1
00:00:01,280 --> 00:00:05,320
Speaker 1: Please make sure to support the kid at www dot

2
00:00:05,360 --> 00:00:10,080
Speaker 1: patreon dot com Forward Slash the PSD Podcast. There are

3
00:00:10,119 --> 00:00:13,319
Speaker 1: five different tiers were incentives, so please make sure to

4
00:00:13,400 --> 00:00:16,400
Speaker 1: hold me down and not hold me up. Y'all know

5
00:00:16,480 --> 00:00:18,680
Speaker 1: I'm out here just during the Lord's work, child, so

6
00:00:18,840 --> 00:00:25,440
Speaker 1: please enjoy this week's inspiring episode and until next time later. Welcome.

7
00:00:27,000 --> 00:01:02,200
Speaker 1: You are now listening to the Professional Kid, Hey, Professional

8
00:01:02,240 --> 00:01:05,480
Speaker 1: home Girls and nass your girl eben a from the

9
00:01:05,520 --> 00:01:09,320
Speaker 1: PSD podcast. The only place where you would hear interviews

10
00:01:09,360 --> 00:01:12,360
Speaker 1: from women an honously on stories that were enlightened and

11
00:01:12,440 --> 00:01:15,240
Speaker 1: expand on taboo topics. Now if you hear someone that

12
00:01:15,280 --> 00:01:18,800
Speaker 1: sounds familiar, mind ABIs to page you child. If you

13
00:01:18,880 --> 00:01:22,520
Speaker 1: like the PSD podcast, please rate, review and subscribe on

14
00:01:22,600 --> 00:01:26,520
Speaker 1: Apple podcasts, please five star reviews only hold me down,

15
00:01:26,560 --> 00:01:29,000
Speaker 1: don't hold me up. You can connect with me on

16
00:01:29,080 --> 00:01:32,240
Speaker 1: Instagram at the Professional home Girl, at the PSC podcast

17
00:01:32,360 --> 00:01:35,280
Speaker 1: and last not Least at and a Beauty. If you're

18
00:01:35,319 --> 00:01:38,600
Speaker 1: all caught up with episodes, listen to bonus episodes by

19
00:01:38,600 --> 00:01:42,560
Speaker 1: supporting the PSC podcast Patreon account. To support, please visit

20
00:01:43,200 --> 00:01:48,040
Speaker 1: www dot patreon dot com Forward Slash the PSD Podcast. Now,

21
00:01:48,080 --> 00:01:49,800
Speaker 1: please keep in mind that all of my guests are

22
00:01:49,840 --> 00:01:53,480
Speaker 1: an honest So let's begin this week's episode. So on

23
00:01:53,560 --> 00:01:56,240
Speaker 1: these Simper ten two thousand and five, a plane fresh

24
00:01:56,320 --> 00:01:59,280
Speaker 1: and Nigeria killing one hundred and seven out of one

25
00:01:59,760 --> 00:02:03,240
Speaker 1: nine passengers. Our guest is one of two survivors from

26
00:02:03,280 --> 00:02:05,400
Speaker 1: the accident, and she is the only student from her

27
00:02:05,440 --> 00:02:07,800
Speaker 1: class that survived. So I want to say thank you

28
00:02:07,840 --> 00:02:09,760
Speaker 1: so much to my guests by sharing her story on

29
00:02:09,800 --> 00:02:13,919
Speaker 1: a PhD podcast. So to my guests, how are you doing?

30
00:02:14,880 --> 00:02:18,160
Speaker 1: I am doing great, so much for having me, thank you,

31
00:02:18,240 --> 00:02:20,800
Speaker 1: thank you. UM. How has the PIN been been training you?

32
00:02:23,160 --> 00:02:27,720
Speaker 1: It's been rough. It's been rough, like for someone like

33
00:02:27,800 --> 00:02:32,200
Speaker 1: me who UM operates primarily through like traveling and you know,

34
00:02:32,520 --> 00:02:35,040
Speaker 1: being in contact with people from all over the world,

35
00:02:35,600 --> 00:02:38,640
Speaker 1: you're shutting down airports and like traveling has just like

36
00:02:38,760 --> 00:02:42,800
Speaker 1: really affected my entire schedule for the year, like honestly,

37
00:02:43,200 --> 00:02:46,079
Speaker 1: So it's been a big adjustment for sure, for myself,

38
00:02:46,080 --> 00:02:48,080
Speaker 1: for my team, and just trying to figure out what

39
00:02:48,120 --> 00:02:50,840
Speaker 1: we can do while we're at home. Basically it's been

40
00:02:50,880 --> 00:02:55,680
Speaker 1: a huge adaptation process. But not just for me obviously, No, Yeah,

41
00:02:55,720 --> 00:02:58,639
Speaker 1: because I know before the pandemic happen you travel a lot.

42
00:02:59,600 --> 00:03:02,240
Speaker 1: I don't lot of things in different spas, in different countries.

43
00:03:02,240 --> 00:03:05,160
Speaker 1: Back only imagine how this is affecting you big time.

44
00:03:05,240 --> 00:03:07,320
Speaker 1: Like I feel at first it was like going there

45
00:03:07,320 --> 00:03:10,920
Speaker 1: crazy just being in the same place all the time,

46
00:03:11,360 --> 00:03:14,560
Speaker 1: you know. But yeah, it's it went on for long

47
00:03:14,680 --> 00:03:16,680
Speaker 1: enough that we all had no choice but to kind of,

48
00:03:16,720 --> 00:03:20,320
Speaker 1: you know, adjust to this new normal basically. So that's

49
00:03:20,320 --> 00:03:23,720
Speaker 1: what it is. Yeah, Um, so the fifteen year anniversary

50
00:03:23,760 --> 00:03:27,480
Speaker 1: is coming up. How does that make you feel? Well,

51
00:03:28,919 --> 00:03:32,040
Speaker 1: it's interesting because you know, every year when that time

52
00:03:32,080 --> 00:03:34,320
Speaker 1: of year comes by, it always kind of feels a

53
00:03:34,360 --> 00:03:38,200
Speaker 1: little weird, just because you know, I get this moment

54
00:03:38,280 --> 00:03:41,600
Speaker 1: where I I have this moment of um, I guess,

55
00:03:41,720 --> 00:03:45,560
Speaker 1: not really realization, but kind of clarity about the fact that,

56
00:03:45,600 --> 00:03:48,520
Speaker 1: you know, my life really is like a gift and

57
00:03:49,040 --> 00:03:52,720
Speaker 1: like I've lived one more year that would never have happened,

58
00:03:52,800 --> 00:03:56,080
Speaker 1: you know, if I didn't somehow survive that day. You know.

59
00:03:56,160 --> 00:03:59,840
Speaker 1: So every year it's always a like a new realization

60
00:04:00,040 --> 00:04:04,120
Speaker 1: of the blessing that life really is. And it really

61
00:04:04,160 --> 00:04:07,360
Speaker 1: doesn't feel in different honestly, just knowing that I'm coming

62
00:04:07,400 --> 00:04:09,080
Speaker 1: to the fifteen year mark. I think the one that

63
00:04:09,160 --> 00:04:12,200
Speaker 1: really hit me was the ten year mark for some reason. Yeah.

64
00:04:12,360 --> 00:04:15,960
Speaker 1: So yeah, like um, in twenty that was like like,

65
00:04:16,000 --> 00:04:17,880
Speaker 1: I don't know, just ten years a decade just like

66
00:04:18,000 --> 00:04:20,880
Speaker 1: had more like it was very milestone, like you know,

67
00:04:21,000 --> 00:04:24,600
Speaker 1: and I was able to actually go home for the

68
00:04:24,640 --> 00:04:27,440
Speaker 1: anniversary because he did a celebration and like a ceremony

69
00:04:27,480 --> 00:04:30,239
Speaker 1: back home in Nigeria with the parents of the kids

70
00:04:30,240 --> 00:04:33,520
Speaker 1: that has that had to be deep it was. It

71
00:04:33,560 --> 00:04:36,000
Speaker 1: was crazy and also my first time going back to

72
00:04:36,080 --> 00:04:39,280
Speaker 1: Nigeria after leaving since the accident. So there were all

73
00:04:39,320 --> 00:04:41,440
Speaker 1: these different things that happened at the same time, you

74
00:04:41,480 --> 00:04:46,600
Speaker 1: know that made that extremely like just significant, you know,

75
00:04:46,760 --> 00:04:50,040
Speaker 1: um in the way that we we kind of honored

76
00:04:50,520 --> 00:04:52,920
Speaker 1: those that passed away that day. So I think nothing

77
00:04:52,960 --> 00:04:56,560
Speaker 1: can really talk that maybe twenty years, but fifteen fifteen

78
00:04:56,640 --> 00:04:59,880
Speaker 1: just feels like one more mouths done, one more year

79
00:05:00,120 --> 00:05:03,599
Speaker 1: um of just being thankful, you know, and so um,

80
00:05:03,640 --> 00:05:05,120
Speaker 1: I mean if I can be home for that too,

81
00:05:05,160 --> 00:05:08,560
Speaker 1: that would be awesome. But being able to kind of

82
00:05:08,600 --> 00:05:11,440
Speaker 1: express how I feel about just being here right now

83
00:05:11,480 --> 00:05:14,080
Speaker 1: and living for those that passed away, doing that every year,

84
00:05:14,520 --> 00:05:15,880
Speaker 1: I think it's going to be the same for the

85
00:05:15,920 --> 00:05:22,240
Speaker 1: fifteen year mark, Does it feel like they went back fast? No? Actually,

86
00:05:22,720 --> 00:05:25,479
Speaker 1: what I think about it, I feel like it sounds

87
00:05:25,520 --> 00:05:28,479
Speaker 1: like a lot of time, you know, Honestly, yeah, yeah,

88
00:05:28,640 --> 00:05:30,760
Speaker 1: it really does. Like fifteen years is not like that's

89
00:05:30,760 --> 00:05:33,000
Speaker 1: a that's a whole teenager, like that's a long time.

90
00:05:35,880 --> 00:05:40,839
Speaker 1: But honestly, no, because like every most of these years,

91
00:05:40,920 --> 00:05:45,599
Speaker 1: like within each year, I've had extremely significant things happen,

92
00:05:45,720 --> 00:05:48,960
Speaker 1: like I remember different. There are many different things that

93
00:05:49,040 --> 00:05:51,400
Speaker 1: happen in each year that make them stand out. And

94
00:05:51,440 --> 00:05:53,720
Speaker 1: I know that these things like they took so much

95
00:05:53,760 --> 00:05:56,279
Speaker 1: time like to get to these together, Like so much

96
00:05:56,279 --> 00:05:59,000
Speaker 1: time passed while these things were happening. That like I

97
00:05:59,320 --> 00:06:01,680
Speaker 1: don't really like it was like a flash, like a

98
00:06:01,839 --> 00:06:04,719
Speaker 1: flashed by quick. You know. I feel like I feel

99
00:06:04,800 --> 00:06:08,279
Speaker 1: I remember every moment. I remember everything that it took

100
00:06:08,279 --> 00:06:11,080
Speaker 1: for those moments to come and go. So it really

101
00:06:11,120 --> 00:06:13,560
Speaker 1: when I think about fifteen it sounds about right, like

102
00:06:13,680 --> 00:06:15,520
Speaker 1: a lot of time has passed and a lot of

103
00:06:15,520 --> 00:06:18,400
Speaker 1: things have happened and they needed like this amount of

104
00:06:18,400 --> 00:06:21,720
Speaker 1: time to happen. So it doesn't really feel like that's fascinating.

105
00:06:22,880 --> 00:06:25,240
Speaker 1: You know. When I was telling people about your story

106
00:06:25,480 --> 00:06:27,760
Speaker 1: and it was like wait, what And it was like, oh, yeah,

107
00:06:27,880 --> 00:06:33,560
Speaker 1: she's definitely like an angel. Like I was like, I

108
00:06:33,640 --> 00:06:38,040
Speaker 1: was like, I like, her story is so inspirational. We're

109
00:06:38,040 --> 00:06:40,800
Speaker 1: gonna get more into it. But like when I found

110
00:06:40,839 --> 00:06:42,400
Speaker 1: you and I did my research time you, I was

111
00:06:42,480 --> 00:06:45,480
Speaker 1: just like and I remember watching you on America's Got Talent.

112
00:06:45,520 --> 00:06:48,760
Speaker 1: What you gonna talk about? I was like wow, Like

113
00:06:49,080 --> 00:06:52,599
Speaker 1: I was just truly inspired, Like God got something for

114
00:06:52,680 --> 00:07:00,640
Speaker 1: this girl. Like amen and amen to that. Yeah, So

115
00:07:00,680 --> 00:07:03,600
Speaker 1: let's start in the beginning. So when you woke up

116
00:07:03,640 --> 00:07:09,240
Speaker 1: on the Sumberton Day, No, no, not at all. I

117
00:07:09,279 --> 00:07:11,760
Speaker 1: remember that day being completely normal. But you know, it's

118
00:07:11,800 --> 00:07:14,120
Speaker 1: so funny because when I talked to my friends about

119
00:07:14,160 --> 00:07:17,200
Speaker 1: this day, some of them have like the weirdest stories,

120
00:07:17,200 --> 00:07:19,640
Speaker 1: Like they tell me stuff that like made like, I know,

121
00:07:19,760 --> 00:07:21,760
Speaker 1: one friend, she felt like that day was just the

122
00:07:21,800 --> 00:07:24,680
Speaker 1: weirdest day. You know, she has a completely different memory

123
00:07:24,680 --> 00:07:27,040
Speaker 1: of that day from me. Me. I just remembered being

124
00:07:27,040 --> 00:07:29,480
Speaker 1: a regular day. I remember being all of my feelings

125
00:07:29,480 --> 00:07:32,080
Speaker 1: because I was going home for holiday, but it wasn't

126
00:07:32,080 --> 00:07:33,440
Speaker 1: really going to be a holiday because I was going

127
00:07:33,480 --> 00:07:35,360
Speaker 1: to be studying for the s A t S throughout,

128
00:07:35,440 --> 00:07:37,880
Speaker 1: So like I knew like going home was just gonna

129
00:07:37,960 --> 00:07:40,080
Speaker 1: be work waiting for me, you know, And so I

130
00:07:40,120 --> 00:07:42,160
Speaker 1: remember just thinking like that was all that was in

131
00:07:42,200 --> 00:07:43,840
Speaker 1: my mind that day when I woke up home. We

132
00:07:44,160 --> 00:07:46,920
Speaker 1: woke up really early too, because you have to wake

133
00:07:47,000 --> 00:07:48,680
Speaker 1: up early so you can start, you know, getting to

134
00:07:48,680 --> 00:07:50,400
Speaker 1: the bus that takes you to the airport, and then

135
00:07:50,400 --> 00:07:52,480
Speaker 1: we bore the plane to go home. It's the whole day.

136
00:07:52,960 --> 00:07:55,680
Speaker 1: So um, yeah, we just woke up early. I went

137
00:07:55,720 --> 00:07:59,320
Speaker 1: to the the school cafeteria with my friend. Um. I

138
00:07:59,360 --> 00:08:01,200
Speaker 1: was with one of my closest friends. We kind of

139
00:08:01,240 --> 00:08:03,520
Speaker 1: we travel back and forth together because we live in

140
00:08:03,640 --> 00:08:05,760
Speaker 1: We take the same plane home, so so we just

141
00:08:05,920 --> 00:08:08,960
Speaker 1: we we stick together basically on days of travel. So

142
00:08:09,320 --> 00:08:11,320
Speaker 1: I was with her. We we ate, we got our

143
00:08:11,320 --> 00:08:14,400
Speaker 1: tickets from our teachers, um, and then we put our

144
00:08:14,400 --> 00:08:16,480
Speaker 1: stuff on the bus and then we got on the bus.

145
00:08:16,600 --> 00:08:19,800
Speaker 1: We went to the airport, and I just remember it

146
00:08:19,960 --> 00:08:23,440
Speaker 1: being a very regular day. I really just don't think anything.

147
00:08:23,680 --> 00:08:27,840
Speaker 1: The weather was fine, like from my from my end,

148
00:08:27,880 --> 00:08:31,240
Speaker 1: like it was a sunny, hot day as usual, and

149
00:08:31,280 --> 00:08:33,640
Speaker 1: we got to the airport, we sat down flat was delayed,

150
00:08:34,080 --> 00:08:35,520
Speaker 1: so we hung out a little bit like in the

151
00:08:35,800 --> 00:08:38,040
Speaker 1: in the lounge area of the airport. We got some

152
00:08:38,080 --> 00:08:40,880
Speaker 1: food and we were just chilling. We're just chilling and

153
00:08:40,920 --> 00:08:43,000
Speaker 1: just waiting. We talked, my friend and I we talked

154
00:08:43,000 --> 00:08:45,280
Speaker 1: a lot about like, you know, s A T S

155
00:08:45,360 --> 00:08:47,240
Speaker 1: in our future, I mean, just how that was like

156
00:08:47,320 --> 00:08:50,040
Speaker 1: looming over our heads, where our plans were, and then

157
00:08:50,080 --> 00:08:51,800
Speaker 1: we just talked about some other random stuff, you know,

158
00:08:52,559 --> 00:08:55,320
Speaker 1: and y'all, she was sixteen years old when this happened,

159
00:08:55,400 --> 00:08:57,160
Speaker 1: So he was a singer in high school. I was

160
00:08:57,160 --> 00:09:00,199
Speaker 1: a senior in high school, exactly. Yeah, so that's that's

161
00:09:00,200 --> 00:09:03,480
Speaker 1: what was going on. So like, yeah, I mean about

162
00:09:03,480 --> 00:09:05,719
Speaker 1: I think three hours passed. Maybe we were We were

163
00:09:05,720 --> 00:09:07,760
Speaker 1: in the airport for a while because flights typically getting

164
00:09:07,760 --> 00:09:10,520
Speaker 1: really like batterly delayed in that area. So so we

165
00:09:11,040 --> 00:09:14,640
Speaker 1: the plane finally arrived, We got up, packed our stuff up,

166
00:09:14,679 --> 00:09:17,079
Speaker 1: and we got a line. We got to the ticket counter,

167
00:09:17,280 --> 00:09:20,040
Speaker 1: we went past, we got on the um runway, we

168
00:09:20,080 --> 00:09:23,800
Speaker 1: started getting to the plane, got on the plane and

169
00:09:24,200 --> 00:09:25,920
Speaker 1: I sat next to I was in then aisle seat,

170
00:09:26,120 --> 00:09:28,280
Speaker 1: right next to my friend. She was altering an aalyca.

171
00:09:28,360 --> 00:09:30,600
Speaker 1: So we're next to each other. So that was good,

172
00:09:30,720 --> 00:09:32,199
Speaker 1: you know, it was happy we could travel next to

173
00:09:32,240 --> 00:09:36,160
Speaker 1: each other. I remember, um, yeah, I remember like we

174
00:09:36,280 --> 00:09:38,440
Speaker 1: boarded and everything was fine. We were in the front

175
00:09:38,480 --> 00:09:41,079
Speaker 1: of the plane, so like right like the front part

176
00:09:41,120 --> 00:09:44,280
Speaker 1: of coach that's where we're sitting, and then the flight

177
00:09:44,520 --> 00:09:47,160
Speaker 1: kind of took off and yeah. But one thing I

178
00:09:47,240 --> 00:09:49,560
Speaker 1: know that you said throughout your interviews was you knows

179
00:09:49,600 --> 00:09:52,800
Speaker 1: that you didn't have a window seat. Yep. That's something

180
00:09:52,920 --> 00:09:55,400
Speaker 1: that I remember not being happy about. Yeah, because like

181
00:09:55,600 --> 00:09:57,719
Speaker 1: usually my mom always like takes care to book a

182
00:09:57,760 --> 00:10:00,000
Speaker 1: window seat because I like like looking out the window

183
00:10:00,120 --> 00:10:02,160
Speaker 1: when the you know, the flooding sins up in the air.

184
00:10:02,480 --> 00:10:05,000
Speaker 1: So I like, even now that's something that I've carried

185
00:10:05,080 --> 00:10:07,679
Speaker 1: over till now, like I just prefer it. Yes, I

186
00:10:07,760 --> 00:10:09,400
Speaker 1: remember just thinking I'm gonna give her a hard time

187
00:10:09,400 --> 00:10:11,839
Speaker 1: when I get home, for sure, because I don't know

188
00:10:11,920 --> 00:10:15,720
Speaker 1: why she didn't do this, Like like I get angry when, Yeah,

189
00:10:15,920 --> 00:10:17,880
Speaker 1: I was telling you, I wasn't like I was already

190
00:10:17,920 --> 00:10:20,480
Speaker 1: my feelings coming home, like and you know, studying and

191
00:10:20,520 --> 00:10:22,600
Speaker 1: all that, I'm like I can't even look at the window,

192
00:10:22,679 --> 00:10:25,800
Speaker 1: like dang, you know, like I was. I was not happy. No, Yeah,

193
00:10:25,840 --> 00:10:28,599
Speaker 1: I wasn't happy, but like I was happy that I

194
00:10:28,640 --> 00:10:30,599
Speaker 1: could at least sitting next to my friend, so that

195
00:10:30,720 --> 00:10:32,880
Speaker 1: was good. So um, but I remember like we didn't

196
00:10:32,920 --> 00:10:35,280
Speaker 1: really talked how much through the flight because we were

197
00:10:35,360 --> 00:10:39,000
Speaker 1: so tired, like we just slept. And I remember, so

198
00:10:39,120 --> 00:10:41,040
Speaker 1: there wasn't there was a lady obviously I didn't know,

199
00:10:41,120 --> 00:10:44,120
Speaker 1: like she was sitting in the window seat. Um that

200
00:10:44,360 --> 00:10:49,000
Speaker 1: was next to me, and um, the flight typically takes

201
00:10:49,000 --> 00:10:51,319
Speaker 1: about an hour and a half, right, so um, it's

202
00:10:51,400 --> 00:10:54,680
Speaker 1: usually I mean obviously uneventful. You don't want anything happening,

203
00:10:54,720 --> 00:10:57,560
Speaker 1: you know, during the flight anyway, So that's what I remember.

204
00:10:57,559 --> 00:10:59,920
Speaker 1: I remember just being a regular flight, like for the

205
00:11:00,160 --> 00:11:04,880
Speaker 1: first hour and like let's say five minutes, everything was fine,

206
00:11:05,280 --> 00:11:07,439
Speaker 1: you know, and then the pilot makes the announcement that

207
00:11:07,600 --> 00:11:10,079
Speaker 1: we will be landing in the airport pretty soon, like

208
00:11:10,160 --> 00:11:12,559
Speaker 1: in fifteen twenty minutes, and so we should, you know,

209
00:11:12,640 --> 00:11:14,880
Speaker 1: buckle our seatbelts and you know, just get ready for

210
00:11:15,040 --> 00:11:19,439
Speaker 1: the descent. And yeah, so still still regular stuff. So

211
00:11:19,559 --> 00:11:22,080
Speaker 1: when the everything, it's like a time for the worst. Yeah,

212
00:11:22,320 --> 00:11:25,080
Speaker 1: so right around this time the pilot made the announcement,

213
00:11:25,840 --> 00:11:29,640
Speaker 1: then the turbulence started, and I remember not thinking anything

214
00:11:29,679 --> 00:11:32,960
Speaker 1: about it because turbulence happened it was normal, strange, that's

215
00:11:33,000 --> 00:11:37,200
Speaker 1: normal exactly. But then it started getting like way like dramatic,

216
00:11:37,320 --> 00:11:39,839
Speaker 1: like more exaggerated. And I remember at this point like

217
00:11:40,280 --> 00:11:42,640
Speaker 1: looking out, like looking out the window and not being

218
00:11:42,640 --> 00:11:44,640
Speaker 1: able to see much because of where I was sitting,

219
00:11:44,880 --> 00:11:46,599
Speaker 1: but also not being able to see because there was

220
00:11:46,640 --> 00:11:49,920
Speaker 1: just very cloudy, like thick clouds. But again, like you know,

221
00:11:50,040 --> 00:11:52,480
Speaker 1: when you're that's what causes turbulence, and when the when

222
00:11:52,480 --> 00:11:54,720
Speaker 1: the plane is going through the clouds, then you can't

223
00:11:54,760 --> 00:11:57,120
Speaker 1: really see anything because you're going through the clouds, you know,

224
00:11:57,520 --> 00:11:59,599
Speaker 1: So like that's that's why the plane was shaking. So

225
00:12:00,120 --> 00:12:02,559
Speaker 1: I was still like rationalizing everything in my mind, like

226
00:12:02,760 --> 00:12:05,160
Speaker 1: I and no one was saying anything. No one was

227
00:12:05,240 --> 00:12:07,160
Speaker 1: panicking yet because we just thought it was it was

228
00:12:07,240 --> 00:12:10,160
Speaker 1: just it was going to be fine, yeah, But then

229
00:12:10,280 --> 00:12:12,559
Speaker 1: just kept going and he started getting really bad, and

230
00:12:12,600 --> 00:12:15,160
Speaker 1: I just remember like my heart starting to count, and

231
00:12:15,320 --> 00:12:17,559
Speaker 1: I just know that at that point everyone on the

232
00:12:17,600 --> 00:12:21,080
Speaker 1: plane was kind of like tense. There was just an

233
00:12:21,160 --> 00:12:24,160
Speaker 1: air in the in the plane where like we all

234
00:12:24,320 --> 00:12:27,560
Speaker 1: just knew at the same time, like Okay, something's up,

235
00:12:27,880 --> 00:12:31,360
Speaker 1: this is not normal. And then like something happened and

236
00:12:31,400 --> 00:12:32,800
Speaker 1: then the Lydia at the back of the plane like

237
00:12:32,840 --> 00:12:35,520
Speaker 1: they was just to scream, like a woman screaming like what,

238
00:12:35,800 --> 00:12:37,719
Speaker 1: like is this plane trying to land? Like what's And

239
00:12:37,760 --> 00:12:39,559
Speaker 1: then when she said when she did that, like that

240
00:12:39,720 --> 00:12:42,960
Speaker 1: kind of triggered the panic, so everyone started like she transferred.

241
00:12:43,559 --> 00:12:47,200
Speaker 1: Everybody transferred it and everyone she she basically gave voice

242
00:12:47,280 --> 00:12:51,280
Speaker 1: to what everyone was like dreading inside they like their hearts.

243
00:12:51,600 --> 00:12:54,160
Speaker 1: And I remember just sitting there not saying this thing.

244
00:12:54,320 --> 00:12:58,760
Speaker 1: I was just in shock, like what I was literally

245
00:12:58,840 --> 00:13:02,400
Speaker 1: not even like I don't even remember feeling like afraid.

246
00:13:02,520 --> 00:13:06,240
Speaker 1: It was more like awe and confusion, like is this really?

247
00:13:06,440 --> 00:13:08,079
Speaker 1: Like what is this? Like? It was like I was

248
00:13:08,200 --> 00:13:13,920
Speaker 1: watching me sitting there and trying to make sense of

249
00:13:13,960 --> 00:13:16,719
Speaker 1: what was happening. It was like the movie like like

250
00:13:16,880 --> 00:13:19,600
Speaker 1: this doesn't happen. You know, this doesn't happen in real life.

251
00:13:19,640 --> 00:13:21,760
Speaker 1: This is just not like this. So I didn't even

252
00:13:21,760 --> 00:13:24,240
Speaker 1: get a chance to really reconcile with reality like this

253
00:13:24,440 --> 00:13:27,640
Speaker 1: was actually reality. I didn't really understand what was going on.

254
00:13:27,920 --> 00:13:30,920
Speaker 1: And I remember looking on to my friend like to

255
00:13:31,080 --> 00:13:33,000
Speaker 1: my right, and she was looking at me and we're

256
00:13:33,000 --> 00:13:35,120
Speaker 1: just like what, Like she was like what the hell? Like,

257
00:13:35,240 --> 00:13:37,319
Speaker 1: what what is this? She didn't stand there, she was

258
00:13:37,360 --> 00:13:40,880
Speaker 1: just staring at me, and I remember, I remember one

259
00:13:40,920 --> 00:13:42,680
Speaker 1: of the last thing I remember is holding her hand

260
00:13:43,160 --> 00:13:45,920
Speaker 1: and we were just like squeezing each other's hands, and

261
00:13:46,080 --> 00:13:47,760
Speaker 1: one of us said maybe we should pray. Like we

262
00:13:47,800 --> 00:13:49,559
Speaker 1: didn't know what to do. We didn't know what to like,

263
00:13:49,600 --> 00:13:53,120
Speaker 1: we didn't know what was happening. And I feel like

264
00:13:53,200 --> 00:13:55,480
Speaker 1: it was me because I remember it echoing inside my

265
00:13:55,559 --> 00:13:57,439
Speaker 1: head like I didn't really remember, like I remember like

266
00:13:57,880 --> 00:14:00,400
Speaker 1: hearing myself say the words it was. It was a

267
00:14:00,559 --> 00:14:03,880
Speaker 1: very strange feeling. And then before anything else could happen

268
00:14:04,000 --> 00:14:06,000
Speaker 1: or anything else could be said, there was this like

269
00:14:06,280 --> 00:14:10,600
Speaker 1: loud like metal scraping, like screeching sound that just kind

270
00:14:10,600 --> 00:14:13,319
Speaker 1: of filled my brain, like filled my head and like

271
00:14:13,480 --> 00:14:17,800
Speaker 1: just jarred my senses. And then I guess I must

272
00:14:17,840 --> 00:14:20,560
Speaker 1: have blacked out at that point because my next vivid

273
00:14:20,640 --> 00:14:23,600
Speaker 1: memory from that is opening my eyes and I was

274
00:14:23,680 --> 00:14:26,320
Speaker 1: in the hospital bed and I was in South Africa

275
00:14:26,480 --> 00:14:28,840
Speaker 1: and five weeks Sad passed. Yeah, And now when I

276
00:14:28,960 --> 00:14:30,760
Speaker 1: was reading it, they said that the doctor said that

277
00:14:30,840 --> 00:14:33,560
Speaker 1: you had a thirty percent chance of surviving when you

278
00:14:33,840 --> 00:14:39,320
Speaker 1: arrive at the hospital. Correct, when up what happened when

279
00:14:39,360 --> 00:14:44,320
Speaker 1: I woke up? Basically, I so a lot had happened,

280
00:14:44,360 --> 00:14:47,480
Speaker 1: so five weeks had passed right, and and I when

281
00:14:47,480 --> 00:14:49,240
Speaker 1: I woke up. The thing about when I woke up

282
00:14:49,360 --> 00:14:52,040
Speaker 1: was that I knew. I knew where I was, I

283
00:14:52,160 --> 00:14:56,160
Speaker 1: knew what had happened. I knew didn't Yeah, I knew details.

284
00:14:56,440 --> 00:14:59,720
Speaker 1: And the reason for that is while I was in

285
00:14:59,800 --> 00:15:02,080
Speaker 1: the coma. Because I was in a coma for five weeks.

286
00:15:02,120 --> 00:15:04,680
Speaker 1: While I was in a coma, my mom had been

287
00:15:04,720 --> 00:15:07,520
Speaker 1: talking to me, and I would hear her voice, like

288
00:15:07,920 --> 00:15:10,360
Speaker 1: even in my subconscious I would hear her talk like

289
00:15:10,480 --> 00:15:13,760
Speaker 1: talking to me and telling me like what had happened

290
00:15:14,080 --> 00:15:16,400
Speaker 1: where I was. She would tell me in the plane

291
00:15:16,440 --> 00:15:19,920
Speaker 1: crash and now you're in South Africa, they're gonna take

292
00:15:19,960 --> 00:15:22,600
Speaker 1: care of you. You're in the hospital called mill Park,

293
00:15:22,760 --> 00:15:25,520
Speaker 1: and they're gonna just everything's gonna be okay. Don't worry.

294
00:15:25,600 --> 00:15:28,320
Speaker 1: God is with you. I'm here. So and she would

295
00:15:28,360 --> 00:15:31,040
Speaker 1: sing to me too. So I opened my eyes and

296
00:15:32,160 --> 00:15:34,200
Speaker 1: when they asked me questions like to figure out, like,

297
00:15:34,240 --> 00:15:36,240
Speaker 1: you know, my state of mind, I would like like

298
00:15:36,400 --> 00:15:38,600
Speaker 1: shake my head yes or no based on what they

299
00:15:38,640 --> 00:15:41,440
Speaker 1: asked me. And I knew. I just remember knowing. I

300
00:15:41,560 --> 00:15:43,840
Speaker 1: wasn't surprised that I was there. I knew I was

301
00:15:43,880 --> 00:15:45,760
Speaker 1: South Africa. I knew I was in this hospital. I

302
00:15:45,880 --> 00:15:48,960
Speaker 1: knew that I was burned because of the the accident,

303
00:15:49,200 --> 00:15:51,400
Speaker 1: Like I knew these details because my mom would talk

304
00:15:51,480 --> 00:15:53,040
Speaker 1: to me while I was in the coma, And I

305
00:15:53,080 --> 00:15:56,400
Speaker 1: even woke up knowing songs that I didn't know before

306
00:15:56,480 --> 00:15:59,280
Speaker 1: the accident because she would sing to me the songs

307
00:15:59,360 --> 00:16:01,400
Speaker 1: that she learned from her mom, like while I was

308
00:16:01,480 --> 00:16:03,760
Speaker 1: in school, so there's no way I could have known them.

309
00:16:04,040 --> 00:16:06,280
Speaker 1: And she would also play like songs by my bed

310
00:16:06,360 --> 00:16:08,800
Speaker 1: whenever she left, like this is all while I was

311
00:16:08,840 --> 00:16:11,200
Speaker 1: in the comma. She would play music and these were

312
00:16:11,280 --> 00:16:13,480
Speaker 1: songs that I've never heard, and I woke up knowing

313
00:16:13,600 --> 00:16:16,840
Speaker 1: these songs. So it was like the weirdest but coolest

314
00:16:16,920 --> 00:16:19,440
Speaker 1: thing because it really literally saved me. Because a lot

315
00:16:19,480 --> 00:16:22,600
Speaker 1: of times I hear people wake up from from trump

316
00:16:22,920 --> 00:16:26,680
Speaker 1: from trauma induced commas still kind of in that mindset

317
00:16:26,760 --> 00:16:29,160
Speaker 1: of like where the like their body is kind of

318
00:16:29,720 --> 00:16:32,920
Speaker 1: like restart from the last thing that it remembers, where

319
00:16:32,920 --> 00:16:34,440
Speaker 1: they wake up in a panic, they didn't know what

320
00:16:34,520 --> 00:16:37,200
Speaker 1: happened their body is still reacted to the trauma. So

321
00:16:37,400 --> 00:16:39,400
Speaker 1: because of all this stuff, my mom talking to me,

322
00:16:39,640 --> 00:16:41,880
Speaker 1: none of that happened to me, and and I was

323
00:16:41,960 --> 00:16:43,960
Speaker 1: able to kind of wake up in a very calm

324
00:16:44,160 --> 00:16:49,080
Speaker 1: and like you know, aware state. That's amazing time. Um,

325
00:16:49,160 --> 00:16:52,440
Speaker 1: you were burned six of your body? How many surgeries

326
00:16:52,480 --> 00:16:56,360
Speaker 1: as you have? I have had so in South Africa

327
00:16:56,400 --> 00:16:58,640
Speaker 1: there were different phases basically South Africa. I was there

328
00:16:58,680 --> 00:17:00,840
Speaker 1: for seven months, four months in I See You, and

329
00:17:01,400 --> 00:17:03,640
Speaker 1: three in the ward. Before I left South Africa, it

330
00:17:03,720 --> 00:17:07,320
Speaker 1: had about seventy five surgeries or so. Um. When I

331
00:17:07,400 --> 00:17:09,840
Speaker 1: first got there, I was having surgery every day, then

332
00:17:09,920 --> 00:17:14,800
Speaker 1: eventually it was twice. That's a lot. Oh yeah, yeah.

333
00:17:14,920 --> 00:17:16,960
Speaker 1: They had a lot of work to do for sure.

334
00:17:17,080 --> 00:17:20,840
Speaker 1: I mean basically six their degree burns meant I burned

335
00:17:20,880 --> 00:17:25,280
Speaker 1: everywhere except for my tummy and my back that didn't

336
00:17:25,280 --> 00:17:27,760
Speaker 1: get burned. So they used skinned from that area that

337
00:17:27,840 --> 00:17:30,080
Speaker 1: didn't burn so like cover up the areas that did

338
00:17:30,440 --> 00:17:34,280
Speaker 1: so the major surgeries, but like the major um covering

339
00:17:34,440 --> 00:17:36,000
Speaker 1: that you see on me, Like if you see any

340
00:17:36,040 --> 00:17:39,320
Speaker 1: of my pictures, my arms, my legs, and my head,

341
00:17:39,600 --> 00:17:42,840
Speaker 1: my face, all that skin they're burned off and was

342
00:17:43,080 --> 00:17:45,880
Speaker 1: all the skin that covers it now was used from

343
00:17:46,080 --> 00:17:48,119
Speaker 1: my tummy and my back. So those are like the

344
00:17:48,400 --> 00:17:51,840
Speaker 1: life changing, life saving surgery that I did while in

345
00:17:51,920 --> 00:17:54,480
Speaker 1: South Africa. Like they covered me up to make sure

346
00:17:54,520 --> 00:17:56,560
Speaker 1: that I, you know, stayed alive and stayed you know,

347
00:17:56,760 --> 00:17:58,959
Speaker 1: no infection and stuff like that. So that was all

348
00:17:59,000 --> 00:18:02,200
Speaker 1: done in South Africa. Took about seventy five surgeries. But

349
00:18:02,280 --> 00:18:05,760
Speaker 1: they didn't care about like my it wasn't about practical stuff.

350
00:18:05,840 --> 00:18:09,360
Speaker 1: That was all about this life saving stuff. The practical

351
00:18:09,480 --> 00:18:12,480
Speaker 1: reconstructive surgery came when I moved to America in styles

352
00:18:12,560 --> 00:18:16,520
Speaker 1: and seven and with Strander's Hospital here in America in Texas,

353
00:18:16,680 --> 00:18:19,760
Speaker 1: this is where they gave me back my independence, focused

354
00:18:19,800 --> 00:18:21,600
Speaker 1: on giving me surgeries that would give me back my

355
00:18:21,720 --> 00:18:25,480
Speaker 1: life and helped me to basically function again, you know,

356
00:18:25,640 --> 00:18:28,080
Speaker 1: do things for myself again. That pushed me over to

357
00:18:28,160 --> 00:18:31,959
Speaker 1: about hundred twenty five surgeries or so I think in total,

358
00:18:32,160 --> 00:18:35,280
Speaker 1: I've probably had close to one fifty because after Shriners,

359
00:18:35,280 --> 00:18:37,600
Speaker 1: I was in another hospital and then I did more

360
00:18:37,680 --> 00:18:40,480
Speaker 1: surgeries like a few years ago as well. And yeah,

361
00:18:40,640 --> 00:18:43,080
Speaker 1: so something about that. Sometimes you have to contain, do

362
00:18:43,160 --> 00:18:44,880
Speaker 1: you have to do any more surgeries? Or you're done

363
00:18:45,480 --> 00:18:47,920
Speaker 1: at this point, there's no have to anymore. Every Like

364
00:18:48,040 --> 00:18:50,640
Speaker 1: anything I do from this point on is purely elective

365
00:18:51,119 --> 00:18:54,240
Speaker 1: and would be things that if I decided to do anything,

366
00:18:54,320 --> 00:18:57,639
Speaker 1: it would be if the chances of my quality of

367
00:18:57,800 --> 00:19:01,800
Speaker 1: life are if they stand to imp roof with the surgery, um,

368
00:19:01,960 --> 00:19:04,399
Speaker 1: then I will do it. But as we like, as

369
00:19:04,440 --> 00:19:06,640
Speaker 1: we're speaking right now, I have nothing that I really

370
00:19:06,880 --> 00:19:09,440
Speaker 1: I don't have anything I want to do anymore, um

371
00:19:09,880 --> 00:19:13,240
Speaker 1: or anything I think that's worth going through the just

372
00:19:13,400 --> 00:19:16,600
Speaker 1: the recuperation process. There's nothing that they can do that

373
00:19:17,000 --> 00:19:19,400
Speaker 1: right now that would make me decide to go under

374
00:19:19,480 --> 00:19:22,080
Speaker 1: again unless it's going to change my quality of life,

375
00:19:22,119 --> 00:19:24,800
Speaker 1: like significantly. What do you mean by quality of life?

376
00:19:25,560 --> 00:19:27,760
Speaker 1: Anything that would basically help me function better, So like

377
00:19:28,040 --> 00:19:30,919
Speaker 1: it's gonna be something that maybe mix my fingers straighter,

378
00:19:31,080 --> 00:19:33,960
Speaker 1: lets me maybe hold something tighter, because there's something that

379
00:19:34,080 --> 00:19:35,760
Speaker 1: just can never do anymore because of the way my

380
00:19:35,960 --> 00:19:39,760
Speaker 1: my body healed. So there's that or anything that would

381
00:19:39,840 --> 00:19:43,000
Speaker 1: let me, you know, stretch out my arms more, anything

382
00:19:43,040 --> 00:19:45,440
Speaker 1: that will let me like lift my head more comfortably

383
00:19:45,520 --> 00:19:48,800
Speaker 1: without like the pull that comes from like looking up

384
00:19:48,880 --> 00:19:50,840
Speaker 1: or looking to the side, Like I still have those

385
00:19:50,880 --> 00:19:54,399
Speaker 1: functional issues, but again, like I still I can like

386
00:19:54,520 --> 00:19:56,560
Speaker 1: if I just lean my body back, I can look up.

387
00:19:56,960 --> 00:20:00,159
Speaker 1: But then like obviously, if I was give in the

388
00:20:00,280 --> 00:20:02,040
Speaker 1: chance to not have to do that, I just lift

389
00:20:02,080 --> 00:20:03,920
Speaker 1: my head normally, if you can tell me that you

390
00:20:03,920 --> 00:20:05,720
Speaker 1: can give me a surgery, that would do that. Cool.

391
00:20:06,119 --> 00:20:08,680
Speaker 1: But as of now, there's really like they've done the

392
00:20:08,800 --> 00:20:11,280
Speaker 1: best that I already. I think like I'm the product

393
00:20:11,359 --> 00:20:15,439
Speaker 1: of like the best possible situated, like best possible results

394
00:20:15,480 --> 00:20:18,440
Speaker 1: out of my situation. Basically, So as of now, these

395
00:20:18,480 --> 00:20:21,160
Speaker 1: things have been done to the best of the doctor's abilities.

396
00:20:21,240 --> 00:20:23,159
Speaker 1: So there's nothing really that they can do unless so

397
00:20:23,240 --> 00:20:25,240
Speaker 1: so n that's something new, like the new technology comes

398
00:20:25,320 --> 00:20:27,080
Speaker 1: up and they're like, yeah, we can totally do this,

399
00:20:27,200 --> 00:20:29,440
Speaker 1: we can make this happen without this, and that then cool.

400
00:20:29,800 --> 00:20:32,200
Speaker 1: But yeah, I mean for now, I've basically adapted to

401
00:20:32,359 --> 00:20:35,000
Speaker 1: the body that I have. So, yeah, did you have

402
00:20:35,119 --> 00:20:37,399
Speaker 1: to rebuild yourself? Love? And if so, how did you

403
00:20:37,480 --> 00:20:42,880
Speaker 1: do it? Mm hmm. That's something that rather than rebuild,

404
00:20:42,920 --> 00:20:48,600
Speaker 1: I would say I rediscovered more like rediscovered. I rediscovered

405
00:20:48,880 --> 00:20:51,680
Speaker 1: because it was really something that I had to have

406
00:20:52,040 --> 00:20:56,240
Speaker 1: before I put myself back out there. Into the world.

407
00:20:56,320 --> 00:20:58,119
Speaker 1: You know, I had to figure that because, you know,

408
00:20:58,240 --> 00:21:00,960
Speaker 1: looking so different and being so aware of it. You know,

409
00:21:01,119 --> 00:21:03,600
Speaker 1: I knew that, you know, I would be going out

410
00:21:03,640 --> 00:21:07,040
Speaker 1: into the world that is extremely judgmental, you know, and

411
00:21:07,160 --> 00:21:11,080
Speaker 1: it's the word that has set standards for beauty and

412
00:21:11,200 --> 00:21:13,800
Speaker 1: for many other things. And these standards they change all

413
00:21:13,840 --> 00:21:16,320
Speaker 1: the time. So the question became, you know, now that

414
00:21:16,440 --> 00:21:18,640
Speaker 1: I look so different from what the world may conceive

415
00:21:18,800 --> 00:21:22,119
Speaker 1: as beautiful or any kind of you know, even if

416
00:21:22,160 --> 00:21:24,760
Speaker 1: it's just any like beautiful, ugly, any of those standards,

417
00:21:25,160 --> 00:21:27,080
Speaker 1: I had to decide for myself what all those things

418
00:21:27,119 --> 00:21:29,840
Speaker 1: you meant for me before going out there and being

419
00:21:29,920 --> 00:21:32,840
Speaker 1: influenced by what the world decides those things are. You know.

420
00:21:33,000 --> 00:21:35,080
Speaker 1: So if I let myself go out there without defining

421
00:21:35,119 --> 00:21:38,119
Speaker 1: them for myself, then I will be at the mercy

422
00:21:38,200 --> 00:21:41,560
Speaker 1: of whatever the world decides beauty is. So that means

423
00:21:41,600 --> 00:21:44,600
Speaker 1: anything they say would affect me. If they say I'm ugly,

424
00:21:44,640 --> 00:21:46,639
Speaker 1: I'll believe it. If they say I'm beautiful, I'll believe it.

425
00:21:46,760 --> 00:21:49,399
Speaker 1: And you know, it's just it's such an unreliable source

426
00:21:49,520 --> 00:21:56,000
Speaker 1: of of information, especially for identity, you know, So I, oh, no, period,

427
00:21:56,200 --> 00:21:58,680
Speaker 1: like that's That's pretty much the long and short of it. Yeah,

428
00:21:59,080 --> 00:22:02,240
Speaker 1: So you know, I had to decide, you know, what

429
00:22:02,359 --> 00:22:04,240
Speaker 1: do I want beauty to me? For me? What do

430
00:22:04,320 --> 00:22:06,320
Speaker 1: I want to define myself by? How do I want

431
00:22:06,320 --> 00:22:08,680
Speaker 1: to define myself? You know? And you know what do

432
00:22:08,800 --> 00:22:11,440
Speaker 1: I want to be the basis for my definition? You know?

433
00:22:11,760 --> 00:22:14,160
Speaker 1: So being a Christian, I think played a very big

434
00:22:14,280 --> 00:22:16,800
Speaker 1: role for me in this because it allowed me to

435
00:22:16,880 --> 00:22:18,960
Speaker 1: kind of see myself the way God sees me, which

436
00:22:19,480 --> 00:22:22,280
Speaker 1: is basically nothing to do with the outset and everything

437
00:22:22,400 --> 00:22:25,399
Speaker 1: duly inside. So I had to decide if basically what

438
00:22:25,680 --> 00:22:27,440
Speaker 1: I know, I'm going to live with these scars, but

439
00:22:27,560 --> 00:22:30,120
Speaker 1: what role do I want them to play in defining

440
00:22:30,160 --> 00:22:34,359
Speaker 1: who I am, like for for like my identity's sake,

441
00:22:34,600 --> 00:22:37,399
Speaker 1: you know. And so if I realized like with the

442
00:22:37,520 --> 00:22:39,840
Speaker 1: help obviously not this is not something I came into

443
00:22:39,960 --> 00:22:42,680
Speaker 1: like all by myself. It's some kind of epiphany. It

444
00:22:42,800 --> 00:22:45,520
Speaker 1: was something that was fed into me through like a

445
00:22:45,600 --> 00:22:47,960
Speaker 1: lot of like love and support from like loved ones

446
00:22:48,080 --> 00:22:50,960
Speaker 1: and my family and people that just basically didn't treat

447
00:22:51,000 --> 00:22:53,800
Speaker 1: me different because I look different. You know. They helped

448
00:22:53,840 --> 00:22:57,639
Speaker 1: to reinforce the belief I have now that I developed

449
00:22:57,680 --> 00:23:01,359
Speaker 1: all those years ago that my scars do not define me.

450
00:23:01,640 --> 00:23:03,920
Speaker 1: You know, just because I look different doesn't mean I

451
00:23:03,960 --> 00:23:06,240
Speaker 1: have to change how I behaved, the jokes that I

452
00:23:06,359 --> 00:23:09,400
Speaker 1: laughed at, the way I crack jokes, the clothes I wear,

453
00:23:09,520 --> 00:23:12,120
Speaker 1: the places I go, these things didn't have to change

454
00:23:12,440 --> 00:23:14,480
Speaker 1: just because I look different, now, you know. To know,

455
00:23:15,119 --> 00:23:18,359
Speaker 1: So once I realized this and I looked at myself

456
00:23:18,440 --> 00:23:20,400
Speaker 1: for the first time after the act, I remember that day.

457
00:23:20,720 --> 00:23:23,080
Speaker 1: I remember the day I did, and I remember like

458
00:23:23,240 --> 00:23:24,960
Speaker 1: I wanted to just see how I look because I

459
00:23:25,040 --> 00:23:26,920
Speaker 1: knew I could tell I was bandage head to foot,

460
00:23:26,960 --> 00:23:29,199
Speaker 1: and I was like, yeah, okay, so I'm pretty sure

461
00:23:29,240 --> 00:23:31,119
Speaker 1: my face is like very different, and I wanted to

462
00:23:31,240 --> 00:23:33,480
Speaker 1: see how different it was, you know. So my mom

463
00:23:33,640 --> 00:23:36,120
Speaker 1: she brought the mirror the next day and I looked

464
00:23:36,160 --> 00:23:39,159
Speaker 1: at my reflection, and I remember seeing like the like

465
00:23:39,280 --> 00:23:42,359
Speaker 1: the scars and like the no skin, and just I

466
00:23:42,480 --> 00:23:45,480
Speaker 1: look like completely different from what I looked like before

467
00:23:45,520 --> 00:23:48,840
Speaker 1: the act, but like somehow, like it just didn't seem

468
00:23:49,280 --> 00:23:51,639
Speaker 1: like a different person. Somehow there was still something very

469
00:23:51,680 --> 00:23:54,960
Speaker 1: familiar in a reflection that looked nothing like me. And

470
00:23:55,080 --> 00:23:57,280
Speaker 1: that was what really like started me on this journey

471
00:23:57,320 --> 00:24:01,200
Speaker 1: of understanding that like whatever like makes us the essence

472
00:24:01,240 --> 00:24:04,119
Speaker 1: of who we are, like these this whatever makes it

473
00:24:04,359 --> 00:24:07,320
Speaker 1: makes nervously goes beyond my physical But if it didn't,

474
00:24:07,359 --> 00:24:10,639
Speaker 1: then that was like the first step to understand that

475
00:24:10,720 --> 00:24:12,920
Speaker 1: my scars don't define me. And then seeing other people

476
00:24:13,000 --> 00:24:15,600
Speaker 1: not treat me different because of that reinforced that, and

477
00:24:15,680 --> 00:24:17,840
Speaker 1: so I realized, you know, like, hey, you know, I

478
00:24:18,720 --> 00:24:22,040
Speaker 1: have full control over how much I want these scars

479
00:24:22,080 --> 00:24:24,680
Speaker 1: to define who I am. You know, I can either

480
00:24:24,760 --> 00:24:27,400
Speaker 1: define myself the way God sees me, which is every

481
00:24:27,520 --> 00:24:29,639
Speaker 1: quality that He gave me that He gives each one

482
00:24:29,720 --> 00:24:32,040
Speaker 1: of us, or I can just use my outside and

483
00:24:32,160 --> 00:24:35,080
Speaker 1: define myself. And I just felt it was safer and

484
00:24:35,240 --> 00:24:37,680
Speaker 1: just smarter to define myself the way God sees me

485
00:24:37,760 --> 00:24:40,399
Speaker 1: because that way, nothing the world ever says is ever

486
00:24:40,480 --> 00:24:42,400
Speaker 1: going to influence me as long as God hasn't changed

487
00:24:42,440 --> 00:24:44,600
Speaker 1: his mind about me. And that's pretty much my approach

488
00:24:44,640 --> 00:24:46,840
Speaker 1: to life. That was it then and that's it now. Basically,

489
00:24:46,920 --> 00:24:50,760
Speaker 1: that's what's helped me just kind of understand that, you know,

490
00:24:50,960 --> 00:24:54,119
Speaker 1: I can walk with my head held high in every situation,

491
00:24:54,640 --> 00:24:57,280
Speaker 1: be my authetic self at all times because this is

492
00:24:57,320 --> 00:24:58,879
Speaker 1: the way God made me. This is the way, like

493
00:24:59,000 --> 00:25:02,960
Speaker 1: this these quality He's inside trump whatever anyone says on

494
00:25:03,000 --> 00:25:05,320
Speaker 1: the outside, and it's up to me to decide to

495
00:25:05,440 --> 00:25:08,280
Speaker 1: live my life based on those inner quass And I

496
00:25:08,840 --> 00:25:11,320
Speaker 1: I see pictures of you before and when I saw

497
00:25:11,400 --> 00:25:13,119
Speaker 1: you and I was going through your Instagram, Yeah, I

498
00:25:13,200 --> 00:25:17,040
Speaker 1: still see you, Like you still look the same. I

499
00:25:17,280 --> 00:25:21,800
Speaker 1: love that. I think now you're welcome out stiously because

500
00:25:21,800 --> 00:25:23,800
Speaker 1: I was like I did like a massive research on you,

501
00:25:23,920 --> 00:25:25,879
Speaker 1: and I was like going through a picture stuff you

502
00:25:26,400 --> 00:25:28,200
Speaker 1: seeing all this stuff and I'm like, oh my, like

503
00:25:28,320 --> 00:25:32,399
Speaker 1: I still see you. And then one thing, one more

504
00:25:32,480 --> 00:25:34,480
Speaker 1: thing I thought that you said that I really like

505
00:25:34,640 --> 00:25:37,639
Speaker 1: when you said that you would not conform to your

506
00:25:37,720 --> 00:25:40,520
Speaker 1: stars and that it was only physical because everything else

507
00:25:40,600 --> 00:25:42,400
Speaker 1: was still intact. And I'm like, that is so true,

508
00:25:42,440 --> 00:25:45,000
Speaker 1: Like you still got your right mind, you still got

509
00:25:45,080 --> 00:25:49,200
Speaker 1: your limbs and stuff exactly. You know that's a girl

510
00:25:49,480 --> 00:25:51,720
Speaker 1: right there. You know. The people who have gone through

511
00:25:51,760 --> 00:25:54,800
Speaker 1: what I've gone through, and like they lost like a

512
00:25:54,880 --> 00:25:58,320
Speaker 1: lot more than you know, just they're like their physical

513
00:25:58,520 --> 00:26:01,000
Speaker 1: like their face or their their physics appearance, they lost

514
00:26:01,080 --> 00:26:04,240
Speaker 1: like limbs, they lost Some of some people are in wheelchairs,

515
00:26:04,320 --> 00:26:07,320
Speaker 1: Like I just feel like compared to that, like, what

516
00:26:07,440 --> 00:26:09,560
Speaker 1: do I really have to complain about? I can walk

517
00:26:09,640 --> 00:26:11,800
Speaker 1: around with myself, I can talk normally. I didn't have

518
00:26:11,840 --> 00:26:21,440
Speaker 1: any on Instagram. Look, look, you know good, thank you,

519
00:26:21,920 --> 00:26:25,520
Speaker 1: thank you so much. That's the speed I look at her,

520
00:26:31,359 --> 00:26:34,200
Speaker 1: thank you, not your story. And that's why I was like,

521
00:26:34,280 --> 00:26:37,160
Speaker 1: I was so excited that you came onto the platform

522
00:26:37,160 --> 00:26:38,959
Speaker 1: because I'm like, people need to know that you can

523
00:26:39,040 --> 00:26:41,879
Speaker 1: have life after trauma. Yes, and that's what you just

524
00:26:42,080 --> 00:26:44,760
Speaker 1: you nailed it. That's it. That's exactly the phrase that

525
00:26:44,760 --> 00:26:47,600
Speaker 1: I always use. There is life after trauma. You just

526
00:26:47,680 --> 00:26:49,879
Speaker 1: have to find it and define what that life is

527
00:26:49,920 --> 00:26:51,280
Speaker 1: going to be for you. I could have been a

528
00:26:51,359 --> 00:26:54,040
Speaker 1: very different person. I could have decided to to allow

529
00:26:54,160 --> 00:26:56,760
Speaker 1: this thing to take over my personality and just be

530
00:26:56,880 --> 00:26:59,359
Speaker 1: the only thing that people seek and know about me.

531
00:26:59,520 --> 00:27:02,400
Speaker 1: But you know, I didn't want just this from my life.

532
00:27:02,440 --> 00:27:05,199
Speaker 1: You know. I wanted it's not not to live as

533
00:27:05,280 --> 00:27:07,560
Speaker 1: though it didn't happen, but to live in spite of

534
00:27:07,600 --> 00:27:09,480
Speaker 1: what happened and show other people that they can do

535
00:27:09,560 --> 00:27:12,480
Speaker 1: the same thing too. You know. So that's that's pretty

536
00:27:12,560 --> 00:27:14,760
Speaker 1: much what I hope my platforms show, and yeah, I

537
00:27:14,880 --> 00:27:17,200
Speaker 1: just I just hope to people, isn't my truth like this?

538
00:27:18,280 --> 00:27:20,440
Speaker 1: So I know that you are an advocate for spreading

539
00:27:20,560 --> 00:27:23,160
Speaker 1: awareness on bullying, So what is an advice you would

540
00:27:23,160 --> 00:27:25,280
Speaker 1: give to those on being bullied because of how they look?

541
00:27:27,880 --> 00:27:33,240
Speaker 1: I would advise them that bully is something that's really

542
00:27:33,280 --> 00:27:36,080
Speaker 1: close to my heart because, um, even though I didn't

543
00:27:36,119 --> 00:27:40,879
Speaker 1: experience it like like post burns, um personally, you know,

544
00:27:41,000 --> 00:27:44,239
Speaker 1: I was definitely very sheltered and I just was very

545
00:27:44,280 --> 00:27:46,000
Speaker 1: well taken care of it. I never had to encounter

546
00:27:46,080 --> 00:27:48,040
Speaker 1: people that would treat me that way, at least none

547
00:27:48,080 --> 00:27:49,760
Speaker 1: until I was ready to face those kind of people.

548
00:27:50,080 --> 00:27:51,359
Speaker 1: I know that's not the case for a lot of

549
00:27:51,400 --> 00:27:54,119
Speaker 1: other people. And also my sister like went through a

550
00:27:54,240 --> 00:27:57,360
Speaker 1: very like difficult time when we first moved over here

551
00:27:57,800 --> 00:28:01,080
Speaker 1: because you know, just differences, you know, different accent, different

552
00:28:01,600 --> 00:28:04,080
Speaker 1: just differences, you know, And so um, that's something that

553
00:28:04,280 --> 00:28:07,359
Speaker 1: I just really pray doesn't happen to any other person

554
00:28:07,440 --> 00:28:11,200
Speaker 1: that I know. So, UM, what I usually say is, um,

555
00:28:13,520 --> 00:28:19,399
Speaker 1: I I'm a huge advocate for for um being someone

556
00:28:19,520 --> 00:28:22,399
Speaker 1: who loves themselves. And when I say self love, I

557
00:28:22,480 --> 00:28:26,160
Speaker 1: mean loving, not like a like some kind of um,

558
00:28:26,800 --> 00:28:29,800
Speaker 1: just overarching statement about just loving all the good stuff

559
00:28:29,840 --> 00:28:32,720
Speaker 1: and and just seeing yourself as like just a good person,

560
00:28:32,840 --> 00:28:36,760
Speaker 1: like not unrealistically loving yourself, but loving everything about yourself,

561
00:28:36,800 --> 00:28:39,680
Speaker 1: including your flaws and your scars. Because what I've noticed

562
00:28:39,680 --> 00:28:44,160
Speaker 1: about bullying is that these people who bully you, they

563
00:28:44,480 --> 00:28:48,080
Speaker 1: try to make you feel bad about things that they

564
00:28:48,200 --> 00:28:50,640
Speaker 1: think you should be ashamed of. You know, they used,

565
00:28:50,760 --> 00:28:54,080
Speaker 1: they use things that make you, oftentimes what makes you unique,

566
00:28:54,120 --> 00:28:56,520
Speaker 1: what makes you stand that, what makes you different. They

567
00:28:56,640 --> 00:28:59,280
Speaker 1: try to make you feel bad for those things that

568
00:28:59,400 --> 00:29:00,920
Speaker 1: make you a different in person. But at the end

569
00:29:00,920 --> 00:29:02,920
Speaker 1: of the day, we are We're not made to be

570
00:29:03,000 --> 00:29:06,680
Speaker 1: cookie cutter and to be the same. We're made as individuals,

571
00:29:06,760 --> 00:29:10,080
Speaker 1: you know. So I believe that like those differences and

572
00:29:10,240 --> 00:29:13,240
Speaker 1: those those unique things that make us like that in

573
00:29:13,480 --> 00:29:15,760
Speaker 1: these individuals that we are, those are the things that

574
00:29:16,440 --> 00:29:19,200
Speaker 1: that those are the things that make us like that's

575
00:29:19,280 --> 00:29:21,880
Speaker 1: that's what's given to us to allow us to be special,

576
00:29:22,000 --> 00:29:25,440
Speaker 1: to allow us to thrive. And a lot of exactly

577
00:29:25,680 --> 00:29:28,160
Speaker 1: a lot of times those are those people have people

578
00:29:28,240 --> 00:29:33,080
Speaker 1: have made like success stories and like businesses and amazing

579
00:29:33,120 --> 00:29:36,000
Speaker 1: things happen through their differences. You know, you don't stand

580
00:29:36,040 --> 00:29:37,840
Speaker 1: out by being the same, you know what I mean?

581
00:29:38,000 --> 00:29:40,360
Speaker 1: So like, so I feel like when when you have,

582
00:29:40,560 --> 00:29:42,280
Speaker 1: if you have things that people are trying to make

583
00:29:42,320 --> 00:29:45,680
Speaker 1: you feel bad about, embrace those things, like love those

584
00:29:45,680 --> 00:29:48,360
Speaker 1: things about yourself because the more you love yourself and

585
00:29:48,640 --> 00:29:51,280
Speaker 1: your flaws, your acknowledge your flaws, and you love yourself

586
00:29:51,360 --> 00:29:54,640
Speaker 1: despite your flaws, you take away the power from beliefs

587
00:29:54,680 --> 00:29:56,680
Speaker 1: they don't have. They can't make you feel bad about

588
00:29:56,760 --> 00:29:58,800
Speaker 1: something that you've accepted about yourself and that you love

589
00:29:58,840 --> 00:30:02,360
Speaker 1: about yourself. And that really what I feel. Like my sister,

590
00:30:02,480 --> 00:30:04,080
Speaker 1: they try to make her feel bad about like her

591
00:30:04,160 --> 00:30:05,880
Speaker 1: accent and try to make sure you feel bad about

592
00:30:06,200 --> 00:30:09,600
Speaker 1: her skin and her you know, her nappy hair, and

593
00:30:09,920 --> 00:30:12,880
Speaker 1: she we just did her best to teach her how

594
00:30:13,000 --> 00:30:15,640
Speaker 1: to love those things that make her unique. Like her

595
00:30:15,680 --> 00:30:18,920
Speaker 1: skin is her skin, she has flawless, beautiful black skin.

596
00:30:19,280 --> 00:30:21,400
Speaker 1: Her hair is her hair and it's beautiful, and when

597
00:30:21,440 --> 00:30:23,760
Speaker 1: she wears her fro, she looks amazing. Like there are

598
00:30:23,840 --> 00:30:26,400
Speaker 1: things that like like when you see these things and

599
00:30:26,560 --> 00:30:28,320
Speaker 1: people make you feel bad, you try to hide them,

600
00:30:28,360 --> 00:30:31,600
Speaker 1: but once you expose them, you love them, you embrace them.

601
00:30:32,040 --> 00:30:37,320
Speaker 1: You just period like once once people see that you've

602
00:30:37,320 --> 00:30:39,880
Speaker 1: embrace these things, they don't have any power animo to

603
00:30:40,040 --> 00:30:42,720
Speaker 1: like use those things against you. And that's if you

604
00:30:42,760 --> 00:30:45,000
Speaker 1: see her now, she's just like out there doing her thing,

605
00:30:45,400 --> 00:30:48,120
Speaker 1: like popping with the melanine and just looking beautiful and

606
00:30:48,720 --> 00:30:50,480
Speaker 1: and it's not fake. You can see that this is

607
00:30:50,560 --> 00:30:52,400
Speaker 1: really how she feels about herself, you know, this is

608
00:30:52,480 --> 00:30:54,720
Speaker 1: what she loves about herself. And I think once you

609
00:30:54,840 --> 00:30:58,120
Speaker 1: take that power from them, then you can, like you

610
00:30:58,240 --> 00:31:00,200
Speaker 1: can rule the world, like you can do what ever

611
00:31:00,280 --> 00:31:02,880
Speaker 1: you want, and you just feel free, you know. So

612
00:31:03,040 --> 00:31:06,320
Speaker 1: I that's really the approach that I I take and

613
00:31:06,400 --> 00:31:08,560
Speaker 1: that I taught my sister to take, and I want

614
00:31:08,600 --> 00:31:11,680
Speaker 1: people to take as well. Embrace those unique things that

615
00:31:11,800 --> 00:31:14,680
Speaker 1: make you different and take the power away from those

616
00:31:14,680 --> 00:31:16,400
Speaker 1: people who are trying to use those things to make

617
00:31:16,440 --> 00:31:19,120
Speaker 1: you feel bad about yourself. That's that's really what I

618
00:31:19,200 --> 00:31:21,840
Speaker 1: want to tell them. I think that it's not something

619
00:31:21,920 --> 00:31:24,120
Speaker 1: that happens overnight. You know, it's not like a quick

620
00:31:24,560 --> 00:31:26,600
Speaker 1: um what's it called. It's not a quick like a

621
00:31:26,800 --> 00:31:30,440
Speaker 1: solution to this issue of bullying, because you know, self

622
00:31:30,520 --> 00:31:33,560
Speaker 1: love takes time. I'm still growing every day with loving myself,

623
00:31:33,800 --> 00:31:36,200
Speaker 1: you know, it doesn't. It doesn't happen overnight, but it's

624
00:31:36,360 --> 00:31:40,680
Speaker 1: I think that's the most long term solution to this thing,

625
00:31:40,760 --> 00:31:43,400
Speaker 1: because you know, when when when people bully you, there's

626
00:31:43,440 --> 00:31:45,840
Speaker 1: also like you start to bully yourself to you know,

627
00:31:45,880 --> 00:31:48,200
Speaker 1: because what happens is you start to believe those things

628
00:31:48,240 --> 00:31:50,400
Speaker 1: they say about you, you know, and then it makes

629
00:31:50,440 --> 00:31:54,880
Speaker 1: you it makes you a problem with it exactly, you know.

630
00:31:55,680 --> 00:31:57,600
Speaker 1: So I just, yeah, I want people to approach it

631
00:31:57,680 --> 00:31:59,880
Speaker 1: in that way of learning to just love themselves and

632
00:32:00,160 --> 00:32:02,640
Speaker 1: take that power from the bully, like once and for all,

633
00:32:02,760 --> 00:32:06,080
Speaker 1: like permanently. And yeah, that's pretty much what I say.

634
00:32:06,160 --> 00:32:09,200
Speaker 1: I guess I hope it helps. I'm just scarious if

635
00:32:09,240 --> 00:32:12,800
Speaker 1: they ever figure out what caused the accident. So I

636
00:32:12,880 --> 00:32:13,920
Speaker 1: got a lot of there. There were a lot of

637
00:32:13,960 --> 00:32:17,120
Speaker 1: different reports really. One was about how it was. They

638
00:32:17,160 --> 00:32:19,760
Speaker 1: said it was Pallette error. Another one said the plane

639
00:32:19,840 --> 00:32:23,360
Speaker 1: was bad. The plane had like a um it was

640
00:32:23,400 --> 00:32:25,760
Speaker 1: like an old plane, you had some faulty parts, things

641
00:32:25,840 --> 00:32:27,600
Speaker 1: like that. But I think at the end of the

642
00:32:27,680 --> 00:32:30,360
Speaker 1: day they realized it was about like the Pallette trying

643
00:32:30,440 --> 00:32:33,600
Speaker 1: to land um in very bad weather. It was apparently

644
00:32:33,600 --> 00:32:37,240
Speaker 1: there was a thunderstorm, didn't know that until like after Yeah,

645
00:32:37,400 --> 00:32:39,840
Speaker 1: so there was very low visibility and there was a

646
00:32:39,880 --> 00:32:43,240
Speaker 1: thunderstorm and he tried to land in the thunderstorm and miscalculated,

647
00:32:43,320 --> 00:32:48,240
Speaker 1: and that's what happened. That's what they said. I know

648
00:32:48,360 --> 00:32:51,320
Speaker 1: that you are a faith based woman. Did you have

649
00:32:52,240 --> 00:32:56,520
Speaker 1: and we listen, we love a faith based moment, did

650
00:32:56,560 --> 00:33:01,480
Speaker 1: you have a question your faith doing your journey? More

651
00:33:01,560 --> 00:33:05,560
Speaker 1: than not really questioned, It was more, um, I guess

652
00:33:05,880 --> 00:33:08,000
Speaker 1: my faith free. What what happened with my faith was

653
00:33:08,080 --> 00:33:12,120
Speaker 1: that it kind of it grew actually during this time.

654
00:33:12,480 --> 00:33:15,360
Speaker 1: And I say that because prior to the accident, I

655
00:33:15,560 --> 00:33:17,640
Speaker 1: was a Christian and I was like, you know, born

656
00:33:17,680 --> 00:33:20,240
Speaker 1: into a Christian, how to believe in the household? And

657
00:33:20,960 --> 00:33:22,760
Speaker 1: that was that was like my life. You know, I

658
00:33:23,000 --> 00:33:25,160
Speaker 1: would I would have called myself a Christian based on

659
00:33:25,200 --> 00:33:27,800
Speaker 1: the fact that I was baptized and I you know,

660
00:33:27,960 --> 00:33:31,400
Speaker 1: my family believe this, therefore I believe this. So the

661
00:33:31,480 --> 00:33:34,520
Speaker 1: point is I wasn't I didn't have what you would

662
00:33:34,560 --> 00:33:37,360
Speaker 1: call a personal relationship with God, but one that was

663
00:33:37,480 --> 00:33:40,440
Speaker 1: derived based on my family's beliefs. So that was where

664
00:33:40,480 --> 00:33:43,080
Speaker 1: I was before the accident happened. I wasn't, like I

665
00:33:43,200 --> 00:33:45,080
Speaker 1: believed in God and I believe he existed, but I

666
00:33:45,200 --> 00:33:48,240
Speaker 1: had never tried to have something personal with him prior

667
00:33:48,280 --> 00:33:51,520
Speaker 1: to the accident. That only happened after, and even then

668
00:33:52,160 --> 00:33:56,320
Speaker 1: after like nothing else worked. Basically, you know, I was

669
00:33:56,680 --> 00:33:59,720
Speaker 1: in I didn't have any any I didn't blame God

670
00:33:59,800 --> 00:34:02,400
Speaker 1: for anything, but I also didn't ask him for anything,

671
00:34:02,720 --> 00:34:05,080
Speaker 1: you know, and I didn't feel like I needed to

672
00:34:05,640 --> 00:34:09,080
Speaker 1: do that because I had my mom who was such

673
00:34:09,120 --> 00:34:12,799
Speaker 1: a strong look and I believe like as long as

674
00:34:12,840 --> 00:34:14,520
Speaker 1: God was listened to her, then I didn't need to

675
00:34:14,560 --> 00:34:17,279
Speaker 1: say nothing. Like I just felt like, yeah, she she

676
00:34:17,480 --> 00:34:20,040
Speaker 1: did all the prain and she did all the interceding

677
00:34:20,160 --> 00:34:21,600
Speaker 1: for me, and I didn't feel like I needed to

678
00:34:21,640 --> 00:34:24,040
Speaker 1: do anything personally because she had she had that covered.

679
00:34:24,280 --> 00:34:26,360
Speaker 1: So that was my attitude for even like three or

680
00:34:26,400 --> 00:34:28,600
Speaker 1: four months after the accident, I was really not even

681
00:34:28,640 --> 00:34:31,680
Speaker 1: trying to have anything personal, not because I didn't want

682
00:34:31,760 --> 00:34:34,200
Speaker 1: I didn't feel like he wouldn't help or I didn't

683
00:34:34,200 --> 00:34:36,920
Speaker 1: feel like I obviously I believed in him enough to

684
00:34:36,960 --> 00:34:38,840
Speaker 1: believe that he would help me through my mom. I

685
00:34:38,920 --> 00:34:40,880
Speaker 1: just didn't feel like I needed to do anything personally.

686
00:34:41,120 --> 00:34:44,680
Speaker 1: But I got to a point where, you know, medication

687
00:34:44,760 --> 00:34:47,120
Speaker 1: stopped working, and there were just some things that that

688
00:34:47,400 --> 00:34:51,040
Speaker 1: drugs could not heal that had to be healed by

689
00:34:51,200 --> 00:34:54,440
Speaker 1: something other than that, something bigger than that. And I

690
00:34:54,800 --> 00:34:57,360
Speaker 1: got to a point where I realized this for myself,

691
00:34:57,960 --> 00:35:01,160
Speaker 1: and um, that was the point where I decided to

692
00:35:01,320 --> 00:35:04,239
Speaker 1: kind of start to grow something personal for myself, not

693
00:35:04,400 --> 00:35:06,960
Speaker 1: just because you know, this is something my family is,

694
00:35:07,000 --> 00:35:08,640
Speaker 1: but actually because I want to know about this God

695
00:35:08,680 --> 00:35:11,560
Speaker 1: that everyone so you want to do it for yourself exactly. Yeah.

696
00:35:11,680 --> 00:35:14,120
Speaker 1: So that happened like five maybe four or five months

697
00:35:14,120 --> 00:35:17,080
Speaker 1: into my treatment, and it's something that I'm like that

698
00:35:17,320 --> 00:35:20,600
Speaker 1: growth have been happening and is still happening as we speak,

699
00:35:20,760 --> 00:35:23,399
Speaker 1: Like it's you know, I mean, we never ever get

700
00:35:23,440 --> 00:35:25,080
Speaker 1: to a point where we're like, all right, we're good now,

701
00:35:25,200 --> 00:35:28,120
Speaker 1: we know everything to do with this. We're like we're

702
00:35:28,160 --> 00:35:30,640
Speaker 1: like Christiana, now we get it. We get it. You know.

703
00:35:30,719 --> 00:35:32,880
Speaker 1: It's a it's a it's a journey, like a life journey,

704
00:35:33,320 --> 00:35:36,080
Speaker 1: and it's one that definitely started for me after the accident.

705
00:35:36,280 --> 00:35:38,960
Speaker 1: So and I'm grateful that it did, for sure, because

706
00:35:39,840 --> 00:35:42,719
Speaker 1: there's no me without God. And honestly, like the way

707
00:35:42,760 --> 00:35:45,160
Speaker 1: that I think the things that I do, the confidence

708
00:35:45,200 --> 00:35:49,440
Speaker 1: that I carry myself with the genuine like, the authentic

709
00:35:49,600 --> 00:35:51,840
Speaker 1: way I care. I try to care myself in my

710
00:35:51,960 --> 00:35:56,480
Speaker 1: daily life. All that I attribute to just God and

711
00:35:56,760 --> 00:35:58,719
Speaker 1: and the grice that He's given to me and to

712
00:35:58,840 --> 00:36:02,400
Speaker 1: my family. So yeah, m hmm. Do you still suffer

713
00:36:02,480 --> 00:36:08,880
Speaker 1: from survivor is guilt? Mm hmm. Honestly, that's something that

714
00:36:09,000 --> 00:36:13,520
Speaker 1: I never actually felt to begin with. And I say

715
00:36:13,600 --> 00:36:18,520
Speaker 1: this because I never once allowed myself to question why

716
00:36:18,640 --> 00:36:23,160
Speaker 1: something like this happened, you know, or why why? Why

717
00:36:23,239 --> 00:36:25,640
Speaker 1: did only me survive out of all these other kids?

718
00:36:25,719 --> 00:36:28,279
Speaker 1: I never I never went down that path. And the

719
00:36:28,360 --> 00:36:32,360
Speaker 1: reason is, you know, what what good would that? Do?

720
00:36:32,800 --> 00:36:35,040
Speaker 1: You know? I felt like just there's some things that

721
00:36:35,640 --> 00:36:38,000
Speaker 1: happened in this life that no matter what happens, you

722
00:36:38,120 --> 00:36:40,040
Speaker 1: just never know the reason why. Only God is the

723
00:36:40,080 --> 00:36:41,960
Speaker 1: reason why. And I felt like this was one of them,

724
00:36:42,000 --> 00:36:44,239
Speaker 1: because there's no even if someone gave me a reason

725
00:36:44,360 --> 00:36:48,000
Speaker 1: why this accident, why only of these sixty one kids survived? Like,

726
00:36:48,360 --> 00:36:51,640
Speaker 1: is it ever gonna make me feel satisfied or make

727
00:36:51,760 --> 00:36:56,200
Speaker 1: these parents feel satisfied? No reason can ever be satisfactory,

728
00:36:56,560 --> 00:36:58,880
Speaker 1: you know too? Okay, Yeah, now I get it. I

729
00:36:58,920 --> 00:37:00,799
Speaker 1: get why all these people have to die. It's never

730
00:37:00,880 --> 00:37:04,080
Speaker 1: gonna make sense, you know, So why even bother going

731
00:37:04,160 --> 00:37:08,480
Speaker 1: down this like downward spiral asking why when you know

732
00:37:08,800 --> 00:37:11,000
Speaker 1: that the answer is never going to be satisfied, Like

733
00:37:11,280 --> 00:37:13,160
Speaker 1: you're never gonna be happy with what you hear? You know,

734
00:37:13,200 --> 00:37:15,239
Speaker 1: who knows why these things happened? Like we live in

735
00:37:15,280 --> 00:37:18,359
Speaker 1: a flawed world. The worst things happened to the best

736
00:37:18,480 --> 00:37:22,279
Speaker 1: kind of people. So like, rather than spending my time

737
00:37:22,360 --> 00:37:26,240
Speaker 1: asking why, feeling bad for surviving? What even the parents

738
00:37:26,320 --> 00:37:28,399
Speaker 1: of these kids that passed away aren't making me feel

739
00:37:28,440 --> 00:37:31,279
Speaker 1: that way. They're not blaming me for anything or or

740
00:37:31,400 --> 00:37:34,280
Speaker 1: feeling like why didn't their kids survive? Instead, these parents

741
00:37:34,320 --> 00:37:37,680
Speaker 1: all they did was sending courage in letters and messages.

742
00:37:37,719 --> 00:37:39,959
Speaker 1: They called my mom to pray, Like these were people

743
00:37:40,040 --> 00:37:42,640
Speaker 1: that were they had latched onto my life as like

744
00:37:42,960 --> 00:37:45,120
Speaker 1: one good thing that came out of this horrible thing.

745
00:37:45,400 --> 00:37:48,040
Speaker 1: So if for nothing else for these parents who lost

746
00:37:48,040 --> 00:37:50,279
Speaker 1: their loved ones, I had to live my life in

747
00:37:50,360 --> 00:37:53,000
Speaker 1: a way that would honor those that passed away. Rather

748
00:37:53,040 --> 00:37:55,960
Speaker 1: than spending my time feeling guilty for their for surviving,

749
00:37:56,040 --> 00:37:58,839
Speaker 1: I wanted instead to make my life count for them,

750
00:37:58,960 --> 00:38:00,920
Speaker 1: for their sake and the sake of those that they

751
00:38:01,040 --> 00:38:04,880
Speaker 1: left behind. I wanted to live as excellently as possible

752
00:38:05,280 --> 00:38:08,800
Speaker 1: and live this life in a way that would basically

753
00:38:08,880 --> 00:38:11,360
Speaker 1: make them and their loved ones proud. So that's pretty

754
00:38:11,440 --> 00:38:13,680
Speaker 1: much the spin that I put on it, and and

755
00:38:13,840 --> 00:38:16,879
Speaker 1: that was what I decided to do because I felt

756
00:38:16,880 --> 00:38:18,520
Speaker 1: like that would be the best way to honor those

757
00:38:18,560 --> 00:38:20,600
Speaker 1: that passed away, rather than feeling bad, Because then why

758
00:38:20,640 --> 00:38:21,960
Speaker 1: would I say, you know, if I'm going to spend

759
00:38:22,000 --> 00:38:25,640
Speaker 1: my time in misery and sad and guilty about what happened,

760
00:38:25,680 --> 00:38:28,719
Speaker 1: then what was the point of me being saved If

761
00:38:28,800 --> 00:38:30,200
Speaker 1: that's what I'm going to do with the life here.

762
00:38:30,360 --> 00:38:32,719
Speaker 1: So that was that was really like my outlook on

763
00:38:32,800 --> 00:38:35,520
Speaker 1: it from the start, and and it really hasn't changed,

764
00:38:35,560 --> 00:38:37,239
Speaker 1: you know, they're at the end of the day, like

765
00:38:37,320 --> 00:38:40,960
Speaker 1: that's really the base drive that I have behind everything

766
00:38:41,000 --> 00:38:43,800
Speaker 1: that I do is to just make those angels proud.

767
00:38:43,920 --> 00:38:47,120
Speaker 1: And I know that their parents are watching and they're

768
00:38:47,120 --> 00:38:50,239
Speaker 1: always supporting me. They follow me on Facebook, they like

769
00:38:50,400 --> 00:38:53,200
Speaker 1: they're amazing, and I know that they're happy every time

770
00:38:53,280 --> 00:38:56,480
Speaker 1: that they see me shine in some way, you know,

771
00:38:56,600 --> 00:39:00,239
Speaker 1: smaller big. So yeah, that's that's one thing I've head

772
00:39:00,360 --> 00:39:02,239
Speaker 1: was um and I was kind of it was kind

773
00:39:02,280 --> 00:39:04,799
Speaker 1: of touching when you said when you graduated, m y'all,

774
00:39:05,160 --> 00:39:09,000
Speaker 1: she graduate at the top of her class. You were

775
00:39:09,080 --> 00:39:13,400
Speaker 1: saying how you felt your classmates behind you and this

776
00:39:13,560 --> 00:39:16,279
Speaker 1: was an accomplishment for them as well, And I was

777
00:39:16,320 --> 00:39:20,680
Speaker 1: just like wow, like that was really touching. Thank you,

778
00:39:21,400 --> 00:39:24,279
Speaker 1: That's how I felt. Yeah, how did music help you

779
00:39:24,360 --> 00:39:29,719
Speaker 1: with your healing? Oh man, music there are there's just

780
00:39:30,520 --> 00:39:33,560
Speaker 1: there's just parts of my life, like parts of me

781
00:39:34,280 --> 00:39:39,840
Speaker 1: that like would never have been the same without like music. Honestly,

782
00:39:40,239 --> 00:39:43,439
Speaker 1: it's something that basically, I mean, everyone grows up loving

783
00:39:43,560 --> 00:39:46,040
Speaker 1: music obviously, so that's that's like a given, but like

784
00:39:46,200 --> 00:39:54,520
Speaker 1: it was something excuse big time, big true honestly, like

785
00:39:54,640 --> 00:39:57,000
Speaker 1: growing up in Nigeria. I mean, this is something that like,

786
00:39:57,200 --> 00:40:00,480
Speaker 1: oh man, it was just and then being so as

787
00:40:00,520 --> 00:40:02,440
Speaker 1: I like became like as I grew older, like as

788
00:40:02,480 --> 00:40:05,640
Speaker 1: a teenager, I noticed that my voice was getting like different,

789
00:40:05,719 --> 00:40:07,640
Speaker 1: like you know, it was getting better, and so I

790
00:40:07,800 --> 00:40:09,840
Speaker 1: loved singing like from the get go. You know, it

791
00:40:10,000 --> 00:40:12,399
Speaker 1: was something that I already loved doing. But then after

792
00:40:12,480 --> 00:40:15,719
Speaker 1: the accident happened, like music was something that was there

793
00:40:15,760 --> 00:40:17,640
Speaker 1: even before I opened my eyes, Like when I told

794
00:40:17,640 --> 00:40:19,279
Speaker 1: you about how my mom was singing to me, and

795
00:40:19,320 --> 00:40:21,160
Speaker 1: how I would hear music while I was in the coma,

796
00:40:21,239 --> 00:40:23,960
Speaker 1: Like these were things that like kept me kind of

797
00:40:24,080 --> 00:40:27,279
Speaker 1: grounded on this side, you know, kept me tethered to

798
00:40:27,560 --> 00:40:30,680
Speaker 1: like this world, you know, hearing these sounds here my

799
00:40:30,760 --> 00:40:33,360
Speaker 1: mom's voice, hearing her singing songs to me, Hearing like

800
00:40:33,520 --> 00:40:37,040
Speaker 1: Destiny's Child, you know, Backstreet Boys playing like over like

801
00:40:37,160 --> 00:40:40,160
Speaker 1: the the speaker like in my hospital room. Like these

802
00:40:40,200 --> 00:40:44,440
Speaker 1: were things that like really really kept me, like like

803
00:40:44,920 --> 00:40:48,240
Speaker 1: even even in my subconscious like they made me understand

804
00:40:48,280 --> 00:40:50,800
Speaker 1: that I was still here, I was still present, and

805
00:40:50,880 --> 00:40:53,600
Speaker 1: so opening my eyes, you know, knowing these songs like

806
00:40:53,800 --> 00:40:56,120
Speaker 1: it made music even that much more special to me.

807
00:40:56,600 --> 00:40:59,439
Speaker 1: And then also eventually when I was able to talk

808
00:41:00,040 --> 00:41:03,280
Speaker 1: and sing along to like my favorite songs. I remember

809
00:41:04,520 --> 00:41:06,920
Speaker 1: the first time I sang along to a song. It

810
00:41:07,000 --> 00:41:09,360
Speaker 1: was a Kelly Clarkson song and it was playing and

811
00:41:09,560 --> 00:41:11,160
Speaker 1: my mom just kind of with her head around and

812
00:41:11,239 --> 00:41:13,520
Speaker 1: it was like, um, what was that? Like That's not

813
00:41:13,640 --> 00:41:16,520
Speaker 1: how you used to sound. And so something obviously happened

814
00:41:16,560 --> 00:41:21,120
Speaker 1: also like post accident that changed my voice like different,

815
00:41:21,200 --> 00:41:25,080
Speaker 1: like significantly for sure, So like this was something that

816
00:41:25,239 --> 00:41:27,600
Speaker 1: made me even that much more special to me because

817
00:41:27,680 --> 00:41:30,080
Speaker 1: not like I felt like my voice had gone through

818
00:41:30,160 --> 00:41:33,600
Speaker 1: this like weird change that had been triggered by the accident. Somehow,

819
00:41:34,000 --> 00:41:36,279
Speaker 1: I didn't really question it. I didn't really ask too

820
00:41:36,320 --> 00:41:38,960
Speaker 1: many questions or like trying to understand the science of

821
00:41:39,040 --> 00:41:41,080
Speaker 1: it or anything. I just I just ran with it,

822
00:41:41,120 --> 00:41:42,600
Speaker 1: and I was just happy that I could do this.

823
00:41:42,760 --> 00:41:45,200
Speaker 1: So so it became like a really big part of

824
00:41:45,239 --> 00:41:48,279
Speaker 1: my healing as well. I mean, I music was an

825
00:41:48,440 --> 00:41:50,359
Speaker 1: escape man Like it was like it was the one

826
00:41:50,400 --> 00:41:52,960
Speaker 1: thing I could do no matter what I was in

827
00:41:53,160 --> 00:41:55,560
Speaker 1: like situation, like what like if I was lying down

828
00:41:55,680 --> 00:41:58,359
Speaker 1: in pain, if I couldn't move, I couldn't move any

829
00:41:58,400 --> 00:42:00,040
Speaker 1: part of my body, I could move my mouth. I

830
00:42:00,080 --> 00:42:02,279
Speaker 1: could sing like my throat, I could sing. And that

831
00:42:02,440 --> 00:42:04,799
Speaker 1: was something that I always had. So I remember after

832
00:42:04,920 --> 00:42:06,680
Speaker 1: I moved down here to America, my dad brought me

833
00:42:06,719 --> 00:42:09,800
Speaker 1: a carrier Commichine, which I still have and I'm always

834
00:42:09,920 --> 00:42:14,000
Speaker 1: like still singing on like constantly. But then also Trennon's

835
00:42:14,080 --> 00:42:16,759
Speaker 1: hospital made music therapy a part of my heating as well,

836
00:42:16,880 --> 00:42:19,080
Speaker 1: like part of my treatment, So I had that as

837
00:42:19,120 --> 00:42:21,680
Speaker 1: well as a way to express myself and just something

838
00:42:21,760 --> 00:42:24,279
Speaker 1: different to do that wasn't surgery. You know, this was

839
00:42:24,360 --> 00:42:27,040
Speaker 1: before I started school. Yeah, so you know, music has

840
00:42:27,080 --> 00:42:29,800
Speaker 1: just always been there, and you know, I would just

841
00:42:29,920 --> 00:42:32,160
Speaker 1: sing for fun and just it was a hobby, was

842
00:42:32,239 --> 00:42:35,719
Speaker 1: my favorite, is my favorite pastime. Eventually, in I think

843
00:42:36,960 --> 00:42:39,439
Speaker 1: I finally got the you know, the balls to join

844
00:42:39,560 --> 00:42:42,800
Speaker 1: my churs choir like a worship team. So that was

845
00:42:42,880 --> 00:42:44,680
Speaker 1: like another fun thing to do. But that was really

846
00:42:44,719 --> 00:42:46,319
Speaker 1: as far as I was never going to take music.

847
00:42:46,680 --> 00:42:49,120
Speaker 1: I just didn't feel like just because I can sing

848
00:42:49,200 --> 00:42:51,800
Speaker 1: and I like singing, like I can do anything special

849
00:42:51,880 --> 00:42:55,120
Speaker 1: with it, like make it a career or whatever. So yeah,

850
00:42:55,200 --> 00:42:57,800
Speaker 1: America's got talent just kind of came out of nowhere.

851
00:42:57,840 --> 00:43:01,279
Speaker 1: That happened. Yeah, I was in Live with my m

852
00:43:01,360 --> 00:43:03,279
Speaker 1: b A when a g T happened. One of my

853
00:43:03,360 --> 00:43:05,480
Speaker 1: best friends signed me up for the show without telling me.

854
00:43:05,760 --> 00:43:09,360
Speaker 1: That's how that happened. She had been telling me, threatening

855
00:43:09,440 --> 00:43:12,279
Speaker 1: me like because I what I something I've always done

856
00:43:12,400 --> 00:43:15,360
Speaker 1: is like sin covers and like send my friends and

857
00:43:15,440 --> 00:43:18,399
Speaker 1: my family but never like posted anywhere. And she would

858
00:43:18,400 --> 00:43:20,000
Speaker 1: just always be like, why are you sending this to me?

859
00:43:20,120 --> 00:43:23,000
Speaker 1: Like I can't do anything with this, like like send

860
00:43:23,080 --> 00:43:24,799
Speaker 1: this to someone who can do something with it, sending

861
00:43:24,840 --> 00:43:27,040
Speaker 1: to America's Got Talent, sending to American Idol, you know,

862
00:43:27,160 --> 00:43:29,400
Speaker 1: do something, and I'll just be like now, you know

863
00:43:30,120 --> 00:43:32,160
Speaker 1: now not really like I'm good, Like I'm not gonna

864
00:43:32,200 --> 00:43:34,279
Speaker 1: I'm not gonna put myself out there. And so she

865
00:43:34,480 --> 00:43:36,120
Speaker 1: just got sick of it, and then she just like

866
00:43:36,719 --> 00:43:40,279
Speaker 1: went online and applied on my behalf and and just

867
00:43:40,440 --> 00:43:42,640
Speaker 1: basically sent one of these clips I'm always sending to

868
00:43:42,719 --> 00:43:46,080
Speaker 1: her and posted it like attached to the application. She

869
00:43:46,239 --> 00:43:49,160
Speaker 1: did the whole thing and like sent it and then

870
00:43:49,719 --> 00:43:55,759
Speaker 1: look look like she she got sick. No she's not.

871
00:43:56,040 --> 00:43:58,600
Speaker 1: She was not like she literally actually changed my life,

872
00:43:58,680 --> 00:44:00,920
Speaker 1: like like when I think about it, she is the

873
00:44:01,000 --> 00:44:02,840
Speaker 1: reason why all this happened. If she didn't do that,

874
00:44:03,640 --> 00:44:06,040
Speaker 1: like she like she I just woke up one morning

875
00:44:06,200 --> 00:44:08,960
Speaker 1: and and she had forwarded like the application to me,

876
00:44:09,080 --> 00:44:11,680
Speaker 1: like look what I did. It's done, and I put

877
00:44:11,719 --> 00:44:13,719
Speaker 1: in my email so like if they reject you, like

878
00:44:13,920 --> 00:44:15,479
Speaker 1: you're not even going to see it. I'm just letting

879
00:44:15,480 --> 00:44:18,160
Speaker 1: you know that this has been done. And so I

880
00:44:18,320 --> 00:44:21,680
Speaker 1: was just like thaying, I mean it's done. So months passed,

881
00:44:21,840 --> 00:44:28,280
Speaker 1: nothing happened, no response, and then like November, no Saturday,

882
00:44:28,840 --> 00:44:31,440
Speaker 1: like eight am, like I got this phone call from

883
00:44:31,480 --> 00:44:34,440
Speaker 1: a lady. Her name was Deak, and she said she

884
00:44:34,680 --> 00:44:37,839
Speaker 1: saw my applications, she read about my story and oh

885
00:44:37,920 --> 00:44:39,759
Speaker 1: my god, like they think that they would want me

886
00:44:39,840 --> 00:44:44,399
Speaker 1: on the show, and that's all she wrote. That's it, Chah.

887
00:44:44,560 --> 00:44:47,880
Speaker 1: I remember watching perform and when Simon hit that gold

888
00:44:48,000 --> 00:44:54,440
Speaker 1: buzzer happy thank you. So man, that's still like the

889
00:44:54,560 --> 00:44:58,240
Speaker 1: most like unbelievable things to happen in my life, honestly,

890
00:44:58,320 --> 00:45:01,839
Speaker 1: one like top top ten for or like no expectation.

891
00:45:02,520 --> 00:45:06,160
Speaker 1: I remember thinking like I completely blew that. Like I

892
00:45:06,239 --> 00:45:09,920
Speaker 1: felt like I felt like I messed up the entire performance.

893
00:45:10,000 --> 00:45:12,320
Speaker 1: I was not happy, and I just felt like, Okay,

894
00:45:12,360 --> 00:45:14,439
Speaker 1: well you know, I did my best and I'm ready

895
00:45:14,520 --> 00:45:16,919
Speaker 1: to go. It's cool. I'm just glad I was giving

896
00:45:16,960 --> 00:45:19,400
Speaker 1: this opportunity. I already had my thank you speech planned

897
00:45:19,400 --> 00:45:22,759
Speaker 1: out and everything, so like seeing him reach around and

898
00:45:22,920 --> 00:45:28,279
Speaker 1: do that like he loves you. Honestly, I feel like

899
00:45:28,400 --> 00:45:30,560
Speaker 1: he definitely took a light thing to me. I'm not

900
00:45:30,600 --> 00:45:32,800
Speaker 1: even gonna lie like I he made me feel like

901
00:45:33,719 --> 00:45:35,960
Speaker 1: not just like like in my voice, but like as

902
00:45:36,000 --> 00:45:38,680
Speaker 1: a person, I feel like he vised with me a lot.

903
00:45:38,840 --> 00:45:42,040
Speaker 1: And that's a big deal for like for me because

904
00:45:42,120 --> 00:45:43,680
Speaker 1: you know it's Simon, you know, and you know, as

905
00:45:43,680 --> 00:45:46,000
Speaker 1: a singer you can't help, but like you know, care

906
00:45:46,040 --> 00:45:48,239
Speaker 1: about what he says or what he thinks about what

907
00:45:48,440 --> 00:45:50,840
Speaker 1: you do so or how you sound, you know, So

908
00:45:51,000 --> 00:45:53,879
Speaker 1: it was really cool to just have someone like him

909
00:45:53,920 --> 00:45:58,720
Speaker 1: to have his support was extremely validating, you know, especially

910
00:45:59,080 --> 00:46:00,560
Speaker 1: in the beginning of the show, or like I just

911
00:46:00,719 --> 00:46:03,000
Speaker 1: felt for a while like why am I really here?

912
00:46:03,080 --> 00:46:04,879
Speaker 1: Like is it for my voice? Like do I really

913
00:46:04,920 --> 00:46:06,680
Speaker 1: did I really earn the spot? Or is it just

914
00:46:06,960 --> 00:46:08,320
Speaker 1: because of my story? Because I don't want to be

915
00:46:08,400 --> 00:46:10,080
Speaker 1: here from my story? Like this is not because I

916
00:46:10,080 --> 00:46:14,000
Speaker 1: got like the best stories like this is that sometimes

917
00:46:14,239 --> 00:46:18,600
Speaker 1: stain things um definitely for America's about talent. Like the

918
00:46:18,680 --> 00:46:22,680
Speaker 1: beginning of that entire process, I felt like do I

919
00:46:22,880 --> 00:46:25,279
Speaker 1: really like did I really? Like I just feel like

920
00:46:25,600 --> 00:46:27,759
Speaker 1: what if I'm in someone else spot? Like what if

921
00:46:27,760 --> 00:46:29,600
Speaker 1: I'm here just because of my story? Like I don't

922
00:46:29,600 --> 00:46:32,600
Speaker 1: want that? And every time throughout the entire process, like

923
00:46:33,480 --> 00:46:35,480
Speaker 1: I would just pray because I was just like I

924
00:46:35,680 --> 00:46:39,040
Speaker 1: was praying like incessantly throughout this entire thing, and I

925
00:46:39,080 --> 00:46:41,120
Speaker 1: would just tell God, look like I don't want to

926
00:46:41,160 --> 00:46:43,040
Speaker 1: be here for my story, Like just if this is

927
00:46:43,120 --> 00:46:46,120
Speaker 1: the round where I get eliminated, like let it be done.

928
00:46:46,680 --> 00:46:48,560
Speaker 1: Like I don't want every step of the way. I

929
00:46:48,680 --> 00:46:51,160
Speaker 1: just don't want to keep being here if I'm not

930
00:46:51,239 --> 00:46:53,480
Speaker 1: supposed to be here because of my voice. Please, I

931
00:46:53,560 --> 00:46:55,920
Speaker 1: don't want any favors. I don't want any of that, Like,

932
00:46:56,080 --> 00:46:58,399
Speaker 1: just get me out of here once you think it's

933
00:46:58,440 --> 00:46:59,680
Speaker 1: time for me to get out of here. But like

934
00:47:00,640 --> 00:47:03,400
Speaker 1: I mean, it just never happened, you know. So the

935
00:47:03,560 --> 00:47:06,080
Speaker 1: more I realized that, like the more time passed and

936
00:47:06,120 --> 00:47:08,520
Speaker 1: I was still on there, it just allowed me to

937
00:47:08,600 --> 00:47:11,160
Speaker 1: believe more and more in the fact that like, yes,

938
00:47:11,239 --> 00:47:13,640
Speaker 1: my story, I mean, they do like a good story, true,

939
00:47:14,000 --> 00:47:16,600
Speaker 1: But like I had to start believing at some point

940
00:47:16,680 --> 00:47:18,920
Speaker 1: that hey, like you know, that is not the only

941
00:47:18,960 --> 00:47:20,680
Speaker 1: reason you're here. When you got to the point where

942
00:47:20,719 --> 00:47:24,080
Speaker 1: America was like voting, that really showed me that, like

943
00:47:24,239 --> 00:47:26,879
Speaker 1: people really felt like okay, like this girl can sing,

944
00:47:27,080 --> 00:47:29,200
Speaker 1: so I mean, And then also having the support of

945
00:47:29,239 --> 00:47:32,200
Speaker 1: someone like Samon helped in that belief as well, Like hey,

946
00:47:32,600 --> 00:47:35,279
Speaker 1: like yes, your story is really cool, but like guess what,

947
00:47:35,480 --> 00:47:37,840
Speaker 1: like you wouldn't be here just because of that, So

948
00:47:38,480 --> 00:47:40,560
Speaker 1: it took me a while. I'm not gonna lie until today.

949
00:47:40,600 --> 00:47:42,800
Speaker 1: I still kind of struggle with that honestly, where I

950
00:47:42,880 --> 00:47:46,759
Speaker 1: feel like, that's the Imposteri syndrome. Look, I think that's

951
00:47:46,800 --> 00:47:52,160
Speaker 1: what it is. Actually, yeah, you know so therapist and

952
00:47:52,360 --> 00:47:56,760
Speaker 1: she specializes in ampostis syndrome and her studies it shows

953
00:47:56,840 --> 00:47:59,040
Speaker 1: up a lot in black women. That's exactly what it was.

954
00:47:59,360 --> 00:48:02,800
Speaker 1: There is Yeah, I'll give you, I seen you a

955
00:48:02,840 --> 00:48:05,719
Speaker 1: link once that interview drops, but that's exactly what it was.

956
00:48:06,000 --> 00:48:08,200
Speaker 1: And for some reason, like I cannot wait up to

957
00:48:08,360 --> 00:48:10,560
Speaker 1: read more than to interview her to figure it out.

958
00:48:10,920 --> 00:48:13,040
Speaker 1: But even like and this is like off the topic,

959
00:48:13,320 --> 00:48:15,960
Speaker 1: I was watching set it off right, And it was

960
00:48:16,000 --> 00:48:18,120
Speaker 1: a scene where Jada Pinket Smith was with was with

961
00:48:18,480 --> 00:48:22,239
Speaker 1: Blair Underwood, and she was questioning herself about why she

962
00:48:22,280 --> 00:48:23,960
Speaker 1: shouldn't be there, and I'm like, oh my god, and

963
00:48:24,640 --> 00:48:32,479
Speaker 1: thumping around all this time, we just have yes, Yeah,

964
00:48:34,000 --> 00:48:35,960
Speaker 1: that's what I'm saying. So that's exactly what it was.

965
00:48:36,000 --> 00:48:38,120
Speaker 1: Because you can sing and I ain't gonna be one

966
00:48:38,120 --> 00:48:39,640
Speaker 1: of them. I knowing black people that actually just sing

967
00:48:39,800 --> 00:48:43,719
Speaker 1: on the show but you can't really see. But for

968
00:48:43,840 --> 00:48:46,800
Speaker 1: you to think that that's what it was, man, it

969
00:48:47,000 --> 00:48:48,600
Speaker 1: was definitely bad for me at the beginning. I'm not

970
00:48:48,600 --> 00:48:51,360
Speaker 1: gonna lie like I still I cried a lot, Like

971
00:48:51,440 --> 00:48:54,080
Speaker 1: I told my mom, like, look like are you sure?

972
00:48:55,400 --> 00:48:57,879
Speaker 1: Like I don't even know, Like I just have all

973
00:48:57,960 --> 00:49:00,320
Speaker 1: this doubt about like you know, this is something I

974
00:49:00,360 --> 00:49:02,719
Speaker 1: guess I don't know something I've always loved to do,

975
00:49:02,960 --> 00:49:05,400
Speaker 1: the singing, Like I've always loved this and I've always

976
00:49:05,480 --> 00:49:07,520
Speaker 1: enjoyed and I've always felt like my voice was good.

977
00:49:07,600 --> 00:49:10,400
Speaker 1: But then now that I was in this pressure situation

978
00:49:10,520 --> 00:49:12,480
Speaker 1: where someone was gonna be telling me whether or not

979
00:49:12,560 --> 00:49:14,920
Speaker 1: they thought it was good, it just made it so different.

980
00:49:14,960 --> 00:49:16,680
Speaker 1: It was like, Okay, I think I'm good, but like

981
00:49:17,480 --> 00:49:18,920
Speaker 1: what if these people don't think I'm good? What if

982
00:49:18,960 --> 00:49:21,200
Speaker 1: they just think my story is good? Like it's just man's.

983
00:49:21,320 --> 00:49:24,600
Speaker 1: I struggled so hard, and it's definitely something I still

984
00:49:24,600 --> 00:49:27,959
Speaker 1: struggle with now, because you know, trying to release music,

985
00:49:28,080 --> 00:49:30,680
Speaker 1: I'm just like, hey, is anyone really gonna care about

986
00:49:30,760 --> 00:49:33,279
Speaker 1: like the music that I put out there? Like I

987
00:49:33,320 --> 00:49:35,719
Speaker 1: don't know, man, I just the only way to do it,

988
00:49:35,760 --> 00:49:37,719
Speaker 1: obviously is to try and see what happens. But it

989
00:49:37,800 --> 00:49:42,279
Speaker 1: definitely your path. And girl, I'm telling you, I when

990
00:49:42,320 --> 00:49:44,080
Speaker 1: I looked at you, I don't I just see a

991
00:49:44,200 --> 00:49:47,200
Speaker 1: woman that's out there just chasing her dreams no matter what.

992
00:49:47,400 --> 00:49:49,799
Speaker 1: So like, don't think like that. And you have been

993
00:49:49,880 --> 00:49:56,680
Speaker 1: in so many dope places like girl, thank you and

994
00:49:56,880 --> 00:49:58,840
Speaker 1: thank you. Yeah, I'm gonna just keep trying, you know,

995
00:49:58,880 --> 00:50:01,040
Speaker 1: I'm gonna I'm just gonna keep on my thing and yeah,

996
00:50:01,160 --> 00:50:03,640
Speaker 1: it's just your How has your life change since, uh,

997
00:50:03,840 --> 00:50:07,400
Speaker 1: since becoming a finalist on America's Got Talent? Oh dramatically

998
00:50:07,520 --> 00:50:11,640
Speaker 1: for sure, traveling so much more than I've ever done.

999
00:50:11,920 --> 00:50:16,120
Speaker 1: I'm um, performing in venues that I just I only

1000
00:50:16,200 --> 00:50:19,520
Speaker 1: saw on TV, you know, and go into places that

1001
00:50:19,760 --> 00:50:22,600
Speaker 1: like I only ever dreamed about. Like I just I

1002
00:50:22,719 --> 00:50:26,320
Speaker 1: just can't believe like the amount of opportunities that have

1003
00:50:26,480 --> 00:50:30,600
Speaker 1: come from that platform. Honestly, It's it's really been like

1004
00:50:30,880 --> 00:50:34,400
Speaker 1: life changing. And and then the people that I've met

1005
00:50:34,440 --> 00:50:37,400
Speaker 1: as well, like the amazing connections I've made with like

1006
00:50:37,600 --> 00:50:40,000
Speaker 1: amazing people from all over the world. It really just

1007
00:50:40,360 --> 00:50:42,520
Speaker 1: it blows my mind every day that like this is

1008
00:50:42,600 --> 00:50:44,960
Speaker 1: my life. Now, I had no idea what I was

1009
00:50:45,000 --> 00:50:46,719
Speaker 1: gonna do in my life, but I sure as hell

1010
00:50:46,800 --> 00:50:48,400
Speaker 1: didn't think it was going to be anything like this.

1011
00:50:49,080 --> 00:50:51,960
Speaker 1: So this is all just I still have this feeling

1012
00:50:52,040 --> 00:50:54,480
Speaker 1: of like it also has this feeling of novelty to it,

1013
00:50:54,560 --> 00:50:57,239
Speaker 1: where it just all still all feels kind of new

1014
00:50:57,440 --> 00:51:01,680
Speaker 1: and and exciting. And I hope that never changes, you know,

1015
00:51:01,760 --> 00:51:04,920
Speaker 1: I hope I I maintained this feeling of just like

1016
00:51:05,040 --> 00:51:09,600
Speaker 1: awe and gratefulness and humility that just comes with comes

1017
00:51:09,640 --> 00:51:11,880
Speaker 1: with them, just all these opportunities that I'm getting, you know.

1018
00:51:12,040 --> 00:51:14,320
Speaker 1: So yeah, that's really what it is. Like, I'm just

1019
00:51:14,440 --> 00:51:16,680
Speaker 1: I'm really enjoying the ride. I guess that's the way.

1020
00:51:16,719 --> 00:51:19,400
Speaker 1: That's the way to put it. Do you get nervous

1021
00:51:19,440 --> 00:51:20,960
Speaker 1: because I know you fly a lot. Do you get

1022
00:51:21,000 --> 00:51:24,920
Speaker 1: nervous when you have the flag? That's thankfully something I've

1023
00:51:24,960 --> 00:51:27,919
Speaker 1: actually never had to deal with honestly ever, even since

1024
00:51:27,960 --> 00:51:32,600
Speaker 1: the accident, like because it just felt like I brought

1025
00:51:32,640 --> 00:51:34,680
Speaker 1: after the accident happened. You know, I had to be

1026
00:51:34,800 --> 00:51:37,320
Speaker 1: flown and I remember this fight, but I did have

1027
00:51:37,400 --> 00:51:39,000
Speaker 1: to get on the plane to get to South Africa,

1028
00:51:39,040 --> 00:51:41,520
Speaker 1: which is where they actually treated me at first, and

1029
00:51:41,600 --> 00:51:44,800
Speaker 1: then after that it had to be flown back to Nigeria.

1030
00:51:45,000 --> 00:51:47,160
Speaker 1: I don't remember that fight either, but then I had

1031
00:51:47,200 --> 00:51:49,920
Speaker 1: to be flown to America from Nigeria to get treatment here.

1032
00:51:50,400 --> 00:51:52,760
Speaker 1: So it just felt like, you know, despite what happened

1033
00:51:52,760 --> 00:51:55,319
Speaker 1: to me, I just can't seem to avoid this flying thing.

1034
00:51:55,960 --> 00:51:57,600
Speaker 1: What am I supposed to do? You know, just not

1035
00:51:57,760 --> 00:51:59,640
Speaker 1: go anywhere? And that's the only other option is to

1036
00:51:59,719 --> 00:52:03,319
Speaker 1: go only where you can drive to, And like that's

1037
00:52:03,360 --> 00:52:06,279
Speaker 1: like the most limiting life I can think of. You know,

1038
00:52:06,640 --> 00:52:09,520
Speaker 1: how is I going to How was I going to

1039
00:52:09,680 --> 00:52:12,520
Speaker 1: live my life the way I want to live my

1040
00:52:12,680 --> 00:52:15,239
Speaker 1: life as fully as possible for all those who passed to?

1041
00:52:15,239 --> 00:52:16,520
Speaker 1: Where am I going to do that? If I only

1042
00:52:16,640 --> 00:52:19,480
Speaker 1: go where I can drive to? It just wasn't practical.

1043
00:52:19,640 --> 00:52:22,160
Speaker 1: So before I even got a chance to be afraid

1044
00:52:22,200 --> 00:52:24,400
Speaker 1: of flying again, I mean, I was already on a

1045
00:52:24,520 --> 00:52:28,200
Speaker 1: plane coming here to get treatment, so I just naturally

1046
00:52:28,360 --> 00:52:32,399
Speaker 1: just didn't really think anything of it. Also, like, look,

1047
00:52:32,520 --> 00:52:36,320
Speaker 1: the odds of being on another plane that crashes are like,

1048
00:52:36,600 --> 00:52:38,840
Speaker 1: I feel like I have the best odds now in

1049
00:52:39,040 --> 00:52:42,680
Speaker 1: like life, So my money I got my money on

1050
00:52:42,800 --> 00:52:49,600
Speaker 1: you too, exactly, So I'm just like, look at this point,

1051
00:52:49,920 --> 00:52:58,120
Speaker 1: like catching at this point of your life, like if

1052
00:52:58,120 --> 00:53:00,239
Speaker 1: I want to play, I'm like everyone just be y'all,

1053
00:53:00,320 --> 00:53:03,120
Speaker 1: y'all just be cool. I'm here, So God got us,

1054
00:53:03,280 --> 00:53:06,040
Speaker 1: like we go. The worst has already happened to me.

1055
00:53:06,200 --> 00:53:09,160
Speaker 1: So that's cool. We got, we got, We'll be fine.

1056
00:53:09,480 --> 00:53:12,000
Speaker 1: So that's really that's another like spinne put on it

1057
00:53:12,120 --> 00:53:14,680
Speaker 1: like just you know, it's just it's it's happened already.

1058
00:53:14,719 --> 00:53:16,799
Speaker 1: The worst thing people think about when these fly has

1059
00:53:16,840 --> 00:53:19,319
Speaker 1: already happened. So I'm just like, look at this point,

1060
00:53:19,400 --> 00:53:21,200
Speaker 1: let's just let's just live our lives and just see

1061
00:53:21,239 --> 00:53:23,759
Speaker 1: what happened. So yeah, that's it. Came back with a

1062
00:53:23,840 --> 00:53:35,640
Speaker 1: whole voice, a whole career. Oh god, it's so funny. Yeah,

1063
00:53:35,719 --> 00:53:38,160
Speaker 1: before we release. So you are a walking inspiration, not

1064
00:53:38,840 --> 00:53:41,480
Speaker 1: only to so many people, including myself. Like I'm so

1065
00:53:41,600 --> 00:53:44,120
Speaker 1: happy that we were able to do this call because

1066
00:53:44,120 --> 00:53:45,759
Speaker 1: I hear you over cooking. What do you what are

1067
00:53:45,760 --> 00:53:52,080
Speaker 1: you cooking? I don't cooking, you know, Yes, I am

1068
00:53:52,239 --> 00:53:56,600
Speaker 1: I'm just taking Yes, how did you get That's exactly

1069
00:53:56,640 --> 00:53:59,680
Speaker 1: what I'm doing. I was putting on some chicken. Yes,

1070
00:54:00,640 --> 00:54:03,000
Speaker 1: you're just like you have eyes here, like what's going on?

1071
00:54:03,400 --> 00:54:05,680
Speaker 1: Like this is so funny. I was just making some

1072
00:54:05,800 --> 00:54:12,240
Speaker 1: chicken thing for my mom and I. Yeah, we lived together.

1073
00:54:12,400 --> 00:54:18,439
Speaker 1: She's here with I'm gonna tell her hi before we lease,

1074
00:54:18,480 --> 00:54:20,279
Speaker 1: I want to enjoy the night with your mother. M

1075
00:54:20,360 --> 00:54:22,319
Speaker 1: But there's the last advice she would give to those

1076
00:54:22,400 --> 00:54:26,279
Speaker 1: who are trying to continue life after trauma. I would

1077
00:54:26,320 --> 00:54:32,040
Speaker 1: tell them that I believe in them. You know, I

1078
00:54:32,440 --> 00:54:35,600
Speaker 1: understand from a very personal place how hard it can

1079
00:54:35,640 --> 00:54:38,480
Speaker 1: be to see, you know, any kind of you know,

1080
00:54:38,680 --> 00:54:40,880
Speaker 1: um like at the end the tunnel, when you're in

1081
00:54:40,960 --> 00:54:42,960
Speaker 1: the tunnel. You know, I understand, like I got to

1082
00:54:43,320 --> 00:54:46,600
Speaker 1: there were times during my surgery and all my recuperation,

1083
00:54:46,800 --> 00:54:50,400
Speaker 1: my journey where I couldn't see this, like, you know,

1084
00:54:50,880 --> 00:54:53,959
Speaker 1: life after the hospital that everyone was talking about, because

1085
00:54:54,000 --> 00:54:56,239
Speaker 1: all I was seeing was the hospital. All I was

1086
00:54:56,320 --> 00:54:58,640
Speaker 1: seeing was surgery, and all I had to look forward

1087
00:54:58,680 --> 00:55:01,680
Speaker 1: to was more surgery. So when people would tell me, hey, like,

1088
00:55:01,800 --> 00:55:03,520
Speaker 1: you know, there's gonna be a time when you're gonna

1089
00:55:03,560 --> 00:55:05,400
Speaker 1: look back on all this, it was just all like

1090
00:55:05,600 --> 00:55:08,239
Speaker 1: noise to me. You know, So I do understand, like

1091
00:55:08,360 --> 00:55:10,879
Speaker 1: when you're in darkness, it's so freaking hard to see

1092
00:55:11,400 --> 00:55:13,719
Speaker 1: like anything else, and I understand that, but I want

1093
00:55:13,760 --> 00:55:16,040
Speaker 1: to also be the example for them, to show them

1094
00:55:16,480 --> 00:55:19,399
Speaker 1: in a very real way that there is so much

1095
00:55:19,520 --> 00:55:21,640
Speaker 1: life to look forward to after what they're going through,

1096
00:55:21,920 --> 00:55:26,680
Speaker 1: and not just like living and just surviving, but thriving,

1097
00:55:27,000 --> 00:55:29,200
Speaker 1: you know, and thriving in what you love to do

1098
00:55:29,280 --> 00:55:31,320
Speaker 1: and what you want to do with your life. I

1099
00:55:31,440 --> 00:55:33,839
Speaker 1: want people to I want people to see my life

1100
00:55:33,880 --> 00:55:36,360
Speaker 1: as an example of the fact that there is a

1101
00:55:36,560 --> 00:55:40,879
Speaker 1: chance still too to thrive even after what they've all

1102
00:55:40,920 --> 00:55:43,600
Speaker 1: gone through. It doesn't have to be something as like

1103
00:55:43,760 --> 00:55:46,200
Speaker 1: dramatic as a plane crash, whatever it is that might

1104
00:55:46,280 --> 00:55:50,520
Speaker 1: be causing you trauma or keeping you in darkness. The

1105
00:55:50,640 --> 00:55:52,759
Speaker 1: fact that you're still here means that God's not done.

1106
00:55:52,880 --> 00:55:56,000
Speaker 1: Like you're still here because there's still something that you're

1107
00:55:56,040 --> 00:55:58,200
Speaker 1: supposed to do with this life that you have, and

1108
00:55:58,400 --> 00:56:01,640
Speaker 1: you owe it to yourself after all the darkness and

1109
00:56:01,719 --> 00:56:04,080
Speaker 1: struggles you've been through. You owe it to the future

1110
00:56:04,200 --> 00:56:07,880
Speaker 1: you to live on and endear and see the reason

1111
00:56:08,000 --> 00:56:10,759
Speaker 1: for everything that you're going through, to to to draw

1112
00:56:10,920 --> 00:56:15,400
Speaker 1: them what's the word to see the results of of

1113
00:56:15,680 --> 00:56:18,719
Speaker 1: of everything you've gone through. You know the future you

1114
00:56:18,880 --> 00:56:20,920
Speaker 1: deserves to see that, you know, because you're going to

1115
00:56:21,000 --> 00:56:23,439
Speaker 1: be more resilient. You know, you're gonna be You're gonna

1116
00:56:23,480 --> 00:56:25,960
Speaker 1: be so much stronger for everything you're going through right

1117
00:56:26,040 --> 00:56:28,240
Speaker 1: now and all that, all this is going to equip

1118
00:56:28,320 --> 00:56:30,759
Speaker 1: you for even more things that are going to come

1119
00:56:30,840 --> 00:56:32,880
Speaker 1: up in your life. Literally, you're gonna be so much stronger,

1120
00:56:33,120 --> 00:56:34,839
Speaker 1: strong enough to take care of those things that are

1121
00:56:34,880 --> 00:56:36,759
Speaker 1: coming up in your life too. So I feel like

1122
00:56:37,120 --> 00:56:39,240
Speaker 1: I feel like that's what everything is. You know, everything

1123
00:56:39,280 --> 00:56:41,440
Speaker 1: that we go through is just another way to build

1124
00:56:42,000 --> 00:56:46,680
Speaker 1: more resilience for something that the you of right now

1125
00:56:46,840 --> 00:56:49,360
Speaker 1: cannot deal with, you know, the way that the future

1126
00:56:49,440 --> 00:56:51,279
Speaker 1: you can. So yeah, I want my life to be

1127
00:56:51,400 --> 00:56:53,120
Speaker 1: that example for people, and I want people to be

1128
00:56:53,160 --> 00:56:58,319
Speaker 1: able to see that for themselves eventually as well. Yeah. Well,

1129
00:56:58,360 --> 00:57:00,560
Speaker 1: I want to say thank you so much. I really

1130
00:57:00,640 --> 00:57:03,400
Speaker 1: appreciate you. Like I'm gonna definitely keep in contact with

1131
00:57:03,480 --> 00:57:07,719
Speaker 1: you please. Yes, Yes, this has been such a treat,

1132
00:57:07,800 --> 00:57:09,880
Speaker 1: like you definitely gave me, just like just looking at

1133
00:57:09,920 --> 00:57:12,000
Speaker 1: your story has inspired me, like in so many ways,

1134
00:57:12,120 --> 00:57:13,480
Speaker 1: or what I want to do with my platform and

1135
00:57:13,640 --> 00:57:16,200
Speaker 1: just to get more people stories out there, because everybody

1136
00:57:16,280 --> 00:57:23,160
Speaker 1: needs some inspiration child. We're going through everyone, yeah, So

1137
00:57:23,280 --> 00:57:25,000
Speaker 1: I think it helps when people can see that they're

1138
00:57:25,040 --> 00:57:28,160
Speaker 1: not alone, you know, right. So if you have any questions,

1139
00:57:28,200 --> 00:57:30,040
Speaker 1: comments with concerns, or if I want to ask my

1140
00:57:30,600 --> 00:57:32,640
Speaker 1: guests any questions, please make sure to email me a

1141
00:57:32,720 --> 00:57:36,320
Speaker 1: hello at the PSG podcast dot com. And until next time,

1142
00:57:36,320 --> 00:57:39,840
Speaker 1: because I know my guest is over there cooking, y'all

1143
00:57:39,920 --> 00:57:42,840
Speaker 1: be safe and until next time later bye,