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Speaker 1: Hey, folks, it's Lyle.

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Speaker 2: Get this. I'm coming to over forty cities across the

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Speaker 2: United States, the UK, Europe and Australia to do this

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Speaker 2: here Therapy Gecko Podcast Live. These shows will involve bringing

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Speaker 2: folks from the audience up on stage to talk to

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Speaker 2: a gecko about whatever they want, just like we do

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Speaker 2: on the podcast. The shows are completely unplanned, completely unpredictable,

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Speaker 2: and they will be a lot of fun. So if

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Speaker 2: you're a fan of the podcast, you should definitely come out.

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Speaker 2: Tickets are available right now at therapy geckotour dot com

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Speaker 2: and you should get them before they are sold out.

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Speaker 2: That's therapy geckotour dot com. We'll put the link in

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Speaker 2: the episode description as well. The live shows are are

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Speaker 2: very fun, they're very geko wee, and.

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Speaker 1: I hope to see you there. All right, let's get

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Speaker 1: into the episode.

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Speaker 3: Hi, Hello, what's up cooking some chickens? How are you

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Speaker 3: doing tonight?

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Speaker 1: I'm feeling good. My socks are wet. I've run out

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Speaker 1: of clean socks. And normally when people run out of

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Speaker 1: clean socks, what do they usually do, Alex, the laundry?

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Speaker 1: They do the laundry, answer their socks. What's what they

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Speaker 1: normally do. What do you think I've been doing?

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Speaker 3: Sounds like you have not been doing your laundry.

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Speaker 1: I have not been doing my laundry. Why do you

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Speaker 1: think I'm not doing my laundry?

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Speaker 3: It's a great caution. Do you have in house washer

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Speaker 3: dryer or do you go to a laundromat?

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Speaker 1: I mean it's it's as there's one in where I live,

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Speaker 1: but it's upstairs and I'm downstairs. Effort, Alex, How can

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Speaker 1: I get you today? Is there anything in particular that

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Speaker 1: you called in to talk about?

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Speaker 3: Yes, you wanted to keep it light and positive today,

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Speaker 3: so I wanted to talk about the benefits of not

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Speaker 3: having a traditional parent daughter relationship.

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Speaker 1: Okay, in what ways? How would you define a non

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Speaker 1: traditional parent daughter relationship?

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Speaker 3: I think a good example would be like that guy

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Speaker 3: who went to the strip club with his mom, and

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Speaker 3: I feel like mine is very similar, but I have

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Speaker 3: changed mine in the way that my mom has like

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Speaker 3: joined my rave family.

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Speaker 1: Your mom has joined your rave family?

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Speaker 4: Yeah?

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Speaker 3: Yeah, what a enture to her first festival this year

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Speaker 3: and she just had the best time. And so now

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Speaker 3: when we go to the raves and go to the shows,

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Speaker 3: we always bring her with us. And I do have

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Speaker 3: to say she is usually the best dressed for the event.

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Speaker 1: Okay, what does she wear that makes her the best dressed?

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Speaker 3: This summer, she actually made all her own outfits. She

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Speaker 3: made these like purple fuzzy crotchless chaps and then wore

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Speaker 3: like super sparkly underwear and she had one of those

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Speaker 3: like fuzzy led light up coats. I live in Alaska

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Speaker 3: and it gets really chilly, so her whole thing is

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Speaker 3: layer so she changes her outfits throughout the day, so

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Speaker 3: it's like less clothes, shiny all the way to fuzzy.

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Speaker 3: It's kind of funny.

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Speaker 1: What is the raves scene like in Alaska?

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Speaker 3: It's on the return. I would say COVID really killed it.

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Speaker 3: And in the last maybe like six months, it's become

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Speaker 3: a lot more prevalent with shows. It's all local, you know.

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Speaker 3: I can't say that there's a lot of bigs part.

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Speaker 1: I'm surprised that COVID killed I'm surprised that anyone in

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Speaker 1: Alaska has COVID, Like, how did it even get over there?

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Speaker 1: Alaska is like all the way and four It's like

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Speaker 1: not even in a place.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, I heard you were coming here for your tour,

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Speaker 3: and I have to say, I'm very excited.

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Speaker 1: Well we'll see, we'll see. We haven't booked in Alaska

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Speaker 1: place yet, but we're working on it anyway. Okay, So

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Speaker 1: you have this non traditional relationship with your mom. Has

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Speaker 1: it always been that way? What is your relationship with

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Speaker 1: your mom typically been? Like it says that you're twenty nine,

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Speaker 1: so you've had, you know, a long relationship with her.

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Speaker 1: How has it helved over the year. Y?

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Speaker 3: I think I was I was more of a daddy's girl,

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Speaker 3: and then my father passed away, and you know, take

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Speaker 3: advantage of the parent you have left create a better

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Speaker 3: relationship that we've been just like figuring out ways to

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Speaker 3: communicate better and spend time together better and like in

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Speaker 3: healthier ways. So we're not, you know, frustrated by each other.

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Speaker 1: Had you guys been frustrated with each other pretty often beforehand?

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Speaker 3: Definitely? I think we just don't. We're very similar and

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Speaker 3: stubborn and it just doesn't communicate very well.

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Speaker 1: In what ways? Would you say that you guys are stubborn.

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Speaker 3: Just like sticking to your opinion and having strong opinions,

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Speaker 3: you know, and that can butt heads. And I think

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Speaker 3: in my household with my history. It's like quick to

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Speaker 3: frustration and anger, just you know, being that being my

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Speaker 3: mom instead of someone I'm just trying to have a

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Speaker 3: conversation with.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, I'm all right. I have to ask this.

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Speaker 1: Did you and your mom do drugs together?

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Speaker 5: Yes?

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Speaker 3: My mom actually grows mushrooms.

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Speaker 1: Ah.

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Speaker 3: We've also taken Mollie together, which was really fun. But yeah,

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Speaker 3: my mom grows mushrooms. I feel like that's what she's

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Speaker 3: She partakes a lot more than I do in.

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Speaker 1: That particularly, really, so she was turning you on.

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Speaker 3: I came home a couple oh ten.

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Speaker 1: Mm hm, you were gonna say you came home.

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Speaker 3: I came home a couple of weeks ago, and I

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Speaker 3: was staying over at someone else's house. And when I

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Speaker 3: came home, I pulled up in the driveway and her

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Speaker 3: apart were we live in a four pleques. I live

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Speaker 3: in a different unit, And when I pulled up in

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Speaker 3: the driveway, her apartment was all lit up in lights

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Speaker 3: and I could hear music. And I came inside and

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Speaker 3: she had invited over like five other people from the

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Speaker 3: the like rave scene that we hang out, the group,

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Speaker 3: the family that we hang out with, and they were

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Speaker 3: all vibing out and having a chill mushroom Sunday in

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Speaker 3: the living room upstairs, and that was it was a

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Speaker 3: very pleasant surprise to you know, have all these people

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Speaker 3: hanging out and having a good time and knowing that

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Speaker 3: I don't have to be like a center catalyst to

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Speaker 3: bring them together.

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Speaker 1: Hmmm, you know I have to. I'm curious about this

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Speaker 1: because I think traditionally, well, okay, so these these people

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Speaker 1: that your mom had over when you came to her house,

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Speaker 1: were they your friends before and then your mom came

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Speaker 1: into the scene.

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Speaker 3: Yes, we have a organized kickball games in the summer

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Speaker 3: and we have like a very centralized friend group and

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Speaker 3: then our rave family's like built around that. So she's

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Speaker 3: met them through the kickball But yeah, they were mine

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Speaker 3: more of my friends first.

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Speaker 1: I think you Well, I was going to Your perspective

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Speaker 1: on this is really interesting because I think in some

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Speaker 1: situations people could look at this like, oh, my mom

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Speaker 1: is like stealing my friends, or they would feel like

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Speaker 1: jealous about it. But you have the complete opposite perspective.

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Speaker 1: You're actually glad that somebody who is important to you

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Speaker 1: in your life is integrating with other people who were

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Speaker 1: important to you in your life and you view it

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Speaker 1: as a positive thing.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, I definitely view myself as someone who tries to

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Speaker 3: bring good people together. You know, Alaska's really small and

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Speaker 3: it can be really hard to make new friends. You know,

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Speaker 3: only have so many options. So that's kind of why

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Speaker 3: I organize the kickball too. It's like I just want

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Speaker 3: people to you know, be friends with all these other

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Speaker 3: people and we can create like a good community, which

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Speaker 3: is kind of tying into the EDM thing as well.

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Speaker 1: And you know, it's interesting because you're now that you're

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Speaker 1: twenty nine, it's like you don't really your relationship with

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Speaker 1: your parents kind of naturally changes because you don't really

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Speaker 1: need your mom to like be your your mom as

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Speaker 1: much as you did, you know, when you were growing up,

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Speaker 1: and for her to take this role in your life,

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Speaker 1: like as you know, as a friend that you hang

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Speaker 1: out with all your other friends that do mushrooms with

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Speaker 1: is an interesting development of that relationship.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, I completely agree. That's how I look at it too,

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Speaker 3: and I think it's been a really positive thing. We're

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Speaker 3: really looking forward to festivals next year. We have one

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Speaker 3: big one, but then we kind of like do our

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Speaker 3: own thing out camping with like generators and speakers, so

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Speaker 3: it'll be really nice to have her around for that

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Speaker 3: time too.

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Speaker 1: Has there been any like any cons or anything weird

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Speaker 1: about integrating your mom into your life in this way.

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Speaker 3: I'm always kind of nervous, like what if she you know,

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Speaker 3: she's an adult and she can make her own choices,

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Speaker 3: But what if she did choose to like sleep with

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Speaker 3: one of my friends. I think that would be a

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Speaker 3: con I don't think she would, but I've always kind

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Speaker 3: of viewed that as like, I don't know if I

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Speaker 3: would be comfortable with that.

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Speaker 1: Hmmmm.

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Speaker 3: Why Why would they like to hit on her and

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Speaker 3: be like, Oh, it's your mom?

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Speaker 1: Mm hmmm hm. Why do you feel like that would

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Speaker 1: make you uncomfortable?

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Speaker 3: I think it depends on the person, right, Like if

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Speaker 3: it was someone who did it and then like kept

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Speaker 3: throwing it into my face for the rest of my life,

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Speaker 3: like who I had sex with your mom? You know,

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Speaker 3: like that it would be kind of like my barrier.

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Speaker 3: Like I think it's funny when people can be like, oh,

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Speaker 3: it's at your mom's house last weekend, you know, hanging

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Speaker 3: out and doing mushrooms in the fort, which is like

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Speaker 3: a positive thing. With the other thing I could see

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Speaker 3: it being positive, but I don't know. I just I'm

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Speaker 3: nervous if that were to happen how I would react.

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Speaker 1: M Now, if your mom, let's say, like, is it

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Speaker 1: just a hookup thing that would bother you? Like if

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Speaker 1: somebody from this group started like seriously dating your mom,

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Speaker 1: how would that feel?

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Speaker 3: I don't know. My mom has a tendency to like

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Speaker 3: she dated our like a bouncer at one of the

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Speaker 3: regular bars that we go to, and so I think

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Speaker 3: that would actually be more comfortable for me, which sounds weird,

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Speaker 3: but you know, she's been single for like ten years now,

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Speaker 3: maybe a little bit more and live your best life.

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Speaker 3: I just don't want it to negatively impact mine.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, this is an interesting issue because a lot of

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Speaker 1: the way that you're integrating your mom into your life

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Speaker 1: is very much a I would say, like a celebration

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Speaker 1: of her as a person in your life who has

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Speaker 1: her own independent identity outside of just being your mother.

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Speaker 1: And you've integrated her into your friend group and you know,

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Speaker 1: into this this rave scene, which I'm sure is very

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Speaker 1: exciting for her, but you have this fear of it

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Speaker 1: extending into this like sexual romantic place with the rest

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Speaker 1: of your friend group, which you know, I can, I can,

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Speaker 1: I can. I can understand why people bragging about fucking

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Speaker 1: your mom would be a not pleasant thing.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, I like I said, I don't think it'll ever happen,

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Speaker 3: but you know, you had asked, and I think that

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Speaker 3: was my honest answer.

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Speaker 1: Mm hm. Is this something you've ever talked to your

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Speaker 1: mom about?

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Speaker 3: No, I have talked to my therapist about it.

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Speaker 1: What did they say.

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Speaker 3: Never my mother. She The advice she gave me was

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Speaker 3: it's just very simple. It was like, you know, re

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Speaker 3: react to it and let your body process it, and

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Speaker 3: just communicate whatever happens with her and hopefully you guys

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Speaker 3: can work it out. She knows that we don't communicate

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Speaker 3: very well, so we came up with some like tips

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Speaker 3: and tricks for going if that situation were to arise.

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Speaker 3: But fingers crossed.

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Speaker 4: It does not.

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Speaker 1: Can I hear what these tips and tricks are.

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Speaker 3: One of them was like writing down ideas like kind

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Speaker 3: of like almost like in a like a you know,

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Speaker 3: just like notes, so if you did get flustered in

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Speaker 3: the conversation, you could just draw back to that and

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Speaker 3: make sure that you guys are staying on track and

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Speaker 3: it's not just like exploding, And the other one was

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Speaker 3: maybe writing her a letter instead, since I you know,

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Speaker 3: we communicate well over text, just not in person. Yeah, yeah,

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Speaker 3: so like writing her a letter, so it's like more

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Speaker 3: than just a text message that someone can like look

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Speaker 3: at on their phone and ignore.

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Speaker 1: Right, right. You can also you can collect your thoughts

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Speaker 1: a little bit better when you have some time to

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Speaker 1: write them down and prepare them. Yeah, exactly, why do

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Speaker 1: you why do you feel like you like I'm prepared? Sure? Well, okay,

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Speaker 1: so what I was gonna say just now is like

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Speaker 1: this is into the more I'm talking about it though,

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Speaker 1: it's very interesting because you have integrated your mom into

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Speaker 1: your life in this you know, in this way. Why

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Speaker 1: do you feel like you have trouble communicating with her?

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Speaker 3: I think it's mostly just a childhood thing. She's one

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Speaker 3: of eleven kids, and so her family is like a

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Speaker 3: yelling family, right, They never really like you don't you're crying,

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Speaker 3: You don't sit down and talk to you mom about

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Speaker 3: your feelings. You just shut up and sit down and

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Speaker 3: need dinner because there's eleven of you.

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Speaker 1: And is that the uh? Does she bring that energy

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Speaker 1: into your family when when you were growing up.

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Speaker 3: I think there was definitely like a conscious effort to

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Speaker 3: have conversations. I think when it came to like serious topics, uh,

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Speaker 3: they were just not handled as well as they could

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Speaker 3: have been. And it always gets kind of ugly. I

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Speaker 3: think again, like you know, just a wolfing stubborn you

261
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Speaker 3: don't want to like give on either side about what

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Speaker 3: you're arguing about.

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Speaker 1: Right. You mentioned you guys both being stubborn. Has that

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Speaker 1: has this gotten like has this communication issue gotten like

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Speaker 1: better as you've your relationship has progressed and as you've

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Speaker 1: degraded her to your rave family, I would say yes.

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Speaker 3: I think seeing her and being able to interact with

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Speaker 3: her in a way that is more like friendly and

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Speaker 3: just like relaxing or you know, partying or whatever it

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Speaker 3: is kind of when you have enough of those interactions,

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Speaker 3: I feel like it's changed the way I see her

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Speaker 3: when I speak to her. Yeah, I don't. I haven't

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Speaker 3: called my mom mom in like, I don't know, six

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Speaker 3: and a half years. I call her by her name.

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Speaker 3: People think that's weird, but it's just when we started

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Speaker 3: attending bars together. It was something I did because I

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Speaker 3: didn't I just didn't want to be like mom across

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Speaker 3: the bar, you know.

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Speaker 1: Hmmm, so you've been calling her by her first name

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Speaker 1: for six years.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, And I think kind of having that separation of

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Speaker 3: your mother versus you know, this another adult person, and

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Speaker 3: having enough of those interactions has kind of like helped

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Speaker 3: rewire my brain. So when I see her and we

285
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Speaker 3: are talking, I don't just think of her as like

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Speaker 3: my annoying mother who wants you know, A B and

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Speaker 3: C and uh. It's it's just allowed me to like

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Speaker 3: actually have a conversation. I don't know what it's like

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Speaker 3: on her end, but she also seems to communicate a

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Speaker 3: lot better with me as well.

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Speaker 1: All yeah, I was gonna ask like about her end,

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Speaker 1: like how do you think she feels about you calling

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Speaker 1: her by her name instead of calling her your mom?

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Speaker 3: She doesn't mind it. We've had convers stations about it.

295
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Speaker 3: There's a lot of people who think it's weird and

296
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Speaker 3: they'll be like why do like why do you call

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Speaker 3: her that? And I'm like, that's her second name, Like, yeah,

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Speaker 3: she's my mom, but we I don't know. I just

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Speaker 3: I feel like once that kind of like high school

300
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Speaker 3: teenage mothering situation turned off, I just turned the name off.

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Speaker 1: Do you feel like you calling her by her real name,

302
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Speaker 1: which you're saying, is giving you a more I guess,

303
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Speaker 1: three dimensional portrait of her in your head, seeing her

304
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Speaker 1: as more of her own person than just as your mom.

305
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Speaker 1: Do you think that's helped you guys' relationship.

306
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Speaker 3: I don't think I noticed a difference in the beginning

307
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Speaker 3: as much as I do now, And I don't really

308
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Speaker 3: know what, you know, what exactly came into play with that,

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Speaker 3: but I I think in the beginning it was just like, oh,

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Speaker 3: I'm at the bar with my mom. I don't want

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Speaker 3: other people to see her at my mom and Kate,

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Speaker 3: you know whatever.

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Speaker 1: So a part of it was like in service of her.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, I mean she's you know, we we, like I said,

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Speaker 3: we frequent the same bar, and if she's if she's

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Speaker 3: on like a date there and I just so happened

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Speaker 3: to also be going there. I don't want to walk

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Speaker 3: up and be like hey mom and.

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Speaker 5: He's like, oh you you have.

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Speaker 3: Kids, like you know, I just kind of erased that

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Speaker 3: part out and just call her Liz because we've had

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Speaker 3: that happen before, where she's like on a date and

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Speaker 3: I walk up and then you know, at the end

324
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Speaker 3: of the night, we I asked her if she needed

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Speaker 3: a ride, and she was like, oh, that's so nice,

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Speaker 3: and she's like, yeah, the daughter, you know, but I

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Speaker 3: didn't he wouldn't know that because I didn't call her mom.

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Speaker 1: This is really fascinating to me because this is like,

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00:21:02,760 --> 00:21:09,920
Speaker 1: you know, there is something really especially you know, when

330
00:21:09,920 --> 00:21:13,239
Speaker 1: you become like an adult adult, there is something to

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Speaker 1: be said about you. You really upgrade your relationship with

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Speaker 1: your parents the more you can see them outside of

333
00:21:21,400 --> 00:21:25,240
Speaker 1: the context of them being your parents. But then within that,

334
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Speaker 1: how do you also maintain you know, I mean, the

335
00:21:29,640 --> 00:21:33,000
Speaker 1: fact that they are your parents and that is its

336
00:21:33,040 --> 00:21:39,280
Speaker 1: own special relationship. It's an interesting push and pull. So

337
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Speaker 1: I have a question for you, and I was kind

338
00:21:42,000 --> 00:21:48,440
Speaker 1: of holding on to it for a bit. Now, you

339
00:21:48,480 --> 00:21:51,600
Speaker 1: have done Molly and mushrooms with your mother, I assume

340
00:21:51,760 --> 00:21:53,920
Speaker 1: several times with all the raves and stuff.

341
00:21:55,480 --> 00:22:00,840
Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, probably probably like three or four times significantly. Yeah,

342
00:22:00,880 --> 00:22:03,720
Speaker 3: but like you know, at home chilling with all her

343
00:22:04,560 --> 00:22:07,479
Speaker 3: fuck shitty, we probably like ten or twelve.

344
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Speaker 1: And And have you ever done Molly your mushrooms with

345
00:22:10,760 --> 00:22:12,960
Speaker 1: just her or is it always in a group setting?

346
00:22:14,359 --> 00:22:17,760
Speaker 3: Yes? I have just her. Yeah, we've we've done that

347
00:22:18,640 --> 00:22:23,000
Speaker 3: we did like the music festival. And then another significant

348
00:22:23,000 --> 00:22:27,960
Speaker 3: time was we actually in the four plexat we have,

349
00:22:28,160 --> 00:22:33,640
Speaker 3: there's a Airbnb also, and so instead of my mom

350
00:22:33,680 --> 00:22:38,240
Speaker 3: renting out the airbnb that night, she just left it

351
00:22:38,280 --> 00:22:41,560
Speaker 3: open and we turned it into like kind of like

352
00:22:41,600 --> 00:22:44,520
Speaker 3: a like a DJ room and like put a couple

353
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Speaker 3: of DJs in there and had like lights and stuff,

354
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Speaker 3: and we had a bunch of our friends over and

355
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Speaker 3: and that was a pretty significant time as well.

356
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Speaker 1: I'm talking about like just well, okay, so let me

357
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Speaker 1: here's what I'm getting at is like and if you know,

358
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Speaker 1: for me, I've experienced, like you know, Molly mushrooms. There

359
00:23:01,040 --> 00:23:03,400
Speaker 1: they are like you know, you said your and your

360
00:23:03,400 --> 00:23:06,879
Speaker 1: mom have trouble like communicating with each other. And to me,

361
00:23:07,080 --> 00:23:11,600
Speaker 1: like Molly is like, it's just the fucking ultimates. Here's

362
00:23:12,520 --> 00:23:17,560
Speaker 1: everything on my chest and every vulnerable vulnerability I have

363
00:23:17,720 --> 00:23:20,280
Speaker 1: to give. Let me just throw it out there, like

364
00:23:20,320 --> 00:23:23,240
Speaker 1: it really kind of primes your brain in that sense.

365
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Speaker 1: And I guess it. I have very limited experience with mushrooms,

366
00:23:26,600 --> 00:23:29,960
Speaker 1: but I assume it does a similar thing. And have

367
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Speaker 1: you had any interactions with your mom both of you

368
00:23:33,000 --> 00:23:37,879
Speaker 1: guys being on these these drugs that kind of enhance

369
00:23:37,960 --> 00:23:42,320
Speaker 1: your tendency for vulnerability and sharing. Has that brought up

370
00:23:43,200 --> 00:23:49,240
Speaker 1: anything in in this your guys' relationship, or like any

371
00:23:49,520 --> 00:23:51,040
Speaker 1: thing that you guys have been talking about, you know

372
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Speaker 1: what I'm kind of asking.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, Yeah, No, I totally get that. No, I don't

374
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Speaker 3: really feel like it has more chillen like at home

375
00:24:00,600 --> 00:24:02,760
Speaker 3: with the mushrooms, like you said, like it is, it's

376
00:24:02,800 --> 00:24:05,560
Speaker 3: not the same as far as like you said, still

377
00:24:05,600 --> 00:24:09,719
Speaker 3: your guts and tell everything. But I do think it

378
00:24:09,800 --> 00:24:12,879
Speaker 3: makes things easier, just like in my mind more clear

379
00:24:12,880 --> 00:24:14,400
Speaker 3: and I'm able to communicate better.

380
00:24:15,480 --> 00:24:17,040
Speaker 1: So what helps you communicate better with her?

381
00:24:19,320 --> 00:24:24,239
Speaker 3: Yeah? I can say that we had one experience at

382
00:24:24,400 --> 00:24:28,480
Speaker 3: a music festival where she wanted to have a conversation

383
00:24:28,560 --> 00:24:32,399
Speaker 3: about something, but for me, it was just kind of

384
00:24:32,480 --> 00:24:36,040
Speaker 3: triggering with my dad, and so I just didn't feel

385
00:24:36,080 --> 00:24:39,600
Speaker 3: comfortable sharing that moment with her in that time. You know,

386
00:24:39,680 --> 00:24:41,840
Speaker 3: it's supposed to be like a positive space for me,

387
00:24:42,560 --> 00:24:45,520
Speaker 3: So I kind of shut that down and we I

388
00:24:45,600 --> 00:24:50,080
Speaker 3: tried to revisit it after, but she couldn't really figure

389
00:24:50,080 --> 00:24:52,679
Speaker 3: out why it was significant. I don't know if she

390
00:24:52,840 --> 00:24:55,480
Speaker 3: was telling the truth and she just didn't want to

391
00:24:55,520 --> 00:24:57,800
Speaker 3: talk about it, or you know what I mean.

392
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Speaker 1: So she in that music festival environment, like had she

393
00:25:02,680 --> 00:25:05,120
Speaker 1: was on what's molly or mushrooms or something like that,

394
00:25:05,960 --> 00:25:10,240
Speaker 1: and yeah, this thing that she really wanted to talk

395
00:25:10,240 --> 00:25:14,240
Speaker 1: about was like brought up into her mind, but it

396
00:25:14,320 --> 00:25:16,760
Speaker 1: was too intense for you at the time, so you

397
00:25:16,800 --> 00:25:18,240
Speaker 1: didn't you didn't have the conversation.

398
00:25:20,720 --> 00:25:26,800
Speaker 3: Yeah, exactly. I find that mushrooms make me really emotional,

399
00:25:26,960 --> 00:25:31,119
Speaker 3: like I feel things a lot deeper. And so while

400
00:25:31,800 --> 00:25:37,359
Speaker 3: having those conversations is great, if they ever veer, like

401
00:25:37,480 --> 00:25:39,680
Speaker 3: to one side or the other in a negative way,

402
00:25:39,760 --> 00:25:43,120
Speaker 3: I would not like to get kind of trapped in that.

403
00:25:43,200 --> 00:25:46,520
Speaker 3: You know, my brain tends to reprocess those things a lot,

404
00:25:46,560 --> 00:25:50,920
Speaker 3: so it's something I try to avoid. We did later

405
00:25:51,000 --> 00:25:54,720
Speaker 3: that night, have a good situation. We were like at the

406
00:25:54,800 --> 00:25:58,479
Speaker 3: stage and she had not worn her glasses, and so

407
00:25:59,720 --> 00:26:03,359
Speaker 3: the artists had put up on the screens a bunch

408
00:26:03,400 --> 00:26:05,240
Speaker 3: of words, like a bunch of like self care and

409
00:26:05,280 --> 00:26:07,680
Speaker 3: self love mantras, and we were all supposed to say

410
00:26:07,680 --> 00:26:10,480
Speaker 3: it together as a crowd, and she couldn't read them

411
00:26:10,560 --> 00:26:12,920
Speaker 3: because she had lost her glasses. So I would read

412
00:26:12,960 --> 00:26:15,119
Speaker 3: them to her, and so it was kind of like

413
00:26:15,160 --> 00:26:17,600
Speaker 3: we were saying it to each other and the last

414
00:26:17,600 --> 00:26:20,399
Speaker 3: one was I love you, and that was really cute,

415
00:26:20,440 --> 00:26:23,000
Speaker 3: you know, and we were holding hands and I was like, damn,

416
00:26:23,000 --> 00:26:25,560
Speaker 3: I can't remember the last time I held my mother's hand,

417
00:26:25,640 --> 00:26:28,920
Speaker 3: and had to have been like fifteen years.

418
00:26:30,600 --> 00:26:34,440
Speaker 1: When was this.

419
00:26:34,440 --> 00:26:38,960
Speaker 3: This was the first weekend of September. This year was

420
00:26:39,000 --> 00:26:42,560
Speaker 3: our first year we actually have a real quote unquote

421
00:26:42,600 --> 00:26:47,960
Speaker 3: real for Alaska DM Music Festival. The first year I

422
00:26:47,960 --> 00:26:52,240
Speaker 3: think went really well. It's called Spectrum. It's pretty cool.

423
00:26:52,640 --> 00:26:54,600
Speaker 3: I'm really excited to go back next year.

424
00:27:00,119 --> 00:27:04,359
Speaker 1: So does any like that your mom had that thing

425
00:27:04,680 --> 00:27:09,080
Speaker 1: that she wanted to bring up, those kind of personal

426
00:27:09,520 --> 00:27:13,440
Speaker 1: and you didn't really want to talk about. Does any

427
00:27:13,600 --> 00:27:17,720
Speaker 1: part of you, either at of curiosity or out of

428
00:27:17,760 --> 00:27:21,800
Speaker 1: anything like desire to in the future get your mom

429
00:27:21,840 --> 00:27:25,520
Speaker 1: in a place where you guys can talk about whatever

430
00:27:25,560 --> 00:27:26,600
Speaker 1: that thing was.

431
00:27:29,280 --> 00:27:32,000
Speaker 3: I kind of brought it up to her and she

432
00:27:32,160 --> 00:27:34,879
Speaker 3: had said that it like I was like, hey, you

433
00:27:34,920 --> 00:27:37,000
Speaker 3: remember and you wanted to talk about blah blah blah,

434
00:27:37,040 --> 00:27:41,000
Speaker 3: and she was like, yeah, kind of, I don't really remember,

435
00:27:41,640 --> 00:27:44,119
Speaker 3: like why it was significant to me at that time,

436
00:27:44,400 --> 00:27:47,080
Speaker 3: So it's not I guess it's just not something that's

437
00:27:47,080 --> 00:27:48,560
Speaker 3: but it's kind of gonna kind of like you know,

438
00:27:49,320 --> 00:27:52,000
Speaker 3: you get a light bulb and then it's like gone.

439
00:27:52,000 --> 00:27:54,520
Speaker 3: I don't think it was something super serious as much

440
00:27:54,560 --> 00:27:55,400
Speaker 3: as like a memory.

441
00:27:56,160 --> 00:28:00,720
Speaker 1: Okay, well that's this is it. This is really cool.

442
00:28:00,760 --> 00:28:04,159
Speaker 1: It's great that you, like, I don't know, it sounds

443
00:28:04,160 --> 00:28:06,439
Speaker 1: like there's you're you're figuring out a lot of stuff,

444
00:28:06,480 --> 00:28:09,320
Speaker 1: but that you know, you and your mom are like

445
00:28:09,480 --> 00:28:15,760
Speaker 1: very heavily in each other's lives and yeah, you know,

446
00:28:15,840 --> 00:28:17,480
Speaker 1: finding these moments with each other.

447
00:28:21,640 --> 00:28:26,200
Speaker 3: Yeah, I feel really lucky to have cultivated that type

448
00:28:26,200 --> 00:28:31,880
Speaker 3: of relationship. And like I said, we're very similar and

449
00:28:31,920 --> 00:28:34,359
Speaker 3: she loves to host and so do I, and so

450
00:28:34,440 --> 00:28:37,280
Speaker 3: it works out really well to live so close. And

451
00:28:38,840 --> 00:28:44,320
Speaker 3: we definitely have an interesting, unique type of relationship. But

452
00:28:44,400 --> 00:28:47,040
Speaker 3: I think for us it's been really positive.

453
00:28:50,280 --> 00:28:53,080
Speaker 1: Alex. Is there anything else that like you want to

454
00:28:53,280 --> 00:28:58,200
Speaker 1: say about this or any other kind of you know,

455
00:28:58,280 --> 00:29:00,000
Speaker 1: aspects of this that you felt like we didn't tell

456
00:29:00,000 --> 00:29:02,440
Speaker 1: talk about or anything at all like that.

457
00:29:05,640 --> 00:29:08,880
Speaker 3: Uh No, I don't think so. I just wanted to

458
00:29:09,000 --> 00:29:11,400
Speaker 3: like bring it to people's attention because I found the

459
00:29:12,200 --> 00:29:15,320
Speaker 3: you know, I found the strip club thing with the

460
00:29:15,360 --> 00:29:17,920
Speaker 3: mom so interesting. I was like, damn, is that something.

461
00:29:17,760 --> 00:29:18,360
Speaker 2: I would go do?

462
00:29:18,520 --> 00:29:21,080
Speaker 3: Like I really had to think about it. And then

463
00:29:21,120 --> 00:29:23,360
Speaker 3: also being able to be on the show was pretty

464
00:29:23,480 --> 00:29:24,880
Speaker 3: pretty cool. Nice to talk to you.

465
00:29:25,480 --> 00:29:27,560
Speaker 1: Yeah, I'm thinking about a lot of the stuff you said, like,

466
00:29:27,960 --> 00:29:29,720
Speaker 1: you know, how the fact that you call her by

467
00:29:29,960 --> 00:29:33,080
Speaker 1: her first name and that's weird to some people, and like,

468
00:29:33,920 --> 00:29:35,440
Speaker 1: you know, a lot of like I said, I mean,

469
00:29:35,480 --> 00:29:37,480
Speaker 1: even how when you were telling me about how they

470
00:29:38,200 --> 00:29:42,280
Speaker 1: your mom has your friends over without you, to have

471
00:29:42,320 --> 00:29:44,760
Speaker 1: these rooms to kind of come over and they're hanging out,

472
00:29:45,840 --> 00:29:53,520
Speaker 1: Like I can see why people would find stuff like

473
00:29:53,600 --> 00:29:57,120
Speaker 1: that strange. And I'm really thinking about my own opinion

474
00:29:57,160 --> 00:30:01,760
Speaker 1: on it, and like, well, why is it strange? Especially?

475
00:30:02,320 --> 00:30:06,080
Speaker 1: I mean, you're twenty nine and can ask cold you know, Yeah,

476
00:30:06,440 --> 00:30:14,160
Speaker 1: you're twenty nine. Your mom's howell she is Okay. So

477
00:30:14,240 --> 00:30:16,520
Speaker 1: you guys are both like grown, grown, grown ass adults,

478
00:30:16,600 --> 00:30:19,720
Speaker 1: and so your relationship is at a point where it

479
00:30:20,280 --> 00:30:25,120
Speaker 1: can reasonably take a lot of different forms.

480
00:30:25,680 --> 00:30:26,160
Speaker 5: And.

481
00:30:27,640 --> 00:30:30,479
Speaker 1: I don't know, I don't know like what exactly is

482
00:30:30,680 --> 00:30:36,479
Speaker 1: normal or kind of like the depth in which you

483
00:30:36,520 --> 00:30:40,000
Speaker 1: can dive into with your parents, especially again, as you

484
00:30:40,040 --> 00:30:42,440
Speaker 1: grow older and you look at them more three dimensionally.

485
00:30:44,800 --> 00:30:46,120
Speaker 1: I don't know. I don't know if there is a

486
00:30:46,160 --> 00:30:51,400
Speaker 1: weird or normal way to evolve that relationship. You know,

487
00:30:51,480 --> 00:30:53,280
Speaker 1: it is kind of just whatever works for you. And

488
00:30:53,400 --> 00:30:55,200
Speaker 1: it sounds like, you know, you had that really beautiful

489
00:30:55,200 --> 00:30:58,400
Speaker 1: moment where you guys were doing those uh affirmations with

490
00:30:58,440 --> 00:31:02,040
Speaker 1: her and holding each other's hands, and it seems like

491
00:31:02,120 --> 00:31:07,200
Speaker 1: that's a, you know, a really beautiful and integral moment

492
00:31:07,240 --> 00:31:10,160
Speaker 1: in your relationship that you wouldn't have gotten if you

493
00:31:10,240 --> 00:31:13,920
Speaker 1: hadn't kind of made the extra steps to integrate her

494
00:31:13,960 --> 00:31:16,520
Speaker 1: more into your life.

495
00:31:16,840 --> 00:31:17,120
Speaker 5: Yeah.

496
00:31:17,520 --> 00:31:21,480
Speaker 3: Yeah, Like I told you, I actually live in the

497
00:31:21,480 --> 00:31:24,440
Speaker 3: same fourplex as her. If you want to ask her questions,

498
00:31:24,480 --> 00:31:25,880
Speaker 3: I could take the phone upstairs.

499
00:31:27,040 --> 00:31:38,959
Speaker 1: Ooh hmm, give me one second. We have okay, let

500
00:31:39,000 --> 00:31:39,440
Speaker 1: me thank you.

501
00:31:40,680 --> 00:31:41,000
Speaker 5: M hm.

502
00:31:41,840 --> 00:31:44,560
Speaker 1: You know what. Yeah, let's talk to her for at

503
00:31:44,600 --> 00:31:45,200
Speaker 1: least a little bit.

504
00:31:46,680 --> 00:31:50,520
Speaker 3: A little bit and she's not here anymore. She was

505
00:31:50,760 --> 00:31:53,000
Speaker 3: just here. She was in my apartment earlier in the call,

506
00:31:53,080 --> 00:31:55,200
Speaker 3: trying to talk to me, So I thought she was home.

507
00:31:55,800 --> 00:31:56,680
Speaker 1: Oh is she not here?

508
00:31:59,400 --> 00:31:59,480
Speaker 5: No?

509
00:31:59,720 --> 00:32:02,440
Speaker 3: Early or she came downstairs and was trying to talk

510
00:32:02,480 --> 00:32:05,200
Speaker 3: to me and so I just came upstairs, but she's

511
00:32:05,200 --> 00:32:05,880
Speaker 3: not here.

512
00:32:07,280 --> 00:32:10,080
Speaker 1: Oh that's okay. Where do think she went?

513
00:32:12,880 --> 00:32:16,160
Speaker 3: I'm not sure she likes to go to bars too,

514
00:32:16,240 --> 00:32:18,040
Speaker 3: so she might just be having dinner or something. I

515
00:32:18,120 --> 00:32:21,720
Speaker 3: think it's yeah, it's like six thirty. But that kind

516
00:32:21,760 --> 00:32:26,920
Speaker 3: of ties into the side of like more of a friend, right,

517
00:32:27,000 --> 00:32:29,200
Speaker 3: Like we live in the same building, but we don't

518
00:32:29,200 --> 00:32:31,360
Speaker 3: live in the same apartments. Like I thought she was home,

519
00:32:31,400 --> 00:32:35,840
Speaker 3: but I didn't know. We shared locations on the phone,

520
00:32:35,880 --> 00:32:38,200
Speaker 3: so it's nice to be able to check, you know,

521
00:32:38,240 --> 00:32:39,520
Speaker 3: see if somebody is home or not.

522
00:32:40,480 --> 00:32:43,760
Speaker 1: Well, have her have her call in on her own phone.

523
00:32:45,200 --> 00:32:46,520
Speaker 1: At some point, I'd love to talk to her. I

524
00:32:46,560 --> 00:32:48,360
Speaker 1: don't know if she watches the show or anything like that,

525
00:32:48,440 --> 00:32:51,440
Speaker 1: but yeah, I love to talk to her.

526
00:32:52,120 --> 00:32:55,560
Speaker 3: Okay, cool. I will check in with her about that

527
00:32:55,720 --> 00:32:56,480
Speaker 3: on Wednesday.

528
00:32:57,480 --> 00:32:58,600
Speaker 1: Do you have any siblings?

529
00:33:01,920 --> 00:33:02,920
Speaker 3: I have one sibling.

530
00:33:03,840 --> 00:33:07,160
Speaker 1: What's their relationship like with your mom or what's their

531
00:33:07,240 --> 00:33:08,120
Speaker 1: place in all of this?

532
00:33:13,080 --> 00:33:18,280
Speaker 3: Great question. She lives about five hours north of me,

533
00:33:19,600 --> 00:33:22,480
Speaker 3: and she goes to college up there, and she and

534
00:33:22,520 --> 00:33:26,440
Speaker 3: my mom also have a really good relationship. I don't

535
00:33:26,520 --> 00:33:33,720
Speaker 3: think it's at all similar in the like non traditional ways.

536
00:33:33,720 --> 00:33:37,000
Speaker 3: I think with her being in college and she's what

537
00:33:37,200 --> 00:33:44,320
Speaker 3: twenty I think she's twenty two, twenty three, I think

538
00:33:44,320 --> 00:33:49,320
Speaker 3: it just is more of that typical parent daughter relationship,

539
00:33:49,800 --> 00:33:53,040
Speaker 3: you know, call for advice and come visit for holidays

540
00:33:53,080 --> 00:33:57,920
Speaker 3: like she has. She stays in one of the guest

541
00:33:57,960 --> 00:33:59,800
Speaker 3: bedrooms when she's here, but like that used to be

542
00:33:59,800 --> 00:34:02,640
Speaker 3: her bedroom, So I think for her, the ideas are

543
00:34:02,680 --> 00:34:06,920
Speaker 3: still very typical parent daughter relationship.

544
00:34:07,640 --> 00:34:11,759
Speaker 1: How do you think she views your guys's relationship? Like

545
00:34:11,840 --> 00:34:16,439
Speaker 1: does she? And like is she? Do you think she's

546
00:34:16,600 --> 00:34:19,239
Speaker 1: envious and wants a kind of relationship like that? Do

547
00:34:19,320 --> 00:34:21,960
Speaker 1: you think she kind of is doing her own thing?

548
00:34:22,160 --> 00:34:24,440
Speaker 1: Like I guess what's your perspective on her perspective?

549
00:34:27,760 --> 00:34:32,040
Speaker 3: That's a really good question. I've never really talked to

550
00:34:32,080 --> 00:34:36,319
Speaker 3: her about it, but I don't I don't think there's

551
00:34:36,320 --> 00:34:38,560
Speaker 3: any like I've never gotten like bad vibes coming from

552
00:34:38,640 --> 00:34:40,759
Speaker 3: her about it. I think she views it as a

553
00:34:40,760 --> 00:34:45,000
Speaker 3: positive thing as well. I think that having one parent

554
00:34:45,239 --> 00:34:50,319
Speaker 3: also kind of plays into that, Like you're a lot

555
00:34:50,360 --> 00:34:53,920
Speaker 3: more willing to just accept your other parent that you

556
00:34:54,000 --> 00:34:56,760
Speaker 3: have last and just try and figure a way to

557
00:34:56,800 --> 00:34:58,960
Speaker 3: have that positive relationship, which is what she does.

558
00:34:59,000 --> 00:35:06,440
Speaker 5: Also, mm hmmm, what is.

559
00:35:06,440 --> 00:35:09,600
Speaker 1: Your name again? Alex? Alex, thank you for sharing all

560
00:35:09,640 --> 00:35:12,240
Speaker 1: of this stuff. This was really fascinating and I appreciate

561
00:35:12,320 --> 00:35:15,520
Speaker 1: you being really open and you know, telling us all

562
00:35:15,560 --> 00:35:18,200
Speaker 1: about it.

563
00:35:18,360 --> 00:35:18,760
Speaker 4: Awesome.

564
00:35:18,840 --> 00:35:20,440
Speaker 3: Yeah, it was really nice to talk to you. I

565
00:35:20,440 --> 00:35:22,920
Speaker 3: hope you have a good rest of the stream.

566
00:35:23,000 --> 00:35:24,400
Speaker 1: Is there anything else you want to say to the

567
00:35:24,400 --> 00:35:25,799
Speaker 1: people of the computer before we go?

568
00:35:27,719 --> 00:35:29,040
Speaker 3: I don't think so. Thank you.

569
00:35:29,719 --> 00:35:32,719
Speaker 1: Thank you, Alex. Yeah, that was fascinating. I really like,

570
00:35:34,480 --> 00:35:36,960
Speaker 1: I don't know you're It's funny the last time I

571
00:35:37,120 --> 00:35:40,600
Speaker 1: did ecstasy, I was thinking, I was like, what would

572
00:35:40,600 --> 00:35:43,879
Speaker 1: this be like to do with my family? I don't

573
00:35:43,920 --> 00:35:45,600
Speaker 1: know what I had that thought pop into my head,

574
00:35:45,600 --> 00:35:49,319
Speaker 1: but that's what I thought, or like, you know, to

575
00:35:49,360 --> 00:35:53,719
Speaker 1: do this with people who are like integral staples of

576
00:35:53,719 --> 00:36:00,040
Speaker 1: my life, because it's that's such a fucking space, you know,

577
00:36:00,160 --> 00:36:03,799
Speaker 1: being on on on ecstasy and like the the way

578
00:36:03,840 --> 00:36:08,640
Speaker 1: it makes you feel and be so open and not

579
00:36:08,760 --> 00:36:12,560
Speaker 1: in your head at all, there's be I think it'd

580
00:36:12,600 --> 00:36:14,640
Speaker 1: be an interesting space to be in with, you know,

581
00:36:14,719 --> 00:36:18,840
Speaker 1: someone like a parent I don't know, and yeah about

582
00:36:18,880 --> 00:36:21,640
Speaker 1: like the whole this whole idea of like normalcy, Like

583
00:36:21,680 --> 00:36:25,960
Speaker 1: what's normal? What's traditional? Like, yeah, it's probably not traditional

584
00:36:26,040 --> 00:36:34,359
Speaker 1: to fucking do mushrooms with your parents, but I you know, yeah,

585
00:36:34,400 --> 00:36:37,839
Speaker 1: when you get to that age, when you're like twenty nine,

586
00:36:37,840 --> 00:36:42,080
Speaker 1: when you're like your own fully grown adults, and so

587
00:36:42,320 --> 00:36:44,360
Speaker 1: is your parents, there is something to be said. I

588
00:36:44,360 --> 00:36:52,399
Speaker 1: think about like diving into this new relationship with them again,

589
00:36:52,480 --> 00:36:59,240
Speaker 1: seeing them as as something more than just your your parents.

590
00:36:59,600 --> 00:37:01,799
Speaker 1: And I do I do wonder. I wish I could

591
00:37:01,800 --> 00:37:03,360
Speaker 1: have gotten to talk to the mom, because I do

592
00:37:03,480 --> 00:37:07,319
Speaker 1: wonder what her perspective is on a lot of this

593
00:37:07,560 --> 00:37:11,239
Speaker 1: and how she kind of because that's a whole other thing,

594
00:37:11,360 --> 00:37:14,000
Speaker 1: right from her perspective, Like what's it like? You know,

595
00:37:14,120 --> 00:37:17,680
Speaker 1: you you you know, change this fucking kid's diaper, and

596
00:37:17,719 --> 00:37:20,640
Speaker 1: you saw her tripping around as a toddler, and now

597
00:37:20,680 --> 00:37:23,680
Speaker 1: you guys are doing mushrooms together. You've literally been with her,

598
00:37:23,719 --> 00:37:29,120
Speaker 1: you're entire you know, everything ish about her life. Now

599
00:37:29,160 --> 00:37:32,200
Speaker 1: you're entering this new lessia even that must be a

600
00:37:32,280 --> 00:37:39,400
Speaker 1: really fascinating experience for her mother, you know. So, I

601
00:37:39,400 --> 00:37:45,040
Speaker 1: don't know, this idea of normalcy is like it's making me, like,

602
00:37:45,160 --> 00:37:51,879
Speaker 1: it's making me think to what degree do does normalcy

603
00:37:53,000 --> 00:37:59,799
Speaker 1: or traditions, or a fear of breaking from that normal

604
00:38:00,320 --> 00:38:05,480
Speaker 1: in that tradition, To what degree does that fear prevent

605
00:38:05,560 --> 00:38:10,439
Speaker 1: you from having deep life experiences? Again, she talked about

606
00:38:10,440 --> 00:38:12,359
Speaker 1: when she was at the festival with her mom and

607
00:38:12,400 --> 00:38:15,319
Speaker 1: they were on some drugs and I think they were

608
00:38:15,360 --> 00:38:17,840
Speaker 1: on drugs. I forget I think she mentioned that, but yeah, whatever,

609
00:38:18,000 --> 00:38:20,759
Speaker 1: they were reading these affirmations to each other and holding

610
00:38:20,760 --> 00:38:23,680
Speaker 1: each other's hands, and it was like, what a beautiful

611
00:38:23,840 --> 00:38:28,320
Speaker 1: life moment? Could she have missed out on that moment

612
00:38:28,400 --> 00:38:33,120
Speaker 1: if she had this fear of having a non traditional

613
00:38:33,200 --> 00:38:38,080
Speaker 1: relationship with her mother. That's I don't know something I'm

614
00:38:38,120 --> 00:38:44,239
Speaker 1: thinking about. To what degree these you know, deviation, a

615
00:38:44,360 --> 00:38:50,000
Speaker 1: fear from deviating from what's always been and what's considered normal.

616
00:38:50,040 --> 00:38:54,480
Speaker 1: To what degree does that close you off from things?

617
00:38:55,239 --> 00:39:00,000
Speaker 1: I don't know? Hello, how can I help you to live?

618
00:38:59,800 --> 00:39:01,400
Speaker 5: I heard people say you sound different on here? You

619
00:39:01,440 --> 00:39:01,799
Speaker 5: really do?

620
00:39:01,840 --> 00:39:05,520
Speaker 1: It's it's odd, m Well, you know, I would say

621
00:39:05,520 --> 00:39:07,000
Speaker 1: you sound different, but I don't have any idea of

622
00:39:07,080 --> 00:39:08,879
Speaker 1: how you normally sound. What is your name?

623
00:39:09,400 --> 00:39:12,399
Speaker 5: That's fair? My name is ian Ian.

624
00:39:12,440 --> 00:39:13,120
Speaker 1: What's going on with you?

625
00:39:15,640 --> 00:39:19,399
Speaker 5: Well, I've been watching through your videos in Guatemala, and

626
00:39:19,719 --> 00:39:23,560
Speaker 5: that's hilarious and awesome, especially when you're calling yourself at

627
00:39:23,560 --> 00:39:23,960
Speaker 5: the toad.

628
00:39:24,840 --> 00:39:27,840
Speaker 1: Ah, yes, yes, I was doing that. What's what's what's

629
00:39:27,840 --> 00:39:28,400
Speaker 1: going on with you?

630
00:39:30,320 --> 00:39:33,839
Speaker 5: Well, I've actually been I've been learning Spanish myself, and

631
00:39:33,960 --> 00:39:38,640
Speaker 5: I've been thinking about leaving the country. But but there's

632
00:39:38,680 --> 00:39:40,239
Speaker 5: a lot of you know, there's a lot that goes

633
00:39:40,239 --> 00:39:42,560
Speaker 5: into that, and there's a lot of anxiety that goes

634
00:39:42,560 --> 00:39:43,160
Speaker 5: along with that.

635
00:39:44,600 --> 00:39:46,719
Speaker 1: Okay, what are you anxious about?

636
00:39:48,320 --> 00:39:51,200
Speaker 5: Well, you know, I love my family and I don't

637
00:39:51,239 --> 00:39:55,359
Speaker 5: necessarily want to leave them behind, but I do want

638
00:39:55,400 --> 00:39:56,880
Speaker 5: to have my own experiences.

639
00:39:58,480 --> 00:40:01,680
Speaker 1: And are you are is this is this specifically about

640
00:40:01,680 --> 00:40:04,879
Speaker 1: traveling alone?

641
00:40:05,239 --> 00:40:05,680
Speaker 5: Uh?

642
00:40:06,080 --> 00:40:11,279
Speaker 1: Well yeah, Okay, where are you planning on traveling to

643
00:40:11,360 --> 00:40:12,440
Speaker 1: that you're afraid to go to?

644
00:40:15,200 --> 00:40:19,000
Speaker 5: Uh? Well, I hadn't thought about Guatemala until I watched

645
00:40:19,000 --> 00:40:22,319
Speaker 5: your videos, and that seems like a good option. But

646
00:40:23,000 --> 00:40:27,320
Speaker 5: I had just been thinking about like Argentina or maybe

647
00:40:27,640 --> 00:40:28,480
Speaker 5: somewhere in Mexico.

648
00:40:29,719 --> 00:40:33,960
Speaker 1: Mm hmmm. And you were thinking about a quick trip

649
00:40:34,080 --> 00:40:36,160
Speaker 1: or you were thinking about something that's months long. What

650
00:40:36,160 --> 00:40:40,680
Speaker 1: what tell me your tell me your ideal travels that

651
00:40:40,760 --> 00:40:41,759
Speaker 1: you are afraid to do.

652
00:40:43,560 --> 00:40:49,160
Speaker 5: M I guess I'm really thinking about becoming an expat.

653
00:40:50,400 --> 00:40:54,560
Speaker 5: I kind of just want to relocate and start afresh.

654
00:40:55,160 --> 00:40:57,640
Speaker 1: Okay, So we're talking about leaving your family. Leaving your

655
00:40:57,640 --> 00:40:59,120
Speaker 1: family not for the weekend.

656
00:40:58,800 --> 00:41:00,960
Speaker 5: But yeah, for life.

657
00:41:01,040 --> 00:41:05,120
Speaker 1: Okay, we're talking about leaving. We are talking about nuking

658
00:41:05,360 --> 00:41:10,319
Speaker 1: your life, quitting your job, murdering your family or just

659
00:41:10,440 --> 00:41:13,080
Speaker 1: or you don't have to murder them, but leaving them

660
00:41:13,120 --> 00:41:20,840
Speaker 1: behind and going to Mexico and starting a new yes, okay, okay,

661
00:41:21,160 --> 00:41:23,840
Speaker 1: all right, that's a different conversation than just doing a

662
00:41:23,880 --> 00:41:27,120
Speaker 1: little solo travels here and there. Why do you feel

663
00:41:27,160 --> 00:41:31,080
Speaker 1: inclined to start a new life. What is exciting to

664
00:41:31,120 --> 00:41:35,480
Speaker 1: you about that prospect?

665
00:41:35,760 --> 00:41:39,520
Speaker 5: Well, I mean, I've always wanted to travel other places,

666
00:41:39,640 --> 00:41:42,600
Speaker 5: and I'm a big practicing Spanish for about a year now,

667
00:41:42,600 --> 00:41:45,600
Speaker 5: so I definitely want to focus somewhere that speaks Spanish.

668
00:41:45,680 --> 00:41:51,359
Speaker 5: But I don't really have a lot holding me here

669
00:41:51,400 --> 00:41:57,680
Speaker 5: besides my family. Like I'm twenty eight and I don't

670
00:41:57,680 --> 00:41:59,759
Speaker 5: really like have much beside my dog.

671
00:42:00,320 --> 00:42:03,760
Speaker 1: You know, Well, do you have your family, have kids?

672
00:42:05,600 --> 00:42:08,360
Speaker 5: No? No, like my my parents and my brother.

673
00:42:08,600 --> 00:42:15,120
Speaker 1: Oh okay, all right, all right, yeah, it's different. I

674
00:42:15,120 --> 00:42:17,640
Speaker 1: thought you thought that. I was like, well, you know,

675
00:42:17,680 --> 00:42:19,359
Speaker 1: it's one thing too, because you can't. I mean, look,

676
00:42:19,400 --> 00:42:22,960
Speaker 1: it's one thing to leave your you leave your children behind.

677
00:42:23,280 --> 00:42:25,799
Speaker 1: You know, no, but you can leave it. It's very

678
00:42:25,800 --> 00:42:29,799
Speaker 1: it's normal to leave your parents behind. Everyone usual. A

679
00:42:29,800 --> 00:42:31,480
Speaker 1: lot of people do that. A lot of people leave

680
00:42:31,520 --> 00:42:34,399
Speaker 1: their parents' house and start a new life. But you're

681
00:42:34,440 --> 00:42:37,040
Speaker 1: a dick if it's your kids.

682
00:42:37,600 --> 00:42:39,879
Speaker 5: Yeah, and see I actually moved out of my parents'

683
00:42:39,920 --> 00:42:42,920
Speaker 5: house when I was sixteen, and like, I moved to

684
00:42:42,960 --> 00:42:47,600
Speaker 5: Colorado and then I ended up in Illinois, and I

685
00:42:47,680 --> 00:42:50,360
Speaker 5: like I got really homesick and Illinois up ended up

686
00:42:50,400 --> 00:42:54,400
Speaker 5: coming back to Utah, and like, I really love my

687
00:42:54,520 --> 00:42:56,680
Speaker 5: family of a lot.

688
00:42:56,920 --> 00:43:00,360
Speaker 1: Okay, so you're twenty eight and you're thinking about starting

689
00:43:00,400 --> 00:43:07,560
Speaker 1: anew in Mexico. Yeah, is there other Is there any

690
00:43:07,640 --> 00:43:13,240
Speaker 1: other aspect or thing that would prevent you from going,

691
00:43:13,640 --> 00:43:16,279
Speaker 1: aside from just you don't want to be away from

692
00:43:16,280 --> 00:43:20,000
Speaker 1: your parents.

693
00:43:21,440 --> 00:43:23,200
Speaker 5: I mean, I am the manager of where I work,

694
00:43:23,280 --> 00:43:25,960
Speaker 5: but that's not like a huge thing. They can find

695
00:43:26,000 --> 00:43:26,800
Speaker 5: another manager.

696
00:43:27,000 --> 00:43:32,880
Speaker 1: But yeah, I also don't think that what are you

697
00:43:33,000 --> 00:43:33,560
Speaker 1: the manager of?

698
00:43:35,440 --> 00:43:39,719
Speaker 5: So I work for a charity organization we take in

699
00:43:39,800 --> 00:43:41,040
Speaker 5: clothing donations.

700
00:43:41,160 --> 00:43:46,000
Speaker 1: And yeah, okay, well what would you want to do

701
00:43:46,040 --> 00:43:47,360
Speaker 1: if you moved to Mexico?

702
00:43:51,680 --> 00:43:55,480
Speaker 5: I mean I could be a cook, I could, I

703
00:43:55,480 --> 00:44:00,839
Speaker 5: could work on a farm. I I could, I don't know,

704
00:44:02,200 --> 00:44:03,040
Speaker 5: be a beach bum.

705
00:44:04,640 --> 00:44:07,439
Speaker 1: Well listen, I'm gonna I'm gonna say a few things

706
00:44:07,440 --> 00:44:10,200
Speaker 1: about this. First of all, despite what I said earlier,

707
00:44:10,239 --> 00:44:12,759
Speaker 1: you don't actually have to kill your family to leave them.

708
00:44:13,160 --> 00:44:16,480
Speaker 1: You can just simply leave and they will still be alive.

709
00:44:17,239 --> 00:44:20,920
Speaker 1: You can still call your mound, you can still call

710
00:44:20,960 --> 00:44:23,319
Speaker 1: your mother, you can still call your father. You can

711
00:44:23,320 --> 00:44:28,480
Speaker 1: actually even still go from Mexico back to the United

712
00:44:28,520 --> 00:44:33,040
Speaker 1: States to see them. Are you are they older?

713
00:44:35,560 --> 00:44:37,439
Speaker 5: They are like a little over.

714
00:44:37,400 --> 00:44:41,279
Speaker 1: Fifty, a little over fifty. Okay, have you stayed have you?

715
00:44:41,880 --> 00:44:44,480
Speaker 1: What state do you live in?

716
00:44:44,600 --> 00:44:44,920
Speaker 5: Utah?

717
00:44:45,719 --> 00:44:46,919
Speaker 1: Okay? How long have you lived in Utah?

718
00:44:47,000 --> 00:44:54,680
Speaker 5: For? It's kind of a weird conglomeration because I've moved

719
00:44:54,719 --> 00:44:58,360
Speaker 5: so much in total, probably nineteen years.

720
00:44:58,719 --> 00:45:00,279
Speaker 1: Okay, so you moved a lot. So I was going

721
00:45:00,320 --> 00:45:02,000
Speaker 1: to ask you, is have you done a lot of traveling?

722
00:45:02,080 --> 00:45:05,440
Speaker 1: I mean we're talking about completely you're talking about moving

723
00:45:05,680 --> 00:45:08,560
Speaker 1: to a new place. Have you even visited other places

724
00:45:08,560 --> 00:45:09,400
Speaker 1: outside of the US.

725
00:45:10,840 --> 00:45:13,759
Speaker 5: I have never had a passport or anything. I've never

726
00:45:13,760 --> 00:45:15,080
Speaker 5: been outside of the US.

727
00:45:15,760 --> 00:45:17,000
Speaker 1: Do you have a passport right now?

728
00:45:18,560 --> 00:45:19,120
Speaker 5: I don't.

729
00:45:19,880 --> 00:45:25,359
Speaker 1: Okay, that's an issue, so I don't Usually I'm I'm

730
00:45:25,400 --> 00:45:27,680
Speaker 1: doing a new thing where I'm trying not to tell

731
00:45:27,719 --> 00:45:29,840
Speaker 1: people what to do. I'm gonna tell you what to do.

732
00:45:30,600 --> 00:45:31,080
Speaker 1: Is that okay?

733
00:45:33,160 --> 00:45:33,399
Speaker 5: Yeah?

734
00:45:33,520 --> 00:45:37,640
Speaker 1: Yeah, okay, I think it would be a good I'm

735
00:45:37,640 --> 00:45:38,759
Speaker 1: not gonna tell you what to do. I'm gonna tell

736
00:45:38,760 --> 00:45:40,080
Speaker 1: you what what. I'm not going to tell you what

737
00:45:40,120 --> 00:45:41,520
Speaker 1: to do. I'm gonna tell you what I think would

738
00:45:41,560 --> 00:45:45,640
Speaker 1: be a good idea. I think it would be a

739
00:45:45,760 --> 00:45:51,440
Speaker 1: good idea for you to take a trip. Do you

740
00:45:51,480 --> 00:45:52,680
Speaker 1: have a little bit of money saved up?

741
00:45:54,640 --> 00:45:54,879
Speaker 5: Yeah?

742
00:45:55,840 --> 00:45:58,640
Speaker 1: Okay. Are you able to get time off of your job?

743
00:46:00,480 --> 00:46:07,000
Speaker 1: I definitely, you said, definitely, Okay, great, take a trip.

744
00:46:07,640 --> 00:46:11,840
Speaker 1: Don't because I think jumping to the grand fantasy of

745
00:46:13,000 --> 00:46:19,520
Speaker 1: completely abandoning your life and starting a new attractive fantasy,

746
00:46:20,680 --> 00:46:25,040
Speaker 1: we don't know what the reality looks like. Not to

747
00:46:25,080 --> 00:46:28,840
Speaker 1: say that the reality wouldn't be similarly attractive. I'm not

748
00:46:28,840 --> 00:46:32,319
Speaker 1: gonna say you shouldn't do it. But if you've never

749
00:46:32,480 --> 00:46:35,560
Speaker 1: even if you've never even gone on a trip by

750
00:46:35,600 --> 00:46:39,040
Speaker 1: yourself to a foreign country and fucked around there for like,

751
00:46:40,080 --> 00:46:45,360
Speaker 1: you know, a week or two a weekend, even then,

752
00:46:47,360 --> 00:46:51,799
Speaker 1: go do that, because obviously there's something within you, some

753
00:46:52,000 --> 00:46:58,000
Speaker 1: desire to get out there and explore and have a

754
00:46:58,080 --> 00:47:04,440
Speaker 1: psychedelic experience of a life outside of your routine of

755
00:47:05,080 --> 00:47:08,080
Speaker 1: you know, gathering clothes and hanging out with your parents,

756
00:47:10,120 --> 00:47:12,040
Speaker 1: which is a good desire to have. It's good. Well,

757
00:47:12,120 --> 00:47:14,040
Speaker 1: we're a lot, you're alive, You're gonna be dead at

758
00:47:14,040 --> 00:47:16,600
Speaker 1: some point. You should go out and do things. I

759
00:47:16,640 --> 00:47:21,839
Speaker 1: think hmmm, and I think you think that too. I'm

760
00:47:21,840 --> 00:47:23,120
Speaker 1: not just saying that because I think I think you

761
00:47:23,160 --> 00:47:25,040
Speaker 1: think that too. That's why you're on the phone with

762
00:47:25,120 --> 00:47:26,760
Speaker 1: a Get Go talking about whether or not you should

763
00:47:26,760 --> 00:47:31,680
Speaker 1: abandon your life. So it would be a good idea

764
00:47:32,600 --> 00:47:37,560
Speaker 1: to take a trip before you abandon everything.

765
00:47:41,560 --> 00:47:43,160
Speaker 5: Yeah, that makes a lot of sense.

766
00:47:44,120 --> 00:47:45,360
Speaker 1: Okay, what do you want to take a trip to?

767
00:47:45,440 --> 00:47:46,919
Speaker 1: Where are we're going? Can I come?

768
00:47:49,160 --> 00:47:51,440
Speaker 5: I mean I would that sounds amazing.

769
00:47:52,239 --> 00:47:58,440
Speaker 1: I count as a lap pet a cage. Where do

770
00:47:58,440 --> 00:47:58,880
Speaker 1: you want to go?

771
00:48:01,719 --> 00:48:02,279
Speaker 5: Argentina?

772
00:48:03,000 --> 00:48:08,279
Speaker 1: Argentina? Okay, what's stopping you from going?

773
00:48:08,320 --> 00:48:13,960
Speaker 5: There. Uh, just that I haven't done it.

774
00:48:15,960 --> 00:48:18,200
Speaker 1: Actually, wait, I actually know the answer. I forgot. I forgot.

775
00:48:18,239 --> 00:48:19,920
Speaker 1: You don't have a passport. You need to do that

776
00:48:21,000 --> 00:48:23,239
Speaker 1: as go get a passport. Do you know how to

777
00:48:23,239 --> 00:48:23,960
Speaker 1: get a passport?

778
00:48:25,680 --> 00:48:27,239
Speaker 5: I think you just go to the post office, right

779
00:48:27,320 --> 00:48:29,160
Speaker 5: and like sell out some day work, get a picture.

780
00:48:29,719 --> 00:48:32,200
Speaker 1: Okay, let's ye, that's that's that sounds about right. Okay,

781
00:48:32,200 --> 00:48:35,040
Speaker 1: go do that. Go do that and then go to Argentina.

782
00:48:35,160 --> 00:48:36,560
Speaker 1: Just do it if you can get if you cause

783
00:48:36,600 --> 00:48:37,960
Speaker 1: when I asked you if you can get time off

784
00:48:38,000 --> 00:48:40,960
Speaker 1: work you said definitely, So I know you can do it.

785
00:48:41,440 --> 00:48:42,640
Speaker 5: Yeah, get your.

786
00:48:42,480 --> 00:48:46,120
Speaker 1: Time off of work. Go to Argentina for a week.

787
00:48:46,160 --> 00:48:47,200
Speaker 1: Do you know what a hostel is?

788
00:48:49,320 --> 00:48:51,720
Speaker 5: Uh? Yeah, I've I've heard of them.

789
00:48:51,880 --> 00:48:55,720
Speaker 1: Okay, this is not an ad. Go to hosteleworld dot

790
00:48:55,760 --> 00:49:01,480
Speaker 1: com search for hostels in Argentina and go book a

791
00:49:01,520 --> 00:49:05,360
Speaker 1: week at a hostel. Go there by yourself. Pack a

792
00:49:05,360 --> 00:49:10,279
Speaker 1: little bag, put some clothes and a toothbrush and some

793
00:49:10,320 --> 00:49:14,919
Speaker 1: ship in a bag. Book a plane ticket. Make sure

794
00:49:14,920 --> 00:49:17,279
Speaker 1: you get your fucking passport and ship because you want

795
00:49:17,280 --> 00:49:19,160
Speaker 1: to show without a passport, and go stay in a

796
00:49:19,160 --> 00:49:22,560
Speaker 1: hostel in Argentina for a week and go into go

797
00:49:22,600 --> 00:49:25,680
Speaker 1: into the lobby of the hostel, go up to someone

798
00:49:26,760 --> 00:49:29,319
Speaker 1: and start just start talking to them, and they'll talk

799
00:49:29,360 --> 00:49:31,759
Speaker 1: back to you, and other people will come and they'll

800
00:49:31,760 --> 00:49:33,759
Speaker 1: start talking to you too, And then you guys can

801
00:49:33,840 --> 00:49:37,640
Speaker 1: go out and drink somewhere, or go look at a

802
00:49:37,680 --> 00:49:42,399
Speaker 1: cool statue of something. You'll have fun.

803
00:49:42,560 --> 00:49:45,960
Speaker 5: I was actually curious what kind of I was curious

804
00:49:45,960 --> 00:49:49,560
Speaker 5: what kind of preparation you did before you went to Guatemala, Like,

805
00:49:49,760 --> 00:49:51,880
Speaker 5: did you like look it up a lot online?

806
00:49:51,920 --> 00:49:57,880
Speaker 1: And I did very little. I was having an EXISTENTI

807
00:49:58,120 --> 00:49:59,560
Speaker 1: I talked about this in the in that video that

808
00:49:59,560 --> 00:50:04,040
Speaker 1: you were watch. I had an existential crisis, and I

809
00:50:04,080 --> 00:50:05,640
Speaker 1: realized I looked at him. You know, you know what

810
00:50:05,719 --> 00:50:07,840
Speaker 1: I did. I looked at my I looked at a map.

811
00:50:09,000 --> 00:50:12,840
Speaker 1: I went to Google Maps, and I looked at where

812
00:50:12,880 --> 00:50:16,040
Speaker 1: I am on the map, and I realized that I

813
00:50:16,280 --> 00:50:21,239
Speaker 1: very seldom leave. I looked at the whole map and

814
00:50:21,360 --> 00:50:23,200
Speaker 1: I and I looked at all these places. I looked

815
00:50:23,200 --> 00:50:27,720
Speaker 1: at how fast the world was, and then I looked

816
00:50:28,560 --> 00:50:32,280
Speaker 1: at where I am on the map, and I realized,

817
00:50:32,360 --> 00:50:39,759
Speaker 1: I very seldomly leave a really tiny radius.

818
00:50:41,560 --> 00:50:46,040
Speaker 6: Yeah, and I have no idea when I'm going to

819
00:50:46,120 --> 00:50:49,960
Speaker 6: die and I want to see stuff, so I should

820
00:50:50,000 --> 00:50:53,920
Speaker 6: just start going and looking at stuff and getting.

821
00:50:53,680 --> 00:50:57,919
Speaker 1: Out of that radius. It gets good. Good, I'm glad

822
00:50:57,920 --> 00:51:01,279
Speaker 1: you are. And so I was like, I just need

823
00:51:01,280 --> 00:51:02,760
Speaker 1: to get out of the radius. And so I booked

824
00:51:02,760 --> 00:51:07,040
Speaker 1: the flight and I went on TikTok and I searched

825
00:51:07,680 --> 00:51:13,319
Speaker 1: things to do and in Tiwaguanamala and I did a

826
00:51:13,360 --> 00:51:16,080
Speaker 1: couple of them. But the real but but but to me,

827
00:51:16,239 --> 00:51:24,040
Speaker 1: the real adventures uh lied in just talking to random

828
00:51:24,080 --> 00:51:26,799
Speaker 1: people at the hostel and the folks you beat doing

829
00:51:26,880 --> 00:51:32,440
Speaker 1: that walk it of course, you know, my my gecko

830
00:51:33,200 --> 00:51:36,200
Speaker 1: videos get me into some adventures. I go out dressed

831
00:51:36,239 --> 00:51:38,840
Speaker 1: like this and people just start talking to me. But

832
00:51:39,000 --> 00:51:41,520
Speaker 1: I find, you know, adventures even when I'm not wearing

833
00:51:41,520 --> 00:51:44,600
Speaker 1: the gecko costume, because because I was willing to go

834
00:51:44,640 --> 00:51:47,680
Speaker 1: talk to some guy at my hostel bar and then

835
00:51:47,719 --> 00:51:49,560
Speaker 1: we go out to some place and start talking to

836
00:51:49,600 --> 00:51:51,359
Speaker 1: this person and these things. Just if you just put

837
00:51:51,400 --> 00:51:55,400
Speaker 1: yourself in position for things to happen, and you're willing

838
00:51:55,440 --> 00:51:57,320
Speaker 1: to talk to folks, you can get into some interesting

839
00:51:57,400 --> 00:52:01,480
Speaker 1: things and another interesting It really doesn't matter how old

840
00:52:01,480 --> 00:52:04,560
Speaker 1: you are either because there's people of all ages going

841
00:52:04,600 --> 00:52:09,760
Speaker 1: around and doing this. So if it if it interests

842
00:52:09,840 --> 00:52:12,920
Speaker 1: you at all to go out and find adventure, I

843
00:52:13,160 --> 00:52:15,440
Speaker 1: I heavily encourage you to do it, especially because you

844
00:52:15,520 --> 00:52:17,640
Speaker 1: answered definitely when I asked if you get time off?

845
00:52:23,880 --> 00:52:27,759
Speaker 5: M Yeah, that's that's a lot to think about, and

846
00:52:27,800 --> 00:52:32,919
Speaker 5: I definitely appreciate the encouragement. I you know, I guess

847
00:52:32,960 --> 00:52:34,200
Speaker 5: I don't talk to a lot of people in general.

848
00:52:34,200 --> 00:52:36,040
Speaker 5: I'm gonna say I don't talk to people about this.

849
00:52:36,120 --> 00:52:37,640
Speaker 5: I don't really talk a lot in general. I just

850
00:52:37,680 --> 00:52:39,480
Speaker 5: kind of work and that's it.

851
00:52:39,600 --> 00:52:43,600
Speaker 1: So, uh, you got like a Walter thought on.

852
00:52:45,120 --> 00:52:45,560
Speaker 5: What now?

853
00:52:46,160 --> 00:52:47,680
Speaker 1: Well, you know they ever see the movie The Secret

854
00:52:47,680 --> 00:52:51,759
Speaker 1: Life of Walter Mitty? Oh No, is that a dick

855
00:52:51,800 --> 00:52:53,279
Speaker 1: thing to say to someone that they have a Walter

856
00:52:53,360 --> 00:52:56,000
Speaker 1: Midi thing. I think it's a compliment because I'm like

857
00:52:56,160 --> 00:52:59,480
Speaker 1: imagining you going on all these Walter Midia adventures.

858
00:53:00,280 --> 00:53:03,160
Speaker 5: I don't know what it means, but started coming from you,

859
00:53:03,200 --> 00:53:04,240
Speaker 5: I'll take it as a compliment.

860
00:53:05,360 --> 00:53:11,200
Speaker 1: I like that. Why don't you talk to a lot

861
00:53:11,200 --> 00:53:11,560
Speaker 1: of people.

862
00:53:14,160 --> 00:53:17,600
Speaker 5: I've just been my routine, you know. I graduated in

863
00:53:17,840 --> 00:53:19,840
Speaker 5: twenty twelve and have been working.

864
00:53:19,640 --> 00:53:22,440
Speaker 1: Since Okay, because let me ask you this final question.

865
00:53:22,719 --> 00:53:28,279
Speaker 1: Since you graduated in twenty twelve, before that, when you

866
00:53:28,280 --> 00:53:30,880
Speaker 1: were in high school and college and middle school, did

867
00:53:30,880 --> 00:53:31,480
Speaker 1: you talk to people?

868
00:53:34,160 --> 00:53:39,799
Speaker 5: Uh? Yeah, yeah, I guess I mean, yeah, when you're

869
00:53:39,840 --> 00:53:41,839
Speaker 5: in school, Yeah, I kind of have to. And but yeah,

870
00:53:41,880 --> 00:53:44,360
Speaker 5: this is definitely more social in that setting.

871
00:53:45,239 --> 00:54:02,200
Speaker 7: But yeah, I think that the the the solo travel

872
00:54:03,000 --> 00:54:06,880
Speaker 7: setting is very similar, right where it's like you have

873
00:54:06,960 --> 00:54:08,120
Speaker 7: to so you do.

874
00:54:09,880 --> 00:54:15,760
Speaker 1: Yeah, what's your name again?

875
00:54:17,280 --> 00:54:17,560
Speaker 5: Ian?

876
00:54:18,640 --> 00:54:21,120
Speaker 1: Ian? Ian? Is there anything else you want to say

877
00:54:21,120 --> 00:54:23,120
Speaker 1: to me or to God or to SpongeBob or to

878
00:54:23,120 --> 00:54:24,440
Speaker 1: the people of the computer before we go.

879
00:54:27,600 --> 00:54:31,960
Speaker 5: Called the SpongeBob. I'm an atheist, and you know I

880
00:54:31,960 --> 00:54:33,520
Speaker 5: love you and just keep doing what you're doing.

881
00:54:34,520 --> 00:54:37,879
Speaker 1: My mother fucking love you too. Ian. Good luck. Let

882
00:54:37,880 --> 00:54:39,920
Speaker 1: me know if you if you if you end up

883
00:54:39,960 --> 00:54:42,520
Speaker 1: actually going to Argentina, send me a d M. I

884
00:54:42,520 --> 00:54:43,759
Speaker 1: want to know if you actually did it.

885
00:54:45,200 --> 00:54:46,520
Speaker 5: Hell yeah, send me.

886
00:54:46,480 --> 00:54:49,959
Speaker 1: A fucking photo of you. I want in three months

887
00:54:49,960 --> 00:54:52,200
Speaker 1: from now, when you get your passport, I want to

888
00:54:52,200 --> 00:54:52,920
Speaker 1: see that photo.

889
00:54:54,600 --> 00:54:56,520
Speaker 5: All right, I'm gonna go get my passport. I'm working

890
00:54:56,560 --> 00:54:56,839
Speaker 5: on it.

891
00:54:57,080 --> 00:54:59,879
Speaker 1: I'm doing good, okay, good, all right, thank you Ian,

892
00:55:01,640 --> 00:55:04,319
Speaker 1: Thank you. I am so fucked if that guy dies

893
00:55:04,360 --> 00:55:09,920
Speaker 1: in Argentina, like like you know those people, you know,

894
00:55:09,960 --> 00:55:13,680
Speaker 1: those people who like takes, who like die because they

895
00:55:13,680 --> 00:55:18,759
Speaker 1: fell off of a cliff taking a selfie. I feel

896
00:55:18,760 --> 00:55:20,680
Speaker 1: like he's gonna be like trying to take a selfie

897
00:55:20,760 --> 00:55:24,120
Speaker 1: on a mountain to send to me and he's gonna die.

898
00:55:24,640 --> 00:55:26,960
Speaker 1: I'm not I'm I'm not putting that out into the universe,

899
00:55:27,040 --> 00:55:37,000
Speaker 1: but okay, anyway, let's move on. Hello, Hello, how are you?

900
00:55:39,239 --> 00:55:39,840
Speaker 4: I'm fine?

901
00:55:39,840 --> 00:55:40,520
Speaker 5: How are you doing?

902
00:55:41,840 --> 00:55:47,799
Speaker 1: I'm doing all right. How can I get you today?

903
00:55:49,200 --> 00:55:49,560
Speaker 3: Uh?

904
00:55:49,600 --> 00:55:56,400
Speaker 4: Well, so sorry, I'm watching in a dark room. I

905
00:55:56,520 --> 00:56:00,319
Speaker 4: was just calling. I listened to your show a bit,

906
00:56:01,160 --> 00:56:03,960
Speaker 4: and I like, I hear a lot of folks kind

907
00:56:03,960 --> 00:56:07,319
Speaker 4: of in their twenties and feeling like things are down

908
00:56:07,360 --> 00:56:11,719
Speaker 4: and out. But I'm in my thirties and I just

909
00:56:11,800 --> 00:56:14,960
Speaker 4: wanted to, I guess, give a bit of experience on

910
00:56:15,120 --> 00:56:16,480
Speaker 4: how it can all be okay.

911
00:56:17,640 --> 00:56:21,000
Speaker 1: I'd love to hear that. How how how can I

912
00:56:21,080 --> 00:56:23,840
Speaker 1: be okay? You know, everyone thinks that I'm here to

913
00:56:23,840 --> 00:56:27,000
Speaker 1: give people advice, but I'm I'm so much more interested

914
00:56:27,080 --> 00:56:30,400
Speaker 1: in taking it than I am and giving it a

915
00:56:30,920 --> 00:56:33,000
Speaker 1: that sounds well, sex, I'm gonna let you talk. I

916
00:56:33,040 --> 00:56:34,160
Speaker 1: did those stupid.

917
00:56:36,200 --> 00:56:39,680
Speaker 4: No no this is great. Well, first of all, I

918
00:56:39,680 --> 00:56:43,640
Speaker 4: think that you're probably doing it right if you're doing

919
00:56:43,680 --> 00:56:49,359
Speaker 4: something that you love, and I guess the main thing

920
00:56:50,320 --> 00:56:54,239
Speaker 4: is saying yes to things that are positive, or saying

921
00:56:54,280 --> 00:56:59,120
Speaker 4: yes to things that come into chants and not pushing

922
00:56:59,160 --> 00:57:06,920
Speaker 4: them aside because you can't. So when I was in

923
00:57:07,000 --> 00:57:13,200
Speaker 4: high school in early twenties, I did some drugs and

924
00:57:13,400 --> 00:57:19,240
Speaker 4: kind of did some people wrong, and the best step

925
00:57:19,280 --> 00:57:22,840
Speaker 4: I ever made was to say yes to the option

926
00:57:23,000 --> 00:57:26,439
Speaker 4: to move from that city I was living in and

927
00:57:28,800 --> 00:57:33,160
Speaker 4: say yes to software drugs then like pot instead of

928
00:57:33,200 --> 00:57:38,520
Speaker 4: the other things. And then, of course things are roller coasters.

929
00:57:38,520 --> 00:57:41,920
Speaker 4: They don't always go well. I tried college, but that

930
00:57:42,120 --> 00:57:45,040
Speaker 4: wasn't great for my attentions. Then I think I've done

931
00:57:46,080 --> 00:57:53,240
Speaker 4: a total of ten different industries in my life. But yeah,

932
00:57:53,760 --> 00:57:57,720
Speaker 4: it's just been kind of kind of the philosophy after

933
00:57:58,480 --> 00:58:02,720
Speaker 4: getting all of that out, of all that, just kind

934
00:58:02,760 --> 00:58:05,680
Speaker 4: of getting rid of what ails me or what doesn't

935
00:58:05,760 --> 00:58:10,400
Speaker 4: serve me, and then not being afraid to say yes.

936
00:58:10,560 --> 00:58:14,160
Speaker 4: I'm constantly afraid I shouldn't say that, but at least

937
00:58:14,240 --> 00:58:18,240
Speaker 4: like noticing it's a fear and counteracting it.

938
00:58:18,560 --> 00:58:21,400
Speaker 1: So your life has been improved by saying no to

939
00:58:21,480 --> 00:58:25,440
Speaker 1: hard drugs and yes to soft drugs.

940
00:58:26,480 --> 00:58:28,520
Speaker 4: Yeah, well, I don't know if that's that's not the

941
00:58:28,560 --> 00:58:33,880
Speaker 4: whole thing. Maybe saying that's a that's a that's one set.

942
00:58:34,320 --> 00:58:34,520
Speaker 3: No.

943
00:58:34,600 --> 00:58:38,200
Speaker 1: I think I assue where you're coming from. Your no.

944
00:58:38,280 --> 00:58:40,640
Speaker 1: I think I see where you're coming from. You're just like, hey,

945
00:58:41,320 --> 00:58:45,200
Speaker 1: you know, there's a lot to gain by uh, saying

946
00:58:45,320 --> 00:58:50,600
Speaker 1: yes to the opportunities that present themselves to you within reason.

947
00:58:50,840 --> 00:58:55,640
Speaker 4: Yeah, totally saying no to bad people, saying yes to

948
00:58:55,680 --> 00:58:56,680
Speaker 4: people that are honest.

949
00:58:56,720 --> 00:59:01,520
Speaker 1: And so tell me what in your life today? In

950
00:59:01,560 --> 00:59:04,040
Speaker 1: your life, now, what's something recently you said yes to

951
00:59:04,160 --> 00:59:06,400
Speaker 1: that you maybe weren't going to, but you did and

952
00:59:06,400 --> 00:59:07,000
Speaker 1: it worked out.

953
00:59:12,200 --> 00:59:18,440
Speaker 4: So I guess it's a few years ago now. But

954
00:59:18,560 --> 00:59:21,520
Speaker 4: I went back to school when I was thirty. I

955
00:59:21,560 --> 00:59:23,360
Speaker 4: was kind of just doing it to just get out

956
00:59:23,360 --> 00:59:28,280
Speaker 4: and get a job. But in the process of that,

957
00:59:29,440 --> 00:59:35,800
Speaker 4: one of the my professors, she was really kind and open,

958
00:59:35,920 --> 00:59:40,240
Speaker 4: and she basically I had this problem. I had this

959
00:59:40,400 --> 00:59:43,160
Speaker 4: problem in this internship that I was possibly going to

960
00:59:43,240 --> 00:59:45,840
Speaker 4: try out. But I've never studied the subject before, and

961
00:59:46,720 --> 00:59:48,440
Speaker 4: she told me just to talk to this guy, and

962
00:59:48,600 --> 00:59:50,640
Speaker 4: she was kind of like the cool guy teacher on

963
00:59:50,760 --> 00:59:54,160
Speaker 4: campus or whatever. So I was a little bit afraid,

964
00:59:54,200 --> 00:59:58,760
Speaker 4: and I've never even worked in the subject before. So finally,

965
00:59:58,800 --> 01:00:01,840
Speaker 4: after months and months of her telling me to, I

966
01:00:01,960 --> 01:00:07,120
Speaker 4: just went and talked to him. And ever since then,

967
01:00:07,760 --> 01:00:10,800
Speaker 4: like he'll approach a project and I've been working with

968
01:00:10,880 --> 01:00:15,000
Speaker 4: him and something new and exciting will come out of it.

969
01:00:15,000 --> 01:00:18,880
Speaker 4: It was first it was I got a cool scholarship,

970
01:00:19,040 --> 01:00:23,240
Speaker 4: and then I ended up being able to travel and

971
01:00:23,600 --> 01:00:26,320
Speaker 4: go overseas for a while, and that was pretty cool,

972
01:00:27,720 --> 01:00:29,520
Speaker 4: and so I just kind of had to get over

973
01:00:29,560 --> 01:00:32,320
Speaker 4: the fear of just talking to somebody about something I

974
01:00:32,360 --> 01:00:36,520
Speaker 4: didn't know. And then yeah, and then it's all worked

975
01:00:36,520 --> 01:00:40,400
Speaker 4: out pretty well. And so it's six seven years later,

976
01:00:40,480 --> 01:00:44,040
Speaker 4: and I feel like I feel like there's still opportunities.

977
01:00:44,200 --> 01:00:46,360
Speaker 4: There's still ways I can suck it up, for sure,

978
01:00:46,600 --> 01:00:49,040
Speaker 4: and I have to fight myself on that one.

979
01:00:49,280 --> 01:00:52,520
Speaker 1: But well, listen, thanks for calling in and you know,

980
01:00:52,640 --> 01:01:00,320
Speaker 1: giving us, you know that that that perspective. Is there

981
01:01:00,400 --> 01:01:02,280
Speaker 1: kind of anything else you wanted to add to this

982
01:01:02,560 --> 01:01:04,760
Speaker 1: or or say to the people before we go?

983
01:01:05,520 --> 01:01:09,800
Speaker 4: I guess. Just be kind to yourself. Know that no

984
01:01:09,920 --> 01:01:12,920
Speaker 4: decision is final, but as long as you're looking out

985
01:01:12,920 --> 01:01:15,040
Speaker 4: for you and yours and it's gonna be okay.

986
01:01:16,480 --> 01:01:19,440
Speaker 1: Thank you for calling uh not B. Thank you for

987
01:01:19,480 --> 01:01:19,880
Speaker 1: calling B.

988
01:01:21,960 --> 01:01:22,440
Speaker 4: That's the right.

989
01:01:22,800 --> 01:01:24,320
Speaker 5: Have a good night you too.

990
01:01:24,880 --> 01:01:29,000
Speaker 1: Never goes on the line thinking your phone calls every night.

991
01:01:29,360 --> 01:01:31,520
Speaker 1: Never be can goes to his side's

992
01:01:31,600 --> 01:01:35,440
Speaker 4: Teaching you aloud your life, but it's not friendly, an

993
01:01:35,480 --> 01:01:36,840
Speaker 4: expert