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Speaker 1: Text you will healing textual. You know, there are ointments

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Speaker 1: that heal burns or sprays that clean up scrapes, and

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Speaker 1: this is the radio gel that we need to smother

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Speaker 1: onto the infected wounds of society. We're gonna apply generously

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Speaker 1: to the afflicted area in a segment we call textual healing.

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Speaker 2: Is it so burn?

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Speaker 1: Yeah, if you haven't heard it before, it's basically our

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Speaker 1: way of helping out listeners who have an issue in

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Speaker 1: the text apartment. Maybe they aren't good at texting, maybe

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Speaker 1: the situation is really uncomfortable and they're just not sure

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Speaker 1: what to say. Whatever it is will help them out.

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Speaker 1: And So who's today's honored guest that needs a Costco

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Speaker 1: sized jug of textual healing? Her name is Rachel. Rachel,

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Speaker 1: Welcome to the show.

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Speaker 3: Hi, Hey, was that a little weird you?

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Speaker 2: Rachel? Are you a little bit?

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Speaker 1: Yeah, we'll give you the friends and family discount on

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Speaker 1: the Costco size jug of textual Healing.

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Speaker 4: But I think it's really just vacillinting. Whatever.

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Speaker 1: But tell us a little bit about the situation that

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Speaker 1: you're dealing with and how we can help heal you textually.

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Speaker 1: Of course, a few.

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Speaker 2: Months ago I well, I kind of ended up stealing

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Speaker 2: my friend's boyfriend.

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Speaker 4: Did you say, do you say feeling stealing? Oh? Stealing feeling?

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Speaker 2: But it was an accident in a way.

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Speaker 1: How is it an accident?

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Speaker 2: Well, it all started at this party that we were at.

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Speaker 2: So he was complaining about their relationship with my friend,

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Speaker 2: and so I was giving him advice and you know,

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Speaker 2: helping him out. And you know, next thing I knew

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Speaker 2: we were hooking up.

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Speaker 4: Oh wow, you're like, what happened? Why are you acting

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Speaker 4: so innocent in that it was advice? Yeah, let me

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Speaker 4: give you advice. It's called my tongue.

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Speaker 2: Yeah okay, So it just like happened really fast, and

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Speaker 2: like I hear what you're all saying, Like I was

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Speaker 2: totally stupid about it. But then after like we were

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Speaker 2: really connected, and so we decided to start dating each other.

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Speaker 4: Wait, whoa wait, what when did you break up? Okay, wait, first.

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Speaker 1: We hang up. I'm sorry, but this is awful. Hold on, guy,

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Speaker 1: this is your friend. You hooked up with her boyfriend,

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Speaker 1: and then you and the boyfriend started dating.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, okay, when did your friend find out about all

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Speaker 3: of this?

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Speaker 2: So we decided to tell her together?

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Speaker 1: Oh god, it's even worse. Okay, this is different because

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Speaker 1: we've had people on the show before who said that

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Speaker 1: they had a moment of weakness and they accidentally hooked

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Speaker 1: up with a friend's boyfriend or friend's girlfriend, but to

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Speaker 1: actually start dating afterwards, Ye, yeah, that means that you

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Speaker 1: had to think about it and agree to go through

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Speaker 1: with that.

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Speaker 2: Hey, you guys don't really paint a good picture of this.

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Speaker 2: I mean I already told you that, you know, I was,

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Speaker 2: I was being stupid about.

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Speaker 4: The whole name right. Yeah, it's more of his fault too.

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Speaker 3: I mean, like what Jeff is saying is that, yes,

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Speaker 3: there's a moment of weakness and of idioticy that it

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Speaker 3: happened in the moment whatever, But then to continue the

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Speaker 3: relationship is a very well thought out choice, and you're

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Speaker 3: saying to your friend like your friendship doesn't mean anything

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Speaker 3: to me, Like this is more important.

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Speaker 1: It's a bigger betrayal.

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Speaker 2: I mean, after we told her, she kind of turned

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Speaker 2: away from me, and so I just felt like alone.

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Speaker 2: And so then he was there for me during the

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Speaker 2: breakup of that friendship as well, and so it just

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Speaker 2: felt like it was meant to be.

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Speaker 4: It was her fault that you had to fall into

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Speaker 4: the arms of her friend, and.

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Speaker 1: I could see what she's saying, like she felt like

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Speaker 1: she didn't have anywhere else to turn except to the

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Speaker 1: guy that was willing to have her.

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Speaker 2: I mean.

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Speaker 4: Maybe he's attractive. I mean, okay, he's awful hot. Because

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Speaker 4: you're a terrible friend.

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Speaker 1: Wow, okay, Brooke, I mean hooking up.

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Speaker 4: With someone's boyfriend makes you a terrible friend.

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Speaker 1: But she's also a listener to our show. So thank you.

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Speaker 1: I support your decisions.

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Speaker 4: Wait where are you at today? What is going on?

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Speaker 2: Okay, So it's been two months and it didn't work

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Speaker 2: out with him, of.

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Speaker 1: Course, shocker. I'm sorry. I'm sorry for your loss. No,

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Speaker 1: that does stink.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, it's just feel like everything was turning out

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Speaker 2: to just be about him and I now, looking back,

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Speaker 2: I know that it was wrong of me, and so

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Speaker 2: I reached out to try to reconnect and get back

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Speaker 2: to where we were before, and I sent her this

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Speaker 2: really long apology and I haven't heard back from her.

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Speaker 2: It's been a week.

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Speaker 1: Since you sent that text to your friend.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, and so I don't know what do I do?

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Speaker 2: What do I say to get her to respond to me?

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Speaker 1: Okay, Well, this is happening. I just googled it and

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Speaker 1: there's a survey by the website Plenty of Fish.

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Speaker 4: Okay.

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Speaker 1: They analyze sixty thousand messages to see which words are

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Speaker 1: the most likely to successfully start a conversation with a

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Speaker 1: woman's We're not hitting.

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Speaker 4: We're taking, we're trying to be friends.

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Speaker 1: No, this is just a word that gets women to respond.

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Speaker 4: What word is it?

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Speaker 1: So they found calling a woman beautiful in a text

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Speaker 1: message leads to a conversation almost half the time.

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Speaker 4: That was so weird beautiful right because you're hitting on them?

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Speaker 4: But I don't text Alexis and I'm like, good morn.

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Speaker 1: Okay, Brook, Okay, Brough, you give your better idea? What

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Speaker 1: do you say?

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Speaker 4: I don't know what to say. Honestly, I don't know

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Speaker 4: how to move.

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Speaker 1: Oh very nice, Okay, just put everybody else down. It

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Speaker 1: makes you feel better about not having any ideas.

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Speaker 3: I mean, like, if she wants to start a relationship

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Speaker 3: with this girl, I'm all supportive of it.

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Speaker 1: Whomen can call each other beautiful without it being a

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Speaker 1: sexual thing. Broke, I're not.

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Speaker 4: Calling people of beautiful.

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Speaker 1: Jeff Jeffery, you are beautiful. Yeah, jose you are lovely

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Speaker 1: and attractive man, it's not it doesn't go beyond that.

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Speaker 1: Gonna fix this and Rachel, this is about Rachel. Rachel,

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Speaker 1: what do you think?

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Speaker 2: Well? I think sounds kind of selfish about this whole thing.

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Speaker 2: I don't know why she's not helping me.

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Speaker 3: Okay, fine, you need to start with some inside joke.

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Speaker 3: It has to be something that you too find funny.

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Speaker 3: You gotta start with humor. Then you got to lead

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Speaker 3: off the top with something funny. She won't be able

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Speaker 3: to resist it.

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Speaker 1: Rachel, what do you think of that idea?

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Speaker 2: Can we go back to the beautiful one? I mean

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Speaker 2: that sounds a lot better.

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Speaker 3: Okay, Yeah, praise her for how pretty she isn't everything

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Speaker 3: to make up.

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Speaker 1: For it totally. Like, if you're just paying her a compliment,

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Speaker 1: then it's not even about you anymore. Rachel. It's just

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Speaker 1: about you trying to be a nice friend to her.

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Speaker 1: So if you say something along the lines of, hey,

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Speaker 1: I don't know what your friend's name is, but hey whatever,

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Speaker 1: I just want to say I really miss you. I

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Speaker 1: was looking at your Instagram today and I just think

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Speaker 1: you're so beautiful.

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Speaker 3: If we're gonna go Jeffrey's route, maybe you say you

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Speaker 3: know I think you're one of the most beautiful people

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Speaker 3: inside and out that I've ever met.

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Speaker 4: And I really miss you.

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Speaker 2: I like that.

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Speaker 4: Okay, you like it, that's all.

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Speaker 1: Let's try it, Rachel. Why don't Why don't you check

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Speaker 1: something out?

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Speaker 2: Okay, I really miss you, and I think you're the

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Speaker 2: most beautiful person I've ever met inside and out. And

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Speaker 2: I'll say, can we just FaceTime?

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Speaker 1: I don't. I don't think you're even there yet. You're

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Speaker 1: just trying to get a response.

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Speaker 4: Just do a heart.

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Speaker 3: I'll do a heart emoji, not broken heart.

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Speaker 2: Okay, and then that's to just keep it short.

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Speaker 1: Send All right. Look at that brooke. Even though you

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Speaker 1: didn't want to help her and you thought she was

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Speaker 1: a terrible person, you still managed to pull through for

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Speaker 1: one of our listeners. I'm proud of you.

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Speaker 4: I think some nostalgia would be good for the two

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Speaker 4: of them.

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Speaker 3: Okay, Well, maybe we brack some of the warm, fuzzy

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Speaker 3: feelings pre cheating on her voice.

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Speaker 1: Okay, Well, if she responds, maybe we can get to

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Speaker 1: that stuff. We're gonna play a song. We'll come back

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Speaker 1: and we'll see if your friend responded to you. Rachel.

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Speaker 1: When we continue textual healing, right after this.

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Speaker 2: All right, yeah, okay, yeah.

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Speaker 1: All right, hold on, if you're just tuning in, we're

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Speaker 1: in the middle of textual healing with one of our

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Speaker 1: listeners named Rachel. She wanted our help because a couple

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Speaker 1: months ago, she ended up kind of stealing her best

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Speaker 1: friend's boyfriend. Well yeah, yeah, I mean she hooked up

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Speaker 1: with him at a party. She says it was by accident,

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Speaker 1: but afterwards they ended up starting to date. Her friend

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Speaker 1: was not happy about that and decided to push Rachel

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Speaker 1: out of her life. Now it's been two months afterwards,

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Speaker 1: Rachel and the guy have since broken up, and she's

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Speaker 1: hoping that she can send a couple text messages and

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Speaker 1: get back into her friend's good graces, possibly rekindle their friendship.

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Speaker 1: And I don't want to go into a lot of

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Speaker 1: detail about this, but Brooke did throw up a lot

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Speaker 1: of roadblocks, said she did not want to help such

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Speaker 1: a terrible, awful person, and that she helps bad things

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Speaker 1: happen to her, well, something along those.

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Speaker 4: Lines, but have already happened to her.

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Speaker 1: That's true, and Tim Brook's credit, she came through with

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Speaker 1: a very good suggestion for Rachel and helped her craft

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Speaker 1: a nice text saying You're one of the most beautiful

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Speaker 1: people that I've ever known, and I love you or

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Speaker 1: something along those lines, right, Rachel, Yes.

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Speaker 2: Brick came through with a great suggestion.

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Speaker 1: Okay, so did your friend actually respond to the text?

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Speaker 2: She did?

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Speaker 4: Yeah, I'm nervous. I'm nervous to know what she said.

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Speaker 1: What she say?

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Speaker 2: The first one said, AWE thinks that's really sweet.

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Speaker 1: Two texts.

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Speaker 4: That's better than your Luckily I hate you was going

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Speaker 4: to she was going to write back.

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Speaker 1: Wow, Okay, what did the second one say?

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Speaker 2: The second one said, I saw your text and actually

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Speaker 2: heard you and Spence broke up. Can't say I was surprised.

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Speaker 1: Oh well, I mean read a little bit of a

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Speaker 1: jab at you too. Yeah, you deserve that jab Yeah.

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Speaker 3: I mean here's the thing, though, I don't think that.

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Speaker 3: I mean, what's our goal here? You want to hang

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Speaker 3: out with her? You just want to be friends with

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Speaker 3: her again.

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Speaker 2: I want my friend back. I mean, that's definitely the

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Speaker 2: whole will go here.

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Speaker 3: I mean I could say you guys someday laughing about

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Speaker 3: the whole Spencer thing, if we can get through this.

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Speaker 1: You went from You've really done a whole Sam.

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Speaker 3: Honestly, it was going to be a cheater anyway, so

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Speaker 3: you just made it happen sooner than later.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, but interesting.

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Speaker 1: Okay, So what do we say to your friend now?

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Speaker 4: I don't think we talk about him, is what I

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Speaker 4: was going to say.

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Speaker 3: I don't think you bring Spencer up again, And now

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Speaker 3: is not the time to laugh about it.

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Speaker 1: Okay, you don't want to joke like he wasn't good

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Speaker 1: in bed anyway? No, no, middle.

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Speaker 3: No, I think you leave all of that alone right now,

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Speaker 3: and you just talk about your relationship with her, just like, Hey,

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Speaker 3: I know an apology isn't enough. There's really, honestly nothing

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Speaker 3: I could ever do to make it up to you.

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Speaker 3: But if you can think of anything for you to

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Speaker 3: think of me as your friend again, I will do it.

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Speaker 2: That sounds good to me. I mean I think really

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Speaker 2: just about her and I and our friendship.

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Speaker 1: So okay, So you like that idea, Brooke, look at

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Speaker 1: that positive suggestions, Jeffrey.

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Speaker 4: I have lived a fairly successful life.

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Speaker 1: Well, I'm not questioning that. I was wondering if there's

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Speaker 1: a soul inside. I guess there is. Okay, So what

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Speaker 1: do you want her to say again?

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Speaker 3: Just basically like I know an apology isn't enough to

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Speaker 3: fix what I did. But I'm just asking, is there

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Speaker 3: anything I can do where you'll forgive me?

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Speaker 2: Okay? I know an apology is merely not enough. Is

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Speaker 2: there anything I can do?

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Speaker 4: Maybe even say?

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Speaker 3: You can even punch me in my face if that

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Speaker 3: makes you feel better.

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Speaker 4: I don't know why you want to get beat up.

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Speaker 4: You want her to be your friend. Maybe one good

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Speaker 4: punch and then it's gonna feel okay again. I don't know.

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Speaker 1: Why don't you cut me a little bit?

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Speaker 4: It'll make your laugh.

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Speaker 1: I think that'd be okay to Rachel's up to you.

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Speaker 1: It's up to you, Rachel if you want to use

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Speaker 1: that suggestion. But I like most of what Brooke was

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Speaker 1: saying before.

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Speaker 2: I was just gonna end it with that. I meant you.

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Speaker 1: Okay, okay, yeah, yeah, it's a little bit soft.

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Speaker 4: Yeah okay, a little fist emoji?

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Speaker 1: Yeah, didn't do it so funny?

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Speaker 4: Yeah?

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Speaker 1: All right? Did you send it?

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Speaker 2: They did?

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Speaker 1: Okay, all right, so we'll see if that works.

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Speaker 4: Would you forgive you if you were in her shoes?

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Speaker 2: Yeah? Yeah, yeah, of course. Man.

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Speaker 1: I hope that if I do something bad later in

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Speaker 1: my life, Brooke hates me. Too, because she gives the

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Speaker 1: best advice to people that she hates.

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Speaker 3: I know, people make mistakes, it's just that one is

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Speaker 3: it's up there.

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Speaker 1: It's up there on the rankings of biggest mistakes you

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Speaker 1: could make.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, that may just be a lifelong regret. Yeah, I'm

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Speaker 3: just gonna have to live with.

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Speaker 2: Okay, I just added another text about the sent You

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Speaker 2: sent another text, yeah, because I thought it was getting

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Speaker 2: too serious, So I wrote, I'll stand on the street

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Speaker 2: with a sign that says I stole my friend's boyfriend

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Speaker 2: and this is my punishment.

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Speaker 4: Why did you spell it out like that? Maybe I

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Speaker 4: don't like that.

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Speaker 2: Well, you said to have her punch me in the face.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, but remember how we're not ready to joke about

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Speaker 3: like anything to do with Spencer right now.

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Speaker 4: Like you should have just left that out.

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Speaker 1: We may have taken a step back with that text,

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Speaker 1: but I don't know.

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Speaker 3: And wouldn't you rather get punched in the face and

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Speaker 3: have to stand out with a side.

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Speaker 1: You're a mother hour.

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Speaker 4: Standing on a ramp. I would take the swift hit.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, he responded.

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Speaker 1: She responded, Oh okay, what'd you say?

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Speaker 2: Okay, so it says maybe if you shaved your head.

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Speaker 4: Mark, I told you that punch sounded better and better.

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Speaker 1: I tell you she wants you to shave your head

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Speaker 1: in order for the When.

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Speaker 3: You say i'll do anything, and you give her, you

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Speaker 3: know what, she probably has a new boyfriend and she

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Speaker 3: doesn't want the new boyfriend to be attracted to you.

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Speaker 1: She's thinking ahead.

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Speaker 2: I don't know. Maybe she's joking. I mean it's hard

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Speaker 2: to tell her to text. I mean she did add

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Speaker 2: one of those like bald head emojis.

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Speaker 1: That say, lol, you are so funny. This is why

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Speaker 1: I miss you so much.

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Speaker 4: That's not bad, and that's not bad. But you want

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Speaker 4: to get her to say and then you say, oh,

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Speaker 4: I'm being real or no, say you really want me

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Speaker 4: to go full Britney spears.

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Speaker 1: Because I'll do it.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, No, don't put in because I'll do it unless

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Speaker 3: you'll do it, Will you do it?

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Speaker 1: Do anything?

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Speaker 2: Yeah? Yeah, I'll do it.

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Speaker 1: Yeah. Whoa. Even if you don't do it, you could

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Speaker 1: always photoshop a picture of yourself bald and that would

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Speaker 1: be close enough.

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Speaker 2: No, I would do it. I mean I think I

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Speaker 2: should be punished somehow and like it'll grow back.

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Speaker 4: Hey, I'm with you. I wouldn't cut my hair for anyone.

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Speaker 1: I think you just do it and you see how

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Speaker 1: she responds to it before you. This isn't a contract.

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Speaker 1: It doesn't mean you have to. It's just we're trying

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Speaker 1: to get a good response from her or.

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Speaker 4: Get the clippers out.

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Speaker 1: Right.

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Speaker 4: Now, let's do it and send her a picture.

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Speaker 1: No, let's calm down a little bit text first, All right,

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Speaker 1: go ahead and send that.

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Speaker 3: And I sent it, Okay, so basically said, you're so funny,

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Speaker 3: that's why I missed you, and I'll shave my head

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Speaker 3: if you really want me to.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, that's what I wrote. I mean, I.

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Speaker 1: Well, this is the ultimate test of your friendship, I

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Speaker 1: think on her end, because now the ball is in

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Speaker 1: her court to do the right thing and not make

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Speaker 1: you do something terrible to yourself, right.

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Speaker 3: Because then, like what if you do it and she's

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Speaker 3: just doing it to punish you and then never actually

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Speaker 3: wants to be your friend again.

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Speaker 1: Well she may deserve that, yeah, I mean in a

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Speaker 1: dark way, and then morality will be back on Rachel's side.

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Speaker 4: You should just shave the guy's head together.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, she just responded again.

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Speaker 4: Okay, what does it say?

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Speaker 2: He says, O, MG, I was just kidding. And then

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Speaker 2: she added a laugh of oj.

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Speaker 3: O, she is a much better friend than.

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Speaker 1: You, which in a really bad position. That was sketchy

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Speaker 1: though for a second.

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Speaker 4: Yeah did she say anything else? You guys are laughing together.

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Speaker 4: That's good.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, yeah, no, but she did say more. She said, besides,

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Speaker 2: I was going to call you Spence and I cooked

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Speaker 2: up last night with an eyes wide open abogie.

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Speaker 4: Oh my god, you.

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Speaker 1: Know get wait Spence.

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Speaker 4: The X of both of them now they're rotating back

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Speaker 4: and forth.

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Speaker 1: Right now.

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Speaker 2: And then she wrote, were even question mark?

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Speaker 1: Oh she did it to get back at you.

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Speaker 4: Wow, say just go with yes. Yes, sounds good. I mean,

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Speaker 4: are you upset that she hooked up with Spence?

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Speaker 2: No, I'm I'm not mad. I mean it's like you

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Speaker 2: guys said, I probably deserved it, and I'll just seef

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Speaker 2: she wants to hang out this Saturday.

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Speaker 3: Okay, Okay, that a person easy one.

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Speaker 1: We did, all right there. I want to text Spence though,

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Speaker 1: and be like, what is your secret? Man? You got

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Speaker 1: some magic going on?

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Speaker 3: Freaking Jeffrey in the morning, like