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Speaker 1: Misspelling with Tory spelling an iHeartRadio podcast.

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Speaker 2: It's May, you guys, it's a huge month for me.

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Speaker 2: Well it was a huge month. It's still a huge month.

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Speaker 2: So anyway, let me jump right in. I would always

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Speaker 2: tell Dean that he didn't plan on this, but when

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Speaker 2: we got together and decided to get married May seventh,

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Speaker 2: we eloped, planned a whole wedding by ourselves on a

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Speaker 2: private highland in Fiji. Oh it was so good. You know.

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Speaker 2: We didn't think long term. We were just like in

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Speaker 2: the moment. So then all of a sudden we got pregnant.

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Speaker 2: You know. I had a baby a year later ish,

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Speaker 2: so Mother's Day became a thing, and then my birthday.

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Speaker 2: So I would always be like, hey, buddy, sorry, you're screwed.

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Speaker 2: You got three Tory days to deal with, essentially in May,

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Speaker 2: and then there's May Day and synco to my own

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Speaker 2: things like that. But so anyway, this never really was

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Speaker 2: something I thought about, because it's just, you know, wheels

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Speaker 2: in motion, you go along. We were married eighteen years

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Speaker 2: until no joke. Two days ago one of my best friends,

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Speaker 2: Bill Gunkle. Bill said to me, oh, he's an organizer.

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Speaker 2: He likes a good cleanup of his calendar. He said, oh,

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Speaker 2: I just realized I'm able to remove May seventh, your

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Speaker 2: wedding anniversary from my calendar, and that that kind of

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Speaker 2: hit me and I was like, oh, wow, yeah, I mean,

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Speaker 2: obviously I felled for divorce. Obviously we're getting a divorce,

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Speaker 2: but I hadn't thought about that, and I was like, wow,

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Speaker 2: that maya like May seventh is just going to be

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Speaker 2: another day from now on. And that made me kind

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Speaker 2: of think about a lot of things. And I was

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Speaker 2: that girl that took a lot of pride in anniversaries

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Speaker 2: like our wedding anniversary was you know me, I'm if

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Speaker 2: you don't know me, welcome to me. I'm a di wire.

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Speaker 2: I'm a crafter to the core. All my kids came

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Speaker 2: out of you to row crafting because I made them.

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Speaker 2: And yeah, so I would always make something for Dean

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Speaker 2: on our wedding anniversary because you know, I mean, obviously,

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Speaker 2: you know, anyone can buy someone something allegedly, but if

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Speaker 2: you can, that's very nice. But I feel like I

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Speaker 2: always say homemade equals love and it you know, whether

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Speaker 2: that's in the past, the present, or the future. I

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Speaker 2: still maintain that and I'm more of a traditional girl. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: I know, shot right, with a lot of modern values.

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Speaker 2: So I'm kind of like fifty to fifty no pun intended,

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Speaker 2: like I'm half fifty's housewife and half like futuristic like barbaralla,

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Speaker 2: and I would always go to there's a traditional list

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Speaker 2: so you can like google this traditional wedding anniversary presence

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Speaker 2: and then a modern one, which I don't know when

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Speaker 2: that all separated, Like when did someone say, hey, we're

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Speaker 2: going to throw in like a new wedding anniversary. This

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Speaker 2: is the modern one, Like what's wrong with the traditional one?

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Speaker 2: Like well, if a name broke, well I fix it.

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Speaker 2: But anyway, it gave me options, So that was always

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Speaker 2: good because some years I was like, ooh, I can

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Speaker 2: craft something with that, and some years I was like,

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Speaker 2: not so great on the traditional, let me check the modern.

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Speaker 2: But every year I would make him something and super proud,

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Speaker 2: and I'm talking like one year it was leather, so

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Speaker 2: I made him like a leather cuff and had it

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Speaker 2: stamped in like our anniversary ran the back and just

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Speaker 2: like a really cool thing. One year. I know this

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Speaker 2: because I just found it in storage recently, you know

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Speaker 2: my storage woes. That's a good one and so storage

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Speaker 2: wars my storage woes. Rthan add that to the list

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Speaker 2: for something to make in the future. Cool. I found

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Speaker 2: a bench that I made him and no joke. I well,

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Speaker 2: my friend Chris came over and helped me. I have

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Speaker 2: to give a credit where credit is due. But I

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Speaker 2: went to the lumberyard. And I don't know why I

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Speaker 2: had to say it like that, because woman can go

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Speaker 2: to the lumberyard too and be like, I'm at the lumberyard.

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Speaker 2: But I went to the lumberyard and got really cool

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Speaker 2: pieces of wood. Sorry, and made the bench. Took a

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Speaker 2: stencil and wrote on it, I want to grow old

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Speaker 2: with you or something. Look, I'm conveniently like blocking it

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Speaker 2: out because it hurts, but it doesn't hurt. I done inside,

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Speaker 2: but it fine. I have feelings. Anyone jump out?

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Speaker 3: How big was the bench? Like? Could one person sit

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Speaker 3: on it or multiple?

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Speaker 2: Or it was supposed to be a bench for two.

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Speaker 2: And the inspiration behind it was, you know, you see

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Speaker 2: those cute old couple sitting on a bench and oh

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Speaker 2: my god, I'm tearing up. I do have feelings. Look

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Speaker 2: at that chickxus. The intention was that all these beautiful

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Speaker 2: babies we had created together they would go on to

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Speaker 2: have families of their own. And I am always and

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Speaker 2: will remain always excited to grow our family because you

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Speaker 2: know what, at the end of the day, he and

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Speaker 2: I and our kids were a family unit. He's the father.

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Speaker 2: You know, whether we're married and together or not, you know,

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Speaker 2: we're all in this together. And excited to be a

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Speaker 2: grandmother and a great grandmother and yeah, and watching our

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Speaker 2: family grow and grow and grow. I mean, we got

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Speaker 2: five kids, so I better have a lot of fun.

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Speaker 3: A big bench.

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Speaker 2: No, the benching for them. M the bench isn't for them.

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Speaker 2: The bench was for he and I to sit on

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Speaker 2: it together. Like those photos you see of like old

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Speaker 2: couples still holding hands. We used to send pictures to

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Speaker 2: each other with like old couples you would see and

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Speaker 2: like still holding hands, and it's like wow, And we did.

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Speaker 2: We always held hands. That was like a thing, except

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Speaker 2: except in like the last year or two. I guess,

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Speaker 2: I guess. Yeah, that was one of the one of

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Speaker 2: the signs there were fifty million. But yeah, like you

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Speaker 2: would see those couples in their eighties, like still walking

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Speaker 2: down the street holding hands. I mean they just otherwise

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Speaker 2: would fall down. They had to support each other. They

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Speaker 2: couldn't walk straight without each other. But nonetheless, I bought

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Speaker 2: into the love story and I was like, oh my gosh,

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Speaker 2: that's so cute. Like we'd see, you know, pictures of

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Speaker 2: couples like at the beach and just like doing things

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Speaker 2: and just still, you know, in it.

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Speaker 3: So you made the bench? Was that like with hammer

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Speaker 3: and nails or was it glued together.

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Speaker 2: Or I screwed it in? I had nails. It was

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Speaker 2: stable as fuck, like that impressive. We'll till it wasn't

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Speaker 2: it broke?

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Speaker 3: What other things did you make besides the match for

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Speaker 3: your anniversaries?

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Speaker 2: Oh my god, I made there's a specific name for it,

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Speaker 2: when you make a tray that you put your like

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Speaker 2: jewelry or men put their their watch. I made him

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Speaker 2: a Valet tray. And I got a tray and I

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Speaker 2: went round this took a while, and found pennies from

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Speaker 2: the year he was born nineteen sixty six, the year

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Speaker 2: I was born nineteen seventy three, and the year we

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Speaker 2: were married two thousand and six. And I got those

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Speaker 2: pennies and I glued them and mod podge the shit

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Speaker 2: out of that. Oh god, I'm a good mod podger.

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Speaker 2: I had to get back into that. That was my

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Speaker 2: strong suit. And I made this tray that was just

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Speaker 2: very functional, like it was all blacked and shit. He

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Speaker 2: appreciated all the gifts I made him, but yeah, that

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Speaker 2: was a good one. Leather cuff. If you tell me

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Speaker 2: one of the traditional ones, I can tell you what

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Speaker 2: I made.

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Speaker 3: Him, paper metal, gold, silver.

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Speaker 2: No, I'm blanket, I've got nothing.

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Speaker 3: Oh m.

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Speaker 2: The brass cockering was really good that year. That's really

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Speaker 2: I hammered it. Oh my god, I'm so talented. Welded

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Speaker 2: it well. Wow, going back to the bench, it says

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Speaker 2: grow old with me dot dot dot. Yeah. On the

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Speaker 2: legs were our wedding date, and then on the other

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Speaker 2: leg was are the current date. And we put it

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Speaker 2: in each house. We moved a lot, a lot because

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Speaker 2: I was always chasing the dream. Like you know, it

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Speaker 2: wasn't us, it wasn't the relationship. It was the house.

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Speaker 2: Oh that reminds me of a horror film. It's not

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Speaker 2: the house, it's your son. Ooh, insidious one. Fuck yeah,

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Speaker 2: I nailed it, still got it, thank you. So that

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Speaker 2: resonated like every horror film. It wasn't the house, it

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Speaker 2: was never the house. So I kept moving and kept moving,

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Speaker 2: and let's start where it all began. When we got married.

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Speaker 2: We were filming my series So Notorious, and Diana and

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Speaker 2: I got together while we were filming that, and anyway,

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Speaker 2: the set designer helped me create this amazing like iron

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Speaker 2: stand with a cute plaque that said McDermott Baby Farm

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Speaker 2: established two thousand and six. The day we got married,

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Speaker 2: I was a farm. I was like, pull pushing them out.

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Speaker 2: Mine's the push, ripping that zipper open, taking them out.

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Speaker 2: So we put that and moved that so many times

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Speaker 2: until I mean it was weathered and cracked and just

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Speaker 2: the demise of that. Yeah. But the bench, the bench

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Speaker 2: survived till it fell to pieces. It got rained on.

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Speaker 2: I didn't think of that that the rain would wear

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Speaker 2: on it. It rusted, it broke, you guys. That's I

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Speaker 2: guess what the heart of it is is that it broke.

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Speaker 2: And when it broke, I put too much emotional symbolism

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Speaker 2: and placement on. As Dean has told me in adamant objects.

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Speaker 2: At some point it just was getting wobbly, it was

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Speaker 2: getting shaky, and I was like the bench and we'd

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Speaker 2: moved in. He's like, oh, the bench is a little wobbly.

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Speaker 2: I was like, oh, we got to fix it. We

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Speaker 2: got to fix it, and we never fixed it, so

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Speaker 2: eventually it broke. Oh I kept it though, I kept

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Speaker 2: the wood pieces, of course I did, saying I'm going

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Speaker 2: to put it back together, and then sat in the

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Speaker 2: garage in pieces for a few years, like my marriage basically,

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Speaker 2: and then I found in storage.

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Speaker 3: So and what did you do with it?

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Speaker 2: Uh? Duh? I took a picture of it to show

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Speaker 2: to you, guys. I don't know.

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Speaker 1: No, I mean, did you do you still have it?

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Speaker 1: Did you throw the pieces away? Is it sitting in

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Speaker 1: that last storage lockery still at.

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Speaker 2: I have no storagelockers, so I'm done that you've.

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Speaker 3: Had one left?

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Speaker 2: Nope?

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Speaker 3: Congratulations, thank you?

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Speaker 2: Oh my god, my heart just sink. I'm panic now.

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Speaker 2: I don't know where it is. I feel like you, guys,

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Speaker 2: I need to burn it. No, no, don't burn it.

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Speaker 2: Can you not do that?

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Speaker 3: I don't know. I think the metaphor is better now

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Speaker 3: without burning it.

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Speaker 2: Oh, it's metatorical.

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Speaker 1: Here's what I think you should do if you can

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Speaker 1: find it, is take a little piece of that wood

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Speaker 1: and put it in like a box picture frame, and

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Speaker 1: just as a keepsake, you know, a piece a piece

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Speaker 1: of the bench.

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Speaker 3: I don't think you need to burn it. You know,

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Speaker 3: you guys are on good terms.

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Speaker 2: No, no, no, I didn't mean, uh, I don't know

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Speaker 2: why I'm gonna cry. I didn't mean burn it like

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Speaker 2: bad for him. I mean burning it as a symbolism

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Speaker 2: of letting go right past and moving on at the

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Speaker 2: future is not what you do.

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Speaker 3: I think you can totally do that.

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Speaker 1: What matters is if the symbolism means something to you, right,

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Speaker 1: It's like, if that to you means moving on, letting

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Speaker 1: it go, then it will would probably be a good

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Speaker 1: thing for.

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Speaker 2: You to do. Well, I'm not going to grow old

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Speaker 2: with him.

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Speaker 1: So well you you know what you kind of are

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Speaker 1: just not as a married couple. You know, you're still

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Speaker 1: you're still tied by five amazing children. So it's just

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Speaker 1: a different kind of growing up.

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Speaker 2: I don't like regular ties. Can we double not it?

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Speaker 3: You will find somebody, Oh my god, you.

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Speaker 2: Guys every week this is not going to be about me, like,

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Speaker 2: oh no, poor me, I'm alone and single. Oh, or

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Speaker 2: it can be. I mean, I don't know. Can we

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Speaker 2: go back to it for a second, Yeah, can we

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Speaker 2: look up what would have been? Just tell me what

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Speaker 2: it would have been. I'll tell you what I'd make.

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Speaker 3: Hit year would this have been?

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Speaker 2: This would be eighteen? Correct, eighteen. I always say we

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Speaker 2: were married eighteen years, but technically I'm not divorced yet,

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Speaker 2: so it's not final. So true, I wasn't lying. Parcelain porcelain.

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Speaker 2: Oh good teeth. Here you go, buddy, I'm gonna make

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Speaker 2: a necklace out of them. How woud his girlfriend feel

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Speaker 2: about that? If you ever loved me, you won't wear

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Speaker 2: my porcelain teeth around your neck? Five of them for

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Speaker 2: the five beautiful kids we made. How can you say

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Speaker 2: no to that? Sorry, Lily, you know I love you. Okay,

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Speaker 2: we had a vow renewal at four years in. I mean,

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Speaker 2: granted it was we did it on our reality show

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Speaker 2: Torri and Dean Home Sweet Hollywood. But that's crazy now.

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Speaker 2: I call it the bowel removal. By the way, unpacking.

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Speaker 2: Speaking of unpacking from storage, my daughter Stella brings in

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Speaker 2: a box. This just happened yesterday and she goes, of course,

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Speaker 2: she's sassy, God, she's so clever, and she goes, I

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Speaker 2: unpacked this box, and I was like, oh, this is

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Speaker 2: not coming into the house. So she led with that,

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Speaker 2: which crushed my soul. I was like, that's an antique.

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Speaker 2: What do you mean. I got that at a flea market.

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Speaker 2: That's very chic. And anyway, I digress, and she goes

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Speaker 2: and then I opened it. You guys, the thing she

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Speaker 2: found in this box, I can't make this shit up.

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Speaker 2: First of all, oh my god, it was like a

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Speaker 2: paperback flip through book of nine oh two one oh,

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Speaker 2: like a small one from the nineties.

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Speaker 1: Uh.

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Speaker 2: It was an intact fully wrapped bubblegum pack of our

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Speaker 2: cards and bubblegum, which she asked if they could like

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Speaker 2: do some like challenge and eat it, and I was

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Speaker 2: like nope. And I was like, I have to get

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Speaker 2: new teeth. I don't want you guys to as well.

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Speaker 2: That's that's gonna be hard. Two of them. Wonder how

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Speaker 2: much I could sell those for.

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Speaker 3: That's definitely a collector's I.

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Speaker 2: Know, like a polaroid photo from a photo shoot. Nino

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Speaker 2: two and o still intact a bag of teeth.

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Speaker 1: No, we have made a bag of teeth, real teeth,

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Speaker 1: a bag of teeth.

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Speaker 2: So it's like, oh sentimental Nino two and o oh,

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Speaker 2: look at that picture. Oh my god, you look so

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Speaker 2: great anyhow, and then the bag of teeth and she

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Speaker 2: was like, mom, what are these? And I was like, oh,

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Speaker 2: those are my wisdom teeth and she goes, that's disgusting.

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Speaker 2: Can I throw these away? I was like absolutely not.

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Speaker 2: And she goes, what are you gonna do with them?

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Speaker 2: When'd you get your wisdom teeth out? And I was like,

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Speaker 2: uh sixteen. She goes, that's disgusting. Yeah, root and all

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Speaker 2: all four perfectly intact. Might I add, oh, correction, those

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Speaker 2: I will send to Dean because mine are all shaved

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Speaker 2: to nubs because I'm getting finnars owed to my creepy past. Okay,

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Speaker 2: I'm gonna go on. This is my twenties from my

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Speaker 2: first TV movie I did in Canada. This is when

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Speaker 2: like they had smoke shops, but like La, it wasn't

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Speaker 2: a thing. And I got like the coolest Oh my god,

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Speaker 2: it's a cube and it's metal and it's like a

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Speaker 2: one hit. Back then we'd say pot. Now it's like

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00:18:48,760 --> 00:18:51,480
Speaker 2: weed and it was a cube and I was like, Aha,

288
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Speaker 2: I'm gonna come back to LA and invent this because

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Speaker 2: no one has it in the States. Another thing I

290
00:18:58,880 --> 00:19:03,440
Speaker 2: put on my checklist of inventions. But she was like mom,

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Speaker 2: and I was like, whoa, it was the nineties, Like yeah,

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Speaker 2: mom had like a little bit of a stoner phase,

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Speaker 2: Like sorry, there was that, and what else. There was

294
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Speaker 2: a couple more creepy things that I was just like, yeah, oh,

295
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Speaker 2: I know what. It was a G string. It was clean.

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Speaker 2: I did a smell test. It was clean. You guys.

297
00:19:28,200 --> 00:19:30,000
Speaker 2: I went, it's a little musty. It's been there for years.

298
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Speaker 2: But I was like, oh my god, this is back

299
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Speaker 2: when it was super cool, Like this is so old

300
00:19:36,920 --> 00:19:41,760
Speaker 2: school but vs. Victoria's Secret PS. When I was young,

301
00:19:41,880 --> 00:19:46,240
Speaker 2: Victoria's Secret was super popular and then for decades it

302
00:19:46,359 --> 00:19:49,399
Speaker 2: was like like you couldn't wear it. It was like

303
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Speaker 2: not cool, and now it's totally cool with the kids again.

304
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Speaker 2: So my initials on brand, but it had a BS

305
00:19:58,560 --> 00:20:00,159
Speaker 2: on it, and I was like, oh, that's okay you

306
00:20:00,359 --> 00:20:02,240
Speaker 2: and I saved it, and so I was in there.

307
00:20:02,400 --> 00:20:06,160
Speaker 2: But anyway, collectively like nine two one zero, like old

308
00:20:06,160 --> 00:20:12,199
Speaker 2: school bubblegum teeth that had been ripped out, basically a

309
00:20:12,240 --> 00:20:16,959
Speaker 2: weed pen from the nineties and an old pair of

310
00:20:17,520 --> 00:20:23,199
Speaker 2: underwear creeped out. My kid, not gonna lie, not surprised,

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00:20:24,160 --> 00:20:27,439
Speaker 2: and she wanted to dispose of all this and I

312
00:20:27,480 --> 00:20:29,560
Speaker 2: was like, nope, nope, we want to take a picture

313
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Speaker 2: of this content. I don't know what I'll do with

314
00:20:33,720 --> 00:20:46,440
Speaker 2: it all, but anyway, anyway, yes, and then there's Mother's Day.

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Speaker 2: This is my first single girl Mother's Day? What does

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00:20:52,200 --> 00:20:54,919
Speaker 2: that mean? Like, I don't even know what that means?

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Speaker 2: And Stella, bless her heart, she was like, Mom, what

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Speaker 2: do you want to do for Mother's And I was like,

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Speaker 2: whatever you guys want. She's like, no, Mom, seriously, every

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00:21:04,840 --> 00:21:07,560
Speaker 2: year you always say whatever we want, Like what do

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00:21:07,800 --> 00:21:14,439
Speaker 2: you want? Take everybody out of the picture? What do

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00:21:14,480 --> 00:21:18,400
Speaker 2: you like to do for fun? And I had no answer,

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00:21:18,480 --> 00:21:23,720
Speaker 2: you guys? And that was that was startling because I

324
00:21:23,760 --> 00:21:27,199
Speaker 2: couldn't remember what I used to like to do for me.

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00:21:29,000 --> 00:21:32,119
Speaker 2: I couldn't even think of it. I was like and

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Speaker 2: I kept saying, we wi we like sushi, and she's like, Mom,

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Speaker 2: you she was like, do you want to go get

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Speaker 2: a massage? And I was like no, no, no, no, it's

329
00:21:45,040 --> 00:21:48,280
Speaker 2: about you guys. She's like, no, Mom, it's not like

330
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Speaker 2: you do this every year like you plan and it's

331
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Speaker 2: about everybody else, Like what do you want? And I

332
00:21:57,760 --> 00:22:01,360
Speaker 2: couldn't remember what I like to do because it's been

333
00:22:01,480 --> 00:22:05,040
Speaker 2: so long that I've thought about doing something for me.

334
00:22:06,000 --> 00:22:10,159
Speaker 2: Ruth Anne, you knew me before I was married and

335
00:22:10,240 --> 00:22:12,240
Speaker 2: had kids. Do you remember what I used to like

336
00:22:12,320 --> 00:22:12,600
Speaker 2: to do?

337
00:22:13,280 --> 00:22:15,440
Speaker 1: You really did get a lot of joy out of

338
00:22:15,480 --> 00:22:20,720
Speaker 1: all of your DIY things that you made and cooking.

339
00:22:21,040 --> 00:22:24,560
Speaker 1: I can remember you having. Did you say cooking fun

340
00:22:24,840 --> 00:22:25,959
Speaker 1: baking and cooking?

341
00:22:26,040 --> 00:22:26,960
Speaker 2: Did you say hooking?

342
00:22:27,480 --> 00:22:28,720
Speaker 3: No, I say cooking.

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Speaker 2: Oh my god, you guys, I think I've gone deaf.

344
00:22:33,240 --> 00:22:36,520
Speaker 2: I've had kids screaming in my ear for a long time.

345
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Speaker 3: Yeah, I remember you having a really good time hooking

346
00:22:40,080 --> 00:22:44,480
Speaker 3: some boulevard about three o'clock in the morning. Those were

347
00:22:44,520 --> 00:22:45,119
Speaker 3: good times.

348
00:22:46,160 --> 00:22:50,080
Speaker 2: What do you mean, no, no cooking? I used to

349
00:22:50,080 --> 00:22:50,960
Speaker 2: hook rugs.

350
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Speaker 1: Oh sorry, I'm not as crafty as you are. No.

351
00:22:56,880 --> 00:22:59,080
Speaker 2: Jen taught me that, Like I can do a lot

352
00:22:59,080 --> 00:23:02,520
Speaker 2: of DIY. Jenny taught me. We would sit in her

353
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Speaker 2: house and she taught me how to hook a rug.

354
00:23:04,720 --> 00:23:06,679
Speaker 2: We went to she took me to Michael's for the

355
00:23:06,720 --> 00:23:12,359
Speaker 2: first time. But yeah, I remember I was so big

356
00:23:12,400 --> 00:23:16,720
Speaker 2: and dicopoge mm hm. Would you loved it?

357
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Speaker 3: And it was nice because it was stuff you did

358
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Speaker 3: with your kids.

359
00:23:20,359 --> 00:23:22,600
Speaker 2: So stop bringing them into this.

360
00:23:22,880 --> 00:23:26,880
Speaker 3: Why they's supposed to be sort of for both of you.

361
00:23:26,960 --> 00:23:28,720
Speaker 3: It's the kids celebrating their mom.

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00:23:29,280 --> 00:23:35,000
Speaker 2: No, okay, interesting, there's two schools of thought. There's some

363
00:23:35,240 --> 00:23:38,920
Speaker 2: moms that literally are like, you know what, I'm in

364
00:23:38,960 --> 00:23:43,600
Speaker 2: this twenty four to seven every day. It's always about you, guys.

365
00:23:44,160 --> 00:23:47,520
Speaker 2: So this is my one day and I want the

366
00:23:47,600 --> 00:23:51,399
Speaker 2: day off. Lorraine, what type of mom? They're both like,

367
00:23:51,720 --> 00:23:54,680
Speaker 2: it's fair, both types of moms like do you want

368
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Speaker 2: to do what the kids want to do and spend

369
00:23:56,480 --> 00:23:59,320
Speaker 2: the day with them, or do you want, like, I'd

370
00:23:59,359 --> 00:24:02,280
Speaker 2: love to have some peace and quiet and do something

371
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Speaker 2: for me.

372
00:24:03,400 --> 00:24:05,920
Speaker 4: I want to be this spaw mom, but I I'll

373
00:24:05,960 --> 00:24:08,639
Speaker 4: never be this spaw mom because of my guilt that

374
00:24:08,720 --> 00:24:11,280
Speaker 4: I have no idea why I have. But yes, every

375
00:24:11,359 --> 00:24:13,400
Speaker 4: day for them, even when it's Mother's Day.

376
00:24:13,640 --> 00:24:20,879
Speaker 2: Unfortunately fair and my sentiment is exactly I want to

377
00:24:20,960 --> 00:24:24,080
Speaker 2: be that spa mom, which you guys, you know what.

378
00:24:25,280 --> 00:24:28,439
Speaker 2: The spot doesn't work for me. I just everyone's like,

379
00:24:28,440 --> 00:24:33,680
Speaker 2: go get a massage. Speaking of guilt, I can't get

380
00:24:33,720 --> 00:24:40,200
Speaker 2: a massage because I'm so worried the entire time like, oh,

381
00:24:40,680 --> 00:24:43,879
Speaker 2: they're working on me, they're doing something for me. What

382
00:24:44,040 --> 00:24:47,639
Speaker 2: about them? So I engage and ask about their lives

383
00:24:47,760 --> 00:24:50,159
Speaker 2: and then you guys know, like, it's not even about me.

384
00:24:50,280 --> 00:24:56,440
Speaker 2: I'm just this human like energy wise. People end up

385
00:24:56,520 --> 00:25:03,840
Speaker 2: just like about that sounded dirty about their lives, and

386
00:25:04,280 --> 00:25:07,600
Speaker 2: I embrace it and I end up giving them advice

387
00:25:07,760 --> 00:25:10,280
Speaker 2: and being like, oh my gosh. And then what happened?

388
00:25:10,720 --> 00:25:16,280
Speaker 2: And I've had one missus say oh my god, I've

389
00:25:16,280 --> 00:25:18,719
Speaker 2: been doing this for so long, and she as she's crying,

390
00:25:19,040 --> 00:25:22,080
Speaker 2: and she goes, that's a part. She brought up something

391
00:25:22,200 --> 00:25:25,920
Speaker 2: very emotional that she had repressed, and she said, I'm

392
00:25:25,920 --> 00:25:27,439
Speaker 2: so sorry. I have to take a moment. I am

393
00:25:28,040 --> 00:25:33,320
Speaker 2: embarrassed telling you this. And I promptly sat up and

394
00:25:33,680 --> 00:25:35,720
Speaker 2: hugged her and said don't oh my god, don't worry.

395
00:25:35,760 --> 00:25:38,760
Speaker 2: It's safe with me, and like, but I'm that human

396
00:25:39,520 --> 00:25:42,440
Speaker 2: that I'm just like, oh my gosh, it's so quiet.

397
00:25:42,920 --> 00:25:46,200
Speaker 2: And then I've had friends be like no, no, no,

398
00:25:46,520 --> 00:25:48,840
Speaker 2: you can't do that. So when you start a massage,

399
00:25:49,640 --> 00:25:52,920
Speaker 2: you don't you say thank you. You're gracious, and you're like, Okay,

400
00:25:53,040 --> 00:25:55,119
Speaker 2: I've had a hard week. I'm just going to be quiet,

401
00:25:55,160 --> 00:25:57,360
Speaker 2: and I'm like, okay, well I can't say that and

402
00:25:57,600 --> 00:26:02,119
Speaker 2: don't engage. You know, you're paying them, you're here, like

403
00:26:02,280 --> 00:26:07,840
Speaker 2: they're here and they want to do this, and don't engage.

404
00:26:07,960 --> 00:26:11,320
Speaker 2: So then when I don't engage and don't talk to them,

405
00:26:11,560 --> 00:26:14,040
Speaker 2: I sit in my head for like an hour being like,

406
00:26:14,760 --> 00:26:17,800
Speaker 2: oh my god, is she okay? Or and I don't

407
00:26:18,160 --> 00:26:24,760
Speaker 2: like men touching me during a paid massage, so I yeah,

408
00:26:24,840 --> 00:26:27,439
Speaker 2: I'm just like, oh god, I feel so bad. And

409
00:26:27,480 --> 00:26:29,960
Speaker 2: then I start to like go weird places like oh

410
00:26:30,040 --> 00:26:32,719
Speaker 2: my god, I feel so bad, like at least it's me,

411
00:26:33,080 --> 00:26:37,359
Speaker 2: Like imagine like men she has to deal with and

412
00:26:37,400 --> 00:26:41,000
Speaker 2: they're hairy and gross and like that type of human.

413
00:26:41,200 --> 00:26:45,240
Speaker 2: Like yeah, I go all kinds of crazy places. But

414
00:26:45,400 --> 00:26:48,919
Speaker 2: I sit there for an hour, just like tense, and

415
00:26:48,920 --> 00:26:54,119
Speaker 2: then afterwards like are you relaxed, And I'm like absolutely,

416
00:26:55,520 --> 00:26:58,320
Speaker 2: but I'm not anyway, Spa da mom.

417
00:26:59,400 --> 00:27:02,359
Speaker 3: Anybody gives you a guest certificate for a massage, feel

418
00:27:02,359 --> 00:27:05,880
Speaker 3: free to pass it my way. I can relax during

419
00:27:05,880 --> 00:27:09,480
Speaker 3: a massage, really yeah. I not feel the urge to

420
00:27:09,560 --> 00:27:12,040
Speaker 3: talk or think about the massage therapist.

421
00:27:13,000 --> 00:27:17,640
Speaker 2: Okay, wait, have you my friend? And I just had

422
00:27:17,880 --> 00:27:21,280
Speaker 2: this combo the other day about happy endings. Oh god,

423
00:27:21,880 --> 00:27:26,439
Speaker 2: oh too much for this podcast. Sorry my bad. No

424
00:27:26,480 --> 00:27:33,920
Speaker 2: one ever. We were talking about happy endings and it

425
00:27:33,960 --> 00:27:38,320
Speaker 2: was like, wow, this is a male and I were

426
00:27:38,359 --> 00:27:42,440
Speaker 2: talking about this, so I was curious, how do men

427
00:27:42,560 --> 00:27:46,520
Speaker 2: feel about it? And he was saying like not as

428
00:27:46,640 --> 00:27:50,880
Speaker 2: jam like could never even would not be okay with it.

429
00:27:51,080 --> 00:27:54,520
Speaker 2: But you know, clearly, you know, there's a lot of

430
00:27:54,560 --> 00:27:58,680
Speaker 2: my male friends are like, oh, yeah, that's a thing.

431
00:27:59,280 --> 00:28:03,199
Speaker 2: And I'm like, oh, that's so weird. And then he

432
00:28:03,359 --> 00:28:07,000
Speaker 2: posts the question to me, does this ever happen these

433
00:28:07,040 --> 00:28:11,640
Speaker 2: happy ending places with a woman? Like do they ever

434
00:28:11,720 --> 00:28:15,160
Speaker 2: give happy endings to a female or is it just males?

435
00:28:15,720 --> 00:28:17,800
Speaker 2: And I was like, I don't know, I don't know.

436
00:28:18,240 --> 00:28:19,919
Speaker 3: Definitely not at Burke Williams.

437
00:28:20,280 --> 00:28:24,360
Speaker 2: Burke Williams. Oh you go to fancy places now.

438
00:28:24,560 --> 00:28:26,879
Speaker 3: Burke Williams was like, in the nineties.

439
00:28:26,600 --> 00:28:32,960
Speaker 2: You pretended to work out at Crunch? Cool, right, yep? No.

440
00:28:33,359 --> 00:28:37,000
Speaker 2: I remember that I had a boyfriend then and he

441
00:28:37,280 --> 00:28:40,800
Speaker 2: loved Burke Williams. So we would like go to Crunch

442
00:28:40,840 --> 00:28:43,560
Speaker 2: and he'd work out and I'd like pretend to.

443
00:28:43,560 --> 00:28:49,160
Speaker 5: Do the zoom book class or whatever boot camp, and

444
00:28:49,320 --> 00:28:52,680
Speaker 5: it would be so embarrassing because they have like glass

445
00:28:53,040 --> 00:28:57,120
Speaker 5: like glass so like everybody.

446
00:28:56,320 --> 00:29:01,000
Speaker 2: Can see correct. And at Crunch in La it's on

447
00:29:01,080 --> 00:29:05,959
Speaker 2: Sunset Boulevard and they would always I'm not even kidding,

448
00:29:06,840 --> 00:29:10,440
Speaker 2: it would be like thirty people in there, and they'd

449
00:29:10,480 --> 00:29:12,840
Speaker 2: have on their headset and they'd be calling to you

450
00:29:12,920 --> 00:29:16,240
Speaker 2: to encourage you. They'd always call me out and I'd

451
00:29:16,240 --> 00:29:20,240
Speaker 2: be like, what is happening. They'd be like Toy, and

452
00:29:20,280 --> 00:29:22,800
Speaker 2: I'd be like, first of all, you know, I hate

453
00:29:22,840 --> 00:29:26,800
Speaker 2: my name said like toy, but then like I don't know.

454
00:29:27,360 --> 00:29:30,280
Speaker 2: It was yeah, it was late nineties.

455
00:29:31,040 --> 00:29:34,120
Speaker 3: Out to say you've got the steps.

456
00:29:33,720 --> 00:29:37,240
Speaker 2: For on or duh, yeah, you know I don't work out.

457
00:29:37,240 --> 00:29:40,000
Speaker 2: I don't do that shit. And I was probably gossip

458
00:29:40,080 --> 00:29:41,720
Speaker 2: being and like talking to my friend. I've been that

459
00:29:41,720 --> 00:29:49,480
Speaker 2: way since like high school anyway, chatty Kathy. But yeah,

460
00:29:49,520 --> 00:29:52,600
Speaker 2: I'd be like it'd be like Toy. I'm like, uh

461
00:29:52,640 --> 00:29:59,760
Speaker 2: huh it was like and they'd be like okay, oh Toy, No,

462
00:30:00,080 --> 00:30:03,120
Speaker 2: I'll be over in a second. I'd be like so shamed.

463
00:30:03,320 --> 00:30:06,880
Speaker 2: I literally one time it was this boot camp class

464
00:30:07,360 --> 00:30:10,560
Speaker 2: and the instructor had called me out three times and

465
00:30:10,760 --> 00:30:14,600
Speaker 2: I literally waited till she was like helping somebody else

466
00:30:15,080 --> 00:30:19,080
Speaker 2: in the corner, and I slipped out and slip out

467
00:30:19,200 --> 00:30:24,600
Speaker 2: a fucking ran I was like. And then from the

468
00:30:24,640 --> 00:30:29,719
Speaker 2: back she was like, you finally got it right. I

469
00:30:29,760 --> 00:30:33,560
Speaker 2: was like, bye, But I liked the little holes in

470
00:30:33,600 --> 00:30:36,440
Speaker 2: the wall, like the little places that are like in

471
00:30:36,480 --> 00:30:37,240
Speaker 2: a strip.

472
00:30:37,000 --> 00:30:39,880
Speaker 3: Mall where you will get a happy ending.

473
00:30:41,000 --> 00:30:43,280
Speaker 2: No, I don't want a happy ending, like if I

474
00:30:43,320 --> 00:30:46,960
Speaker 2: feel guilt with them, just like massaging my arm and leg.

475
00:30:47,520 --> 00:30:50,160
Speaker 2: Imagine the guilt I would feel if they were like

476
00:30:50,240 --> 00:30:53,720
Speaker 2: trying to like stroke my lady parts. Do you stroke

477
00:30:53,840 --> 00:31:00,800
Speaker 2: lady parts? If they were too oh my god, jggle

478
00:31:00,880 --> 00:31:04,520
Speaker 2: it just a little bit, not a little bit, a

479
00:31:04,560 --> 00:31:08,680
Speaker 2: lot and you gotta go fast. But whole other story, Yeah,

480
00:31:08,760 --> 00:31:13,000
Speaker 2: I would never be comfortable. But on rare occasion they

481
00:31:13,040 --> 00:31:17,320
Speaker 2: would go near your like butt and like almost too

482
00:31:17,480 --> 00:31:20,800
Speaker 2: close to the thighs. Have you ever had that happen?

483
00:31:20,880 --> 00:31:25,120
Speaker 2: And I'm like Rosen, I was like oooh, But then

484
00:31:25,160 --> 00:31:26,880
Speaker 2: You're like, I don't want to make them feel bad.

485
00:31:26,960 --> 00:31:30,920
Speaker 2: Perhaps this they're getting knots out of muscles, and so

486
00:31:30,960 --> 00:31:34,320
Speaker 2: I don't want to freeze up. So I'd be like Relax, relax,

487
00:31:34,400 --> 00:31:38,360
Speaker 2: They're doing nothing wrong. This is part of the job. Okay,

488
00:31:39,120 --> 00:31:42,280
Speaker 2: but I was like, whoa kind of close? That's kind

489
00:31:42,280 --> 00:31:47,440
Speaker 2: of close anyway. I am curious if a female has

490
00:31:47,480 --> 00:31:49,240
Speaker 2: ever gotten happy ending.

491
00:31:50,360 --> 00:31:54,120
Speaker 3: All right, this Mother's Day and then your birthday?

492
00:31:54,360 --> 00:32:01,040
Speaker 2: Oh god, okay, so there's Mother's Day. Ella, of course,

493
00:32:01,880 --> 00:32:05,760
Speaker 2: leader of the pack. She was like, mom, what do

494
00:32:05,800 --> 00:32:08,440
Speaker 2: you want to do? I had nothing. I couldn't remember

495
00:32:08,480 --> 00:32:12,080
Speaker 2: what I like, which leads me back to what do

496
00:32:12,320 --> 00:32:15,800
Speaker 2: I like to do? I must have had hobbies before kids,

497
00:32:15,840 --> 00:32:18,320
Speaker 2: Like in my twenties, what did I like to do

498
00:32:19,080 --> 00:32:21,920
Speaker 2: besides shop and drink? What did I like to do?

499
00:32:22,640 --> 00:32:25,120
Speaker 2: And rescue dogs? What did I like to do?

500
00:32:25,800 --> 00:32:27,240
Speaker 3: I was going to say rescue dogs?

501
00:32:27,280 --> 00:32:30,120
Speaker 1: I remember you making jewelry. I can think it always

502
00:32:30,160 --> 00:32:33,760
Speaker 1: goes back to you being like super crafty and having

503
00:32:33,760 --> 00:32:38,160
Speaker 1: an amazing artistic imagination and plugging into that that made

504
00:32:38,160 --> 00:32:38,920
Speaker 1: you really happy.

505
00:32:39,640 --> 00:32:44,360
Speaker 2: Someone's like, you should get into pickleball. I love to

506
00:32:44,360 --> 00:32:47,920
Speaker 2: eat pickles. Pickles are a huge We do pickle tastings

507
00:32:47,960 --> 00:32:50,000
Speaker 2: in my house, like every two weeks, I'm not kidding,

508
00:32:50,040 --> 00:32:52,440
Speaker 2: a new kind of pickle comes out. We're on it,

509
00:32:52,840 --> 00:32:55,320
Speaker 2: and all my kids fall a suit. So if anyone

510
00:32:55,520 --> 00:32:58,640
Speaker 2: wants to send me anything, I would like pickles.

511
00:32:58,920 --> 00:33:00,560
Speaker 3: That's a great idea.

512
00:33:02,280 --> 00:33:08,440
Speaker 2: I should aim higher and caviar. Okay, anyway, what am

513
00:33:08,440 --> 00:33:10,720
Speaker 2: I gonna do? Here's what I told her. I said,

514
00:33:11,000 --> 00:33:13,040
Speaker 2: we used to love but it's still a wee thing.

515
00:33:13,120 --> 00:33:14,680
Speaker 2: But it's something I wanted to do. We haven't been

516
00:33:14,680 --> 00:33:17,960
Speaker 2: in a while because our lives have been chaos. I

517
00:33:18,000 --> 00:33:22,160
Speaker 2: wanted to go down to Little Tokyo and walk around,

518
00:33:22,840 --> 00:33:25,520
Speaker 2: and that's where I have often gotten a lot of

519
00:33:25,560 --> 00:33:31,800
Speaker 2: my inspiration. And I love the fashion district. And you

520
00:33:31,840 --> 00:33:35,000
Speaker 2: know what, I love revolving sushi down there. It's called Cora.

521
00:33:35,760 --> 00:33:39,600
Speaker 2: It's just so fun. Anyway, so do that.

522
00:33:39,600 --> 00:33:41,800
Speaker 3: That sounds like a great thing to do for Mother's Day.

523
00:33:42,240 --> 00:33:45,320
Speaker 2: So I love Oh you guys, I love dim sum.

524
00:33:45,880 --> 00:33:48,760
Speaker 1: Oh well well there you just come up with some

525
00:33:48,800 --> 00:33:52,360
Speaker 1: great ideas. Great great mother's day.

526
00:33:53,280 --> 00:33:58,760
Speaker 2: This podcast multi purpose. Okay, my birthday quickly, let's talk

527
00:33:58,800 --> 00:34:01,960
Speaker 2: about my birthday. You guys, you know I love green,

528
00:34:02,160 --> 00:34:06,520
Speaker 2: and green is the color. I'm a Taurus. I'm Tori.

529
00:34:06,600 --> 00:34:14,520
Speaker 2: I'm a Taurus. I love sushi. Oh we just see exactly.

530
00:34:14,680 --> 00:34:16,879
Speaker 2: I don't know what I love I'll find out I'm

531
00:34:16,960 --> 00:34:22,840
Speaker 2: learning about myself. Who knew me? Anyway? Yeah, so emerald

532
00:34:22,920 --> 00:34:26,560
Speaker 2: is my birthstone, which is not the reason I like green.

533
00:34:26,960 --> 00:34:30,880
Speaker 2: I just love green like Green's always been my jam.

534
00:34:31,640 --> 00:34:37,200
Speaker 2: Obviously I wear a lot of green. So anyway, So

535
00:34:37,280 --> 00:34:39,120
Speaker 2: what do you want to do for your birthday this year?

536
00:34:39,760 --> 00:34:44,640
Speaker 2: Having it be your first birthday as a single woman? Okay,

537
00:34:44,880 --> 00:34:48,799
Speaker 2: so the last two years, this is a fact, I

538
00:34:48,960 --> 00:34:52,640
Speaker 2: have been sick on my birthday. I had bronchitis on

539
00:34:52,680 --> 00:34:56,520
Speaker 2: my forty ninth birthday. Literally stayed in bed. They brought

540
00:34:56,520 --> 00:34:59,200
Speaker 2: the cake into me. I was like, one eye open,

541
00:35:00,040 --> 00:35:06,000
Speaker 2: which one works better with my botox? None? Okay? They

542
00:35:07,080 --> 00:35:12,280
Speaker 2: brought the cake in. I was like so sick. Okay,

543
00:35:12,400 --> 00:35:16,439
Speaker 2: got it? Missed my birthday. My fiftieth birthday, ruth An

544
00:35:16,560 --> 00:35:21,520
Speaker 2: was there. My mother threw a lovely she knows caviars

545
00:35:21,640 --> 00:35:25,600
Speaker 2: like Big Sam. Sorry when you grew up like I did,

546
00:35:25,600 --> 00:35:30,759
Speaker 2: like I was born eating caviar silver spoon. Oh, but

547
00:35:30,840 --> 00:35:34,520
Speaker 2: we got member, we got pearlized spoons. I still have

548
00:35:34,640 --> 00:35:39,560
Speaker 2: it me too, one of my purses. Remember to take

549
00:35:39,560 --> 00:35:42,839
Speaker 2: that out before I sell it, the purse, not the spoon. Mom.

550
00:35:42,880 --> 00:35:46,800
Speaker 2: I would never do that. I love that. But yeah,

551
00:35:47,040 --> 00:35:49,680
Speaker 2: so they had one in Paris. They opened up a

552
00:35:49,719 --> 00:35:54,840
Speaker 2: caviar restaurant bar here and lovely twenty person beautiful table

553
00:35:55,920 --> 00:36:02,760
Speaker 2: all my besties and you guys. Ironically was this massive,

554
00:36:03,480 --> 00:36:07,520
Speaker 2: big potato you guys, I'll send you a picture, you guys,

555
00:36:09,600 --> 00:36:15,680
Speaker 2: topped with the most heaping spoonful of caviar you've ever seen.

556
00:36:16,400 --> 00:36:20,680
Speaker 2: My other one of my other friends jokes, he was like,

557
00:36:20,840 --> 00:36:24,759
Speaker 2: oh my god, I don't even eat caviar or potatoes,

558
00:36:25,520 --> 00:36:28,439
Speaker 2: but when I'm being served a thousand dollars potato, I'm

559
00:36:28,480 --> 00:36:31,919
Speaker 2: going deep. WHOA. I don't know where I was going

560
00:36:31,960 --> 00:36:34,040
Speaker 2: with that one. Do you remember that?

561
00:36:34,160 --> 00:36:34,320
Speaker 5: I do?

562
00:36:35,680 --> 00:36:39,279
Speaker 2: And Hansen's my mom, Aw, this was so cute. So

563
00:36:39,440 --> 00:36:43,360
Speaker 2: Hansen's has been like my family since I was born.

564
00:36:43,480 --> 00:36:48,600
Speaker 2: My mom always every birthday Hanson's cake. She got individualized

565
00:36:48,680 --> 00:36:52,400
Speaker 2: Hanson's cakes for everybody to take home as the party

566
00:36:52,440 --> 00:36:54,959
Speaker 2: gets Hey, ruth Anne, what happened to your Hanson's cake?

567
00:36:55,520 --> 00:36:59,319
Speaker 1: My Hanson's cake ran into a few things somehow, I'm

568
00:36:59,360 --> 00:37:02,359
Speaker 1: not quite sure or how it ended up on my glasses.

569
00:37:03,360 --> 00:37:04,200
Speaker 3: In my purse.

570
00:37:04,960 --> 00:37:07,440
Speaker 2: Well, it ran into a few things, including your fingers

571
00:37:07,440 --> 00:37:09,560
Speaker 2: and hands. I heard all about this on the ride home.

572
00:37:09,640 --> 00:37:12,160
Speaker 2: I don't today just make you blush.

573
00:37:12,480 --> 00:37:15,360
Speaker 3: I don't think so, just hot.

574
00:37:17,800 --> 00:37:24,160
Speaker 2: Hot flash anyway. Yeah, but my point was it was

575
00:37:24,200 --> 00:37:28,160
Speaker 2: just my big birthday. Wearing green. Of course looked amazing,

576
00:37:29,120 --> 00:37:31,640
Speaker 2: but I was sick. It was right after we had

577
00:37:31,680 --> 00:37:37,080
Speaker 2: the mold poisoning and I was so sick. I was

578
00:37:37,080 --> 00:37:40,719
Speaker 2: on antibiotics. I may I drank through it, but I

579
00:37:41,719 --> 00:37:45,720
Speaker 2: literally I was so sick during that birthday. So fingers

580
00:37:45,719 --> 00:37:48,880
Speaker 2: crossed and put it out there my fifty first birthday,

581
00:37:49,520 --> 00:37:52,799
Speaker 2: I'm going to be well and I'm going to have

582
00:37:52,960 --> 00:37:58,080
Speaker 2: a bomb ass birthday. What are we doing? Nothing planned?

583
00:37:58,320 --> 00:38:00,839
Speaker 2: I know Everyone's like, what do you want to do?

584
00:38:01,200 --> 00:38:04,359
Speaker 2: And I'm like, I'm me, I don't know. I hate surprises.

585
00:38:04,440 --> 00:38:08,680
Speaker 2: You guys all know that. You know what. That's old me.

586
00:38:08,880 --> 00:38:12,360
Speaker 2: I don't hate surprises. Surprise me away. Oh god, I

587
00:38:12,360 --> 00:38:16,279
Speaker 2: don't know, but that's that's me. I'm more focused. And

588
00:38:16,400 --> 00:38:18,719
Speaker 2: Memorial Day week and I'm like, three day weekend, what

589
00:38:18,719 --> 00:38:21,360
Speaker 2: do I do for the kids. Oh, it's pool season.

590
00:38:21,880 --> 00:38:25,919
Speaker 3: Like, I don't know, We'll come up with something really

591
00:38:26,000 --> 00:38:26,920
Speaker 3: fun for your birthday.

592
00:38:27,600 --> 00:38:31,680
Speaker 2: Kids can be so manipulative, as you know. I always

593
00:38:32,120 --> 00:38:34,600
Speaker 2: started to see the way that for my kids. I

594
00:38:34,640 --> 00:38:38,560
Speaker 2: was like, Hey, so maybe my birthday or you know,

595
00:38:38,760 --> 00:38:40,800
Speaker 2: one night that week, I'm gonna go out with friends

596
00:38:40,840 --> 00:38:43,080
Speaker 2: and I'll have like a friend night and like go

597
00:38:43,160 --> 00:38:47,040
Speaker 2: and do adult things and you know, go have drinks

598
00:38:47,080 --> 00:38:50,640
Speaker 2: and go, you know, like ad night out. And Stella

599
00:38:50,719 --> 00:38:53,040
Speaker 2: was like, you're not going to spend your birthday with us?

600
00:38:53,160 --> 00:38:56,600
Speaker 2: And I was like oh oh, And I was like

601
00:38:57,040 --> 00:38:59,839
Speaker 2: I tried to like justify it as moms do you think?

602
00:39:00,200 --> 00:39:03,560
Speaker 2: And You're like, well, it's a school night, so why

603
00:39:03,560 --> 00:39:06,000
Speaker 2: don't I go out that night and have like my

604
00:39:06,160 --> 00:39:09,480
Speaker 2: fun night out with my friends? And then I was like, baby,

605
00:39:09,560 --> 00:39:12,360
Speaker 2: it's all fun with you guys. And then that weekend

606
00:39:12,600 --> 00:39:17,120
Speaker 2: we'll have a weekend where we're all together. And she's like, okay,

607
00:39:17,239 --> 00:39:20,520
Speaker 2: if that's what you want, I was like, oh, that's

608
00:39:20,560 --> 00:39:24,799
Speaker 2: what I want. Like crap, this sucks, Like what are

609
00:39:24,800 --> 00:39:28,520
Speaker 2: we supposed to do? Like, okay on my birthday? You know,

610
00:39:30,160 --> 00:39:34,560
Speaker 2: this is my next chapter, Like I'm like doing me. Now,

611
00:39:35,120 --> 00:39:36,680
Speaker 2: what am I supposed to do? Like go out with

612
00:39:36,760 --> 00:39:41,120
Speaker 2: my five kids at six o'clock early bird special Chili's cool.

613
00:39:41,640 --> 00:39:44,160
Speaker 2: You guys will all be on the swipe the pad like, oh,

614
00:39:44,440 --> 00:39:46,960
Speaker 2: plant versus zombies, Like, no one will look at me.

615
00:39:47,360 --> 00:39:52,320
Speaker 2: I'll sit there sipping on my sake soke wishful thinking

616
00:39:53,040 --> 00:39:56,560
Speaker 2: Chili's ough. Great, I'll have to have the Sharennkes. They

617
00:39:56,560 --> 00:39:59,760
Speaker 2: don't even have a pinot Grisia. Fuck my life anyway.

618
00:40:00,360 --> 00:40:02,920
Speaker 3: I have the perfect solution.

619
00:40:04,000 --> 00:40:08,239
Speaker 1: Yes, go to one of those places in those minimals

620
00:40:08,680 --> 00:40:11,720
Speaker 1: and get yourself a happy ending for your birthday.

621
00:40:11,840 --> 00:40:17,680
Speaker 2: Ew no, thank you, No, I don't want that. How

622
00:40:17,719 --> 00:40:21,520
Speaker 2: do you guys feel? Sorry, I'm my tangent. How do

623
00:40:21,560 --> 00:40:25,440
Speaker 2: you guys feel about the new terminology body count?

624
00:40:25,719 --> 00:40:28,600
Speaker 3: I don't know what that is? Wait, what's that?

625
00:40:32,160 --> 00:40:36,000
Speaker 2: I heard this from the teens. Ps. All my teens

626
00:40:36,040 --> 00:40:40,560
Speaker 2: are super like not into this, Like they're very like

627
00:40:40,800 --> 00:40:48,640
Speaker 2: Donna Martin's good for them happy. But there's a thing

628
00:40:49,080 --> 00:40:54,279
Speaker 2: that the teens that aren't virgins say like, oh yeah,

629
00:40:54,400 --> 00:40:57,440
Speaker 2: my body count. Literally I heard body count. It was

630
00:40:57,480 --> 00:40:59,719
Speaker 2: like serial killer. I was like, how many bodies have

631
00:40:59,760 --> 00:41:01,680
Speaker 2: you been? I don't know how many people had you killed?

632
00:41:01,680 --> 00:41:05,560
Speaker 2: What the hell? And Stella was like, no, mom, you

633
00:41:05,680 --> 00:41:09,320
Speaker 2: know what that means? Like you're so uncool, like everyone

634
00:41:09,360 --> 00:41:12,879
Speaker 2: says it. It's how many people you've slept with, it's

635
00:41:12,920 --> 00:41:16,880
Speaker 2: your body count, oh dow. Yeah, we used to just

636
00:41:17,000 --> 00:41:19,880
Speaker 2: keep a list, like on paper.

637
00:41:20,360 --> 00:41:22,799
Speaker 3: I don't even want what we did.

638
00:41:23,280 --> 00:41:25,759
Speaker 1: I don't know whatever happened to that list, which is

639
00:41:25,760 --> 00:41:26,560
Speaker 1: a little frightening.

640
00:41:27,040 --> 00:41:31,000
Speaker 2: So I was that girl that was like a numbers girl,

641
00:41:31,239 --> 00:41:34,799
Speaker 2: and I was like, I lose my virginity till I

642
00:41:34,880 --> 00:41:39,360
Speaker 2: was over eighteen. And it's like getting my earspurs, like

643
00:41:39,440 --> 00:41:41,840
Speaker 2: I'm not you know, didn't do it till I was eighteen,

644
00:41:41,960 --> 00:41:45,440
Speaker 2: not going to do it till I'm forty. So I cried,

645
00:41:45,640 --> 00:41:48,919
Speaker 2: you guys, I bawled my eyes out when I went

646
00:41:49,160 --> 00:41:51,919
Speaker 2: over one hand, and I'm talking about the number five

647
00:41:52,400 --> 00:41:55,600
Speaker 2: when I had slept with more than five people. I

648
00:41:55,920 --> 00:42:00,360
Speaker 2: cried so hard and was like internally beating myself up

649
00:42:00,480 --> 00:42:03,560
Speaker 2: like I am a whore, Oh my god. And I

650
00:42:03,640 --> 00:42:06,560
Speaker 2: wasn't young. It was spread out through the years, like

651
00:42:06,840 --> 00:42:10,759
Speaker 2: well into my way into my twenties five, and I

652
00:42:10,800 --> 00:42:14,400
Speaker 2: was like, oh my god, I have had another hand.

653
00:42:14,800 --> 00:42:20,959
Speaker 2: And I was so sad. Now granted, you know men,

654
00:42:21,239 --> 00:42:23,839
Speaker 2: you know, it's like another notch for my belt. Wait,

655
00:42:23,840 --> 00:42:26,120
Speaker 2: what do they say? Now? I'm sure that's not cool anymore.

656
00:42:26,680 --> 00:42:29,520
Speaker 2: Like whatever, like men can sleep. They want to like

657
00:42:29,680 --> 00:42:33,880
Speaker 2: up the number like hundreds, you know, and you're like ooh.

658
00:42:33,920 --> 00:42:37,799
Speaker 2: Like girls, I feel like we are just like oh no,

659
00:42:37,840 --> 00:42:40,200
Speaker 2: we want the number low. But I hear that's not

660
00:42:40,280 --> 00:42:44,360
Speaker 2: the new generation then, you know, because women are empowered.

661
00:42:44,360 --> 00:42:47,840
Speaker 2: They're like, well you know that's and they're like proud

662
00:42:47,880 --> 00:42:51,160
Speaker 2: of their body count. I'm like, uh uh, I can't

663
00:42:51,160 --> 00:42:54,960
Speaker 2: invest in that, Like why was I talking about this anyway?

664
00:42:55,160 --> 00:42:57,719
Speaker 2: I don't want a happy ending? What else? What else

665
00:42:57,760 --> 00:43:00,319
Speaker 2: can I do for my birthday? I do you guys?

666
00:43:00,320 --> 00:43:00,680
Speaker 5: You know what?

667
00:43:00,840 --> 00:43:02,279
Speaker 2: You know what the truth is. I do want a

668
00:43:02,280 --> 00:43:05,040
Speaker 2: happy ending, and it doesn't involve sex. It doesn't involve

669
00:43:05,160 --> 00:43:09,759
Speaker 2: anything physical. I want my happy ending. I'm not like,

670
00:43:10,280 --> 00:43:13,080
Speaker 2: here's the thing about me. I feel like I never

671
00:43:13,360 --> 00:43:18,080
Speaker 2: am jaded and there's always that like light inside of me. Yeah,

672
00:43:18,239 --> 00:43:21,920
Speaker 2: Jenny calls me Paulianna. She's like, Okay, this positivity, but

673
00:43:22,200 --> 00:43:26,000
Speaker 2: it's a fact, like I can find hope in anything

674
00:43:26,000 --> 00:43:28,600
Speaker 2: and I never get discouraged. And I call it. You

675
00:43:28,640 --> 00:43:30,879
Speaker 2: know a lot of people, I feel like people put

676
00:43:30,920 --> 00:43:36,040
Speaker 2: your fire out. And Dean said something that actually resonated

677
00:43:36,200 --> 00:43:40,680
Speaker 2: in an article. He said he saw my light dim

678
00:43:40,960 --> 00:43:43,279
Speaker 2: that final fight we had before we split up and

679
00:43:43,320 --> 00:43:46,680
Speaker 2: separate it, and I was like, I had to think

680
00:43:46,719 --> 00:43:49,760
Speaker 2: about that one. I was like, wow, he did. Yeah,

681
00:43:49,800 --> 00:43:54,279
Speaker 2: it flickered, it dimmed a little, but it's not going

682
00:43:54,360 --> 00:43:59,040
Speaker 2: out like It's like, I feel like my flame is

683
00:43:59,080 --> 00:44:04,880
Speaker 2: burning brighter than ever inside, and so yeah, I do

684
00:44:05,080 --> 00:44:09,280
Speaker 2: deserve that happy ending. I'm getting there and I'm hopeful

685
00:44:09,800 --> 00:44:14,120
Speaker 2: and I'm going to make it happen. Light it up, bitch,