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Speaker 1: Hey, this is Anny and Samantha. I'm opening to stuff

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Speaker 1: I'll never told your predict if I heard you. And today,

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Speaker 1: because we've got some vacations and scheduling and all that stuff,

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Speaker 1: we're bringing a classic early. And because it is the

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Speaker 1: end of Pride Month twenty twenty four, I wanted to

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Speaker 1: bring back one that I don't I normally wouldn't bring

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Speaker 1: back because it's so recent. I think it's about a

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Speaker 1: year ago. We did this one, but it was about

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Speaker 1: the pushback against the Pride flag, and because there's been

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Speaker 1: so much development around this, I thought I would bring

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Speaker 1: it back. We recently talked about how in Colorado, the

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Speaker 1: GOP here in the US publicly called for the Pride

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Speaker 1: flag burned. There's been several instances of Pride flags being

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Speaker 1: burned or destroyed. Some people have been arrested. We've got justice.

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Speaker 1: Alito's wife caught on tape talking about her disgust of

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Speaker 1: the Pride flag and how she would like her very

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Speaker 1: angry flag to fly. Also, I learned recently that in

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Speaker 1: Denver there's a lawsuit where a parent is trying to

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Speaker 1: make it that it's required to fly to have the

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Speaker 1: straight Pride flag. And I looked it up. I'd never

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Speaker 1: seen it, and it's real sad. It's a sad flag.

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Speaker 2: Like I can only imagine.

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Speaker 1: It's like it looks like handcuffs and a jail cell.

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Speaker 2: It is very just like stick figures with like an

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Speaker 2: angry face with a flag of zone the two.

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Speaker 1: It's so obviously they're trying to get away from the rainbow.

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Speaker 1: So it's black and white striped.

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Speaker 2: Yes, Sonny was gonna be no colors.

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Speaker 1: No color. And then in the center is like the

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Speaker 1: gender symbols of men and women, but they're they're looped

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Speaker 1: so they look like handcuffs. It's it's not it doesn't

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Speaker 1: look good, it doesn't look fun. And you know, this

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Speaker 1: is coming on a time when a lot of places

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Speaker 1: are trying to ban the Pride flag. It's also coming

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Speaker 1: at a time when I'm going back to the place

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Speaker 1: I talked about in this episode where my uncle is

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Speaker 1: very against the Pride flag. So we'll see how that goes.

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Speaker 1: But also just a lot of really conservative laws about

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Speaker 1: what can and can't be displayed in So I thought,

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Speaker 1: even though it's been I'm pretty sure less than a

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Speaker 1: year since we did this one, I'll bring it back.

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Speaker 1: But I hope that people are having have had a

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Speaker 1: happy pride. I did get a Star Wars Pride flag

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Speaker 1: that I will hang up. I will why it on

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Speaker 1: the flagpole. But no, well I don't want to deal

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Speaker 1: with my uncle, as I discussed in this episode, but

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Speaker 1: I will it will be displayed. But yes, I hope

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Speaker 1: everyone is doing well. And yeah, please enjoy this class episode. Hey,

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Speaker 1: this is Annie and Samantha and welcome to Steffan. Never

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Speaker 1: told you protection of iHeart radio. And today I'm just

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Speaker 1: going to share some personal stuff that was brought on

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Speaker 1: by new use item that I found, but also some

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Speaker 1: stuff going on in my life and it's kind of

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Speaker 1: frustrating around like acceptance of the queer community and LGBTQ

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Speaker 1: plus people and your family. So I hear you if

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Speaker 1: you don't want to hear it right now, but I so. So.

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Speaker 1: There was this news story that said this place in

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Speaker 1: Michigan had banned pride flags in public, and here's a

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Speaker 1: quote from CNN about it. The resolution brought by City

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Speaker 1: council member Mohammed Hassan says that the city council will

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Speaker 1: not provide special treatment to any group of people. City

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Speaker 1: council members shared that flying a Pride flag could potentially

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Speaker 1: lead to other quote radical or racist groups asking for

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Speaker 1: their flags to be flown. So there was that. And

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Speaker 1: then I'm sure you all have seen, but there's been

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Speaker 1: a lot of a lot of the flags at Stone

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Speaker 1: Wall have been destroyed. So I was thinking about this,

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Speaker 1: but I wasn't, like, you know, going to talk about

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Speaker 1: it really. But then I was talking with my mom,

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Speaker 1: and we am very fortunate to have this beach house

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Speaker 1: that my grandparents built. You've been, Sabantha. It's very lovely, yes, yes,

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Speaker 1: but it shared amongst like a lot of people. It's

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Speaker 1: basically I mean, it's got to be fifteen plus people

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Speaker 1: have access to it. And I last two years ago.

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Speaker 1: Two years ago, we were there and I have two

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Speaker 1: friends who I won't say fell in love there, but

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Speaker 1: it was like kind of where their relationship started, their

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Speaker 1: romantic relationships started. They are queer. I've known these women

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Speaker 1: since middle school, high school, so we go every year.

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Speaker 1: So I've known them for a very long time, and

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Speaker 1: I remember joking with them that I thought they were

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Speaker 1: the power couple before I even knew what was going

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Speaker 1: I was like the last one in our friend group

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Speaker 1: to find out because I didn't understand when one of

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Speaker 1: them told me, she was like I love her, and

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Speaker 1: I was like, yeah, me too. You know, friendship.

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Speaker 2: That's just so on par with everything else in dating, romance,

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Speaker 2: love life. So yeah, absolutely.

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Speaker 1: And then like the next day after she told me

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Speaker 1: that because I just got into a lift. This was

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Speaker 1: back in the days when I like went out to

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Speaker 1: clubs at night, and so I got in a lift.

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Speaker 1: She said that, and then I get this text and

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Speaker 1: I was like, we really need to hang out tomorrow again.

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Speaker 1: And I was like, oh, okay, well sure, but they

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Speaker 1: were like, we need to make you understand what we

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Speaker 1: were really right. So it's like an important place in

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Speaker 1: terms of their relationship. And they had their bachelorette party there.

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Speaker 1: It was very cute, a lot of peach themed items

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Speaker 1: and it was very cute. So two years ago, there's

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Speaker 1: a flagpole out fronts and we flew the Pride flag

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Speaker 1: so they could take pictures pictures there. You know, I

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Speaker 1: didn't really think anything of it, which is perhaps saying

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Speaker 1: something I think I've said before. You know, I'm so

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Speaker 1: used to like my friend group in Atlanta, and like

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Speaker 1: I don't encounter homophobia like in person. A lot anymore

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Speaker 1: like online, yes, in the news, yes, but like in person.

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Speaker 1: And so all my friends were sleeping. I was outside alone,

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Speaker 1: just relaxing, and one of my relatives came up to

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Speaker 1: me and he was just acting kind of funny. He

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Speaker 1: was acting kind of weird and he was like, well,

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Speaker 1: where is everybody else? And I sat out there inside

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Speaker 1: and he was like, what are you doing, like just relaxing,

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Speaker 1: you know whatever. The next day, seven am, I had

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Speaker 1: a phone call from my mom that's like, you have

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Speaker 1: to take the flag down. And I was so confused,

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Speaker 1: and I was kind disoriented because it was seven am,

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Speaker 1: and I remember kind of hedging about it where it

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Speaker 1: was like, it's not like causing any harms, you know,

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Speaker 1: this is our property and all this stuff, And it

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Speaker 1: was clear my mom was not she was being asked

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Speaker 1: by someone else, and I just didn't have the heart

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Speaker 1: to like tell my friends to take it down, so

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Speaker 1: we left it up. I didn't say anything about it,

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Speaker 1: and it was just strange because then I was looking

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Speaker 1: back over that in right I had with the relative,

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Speaker 1: and he was it was kind of gross because he

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Speaker 1: was like it felt very like, oh, like he thought

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Speaker 1: maybe they were all inside having sex or something or

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Speaker 1: like you know that kind of sexualization and or he

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Speaker 1: was like angry that now, oh then that attracted to

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Speaker 1: me this old dude, which is gross. And again this

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Speaker 1: is like, maybe that's not what it was. But he

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Speaker 1: didn't even know what the flag meant. He had to

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Speaker 1: look it up. He had to look it up and

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Speaker 1: then call another relative who then called my mom. And

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Speaker 1: so that reminded me of your story with your family, Samantha,

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Speaker 1: where you were like do you even know when pride is?

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Speaker 1: Like he didn't even know what this flag was, right,

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Speaker 1: he was just like, I gotta look it up. Okay, no,

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Speaker 1: this has to be angry. Yes, yes, And it was

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Speaker 1: so sad because, like I said, it's it is it

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Speaker 1: might for my friend, it's an important place, and for

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Speaker 1: me it is who I'm also queer. So it was

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Speaker 1: just like an uncomfortable situation. And then so I try

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Speaker 1: to keep it a secret, which I don't know if

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Speaker 1: it is the good thing or the bad thing, I

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Speaker 1: don't know, but I tried to like preserve I can

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Speaker 1: handle this. I can handle my family, and I'm not

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Speaker 1: going to put it on you. So I try not

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Speaker 1: to tell them anything. The next year, we came and

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Speaker 1: we put up a Star Wars flag because we're that cool,

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Speaker 1: and it was like over wan Kenobi had come out

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Speaker 1: like we were living our best Star Wars life, and

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Speaker 1: we got like a lot of people came over and said, oh,

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Speaker 1: basically the flag. I'm glad it's a different flag than

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Speaker 1: the other flag. Everyone was cool with the Star Wars flag.

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Speaker 2: Wait, people actually came over to tell you that, to

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Speaker 2: tell you that they're glad this's got the other flag.

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Speaker 1: One one person did, and then someone else came over

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Speaker 1: and like, I interpreted what she said as she did

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Speaker 1: not care because my uncle it was my uncle also

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Speaker 1: called the neighbors and asked and they're like, no, we

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Speaker 1: don't care. So that's how I interpreted it. But now

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Speaker 1: I'm not so sure. That's I don't know. But people

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Speaker 1: came up and so the truth had to come out

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Speaker 1: with my friends, where I was like, yes, they were

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Speaker 1: real mad about it.

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Speaker 2: I hate it. So for a full year they didn't know. Yes,

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Speaker 2: your friends didn't.

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Speaker 1: Know, yeah, because I didn't want them to feel like

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Speaker 1: how I was feeling after it.

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Speaker 2: And it also says they didn't listen to the show

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Speaker 2: because I remember we talked about this immediately after how

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Speaker 2: dare you.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, well they do. Actually one of them does

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Speaker 1: listen to a lot of it, so yeah, I know.

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Speaker 2: Anyway.

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Speaker 1: Anyway, anyway, so I had kept it a secret, and

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Speaker 1: then when it came out, I wasn't a big deal.

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Speaker 1: But then I was kind of caught between this desire

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Speaker 1: to like, let's piss this old guy off as much

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Speaker 1: as we can, let's hang up all the flags, and

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Speaker 1: my poor momo was caught in between. So all of that.

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Speaker 1: This other day, my mom called me and it came up,

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Speaker 1: and she said, they've requested you only fly the American

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Speaker 1: flag and no other flag, which I don't care, Like honestly,

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Speaker 1: I don't care. And I could like hang up all

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Speaker 1: of the flags alongside, like there's a lot of things

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Speaker 1: I could do, but it was just kind of like,

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Speaker 1: oh my god, it's been two years, like chill out,

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Speaker 1: just just just stop with this.

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Speaker 2: Feel like hearing this from the beginning of the first

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Speaker 2: incident to this it shows the level of media influence,

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Speaker 2: especially conservative media influence, and where they're getting their news

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Speaker 2: and how they're dealing with it. So their following suit

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Speaker 2: to the conservative gas lighting of the queer individuals in general,

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Speaker 2: which wasn't not happening as much five years ago. It

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Speaker 2: started happening within the Trump administration, and it got bigger

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Speaker 2: and bigger and bigger, and then went from trance to

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Speaker 2: obviously all queer because we knew that was going to

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Speaker 2: happen now doing all the things. But yeah, it almost

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Speaker 2: is like the perfect timelinfe predictor of what's happening in

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Speaker 2: your family.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, it does feel like it's backtracking along with what

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Speaker 1: we're seeing in the news because originally there's like three

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Speaker 1: main family members involved in this, and originally it was

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Speaker 1: like two to one on my side, with my mom

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Speaker 1: obviously being on my side. Now it's two to one

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Speaker 1: against me. Although I mean he didn't say any thing specific,

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Speaker 1: but I feel like that's a pretty clear message.

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Speaker 2: That's especially there's like we have to tell Annie that

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Speaker 2: is more than pointed yes yes.

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Speaker 1: And it was just so infuriating because and I'm sure

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Speaker 1: a lot of listeners can relate to this. I know

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Speaker 1: any listener who's been to a family gathering where you

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Speaker 1: don't agree politically can relate to this. But it's so

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Speaker 1: annoying because there's there is a part of me that's like, no,

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Speaker 1: just to do what I want. And there's another part

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Speaker 1: of me that's like, is that the fight I want

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Speaker 1: to have, is that the fight I want to pull

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Speaker 1: my mom into because I mean, one of them lives

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Speaker 1: like right there, so it would be I would be

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Speaker 1: dealing with it, which is not what I want on

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Speaker 1: a vagation, right, Yeah. But it makes me feel like

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Speaker 1: then I'm not standing up for stuff. But at the

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Speaker 1: same time, I'm like, we all have to choose these battles.

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Speaker 1: But that's why I might Maybe I'll compromise and I'll

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Speaker 1: hang a bunch of them about and not put it

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Speaker 1: on just like.

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Speaker 2: Right, put it on. Get these little little like, uh,

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Speaker 2: decorations that go on tables, you know, while people have

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Speaker 2: flags on tables. Yeah, put it all over your little posts.

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Speaker 1: Yeah.

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Speaker 2: You have a little porch a little inside, just put

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Speaker 2: it there. Yeah.

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Speaker 1: And it's also like it's just frustrated because you know,

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Speaker 1: I don't want to pull my friends into it. I

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Speaker 1: don't want them to get dragged into my family drama,

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Speaker 1: even though I'm sure they have all dealt with it too,

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Speaker 1: So I don't know. I was just like reading this

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Speaker 1: news and then my mom said Dad, and I was like, jeez,

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Speaker 1: it really has become a lot, a lot worse. I

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Speaker 1: do agree with you, but I'm gonna come up with something.

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Speaker 1: I don't know what I'm gonna do.

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Speaker 2: I'm excited to hear what you come up with.

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Speaker 1: Yes, yes, I will. And it is it's like the

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Speaker 1: fact that he didn't even know what it was. That's

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Speaker 1: oh my god. All right, Well i'll report back, I'm

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Speaker 1: sure because we're going in July. Yes, well, it's a

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Speaker 1: says I'm really annoyed too, because they were like, that's

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Speaker 1: what your grandfather would have wanted, only the American flag,

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Speaker 1: And it's like, okay, bring him into this.

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Speaker 2: In what the American flag is today, it's almost more

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Speaker 2: fearful for me to see than anything else. It almost

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Speaker 2: translates into the opposite of what a pride flag would be. Right.

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Speaker 1: It does feel like the people who would proudly be

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Speaker 1: flying it, and I'm not saying you can't, but it

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Speaker 1: feels like a lot of the people who are are

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Speaker 1: probably people I won't agree with little lot of right,

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Speaker 1: h yeah, which is a really unfortunate, unfortunate thing. But yeah, yeah,

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Speaker 1: so we'll see what happens. I will come back listeners

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Speaker 1: if you have any thoughts suggestions on how to deal

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Speaker 1: with this are ways I can like make a statement,

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Speaker 1: but not fly a flag our pole. Please write in.

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Speaker 1: You can emailus at Sepania mom Stuff at iHeartMedia dot com.

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Speaker 1: You can find us on Twitter at Momstup podcast, or

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Speaker 1: on Instagram and TikTok at stuff I've Never Told You.

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Speaker 1: We're also on YouTube. We also have a tea public store. Yes,

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Speaker 1: we also have a book. You can pre or order

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Speaker 1: it at stuff you Should Read books dot com. Also

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Speaker 1: on audible. Thanks as always to our super producer Christina,

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Speaker 1: our executive producer Maya, and our contributor Joey.

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Speaker 2: Thank y'all, yes, and.

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Speaker 1: Thanks to you for listening. Stuff I Never Told You

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Speaker 1: is production of by Heart Radio. For more podcasts from

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