1 00:00:08,720 --> 00:00:12,799 Speaker 1: Misspelling with Tory spelling an iHeartRadio podcast. 2 00:00:15,560 --> 00:00:19,959 Speaker 2: It's May, you guys, it's a huge month for me. 3 00:00:20,520 --> 00:00:24,119 Speaker 2: Well it was a huge month. It's still a huge month. 4 00:00:24,400 --> 00:00:28,160 Speaker 2: So anyway, let me jump right in. I would always 5 00:00:28,160 --> 00:00:32,480 Speaker 2: tell Dean that he didn't plan on this, but when 6 00:00:32,720 --> 00:00:37,440 Speaker 2: we got together and decided to get married May seventh, 7 00:00:38,960 --> 00:00:42,159 Speaker 2: we eloped, planned a whole wedding by ourselves on a 8 00:00:42,159 --> 00:00:46,720 Speaker 2: private highland in Fiji. Oh it was so good. You know. 9 00:00:46,960 --> 00:00:49,400 Speaker 2: We didn't think long term. We were just like in 10 00:00:49,440 --> 00:00:53,400 Speaker 2: the moment. So then all of a sudden we got pregnant. 11 00:00:53,440 --> 00:00:57,160 Speaker 2: You know. I had a baby a year later ish, 12 00:00:57,960 --> 00:01:00,800 Speaker 2: so Mother's Day became a thing, and then my birthday. 13 00:01:01,040 --> 00:01:04,800 Speaker 2: So I would always be like, hey, buddy, sorry, you're screwed. 14 00:01:04,840 --> 00:01:10,400 Speaker 2: You got three Tory days to deal with, essentially in May, 15 00:01:11,520 --> 00:01:13,320 Speaker 2: and then there's May Day and synco to my own 16 00:01:13,400 --> 00:01:18,679 Speaker 2: things like that. But so anyway, this never really was 17 00:01:18,720 --> 00:01:22,120 Speaker 2: something I thought about, because it's just, you know, wheels 18 00:01:22,120 --> 00:01:24,880 Speaker 2: in motion, you go along. We were married eighteen years 19 00:01:25,560 --> 00:01:29,080 Speaker 2: until no joke. Two days ago one of my best friends, 20 00:01:30,160 --> 00:01:35,360 Speaker 2: Bill Gunkle. Bill said to me, oh, he's an organizer. 21 00:01:35,400 --> 00:01:38,040 Speaker 2: He likes a good cleanup of his calendar. He said, oh, 22 00:01:38,400 --> 00:01:41,760 Speaker 2: I just realized I'm able to remove May seventh, your 23 00:01:41,920 --> 00:01:46,760 Speaker 2: wedding anniversary from my calendar, and that that kind of 24 00:01:46,840 --> 00:01:50,880 Speaker 2: hit me and I was like, oh, wow, yeah, I mean, 25 00:01:51,480 --> 00:01:54,360 Speaker 2: obviously I felled for divorce. Obviously we're getting a divorce, 26 00:01:55,000 --> 00:01:58,960 Speaker 2: but I hadn't thought about that, and I was like, wow, 27 00:01:59,080 --> 00:02:02,640 Speaker 2: that maya like May seventh is just going to be 28 00:02:02,640 --> 00:02:07,000 Speaker 2: another day from now on. And that made me kind 29 00:02:07,040 --> 00:02:10,240 Speaker 2: of think about a lot of things. And I was 30 00:02:10,480 --> 00:02:16,200 Speaker 2: that girl that took a lot of pride in anniversaries 31 00:02:16,280 --> 00:02:21,320 Speaker 2: like our wedding anniversary was you know me, I'm if 32 00:02:21,320 --> 00:02:25,080 Speaker 2: you don't know me, welcome to me. I'm a di wire. 33 00:02:25,400 --> 00:02:28,240 Speaker 2: I'm a crafter to the core. All my kids came 34 00:02:28,280 --> 00:02:31,400 Speaker 2: out of you to row crafting because I made them. 35 00:02:32,360 --> 00:02:37,400 Speaker 2: And yeah, so I would always make something for Dean 36 00:02:37,760 --> 00:02:41,760 Speaker 2: on our wedding anniversary because you know, I mean, obviously, 37 00:02:41,919 --> 00:02:46,560 Speaker 2: you know, anyone can buy someone something allegedly, but if 38 00:02:46,560 --> 00:02:48,840 Speaker 2: you can, that's very nice. But I feel like I 39 00:02:48,880 --> 00:02:52,520 Speaker 2: always say homemade equals love and it you know, whether 40 00:02:52,600 --> 00:02:54,560 Speaker 2: that's in the past, the present, or the future. I 41 00:02:54,639 --> 00:02:59,399 Speaker 2: still maintain that and I'm more of a traditional girl. Yeah, 42 00:02:59,440 --> 00:03:03,240 Speaker 2: I know, shot right, with a lot of modern values. 43 00:03:03,880 --> 00:03:08,040 Speaker 2: So I'm kind of like fifty to fifty no pun intended, 44 00:03:08,200 --> 00:03:13,359 Speaker 2: like I'm half fifty's housewife and half like futuristic like barbaralla, 45 00:03:14,520 --> 00:03:17,760 Speaker 2: and I would always go to there's a traditional list 46 00:03:17,840 --> 00:03:22,160 Speaker 2: so you can like google this traditional wedding anniversary presence 47 00:03:22,520 --> 00:03:24,679 Speaker 2: and then a modern one, which I don't know when 48 00:03:24,720 --> 00:03:28,120 Speaker 2: that all separated, Like when did someone say, hey, we're 49 00:03:28,120 --> 00:03:31,280 Speaker 2: going to throw in like a new wedding anniversary. This 50 00:03:31,400 --> 00:03:34,440 Speaker 2: is the modern one, Like what's wrong with the traditional one? 51 00:03:34,480 --> 00:03:37,320 Speaker 2: Like well, if a name broke, well I fix it. 52 00:03:37,360 --> 00:03:39,600 Speaker 2: But anyway, it gave me options, So that was always 53 00:03:39,640 --> 00:03:42,480 Speaker 2: good because some years I was like, ooh, I can 54 00:03:42,560 --> 00:03:44,560 Speaker 2: craft something with that, and some years I was like, 55 00:03:45,080 --> 00:03:47,280 Speaker 2: not so great on the traditional, let me check the modern. 56 00:03:48,960 --> 00:03:54,040 Speaker 2: But every year I would make him something and super proud, 57 00:03:54,120 --> 00:03:57,320 Speaker 2: and I'm talking like one year it was leather, so 58 00:03:57,440 --> 00:04:01,920 Speaker 2: I made him like a leather cuff and had it 59 00:04:02,040 --> 00:04:04,640 Speaker 2: stamped in like our anniversary ran the back and just 60 00:04:04,680 --> 00:04:08,760 Speaker 2: like a really cool thing. One year. I know this 61 00:04:09,120 --> 00:04:12,920 Speaker 2: because I just found it in storage recently, you know 62 00:04:13,080 --> 00:04:16,279 Speaker 2: my storage woes. That's a good one and so storage 63 00:04:16,279 --> 00:04:19,599 Speaker 2: wars my storage woes. Rthan add that to the list 64 00:04:19,640 --> 00:04:23,880 Speaker 2: for something to make in the future. Cool. I found 65 00:04:24,400 --> 00:04:30,080 Speaker 2: a bench that I made him and no joke. I well, 66 00:04:30,120 --> 00:04:32,000 Speaker 2: my friend Chris came over and helped me. I have 67 00:04:32,040 --> 00:04:34,520 Speaker 2: to give a credit where credit is due. But I 68 00:04:34,600 --> 00:04:37,760 Speaker 2: went to the lumberyard. And I don't know why I 69 00:04:37,760 --> 00:04:39,440 Speaker 2: had to say it like that, because woman can go 70 00:04:39,480 --> 00:04:42,480 Speaker 2: to the lumberyard too and be like, I'm at the lumberyard. 71 00:04:42,560 --> 00:04:46,880 Speaker 2: But I went to the lumberyard and got really cool 72 00:04:47,000 --> 00:04:54,000 Speaker 2: pieces of wood. Sorry, and made the bench. Took a 73 00:04:54,040 --> 00:04:58,800 Speaker 2: stencil and wrote on it, I want to grow old 74 00:04:58,839 --> 00:05:01,520 Speaker 2: with you or something. Look, I'm conveniently like blocking it 75 00:05:01,560 --> 00:05:05,680 Speaker 2: out because it hurts, but it doesn't hurt. I done inside, 76 00:05:05,720 --> 00:05:11,200 Speaker 2: but it fine. I have feelings. Anyone jump out? 77 00:05:11,200 --> 00:05:15,520 Speaker 3: How big was the bench? Like? Could one person sit 78 00:05:15,600 --> 00:05:16,640 Speaker 3: on it or multiple? 79 00:05:16,839 --> 00:05:20,440 Speaker 2: Or it was supposed to be a bench for two. 80 00:05:21,000 --> 00:05:25,560 Speaker 2: And the inspiration behind it was, you know, you see 81 00:05:25,560 --> 00:05:31,120 Speaker 2: those cute old couple sitting on a bench and oh 82 00:05:31,160 --> 00:05:34,080 Speaker 2: my god, I'm tearing up. I do have feelings. Look 83 00:05:34,120 --> 00:05:44,600 Speaker 2: at that chickxus. The intention was that all these beautiful 84 00:05:44,600 --> 00:05:48,360 Speaker 2: babies we had created together they would go on to 85 00:05:48,360 --> 00:05:52,280 Speaker 2: have families of their own. And I am always and 86 00:05:52,360 --> 00:05:56,919 Speaker 2: will remain always excited to grow our family because you 87 00:05:56,960 --> 00:06:00,159 Speaker 2: know what, at the end of the day, he and 88 00:06:00,320 --> 00:06:04,799 Speaker 2: I and our kids were a family unit. He's the father. 89 00:06:04,960 --> 00:06:09,000 Speaker 2: You know, whether we're married and together or not, you know, 90 00:06:09,279 --> 00:06:13,960 Speaker 2: we're all in this together. And excited to be a 91 00:06:14,000 --> 00:06:18,200 Speaker 2: grandmother and a great grandmother and yeah, and watching our 92 00:06:18,279 --> 00:06:20,720 Speaker 2: family grow and grow and grow. I mean, we got 93 00:06:20,800 --> 00:06:23,520 Speaker 2: five kids, so I better have a lot of fun. 94 00:06:23,920 --> 00:06:24,560 Speaker 3: A big bench. 95 00:06:25,640 --> 00:06:31,920 Speaker 2: No, the benching for them. M the bench isn't for them. 96 00:06:32,520 --> 00:06:36,320 Speaker 2: The bench was for he and I to sit on 97 00:06:36,360 --> 00:06:38,520 Speaker 2: it together. Like those photos you see of like old 98 00:06:38,560 --> 00:06:42,080 Speaker 2: couples still holding hands. We used to send pictures to 99 00:06:42,160 --> 00:06:45,480 Speaker 2: each other with like old couples you would see and 100 00:06:45,560 --> 00:06:48,920 Speaker 2: like still holding hands, and it's like wow, And we did. 101 00:06:49,000 --> 00:06:51,440 Speaker 2: We always held hands. That was like a thing, except 102 00:06:52,320 --> 00:06:54,760 Speaker 2: except in like the last year or two. I guess, 103 00:06:55,040 --> 00:06:56,839 Speaker 2: I guess. Yeah, that was one of the one of 104 00:06:56,839 --> 00:07:02,560 Speaker 2: the signs there were fifty million. But yeah, like you 105 00:07:02,600 --> 00:07:05,719 Speaker 2: would see those couples in their eighties, like still walking 106 00:07:05,760 --> 00:07:09,920 Speaker 2: down the street holding hands. I mean they just otherwise 107 00:07:09,920 --> 00:07:12,000 Speaker 2: would fall down. They had to support each other. They 108 00:07:12,240 --> 00:07:16,080 Speaker 2: couldn't walk straight without each other. But nonetheless, I bought 109 00:07:16,080 --> 00:07:20,600 Speaker 2: into the love story and I was like, oh my gosh, 110 00:07:20,640 --> 00:07:24,080 Speaker 2: that's so cute. Like we'd see, you know, pictures of 111 00:07:24,120 --> 00:07:26,880 Speaker 2: couples like at the beach and just like doing things 112 00:07:26,880 --> 00:07:30,640 Speaker 2: and just still, you know, in it. 113 00:07:30,920 --> 00:07:33,880 Speaker 3: So you made the bench? Was that like with hammer 114 00:07:34,280 --> 00:07:36,480 Speaker 3: and nails or was it glued together. 115 00:07:36,320 --> 00:07:40,160 Speaker 2: Or I screwed it in? I had nails. It was 116 00:07:40,240 --> 00:07:45,320 Speaker 2: stable as fuck, like that impressive. We'll till it wasn't 117 00:07:46,040 --> 00:07:46,520 Speaker 2: it broke? 118 00:07:47,400 --> 00:07:51,120 Speaker 3: What other things did you make besides the match for 119 00:07:51,160 --> 00:07:52,080 Speaker 3: your anniversaries? 120 00:07:53,360 --> 00:07:57,760 Speaker 2: Oh my god, I made there's a specific name for it, 121 00:07:57,800 --> 00:07:59,400 Speaker 2: when you make a tray that you put your like 122 00:07:59,480 --> 00:08:02,840 Speaker 2: jewelry or men put their their watch. I made him 123 00:08:02,840 --> 00:08:06,760 Speaker 2: a Valet tray. And I got a tray and I 124 00:08:06,800 --> 00:08:12,520 Speaker 2: went round this took a while, and found pennies from 125 00:08:13,600 --> 00:08:16,880 Speaker 2: the year he was born nineteen sixty six, the year 126 00:08:16,920 --> 00:08:19,960 Speaker 2: I was born nineteen seventy three, and the year we 127 00:08:19,960 --> 00:08:23,880 Speaker 2: were married two thousand and six. And I got those 128 00:08:23,920 --> 00:08:28,040 Speaker 2: pennies and I glued them and mod podge the shit 129 00:08:28,160 --> 00:08:30,720 Speaker 2: out of that. Oh god, I'm a good mod podger. 130 00:08:33,520 --> 00:08:35,960 Speaker 2: I had to get back into that. That was my 131 00:08:36,080 --> 00:08:40,840 Speaker 2: strong suit. And I made this tray that was just 132 00:08:41,520 --> 00:08:45,080 Speaker 2: very functional, like it was all blacked and shit. He 133 00:08:45,120 --> 00:08:49,040 Speaker 2: appreciated all the gifts I made him, but yeah, that 134 00:08:49,160 --> 00:08:52,800 Speaker 2: was a good one. Leather cuff. If you tell me 135 00:08:53,480 --> 00:08:55,200 Speaker 2: one of the traditional ones, I can tell you what 136 00:08:55,240 --> 00:08:55,680 Speaker 2: I made. 137 00:08:55,559 --> 00:09:00,360 Speaker 3: Him, paper metal, gold, silver. 138 00:09:02,320 --> 00:09:03,560 Speaker 2: No, I'm blanket, I've got nothing. 139 00:09:04,760 --> 00:09:05,800 Speaker 3: Oh m. 140 00:09:06,480 --> 00:09:10,559 Speaker 2: The brass cockering was really good that year. That's really 141 00:09:10,960 --> 00:09:16,880 Speaker 2: I hammered it. Oh my god, I'm so talented. Welded 142 00:09:16,920 --> 00:09:22,240 Speaker 2: it well. Wow, going back to the bench, it says 143 00:09:22,800 --> 00:09:27,080 Speaker 2: grow old with me dot dot dot. Yeah. On the 144 00:09:27,160 --> 00:09:31,520 Speaker 2: legs were our wedding date, and then on the other 145 00:09:31,640 --> 00:09:35,320 Speaker 2: leg was are the current date. And we put it 146 00:09:35,360 --> 00:09:40,400 Speaker 2: in each house. We moved a lot, a lot because 147 00:09:40,440 --> 00:09:43,680 Speaker 2: I was always chasing the dream. Like you know, it 148 00:09:43,800 --> 00:09:47,800 Speaker 2: wasn't us, it wasn't the relationship. It was the house. 149 00:09:49,000 --> 00:09:52,880 Speaker 2: Oh that reminds me of a horror film. It's not 150 00:09:53,040 --> 00:09:59,319 Speaker 2: the house, it's your son. Ooh, insidious one. Fuck yeah, 151 00:09:59,360 --> 00:10:04,800 Speaker 2: I nailed it, still got it, thank you. So that 152 00:10:05,080 --> 00:10:09,720 Speaker 2: resonated like every horror film. It wasn't the house, it 153 00:10:09,840 --> 00:10:13,360 Speaker 2: was never the house. So I kept moving and kept moving, 154 00:10:13,400 --> 00:10:18,880 Speaker 2: and let's start where it all began. When we got married. 155 00:10:20,120 --> 00:10:23,439 Speaker 2: We were filming my series So Notorious, and Diana and 156 00:10:23,520 --> 00:10:27,240 Speaker 2: I got together while we were filming that, and anyway, 157 00:10:27,440 --> 00:10:33,000 Speaker 2: the set designer helped me create this amazing like iron 158 00:10:33,160 --> 00:10:38,479 Speaker 2: stand with a cute plaque that said McDermott Baby Farm 159 00:10:38,640 --> 00:10:42,520 Speaker 2: established two thousand and six. The day we got married, 160 00:10:45,280 --> 00:10:49,000 Speaker 2: I was a farm. I was like, pull pushing them out. 161 00:10:49,800 --> 00:10:54,040 Speaker 2: Mine's the push, ripping that zipper open, taking them out. 162 00:10:55,720 --> 00:10:58,440 Speaker 2: So we put that and moved that so many times 163 00:10:58,520 --> 00:11:01,760 Speaker 2: until I mean it was weathered and cracked and just 164 00:11:03,400 --> 00:11:07,920 Speaker 2: the demise of that. Yeah. But the bench, the bench 165 00:11:08,000 --> 00:11:12,000 Speaker 2: survived till it fell to pieces. It got rained on. 166 00:11:12,120 --> 00:11:14,520 Speaker 2: I didn't think of that that the rain would wear 167 00:11:14,559 --> 00:11:19,880 Speaker 2: on it. It rusted, it broke, you guys. That's I 168 00:11:19,880 --> 00:11:22,520 Speaker 2: guess what the heart of it is is that it broke. 169 00:11:22,559 --> 00:11:29,160 Speaker 2: And when it broke, I put too much emotional symbolism 170 00:11:29,400 --> 00:11:34,199 Speaker 2: and placement on. As Dean has told me in adamant objects. 171 00:11:35,360 --> 00:11:38,240 Speaker 2: At some point it just was getting wobbly, it was 172 00:11:38,240 --> 00:11:42,520 Speaker 2: getting shaky, and I was like the bench and we'd 173 00:11:42,520 --> 00:11:45,079 Speaker 2: moved in. He's like, oh, the bench is a little wobbly. 174 00:11:45,120 --> 00:11:47,360 Speaker 2: I was like, oh, we got to fix it. We 175 00:11:47,400 --> 00:11:51,400 Speaker 2: got to fix it, and we never fixed it, so 176 00:11:51,440 --> 00:11:55,719 Speaker 2: eventually it broke. Oh I kept it though, I kept 177 00:11:55,760 --> 00:11:58,560 Speaker 2: the wood pieces, of course I did, saying I'm going 178 00:11:58,600 --> 00:12:02,240 Speaker 2: to put it back together, and then sat in the 179 00:12:02,240 --> 00:12:09,480 Speaker 2: garage in pieces for a few years, like my marriage basically, 180 00:12:10,840 --> 00:12:12,439 Speaker 2: and then I found in storage. 181 00:12:13,240 --> 00:12:15,840 Speaker 3: So and what did you do with it? 182 00:12:16,520 --> 00:12:19,520 Speaker 2: Uh? Duh? I took a picture of it to show 183 00:12:19,559 --> 00:12:20,480 Speaker 2: to you, guys. I don't know. 184 00:12:21,480 --> 00:12:23,480 Speaker 1: No, I mean, did you do you still have it? 185 00:12:23,559 --> 00:12:26,480 Speaker 1: Did you throw the pieces away? Is it sitting in 186 00:12:26,520 --> 00:12:29,120 Speaker 1: that last storage lockery still at. 187 00:12:28,960 --> 00:12:31,560 Speaker 2: I have no storagelockers, so I'm done that you've. 188 00:12:31,400 --> 00:12:32,120 Speaker 3: Had one left? 189 00:12:32,440 --> 00:12:32,800 Speaker 2: Nope? 190 00:12:33,160 --> 00:12:34,839 Speaker 3: Congratulations, thank you? 191 00:12:44,400 --> 00:12:46,520 Speaker 2: Oh my god, my heart just sink. I'm panic now. 192 00:12:46,559 --> 00:12:49,960 Speaker 2: I don't know where it is. I feel like you, guys, 193 00:12:50,559 --> 00:12:54,880 Speaker 2: I need to burn it. No, no, don't burn it. 194 00:12:55,400 --> 00:12:56,160 Speaker 2: Can you not do that? 195 00:12:57,040 --> 00:13:00,000 Speaker 3: I don't know. I think the metaphor is better now 196 00:13:00,080 --> 00:13:00,960 Speaker 3: without burning it. 197 00:13:01,600 --> 00:13:03,560 Speaker 2: Oh, it's metatorical. 198 00:13:05,160 --> 00:13:06,760 Speaker 1: Here's what I think you should do if you can 199 00:13:06,800 --> 00:13:10,600 Speaker 1: find it, is take a little piece of that wood 200 00:13:11,520 --> 00:13:14,760 Speaker 1: and put it in like a box picture frame, and 201 00:13:14,880 --> 00:13:17,439 Speaker 1: just as a keepsake, you know, a piece a piece 202 00:13:17,480 --> 00:13:18,040 Speaker 1: of the bench. 203 00:13:18,600 --> 00:13:22,560 Speaker 3: I don't think you need to burn it. You know, 204 00:13:22,960 --> 00:13:24,319 Speaker 3: you guys are on good terms. 205 00:13:24,679 --> 00:13:26,840 Speaker 2: No, no, no, I didn't mean, uh, I don't know 206 00:13:26,840 --> 00:13:29,520 Speaker 2: why I'm gonna cry. I didn't mean burn it like 207 00:13:30,320 --> 00:13:33,400 Speaker 2: bad for him. I mean burning it as a symbolism 208 00:13:33,440 --> 00:13:37,440 Speaker 2: of letting go right past and moving on at the 209 00:13:37,480 --> 00:13:40,160 Speaker 2: future is not what you do. 210 00:13:41,000 --> 00:13:42,360 Speaker 3: I think you can totally do that. 211 00:13:42,720 --> 00:13:47,000 Speaker 1: What matters is if the symbolism means something to you, right, 212 00:13:47,280 --> 00:13:51,880 Speaker 1: It's like, if that to you means moving on, letting 213 00:13:51,880 --> 00:13:54,199 Speaker 1: it go, then it will would probably be a good 214 00:13:54,240 --> 00:13:54,559 Speaker 1: thing for. 215 00:13:54,520 --> 00:13:57,120 Speaker 2: You to do. Well, I'm not going to grow old 216 00:13:57,200 --> 00:13:57,760 Speaker 2: with him. 217 00:13:58,720 --> 00:14:01,280 Speaker 1: So well you you know what you kind of are 218 00:14:01,960 --> 00:14:05,040 Speaker 1: just not as a married couple. You know, you're still 219 00:14:05,960 --> 00:14:10,840 Speaker 1: you're still tied by five amazing children. So it's just 220 00:14:11,120 --> 00:14:13,200 Speaker 1: a different kind of growing up. 221 00:14:13,240 --> 00:14:15,439 Speaker 2: I don't like regular ties. Can we double not it? 222 00:14:15,760 --> 00:14:18,000 Speaker 3: You will find somebody, Oh my god, you. 223 00:14:18,040 --> 00:14:21,240 Speaker 2: Guys every week this is not going to be about me, like, 224 00:14:21,480 --> 00:14:25,600 Speaker 2: oh no, poor me, I'm alone and single. Oh, or 225 00:14:25,640 --> 00:14:29,880 Speaker 2: it can be. I mean, I don't know. Can we 226 00:14:29,920 --> 00:14:32,160 Speaker 2: go back to it for a second, Yeah, can we 227 00:14:32,200 --> 00:14:34,560 Speaker 2: look up what would have been? Just tell me what 228 00:14:34,600 --> 00:14:36,200 Speaker 2: it would have been. I'll tell you what I'd make. 229 00:14:36,600 --> 00:14:37,680 Speaker 3: Hit year would this have been? 230 00:14:38,120 --> 00:14:43,160 Speaker 2: This would be eighteen? Correct, eighteen. I always say we 231 00:14:43,160 --> 00:14:46,440 Speaker 2: were married eighteen years, but technically I'm not divorced yet, 232 00:14:46,560 --> 00:14:52,240 Speaker 2: so it's not final. So true, I wasn't lying. Parcelain porcelain. 233 00:14:53,640 --> 00:15:03,240 Speaker 2: Oh good teeth. Here you go, buddy, I'm gonna make 234 00:15:03,280 --> 00:15:06,760 Speaker 2: a necklace out of them. How woud his girlfriend feel 235 00:15:06,840 --> 00:15:11,640 Speaker 2: about that? If you ever loved me, you won't wear 236 00:15:11,800 --> 00:15:20,200 Speaker 2: my porcelain teeth around your neck? Five of them for 237 00:15:20,280 --> 00:15:23,240 Speaker 2: the five beautiful kids we made. How can you say 238 00:15:23,280 --> 00:15:27,360 Speaker 2: no to that? Sorry, Lily, you know I love you. Okay, 239 00:15:29,720 --> 00:15:35,440 Speaker 2: we had a vow renewal at four years in. I mean, 240 00:15:35,880 --> 00:15:40,720 Speaker 2: granted it was we did it on our reality show 241 00:15:40,760 --> 00:15:47,440 Speaker 2: Torri and Dean Home Sweet Hollywood. But that's crazy now. 242 00:15:47,480 --> 00:15:52,720 Speaker 2: I call it the bowel removal. By the way, unpacking. 243 00:15:53,000 --> 00:16:00,880 Speaker 2: Speaking of unpacking from storage, my daughter Stella brings in 244 00:16:00,920 --> 00:16:09,280 Speaker 2: a box. This just happened yesterday and she goes, of course, 245 00:16:09,440 --> 00:16:14,640 Speaker 2: she's sassy, God, she's so clever, and she goes, I 246 00:16:14,720 --> 00:16:18,000 Speaker 2: unpacked this box, and I was like, oh, this is 247 00:16:18,040 --> 00:16:22,240 Speaker 2: not coming into the house. So she led with that, 248 00:16:22,320 --> 00:16:25,720 Speaker 2: which crushed my soul. I was like, that's an antique. 249 00:16:26,000 --> 00:16:28,400 Speaker 2: What do you mean. I got that at a flea market. 250 00:16:28,440 --> 00:16:33,520 Speaker 2: That's very chic. And anyway, I digress, and she goes 251 00:16:33,560 --> 00:16:36,400 Speaker 2: and then I opened it. You guys, the thing she 252 00:16:36,600 --> 00:16:40,160 Speaker 2: found in this box, I can't make this shit up. 253 00:16:40,680 --> 00:16:44,720 Speaker 2: First of all, oh my god, it was like a 254 00:16:44,760 --> 00:16:47,880 Speaker 2: paperback flip through book of nine oh two one oh, 255 00:16:48,120 --> 00:16:51,119 Speaker 2: like a small one from the nineties. 256 00:16:51,560 --> 00:16:51,680 Speaker 1: Uh. 257 00:16:51,960 --> 00:16:57,080 Speaker 2: It was an intact fully wrapped bubblegum pack of our 258 00:16:57,200 --> 00:17:01,040 Speaker 2: cards and bubblegum, which she asked if they could like 259 00:17:01,240 --> 00:17:03,960 Speaker 2: do some like challenge and eat it, and I was 260 00:17:04,040 --> 00:17:06,560 Speaker 2: like nope. And I was like, I have to get 261 00:17:06,640 --> 00:17:08,480 Speaker 2: new teeth. I don't want you guys to as well. 262 00:17:08,640 --> 00:17:13,119 Speaker 2: That's that's gonna be hard. Two of them. Wonder how 263 00:17:13,200 --> 00:17:14,280 Speaker 2: much I could sell those for. 264 00:17:16,040 --> 00:17:18,080 Speaker 3: That's definitely a collector's I. 265 00:17:18,000 --> 00:17:23,679 Speaker 2: Know, like a polaroid photo from a photo shoot. Nino 266 00:17:23,680 --> 00:17:28,439 Speaker 2: two and o still intact a bag of teeth. 267 00:17:30,320 --> 00:17:33,800 Speaker 1: No, we have made a bag of teeth, real teeth, 268 00:17:34,280 --> 00:17:35,920 Speaker 1: a bag of teeth. 269 00:17:36,320 --> 00:17:40,600 Speaker 2: So it's like, oh sentimental Nino two and o oh, 270 00:17:40,640 --> 00:17:43,320 Speaker 2: look at that picture. Oh my god, you look so 271 00:17:43,640 --> 00:17:48,639 Speaker 2: great anyhow, and then the bag of teeth and she 272 00:17:48,800 --> 00:17:52,800 Speaker 2: was like, mom, what are these? And I was like, oh, 273 00:17:52,840 --> 00:17:56,720 Speaker 2: those are my wisdom teeth and she goes, that's disgusting. 274 00:17:57,480 --> 00:18:00,320 Speaker 2: Can I throw these away? I was like absolutely not. 275 00:18:01,359 --> 00:18:03,000 Speaker 2: And she goes, what are you gonna do with them? 276 00:18:03,720 --> 00:18:06,600 Speaker 2: When'd you get your wisdom teeth out? And I was like, 277 00:18:06,840 --> 00:18:11,600 Speaker 2: uh sixteen. She goes, that's disgusting. Yeah, root and all 278 00:18:11,840 --> 00:18:18,240 Speaker 2: all four perfectly intact. Might I add, oh, correction, those 279 00:18:18,359 --> 00:18:21,119 Speaker 2: I will send to Dean because mine are all shaved 280 00:18:21,119 --> 00:18:26,320 Speaker 2: to nubs because I'm getting finnars owed to my creepy past. Okay, 281 00:18:26,680 --> 00:18:29,480 Speaker 2: I'm gonna go on. This is my twenties from my 282 00:18:29,640 --> 00:18:34,720 Speaker 2: first TV movie I did in Canada. This is when 283 00:18:34,840 --> 00:18:37,760 Speaker 2: like they had smoke shops, but like La, it wasn't 284 00:18:37,760 --> 00:18:42,160 Speaker 2: a thing. And I got like the coolest Oh my god, 285 00:18:42,280 --> 00:18:45,080 Speaker 2: it's a cube and it's metal and it's like a 286 00:18:45,160 --> 00:18:48,639 Speaker 2: one hit. Back then we'd say pot. Now it's like 287 00:18:48,760 --> 00:18:51,480 Speaker 2: weed and it was a cube and I was like, Aha, 288 00:18:52,280 --> 00:18:55,439 Speaker 2: I'm gonna come back to LA and invent this because 289 00:18:55,560 --> 00:18:58,840 Speaker 2: no one has it in the States. Another thing I 290 00:18:58,880 --> 00:19:03,440 Speaker 2: put on my checklist of inventions. But she was like mom, 291 00:19:03,720 --> 00:19:08,640 Speaker 2: and I was like, whoa, it was the nineties, Like yeah, 292 00:19:09,200 --> 00:19:11,560 Speaker 2: mom had like a little bit of a stoner phase, 293 00:19:11,920 --> 00:19:16,960 Speaker 2: Like sorry, there was that, and what else. There was 294 00:19:17,040 --> 00:19:21,160 Speaker 2: a couple more creepy things that I was just like, yeah, oh, 295 00:19:21,880 --> 00:19:25,440 Speaker 2: I know what. It was a G string. It was clean. 296 00:19:25,600 --> 00:19:28,160 Speaker 2: I did a smell test. It was clean. You guys. 297 00:19:28,200 --> 00:19:30,000 Speaker 2: I went, it's a little musty. It's been there for years. 298 00:19:31,160 --> 00:19:33,840 Speaker 2: But I was like, oh my god, this is back 299 00:19:33,880 --> 00:19:36,879 Speaker 2: when it was super cool, Like this is so old 300 00:19:36,920 --> 00:19:41,760 Speaker 2: school but vs. Victoria's Secret PS. When I was young, 301 00:19:41,880 --> 00:19:46,240 Speaker 2: Victoria's Secret was super popular and then for decades it 302 00:19:46,359 --> 00:19:49,399 Speaker 2: was like like you couldn't wear it. It was like 303 00:19:49,600 --> 00:19:53,359 Speaker 2: not cool, and now it's totally cool with the kids again. 304 00:19:54,440 --> 00:19:58,520 Speaker 2: So my initials on brand, but it had a BS 305 00:19:58,560 --> 00:20:00,159 Speaker 2: on it, and I was like, oh, that's okay you 306 00:20:00,359 --> 00:20:02,240 Speaker 2: and I saved it, and so I was in there. 307 00:20:02,400 --> 00:20:06,160 Speaker 2: But anyway, collectively like nine two one zero, like old 308 00:20:06,160 --> 00:20:12,199 Speaker 2: school bubblegum teeth that had been ripped out, basically a 309 00:20:12,240 --> 00:20:16,959 Speaker 2: weed pen from the nineties and an old pair of 310 00:20:17,520 --> 00:20:23,199 Speaker 2: underwear creeped out. My kid, not gonna lie, not surprised, 311 00:20:24,160 --> 00:20:27,439 Speaker 2: and she wanted to dispose of all this and I 312 00:20:27,480 --> 00:20:29,560 Speaker 2: was like, nope, nope, we want to take a picture 313 00:20:29,600 --> 00:20:33,600 Speaker 2: of this content. I don't know what I'll do with 314 00:20:33,720 --> 00:20:46,440 Speaker 2: it all, but anyway, anyway, yes, and then there's Mother's Day. 315 00:20:46,520 --> 00:20:52,160 Speaker 2: This is my first single girl Mother's Day? What does 316 00:20:52,200 --> 00:20:54,919 Speaker 2: that mean? Like, I don't even know what that means? 317 00:20:55,240 --> 00:20:58,919 Speaker 2: And Stella, bless her heart, she was like, Mom, what 318 00:20:58,960 --> 00:21:01,000 Speaker 2: do you want to do for Mother's And I was like, 319 00:21:01,560 --> 00:21:04,760 Speaker 2: whatever you guys want. She's like, no, Mom, seriously, every 320 00:21:04,840 --> 00:21:07,560 Speaker 2: year you always say whatever we want, Like what do 321 00:21:07,800 --> 00:21:14,439 Speaker 2: you want? Take everybody out of the picture? What do 322 00:21:14,480 --> 00:21:18,400 Speaker 2: you like to do for fun? And I had no answer, 323 00:21:18,480 --> 00:21:23,720 Speaker 2: you guys? And that was that was startling because I 324 00:21:23,760 --> 00:21:27,199 Speaker 2: couldn't remember what I used to like to do for me. 325 00:21:29,000 --> 00:21:32,119 Speaker 2: I couldn't even think of it. I was like and 326 00:21:32,200 --> 00:21:37,920 Speaker 2: I kept saying, we wi we like sushi, and she's like, Mom, 327 00:21:38,440 --> 00:21:42,560 Speaker 2: you she was like, do you want to go get 328 00:21:42,560 --> 00:21:45,000 Speaker 2: a massage? And I was like no, no, no, no, it's 329 00:21:45,040 --> 00:21:48,280 Speaker 2: about you guys. She's like, no, Mom, it's not like 330 00:21:48,400 --> 00:21:51,800 Speaker 2: you do this every year like you plan and it's 331 00:21:51,880 --> 00:21:57,720 Speaker 2: about everybody else, Like what do you want? And I 332 00:21:57,760 --> 00:22:01,360 Speaker 2: couldn't remember what I like to do because it's been 333 00:22:01,480 --> 00:22:05,040 Speaker 2: so long that I've thought about doing something for me. 334 00:22:06,000 --> 00:22:10,159 Speaker 2: Ruth Anne, you knew me before I was married and 335 00:22:10,240 --> 00:22:12,240 Speaker 2: had kids. Do you remember what I used to like 336 00:22:12,320 --> 00:22:12,600 Speaker 2: to do? 337 00:22:13,280 --> 00:22:15,440 Speaker 1: You really did get a lot of joy out of 338 00:22:15,480 --> 00:22:20,720 Speaker 1: all of your DIY things that you made and cooking. 339 00:22:21,040 --> 00:22:24,560 Speaker 1: I can remember you having. Did you say cooking fun 340 00:22:24,840 --> 00:22:25,959 Speaker 1: baking and cooking? 341 00:22:26,040 --> 00:22:26,960 Speaker 2: Did you say hooking? 342 00:22:27,480 --> 00:22:28,720 Speaker 3: No, I say cooking. 343 00:22:29,359 --> 00:22:32,359 Speaker 2: Oh my god, you guys, I think I've gone deaf. 344 00:22:33,240 --> 00:22:36,520 Speaker 2: I've had kids screaming in my ear for a long time. 345 00:22:36,880 --> 00:22:39,440 Speaker 3: Yeah, I remember you having a really good time hooking 346 00:22:40,080 --> 00:22:44,480 Speaker 3: some boulevard about three o'clock in the morning. Those were 347 00:22:44,520 --> 00:22:45,119 Speaker 3: good times. 348 00:22:46,160 --> 00:22:50,080 Speaker 2: What do you mean, no, no cooking? I used to 349 00:22:50,080 --> 00:22:50,960 Speaker 2: hook rugs. 350 00:22:52,119 --> 00:22:56,399 Speaker 1: Oh sorry, I'm not as crafty as you are. No. 351 00:22:56,880 --> 00:22:59,080 Speaker 2: Jen taught me that, Like I can do a lot 352 00:22:59,080 --> 00:23:02,520 Speaker 2: of DIY. Jenny taught me. We would sit in her 353 00:23:02,520 --> 00:23:04,600 Speaker 2: house and she taught me how to hook a rug. 354 00:23:04,720 --> 00:23:06,679 Speaker 2: We went to she took me to Michael's for the 355 00:23:06,720 --> 00:23:12,359 Speaker 2: first time. But yeah, I remember I was so big 356 00:23:12,400 --> 00:23:16,720 Speaker 2: and dicopoge mm hm. Would you loved it? 357 00:23:16,760 --> 00:23:18,400 Speaker 3: And it was nice because it was stuff you did 358 00:23:18,400 --> 00:23:19,360 Speaker 3: with your kids. 359 00:23:20,359 --> 00:23:22,600 Speaker 2: So stop bringing them into this. 360 00:23:22,880 --> 00:23:26,880 Speaker 3: Why they's supposed to be sort of for both of you. 361 00:23:26,960 --> 00:23:28,720 Speaker 3: It's the kids celebrating their mom. 362 00:23:29,280 --> 00:23:35,000 Speaker 2: No, okay, interesting, there's two schools of thought. There's some 363 00:23:35,240 --> 00:23:38,920 Speaker 2: moms that literally are like, you know what, I'm in 364 00:23:38,960 --> 00:23:43,600 Speaker 2: this twenty four to seven every day. It's always about you, guys. 365 00:23:44,160 --> 00:23:47,520 Speaker 2: So this is my one day and I want the 366 00:23:47,600 --> 00:23:51,399 Speaker 2: day off. Lorraine, what type of mom? They're both like, 367 00:23:51,720 --> 00:23:54,680 Speaker 2: it's fair, both types of moms like do you want 368 00:23:54,680 --> 00:23:56,480 Speaker 2: to do what the kids want to do and spend 369 00:23:56,480 --> 00:23:59,320 Speaker 2: the day with them, or do you want, like, I'd 370 00:23:59,359 --> 00:24:02,280 Speaker 2: love to have some peace and quiet and do something 371 00:24:02,320 --> 00:24:02,560 Speaker 2: for me. 372 00:24:03,400 --> 00:24:05,920 Speaker 4: I want to be this spaw mom, but I I'll 373 00:24:05,960 --> 00:24:08,639 Speaker 4: never be this spaw mom because of my guilt that 374 00:24:08,720 --> 00:24:11,280 Speaker 4: I have no idea why I have. But yes, every 375 00:24:11,359 --> 00:24:13,400 Speaker 4: day for them, even when it's Mother's Day. 376 00:24:13,640 --> 00:24:20,879 Speaker 2: Unfortunately fair and my sentiment is exactly I want to 377 00:24:20,960 --> 00:24:24,080 Speaker 2: be that spa mom, which you guys, you know what. 378 00:24:25,280 --> 00:24:28,439 Speaker 2: The spot doesn't work for me. I just everyone's like, 379 00:24:28,440 --> 00:24:33,680 Speaker 2: go get a massage. Speaking of guilt, I can't get 380 00:24:33,720 --> 00:24:40,200 Speaker 2: a massage because I'm so worried the entire time like, oh, 381 00:24:40,680 --> 00:24:43,879 Speaker 2: they're working on me, they're doing something for me. What 382 00:24:44,040 --> 00:24:47,639 Speaker 2: about them? So I engage and ask about their lives 383 00:24:47,760 --> 00:24:50,159 Speaker 2: and then you guys know, like, it's not even about me. 384 00:24:50,280 --> 00:24:56,440 Speaker 2: I'm just this human like energy wise. People end up 385 00:24:56,520 --> 00:25:03,840 Speaker 2: just like about that sounded dirty about their lives, and 386 00:25:04,280 --> 00:25:07,600 Speaker 2: I embrace it and I end up giving them advice 387 00:25:07,760 --> 00:25:10,280 Speaker 2: and being like, oh my gosh. And then what happened? 388 00:25:10,720 --> 00:25:16,280 Speaker 2: And I've had one missus say oh my god, I've 389 00:25:16,280 --> 00:25:18,719 Speaker 2: been doing this for so long, and she as she's crying, 390 00:25:19,040 --> 00:25:22,080 Speaker 2: and she goes, that's a part. She brought up something 391 00:25:22,200 --> 00:25:25,920 Speaker 2: very emotional that she had repressed, and she said, I'm 392 00:25:25,920 --> 00:25:27,439 Speaker 2: so sorry. I have to take a moment. I am 393 00:25:28,040 --> 00:25:33,320 Speaker 2: embarrassed telling you this. And I promptly sat up and 394 00:25:33,680 --> 00:25:35,720 Speaker 2: hugged her and said don't oh my god, don't worry. 395 00:25:35,760 --> 00:25:38,760 Speaker 2: It's safe with me, and like, but I'm that human 396 00:25:39,520 --> 00:25:42,440 Speaker 2: that I'm just like, oh my gosh, it's so quiet. 397 00:25:42,920 --> 00:25:46,200 Speaker 2: And then I've had friends be like no, no, no, 398 00:25:46,520 --> 00:25:48,840 Speaker 2: you can't do that. So when you start a massage, 399 00:25:49,640 --> 00:25:52,920 Speaker 2: you don't you say thank you. You're gracious, and you're like, Okay, 400 00:25:53,040 --> 00:25:55,119 Speaker 2: I've had a hard week. I'm just going to be quiet, 401 00:25:55,160 --> 00:25:57,360 Speaker 2: and I'm like, okay, well I can't say that and 402 00:25:57,600 --> 00:26:02,119 Speaker 2: don't engage. You know, you're paying them, you're here, like 403 00:26:02,280 --> 00:26:07,840 Speaker 2: they're here and they want to do this, and don't engage. 404 00:26:07,960 --> 00:26:11,320 Speaker 2: So then when I don't engage and don't talk to them, 405 00:26:11,560 --> 00:26:14,040 Speaker 2: I sit in my head for like an hour being like, 406 00:26:14,760 --> 00:26:17,800 Speaker 2: oh my god, is she okay? Or and I don't 407 00:26:18,160 --> 00:26:24,760 Speaker 2: like men touching me during a paid massage, so I yeah, 408 00:26:24,840 --> 00:26:27,439 Speaker 2: I'm just like, oh god, I feel so bad. And 409 00:26:27,480 --> 00:26:29,960 Speaker 2: then I start to like go weird places like oh 410 00:26:30,040 --> 00:26:32,719 Speaker 2: my god, I feel so bad, like at least it's me, 411 00:26:33,080 --> 00:26:37,359 Speaker 2: Like imagine like men she has to deal with and 412 00:26:37,400 --> 00:26:41,000 Speaker 2: they're hairy and gross and like that type of human. 413 00:26:41,200 --> 00:26:45,240 Speaker 2: Like yeah, I go all kinds of crazy places. But 414 00:26:45,400 --> 00:26:48,919 Speaker 2: I sit there for an hour, just like tense, and 415 00:26:48,920 --> 00:26:54,119 Speaker 2: then afterwards like are you relaxed, And I'm like absolutely, 416 00:26:55,520 --> 00:26:58,320 Speaker 2: but I'm not anyway, Spa da mom. 417 00:26:59,400 --> 00:27:02,359 Speaker 3: Anybody gives you a guest certificate for a massage, feel 418 00:27:02,359 --> 00:27:05,880 Speaker 3: free to pass it my way. I can relax during 419 00:27:05,880 --> 00:27:09,480 Speaker 3: a massage, really yeah. I not feel the urge to 420 00:27:09,560 --> 00:27:12,040 Speaker 3: talk or think about the massage therapist. 421 00:27:13,000 --> 00:27:17,640 Speaker 2: Okay, wait, have you my friend? And I just had 422 00:27:17,880 --> 00:27:21,280 Speaker 2: this combo the other day about happy endings. Oh god, 423 00:27:21,880 --> 00:27:26,439 Speaker 2: oh too much for this podcast. Sorry my bad. No 424 00:27:26,480 --> 00:27:33,920 Speaker 2: one ever. We were talking about happy endings and it 425 00:27:33,960 --> 00:27:38,320 Speaker 2: was like, wow, this is a male and I were 426 00:27:38,359 --> 00:27:42,440 Speaker 2: talking about this, so I was curious, how do men 427 00:27:42,560 --> 00:27:46,520 Speaker 2: feel about it? And he was saying like not as 428 00:27:46,640 --> 00:27:50,880 Speaker 2: jam like could never even would not be okay with it. 429 00:27:51,080 --> 00:27:54,520 Speaker 2: But you know, clearly, you know, there's a lot of 430 00:27:54,560 --> 00:27:58,680 Speaker 2: my male friends are like, oh, yeah, that's a thing. 431 00:27:59,280 --> 00:28:03,199 Speaker 2: And I'm like, oh, that's so weird. And then he 432 00:28:03,359 --> 00:28:07,000 Speaker 2: posts the question to me, does this ever happen these 433 00:28:07,040 --> 00:28:11,640 Speaker 2: happy ending places with a woman? Like do they ever 434 00:28:11,720 --> 00:28:15,160 Speaker 2: give happy endings to a female or is it just males? 435 00:28:15,720 --> 00:28:17,800 Speaker 2: And I was like, I don't know, I don't know. 436 00:28:18,240 --> 00:28:19,919 Speaker 3: Definitely not at Burke Williams. 437 00:28:20,280 --> 00:28:24,360 Speaker 2: Burke Williams. Oh you go to fancy places now. 438 00:28:24,560 --> 00:28:26,879 Speaker 3: Burke Williams was like, in the nineties. 439 00:28:26,600 --> 00:28:32,960 Speaker 2: You pretended to work out at Crunch? Cool, right, yep? No. 440 00:28:33,359 --> 00:28:37,000 Speaker 2: I remember that I had a boyfriend then and he 441 00:28:37,280 --> 00:28:40,800 Speaker 2: loved Burke Williams. So we would like go to Crunch 442 00:28:40,840 --> 00:28:43,560 Speaker 2: and he'd work out and I'd like pretend to. 443 00:28:43,560 --> 00:28:49,160 Speaker 5: Do the zoom book class or whatever boot camp, and 444 00:28:49,320 --> 00:28:52,680 Speaker 5: it would be so embarrassing because they have like glass 445 00:28:53,040 --> 00:28:57,120 Speaker 5: like glass so like everybody. 446 00:28:56,320 --> 00:29:01,000 Speaker 2: Can see correct. And at Crunch in La it's on 447 00:29:01,080 --> 00:29:05,959 Speaker 2: Sunset Boulevard and they would always I'm not even kidding, 448 00:29:06,840 --> 00:29:10,440 Speaker 2: it would be like thirty people in there, and they'd 449 00:29:10,480 --> 00:29:12,840 Speaker 2: have on their headset and they'd be calling to you 450 00:29:12,920 --> 00:29:16,240 Speaker 2: to encourage you. They'd always call me out and I'd 451 00:29:16,240 --> 00:29:20,240 Speaker 2: be like, what is happening. They'd be like Toy, and 452 00:29:20,280 --> 00:29:22,800 Speaker 2: I'd be like, first of all, you know, I hate 453 00:29:22,840 --> 00:29:26,800 Speaker 2: my name said like toy, but then like I don't know. 454 00:29:27,360 --> 00:29:30,280 Speaker 2: It was yeah, it was late nineties. 455 00:29:31,040 --> 00:29:34,120 Speaker 3: Out to say you've got the steps. 456 00:29:33,720 --> 00:29:37,240 Speaker 2: For on or duh, yeah, you know I don't work out. 457 00:29:37,240 --> 00:29:40,000 Speaker 2: I don't do that shit. And I was probably gossip 458 00:29:40,080 --> 00:29:41,720 Speaker 2: being and like talking to my friend. I've been that 459 00:29:41,720 --> 00:29:49,480 Speaker 2: way since like high school anyway, chatty Kathy. But yeah, 460 00:29:49,520 --> 00:29:52,600 Speaker 2: I'd be like it'd be like Toy. I'm like, uh 461 00:29:52,640 --> 00:29:59,760 Speaker 2: huh it was like and they'd be like okay, oh Toy, No, 462 00:30:00,080 --> 00:30:03,120 Speaker 2: I'll be over in a second. I'd be like so shamed. 463 00:30:03,320 --> 00:30:06,880 Speaker 2: I literally one time it was this boot camp class 464 00:30:07,360 --> 00:30:10,560 Speaker 2: and the instructor had called me out three times and 465 00:30:10,760 --> 00:30:14,600 Speaker 2: I literally waited till she was like helping somebody else 466 00:30:15,080 --> 00:30:19,080 Speaker 2: in the corner, and I slipped out and slip out 467 00:30:19,200 --> 00:30:24,600 Speaker 2: a fucking ran I was like. And then from the 468 00:30:24,640 --> 00:30:29,719 Speaker 2: back she was like, you finally got it right. I 469 00:30:29,760 --> 00:30:33,560 Speaker 2: was like, bye, But I liked the little holes in 470 00:30:33,600 --> 00:30:36,440 Speaker 2: the wall, like the little places that are like in 471 00:30:36,480 --> 00:30:37,240 Speaker 2: a strip. 472 00:30:37,000 --> 00:30:39,880 Speaker 3: Mall where you will get a happy ending. 473 00:30:41,000 --> 00:30:43,280 Speaker 2: No, I don't want a happy ending, like if I 474 00:30:43,320 --> 00:30:46,960 Speaker 2: feel guilt with them, just like massaging my arm and leg. 475 00:30:47,520 --> 00:30:50,160 Speaker 2: Imagine the guilt I would feel if they were like 476 00:30:50,240 --> 00:30:53,720 Speaker 2: trying to like stroke my lady parts. Do you stroke 477 00:30:53,840 --> 00:31:00,800 Speaker 2: lady parts? If they were too oh my god, jggle 478 00:31:00,880 --> 00:31:04,520 Speaker 2: it just a little bit, not a little bit, a 479 00:31:04,560 --> 00:31:08,680 Speaker 2: lot and you gotta go fast. But whole other story, Yeah, 480 00:31:08,760 --> 00:31:13,000 Speaker 2: I would never be comfortable. But on rare occasion they 481 00:31:13,040 --> 00:31:17,320 Speaker 2: would go near your like butt and like almost too 482 00:31:17,480 --> 00:31:20,800 Speaker 2: close to the thighs. Have you ever had that happen? 483 00:31:20,880 --> 00:31:25,120 Speaker 2: And I'm like Rosen, I was like oooh, But then 484 00:31:25,160 --> 00:31:26,880 Speaker 2: You're like, I don't want to make them feel bad. 485 00:31:26,960 --> 00:31:30,920 Speaker 2: Perhaps this they're getting knots out of muscles, and so 486 00:31:30,960 --> 00:31:34,320 Speaker 2: I don't want to freeze up. So I'd be like Relax, relax, 487 00:31:34,400 --> 00:31:38,360 Speaker 2: They're doing nothing wrong. This is part of the job. Okay, 488 00:31:39,120 --> 00:31:42,280 Speaker 2: but I was like, whoa kind of close? That's kind 489 00:31:42,280 --> 00:31:47,440 Speaker 2: of close anyway. I am curious if a female has 490 00:31:47,480 --> 00:31:49,240 Speaker 2: ever gotten happy ending. 491 00:31:50,360 --> 00:31:54,120 Speaker 3: All right, this Mother's Day and then your birthday? 492 00:31:54,360 --> 00:32:01,040 Speaker 2: Oh god, okay, so there's Mother's Day. Ella, of course, 493 00:32:01,880 --> 00:32:05,760 Speaker 2: leader of the pack. She was like, mom, what do 494 00:32:05,800 --> 00:32:08,440 Speaker 2: you want to do? I had nothing. I couldn't remember 495 00:32:08,480 --> 00:32:12,080 Speaker 2: what I like, which leads me back to what do 496 00:32:12,320 --> 00:32:15,800 Speaker 2: I like to do? I must have had hobbies before kids, 497 00:32:15,840 --> 00:32:18,320 Speaker 2: Like in my twenties, what did I like to do 498 00:32:19,080 --> 00:32:21,920 Speaker 2: besides shop and drink? What did I like to do? 499 00:32:22,640 --> 00:32:25,120 Speaker 2: And rescue dogs? What did I like to do? 500 00:32:25,800 --> 00:32:27,240 Speaker 3: I was going to say rescue dogs? 501 00:32:27,280 --> 00:32:30,120 Speaker 1: I remember you making jewelry. I can think it always 502 00:32:30,160 --> 00:32:33,760 Speaker 1: goes back to you being like super crafty and having 503 00:32:33,760 --> 00:32:38,160 Speaker 1: an amazing artistic imagination and plugging into that that made 504 00:32:38,160 --> 00:32:38,920 Speaker 1: you really happy. 505 00:32:39,640 --> 00:32:44,360 Speaker 2: Someone's like, you should get into pickleball. I love to 506 00:32:44,360 --> 00:32:47,920 Speaker 2: eat pickles. Pickles are a huge We do pickle tastings 507 00:32:47,960 --> 00:32:50,000 Speaker 2: in my house, like every two weeks, I'm not kidding, 508 00:32:50,040 --> 00:32:52,440 Speaker 2: a new kind of pickle comes out. We're on it, 509 00:32:52,840 --> 00:32:55,320 Speaker 2: and all my kids fall a suit. So if anyone 510 00:32:55,520 --> 00:32:58,640 Speaker 2: wants to send me anything, I would like pickles. 511 00:32:58,920 --> 00:33:00,560 Speaker 3: That's a great idea. 512 00:33:02,280 --> 00:33:08,440 Speaker 2: I should aim higher and caviar. Okay, anyway, what am 513 00:33:08,440 --> 00:33:10,720 Speaker 2: I gonna do? Here's what I told her. I said, 514 00:33:11,000 --> 00:33:13,040 Speaker 2: we used to love but it's still a wee thing. 515 00:33:13,120 --> 00:33:14,680 Speaker 2: But it's something I wanted to do. We haven't been 516 00:33:14,680 --> 00:33:17,960 Speaker 2: in a while because our lives have been chaos. I 517 00:33:18,000 --> 00:33:22,160 Speaker 2: wanted to go down to Little Tokyo and walk around, 518 00:33:22,840 --> 00:33:25,520 Speaker 2: and that's where I have often gotten a lot of 519 00:33:25,560 --> 00:33:31,800 Speaker 2: my inspiration. And I love the fashion district. And you 520 00:33:31,840 --> 00:33:35,000 Speaker 2: know what, I love revolving sushi down there. It's called Cora. 521 00:33:35,760 --> 00:33:39,600 Speaker 2: It's just so fun. Anyway, so do that. 522 00:33:39,600 --> 00:33:41,800 Speaker 3: That sounds like a great thing to do for Mother's Day. 523 00:33:42,240 --> 00:33:45,320 Speaker 2: So I love Oh you guys, I love dim sum. 524 00:33:45,880 --> 00:33:48,760 Speaker 1: Oh well well there you just come up with some 525 00:33:48,800 --> 00:33:52,360 Speaker 1: great ideas. Great great mother's day. 526 00:33:53,280 --> 00:33:58,760 Speaker 2: This podcast multi purpose. Okay, my birthday quickly, let's talk 527 00:33:58,800 --> 00:34:01,960 Speaker 2: about my birthday. You guys, you know I love green, 528 00:34:02,160 --> 00:34:06,520 Speaker 2: and green is the color. I'm a Taurus. I'm Tori. 529 00:34:06,600 --> 00:34:14,520 Speaker 2: I'm a Taurus. I love sushi. Oh we just see exactly. 530 00:34:14,680 --> 00:34:16,879 Speaker 2: I don't know what I love I'll find out I'm 531 00:34:16,960 --> 00:34:22,840 Speaker 2: learning about myself. Who knew me? Anyway? Yeah, so emerald 532 00:34:22,920 --> 00:34:26,560 Speaker 2: is my birthstone, which is not the reason I like green. 533 00:34:26,960 --> 00:34:30,880 Speaker 2: I just love green like Green's always been my jam. 534 00:34:31,640 --> 00:34:37,200 Speaker 2: Obviously I wear a lot of green. So anyway, So 535 00:34:37,280 --> 00:34:39,120 Speaker 2: what do you want to do for your birthday this year? 536 00:34:39,760 --> 00:34:44,640 Speaker 2: Having it be your first birthday as a single woman? Okay, 537 00:34:44,880 --> 00:34:48,799 Speaker 2: so the last two years, this is a fact, I 538 00:34:48,960 --> 00:34:52,640 Speaker 2: have been sick on my birthday. I had bronchitis on 539 00:34:52,680 --> 00:34:56,520 Speaker 2: my forty ninth birthday. Literally stayed in bed. They brought 540 00:34:56,520 --> 00:34:59,200 Speaker 2: the cake into me. I was like, one eye open, 541 00:35:00,040 --> 00:35:06,000 Speaker 2: which one works better with my botox? None? Okay? They 542 00:35:07,080 --> 00:35:12,280 Speaker 2: brought the cake in. I was like so sick. Okay, 543 00:35:12,400 --> 00:35:16,439 Speaker 2: got it? Missed my birthday. My fiftieth birthday, ruth An 544 00:35:16,560 --> 00:35:21,520 Speaker 2: was there. My mother threw a lovely she knows caviars 545 00:35:21,640 --> 00:35:25,600 Speaker 2: like Big Sam. Sorry when you grew up like I did, 546 00:35:25,600 --> 00:35:30,759 Speaker 2: like I was born eating caviar silver spoon. Oh, but 547 00:35:30,840 --> 00:35:34,520 Speaker 2: we got member, we got pearlized spoons. I still have 548 00:35:34,640 --> 00:35:39,560 Speaker 2: it me too, one of my purses. Remember to take 549 00:35:39,560 --> 00:35:42,839 Speaker 2: that out before I sell it, the purse, not the spoon. Mom. 550 00:35:42,880 --> 00:35:46,800 Speaker 2: I would never do that. I love that. But yeah, 551 00:35:47,040 --> 00:35:49,680 Speaker 2: so they had one in Paris. They opened up a 552 00:35:49,719 --> 00:35:54,840 Speaker 2: caviar restaurant bar here and lovely twenty person beautiful table 553 00:35:55,920 --> 00:36:02,760 Speaker 2: all my besties and you guys. Ironically was this massive, 554 00:36:03,480 --> 00:36:07,520 Speaker 2: big potato you guys, I'll send you a picture, you guys, 555 00:36:09,600 --> 00:36:15,680 Speaker 2: topped with the most heaping spoonful of caviar you've ever seen. 556 00:36:16,400 --> 00:36:20,680 Speaker 2: My other one of my other friends jokes, he was like, 557 00:36:20,840 --> 00:36:24,759 Speaker 2: oh my god, I don't even eat caviar or potatoes, 558 00:36:25,520 --> 00:36:28,439 Speaker 2: but when I'm being served a thousand dollars potato, I'm 559 00:36:28,480 --> 00:36:31,919 Speaker 2: going deep. WHOA. I don't know where I was going 560 00:36:31,960 --> 00:36:34,040 Speaker 2: with that one. Do you remember that? 561 00:36:34,160 --> 00:36:34,320 Speaker 5: I do? 562 00:36:35,680 --> 00:36:39,279 Speaker 2: And Hansen's my mom, Aw, this was so cute. So 563 00:36:39,440 --> 00:36:43,360 Speaker 2: Hansen's has been like my family since I was born. 564 00:36:43,480 --> 00:36:48,600 Speaker 2: My mom always every birthday Hanson's cake. She got individualized 565 00:36:48,680 --> 00:36:52,400 Speaker 2: Hanson's cakes for everybody to take home as the party 566 00:36:52,440 --> 00:36:54,959 Speaker 2: gets Hey, ruth Anne, what happened to your Hanson's cake? 567 00:36:55,520 --> 00:36:59,319 Speaker 1: My Hanson's cake ran into a few things somehow, I'm 568 00:36:59,360 --> 00:37:02,359 Speaker 1: not quite sure or how it ended up on my glasses. 569 00:37:03,360 --> 00:37:04,200 Speaker 3: In my purse. 570 00:37:04,960 --> 00:37:07,440 Speaker 2: Well, it ran into a few things, including your fingers 571 00:37:07,440 --> 00:37:09,560 Speaker 2: and hands. I heard all about this on the ride home. 572 00:37:09,640 --> 00:37:12,160 Speaker 2: I don't today just make you blush. 573 00:37:12,480 --> 00:37:15,360 Speaker 3: I don't think so, just hot. 574 00:37:17,800 --> 00:37:24,160 Speaker 2: Hot flash anyway. Yeah, but my point was it was 575 00:37:24,200 --> 00:37:28,160 Speaker 2: just my big birthday. Wearing green. Of course looked amazing, 576 00:37:29,120 --> 00:37:31,640 Speaker 2: but I was sick. It was right after we had 577 00:37:31,680 --> 00:37:37,080 Speaker 2: the mold poisoning and I was so sick. I was 578 00:37:37,080 --> 00:37:40,719 Speaker 2: on antibiotics. I may I drank through it, but I 579 00:37:41,719 --> 00:37:45,720 Speaker 2: literally I was so sick during that birthday. So fingers 580 00:37:45,719 --> 00:37:48,880 Speaker 2: crossed and put it out there my fifty first birthday, 581 00:37:49,520 --> 00:37:52,799 Speaker 2: I'm going to be well and I'm going to have 582 00:37:52,960 --> 00:37:58,080 Speaker 2: a bomb ass birthday. What are we doing? Nothing planned? 583 00:37:58,320 --> 00:38:00,839 Speaker 2: I know Everyone's like, what do you want to do? 584 00:38:01,200 --> 00:38:04,359 Speaker 2: And I'm like, I'm me, I don't know. I hate surprises. 585 00:38:04,440 --> 00:38:08,680 Speaker 2: You guys all know that. You know what. That's old me. 586 00:38:08,880 --> 00:38:12,360 Speaker 2: I don't hate surprises. Surprise me away. Oh god, I 587 00:38:12,360 --> 00:38:16,279 Speaker 2: don't know, but that's that's me. I'm more focused. And 588 00:38:16,400 --> 00:38:18,719 Speaker 2: Memorial Day week and I'm like, three day weekend, what 589 00:38:18,719 --> 00:38:21,360 Speaker 2: do I do for the kids. Oh, it's pool season. 590 00:38:21,880 --> 00:38:25,919 Speaker 3: Like, I don't know, We'll come up with something really 591 00:38:26,000 --> 00:38:26,920 Speaker 3: fun for your birthday. 592 00:38:27,600 --> 00:38:31,680 Speaker 2: Kids can be so manipulative, as you know. I always 593 00:38:32,120 --> 00:38:34,600 Speaker 2: started to see the way that for my kids. I 594 00:38:34,640 --> 00:38:38,560 Speaker 2: was like, Hey, so maybe my birthday or you know, 595 00:38:38,760 --> 00:38:40,800 Speaker 2: one night that week, I'm gonna go out with friends 596 00:38:40,840 --> 00:38:43,080 Speaker 2: and I'll have like a friend night and like go 597 00:38:43,160 --> 00:38:47,040 Speaker 2: and do adult things and you know, go have drinks 598 00:38:47,080 --> 00:38:50,640 Speaker 2: and go, you know, like ad night out. And Stella 599 00:38:50,719 --> 00:38:53,040 Speaker 2: was like, you're not going to spend your birthday with us? 600 00:38:53,160 --> 00:38:56,600 Speaker 2: And I was like oh oh, And I was like 601 00:38:57,040 --> 00:38:59,839 Speaker 2: I tried to like justify it as moms do you think? 602 00:39:00,200 --> 00:39:03,560 Speaker 2: And You're like, well, it's a school night, so why 603 00:39:03,560 --> 00:39:06,000 Speaker 2: don't I go out that night and have like my 604 00:39:06,160 --> 00:39:09,480 Speaker 2: fun night out with my friends? And then I was like, baby, 605 00:39:09,560 --> 00:39:12,360 Speaker 2: it's all fun with you guys. And then that weekend 606 00:39:12,600 --> 00:39:17,120 Speaker 2: we'll have a weekend where we're all together. And she's like, okay, 607 00:39:17,239 --> 00:39:20,520 Speaker 2: if that's what you want, I was like, oh, that's 608 00:39:20,560 --> 00:39:24,799 Speaker 2: what I want. Like crap, this sucks, Like what are 609 00:39:24,800 --> 00:39:28,520 Speaker 2: we supposed to do? Like, okay on my birthday? You know, 610 00:39:30,160 --> 00:39:34,560 Speaker 2: this is my next chapter, Like I'm like doing me. Now, 611 00:39:35,120 --> 00:39:36,680 Speaker 2: what am I supposed to do? Like go out with 612 00:39:36,760 --> 00:39:41,120 Speaker 2: my five kids at six o'clock early bird special Chili's cool. 613 00:39:41,640 --> 00:39:44,160 Speaker 2: You guys will all be on the swipe the pad like, oh, 614 00:39:44,440 --> 00:39:46,960 Speaker 2: plant versus zombies, Like, no one will look at me. 615 00:39:47,360 --> 00:39:52,320 Speaker 2: I'll sit there sipping on my sake soke wishful thinking 616 00:39:53,040 --> 00:39:56,560 Speaker 2: Chili's ough. Great, I'll have to have the Sharennkes. They 617 00:39:56,560 --> 00:39:59,760 Speaker 2: don't even have a pinot Grisia. Fuck my life anyway. 618 00:40:00,360 --> 00:40:02,920 Speaker 3: I have the perfect solution. 619 00:40:04,000 --> 00:40:08,239 Speaker 1: Yes, go to one of those places in those minimals 620 00:40:08,680 --> 00:40:11,720 Speaker 1: and get yourself a happy ending for your birthday. 621 00:40:11,840 --> 00:40:17,680 Speaker 2: Ew no, thank you, No, I don't want that. How 622 00:40:17,719 --> 00:40:21,520 Speaker 2: do you guys feel? Sorry, I'm my tangent. How do 623 00:40:21,560 --> 00:40:25,440 Speaker 2: you guys feel about the new terminology body count? 624 00:40:25,719 --> 00:40:28,600 Speaker 3: I don't know what that is? Wait, what's that? 625 00:40:32,160 --> 00:40:36,000 Speaker 2: I heard this from the teens. Ps. All my teens 626 00:40:36,040 --> 00:40:40,560 Speaker 2: are super like not into this, Like they're very like 627 00:40:40,800 --> 00:40:48,640 Speaker 2: Donna Martin's good for them happy. But there's a thing 628 00:40:49,080 --> 00:40:54,279 Speaker 2: that the teens that aren't virgins say like, oh yeah, 629 00:40:54,400 --> 00:40:57,440 Speaker 2: my body count. Literally I heard body count. It was 630 00:40:57,480 --> 00:40:59,719 Speaker 2: like serial killer. I was like, how many bodies have 631 00:40:59,760 --> 00:41:01,680 Speaker 2: you been? I don't know how many people had you killed? 632 00:41:01,680 --> 00:41:05,560 Speaker 2: What the hell? And Stella was like, no, mom, you 633 00:41:05,680 --> 00:41:09,320 Speaker 2: know what that means? Like you're so uncool, like everyone 634 00:41:09,360 --> 00:41:12,879 Speaker 2: says it. It's how many people you've slept with, it's 635 00:41:12,920 --> 00:41:16,880 Speaker 2: your body count, oh dow. Yeah, we used to just 636 00:41:17,000 --> 00:41:19,880 Speaker 2: keep a list, like on paper. 637 00:41:20,360 --> 00:41:22,799 Speaker 3: I don't even want what we did. 638 00:41:23,280 --> 00:41:25,759 Speaker 1: I don't know whatever happened to that list, which is 639 00:41:25,760 --> 00:41:26,560 Speaker 1: a little frightening. 640 00:41:27,040 --> 00:41:31,000 Speaker 2: So I was that girl that was like a numbers girl, 641 00:41:31,239 --> 00:41:34,799 Speaker 2: and I was like, I lose my virginity till I 642 00:41:34,880 --> 00:41:39,360 Speaker 2: was over eighteen. And it's like getting my earspurs, like 643 00:41:39,440 --> 00:41:41,840 Speaker 2: I'm not you know, didn't do it till I was eighteen, 644 00:41:41,960 --> 00:41:45,440 Speaker 2: not going to do it till I'm forty. So I cried, 645 00:41:45,640 --> 00:41:48,919 Speaker 2: you guys, I bawled my eyes out when I went 646 00:41:49,160 --> 00:41:51,919 Speaker 2: over one hand, and I'm talking about the number five 647 00:41:52,400 --> 00:41:55,600 Speaker 2: when I had slept with more than five people. I 648 00:41:55,920 --> 00:42:00,360 Speaker 2: cried so hard and was like internally beating myself up 649 00:42:00,480 --> 00:42:03,560 Speaker 2: like I am a whore, Oh my god. And I 650 00:42:03,640 --> 00:42:06,560 Speaker 2: wasn't young. It was spread out through the years, like 651 00:42:06,840 --> 00:42:10,759 Speaker 2: well into my way into my twenties five, and I 652 00:42:10,800 --> 00:42:14,400 Speaker 2: was like, oh my god, I have had another hand. 653 00:42:14,800 --> 00:42:20,959 Speaker 2: And I was so sad. Now granted, you know men, 654 00:42:21,239 --> 00:42:23,839 Speaker 2: you know, it's like another notch for my belt. Wait, 655 00:42:23,840 --> 00:42:26,120 Speaker 2: what do they say? Now? I'm sure that's not cool anymore. 656 00:42:26,680 --> 00:42:29,520 Speaker 2: Like whatever, like men can sleep. They want to like 657 00:42:29,680 --> 00:42:33,880 Speaker 2: up the number like hundreds, you know, and you're like ooh. 658 00:42:33,920 --> 00:42:37,799 Speaker 2: Like girls, I feel like we are just like oh no, 659 00:42:37,840 --> 00:42:40,200 Speaker 2: we want the number low. But I hear that's not 660 00:42:40,280 --> 00:42:44,360 Speaker 2: the new generation then, you know, because women are empowered. 661 00:42:44,360 --> 00:42:47,840 Speaker 2: They're like, well you know that's and they're like proud 662 00:42:47,880 --> 00:42:51,160 Speaker 2: of their body count. I'm like, uh uh, I can't 663 00:42:51,160 --> 00:42:54,960 Speaker 2: invest in that, Like why was I talking about this anyway? 664 00:42:55,160 --> 00:42:57,719 Speaker 2: I don't want a happy ending? What else? What else 665 00:42:57,760 --> 00:43:00,319 Speaker 2: can I do for my birthday? I do you guys? 666 00:43:00,320 --> 00:43:00,680 Speaker 5: You know what? 667 00:43:00,840 --> 00:43:02,279 Speaker 2: You know what the truth is. I do want a 668 00:43:02,280 --> 00:43:05,040 Speaker 2: happy ending, and it doesn't involve sex. It doesn't involve 669 00:43:05,160 --> 00:43:09,759 Speaker 2: anything physical. I want my happy ending. I'm not like, 670 00:43:10,280 --> 00:43:13,080 Speaker 2: here's the thing about me. I feel like I never 671 00:43:13,360 --> 00:43:18,080 Speaker 2: am jaded and there's always that like light inside of me. Yeah, 672 00:43:18,239 --> 00:43:21,920 Speaker 2: Jenny calls me Paulianna. She's like, Okay, this positivity, but 673 00:43:22,200 --> 00:43:26,000 Speaker 2: it's a fact, like I can find hope in anything 674 00:43:26,000 --> 00:43:28,600 Speaker 2: and I never get discouraged. And I call it. You 675 00:43:28,640 --> 00:43:30,879 Speaker 2: know a lot of people, I feel like people put 676 00:43:30,920 --> 00:43:36,040 Speaker 2: your fire out. And Dean said something that actually resonated 677 00:43:36,200 --> 00:43:40,680 Speaker 2: in an article. He said he saw my light dim 678 00:43:40,960 --> 00:43:43,279 Speaker 2: that final fight we had before we split up and 679 00:43:43,320 --> 00:43:46,680 Speaker 2: separate it, and I was like, I had to think 680 00:43:46,719 --> 00:43:49,760 Speaker 2: about that one. I was like, wow, he did. Yeah, 681 00:43:49,800 --> 00:43:54,279 Speaker 2: it flickered, it dimmed a little, but it's not going 682 00:43:54,360 --> 00:43:59,040 Speaker 2: out like It's like, I feel like my flame is 683 00:43:59,080 --> 00:44:04,880 Speaker 2: burning brighter than ever inside, and so yeah, I do 684 00:44:05,080 --> 00:44:09,280 Speaker 2: deserve that happy ending. I'm getting there and I'm hopeful 685 00:44:09,800 --> 00:44:14,120 Speaker 2: and I'm going to make it happen. Light it up, bitch,