WEBVTT - Growing Up Rivera with My Cousin Karina 0:00:03.320 --> 0:00:06.600 Hello everyone, and welcome to your favorite podcast, She gets 0:00:06.640 --> 0:00:09.520 in Chill. I hope that you're having a beautiful week. 0:00:09.600 --> 0:00:12.080 If it is Monday and you know you're watching this 0:00:12.160 --> 0:00:14.840 on Monday, it will be have an amazing week and 0:00:15.000 --> 0:00:17.840 neither day. Honestly, thank you for tuning in, either if 0:00:17.840 --> 0:00:20.520 you're listening or watching. Thank you so much. I am 0:00:20.640 --> 0:00:23.640 very excited today because I have a very special guest, 0:00:23.840 --> 0:00:26.520 someone that needs a lot to meet, someone that I've 0:00:26.560 --> 0:00:28.680 been wanting to have on my podcast for a very 0:00:28.720 --> 0:00:31.520 long time. And I have my little pew carts here, 0:00:31.520 --> 0:00:33.000 but I don't think I'm even going to use them. 0:00:34.200 --> 0:00:38.000 And she's a family member. And her name is Karina 0:00:38.080 --> 0:00:43.800 Rivera Nabarrow. Everybody say hat to be cut in. So 0:00:43.840 --> 0:00:46.240 this is my cousin. We're two years apart, right because 0:00:46.280 --> 0:00:49.880 it's two years apart, and she is. For those of 0:00:49.920 --> 0:00:52.040 you who are familiar with their family, she is my 0:00:52.159 --> 0:00:56.640 mom's brother, Will Stravel. So there's Pete, my uncle Gus, 0:00:57.040 --> 0:01:01.200 then my mom, then my dear little Bee well and Rosie. 0:01:01.240 --> 0:01:05.840 So this is my uncle who, that's daughter who my 0:01:05.920 --> 0:01:08.080 theo guys I love very much. I have to actually 0:01:08.080 --> 0:01:09.680 bring them on the pod. You guys. I think it 0:01:09.720 --> 0:01:11.679 would be a very yeah, it would be a very 0:01:11.720 --> 0:01:14.920 great freaking conversation. But I thought it'd be nice to 0:01:14.959 --> 0:01:17.120 bring my cousin because this is I'm gonna say it, 0:01:17.160 --> 0:01:19.080 and I don't want her anyone's feelings, but this is 0:01:19.120 --> 0:01:22.800 my favorite cousin. She's been my favorite cousin since Ford. 0:01:22.800 --> 0:01:25.679 We have the favorites, you know, forever. We just we 0:01:25.760 --> 0:01:29.600 grew up together. This was I was explaining, you know, 0:01:29.680 --> 0:01:31.040 I was only able to spend the night at two 0:01:31.040 --> 0:01:33.880 people's houses if it was at the HS house and 0:01:34.640 --> 0:01:35.520 the AS house. 0:01:35.560 --> 0:01:38.560 So that was that's who you Yeah, yep, And same year, 0:01:38.600 --> 0:01:41.200 we spent a lot of time together. Yeah, and Trey 0:01:41.360 --> 0:01:43.280 is my mom. That's what they call my mom, Chay 0:01:43.920 --> 0:01:46.920 the family, and and yeah, my mom would only let 0:01:46.959 --> 0:01:49.600 me spend the night at you know, Patty at the 0:01:49.640 --> 0:01:51.639 Obus's house. So we did a lot of summers together, 0:01:52.360 --> 0:01:55.080 and we grew up together, and we've lived through a lot, 0:01:55.120 --> 0:01:57.480 you guys. So we're gonna talk about a lot of things, 0:01:57.520 --> 0:01:59.720 because we didn't even really talk much about what we're 0:01:59.720 --> 0:02:01.880 going to talk and we have the few cards here, 0:02:01.920 --> 0:02:05.800 but I just want to let the conversation flow and 0:02:05.800 --> 0:02:07.560 and you're married, cousin, so it was okay, that's say 0:02:07.560 --> 0:02:08.359 in tomorrow. Yeah. 0:02:08.960 --> 0:02:09.160 Yeah. 0:02:09.320 --> 0:02:11.440 One thing I will tell you, and I think i've 0:02:11.480 --> 0:02:14.040 told you this, cousin, is that I'm so grateful because 0:02:14.120 --> 0:02:15.960 you were one of the few people that stood by 0:02:16.000 --> 0:02:19.880 me during that time that my mom and all were sorry. Yeah, 0:02:19.880 --> 0:02:20.799 she were very pissed. 0:02:20.960 --> 0:02:24.480 I was, and I mean one of the last messages 0:02:24.520 --> 0:02:26.920 that I got to message with you know, your mom 0:02:27.080 --> 0:02:28.919 was like, you know, you got to talk to this lady. 0:02:29.160 --> 0:02:31.639 I always felt like I was able to tell her like. 0:02:31.840 --> 0:02:36.080 Lady like no, yeah, that's what it was. Figgure right 0:02:36.120 --> 0:02:40.160 now because my mom would always say, and when I 0:02:40.200 --> 0:02:41.800 was younger, they should work with my feelings. I'm not 0:02:41.800 --> 0:02:43.840 evenna lie, but my mom would say, why can't you 0:02:43.880 --> 0:02:46.680 be like your cousin Karna. She she should have been 0:02:46.680 --> 0:02:51.000 my daughter because she's smart, because you've always gotten straight a's, 0:02:51.040 --> 0:02:53.639 because you've been good in school. She's a reader. She 0:02:53.680 --> 0:02:55.680 would get straight a's. And I'm I'm gonna lie. I 0:02:55.760 --> 0:02:57.760 was I was a C student. I was like, I'm 0:02:57.760 --> 0:02:58.480 gonna just get by. 0:02:58.720 --> 0:03:00.400 These students are bosses. 0:03:01.080 --> 0:03:03.959 Thank you, cousin. It used to hurt my feelings, I'm like, Mom, 0:03:04.080 --> 0:03:05.920 how can you say that? She's like, yeah, I have 0:03:05.960 --> 0:03:09.720 some dumb ass kids and they sure, now, no, we're 0:03:09.760 --> 0:03:11.960 doing other thing. But yes, my cousin, he's always been 0:03:12.080 --> 0:03:15.680 very intelligent. You're very smart, straight A student, like, that's 0:03:15.720 --> 0:03:17.520 one thing my mom was, you guys had a very 0:03:17.600 --> 0:03:22.360 nice and unique relationship because you were one of the 0:03:22.360 --> 0:03:24.799 few people that can also tell her hey, I don't 0:03:24.840 --> 0:03:25.760 agree with that thea. 0:03:26.000 --> 0:03:28.239 Again, I would never say disrespectful because I know she 0:03:28.240 --> 0:03:29.600 would cuss me out or yah to me. 0:03:29.680 --> 0:03:31.639 But talking about her cussing us out, do you want 0:03:31.639 --> 0:03:33.520 to tell everyone about that time that she beat around? 0:03:33.639 --> 0:03:33.760 Oh? 0:03:33.840 --> 0:03:35.360 Yes, that is like. 0:03:35.360 --> 0:03:40.160 My favorite story to tell because it was in November. 0:03:40.240 --> 0:03:40.920 I'll never forget. 0:03:41.000 --> 0:03:45.240 It was Jackie's birthday and we were going to it 0:03:45.280 --> 0:03:50.360 was Tracky Cheese and Lakewood and Cheeks was like, let's 0:03:50.440 --> 0:03:52.680 go see Junior and I was like he was my 0:03:52.760 --> 0:03:55.320 little boyfriend. Yeah, I guess her boyfriend at the time. 0:03:55.440 --> 0:03:58.960 And we were down the street and Cheeks was like, okay, 0:03:59.000 --> 0:04:01.440 let's see her. Mom's key and I just worked at 0:04:01.600 --> 0:04:04.760 all the times. I was like, you know, I felt 0:04:04.760 --> 0:04:06.400 I was like, we can get cat. 0:04:06.480 --> 0:04:08.400 I was like it doesn't matter. Okay, let's say took 0:04:08.440 --> 0:04:09.720 the keys on my back. 0:04:10.040 --> 0:04:13.680 We went and my mom called my the cell phone 0:04:13.720 --> 0:04:16.120 that was in there or whatever, and I. 0:04:16.080 --> 0:04:17.559 Was like, oh my god, we're gonna get in trouble. 0:04:17.560 --> 0:04:23.200 And yeah, right when we were over there, they started calling. Well, 0:04:23.240 --> 0:04:26.280 we got back to the chirky cheese, shaggy cheese. My 0:04:26.440 --> 0:04:29.960 bianche was like, let's go for a ride. She took 0:04:30.000 --> 0:04:30.640 my mom's car. 0:04:30.720 --> 0:04:32.839 It was at eighty seven Mercedes, I'll never bring it. 0:04:33.760 --> 0:04:40.120 And she parked and she like, you know, she slept 0:04:40.160 --> 0:04:40.480 us around. 0:04:40.560 --> 0:04:44.600 Yeah, this was before all this. Yeah, it was a 0:04:44.680 --> 0:04:46.240 thing you guys that you should not do this in 0:04:46.279 --> 0:04:48.200 touch your children. I'm probably if she was here, she 0:04:48.240 --> 0:04:50.159 would have cared. Now, always the type of mom would 0:04:50.160 --> 0:04:52.440 be like, I tell him it's cool that I kicked dressing. 0:04:52.480 --> 0:04:55.400 Oh yeah, oh yeah Dan yeah no game. 0:04:56.160 --> 0:04:59.360 So then she you know, can tra us And then 0:04:59.440 --> 0:05:02.760 she made us saying to Jackie saying you having birthday 0:05:02.800 --> 0:05:05.200 to her and you better be up yes or so 0:05:05.520 --> 0:05:07.960 there we are like cheeks, you know. 0:05:08.240 --> 0:05:09.200 Holding back tears. 0:05:09.360 --> 0:05:11.640 I'm holding back to yours because I'm like pissed and 0:05:11.680 --> 0:05:12.560 I'm like, damn. 0:05:12.320 --> 0:05:14.760 I got in trouble and it's all my fault because 0:05:14.760 --> 0:05:15.760 then I'm sorry. 0:05:15.960 --> 0:05:18.600 And then two weeks after that, to eat your mom 0:05:18.680 --> 0:05:21.159 calls the house and she has to talk to me. 0:05:21.560 --> 0:05:24.240 She's like, Mayhan, She's like, are you still mad at me? 0:05:24.560 --> 0:05:25.440 I was like no. 0:05:26.200 --> 0:05:27.960 She's like, okay, what are you off for Christmas? 0:05:29.279 --> 0:05:32.760 And that was oh my mom, you know that was 0:05:33.520 --> 0:05:35.360 my cousain. Just she's like, she's probably like I want 0:05:35.360 --> 0:05:37.640 to say no to this girl. But all right, here 0:05:37.680 --> 0:05:40.400 we go. Oh my gosh, kids don't do that. Okay, yeah, 0:05:40.400 --> 0:05:44.800 listen to your parents. Please listen to your parents. But okay, 0:05:44.880 --> 0:05:46.480 now get into something a little bit more serious. This 0:05:46.520 --> 0:05:48.280 is a question that I don't think I've asked you, 0:05:48.839 --> 0:05:52.440 but I want to ask you. How what have you 0:05:52.560 --> 0:05:57.360 felt about me not using the last day of Rivera 0:05:57.400 --> 0:06:00.599 because you are Rivera? But like one, you could be 0:06:00.720 --> 0:06:02.560 straight up like how do you feel about it? 0:06:02.640 --> 0:06:04.479 You know, listen, it didn't bother me. I don't feel 0:06:04.520 --> 0:06:04.880 like that. 0:06:04.920 --> 0:06:07.200 Was an issue. 0:06:07.240 --> 0:06:11.600 I understand, Like why because at one point in our 0:06:11.680 --> 0:06:15.240 lives having the last name Rivera was such an honor 0:06:15.839 --> 0:06:18.479 and you decided that to use that. I was like, 0:06:18.560 --> 0:06:21.240 you know, that's that's that's fine. Like she stands on 0:06:21.240 --> 0:06:23.440 her own, like she could do it on her own. So, 0:06:24.279 --> 0:06:27.400 you know, I think it was good because everybody knows 0:06:27.400 --> 0:06:31.159 you as Cheeky's not like you know, cheeee Rivera Cheekys, 0:06:31.640 --> 0:06:35.400 so they know like you. I personally wasn't offended. I 0:06:35.480 --> 0:06:38.320 know maybe some people in our family might have been offended. 0:06:37.960 --> 0:06:42.000 By that, but yeah, yeah, because I've gotten that question 0:06:42.080 --> 0:06:45.039 a lot. And it's not that I didn't want to 0:06:45.160 --> 0:06:48.599 use it. It's just I've always I've always been Jenny Marine, yeah, 0:06:48.680 --> 0:06:52.359 no matter what my dad did. Yeah, I've always held 0:06:52.400 --> 0:06:54.400 on to that. Last year, I never felt the need 0:06:54.480 --> 0:06:57.799 to change it. I mean, Mikey feels different, which I respect. 0:06:57.880 --> 0:07:01.200 Did Mikey changes He has it legally, but he wants 0:07:01.200 --> 0:07:04.320 to and he wants to also, like you know, change 0:07:04.320 --> 0:07:06.000 his daughter's last names. And I don't know, if I'm 0:07:06.000 --> 0:07:07.400 talking too much, you will probably be upset with me. 0:07:07.440 --> 0:07:09.440 But that's what I know. I don't think he's done 0:07:09.480 --> 0:07:11.440 it yet. He wants him to be Rivera, and I'm 0:07:11.480 --> 0:07:14.120 fine with that. I respect everyone's dicisies, you know how 0:07:14.160 --> 0:07:16.840 I am. I just I always was like, Okay, I 0:07:16.880 --> 0:07:18.600 want to be known as cheeky's and not that I'm 0:07:18.600 --> 0:07:21.080 not proud of my mother and everything. Yeah she accomplished, 0:07:21.680 --> 0:07:24.320 but not because I'm like, oh, I'm descending my dad's 0:07:24.360 --> 0:07:26.960 last name. It's just more of like who I am. Yeah, 0:07:26.960 --> 0:07:29.960 I know what I mean. And now that all this 0:07:30.160 --> 0:07:33.200 stuff has happened in our family, to be honest, I 0:07:33.200 --> 0:07:35.960 feel better about it. Yeah, I'm like, to be honest, 0:07:36.000 --> 0:07:37.920 I'm like, I don't not that I don't want to 0:07:37.920 --> 0:07:40.800 be associated because that's my family regarded as that's my 0:07:40.800 --> 0:07:43.680 blood regardless, and I never wish to anything bad like 0:07:44.280 --> 0:07:47.240 at all, but I just don't. There's a lot of 0:07:47.280 --> 0:07:48.720 things that I don't agree with and all like things 0:07:48.680 --> 0:07:50.360 that have happened that just I'm like. 0:07:50.880 --> 0:07:54.440 Yeah, I completely I completely agree him. Yeah, you're not 0:07:54.520 --> 0:07:58.200 wanting to fold on to that. You know, it's completely 0:07:58.960 --> 0:08:02.800 relevant because, like you said, everything that has happened, especially 0:08:02.840 --> 0:08:06.480 in the past eleven years, has been a motherfucking a lot. 0:08:06.760 --> 0:08:10.800 It has had a lot to process still, So there's 0:08:10.840 --> 0:08:14.200 day a lot to process, a lot to heal, a 0:08:14.240 --> 0:08:16.760 lot of still grief, you know. 0:08:17.040 --> 0:08:19.480 Jennakan that said, at the end of day, it's a cycle. 0:08:19.520 --> 0:08:20.280 It's not linear. 0:08:20.400 --> 0:08:23.520 It's like some dings are cool, and then some days 0:08:23.560 --> 0:08:26.400 you're like, what this is really life? This is not 0:08:26.640 --> 0:08:30.240 what I had envisioned or when we were growing up, 0:08:30.360 --> 0:08:34.480 or how our dynamics were as far as our family dynamics, 0:08:35.000 --> 0:08:36.719 never expected things to. 0:08:36.800 --> 0:08:37.760 Churn out how they were. 0:08:37.840 --> 0:08:42.600 But then you you adjust, you learn to deal with 0:08:43.000 --> 0:08:46.439 to kind of like re learn how to relive, you know. 0:08:46.600 --> 0:08:49.360 And I'm not going to say that it was always 0:08:49.400 --> 0:08:51.640 all bad. There was always a lot of things in 0:08:51.679 --> 0:08:54.320 our family that happened that you and I would talk about, 0:08:54.440 --> 0:08:56.960 what little yeah, behind closed doors and it's just like, 0:08:56.960 --> 0:08:58.680 I don't know, this is a little weird. Yeah, A 0:08:58.720 --> 0:09:01.640 lot of things, a lot of jealousy, a lot of 0:09:01.960 --> 0:09:04.160 stuff that we would notice when we were cloyers. 0:09:04.360 --> 0:09:06.439 Well we're teenagers, and I would ask you like, is 0:09:06.480 --> 0:09:08.840 this like, am I seeing things from a weird point 0:09:08.840 --> 0:09:12.960 of view? Or you know, or you see kind of 0:09:12.960 --> 0:09:15.400 what I'm seeing That we did see a lot of things. 0:09:15.559 --> 0:09:18.240 I was like, No, a lot of jealousy amongst the women. 0:09:18.360 --> 0:09:20.240 It was a lot of jealousy amongst women. And I'm 0:09:20.240 --> 0:09:22.120 sure a lot of the people that are listening or 0:09:22.160 --> 0:09:24.840 watching can relate, you know. I think this happens a 0:09:24.840 --> 0:09:28.120 lot in many families. It's just our family happens to 0:09:28.160 --> 0:09:31.000 be a famous one or a very successful one or 0:09:31.000 --> 0:09:33.520 whatever you want to call it. But this is stuff 0:09:33.559 --> 0:09:35.120 that we've noticed for a very long time. I think 0:09:35.160 --> 0:09:37.280 we just knew how to hide it, or there wasn't 0:09:37.360 --> 0:09:40.319 social media or you know, all this stuff. But there 0:09:40.320 --> 0:09:42.280 were moments that we had great Christmases together. 0:09:42.480 --> 0:09:43.280 Yeah, you know. 0:09:43.559 --> 0:09:45.440 There were time when we lived off of Illu streeted 0:09:45.440 --> 0:09:47.760 Long Beach at Grandma's house and for Christmas, Oh, he 0:09:47.840 --> 0:09:50.520 had it there, and you know, and Grandma and Grandpa 0:09:50.559 --> 0:09:52.840 were still together, and they would give us I can 0:09:52.920 --> 0:09:55.160 see as you remember that they you know, and we 0:09:55.200 --> 0:09:57.520 would break them and they would make us box, you 0:09:57.559 --> 0:10:01.160 guys in the hard, boxing each other. I had a 0:10:01.160 --> 0:10:05.560 box Doorna. She beat my ass every time. And then 0:10:05.800 --> 0:10:09.080 my mom passed and I was one of the main pillars, 0:10:09.120 --> 0:10:10.040 I think in her family. 0:10:10.240 --> 0:10:13.280 And that's when I realized that this now, I really 0:10:13.960 --> 0:10:17.880 realized that, like, damn, my aunt really held this family together. 0:10:18.240 --> 0:10:18.720 She didn't. 0:10:18.840 --> 0:10:23.080 And you start processing now you're like, damn, like this 0:10:23.280 --> 0:10:27.080 is not what I thought my family was. Like you said, 0:10:27.120 --> 0:10:29.400 I love a family. I didn't never wish about it 0:10:29.520 --> 0:10:31.800 will or nothing like that. It's just not what I 0:10:31.960 --> 0:10:36.319 thought what happened exactly. I thought it was gonna make 0:10:36.400 --> 0:10:38.640 people closer. I thought it was gonna make you know. 0:10:38.720 --> 0:10:41.280 I was like, you know, I love being on the 0:10:41.440 --> 0:10:45.200 sidelines and seeing you know, like you cousin doing your singing, 0:10:45.400 --> 0:10:47.520 You're seeing other people doing their thing them. I was like, 0:10:47.760 --> 0:10:49.520 you know, awsome be fabulous. 0:10:49.760 --> 0:10:54.120 Yeah, it's been pretty crazy. And I realized and I 0:10:54.320 --> 0:10:56.840 always knew that my mom was a pillar because I 0:10:56.880 --> 0:11:01.640 saw how people would look for her and how she 0:11:01.760 --> 0:11:05.000 was needed financially. Yeah, it's just the truth. Whether people 0:11:05.040 --> 0:11:07.640 want to admit it or not, the truth is I 0:11:07.679 --> 0:11:10.599 saw and I lived it at first. So many conversations, 0:11:10.760 --> 0:11:13.320 my mom told me so many things. She helped out 0:11:13.320 --> 0:11:22.200 a lot of people going back to so this whole 0:11:22.200 --> 0:11:25.360 thing I did realize that who my mom was in 0:11:25.400 --> 0:11:28.640 the family was that my mom would tell people straight up, 0:11:29.360 --> 0:11:31.439 like she would not put up with anyone's book. Yeah, no, 0:11:31.600 --> 0:11:34.240 she didn't. And if something was wrong, she would see it. 0:11:34.280 --> 0:11:37.280 She would either write you an email. She loved that emails, 0:11:37.720 --> 0:11:40.480 you know, but she would let it be old, you know, 0:11:40.760 --> 0:11:42.520 and she'd be like, this is what's going on, and 0:11:42.559 --> 0:11:44.120 this is why I'm moving to Corona. And I don't 0:11:44.120 --> 0:11:47.920 agree with this, that's why. That's why we moved to 0:11:47.960 --> 0:11:51.520 Corona because of Grandpa and his affair. Okay, that's why. 0:11:51.520 --> 0:11:53.400 Because I don't know if you remember, growing up, we 0:11:53.400 --> 0:11:56.840 were all at like in a certain radius. Everyone had 0:11:56.840 --> 0:11:58.360 to be either in loam, beat your thing. 0:11:58.600 --> 0:11:59.560 It couldn't be too far. 0:12:00.120 --> 0:12:03.240 So it was like this family thing. Yeah, and my 0:12:03.320 --> 0:12:05.079 mom said, f this, I'm gonna be the first one 0:12:05.120 --> 0:12:07.960 to move away. Yeah, because I was so disappointed and 0:12:08.000 --> 0:12:10.360 so hurt that my grandpa was having an affair with 0:12:10.400 --> 0:12:13.120 a woman that was her age. I was having a baby. 0:12:13.600 --> 0:12:16.120 She was distraught. She just was like, that's my daddy 0:12:16.160 --> 0:12:18.480 like coming so our family. Mom was so distorted. She 0:12:18.480 --> 0:12:20.920 just said, f this, I'm leaving, And from there she 0:12:21.080 --> 0:12:23.720 started happening. Yeah, you know, it was already kind of Yeah. 0:12:23.720 --> 0:12:25.600 And I'm not trying to judge my grandpa. I don't 0:12:25.600 --> 0:12:28.200 agree with a lot of things. I still love my grandpa. 0:12:28.200 --> 0:12:30.560 I left my grandpa through it, but that's the truth, 0:12:31.000 --> 0:12:34.240 you know, And I think it did Hyperrito, mister Burrito, 0:12:35.160 --> 0:12:36.640 and I'm missing him. I haven't talked to him in 0:12:36.679 --> 0:12:38.440 so long. You know, it's it's real mest up all 0:12:38.480 --> 0:12:40.440 this stuff that's happening. But there's again there's a lot 0:12:40.480 --> 0:12:43.320 of stuff that I don't agree with. Yeah, but that's 0:12:43.480 --> 0:12:45.839 when we moved away and my mom would just say 0:12:45.920 --> 0:12:48.600 how it is, and I when she was no longer there, 0:12:48.640 --> 0:12:51.800 there was like no authority. Yeah. Then I think that's 0:12:51.840 --> 0:12:54.240 when it was that everything was chaotic and they're missing 0:12:54.280 --> 0:12:56.720 of course they're missing their daughter, they're missing their sister. 0:12:56.840 --> 0:12:59.840 Like it's such a huge law. It was a world 0:13:00.120 --> 0:13:03.640 our family that it just everything that was chaos. Yeah. 0:13:03.679 --> 0:13:05.880 You know, for a long time I was very like 0:13:06.200 --> 0:13:09.120 considered of that and compassionate about everyone's feelings. But then 0:13:09.160 --> 0:13:12.000 it gets to a point where you're like I can't 0:13:12.040 --> 0:13:14.880 excuse that. I'm sorry no matter what. Yeah, you still 0:13:14.880 --> 0:13:17.120 got to act right because yeah, my mom's like here physically, 0:13:17.920 --> 0:13:19.199 but she still watched it. Oh yeah. 0:13:19.240 --> 0:13:22.199 And that's that's one thing is like that my aunt 0:13:22.320 --> 0:13:22.720 was my aunt. 0:13:22.800 --> 0:13:24.240 I respected my aunt. 0:13:24.480 --> 0:13:27.760 I knew that lady did not play and I just 0:13:27.840 --> 0:13:32.480 knew that a lot of things that have happened was 0:13:32.520 --> 0:13:33.959 in his past eleven years. 0:13:34.200 --> 0:13:37.559 My aunt was still near that would not ever, ever, ever. 0:13:37.880 --> 0:13:41.960 Ever, not a word would have came out of people's mouth, 0:13:43.280 --> 0:13:45.160 not certain actions. 0:13:46.400 --> 0:13:48.320 I just know that for sure. That's one thing I 0:13:48.320 --> 0:13:50.600 will say. Mam was an amazing provis was a great mom. 0:13:50.679 --> 0:13:53.880 We had a relationship that we were sisters and they 0:13:53.920 --> 0:13:56.040 were just so so close, but we loved each other 0:13:56.040 --> 0:13:57.560 so much. Honestly, I think I can go to my 0:13:57.559 --> 0:13:59.880 mom for anything. It's our mom, Simon, so I want 0:14:00.160 --> 0:14:01.520 and she would get it from me. Because right now 0:14:01.559 --> 0:14:03.360 I remember the Buddy which she surprised me with that 0:14:03.400 --> 0:14:06.720 car yet you know it was blue. Yeah, you know 0:14:06.760 --> 0:14:09.840 it's a vertical verto. It had just came out. Yeah, 0:14:09.880 --> 0:14:12.400 it was two early two thousand early two. I think 0:14:12.400 --> 0:14:15.000 it was two thousand and three somebody. Yeah, right, I 0:14:15.000 --> 0:14:17.000 think you are what for your sixteenth birthday problem? Now, 0:14:17.080 --> 0:14:20.040 huh something like that? Oh my mama. But now that 0:14:20.080 --> 0:14:22.080 we're talking about all this and that you know that 0:14:22.080 --> 0:14:25.320 it's true you lived through everything with me, cousin, even 0:14:25.680 --> 0:14:27.160 during that time though we had talked a little bit 0:14:27.200 --> 0:14:28.800 at the end of the day, like it wasn't even 0:14:28.840 --> 0:14:31.040 that much. We have not been there. You've been there 0:14:31.080 --> 0:14:33.280 with me. And I heard this comment the other day, 0:14:33.960 --> 0:14:35.520 and I'm not gonna say where or who said it, 0:14:35.560 --> 0:14:38.960 but I'm sure you guys will know. But they set 0:14:39.000 --> 0:14:42.640 something down the lines of that I was such a 0:14:42.720 --> 0:14:46.440 nice girl. I was so nice, and that fame got 0:14:46.440 --> 0:14:48.560 to me, that fame changed me, that I'm a different 0:14:48.600 --> 0:14:51.080 personnel and it's the people that surround me that have 0:14:51.200 --> 0:14:54.160 changed me. Honestly, Cousin, say it how it is, whatever 0:14:54.200 --> 0:14:55.640 it is that you may think, I want you to 0:14:56.040 --> 0:14:57.880 tell me. Know what do you think about that? Now? 0:14:58.200 --> 0:14:59.120 I think sometimes you. 0:14:59.120 --> 0:15:02.520 Need to be more of a bit, you know, because 0:15:02.760 --> 0:15:07.520 you know, cheeks, You've always been, always looked at people, 0:15:07.720 --> 0:15:08.960 seeing the good siding people. 0:15:09.280 --> 0:15:10.280 You don't like to. 0:15:10.320 --> 0:15:17.360 Cause problems, you don't like to you know, certain frictions. 0:15:17.720 --> 0:15:22.200 So I think that sometimes you need a babitch. But no, 0:15:22.280 --> 0:15:24.640 I don't think fame has gotten to you in any way, 0:15:24.640 --> 0:15:27.360 shape or form, thing and everybody just because I see you. 0:15:27.280 --> 0:15:28.160 Know you're my cousin. 0:15:28.240 --> 0:15:33.440 I it's thirty six years of you know, even my cousin, 0:15:33.520 --> 0:15:34.920 I see you the same, you know. 0:15:35.040 --> 0:15:38.000 I really don't feel that I'm saying fame because I don't. 0:15:38.120 --> 0:15:40.120 I don't I know people know me. I don't. 0:15:40.480 --> 0:15:40.960 I don't know. 0:15:41.200 --> 0:15:43.320 Like when they said that. I was like, what, like, 0:15:43.480 --> 0:15:48.720 I what happened is that I'm not that that naive yeah, 0:15:49.400 --> 0:15:51.200 global little girl that I used to be, that you 0:15:51.200 --> 0:15:52.720 could just manipulate. 0:15:53.280 --> 0:15:53.720 I don't know. 0:15:53.840 --> 0:15:55.120 I was just when I when I heard that the 0:15:55.160 --> 0:15:57.040 other day, I was like, Okay, well, everyone is entitled 0:15:57.040 --> 0:15:59.280 to their own opinion. It's fine. No memory is that. 0:15:59.600 --> 0:16:02.160 It's just I have changed. I have changed in a 0:16:02.200 --> 0:16:04.840 way of if I'm saying the same person and I'm 0:16:04.840 --> 0:16:08.000 not really, yeah, I'm not evolving. Yeah, of course I changed. Yes, yeah, 0:16:08.000 --> 0:16:10.120 I have changed. I'm not the same person I was. 0:16:09.840 --> 0:16:14.040 I'm more mature. I could say that I'm smarter, I'm wiser. 0:16:17.200 --> 0:16:18.920 Do you still talk to any of our eccentifics? 0:16:19.040 --> 0:16:22.800 I haven't, cousin, I'm like the uh, the rose, will 0:16:23.040 --> 0:16:26.040 you know, reach out and say happy birthday here you know, 0:16:26.440 --> 0:16:31.320 here in there, But to have conversations might have have 0:16:31.480 --> 0:16:34.680 no for me. My separation of our. 0:16:34.600 --> 0:16:37.320 Family was back in like twenty eighteen. 0:16:37.840 --> 0:16:41.360 There was a specific situation that I was just like, 0:16:41.440 --> 0:16:43.640 and this is something that you had no control over, 0:16:43.800 --> 0:16:47.360 or that you needed to fix or my other cousins 0:16:47.400 --> 0:16:50.000 needed to fix. No, this was sort of like the 0:16:50.040 --> 0:16:53.760 pillars of our family that needed to fix situations and 0:16:53.840 --> 0:16:56.840 they never got fixed. So I just knew that it 0:16:56.880 --> 0:16:57.480 was not ever. 0:16:57.400 --> 0:16:59.480 Going to give six. You've always been very good with 0:16:59.640 --> 0:17:01.720 being a risk backful kind of like you know, which 0:17:01.760 --> 0:17:02.120 I love. 0:17:02.440 --> 0:17:05.080 And I did stay my peace so too to my 0:17:05.200 --> 0:17:07.159 the roves and and they want to say, you know, 0:17:07.440 --> 0:17:12.560 this is not okay or what I feel is I 0:17:12.560 --> 0:17:14.720 don't agree with certain Yeah this is and how not 0:17:14.880 --> 0:17:17.480 how our family's supposed to be. And I, you know, 0:17:17.640 --> 0:17:20.359 never be just. I was not respectful, but I just 0:17:20.359 --> 0:17:23.320 said my peace, and you know, yeah, yeah. 0:17:23.040 --> 0:17:25.560 And you know what I I don't really talk to 0:17:25.600 --> 0:17:28.639 anyone else other than honestly. I would love to have 0:17:28.640 --> 0:17:31.840 a better relationship with all my cousins. I I've always 0:17:31.880 --> 0:17:34.440 said this from the very beginning. You know, I don't 0:17:34.440 --> 0:17:39.040 want the kids, the cousins to get involved in all this, 0:17:39.840 --> 0:17:41.280 you know all and that's something that you and I 0:17:41.320 --> 0:17:44.200 would always say, Yeah, I want us to be different 0:17:44.240 --> 0:17:46.520 from the elders. You know. I was like, I don't 0:17:46.560 --> 0:17:47.800 want to find with my cousins. 0:17:47.880 --> 0:17:52.240 Yeah, and even with your the dynamics with your siblings. 0:17:52.359 --> 0:17:55.800 I remember you said, I don't want to be like 0:17:56.040 --> 0:18:00.000 how our our you know my mom is with you know. 0:18:00.240 --> 0:18:02.960 Her siblings. Yeah, you know it's my it's my job 0:18:03.000 --> 0:18:05.040 as the eldest, and that promise I make to my 0:18:05.080 --> 0:18:08.320 mom that way, I'm gonna try my best to no job, 0:18:08.440 --> 0:18:10.280 leave you. I continue to do great job. And you 0:18:10.359 --> 0:18:12.679 just put the moffuckers in the line that have to do. 0:18:13.560 --> 0:18:16.360 And you know those ups. 0:18:16.160 --> 0:18:20.760 And downs are always gonna happen. Yeah, and us, we're 0:18:20.800 --> 0:18:23.720 always gonna fight with our siblings or with their family members. 0:18:23.720 --> 0:18:27.439 But there's there's a lie. There's a lie. And I 0:18:27.520 --> 0:18:32.360 feel some people don't don't see those wife they just yep, 0:18:32.600 --> 0:18:35.600 they don't. They don't respect boundaries. So you know, you know, 0:18:35.680 --> 0:18:37.800 And one thing I will say about my deal Gus Yo. 0:18:37.720 --> 0:18:41.920