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Speaker 1: I caught my boyfriend texting other women. I want to

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Speaker 1: write up. So me and my boyfriend have been dating

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Speaker 1: for a year and seven months. We first started talking

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Speaker 1: at the end of twenty twenty one. We've been on

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Speaker 1: and off, not officially since then, just because I felt

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Speaker 1: as if he wasn't as mature as he would say

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Speaker 1: or do things that I didn't like, so I broke

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Speaker 1: it off. But things seemed better when we reconnected in

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Speaker 1: January of twenty twenty three. By the way, this comes

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Speaker 1: from Open Cut twenty seven for fifty four on the artilage. Okay, storytime,

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Speaker 1: supredit Now it was great. He asked me to be

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Speaker 1: his girlfriend with roses and a nice dinner after that.

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Speaker 1: He deployed that year and came back this May of

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Speaker 1: twenty twenty four. Put an ICU in the comments. If

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Speaker 1: you see what I'm seeing, it doesn't seem good. Doesn't

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Speaker 1: seem good. We moved in together and everything. I'll backtrack

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Speaker 1: to the experience of the deployment. So he was a

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Speaker 1: pretty fit guy. He's one of those soon to be

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Speaker 1: pro fighters, so he took his fitness serious. Anyways, along

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Speaker 1: the deployment, I started to not hear from him as much,

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Speaker 1: and I had to realize that he's exhausted. We're in

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Speaker 1: different times zones. It's really a whole other story. So

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Speaker 1: fast forward. He started to gain weight because he was

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Speaker 1: injured and couldn't work out as he had done before.

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Speaker 1: He would take mental breaks and not text me for days.

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Speaker 1: He wouldn't relay that information to me until I got

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Speaker 1: upset and wanted to be done because I felt as

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Speaker 1: if the communication wasn't.

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Speaker 2: There, not good, This isn't looking good.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, you can create an arrangement that you know, where

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Speaker 1: he's not being exhausted or whatever, but he has to

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Speaker 1: be like, hey, can we do a new setup. Put

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Speaker 1: the expectation for the two of us that like, hey,

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Speaker 1: maybe I might not get back to you within the

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Speaker 1: day because whatever else.

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Speaker 2: Oh yeah, I'm just really exhausted with everything.

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Speaker 1: Is that okay with you? Would that make you? Would

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Speaker 1: these other things I could do to reach out to

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Speaker 1: you make you still feel solid?

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Speaker 2: Yeah? You need to communicate about lack of communication.

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Speaker 1: Need to figure that out. We got over all that.

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Speaker 1: We finally got to spend some time together in December

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Speaker 1: of twenty twenty three around Christmas. Mind you, I haven't

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Speaker 1: seen each other since March of twenty twenty three. Wow,

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Speaker 1: because he got deployed right who he was bigger, But

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Speaker 1: I loved him, so I'm just happy that I saw him.

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Speaker 1: We got a hotel. It wasn't the best experience because

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Speaker 1: I gifted him with some clothes, and basically during the

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Speaker 1: whole experience he seemed more irritated than normal and upset.

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Speaker 2: Wait, so you finally get to see him after months,

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Speaker 2: you get him a gift and he's like.

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Speaker 1: I am reading in between the lines here read him.

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Speaker 1: But I'm thinking that maybe the like Op got the clothes,

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Speaker 1: you know, before they met up, he's like gained some

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Speaker 1: weight or something, and he's now feeling insecure because the

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Speaker 1: clothes are not fitting. Like possibly may maybe maybe maybe

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Speaker 1: before the deployment, he was very calm and chill. He

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Speaker 1: never blew simple, inconvenient things out of proportion whatever. I

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Speaker 1: saw him again on February of twenty twenty four for

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Speaker 1: our first anniversary. He didn't get me anything. I decorated

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Speaker 1: a hotel room nice for us, got us wine, dressed

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Speaker 1: in lingerie. Whatever. We got past it. Op, He's always like,

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Speaker 1: we got past it, pasted it. But I'm like, you

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Speaker 1: just like are like you just ignored it. You're just

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Speaker 1: gritting your teeth like fine, and then you just take

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Speaker 1: another step, like he wasn't.

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Speaker 2: Talking to you, and then you met up, you got

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Speaker 2: him a gift, and he got upset. And then you

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Speaker 2: met up months later and you got him a gift again,

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Speaker 2: and he got you nothing. You're not getting past these

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Speaker 2: they're just compiling.

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Speaker 1: You're just getting through it.

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Speaker 2: Yeah. And the thing is, I think that when you

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Speaker 2: have these like long distance relationships like this, it's like, oh, well,

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Speaker 2: there's no you know, we're not fighting because you're just

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Speaker 2: not with each other.

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Speaker 1: Literally, you're not even talking. That's like the That's the

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Speaker 1: plot line of every single ninety day fiance couple, is

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Speaker 1: like they have this great relationship over text and then

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Speaker 1: they actually experience each other for real and then it

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Speaker 1: all goes terribly. Then he came back in May of

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Speaker 1: twenty twenty four and we moved in together. We plan

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Speaker 1: this out pre deployment. Everything has been good since he

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Speaker 1: came back. It felt like it was getting back to normal,

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Speaker 1: but I've always had a feeling that something just wasn't right.

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Speaker 1: I joked previously about me knowing his phone password. I'm

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Speaker 1: open to him having my phone or taking it whatever,

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Speaker 1: I don't care. This specific incidents happened this morning. I

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Speaker 1: was just scrolling on Instagram and saw that he liked

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Speaker 1: a female's post. No big deal, but I remembered him

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Speaker 1: not really being on Instagram, so I went to look

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Speaker 1: just to see if he had liked other women's posts,

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Speaker 1: and yes he did. It was a few of them

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Speaker 1: in bikinis and some he liked multiple posts. I confronted

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Speaker 1: him about it, and he said that he wouldn't do

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Speaker 1: it again, and how he knows those women. I very

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Speaker 1: quickly want to ask about this because I feel like

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Speaker 1: this is a there we we often talk about the

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Speaker 1: like going through the phone, ye, right, but this is

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Speaker 1: she's going through I believe it's like his public phone

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Speaker 1: public right. How do we feel about this? Sofia, what

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Speaker 1: are your thoughts here?

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Speaker 2: He does kind of suggest a lack of trust However,

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Speaker 2: in this case it does seem like slightly deserved. But yeah,

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Speaker 2: I think it kind of falls in line with what

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Speaker 2: I say about looking through the phone, like it's already

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Speaker 2: a sign that your relationship is declining.

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Speaker 1: Yes, great point.

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Speaker 2: So yeah, here it seems like we already know the

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Speaker 2: relationship is declining and this isn't going to help it totally.

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Speaker 2: But yeah, you're already on that track.

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Speaker 1: She both had the whole their whole history and track

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Speaker 1: record and the specific thing of like she saw him

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Speaker 1: like the bikinique posts, and I think that could Like

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Speaker 1: it's like, is this, you know, a friend and the

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Speaker 1: caption is like, oh, hey, hanging out with our old

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Speaker 1: or getting back a reunion for our college friend group

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Speaker 1: or something, or is it actually something else. She didn't

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Speaker 1: break into his phone, She didn't do anything. Oh, she

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Speaker 1: just looked at his public likes. This feels okay to me,

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Speaker 1: Like this feels different than looking through the text.

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Speaker 2: Oh, completely different, But I still do think it shows

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Speaker 2: a lack of trust that needs to be community.

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Speaker 1: Cracks were already there and this needs to be solved.

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Speaker 2: Yere per Like she's not doing anything wrong.

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Speaker 1: Not do anything wrong, but you know, like better to communicate.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, he's not good for your relationship.

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Speaker 1: Yeah this is true. Great point, Sophia, what a great host.

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Speaker 2: Do you want stuff?

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Speaker 1: I asked him to let me see his Instagram dms.

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Speaker 1: He went, but he didn't scroll down, So I immediately get

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Speaker 1: to thinking I saw one of the females DM and

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Speaker 1: he was hesitant to click it, and again I started

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Speaker 1: to wonder, So it seems like he's giving her like that.

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Speaker 2: He's like, here you go, yeah, here, here, here's my phone.

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Speaker 2: Can you read it?

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Speaker 1: Can you read it? Yeah? You saw it? There you go.

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Speaker 1: I don't care. It was before we were together officially.

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Speaker 1: So I brushed it off based on that encounter, and

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Speaker 1: my mind was just race. She keeps brushing it off.

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Speaker 1: But opie, you notice how you brush something off quote unquote,

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Speaker 1: but then it stays still there. You still hurt inside.

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Speaker 1: So one night, like last Monday, his phone was unlocked

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Speaker 1: on the floor. I went to his texts. Everything was

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Speaker 1: normal until I saw this one message. He was telling

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Speaker 1: a girl that he loved her, calling her a wife,

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Speaker 1: planning to go to a hotel with him before he

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Speaker 1: officially came back home. He promised and swore to God.

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Speaker 1: They never met up real He sent her revealing videos.

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Speaker 1: The last message he sent her was on June of

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Speaker 1: twenty twenty four. We moved together in may Aka. He

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Speaker 1: spent these He sent these spency texts after they moved

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Speaker 1: in together, which they were so ready, you're already together,

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Speaker 1: already together, but it is. It is like even it's

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Speaker 1: even layer worse, but you're already so layers deep of

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Speaker 1: worseness terribleness.

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Speaker 2: You can't brush this off.

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Speaker 1: Ope, you can't brush it off.

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Speaker 2: Face it.

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Speaker 1: We need a steam cleaner to get your home.

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Speaker 2: Cleaner and good for euop, we have one that's true.

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Speaker 1: So the message stated girl's name, I'm drunk. I love you.

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Speaker 1: What a poet. After that, few days or weeks later,

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Speaker 1: she was telling him how they should be married by

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Speaker 1: now and all that, but he really wasn't saying anything

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Speaker 1: back related to that. I confronted him about it, and

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Speaker 1: he said he stopped texting her because he realized it

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Speaker 1: was wrong. Wow, oh my god, how amazing he realized

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Speaker 1: it was wrong.

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Speaker 2: Sophia, I'm drunk, I love you. We should be married

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Speaker 2: by now. Stop texting me please? Wow?

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Speaker 1: Hi coo, Hi coo. Nice job that this is an

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Speaker 1: actual applause than my applause before was a completely sarcastical sorry,

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Speaker 1: what did you just say? I was saying, like, He's like, oh,

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Speaker 1: I just stopped texting her because I realized it was wrong.

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Speaker 2: But he was like, I realized he was doing something bad.

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Speaker 2: I shouldn't have done it. You're welcome, babe.

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Speaker 1: Bro has fumbled the bag so hard at this point,

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Speaker 1: there's there's no there's no going back, sir, So do

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Speaker 1: do do?

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Speaker 2: Do? Do?

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Speaker 1: And he started texting her when we broke up, like

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Speaker 1: at the end of the year for a little while.

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Speaker 1: But I still have yet to figure out if that's true.

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Speaker 1: When I went through his messages again, it stated that

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Speaker 1: they were texting January of twenty twenty three, and probably

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Speaker 1: more act to that, and of course the smoking gun.

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Speaker 1: Like super recently, I went through his Instagram to find

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Speaker 1: him dming multiple women and calling them pretty, asking for

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Speaker 1: their numbers, break.

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Speaker 2: Up with them, the relationship is over.

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Speaker 1: He is alf esteem coach. He has to get their

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Speaker 1: numbers so that way he can the Their affirmations have

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Speaker 1: to be forefront.

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Speaker 2: He started a small business, oh yeah, an entrepreneurs exactly

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Speaker 2: which people pay him, and he reaches out to them,

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Speaker 2: is this you're.

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Speaker 1: Pretty, Yeah, you're still I love you, I want to

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Speaker 1: marry you. I want to marry you as an affirmation

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Speaker 1: for you. That's not you know, this is not real

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Speaker 1: stuff here, but he should do.

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Speaker 2: After all of his his little spicy texting, he just

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Speaker 2: goes and those are the affirmations that I want you

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Speaker 2: to say to yourself in the mirror.

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Speaker 1: It's like the big news channels. Oh, this is just entertainment.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, for legal reasons. This is entertainment, my side business.

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Speaker 1: We're just having fun. But so to one girl, he

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Speaker 1: said that she can have his son complimenting them. This

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Speaker 1: was all between February and March of twenty twenty four.

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Speaker 1: I believe since then he deactivated his Instagram and blocks

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Speaker 1: the girl he was texting. I trusted him early on

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Speaker 1: in our relationship, but since deployment, I didn't feel as secure.

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Speaker 1: And now that we're staying together and I see that

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Speaker 1: he compromised our relationship with texts. I'm hurt. Even if

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Speaker 1: he didn't meet up with anyone, his choice of words

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Speaker 1: hurt me even more. It's beyond beyond. When he asked

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Speaker 1: about the girl he was texting, he said he didn't

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Speaker 1: know how to break it off. What do y'all think?

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Speaker 1: He told me his phone passed code, but then got

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Speaker 1: upset with me a few nights ago and said not

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Speaker 1: to sneak and go around through his phone and to

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Speaker 1: ask not in a regular voice but demanding. And I'm like,

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Speaker 1: why so you can say no, and hide things or

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Speaker 1: look over my shoulder to see what I'm doing. Let's

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Speaker 1: stop really quick. It's just insane. I mean, just dump them,

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Speaker 1: dump him. What are we doing going further down this road.

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Speaker 2: He's trying to blame this on you.

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Speaker 1: Trying to blame U on you.

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Speaker 2: The relationship is not working, there's no there's like a

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Speaker 2: lack of communication. He's cheating on you. You barely see him.

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Speaker 1: But you know what does work? Sofia, what tapping her

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Speaker 1: profile to join us? Every weekday at three pm PST.

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Speaker 1: You could be here adding in your own commentary on

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Speaker 1: this very infuriating situation. I've told him that I don't

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Speaker 1: trust him anymore, and how I will check his phone

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Speaker 1: if I get the chance. I told him that I

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Speaker 1: don't trust him anymore, and how I will check his

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Speaker 1: phone if I get the chance. I'm an open book.

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Speaker 1: I don't hide anything from him. I'm just trying to

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Speaker 1: give him a chance. But I'm not sure.

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Speaker 2: Don't give him a chance. Don't give it feels like, oh,

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Speaker 2: he's still on the fence.

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Speaker 1: There's literally so many relationship ending mistakes, yeah, that have

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Speaker 1: happened here.

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Speaker 2: Even before, like honestly, even before the spicy texting.

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Speaker 1: Yes, the fact that, yeah, he was constantly putting in

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Speaker 1: zero effort. You were putting in all the effort even

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Speaker 1: before the cheating. You found, dude, just just dump them.

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Speaker 1: We got one relevant comment to close out of the

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Speaker 1: story that we're pulling up right now here we go.

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Speaker 1: Brian or Mike said, so he's been cheating on you,

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Speaker 1: and your low key just letting him get away with it,

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Speaker 1: is what I got from that post. The reason he's

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Speaker 1: being demanding about you not going through his phone now

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Speaker 1: is because you've shown that being cheated on isn't a

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Speaker 1: deal breaker for you, that it'll just upset you, but

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Speaker 1: you won't leave. You're wasting your time. This is a

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Speaker 1: tale as old as time with people who are deployed.

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Speaker 1: Opie says, I wouldn't say I'm letting him as any

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Speaker 1: other person. I reacted in a way and stated that

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Speaker 1: if it happens again, I'm done. I think the comment

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Speaker 1: is totally true, but maybe like angled a little harshly.

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Speaker 1: I think Opi is just maybe she's scared of being alone.

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Speaker 1: I think probably like they have to go through this,

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Speaker 1: they live together, they have to go through the process

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Speaker 1: of like so maybe OPI is at that you know

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Speaker 1: this the seven cycles or whatever. She's still in the

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Speaker 1: stage where she hasn't fully accepted it yet. Yeah, but

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Speaker 1: I do think she is getting there.

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Speaker 2: She is kind of likes she.

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Speaker 1: Is allowing it to happen. I mean she is basically

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Speaker 1: by being like, hey, like I think I need to again.

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Speaker 2: She's pushing past it.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, she's pushing.

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Speaker 2: That's what she's doing. And that's not beneficial for her.

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Speaker 1: It's not beneficial for her, But guys, you know what's

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Speaker 1: beneficial for me getting Sophia completely out of my face

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Speaker 1: and just never seeing her again. Because ladies and gentlemen,

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Speaker 1: we have a very special person, our very own Samuel

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Speaker 1: Dotter by Sophia, just kidding. You're the greatest ever and

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Speaker 1: you're so awesome. Did Sophia tell the Breaking Finger story? Yes,

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Speaker 1: she did.