1 00:00:03,000 --> 00:00:07,400 Speaker 1: Welcome to Before Breakfast, a production of iHeartRadio. 2 00:00:08,800 --> 00:00:14,320 Speaker 2: Good Morning, This is Laura. Welcome to the Before Breakfast podcast. 3 00:00:15,480 --> 00:00:21,239 Speaker 2: Today's tip is to become a confident conversationalist. If you 4 00:00:21,320 --> 00:00:25,759 Speaker 2: feel shy or awkward striking up conversations or chatting with colleagues, 5 00:00:26,600 --> 00:00:29,560 Speaker 2: let this be the year when you build your skills 6 00:00:29,800 --> 00:00:35,159 Speaker 2: so you can feel great about your interactions. During my 7 00:00:35,280 --> 00:00:39,440 Speaker 2: recent Better Workday challenge, lots of participants mentioned that they 8 00:00:39,479 --> 00:00:44,680 Speaker 2: sometimes felt uncomfortable striking up conversations with their colleagues. It 9 00:00:44,720 --> 00:00:48,960 Speaker 2: felt easier to just keep their heads down and communicate electronically. 10 00:00:50,120 --> 00:00:52,840 Speaker 2: So if you feel a little self conscious about chitchat, 11 00:00:53,560 --> 00:00:57,440 Speaker 2: know that you are not alone. But if you are 12 00:00:57,480 --> 00:01:00,920 Speaker 2: not developing relationships with people at work, I'd be missing out. 13 00:01:01,880 --> 00:01:04,480 Speaker 2: Connecting with your colleagues can make you more effective at 14 00:01:04,520 --> 00:01:07,480 Speaker 2: your job, and it can also help you feel happier 15 00:01:07,480 --> 00:01:11,400 Speaker 2: and more comfortable at work. So if you are feeling 16 00:01:11,720 --> 00:01:16,640 Speaker 2: uncomfortable or shy about connecting, here are some tips. First, 17 00:01:17,319 --> 00:01:23,760 Speaker 2: friendly questions are conversational openers. Asking someone something that invites 18 00:01:23,880 --> 00:01:29,000 Speaker 2: authentic sharing but isn't invasive is likely to start a 19 00:01:29,040 --> 00:01:36,200 Speaker 2: positive conversation, So always have some light questions ready. For instance, 20 00:01:36,240 --> 00:01:38,240 Speaker 2: on a Friday, you could ask people what they are 21 00:01:38,240 --> 00:01:41,840 Speaker 2: looking forward to over the weekend. On Monday, you could 22 00:01:41,880 --> 00:01:44,720 Speaker 2: ask if they did anything exciting or fun or memorable. 23 00:01:45,720 --> 00:01:49,120 Speaker 2: On any day, you could ask someone about their interests. 24 00:01:50,000 --> 00:01:52,520 Speaker 2: If you know your colleague likes to read, you could 25 00:01:52,520 --> 00:01:55,320 Speaker 2: ask her what she's reading now. If you know a 26 00:01:55,320 --> 00:01:57,480 Speaker 2: colleague likes to go out to restaurants with her daughter, 27 00:01:58,040 --> 00:02:01,360 Speaker 2: you could ask what they've tried recently. There's a reason 28 00:02:01,440 --> 00:02:05,560 Speaker 2: people bond over sports. There are lots of games, and 29 00:02:05,600 --> 00:02:09,720 Speaker 2: they always provide an opening for conversation. Did you see 30 00:02:09,720 --> 00:02:10,960 Speaker 2: the Grizzlies game last night? 31 00:02:11,560 --> 00:02:15,400 Speaker 1: That sort of thing. Of course, it's also helpful to 32 00:02:15,440 --> 00:02:18,680 Speaker 1: have something ready to share. If someone asks you what 33 00:02:18,720 --> 00:02:22,359 Speaker 1: you've been up to lately, aim to choose something positive, 34 00:02:23,280 --> 00:02:25,799 Speaker 1: even if you have been dealing with an insurance claim 35 00:02:25,880 --> 00:02:28,720 Speaker 1: for a tree that fell on your roof. Talking about 36 00:02:28,720 --> 00:02:32,520 Speaker 1: that probably won't lift either of your moods, though, if 37 00:02:32,560 --> 00:02:35,799 Speaker 1: you've got a funny anecdote about the process, you could 38 00:02:36,000 --> 00:02:40,040 Speaker 1: tell that. In addition to choosing a topic that's upbeat, 39 00:02:40,520 --> 00:02:43,320 Speaker 1: also aim for something that gives a window into what's 40 00:02:43,360 --> 00:02:47,240 Speaker 1: important to you, as in, I've been loving this mild 41 00:02:47,280 --> 00:02:51,480 Speaker 1: weather and I've gotten back into cycling lately. Or I'm 42 00:02:51,520 --> 00:02:54,520 Speaker 1: helping my neighbor get ready for her new baby. Last 43 00:02:54,560 --> 00:02:57,840 Speaker 1: weekend i helped her paint the nursery, or I've been 44 00:02:57,880 --> 00:03:00,000 Speaker 1: learning Spanish lately to get ready for a trip to 45 00:03:00,080 --> 00:03:03,760 Speaker 1: Buenos Aires this spring. This will give any colleague with 46 00:03:04,120 --> 00:03:08,400 Speaker 1: reasonable social skills an opening to ask you more about 47 00:03:08,400 --> 00:03:12,880 Speaker 1: these topics. As you both share what you are excited about, 48 00:03:13,600 --> 00:03:18,000 Speaker 1: you'll be sure to find common ground. In addition to 49 00:03:18,160 --> 00:03:21,680 Speaker 1: in person chitchat, also try to build in connection when 50 00:03:21,720 --> 00:03:25,800 Speaker 1: you're communicating across distance. One option could be sending a 51 00:03:25,840 --> 00:03:28,280 Speaker 1: message on za zoom call to a person who you 52 00:03:28,360 --> 00:03:32,280 Speaker 1: feel has a little bit of friend potential just notice things. 53 00:03:32,680 --> 00:03:35,840 Speaker 1: You could write something like I love that painting behind you. 54 00:03:36,440 --> 00:03:39,760 Speaker 1: Is there a story behind it? It can also be 55 00:03:39,800 --> 00:03:42,960 Speaker 1: good to include a sentence in emails that's more personal 56 00:03:43,360 --> 00:03:45,560 Speaker 1: before you get to the main business of the message, 57 00:03:46,000 --> 00:03:48,800 Speaker 1: so something like I hope you enjoyed the long weekend. 58 00:03:49,360 --> 00:03:51,720 Speaker 1: I was grateful for the extra time to plan my 59 00:03:51,800 --> 00:03:54,960 Speaker 1: garden this spring. You don't want to make your email 60 00:03:55,040 --> 00:03:59,840 Speaker 1: ridiculously long, but offering a little tidbit about yourself can 61 00:04:00,080 --> 00:04:05,520 Speaker 1: foster a greater sense of connection. If connecting with colleagues 62 00:04:05,560 --> 00:04:09,360 Speaker 1: still seems intimidating, you could seek out more structure and 63 00:04:09,400 --> 00:04:13,440 Speaker 1: guidance for your efforts to become a good conversationalist. Some 64 00:04:13,480 --> 00:04:16,960 Speaker 1: people find it helpful to participate in toast Masters or 65 00:04:17,000 --> 00:04:20,200 Speaker 1: a similar group that's all about building and practicing or 66 00:04:20,200 --> 00:04:24,599 Speaker 1: speaking skills in a friendly environment. In any case, since 67 00:04:24,640 --> 00:04:26,920 Speaker 1: we all have to talk to people all the time, 68 00:04:27,600 --> 00:04:30,240 Speaker 1: you'd think we could do it well, but that is 69 00:04:30,279 --> 00:04:34,799 Speaker 1: not always true. Conversation is a skill like anything else. 70 00:04:35,920 --> 00:04:39,200 Speaker 1: Some people are naturally better at it than others, but 71 00:04:39,279 --> 00:04:42,680 Speaker 1: we can all get better, and getting better can make 72 00:04:42,760 --> 00:04:49,120 Speaker 1: work feel more welcoming and fun. In the meantime, this 73 00:04:49,160 --> 00:04:53,120 Speaker 1: is Laura. Thanks for listening, and here's to making the 74 00:04:53,160 --> 00:05:03,200 Speaker 1: most of our time. Thanks for listening to Before Breakfast. 75 00:05:03,760 --> 00:05:07,520 Speaker 1: If you've got questions, ideas, or feedback, you can reach 76 00:05:07,600 --> 00:05:17,240 Speaker 1: me at Laura at Laura vandercam dot com. Before Breakfast 77 00:05:17,279 --> 00:05:21,560 Speaker 1: is a production of iHeartMedia. For more podcasts from iHeartMedia, 78 00:05:21,640 --> 00:05:25,680 Speaker 1: please visit the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you 79 00:05:25,720 --> 00:05:26,960 Speaker 1: listen to your favorite shows.