WEBVTT - Dear Banya: A Super… Food!

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<v Speaker 1>Scrubbing In with Bec Tilly and Tanya rap an iHeartRadio podcast.

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<v Speaker 2>Hello, everybody, we are scrubbing it scrub a dub. This

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<v Speaker 2>is a Dear Bonya episode. It is back to back weeks.

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<v Speaker 3>Different from Ask Banya. We've discussed this.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, yeah, yeah, it's not Ask Banya, it's Dear Bonie.

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<v Speaker 2>These are in depth questions that need in depth answers. Yes,

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<v Speaker 2>and again this is just our experience. We're just answering unprofessionally, yes,

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<v Speaker 2>but honestly about how we would handle the situations that

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<v Speaker 2>y'all are going through if we.

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<v Speaker 1>Were in your shoes, So like if you put your

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<v Speaker 1>feet in our shoes, well, if we put our feet

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<v Speaker 1>in your shoes, right, what we would do in that

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<v Speaker 1>situation exactly? And we can only gauge from our.

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<v Speaker 2>Perspective exactly, from our personal experience exactly, And that's where

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<v Speaker 2>our answers come from the heart, all of us here

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<v Speaker 2>in the scrubbing In.

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<v Speaker 1>But I do feel wiser, if I must say so,

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<v Speaker 1>because I'm older now, So I do tell you so

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<v Speaker 1>much how quickly we forget? Yeah, yeah, but I do

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<v Speaker 1>feel smarter and wiser.

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<v Speaker 2>What time were you born? Though?

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<v Speaker 1>On the eighteen nine something PM.

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<v Speaker 2>So it's technically you haven't gotten there yet.

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<v Speaker 1>It goes by the time I heard.

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<v Speaker 2>Challenge, or just like because you forgot, I didn't forget.

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<v Speaker 1>Where's my text message? Smarter?

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<v Speaker 2>We're having a small day. So, yeah, you do feel wiser.

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<v Speaker 2>I do.

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<v Speaker 1>I feel exponentially wiser than I did yesterday. Wow, you

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<v Speaker 1>get ready for this advice.

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<v Speaker 2>I can't wait to hear what you offered the Rubbers today.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, watch what I do this year?

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<v Speaker 2>Stay tuned.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, Sonic the Hedgehog just zooming around you.

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<v Speaker 2>We have referenced Sonic on this podcast a lot, which

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<v Speaker 2>is so unexpected.

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<v Speaker 1>I know, I can't tell you why I want to

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<v Speaker 1>be on that movie. I want to be a character.

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<v Speaker 1>I want to be like the modern woman Hedgehog. I

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<v Speaker 1>don't know if she exists, but if she does, I

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<v Speaker 1>so badly want to voice her.

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<v Speaker 2>You did an audition, you remember for the character and

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<v Speaker 2>how your voice would sound if you.

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<v Speaker 1>Get to be a I don't know if that made

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<v Speaker 1>it to the movie company that makes those.

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<v Speaker 3>Can we hear that again?

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<v Speaker 1>I can't remember exactly how I did it. But she's

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<v Speaker 1>kind of like this.

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<v Speaker 2>She was really cute.

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<v Speaker 1>She was have like a high, big voice, and she

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<v Speaker 1>was like, come on, Sonic, my god, this it's cute.

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<v Speaker 3>Right, Why can't you just be your regular voice. You've

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<v Speaker 3>kind of a high pitch.

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<v Speaker 2>Now you need to go back to your voice that

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<v Speaker 2>used to have with air R.

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<v Speaker 1>Rose. So I'm saving that.

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<v Speaker 3>For I also want to have that. I think I

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<v Speaker 3>have that.

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<v Speaker 1>We have a packed by the time I'm thirty three,

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<v Speaker 1>so I have you have for about six years. Well

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<v Speaker 1>here's the thing. I think Andy is attractive.

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<v Speaker 3>Andy, come here for a second. Thank you. He is

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<v Speaker 3>a good looking guy.

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<v Speaker 2>You think he's smart.

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<v Speaker 1>I think he's attractive and smart, and I do think

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<v Speaker 1>he's nice. Yeah, but we work together, so that's weird.

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<v Speaker 3>That's a good Amy Rose voice right there. Yeah, Gypsy Rose.

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<v Speaker 1>I also realized. I also realized, did you end up

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<v Speaker 1>seeing Inside Out too? No?

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<v Speaker 2>But I'm really excited too, Okay.

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<v Speaker 1>So I also just want to put it in the

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<v Speaker 1>universe that when Inside Out three comes out, I really

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<v Speaker 1>want there to be a delulu emotion and I need.

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<v Speaker 2>And I want to.

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<v Speaker 1>Right, yes, I need this to happen.

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<v Speaker 2>How do who makes some is that Pixar?

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<v Speaker 1>Pixar? Yeah, well, we got.

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<v Speaker 2>To find someone who works there because that's good.

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<v Speaker 1>There, and like because think about what other emotions can

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<v Speaker 1>there be, Like, there's only so many emotions, delusional has

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<v Speaker 1>to be one of them, right.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, you're a cute idea.

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<v Speaker 1>I like it, de Lulu. And then I'll come up

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<v Speaker 1>with an amazing voice for that.

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<v Speaker 2>I think you just be yourself.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, thank you. So anyways, you know, just just dreaming

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<v Speaker 1>big on this day.

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<v Speaker 2>I love that manifesting big things in her voiceover.

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<v Speaker 1>World career that is non existent at this point. But

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<v Speaker 1>you know, reach for the stars and you land. Oh wait,

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<v Speaker 1>what is it?

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, reach for the stars, you land on the moon.

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<v Speaker 1>No, it's reach for the moon and you land amongst

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<v Speaker 1>the stars. Yeah, for the moon.

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<v Speaker 4>Keep your feet on the ground.

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<v Speaker 1>No is that carest is my American Top forty host.

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<v Speaker 2>Do you know what I was thinking about?

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<v Speaker 1>What?

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<v Speaker 2>I was watching Friends last night and it was an

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<v Speaker 2>episode where Monica and Richard had just broken up and

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<v Speaker 2>she gets a voicemail and then she like can't figure

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<v Speaker 2>out if it's from like when they were together, or

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<v Speaker 2>if it was like if he had contacted her after

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<v Speaker 2>the breakup, and so she's like freaking out and then

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<v Speaker 2>she tries to call him back and she's like, I'm breezy,

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<v Speaker 2>and I was like, this is so tawn.

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<v Speaker 1>I am Monica.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, you have a lot of Monica, a lot of Monica.

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<v Speaker 1>Tendancies like truly, and I I consider myself a catch.

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<v Speaker 1>When I look back on certain things in my relationship

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<v Speaker 1>with Robbie, I'm like, God, bless that man, because I

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<v Speaker 1>was a lottimes a lot.

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<v Speaker 3>You will be a lot. It's a lot. It's a lot.

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<v Speaker 1>Not too much, but not not not not for him.

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<v Speaker 3>Let's let him answer that the perfect amount.

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<v Speaker 2>You're the perfect amount for Robbie. Yeah. Have we talked

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<v Speaker 2>about during the break up, the not the Lulu things

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<v Speaker 2>you did? But just like saying, yeah, have we talked

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<v Speaker 2>about that on the podcast?

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<v Speaker 1>I don't know.

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<v Speaker 2>But when you went to the snow, No, I didn't

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<v Speaker 2>go that.

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<v Speaker 1>I didn't even go to the snow.

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<v Speaker 2>Pretended he went to the snow, rob you must have

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<v Speaker 2>talked about obsessed with the snow like he loves he's

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<v Speaker 2>like a snow bunny.

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<v Speaker 1>And I know this, and uh, we were broken up

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<v Speaker 1>and he would be the first person to watch my

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<v Speaker 1>stories anything that one of my Instagram stories. He was

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<v Speaker 1>like the first few.

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<v Speaker 3>Always broken up at this point, no contact, Yeah.

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<v Speaker 4>Because following you or was he just watching your stories?

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<v Speaker 1>No? No, we never un followed each other. Okay, yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>so he was still following me and watching all my stories.

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<v Speaker 1>And I'm like, why did I think of this? I

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<v Speaker 1>don't know, but I saw Tory moral you shout out

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<v Speaker 1>to Tori, yes you love her? And I saw that

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<v Speaker 1>she was in said snow somewhere and we kind of

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<v Speaker 1>have like similar I mean not really, but like in

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<v Speaker 1>the snow you all look the same, you know, and

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<v Speaker 1>it was like ear and all that gear. I was like,

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<v Speaker 1>Tory is very tall, very tall, and her hair is

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<v Speaker 1>a lot darker than mine, but like whatever I was

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<v Speaker 1>taking the snow, it doesn't really matter, like the big

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<v Speaker 1>chuck things. And I was like, you gotta do your

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<v Speaker 1>girl solid. Can you send me any photos of like

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<v Speaker 1>you writing like a heart in the snow, or like

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<v Speaker 1>your feet in the snow, or like you making snow

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<v Speaker 1>angels in the snow, something that looks like it could

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<v Speaker 1>be me in the snow. And she delivered. She sent

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<v Speaker 1>me exclusive pictures that I posted.

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<v Speaker 2>Immediately went up, immediately went right up, and guess what,

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<v Speaker 2>immediately got a response from Robbie. What did he say?

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<v Speaker 1>Just like something like so cool? Jealous? Where are you?

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<v Speaker 1>And guess what I did?

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<v Speaker 2>Left him on red?

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<v Speaker 1>Didn't even open it?

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<v Speaker 3>Oh ball exactly?

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<v Speaker 2>Wait? Is that more baller than left him on Red?

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<v Speaker 4>I think so.

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<v Speaker 1>I think so too, because I doesn't even care to

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<v Speaker 1>open it.

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<v Speaker 4>Yes, it also implies you're getting so many dms you don't.

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<v Speaker 3>So far to bury.

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<v Speaker 1>That's buried.

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<v Speaker 2>Interesting. I feel more savage if someone leaves me on

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<v Speaker 2>red as opposed to them just never seeing.

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<v Speaker 1>It, because I think sometimes, like I know, sometimes I'll

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<v Speaker 1>read a d M and I won't respond. And it's

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<v Speaker 1>not because I'm like mad or upset.

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<v Speaker 3>I just you think someone on red feels more calculated.

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<v Speaker 1>To me.

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<v Speaker 3>It feels like they're playing a game. Oh they read it,

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<v Speaker 3>but they're not going to responding it. You can't assume

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<v Speaker 3>they're playing a game.

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<v Speaker 4>Like what you said on Monday, the opposite of love

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<v Speaker 4>is a different is not opening the DM.

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<v Speaker 2>That's all. That's a lumineer's lyric. I can't take credit

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<v Speaker 2>the opposite of loves and friends?

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<v Speaker 1>No, And then he reached back out on Valentine's Day.

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<v Speaker 1>Back out on Valentine's Day responded to one of my stories,

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<v Speaker 1>left that one unread as well, what.

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<v Speaker 2>Did you postal?

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<v Speaker 3>Not?

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<v Speaker 2>One that got his peaked is interesting.

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<v Speaker 1>Heart shaped cookies with initials and I like blocked out

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<v Speaker 1>one of the initials.

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<v Speaker 3>Oh my gosh, so one cookie said, or.

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<v Speaker 1>We don't know that, and then he and then he

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<v Speaker 1>reached out after the golden globes. And then I was

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<v Speaker 1>tired and hungover and I finally opened the d M.

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<v Speaker 2>It's my time.

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<v Speaker 3>Time.

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<v Speaker 2>Do you still check to see who watches your story?

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<v Speaker 1>I don't really like check to see, but like, if

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<v Speaker 1>I go through the st people's names pop up, but

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<v Speaker 1>I don't really check.

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<v Speaker 2>Do you check?

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<v Speaker 4>No, I see the likes? Who likes my story? That's

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<v Speaker 4>very important to me.

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<v Speaker 2>Do you know I just didn't know because you I mean,

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<v Speaker 2>I do think that if that would be obsession check

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<v Speaker 2>and if I didn't see her name within the first

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<v Speaker 2>ten seconds.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, well let me tell you. I'm not going to

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<v Speaker 1>name this friend because I'm just not going to name her.

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<v Speaker 1>But I wasn't even as bad as one of my

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<v Speaker 1>other friends. Because she would constantly she would look at

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<v Speaker 1>the number of followers that her ex had and if

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<v Speaker 1>it knew exactly followers. Yeah, so whoever he was following,

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<v Speaker 1>she had that number, okay, and if it went up

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<v Speaker 1>anytime she would find out who he added, and then

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<v Speaker 1>like look at that person? What person was? It's not

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<v Speaker 1>a bad idea, it's not. It's actually a great idea

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<v Speaker 1>if anyone out there needs that.

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<v Speaker 2>Hasn't hurt anyone. No, no, that maybe you're your own feelings.

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<v Speaker 1>Except your own sanity.

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<v Speaker 2>It only affects your own Sandy always.

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<v Speaker 4>I just love the idea of like seeing the number

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<v Speaker 4>change and going like, oh, who do you follow Jersey Mike's.

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<v Speaker 2>I saw it go down one and didn't realize it

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<v Speaker 2>was you.

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<v Speaker 1>Oh that would be that would hurt, that would hurt.

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<v Speaker 2>All right, we gotta get to that. We're taking our

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<v Speaker 2>own advice here. We gotta we gotta give.

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<v Speaker 5>Breaks, all right, all right, right past, all right, we

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<v Speaker 5>are back and ready to answer the hard hitting questions

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<v Speaker 5>from our scrubbers.

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<v Speaker 3>Are scrubbers, here we go. Follow up advice from Laura.

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<v Speaker 3>Laura says it's me again, Laura, who had the challenges

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<v Speaker 3>with her boyfriend traveling a lot because of his job

0:11:58.679 --> 0:12:01.600
<v Speaker 3>with the sports agency. I took your advice. I really

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<v Speaker 3>took a look at what our communication gaps were, and

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<v Speaker 3>we came up with check in times and tools that

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<v Speaker 3>helped make me feel really safe. I made never to

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<v Speaker 3>focus on some hobbies and make time with my friends.

0:12:11.360 --> 0:12:14.240
<v Speaker 3>So far, so good, so thank you. But now he's

0:12:14.320 --> 0:12:16.160
<v Speaker 3>leaving for the Olympics to do some scouring and I'll

0:12:16.160 --> 0:12:17.760
<v Speaker 3>be gone and he'll be gone for a long time.

0:12:18.160 --> 0:12:20.160
<v Speaker 3>I wanted to ask Becca, it seems like Haley's been

0:12:20.200 --> 0:12:21.920
<v Speaker 3>gone for a long time, and you seemed to be

0:12:21.960 --> 0:12:23.920
<v Speaker 3>handling it better than once you went on tour. This

0:12:24.000 --> 0:12:25.760
<v Speaker 3>is what we just talked about on Monday. Did you

0:12:25.840 --> 0:12:28.640
<v Speaker 3>approach this differently? My boyfriend and I usually only a

0:12:28.720 --> 0:12:30.400
<v Speaker 3>part for a week at most, but he'll be gone

0:12:30.400 --> 0:12:32.280
<v Speaker 3>for six weeks and I won't be able to visit

0:12:32.360 --> 0:12:33.479
<v Speaker 3>due to work obligations.

0:12:36.200 --> 0:12:38.760
<v Speaker 2>First of all, I'm so proud of you, both of

0:12:38.840 --> 0:12:42.480
<v Speaker 2>you for focusing on where the gaps were and coming

0:12:42.600 --> 0:12:47.480
<v Speaker 2>up with ways to help both of you get through

0:12:47.559 --> 0:12:50.959
<v Speaker 2>this like in a healthy way. So Haley and I,

0:12:51.559 --> 0:12:57.000
<v Speaker 2>I think what happened last year was there was just

0:12:57.160 --> 0:12:59.360
<v Speaker 2>like certain things that I didn't feel safe about, and

0:12:59.480 --> 0:13:04.640
<v Speaker 2>so when I would communicate those things, she would almost

0:13:04.760 --> 0:13:07.400
<v Speaker 2>pull away because she had so much going on that

0:13:07.480 --> 0:13:09.640
<v Speaker 2>it was almost like too much for her. So even though,

0:13:09.880 --> 0:13:12.920
<v Speaker 2>like she would say all the things that in a typical,

0:13:13.720 --> 0:13:16.480
<v Speaker 2>like healthy state would normally make me feel better, but

0:13:16.600 --> 0:13:18.760
<v Speaker 2>because I would get into like a spiral and I

0:13:18.800 --> 0:13:21.000
<v Speaker 2>couldn't like self soothe, I was.

0:13:21.200 --> 0:13:23.640
<v Speaker 1>Just like, oh soothe, it is not the right word.

0:13:23.840 --> 0:13:27.800
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, I couldn't like calm myself down. So therefore she

0:13:28.000 --> 0:13:31.199
<v Speaker 2>really couldn't say anything that made me feel calm. So

0:13:31.679 --> 0:13:35.640
<v Speaker 2>before she left for this time, we kind of figured

0:13:35.679 --> 0:13:38.679
<v Speaker 2>out what were the things that I was needing, And

0:13:38.840 --> 0:13:41.160
<v Speaker 2>I think, oh, something for me was that I love

0:13:41.320 --> 0:13:44.760
<v Speaker 2>quality time. And I realized that for her, she felt

0:13:44.800 --> 0:13:46.360
<v Speaker 2>like even if she was just checking in with me

0:13:46.400 --> 0:13:49.199
<v Speaker 2>and letting me know what she was doing, that that

0:13:49.480 --> 0:13:52.360
<v Speaker 2>was her giving me quality time. But what happened was

0:13:52.480 --> 0:13:54.840
<v Speaker 2>she would be like, Oh, we're having so much fun

0:13:54.920 --> 0:13:56.800
<v Speaker 2>and we're doing this, this and this, and I would

0:13:56.840 --> 0:13:59.760
<v Speaker 2>just be like, I'm miserable and you're having so much

0:14:00.440 --> 0:14:02.720
<v Speaker 2>without me, Like it made me like hurt my feelings

0:14:02.840 --> 0:14:06.199
<v Speaker 2>so much. Yeah, which wasn't a healthy mindset, because you

0:14:06.240 --> 0:14:08.160
<v Speaker 2>should be able to have fun without your partner and

0:14:08.400 --> 0:14:10.160
<v Speaker 2>they should be able to have fun without you, right,

0:14:11.400 --> 0:14:13.319
<v Speaker 2>but I was in a different mindset at that time,

0:14:13.440 --> 0:14:16.240
<v Speaker 2>So this time it's been like she does check ins

0:14:16.240 --> 0:14:18.599
<v Speaker 2>when she can. I also just know because I was

0:14:18.720 --> 0:14:21.840
<v Speaker 2>up there her first week when the project kind of started.

0:14:22.680 --> 0:14:24.400
<v Speaker 2>I saw what it was like during the day and

0:14:24.440 --> 0:14:27.360
<v Speaker 2>how insane it was. So now I don't make up

0:14:27.440 --> 0:14:29.680
<v Speaker 2>things of like why haven't I heard from her. I'm

0:14:29.760 --> 0:14:31.840
<v Speaker 2>just like, I know what the schedule is like, and

0:14:32.320 --> 0:14:34.080
<v Speaker 2>if I do hear from her she checks in or

0:14:34.160 --> 0:14:36.400
<v Speaker 2>calls me, it's like a little bonus. But most of

0:14:36.440 --> 0:14:37.640
<v Speaker 2>the time I know I'm going to talk to her

0:14:37.680 --> 0:14:40.600
<v Speaker 2>at night, and then when she has time, we do

0:14:40.760 --> 0:14:42.800
<v Speaker 2>things that we love to do that's quality time, like

0:14:42.880 --> 0:14:45.320
<v Speaker 2>play games over the phone or like do things that

0:14:45.440 --> 0:14:48.440
<v Speaker 2>we would do if she was already together. So I

0:14:48.480 --> 0:14:50.840
<v Speaker 2>think that's just been helpful and also just you know,

0:14:51.240 --> 0:14:57.560
<v Speaker 2>knowing that it really came from like confidence and security

0:14:57.840 --> 0:15:01.120
<v Speaker 2>in my own self that had nothing to do with her.

0:15:01.680 --> 0:15:02.520
<v Speaker 2>That's been a big part.

0:15:03.880 --> 0:15:06.560
<v Speaker 1>I'm beca answered it perfectly, So I'm just gonna sprinkle

0:15:06.560 --> 0:15:08.800
<v Speaker 1>a little thing in there. But like, if you feel something,

0:15:08.920 --> 0:15:11.360
<v Speaker 1>say it, because I have an experience, like I don't

0:15:11.640 --> 0:15:13.120
<v Speaker 1>roby and I don't have to be a part like

0:15:13.200 --> 0:15:15.840
<v Speaker 1>this ever. But when he was in New York for

0:15:15.920 --> 0:15:18.040
<v Speaker 1>that wedding, we were apart for four days, and like

0:15:18.560 --> 0:15:20.840
<v Speaker 1>when he landed in New York, he was like, I

0:15:20.920 --> 0:15:23.240
<v Speaker 1>miss you already, and I was like, that's so cute,

0:15:23.320 --> 0:15:24.480
<v Speaker 1>you know what I mean, Like we were living apart

0:15:24.560 --> 0:15:26.800
<v Speaker 1>for whatever six hours, and I was like, that's so cute,

0:15:26.840 --> 0:15:28.480
<v Speaker 1>and like you'd always say just little things like that

0:15:29.120 --> 0:15:30.880
<v Speaker 1>about you know, like I he hit such a good

0:15:30.920 --> 0:15:32.280
<v Speaker 1>time at the wedding, he had such a good time

0:15:32.320 --> 0:15:34.000
<v Speaker 1>at you know, all the things he did around the wedding,

0:15:34.000 --> 0:15:35.280
<v Speaker 1>but he was like, I wish you were there, and like,

0:15:35.800 --> 0:15:37.760
<v Speaker 1>you know, just saying those little things means a lot.

0:15:38.040 --> 0:15:40.040
<v Speaker 2>I was gonna say that too. Haley has done a

0:15:40.080 --> 0:15:41.920
<v Speaker 2>really good job of being like I had so much fun.

0:15:42.000 --> 0:15:43.760
<v Speaker 2>We did this, this and this, and it was so

0:15:43.840 --> 0:15:45.400
<v Speaker 2>much fun. But it would have been even better if

0:15:45.440 --> 0:15:47.560
<v Speaker 2>you were there. So it just gives me reassurance that

0:15:47.680 --> 0:15:49.880
<v Speaker 2>she's thinking of me and missing me, which I already know,

0:15:50.000 --> 0:15:52.960
<v Speaker 2>but it's nice to hear it. Yeah, So good luck,

0:15:53.000 --> 0:15:55.360
<v Speaker 2>you're gonna be You're gonna be good and strong and

0:15:55.880 --> 0:15:58.080
<v Speaker 2>six weeks when you have the rest of your life.

0:15:58.600 --> 0:16:00.920
<v Speaker 1>That's a drop in the buckets.

0:16:02.040 --> 0:16:05.400
<v Speaker 3>From Brianna. She says, I need help. There's a coworker

0:16:05.440 --> 0:16:08.560
<v Speaker 3>in the IT department that I'm crushing on. I am

0:16:08.600 --> 0:16:11.760
<v Speaker 3>the HR manager. We don't have a written policy about

0:16:11.800 --> 0:16:14.560
<v Speaker 3>not dating coworkers, but on the organizational chart, I would

0:16:14.560 --> 0:16:16.000
<v Speaker 3>be considered his superior.

0:16:16.160 --> 0:16:16.320
<v Speaker 1>Oh.

0:16:16.800 --> 0:16:18.840
<v Speaker 3>He's very professional, so I don't think he'd ever go

0:16:18.920 --> 0:16:20.280
<v Speaker 3>out of the way to blur the line if he

0:16:20.360 --> 0:16:21.920
<v Speaker 3>was interested in me. But I feel like I've been

0:16:21.960 --> 0:16:24.720
<v Speaker 3>dropping handkerchief to nudge him in my direction, and I'm

0:16:24.760 --> 0:16:27.640
<v Speaker 3>at a loss. I haven't pulled a Tanya and brought

0:16:27.680 --> 0:16:30.680
<v Speaker 3>in blueberries for National Blueberry Day because we've talked about

0:16:30.720 --> 0:16:33.640
<v Speaker 3>it being his favorite fruit. Oh no, do I push

0:16:33.720 --> 0:16:36.520
<v Speaker 3>the gas and go for it or pump the brakes?

0:16:37.280 --> 0:16:41.480
<v Speaker 2>That is so cute, and there is a National Blueberry Day.

0:16:41.520 --> 0:16:43.640
<v Speaker 3>They're so high in antioxidants.

0:16:44.240 --> 0:16:47.680
<v Speaker 1>It's a great, thoughtful superfood, honestly, but.

0:16:50.560 --> 0:16:51.800
<v Speaker 2>It's a super food.

0:16:52.080 --> 0:16:52.280
<v Speaker 3>Yeah.

0:16:52.360 --> 0:16:56.240
<v Speaker 5>And it's a superfood, yeah yeah, but that is very

0:16:56.320 --> 0:16:58.560
<v Speaker 5>It's a blueberry and it's a blueberry, yeah.

0:16:58.440 --> 0:17:00.120
<v Speaker 3>Exactly, it.

0:17:04.840 --> 0:17:06.320
<v Speaker 2>Berry and it's a blueberry.

0:17:06.480 --> 0:17:06.680
<v Speaker 1>Yeah.

0:17:06.760 --> 0:17:10.960
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, But what's a super food versus super It's a

0:17:11.000 --> 0:17:13.199
<v Speaker 2>great food and it's a superfood.

0:17:15.680 --> 0:17:19.760
<v Speaker 4>Super food when word being you now and super adjective space.

0:17:19.640 --> 0:17:23.320
<v Speaker 2>Food, Like it's a super food. It's in the category

0:17:23.359 --> 0:17:25.840
<v Speaker 2>of like super foods. Yeah, it's also a super food.

0:17:27.320 --> 0:17:29.560
<v Speaker 1>What does the name have to do is.

0:17:29.560 --> 0:17:40.520
<v Speaker 4>A great lake and it's a great lake. Yeah, here's

0:17:40.560 --> 0:17:43.399
<v Speaker 4>one for you. A grapefruit is not a grape fruit.

0:17:43.880 --> 0:17:47.280
<v Speaker 2>Oh, but it's a great fruit, right right, right, right right? Yeah?

0:17:47.640 --> 0:17:49.600
<v Speaker 1>How do these have anything to do with each other?

0:17:50.000 --> 0:17:52.440
<v Speaker 1>What's a super food versus a super food?

0:17:52.760 --> 0:17:53.320
<v Speaker 2>You said it?

0:17:54.359 --> 0:17:57.320
<v Speaker 3>Superfood is a nutrient rich food kind official for health

0:17:57.359 --> 0:17:57.840
<v Speaker 3>and well being?

0:17:57.960 --> 0:17:59.160
<v Speaker 1>And what's a super food?

0:17:59.440 --> 0:17:59.680
<v Speaker 2>Great?

0:18:01.359 --> 0:18:02.520
<v Speaker 3>So super.

0:18:03.920 --> 0:18:05.639
<v Speaker 2>Bloomberry is not super food.

0:18:06.119 --> 0:18:08.880
<v Speaker 1>It's a superfood. I wouldn't say it's super food.

0:18:11.000 --> 0:18:12.280
<v Speaker 2>That's an opinion for sure.

0:18:12.480 --> 0:18:13.200
<v Speaker 3>It's injective.

0:18:13.320 --> 0:18:14.920
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, so it's not like Michigan.

0:18:18.960 --> 0:18:20.560
<v Speaker 2>It's a great leg, but it is a great late

0:18:21.680 --> 0:18:22.360
<v Speaker 2>but that's a fact.

0:18:22.640 --> 0:18:22.800
<v Speaker 3>Yeah.

0:18:24.480 --> 0:18:26.640
<v Speaker 1>Oh my god, back to you, Brianna.

0:18:30.760 --> 0:18:34.840
<v Speaker 2>Okay, okay, this feels she's giving Tanya energy.

0:18:35.000 --> 0:18:38.879
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, Kayler energy, and I don't like it. Oh no, yeah, Tanya,

0:18:38.960 --> 0:18:40.520
<v Speaker 1>Kaylor I know, I know, I know, I know.

0:18:40.880 --> 0:18:42.639
<v Speaker 2>Why do you think he's not into her? No?

0:18:42.760 --> 0:18:44.399
<v Speaker 1>I don't think he's not into her. But like I

0:18:44.800 --> 0:18:46.920
<v Speaker 1>did this all the time. I sent him what's his nuts?

0:18:46.960 --> 0:18:48.880
<v Speaker 2>Oh my gosh, it makes me so sad. I can't

0:18:48.920 --> 0:18:50.919
<v Speaker 2>even think about this. It made me like a.

0:18:51.000 --> 0:18:53.960
<v Speaker 1>National Cookie Day, and like he didn't deserve for me

0:18:54.000 --> 0:18:54.879
<v Speaker 1>to send him cookies.

0:18:55.000 --> 0:18:56.720
<v Speaker 2>This guy and they made out one night. He was

0:18:56.800 --> 0:18:59.399
<v Speaker 2>like JoJo's brother's friend came in town and they like

0:18:59.520 --> 0:19:00.240
<v Speaker 2>had a great night.

0:19:00.280 --> 0:19:01.679
<v Speaker 1>We all went out to marry him.

0:19:01.720 --> 0:19:04.639
<v Speaker 2>And then she sent him cookies and I was like, no, I.

0:19:04.680 --> 0:19:07.119
<v Speaker 1>Was like national cookie. Did he like loved chocolate cookies.

0:19:07.160 --> 0:19:08.680
<v Speaker 1>I'm like, I'm just one of the best chocolate chip

0:19:08.720 --> 0:19:13.440
<v Speaker 1>cookies in Los Angeles? And I did and it went nowhere.

0:19:13.680 --> 0:19:17.399
<v Speaker 1>And No, I sent him milk. I think it was

0:19:17.440 --> 0:19:18.600
<v Speaker 1>like milk jar or something.

0:19:19.080 --> 0:19:19.399
<v Speaker 3>I don't know.

0:19:19.480 --> 0:19:20.800
<v Speaker 4>At the time, he did not deserve that.

0:19:21.040 --> 0:19:22.760
<v Speaker 1>He did not deserve that, And so like, I don't

0:19:22.760 --> 0:19:25.240
<v Speaker 1>know if this guy deserves your blueberries. You're super busy.

0:19:27.320 --> 0:19:30.720
<v Speaker 1>I just I don't like it because you're saying that

0:19:30.840 --> 0:19:33.720
<v Speaker 1>he doesn't like to blur the lines, and so I

0:19:33.800 --> 0:19:35.560
<v Speaker 1>don't want you to like put yourself.

0:19:35.240 --> 0:19:37.840
<v Speaker 3>Out there, but I don't. I think you're right. I don't.

0:19:37.840 --> 0:19:40.840
<v Speaker 3>I don't think this is going to work. Yeah, but

0:19:40.960 --> 0:19:42.320
<v Speaker 3>I'm in with the heart wants what it wants, and

0:19:42.320 --> 0:19:43.800
<v Speaker 3>shouldn't she go for it? I don't know, but I

0:19:43.840 --> 0:19:45.879
<v Speaker 3>feel like this is not This feels wrong to me.

0:19:46.040 --> 0:19:47.479
<v Speaker 3>This feels like it's not going to end well.

0:19:47.640 --> 0:19:51.400
<v Speaker 4>I think he's also probably apprehensive of engaging because they worked,

0:19:51.720 --> 0:19:52.320
<v Speaker 4>they were together.

0:19:52.560 --> 0:19:53.960
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, I mean that never stopped me.

0:19:55.040 --> 0:19:58.439
<v Speaker 4>You're in any case you are every way.

0:19:58.520 --> 0:20:00.239
<v Speaker 1>And not case too.

0:20:08.160 --> 0:20:13.960
<v Speaker 2>But here's the thing. You know, if someone's interested like you,

0:20:14.200 --> 0:20:14.439
<v Speaker 2>you know.

0:20:14.960 --> 0:20:17.960
<v Speaker 1>Not really, I mean that they're not.

0:20:20.160 --> 0:20:22.160
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, again, you're not the best person.

0:20:22.880 --> 0:20:25.240
<v Speaker 2>I feel like you can get a vibe if someone's interested,

0:20:25.280 --> 0:20:27.080
<v Speaker 2>even if it's in a work setting and everyone's trying

0:20:27.080 --> 0:20:29.600
<v Speaker 2>to be professional, you can tell if someone's interested.

0:20:29.720 --> 0:20:30.080
<v Speaker 1>Totally.

0:20:31.040 --> 0:20:32.080
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, right, totally.

0:20:33.920 --> 0:20:35.760
<v Speaker 1>I don't relate to that.

0:20:35.920 --> 0:20:42.840
<v Speaker 2>Okay, okay, maybe you can't tell. See my my gut

0:20:43.000 --> 0:20:47.640
<v Speaker 2>is saying, what if y'all through like a little uh,

0:20:49.240 --> 0:20:53.240
<v Speaker 2>like a little at a group per mixer, company mixer,

0:20:53.400 --> 0:20:57.159
<v Speaker 2>a company mixer, like an end of summer bash, and

0:20:57.480 --> 0:20:59.880
<v Speaker 2>y'all go, I don't know, to a bar, I don't

0:21:00.520 --> 0:21:03.240
<v Speaker 2>where you live, Yeah, to bar somewhere that's sociable and

0:21:03.400 --> 0:21:06.120
<v Speaker 2>like comfortable, and see what the vibe is and if

0:21:06.160 --> 0:21:09.639
<v Speaker 2>you feel like there's some flirty behavior, I said, go

0:21:09.760 --> 0:21:10.000
<v Speaker 2>for it.

0:21:10.280 --> 0:21:11.960
<v Speaker 1>If you know how old you are. But if you

0:21:12.000 --> 0:21:14.560
<v Speaker 1>can get him to take a shot with you, you know,

0:21:14.640 --> 0:21:18.400
<v Speaker 1>it's game on. I'm just saying, if you do drink,

0:21:18.440 --> 0:21:19.800
<v Speaker 1>if you're of age, and that's what you would like

0:21:19.880 --> 0:21:21.920
<v Speaker 1>to enjoy on your weekends, if you can get him,

0:21:22.080 --> 0:21:24.160
<v Speaker 1>like any guy I could get to take a shot

0:21:24.200 --> 0:21:25.960
<v Speaker 1>with me, I knew, was like game.

0:21:28.160 --> 0:21:32.359
<v Speaker 2>I think that's loose advice. Really yeah, I think people

0:21:32.440 --> 0:21:42.560
<v Speaker 2>like free alcohol so dark, okay. I would have something

0:21:42.600 --> 0:21:44.840
<v Speaker 2>a group setting where you see each other outside of

0:21:44.880 --> 0:21:48.040
<v Speaker 2>a work setting, see if the vibe is there, if

0:21:48.040 --> 0:21:50.440
<v Speaker 2>it's flirty, if you're even still into him outside of

0:21:50.480 --> 0:21:53.080
<v Speaker 2>a work dynamic, and then I think you just kind

0:21:53.119 --> 0:21:54.920
<v Speaker 2>of flirt and see if you get anything back, and

0:21:55.000 --> 0:21:56.439
<v Speaker 2>if you don't move.

0:21:56.359 --> 0:22:03.439
<v Speaker 3>On, haven't fired. I can't murder reassigned him to Siberia.

0:22:04.200 --> 0:22:06.280
<v Speaker 3>I say, pumped the brakes unless you get some real

0:22:06.320 --> 0:22:07.520
<v Speaker 3>evidence that he's interested back.

0:22:07.680 --> 0:22:08.640
<v Speaker 2>What's real evidence?

0:22:09.240 --> 0:22:09.359
<v Speaker 1>Uh?

0:22:09.960 --> 0:22:13.320
<v Speaker 3>You got in blueberries? Maybe National Rubarb Day is coming up.

0:22:13.400 --> 0:22:16.200
<v Speaker 3>He'll get you some rubarb pie. That would be evidence.

0:22:16.640 --> 0:22:19.040
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, so if he returned the favor, I think if he.

0:22:19.040 --> 0:22:21.160
<v Speaker 3>Returned to the favor, that's a positive sign. Or even

0:22:21.240 --> 0:22:25.360
<v Speaker 3>anything a lingering touch, you know, like there's something eye contact.

0:22:25.440 --> 0:22:27.440
<v Speaker 3>Eye contact is good contact.

0:22:27.920 --> 0:22:28.960
<v Speaker 1>A lot of eye contacts.

0:22:33.800 --> 0:22:39.719
<v Speaker 3>You actually feel assaulted from Ty's eye contact, exactly. Heartbroken

0:22:39.760 --> 0:22:43.160
<v Speaker 3>anonymous scrubber. My boyfriend and I dated for nine months.

0:22:43.200 --> 0:22:45.639
<v Speaker 3>We broke up in January. I felt he was the

0:22:45.720 --> 0:22:47.480
<v Speaker 3>one I was supposed to marry. He was everything I

0:22:47.600 --> 0:22:50.960
<v Speaker 3>prayed for. The breakup was unexpected, no cause, no arguments.

0:22:51.000 --> 0:22:53.000
<v Speaker 3>He started pulling away over the holidays. We broke up

0:22:53.040 --> 0:22:55.680
<v Speaker 3>a couple of weeks after he got back. The breakup

0:22:55.800 --> 0:22:57.840
<v Speaker 3>was emotional for both of us. We cried and held

0:22:57.840 --> 0:22:59.919
<v Speaker 3>each other. He felt he failed and leading a godly

0:23:00.160 --> 0:23:03.119
<v Speaker 3>relationship and wanted to focus on his goals. He mentioned

0:23:03.119 --> 0:23:04.960
<v Speaker 3>that who knows, maybe we'll get back together one day.

0:23:06.040 --> 0:23:08.119
<v Speaker 3>We've continued to talk a couple times months each other.

0:23:08.160 --> 0:23:09.960
<v Speaker 3>Once a month left time we met. It felt like

0:23:10.040 --> 0:23:12.640
<v Speaker 3>we never broke up. We kiss each time we see

0:23:12.640 --> 0:23:15.000
<v Speaker 3>each other. He knew I thought we would get married,

0:23:15.040 --> 0:23:17.400
<v Speaker 3>but he wasn't there yet. While we were dating. Recently,

0:23:17.400 --> 0:23:19.399
<v Speaker 3>he said he's getting closer to wanting to get back together.

0:23:19.520 --> 0:23:21.359
<v Speaker 3>He suggested that if we did get back together, we

0:23:21.400 --> 0:23:24.640
<v Speaker 3>would marry. In three months. He referenced Ross and Rachel

0:23:24.680 --> 0:23:26.880
<v Speaker 3>and implied we might get married, saying to give it time.

0:23:27.000 --> 0:23:29.639
<v Speaker 3>Do you think there's a chance we could get back together? Tanya?

0:23:29.960 --> 0:23:32.600
<v Speaker 3>How did you stay patient and hopeful with Robbie when

0:23:32.600 --> 0:23:36.160
<v Speaker 3>you knew he was the one? Thanks for your insight, Well,

0:23:36.240 --> 0:23:36.480
<v Speaker 3>have you.

0:23:36.600 --> 0:23:44.600
<v Speaker 1>Tried posting pictures? So no, First of all, I'm so sorry.

0:23:44.840 --> 0:23:48.199
<v Speaker 1>That is like the worst thing ever when you are

0:23:48.280 --> 0:23:50.680
<v Speaker 1>broken up with and you feel like that person is

0:23:50.760 --> 0:23:53.800
<v Speaker 1>your person, there's no worse pain. So I'm sorry you're

0:23:53.800 --> 0:23:58.560
<v Speaker 1>going through that. I feel like in my situation, we

0:23:58.680 --> 0:24:00.920
<v Speaker 1>broke up around the holidays as well well, and that

0:24:01.119 --> 0:24:03.639
<v Speaker 1>was so dark because it was the holidays and I

0:24:03.760 --> 0:24:06.280
<v Speaker 1>was spending them alone. And then I remember my parents

0:24:06.320 --> 0:24:09.639
<v Speaker 1>both got COVID and so I was really alone and

0:24:09.800 --> 0:24:13.880
<v Speaker 1>it was such a dark time. But I still knew

0:24:13.920 --> 0:24:15.960
<v Speaker 1>he was the one, Like I remember when we broke up,

0:24:16.000 --> 0:24:18.520
<v Speaker 1>I was just like, this doesn't make sense, Like it

0:24:18.640 --> 0:24:22.520
<v Speaker 1>just doesn't make sense. It doesn't feel right, And I

0:24:22.600 --> 0:24:24.200
<v Speaker 1>think you kind of have to get to a place

0:24:24.400 --> 0:24:27.600
<v Speaker 1>where you keep a hopeful hard because I always felt

0:24:27.720 --> 0:24:31.720
<v Speaker 1>like we would get back together, but also have the

0:24:31.800 --> 0:24:34.440
<v Speaker 1>reality that it might not happen. And I think I

0:24:34.520 --> 0:24:36.800
<v Speaker 1>got to that point. I think once I cause we

0:24:36.920 --> 0:24:39.359
<v Speaker 1>two for the first i'd say month, month and a

0:24:39.400 --> 0:24:42.080
<v Speaker 1>half of our breakup, we still saw each other. We

0:24:42.160 --> 0:24:46.600
<v Speaker 1>would hug and kiss and like do all that. And

0:24:46.920 --> 0:24:50.200
<v Speaker 1>after a month and a half, yeah, like into January,

0:24:50.680 --> 0:24:52.880
<v Speaker 1>we still would like not often, we weren't like seeing

0:24:52.880 --> 0:24:55.040
<v Speaker 1>each other every day, but I saw him like once

0:24:55.160 --> 0:24:57.800
<v Speaker 1>or twice we still talked, Like on New Year's we talked.

0:25:00.080 --> 0:25:03.160
<v Speaker 1>I saw him in January we kissed. Uh. And then

0:25:03.440 --> 0:25:05.080
<v Speaker 1>at that point I just cut it off. I was like,

0:25:05.119 --> 0:25:07.280
<v Speaker 1>I can't do this. If we're like broken up and

0:25:07.760 --> 0:25:09.639
<v Speaker 1>that's what you want, then I really have to be

0:25:09.760 --> 0:25:12.480
<v Speaker 1>broken up. And that's when I started just cold turkeying it.

0:25:13.240 --> 0:25:15.040
<v Speaker 1>I didn't respond to any of his call I would

0:25:15.080 --> 0:25:17.360
<v Speaker 1>not answer his calls, I didn't respond to his dms.

0:25:17.600 --> 0:25:20.000
<v Speaker 1>Like I was just cold turkey because that's the way

0:25:20.040 --> 0:25:25.640
<v Speaker 1>that I had to move on process it. And then eventually, again,

0:25:25.680 --> 0:25:27.639
<v Speaker 1>like Beck always says, whatever's meant to be will be,

0:25:27.840 --> 0:25:31.960
<v Speaker 1>and then we ended up talking and we had a

0:25:32.119 --> 0:25:34.520
<v Speaker 1>really big fight before we got back together, and then

0:25:35.400 --> 0:25:36.800
<v Speaker 1>when then we got back together.

0:25:37.800 --> 0:25:40.560
<v Speaker 2>I feel like he's trying to have his cake and

0:25:40.680 --> 0:25:42.800
<v Speaker 2>eat it too. I feel like he has his cake

0:25:42.880 --> 0:25:45.480
<v Speaker 2>and he's eating it too because he wanted the breakup,

0:25:45.920 --> 0:25:47.840
<v Speaker 2>But then he's also getting to see you when he

0:25:47.960 --> 0:25:49.920
<v Speaker 2>wants to see you, and kiss you when he wants

0:25:49.960 --> 0:25:50.520
<v Speaker 2>to kiss you.

0:25:50.640 --> 0:25:53.000
<v Speaker 1>The same advice you gave me when this was happening

0:25:53.040 --> 0:25:54.480
<v Speaker 1>with Robbie, what he has.

0:25:54.920 --> 0:25:59.800
<v Speaker 2>Wants because I was like, you ended this, so leave

0:25:59.840 --> 0:26:00.720
<v Speaker 2>her alone. Leave me?

0:26:00.920 --> 0:26:02.639
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, yeah, leave her alone.

0:26:02.680 --> 0:26:03.520
<v Speaker 3>Love me, Robbie. I do.

0:26:03.680 --> 0:26:04.320
<v Speaker 1>I love Robbie.

0:26:04.320 --> 0:26:06.280
<v Speaker 2>I'm so happy I'm coming together. But in the moment,

0:26:06.359 --> 0:26:07.560
<v Speaker 2>I was like, leave her alone.

0:26:07.720 --> 0:26:07.920
<v Speaker 1>Yeah.

0:26:08.600 --> 0:26:10.760
<v Speaker 2>And that's how I feel because I feel like what's

0:26:10.800 --> 0:26:14.560
<v Speaker 2>happening is that if he is not there, and he's

0:26:14.840 --> 0:26:17.760
<v Speaker 2>if he doesn't see a genuine future with you, then

0:26:17.960 --> 0:26:20.600
<v Speaker 2>he is keeping you in a place of heartbreak and

0:26:21.400 --> 0:26:23.639
<v Speaker 2>a place of not being able to move on. And

0:26:23.760 --> 0:26:25.920
<v Speaker 2>I think it's a very selfish move. And I also

0:26:26.520 --> 0:26:29.120
<v Speaker 2>I come from like the religion world of like God

0:26:29.240 --> 0:26:30.920
<v Speaker 2>told me we're not supposed to be together, and it

0:26:31.080 --> 0:26:34.000
<v Speaker 2>is like my biggest ick. I'm sorry, I just do

0:26:34.160 --> 0:26:37.080
<v Speaker 2>not like it. I think it's such a cop out

0:26:37.480 --> 0:26:40.280
<v Speaker 2>and what he's doing is not godly to me, because

0:26:40.320 --> 0:26:42.920
<v Speaker 2>if he really loved you and loved what God was

0:26:42.960 --> 0:26:44.720
<v Speaker 2>telling him to do, he would let you move on,

0:26:45.080 --> 0:26:46.480
<v Speaker 2>or he would say, hey, I want to be with

0:26:46.600 --> 0:26:49.200
<v Speaker 2>you and be a man and be a partner to you.

0:26:49.600 --> 0:26:51.359
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, sounds like she needs to go cold Turkey.

0:26:52.280 --> 0:26:54.280
<v Speaker 2>I think you go cold Turkey because I think that

0:26:54.440 --> 0:26:56.560
<v Speaker 2>if you're meant to be, it'll happen. But I think

0:26:56.680 --> 0:27:00.760
<v Speaker 2>you give yourself a chance to move one from him.

0:27:00.960 --> 0:27:03.399
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, because I remember when I was cold Turkey, I

0:27:03.560 --> 0:27:05.920
<v Speaker 1>did somebody. Somebody did try to set me up with

0:27:06.000 --> 0:27:07.639
<v Speaker 1>someone and I did accept the date. It was like,

0:27:07.760 --> 0:27:10.200
<v Speaker 1>I think it was still kind of covidy times. We

0:27:10.240 --> 0:27:13.320
<v Speaker 1>did a FaceTime date. But the funny part is is

0:27:13.800 --> 0:27:15.600
<v Speaker 1>this date that I had with this guy, we end

0:27:15.720 --> 0:27:19.879
<v Speaker 1>up both talking about our exes the entire FaceTime. He

0:27:20.000 --> 0:27:22.280
<v Speaker 1>was talking about his ex girlfriend. I was talking about Robbie.

0:27:22.760 --> 0:27:25.520
<v Speaker 1>And we followed each other on Instagram and we still

0:27:25.560 --> 0:27:27.320
<v Speaker 1>follow each other. He ended up getting back with his

0:27:27.480 --> 0:27:30.359
<v Speaker 1>ex girlfriend. He is now married to her with a baby,

0:27:30.960 --> 0:27:33.440
<v Speaker 1>and I ended up getting back with Robbie, we are engaged,

0:27:33.520 --> 0:27:35.800
<v Speaker 1>and so it's just very very funny. But like I

0:27:35.960 --> 0:27:38.040
<v Speaker 1>was open to it, Like I was like, yeah, let's

0:27:38.080 --> 0:27:39.600
<v Speaker 1>like have a FaceTime date. And we were chatting for

0:27:39.640 --> 0:27:40.320
<v Speaker 1>a couple of days.

0:27:40.440 --> 0:27:43.240
<v Speaker 2>But yeah, it just well, that's what I'm saying. I

0:27:43.440 --> 0:27:45.359
<v Speaker 2>don't I'm not saying you're never going to get back together.

0:27:45.400 --> 0:27:48.000
<v Speaker 2>I just think that he's getting way too much out

0:27:48.040 --> 0:27:50.080
<v Speaker 2>of this breakup and you're the one who's hurting.

0:27:50.359 --> 0:27:52.840
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, so you might have to cald Turkey it. I

0:27:52.920 --> 0:27:53.399
<v Speaker 1>hate to say it.

0:27:54.840 --> 0:27:59.200
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, and you'll never regret focusing on yourself and living

0:27:59.280 --> 0:27:59.760
<v Speaker 3>your life.

0:28:00.080 --> 0:28:00.240
<v Speaker 1>Yep.

0:28:00.320 --> 0:28:02.560
<v Speaker 3>You got to move on. And if you end up

0:28:02.600 --> 0:28:05.600
<v Speaker 3>together one day, glorious. But if you count on that,

0:28:05.760 --> 0:28:07.920
<v Speaker 3>you're only going to stay stagnant.

0:28:07.960 --> 0:28:09.760
<v Speaker 1>You're not going to And I'm not going to encourage

0:28:09.800 --> 0:28:11.879
<v Speaker 1>playing games because I don't think it's like a game.

0:28:12.240 --> 0:28:15.159
<v Speaker 1>But I know in our situation, because I went so

0:28:15.359 --> 0:28:17.920
<v Speaker 1>cold Turkey and Robbie, he thought that I had moved

0:28:17.960 --> 0:28:21.760
<v Speaker 1>on and that he lost me forever and that freaked

0:28:21.800 --> 0:28:22.120
<v Speaker 1>him back.

0:28:22.119 --> 0:28:25.639
<v Speaker 3>That's jarring. Absolutely thinks he's going to marry you in

0:28:25.720 --> 0:28:27.600
<v Speaker 3>three months if you get back together. First of all,

0:28:27.640 --> 0:28:29.840
<v Speaker 3>that's other all bs, or he really believes it. But

0:28:29.920 --> 0:28:32.560
<v Speaker 3>either way, you're better off focusing on you and moving on.

0:28:32.840 --> 0:28:34.920
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, and I don't think you should get married after

0:28:34.960 --> 0:28:37.520
<v Speaker 2>three months, even if you'll, even if you disregard our

0:28:37.560 --> 0:28:39.480
<v Speaker 2>advice and get back together with him, I would say,

0:28:39.560 --> 0:28:40.160
<v Speaker 2>don't do that.

0:28:40.720 --> 0:28:42.360
<v Speaker 3>Red flags plenty right here.

0:28:42.440 --> 0:28:47.080
<v Speaker 1>Yeaheah, well, not necessarily, not necessarily.

0:28:47.880 --> 0:28:54.280
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, from the information we're sing, I think you focus

0:28:54.360 --> 0:28:54.840
<v Speaker 2>on yourself.

0:28:55.440 --> 0:28:57.880
<v Speaker 3>I agree, you'll never regret doing that, and you're better.

0:28:58.000 --> 0:29:00.480
<v Speaker 2>You're better than being at his beck and cal whenever

0:29:00.560 --> 0:29:02.440
<v Speaker 2>he decides he's lonely and wants to see you and

0:29:02.520 --> 0:29:02.840
<v Speaker 2>kiss you.

0:29:03.000 --> 0:29:06.520
<v Speaker 3>That's not okay. Preach from anonymous. My husband and I

0:29:06.520 --> 0:29:08.479
<v Speaker 3>have been married fifteen years. We've got three kids. He's

0:29:08.480 --> 0:29:11.240
<v Speaker 3>a great husband, he's a great dad, but we struggled

0:29:11.240 --> 0:29:14.360
<v Speaker 3>for years with him having a porn addiction. I get it,

0:29:14.440 --> 0:29:16.160
<v Speaker 3>guys look at porn from time to time, even though

0:29:16.160 --> 0:29:18.200
<v Speaker 3>I don't love it. But I have found him so

0:29:18.320 --> 0:29:20.400
<v Speaker 3>many times in our home with the kids in the

0:29:20.480 --> 0:29:22.960
<v Speaker 3>next room on our family iPad, and I'm so tired

0:29:23.000 --> 0:29:26.160
<v Speaker 3>of fighting this battle with him. He agrees it's a problem,

0:29:26.240 --> 0:29:28.160
<v Speaker 3>then it'll stop for weeks and then later I'll find

0:29:28.160 --> 0:29:29.760
<v Speaker 3>it again. I love him so much. I don't want

0:29:29.800 --> 0:29:32.120
<v Speaker 3>it to rip our family apart, but I feel so disrespected.

0:29:32.600 --> 0:29:34.640
<v Speaker 3>We are going to start therapy together next week try

0:29:34.680 --> 0:29:36.560
<v Speaker 3>to work through this, but honestly, I'm afraid our problems

0:29:36.600 --> 0:29:39.120
<v Speaker 3>have gone past the porn and now into him not

0:29:39.200 --> 0:29:42.200
<v Speaker 3>respecting me enough to stop. Any advice you can give

0:29:42.280 --> 0:29:45.800
<v Speaker 3>me I would greatly appreciate, especially Mark and Easton's mail perspectives.

0:29:46.240 --> 0:29:51.280
<v Speaker 3>Oh oh nice. I mean, look, yes, it is a

0:29:51.360 --> 0:29:54.480
<v Speaker 3>respect issue. It's not. I mean I shouldn't be so

0:29:54.640 --> 0:29:57.840
<v Speaker 3>cavalier about actual porn addiction, sex addiction. These are things

0:29:57.880 --> 0:30:00.800
<v Speaker 3>that I am not terribly familiar with, understand very much.

0:30:00.880 --> 0:30:03.320
<v Speaker 3>So I don't want to be dismissive of those things, right.

0:30:03.240 --> 0:30:05.600
<v Speaker 1>Because I'm curious when she says porn addiction, because I

0:30:05.680 --> 0:30:10.560
<v Speaker 1>feel like there's a difference between what makes it porn addiction.

0:30:12.680 --> 0:30:13.600
<v Speaker 4>Using the family iPad?

0:30:13.720 --> 0:30:18.240
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, yeah, do sound like signs. But let's say it wasn't.

0:30:18.320 --> 0:30:20.520
<v Speaker 3>Let's say it was alcohol. Would you say he doesn't

0:30:20.560 --> 0:30:22.480
<v Speaker 3>respect me enough to quit alcohol? So if it's a

0:30:22.600 --> 0:30:25.880
<v Speaker 3>legitimate addition addiction, then I think we need to have

0:30:26.040 --> 0:30:28.200
<v Speaker 3>some patients and go through the process, and therapy is

0:30:28.200 --> 0:30:30.640
<v Speaker 3>the right thing, right, But if you don't feel like

0:30:30.720 --> 0:30:33.400
<v Speaker 3>it's an actual addiction, which you would know better than we,

0:30:34.720 --> 0:30:36.960
<v Speaker 3>then then yeah, then it sounds like a respect issue

0:30:37.040 --> 0:30:40.160
<v Speaker 3>and he needs to understand where your boundaries are because

0:30:40.240 --> 0:30:42.720
<v Speaker 3>there is no right and wrong in relationships. It's respecting

0:30:42.760 --> 0:30:45.040
<v Speaker 3>the other person's wishes for what is right and wrong

0:30:45.120 --> 0:30:45.880
<v Speaker 3>in a relationship.

0:30:48.480 --> 0:30:52.200
<v Speaker 4>I agree completely, But they say addiction is when you

0:30:52.640 --> 0:30:55.680
<v Speaker 4>continue the behavior in the face of like severe consequences

0:30:55.840 --> 0:30:58.200
<v Speaker 4>or something like you you get drunk at work or like,

0:30:58.320 --> 0:31:01.200
<v Speaker 4>you know, you drive drunk, something like that. And I

0:31:01.360 --> 0:31:04.000
<v Speaker 4>think that he's again I don't know too much about

0:31:04.000 --> 0:31:06.840
<v Speaker 4>it either, but I think that it probably fits the bill.

0:31:06.960 --> 0:31:08.800
<v Speaker 4>And she probably said like, hey, if you keep doing this,

0:31:09.080 --> 0:31:12.640
<v Speaker 4>I'm gonna leave. Maybe maybe she said that, and that

0:31:12.720 --> 0:31:15.120
<v Speaker 4>on some level, yeah, that he keeps doing it, keeps

0:31:15.120 --> 0:31:16.760
<v Speaker 4>doing to try probably trying to hide it from her,

0:31:18.200 --> 0:31:20.800
<v Speaker 4>And uh, I don't know that that needs to be addressed.

0:31:20.800 --> 0:31:23.240
<v Speaker 4>That's that's you know, I'm not saying porn is bad,

0:31:24.320 --> 0:31:27.000
<v Speaker 4>but like, I don't know if he if this is

0:31:27.040 --> 0:31:31.880
<v Speaker 4>like really affecting their intimacy, affecting his personal life, like

0:31:32.040 --> 0:31:33.400
<v Speaker 4>is he like that's.

0:31:33.200 --> 0:31:35.520
<v Speaker 1>The whole thing. Like I think you have to take

0:31:35.760 --> 0:31:38.080
<v Speaker 1>take like a what's it called bird's eye. I've had many,

0:31:38.520 --> 0:31:43.720
<v Speaker 1>weirdly many conversations with men about porn. I was like

0:31:43.880 --> 0:31:47.080
<v Speaker 1>very into this topic. I don't remember when, but maybe

0:31:47.160 --> 0:31:48.000
<v Speaker 1>like ten years ago it.

0:31:48.040 --> 0:31:49.800
<v Speaker 3>Was in your porn era it was porn Area.

0:31:50.000 --> 0:31:53.160
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, we will because I'm fascinated with like why men

0:31:53.320 --> 0:31:56.960
<v Speaker 1>like why women are like not or maybe I shouldn't generalize,

0:31:57.160 --> 0:31:59.400
<v Speaker 1>but that's true. Yeah, I feel like it doesn't do

0:31:59.560 --> 0:32:01.480
<v Speaker 1>for women what it does for men, Like why, I

0:32:01.560 --> 0:32:04.000
<v Speaker 1>don't know. I just feel like men just do like

0:32:04.120 --> 0:32:04.960
<v Speaker 1>it for some reason.

0:32:05.360 --> 0:32:06.840
<v Speaker 3>Men are much more visual than women.

0:32:07.160 --> 0:32:12.040
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, whatever. But so what I've gathered is if it's

0:32:12.080 --> 0:32:16.080
<v Speaker 1>something that is impacting your sex life with your husband,

0:32:16.680 --> 0:32:19.120
<v Speaker 1>then it's definitely something that he needs to take into

0:32:19.120 --> 0:32:22.880
<v Speaker 1>account and he should, you know, respect your wishes. If

0:32:22.920 --> 0:32:26.400
<v Speaker 1>it's if he's doing it on the family iPads and

0:32:26.520 --> 0:32:28.520
<v Speaker 1>the kids can see it or hear it or whatever, like,

0:32:28.680 --> 0:32:32.280
<v Speaker 1>that's also a major problem. If it's something that he's

0:32:32.400 --> 0:32:34.560
<v Speaker 1>doing that he does from time to time that's not

0:32:34.680 --> 0:32:38.120
<v Speaker 1>affecting your kids, your sex life, anything like that, it's

0:32:38.280 --> 0:32:40.440
<v Speaker 1>it's like golfing or something, you know, something that he

0:32:40.600 --> 0:32:43.160
<v Speaker 1>likes to do or whatever. If you don't like it,

0:32:43.320 --> 0:32:45.360
<v Speaker 1>you just have to just like everyone's going to have

0:32:45.440 --> 0:32:47.200
<v Speaker 1>some of those things that you don't like. But I

0:32:47.280 --> 0:32:49.360
<v Speaker 1>think if it's affecting your kids, your family, and your

0:32:49.440 --> 0:32:51.760
<v Speaker 1>sex life, then you have to set boundaries and you

0:32:51.840 --> 0:32:52.840
<v Speaker 1>have to like figure that out.

0:32:53.960 --> 0:32:56.480
<v Speaker 2>I'm just really I mean, I feel hopeful that y'all

0:32:56.520 --> 0:32:58.360
<v Speaker 2>are going to therapy because a lot of people if

0:32:58.440 --> 0:33:01.520
<v Speaker 2>he was like, I'm not going to therapy, I don't

0:33:01.560 --> 0:33:03.680
<v Speaker 2>need therapy, then I would be like, I don't really

0:33:03.800 --> 0:33:05.720
<v Speaker 2>know what to say to encourage you. But I do

0:33:05.880 --> 0:33:08.720
<v Speaker 2>feel like there could be I think him the willingness

0:33:08.920 --> 0:33:12.040
<v Speaker 2>to go and like have these conversations with a professional

0:33:12.600 --> 0:33:15.080
<v Speaker 2>I think will be very helpful. And I think you'll

0:33:15.120 --> 0:33:20.400
<v Speaker 2>also be able to express feelings in a safe setting

0:33:20.600 --> 0:33:22.720
<v Speaker 2>that maybe you haven't even been able to get through

0:33:22.760 --> 0:33:24.880
<v Speaker 2>to him about. And I think it'll be good for

0:33:25.320 --> 0:33:28.040
<v Speaker 2>your relationship in general. But I really, I really feel

0:33:28.120 --> 0:33:32.360
<v Speaker 2>for you because whether it's porn or alcohol or drugs, like,

0:33:32.400 --> 0:33:36.400
<v Speaker 2>addiction is a disease, and yeah, it overtakes people, and

0:33:36.480 --> 0:33:38.680
<v Speaker 2>I think it's I think you're at a point where

0:33:38.720 --> 0:33:39.440
<v Speaker 2>you're able to.

0:33:39.920 --> 0:33:44.320
<v Speaker 1>Hopefully and like when someone's off the especially your partner

0:33:44.360 --> 0:33:46.320
<v Speaker 1>in life, you don't want to just abandon them, you

0:33:46.400 --> 0:33:46.800
<v Speaker 1>know what I mean.

0:33:46.960 --> 0:33:48.960
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, but you also don't want to be disrespected for

0:33:49.000 --> 0:33:50.920
<v Speaker 2>the rest of your life. So you have to be

0:33:51.000 --> 0:33:55.040
<v Speaker 2>able to set that boundary and know that going into

0:33:55.120 --> 0:33:58.560
<v Speaker 2>therapy that you're doing everything you can and you can't

0:33:58.680 --> 0:34:01.920
<v Speaker 2>change him, right, you can't. You can't make him stop,

0:34:02.080 --> 0:34:04.960
<v Speaker 2>And that's the that's the part about control with your

0:34:05.000 --> 0:34:06.880
<v Speaker 2>partner that's really hard.

0:34:07.120 --> 0:34:07.320
<v Speaker 1>Yeah.

0:34:07.400 --> 0:34:09.560
<v Speaker 3>I think therapy really help you understand where he's coming

0:34:09.560 --> 0:34:11.480
<v Speaker 3>from and help him understand where you're coming from.

0:34:11.560 --> 0:34:11.960
<v Speaker 2>I agree.

0:34:12.080 --> 0:34:15.560
<v Speaker 3>Yes, Becca, it's time for a break. Can you do

0:34:15.719 --> 0:34:16.640
<v Speaker 3>the dusty honors?

0:34:16.760 --> 0:34:20.440
<v Speaker 2>My gosh? Well, we have one more email and then

0:34:20.719 --> 0:34:24.200
<v Speaker 2>who is most likely to superlative fun at the end

0:34:24.200 --> 0:34:26.040
<v Speaker 2>of the episode. But we're going to take a break,

0:34:26.080 --> 0:34:46.680
<v Speaker 2>so we'll be right back. All right, we are back.

0:34:46.800 --> 0:34:49.360
<v Speaker 2>We have one more email from anonymous.

0:34:50.680 --> 0:34:53.439
<v Speaker 3>All right, here we go. An email from anonymous. She says,

0:34:54.280 --> 0:34:56.680
<v Speaker 3>my friend of almost thirty years cheated on her husband.

0:34:57.480 --> 0:34:59.680
<v Speaker 3>My husband and I were very much friends with her husband.

0:34:59.680 --> 0:35:02.000
<v Speaker 3>We've been on trips with them, and back in April

0:35:02.080 --> 0:35:04.360
<v Speaker 3>of twenty three, my friend cheated on her husband with

0:35:04.440 --> 0:35:06.680
<v Speaker 3>one of my husband's friends who she met at our house.

0:35:07.520 --> 0:35:09.880
<v Speaker 3>My husband I knew about the affair and felt complicit

0:35:09.960 --> 0:35:12.240
<v Speaker 3>because we would continue to see her with her husband

0:35:12.560 --> 0:35:14.839
<v Speaker 3>and we continue to see her with the other guy.

0:35:15.600 --> 0:35:18.640
<v Speaker 3>My friend's marriage ended shortly thereafter once she found out

0:35:18.680 --> 0:35:20.839
<v Speaker 3>she was pregnant with the other man's baby, and now

0:35:20.880 --> 0:35:23.640
<v Speaker 3>she's divorced. But my friend and a new partner have

0:35:23.760 --> 0:35:26.480
<v Speaker 3>rewritten the timeline. They act like it wasn't an affair,

0:35:26.600 --> 0:35:29.359
<v Speaker 3>and their husband knew she wanted a divorce. And I've

0:35:29.360 --> 0:35:32.279
<v Speaker 3>struggled with this because we socialized with them as a

0:35:32.360 --> 0:35:34.919
<v Speaker 3>couple during the affair and I was her sounding board

0:35:35.000 --> 0:35:38.120
<v Speaker 3>during that time. Her new partner jokes about breaking up

0:35:38.200 --> 0:35:41.080
<v Speaker 3>marriages and getting with married women, which bothers me. He

0:35:41.239 --> 0:35:44.279
<v Speaker 3>previously cheated on his wife like a decade ago. I

0:35:44.280 --> 0:35:45.839
<v Speaker 3>don't know if we should stay friends with these people

0:35:46.080 --> 0:35:47.960
<v Speaker 3>or not be around them at all. When I expressed

0:35:48.000 --> 0:35:50.399
<v Speaker 3>my guilt to her, she denied the affair and said

0:35:50.440 --> 0:35:52.960
<v Speaker 3>she thought I was okay with it. I'm questioning how

0:35:53.000 --> 0:35:55.400
<v Speaker 3>long to stay friends with someone before deciding their relationship

0:35:55.480 --> 0:35:58.640
<v Speaker 3>is toxic due to differing life values. Should I consider

0:35:58.719 --> 0:36:01.680
<v Speaker 3>a hard cut off or a soft cut off? Moving forward?

0:36:01.760 --> 0:36:04.240
<v Speaker 3>So it sounds like decided because I'm.

0:36:04.120 --> 0:36:07.439
<v Speaker 2>Glad you know what you need to do because you're

0:36:08.680 --> 0:36:11.239
<v Speaker 2>the what's the quote about the company you keep?

0:36:11.480 --> 0:36:13.439
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, ships don't sink because there's water.

0:36:13.560 --> 0:36:15.040
<v Speaker 3>Eat, that's the one.

0:36:15.520 --> 0:36:18.719
<v Speaker 1>Ships don't sink because there's water outside their boat. They

0:36:18.880 --> 0:36:20.879
<v Speaker 1>sink because there's water inside their boat.

0:36:20.960 --> 0:36:23.640
<v Speaker 2>Well, no way that goes with this, but that's beautiful. Ye,

0:36:23.680 --> 0:36:23.960
<v Speaker 2>it does.

0:36:24.840 --> 0:36:26.560
<v Speaker 1>Get them out, Get them out of your boat.

0:36:26.640 --> 0:36:28.480
<v Speaker 2>Oh, they're they're the water and they're the water.

0:36:28.760 --> 0:36:30.320
<v Speaker 1>Get that water out of your boat.

0:36:30.520 --> 0:36:32.600
<v Speaker 2>Well, you know, I was just going to say something about,

0:36:32.680 --> 0:36:37.080
<v Speaker 2>like the company you keep is a reflection of you

0:36:37.520 --> 0:36:40.880
<v Speaker 2>and your husband, And I think that the fact that

0:36:41.160 --> 0:36:44.080
<v Speaker 2>you listen to her talk about the affair and then

0:36:44.160 --> 0:36:47.840
<v Speaker 2>she feels comfortable enough denying it to your face is

0:36:47.920 --> 0:36:51.880
<v Speaker 2>a a red flag bigger than let me.

0:36:51.920 --> 0:36:57.120
<v Speaker 1>Tell you she's a narcissist. Yeah, And it's very obvious

0:36:57.239 --> 0:37:01.080
<v Speaker 1>to me because these people, these narcissists, they will make

0:37:01.200 --> 0:37:04.400
<v Speaker 1>up these stories in their head and they'll believe them

0:37:04.480 --> 0:37:07.759
<v Speaker 1>to be true because it pertains to their narrative or

0:37:07.800 --> 0:37:11.080
<v Speaker 1>what they want, and it's very scary and it's very weird,

0:37:11.320 --> 0:37:14.600
<v Speaker 1>and I also would just like again, but it's not

0:37:14.640 --> 0:37:16.920
<v Speaker 1>a blanket statement. I don't think cheaters are bad. I

0:37:17.080 --> 0:37:20.239
<v Speaker 1>just think cheaters there's a character flaw in there.

0:37:20.880 --> 0:37:24.160
<v Speaker 2>Well, to me, there's there's cheating and having remorse and

0:37:24.280 --> 0:37:27.040
<v Speaker 2>regret and shame about it. And then I think there's

0:37:27.120 --> 0:37:29.839
<v Speaker 2>cheating and laughing and bragging about it talking about breaking

0:37:29.920 --> 0:37:30.160
<v Speaker 2>up there.

0:37:30.320 --> 0:37:32.640
<v Speaker 1>But that's only part of the story. I'm sure I can.

0:37:32.920 --> 0:37:35.640
<v Speaker 1>I feel like very confident in saying that. I'd say

0:37:35.719 --> 0:37:38.680
<v Speaker 1>like eighty percent of people who cheat have some sort

0:37:38.719 --> 0:37:40.120
<v Speaker 1>of guilt or shame or remorse.

0:37:40.280 --> 0:37:42.319
<v Speaker 2>I know. I'm saying this guy does not the god

0:37:42.480 --> 0:37:42.920
<v Speaker 2>she cheated.

0:37:43.040 --> 0:37:45.600
<v Speaker 1>I'm sure that he does. Behind closed doors, he's probably

0:37:45.719 --> 0:37:47.480
<v Speaker 1>just like making a joke of it, blah blah blah blah,

0:37:47.480 --> 0:37:49.680
<v Speaker 1>and where she doesn't know him one hundred percent of

0:37:49.760 --> 0:37:50.000
<v Speaker 1>the time.

0:37:50.440 --> 0:37:53.000
<v Speaker 2>She said her new partner jokes about breaking up marriages

0:37:53.080 --> 0:37:54.200
<v Speaker 2>and getting with married women.

0:37:54.320 --> 0:37:56.880
<v Speaker 1>I know, but I'm saying he maybe just does that outwardly,

0:37:56.960 --> 0:37:58.560
<v Speaker 1>but we don't know what he feels inwardly.

0:37:58.880 --> 0:38:03.640
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, but that's his that's the character that he's presenting right,

0:38:03.880 --> 0:38:06.000
<v Speaker 2>I'm not saying character, you're surrounding yourself.

0:38:06.239 --> 0:38:07.279
<v Speaker 3>This all is just.

0:38:07.480 --> 0:38:10.879
<v Speaker 1>Bad and I don't like her, I don't like him,

0:38:11.040 --> 0:38:14.279
<v Speaker 1>and I just feel like you need to distance yourself asap.

0:38:14.719 --> 0:38:16.959
<v Speaker 2>I agree. I think the hard cut off or soft

0:38:17.040 --> 0:38:19.080
<v Speaker 2>cut off, I think you just have a conversation and

0:38:19.200 --> 0:38:21.960
<v Speaker 2>say I love you. We've been through so much together,

0:38:22.040 --> 0:38:23.799
<v Speaker 2>but I've had a really hard time with how you've

0:38:23.840 --> 0:38:27.400
<v Speaker 2>handled this and and denying the truth that I was

0:38:27.800 --> 0:38:29.680
<v Speaker 2>a part of during this time of your life and.

0:38:30.520 --> 0:38:33.360
<v Speaker 1>What I appreciate your soft approach, but a narcissist is

0:38:33.440 --> 0:38:34.080
<v Speaker 1>not going to hear that.

0:38:34.880 --> 0:38:37.160
<v Speaker 2>Well, they're not going to hear anything, So it doesn't matter.

0:38:37.200 --> 0:38:39.040
<v Speaker 2>I'm saying, what what's going to make her feel good

0:38:39.080 --> 0:38:39.720
<v Speaker 2>to move forward?

0:38:40.280 --> 0:38:40.520
<v Speaker 1>Sure?

0:38:40.840 --> 0:38:43.040
<v Speaker 3>You saying you're saying hard cut off? Just stop?

0:38:43.440 --> 0:38:44.440
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, oh, just ignore.

0:38:45.360 --> 0:38:47.080
<v Speaker 1>I mean, it's all bad.

0:38:47.840 --> 0:38:50.000
<v Speaker 2>I just think we don't know if they're best friends.

0:38:50.040 --> 0:38:52.200
<v Speaker 2>It kind of seems like they were a couple friends, right,

0:38:52.360 --> 0:38:54.120
<v Speaker 2>So if she's your best friend, like it was me

0:38:54.239 --> 0:38:56.360
<v Speaker 2>and you, I think I would have a conversation.

0:38:56.960 --> 0:38:58.960
<v Speaker 1>If it was me and you and you were having

0:38:59.000 --> 0:39:03.080
<v Speaker 1>an affair on Haley, I would step in before any

0:39:03.120 --> 0:39:04.719
<v Speaker 1>of this, I'd be like, this is not right.

0:39:04.800 --> 0:39:06.400
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, But if I was like I'm not, that's not

0:39:07.320 --> 0:39:08.480
<v Speaker 2>I'm fine, We're fine.

0:39:08.520 --> 0:39:11.280
<v Speaker 1>Don't worry about us murder. I'm kidding.

0:39:11.280 --> 0:39:13.520
<v Speaker 2>I'm kidding, But I'm just saying, like, we don't know

0:39:13.600 --> 0:39:15.359
<v Speaker 2>how close they are, they're like best friends. I think

0:39:15.400 --> 0:39:17.640
<v Speaker 2>it's warrants a conversation of like, hey, I love you

0:39:17.760 --> 0:39:19.640
<v Speaker 2>and I don't agree with this, so I don't I

0:39:19.640 --> 0:39:21.520
<v Speaker 2>don't see this being friends and if it's if it's

0:39:21.560 --> 0:39:24.160
<v Speaker 2>not that, then yeah, just cut it off.

0:39:24.360 --> 0:39:24.560
<v Speaker 3>Yeah.

0:39:24.680 --> 0:39:26.920
<v Speaker 1>I just feel like narcissist are very scary people to

0:39:27.000 --> 0:39:29.400
<v Speaker 1>deal with, so like trying to have a rational conversation

0:39:29.520 --> 0:39:32.800
<v Speaker 1>with one is gonna it's gonna send you into a tailspin.

0:39:33.080 --> 0:39:34.920
<v Speaker 1>So just say yourself, she knows.

0:39:34.800 --> 0:39:37.600
<v Speaker 2>If she's a if she's someone who is receptive to

0:39:37.680 --> 0:39:38.240
<v Speaker 2>a conversation.

0:39:38.360 --> 0:39:39.000
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, yeah, Yeah.

0:39:39.239 --> 0:39:42.759
<v Speaker 3>This is from Jazz. Love the name jazz by the way.

0:39:42.800 --> 0:39:45.920
<v Speaker 3>I like that jazzmine can become jazz or jazz or

0:39:46.000 --> 0:39:49.800
<v Speaker 3>men a lot of men's or jazz me.

0:39:52.280 --> 0:39:54.920
<v Speaker 1>Really it's a jazz me jazzy.

0:39:55.440 --> 0:39:59.200
<v Speaker 3>I mean, I really enjoyed this segment where you didn't

0:39:59.200 --> 0:40:01.239
<v Speaker 3>know who is most likely to and thought i'd offer

0:40:01.320 --> 0:40:03.320
<v Speaker 3>some questions from a similar game we play at parties.

0:40:03.320 --> 0:40:05.480
<v Speaker 3>So here you go, so i'll read the question that

0:40:05.520 --> 0:40:06.719
<v Speaker 3>we'll do. The three two one is that we did

0:40:06.800 --> 0:40:08.680
<v Speaker 3>last time? Yeah, the same time.

0:40:08.800 --> 0:40:09.120
<v Speaker 2>Okay.

0:40:10.040 --> 0:40:13.880
<v Speaker 3>Who is most likely to be pulled over for driving

0:40:13.960 --> 0:40:20.120
<v Speaker 3>too slow? Three two one? Wow? What did you say?

0:40:20.960 --> 0:40:21.000
<v Speaker 2>So?

0:40:22.040 --> 0:40:25.960
<v Speaker 3>I said? Becca? Becca said my shocked. I'm very speeds

0:40:26.560 --> 0:40:28.000
<v Speaker 3>said that because you're always late for stuff.

0:40:28.239 --> 0:40:33.000
<v Speaker 2>That's not because of no, I'm just see you being

0:40:33.200 --> 0:40:38.160
<v Speaker 2>very rule follower. I give you your follower vibe. I've

0:40:38.200 --> 0:40:38.960
<v Speaker 2>driven with Tanya.

0:40:38.960 --> 0:40:42.120
<v Speaker 3>It's so scary and Tanya East both said.

0:40:41.960 --> 0:40:45.080
<v Speaker 1>Tanya, I mean, I'm pretty grandma vibes.

0:40:45.080 --> 0:40:45.880
<v Speaker 3>Okay, yeah, I get that.

0:40:46.040 --> 0:40:49.799
<v Speaker 2>But she also is like chaotic, so it's it might

0:40:49.880 --> 0:40:51.760
<v Speaker 2>be slow, but you're moving around.

0:40:52.320 --> 0:40:56.600
<v Speaker 1>I'm gonna use it.

0:40:56.880 --> 0:40:59.760
<v Speaker 2>One song and that's all she plays for your drives,

0:40:59.800 --> 0:41:00.680
<v Speaker 2>so's a lot.

0:41:00.880 --> 0:41:01.080
<v Speaker 1>Yeah.

0:41:01.280 --> 0:41:03.759
<v Speaker 3>Who is most likely to have a twenty minute conversation

0:41:03.960 --> 0:41:06.680
<v Speaker 3>with Siri? Three two one time?

0:41:09.360 --> 0:41:10.280
<v Speaker 2>Just being bored?

0:41:10.360 --> 0:41:16.480
<v Speaker 1>And I don't even have Siri? Thank you everyone? I

0:41:16.600 --> 0:41:17.239
<v Speaker 1>disabled mine?

0:41:17.400 --> 0:41:22.080
<v Speaker 3>Oh wow, and everything iPhone, your iPad, your Apple TV,

0:41:22.320 --> 0:41:23.200
<v Speaker 3>no serious.

0:41:23.000 --> 0:41:24.919
<v Speaker 1>SERI wow by Siri?

0:41:25.239 --> 0:41:27.000
<v Speaker 3>I guess we were wrong on that one. Yeah, whould

0:41:27.000 --> 0:41:29.560
<v Speaker 3>you say, Mark, why why would I do that?

0:41:30.239 --> 0:41:31.600
<v Speaker 1>East's too smart.

0:41:33.400 --> 0:41:36.279
<v Speaker 2>Though I almost said he think he would know how

0:41:36.280 --> 0:41:38.880
<v Speaker 2>to shut it up because Easton knows how to Like.

0:41:39.520 --> 0:41:42.279
<v Speaker 2>Eastern's curious, so I could see him just asking questions like.

0:41:43.120 --> 0:41:44.759
<v Speaker 4>Once you first came out, I talked to you for

0:41:44.800 --> 0:41:45.080
<v Speaker 4>a week.

0:41:45.640 --> 0:41:45.960
<v Speaker 2>There you go.

0:41:46.480 --> 0:41:48.120
<v Speaker 3>That's like he was right.

0:41:48.760 --> 0:41:48.880
<v Speaker 2>Uh.

0:41:49.239 --> 0:41:52.560
<v Speaker 3>Who is most likely to just want to cuddle three

0:41:52.960 --> 0:42:02.319
<v Speaker 3>two one? I don't know, wow A willing time? Yeah,

0:42:02.600 --> 0:42:05.040
<v Speaker 3>well that's true, but you also like to go beyond cuddling.

0:42:05.320 --> 0:42:07.200
<v Speaker 3>You don't want to limit it to cuddling very often?

0:42:07.280 --> 0:42:09.640
<v Speaker 1>I think, mind just a cuddle?

0:42:12.280 --> 0:42:19.040
<v Speaker 3>Can I do that? Who was most likely to traple

0:42:19.120 --> 0:42:22.240
<v Speaker 3>a kid on Black Friday? Three to one.

0:42:26.760 --> 0:42:28.400
<v Speaker 2>Item that you've been eyeing.

0:42:29.400 --> 0:42:31.800
<v Speaker 1>On sale that was like a post malone circuit.

0:42:33.239 --> 0:42:34.120
<v Speaker 3>Yeah you would you.

0:42:34.440 --> 0:42:38.120
<v Speaker 2>I would never do Black Friday. That's scary, all right?

0:42:38.200 --> 0:42:40.399
<v Speaker 4>Yeah, yeah, I would hurt someone.

0:42:40.480 --> 0:42:46.120
<v Speaker 3>Okay, okay. Who is most likely to drive three plus

0:42:46.239 --> 0:42:49.160
<v Speaker 3>hours in the hopes of hooking up three to one?

0:42:52.040 --> 0:42:52.279
<v Speaker 2>Wow?

0:42:52.600 --> 0:42:52.799
<v Speaker 1>Yeah?

0:42:55.040 --> 0:42:58.200
<v Speaker 3>Who is most likely to play just one song at

0:42:58.239 --> 0:43:00.319
<v Speaker 3>every party? Three two one?

0:43:01.040 --> 0:43:01.279
<v Speaker 1>Yeah.

0:43:02.480 --> 0:43:05.520
<v Speaker 3>Who is most likely to be mentally undressing you right now?

0:43:05.760 --> 0:43:13.640
<v Speaker 3>Three two one? Who most likely you want to be

0:43:13.760 --> 0:43:16.239
<v Speaker 3>exclusive after just one day? Three too?

0:43:16.560 --> 0:43:16.759
<v Speaker 2>Why?

0:43:19.280 --> 0:43:22.839
<v Speaker 3>Who was most likely to Facebook or instagram? Stock? Three two?

0:43:23.080 --> 0:43:23.719
<v Speaker 2>One time?

0:43:23.920 --> 0:43:27.759
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, it is so easy. Who is most likely to

0:43:27.840 --> 0:43:30.560
<v Speaker 3>sit at a stop sign waiting for the turn greene?

0:43:30.800 --> 0:43:33.839
<v Speaker 3>Three too? One time? That's our show.

0:43:34.440 --> 0:43:37.520
<v Speaker 2>I think Jazz set you up to be targeted like

0:43:37.680 --> 0:43:38.360
<v Speaker 2>that jazz.

0:43:38.400 --> 0:43:41.680
<v Speaker 1>Are you gonna do me like that? Jazz? Me super food?

0:43:43.320 --> 0:43:51.640
<v Speaker 1>Come on? Speaking of man, I saw a meme the

0:43:51.640 --> 0:43:53.440
<v Speaker 1>other day that was like, it was for Love Island

0:43:53.520 --> 0:43:55.640
<v Speaker 1>and she goes, I wonder what my sims are doing

0:43:55.760 --> 0:43:57.759
<v Speaker 1>right now, And that's like exactly how I feel about

0:43:57.760 --> 0:43:59.920
<v Speaker 1>that show. Oh yeah, yeah, it does feel like that.

0:44:00.040 --> 0:44:03.880
<v Speaker 1>Uh yeah, anyway, all right, well you guys would have

0:44:03.920 --> 0:44:10.840
<v Speaker 1>laughed if you watch AnyWho that's watching.

0:44:10.960 --> 0:44:12.879
<v Speaker 2>It was a tough because I gave you a lat

0:44:13.000 --> 0:44:20.600
<v Speaker 2>but it was dark. Happy birthday, Tanya the Scrubbers. I

0:44:20.680 --> 0:44:24.399
<v Speaker 2>know you'll already be wishing her happy birthday, but here's

0:44:24.440 --> 0:44:25.040
<v Speaker 2>your reminder.

0:44:25.200 --> 0:44:25.920
<v Speaker 1>Thank you so much.

0:44:26.360 --> 0:44:28.920
<v Speaker 2>We love y'all. Have a great weekend. We'll be back Monday.

0:44:28.960 --> 0:44:30.720
<v Speaker 2>Well I don't know Monday, Tuesday.

0:44:31.080 --> 0:44:39.200
<v Speaker 1>We could Wednesday Friday, all right. We love you so much,

0:44:39.400 --> 0:44:40.040
<v Speaker 1>love you bye.