,080 --> 00:46:38,440
Speaker 7: homemaking or child.

955
00:46:38,320 --> 00:46:42,879
Speaker 3: Rearing, because then if ten years down the road, it's like, no,

956
00:46:43,200 --> 00:46:46,360
Speaker 3: this whole time it was my money, even though my

957
00:46:46,480 --> 00:46:49,239
Speaker 3: money was paying for our stuff, Like you could just

958
00:46:49,320 --> 00:46:50,960
Speaker 3: take the rug from out from under them at any

959
00:46:50,960 --> 00:46:51,520
Speaker 3: point in time.

960
00:46:52,800 --> 00:46:55,960
Speaker 2: I think if you go into the marriage you should have.

961
00:46:56,719 --> 00:46:59,759
Speaker 2: It should be your money, their money, and that's what

962
00:46:59,840 --> 00:47:04,279
Speaker 2: you leave with. Because especially in this kind of situation

963
00:47:04,520 --> 00:47:08,920
Speaker 2: where they both have money, he should take his money,

964
00:47:09,160 --> 00:47:10,960
Speaker 2: she should take her money. And I feel like he's

965
00:47:11,000 --> 00:47:13,239
Speaker 2: being spiteful because I have another friend that I hid,

966
00:47:13,560 --> 00:47:18,479
Speaker 2: you know, celebrity divorce. She takes her money, he takes

967
00:47:18,480 --> 00:47:22,239
Speaker 2: his money, and that's just what it is, because it's

968
00:47:22,280 --> 00:47:26,279
Speaker 2: spiteful to go after you know, and she could have

969
00:47:26,280 --> 00:47:28,640
Speaker 2: gone after him easily, could have gone after him for

970
00:47:28,680 --> 00:47:32,360
Speaker 2: a lot of money. Like what I'm genuinely trying to

971
00:47:32,360 --> 00:47:38,200
Speaker 2: say is if two people have money that came into

972
00:47:38,239 --> 00:47:41,359
Speaker 2: the marriage with money and have money, I think they

973
00:47:41,360 --> 00:47:44,399
Speaker 2: should just go their separate ways and say, all right,

974
00:47:44,840 --> 00:47:47,160
Speaker 2: you get this, you get that. But as with this

975
00:47:47,200 --> 00:47:50,400
Speaker 2: apostle support, it just seems to me. And again I

976
00:47:50,440 --> 00:47:52,960
Speaker 2: don't know their marriage. I don't know their relationship, but

977
00:47:53,000 --> 00:47:54,960
Speaker 2: I do know that they both make money. It just

978
00:47:55,000 --> 00:47:58,960
Speaker 2: seems to me that it's very spiteful, and that bothers

979
00:47:59,000 --> 00:48:02,120
Speaker 2: me because yes, I am a woman and I work

980
00:48:02,160 --> 00:48:03,840
Speaker 2: hard too, and I know how hard she's worked for

981
00:48:03,880 --> 00:48:07,720
Speaker 2: her stuff, and knowing that he from what I've seen

982
00:48:07,880 --> 00:48:10,799
Speaker 2: and know in the industry that he does have money.

983
00:48:10,880 --> 00:48:12,840
Speaker 2: It just sits very ugly to me.

984
00:48:13,160 --> 00:48:17,320
Speaker 3: Let me ask you this, Okay, if in our situation, Okay,

985
00:48:17,680 --> 00:48:19,640
Speaker 3: if say I was still playing football and I was

986
00:48:19,680 --> 00:48:22,879
Speaker 3: making the money that I was making, and the same

987
00:48:22,960 --> 00:48:28,520
Speaker 3: things happened in our relationship and we got divorced, would

988
00:48:28,600 --> 00:48:29,400
Speaker 3: you seek.

989
00:48:31,120 --> 00:48:34,600
Speaker 2: Financials If I wasn't, would I be doing what I'm

990
00:48:34,640 --> 00:48:35,080
Speaker 2: doing now?

991
00:48:36,560 --> 00:48:39,720
Speaker 3: Just then if five years ago, five.

992
00:48:39,640 --> 00:48:42,799
Speaker 2: Years ago, here's here's my thing, I would ask for

993
00:48:42,880 --> 00:48:47,760
Speaker 2: child support because obviously that's that's different how child support

994
00:48:47,880 --> 00:48:49,680
Speaker 2: Because you're a father, you should pay for child support

995
00:48:49,920 --> 00:48:51,600
Speaker 2: if the mom takes care of the kids. I'm not

996
00:48:51,640 --> 00:48:54,560
Speaker 2: asking for spousal support. I would never. I don't want

997
00:48:54,600 --> 00:48:57,759
Speaker 2: your money. I'm the kind I want. I've worked my

998
00:48:57,760 --> 00:49:00,839
Speaker 2: butt off for. I don't want your money. I want

999
00:49:00,880 --> 00:49:04,880
Speaker 2: my money and I and I need that. But child

1000
00:49:04,920 --> 00:49:07,239
Speaker 2: supports different. Everybody has to pay child support. If I

1001
00:49:07,239 --> 00:49:10,480
Speaker 2: would have to probably pay essentially child support to you.

1002
00:49:10,520 --> 00:49:13,160
Speaker 2: But the spousal support, when two people have money and

1003
00:49:13,239 --> 00:49:16,400
Speaker 2: someone goes after it just seems very spiteful. Now again,

1004
00:49:16,520 --> 00:49:19,440
Speaker 2: if it's a stay at home mom and you know,

1005
00:49:19,560 --> 00:49:22,200
Speaker 2: or stay at home dad and that was their agreement

1006
00:49:22,239 --> 00:49:24,959
Speaker 2: that they don't work, then I don't. Then of course

1007
00:49:25,000 --> 00:49:28,279
Speaker 2: they should. They should get support because that's been there,

1008
00:49:29,680 --> 00:49:32,239
Speaker 2: that's their thing, that's there. They they're the ones that

1009
00:49:32,280 --> 00:49:35,440
Speaker 2: held the family together. They should absolutely be compensated for

1010
00:49:35,480 --> 00:49:37,200
Speaker 2: the fact that they couldn't go out and get a job.

1011
00:49:37,320 --> 00:49:39,000
Speaker 3: All right, Mark, what's your question? I want to hear

1012
00:49:39,040 --> 00:49:39,319
Speaker 3: that well.

1013
00:49:39,360 --> 00:49:42,640
Speaker 5: And also also so just to clarify, you have no

1014
00:49:42,719 --> 00:49:45,360
Speaker 5: problem with Brandon getting child support from Kelly.

1015
00:49:45,920 --> 00:49:49,520
Speaker 2: No, because he'll still need you know, because that is

1016
00:49:49,600 --> 00:49:52,239
Speaker 2: just in the court of law. I think where that

1017
00:49:52,400 --> 00:49:54,799
Speaker 2: is the child, that money is for the child. Now

1018
00:49:54,840 --> 00:49:57,680
Speaker 2: if he goes and uses it elsewhere, I don't know

1019
00:49:57,680 --> 00:50:01,240
Speaker 2: how that works, but I I I think that every

1020
00:50:01,360 --> 00:50:06,600
Speaker 2: if you get divorced, people should pay child support if

1021
00:50:06,640 --> 00:50:10,240
Speaker 2: you're But again, here's the thing. She's now the primary person,

1022
00:50:10,719 --> 00:50:12,920
Speaker 2: so I don't think she'll have to pay child support.

1023
00:50:12,960 --> 00:50:15,200
Speaker 2: So I don't know how it works. I really don't

1024
00:50:15,239 --> 00:50:18,920
Speaker 2: know like that world too much, but I think absolutely

1025
00:50:19,000 --> 00:50:20,960
Speaker 2: child support is something you should always pay.

1026
00:50:22,920 --> 00:50:25,480
Speaker 5: I think the other element of this and the other

1027
00:50:25,520 --> 00:50:28,360
Speaker 5: reason people are really upset with Brandon is and again

1028
00:50:28,440 --> 00:50:30,680
Speaker 5: we don't know. There does seem to be a general

1029
00:50:30,760 --> 00:50:34,160
Speaker 5: perception that he shoulders most of the blame for the

1030
00:50:34,239 --> 00:50:37,200
Speaker 5: end of that marriage, right.

1031
00:50:37,239 --> 00:50:39,160
Speaker 8: Yes, that seems to be the case. It seems to be.

1032
00:50:39,160 --> 00:50:41,680
Speaker 5: What I'm seeing on social media is people say it's

1033
00:50:41,719 --> 00:50:44,320
Speaker 5: his fault and now he's asking for all this money.

1034
00:50:44,360 --> 00:50:46,480
Speaker 8: So I get that element of it as well.

1035
00:50:46,800 --> 00:50:49,200
Speaker 5: Here's my question for you too, which I think everybody

1036
00:50:49,239 --> 00:50:52,399
Speaker 5: listening now is thinking after this conversation this past hour.

1037
00:50:52,960 --> 00:50:54,640
Speaker 8: Do you two have a pre nup?

1038
00:50:56,120 --> 00:50:56,200
Speaker 4: No?

1039
00:50:58,320 --> 00:51:01,680
Speaker 2: What we have as a post nup. So when we

1040
00:51:01,760 --> 00:51:07,080
Speaker 2: went into our marriage, my business managers in the very

1041
00:51:07,120 --> 00:51:09,480
Speaker 2: beginning in management, said you need to get a prenup

1042
00:51:09,520 --> 00:51:11,720
Speaker 2: and I said, no, I do not want a prenup.

1043
00:51:12,400 --> 00:51:14,520
Speaker 2: I don't want it to be like that. This is

1044
00:51:14,760 --> 00:51:20,160
Speaker 2: us together. And when he went to rehab for the

1045
00:51:20,200 --> 00:51:23,560
Speaker 2: sex addiction stuff, I sent him a post up and said,

1046
00:51:23,560 --> 00:51:31,319
Speaker 2: you will sign this or I'm out, like because I don't. Yeah, So, yes,

1047
00:51:31,400 --> 00:51:32,879
Speaker 2: we technically have a post up.

1048
00:51:35,280 --> 00:51:41,360
Speaker 3: So yeah, which again I even you said it doesn't

1049
00:51:41,440 --> 00:51:45,560
Speaker 3: who knows how much weight it holds. But we're not

1050
00:51:45,640 --> 00:51:48,440
Speaker 3: planning it on a crossing any of those paths.

1051
00:51:50,320 --> 00:51:52,239
Speaker 8: Right, and you understood why she wanted that.

1052
00:51:52,800 --> 00:51:56,160
Speaker 3: Yeah, I mean that in that absolutely. In that moment too,

1053
00:51:56,239 --> 00:51:58,279
Speaker 3: I was willing to do anything, and so signing a

1054
00:51:58,280 --> 00:52:02,319
Speaker 3: piece of paper was nothing for me. Well, I was like, yeah,

1055
00:52:02,360 --> 00:52:04,239
Speaker 3: I don't give it because I'm not going to put

1056
00:52:04,280 --> 00:52:05,719
Speaker 3: ourselves in this kind of situation.

1057
00:52:06,760 --> 00:52:08,879
Speaker 2: You know where I think, Mark I go and where

1058
00:52:08,920 --> 00:52:15,440
Speaker 2: it gets No, how do I say this? Like, I

1059
00:52:15,520 --> 00:52:20,920
Speaker 2: feel like if we were to end the marriage, most

1060
00:52:21,000 --> 00:52:26,200
Speaker 2: likely would be because of something from the past had

1061
00:52:26,200 --> 00:52:28,280
Speaker 2: come back and a pattern was repeated.

1062
00:52:28,680 --> 00:52:31,120
Speaker 3: Most likely aka most likely be Mike's fault.

1063
00:52:34,120 --> 00:52:36,200
Speaker 2: I'm not trying to you.

1064
00:52:36,120 --> 00:52:37,640
Speaker 3: Said that in the kindest of ways.

1065
00:52:38,080 --> 00:52:41,080
Speaker 2: He was trying to be like, but I mean, you know,

1066
00:52:41,600 --> 00:52:46,080
Speaker 2: you know, no no Incredibles reference. It's such a good

1067
00:52:46,400 --> 00:52:49,879
Speaker 2: part in that movie. I think it would be really

1068
00:52:49,960 --> 00:52:54,200
Speaker 2: hard for me to then pay him spousal support because

1069
00:52:54,200 --> 00:52:57,680
Speaker 2: I'm like, I didn't want this, and now I'm paying

1070
00:52:57,719 --> 00:53:02,560
Speaker 2: you for your mistakes like it. That's what I think

1071
00:53:03,000 --> 00:53:06,719
Speaker 2: is where my anger comes from, because I do love you, sweetheart,

1072
00:53:06,760 --> 00:53:09,080
Speaker 2: but you are a very spiteful, mean person at times,

1073
00:53:09,680 --> 00:53:13,080
Speaker 2: and I feel like it would you would absolutely do

1074
00:53:13,160 --> 00:53:14,080
Speaker 2: what Brainon's doing.

1075
00:53:14,560 --> 00:53:17,320
Speaker 3: I'm sorry you feel that way. I told you I

1076
00:53:17,320 --> 00:53:18,560
Speaker 3: would do it out of spite not.

1077
00:53:18,640 --> 00:53:21,200
Speaker 2: To Okay, we have it on record now that why

1078
00:53:21,200 --> 00:53:26,960
Speaker 2: I don't. We can and I know that I can

1079
00:53:27,000 --> 00:53:29,799
Speaker 2: be too, you know at times we can both be mean,

1080
00:53:31,680 --> 00:53:35,680
Speaker 2: you know, and I just I think that's what bothers

1081
00:53:35,680 --> 00:53:38,760
Speaker 2: me because it's like, I don't I don't want a divorce.

1082
00:53:38,840 --> 00:53:41,520
Speaker 2: I don't want to do any of those things. You know.

1083
00:53:44,360 --> 00:53:47,279
Speaker 2: But you know, but you know what if it's something

1084
00:53:47,280 --> 00:53:50,640
Speaker 2: were to happen and then you were to come climbing

1085
00:53:50,719 --> 00:53:55,200
Speaker 2: up the money tree, I'd be like, Man, I didn't

1086
00:53:55,200 --> 00:53:58,120
Speaker 2: want any of this. I don't want separate holidays. That's

1087
00:53:58,120 --> 00:54:03,319
Speaker 2: why I stayed married. That literally, Mark, that was the

1088
00:54:03,400 --> 00:54:06,080
Speaker 2: reason why I stayed in the very beginning was because

1089
00:54:06,080 --> 00:54:09,000
Speaker 2: I'm like, because of his decisions, now I don't get

1090
00:54:09,000 --> 00:54:12,440
Speaker 2: to be with my kids on Christmas morning or create No,

1091
00:54:12,600 --> 00:54:16,240
Speaker 2: how dare you? Like I was out of spite, I stayed.

1092
00:54:17,920 --> 00:54:20,399
Speaker 3: But you know what I mean, though I know it's

1093
00:54:20,400 --> 00:54:22,000
Speaker 3: not like the same face from like five.

1094
00:54:22,280 --> 00:54:24,200
Speaker 2: Sorry, I'm sorry, it's just like but it's like, how

1095
00:54:24,239 --> 00:54:27,719
Speaker 2: dare you don't get to take that from me? That like,

1096
00:54:27,880 --> 00:54:32,120
Speaker 2: how like no, because of your decisions? I mean, I

1097
00:54:32,120 --> 00:54:34,399
Speaker 2: could see how someone would get so angry about that.

1098
00:54:34,960 --> 00:54:36,680
Speaker 5: I agree, it doesn't seem like the best reason to

1099
00:54:36,719 --> 00:54:39,080
Speaker 5: stand in relationship, but I agree one hundred percent there's

1100
00:54:39,120 --> 00:54:43,000
Speaker 5: nothing there's no scenario that would make that the desired

1101
00:54:43,040 --> 00:54:44,879
Speaker 5: outcome to be sharing holidays like.

1102
00:54:44,800 --> 00:54:48,080
Speaker 2: That, I know, and it's just, you know, the messy

1103
00:54:48,200 --> 00:54:51,560
Speaker 2: like divorce is just so messy, and I hate it

1104
00:54:51,560 --> 00:54:53,279
Speaker 2: for Kelly, and I hate it for Brandon again because

1105
00:54:53,280 --> 00:54:55,200
Speaker 2: I don't know their situation. So I'm sorry if we

1106
00:54:55,280 --> 00:54:58,000
Speaker 2: even stepped in it. But I think it was more

1107
00:54:58,080 --> 00:54:58,640
Speaker 2: just to kind.

1108
00:54:58,520 --> 00:55:00,600
Speaker 3: Of just the principle is what we're talkingalking about. We're

1109
00:55:00,600 --> 00:55:03,239
Speaker 3: not even really talking about specifically. Then it's just that

1110
00:55:03,280 --> 00:55:05,240
Speaker 3: whole principle of the money aspect.

1111
00:55:05,719 --> 00:55:08,200
Speaker 2: But it did just I'm glad. I'm not the only person.

1112
00:55:08,200 --> 00:55:10,799
Speaker 2: I didn't know if it left other people a little angry,

1113
00:55:11,000 --> 00:55:13,239
Speaker 2: so other people have been heightened about it.

1114
00:55:13,239 --> 00:55:15,480
Speaker 8: Oh definitely. I mean, plus, she's America's sweetheart.

1115
00:55:15,520 --> 00:55:17,839
Speaker 5: I mean, anything bad happen with the Kelly Clarkson, everyone

1116
00:55:17,880 --> 00:55:19,200
Speaker 5: feels bad about it because.

1117
00:55:18,960 --> 00:55:21,000
Speaker 8: She couldn't be the nice She's the nicest person around.

1118
00:55:21,040 --> 00:55:21,960
Speaker 8: So I get it.

1119
00:55:21,960 --> 00:55:24,080
Speaker 5: I get where people are coming from, especially under the

1120
00:55:24,120 --> 00:55:25,799
Speaker 5: circumstances that are rumored.

1121
00:55:25,960 --> 00:55:30,719
Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, I mean, I definitely think it's a spiteful move.

1122
00:55:31,400 --> 00:55:35,760
Speaker 3: I mean, I'm not defending it at all, but yeah,

1123
00:55:36,280 --> 00:55:37,480
Speaker 3: there's other scenarios too.

1124
00:55:37,840 --> 00:55:38,920
Speaker 5: Well.

1125
00:55:39,120 --> 00:55:43,480
Speaker 2: Here's to hopefully not divorce in twenty twenty one for

1126
00:55:43,520 --> 00:55:46,040
Speaker 2: everyone listening, because we want you guys to here we go,

1127
00:55:46,200 --> 00:55:47,440
Speaker 2: drum roll, please fight the.

1128
00:55:47,400 --> 00:55:51,200
Speaker 3: Good fight, perfect perfect plug.

1129
00:55:52,560 --> 00:55:56,400
Speaker 2: We love you, guys. Thanks for the great Yeah, it

1130
00:55:56,440 --> 00:56:00,600
Speaker 2: was fun. I'm excited for I'm excited for Christmas, you are.

1131
00:56:01,120 --> 00:56:02,600
Speaker 2: What Mike and I have been doing is we've been

1132
00:56:02,600 --> 00:56:06,880
Speaker 2: watching a Christmas movie every Friday. So on Christmas is

1133
00:56:07,000 --> 00:56:09,920
Speaker 2: obviously Friday. So every Friday this month, sit down with

1134
00:56:09,960 --> 00:56:13,439
Speaker 2: your honey and watch a Christmas movie. Al Right, bye, guys.

1135
00:56:13,560 --> 00:56:13,960
Speaker 3: See yeah,