WEBVTT - Shrek the Third 0:00:00.960 --> 0:00:03.760 On the Beck dol Cast, the questions asked if movies 0:00:03.840 --> 0:00:07.480 have women in them, are all their discussions just boyfriends 0:00:07.480 --> 0:00:11.680 and husbands, or do they have individualism the patriarchy? Zef 0:00:11.800 --> 0:00:15.880 in best start changing it with the Beck del Cast. 0:00:17.440 --> 0:00:23.960 Welcome to the Wow Wow Happy New Year, Caitlin, Happy 0:00:23.960 --> 0:00:27.920 New Year to you, Jamie. We are in good sorts. 0:00:28.240 --> 0:00:30.800 As you can tell, We're in good we're in good starts, 0:00:30.800 --> 0:00:35.280 we're in high spirits, and we're covering Shrek three. I 0:00:35.280 --> 0:00:38.120 feel like we like to bring in the new year, 0:00:38.680 --> 0:00:40.960 you know, just kind of like on a good on 0:00:41.000 --> 0:00:43.920 a good vibe. We want to give people something that 0:00:44.000 --> 0:00:47.440 they're like familiar with, something that makes them smile, but 0:00:47.600 --> 0:00:51.320 also something that makes them think exactly. We want to 0:00:51.360 --> 0:00:54.000 set a precedent, and what better way to set a 0:00:54.040 --> 0:00:59.280 precedent for than with Shrek the Third. Yeah, this is 0:00:59.320 --> 0:01:06.400 a very cerebral podcast, and you can tell because of 0:01:06.720 --> 0:01:10.200 our s tier movie selection. I was being driven home 0:01:10.200 --> 0:01:11.880 by a friend last night because I don't have a 0:01:11.959 --> 0:01:16.759 driver's license, and I was thank you so much. I 0:01:16.800 --> 0:01:20.120 was mortified at how many times in the space of 0:01:20.160 --> 0:01:23.560 one conversation I said, well, that would require reading a 0:01:23.560 --> 0:01:26.960 book and I'm just not going to do that. Um, 0:01:27.440 --> 0:01:30.479 we famously don't read books, so we don't read books. 0:01:30.520 --> 0:01:34.720 But this is ultimately an intellectual endeavor and we're trying 0:01:34.720 --> 0:01:38.920 to change hearts and minds. Um, Happy New Year, h 0:01:39.040 --> 0:01:43.920 n y as it were? Oh my gosh, yeah, Um ditto, 0:01:44.520 --> 0:01:50.160 right back at you. Cute. Okay, we're using phrases this year. 0:01:50.160 --> 0:01:51.680 I don't know what I'm trying to say. Welcome to 0:01:51.720 --> 0:01:54.040 the Betel Cast. My name is Jamie Loft Tech, my 0:01:54.120 --> 0:01:57.240 name is Caitlin Darante, and this is our show where 0:01:57.240 --> 0:02:01.040 we examine movies through an intersectional feminist end, using the 0:02:01.160 --> 0:02:03.800 Becktel test simply as a jumping off point to initiate 0:02:03.840 --> 0:02:09.079 a much larger conversation about representation and such. Of Justin 0:02:09.120 --> 0:02:14.880 Timberlake in animation, God, I feel like this was the 0:02:14.960 --> 0:02:18.400 justin Timberlake stunt casting era, and he really was giving 0:02:18.440 --> 0:02:24.160 it a hard in this movie. He is stinky, stinky, stinky. 0:02:24.280 --> 0:02:27.000 And that's an example of a conversation that would not 0:02:27.040 --> 0:02:29.359 pass the Becktel test. Can I tell you what it is? 0:02:29.600 --> 0:02:32.720 Please do. It's a media metric created by queer cartoonist 0:02:32.720 --> 0:02:36.799 Alice and Bechtels, sometimes called the becktel Wallace test. Originally, 0:02:37.200 --> 0:02:40.680 it was created as a one off, jokey kind of 0:02:40.720 --> 0:02:46.760 metric in her iconic comic Wow Okay, her iconic comics 0:02:47.080 --> 0:02:54.960 comic Maybe Tania I Frankenstein I Robot, And now the 0:02:55.080 --> 0:03:01.519 juices are kind of flowing right okay, okay, am I awake. 0:03:02.120 --> 0:03:05.680 It started as a bit uh in in her iconic 0:03:05.720 --> 0:03:08.640 comic Dikes to Watch out for highly recommended, but it's 0:03:08.639 --> 0:03:11.919 since become a kind of commonly accepted metric. Uh. There's 0:03:11.919 --> 0:03:13.520 a lot of different versions of it. The one we 0:03:13.600 --> 0:03:17.120 use requires that there are two characters with names of 0:03:17.120 --> 0:03:20.120 a marginalized gender that speak to each other about something 0:03:20.200 --> 0:03:23.600 other than a man for more than two lines of dialogue, 0:03:23.800 --> 0:03:28.400 ideally an impactful few lines of dialogue. This movie, I 0:03:28.440 --> 0:03:31.200 was frustrated with how they did it, but they did. 0:03:31.880 --> 0:03:35.520 They did do it. It was mostly women negging each 0:03:35.560 --> 0:03:39.800 other at a baby shower, but they did technically do it, 0:03:39.880 --> 0:03:44.600 and then each other in a dark corridor, which is 0:03:44.640 --> 0:03:47.960 actually where I would feel more at home. Is good. 0:03:48.240 --> 0:03:50.640 I'm no stranger to getting negged in a dark corridor. 0:03:53.640 --> 0:03:55.880 You do stand up long enough that will happen? Do 0:03:55.920 --> 0:03:58.520 you actually? Kind of like on a constant basis, and 0:03:58.560 --> 0:04:03.560 it maybe happened to me yesterday. Oh no, last night 0:04:04.120 --> 0:04:11.560 I failed to win a dollar gift card to Red Robin. 0:04:11.840 --> 0:04:13.960 Oh my gosh, I had a stand up comedy show. 0:04:14.040 --> 0:04:16.359 I'm so sorry. You have what it took? You know 0:04:16.400 --> 0:04:20.240 who won? Who? The pianist? None of the stand ups one? 0:04:20.400 --> 0:04:24.000 What not fair? Yeah, the crowd really liked the pianist 0:04:24.440 --> 0:04:30.560 and well, um, not to completely blow up your spot, Jamie, 0:04:30.560 --> 0:04:34.200 but yes, someone was gifted a little something from a 0:04:34.400 --> 0:04:39.200 certain other someone. Are you shouting out your Christmas gift 0:04:39.200 --> 0:04:44.320 to me? Yeah? Because plugging your gif. I'm plugging the 0:04:45.640 --> 0:04:48.880 Olive Garden gift card that I bestowed upon you. It's 0:04:48.920 --> 0:04:52.039 true for xmus it's true and we and I'm going 0:04:52.120 --> 0:04:55.359 to use it on you with you. I cannot wait. 0:04:55.600 --> 0:05:00.800 Oh my god, I'm thrilled. I'm thrilled. Thing, I'm crying. 0:05:01.240 --> 0:05:04.839 I'm ready to discuss Shrek the third, Shrek rate Okay, 0:05:04.880 --> 0:05:08.400 what's your history? Sorry, Shrek the third, Shrek the third, 0:05:08.520 --> 0:05:10.800 get it right? And that was fine? It was funked 0:05:10.880 --> 0:05:13.960 up with me. I'm sorry. I mean Shrek the third, 0:05:14.000 --> 0:05:16.320 What can I say? I mean they if you if 0:05:16.360 --> 0:05:20.000 this is the first episode. You're listening two of this show. 0:05:20.080 --> 0:05:23.280 That's very funny. I guess you know. I would say 0:05:23.279 --> 0:05:26.120 I am a Shrek head. I think I would have 0:05:26.120 --> 0:05:28.320 seen this in theaters. I think this would have been 0:05:28.440 --> 0:05:32.440 I didn't start seeing the Shrek movies in theaters until 0:05:32.920 --> 0:05:36.279 it was like as a joke. If I remember correctly, 0:05:36.480 --> 0:05:38.440 I would have seen the first two on like home 0:05:38.680 --> 0:05:42.160 video under dress with some cousins, I think, And then 0:05:42.839 --> 0:05:44.640 you know, this one I would have maybe seen in theaters. 0:05:44.680 --> 0:05:49.240 The fourth one I strongly remember seeing in theaters because 0:05:49.320 --> 0:05:52.599 I believe that I let my high school boyfriend finger 0:05:52.680 --> 0:05:56.880 me at the fourth one. Um, but that was in 0:05:57.000 --> 0:05:59.960 two thousand and ten and I was not quite an adult. 0:06:00.040 --> 0:06:02.359 I was still a child getting fingered at the movies. 0:06:02.400 --> 0:06:07.840 But uh, well it was by another child, so it's okay, 0:06:09.279 --> 0:06:13.000 Am I awake? UM, I would have seen this in theaters. 0:06:13.240 --> 0:06:17.200 I will say that this is my least favorite Shrek. 0:06:17.360 --> 0:06:21.000 I am a I feel intimately linked with this franchise 0:06:21.040 --> 0:06:24.120 for many years now. UM, I've given my body too. 0:06:24.160 --> 0:06:27.560 It's also cannon to the show we are. The Bechtel 0:06:27.600 --> 0:06:32.160 cast is synonymous with Shrek. It's there's no way around it. 0:06:32.160 --> 0:06:34.560 It's true. The first time I went viral and my 0:06:34.600 --> 0:06:39.560 whole life was Shrek related, like it's all connected. I 0:06:39.640 --> 0:06:42.400 went to Actually I was thinking about this because I 0:06:42.440 --> 0:06:44.239 went back and looked at some of my notes because 0:06:44.600 --> 0:06:49.000 at the end of I was really depressed. And you 0:06:49.120 --> 0:06:52.359 will understand why I did this when I tell you 0:06:52.400 --> 0:06:54.760 I was very depressed. I went to a ten hour 0:06:54.920 --> 0:07:01.280 long zoom in conference on Shrek and there were a 0:07:01.279 --> 0:07:04.159 lot of different speakers. There was a lot there was 0:07:04.200 --> 0:07:07.440 actually kind of like a lot of good ship, not 0:07:07.480 --> 0:07:09.880 to you know, send you into a panic, but I 0:07:09.960 --> 0:07:13.960 learned a lot. And Shrek three not a heavily discussed 0:07:13.960 --> 0:07:16.000 shruck because I feel like it wasn't well reviewed and 0:07:16.040 --> 0:07:18.920 it isn't very beloved in spite of almost making a 0:07:19.000 --> 0:07:23.760 billion dollars but eight d and thirteen million at the 0:07:23.800 --> 0:07:28.920 box office kind of absurd. But there was talk of, like, 0:07:29.280 --> 0:07:32.480 you know, a lot of feminist discussion about Fiona and 0:07:32.520 --> 0:07:35.160 Shrek three does come up quite a bit because of 0:07:35.360 --> 0:07:38.720 how she is, um she is mommy in this one. 0:07:38.800 --> 0:07:43.800 She's mommy fied, she's mommy pilled, and yeah, it's just 0:07:43.880 --> 0:07:46.680 like it's honestly in my least favorite Trek I feel 0:07:46.720 --> 0:07:49.920 like all the characters are underused, and I feel like, 0:07:50.720 --> 0:07:55.520 at this point in I'll say the franchise, we're like 0:07:55.680 --> 0:07:59.200 running out of things for Shrek to be bad at. 0:08:00.040 --> 0:08:04.880 And yeah, this one feels a little, a little forced. Oh, 0:08:04.960 --> 0:08:07.360 I totally agree. All of the conflict in this movie 0:08:07.480 --> 0:08:11.680 is very contrived and it's so bizarre to me, like 0:08:12.440 --> 0:08:15.800 how far this movie, like the gymnastics it has to 0:08:15.840 --> 0:08:18.240 do to make it about fathers and sons when it 0:08:18.360 --> 0:08:20.920 just like did not have to be about fathers and sons. 0:08:21.080 --> 0:08:23.160 They make a whole new character so that the movie 0:08:23.160 --> 0:08:25.600 can be about fathers and sons. When at the beginning 0:08:25.920 --> 0:08:31.920 Fiona loses her father, there's the conflict. There's the thing, 0:08:32.679 --> 0:08:35.960 why are we creating and why are we making some 0:08:36.120 --> 0:08:42.560 like justin Timberlake character with Banks to have this plot 0:08:42.640 --> 0:08:46.439 rewriting the Arthur legend. It's like, I'm sorry, he becomes king, 0:08:46.480 --> 0:08:49.040 not because Shrek is like you should be king. He 0:08:49.120 --> 0:08:52.640 famously pulls a sword out of a stone. No sword, 0:08:52.880 --> 0:08:57.360 no stone, but pro of this movie, Donkey has a 0:08:57.400 --> 0:09:02.640 son named Bananas, which and I liked that ties the 0:09:02.679 --> 0:09:08.760 minions into I did like, yes, exactly, Egg you man, 0:09:09.040 --> 0:09:13.160 we really are close friends. So I was like, wow, 0:09:13.480 --> 0:09:15.480 there is a shipwreck. So I was like, okay, Titanic 0:09:15.559 --> 0:09:18.000 is here and I was like hey, donkey Son's name 0:09:18.080 --> 0:09:20.440 bananas and like okay, and so there, so the minions 0:09:20.440 --> 0:09:25.520 are here. Um, but ultimately, yeah, this is this is 0:09:25.559 --> 0:09:28.320 a challenging entry. But you know, I think that it's 0:09:28.800 --> 0:09:32.240 it would be silly to cover Shrek four with without 0:09:32.400 --> 0:09:36.080 kind of muscling through Shrek three. That's true. Went your 0:09:36.120 --> 0:09:39.480 history with this movie? I had only seen it once before, 0:09:39.720 --> 0:09:42.679 and I could not tell you when it was sometime 0:09:42.720 --> 0:09:47.280 between two thousand seven when this movie came out, and 0:09:48.600 --> 0:09:51.680 I would guess like I probably saw it around when 0:09:51.720 --> 0:09:54.960 it came out, maybe like or it could have been 0:09:54.960 --> 0:09:58.080 like two thousand fifteen. I don't know. Time is a 0:09:58.360 --> 0:10:00.839 very much a flat circle. Did you like it when 0:10:00.840 --> 0:10:02.480 you Did you like it when you saw it? I 0:10:02.520 --> 0:10:05.360 don't think so because I never returned to it after that. 0:10:05.600 --> 0:10:08.480 But you know what I will return to is Puss 0:10:08.480 --> 0:10:12.080 in Boots the Last Wish, which I saw. It is 0:10:12.120 --> 0:10:18.040 so good. It's like my third favorite movie. Yeah, I 0:10:18.080 --> 0:10:21.960 know that people are really loving Yeah, we I guess, um, 0:10:22.120 --> 0:10:24.640 I don't know why I'm I feel constantly defensive for 0:10:24.679 --> 0:10:27.880 no reason. Um it has something to do with my childhood. 0:10:28.120 --> 0:10:30.720 But um, we were supposed to see Puss and Boots 0:10:30.760 --> 0:10:36.840 together on Christmas Day and I both recently had COVID. 0:10:37.160 --> 0:10:40.800 So if you hate this episode, it's because we literally 0:10:40.840 --> 0:10:47.000 have brain damage, we post COVID brain fog. And yes, 0:10:47.480 --> 0:10:50.920 that's gonna be my excuse for everything moving forward in life. 0:10:51.200 --> 0:10:54.199 And the scary part is you may not even be wrong. 0:10:54.679 --> 0:10:59.400 I know, and that's been on my mind constantly. Anyways, 0:10:59.400 --> 0:11:05.760 Shrek three, sorry s also, my aunt died, but it's 0:11:06.800 --> 0:11:11.000 my condolences. The beginning of Shrek three reminded me because 0:11:11.000 --> 0:11:14.480 I'm the protagonist of the world. The beginning of Shrek 0:11:14.520 --> 0:11:18.320 three reminded me of my birthday party at medieval times. 0:11:18.480 --> 0:11:22.080 I had the same exact thought. Yes, I was thinking 0:11:22.080 --> 0:11:29.440 about Red Knight vibes. Yeah, folks were friends. Uh, I 0:11:29.440 --> 0:11:30.959 was thinking about the Red Knight. But I was like, wow, 0:11:31.000 --> 0:11:34.400 Prince Charming can't hold a candle to the Red Knight. 0:11:34.880 --> 0:11:38.120 I do like that, Like I do. I think it's 0:11:38.160 --> 0:11:40.760 like a trope, but a trope that I generally like. 0:11:41.080 --> 0:11:44.920 An aggrieved actor becoming a villain kind of never gets old. 0:11:44.960 --> 0:11:48.080 For me. I enjoy it, but I just don't like 0:11:48.520 --> 0:11:53.400 Charming as a character Paddington too much. Hello Hello, kind 0:11:53.440 --> 0:11:56.480 of the peak of that trope. Yeah, nothing's done it 0:11:56.520 --> 0:11:58.959 better than Paddington too. I didn't I should have thought 0:11:58.960 --> 0:12:01.319 of Paddington too, but that is I guess that's technically 0:12:01.360 --> 0:12:06.559 your department at the office. Thank you, the Bechtel cast 0:12:06.600 --> 0:12:11.000 office and the the director of the Paddington to department 0:12:11.120 --> 0:12:14.200 I thought of. I thought of the villain origin stories. 0:12:14.240 --> 0:12:17.319 At the opening scene where Prince Charming is working in 0:12:17.400 --> 0:12:20.880 a medieval times z restaurant, it's clear that they're pulling 0:12:20.920 --> 0:12:23.640 from that, and you know, he's like, I'm too good 0:12:23.679 --> 0:12:26.440 for this ship. I don't you don't appreciate me. Blah 0:12:26.440 --> 0:12:29.320 blah blah. Things that reminded me of Donald Trump at 0:12:29.320 --> 0:12:32.080 the White House Correspondence dinner, being made fun of and 0:12:32.120 --> 0:12:35.280 then deciding to ruin the world. Reminded me of that. 0:12:36.120 --> 0:12:38.520 Not that I mean not I and I don't like 0:12:38.640 --> 0:12:42.200 to make a Trump joke, because good lord, but it 0:12:42.240 --> 0:12:45.200 also kind of reminded me of the Joker. And it 0:12:45.400 --> 0:12:49.640 definitely reminded me of that episode of SpongeBob SquarePants. I 0:12:49.720 --> 0:12:53.959 watched it just the other day where SpongeBob or the 0:12:54.000 --> 0:12:57.360 Krusty Krab is putting on a talent show. Have you 0:12:57.360 --> 0:12:59.840 seen this one? I'm so sorry to say this, but 0:13:00.040 --> 0:13:06.240 I've never seen a single episode of SpongeBob SquarePants. I 0:13:06.240 --> 0:13:08.679 I know it took a second to hit me, but 0:13:10.320 --> 0:13:13.720 like not even one, really sorry, like not even bubbles 0:13:13.760 --> 0:13:16.480 or jelly fishing or I don't the one where they 0:13:16.480 --> 0:13:19.720 play the halftime show at the football game. No, not 0:13:19.760 --> 0:13:24.800 even the Krusty Crab training video. This this but I 0:13:24.840 --> 0:13:29.720 do remember. This is a lot I know that. Okay, okay, yes, 0:13:29.800 --> 0:13:34.200 no go. There's an episode where you, I frea something 0:13:34.240 --> 0:13:38.040 else reminded you of an episode of SpongeBob square Pants, 0:13:38.040 --> 0:13:40.520 and I just think remember you saying something like, it's 0:13:40.559 --> 0:13:44.040 like when maybe squid Word eats a crabby patty and 0:13:44.040 --> 0:13:47.079 then he eats a hundred crabby patties. Yes, that's a 0:13:47.120 --> 0:13:50.679 classic episode. I don't know what it means, but it is. 0:13:50.720 --> 0:13:52.839 I need to rewatch that. I think that there's maybe 0:13:53.080 --> 0:13:54.880 a bit of fat phobia in that episode. But the 0:13:55.040 --> 0:13:59.880 the line is squid Word can't stop eating crabby patties, 0:14:00.000 --> 0:14:03.600 compulsively eating the crappy patties and SpongeBob's on the other 0:14:03.640 --> 0:14:05.240 side of the door. He's like, you have to stop 0:14:05.240 --> 0:14:08.120 eating the crabby patties, and Squidbver says, what am I 0:14:08.120 --> 0:14:11.160 going to do? Blow up? And then SpongeBob says, no, 0:14:11.400 --> 0:14:14.040 it'll go straight to your thighs, and then they have 0:14:14.240 --> 0:14:15.920 indep gun straight to his eyes and then he says, 0:14:15.960 --> 0:14:17.960 and then you'll blow up, And then squid Red bloss 0:14:18.040 --> 0:14:22.160 up the best shover and that's comedy. That was not 0:14:22.200 --> 0:14:24.760 the episode I was thinking of. SpongeBob heads will know 0:14:24.800 --> 0:14:27.160 this one. It's a classic. I made someone watch it 0:14:27.200 --> 0:14:29.400 with me after I had sex with them, which was 0:14:29.480 --> 0:14:32.360 very powerful of me to do. Yeah, yeah, it was, 0:14:32.440 --> 0:14:34.960 but the sex was reminded me. It was not reminded 0:14:35.000 --> 0:14:36.440 me of that, but it was just on my mind. 0:14:37.720 --> 0:14:40.760 It's an episode where the Krusty Crab is putting on 0:14:41.160 --> 0:14:44.960 a talent show and squid Word he wants to be 0:14:45.040 --> 0:14:48.160 a respected artist. That's kind of a big part of 0:14:48.200 --> 0:14:51.080 his character, and so he's like, I'm gonna do a 0:14:51.240 --> 0:14:55.960 huge dance routine and everyone hates it. They think he's terrible, 0:14:56.360 --> 0:14:58.520 and then SpongeBob comes up and mops a little bit 0:14:58.560 --> 0:15:02.200 and people start cheering. But it reminded me of that 0:15:02.240 --> 0:15:06.280 because squid Word regularly feels so artistically rejected that he 0:15:06.320 --> 0:15:10.480 seems like he may in fact kill someone. And he 0:15:10.600 --> 0:15:12.640 runs out on stage on this one and he says, 0:15:13.160 --> 0:15:16.800 you don't even no talent, and then the audience starts 0:15:17.240 --> 0:15:23.280 yelling back at him, no talent, no tell do you 0:15:23.320 --> 0:15:28.040 get it? I get it. It's very names, but I understand. 0:15:28.160 --> 0:15:30.400 The person I had s swith also wasn't cracking up 0:15:30.440 --> 0:15:32.480 at that, and I thought that was interesting, and then 0:15:32.480 --> 0:15:38.960 I kicked him out of my house. Um, well should 0:15:38.960 --> 0:15:43.400 we be? I truly feel like I've entered a new 0:15:43.480 --> 0:15:48.080 area of my brain today. I am now just constantly 0:15:48.200 --> 0:15:53.120 in an altered state of reality. Well we don't use 0:15:53.280 --> 0:15:56.480 what is it like, we don't use our brains, But 0:15:56.640 --> 0:16:02.680 today that changes. Yeah, I am now able to access 0:16:02.720 --> 0:16:07.000 the other of my brain. That was a Scarlett Johanson 0:16:07.040 --> 0:16:11.760 movie once. Yeah, Lucy, she's I think when Yeah, alright, 0:16:11.840 --> 0:16:15.920 chruck three, let's do it. Here we go. Actually, let's 0:16:15.920 --> 0:16:17.680 take a quick break and then we will come back 0:16:17.720 --> 0:16:28.440 for the recap and we are back. Okay. We open 0:16:28.680 --> 0:16:33.880 on Gingi Pinocchio and then also it's Pinocchio War's time, 0:16:34.280 --> 0:16:37.120 and I was triggered when I saw Pinocchio. I was like, 0:16:37.320 --> 0:16:41.120 he had another Pinocchio. Well, okay, so this is not 0:16:41.160 --> 0:16:43.520 a spoiler or anything, but in Puss and Boots the 0:16:43.600 --> 0:16:48.360 Last Wish, Pinocchio makes a little cameo. So there are 0:16:48.440 --> 0:16:54.200 three Pinocchio movies in well, there's there's four, because there's 0:16:54.240 --> 0:16:57.360 like the Crummy, there's a there's a fourth one. Maggie 0:16:57.360 --> 0:17:01.120 Maykors sent it to me, and it's it's not like 0:17:01.200 --> 0:17:04.320 the animation you find at the gas station, but it 0:17:04.520 --> 0:17:07.000 looks like the animation you find at the gas station. 0:17:07.320 --> 0:17:10.959 Not a theatrically released Pinocchio, but a really cheap so 0:17:11.040 --> 0:17:16.080 it's like the Legend of Titanic version of Pinocchio. Yeah, 0:17:16.119 --> 0:17:18.520 except it came out last year, which is kind of wild. 0:17:19.840 --> 0:17:22.639 I'm clear who it's for, no idea. Um, okay, So 0:17:22.840 --> 0:17:25.560 we've got Gingi, Pinocchio, the Big Bed Wolf, and the 0:17:25.560 --> 0:17:29.119 Three Little Pigs. They are watching Prince Charming do Dinner 0:17:29.160 --> 0:17:31.879 theater because he's a loser now and his life is 0:17:31.880 --> 0:17:34.840 in shambles, and he is bitter because he thinks that 0:17:34.920 --> 0:17:38.600 he's the rightful King of Far Far away. But guess 0:17:38.640 --> 0:17:41.920 who is king or at least filling in for king 0:17:42.000 --> 0:17:46.879 while the real king is sick. It's Shrek. Oh, and 0:17:46.960 --> 0:17:49.280 I bet he's going to be a little awkward, random, 0:17:49.480 --> 0:17:53.359 and uh, not quite at home being the king. Yeah, 0:17:53.400 --> 0:17:57.000 you would be correct. Yeah, So he and Fiona are 0:17:57.320 --> 0:18:01.399 sort of like stepping in as king and queen for 0:18:01.480 --> 0:18:06.640 the time being. Donkey and Puss and Boots are obviously around, 0:18:06.800 --> 0:18:10.600 they are still the sidekicks. And like you said, Shrek 0:18:10.720 --> 0:18:13.840 is bad at being king. And he's like, Fiona, we 0:18:13.920 --> 0:18:17.160 are leaving and going back to the swamp, and she's like, yeah, 0:18:17.240 --> 0:18:19.880 and maybe when we're there we could start a family. 0:18:20.680 --> 0:18:27.760 And Shrek is not thrilled by this idea because of trumps. Yes. 0:18:28.960 --> 0:18:33.600 And then the king is on his deathbed and he's like, Shrek, 0:18:34.040 --> 0:18:37.639 you're next in line to be king, and Shrek is 0:18:37.680 --> 0:18:40.760 like an ogre king. That sounds like a bad idea, 0:18:41.359 --> 0:18:44.040 and the king is like, well there is one other option, 0:18:44.680 --> 0:18:48.600 cousin Arthur. Okay, bye bye, and then he dies. That 0:18:48.680 --> 0:18:53.280 scene is so frustrating to me because Fiona is standing 0:18:53.400 --> 0:18:57.919 right there. We spend so much of Shrek three acting 0:18:57.960 --> 0:19:01.919 like Shrek to literally never happy because Shrek two is 0:19:01.920 --> 0:19:04.520 a lot of like Fiona coming into her own as 0:19:04.520 --> 0:19:08.399 a person and like figuring out her role in this. 0:19:08.560 --> 0:19:11.199 Also it's like, this is a very pro monarchy. If 0:19:11.280 --> 0:19:13.000 we can't deal with it today, we can't deal with 0:19:13.040 --> 0:19:16.240 it today. I understand it's very pro monarchy and more 0:19:16.280 --> 0:19:19.880 pro monarchy as as it goes on. And it's like, 0:19:20.200 --> 0:19:23.399 I'm just I'm assuming that they're colonial. You know, they 0:19:23.480 --> 0:19:28.200 tried to colonize Shrek Swamp. Hello the plot of Shrek one, 0:19:28.720 --> 0:19:30.320 we know what, we love it. I don't think that 0:19:30.359 --> 0:19:32.800 we had the cultural know how at the time to 0:19:33.480 --> 0:19:35.920 say that in our first episode about Trek, but I 0:19:35.960 --> 0:19:39.760 do think that there are like actively truly serious brain 0:19:39.840 --> 0:19:43.879 returning to the brain. I no, um, they're a colonial force. 0:19:44.040 --> 0:19:47.720 It's a monarchy. But if we're going with girl Boss 0:19:47.840 --> 0:19:52.080 logic of like girl is king is good whatever, Fiona 0:19:52.160 --> 0:19:54.520 is right fucking there. We've spent so much of Shrek 0:19:54.520 --> 0:19:56.560 two of her coming into her own and then the 0:19:56.600 --> 0:20:03.399 third movie acts like nothing happened. Nothing happened, because I 0:20:03.440 --> 0:20:05.800 did think that, Like I was like, I wonder if 0:20:05.840 --> 0:20:09.119 her father will even suggest that she could be you know, 0:20:09.200 --> 0:20:12.080 in power as a joke. I wonder if she will 0:20:12.119 --> 0:20:14.760 say what about me as a joke, But it doesn't 0:20:14.760 --> 0:20:18.800 even it doesn't even come up. It's we have a 0:20:18.800 --> 0:20:22.720 new character, we hired justin Timberlake to do it, and 0:20:22.720 --> 0:20:26.800 why and and why? But yeah, that's that's what happens. 0:20:26.920 --> 0:20:30.080 And then he dies. Oh the king dies, Yes, as 0:20:30.119 --> 0:20:33.119 a frog. He's a frog. He's in his frog state. 0:20:33.520 --> 0:20:38.160 Sees Trek two for why that is we've got brain fog. 0:20:38.800 --> 0:20:43.240 The king has brain frog and then he doesn't because 0:20:43.280 --> 0:20:55.600 he dies and then he's brain his brain is dead. Okay. Meanwhile, meanwhile, 0:20:56.119 --> 0:20:59.840 Charming goes into a tavern where a bunch of Fairy 0:21:00.040 --> 0:21:03.320 Hill villains are hanging out, and I do not appreciate 0:21:03.359 --> 0:21:07.160 the implication that only villains would hang out at a pub, 0:21:07.280 --> 0:21:10.840 or like that a pub or tavern would be full 0:21:10.920 --> 0:21:14.480 of only villains and no one else as a frequenter 0:21:14.520 --> 0:21:21.280 of pubs dark corridors exactly. Yet another way that this 0:21:21.520 --> 0:21:25.480 movie kind of like feels like it's contradicting prior entries 0:21:25.520 --> 0:21:30.160 to the franchise is that like Charming. Okay, well, let's 0:21:30.240 --> 0:21:32.560 let's say what Charming is doing. He's trying to like 0:21:32.840 --> 0:21:38.320 galvanize the villains. Yeah, he's like, hey hook, Hey evil 0:21:38.400 --> 0:21:42.560 Queen from snow White, Hey rumpel Stiltskin, join me in 0:21:42.600 --> 0:21:46.880 this cause of kind of reclaiming our own narratives, and 0:21:47.320 --> 0:21:52.520 it's our turn to get happily ever after, which I 0:21:52.560 --> 0:21:56.760 feel like it's not anywhere close to like one for one, 0:21:56.840 --> 0:21:59.480 what's happening in Shrek one, but the theme is similar 0:21:59.520 --> 0:22:04.760 of like these like classically villainized characters are trying to 0:22:04.880 --> 0:22:08.640 like prove that there's more to them than how they've 0:22:08.680 --> 0:22:13.000 been classically characterized. That is literally Shrek's arc all the 0:22:13.080 --> 0:22:17.399 time in every fucking movie, but this time it's bad, 0:22:17.720 --> 0:22:22.840 and you're like, well, what I would say that this movie, 0:22:23.119 --> 0:22:27.840 Shrek the Third is not particularly shreky in And I 0:22:27.880 --> 0:22:31.440 can't believe it took us over twenty minutes to say 0:22:31.520 --> 0:22:34.480 Shrek I in in this episode about a Shrek movie 0:22:34.840 --> 0:22:37.760 merch plug, We've got Shreky and March. I'm looking at 0:22:37.760 --> 0:22:40.639 my Shrek pillow, my shreky and pillow. I have my 0:22:40.680 --> 0:22:44.000 shreky and sweatshirt not on because it's in the wash 0:22:44.040 --> 0:22:47.760 because I can't stop wearing it. And that's heap off 0:22:47.920 --> 0:22:52.719 dot com slash the Bechtel cast. Yes, um, but this 0:22:52.800 --> 0:22:54.800 is the least Shreky and entry. It's like this, It's 0:22:54.840 --> 0:22:57.120 like Shrek three doesn't even know what happens in Shreks 0:22:57.119 --> 0:23:00.040 one and two, which is wild because they fucking lived it. 0:23:00.040 --> 0:23:05.240 It's absurd. Um Okay. So, so Charming is is rallying 0:23:05.440 --> 0:23:08.760 the fairy tale villains to, you know, be like, hey, 0:23:08.800 --> 0:23:12.280 it's it's our turn to be the heroes or whatever. 0:23:13.000 --> 0:23:14.760 So then when we cut back to Shrek, he is 0:23:14.800 --> 0:23:18.160 about to go on a voyage to find cousin Arthur. 0:23:18.560 --> 0:23:23.760 But before he leaves, Fiona is like, Shrek, I'm gregnant. 0:23:24.600 --> 0:23:28.440 But also I was, I was considering experimenting with shreknant 0:23:29.280 --> 0:23:36.640 or shregnant. I like, shregnant. Well, you coined the term 0:23:36.640 --> 0:23:39.879 shreg in our Shrek two episode. I don't know if 0:23:39.920 --> 0:23:42.840 you remember this, Jamie. No, I just have so many 0:23:42.880 --> 0:23:46.320 good ideas that I just kind of forget about someone though. 0:23:46.960 --> 0:23:49.480 I that was so good of me to do. I'm 0:23:49.520 --> 0:23:54.960 so glad I did that, So proud of you. So, 0:23:54.800 --> 0:24:01.680 so Fiona is like I'm shregnant and is like yeah, 0:24:02.760 --> 0:24:07.400 but he's very worried about being a bad dad because 0:24:07.400 --> 0:24:11.040 ogres are not known for being nurturing. Oh my god, 0:24:11.320 --> 0:24:16.520 such a forced plot point. I'm like, enough with the 0:24:16.560 --> 0:24:22.520 ogre lore. Oh my goodness, it's a lot. I also wait, 0:24:22.720 --> 0:24:28.359 quick question, So the timing of like when they're in 0:24:29.160 --> 0:24:33.640 Far Far Away, do you think that they fucked raw 0:24:36.640 --> 0:24:39.480 the day her father died? I'll ask it. Do you 0:24:39.520 --> 0:24:42.040 think they fucked raw the day her father died? Or 0:24:42.040 --> 0:24:45.600 do you think it was before? Good question. It seems 0:24:45.640 --> 0:24:50.399 as though Shrek leaves on this journey very shortly thereafter, 0:24:51.320 --> 0:24:53.600 but then that introduces like, well, we don't know about 0:24:53.600 --> 0:24:58.640 ogre gestation. Well, yes, true, so maybe they fucked raw 0:24:58.760 --> 0:25:02.440 and then two days it or she knows she's shregnant, 0:25:02.640 --> 0:25:06.479 she's shregnant. I would have actually, because this movie likes, 0:25:06.720 --> 0:25:09.320 you know, it's very shreky in to show something that 0:25:09.400 --> 0:25:13.520 happens in the real world, but like covereding goo and stinky. 0:25:13.720 --> 0:25:16.960 I would have liked to see a stinky pregnancy test. Oh. 0:25:17.520 --> 0:25:21.159 I would have liked to see it, say shregnant on 0:25:21.280 --> 0:25:23.920 the clear blue or the clear green, more like clear 0:25:24.000 --> 0:25:28.879 green test. Okay, okay, now we're talking. We're writing a 0:25:28.880 --> 0:25:33.199 movie right now there, So I want the clear green 0:25:33.480 --> 0:25:36.600 to show two gooey lines and it says. She says, 0:25:36.600 --> 0:25:40.159 oh no, I'm shregnant. Um and then to you this 0:25:40.680 --> 0:25:45.920 my piece smells horrible or whatever. Yeah, but we don't 0:25:45.920 --> 0:25:49.159 get that. We just get the scene where Fiona is like, 0:25:49.200 --> 0:25:55.600 I'm shregnant, and then Shrek is reacting with apprehension. He 0:25:55.680 --> 0:25:59.920