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Speaker 1: Hey, grand your My name is Andrew. I'm from Ontario, Canada.

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Speaker 1: I'm a senior in high school. I have a ton

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Speaker 1: of questions I'd like to ask, but my number one

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Speaker 1: is what is the number one life advice you'd give

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Speaker 1: to someone who has not found themselves yet or is

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Speaker 1: in the process of doing so. Ye ye, Andrew is

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Speaker 1: asking the question, Berniclcoat. Here we go on the podcast,

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Speaker 1: Here we Go. You have become a fan favorite, no doubt.

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Speaker 1: I cannot believe that. Thank you, guys, I really just

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Speaker 1: don't understand why. I'll tell you why I thank you.

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Speaker 1: Besides the fact that you're just an awesome dude. I

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Speaker 1: think people latch on to when you're a guest on

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Speaker 1: this show. I think people latch onto it because they

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Speaker 1: could tell that me and you have a long history

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Speaker 1: of friendship and trust. And after we roll that the

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Speaker 1: audio and the camera here in this room, we end

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Speaker 1: up forgetting that it's even on and we're just talking.

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Speaker 1: I say this all the time, like we're just sitting

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Speaker 1: around a campfire, cracked a few beers and there's a

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Speaker 1: third person in a third chair, which is this email.

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Speaker 1: I read the question and me and you talk through it.

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Speaker 1: Like we're three friends, right, it's hard. Cool. That sounds awesome,

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Speaker 1: but it's hard to do unless you actually have a

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Speaker 1: twenty year friendship like me and you do. I think

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Speaker 1: that's why they love you. Yeah, So, if anyone out

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Speaker 1: there has a question, you email Grangersmith Podcast at gmail

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Speaker 1: dot com. I collect these daily. I kind of put

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Speaker 1: them into different categories depending on your question, but it

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Speaker 1: could literally be about anything. Me and Bernie have answered

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Speaker 1: just about every kind of question you could ask, whether

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Speaker 1: it's lighthearted or career based or anything. Throw us something

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Speaker 1: difficulty because these have been pretty easy so far. I'm

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Speaker 1: just kidding, Okay, accept that that was the joke. They

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Speaker 1: have not been easy. They're never easy. And as I

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Speaker 1: always say, you know, whenever I get to come on

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Speaker 1: here with Griz, like we're just giving our perspective and

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Speaker 1: our experience on some of the things that we're hearing.

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Speaker 1: But we always are going to push you to surround

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Speaker 1: yourself with the community that you can process these things

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Speaker 1: with and always go back to God's word because it'll

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Speaker 1: never it'll never fail you will never lead you astray.

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Speaker 1: So those two things, God's Word, community, and then you know,

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Speaker 1: hopefully something we can say will kind of encourage you

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Speaker 1: or inspire you to push into those things a little more. So.

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Speaker 1: It's really heavy responsibility, but also so fulfilling for us

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Speaker 1: knowing that right now, at the beginning of a new podcast,

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Speaker 1: it's Monday morning, somebody's listening right now somewhere that either

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Speaker 1: hasn't heard this or maybe they've heard a few times,

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Speaker 1: and they have a question and right now, you know,

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Speaker 1: they they listen to something through here and they pull

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Speaker 1: out their phone and they start a new email Granger

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Speaker 1: Smith podcast at gmail dot com. Hey Granger, I have

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Speaker 1: a question, and there it is. And that's a massive

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Speaker 1: responsibility that I don't look at as a burden. I

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Speaker 1: look at it as a huge privilegeutely to be able

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Speaker 1: to share in your question that you've been stewing over

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Speaker 1: for maybe years, and to know that right now today

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Speaker 1: in this room, as we hit record on this podcast,

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Speaker 1: a new one is being born. That's so cool. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: And that one day we will have a live podcast

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Speaker 1: boom with live audience boom and get to have them

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Speaker 1: sit in the chair with us boom and you know,

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Speaker 1: chop these things up. That would be really fun. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: it would be so much easier too. Because we could

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Speaker 1: ask second and third questions. Yeah, yeah, yeah, Well let's

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Speaker 1: start with an easy one. Here is this, says Hey Granger.

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Speaker 1: I'm Kevin from far Northern California AKAA, state of Jefferson.

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Speaker 1: It's funny that he has to say far northern because

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Speaker 1: he's trying to separate him. So I get I get

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Speaker 1: what you're doing there. We know who you are. I

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Speaker 1: love California, man. I love you guys, especially the group

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Speaker 1: of California that is the silent majority. I feel you,

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Speaker 1: I hear you. I love you guys. He says, what

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Speaker 1: is the ring you wear on your right hand during

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Speaker 1: your podcast? Thank you? We' wearing right now? Yeah, this

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Speaker 1: is an Aggie ring. This is Texas A and M,

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Speaker 1: where I went to school. For some reason, it's an

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Speaker 1: over one hundred year old tradition. We just like our

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Speaker 1: class rings at Texas A and M. It kind of

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Speaker 1: becomes a statement after you get out of school and

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Speaker 1: you enter the real world. You could spot it far off.

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Speaker 1: If you're an agg you could spot. Even if you're

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Speaker 1: not anag you could go, oh, what class are you?

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Speaker 1: So it's kind of like a cult, right, Yeah, don't

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Speaker 1: you have to earn the ring, like not just graduate,

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Speaker 1: but you have to like dunk the ring. Yeah, can

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Speaker 1: we talk about it. You have to dunk it. So

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Speaker 1: you earn your ring at tex A and M through

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Speaker 1: I believe it's ninety hours of class credit and then

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Speaker 1: you have to You don't have to, but most everyone

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Speaker 1: does what they call a ring dunk, where you take

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Speaker 1: your ring and you you go most likely to a

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Speaker 1: place called the Dixie Chicken, which is a bar and

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Speaker 1: college station, and you get a picture of beer, hopefully

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Speaker 1: light beer, and you drop your ring in the bottom

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Speaker 1: of the picture and you have to chug the picture

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Speaker 1: until you get to the ring at the bottom and

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Speaker 1: everyone times you. Who yeah, I don't remember my time.

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Speaker 1: I don't remember. It was a long time ago. Is

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Speaker 1: the point to just get to the bottom and then

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Speaker 1: you got your ring and you earned it? Kind of okay,

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Speaker 1: right word? But it's like, did they do they put

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Speaker 1: like the best times up on the wall that yeah,

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Speaker 1: they do that kind of stuff, and most of the

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Speaker 1: time people throw up Okay the girls I did. I

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Speaker 1: did not. I wasn't trying to break a world record though, either.

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Speaker 1: Did you write your name and your time on the way,

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Speaker 1: I didn't do that. You didn't, okay, but a lot

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Speaker 1: of people do, a lot of people take it more

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Speaker 1: serious than me. But it is a funny. A and

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Speaker 1: M has their awesome traditions much like that. But you

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Speaker 1: got you got you guys definitely. Uh, y'all get some

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Speaker 1: traditions going and you don't let them go, you like

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Speaker 1: hold fast to them. Do you have a piece of

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Speaker 1: jewelry that you wear consistently over the years, just my

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Speaker 1: wedding ring, your wedding ring? You wear a still a

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Speaker 1: metal wedding ring too? I do. Yeah. Most people have

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Speaker 1: gone to the rubber ones like I have. Yeah, I'm

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Speaker 1: shocked that I haven't lost this one as much kind

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Speaker 1: of adventuring as we've done. I'm not a big like

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Speaker 1: I'm pretty active, and I know a lot of active

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Speaker 1: folks do that, but I don't. I haven't found myself

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Speaker 1: doing I don't like throw around a lot of big weights.

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Speaker 1: So I know a lot of guys that do that

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Speaker 1: get the ververs cause it starts to hurt. But yeah,

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Speaker 1: I still have this one that my wife gave me

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Speaker 1: sixteen years ago. What is that made out of? I

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Speaker 1: think it's just sterling silver and says the one I

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Speaker 1: adore on the inside. Still got the original. That's so cool.

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Speaker 1: So my story is my original wedding ring we got.

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Speaker 1: I cannot remember the metal, but it was cheaper than silver.

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Speaker 1: It wasn't platinum, but it was another one of those

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Speaker 1: kinds of high end that's cheaper than gold and silver.

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Speaker 1: And I remember thinking it was so cool. And one

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Speaker 1: day I was washing my hands and I took my

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Speaker 1: hands out of the sink and it slipped off my

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Speaker 1: finger and it hit the floor. It hit the tile,

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Speaker 1: and it disintegrated. It just blew into a thousand pieces.

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Speaker 1: And apparently that metal is like so hard and so

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Speaker 1: indestructible except on tile. Whatever that means. Somebody listening knows

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Speaker 1: what I mean. And I can't explain why, but something

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Speaker 1: about when it makes contact with a tile floor, it

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Speaker 1: will destroy it. So then I got a James Avery

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Speaker 1: silver ring after that and lost it because I'm an idiot,

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Speaker 1: and it happens, and then I luckily, and luckily, Amber

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Speaker 1: has been so cool about the three rings that I've had,

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Speaker 1: and she doesn't worry about it. So now I wear

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Speaker 1: this rubber one, which I do not care. In fact,

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Speaker 1: I had one a couple weeks ago that got a

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Speaker 1: little in it and just put another one on. So

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Speaker 1: it doesn't mean anything to me, but it still symbolizes, yeah,

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Speaker 1: that I'm married to Amber. Have you guys considered doing

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Speaker 1: the ring tattoos. We haven't considered it, but I wouldn't not. Yeah.

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Speaker 1: So Leslie and I just celebrated our sixteen year anniversary

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Speaker 1: and I was like, we had some plans that day

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Speaker 1: that didn't include it raining, and it rained all day

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Speaker 1: so we kind of had some free time. I was like, babe,

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Speaker 1: let's just go get tattoos if you know her, like

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Speaker 1: she is not in so like just going to get

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Speaker 1: tattoos on a whim. But she was like, yeah, we

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Speaker 1: can get you know, the ring tattoos. And I was like,

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Speaker 1: for real. She was like, I don't know, you know,

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Speaker 1: like kind of backed up on it, but I don't know.

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Speaker 1: I know that's the same people to right, huh, Okay,

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Speaker 1: it could be cool. Yeah, I know a lot of

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Speaker 1: people do it and then they don't even wear a

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Speaker 1: ring because it's just tattooed on them. Yeah, some people

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Speaker 1: are weird. They fill claustrophobic with rings. Yeah, so I

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Speaker 1: get it. Yeah, Like I'm just I actually when my

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Speaker 1: dad passed away. I kept his wedding ring and it

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Speaker 1: fits me. So if I'm doing, like, if I'm dressing up,

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Speaker 1: you wear that one. It's gold and I put that

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Speaker 1: on nice, so I don't have to wear a rubber

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Speaker 1: one with if the rare occasion is that I actually

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Speaker 1: have to dress up, Yeah, that's cool. So here's here's

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Speaker 1: another one. This is let me see how about this one.

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Speaker 1: I'm still taking. I'm kind of ramping this up. Says Hey, Granger.

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Speaker 1: My name is Grace, I'm fourteen. A couple of weeks

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Speaker 1: ago I had a birthday and you and never did

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Speaker 1: a cameo video, So thank you so much for that awesome,

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Speaker 1: great cool. I love cameo. It says. We watch this

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Speaker 1: Smiths all the time in my house, my sister Emmy

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Speaker 1: and my mom Crystal, and I love your music. Thank

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Speaker 1: you guys, he said, your music. She said, your music

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Speaker 1: has been one of the many things that's impact in

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Speaker 1: my life. I was inspired to start learning to play

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Speaker 1: the guitar and try to pursue a music career. What

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Speaker 1: are some what's some advice you could give to someone

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Speaker 1: very very early on in their music journey. And that's

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Speaker 1: a great question. Me and you've had this kind of

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Speaker 1: question before, And fourteen is actually the age that I

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Speaker 1: started playing guitar, So Grace, you're right on que with me.

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Speaker 1: So I would start with this, I would start getting better,

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Speaker 1: better at that guitar, which only takes practice. Don't only

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Speaker 1: read chord charts and music tabs. Don't just do that

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Speaker 1: at some point early on and you're learning, break away

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Speaker 1: from the tabs and just start what we'd say just jamming.

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Speaker 1: Just start using three or four chords that you know

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Speaker 1: from other songs and mix them up and put them

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Speaker 1: in different orders and different rhythms, and strum around on

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Speaker 1: and pick around on it. And when you start doing that,

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Speaker 1: you're then not emulating your creating and I think you

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Speaker 1: learn faster through the creative part of guitar. And then

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Speaker 1: really say that you're a singer. But then you could

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Speaker 1: start singing along with songs on the radio while you're playing.

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Speaker 1: You're going to grow so fast and in your knowledge

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Speaker 1: of music when you start this consistently every day. And

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Speaker 1: then the third step I would say is start recording yourself.

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Speaker 1: You don't have to get anything expensive. You could use

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Speaker 1: your phone or any kind of digital recording, which almost

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Speaker 1: Every cell phone has an app for that, and you

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Speaker 1: just hit record, play a song, sing it, and then

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Speaker 1: listen to it over and over. Find the spots that

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Speaker 1: you like what you do, find the spots that you

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Speaker 1: don't like what you do, and you'll grow quickly with that.

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Speaker 1: What do you say, Burns, Yeah, No, I think that's good.

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Speaker 1: You gotta hone your craft. You gotta like push into it. Practice.

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Speaker 1: It's gonna be hard, but push into it get really good.

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Speaker 1: I think also I started. I remember I started playing

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Speaker 1: on I start playing on a classical guitar, but then

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Speaker 1: I went to an acoustic guitar that was called an

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Speaker 1: arbor Is by a company called Arbor, which I think

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Speaker 1: is like maybe one of the cheapest guitars you can get,

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Speaker 1: at least the one that I had was. Man, I

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Speaker 1: remember in Nashville picking up your black Takamini. You remember

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Speaker 1: that guitar, and you I actually sold it at one

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Speaker 1: time when I needed money. I remember picking that guitar

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Speaker 1: up in Nashville and playing it and being like, man, this,

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Speaker 1: I'm so much better on this guitar than I have

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Speaker 1: on mind. So I think there's a certain point where

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Speaker 1: you don't want to go out and just blow a

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Speaker 1: bunch of money on a guitar that's way above what

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Speaker 1: you need. But make sure you got the right instrument

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Speaker 1: that fits you. Because I was playing this guitar and

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Speaker 1: like the guitar just wasn't what I needed. I picked

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Speaker 1: up a guitar that was just a step better and

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Speaker 1: realized like, wow, this actually sounds better, which made me

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Speaker 1: want to play more. So I sold that other guitar

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Speaker 1: and got a newer one. So I would just suggest

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Speaker 1: that too. Yeah, when that time's right. It's kind of

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Speaker 1: like voggers when you're getting into vlogging or making videos.

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Speaker 1: At the right time, you got to get a better camera,

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Speaker 1: but at the beginning it's good to have the cheap one.

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Speaker 1: Same with guitars, so you'll know when the right time is. Yep,

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Speaker 1: there's a question with the title called A Question for

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Speaker 1: You and Bernie. Okay, good, good opportunity. Here says Hey Granger.

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Speaker 1: My name is Lily. I'm from a small town just

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Speaker 1: north of Tampa, Florida. I've written to the podcast before,

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Speaker 1: but this question is different. I have a friend that's

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Speaker 1: always starts an argument no matter what I say. She

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Speaker 1: claims that I always put the blame on her, and

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Speaker 1: I always it always gets heated about the little things,

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Speaker 1: which is one hundred percent wrong. I never put the

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Speaker 1: blame on her for anything. I have called her out

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Speaker 1: on things and when she's made me mad or frustrated,

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Speaker 1: but calling someone out for something that hurts you and

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Speaker 1: putting the blame on someone for that are completely different things.

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Speaker 1: I told her about that. I also don't get mad

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Speaker 1: about the lit things. Every time I tell myself that

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Speaker 1: I'm not going to be involved as I was, I

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Speaker 1: end up right back where I started. I feel like

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Speaker 1: I should step back and just not engage. What do

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Speaker 1: you do if you're in my situation? Well, that's a

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Speaker 1: tough one that I asked for for sure, because yeah,

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Speaker 1: relationships are so complicated. And again, without having you in

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Speaker 1: the third chair and be able to ask you some

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Speaker 1: follow up questions, how old is she? If she doesn't say, Lily,

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Speaker 1: I guarantee you everyone listening is going through this at

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Speaker 1: some level. And it's so much easier for me, Lily,

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Speaker 1: to read your question and help you through it that

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Speaker 1: it is for me when I'm in it giving myself

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Speaker 1: advice that probably works for anything in life. It's easier

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Speaker 1: for me to sit here, and I'll straight up tell

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Speaker 1: you I see problem. I see some big problems in

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Speaker 1: your email. Don't get mad at me and anyone that emails.

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Speaker 1: I'm just going to tell you as if we're sitting

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Speaker 1: around a campfire. I'm gonna tell you straight up, and

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Speaker 1: there's some there's some big problems. I know you see

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Speaker 1: them too. It says she claims. You're basically saying we

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Speaker 1: have an argument, and typically she starts it, and she

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Speaker 1: puts the blame on you. And then you turn around

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Speaker 1: in this email and say, which is one hundred percent wrong?

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Speaker 1: One hundred percent She's one hundred percent wrong, that's what

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Speaker 1: you're saying. And that's just impossible. There's always a little

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Speaker 1: truth to everything. So in order for this to get better,

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Speaker 1: that has to change. Right off the bat, you say,

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Speaker 1: I never put the blame on her for anything, and

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Speaker 1: yet you're blaming her in this email to me and Bernie, Yeah, right, yeah,

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Speaker 1: and using words like never and always yes. What are

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Speaker 1: those called explore to explotives? In Star Wars they say

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Speaker 1: a what do they say A Jedi never speaks in expletives? Right?

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Speaker 1: Because there's always a chance of something else. Sorry, Star

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Speaker 1: Wars reference. So from reading and you, I'm so glad

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Speaker 1: you asked us, and I'm thankful that you're trusting us

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Speaker 1: with something that's really bothering you. And it is clear

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Speaker 1: that you're going to have to give some on this

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Speaker 1: because you're holding your ground, you get your heels in

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Speaker 1: the dirt. You're not giving any ground back to her,

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Speaker 1: and that is clearly not working. You're saying, I feel

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Speaker 1: like I should just step back and not engage, which

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Speaker 1: I don't really think that that's necessary. You guys are

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Speaker 1: you guys are good friends, so you do want to engage,

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Speaker 1: But I think I think you gotta you got to

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Speaker 1: step back and while you're engaging, step back during the

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Speaker 1: engagement and just say what if you ever would say?

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Speaker 1: And there's nothing specific in here, but she claims that

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Speaker 1: I always put the blame on her. What if you

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Speaker 1: just step back and say, I'm so sorry for putting

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Speaker 1: the blame on you. What if you said that even

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Speaker 1: if you don't necessarily believe it. What if that's what

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Speaker 1: came out of your mouth instead of I don't ever

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Speaker 1: put the blame on you know you're wrong, You're one

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Speaker 1: hundred percent wrong. I don't put the blame on you

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Speaker 1: for anything. You call me out on these things. And

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Speaker 1: look what if you just said, I'm so sorry. I

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Speaker 1: want to work on this with you, because you're you

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Speaker 1: mean so much to me as a friend that I

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Speaker 1: truly want to work on getting better at blaming me

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Speaker 1: for things. Now, what happened. What's happening here in this

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Speaker 1: conversation is you are hurting your pride because your pride

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Speaker 1: says I'm right, I don't blame you for anything. And

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Speaker 1: so to step back and say, I'm so sorry, I

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Speaker 1: want to work on putting blame on you. You're crushing

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Speaker 1: your own pride inside. But that's okay, it's not a

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Speaker 1: bad thing. This is what saves relationships, is putting your

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Speaker 1: own pride aside that happens with anything. That's what separates

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Speaker 1: us from humans from dogs. Yep, I look at my dogs.

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Speaker 1: I have three dogs. They're all three great, loving creatures.

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Speaker 1: But when I feed them, Remy, the male, will steal

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Speaker 1: the food of the females every time. He'll steal their

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Speaker 1: food when they're not looking, or he'll push them out

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Speaker 1: of the way and he'll eat the food. And sometimes

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Speaker 1: I look at him and I'm like, Amber, look, this

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Speaker 1: is what separates us as humans. It's like he's the

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Speaker 1: sweetest dog, but he has nothing in his brain that

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Speaker 1: says share that's their food, that's not yours. His nut.

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Speaker 1: But we as humans, we do see that, and we

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Speaker 1: sometimes have to crush our pride a little bit. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: I know something else I want to go with, but

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Speaker 1: I want to let you speak, Yeah, Lily, to tell

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Speaker 1: you the truth. I'm a bit kind of mentally lost

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Speaker 1: in some of my own relationship situations very similar to this,

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Speaker 1: And I'm guessing that there's people out there that have

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Speaker 1: not just relatively similar, but very very specifically similar situations

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Speaker 1: to what you're dealing with now. And man, relationships are

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Speaker 1: just so so tough to navigate, especially when you get deep,

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Speaker 1: when you intend to love someone in a deep way.

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Speaker 1: And we also have to fight our own flesh that's

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Speaker 1: broken and has been hurt and has a tendency not

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Speaker 1: to trust, and all the things in First Corinthians thirteen

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Speaker 1: that it talks about what love is. I challenge you

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Speaker 1: to go back. I did this, so what I'm going

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Speaker 1: through personally took me back through First Corinthians thirteen and

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Speaker 1: just read the list of everything that love is. It's

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Speaker 1: kind it's patient. It doesn't envy, it doesn't boast, it's

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Speaker 1: not irritable or resentful, it does not insist in its

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Speaker 1: own way. I mean, there's just so many of you

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Speaker 1: get the love as patient. Love is kind. You've heard that.

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Speaker 1: But when you get into the middle part of that passage, like,

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Speaker 1: there's no way that you don't go back to your

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Speaker 1: friend and say, so, I have not loved you the

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Speaker 1: way that I should have, the way that I'm called

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Speaker 1: to love you. I have not done that. That's where

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Speaker 1: your email is showing and where I too, am guilty

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Speaker 1: of showing air arrogance. But it says love is not

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Speaker 1: arrogant like and so like we have to humble ourselves

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Speaker 1: and just go there's no butt. Well, I'm sorry, but

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Speaker 1: you start this or you it's like, no, hey, that's

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Speaker 1: not your responsibility. What you're responsible for. What I'm responsible for.

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Speaker 1: And the only thing I can control is the way

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Speaker 1: that I place myself in a servant role of love

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Speaker 1: towards the people that God has put in my path.

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Speaker 1: And whether that's a shallow or deep relationship. Man, it

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Speaker 1: is the hardest thing to navigate because, like Chris said,

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Speaker 1: we are fighting these you know, constantly fighting these things

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Speaker 1: within us. But I think that that is what I'm

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Speaker 1: struggling with and what I'm going through and trying to navigate. Okay,

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Speaker 1: at what point, and maybe Gris is a follow up

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Speaker 1: question for you, you know on behalf of Lily is like,

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Speaker 1: at what point? So I now gone through this? I

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Speaker 1: have gone to this person humbly. They have said something

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Speaker 1: I've done against them. I've I've like asked for forgiveness.

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Speaker 1: I've said, man, I'm sorry, I'm gonna try. I'm gonna

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Speaker 1: try to serve you and love you. I'm sorry I

385
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Speaker 1: haven't loved you the way I'm called to, and I

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Speaker 1: do love you. I want you to trust me. And

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Speaker 1: yet again they they come back that I have, you know,

388
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Speaker 1: like just they're carrying these things and they come back

389
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Speaker 1: with these accusations, And at what point is it like,

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Speaker 1: this isn't really about me, this is about you. How

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Speaker 1: do I love and serve that person? Right? So let's

392
00:23:41,800 --> 00:23:43,720
Speaker 1: try to do an experiment we haven't done on the

393
00:23:43,760 --> 00:23:46,159
Speaker 1: podcast before. Let's try to hack this out for Lily.

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Speaker 1: You you're gonna You're gonna tell me Burns, You're gonna

395
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Speaker 1: be the friend. And I'm gonna be Lily. I'm gonna

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Speaker 1: be what I think Lily should try. As an experiment,

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Speaker 1: You're gonna tell me just say, man, are you losing weight?

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00:24:02,720 --> 00:24:05,880
Speaker 1: That shirt looks you look really you look like you're

399
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Speaker 1: getting smaller, which would actually be because I try to

400
00:24:08,680 --> 00:24:10,440
Speaker 1: work out and I try to eat right, So that

401
00:24:10,480 --> 00:24:13,600
Speaker 1: would actually be something that would offend me to say that. Hey,

402
00:24:15,200 --> 00:24:19,840
Speaker 1: like we just saw each other, Okay, here we go, Hey, Gris,

403
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Speaker 1: are you losing weight? Man? Your shirt's a little thin,

404
00:24:22,800 --> 00:24:32,320
Speaker 1: and like, no, I'm the same weight. What if I

405
00:24:32,359 --> 00:24:35,320
Speaker 1: said this? You know, to be honest with you, man,

406
00:24:35,800 --> 00:24:37,639
Speaker 1: and this is not your fault. This is totally not

407
00:24:37,680 --> 00:24:41,880
Speaker 1: your fault. You're making an observation. But I've been struggling

408
00:24:41,920 --> 00:24:46,040
Speaker 1: lately with with you know, working out and trying to

409
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Speaker 1: eat right, and people have been saying that I look

410
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Speaker 1: like I'm losing weight, and it actually bothers me. Once again,

411
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Speaker 1: I'm not blaming you because you're just making an observation

412
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Speaker 1: and you're You're just that kind of person that says

413
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Speaker 1: what they think and I love that about you. Well, Grangeer,

414
00:24:59,720 --> 00:25:01,840
Speaker 1: I wasn't trying to be rude, like I feel like

415
00:25:01,880 --> 00:25:04,960
Speaker 1: you're starting something here, and I really was just trying

416
00:25:05,000 --> 00:25:07,639
Speaker 1: to say that you look No, absolutely not. That's actually

417
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Speaker 1: what I love about you and the reason we're really

418
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Speaker 1: good friends. I love the fact that you could just

419
00:25:12,359 --> 00:25:15,800
Speaker 1: call it like you see it, and that's why you're

420
00:25:15,960 --> 00:25:17,560
Speaker 1: that's why you have so many friends, that's why you

421
00:25:17,560 --> 00:25:20,000
Speaker 1: do good in life. And this that's totally on me.

422
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Speaker 1: I just I'm feeling a little insecure about looking small.

423
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Speaker 1: So when you said that, it kind of hurt me.

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Speaker 1: But I know that you didn't mean to you see,

425
00:25:29,160 --> 00:25:31,639
Speaker 1: kind of like I'm putting it back behind me in

426
00:25:31,680 --> 00:25:36,600
Speaker 1: the situation for Lily, and I'm not. I'm not saying, well,

427
00:25:36,600 --> 00:25:40,800
Speaker 1: that's rude. That really hurts my feelings. Bernie. Yeah, because

428
00:25:40,840 --> 00:25:43,320
Speaker 1: then of course you're going to get defensive. Yeah. No,

429
00:25:43,720 --> 00:25:45,600
Speaker 1: you just blame me for stuff to Yeah, I think

430
00:25:45,640 --> 00:25:48,520
Speaker 1: that was great. So he like not only did he

431
00:25:48,800 --> 00:25:53,760
Speaker 1: like take the place to a humble and vulnerable state

432
00:25:53,960 --> 00:25:58,920
Speaker 1: of something. Hey, this is this is how because most

433
00:25:58,920 --> 00:26:01,480
Speaker 1: of the time, the way the way that we respond

434
00:26:01,560 --> 00:26:03,480
Speaker 1: is really about us, it's not about the other person.

435
00:26:03,560 --> 00:26:06,919
Speaker 1: So the way that you responded was in a humble,

436
00:26:07,560 --> 00:26:10,960
Speaker 1: vulnerable way about something about you. The way that I

437
00:26:11,080 --> 00:26:14,440
Speaker 1: then responded about, well, you're just getting defensive and you're

438
00:26:14,480 --> 00:26:18,800
Speaker 1: coming at me. That actually says something about where my

439
00:26:18,920 --> 00:26:22,040
Speaker 1: heart is in responding that way to somebody that's being

440
00:26:22,160 --> 00:26:28,280
Speaker 1: vulnerable and being humble. But I think, Lily, I think

441
00:26:28,320 --> 00:26:31,560
Speaker 1: you follow that lead and regardless of what this person

442
00:26:31,760 --> 00:26:36,920
Speaker 1: your friend does, because you can't control that, even if

443
00:26:36,920 --> 00:26:40,000
Speaker 1: they do it for like fifteen minutes, which can be

444
00:26:40,080 --> 00:26:44,240
Speaker 1: trying for sure, keeping that kind of like, hey, this

445
00:26:44,400 --> 00:26:48,760
Speaker 1: is not about you, it really isn't. I'm struggling with this,

446
00:26:48,880 --> 00:26:52,000
Speaker 1: and you like affirmed me in that it's hard to

447
00:26:52,160 --> 00:26:56,080
Speaker 1: like continue to be defensive when someone is being vulnerable

448
00:26:56,080 --> 00:27:02,040
Speaker 1: and humble and affirming and complimenting you. So yeah, and

449
00:27:02,400 --> 00:27:05,840
Speaker 1: see good, try that, Try that, liad. We're gonna take

450
00:27:05,840 --> 00:27:13,359
Speaker 1: a break through right back. This podcast is brought to

451
00:27:13,400 --> 00:27:16,320
Speaker 1: you in part by Raycon. You know, as touring is

452
00:27:16,320 --> 00:27:18,240
Speaker 1: starting to pick back up for me, and I'm starting

453
00:27:18,240 --> 00:27:20,640
Speaker 1: to look at airplane flights that I haven't looked at

454
00:27:21,040 --> 00:27:23,080
Speaker 1: in a long time, because I didn't fly almost the

455
00:27:23,200 --> 00:27:24,920
Speaker 1: entire year of twenty twenty. I think I had two

456
00:27:25,000 --> 00:27:28,920
Speaker 1: flights as opposed to I'll usually fly in a year,

457
00:27:29,000 --> 00:27:31,880
Speaker 1: about one hundred and twenty flights. It's kind of the average,

458
00:27:32,240 --> 00:27:35,600
Speaker 1: which makes me top of the you know, the chain

459
00:27:35,680 --> 00:27:38,600
Speaker 1: on any airline because I just fly so much that

460
00:27:38,920 --> 00:27:40,800
Speaker 1: and I do that because that gets me home to

461
00:27:40,880 --> 00:27:44,760
Speaker 1: my family on a Sunday morning. So if we're out

462
00:27:44,800 --> 00:27:47,480
Speaker 1: in Illinois, I could fly back and be with the family.

463
00:27:48,280 --> 00:27:51,399
Speaker 1: I spend so much time on airplanes that having good

464
00:27:51,480 --> 00:27:55,080
Speaker 1: earbuds is really really important to me. And so whether

465
00:27:55,119 --> 00:27:56,800
Speaker 1: it's for worker play, a lot of us are going

466
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Speaker 1: to be on the move again this summer, so let

467
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Speaker 1: me give you my advice. Take Raycons with you. And

468
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Speaker 1: I love Raycons. I could listen to podcast or music.

469
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Speaker 1: It just they seel really good. They feel really good

470
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471
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472
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Speaker 1: Raycons look great, They feel better than any other that

473
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474
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475
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476
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Speaker 1: They're really awesome. They have a really good battery life too.

478
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Speaker 1: They'll go for the length of any flight I'm on.

479
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Speaker 1: Raycons will go through the flight, the layover, and the

480
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Speaker 1: next flight, and I never have to charge it, so

481
00:28:51,800 --> 00:28:53,880
Speaker 1: I don't know exactly how long that is, but they work.

482
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494
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495
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496
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498
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506
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507
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531
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Speaker 1: year supply of Vitamin D and five free travel packs today.

547
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Speaker 1: They are awesome. I want to tell you before we

548
00:32:33,760 --> 00:32:37,040
Speaker 1: get back into the podcast with Bernie, I messed up

549
00:32:37,040 --> 00:32:40,840
Speaker 1: a little bit. I messed up, so long story short,

550
00:32:41,040 --> 00:32:45,080
Speaker 1: the audio my computer I record audio. This microphone goes out,

551
00:32:45,520 --> 00:32:47,360
Speaker 1: so you're just gonna hear the camera audio just for

552
00:32:47,360 --> 00:32:49,960
Speaker 1: a short time. Okay, just one question and it's a

553
00:32:50,000 --> 00:32:52,160
Speaker 1: good question, so I wanted to keep it on the podcast,

554
00:32:52,520 --> 00:32:54,440
Speaker 1: So you're gonna want to listen to this one question.

555
00:32:54,640 --> 00:32:56,480
Speaker 1: The audio is gonna sound a little bit different, and

556
00:32:56,520 --> 00:32:58,120
Speaker 1: then after the question, it's going to go back to

557
00:32:58,480 --> 00:33:00,360
Speaker 1: when I figured out I had a problem. We're gonna

558
00:33:00,360 --> 00:33:02,720
Speaker 1: go back to normal audio. So hang with me. I

559
00:33:02,840 --> 00:33:05,520
Speaker 1: promise it. It's not that bad. You'll make it. But

560
00:33:05,560 --> 00:33:09,120
Speaker 1: it's worth me keeping the question. It's about dads. Back

561
00:33:09,120 --> 00:33:16,320
Speaker 1: to the podcast. So coming out of the break, we

562
00:33:16,440 --> 00:33:19,000
Speaker 1: started talking and I'm sorry, I have to go back

563
00:33:19,000 --> 00:33:21,160
Speaker 1: to Lily one more time. You know, we just took

564
00:33:21,160 --> 00:33:23,800
Speaker 1: a commercial break, which is a sponsor break. But if

565
00:33:23,800 --> 00:33:25,840
Speaker 1: you guys remember what we were talking about Lily, what

566
00:33:26,040 --> 00:33:28,400
Speaker 1: was the line? You just dropped it? Like gold, I said,

567
00:33:28,800 --> 00:33:31,560
Speaker 1: the depth of our like in talking to this friend

568
00:33:31,720 --> 00:33:34,800
Speaker 1: and thinking about this friend, that the depth of our

569
00:33:34,840 --> 00:33:40,200
Speaker 1: relationship will be based on the amount, the level that

570
00:33:40,320 --> 00:33:44,800
Speaker 1: you can forgive. Yeah, it will be based on forgiveness. Man.

571
00:33:44,920 --> 00:33:49,080
Speaker 1: On the break, I nailed it. This is spontaneous and

572
00:33:49,120 --> 00:33:52,160
Speaker 1: it was like boom, Grangers like why did we stop camera? Look,

573
00:33:52,600 --> 00:33:55,000
Speaker 1: this is kind of how it works. But yeah, the

574
00:33:55,040 --> 00:33:57,400
Speaker 1: depth of the relationship will be based on your ability

575
00:33:57,440 --> 00:34:02,320
Speaker 1: to forgive boom. All right, close case. The next question

576
00:34:03,360 --> 00:34:07,320
Speaker 1: subject titled Dad says, Hey Grangeer, my name is Darby.

577
00:34:07,680 --> 00:34:10,160
Speaker 1: I'm from Little Rigby, Idaho. Shout out to Idaho I

578
00:34:10,200 --> 00:34:12,720
Speaker 1: love the podcast and watching the Smiths. I was wondering

579
00:34:12,920 --> 00:34:15,919
Speaker 1: what happened to your dad. I lost my dad February fifth,

580
00:34:15,920 --> 00:34:18,680
Speaker 1: twenty seventeen. It's by far the hardest thing I've ever

581
00:34:18,719 --> 00:34:22,759
Speaker 1: dealt with. Beyond thankful for great for grief share, and

582
00:34:22,920 --> 00:34:24,839
Speaker 1: so grateful for having God in my life to get

583
00:34:24,840 --> 00:34:29,320
Speaker 1: me through all of this. Thank you, Darby. I found

584
00:34:29,320 --> 00:34:31,239
Speaker 1: this question this morning, and I brought it up because

585
00:34:31,239 --> 00:34:32,840
Speaker 1: I knew you were gonna be on the podcast Burns

586
00:34:32,960 --> 00:34:34,840
Speaker 1: and so that makes three of us Derby that have

587
00:34:34,880 --> 00:34:38,279
Speaker 1: gone through this, be Burns and you. I lost my

588
00:34:38,360 --> 00:34:42,520
Speaker 1: dad March fifth, twenty fourteen, was a sudden heart attack.

589
00:34:42,840 --> 00:34:46,080
Speaker 1: I haven't talked about it very often, if ever, on

590
00:34:46,239 --> 00:34:48,560
Speaker 1: the Smiths or on a podcast or in anything, but

591
00:34:49,480 --> 00:34:53,759
Speaker 1: we lost him suddenly. My mom was visiting Lincoln, my

592
00:34:54,360 --> 00:34:57,759
Speaker 1: middle boy was just born. He was two months old,

593
00:34:57,760 --> 00:35:00,680
Speaker 1: and my mom was visiting, staying a couple days and

594
00:35:00,760 --> 00:35:05,000
Speaker 1: spending some time with little baby Lincoln, and my dad

595
00:35:05,160 --> 00:35:08,480
Speaker 1: was home. He lived on a farm. He was sixty

596
00:35:08,800 --> 00:35:11,400
Speaker 1: one years old. In fact, we buried him on his

597
00:35:11,440 --> 00:35:15,319
Speaker 1: sixty first birthday, and he was doing some stuff in

598
00:35:15,360 --> 00:35:18,520
Speaker 1: the yard. We don't really know because my mom drove

599
00:35:18,600 --> 00:35:24,320
Speaker 1: home on the third day and about five thirty pm

600
00:35:24,440 --> 00:35:27,200
Speaker 1: she pulled into the house. The lights were off, still

601
00:35:27,280 --> 00:35:30,160
Speaker 1: dark in March. At five point thirty pm, she pulled

602
00:35:30,200 --> 00:35:32,200
Speaker 1: in and all the lights were off in the house.

603
00:35:32,200 --> 00:35:34,680
Speaker 1: She called his name a couple of times, and she

604
00:35:34,800 --> 00:35:36,880
Speaker 1: just got a weird feeling, and she went back to

605
00:35:37,719 --> 00:35:40,360
Speaker 1: their bedroom and he was sitting in the chair in

606
00:35:40,400 --> 00:35:44,120
Speaker 1: the dark, and he was like he was just sleeping.

607
00:35:44,360 --> 00:35:46,160
Speaker 1: He just kind of turned his head to his side

608
00:35:46,200 --> 00:35:49,360
Speaker 1: and closed his eyes, and Mom said, all we know

609
00:35:49,800 --> 00:35:52,520
Speaker 1: is Mom said, he had the top of his hand

610
00:35:52,880 --> 00:35:57,400
Speaker 1: under his belt in his waist. There was a rag

611
00:35:57,520 --> 00:36:00,560
Speaker 1: on the floor that looked like it was wet earlier,

612
00:36:00,600 --> 00:36:04,040
Speaker 1: like maybe he was wiping his forehead. Maybe he was dizzy.

613
00:36:05,080 --> 00:36:07,840
Speaker 1: And his phone was still plugged in in the kitchen,

614
00:36:07,840 --> 00:36:10,760
Speaker 1: which means there was no time to say I should

615
00:36:10,760 --> 00:36:14,520
Speaker 1: call a doctor. There was a weed eater and a

616
00:36:17,719 --> 00:36:20,759
Speaker 1: chainsaw that was taken apart out in the yard that

617
00:36:20,800 --> 00:36:25,120
Speaker 1: he had apparently been working on and fixing. It was springtime,

618
00:36:25,160 --> 00:36:28,400
Speaker 1: you know, he was doing things like that. And then

619
00:36:28,440 --> 00:36:30,600
Speaker 1: the computer we logged into the I'm going through all

620
00:36:30,640 --> 00:36:32,600
Speaker 1: the things we know. We logged into the computer, and

621
00:36:32,640 --> 00:36:36,719
Speaker 1: he had been on at eleven am was the last

622
00:36:36,719 --> 00:36:40,120
Speaker 1: time he logged out of the computer, and the trash

623
00:36:40,280 --> 00:36:42,399
Speaker 1: was It was a Wednesday. The trash was by the door,

624
00:36:42,400 --> 00:36:45,239
Speaker 1: which he always took down at noon, all leading to

625
00:36:45,239 --> 00:36:49,120
Speaker 1: the fact that this happened somewhere between eleven am and noon.

626
00:36:50,120 --> 00:36:52,840
Speaker 1: He must have been working on a weed eater, felt lightheaded,

627
00:36:53,000 --> 00:36:56,600
Speaker 1: maybe dizzy, said I should go sit down, but still

628
00:36:56,640 --> 00:36:59,160
Speaker 1: nothing alarming him to grab a punk, to grab a phone,

629
00:36:59,320 --> 00:37:02,520
Speaker 1: sat down, and he had a massive heart attack and

630
00:37:02,560 --> 00:37:05,799
Speaker 1: it killed him right there. M So that was you know,

631
00:37:05,880 --> 00:37:10,200
Speaker 1: my mom called me and said the words that I'll

632
00:37:10,239 --> 00:37:14,279
Speaker 1: never ever forget. She said, granger. I said, yeah. She said,

633
00:37:14,320 --> 00:37:16,560
Speaker 1: what are you doing? I said, just eating pizza with

634
00:37:16,600 --> 00:37:21,040
Speaker 1: the kids, And she said, your dad had a heart

635
00:37:21,040 --> 00:37:26,360
Speaker 1: attack and he died. And it was like the you know,

636
00:37:26,600 --> 00:37:29,200
Speaker 1: I couldn't even process the heart attack part, much less

637
00:37:29,239 --> 00:37:31,600
Speaker 1: the second part of the sentence. And I just couldn't.

638
00:37:32,280 --> 00:37:37,799
Speaker 1: I was trying to process that so fast. And but yeah,

639
00:37:37,840 --> 00:37:41,319
Speaker 1: to speak to you, Darby, I agree. He said, it's

640
00:37:41,320 --> 00:37:43,279
Speaker 1: the hardest, by far, the hardest thing I've ever dealt with.

641
00:37:43,960 --> 00:37:46,560
Speaker 1: I get it, man, I get it that these things

642
00:37:48,120 --> 00:37:52,879
Speaker 1: typically losing a dad happens to everybody most of the time.

643
00:37:53,920 --> 00:37:57,879
Speaker 1: That's something that's relative to all humans. We lose a dad,

644
00:37:59,200 --> 00:38:01,840
Speaker 1: but it still doesn't make it doesn't make it easier

645
00:38:01,920 --> 00:38:03,920
Speaker 1: no matter I've talked to people that have lost their

646
00:38:04,000 --> 00:38:10,520
Speaker 1: dad due to cancer and it's been years of regression

647
00:38:11,560 --> 00:38:16,160
Speaker 1: and slow death, and then I've talked to people like

648
00:38:16,200 --> 00:38:18,560
Speaker 1: me who lost him instantly, and there doesn't seem to

649
00:38:18,560 --> 00:38:23,239
Speaker 1: be a difference in the grief really at all. It's

650
00:38:23,360 --> 00:38:25,640
Speaker 1: just hard no matter what. And Bernie, you got a

651
00:38:25,680 --> 00:38:30,480
Speaker 1: story too. Yeah, I think that I would fall into

652
00:38:30,520 --> 00:38:37,040
Speaker 1: that category, opposite of Granger. I lost my dad last

653
00:38:37,840 --> 00:38:45,440
Speaker 1: December twenty twenty, a few days before Christmas. So my

654
00:38:45,600 --> 00:38:51,319
Speaker 1: dad had had a lot of medical issues for a

655
00:38:51,360 --> 00:38:56,440
Speaker 1: long time. In twenty seventeen, I think twenty sixteen, he

656
00:38:56,520 --> 00:39:00,200
Speaker 1: had a heart attack that should have killed him. And

657
00:39:00,239 --> 00:39:02,319
Speaker 1: every doctor that, because he lives in a small town

658
00:39:02,320 --> 00:39:08,359
Speaker 1: in East Texas, hospital is not, you know, set up

659
00:39:08,400 --> 00:39:12,359
Speaker 1: to handle what he was experiencing. And somehow they had

660
00:39:12,400 --> 00:39:14,759
Speaker 1: the wherewithal to get on the hospital or get on

661
00:39:14,760 --> 00:39:19,400
Speaker 1: the phone to the hospital in Tyler, and the doctor

662
00:39:19,600 --> 00:39:21,160
Speaker 1: happened to be there and get on the phone and

663
00:39:21,239 --> 00:39:23,279
Speaker 1: walk them through, Hey, this is exactly what you need

664
00:39:23,320 --> 00:39:27,359
Speaker 1: to do, and got him life lighted and ended up

665
00:39:27,400 --> 00:39:34,759
Speaker 1: saving his life. From there, it was the next three

666
00:39:34,880 --> 00:39:39,400
Speaker 1: years were three three and a half years were very

667
00:39:39,480 --> 00:39:45,400
Speaker 1: much a lot of hospital visits, a lot of medical issues.

668
00:39:45,440 --> 00:39:49,799
Speaker 1: There was times where, you know, my siblings, we would

669
00:39:49,840 --> 00:39:53,359
Speaker 1: be like, Okay, we need to go because this is it. Yeah,

670
00:39:54,000 --> 00:39:56,400
Speaker 1: And then I mean, this guy would just like keep

671
00:39:56,800 --> 00:40:00,480
Speaker 1: pulling through like it was like the dot would call

672
00:40:00,520 --> 00:40:02,560
Speaker 1: us and be like, yeah, you know his nars, you

673
00:40:02,560 --> 00:40:05,080
Speaker 1: probably need to come. It's like he would just find

674
00:40:05,120 --> 00:40:07,840
Speaker 1: a way just keep living. Yeah, it's like, my goodness,

675
00:40:08,680 --> 00:40:12,640
Speaker 1: And I'll tell you what his And I'm not going

676
00:40:12,719 --> 00:40:15,200
Speaker 1: to go into a long tangent here, but I know

677
00:40:15,360 --> 00:40:17,120
Speaker 1: that there's people out there that have a lot of

678
00:40:17,120 --> 00:40:21,080
Speaker 1: different kinds of relationships with their dads. You know, Granger

679
00:40:21,120 --> 00:40:24,120
Speaker 1: and his dad and me and my dad. The way

680
00:40:24,160 --> 00:40:27,040
Speaker 1: that you lost him, y'all's relationship up until that point.

681
00:40:28,760 --> 00:40:31,640
Speaker 1: But my relationship with my dad was, you know, he

682
00:40:32,200 --> 00:40:35,920
Speaker 1: left our family, My parents were divorced. He left, and

683
00:40:35,960 --> 00:40:39,120
Speaker 1: then he came back when I was very young, and

684
00:40:39,160 --> 00:40:41,359
Speaker 1: then he came back and promised our family he would

685
00:40:41,360 --> 00:40:43,640
Speaker 1: never leave again. And then he left again. And I

686
00:40:43,680 --> 00:40:46,040
Speaker 1: can't put that all on him. I know that marriage

687
00:40:46,120 --> 00:40:49,080
Speaker 1: is tough and you know, raising kids and all that stuff,

688
00:40:49,920 --> 00:40:52,279
Speaker 1: but he left and there was definitely you know, I

689
00:40:52,360 --> 00:40:54,840
Speaker 1: was a mama's boy, and I was very loyal to

690
00:40:54,880 --> 00:40:57,040
Speaker 1: my mom, and there was a lot of distance between

691
00:40:57,040 --> 00:41:00,439
Speaker 1: me and my dad. After my mom passed the way

692
00:41:01,440 --> 00:41:05,960
Speaker 1: in two thousand and four, I think that that did

693
00:41:06,080 --> 00:41:09,400
Speaker 1: set up some kind of avenue to restore this relationship

694
00:41:09,400 --> 00:41:15,320
Speaker 1: with my dad. And I'll tell you what, it took

695
00:41:15,760 --> 00:41:20,680
Speaker 1: years and years and years of my dad fighting for

696
00:41:20,760 --> 00:41:24,600
Speaker 1: me and just continuing to come back and tell me

697
00:41:25,160 --> 00:41:27,479
Speaker 1: I love you, I'm proud of you. And it wasn't

698
00:41:27,560 --> 00:41:32,480
Speaker 1: until after that heart attack that he just had a

699
00:41:32,560 --> 00:41:37,160
Speaker 1: new life. He literally lived every day because for him,

700
00:41:37,200 --> 00:41:39,520
Speaker 1: it was like, hey, I the doctor told me, I'm

701
00:41:39,520 --> 00:41:42,799
Speaker 1: on borrowed time. Yeah, And he really lived every day,

702
00:41:43,280 --> 00:41:46,080
Speaker 1: you know, the last years of his life and it

703
00:41:46,520 --> 00:41:50,120
Speaker 1: and there finally dawned on me. At one point I

704
00:41:50,200 --> 00:41:54,719
Speaker 1: called him and they had or no. He called me

705
00:41:54,719 --> 00:41:58,839
Speaker 1: and said, hey, the doctor said, my heart disease, heart

706
00:41:58,840 --> 00:42:03,560
Speaker 1: failure has gone to stage. So they're giving me, you know,

707
00:42:03,600 --> 00:42:06,280
Speaker 1: a few weeks maybe a couple months at the most,

708
00:42:07,000 --> 00:42:08,800
Speaker 1: and I just had to tell him in that moment,

709
00:42:08,920 --> 00:42:11,120
Speaker 1: like man, Dad. He was like, I'm so proud of

710
00:42:11,120 --> 00:42:14,160
Speaker 1: you and everything, and I was like, hold up, I'm

711
00:42:14,160 --> 00:42:19,759
Speaker 1: proud of you. I'm proud of you for just continuing

712
00:42:19,760 --> 00:42:24,200
Speaker 1: to love me and pursue me. And our relationship here

713
00:42:24,360 --> 00:42:29,839
Speaker 1: is not like the American dream Father's Son, but it's

714
00:42:29,880 --> 00:42:34,120
Speaker 1: a story of redemption and reconciliation and I love our story.

715
00:42:34,520 --> 00:42:39,360
Speaker 1: I wouldn't change it for anything. And he had another

716
00:42:39,600 --> 00:42:42,200
Speaker 1: three weeks to a month that he pushed to another

717
00:42:42,360 --> 00:42:47,920
Speaker 1: nine months. Somehow I know that he got to heaven

718
00:42:47,960 --> 00:42:49,960
Speaker 1: and I was like, we're so glad you're here. We

719
00:42:50,040 --> 00:42:53,560
Speaker 1: expected you a while ago, but we're glad you're here now.

720
00:42:56,560 --> 00:43:00,120
Speaker 1: But the backside of that, I think because of that,

721
00:43:01,560 --> 00:43:05,640
Speaker 1: like Chris said, the grief doesn't change. The grief is

722
00:43:05,640 --> 00:43:09,080
Speaker 1: still there. We still have to work through it. But

723
00:43:09,200 --> 00:43:12,760
Speaker 1: I think it does look different the way that life

724
00:43:12,880 --> 00:43:15,560
Speaker 1: that you experienced death, would you agree the way that

725
00:43:15,600 --> 00:43:19,719
Speaker 1: we experience it, and that and the relationship that was

726
00:43:19,760 --> 00:43:23,280
Speaker 1: there and the dynamics of it will play a part

727
00:43:23,360 --> 00:43:28,280
Speaker 1: and how you grieve and how you work through whatever

728
00:43:28,360 --> 00:43:31,399
Speaker 1: events led up to that I want to reword one

729
00:43:31,400 --> 00:43:33,560
Speaker 1: thing you said, and I know you agree because we

730
00:43:33,840 --> 00:43:37,280
Speaker 1: have the same beliefs. But the words from God weren't.

731
00:43:37,400 --> 00:43:40,480
Speaker 1: We didn't expect you. The words were. We gave you

732
00:43:40,520 --> 00:43:44,080
Speaker 1: a little extra time and you did exactly what you

733
00:43:44,120 --> 00:43:46,480
Speaker 1: needed to do with you made the best. Well done,

734
00:43:46,560 --> 00:43:49,359
Speaker 1: my good and faithfuls servant, That's what he said. Oh,

735
00:43:49,400 --> 00:43:53,319
Speaker 1: absolutely absolutely, God extended that time on purpose. God is

736
00:43:53,360 --> 00:43:56,720
Speaker 1: in control of our time. Yeah, absolutely not not doctors

737
00:43:56,880 --> 00:44:01,560
Speaker 1: or or are wherewithal the pool through. Yeah, he was

738
00:44:01,600 --> 00:44:04,160
Speaker 1: given that time for a reason. He was, and it

739
00:44:04,200 --> 00:44:06,960
Speaker 1: was for you to tell the story of redemption and restoration,

740
00:44:07,120 --> 00:44:11,359
Speaker 1: partly to other people that could hear, like Darby and Dude,

741
00:44:11,360 --> 00:44:16,560
Speaker 1: you're spot on, and Darby you are too. Man, it's hard.

742
00:44:17,160 --> 00:44:20,840
Speaker 1: I'm glad that you're in Greef share like you said,

743
00:44:21,080 --> 00:44:23,960
Speaker 1: and that you say, I'm beyond grateful for having God

744
00:44:24,000 --> 00:44:26,160
Speaker 1: in my life to get through all this. That's exactly right.

745
00:44:26,239 --> 00:44:31,200
Speaker 1: You are grateful and you praise We praise God through

746
00:44:31,719 --> 00:44:36,720
Speaker 1: our suffering. And it's it's a misunderstanding of spiritual people

747
00:44:36,760 --> 00:44:41,960
Speaker 1: to say that God is God heals all, and he

748
00:44:41,960 --> 00:44:45,239
Speaker 1: heals all physical ailments. He's like a Genie canny. Yes,

749
00:44:45,320 --> 00:44:48,120
Speaker 1: he absolutely can, but that's not what he does. Most

750
00:44:48,160 --> 00:44:51,239
Speaker 1: of the time, he doesn't because we need to go

751
00:44:51,320 --> 00:44:53,960
Speaker 1: through suffering and praise him so that we could find

752
00:44:54,800 --> 00:44:57,000
Speaker 1: the difference between light and dark. If all we had

753
00:44:57,120 --> 00:45:00,440
Speaker 1: was light without any dark, there wouldn't be a dressed.

754
00:45:00,480 --> 00:45:05,080
Speaker 1: If all we had was good and blissfulness, that's right,

755
00:45:05,120 --> 00:45:10,200
Speaker 1: we would never appreciate the victory, the true victory in football,

756
00:45:10,239 --> 00:45:13,920
Speaker 1: if you won every game without a loss, then the

757
00:45:14,000 --> 00:45:17,400
Speaker 1: championship wouldn't mean as much as if you had gone

758
00:45:17,440 --> 00:45:22,120
Speaker 1: through a year of losing and struggling and rebuilding and relearning,

759
00:45:22,719 --> 00:45:25,799
Speaker 1: and then you built back up through the suffering, through

760
00:45:25,840 --> 00:45:28,360
Speaker 1: the tribulation, and you made it and you win the

761
00:45:28,480 --> 00:45:33,799
Speaker 1: championship and you celebrate because you have overcome through adversity,

762
00:45:34,680 --> 00:45:37,680
Speaker 1: and that is the meaning of life. Now, I think

763
00:45:37,719 --> 00:45:43,279
Speaker 1: you're right, man. The worst basis that evangelism can take

764
00:45:44,000 --> 00:45:48,520
Speaker 1: is that God is like a pill. Hey, just take

765
00:45:48,600 --> 00:45:55,520
Speaker 1: this and kill everything, cure everything, and there's a lot

766
00:45:55,560 --> 00:45:57,640
Speaker 1: of people, you know, just speak it and it's going

767
00:45:57,719 --> 00:46:01,120
Speaker 1: to happen. I understand the power of our words, and

768
00:46:01,960 --> 00:46:06,520
Speaker 1: I understand where they're going with that intention. But we

769
00:46:06,600 --> 00:46:09,319
Speaker 1: know from life experience that that and we know from

770
00:46:09,320 --> 00:46:12,000
Speaker 1: God's who are that is not true. It's not how

771
00:46:12,000 --> 00:46:13,480
Speaker 1: he works and what you're going to end up doing.

772
00:46:13,520 --> 00:46:16,000
Speaker 1: If you're spinning that kind of gospel, you're going to

773
00:46:16,080 --> 00:46:23,600
Speaker 1: lead people to just feeling broken, trust in, mad, upset, disappointed,

774
00:46:23,640 --> 00:46:27,000
Speaker 1: and frustrated, more with God, and more in disbelief than

775
00:46:27,000 --> 00:46:28,640
Speaker 1: they were before you told him about it. So how

776
00:46:28,640 --> 00:46:30,479
Speaker 1: many times have we heard people say, I'm just really

777
00:46:30,520 --> 00:46:33,400
Speaker 1: mad at God right now because I don't understand if

778
00:46:33,400 --> 00:46:35,439
Speaker 1: there's a God out there. I don't understand a God

779
00:46:35,440 --> 00:46:39,280
Speaker 1: that would allow little children to suffer and get cancer.

780
00:46:39,360 --> 00:46:41,440
Speaker 1: And I don't understand a God that would allow wars

781
00:46:41,480 --> 00:46:45,319
Speaker 1: to happen. And you're missing the point of God is

782
00:46:45,400 --> 00:46:50,520
Speaker 1: do you really want a perfect, little, blissful life. Would

783
00:46:50,520 --> 00:46:54,839
Speaker 1: you ever know the brilliant beauty of light if you've

784
00:46:54,880 --> 00:46:58,480
Speaker 1: never seen dark? No? The answer is no. And we

785
00:46:58,600 --> 00:47:02,799
Speaker 1: have these tiny little that are trying to understand, like

786
00:47:03,800 --> 00:47:10,040
Speaker 1: these universal mysteries come on guys like we are not

787
00:47:10,320 --> 00:47:14,080
Speaker 1: the most intelligent generation that's ever lived, don't we don't

788
00:47:14,480 --> 00:47:17,600
Speaker 1: understand nearly as much as we think we do. Yeah,

789
00:47:18,360 --> 00:47:21,480
Speaker 1: I hate to make a spiritual reference to the Matrix.

790
00:47:21,960 --> 00:47:24,279
Speaker 1: But dude, the movie The Matrix hits its spot on

791
00:47:24,400 --> 00:47:27,880
Speaker 1: when the machine world is telling the humans that we

792
00:47:28,040 --> 00:47:32,480
Speaker 1: tried to create which the matrix is the software program

793
00:47:32,600 --> 00:47:36,840
Speaker 1: that allows humans to live. So they're talking about we

794
00:47:36,920 --> 00:47:39,120
Speaker 1: tried this world, this human world, to try to create

795
00:47:39,160 --> 00:47:42,520
Speaker 1: it on the software program, many many times, giving them

796
00:47:42,560 --> 00:47:45,120
Speaker 1: the perfect life, until we realize the only way humans

797
00:47:45,160 --> 00:47:49,720
Speaker 1: could live is by entering evil and suffering into their lives,

798
00:47:50,080 --> 00:47:52,440
Speaker 1: because unless they can overcome it and make it through it,

799
00:47:52,840 --> 00:47:57,040
Speaker 1: they can't survive. They can't survive in perfect unity, not

800
00:47:57,120 --> 00:47:59,880
Speaker 1: in this world, not on Earth. We have to have

801
00:48:00,080 --> 00:48:03,879
Speaker 1: of we have to have trials that we fight through

802
00:48:03,920 --> 00:48:06,640
Speaker 1: and we make it through the other side and we

803
00:48:06,960 --> 00:48:13,280
Speaker 1: feel confident and encouraged and hopeful because of that. So, Darby,

804
00:48:14,640 --> 00:48:17,920
Speaker 1: you're you're on the path. I'd like to say this, Derby,

805
00:48:18,520 --> 00:48:20,120
Speaker 1: if you say this is the hardest thing you've ever

806
00:48:20,160 --> 00:48:22,759
Speaker 1: dealt with losing your dad, that means you got to

807
00:48:22,760 --> 00:48:26,399
Speaker 1: have pretty you had a pretty good dead. Yeah, because

808
00:48:26,400 --> 00:48:29,359
Speaker 1: you said that, you wouldn't have said that, no, great point,

809
00:48:29,880 --> 00:48:32,399
Speaker 1: great point, And and the weight that you're carrying right

810
00:48:32,400 --> 00:48:38,120
Speaker 1: now is is a testament to that. Like I think

811
00:48:38,160 --> 00:48:41,880
Speaker 1: you've told me that before. Like the weight of the

812
00:48:41,960 --> 00:48:45,680
Speaker 1: loss is reflected by the depth of the love that

813
00:48:45,920 --> 00:48:48,799
Speaker 1: you have for the amount the amount of grief we have,

814
00:48:48,920 --> 00:48:52,880
Speaker 1: and a loss is paid for by the love. It's equal.

815
00:48:52,920 --> 00:48:56,279
Speaker 1: However much love you have for someone, you're gonna have

816
00:48:56,719 --> 00:48:59,440
Speaker 1: a proportionate amount of grief when you lose them. So

817
00:48:59,480 --> 00:49:01,520
Speaker 1: the more if you have, that means the more love

818
00:49:01,560 --> 00:49:03,680
Speaker 1: you have, and you don't want to get rid of

819
00:49:03,680 --> 00:49:06,680
Speaker 1: the love. So of course we hate grief, we hate

820
00:49:06,719 --> 00:49:09,279
Speaker 1: growing through loss. But the more we have, the more

821
00:49:09,320 --> 00:49:13,279
Speaker 1: we realize the more love that we shared. And that's

822
00:49:13,320 --> 00:49:15,319
Speaker 1: the most important thing. Because you wouldn't want to sit

823
00:49:15,360 --> 00:49:17,799
Speaker 1: here and go, I lost my dad, Good riddance, Dad

824
00:49:18,000 --> 00:49:21,200
Speaker 1: was terrible. What good does that do for you? And

825
00:49:21,239 --> 00:49:23,720
Speaker 1: what impact does that have in your life? Forever? Darby,

826
00:49:23,719 --> 00:49:25,839
Speaker 1: you will be able to live and move forward and go,

827
00:49:26,640 --> 00:49:28,920
Speaker 1: I have one of the good ones. And you might

828
00:49:28,960 --> 00:49:31,000
Speaker 1: look around and you might see bad dads out there

829
00:49:31,040 --> 00:49:34,160
Speaker 1: and go, how did this old man survive? And my

830
00:49:34,280 --> 00:49:37,520
Speaker 1: dad didn't? You know? You might think that, but the

831
00:49:37,560 --> 00:49:41,160
Speaker 1: reality is you'll have that memory and that within you

832
00:49:41,320 --> 00:49:47,520
Speaker 1: of your dad forever. Good question. Many burds I I'm

833
00:49:47,520 --> 00:49:50,840
Speaker 1: gonna leave this one to you. Okay, we got homeboys

834
00:49:50,840 --> 00:49:54,640
Speaker 1: in Christ. I need some advice that rhymes we have

835
00:49:54,680 --> 00:49:57,200
Speaker 1: a question for the podcast when you have Hay Granger.

836
00:49:57,239 --> 00:50:02,680
Speaker 1: I need some advice, promotion, alcoholic veteran needs help. Another

837
00:50:02,800 --> 00:50:07,800
Speaker 1: please read in all caps Faith and Friends slash fan reactions,

838
00:50:07,840 --> 00:50:16,120
Speaker 1: and playing Overseas. I kind of want to go with

839
00:50:16,239 --> 00:50:19,280
Speaker 1: playing Overseas because I'm hoping that it's like an invitation

840
00:50:19,480 --> 00:50:22,080
Speaker 1: for me and you to go do the podcast overseas,

841
00:50:22,080 --> 00:50:25,040
Speaker 1: but I don't think that's what they're going for. So

842
00:50:25,160 --> 00:50:28,640
Speaker 1: and then the first one is just intriguing because it's

843
00:50:28,680 --> 00:50:32,279
Speaker 1: like everything in me doesn't want to pick that one,

844
00:50:32,400 --> 00:50:35,080
Speaker 1: but I kind of have to go with it. It's

845
00:50:35,200 --> 00:50:37,880
Speaker 1: well done on I don't know if you're trying to

846
00:50:37,880 --> 00:50:40,920
Speaker 1: be super cheesy so it would get attention, but it worked.

847
00:50:41,080 --> 00:50:44,440
Speaker 1: Oh boys and christ I need some advice. After the

848
00:50:44,520 --> 00:50:49,960
Speaker 1: question about dads, which is a great question, we realized

849
00:50:50,000 --> 00:50:53,319
Speaker 1: that the EEE podcast, which is held in the same room,

850
00:50:55,239 --> 00:50:59,200
Speaker 1: had used a plugged in an outlet that was plugged

851
00:50:59,239 --> 00:51:01,799
Speaker 1: into my computer. It was unplugged. I didn't know about it,

852
00:51:01,800 --> 00:51:06,279
Speaker 1: so the computer died during the dad segment. So what

853
00:51:06,360 --> 00:51:09,080
Speaker 1: you what you hear now is a slight audio change.

854
00:51:09,280 --> 00:51:11,960
Speaker 1: So we're back to these microphones again. The microphones. We're

855
00:51:12,000 --> 00:51:15,040
Speaker 1: learning lessons again and again. Guys. Okay, the lesson is

856
00:51:15,160 --> 00:51:20,880
Speaker 1: to plug in. The lesson is blame others. Right, did

857
00:51:20,960 --> 00:51:23,080
Speaker 1: we talk about this on this podcast something like that?

858
00:51:25,640 --> 00:51:29,280
Speaker 1: Was it, Lily? I think it was. Yeah, the best

859
00:51:29,280 --> 00:51:31,239
Speaker 1: that you can. That's right. You've got to be really

860
00:51:31,280 --> 00:51:33,360
Speaker 1: good about it for it to go over. Blame the

861
00:51:33,440 --> 00:51:38,279
Speaker 1: ye Yeek podcast guys for unplugging these microphones and not

862
00:51:38,880 --> 00:51:42,520
Speaker 1: myself and not knowing that the clearly on the laptop

863
00:51:43,080 --> 00:51:45,319
Speaker 1: there is not a little charge signal in the top

864
00:51:45,400 --> 00:51:49,920
Speaker 1: right corner. That's not my fault. So so we're back

865
00:51:49,960 --> 00:51:52,759
Speaker 1: full circle. But the good news is I had just

866
00:51:52,800 --> 00:51:56,759
Speaker 1: started reading this next question when we realized that the

867
00:51:56,800 --> 00:51:59,480
Speaker 1: power died on the mics. I realized I had just

868
00:51:59,480 --> 00:52:07,719
Speaker 1: started reading. In fact, I'm gonna like triple check this camera. Yeah. Good.

869
00:52:09,360 --> 00:52:12,520
Speaker 1: The good news is I just started reading the next

870
00:52:12,600 --> 00:52:15,640
Speaker 1: question when the when the microphones died? And it's a

871
00:52:15,680 --> 00:52:21,080
Speaker 1: really good question. So the good news is I get

872
00:52:21,120 --> 00:52:24,319
Speaker 1: to read it again and we hadn't started answering it yet.

873
00:52:24,320 --> 00:52:29,560
Speaker 1: That's right. That's right. The question titled homeboys in Christ

874
00:52:29,680 --> 00:52:32,480
Speaker 1: I need some advice, which I don't know if she

875
00:52:32,560 --> 00:52:35,040
Speaker 1: meant to rhyme that. Maybe she didn't even mean to

876
00:52:35,120 --> 00:52:39,960
Speaker 1: rhyme that homeboys in Christ I need some advice, It says,

877
00:52:40,080 --> 00:52:43,359
Speaker 1: Hey Granger and probably Bernie. I love the podcast. I'm

878
00:52:43,360 --> 00:52:47,000
Speaker 1: a huge Yeee fan, music fan, all things Smith family,

879
00:52:47,120 --> 00:52:50,520
Speaker 1: except for the guys that do the yee podcast. Sometimes

880
00:52:50,560 --> 00:52:55,080
Speaker 1: they unplug cables. That's exactly right. Hey, my name is Megan.

881
00:52:56,200 --> 00:52:58,960
Speaker 1: I'm from Washington State, just north of Seattle, and I

882
00:52:59,120 --> 00:53:01,960
Speaker 1: just turned twenty a few days ago. I'm graduating college

883
00:53:01,960 --> 00:53:04,960
Speaker 1: this summer with my bachelor's degree in emergency management and

884
00:53:04,960 --> 00:53:07,920
Speaker 1: homeland security. And for the last few years it's been

885
00:53:08,000 --> 00:53:10,560
Speaker 1: my dream to be a police officer. The state of

886
00:53:10,560 --> 00:53:13,280
Speaker 1: the current world and negative views on law enforcement haven't

887
00:53:13,320 --> 00:53:17,799
Speaker 1: even swayed the career path I'm taking. However, I've been

888
00:53:17,840 --> 00:53:21,040
Speaker 1: told by many close family and friends Christ followers alike

889
00:53:21,080 --> 00:53:23,920
Speaker 1: who work in the field that I should not pursue

890
00:53:23,920 --> 00:53:27,080
Speaker 1: this career. I have prayed about this decision, that God

891
00:53:27,120 --> 00:53:30,920
Speaker 1: would open and close doors accordingly. As things began to

892
00:53:30,960 --> 00:53:34,320
Speaker 1: get real and I have to begin public safety testing

893
00:53:34,360 --> 00:53:37,280
Speaker 1: in October, it has been difficult to discern God's voice

894
00:53:37,480 --> 00:53:41,520
Speaker 1: amongst my own selfish desires in the advice of fellow

895
00:53:41,560 --> 00:53:44,840
Speaker 1: Christians who have lived the reality of the job, do

896
00:53:44,880 --> 00:53:46,799
Speaker 1: you have any advice on how to know if I'm

897
00:53:46,800 --> 00:53:49,880
Speaker 1: making a poor choice by pursuing this career even though

898
00:53:49,920 --> 00:53:52,360
Speaker 1: I'm being advised against it by the people I know

899
00:53:52,480 --> 00:53:56,600
Speaker 1: and trust. Note, I'm aware that law enforcement is a

900
00:53:56,640 --> 00:53:59,880
Speaker 1: really gnarly career path, and I understand it has me

901
00:54:00,160 --> 00:54:04,520
Speaker 1: sacrifices it must be made. Thanks Megan. Awesome, awesome question.

902
00:54:04,760 --> 00:54:08,160
Speaker 1: Awesome question. We love this question. We could do an

903
00:54:08,400 --> 00:54:13,160
Speaker 1: entire podcast on this one topic subject. Love this question.

904
00:54:13,480 --> 00:54:19,280
Speaker 1: It's great. Your heart, Megan, is in the right place.

905
00:54:19,640 --> 00:54:21,840
Speaker 1: What's interesting is we started this whole podcast and you

906
00:54:21,920 --> 00:54:26,480
Speaker 1: started it by saying, seek wise counsel, listen to God's word, right,

907
00:54:26,640 --> 00:54:31,719
Speaker 1: follow God's word seq And so we have a conflicting

908
00:54:31,760 --> 00:54:36,319
Speaker 1: interest in this email. Yep. Kind of yeah, because she's

909
00:54:36,360 --> 00:54:41,560
Speaker 1: hearing her wise counsel speak against this. Yep. I would.

910
00:54:42,320 --> 00:54:45,799
Speaker 1: So first, you know, going back, you know, because I

911
00:54:45,800 --> 00:54:48,560
Speaker 1: think they're in decision making, there's usually like three things

912
00:54:48,680 --> 00:54:51,239
Speaker 1: I like to kind of process them through. First is

913
00:54:51,239 --> 00:54:55,320
Speaker 1: what does God's word say? Is there anything in God's

914
00:54:55,320 --> 00:54:57,799
Speaker 1: word that is directly saying like, hey, you should not

915
00:54:58,600 --> 00:55:04,759
Speaker 1: do this? You know? Next is what do God's people say?

916
00:55:04,800 --> 00:55:09,680
Speaker 1: And that's your wise counsel, Like, is there any more experienced,

917
00:55:11,440 --> 00:55:14,600
Speaker 1: you know, respected people in my life that I have

918
00:55:14,880 --> 00:55:19,080
Speaker 1: reason for me not to do this that they advise?

919
00:55:19,160 --> 00:55:21,520
Speaker 1: So I think that's kind of where you're at right here.

920
00:55:25,160 --> 00:55:28,600
Speaker 1: And it sounds like you're getting some conflict. The last

921
00:55:28,600 --> 00:55:30,359
Speaker 1: thing if you made it through those, the last thing

922
00:55:30,480 --> 00:55:32,759
Speaker 1: is that I usually process it through, is what do

923
00:55:32,760 --> 00:55:34,480
Speaker 1: you want to do? I think there's tons of freedom

924
00:55:35,120 --> 00:55:38,680
Speaker 1: in our lives that God gives us. And if God's

925
00:55:38,719 --> 00:55:42,520
Speaker 1: word doesn't have anything affirms it, if the people around

926
00:55:42,560 --> 00:55:46,600
Speaker 1: you affirm it, or you process that with them, and

927
00:55:46,640 --> 00:55:47,839
Speaker 1: then it's just what do you want to do? Make

928
00:55:47,880 --> 00:55:50,960
Speaker 1: a decision and go for what I was going to

929
00:55:51,000 --> 00:55:57,200
Speaker 1: say earlier. I'm not the best on Bible references locations,

930
00:55:57,200 --> 00:55:59,919
Speaker 1: so somebody can comment where this is for my own bete.

931
00:56:00,400 --> 00:56:02,680
Speaker 1: But in James where it talks about don't go to

932
00:56:02,760 --> 00:56:05,319
Speaker 1: a foreign place and work and say I'm gonna work

933
00:56:05,360 --> 00:56:07,440
Speaker 1: here a year and then I'm gonna come back. But

934
00:56:07,600 --> 00:56:12,000
Speaker 1: instead so if God wills it, then you go here

935
00:56:12,719 --> 00:56:15,320
Speaker 1: and you work for a year and go about business

936
00:56:15,360 --> 00:56:20,279
Speaker 1: and there's a passage like that. So I think that

937
00:56:20,280 --> 00:56:22,480
Speaker 1: that's the first thing, is like, you really need to

938
00:56:22,520 --> 00:56:26,200
Speaker 1: make sure that you're spending time in the Word and

939
00:56:26,719 --> 00:56:29,799
Speaker 1: just in solitude and praying God. I want to be

940
00:56:29,840 --> 00:56:32,960
Speaker 1: obedient to you. I know that you have the best

941
00:56:33,680 --> 00:56:36,680
Speaker 1: for my life, and so I'm submitting my own will

942
00:56:38,040 --> 00:56:39,880
Speaker 1: to you and saying like, could you guide me in

943
00:56:39,880 --> 00:56:41,839
Speaker 1: the way I need to go? Because if that is

944
00:56:41,920 --> 00:56:47,920
Speaker 1: into law enforcement, then I think you don't just dismiss

945
00:56:47,960 --> 00:56:50,759
Speaker 1: the conversations you're having with people that you trust that

946
00:56:50,800 --> 00:56:53,239
Speaker 1: are saying you shouldn't do it. But I think you

947
00:56:53,440 --> 00:56:57,640
Speaker 1: enter into those conversations with the question of, well, why

948
00:56:58,360 --> 00:57:01,600
Speaker 1: why is this something that you're encouraging me not to do?

949
00:57:02,080 --> 00:57:05,799
Speaker 1: Is it because of their own fear? Because that, if

950
00:57:05,800 --> 00:57:08,360
Speaker 1: you go back to God's word again, is not founded.

951
00:57:08,440 --> 00:57:11,880
Speaker 1: That's not wise counsel. Even with the people you're seeking

952
00:57:12,000 --> 00:57:15,959
Speaker 1: the wise counsel comes from. Is it based in God's word?

953
00:57:16,560 --> 00:57:20,560
Speaker 1: They're supposed to be pointing you back to that. But

954
00:57:20,680 --> 00:57:23,520
Speaker 1: if they're in their own insecurity and their own fear,

955
00:57:24,880 --> 00:57:27,360
Speaker 1: what you want to do may sound crazy, and they're

956
00:57:27,360 --> 00:57:29,120
Speaker 1: going to try to convince you not to do it.

957
00:57:30,560 --> 00:57:33,480
Speaker 1: But if you feel like God's word is affirming that,

958
00:57:34,160 --> 00:57:36,360
Speaker 1: and you feel like you do have people, once you've

959
00:57:36,360 --> 00:57:39,320
Speaker 1: been able to communicate what God is doing leading you to,

960
00:57:40,360 --> 00:57:44,200
Speaker 1: then I don't care what this world looks like. Do

961
00:57:44,440 --> 00:57:50,480
Speaker 1: not stop so good man. There are so many instances.

962
00:57:50,760 --> 00:57:52,920
Speaker 1: And the reason Megan I got to say, and for

963
00:57:52,960 --> 00:57:55,080
Speaker 1: everyone else's and the reason we keep going God's word,

964
00:57:55,120 --> 00:57:57,320
Speaker 1: God Word, God Word, is because that's what that's part

965
00:57:57,320 --> 00:58:00,280
Speaker 1: of what you're asking, and that's how burning are just

966
00:58:00,280 --> 00:58:04,560
Speaker 1: going to base our foundational answers on. There's so many

967
00:58:04,600 --> 00:58:07,520
Speaker 1: stories in the Bible when someone was called to do

968
00:58:07,560 --> 00:58:11,520
Speaker 1: something and the world went against them and said you

969
00:58:11,520 --> 00:58:13,760
Speaker 1: shouldn't do this, you shouldn't do this, you shouldn't do this.

970
00:58:14,960 --> 00:58:20,160
Speaker 1: So I'm gonna say something here, and Megan, I love you,

971
00:58:19,720 --> 00:58:22,840
Speaker 1: I think your heart is in the right place, but

972
00:58:22,880 --> 00:58:25,400
Speaker 1: I'm going to say something that might sound a little insulting.

973
00:58:27,520 --> 00:58:31,720
Speaker 1: I think I think you're you are making God smaller

974
00:58:31,760 --> 00:58:35,360
Speaker 1: than he is. I think, and I don't mean that

975
00:58:35,400 --> 00:58:39,640
Speaker 1: in insulting to you. I think your worldview of this

976
00:58:39,680 --> 00:58:43,520
Speaker 1: whole situation is making a little, tiny God, a little

977
00:58:43,560 --> 00:58:47,280
Speaker 1: insecure God that's not strong enough to make his will

978
00:58:47,280 --> 00:58:49,720
Speaker 1: clear enough for you. So you want to go to

979
00:58:49,760 --> 00:58:51,520
Speaker 1: a lot of other people. You want to write into

980
00:58:51,520 --> 00:58:53,400
Speaker 1: this podcast, which I'm glad you did, because this is

981
00:58:53,440 --> 00:58:55,760
Speaker 1: what I'm going to tell you. Don't put God in

982
00:58:55,800 --> 00:58:59,840
Speaker 1: a box, don't make him smaller. He is huge. He

983
00:59:00,080 --> 00:59:03,480
Speaker 1: can move mountains, he could part seize. He is in

984
00:59:03,520 --> 00:59:06,560
Speaker 1: control of everything. He is in control of every detail

985
00:59:06,560 --> 00:59:09,200
Speaker 1: of your life. He knows every hair on your head.

986
00:59:09,240 --> 00:59:11,680
Speaker 1: He numbers the hairs on your head. Is what he

987
00:59:11,720 --> 00:59:19,240
Speaker 1: has said. Therefore, if you are praying diligently like you are,

988
00:59:19,320 --> 00:59:22,600
Speaker 1: for Him to open and close doors accordingly, then don't

989
00:59:22,920 --> 00:59:26,360
Speaker 1: keep doubting the path you're on. If the doors are

990
00:59:26,400 --> 00:59:29,280
Speaker 1: open and you're walking through them, clearly, you are walking

991
00:59:29,320 --> 00:59:32,000
Speaker 1: through the doors that He has opened, and you are

992
00:59:32,160 --> 00:59:35,440
Speaker 1: doubting these doors. It's normal to doubt. I doubt. Bernie

993
00:59:35,480 --> 00:59:39,720
Speaker 1: doubts every character in the Bible, Noah, Moses, everyone has doubted.

994
00:59:40,040 --> 00:59:44,080
Speaker 1: Go read Exodus and talk about and read how God

995
00:59:44,200 --> 00:59:49,440
Speaker 1: was telling Moses to go into Egypt and command to

996
00:59:49,480 --> 00:59:53,160
Speaker 1: Pharaoh to let his people go, and Moses Goesugh me

997
00:59:53,600 --> 00:59:56,440
Speaker 1: I do. I don't. I can't do that. Not a

998
00:59:56,480 --> 00:59:59,160
Speaker 1: good speaker, I can't talk in God's said who made

999
00:59:59,160 --> 01:00:04,320
Speaker 1: your mouth? Who made your mouth? And he said, you

1000
01:00:04,440 --> 01:00:07,160
Speaker 1: just send somebody else. I'm just not good at this stuff.

1001
01:00:07,440 --> 01:00:09,920
Speaker 1: That's normal for you to think that, Megan. But it

1002
01:00:09,920 --> 01:00:12,360
Speaker 1: sounds like God is opening the doors to law enforcement

1003
01:00:12,840 --> 01:00:16,080
Speaker 1: and you're walking through them and questioning all the way

1004
01:00:16,080 --> 01:00:18,960
Speaker 1: through that this is maybe not God's will when he's

1005
01:00:19,120 --> 01:00:22,000
Speaker 1: clearly oh, because hey, this is what I mean by

1006
01:00:22,000 --> 01:00:23,800
Speaker 1: don't make him a small God. When you ask him

1007
01:00:23,840 --> 01:00:26,280
Speaker 1: to close the door, He's going to close the door.

1008
01:00:27,560 --> 01:00:33,120
Speaker 1: If you're trusting him, he will close the door. So

1009
01:00:34,000 --> 01:00:36,320
Speaker 1: I'm not talking about he's going to close it because

1010
01:00:36,400 --> 01:00:38,480
Speaker 1: a friend's going to call and go, Heck, Megan, have

1011
01:00:38,520 --> 01:00:40,960
Speaker 1: a bad feeling about this. I'm kind of scared of it.

1012
01:00:41,000 --> 01:00:42,480
Speaker 1: I don't think you should do it. And I know

1013
01:00:42,560 --> 01:00:44,919
Speaker 1: a lot about law enforcement. That's not a closed door.

1014
01:00:45,640 --> 01:00:47,760
Speaker 1: That's exactly what Bernie is saying. You say, well, let

1015
01:00:47,800 --> 01:00:50,680
Speaker 1: me talk to you a little bit. What you're reasoning

1016
01:00:51,520 --> 01:00:54,560
Speaker 1: a closed door is you go in and you get

1017
01:00:54,560 --> 01:00:57,720
Speaker 1: a test result back from your physical going into the

1018
01:00:57,760 --> 01:01:00,240
Speaker 1: police department and they say, hey, you have a blood

1019
01:01:00,240 --> 01:01:03,880
Speaker 1: clot and we can't accept you into the force because

1020
01:01:03,880 --> 01:01:09,800
Speaker 1: you're that's close, you know. But you walk this path, Megan,

1021
01:01:10,240 --> 01:01:13,480
Speaker 1: with a vengeance, knowing that you are on God's side,

1022
01:01:13,480 --> 01:01:15,160
Speaker 1: because you are a child of God and you have

1023
01:01:15,280 --> 01:01:18,439
Speaker 1: prayed to him, and you are walking according to his will,

1024
01:01:18,480 --> 01:01:23,400
Speaker 1: because because Paul says and his epistle in his letter,

1025
01:01:23,480 --> 01:01:30,640
Speaker 1: he says that we need to transform our minds. Therefore,

1026
01:01:30,680 --> 01:01:33,000
Speaker 1: to discern the will of God through our minds, not

1027
01:01:33,080 --> 01:01:35,840
Speaker 1: through our hearts or our feelings or everyone around us,

1028
01:01:35,920 --> 01:01:38,360
Speaker 1: or the what the world's telling our minds. And you

1029
01:01:39,080 --> 01:01:42,560
Speaker 1: are looking clearly at this job as a police officer.

1030
01:01:42,600 --> 01:01:45,480
Speaker 1: You even said in your note, I'm aware using your

1031
01:01:45,520 --> 01:01:48,200
Speaker 1: mind the law enforcement is a really gnarly career path.

1032
01:01:48,280 --> 01:01:51,280
Speaker 1: But I understand that's a mind thing. That's not a

1033
01:01:51,280 --> 01:01:54,720
Speaker 1: heart thing. It's not a feeling thing. I understand how

1034
01:01:54,760 --> 01:01:58,600
Speaker 1: many sacrifices must be made. You have decided with your mind,

1035
01:01:58,840 --> 01:02:01,280
Speaker 1: you have transformed your mind and according to the will

1036
01:02:01,320 --> 01:02:04,040
Speaker 1: of God. You are discerning now the path that you're on,

1037
01:02:04,720 --> 01:02:06,840
Speaker 1: and you need to walk through these doors that are open,

1038
01:02:07,240 --> 01:02:09,320
Speaker 1: and if they close, that's a different story. But you're

1039
01:02:09,320 --> 01:02:13,040
Speaker 1: gonna know don't make him small, don't make him don't

1040
01:02:13,240 --> 01:02:16,120
Speaker 1: don't think that he's just giving you little nudges in

1041
01:02:16,160 --> 01:02:21,080
Speaker 1: the sky. He is. He is controlling your steps here.

1042
01:02:21,200 --> 01:02:24,120
Speaker 1: So go for it, Megan. I think it is. It

1043
01:02:24,160 --> 01:02:28,040
Speaker 1: is brave of you. I think it is is valiant

1044
01:02:28,040 --> 01:02:30,320
Speaker 1: of you. I think you are. You're stepping into law

1045
01:02:30,400 --> 01:02:32,560
Speaker 1: enforcement in a time when everyone is running from it.

1046
01:02:32,560 --> 01:02:36,280
Speaker 1: In Washington State, everyone is running from law enforcement. They're

1047
01:02:36,560 --> 01:02:39,440
Speaker 1: they're either going to a different state or a different

1048
01:02:39,760 --> 01:02:43,600
Speaker 1: easier career path, or they're switching jobs. And you're going

1049
01:02:43,800 --> 01:02:46,160
Speaker 1: into the fire in a time when everyone's going out

1050
01:02:46,200 --> 01:02:48,520
Speaker 1: of it. And I love you for that. I admire

1051
01:02:48,560 --> 01:02:51,520
Speaker 1: you for that, and don't let people discourage you. Yeah. No,

1052
01:02:51,680 --> 01:02:56,960
Speaker 1: that's great, preach son. The verse that he's referencing is

1053
01:02:57,000 --> 01:03:00,120
Speaker 1: Romans twelfth two. So go back and read that. The

1054
01:03:00,120 --> 01:03:04,560
Speaker 1: first part of that says, do not conform any longer

1055
01:03:04,600 --> 01:03:08,960
Speaker 1: to the pattern of this world. Instead, be transformed by

1056
01:03:08,960 --> 01:03:13,360
Speaker 1: a renewal of your mind. Okay, so remember that first part,

1057
01:03:14,360 --> 01:03:17,640
Speaker 1: do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world.

1058
01:03:17,880 --> 01:03:22,320
Speaker 1: So this world, the pattern is, this is hard, this

1059
01:03:22,400 --> 01:03:27,280
Speaker 1: is unsafe, this is politically this way or that way,

1060
01:03:27,760 --> 01:03:31,280
Speaker 1: so I should probably not do it. That's what the

1061
01:03:31,320 --> 01:03:33,680
Speaker 1: world is saying. And this is not just about law enforcement.

1062
01:03:33,800 --> 01:03:37,120
Speaker 1: This is about these days a lot of different things.

1063
01:03:37,960 --> 01:03:40,800
Speaker 1: So you can either choose to she said current state

1064
01:03:40,840 --> 01:03:43,800
Speaker 1: of the world, even reference world current state of the world.

1065
01:03:44,040 --> 01:03:47,000
Speaker 1: So what the world is kind of like preaching to

1066
01:03:47,080 --> 01:03:55,480
Speaker 1: us is, hey, don't put yourself in a harm's way

1067
01:03:55,560 --> 01:04:00,320
Speaker 1: because of a calling that God has placed on you.

1068
01:04:01,960 --> 01:04:06,320
Speaker 1: And again this I know you guys listening out there

1069
01:04:06,760 --> 01:04:11,120
Speaker 1: may be involved in a different career path where your integrity,

1070
01:04:11,520 --> 01:04:18,080
Speaker 1: your reputation, your safety, your life is being put and

1071
01:04:18,240 --> 01:04:23,840
Speaker 1: in harm's way. But God says, hey, don't conform to

1072
01:04:23,920 --> 01:04:28,320
Speaker 1: what the world is doing and what they're telling you.

1073
01:04:29,120 --> 01:04:31,440
Speaker 1: Be transformed by a renewal of your mind. And I

1074
01:04:31,480 --> 01:04:34,160
Speaker 1: think what that is going to tell us is that no,

1075
01:04:34,600 --> 01:04:40,160
Speaker 1: just like throughout the Bible, God has led me into

1076
01:04:40,240 --> 01:04:43,720
Speaker 1: this battle. He's going to give me the armor and

1077
01:04:43,760 --> 01:04:48,200
Speaker 1: the tools that I need when I need them. I'm

1078
01:04:48,280 --> 01:04:52,000
Speaker 1: walking with the King of victory. I have to hold

1079
01:04:52,040 --> 01:04:55,520
Speaker 1: on to that. That's my hope. My dad was in

1080
01:04:55,600 --> 01:04:58,760
Speaker 1: law enforcement for thirty five years, so this is definitely

1081
01:04:58,800 --> 01:05:02,440
Speaker 1: something that's close to me and to see you know,

1082
01:05:02,560 --> 01:05:09,800
Speaker 1: guys like my dad that de escalated. We're humble, We're

1083
01:05:11,120 --> 01:05:15,360
Speaker 1: there to serve and protect, We're loving. And I know

1084
01:05:15,520 --> 01:05:18,440
Speaker 1: there's a picture that the enemy and that the world

1085
01:05:18,480 --> 01:05:23,280
Speaker 1: wants to paint of the majority of law enforcement so

1086
01:05:23,320 --> 01:05:26,520
Speaker 1: that these polar opposites can keep fighting. But it's like, look,

1087
01:05:26,560 --> 01:05:30,240
Speaker 1: the majority of us are in the middle. We're very

1088
01:05:30,400 --> 01:05:34,680
Speaker 1: very close on a lot of these issues. But these

1089
01:05:34,720 --> 01:05:38,360
Speaker 1: people on other sides are much louder voices. So I'm

1090
01:05:38,360 --> 01:05:40,439
Speaker 1: gonna tell you, don't listen to the voices. Don't listen

1091
01:05:40,480 --> 01:05:45,760
Speaker 1: to the worldly voices. Listen to the voice of God.

1092
01:05:46,720 --> 01:05:51,200
Speaker 1: Seek wise counsel. That's right, totally different. Sit with it,

1093
01:05:52,760 --> 01:05:56,080
Speaker 1: wrestle with it, talk with them. And this is not

1094
01:05:56,160 --> 01:05:59,080
Speaker 1: just for Megan, This is for me Griz. This is

1095
01:05:59,120 --> 01:06:01,080
Speaker 1: what we guys, This is life. This is what we

1096
01:06:01,120 --> 01:06:03,400
Speaker 1: do when these things come up. And we do live

1097
01:06:03,440 --> 01:06:08,640
Speaker 1: in a world where we can't pretend that these issues

1098
01:06:09,400 --> 01:06:11,680
Speaker 1: and that our world is not right in front of

1099
01:06:11,720 --> 01:06:15,160
Speaker 1: our face now and that it's not much louder than

1100
01:06:15,160 --> 01:06:18,400
Speaker 1: it used to be. It is in our ear louder

1101
01:06:18,440 --> 01:06:22,480
Speaker 1: than ever. But I think that we just have to

1102
01:06:22,560 --> 01:06:24,720
Speaker 1: quiet those voices. We have to listen to the voice

1103
01:06:24,720 --> 01:06:26,160
Speaker 1: of God, and that can be through His word, that

1104
01:06:26,160 --> 01:06:29,000
Speaker 1: can be through the community of the church. We have

1105
01:06:29,040 --> 01:06:31,040
Speaker 1: to listen to that voice and be still with it,

1106
01:06:31,400 --> 01:06:34,160
Speaker 1: and then just go boldly and courageously into what you're

1107
01:06:34,200 --> 01:06:38,680
Speaker 1: supposed to do. You think God doesn't want his warriors

1108
01:06:38,720 --> 01:06:42,479
Speaker 1: in Seattle, Washington in law enforcement. Of course he does.

1109
01:06:43,200 --> 01:06:45,320
Speaker 1: They have to be. He is calling you to this,

1110
01:06:45,720 --> 01:06:50,280
Speaker 1: I believe. How do I know because you have You're

1111
01:06:50,400 --> 01:06:53,960
Speaker 1: graduating with a bachelor's degree in emergency management homeland security.

1112
01:06:54,000 --> 01:06:55,840
Speaker 1: You've been in this for a long time. You said,

1113
01:06:55,880 --> 01:06:59,480
Speaker 1: it has been my dream. You put all caps dream,

1114
01:06:59,840 --> 01:07:03,840
Speaker 1: all caps to be a police officer, and now the

1115
01:07:03,840 --> 01:07:07,000
Speaker 1: world is telling you pumped the brakes. Well, here's the key,

1116
01:07:07,080 --> 01:07:09,640
Speaker 1: here's the kicker to all this. You said, I have

1117
01:07:09,680 --> 01:07:13,760
Speaker 1: prayed about this decision. Done, done, put a period on that.

1118
01:07:14,280 --> 01:07:16,720
Speaker 1: You are walking with the Lord here, and He is

1119
01:07:17,240 --> 01:07:20,120
Speaker 1: preparing your steps for you. He has created this passion.

1120
01:07:20,480 --> 01:07:22,600
Speaker 1: He created where do you think that dream came from?

1121
01:07:22,920 --> 01:07:25,440
Speaker 1: He lit that fire in you. So your prayer is this,

1122
01:07:25,960 --> 01:07:30,200
Speaker 1: It's God, here we go. It's getting real. I'm walking

1123
01:07:30,520 --> 01:07:33,040
Speaker 1: down this path that you have you have laid out

1124
01:07:33,080 --> 01:07:36,200
Speaker 1: for me. Now, I have a lot of people telling

1125
01:07:36,240 --> 01:07:37,560
Speaker 1: me that I shouldn't do this. I have a lot

1126
01:07:37,560 --> 01:07:40,200
Speaker 1: of people that are scared for me, scared for my life,

1127
01:07:40,760 --> 01:07:44,000
Speaker 1: scared for the future of law enforcement in Seattle, Washington.

1128
01:07:44,400 --> 01:07:47,000
Speaker 1: But I'm walking this because you have The path is

1129
01:07:47,040 --> 01:07:49,520
Speaker 1: still open. So here we go, step by step. I

1130
01:07:49,520 --> 01:07:53,600
Speaker 1: have testing coming up in October, So here we go. God,

1131
01:07:53,640 --> 01:07:55,320
Speaker 1: if this is not right for me, close the store.

1132
01:07:55,320 --> 01:07:58,760
Speaker 1: If it's open, I'm walking into testing. I'm going into testing,

1133
01:07:58,880 --> 01:08:01,400
Speaker 1: and I'm gonna do this and until you stop me,

1134
01:08:01,880 --> 01:08:06,800
Speaker 1: I'm going this direction that's open and closed door. Yep.

1135
01:08:06,960 --> 01:08:09,120
Speaker 1: And that's a closed story for you. Thank you, Megan

1136
01:08:09,160 --> 01:08:15,000
Speaker 1: for your service. I love this. Yeah, it's great. Because

1137
01:08:15,000 --> 01:08:18,360
Speaker 1: of our computer failure, it has given us an opportunity

1138
01:08:18,360 --> 01:08:21,080
Speaker 1: for one more question. Oh okay, So for anyone who

1139
01:08:21,280 --> 01:08:23,559
Speaker 1: you dug through the bad audio of the dad question,

1140
01:08:24,800 --> 01:08:26,280
Speaker 1: we're going a little bit. We're going to give a

1141
01:08:26,320 --> 01:08:28,920
Speaker 1: little bit longer on this podcast now and go to

1142
01:08:28,920 --> 01:08:32,559
Speaker 1: one more so, Burns, We've got question for the podcast.

1143
01:08:32,600 --> 01:08:37,040
Speaker 1: I need some advice promotion, alcoholic veteran needs help. Question.

1144
01:08:37,080 --> 01:08:40,439
Speaker 1: Please read all caps, Faith and Friends fan reactions and

1145
01:08:40,479 --> 01:08:50,320
Speaker 1: playing overseas Man. We need to get a wheel where

1146
01:08:50,360 --> 01:08:52,640
Speaker 1: we just like spit and it's like, okay, this is

1147
01:08:52,680 --> 01:08:54,720
Speaker 1: the one we're doing. Okay. What I don't want this

1148
01:08:54,800 --> 01:08:56,920
Speaker 1: to become is I don't want people to think they

1149
01:08:56,960 --> 01:08:59,559
Speaker 1: got to make the most creative subject ever. That's why

1150
01:08:59,560 --> 01:09:01,840
Speaker 1: I kind of don't like, well, let's go with podcast question.

1151
01:09:02,040 --> 01:09:06,559
Speaker 1: Boom you know, there you go. That's how you counteract that, right, yep, Okay,

1152
01:09:06,680 --> 01:09:09,120
Speaker 1: It says, hey, grand your my name is Andrew. I'm

1153
01:09:09,120 --> 01:09:12,800
Speaker 1: from Ontario, Canada. I'm a senior in high school. I

1154
01:09:12,840 --> 01:09:14,519
Speaker 1: have a ton of questions I'd like to ask, but

1155
01:09:14,560 --> 01:09:17,719
Speaker 1: my number one is what is the number one life

1156
01:09:17,760 --> 01:09:20,719
Speaker 1: advice you'd give to someone someone who has not found

1157
01:09:20,960 --> 01:09:24,280
Speaker 1: themselves yet or is in the process of doing so.

1158
01:09:25,880 --> 01:09:31,960
Speaker 1: Ye ye, Andrew is asking the question. He's asking the questions.

1159
01:09:33,000 --> 01:09:35,720
Speaker 1: Read it one more time. This says, my number one

1160
01:09:35,800 --> 01:09:39,840
Speaker 1: question is what is the life advice you'd give to

1161
01:09:39,880 --> 01:09:48,880
Speaker 1: someone who hasn't found themselves yet? Welcome? No, that's so good.

1162
01:09:53,560 --> 01:09:57,200
Speaker 1: It's a journey we're all on and welcome. Don't give up.

1163
01:09:59,400 --> 01:10:02,400
Speaker 1: That's the end of the Just kidding, dude, that's good.

1164
01:10:02,880 --> 01:10:06,519
Speaker 1: That's good. Yeah, what I see here is senior in

1165
01:10:06,600 --> 01:10:09,840
Speaker 1: high school, Bro, I didn't know myself. I did, I

1166
01:10:09,880 --> 01:10:13,000
Speaker 1: just didn't. Was I searching, of course I was. You

1167
01:10:13,080 --> 01:10:16,519
Speaker 1: better believe I was. I was searching. I was asking questions.

1168
01:10:16,560 --> 01:10:20,800
Speaker 1: I was in the process of finding myself. But it

1169
01:10:20,880 --> 01:10:23,960
Speaker 1: is possible to find yourself who you are in high school.

1170
01:10:23,960 --> 01:10:26,360
Speaker 1: But I wasn't one of them. That wasn't either. I

1171
01:10:26,360 --> 01:10:30,280
Speaker 1: don't think a lot of people are capable of being eighteen, nineteen,

1172
01:10:30,400 --> 01:10:34,519
Speaker 1: seventeen years old whatever you are and going you know what.

1173
01:10:34,600 --> 01:10:36,799
Speaker 1: I know exactly who I am, and I'm a rocket.

1174
01:10:36,840 --> 01:10:40,479
Speaker 1: I found myself. Yeah, it takes life experience. So that's

1175
01:10:40,479 --> 01:10:43,960
Speaker 1: the advice. Get out and experience life. Things that you

1176
01:10:44,000 --> 01:10:49,320
Speaker 1: just are uncomfortable with, things you don't understand. Go be curious,

1177
01:10:49,360 --> 01:10:52,840
Speaker 1: Go adventure, go journey, go like because that's going to

1178
01:10:52,920 --> 01:10:56,800
Speaker 1: help you. When you get outside of yourself and what

1179
01:10:56,840 --> 01:10:58,760
Speaker 1: you know, you're gonna be able to look back at

1180
01:10:58,800 --> 01:11:02,720
Speaker 1: it and be like, oh, that's that. Oh I like that,

1181
01:11:02,720 --> 01:11:06,120
Speaker 1: that's that's me, and that and that's me too. You're

1182
01:11:06,160 --> 01:11:11,080
Speaker 1: gonna you're gonna start to build that in. Traveling helps

1183
01:11:11,240 --> 01:11:13,800
Speaker 1: traveling Yet, I know I know that, especially these days,

1184
01:11:13,800 --> 01:11:16,920
Speaker 1: traveling is expensive, but you can grab a backpack and

1185
01:11:16,960 --> 01:11:20,240
Speaker 1: there's probably a lot of websites. You're in Ontario. If

1186
01:11:20,240 --> 01:11:22,679
Speaker 1: you haven't been to the US yet, maybe maybe that's

1187
01:11:22,720 --> 01:11:25,360
Speaker 1: something you could do, is head to the US and

1188
01:11:25,560 --> 01:11:28,000
Speaker 1: take a backpacking trip. Maybe jump on some trains that

1189
01:11:28,040 --> 01:11:30,839
Speaker 1: they have in on the East coast and see Philly

1190
01:11:30,880 --> 01:11:35,960
Speaker 1: and New York and Baltimore and d C. And cruise

1191
01:11:36,040 --> 01:11:38,639
Speaker 1: up and down the coast a little bit. Uh. If

1192
01:11:38,680 --> 01:11:41,080
Speaker 1: you haven't seen the rest of Canada, you could find

1193
01:11:41,080 --> 01:11:44,000
Speaker 1: out a lot about yourself by going into a different culture,

1194
01:11:44,040 --> 01:11:46,760
Speaker 1: like Bernie said, and flipping the script on what is

1195
01:11:46,800 --> 01:11:53,920
Speaker 1: normal and trying something new. Muh. I feel like I

1196
01:11:53,960 --> 01:11:55,720
Speaker 1: don't know if I like I said, I don't know

1197
01:11:55,720 --> 01:11:59,200
Speaker 1: if I've found myself. I have a lot more uh

1198
01:11:59,439 --> 01:12:03,880
Speaker 1: security and my identity where my identity is found, and

1199
01:12:04,320 --> 01:12:09,880
Speaker 1: you know, just life experience. But would you say that

1200
01:12:10,040 --> 01:12:14,960
Speaker 1: you typically find those things when you're not looking for them. Yeah. Yeah.

1201
01:12:15,000 --> 01:12:17,000
Speaker 1: And what's interesting is I was thinking, me and you

1202
01:12:18,000 --> 01:12:21,040
Speaker 1: did the same thing that as at Andrew's age, Me

1203
01:12:21,040 --> 01:12:23,559
Speaker 1: and you did the same thing. We both moved to Nashville, Tennessee,

1204
01:12:24,520 --> 01:12:28,559
Speaker 1: which was a yeah, music related, dream related, I get it.

1205
01:12:28,560 --> 01:12:31,320
Speaker 1: But there was way more to it than that. It

1206
01:12:31,400 --> 01:12:34,599
Speaker 1: was getting out of our home state you were coming from,

1207
01:12:34,640 --> 01:12:39,760
Speaker 1: actually Atlanta. It's getting out of our home state and

1208
01:12:39,800 --> 01:12:43,960
Speaker 1: flipping the script and stripping away everything. It's not like

1209
01:12:44,000 --> 01:12:46,360
Speaker 1: we were meaning to do that, but that's what we

1210
01:12:46,400 --> 01:12:51,080
Speaker 1: did in a roundabout way. I went to Nashville. I

1211
01:12:51,479 --> 01:12:55,639
Speaker 1: got away from every comfort I had, every friend, I had,

1212
01:12:56,080 --> 01:13:00,519
Speaker 1: every piece of income that I had, and flipped script

1213
01:13:01,120 --> 01:13:03,920
Speaker 1: and tried something new. And guess what happened. It took

1214
01:13:04,000 --> 01:13:07,240
Speaker 1: me four years living there. But when I moved back

1215
01:13:07,280 --> 01:13:10,799
Speaker 1: to Texas after those four years, I was a different person.

1216
01:13:11,640 --> 01:13:13,280
Speaker 1: I don't know if I would if I could say

1217
01:13:13,320 --> 01:13:15,880
Speaker 1: I found myself, but I found myself a lot more

1218
01:13:15,880 --> 01:13:19,320
Speaker 1: than I did when I first moved to Tennessee. And

1219
01:13:19,800 --> 01:13:22,960
Speaker 1: traveling will do that. New cultures, meeting new kinds of

1220
01:13:23,000 --> 01:13:25,320
Speaker 1: people that don't sound the same or address the same

1221
01:13:25,360 --> 01:13:28,000
Speaker 1: as you do. It's a good way to you could

1222
01:13:28,040 --> 01:13:30,880
Speaker 1: you could find out quickly if the way of life

1223
01:13:30,880 --> 01:13:35,720
Speaker 1: you've been living is the right way, or maybe you

1224
01:13:35,760 --> 01:13:38,800
Speaker 1: were thinking backwards, but you could figure that out by

1225
01:13:38,840 --> 01:13:42,280
Speaker 1: just seeing new people working a new job, like Bernie said,

1226
01:13:42,320 --> 01:13:46,920
Speaker 1: trying a new craft, a new skill. The reason. I

1227
01:13:46,960 --> 01:13:50,760
Speaker 1: think society has set itself up in the perfect way

1228
01:13:52,120 --> 01:13:55,880
Speaker 1: through God. If you're a believer that you're a senior

1229
01:13:55,920 --> 01:13:59,599
Speaker 1: in high school, and it's like that is the age

1230
01:14:00,280 --> 01:14:03,320
Speaker 1: when you're supposed to leave the nest and get out

1231
01:14:03,360 --> 01:14:05,920
Speaker 1: of your comfort zone, which is about seventeen, eighteen, nineteen

1232
01:14:06,000 --> 01:14:09,599
Speaker 1: twenty years old. Right around there is the time when

1233
01:14:09,920 --> 01:14:13,639
Speaker 1: you're supposed to leave and leave your mom and dad,

1234
01:14:13,920 --> 01:14:16,800
Speaker 1: or your dad, your aunt wherever you're living. I don't know.

1235
01:14:17,000 --> 01:14:19,960
Speaker 1: You're supposed to leave that nest and try to fly

1236
01:14:21,320 --> 01:14:24,000
Speaker 1: and fall and get back up and try to fly again.

1237
01:14:24,560 --> 01:14:27,120
Speaker 1: That's the age. You don't do that any earlier. You're

1238
01:14:27,160 --> 01:14:29,080
Speaker 1: not supposed to. Really you can, you're not supposed to,

1239
01:14:29,479 --> 01:14:32,280
Speaker 1: and you're not supposed to do it any later. This

1240
01:14:32,439 --> 01:14:36,839
Speaker 1: damage on both sides. Our society has learned through hundreds

1241
01:14:36,880 --> 01:14:40,559
Speaker 1: and hundreds of years that when a boy turns eighteen,

1242
01:14:40,800 --> 01:14:44,439
Speaker 1: get out of the nest and try to fly, Andrew,

1243
01:14:44,439 --> 01:14:48,439
Speaker 1: that's when you figure out who you are. Is when

1244
01:14:48,439 --> 01:14:51,280
Speaker 1: you first spread your wings out of your nest. So

1245
01:14:52,520 --> 01:14:56,519
Speaker 1: the answer is you're doing You're asking the right question,

1246
01:14:56,840 --> 01:14:59,559
Speaker 1: and you're welcome to the club. It is like Bernie said,

1247
01:14:59,560 --> 01:15:03,080
Speaker 1: the very big welcome, Welcome. You're eighteen, you haven't found yourself.

1248
01:15:03,680 --> 01:15:06,880
Speaker 1: You're right on track, good job, doing the exact thing

1249
01:15:06,880 --> 01:15:09,599
Speaker 1: you need to be doing. And one day, when you're

1250
01:15:10,320 --> 01:15:13,519
Speaker 1: my age and Bernie's age, you'll look back and go, yeah, yeah,

1251
01:15:13,760 --> 01:15:18,880
Speaker 1: I found myself. Now I found it and you will too.

1252
01:15:20,840 --> 01:15:23,639
Speaker 1: Ye yee yee yee dude, thanks for being here. Good

1253
01:15:23,640 --> 01:15:25,800
Speaker 1: stuff as always. Thank you guys. Y'all are the best.

1254
01:15:25,960 --> 01:15:29,559
Speaker 1: Y'all are awesome. Keep bringing the good questions boom ye

1255
01:15:29,640 --> 01:15:32,559
Speaker 1: yee see you. Thanks for joining me on the Granger

1256
01:15:32,600 --> 01:15:35,679
Speaker 1: Smith Podcast. I appreciate all of you guys. You could

1257
01:15:35,680 --> 01:15:38,760
Speaker 1: help me out by rating this podcast on iTunes. If

1258
01:15:38,800 --> 01:15:42,000
Speaker 1: you're on YouTube, subscribe to this channel, hit that little

1259
01:15:42,200 --> 01:15:45,519
Speaker 1: like button and notification spell so that you never miss

1260
01:15:45,640 --> 01:15:49,000
Speaker 1: anytime I upload a video. If you have a question

1261
01:15:49,040 --> 01:15:51,479
Speaker 1: for me that you would like me to answer, email

1262
01:15:51,640 --> 01:15:55,960
Speaker 1: Graingersmith Podcast at gmail dot com. Ye ye