1
00:00:00,200 --> 00:00:02,360
Speaker 1: Hey, this is Sam, this is John, and we are

2
00:00:02,440 --> 00:00:05,720
Speaker 1: the founding hosts of Okay Storytime podcast.

3
00:00:05,320 --> 00:00:08,039
Speaker 2: And we have some foundational stories coming up for you.

4
00:00:08,200 --> 00:00:11,000
Speaker 1: But the thing is this foundation needs a little support

5
00:00:11,119 --> 00:00:14,440
Speaker 1: from these sponsors. So stick around two minutes we'll get

6
00:00:14,440 --> 00:00:15,400
Speaker 1: into the episode.

7
00:00:16,079 --> 00:00:18,840
Speaker 3: I walked out on a double date because I already

8
00:00:18,920 --> 00:00:20,000
Speaker 3: rejected her.

9
00:00:19,920 --> 00:00:21,880
Speaker 4: Before twice the Pride, Double the Fall.

10
00:00:22,040 --> 00:00:24,720
Speaker 3: To give you a little background to the situation, I

11
00:00:24,800 --> 00:00:28,000
Speaker 3: twenty five male, met Jane, twenty four female, through Joe's

12
00:00:28,280 --> 00:00:31,720
Speaker 3: twenty six male girlfriend at her birthday party last year.

13
00:00:32,200 --> 00:00:33,879
Speaker 2: At first, Jane was fun to talk to.

14
00:00:34,040 --> 00:00:36,760
Speaker 3: But not even an hour later, Jane was really into

15
00:00:36,800 --> 00:00:39,440
Speaker 3: me and tried really badly to hit on me during

16
00:00:39,479 --> 00:00:42,280
Speaker 3: the party, which pretty much ruined my time there as

17
00:00:42,320 --> 00:00:44,640
Speaker 3: the feeling was not mutual in the slightest.

18
00:00:45,159 --> 00:00:47,320
Speaker 2: Also, at the time, I was already with someone.

19
00:00:47,400 --> 00:00:50,120
Speaker 3: By the way, this comes from user Cavatch Diddy Datch

20
00:00:50,240 --> 00:00:52,040
Speaker 3: and if you want to submit your own stories, go

21
00:00:52,080 --> 00:00:53,840
Speaker 3: to the r slash showcase story Time subrette.

22
00:00:53,920 --> 00:00:56,400
Speaker 2: I'm Dakota, I'm Keon, and we're here to give good advice.

23
00:00:56,560 --> 00:00:57,280
Speaker 2: Goofle leeve.

24
00:00:57,440 --> 00:00:59,560
Speaker 3: We don't have all the answers though, so if you

25
00:00:59,560 --> 00:01:02,000
Speaker 3: would do something different than what we say. Just let

26
00:01:02,040 --> 00:01:04,800
Speaker 3: us know in the comment, and Op says, the first

27
00:01:04,840 --> 00:01:07,759
Speaker 3: impression I got from Jane was she was clingy, annoying,

28
00:01:08,200 --> 00:01:11,080
Speaker 3: and just wouldn't stop bothering me. Unfortunately for me, she

29
00:01:11,160 --> 00:01:13,920
Speaker 3: became part of my larger friend group because she's part

30
00:01:13,920 --> 00:01:17,640
Speaker 3: of Joe's girlfriend's friend group, which that's a mouthful, and

31
00:01:17,800 --> 00:01:20,080
Speaker 3: because me and Joe hang out a lot and I'm

32
00:01:20,080 --> 00:01:22,520
Speaker 3: also friends with his girlfriend, I pretty much run into

33
00:01:22,520 --> 00:01:26,319
Speaker 3: her at minimum twice a month. So first time Jane

34
00:01:26,360 --> 00:01:28,800
Speaker 3: asked me out was a month after that party. I

35
00:01:28,880 --> 00:01:32,480
Speaker 3: informed her I was with someone and not interested. She

36
00:01:32,560 --> 00:01:35,440
Speaker 3: tried again two months later when I broke up with

37
00:01:35,480 --> 00:01:38,640
Speaker 3: my then girlfriend, and again I declined her advances and

38
00:01:38,680 --> 00:01:41,000
Speaker 3: told her I was not interested. I got into a

39
00:01:41,040 --> 00:01:44,280
Speaker 3: new relationship not long after, but unfortunately she and I

40
00:01:44,319 --> 00:01:47,000
Speaker 3: broke up about two months ago. Since then, as you

41
00:01:47,040 --> 00:01:50,440
Speaker 3: may have anticipated, Jane has asked me out again, and

42
00:01:50,480 --> 00:01:52,040
Speaker 3: I said, Noah.

43
00:01:51,760 --> 00:01:53,720
Speaker 4: No, she's going. She's playing the long game.

44
00:01:53,760 --> 00:01:56,200
Speaker 2: I guess she ain't no quitter. And that brings us

45
00:01:56,520 --> 00:01:57,240
Speaker 2: to this week.

46
00:01:57,680 --> 00:02:00,160
Speaker 3: Everything's been opening up here and Joe had been trying

47
00:01:59,960 --> 00:02:01,880
Speaker 3: to fix me up with a friend of his girlfriend

48
00:02:01,920 --> 00:02:03,240
Speaker 3: who would not tell me who.

49
00:02:03,880 --> 00:02:04,760
Speaker 5: He is well.

50
00:02:04,560 --> 00:02:08,000
Speaker 3: Aware of me having rejected Jane multiple times and the

51
00:02:08,040 --> 00:02:09,400
Speaker 3: fact I'm not interested in her.

52
00:02:09,480 --> 00:02:10,840
Speaker 2: He knows this in detail.

53
00:02:10,919 --> 00:02:13,640
Speaker 3: After a lot of what he calls convincing and I

54
00:02:13,760 --> 00:02:17,000
Speaker 3: call whining because I had no interest in dating anytime soon,

55
00:02:17,280 --> 00:02:18,840
Speaker 3: I relented and decided.

56
00:02:18,440 --> 00:02:20,440
Speaker 2: To agree to this double date idea of his.

57
00:02:21,200 --> 00:02:23,440
Speaker 3: We agree on meeting at Joe's apartment in Lo and

58
00:02:23,480 --> 00:02:28,200
Speaker 3: behold Joe, his girlfriend, and Jane are occupying the dinner table.

59
00:02:28,400 --> 00:02:31,280
Speaker 3: Obviously the intention was for my day to be Jane.

60
00:02:31,840 --> 00:02:35,000
Speaker 3: I honestly got so god dang angry and I couldn't

61
00:02:35,080 --> 00:02:36,320
Speaker 3: even get a single word out.

62
00:02:36,639 --> 00:02:38,079
Speaker 2: I just turned around and left.

63
00:02:38,240 --> 00:02:41,200
Speaker 3: I have been bombarded with text and calls about how

64
00:02:41,280 --> 00:02:43,880
Speaker 3: much of a d bag I am and how terribly

65
00:02:44,000 --> 00:02:47,200
Speaker 3: I hurt Jane and so on and so forth. I'm like,

66
00:02:47,280 --> 00:02:51,079
Speaker 3: I literally rejected her three times. I'm not interested in her.

67
00:02:51,080 --> 00:02:54,160
Speaker 3: And you knew that your girlfriend knew that our entire

68
00:02:54,240 --> 00:02:57,480
Speaker 3: friend group has a running joke about how obsessive Jane is,

69
00:02:58,200 --> 00:02:59,840
Speaker 3: so literally everyone knows it.

70
00:03:00,080 --> 00:03:01,119
Speaker 2: So am I the a hole?

71
00:03:01,600 --> 00:03:04,359
Speaker 4: I really hope on the back end, maybe they were

72
00:03:04,639 --> 00:03:07,480
Speaker 4: giving false ideas to Jane too, like yeah, yeah, op,

73
00:03:07,520 --> 00:03:10,000
Speaker 4: he's really interested in you now, like he sees the light.

74
00:03:10,080 --> 00:03:12,240
Speaker 4: If that, like, that's just a sick prank at this point,

75
00:03:12,480 --> 00:03:13,320
Speaker 4: giving her false hope.

76
00:03:13,440 --> 00:03:14,040
Speaker 2: If it was just.

77
00:03:14,040 --> 00:03:16,880
Speaker 4: Jane like oh yeah, no, like bring them like I

78
00:03:17,160 --> 00:03:20,240
Speaker 4: bring them, I would sit down with her and like, listen,

79
00:03:21,120 --> 00:03:23,760
Speaker 4: we're gonna be seeing each other. You have to understand

80
00:03:24,160 --> 00:03:27,960
Speaker 4: I don't like you like that. You're cool, but please

81
00:03:28,200 --> 00:03:32,000
Speaker 4: just understand no means no, and you're pushing your boundaries.

82
00:03:32,000 --> 00:03:34,400
Speaker 4: If you keep pushing, I'm gonna just not hang out

83
00:03:34,440 --> 00:03:35,720
Speaker 4: with you guys, or at least hang out.

84
00:03:35,720 --> 00:03:38,080
Speaker 2: I'm just going to ignore your exist thing.

85
00:03:38,600 --> 00:03:40,200
Speaker 4: You've been nice about it, Dope, I can see why

86
00:03:40,240 --> 00:03:40,960
Speaker 4: you're getting fed up.

87
00:03:40,960 --> 00:03:43,840
Speaker 3: There's some comments here from just let be not the

88
00:03:43,880 --> 00:03:47,160
Speaker 3: A hole, but your friend obviously is setting someone up

89
00:03:47,200 --> 00:03:50,120
Speaker 3: with someone who rejected that person is cruel. Not the

90
00:03:50,160 --> 00:03:52,920
Speaker 3: fact that you turned around, I honestly would have done

91
00:03:52,920 --> 00:03:56,600
Speaker 3: the same, Opie replies, Yeah, I feel pretty crappy about it, though,

92
00:03:56,720 --> 00:03:58,760
Speaker 3: regardless of my opinion on Jane.

93
00:03:58,760 --> 00:03:59,800
Speaker 2: That must have stung.

94
00:04:00,720 --> 00:04:03,640
Speaker 3: Sinjury says, not the aole, You've made your feelings more

95
00:04:03,680 --> 00:04:04,680
Speaker 3: than clear to Jane.

96
00:04:04,800 --> 00:04:05,840
Speaker 2: And your friend as well.

97
00:04:06,120 --> 00:04:08,280
Speaker 3: You had every right to leave, as you had already

98
00:04:08,320 --> 00:04:11,080
Speaker 3: rejected her three times, and still she set herself up

99
00:04:11,120 --> 00:04:12,720
Speaker 3: for rejection number four.

100
00:04:13,240 --> 00:04:16,599
Speaker 2: You're not responsible for her hurt feelings at this point.

101
00:04:16,680 --> 00:04:19,400
Speaker 3: Your friend should have known better than to blindside you

102
00:04:19,480 --> 00:04:21,520
Speaker 3: with a date with someone he knows full well you

103
00:04:21,600 --> 00:04:25,239
Speaker 3: have zero interest in. Though, if I would venture a guess,

104
00:04:25,279 --> 00:04:27,279
Speaker 3: I'd say that the double date was one hundred percent

105
00:04:27,360 --> 00:04:30,599
Speaker 3: Jane's and your friend's girlfriend's idea, and your friend most

106
00:04:30,680 --> 00:04:33,080
Speaker 3: likely just got pressured into convincing you to come.

107
00:04:34,000 --> 00:04:34,760
Speaker 2: Op says.

108
00:04:34,800 --> 00:04:36,640
Speaker 3: Even so, he's one of my best friends and he

109
00:04:36,680 --> 00:04:39,039
Speaker 3: shouldn't be screwing me over like that. Even if it

110
00:04:39,080 --> 00:04:41,600
Speaker 3: was one hundred percent their idea, I still blame.

111
00:04:41,480 --> 00:04:42,159
Speaker 5: Joe the most.

112
00:04:42,480 --> 00:04:46,000
Speaker 3: Jane and Larsen don't mind the y I'm totally on

113
00:04:46,000 --> 00:04:46,599
Speaker 3: your side.

114
00:04:46,680 --> 00:04:49,039
Speaker 2: If they were smart, they wouldn't have set that up.

115
00:04:49,160 --> 00:04:51,400
Speaker 3: It's like they were hungry for controlling someone's life and

116
00:04:51,440 --> 00:04:53,960
Speaker 3: they took your love life as an easy target. Or

117
00:04:54,080 --> 00:04:56,960
Speaker 3: Jane convinced them to do so despite well knowing your

118
00:04:57,000 --> 00:05:00,119
Speaker 3: stance about all this, which definitely says something about how

119
00:05:00,120 --> 00:05:01,360
Speaker 3: she would be in a relationship.

120
00:05:01,440 --> 00:05:04,840
Speaker 2: Oh he replies, God, dang, Jane, leave me alone now.

121
00:05:04,880 --> 00:05:06,120
Speaker 2: I'm just kidding, guy.

122
00:05:06,120 --> 00:05:08,440
Speaker 3: I honestly do not know exactly what went through their

123
00:05:08,440 --> 00:05:10,479
Speaker 3: heads to come to the decision that this was a

124
00:05:10,520 --> 00:05:13,279
Speaker 3: brilliant idea, and I'm not sure whether I'll find out,

125
00:05:13,320 --> 00:05:15,559
Speaker 3: as I'm honestly doubting whether I want to stay friends

126
00:05:15,600 --> 00:05:18,159
Speaker 3: with them after having more of a think and realizing

127
00:05:18,200 --> 00:05:20,480
Speaker 3: that I'm not really the a hole despite the fact

128
00:05:20,480 --> 00:05:23,359
Speaker 3: that I felt guilty. I have seen one common theme

129
00:05:23,400 --> 00:05:25,800
Speaker 3: and a lot of replies, and that is that Jane's

130
00:05:25,839 --> 00:05:29,159
Speaker 3: behavior is obsessive and stalkerish, and honestly it is they

131
00:05:29,279 --> 00:05:32,720
Speaker 3: both knew this too, and decided to set me up

132
00:05:32,760 --> 00:05:35,520
Speaker 3: with her anyway, which honestly leaves room for a slew

133
00:05:35,560 --> 00:05:36,400
Speaker 3: of other issues.

134
00:05:36,560 --> 00:05:39,039
Speaker 2: And there is an update. You know, I think you

135
00:05:39,279 --> 00:05:40,960
Speaker 2: might end up be walking away from this.

136
00:05:41,520 --> 00:05:45,719
Speaker 4: Yeah, it's the you know, you get three strikes, you're out.

137
00:05:45,839 --> 00:05:47,360
Speaker 4: You don't get a fourth strike, you don't get a

138
00:05:47,440 --> 00:05:53,320
Speaker 4: foul ball. It's no means no at this point. You know,

139
00:05:53,839 --> 00:05:55,800
Speaker 4: I get it. Two of the times you got it

140
00:05:55,800 --> 00:05:58,640
Speaker 4: at a relationship or you were in a relationship, So

141
00:05:58,720 --> 00:06:00,120
Speaker 4: I get it. She's like, oh, I might as well

142
00:06:00,760 --> 00:06:04,400
Speaker 4: try and shoot my shot. But girl, you got to

143
00:06:04,400 --> 00:06:05,120
Speaker 4: know when to give up.

144
00:06:05,240 --> 00:06:05,839
Speaker 5: Yeah, you got to.

145
00:06:05,839 --> 00:06:08,560
Speaker 2: Know when to just respect somebody after they tell you no.

146
00:06:08,560 --> 00:06:11,479
Speaker 3: Now it's getting it a point where you know, again

147
00:06:11,480 --> 00:06:12,799
Speaker 3: this is I would blame Joe.

148
00:06:12,720 --> 00:06:15,400
Speaker 4: A little bit goes to Jane as well. To Jane's corner,

149
00:06:15,520 --> 00:06:19,000
Speaker 4: I'm like, you've tried three times, what did What made

150
00:06:19,080 --> 00:06:21,719
Speaker 4: you think this was going to change? Unless if Joe

151
00:06:21,880 --> 00:06:24,680
Speaker 4: was giving you little whispers in your ear saying yeah he's.

152
00:06:24,520 --> 00:06:27,920
Speaker 3: Down, Yeah, yeah, could be. We have an update though

153
00:06:27,960 --> 00:06:31,200
Speaker 3: two months later. At any rate, like I said, here

154
00:06:31,200 --> 00:06:33,600
Speaker 3: it goes. It turns out that some of the more

155
00:06:33,640 --> 00:06:36,560
Speaker 3: pessimistic of you were right. Jane was being obsessive in

156
00:06:36,600 --> 00:06:39,280
Speaker 3: stock Ish and it all sort of came tumbling down

157
00:06:39,279 --> 00:06:41,680
Speaker 3: on her at that point. A week or so after

158
00:06:41,760 --> 00:06:44,240
Speaker 3: I made my post, she decided to message me. Well,

159
00:06:44,320 --> 00:06:46,880
Speaker 3: it came down to her not understanding why I was

160
00:06:46,920 --> 00:06:49,160
Speaker 3: showing interest in her and then refused to date her.

161
00:06:49,720 --> 00:06:53,960
Speaker 3: I never showed interest in her beyond basic friendliness. She

162
00:06:54,040 --> 00:06:56,839
Speaker 3: sent me a wall of text dedicated to trashing my

163
00:06:57,040 --> 00:07:00,480
Speaker 3: previous relationships and calling them all sorts of names, specifically

164
00:07:00,560 --> 00:07:03,479
Speaker 3: pointing out how I dated the wrong girls. It also

165
00:07:03,600 --> 00:07:06,039
Speaker 3: included a weird rant about how everyone agreed that she

166
00:07:06,080 --> 00:07:08,039
Speaker 3: and I were meant to be, which just is not

167
00:07:08,240 --> 00:07:11,800
Speaker 3: the case. Like I said in my previous post, there's

168
00:07:11,800 --> 00:07:15,000
Speaker 3: a running joke in the group about how weird she is. Now,

169
00:07:15,000 --> 00:07:17,400
Speaker 3: you might think this is something that can be expected,

170
00:07:17,440 --> 00:07:20,800
Speaker 3: something that just happens an outlet for her, of sorts,

171
00:07:20,920 --> 00:07:23,040
Speaker 3: except she sent it from the wrong account.

172
00:07:23,920 --> 00:07:25,000
Speaker 2: Huh.

173
00:07:25,320 --> 00:07:25,760
Speaker 5: See.

174
00:07:25,800 --> 00:07:28,040
Speaker 3: I had become Internet friends with a person in the

175
00:07:28,080 --> 00:07:30,679
Speaker 3: past month or two. Me and her would game together,

176
00:07:30,800 --> 00:07:33,400
Speaker 3: chat from time to time, you know, the usual organic

177
00:07:33,520 --> 00:07:37,240
Speaker 3: internet friend situation, and the messages concerning our date were

178
00:07:37,240 --> 00:07:39,960
Speaker 3: sent from this account. It turns out she had literally

179
00:07:40,040 --> 00:07:43,520
Speaker 3: used this alias to infiltrate my Internet friend group and

180
00:07:43,640 --> 00:07:47,440
Speaker 3: keep tabs on me, of sorts. Obviously, this freaked mediaf out.

181
00:07:47,720 --> 00:07:50,040
Speaker 3: I took screenshots of what she had sent me, and

182
00:07:50,120 --> 00:07:53,440
Speaker 3: afterwards blocked all accounts that I now knew she was using.

183
00:07:53,960 --> 00:07:56,280
Speaker 3: I followed that up by sharing everything in our friend

184
00:07:56,320 --> 00:08:01,520
Speaker 3: discord and our friend WhatsApp group so could see. This

185
00:08:01,600 --> 00:08:04,480
Speaker 3: resulted in her being booted from both. I later got

186
00:08:04,480 --> 00:08:08,040
Speaker 3: a call from Joe fully apologetic telling me that he

187
00:08:08,120 --> 00:08:10,520
Speaker 3: had no idea and that he knew he shouldn't have

188
00:08:10,560 --> 00:08:14,520
Speaker 3: done it. His girlfriend was being pressured by Jane. Turns

189
00:08:14,520 --> 00:08:17,680
Speaker 3: out Jane had literally been complaining to her for months

190
00:08:17,720 --> 00:08:20,800
Speaker 3: to arrange something like this, and she finally caved again

191
00:08:21,040 --> 00:08:23,760
Speaker 3: creepy stuff. I told him that I needed some time

192
00:08:24,000 --> 00:08:26,120
Speaker 3: as he really f'd me over big time and I

193
00:08:26,160 --> 00:08:27,720
Speaker 3: didn't trust him anymore as a result.

194
00:08:27,880 --> 00:08:29,680
Speaker 4: I think it's good to get some time away from

195
00:08:29,960 --> 00:08:34,080
Speaker 4: from Joe. Definitely get some time away from Jane, like

196
00:08:34,160 --> 00:08:38,760
Speaker 4: you got us. I think a restraining order at least

197
00:08:38,800 --> 00:08:43,040
Speaker 4: some talks if this is continuing, because this is very

198
00:08:43,320 --> 00:08:43,640
Speaker 4: it is.

199
00:08:43,679 --> 00:08:46,280
Speaker 3: It needs to be like a hard cutoff type situation

200
00:08:46,559 --> 00:08:49,240
Speaker 3: for her. And you know, maybe Joe is kind of

201
00:08:49,240 --> 00:08:51,520
Speaker 3: full of it, being like I didn't know. I'm sorry,

202
00:08:51,840 --> 00:08:54,160
Speaker 3: but it's like you knew, and especially like.

203
00:08:54,200 --> 00:08:56,440
Speaker 4: Everyone talked about in the group that's.

204
00:08:56,240 --> 00:08:59,240
Speaker 3: A lea and you knew, and it was that your

205
00:08:59,240 --> 00:09:01,560
Speaker 3: girlfriend did it and you didn't want to step dad

206
00:09:01,600 --> 00:09:02,280
Speaker 3: and whatever.

207
00:09:02,400 --> 00:09:04,840
Speaker 4: You gave her the light at the end of the

208
00:09:05,080 --> 00:09:07,400
Speaker 4: tunnel for her to be like, oh, hope he does

209
00:09:07,480 --> 00:09:08,559
Speaker 4: want to go on a date with.

210
00:09:08,559 --> 00:09:12,480
Speaker 3: Him, but let's finish this. While Jane has been shunned

211
00:09:12,520 --> 00:09:16,840
Speaker 3: by all friends. She still contacted me twice, once to apologize,

212
00:09:16,880 --> 00:09:20,800
Speaker 3: which quickly turned weird where she started talking about us.

213
00:09:21,280 --> 00:09:24,240
Speaker 3: She seems convinced that there is an US. No I

214
00:09:24,280 --> 00:09:27,839
Speaker 3: am interested. Another time she just contacted me to curse

215
00:09:27,920 --> 00:09:28,880
Speaker 3: me out, both.

216
00:09:28,679 --> 00:09:29,640
Speaker 2: From random account.

217
00:09:29,800 --> 00:09:31,720
Speaker 3: I'm not sure where to go from here, and I

218
00:09:31,760 --> 00:09:34,200
Speaker 3: am still pretty shook up. And we've got some more

219
00:09:34,240 --> 00:09:36,960
Speaker 3: comments here. Snoop chip Monks thirty nine to fifty says,

220
00:09:36,960 --> 00:09:39,360
Speaker 3: I knew it. I told you she'd turn into a stalker,

221
00:09:39,640 --> 00:09:42,079
Speaker 3: using a fake alias and trying to keep tabs on you.

222
00:09:42,240 --> 00:09:45,439
Speaker 3: I am not surprised. So Jane was bothering her friend

223
00:09:45,480 --> 00:09:48,240
Speaker 3: for months. Then she badgered Joe into setting you guys up.

224
00:09:48,280 --> 00:09:51,120
Speaker 3: So your friend Joe caved into his girlfriend like she

225
00:09:51,240 --> 00:09:51,880
Speaker 3: did to Jane.

226
00:09:52,360 --> 00:09:56,080
Speaker 2: Jane is persistent. She wants something, she wants it, and

227
00:09:56,120 --> 00:09:56,800
Speaker 2: she wants you.

228
00:09:57,200 --> 00:09:59,280
Speaker 3: She'll stop it nothing to get it by getting her

229
00:09:59,280 --> 00:10:01,000
Speaker 3: best friend to set that double date up with you.

230
00:10:01,080 --> 00:10:03,319
Speaker 2: It was accomplished. It took months to set up, but

231
00:10:03,360 --> 00:10:05,240
Speaker 2: eventually she got what she wanted. Now.

232
00:10:05,280 --> 00:10:07,760
Speaker 3: As for Joe, at least he apologized to you, But

233
00:10:07,800 --> 00:10:10,360
Speaker 3: it's your choice if you believe him or not, or

234
00:10:10,440 --> 00:10:13,199
Speaker 3: if you accept it. At least he acknowledges that he

235
00:10:13,280 --> 00:10:15,880
Speaker 3: screwed up. But I don't blame you for not trusting him.

236
00:10:16,160 --> 00:10:17,680
Speaker 3: It will take him a long time.

237
00:10:17,520 --> 00:10:18,520
Speaker 2: To gain your trust back.

238
00:10:18,720 --> 00:10:20,880
Speaker 3: As long as he's with his girlfriend. I wouldn't trust

239
00:10:20,880 --> 00:10:23,760
Speaker 3: her either. Now she calls and apologizes to you, I

240
00:10:23,800 --> 00:10:25,760
Speaker 3: don't know how to handle that one, but I'll be

241
00:10:25,840 --> 00:10:26,920
Speaker 3: surprised if she did.

242
00:10:27,400 --> 00:10:29,920
Speaker 2: Yeah, the girl lives in a fantasy world. Just be careful.

243
00:10:30,000 --> 00:10:30,920
Speaker 2: Cut all contact.

244
00:10:31,040 --> 00:10:33,160
Speaker 3: If she keeps getting creepy and stockrish depending on where

245
00:10:33,200 --> 00:10:35,160
Speaker 3: you live, tell her you'll get a protective order or

246
00:10:35,240 --> 00:10:37,840
Speaker 3: restraining order against her and that you will involve the cops.

247
00:10:37,880 --> 00:10:41,040
Speaker 2: Yep, be safe, watch your back, oh P replies.

248
00:10:41,559 --> 00:10:44,840
Speaker 3: They both apologized like a full on, long but apology

249
00:10:44,960 --> 00:10:48,520
Speaker 3: via email, but I'm keeping my distance from them, low contact.

250
00:10:48,760 --> 00:10:50,720
Speaker 3: I don't think I want friends that f me over

251
00:10:50,800 --> 00:10:52,719
Speaker 3: like that. As for the restraining order, I think it's

252
00:10:52,720 --> 00:10:54,199
Speaker 3: pretty difficult to get one here.

253
00:10:54,760 --> 00:10:56,400
Speaker 2: And that is the end of that story.

254
00:10:57,080 --> 00:11:00,320
Speaker 4: My late neighbor left me everything, and now I'm accused

255
00:11:00,360 --> 00:11:01,240
Speaker 4: of taking advantage.

256
00:11:01,280 --> 00:11:03,520
Speaker 2: Sounds like you got some jealous neighbors.

257
00:11:03,679 --> 00:11:06,960
Speaker 4: I Female thirty two recently came into an inheritance when

258
00:11:07,000 --> 00:11:10,880
Speaker 4: my neighbor and close friend, Valerie female sixty eight, passed away.

259
00:11:10,960 --> 00:11:13,600
Speaker 4: Oh no. I met Valerie when I moved into my

260
00:11:13,679 --> 00:11:17,040
Speaker 4: condo in twenty eighteen, and she became my next door neighbor.

261
00:11:17,640 --> 00:11:20,280
Speaker 4: Our places are on the top floor and of almost

262
00:11:20,320 --> 00:11:22,880
Speaker 4: connecting balconies. And by the way, this comes from user

263
00:11:22,960 --> 00:11:25,440
Speaker 4: character Quality fifty four, twenty nine. And if you want

264
00:11:25,480 --> 00:11:27,480
Speaker 4: submit your own stories, go to the r slash Okay

265
00:11:27,480 --> 00:11:30,760
Speaker 4: Storytime suber at It. I'm Keon, I'm Dakota, and we're

266
00:11:30,760 --> 00:11:32,640
Speaker 4: here to give good advice googly, but we don't have

267
00:11:32,679 --> 00:11:35,200
Speaker 4: all the answers. Unfortunately, we only know what we do.

268
00:11:35,280 --> 00:11:37,280
Speaker 4: So let us know what you would do in the comments.

269
00:11:37,440 --> 00:11:40,160
Speaker 4: Pretty pretty please, oh, he says. We used to spend

270
00:11:40,200 --> 00:11:43,240
Speaker 4: every Saturday morning outside taking care of our plant babies

271
00:11:43,280 --> 00:11:46,200
Speaker 4: and chatting. I had learned that Valerie had been a

272
00:11:46,200 --> 00:11:49,240
Speaker 4: widow since she was fifty five. I got the impression

273
00:11:49,280 --> 00:11:51,680
Speaker 4: that she had married young and never had a true

274
00:11:51,760 --> 00:11:54,320
Speaker 4: chance to learn who she was until after Gary had

275
00:11:54,360 --> 00:11:57,280
Speaker 4: passed away. I had always thought that Valerie was alone

276
00:11:57,280 --> 00:11:59,840
Speaker 4: in the world. It turns out that Valerie had had

277
00:12:00,120 --> 00:12:05,800
Speaker 4: one child, a daughter, Sam female forty four, However, they

278
00:12:05,800 --> 00:12:08,840
Speaker 4: had been estranged since their early two thousands. The story

279
00:12:08,880 --> 00:12:10,880
Speaker 4: that Valui told me was that Sam had come out

280
00:12:10,920 --> 00:12:14,080
Speaker 4: as a lover of woman her own gender when she

281
00:12:14,240 --> 00:12:16,280
Speaker 4: was just out of high school. That did not sit

282
00:12:16,360 --> 00:12:19,080
Speaker 4: well with Gary. He told Sam that she was no

283
00:12:19,160 --> 00:12:22,200
Speaker 4: longer his daughter and punted her out, telling her to

284
00:12:22,280 --> 00:12:25,720
Speaker 4: never contact them or come home again. The whole situation

285
00:12:25,840 --> 00:12:29,160
Speaker 4: broke Valerie's heart, and it was her biggest regret in life.

286
00:12:30,320 --> 00:12:32,480
Speaker 4: She told me that she had always wished she had

287
00:12:32,520 --> 00:12:35,120
Speaker 4: tried to fight for Sam, but in the moment, she

288
00:12:35,240 --> 00:12:37,800
Speaker 4: was so shocked that she watched the whole thing happen

289
00:12:38,000 --> 00:12:41,520
Speaker 4: without saying a word. When I had first heard that story,

290
00:12:41,760 --> 00:12:43,520
Speaker 4: I asked if she had ever tried to reach out.

291
00:12:44,200 --> 00:12:46,840
Speaker 4: Valerie told me that she hadn't because she didn't know

292
00:12:46,840 --> 00:12:49,840
Speaker 4: how to even try. So I did some internet sleuthing

293
00:12:50,000 --> 00:12:52,720
Speaker 4: and found Sam on Facebook. It turns out that Sam

294
00:12:52,760 --> 00:12:55,840
Speaker 4: had managed to build a good life for herself. I

295
00:12:55,960 --> 00:13:00,800
Speaker 4: helped Valerie draft a heartfelt message to Sam. I reapologized

296
00:13:00,800 --> 00:13:03,719
Speaker 4: for everything and told Sam how much her perspectives had

297
00:13:03,800 --> 00:13:07,160
Speaker 4: changed over the years. Valerie also asked if they could

298
00:13:07,200 --> 00:13:10,640
Speaker 4: try and build a new relationship. We sent the message

299
00:13:10,679 --> 00:13:13,520
Speaker 4: and saw that Sam had seen and maybe read the message,

300
00:13:14,080 --> 00:13:18,280
Speaker 4: but Sam never responded. About a month ago, I got

301
00:13:18,280 --> 00:13:20,800
Speaker 4: home from work to find Valerie passed away on her balcony.

302
00:13:21,080 --> 00:13:23,679
Speaker 4: I sent the link to her obituary and memorial page

303
00:13:23,720 --> 00:13:27,800
Speaker 4: to Sam. I didn't see Sam at the funeral. There

304
00:13:27,840 --> 00:13:31,120
Speaker 4: is a lawyer handling all of Valerie's affairs. I thought

305
00:13:31,160 --> 00:13:33,440
Speaker 4: I would simply grieve the loss of my friend and

306
00:13:33,480 --> 00:13:36,800
Speaker 4: eventually would have a new neighbor. I never expected to

307
00:13:36,840 --> 00:13:40,559
Speaker 4: be the only person that Valerie mentioned in her will,

308
00:13:41,120 --> 00:13:44,080
Speaker 4: let alone, you have been left everything. A few days ago,

309
00:13:44,440 --> 00:13:48,560
Speaker 4: ding ding ding, Sam messaged me. She was upset and

310
00:13:48,559 --> 00:13:51,319
Speaker 4: demanded that I give her valeries things, claiming that I

311
00:13:51,360 --> 00:13:54,360
Speaker 4: took advantage of an old widow. I was upset when

312
00:13:54,360 --> 00:13:57,600
Speaker 4: I first read Sam's messages and thought, who does she

313
00:13:57,720 --> 00:14:00,840
Speaker 4: think she is. She hasn't spoken to val in literal

314
00:14:01,000 --> 00:14:04,320
Speaker 4: decades and never responded when Valerie tried to reach out.

315
00:14:04,600 --> 00:14:07,400
Speaker 4: Now Valerie is her mother, and that entitles her to

316
00:14:07,520 --> 00:14:11,520
Speaker 4: Valerie's stuff. Now I wonder if I should do something

317
00:14:11,520 --> 00:14:14,720
Speaker 4: for Sam. I go back and forth on whether Valerie

318
00:14:14,760 --> 00:14:17,360
Speaker 4: would want me to. Valerie knew where Sam was, so

319
00:14:17,440 --> 00:14:21,000
Speaker 4: she could have included Sam somehow. The lawyer I talked

320
00:14:21,000 --> 00:14:23,960
Speaker 4: to said that the inheritance is completely mine and that

321
00:14:24,200 --> 00:14:28,680
Speaker 4: Sam has no claim. Here's the question, should I give

322
00:14:28,720 --> 00:14:30,560
Speaker 4: Sam something? And we have some comments, what do you think?

323
00:14:30,600 --> 00:14:33,840
Speaker 3: To Kiota, I think, honestly, you can make that determination

324
00:14:33,960 --> 00:14:36,680
Speaker 3: without even wondering, like what would Valerie want?

325
00:14:36,800 --> 00:14:37,080
Speaker 2: Or do?

326
00:14:37,720 --> 00:14:38,040
Speaker 5: I think?

327
00:14:38,120 --> 00:14:40,920
Speaker 3: Now you know she is gone, She's given you all

328
00:14:40,960 --> 00:14:44,200
Speaker 3: of her things, and now it's up to you to decide.

329
00:14:44,240 --> 00:14:47,640
Speaker 2: Hey, you know, what do I feel like is right?

330
00:14:48,360 --> 00:14:50,640
Speaker 3: And I think if she does come to you and

331
00:14:50,840 --> 00:14:54,600
Speaker 3: is like immediately like you took advantage of an old widow,

332
00:14:54,680 --> 00:14:57,960
Speaker 3: it's like, no, actually, I was your mother's only comfort

333
00:14:58,000 --> 00:14:59,000
Speaker 3: in her final years.

334
00:14:59,160 --> 00:15:01,240
Speaker 4: And again it's not like you can do that aggressively

335
00:15:01,320 --> 00:15:05,440
Speaker 4: because you could also understand for Sam, she's like I

336
00:15:05,480 --> 00:15:07,880
Speaker 4: lost a mother, I lost my family. I was I

337
00:15:07,920 --> 00:15:08,720
Speaker 4: didn't have a choice.

338
00:15:08,760 --> 00:15:10,800
Speaker 3: And then after having been reached out to, I'm sure

339
00:15:10,840 --> 00:15:13,040
Speaker 3: she's very confused. I think you could probably give it

340
00:15:13,080 --> 00:15:14,960
Speaker 3: some time to cool off. You know, I don't know

341
00:15:15,000 --> 00:15:18,320
Speaker 3: what kind of you know, assets or you've you've been left.

342
00:15:18,000 --> 00:15:20,080
Speaker 4: But depends on how Sam goes about this. I know

343
00:15:20,200 --> 00:15:22,360
Speaker 4: it's like, hey, who are you? And it's also like

344
00:15:22,480 --> 00:15:24,280
Speaker 4: it's both of you pointing at the finger out each other,

345
00:15:24,320 --> 00:15:24,840
Speaker 4: like who are you?

346
00:15:24,880 --> 00:15:26,720
Speaker 3: And it's like you don't know who I am because

347
00:15:26,760 --> 00:15:28,680
Speaker 3: you you know, for good reason.

348
00:15:28,800 --> 00:15:31,280
Speaker 2: It's like you were ostracized from your family and it's

349
00:15:31,280 --> 00:15:31,800
Speaker 2: a big deal.

350
00:15:32,000 --> 00:15:35,120
Speaker 4: It's nobody knows this situation because it's really tough, especially

351
00:15:35,120 --> 00:15:35,320
Speaker 4: for you.

352
00:15:35,440 --> 00:15:35,600
Speaker 5: Peter.

353
00:15:35,640 --> 00:15:37,120
Speaker 4: You're like, I was just helping a friend. I wasn't

354
00:15:37,120 --> 00:15:38,280
Speaker 4: expecting any of it exactly.

355
00:15:38,360 --> 00:15:41,320
Speaker 3: To immediately come sideways and say you were taking advantage

356
00:15:41,320 --> 00:15:43,920
Speaker 3: of her, and it's like, no, I was, I was

357
00:15:43,960 --> 00:15:45,160
Speaker 3: this thing called her friend.

358
00:15:45,400 --> 00:15:48,600
Speaker 2: Actually it's it's kind of really all up to your

359
00:15:48,640 --> 00:15:49,720
Speaker 2: own determination now.

360
00:15:49,840 --> 00:15:51,600
Speaker 4: But we have some comments. Let's go ahead and get

361
00:15:51,640 --> 00:15:55,000
Speaker 4: into those coming. Number one, there's always three sides to

362
00:15:55,040 --> 00:15:59,000
Speaker 4: every story, side A, side B and the truth in

363
00:15:59,040 --> 00:16:01,320
Speaker 4: the middle. I don't know what happened between the two

364
00:16:01,360 --> 00:16:04,360
Speaker 4: of them, not really, so I'd be very careful of

365
00:16:04,440 --> 00:16:08,720
Speaker 4: vilifying anyone reply I like this idea. In addition, I

366
00:16:08,720 --> 00:16:11,920
Speaker 4: would not engage directly with Sam. Let the lawyer handle

367
00:16:11,960 --> 00:16:12,880
Speaker 4: all communications.

368
00:16:12,920 --> 00:16:14,720
Speaker 2: Really feel like she was vilifying.

369
00:16:14,800 --> 00:16:16,880
Speaker 3: I think it was more of a reaction to being

370
00:16:16,960 --> 00:16:21,440
Speaker 3: like vilified herself by being approached in like a yeah,

371
00:16:21,600 --> 00:16:26,280
Speaker 3: no you you took advantage of my widowed mother.

372
00:16:26,640 --> 00:16:28,480
Speaker 4: But we have an update. Thank you to everyone who

373
00:16:28,480 --> 00:16:31,400
Speaker 4: has commented and given me the outside perspective that I needed.

374
00:16:32,040 --> 00:16:34,840
Speaker 4: I'm shocked at the volume of people who have reacted

375
00:16:34,880 --> 00:16:36,680
Speaker 4: to this. I was really only hoping to have a

376
00:16:36,680 --> 00:16:39,480
Speaker 4: handful of responses to help me think. I do want

377
00:16:39,520 --> 00:16:41,560
Speaker 4: to clarify some things that I wasn't able to in

378
00:16:41,600 --> 00:16:45,360
Speaker 4: the original post due to the character limits. I want

379
00:16:45,400 --> 00:16:50,040
Speaker 4: to address the timeline of events. Here we go one.

380
00:16:50,320 --> 00:16:52,560
Speaker 4: Sam was kicked out in the early two thousands. I

381
00:16:52,640 --> 00:16:55,800
Speaker 4: think it was in two thousand and two. Gary passed

382
00:16:55,800 --> 00:17:00,280
Speaker 4: away in twenty eleven. Valerie sold the family home and

383
00:17:00,360 --> 00:17:03,160
Speaker 4: downside to her condo in twenty thirteen because the house

384
00:17:03,240 --> 00:17:05,439
Speaker 4: was just too big for I moved into my condo.

385
00:17:05,760 --> 00:17:09,520
Speaker 4: In twenty eighteen. I learned about Sam and Valerie wrote

386
00:17:09,520 --> 00:17:11,639
Speaker 4: the letter and we sent it to Sam. In twenty

387
00:17:11,680 --> 00:17:15,000
Speaker 4: twenty two, Valerie retired and had her will in a

388
00:17:15,040 --> 00:17:16,960
Speaker 4: state set up. At the end of twenty twenty three.

389
00:17:17,480 --> 00:17:20,720
Speaker 4: Valerie passed away on January twenty third of twenty twenty five.

390
00:17:21,520 --> 00:17:24,760
Speaker 4: The funeral was on January thirty first, twenty twenty five.

391
00:17:25,320 --> 00:17:28,240
Speaker 4: I messaged Sam as soon as the funeral arrangements were finalized.

392
00:17:28,960 --> 00:17:33,399
Speaker 4: Sam messaged me this past Sunday on February twenty third,

393
00:17:34,040 --> 00:17:37,840
Speaker 4: twenty twenty five, to clarify some questions that people had

394
00:17:37,880 --> 00:17:41,560
Speaker 4: about the estate. It's currently in the formal probate process.

395
00:17:42,080 --> 00:17:44,760
Speaker 4: Valerie was a legal secretary for a family law office,

396
00:17:44,920 --> 00:17:47,320
Speaker 4: and the lawyer she worked with specialized in the state law.

397
00:17:47,920 --> 00:17:49,840
Speaker 4: She had a full career there, and as part of

398
00:17:49,840 --> 00:17:52,560
Speaker 4: her retirement package, that lawyer helped her set up her

399
00:17:52,600 --> 00:17:56,119
Speaker 4: will and take care of the estate. This is the

400
00:17:56,160 --> 00:17:58,200
Speaker 4: lawyer who told me that everything is being done by

401
00:17:58,200 --> 00:18:01,240
Speaker 4: the book, that everything will be settled in a few months,

402
00:18:01,280 --> 00:18:04,200
Speaker 4: and that all of Valerie's wishes are being carried out

403
00:18:04,480 --> 00:18:08,040
Speaker 4: to the letter. I have taken Reddit's advice and will

404
00:18:08,040 --> 00:18:10,320
Speaker 4: be speaking to a different lawyer about both my legal

405
00:18:10,320 --> 00:18:12,959
Speaker 4: interests in the estate and how to communicate with Sam.

406
00:18:13,040 --> 00:18:15,760
Speaker 4: I still haven't responded to her because I haven't been

407
00:18:15,800 --> 00:18:20,399
Speaker 4: sure how her initial messages was and were extremely harsh

408
00:18:20,400 --> 00:18:23,199
Speaker 4: and attacking, and that's what triggered that first emotional and

409
00:18:23,240 --> 00:18:26,080
Speaker 4: protective response in me. I'm trying to take Reddit's advice

410
00:18:26,119 --> 00:18:29,840
Speaker 4: and be empathetic to Sam's situation. However, that is challenging

411
00:18:29,840 --> 00:18:31,920
Speaker 4: because Sam has continued to send me a few additional

412
00:18:31,920 --> 00:18:35,240
Speaker 4: messages demanding that I respond, that I respond, and calling

413
00:18:35,240 --> 00:18:39,880
Speaker 4: me a heartless witch and a LGBTQ, a plus bigot,

414
00:18:39,920 --> 00:18:42,840
Speaker 4: among other things. I'm not going to respond until after

415
00:18:42,880 --> 00:18:45,000
Speaker 4: I've talked to that lawyer and could do it in

416
00:18:45,040 --> 00:18:48,200
Speaker 4: the right way. I do think that Reddit is right

417
00:18:48,240 --> 00:18:51,080
Speaker 4: and that if Sam wants any sentimental items, she should

418
00:18:51,119 --> 00:18:54,960
Speaker 4: have them because they might help her with their healing process.

419
00:18:55,400 --> 00:18:57,480
Speaker 4: I do want to be clear that the estate is

420
00:18:57,520 --> 00:19:01,040
Speaker 4: not very big and it is very simple. All that

421
00:19:01,160 --> 00:19:04,119
Speaker 4: Valerie had was her condo and her car. That car

422
00:19:04,200 --> 00:19:06,719
Speaker 4: was more valuable to her than it is on the market.

423
00:19:06,880 --> 00:19:09,840
Speaker 4: It's a twenty fourteen model of a daily driver. I

424
00:19:09,880 --> 00:19:12,040
Speaker 4: held the spare keet of Valerie's condo and have been

425
00:19:12,080 --> 00:19:13,720
Speaker 4: in to clear out the kitchen and take care of

426
00:19:13,800 --> 00:19:16,000
Speaker 4: her plant babies because I can't bear to see them

427
00:19:16,000 --> 00:19:18,480
Speaker 4: pass away too. It's been really strange being in that

428
00:19:18,560 --> 00:19:22,400
Speaker 4: space without her. I have been given permission to start

429
00:19:22,400 --> 00:19:24,719
Speaker 4: cleaning out the condo, but not to get rid of anything.

430
00:19:25,280 --> 00:19:27,359
Speaker 4: I'm going to spend this weekend going through her things

431
00:19:27,520 --> 00:19:30,720
Speaker 4: and organizing them into boxes. I don't know what type

432
00:19:30,720 --> 00:19:33,320
Speaker 4: of sentimental items I'll find because Valerie didn't have any

433
00:19:33,359 --> 00:19:37,119
Speaker 4: family photos on display in her place. Ooh, there are

434
00:19:37,160 --> 00:19:40,240
Speaker 4: no photos of Sam and no photos of Gary, not

435
00:19:40,280 --> 00:19:42,600
Speaker 4: even wedding photos. I can't speak to the Valerie who

436
00:19:42,680 --> 00:19:46,320
Speaker 4: Sam knew. I do know that in her younger years,

437
00:19:46,600 --> 00:19:49,720
Speaker 4: Valerie was an active member of the LDS Church. She

438
00:19:50,520 --> 00:19:52,920
Speaker 4: had stopped being religious by the time that I knew her.

439
00:19:53,640 --> 00:19:56,440
Speaker 4: The Valerie who I knew was, by no means a bigot.

440
00:19:56,840 --> 00:19:59,439
Speaker 4: I knew her as a kind, loving and accepting person.

441
00:20:00,200 --> 00:20:02,720
Speaker 4: She knew that I was by and never judge me,

442
00:20:02,760 --> 00:20:05,000
Speaker 4: and never judge me for it. She had a Pride

443
00:20:05,040 --> 00:20:07,520
Speaker 4: flag hanging on her balcony and used to attend bride

444
00:20:07,560 --> 00:20:10,679
Speaker 4: parades as one of those ally moms or grandma's who

445
00:20:10,720 --> 00:20:14,440
Speaker 4: would hug and be supportive of the LGBTQ plus youth

446
00:20:14,960 --> 00:20:17,600
Speaker 4: who had no one I knew as someone who's trying

447
00:20:17,600 --> 00:20:20,040
Speaker 4: to make amends in the universe. When I first heard

448
00:20:20,040 --> 00:20:22,520
Speaker 4: the story about Sam, I was shocked because that just

449
00:20:22,520 --> 00:20:26,200
Speaker 4: didn't line up with the Valerie I knew. Valerie did

450
00:20:26,200 --> 00:20:28,280
Speaker 4: have her own Facebook account and knew how to use it,

451
00:20:28,680 --> 00:20:31,239
Speaker 4: but Sam was not easy to find. It took me

452
00:20:31,280 --> 00:20:33,959
Speaker 4: a few months to track her down. We used Facebook

453
00:20:34,000 --> 00:20:37,080
Speaker 4: Messenger because that was our only means of contacting Sam.

454
00:20:37,960 --> 00:20:40,000
Speaker 4: The message was a four to five page letter where

455
00:20:40,080 --> 00:20:44,400
Speaker 4: Valerie told Sam everything and completely shared her soul. Valerie

456
00:20:44,400 --> 00:20:47,280
Speaker 4: only reached out once because Sam was so much like

457
00:20:47,280 --> 00:20:49,560
Speaker 4: her father and I don't want to push her or

458
00:20:49,640 --> 00:20:52,720
Speaker 4: hurt her further by pestering. I've told her everything I

459
00:20:52,720 --> 00:20:56,000
Speaker 4: can until she responds. The only direct communication that I've

460
00:20:56,040 --> 00:20:58,639
Speaker 4: had with Sam was the Facebook messages I sent her

461
00:20:58,680 --> 00:21:03,160
Speaker 4: about Valerie's passing. I think that covered everyone's questions. Thank

462
00:21:03,200 --> 00:21:06,560
Speaker 4: you all for providing me with new perspectives. It's been helpful.

463
00:21:07,200 --> 00:21:09,240
Speaker 4: There's been interest in all of this, So if people

464
00:21:09,280 --> 00:21:12,640
Speaker 4: want any further updates after probate, I'll try and provide them,

465
00:21:12,640 --> 00:21:14,600
Speaker 4: and we do have a second update to code.

466
00:21:14,680 --> 00:21:16,639
Speaker 2: Oh boy, oh boy.

467
00:21:16,760 --> 00:21:18,160
Speaker 4: I mean that does clear a lot of things up.

468
00:21:18,200 --> 00:21:20,800
Speaker 4: The fact that Sam was like, oh you're you're you're

469
00:21:20,840 --> 00:21:25,320
Speaker 4: just a bigot, and Hope He's like bye, Like you.

470
00:21:25,320 --> 00:21:27,119
Speaker 2: Literally can't even play that card.

471
00:21:27,840 --> 00:21:31,600
Speaker 4: It's also here's the thing, it's we don't know Valerie's past.

472
00:21:31,600 --> 00:21:34,479
Speaker 4: The only one who knows Valerie's past really is Sam,

473
00:21:34,840 --> 00:21:36,600
Speaker 4: and I know she was trying to make up for

474
00:21:36,640 --> 00:21:39,280
Speaker 4: it in the world, But I feel like Valerie should

475
00:21:39,280 --> 00:21:41,000
Speaker 4: have messaged Sam sooner.

476
00:21:41,119 --> 00:21:43,159
Speaker 2: Yeah, of course, but again it's complicated.

477
00:21:43,200 --> 00:21:44,880
Speaker 3: I feel like you failed, and it's like I don't

478
00:21:44,920 --> 00:21:46,600
Speaker 3: know how, I don't know if I should. I don't

479
00:21:46,600 --> 00:21:48,720
Speaker 3: know if it you know, And maybe she's like, I'm

480
00:21:48,760 --> 00:21:51,119
Speaker 3: afraid that if I do messagers, she's gonna send me

481
00:21:51,119 --> 00:21:53,119
Speaker 3: a message back being like, no, I do hate you

482
00:21:53,160 --> 00:21:55,280
Speaker 3: and I'll hate you forever and I want nothing to

483
00:21:55,280 --> 00:21:57,679
Speaker 3: do with you. It's like that's almost that's seeing that

484
00:21:57,760 --> 00:21:59,400
Speaker 3: has got to be worse than the unknown.

485
00:21:59,480 --> 00:22:01,439
Speaker 4: I don't know. I feel like closure is better than

486
00:22:01,520 --> 00:22:03,320
Speaker 4: playing the what if, what if? What if?

487
00:22:03,359 --> 00:22:03,760
Speaker 5: What if?

488
00:22:03,920 --> 00:22:05,639
Speaker 4: Like this is gonna be on my chip on my

489
00:22:05,680 --> 00:22:06,359
Speaker 4: shoulder kind of thing.

490
00:22:06,840 --> 00:22:09,159
Speaker 3: Being a parent's got to be crazy and having feeling

491
00:22:09,200 --> 00:22:11,959
Speaker 3: responsible for that having happened and not standing up for her,

492
00:22:12,000 --> 00:22:14,320
Speaker 3: it's got to be a wild cocktail of emotion.

493
00:22:14,440 --> 00:22:17,040
Speaker 4: And again I don't blame Sam on not responding to

494
00:22:17,080 --> 00:22:17,720
Speaker 4: those messages.

495
00:22:18,000 --> 00:22:21,879
Speaker 3: It does just it just feels very hollow to now

496
00:22:22,080 --> 00:22:27,080
Speaker 3: becoming so aggressively for like, you know, whatever assets her

497
00:22:27,119 --> 00:22:28,440
Speaker 3: mother had, where it's like.

498
00:22:28,440 --> 00:22:30,159
Speaker 2: To the point where she's like, you're a bigot, and

499
00:22:30,200 --> 00:22:31,200
Speaker 2: it's like, dude.

500
00:22:31,000 --> 00:22:32,800
Speaker 4: It's a thing of you don't even know me.

501
00:22:32,960 --> 00:22:33,680
Speaker 2: I don't know you.

502
00:22:33,800 --> 00:22:37,320
Speaker 4: Let's start off with a simple hello, like I knew

503
00:22:37,320 --> 00:22:39,119
Speaker 4: your mom. Is this I guess you, Like, let's have

504
00:22:39,160 --> 00:22:40,080
Speaker 4: a talk over this.

505
00:22:40,240 --> 00:22:43,199
Speaker 3: A perfect example of just like if you just comment

506
00:22:43,560 --> 00:22:48,240
Speaker 3: something with a different attitude, like, the outcome could be

507
00:22:48,400 --> 00:22:49,199
Speaker 3: entirely different.

508
00:22:49,280 --> 00:22:51,480
Speaker 4: But we have a second update, let's see what dope,

509
00:22:51,480 --> 00:22:53,439
Speaker 4: he says. I met with a lawyer last week and

510
00:22:53,520 --> 00:22:56,879
Speaker 4: learned some new things. Firstly, that lawyer is going to

511
00:22:56,920 --> 00:22:59,560
Speaker 4: reach out to Sam to ask her to stop contacting

512
00:22:59,560 --> 00:23:02,800
Speaker 4: me directly and to only communicate via him or the

513
00:23:02,960 --> 00:23:05,840
Speaker 4: probate process. He's also going to ask her what she

514
00:23:05,960 --> 00:23:09,040
Speaker 4: wants both from Valerie and what her goal was from

515
00:23:09,080 --> 00:23:13,159
Speaker 4: contacting me directly. Was This lawyer also explained the formal

516
00:23:13,359 --> 00:23:16,639
Speaker 4: probate process from my area for me, legal next of

517
00:23:16,720 --> 00:23:19,560
Speaker 4: kin only have during the formal probate process to file

518
00:23:19,600 --> 00:23:23,280
Speaker 4: a contest against a will. Once the process is finished,

519
00:23:23,320 --> 00:23:26,200
Speaker 4: there is no legal way to contest the will. One

520
00:23:26,200 --> 00:23:28,520
Speaker 4: of the steps of this process is also to legally

521
00:23:28,560 --> 00:23:32,080
Speaker 4: slash officially notify all next of kin and debtors of

522
00:23:32,160 --> 00:23:35,160
Speaker 4: the passing and that the state is in the formal process.

523
00:23:36,040 --> 00:23:39,560
Speaker 4: So Sam was notified by the probate attorneys right around

524
00:23:39,600 --> 00:23:42,640
Speaker 4: the time that she sent me the first message on Facebook.

525
00:23:43,040 --> 00:23:46,080
Speaker 4: What's strange is that the probate documentation shows that Sam

526
00:23:46,160 --> 00:23:49,359
Speaker 4: said she doesn't want anything from Valerie. There is a

527
00:23:49,359 --> 00:23:50,240
Speaker 4: little bit left here.

528
00:23:50,640 --> 00:23:52,520
Speaker 2: Let's me get into it, because that was a cliffhanger.

529
00:23:52,880 --> 00:23:55,520
Speaker 4: Was also finishing up the story. My lawyer also told

530
00:23:55,560 --> 00:23:57,960
Speaker 4: me that the way Valerie's will was written, it would

531
00:23:57,960 --> 00:23:59,879
Speaker 4: have been challenging for Sam to contest it during the

532
00:24:00,119 --> 00:24:03,800
Speaker 4: formal probate process. He also said that it was extremely

533
00:24:03,920 --> 00:24:07,760
Speaker 4: rare for judges to rule against the deceased wishes, especially

534
00:24:07,760 --> 00:24:09,640
Speaker 4: when it was easy to prove that those wishes were

535
00:24:09,640 --> 00:24:13,840
Speaker 4: made when the person was a full sound mind and body.

536
00:24:14,600 --> 00:24:17,040
Speaker 4: He also added that Sam telling probate that she didn't

537
00:24:17,040 --> 00:24:20,800
Speaker 4: want anything from Valerie and her intimidation style to contacting

538
00:24:20,800 --> 00:24:23,800
Speaker 4: me would all add additional layers of challenge if she

539
00:24:23,840 --> 00:24:26,800
Speaker 4: does not change her mind and files a contest in court.

540
00:24:27,280 --> 00:24:30,520
Speaker 4: So now I'm waiting to hear back from Sam. I'm

541
00:24:30,560 --> 00:24:32,919
Speaker 4: now very curious as to why she would tell the

542
00:24:32,960 --> 00:24:35,919
Speaker 4: probate attorneys that she didn't want anything, but would then

543
00:24:35,920 --> 00:24:38,439
Speaker 4: turn around and contact me the way she did. And

544
00:24:38,480 --> 00:24:39,639
Speaker 4: that is the end of the story.

545
00:24:40,000 --> 00:24:43,160
Speaker 2: My best friend turned my life into her drama. So

546
00:24:43,240 --> 00:24:45,160
Speaker 2: I finally cut her off, cut her out.

547
00:24:45,280 --> 00:24:49,040
Speaker 3: I had this friend since elementary school, Karen, because you know,

548
00:24:49,320 --> 00:24:51,399
Speaker 3: it was a good friendship and I liked her, she

549
00:24:51,600 --> 00:24:54,080
Speaker 3: liked me. We had a solid bond. I told her

550
00:24:54,119 --> 00:24:56,880
Speaker 3: everything about me and everything that happened throughout my day

551
00:24:56,960 --> 00:24:58,639
Speaker 3: or week, and she did the same.

552
00:24:59,040 --> 00:25:02,000
Speaker 2: But the thing was she was a bit controlling from

553
00:25:02,000 --> 00:25:02,440
Speaker 2: the start.

554
00:25:02,680 --> 00:25:04,959
Speaker 3: She always had to be in the spotlight, even in

555
00:25:05,040 --> 00:25:07,479
Speaker 3: the friend group. By the way, this comes from us

556
00:25:07,480 --> 00:25:10,639
Speaker 3: your Fickle Balance in ninety nine three, direct from the

557
00:25:10,760 --> 00:25:13,040
Speaker 3: r slash Okay Storytime celebread it and if you want

558
00:25:13,080 --> 00:25:14,760
Speaker 3: to submit your own story, submit them there.

559
00:25:15,200 --> 00:25:17,320
Speaker 2: My name's Dakota, my name's Keon, and.

560
00:25:17,280 --> 00:25:19,600
Speaker 3: We are here to give you good advice goofily, But

561
00:25:19,640 --> 00:25:21,080
Speaker 3: we don't have all the answers. We only know what

562
00:25:21,119 --> 00:25:22,960
Speaker 3: we'd do, So if you would do something different, let

563
00:25:23,040 --> 00:25:25,560
Speaker 3: us know in the comments. A little backstory here back

564
00:25:25,560 --> 00:25:27,399
Speaker 3: in the day. We had a big friend group that

565
00:25:27,440 --> 00:25:30,520
Speaker 3: eventually became a trio. The fallouts with the rest of

566
00:25:30,560 --> 00:25:33,960
Speaker 3: the girls were understandable. It wasn't just her fault, but

567
00:25:34,119 --> 00:25:36,159
Speaker 3: every time she had a problem with someone, all of

568
00:25:36,240 --> 00:25:38,880
Speaker 3: us were expected to take her side without even considering

569
00:25:38,880 --> 00:25:42,080
Speaker 3: the other perspective, because, as I said before, she was

570
00:25:42,119 --> 00:25:45,320
Speaker 3: the self proclaimed leader of this cult. Everything was fine

571
00:25:45,359 --> 00:25:47,640
Speaker 3: until I went to college and moved out of our hometown.

572
00:25:48,119 --> 00:25:49,959
Speaker 2: Guess what she didn't.

573
00:25:50,280 --> 00:25:52,480
Speaker 3: She went to a college near our hometown, and let

574
00:25:52,520 --> 00:25:55,960
Speaker 3: me tell you that people there were immature and ill mannered.

575
00:25:56,520 --> 00:25:59,000
Speaker 3: I started college and Karen joined hers in.

576
00:25:59,080 --> 00:26:00,560
Speaker 2: Six months later.

577
00:26:00,920 --> 00:26:03,000
Speaker 3: In my first semester, I found a group of really

578
00:26:03,080 --> 00:26:05,439
Speaker 3: nice people I began hanging out with. I used to

579
00:26:05,440 --> 00:26:07,440
Speaker 3: tell her everything where I went, what I did, who

580
00:26:07,440 --> 00:26:10,160
Speaker 3: I met. At first, she didn't seem to care much,

581
00:26:10,200 --> 00:26:12,840
Speaker 3: probably because she always had some kind of drama going

582
00:26:12,840 --> 00:26:15,080
Speaker 3: on in her own life, which of course I had

583
00:26:15,080 --> 00:26:17,239
Speaker 3: to hear about, but I didn't mind it. Then I

584
00:26:17,280 --> 00:26:20,080
Speaker 3: started adding my college friends on social media and she

585
00:26:20,160 --> 00:26:23,399
Speaker 3: saw that. She immediately lectured me about it, saying things like,

586
00:26:23,480 --> 00:26:24,680
Speaker 3: don't you know they're boys?

587
00:26:24,800 --> 00:26:27,280
Speaker 2: Boys are bad and all that. Nonsense.

588
00:26:27,480 --> 00:26:29,880
Speaker 3: At first, I brushed it off, thinking maybe she had

589
00:26:29,880 --> 00:26:32,439
Speaker 3: a point. But deep down I knew I wasn't stupid.

590
00:26:32,600 --> 00:26:35,200
Speaker 3: I knew how to read people. I had good instincts.

591
00:26:35,440 --> 00:26:37,240
Speaker 3: I could tell who was good and who wasn't. I

592
00:26:37,280 --> 00:26:39,919
Speaker 3: didn't say anything back and just let it go. A

593
00:26:40,119 --> 00:26:43,199
Speaker 3: year past, she started college and met new people. I

594
00:26:43,240 --> 00:26:45,720
Speaker 3: didn't know them, only what she told me. At first,

595
00:26:45,800 --> 00:26:48,359
Speaker 3: she was excited, Ooh, they're nice. The girls are like this,

596
00:26:48,520 --> 00:26:50,919
Speaker 3: the boys are like that. Then she said, there's this

597
00:26:50,920 --> 00:26:53,520
Speaker 3: one guy who I think likes me. Ooh, a boy

598
00:26:53,520 --> 00:26:54,639
Speaker 3: who likes Miss Karen.

599
00:26:54,880 --> 00:26:55,680
Speaker 2: That's a big deal.

600
00:26:56,320 --> 00:26:58,320
Speaker 3: She went to lunch with him in the college cafeteria,

601
00:26:58,359 --> 00:27:00,320
Speaker 3: and the guy, of course said things like.

602
00:27:00,280 --> 00:27:02,760
Speaker 2: Ummature, I like you. I want to marry you. She

603
00:27:02,840 --> 00:27:05,399
Speaker 2: sut him down, saying no, I'm a good girl. I

604
00:27:05,440 --> 00:27:06,680
Speaker 2: don't do relationships.

605
00:27:06,760 --> 00:27:09,359
Speaker 3: We had both been single all our lives, but she

606
00:27:09,440 --> 00:27:12,440
Speaker 3: once had this weird dynamic with a tutor. She used

607
00:27:12,480 --> 00:27:14,600
Speaker 3: to tell us strange things he had said and did,

608
00:27:14,640 --> 00:27:15,800
Speaker 3: and we were too young back then.

609
00:27:15,720 --> 00:27:17,480
Speaker 2: To process it properly. Oh I don't like that.

610
00:27:17,600 --> 00:27:18,000
Speaker 4: Huh hmm.

611
00:27:18,080 --> 00:27:19,520
Speaker 2: Maybe a groomy situation.

612
00:27:19,720 --> 00:27:21,400
Speaker 5: That's not good, not good at all.

613
00:27:21,440 --> 00:27:23,720
Speaker 3: A month later, she texted me saying, remember that guy

614
00:27:23,760 --> 00:27:27,000
Speaker 3: I told you about? I said, yeah, she replied, he

615
00:27:27,080 --> 00:27:30,040
Speaker 3: keeps calling and texting me. I told her, well, if

616
00:27:30,080 --> 00:27:34,920
Speaker 3: it bothers, you block him, But of course she said no.

617
00:27:35,080 --> 00:27:37,080
Speaker 3: I don't want to give him the satisfaction of thinking

618
00:27:37,119 --> 00:27:39,600
Speaker 3: he matters that much. But I've saved his number, so

619
00:27:39,680 --> 00:27:42,600
Speaker 3: maybe I'll delete it. And I'm sitting there thinking sure.

620
00:27:43,359 --> 00:27:46,200
Speaker 3: Later she told me her new friends had done something

621
00:27:46,320 --> 00:27:48,200
Speaker 3: terrible to her, so she stopped talking to them because,

622
00:27:48,240 --> 00:27:49,600
Speaker 3: according to her, they were jealous.

623
00:27:50,440 --> 00:27:53,600
Speaker 2: Okay, Meanwhile, my group was thriving.

624
00:27:53,760 --> 00:27:58,119
Speaker 3: We're going out, eating, laughing, living, and she clearly didn't

625
00:27:58,200 --> 00:27:58,480
Speaker 3: like that.

626
00:27:59,359 --> 00:27:59,800
Speaker 2: I get it.

627
00:28:00,000 --> 00:28:01,920
Speaker 3: Anyone might feel a little jealous if their best friends

628
00:28:01,960 --> 00:28:04,320
Speaker 3: started spending more time with other people, but not to

629
00:28:04,359 --> 00:28:08,280
Speaker 3: the extent of calling them names, shaming them, or competing

630
00:28:08,320 --> 00:28:10,480
Speaker 3: for the attention that no one's even giving.

631
00:28:10,960 --> 00:28:11,880
Speaker 2: She did all of that.

632
00:28:12,000 --> 00:28:14,240
Speaker 3: She went through a lot of trauma, apparently because she

633
00:28:14,240 --> 00:28:17,679
Speaker 3: couldn't keep friends. Ironically, every single fallout was always the

634
00:28:17,720 --> 00:28:20,280
Speaker 3: other person's fault, always another big red flag.

635
00:28:20,440 --> 00:28:22,560
Speaker 2: Yeah, she is everyone else's trauma.

636
00:28:22,600 --> 00:28:23,959
Speaker 4: Actually, do you remember this callback?

637
00:28:23,960 --> 00:28:24,160
Speaker 5: ELP?

638
00:28:24,359 --> 00:28:27,639
Speaker 4: You literally had this callback, you're like, wait, this sounds

639
00:28:27,880 --> 00:28:30,600
Speaker 4: very peculiar. This sounds like high school.

640
00:28:31,080 --> 00:28:32,800
Speaker 2: Wait, it can't be.

641
00:28:33,320 --> 00:28:36,000
Speaker 3: Every time she's told me about some new person she

642
00:28:36,040 --> 00:28:38,680
Speaker 3: was getting close to, I genuinely would feel happy for her,

643
00:28:38,840 --> 00:28:41,240
Speaker 3: like finally, maybe someone normal was around.

644
00:28:41,280 --> 00:28:42,520
Speaker 2: But it never lasted.

645
00:28:43,080 --> 00:28:45,360
Speaker 3: Whenever something happened in my life and I shared it,

646
00:28:45,440 --> 00:28:49,560
Speaker 3: her reactions were always dry, like okay, fine, good. It

647
00:28:49,640 --> 00:28:52,280
Speaker 3: was strange, but I ignored it. I thought maybe she

648
00:28:52,360 --> 00:28:54,560
Speaker 3: was just going through stuff, but that hard time of

649
00:28:54,600 --> 00:28:57,520
Speaker 3: hers never seemed to end. Then that same boy came

650
00:28:57,600 --> 00:29:00,560
Speaker 3: back into the picture. She called to say he just

651
00:29:00,600 --> 00:29:03,240
Speaker 3: wanted to be friends, and she thought maybe she would

652
00:29:03,280 --> 00:29:03,920
Speaker 3: give it a try.

653
00:29:04,320 --> 00:29:06,960
Speaker 2: I told her I didn't feel good about it, but

654
00:29:07,040 --> 00:29:08,000
Speaker 2: she brushed it off.

655
00:29:08,160 --> 00:29:10,920
Speaker 3: A week later, she called again, saying he disrespected her

656
00:29:10,920 --> 00:29:11,680
Speaker 3: in front of everyone.

657
00:29:12,040 --> 00:29:13,960
Speaker 2: I told her block him.

658
00:29:14,640 --> 00:29:18,640
Speaker 3: She said, I'll talk to him first and then block him.

659
00:29:18,680 --> 00:29:21,560
Speaker 3: Mature move, I thought, But after their talk, she said

660
00:29:21,600 --> 00:29:24,160
Speaker 3: he was just going through something, and once again she

661
00:29:24,160 --> 00:29:24,960
Speaker 3: didn't block him.

662
00:29:25,000 --> 00:29:26,440
Speaker 2: Stop talking to me about this.

663
00:29:26,400 --> 00:29:27,200
Speaker 4: Guy, Opie.

664
00:29:27,280 --> 00:29:27,719
Speaker 5: I like you.

665
00:29:27,760 --> 00:29:30,760
Speaker 4: Opie's very logical. OHI He's like, you know what, I'm

666
00:29:30,760 --> 00:29:32,240
Speaker 4: gonna give you the bit of a doubt. I'm going

667
00:29:32,280 --> 00:29:34,400
Speaker 4: to give you a good reason here. Okay, don't take

668
00:29:34,400 --> 00:29:36,080
Speaker 4: my advice whatsoever. Wow.

669
00:29:36,240 --> 00:29:36,560
Speaker 5: Thanks.

670
00:29:36,720 --> 00:29:39,200
Speaker 3: By this point, i'd stop telling her about my life.

671
00:29:39,280 --> 00:29:42,440
Speaker 3: Every time I did, she'd either judge me or respond coldly,

672
00:29:42,640 --> 00:29:43,880
Speaker 3: so I just listened.

673
00:29:44,240 --> 00:29:46,080
Speaker 2: I'd sit there letting her rant about.

674
00:29:45,840 --> 00:29:48,440
Speaker 3: How she was always the victim and how everyone treated

675
00:29:48,480 --> 00:29:51,400
Speaker 3: her badly, and I was foolish enough to keep reassuring her,

676
00:29:51,760 --> 00:29:53,480
Speaker 3: telling her she wasn't at fault and that she was

677
00:29:53,520 --> 00:29:54,200
Speaker 3: a nice person.

678
00:29:54,560 --> 00:29:56,600
Speaker 2: She'd promised to set boundaries but never did.

679
00:29:57,120 --> 00:29:59,960
Speaker 3: Three years went by like that, the same cycle repeat,

680
00:30:00,200 --> 00:30:03,280
Speaker 3: with the same boy, the same drama, the same attention

681
00:30:03,400 --> 00:30:04,240
Speaker 3: seeking patterns.

682
00:30:04,800 --> 00:30:07,560
Speaker 2: It wasn't even a relationship she was trapped in. She

683
00:30:07,640 --> 00:30:10,440
Speaker 2: could have ended it by simply blocking, but she.

684
00:30:10,680 --> 00:30:14,320
Speaker 3: Didn't, could you imagine, because she liked being the center

685
00:30:14,360 --> 00:30:15,960
Speaker 3: of attention and playing the victim.

686
00:30:16,520 --> 00:30:17,760
Speaker 2: Fast forward to graduation.

687
00:30:18,120 --> 00:30:20,880
Speaker 3: I finished early because I'd started six months before her.

688
00:30:21,280 --> 00:30:24,240
Speaker 3: At my batch's farewell dinner, I posted a picture with

689
00:30:24,320 --> 00:30:26,479
Speaker 3: my friends on Instagram and she lost it.

690
00:30:27,280 --> 00:30:28,440
Speaker 5: How dare you do that?

691
00:30:28,480 --> 00:30:31,480
Speaker 2: You're such a bad friend, she said. I was done

692
00:30:31,480 --> 00:30:35,200
Speaker 2: at that point. I told her they're my friends. I've

693
00:30:35,240 --> 00:30:38,040
Speaker 2: spent four years with them. Of course I'm gonna post them.

694
00:30:38,120 --> 00:30:41,280
Speaker 4: I'm like, m, you want some peanut butter with that jelly.

695
00:30:41,040 --> 00:30:43,600
Speaker 2: Yeah, peanut butter and jealous mind you.

696
00:30:43,720 --> 00:30:47,000
Speaker 3: She would regularly post pictures with her temporary friends with

697
00:30:47,120 --> 00:30:50,400
Speaker 3: captions like partner in crime or his sister from another mother.

698
00:30:50,560 --> 00:30:52,880
Speaker 3: That was perfectly fine when she did it, but a

699
00:30:53,000 --> 00:30:56,440
Speaker 3: crime when I did. I think, deep down she resented

700
00:30:56,480 --> 00:30:58,480
Speaker 3: I got out of our hometown while she was still

701
00:30:58,520 --> 00:31:00,760
Speaker 3: stuck there. I built a lot of life and friendships

702
00:31:00,760 --> 00:31:03,360
Speaker 3: outside of that place, and she didn't. Even though she

703
00:31:03,400 --> 00:31:06,200
Speaker 3: was my best friend for eighteen years and I loved her,

704
00:31:06,520 --> 00:31:10,640
Speaker 3: she often judged me, gaslighted me, and made me feel small. Eventually,

705
00:31:10,680 --> 00:31:13,880
Speaker 3: I started a job and enrolled in a diploma program.

706
00:31:13,920 --> 00:31:16,480
Speaker 3: At the same time, I was working and studying seven

707
00:31:16,560 --> 00:31:18,240
Speaker 3: days a week, no breaks.

708
00:31:18,680 --> 00:31:20,680
Speaker 2: She only had her thesis to worry about.

709
00:31:21,120 --> 00:31:24,040
Speaker 3: I was exhausted, but still made time for replying when

710
00:31:24,080 --> 00:31:27,959
Speaker 3: I could, saying on, staying on three hour calls, listening

711
00:31:27,960 --> 00:31:32,760
Speaker 3: to her complain about everyone being Sometimes i'd reply a

712
00:31:32,760 --> 00:31:35,160
Speaker 3: few hours late because I couldn't use my phone at work,

713
00:31:35,200 --> 00:31:37,720
Speaker 3: and she'd get mad that I wasn't giving her enough attention.

714
00:31:37,960 --> 00:31:41,840
Speaker 3: She kept picking fights, saying I never had time for her.

715
00:31:42,200 --> 00:31:43,280
Speaker 2: I tried to explain my.

716
00:31:43,280 --> 00:31:45,160
Speaker 3: Routine and how hard it was and how I was

717
00:31:45,200 --> 00:31:48,120
Speaker 3: doing my best, but she always said the same thing.

718
00:31:48,600 --> 00:31:50,120
Speaker 2: You're doing this to yourself.

719
00:31:50,160 --> 00:31:52,640
Speaker 3: You could quit one thing if you wanted to why

720
00:31:53,000 --> 00:31:55,320
Speaker 3: She said, you could quit your job to give her attention.

721
00:31:55,520 --> 00:31:58,600
Speaker 2: Quit your job and quit studying to better your life.

722
00:31:58,640 --> 00:32:01,440
Speaker 4: But she couldn't block the one guy that kept bothering

723
00:32:01,480 --> 00:32:02,719
Speaker 4: her and complained to her.

724
00:32:02,840 --> 00:32:03,320
Speaker 5: You about it.

725
00:32:03,400 --> 00:32:06,880
Speaker 3: That man's crazy, ryant and complain and do nothing about it.

726
00:32:07,080 --> 00:32:08,960
Speaker 2: You don't have time to listen to me have the

727
00:32:09,040 --> 00:32:10,960
Speaker 2: same problem over and over again.

728
00:32:11,120 --> 00:32:14,880
Speaker 3: Ah, yeah, yeah, yes, I'm doing this for myself. Try

729
00:32:14,920 --> 00:32:18,000
Speaker 3: and be supportive of your friend. Then came my birthday.

730
00:32:18,360 --> 00:32:22,160
Speaker 3: She texted happy Birthday, question mark, and that was it.

731
00:32:23,360 --> 00:32:26,400
Speaker 3: Eighteen years of friendship and not even a proper wish.

732
00:32:27,040 --> 00:32:29,320
Speaker 3: I waited all day, hoping she'd post a story or

733
00:32:29,360 --> 00:32:33,320
Speaker 3: say something more heartfelt, and she didn't. Finally, around eleven PM,

734
00:32:33,360 --> 00:32:35,000
Speaker 3: I asked her why she hadn't, and as.

735
00:32:34,920 --> 00:32:36,640
Speaker 2: Usual, she twisted it around.

736
00:32:37,080 --> 00:32:39,400
Speaker 3: She said, if it mattered that much, why didn't you

737
00:32:39,440 --> 00:32:42,720
Speaker 3: ask earlier? So apparently I was supposed to beg for

738
00:32:42,800 --> 00:32:45,440
Speaker 3: my own birthday wish. She also said the only reason

739
00:32:45,480 --> 00:32:48,280
Speaker 3: I cared was because she didn't post a story like, yeah,

740
00:32:48,320 --> 00:32:50,360
Speaker 3: you're my best friend of eighteen years.

741
00:32:50,440 --> 00:32:52,840
Speaker 2: Of course I expect the proper wish.

742
00:32:52,560 --> 00:32:55,479
Speaker 3: No matter how angry I am, I would never ignore

743
00:32:55,560 --> 00:32:56,680
Speaker 3: her birthday like that.

744
00:32:56,760 --> 00:32:59,880
Speaker 2: And ruin it. Then she said, I only wished you

745
00:33:00,000 --> 00:33:02,080
Speaker 2: out of courtesy. Next time, I want to even bother.

746
00:33:02,880 --> 00:33:04,040
Speaker 5: All right, that was it.

747
00:33:05,000 --> 00:33:07,480
Speaker 2: I was done. There was another thing too.

748
00:33:07,680 --> 00:33:09,640
Speaker 3: I was supposed to visit her, but someone in our

749
00:33:09,760 --> 00:33:12,480
Speaker 3: distant family passed away and I couldn't go. I didn't

750
00:33:12,480 --> 00:33:15,160
Speaker 3: tell her right away because even I didn't know what

751
00:33:15,200 --> 00:33:18,120
Speaker 3: the plan was. Later I apologized over and over, but

752
00:33:18,200 --> 00:33:22,040
Speaker 3: she insisted that wasn't the issue. She said she suspected

753
00:33:22,120 --> 00:33:24,600
Speaker 3: I had a boyfriend and was hiding it from her,

754
00:33:25,040 --> 00:33:29,080
Speaker 3: which was such a bizarre accusation, knowing I don't even

755
00:33:29,360 --> 00:33:32,640
Speaker 3: do relationships. I swore I wasn't seeing anyone, but she

756
00:33:32,680 --> 00:33:35,720
Speaker 3: wouldn't drop it. Then she said something that hit me hard.

757
00:33:36,280 --> 00:33:37,080
Speaker 2: You're acting this.

758
00:33:37,000 --> 00:33:39,280
Speaker 3: Way because I never really asked what's going on in

759
00:33:39,320 --> 00:33:43,480
Speaker 3: your life? And that was the moment everything clicked. She

760
00:33:43,680 --> 00:33:47,400
Speaker 3: was right in every conversation. We had our long calls.

761
00:33:47,520 --> 00:33:51,480
Speaker 3: It was always about her and never about me. After that,

762
00:33:51,600 --> 00:33:54,920
Speaker 3: I stopped replying completely. She sent me voice notes. I

763
00:33:55,000 --> 00:33:58,800
Speaker 3: answered every single thing she mentioned, but she just kept saying,

764
00:33:59,000 --> 00:34:01,800
Speaker 3: you're stuck on one. I was mad when I said

765
00:34:01,800 --> 00:34:03,760
Speaker 3: those things, like she's always mad.

766
00:34:03,560 --> 00:34:07,040
Speaker 2: Then she's always mad, and it's never her fault. What

767
00:34:07,120 --> 00:34:07,880
Speaker 2: a great combo.

768
00:34:08,120 --> 00:34:10,400
Speaker 3: At one point I asked, why did you have issues

769
00:34:10,440 --> 00:34:13,520
Speaker 3: with my friends when you were posting with your college friends,

770
00:34:13,840 --> 00:34:16,600
Speaker 3: calling them partner in crime and sister from another mother.

771
00:34:17,360 --> 00:34:19,640
Speaker 3: She said, well, she helped me a lot when I

772
00:34:19,680 --> 00:34:22,239
Speaker 3: needed her. Mind you, it was the same girl she

773
00:34:22,320 --> 00:34:26,880
Speaker 3: said she hated two months earlier. After that, she stopped texting,

774
00:34:27,360 --> 00:34:30,400
Speaker 3: and so did I. She deleted my number, and two

775
00:34:30,520 --> 00:34:32,320
Speaker 3: days later I returned to the favor.

776
00:34:32,600 --> 00:34:35,960
Speaker 4: This relationship. I wouldn't even call it a friendship. Whatever

777
00:34:36,000 --> 00:34:37,240
Speaker 4: ship this is sailed.

778
00:34:37,560 --> 00:34:39,120
Speaker 2: Thank goodness, it has sunk.

779
00:34:39,200 --> 00:34:42,120
Speaker 4: This should have been done a long time ago. And

780
00:34:42,160 --> 00:34:44,319
Speaker 4: that's okay. You were you were busy, you were trying

781
00:34:44,320 --> 00:34:45,920
Speaker 4: to be a good friend. Good good on you.

782
00:34:46,160 --> 00:34:48,279
Speaker 3: When we're young, Liza with and this is a friend

783
00:34:48,280 --> 00:34:50,040
Speaker 3: you've had your whole life, and you know I've had

784
00:34:50,480 --> 00:34:53,399
Speaker 3: similar situations like that have longtime friends where things blow

785
00:34:53,480 --> 00:34:57,000
Speaker 3: up and go south. But it's that age of like

786
00:34:57,040 --> 00:35:00,600
Speaker 3: seventeen eighteen nineteen where you start to really experience like, oh, like.

787
00:35:00,680 --> 00:35:03,400
Speaker 4: What true friends are you want for yourself? And you're like,

788
00:35:03,840 --> 00:35:05,799
Speaker 4: I can I mean you're getting to that. I mean

789
00:35:05,840 --> 00:35:08,120
Speaker 4: it's like that's your twenties, you figured it out. Can

790
00:35:08,320 --> 00:35:11,040
Speaker 4: you figure out relationships even in your thirtyze, no matter

791
00:35:11,080 --> 00:35:13,120
Speaker 4: what your age, but twenties is usually when you figure

792
00:35:13,120 --> 00:35:14,799
Speaker 4: out who do you really want to hang out with?

793
00:35:14,880 --> 00:35:17,640
Speaker 4: Who do you really like? Assert yourself with? Who are

794
00:35:17,680 --> 00:35:20,840
Speaker 4: your friends like, who's nice? Who's good? Who helps you

795
00:35:20,880 --> 00:35:23,320
Speaker 4: achieve better? And definitely not her.

796
00:35:23,640 --> 00:35:26,120
Speaker 2: No, Suri, let's finish this story.

797
00:35:26,280 --> 00:35:28,840
Speaker 3: A few days later, I found out she told my sister,

798
00:35:29,280 --> 00:35:32,000
Speaker 3: playing her usual victim card, that I don't know what

799
00:35:32,120 --> 00:35:32,880
Speaker 3: happened to her.

800
00:35:33,120 --> 00:35:36,320
Speaker 2: I tried reaching out twice, but she didn't respond. Girl.

801
00:35:36,440 --> 00:35:39,319
Speaker 3: I did respond to everything, even when I was exhausted

802
00:35:39,400 --> 00:35:42,560
Speaker 3: and breaking down, and all she cared about was why I.

803
00:35:42,480 --> 00:35:43,759
Speaker 2: Didn't reply instantly.

804
00:35:44,239 --> 00:35:47,759
Speaker 3: So I sent her one final message everything I'd bottled up.

805
00:35:48,000 --> 00:35:49,759
Speaker 3: I told her exactly what she did and how she

806
00:35:49,880 --> 00:35:52,680
Speaker 3: twisted things and how she played the victim and how

807
00:35:52,719 --> 00:35:55,359
Speaker 3: she made me the villain in my own story. Then

808
00:35:55,400 --> 00:35:57,440
Speaker 3: I said I was done and I blocked her, and you.

809
00:35:57,440 --> 00:35:59,440
Speaker 2: Know what, I don't regret it.

810
00:35:59,560 --> 00:36:00,080
Speaker 5: Nice.

811
00:36:00,560 --> 00:36:04,879
Speaker 2: I missed the friendship, but I don't miss her. And

812
00:36:04,960 --> 00:36:07,080
Speaker 2: that's the end of this story. Let's head to the

813
00:36:07,080 --> 00:36:10,160
Speaker 2: next one. Hey y'all, it's John og Host here. We're

814
00:36:10,160 --> 00:36:11,640
Speaker 2: gonna get back to the stories, but here's a quick

815
00:36:11,640 --> 00:36:13,280
Speaker 2: three minute break from as for more sponsors.

816
00:36:13,600 --> 00:36:16,560
Speaker 6: Best man cried at the wedding because he's in love

817
00:36:16,640 --> 00:36:17,440
Speaker 6: with the bride.

818
00:36:17,600 --> 00:36:20,200
Speaker 5: Dang, the best man's really got the worst timing.

819
00:36:20,440 --> 00:36:24,880
Speaker 6: When my friends Alice and Dom mid twenties announced their engagement,

820
00:36:25,120 --> 00:36:27,400
Speaker 6: people were happy for them. They had been dating for

821
00:36:27,440 --> 00:36:30,480
Speaker 6: a few years, so it wasn't a huge surprise. Alice

822
00:36:30,520 --> 00:36:33,320
Speaker 6: was a social butterfly, but when she and Dom started dating,

823
00:36:33,400 --> 00:36:37,839
Speaker 6: her priorities shifted to her relationship. It didn't take long

824
00:36:37,920 --> 00:36:39,640
Speaker 6: for the two of them to be doing their own

825
00:36:39,719 --> 00:36:42,600
Speaker 6: thing all the time. By the way, this comes from

826
00:36:42,680 --> 00:36:45,080
Speaker 6: Angry Jets Fan and if you want to submit your

827
00:36:45,080 --> 00:36:47,719
Speaker 6: own stories, go to the r slash Okay storytime separate it.

828
00:36:47,880 --> 00:36:51,720
Speaker 6: I'm Sophia, I'm Matt and we're here to give good advice. Goofy,

829
00:36:51,800 --> 00:36:53,520
Speaker 6: But we don't have all the answers. We only know

830
00:36:53,560 --> 00:36:55,439
Speaker 6: what we'd do, So let us know what you would

831
00:36:55,480 --> 00:36:58,520
Speaker 6: do in the comments and OPI says. Prior to the engagement,

832
00:36:58,640 --> 00:37:01,440
Speaker 6: Alice introduced tom To to the friend group. Dom was

833
00:37:01,560 --> 00:37:04,480
Speaker 6: rough around the edges and mainly kept to himself. He

834
00:37:04,480 --> 00:37:08,040
Speaker 6: wouldn't engage in conversations, and when he did it was quick,

835
00:37:08,160 --> 00:37:12,719
Speaker 6: one word answers. He didn't seem uncomfortable, more like disinterested.

836
00:37:13,520 --> 00:37:16,719
Speaker 6: No one really vibed with Dom. He often blurred the

837
00:37:16,760 --> 00:37:20,120
Speaker 6: lines of joking around with simply being a knucklehead when

838
00:37:20,120 --> 00:37:23,759
Speaker 6: he occasionally opened up. More importantly, the guy drank way

839
00:37:23,840 --> 00:37:27,360
Speaker 6: too much, which caused additional issues. A lot of the

840
00:37:27,360 --> 00:37:30,439
Speaker 6: following story doesn't involve Dom since he took a back

841
00:37:30,480 --> 00:37:34,000
Speaker 6: seat to everything. Since Dom had no real friends, I

842
00:37:34,120 --> 00:37:36,360
Speaker 6: was asked to be a groomsman because I was friendly

843
00:37:36,400 --> 00:37:39,440
Speaker 6: with the bride. I was surprised as I wasn't a

844
00:37:39,440 --> 00:37:43,200
Speaker 6: close friend, but but I happily accepted. When the wedding

845
00:37:43,239 --> 00:37:46,319
Speaker 6: party roster was filled, I was surprised that no one

846
00:37:46,400 --> 00:37:50,480
Speaker 6: except one bridesmaid and the best man was actually close

847
00:37:50,560 --> 00:37:53,480
Speaker 6: with the couple. Even the maid of honor was surprised

848
00:37:53,520 --> 00:37:56,240
Speaker 6: to be asked for that role, as she also only

849
00:37:56,280 --> 00:37:59,920
Speaker 6: considered herself an acquaintance. Apparently, they'd lost a lot of

850
00:38:00,120 --> 00:38:02,600
Speaker 6: friends over the years, so they were scraping the bottom

851
00:38:02,640 --> 00:38:05,640
Speaker 6: of the barrel. Alice had three other really close girlfriends

852
00:38:05,680 --> 00:38:09,040
Speaker 6: who I was shocked weren't bride'smaids. I talked to one

853
00:38:09,080 --> 00:38:10,600
Speaker 6: of them at the wedding and she was on the

854
00:38:10,680 --> 00:38:13,840
Speaker 6: verge of tears, telling me how sad she was that

855
00:38:13,920 --> 00:38:17,120
Speaker 6: she wasn't asked and had no idea why. As soon

856
00:38:17,120 --> 00:38:20,719
Speaker 6: as the engagement hit, Alice distanced herself from them out

857
00:38:20,719 --> 00:38:24,640
Speaker 6: of nowhere. The best man, Mac, was Alice's childhood friend.

858
00:38:25,239 --> 00:38:27,640
Speaker 6: On the surface, they had a really close friendship, but

859
00:38:27,719 --> 00:38:30,560
Speaker 6: anyone who paid attention could tell the guy was in

860
00:38:30,600 --> 00:38:34,280
Speaker 6: love with her. The bride definitely knew this and should

861
00:38:34,320 --> 00:38:38,040
Speaker 6: have had a conversation with him, but she didn't. Mac

862
00:38:38,080 --> 00:38:40,520
Speaker 6: and Alice had a great relationship with each other, had

863
00:38:40,600 --> 00:38:44,000
Speaker 6: tons of inside jokes, knew each other inside out, and

864
00:38:44,280 --> 00:38:47,480
Speaker 6: were genuinely good friends, but she seemed to have a

865
00:38:47,520 --> 00:38:52,320
Speaker 6: better relationship with him compared to the groom. In group settings,

866
00:38:52,320 --> 00:38:54,520
Speaker 6: they would be talking and joking with each other the

867
00:38:54,760 --> 00:38:58,960
Speaker 6: entire time, while the groom was mainly just there. It

868
00:38:59,040 --> 00:39:01,279
Speaker 6: was an open secret amongst the wedding party and their

869
00:39:01,280 --> 00:39:04,160
Speaker 6: friends that Mac and Alice should be getting married, since

870
00:39:04,200 --> 00:39:07,239
Speaker 6: their relationship seems so much more genuine and loving than

871
00:39:07,320 --> 00:39:10,839
Speaker 6: with the groom. To my knowledge, there was no infidelity

872
00:39:10,880 --> 00:39:13,920
Speaker 6: going on. Alice confided in me that she did not

873
00:39:14,200 --> 00:39:18,920
Speaker 6: find Mac remotely attractive. Apparently Mac professed his feelings year

874
00:39:18,920 --> 00:39:21,759
Speaker 6: before the wedding, but she shot him down and they

875
00:39:21,840 --> 00:39:23,560
Speaker 6: worked it out. I don't know if they did. I

876
00:39:23,600 --> 00:39:25,040
Speaker 6: think he's still in love with Alice.

877
00:39:25,160 --> 00:39:28,440
Speaker 5: Yeah, I mean, I think we've been spoiled a little bit. Yeah,

878
00:39:28,480 --> 00:39:30,840
Speaker 5: but that's really rough, is that actually?

879
00:39:30,840 --> 00:39:33,399
Speaker 6: Because like anyone else knows too.

880
00:39:33,600 --> 00:39:35,960
Speaker 5: Yeah, when everyone else knows, and then everyone else can

881
00:39:36,040 --> 00:39:41,719
Speaker 5: see that her fiance isn't really like the best fit. Yeah,

882
00:39:41,800 --> 00:39:43,840
Speaker 5: that's so I mean, And the other friends seemed to

883
00:39:43,880 --> 00:39:45,720
Speaker 5: be feeding into it, saying that, like, oh.

884
00:39:45,600 --> 00:39:47,080
Speaker 6: You guys, should they should marry?

885
00:39:47,200 --> 00:39:50,080
Speaker 5: Yeah, that's not helping now my opinion.

886
00:39:50,320 --> 00:39:52,839
Speaker 6: She liked having a part time simp who could fill

887
00:39:52,880 --> 00:39:55,400
Speaker 6: in the emotional gaps left by her soon to be husband.

888
00:39:55,520 --> 00:39:58,880
Speaker 6: Both the bride and groom individually scheduled meals with everyone

889
00:39:58,920 --> 00:40:01,920
Speaker 6: in the wedding party to reach connect with my two dinners.

890
00:40:01,960 --> 00:40:05,719
Speaker 6: They both picked the restaurant, and both times they conveniently

891
00:40:05,760 --> 00:40:08,600
Speaker 6: had to go right before the bill came. Dom ordered

892
00:40:08,640 --> 00:40:10,920
Speaker 6: so much booze that it cost more than the food.

893
00:40:11,480 --> 00:40:15,120
Speaker 6: Similar things happened to other wedding party members. Another groomsman

894
00:40:15,200 --> 00:40:17,319
Speaker 6: told me that when he went out with Dom, he

895
00:40:17,440 --> 00:40:21,160
Speaker 6: ordered lobster, saying I can treat myself since you're paying

896
00:40:21,480 --> 00:40:26,040
Speaker 6: EW before even discussing the bill. Yikes, Oh that's.

897
00:40:26,360 --> 00:40:29,719
Speaker 5: A no, no, no, no, I'm not paying for your lobster.

898
00:40:29,920 --> 00:40:31,120
Speaker 6: Yeah, get your own lobster.

899
00:40:31,440 --> 00:40:32,279
Speaker 5: That's expensive.

900
00:40:32,440 --> 00:40:35,279
Speaker 6: The fact that they planned out getting free meals was

901
00:40:35,360 --> 00:40:39,240
Speaker 6: really trashy. The bride made clear the budget wasn't that big.

902
00:40:39,560 --> 00:40:43,080
Speaker 6: Alice was unsubtly very self conscious about it and would

903
00:40:43,160 --> 00:40:46,120
Speaker 6: constantly bring it up. We attempted to help with planning

904
00:40:46,200 --> 00:40:50,880
Speaker 6: and suggesting cost saving ideas, but Alice wouldn't take any suggestions.

905
00:40:51,280 --> 00:40:53,880
Speaker 6: She wanted to plan her own wedding, but was happy

906
00:40:53,920 --> 00:40:56,000
Speaker 6: to remind everyone how they were paying for it all

907
00:40:56,080 --> 00:40:59,560
Speaker 6: out of pocket. Alice flirted with the idea of making

908
00:40:59,600 --> 00:41:02,280
Speaker 6: invites into tickets that you'd have to buy to attend

909
00:41:02,280 --> 00:41:06,719
Speaker 6: the wedding. Thankfully, Alice's parents talked her out of it. Apparently,

910
00:41:06,760 --> 00:41:09,280
Speaker 6: Alice was so set on doing this that she resented

911
00:41:09,280 --> 00:41:11,960
Speaker 6: her parents for talking her out of it. The entire

912
00:41:12,040 --> 00:41:14,879
Speaker 6: wedding planning process, I could tell the relationship had been

913
00:41:14,920 --> 00:41:19,080
Speaker 6: strained and this was the main cause. Sometime after this,

914
00:41:19,160 --> 00:41:22,240
Speaker 6: the wedding invite list was purged to remove fifty people.

915
00:41:23,280 --> 00:41:26,200
Speaker 6: The wedding invites had already been sent out at this point.

916
00:41:27,120 --> 00:41:29,279
Speaker 6: But the ridiculous thing was that the couple wanted the

917
00:41:29,280 --> 00:41:34,080
Speaker 6: wedding party to help decide who. But the ridiculous thing

918
00:41:34,200 --> 00:41:36,480
Speaker 6: was that the couple wanted the wedding party to help

919
00:41:36,560 --> 00:41:39,080
Speaker 6: decide who to uninvite.

920
00:41:39,160 --> 00:41:40,840
Speaker 5: It's like a kid's a game show.

921
00:41:41,280 --> 00:41:44,280
Speaker 6: Yeah, who are we voting off the island and wanted

922
00:41:44,400 --> 00:41:46,560
Speaker 6: us to be the ones reaching out and telling people

923
00:41:46,600 --> 00:41:49,920
Speaker 6: they weren't invited anymore. This is because and I quote,

924
00:41:50,160 --> 00:41:52,560
Speaker 6: if it comes from us, they might get mad at

925
00:41:52,640 --> 00:41:55,279
Speaker 6: us and not get us a gift. We didn't even

926
00:41:55,680 --> 00:41:58,600
Speaker 6: know most of the people on it. We didn't even

927
00:41:58,680 --> 00:42:01,520
Speaker 6: know most of the people on our invite. Imagine getting

928
00:42:01,520 --> 00:42:04,360
Speaker 6: a text or email from some random person you don't

929
00:42:04,400 --> 00:42:07,640
Speaker 6: know telling you that you're no longer invited to a wedding.

930
00:42:08,320 --> 00:42:10,759
Speaker 6: No one in the wedding party volunteered, and the next

931
00:42:10,880 --> 00:42:13,439
Speaker 6: day those of us that had a plus one got

932
00:42:13,480 --> 00:42:17,640
Speaker 6: them taken away as punishment. As the wedding day came closer,

933
00:42:17,719 --> 00:42:21,880
Speaker 6: the couple started acting more unhinged. Alice canceled the bachelor

934
00:42:21,960 --> 00:42:25,200
Speaker 6: and bachelorette trip, which the wedding party planned and were

935
00:42:25,200 --> 00:42:28,040
Speaker 6: going to pay for, and told us just to give

936
00:42:28,080 --> 00:42:29,759
Speaker 6: her the money so she could use it for her

937
00:42:29,760 --> 00:42:33,239
Speaker 6: wedding instead. This included the money you had spent on

938
00:42:33,280 --> 00:42:36,400
Speaker 6: food and souvenirs, as it would make everyone's experience at

939
00:42:36,440 --> 00:42:40,120
Speaker 6: the wedding more enjoyable. This caused some fighting, as people

940
00:42:40,160 --> 00:42:43,160
Speaker 6: already took off work and made arrangements for childcare for

941
00:42:43,200 --> 00:42:46,680
Speaker 6: the trip, but they didn't care. They wanted the money

942
00:42:46,719 --> 00:42:50,360
Speaker 6: instead of the trip. It wasn't even a huge expensive trip,

943
00:42:50,800 --> 00:42:53,719
Speaker 6: it was a weekend cabin get away. The trip was

944
00:42:53,760 --> 00:42:57,080
Speaker 6: canceled only the best man gave the couple money, and

945
00:42:57,239 --> 00:42:59,520
Speaker 6: before you know it, the weekend the trip was planned,

946
00:42:59,560 --> 00:43:01,960
Speaker 6: we see on Instagram that the couple was in Vegas

947
00:43:02,440 --> 00:43:07,040
Speaker 6: alone after throwing an engagement party and a bridle shower.

948
00:43:07,480 --> 00:43:10,160
Speaker 6: They threw a last minute Jack and Jill party. The

949
00:43:10,200 --> 00:43:13,040
Speaker 6: bride bluntly said the purpose was to get more gifts

950
00:43:13,080 --> 00:43:15,160
Speaker 6: and money. These people are terrible.

951
00:43:15,719 --> 00:43:19,839
Speaker 5: This is the most materialistic wedding. My goodness, I've ever heard.

952
00:43:19,880 --> 00:43:23,200
Speaker 6: These people are absolutely dreadful. I would not go to

953
00:43:23,200 --> 00:43:23,799
Speaker 6: their west, Like.

954
00:43:23,760 --> 00:43:27,239
Speaker 5: There's the priority for them isn't to get married.

955
00:43:29,160 --> 00:43:30,760
Speaker 6: That she doesn't even like him that much.

956
00:43:31,040 --> 00:43:33,080
Speaker 2: Yeah, that was the other plot of the story, is that.

957
00:43:33,040 --> 00:43:35,520
Speaker 6: The best man's more in love with her than her groom.

958
00:43:35,800 --> 00:43:37,600
Speaker 5: I don't know. Maybe they're just not as emotional with

959
00:43:37,640 --> 00:43:40,000
Speaker 5: each other. Like I know people who are like very

960
00:43:40,040 --> 00:43:42,840
Speaker 5: committed to each other, but they're just not outwardly emotional

961
00:43:42,880 --> 00:43:45,600
Speaker 5: when it comes to their relationship. They feel like that's

962
00:43:45,600 --> 00:43:48,000
Speaker 5: a them thing that the world doesn't need to see.

963
00:43:48,160 --> 00:43:51,680
Speaker 5: But for these people, it's very difficult. Yeah, it's very

964
00:43:51,760 --> 00:43:54,000
Speaker 5: much like, Yo, you want to do this scam with me?

965
00:43:54,520 --> 00:43:57,719
Speaker 6: Yeah, this is a scam wedding. Maybe that's it. Maybe

966
00:43:57,760 --> 00:43:59,680
Speaker 6: they're never you know, they never planned to get married.

967
00:43:59,680 --> 00:44:02,000
Speaker 6: They're just to scam people out of money. The bride

968
00:44:02,239 --> 00:44:06,600
Speaker 6: uh oh worse, Alice purposefully invited people who had been

969
00:44:06,680 --> 00:44:09,680
Speaker 6: uninvited from the wedding so she could still get money

970
00:44:09,719 --> 00:44:12,160
Speaker 6: and gifts from them. I called her out on this,

971
00:44:12,440 --> 00:44:14,400
Speaker 6: but she said I don't understand what it's like to

972
00:44:14,440 --> 00:44:17,480
Speaker 6: throw a wedding and that everyone doesn't. Day of the party,

973
00:44:17,600 --> 00:44:20,920
Speaker 6: only one of the formally uninvited people showed up and

974
00:44:21,000 --> 00:44:24,359
Speaker 6: they didn't bring a gift. One of the bride'smaids, Kay

975
00:44:24,560 --> 00:44:27,520
Speaker 6: was also engaged and got married a month before Alice

976
00:44:27,520 --> 00:44:31,680
Speaker 6: in Dom's wedding, and this caused drama. Kay and her

977
00:44:31,680 --> 00:44:35,960
Speaker 6: fiance both came from wealthy families and threw an insane wedding,

978
00:44:36,719 --> 00:44:39,560
Speaker 6: but Kay was the most humble person ever and didn't

979
00:44:39,600 --> 00:44:42,960
Speaker 6: even mention her wedding in front of Alice. Alice, however,

980
00:44:43,040 --> 00:44:45,680
Speaker 6: went out of her way to always compare her wedding

981
00:44:45,680 --> 00:44:50,640
Speaker 6: plans to Kay's and make Kay feel uncomfortable. After Kay's wedding,

982
00:44:50,760 --> 00:44:53,360
Speaker 6: Alice accused her of putting more money into her wedding

983
00:44:53,480 --> 00:44:57,000
Speaker 6: in an attempt to be better than Alice's. This behavior

984
00:44:57,120 --> 00:44:59,600
Speaker 6: was constant and led Kay to drop out of being

985
00:44:59,600 --> 00:45:03,239
Speaker 6: a bride. Alice begged her to stay while apologizing, which

986
00:45:03,320 --> 00:45:08,440
Speaker 6: Kay reluctantly agreed to very quick vignette. The wedding party

987
00:45:08,480 --> 00:45:11,160
Speaker 6: plus a few other people discovered that Alice was starting

988
00:45:11,239 --> 00:45:13,200
Speaker 6: rumors to get each other mad at each other, but

989
00:45:13,239 --> 00:45:15,279
Speaker 6: would then offer to talk to the other person to

990
00:45:15,280 --> 00:45:18,680
Speaker 6: help fix things. A good example was Alice telling Kay

991
00:45:18,800 --> 00:45:22,239
Speaker 6: that I hated her husband's actions during her wedding, but

992
00:45:22,480 --> 00:45:25,200
Speaker 6: then she talked to me and but that she talked

993
00:45:25,239 --> 00:45:28,279
Speaker 6: me into calming down and not mentioning it. Kay talked

994
00:45:28,280 --> 00:45:30,680
Speaker 6: to me directly about this since we're adults and not

995
00:45:30,719 --> 00:45:33,239
Speaker 6: in high school, and I had no idea what she

996
00:45:33,360 --> 00:45:36,520
Speaker 6: was talking about. Her husband is a close childhood friend

997
00:45:36,600 --> 00:45:38,720
Speaker 6: and we had the time of her lives at this wedding.

998
00:45:39,440 --> 00:45:43,160
Speaker 6: Similar instances happened with other people too, with Alice saying

999
00:45:43,200 --> 00:45:46,719
Speaker 6: something completely false but claiming she already fixed it by

1000
00:45:46,719 --> 00:45:49,839
Speaker 6: talking to the other person. I asked the best man Mac,

1001
00:45:49,960 --> 00:45:51,880
Speaker 6: what the heck was going on, and all I was

1002
00:45:51,920 --> 00:45:54,120
Speaker 6: able to get out of him was that Alice means

1003
00:45:54,160 --> 00:45:56,279
Speaker 6: well and just wants to be there for us if

1004
00:45:56,320 --> 00:45:59,080
Speaker 6: we're having problems with each other. But it sure felt

1005
00:45:59,080 --> 00:46:01,799
Speaker 6: like Alice was trying to tear us all apart. We

1006
00:46:01,880 --> 00:46:04,320
Speaker 6: all go to the rehearsal dinner the day before the wedding,

1007
00:46:04,640 --> 00:46:08,120
Speaker 6: the rehearsal wasn't at the venue and instead was at

1008
00:46:08,160 --> 00:46:11,440
Speaker 6: some tiny church on practically the other side of the state,

1009
00:46:11,960 --> 00:46:14,600
Speaker 6: which was a long drive for all of us. The

1010
00:46:14,680 --> 00:46:18,120
Speaker 6: church's layout was completely different than the venue, and the

1011
00:46:18,200 --> 00:46:22,120
Speaker 6: couple had no connection to this church. Rehearsal started at

1012
00:46:22,160 --> 00:46:25,279
Speaker 6: six and ended forty five minutes later, and the couple

1013
00:46:25,360 --> 00:46:28,879
Speaker 6: said thanks and dismissed us. I spoke up and said

1014
00:46:28,920 --> 00:46:33,120
Speaker 6: what about dinner? And Alice responded, Oh, we didn't plan

1015
00:46:33,200 --> 00:46:36,520
Speaker 6: on feeding you guys, but there are a few places

1016
00:46:36,560 --> 00:46:39,680
Speaker 6: around here if you wanted to get dinner. I'm sorry.

1017
00:46:40,960 --> 00:46:45,120
Speaker 6: At the rehearsal dinner, there was some dinner.

1018
00:46:46,080 --> 00:46:48,920
Speaker 5: You didn't even get pizza for anybody, Like that's cheap.

1019
00:46:48,960 --> 00:46:51,799
Speaker 5: I would, I'd be like, okay, what is this like

1020
00:46:51,840 --> 00:46:55,040
Speaker 5: sixth grade? But also I will not say no to pizza.

1021
00:46:55,040 --> 00:46:56,360
Speaker 5: I think I'm gonna get pizza after this.

1022
00:46:56,520 --> 00:47:01,120
Speaker 6: Now I get pizza. I don't make pizza. Oh, I

1023
00:47:01,160 --> 00:47:02,279
Speaker 6: get the Trader Joe's dough.

1024
00:47:03,000 --> 00:47:04,759
Speaker 5: I bet you a pizza party would be better than

1025
00:47:04,760 --> 00:47:08,400
Speaker 5: this wedding. Yeah, Op, why you still there? Yeah? Why

1026
00:47:08,400 --> 00:47:11,120
Speaker 5: are you as the old piece? Unless you're like living

1027
00:47:11,160 --> 00:47:13,640
Speaker 5: for this drama? Yeah, it doesn't even sound like piece

1028
00:47:13,760 --> 00:47:15,279
Speaker 5: very close to these people, she.

1029
00:47:15,280 --> 00:47:17,399
Speaker 6: Said at the beginning, she said at the beginning, I'm

1030
00:47:17,400 --> 00:47:18,840
Speaker 6: not very close to these people.

1031
00:47:19,360 --> 00:47:23,640
Speaker 5: I guess this is probably like the most exciting thing. Yeah,

1032
00:47:23,640 --> 00:47:25,319
Speaker 5: happened to this friend group in a while. It's like,

1033
00:47:25,360 --> 00:47:27,799
Speaker 5: I guess I have the week off. It's like, how

1034
00:47:27,840 --> 00:47:30,239
Speaker 5: like people in a murder mystery, like don't leave the

1035
00:47:30,320 --> 00:47:30,920
Speaker 5: murder scene.

1036
00:47:31,120 --> 00:47:36,720
Speaker 6: Yeah, and Alice responded, Oh, we didn't plan on feeding

1037
00:47:36,719 --> 00:47:38,200
Speaker 6: you guys, but there are a few places around here

1038
00:47:38,239 --> 00:47:40,919
Speaker 6: if you wanted to get dinner. We'd all driven over

1039
00:47:40,960 --> 00:47:43,759
Speaker 6: an hour to the middle of nowhere for this thing

1040
00:47:43,880 --> 00:47:47,319
Speaker 6: that started at six pm. Alice quickly read the room

1041
00:47:47,360 --> 00:47:50,040
Speaker 6: and realized we were about to bail on the wedding itself,

1042
00:47:50,360 --> 00:47:54,359
Speaker 6: so she backtracked and said she figured it out. An

1043
00:47:54,400 --> 00:47:57,960
Speaker 6: hour later. We were eating subs from a local grocery store.

1044
00:47:58,360 --> 00:48:01,880
Speaker 6: You couldn't have asked for better weather. Hi seventies, low eighties,

1045
00:48:02,040 --> 00:48:06,600
Speaker 6: no humidity, not a cloud in the sky. Absolutely beautiful.

1046
00:48:07,040 --> 00:48:08,960
Speaker 6: It was a shame we didn't get to enjoy it.

1047
00:48:09,120 --> 00:48:11,360
Speaker 6: I pulled up to the venue ninety minutes before the

1048
00:48:11,400 --> 00:48:15,040
Speaker 6: ceremony and immediately commented on the weather. Another groomsman cut

1049
00:48:15,080 --> 00:48:17,359
Speaker 6: me off and told me to shush, as they didn't

1050
00:48:17,400 --> 00:48:20,760
Speaker 6: go for the outdoor wedding package to save money. Ten

1051
00:48:20,800 --> 00:48:23,400
Speaker 6: minutes prior, someone had commented on the weather and got

1052
00:48:23,440 --> 00:48:27,360
Speaker 6: berated by Alice for money shaming her. The difference for

1053
00:48:27,400 --> 00:48:30,200
Speaker 6: the outdoor wedding was two hundred and fifty dollars. The

1054
00:48:30,280 --> 00:48:33,000
Speaker 6: venue had no air conditioning and the thick floor to

1055
00:48:33,080 --> 00:48:37,560
Speaker 6: ceiling windows acted as a greenhouse. The wedding party showed

1056
00:48:37,640 --> 00:48:40,600
Speaker 6: up ninety minutes early, dressed in our wedding attire to

1057
00:48:40,640 --> 00:48:43,640
Speaker 6: a venue that was not set up. The couple didn't

1058
00:48:43,680 --> 00:48:46,480
Speaker 6: want to pay the venue to set up chairs or decorations,

1059
00:48:46,960 --> 00:48:51,440
Speaker 6: so they ambushed us with that responsibility. We reluctantly set

1060
00:48:51,520 --> 00:48:54,719
Speaker 6: up the venue, with Alice micromanaging on the wedding party

1061
00:48:54,719 --> 00:48:56,960
Speaker 6: group chat. We all decided to be bigger people and

1062
00:48:57,080 --> 00:48:59,200
Speaker 6: just put up with them for one more day, and

1063
00:48:59,280 --> 00:49:02,840
Speaker 6: we got sweat putting everything together. The ceremony and reception

1064
00:49:02,960 --> 00:49:05,600
Speaker 6: took place in the same room with round tables set

1065
00:49:05,640 --> 00:49:07,719
Speaker 6: up and the altar at one of the walls.

1066
00:49:08,160 --> 00:49:12,120
Speaker 5: You're really putting this yeah on your wedding party, who've

1067
00:49:12,120 --> 00:49:16,280
Speaker 5: spent time and effort already. Yeah, and likely in clothing

1068
00:49:16,280 --> 00:49:17,840
Speaker 5: that's not supposed to move like that.

1069
00:49:18,080 --> 00:49:20,560
Speaker 6: No, especially like the women in dress.

1070
00:49:20,239 --> 00:49:22,239
Speaker 5: It they're not supposed to move like that.

1071
00:49:22,360 --> 00:49:25,759
Speaker 6: Yeah, that kind of swat. It's hot. We already know

1072
00:49:25,800 --> 00:49:26,239
Speaker 6: it's hot.

1073
00:49:26,400 --> 00:49:28,920
Speaker 5: They're not even probably in dancing entire ye. No, so

1074
00:49:28,960 --> 00:49:31,200
Speaker 5: they can't even Like that would be a little bit

1075
00:49:31,200 --> 00:49:33,799
Speaker 5: more understandable. Yeah, like if you had to like set

1076
00:49:33,840 --> 00:49:34,800
Speaker 5: up for the after party.

1077
00:49:34,880 --> 00:49:37,719
Speaker 6: Yeah, is she a right wedding dress? Yeah, it's ninety

1078
00:49:37,760 --> 00:49:38,680
Speaker 6: minutes before the wedding.

1079
00:49:39,040 --> 00:49:40,640
Speaker 5: She didn't pay for the I need to put my

1080
00:49:40,960 --> 00:49:43,360
Speaker 5: clothes on in the dressing room package.

1081
00:49:43,440 --> 00:49:45,680
Speaker 6: Yeah, she's got like a little towel outside that they're

1082
00:49:45,719 --> 00:49:48,080
Speaker 6: gonna hold up or the ceremony. More than half the

1083
00:49:48,120 --> 00:49:50,600
Speaker 6: people needed to adjust their seats to face the right

1084
00:49:50,640 --> 00:49:54,440
Speaker 6: direction the ceremony started. There was no dress code on

1085
00:49:54,440 --> 00:49:57,360
Speaker 6: the wedding invites, so people were dressed all over the spectrum,

1086
00:49:57,640 --> 00:50:01,040
Speaker 6: from tailor's suits to jeans and sneakers. The photographer and

1087
00:50:01,160 --> 00:50:05,279
Speaker 6: videographer were good professionals with quality equipment only issue. They

1088
00:50:05,280 --> 00:50:09,440
Speaker 6: were both over six feet tall, built like linebackers, and

1089
00:50:09,560 --> 00:50:14,120
Speaker 6: didn't wear invisibility cloaks during the ceremony. Three elderly guests

1090
00:50:14,239 --> 00:50:19,240
Speaker 6: kept shouting I can't see, you're blocking my view whenever

1091
00:50:19,280 --> 00:50:21,480
Speaker 6: one got in front of them. The pictures ended up

1092
00:50:21,520 --> 00:50:24,800
Speaker 6: being great. Though the wedding was supposed to start at two.

1093
00:50:25,360 --> 00:50:28,160
Speaker 6: At two twenty five, he got the signal they were ready. Honestly,

1094
00:50:28,239 --> 00:50:30,440
Speaker 6: that's not that bad. No, twenty five minutes, not that bad.

1095
00:50:30,520 --> 00:50:33,160
Speaker 5: That's nothing. It's like, you watch a couple YouTube videos.

1096
00:50:33,200 --> 00:50:35,400
Speaker 2: Yeah, you're like, listen, you listen.

1097
00:50:35,200 --> 00:50:37,800
Speaker 5: To an episode of Okay story Time while you wait.

1098
00:50:37,920 --> 00:50:41,200
Speaker 6: You know, it's easy. We got into positions and quieted

1099
00:50:41,239 --> 00:50:44,440
Speaker 6: the crowd. At two fifty one, the bride'smaids and bride

1100
00:50:44,680 --> 00:50:48,000
Speaker 6: finally came out to the Superman theme song. We were

1101
00:50:48,040 --> 00:50:52,440
Speaker 6: already uncomfortable with a stagnant hot air. The ceremony was

1102
00:50:52,480 --> 00:50:55,240
Speaker 6: longer than it should have been. The bride's family performed

1103
00:50:55,280 --> 00:50:58,400
Speaker 6: three separate four plus minute original songs that were varying

1104
00:50:58,440 --> 00:51:02,080
Speaker 6: levels of bad, with the occasional I can't see throughout

1105
00:51:02,400 --> 00:51:06,120
Speaker 6: adding flavor. The bride's vows went on and on, while

1106
00:51:06,160 --> 00:51:08,400
Speaker 6: the groom's vows were two or three lines that he

1107
00:51:08,480 --> 00:51:11,439
Speaker 6: didn't memorize. The groom looked like he didn't even want

1108
00:51:11,480 --> 00:51:15,839
Speaker 6: to be there. Bride and groom kissed. Then came the speeches.

1109
00:51:16,160 --> 00:51:18,640
Speaker 6: The maid of honor went first and delivered a textbook

1110
00:51:18,640 --> 00:51:21,319
Speaker 6: speech talking about how well she knew the bride, how

1111
00:51:21,400 --> 00:51:23,799
Speaker 6: much they loved each other, and how happy she was

1112
00:51:23,840 --> 00:51:27,480
Speaker 6: to see her on her wedding day. Then came the

1113
00:51:27,520 --> 00:51:32,960
Speaker 6: best man, finally the title of the story, and as

1114
00:51:33,000 --> 00:51:36,600
Speaker 6: soon as he started his voice was already cracking. He

1115
00:51:36,680 --> 00:51:40,440
Speaker 6: proceeded to spend the next five minutes detailing his experiences

1116
00:51:40,440 --> 00:51:43,600
Speaker 6: with Alice and how close they were and how important

1117
00:51:43,640 --> 00:51:46,480
Speaker 6: she was in his life. The poor guy had to

1118
00:51:46,520 --> 00:51:50,520
Speaker 6: stop to compose himself twice. He was fighting tears as

1119
00:51:50,520 --> 00:51:53,719
Speaker 6: he described the wonderful memories they had together, how she

1120
00:51:53,840 --> 00:51:56,879
Speaker 6: made him feel, and how amazing she was. The whole

1121
00:51:56,920 --> 00:52:00,759
Speaker 6: time during the speech, the bride looked so touched and happy. Well,

1122
00:52:00,840 --> 00:52:04,920
Speaker 6: everyone else looked horrified. The speech ended with him wishing

1123
00:52:04,960 --> 00:52:06,960
Speaker 6: her the best in her new chapter in life and

1124
00:52:07,000 --> 00:52:10,040
Speaker 6: that he'd always be there for with tears running down

1125
00:52:10,080 --> 00:52:13,360
Speaker 6: his face. Not once did the best man mention the

1126
00:52:13,400 --> 00:52:17,640
Speaker 6: groom during his speech. The only thing I will say, oh, actually,

1127
00:52:17,680 --> 00:52:20,080
Speaker 6: could you give rid of the widgets on that perfect Okay?

1128
00:52:20,440 --> 00:52:24,839
Speaker 6: The only thing I will say, Why would you pick

1129
00:52:25,400 --> 00:52:30,200
Speaker 6: your best man to be your partner's best friend? You know, like,

1130
00:52:30,280 --> 00:52:31,799
Speaker 6: if you want a best man who's got to talk

1131
00:52:31,840 --> 00:52:34,480
Speaker 6: about the groom, maybe pick the groom's best friend, not

1132
00:52:34,880 --> 00:52:36,320
Speaker 6: the bride's best friend.

1133
00:52:36,360 --> 00:52:39,799
Speaker 5: Why would maybe he has no friends, seems like it.

1134
00:52:39,840 --> 00:52:42,480
Speaker 6: The groom didn't even seem to mind, and he just

1135
00:52:42,520 --> 00:52:45,239
Speaker 6: sat there the entire time with a blank expression on

1136
00:52:45,280 --> 00:52:48,120
Speaker 6: his face. The finger food was good, but the issue

1137
00:52:48,160 --> 00:52:50,759
Speaker 6: came with the drinks. It was a dry wedding, but

1138
00:52:50,840 --> 00:52:52,920
Speaker 6: no one bothered to tell the groom as he was

1139
00:52:53,000 --> 00:52:56,240
Speaker 6: hitting a flask. The entire reception, there was no attempt

1140
00:52:56,280 --> 00:52:59,200
Speaker 6: to have any effort for the drinks, no mocktails or anything.

1141
00:52:59,600 --> 00:53:03,160
Speaker 6: The drink situation was this, these boxed twenty four packs

1142
00:53:03,160 --> 00:53:05,279
Speaker 6: of sodas you get from a grocery store, sitting on

1143
00:53:05,280 --> 00:53:07,440
Speaker 6: the counter, still in the boxes.

1144
00:53:07,120 --> 00:53:08,000
Speaker 5: Not even on ice.

1145
00:53:08,280 --> 00:53:12,640
Speaker 6: Yikes today. They were all store brand, warm and mainly flat.

1146
00:53:13,120 --> 00:53:14,920
Speaker 6: It was like they'd been sitting at a car for

1147
00:53:14,960 --> 00:53:16,880
Speaker 6: a few weeks. There was a bowl of ice and

1148
00:53:16,920 --> 00:53:19,359
Speaker 6: some solo cups, but the ice was put out before

1149
00:53:19,400 --> 00:53:22,279
Speaker 6: the ceremony was supposed to start, so by the time

1150
00:53:22,320 --> 00:53:24,320
Speaker 6: of the cocktail hour, it was a bowl of water.

1151
00:53:24,640 --> 00:53:27,640
Speaker 6: Mind you, we were all in a non air conditioned greenhouse,

1152
00:53:27,640 --> 00:53:31,359
Speaker 6: so we were all passing away. There was no additional ice.

1153
00:53:31,840 --> 00:53:33,720
Speaker 6: I was going to go to a nearby gas station

1154
00:53:33,800 --> 00:53:36,760
Speaker 6: to get ice, but uncle of the groom offered instead

1155
00:53:36,800 --> 00:53:40,919
Speaker 6: and left. He never came back. Besides the soda, there

1156
00:53:40,960 --> 00:53:43,520
Speaker 6: was a water fountain and a CA cup machine for coffee.

1157
00:53:44,080 --> 00:53:46,640
Speaker 6: Food was pretty great, not gonna lie. It was catered

1158
00:53:46,680 --> 00:53:49,520
Speaker 6: by a family friend who had a Greek restaurant. Very good,

1159
00:53:49,680 --> 00:53:52,319
Speaker 6: ten out of ten. Best part of the wedding. At

1160
00:53:52,400 --> 00:53:55,080
Speaker 6: least you had food. Honestly, if I didn't have food

1161
00:53:55,120 --> 00:53:56,960
Speaker 6: and I was dealing with all this, I would be

1162
00:53:57,239 --> 00:53:58,200
Speaker 6: crying because.

1163
00:53:57,960 --> 00:54:02,280
Speaker 5: That you're hot, Yeah, you're tired, You're thirsty, and you're hungry,

1164
00:54:02,880 --> 00:54:06,040
Speaker 5: and you you couldn't even see the wedding because yeah,

1165
00:54:06,360 --> 00:54:09,480
Speaker 5: the tall lineman. What did I even get out of

1166
00:54:09,480 --> 00:54:10,520
Speaker 5: this experience?

1167
00:54:10,600 --> 00:54:14,120
Speaker 6: No DJ or band for the wedding, just a Spotify playlist.

1168
00:54:14,640 --> 00:54:16,839
Speaker 6: The bride made it with no input from anyone else.

1169
00:54:17,080 --> 00:54:19,680
Speaker 6: She was adamant about having people dancing and go and

1170
00:54:19,719 --> 00:54:22,400
Speaker 6: would go to tables rudely asking why they weren't dancing.

1171
00:54:23,080 --> 00:54:26,799
Speaker 6: The music was horrible. There wasn't a single dance song

1172
00:54:26,920 --> 00:54:29,920
Speaker 6: on the playlist. The bride didn't want songs like the

1173
00:54:29,960 --> 00:54:35,000
Speaker 6: Wobble Chacha Slide, the Makarena, Cupid Shuffle, et cetera, because

1174
00:54:35,000 --> 00:54:37,520
Speaker 6: she thought they were trashy and thought most pop music

1175
00:54:37,560 --> 00:54:39,399
Speaker 6: was satanic. Who is this?

1176
00:54:39,400 --> 00:54:40,720
Speaker 5: Who?

1177
00:54:41,960 --> 00:54:42,560
Speaker 2: Okay?

1178
00:54:42,760 --> 00:54:46,040
Speaker 5: So you go to Las Vegas aka Sin City? Yes,

1179
00:54:46,239 --> 00:54:48,640
Speaker 5: and then you're worried about because I I don't think

1180
00:54:48,680 --> 00:54:52,960
Speaker 5: it's I've been to Vegas many times. There's people I've

1181
00:54:53,040 --> 00:54:56,520
Speaker 5: known who refuse to heal because it's Sin City. Yeah,

1182
00:54:56,719 --> 00:55:00,720
Speaker 5: But then it seems like this is what you'll go aware,

1183
00:55:00,960 --> 00:55:03,640
Speaker 5: but you won't listen to pop music because.

1184
00:55:03,360 --> 00:55:08,640
Speaker 6: It's satan crazy. So imagine getting dragged to the dance

1185
00:55:08,640 --> 00:55:11,040
Speaker 6: floor to try to get down to Clocks by Coldplay?

1186
00:55:11,200 --> 00:55:14,160
Speaker 6: How exactly do you get jiggy with it to Karma Police?

1187
00:55:14,360 --> 00:55:16,239
Speaker 6: Anyone know? To tear up the dance floor to It's

1188
00:55:16,280 --> 00:55:19,120
Speaker 6: My Life by Bon Jovi. The best part of any

1189
00:55:19,160 --> 00:55:22,000
Speaker 6: reception is a circle forming around people break dancing to

1190
00:55:22,120 --> 00:55:26,480
Speaker 6: Pink Houses by John Mellencamp. Right after like forty five

1191
00:55:26,520 --> 00:55:29,239
Speaker 6: minutes of awkwardly being on the sweaty dance floor, as

1192
00:55:29,280 --> 00:55:32,560
Speaker 6: the third power ballad in a row came on, people

1193
00:55:32,640 --> 00:55:35,399
Speaker 6: started to leave. It was one of those things where

1194
00:55:35,440 --> 00:55:37,879
Speaker 6: as soon as the first people left, a tidal wave

1195
00:55:37,960 --> 00:55:41,360
Speaker 6: of everyone else leaving came after the father of the

1196
00:55:41,360 --> 00:55:44,480
Speaker 6: bride started taking down the decorations and asked for help.

1197
00:55:45,080 --> 00:55:47,719
Speaker 6: I wanted to avoid the angry looking Alice, who was

1198
00:55:47,760 --> 00:55:51,360
Speaker 6: beginning to argue with Tom over something, so I happily assisted.

1199
00:55:52,000 --> 00:55:54,319
Speaker 6: We put everything in boxes and caught up with the

1200
00:55:54,400 --> 00:55:57,520
Speaker 6: remaining members of the wedding party. At this point, there

1201
00:55:57,560 --> 00:56:00,239
Speaker 6: was only a handful of family left besides us, and

1202
00:56:00,320 --> 00:56:03,360
Speaker 6: the couple was nowhere to be found. According to the

1203
00:56:03,400 --> 00:56:06,239
Speaker 6: father of the bride, Alice, dom Mack and the mother

1204
00:56:06,280 --> 00:56:09,200
Speaker 6: of the bride were talking in the changing room. The

1205
00:56:09,320 --> 00:56:11,960
Speaker 6: dad gave us a heartfelt thank you for everything and

1206
00:56:12,040 --> 00:56:14,040
Speaker 6: said that there was no point for us to stay

1207
00:56:14,640 --> 00:56:18,000
Speaker 6: as practically everyone had left at that point. We helped

1208
00:56:18,040 --> 00:56:19,760
Speaker 6: him load up his truck with some of the equipment

1209
00:56:19,800 --> 00:56:22,680
Speaker 6: he bought. We went back inside to say goodbye to

1210
00:56:22,760 --> 00:56:25,120
Speaker 6: the couple, but as we came to the changing room door,

1211
00:56:25,719 --> 00:56:28,640
Speaker 6: all we heard was muffled yelling, so we figured it

1212
00:56:28,719 --> 00:56:31,960
Speaker 6: was best not to go in. We all went to

1213
00:56:32,000 --> 00:56:35,520
Speaker 6: a bar and got some drinks to decompress. Unsurprisingly, we

1214
00:56:35,600 --> 00:56:38,840
Speaker 6: found a lot of people from the wedding there enjoying

1215
00:56:38,880 --> 00:56:42,520
Speaker 6: the ac and coal shrinks. After writing this all down,

1216
00:56:42,600 --> 00:56:46,000
Speaker 6: I realized that there are much worse wedding disasters on

1217
00:56:46,040 --> 00:56:48,439
Speaker 6: the sub But it was the build up that made

1218
00:56:48,480 --> 00:56:51,160
Speaker 6: everything worse than you. Being hot and muggy while we

1219
00:56:51,200 --> 00:56:54,920
Speaker 6: had virtually nothing to cool off with, made emotions high,

1220
00:56:55,040 --> 00:56:57,439
Speaker 6: and maybe in a world where there was a sea

1221
00:56:57,640 --> 00:57:00,279
Speaker 6: wouldn't have been so bad. There is a lit little

1222
00:57:00,320 --> 00:57:04,120
Speaker 6: bit left to this story. Any final thoughts.

1223
00:57:04,520 --> 00:57:07,560
Speaker 5: I'm surprised that the wedding actually even happened, me too,

1224
00:57:08,080 --> 00:57:09,000
Speaker 5: that anyone came.

1225
00:57:09,320 --> 00:57:12,319
Speaker 6: I know that that people stayed for as long as

1226
00:57:12,360 --> 00:57:14,960
Speaker 6: they did, stay to pretty much the end, maybe just

1227
00:57:15,000 --> 00:57:17,240
Speaker 6: because of the Greek food that was the only the

1228
00:57:17,280 --> 00:57:18,480
Speaker 6: only draw in to this wedding.

1229
00:57:18,680 --> 00:57:22,160
Speaker 5: But like you can, you can go get food on

1230
00:57:22,160 --> 00:57:22,520
Speaker 5: your own.

1231
00:57:22,600 --> 00:57:24,480
Speaker 6: Yeah, I'm sure there's got to be a Greek restaurant

1232
00:57:24,520 --> 00:57:27,120
Speaker 6: around the corner, I mean, or not around the corner.

1233
00:57:28,040 --> 00:57:28,320
Speaker 4: Good.

1234
00:57:28,600 --> 00:57:30,680
Speaker 5: Yeah, but I can buy a urro on my own.

1235
00:57:31,640 --> 00:57:33,160
Speaker 5: It's okay.

1236
00:57:33,360 --> 00:57:33,600
Speaker 4: Wow.

1237
00:57:33,680 --> 00:57:35,760
Speaker 6: I hope that you're not friends with these people anymore.

1238
00:57:35,960 --> 00:57:37,680
Speaker 6: I would never talk to these people again.

1239
00:57:37,760 --> 00:57:41,480
Speaker 5: No, I was gonna ask you is yeah, after this wedding, Like,

1240
00:57:41,600 --> 00:57:43,600
Speaker 5: how does anyone remain friends with these people?

1241
00:57:43,880 --> 00:57:46,560
Speaker 6: I don't. I'm like, hey, like they talk to me,

1242
00:57:46,640 --> 00:57:49,760
Speaker 6: I don't you know. I respond in short two word

1243
00:57:49,840 --> 00:57:54,280
Speaker 6: answers like thanks, you know, great wedding to year round.

1244
00:57:54,480 --> 00:57:56,680
Speaker 6: That's it. That's all they're getting for me. I hate

1245
00:57:56,680 --> 00:57:59,440
Speaker 6: these people, but there is a little left. In the

1246
00:57:59,520 --> 00:58:02,479
Speaker 6: days and weeks following, no one could stop talking about

1247
00:58:02,480 --> 00:58:04,800
Speaker 6: the best man speech. Now we all felt bad for

1248
00:58:04,880 --> 00:58:08,920
Speaker 6: him and couldn't believe what we witnessed. The couple burned

1249
00:58:08,920 --> 00:58:11,520
Speaker 6: a lot of bridges during the whole wedding process, so

1250
00:58:11,680 --> 00:58:14,160
Speaker 6: no one really knows how they're all still doing. But

1251
00:58:14,280 --> 00:58:17,120
Speaker 6: to my knowledge, they're still married with Max still in

1252
00:58:17,160 --> 00:58:21,000
Speaker 6: the picture. So strange. I'm happy the couple isn't in

1253
00:58:21,040 --> 00:58:23,440
Speaker 6: my life anymore, but I honestly hope they have a

1254
00:58:23,480 --> 00:58:26,320
Speaker 6: healthy and happy marriage and life together. I'm sure in

1255
00:58:26,360 --> 00:58:28,760
Speaker 6: their version of this, me and the wedding party are

1256
00:58:28,800 --> 00:58:33,000
Speaker 6: the villains who ruined their special day. But hey, that's life,

1257
00:58:33,880 --> 00:58:34,880
Speaker 6: and that's the end of story.

1258
00:58:35,920 --> 00:58:37,600
Speaker 1: Hey it's Sam. We're gonna get back to the stories.

1259
00:58:37,640 --> 00:58:39,440
Speaker 1: But here's three minutes of bads from our sponsors.

1260
00:58:40,600 --> 00:58:44,080
Speaker 5: My best friend turned greedy over her wedding and I

1261
00:58:44,320 --> 00:58:45,120
Speaker 5: was her victim.

1262
00:58:45,320 --> 00:58:47,000
Speaker 6: No let me out.

1263
00:58:47,200 --> 00:58:48,920
Speaker 5: I have a best friend who is soon to be

1264
00:58:48,960 --> 00:58:51,520
Speaker 5: a bride and a not so soon to be ex

1265
00:58:51,600 --> 00:58:55,840
Speaker 5: best friend after her tackie wedding. This fall, by the way,

1266
00:58:55,880 --> 00:58:58,760
Speaker 5: this comes from anything or anyone. And if you want

1267
00:58:58,800 --> 00:59:00,920
Speaker 5: to submit your own stories like this, we'll go to

1268
00:59:01,000 --> 00:59:05,080
Speaker 5: the r slash okay storytime subreddit. I am Matt, I'm Sophia,

1269
00:59:05,760 --> 00:59:08,240
Speaker 5: and we are here to give you good advice. Goofully,

1270
00:59:08,280 --> 00:59:10,600
Speaker 5: but we don't have all the answers, as nice as

1271
00:59:10,600 --> 00:59:12,600
Speaker 5: that would be, we only know what we would do

1272
00:59:12,640 --> 00:59:15,200
Speaker 5: in these situations, So let us know what you would

1273
00:59:15,200 --> 00:59:18,800
Speaker 5: do in the comments. As Op says, my friend started

1274
00:59:18,840 --> 00:59:21,439
Speaker 5: off as a budget bride, which is okay. I don't

1275
00:59:21,440 --> 00:59:24,240
Speaker 5: blame her in this economy. Frankly, I told her I'd

1276
00:59:24,240 --> 00:59:26,040
Speaker 5: be willing to give up the invites to the wedding,

1277
00:59:26,120 --> 00:59:29,200
Speaker 5: as she knew she probably couldn't afford a large wedding

1278
00:59:29,440 --> 00:59:32,280
Speaker 5: that was also as picturesque as she had envisioned without

1279
00:59:32,280 --> 00:59:35,040
Speaker 5: cutting down the guest list. She said, no, no, no,

1280
00:59:35,080 --> 00:59:37,840
Speaker 5: of course, you're invited. In fact, could you do photography

1281
00:59:37,840 --> 00:59:39,800
Speaker 5: since I know you dabble in it as a hobby.

1282
00:59:40,440 --> 00:59:42,960
Speaker 5: I agreed to be her friender in exchange for not

1283
00:59:43,000 --> 00:59:45,720
Speaker 5: giving a gift, since I just lost my job as well.

1284
00:59:45,920 --> 00:59:48,280
Speaker 5: She knows I did, and I had to temporarily meet

1285
00:59:48,280 --> 00:59:52,120
Speaker 5: on unemployment. But soon enough the request started to pile up.

1286
00:59:52,320 --> 00:59:54,920
Speaker 5: It started with the innocuous, Oh, can you run an

1287
00:59:55,040 --> 00:59:58,280
Speaker 5: errand for me for XYZ for the wedding? Then can

1288
00:59:58,320 --> 01:00:00,840
Speaker 5: I use your apartment to store x ye for the wedding?

1289
01:00:01,120 --> 01:00:03,080
Speaker 5: Could you give me x y Z for the wedding?

1290
01:00:03,200 --> 01:00:05,200
Speaker 5: Finally I hit the tipping point to here where I'm

1291
01:00:05,280 --> 01:00:08,640
Speaker 5: ranting on Reddit because she started complaining about how expensive

1292
01:00:08,640 --> 01:00:11,400
Speaker 5: the wedding would be and is insisting on inviting one

1293
01:00:11,440 --> 01:00:15,840
Speaker 5: hundred guests. Then again she can't actually afford, and complaining

1294
01:00:15,840 --> 01:00:18,560
Speaker 5: how it's going to cost her two dollars a person

1295
01:00:18,640 --> 01:00:21,080
Speaker 5: to get crackers and cheese for the reception. Did I

1296
01:00:21,160 --> 01:00:24,680
Speaker 5: mention she also wants everyone else with an actual job

1297
01:00:24,720 --> 01:00:26,600
Speaker 5: to take time off for the wedding to be on

1298
01:00:26,640 --> 01:00:30,320
Speaker 5: a Thursday because it was more affordable, and Friday for

1299
01:00:30,360 --> 01:00:34,680
Speaker 5: her cheap but after party, nobody I know what's planning

1300
01:00:34,720 --> 01:00:37,200
Speaker 5: on going because every close friend who heard about this

1301
01:00:37,360 --> 01:00:40,920
Speaker 5: inconvenient and cheap wedding from her nose, the wedding itself

1302
01:00:40,960 --> 01:00:43,280
Speaker 5: is going to suck already. She then also sent me

1303
01:00:43,320 --> 01:00:45,720
Speaker 5: a long butt list of what would be worth four

1304
01:00:45,760 --> 01:00:48,720
Speaker 5: hours of wedding photography, which I told her I'd come

1305
01:00:48,760 --> 01:00:51,160
Speaker 5: in two hours before the ceremony to just take some

1306
01:00:51,200 --> 01:00:54,200
Speaker 5: shots of the family's and wedding party. And that's it.

1307
01:00:54,840 --> 01:00:57,840
Speaker 5: Oh in her wedding registry, no item on their wish

1308
01:00:57,840 --> 01:01:01,040
Speaker 5: list created by her solely she wouldn't let her to

1309
01:01:01,120 --> 01:01:04,760
Speaker 5: be fiance put in anything is below five hundred dollars.

1310
01:01:05,240 --> 01:01:08,400
Speaker 5: I've never been more disgusted with the amount of sheer, greediness,

1311
01:01:08,640 --> 01:01:11,080
Speaker 5: and self absorption of this friend, and it's making me

1312
01:01:11,160 --> 01:01:14,400
Speaker 5: reconsider our friendship. There are some comments, so let us

1313
01:01:14,440 --> 01:01:18,320
Speaker 5: get into them. Comment one, take this as an lesson

1314
01:01:18,400 --> 01:01:20,880
Speaker 5: to never be a friend er again. Sure, it's really

1315
01:01:20,960 --> 01:01:23,240
Speaker 5: kind what you are doing, but your friend is clearly

1316
01:01:23,280 --> 01:01:26,320
Speaker 5: taking advantage in using friends and family as free labor

1317
01:01:26,400 --> 01:01:29,240
Speaker 5: to make her wedding dreams happen. Your best bet is

1318
01:01:29,280 --> 01:01:32,440
Speaker 5: to set solid boundaries and manage expectations. You're not a

1319
01:01:32,440 --> 01:01:36,040
Speaker 5: professional photographer, you will only be taking photos between X

1320
01:01:36,120 --> 01:01:38,880
Speaker 5: o'clock and WI o'clock. You're still a guest and will

1321
01:01:38,920 --> 01:01:41,480
Speaker 5: be enjoying the wedding and not working it the whole time.

1322
01:01:41,600 --> 01:01:43,680
Speaker 5: If your friend has an issue with that, then I

1323
01:01:43,680 --> 01:01:46,640
Speaker 5: would opt out of attending. They can, and probably should,

1324
01:01:46,640 --> 01:01:50,600
Speaker 5: put some money towards a professional photographer. I know it's expensive,

1325
01:01:50,880 --> 01:01:52,960
Speaker 5: but then at least the bride would be getting exactly

1326
01:01:53,000 --> 01:01:55,760
Speaker 5: what they agree upon in their contract. I worry she'll

1327
01:01:55,800 --> 01:01:58,240
Speaker 5: be disappointed with the photos. Even if you do an

1328
01:01:58,280 --> 01:02:02,920
Speaker 5: amazing job, people will unreasonable expectations, often are unhappy with things,

1329
01:02:03,200 --> 01:02:07,120
Speaker 5: even if you go above and beyond comment too. I

1330
01:02:07,160 --> 01:02:10,000
Speaker 5: once photographed the coworker's wedding for free when I was

1331
01:02:10,080 --> 01:02:13,480
Speaker 5: just getting started. I learned after she used the savings

1332
01:02:13,760 --> 01:02:16,760
Speaker 5: from the photography to buy a five hundred dollars cake

1333
01:02:16,960 --> 01:02:19,880
Speaker 5: ope I offered when I had an actual, well paying

1334
01:02:20,000 --> 01:02:22,360
Speaker 5: job before I lost it. I lost it, and she

1335
01:02:22,600 --> 01:02:27,240
Speaker 5: was just like, oh, that's so terrible by my wedding

1336
01:02:27,280 --> 01:02:30,920
Speaker 5: fetes he promised to do for free. In her mind,

1337
01:02:30,960 --> 01:02:34,760
Speaker 5: now I have so much free time since losing my job,

1338
01:02:34,800 --> 01:02:37,800
Speaker 5: I should have plenty of time to learn how to

1339
01:02:37,840 --> 01:02:41,720
Speaker 5: take good photos. So the reply was, you know she's

1340
01:02:41,760 --> 01:02:44,200
Speaker 5: going to expect those photos to look like they're taken

1341
01:02:44,320 --> 01:02:47,840
Speaker 5: by a professional with decades of experience, and any comment

1342
01:02:47,880 --> 01:02:50,440
Speaker 5: for me about never having taken wedding photos before will

1343
01:02:50,480 --> 01:02:53,800
Speaker 5: be met with. But you had all this time to practice.

1344
01:02:54,880 --> 01:02:56,560
Speaker 5: If you do decide to go ahead with this, I

1345
01:02:56,560 --> 01:02:59,960
Speaker 5: would expect that the friendship will not survive. I wouldn't

1346
01:03:00,160 --> 01:03:02,400
Speaker 5: surprised of any problems that come up during the wedding.

1347
01:03:02,720 --> 01:03:05,240
Speaker 5: And you know this wedding is going to be a disaster.

1348
01:03:05,880 --> 01:03:09,840
Speaker 5: She'll blame you because no good deed goes unpunished. Comment three.

1349
01:03:10,640 --> 01:03:12,360
Speaker 5: She should wait a year or two to save up

1350
01:03:12,400 --> 01:03:14,800
Speaker 5: and get the wedding she wants instead of relying on

1351
01:03:14,800 --> 01:03:17,520
Speaker 5: people's kindness. Who even has the time to deal with

1352
01:03:17,560 --> 01:03:21,000
Speaker 5: other people's problems, you op said. I told her to

1353
01:03:21,040 --> 01:03:25,280
Speaker 5: either downsize that wedding to immediate family, get married, move in,

1354
01:03:25,480 --> 01:03:28,960
Speaker 5: then have a bigger party later, like people during the

1355
01:03:29,040 --> 01:03:32,360
Speaker 5: VID did they's like VID couples, Or to move in

1356
01:03:32,400 --> 01:03:35,280
Speaker 5: with her now fiance and save up for the party later,

1357
01:03:35,680 --> 01:03:38,080
Speaker 5: or to have taken her parents offered to live rent

1358
01:03:38,120 --> 01:03:41,200
Speaker 5: free at their house. She literally lives ten minutes away

1359
01:03:41,200 --> 01:03:44,040
Speaker 5: in the same town of her parents. Her parents said

1360
01:03:44,200 --> 01:03:47,439
Speaker 5: they wouldn't charge her rent or food bills, so she'd

1361
01:03:47,440 --> 01:03:49,600
Speaker 5: have been able to pocket four hundred dollars a month

1362
01:03:49,640 --> 01:03:51,800
Speaker 5: for the wedding since the beginning of the year. When

1363
01:03:51,840 --> 01:03:54,480
Speaker 5: she got engaged from her gig work. Her dad finds

1364
01:03:54,480 --> 01:03:57,400
Speaker 5: her and from their side hustle. There is an update

1365
01:03:57,560 --> 01:04:00,000
Speaker 5: just to quickly reply to the Oh, have you communicated

1366
01:04:00,200 --> 01:04:03,360
Speaker 5: to her about this? Yeah, we've had our squabbles about

1367
01:04:03,400 --> 01:04:06,439
Speaker 5: her overstepping boundaries. About two years ago, she broke into

1368
01:04:06,480 --> 01:04:10,160
Speaker 5: my apartment to impress some peers with a Bluetooth boombox

1369
01:04:10,200 --> 01:04:13,880
Speaker 5: I owned, just to help herself because I'd given her

1370
01:04:13,880 --> 01:04:16,080
Speaker 5: a spare key in the past to take care of

1371
01:04:16,120 --> 01:04:18,320
Speaker 5: my cats whenever I'm out of town. That's not an

1372
01:04:18,360 --> 01:04:21,360
Speaker 5: open invitation, no, no, but one, if things were going

1373
01:04:21,360 --> 01:04:23,800
Speaker 5: on in that apartment, yea, what if? What if there

1374
01:04:23,840 --> 01:04:27,760
Speaker 5: was like a business meeting, any or something else going on,

1375
01:04:28,040 --> 01:04:32,320
Speaker 5: or I don't know, they were summoning demons. You released

1376
01:04:32,360 --> 01:04:33,240
Speaker 5: out of demons.

1377
01:04:33,400 --> 01:04:37,160
Speaker 6: Yeah, you released the demons. That's your fault. If if

1378
01:04:38,000 --> 01:04:40,880
Speaker 6: she was not apologetic after that, this doesn't seem like

1379
01:04:40,880 --> 01:04:43,800
Speaker 6: an apologetic person. Fress I would I would cut back

1380
01:04:43,800 --> 01:04:43,960
Speaker 6: on that.

1381
01:04:44,280 --> 01:04:46,920
Speaker 5: Yeah. I don't think that there was an apology afterwards.

1382
01:04:46,960 --> 01:04:50,560
Speaker 5: I feel like there was. You gave me the key. Yeah, afterwards,

1383
01:04:51,880 --> 01:04:54,960
Speaker 5: I would not have been at this person's wedding. I

1384
01:04:54,960 --> 01:04:58,440
Speaker 5: would not even have offered free services. I would have

1385
01:04:58,440 --> 01:05:00,760
Speaker 5: been like, hey, I'll charge you f fifty percent of

1386
01:05:00,760 --> 01:05:03,000
Speaker 5: what I normally get. Yeah, as a gift to you,

1387
01:05:03,880 --> 01:05:05,920
Speaker 5: but I'm not giving that you for free.

1388
01:05:06,160 --> 01:05:06,560
Speaker 6: Agreed.

1389
01:05:06,880 --> 01:05:08,800
Speaker 5: I was working from home at the time at a

1390
01:05:08,840 --> 01:05:12,080
Speaker 5: remote call center, and she tried sneaking in because I

1391
01:05:12,200 --> 01:05:15,000
Speaker 5: was in a walk in closet and gambled. I wouldn't

1392
01:05:15,040 --> 01:05:18,120
Speaker 5: hear her or couldn't leave because I'd be with a customer. No,

1393
01:05:18,200 --> 01:05:20,800
Speaker 5: if someone breaks into my house, I'm saying, hey, someone's

1394
01:05:20,800 --> 01:05:21,720
Speaker 5: breaking into my house.

1395
01:05:21,800 --> 01:05:24,800
Speaker 6: Yeah, pause real quick, this is an issue I'm gonna

1396
01:05:24,840 --> 01:05:27,640
Speaker 6: be breaking. Yeah, I have a robber in.

1397
01:05:27,560 --> 01:05:29,720
Speaker 5: My I'm calling the police right now.

1398
01:05:30,040 --> 01:05:30,600
Speaker 4: Yeah.

1399
01:05:30,680 --> 01:05:33,000
Speaker 5: Wow, that's wild, that's right.

1400
01:05:33,120 --> 01:05:35,640
Speaker 6: Imagine like you're on a call, you're on a business call,

1401
01:05:35,680 --> 01:05:38,480
Speaker 6: someone breaks in your house. You're like, could you break him?

1402
01:05:38,520 --> 01:05:40,040
Speaker 5: Later you came back, I'm on a call.

1403
01:05:40,600 --> 01:05:41,240
Speaker 6: That's crazy.

1404
01:05:41,320 --> 01:05:43,720
Speaker 5: I knew exactly what she would do, because first she

1405
01:05:43,760 --> 01:05:46,360
Speaker 5: sent me a text to ask, and I decided I'd

1406
01:05:46,400 --> 01:05:50,120
Speaker 5: test her and ignoreant and not respond, excuse myself from work,

1407
01:05:50,160 --> 01:05:52,600
Speaker 5: then just waited behind the front door for ten minutes,

1408
01:05:52,880 --> 01:05:55,560
Speaker 5: and then lo and behold, look who was slowly turning

1409
01:05:55,560 --> 01:05:58,200
Speaker 5: the key in the front door to just help themselves

1410
01:05:58,240 --> 01:06:01,480
Speaker 5: without permission to the boombox. You should have seen the

1411
01:06:01,520 --> 01:06:04,160
Speaker 5: expression on her face when I jerked open the door

1412
01:06:04,320 --> 01:06:06,960
Speaker 5: and was shaking with rage, demanding to ask her what

1413
01:06:07,200 --> 01:06:10,520
Speaker 5: she thought she was doing. Her excuse of an apology

1414
01:06:10,600 --> 01:06:13,320
Speaker 5: was because I didn't say no, and she couldn't tell

1415
01:06:13,360 --> 01:06:15,800
Speaker 5: whether or not I'd read or not read her text

1416
01:06:15,800 --> 01:06:19,000
Speaker 5: request and didn't respond explicitly with an answer that it

1417
01:06:19,080 --> 01:06:21,440
Speaker 5: was a yes. I told her back then a non

1418
01:06:21,480 --> 01:06:24,440
Speaker 5: response for me is as good as a no. I

1419
01:06:24,480 --> 01:06:26,680
Speaker 5: had to then pay to change the locks and get

1420
01:06:26,760 --> 01:06:29,680
Speaker 5: new keys to the apartment two years ago, because I

1421
01:06:29,760 --> 01:06:32,840
Speaker 5: knew she'd be a menace. I told her exactly how

1422
01:06:32,960 --> 01:06:35,760
Speaker 5: violating it is to break and enter my apartment without

1423
01:06:35,800 --> 01:06:38,800
Speaker 5: being invited over and she deflected it and said I

1424
01:06:38,800 --> 01:06:42,040
Speaker 5: have no right to use the word violating because it

1425
01:06:42,080 --> 01:06:45,800
Speaker 5: triggers her anxiety since she had an awful childhood, and

1426
01:06:45,840 --> 01:06:48,680
Speaker 5: what she did was a simple mistake versus her past.

1427
01:06:49,040 --> 01:06:49,960
Speaker 5: That's gaslighting.

1428
01:06:50,080 --> 01:06:54,000
Speaker 6: Yes, that's extreme gasing. What do you mean you're a

1429
01:06:54,440 --> 01:06:55,479
Speaker 6: mean for breaking into your.

1430
01:06:55,400 --> 01:06:56,960
Speaker 5: Hot You can't use the word violating.

1431
01:06:57,360 --> 01:07:00,280
Speaker 6: It's not violating because I said so.

1432
01:07:00,280 --> 01:07:02,840
Speaker 5: Because I had a bad experience with a violet crayon. Yeah,

1433
01:07:03,000 --> 01:07:04,120
Speaker 5: and it sounds the same.

1434
01:07:03,960 --> 01:07:06,680
Speaker 6: And it sounds really similar, and it's it's honestly triggering me.

1435
01:07:07,280 --> 01:07:10,680
Speaker 5: This isn't so like not anyone's PTSD. But this girl is.

1436
01:07:11,200 --> 01:07:15,200
Speaker 5: I doubt she has something like that. She's just gaslighting

1437
01:07:15,240 --> 01:07:17,320
Speaker 5: and this is this is not a good person.

1438
01:07:17,600 --> 01:07:17,920
Speaker 6: Yeah.

1439
01:07:17,960 --> 01:07:20,080
Speaker 5: On top of offering to do the photos and somehow

1440
01:07:20,120 --> 01:07:23,080
Speaker 5: figure out something for the ceremony, but I've contributed in

1441
01:07:23,200 --> 01:07:27,440
Speaker 5: addition o party decorations, I've had fabricat head on hand

1442
01:07:27,560 --> 01:07:32,400
Speaker 5: that coincidentally worked for her wedding theme, big plastic disposable

1443
01:07:32,440 --> 01:07:36,240
Speaker 5: platters for the Ritz crackers and cheese. She'll be spreading

1444
01:07:36,280 --> 01:07:40,040
Speaker 5: thinly over them and placing carefully one on each table.

1445
01:07:40,040 --> 01:07:42,360
Speaker 5: Oh my god, she's not even using like good crackers.

1446
01:07:42,360 --> 01:07:45,520
Speaker 5: She's using Ritz crackers, which are delicious but are not

1447
01:07:45,640 --> 01:07:46,560
Speaker 5: wedding crackers.

1448
01:07:46,600 --> 01:07:49,680
Speaker 6: Seems like she's just using like five Ritz crackers per se,

1449
01:07:49,840 --> 01:07:53,200
Speaker 6: creezy cheese, yeah, little spread cheese.

1450
01:07:53,520 --> 01:07:56,880
Speaker 5: I love Ritz crackers. I will happily eat. I have

1451
01:07:57,000 --> 01:07:59,480
Speaker 5: some Ritz crackers right now, but I don't serve that

1452
01:07:59,560 --> 01:07:59,960
Speaker 5: at a way.

1453
01:08:00,760 --> 01:08:02,000
Speaker 2: There's better crackers.

1454
01:08:02,200 --> 01:08:05,560
Speaker 5: You can, like go to a grocery outlet, bargain market

1455
01:08:05,560 --> 01:08:07,240
Speaker 5: if you have them, or something like it. They have

1456
01:08:07,320 --> 01:08:11,360
Speaker 5: discount crackers that are fancy crackers, but they're on discount

1457
01:08:11,440 --> 01:08:15,080
Speaker 5: because they weren't bought yet and they're still good, they're

1458
01:08:15,200 --> 01:08:19,040
Speaker 5: still delicious, They're still more fit for your wedding than

1459
01:08:19,560 --> 01:08:20,599
Speaker 5: these Ritz crackers.

1460
01:08:20,960 --> 01:08:22,759
Speaker 6: More update way to prepare for a wedding.

1461
01:08:22,800 --> 01:08:25,360
Speaker 5: Oh, absolutely, you can learn from these people's experience.

1462
01:08:25,479 --> 01:08:28,200
Speaker 6: Yeah yeah, right before you go into a wedding. You're like, well,

1463
01:08:28,200 --> 01:08:29,680
Speaker 6: I know what I'm not doing tonight.

1464
01:08:29,439 --> 01:08:30,519
Speaker 5: Oh not buying Ritz crackers.

1465
01:08:30,960 --> 01:08:34,000
Speaker 6: M well, we got a little bit left.

1466
01:08:33,760 --> 01:08:36,719
Speaker 5: But thought so as wedding.

1467
01:08:37,280 --> 01:08:41,800
Speaker 6: Yeah, yeah, I'm not friends with this person anymore. That's it.

1468
01:08:42,240 --> 01:08:45,519
Speaker 6: I'm like, I'm fed up with her. I'm saying, by

1469
01:08:46,280 --> 01:08:49,040
Speaker 6: you could figure out your wedding for yourself. Maybe I

1470
01:08:49,120 --> 01:08:51,200
Speaker 6: still go to the wedding, maybe, but I'm certainly not

1471
01:08:51,240 --> 01:08:52,080
Speaker 6: helping with anything.

1472
01:08:52,160 --> 01:08:54,799
Speaker 5: Yeah, if you still feel the need to take photos.

1473
01:08:54,840 --> 01:08:55,800
Speaker 5: You take the photos, but you.

1474
01:08:55,760 --> 01:08:59,960
Speaker 6: Don't have Yeah, yeah, ed don't. You're not being paid

1475
01:09:00,200 --> 01:09:00,800
Speaker 6: not editing them.

1476
01:09:00,880 --> 01:09:03,120
Speaker 5: I said I would take the photos. I didn't say

1477
01:09:03,280 --> 01:09:05,160
Speaker 5: to edit the photos because that takes a long time,

1478
01:09:05,200 --> 01:09:08,880
Speaker 5: a lot, because you have to sort through how many

1479
01:09:08,880 --> 01:09:09,639
Speaker 5: photos you're taking.

1480
01:09:09,680 --> 01:09:11,200
Speaker 6: Like, I know a lot of the price comes from

1481
01:09:11,240 --> 01:09:12,000
Speaker 6: wedding vis Yeah.

1482
01:09:12,000 --> 01:09:15,479
Speaker 5: First, I know a lot of wedding photographers who they

1483
01:09:15,560 --> 01:09:17,120
Speaker 5: took it up as a hobby and now they're making

1484
01:09:17,160 --> 01:09:20,440
Speaker 5: money from it. They take thousands of photos at a wedding. Yeah,

1485
01:09:20,640 --> 01:09:21,400
Speaker 5: like you.

1486
01:09:21,400 --> 01:09:23,840
Speaker 6: Have to sort someone's friend.

1487
01:09:24,120 --> 01:09:26,320
Speaker 5: Yes, exactly. You want to do a good job, so

1488
01:09:26,360 --> 01:09:28,760
Speaker 5: you take thousands of photos. You have to sort through

1489
01:09:28,760 --> 01:09:31,519
Speaker 5: the good ones, send them to them, do the edits,

1490
01:09:31,760 --> 01:09:37,240
Speaker 5: then send them back. And it's just so much. So

1491
01:09:37,600 --> 01:09:40,799
Speaker 5: update time she's shown me her wedding budget, I've hosted

1492
01:09:40,800 --> 01:09:43,240
Speaker 5: friends parties in the past, and I already pointed out

1493
01:09:43,280 --> 01:09:45,439
Speaker 5: to her she needs to use the rule of six

1494
01:09:45,439 --> 01:09:48,639
Speaker 5: ounces of protein per person, or like twelve to fifteen

1495
01:09:48,680 --> 01:09:51,559
Speaker 5: pieces at least accounted per person as a general rule

1496
01:09:51,560 --> 01:09:55,040
Speaker 5: of thumb if you're only serving appetizers. She only laughed

1497
01:09:55,080 --> 01:09:57,720
Speaker 5: at me and said, well, that's the idea. If I

1498
01:09:57,840 --> 01:10:00,599
Speaker 5: starve everyone, they'll have to go out and buy foods

1499
01:10:00,600 --> 01:10:03,679
Speaker 5: somewhere else. I also provided envelopes I had on hand

1500
01:10:03,680 --> 01:10:06,320
Speaker 5: for her wedding invites and cleaning up after her for

1501
01:10:06,400 --> 01:10:08,840
Speaker 5: when she wanted to use all my available pots and

1502
01:10:08,880 --> 01:10:13,720
Speaker 5: pans for her solo wood flowers. There are comments why

1503
01:10:13,760 --> 01:10:15,519
Speaker 5: would you keep a friend who you know will break

1504
01:10:15,560 --> 01:10:17,800
Speaker 5: into your home and steal from you. She's not a

1505
01:10:17,800 --> 01:10:20,040
Speaker 5: little kid who made a mistake. She's a thieving adult

1506
01:10:20,160 --> 01:10:22,600
Speaker 5: who isn't going to change. She's going to continue to

1507
01:10:22,600 --> 01:10:24,479
Speaker 5: be horrible to you for as long as you allow

1508
01:10:24,520 --> 01:10:28,479
Speaker 5: her to cut her loose. The op posted and was

1509
01:10:28,520 --> 01:10:31,880
Speaker 5: downloaded at the time. My boyfriend preached to me, I

1510
01:10:31,920 --> 01:10:34,800
Speaker 5: shouldn't because we're all going to Universal and I should

1511
01:10:34,880 --> 01:10:38,800
Speaker 5: practice forgiveness at the time, and I had paid for

1512
01:10:38,840 --> 01:10:41,800
Speaker 5: her Universal ticket and it would be too awkward to

1513
01:10:41,840 --> 01:10:44,920
Speaker 5: swap out the ticket's name with hers. Comment number two,

1514
01:10:45,000 --> 01:10:48,200
Speaker 5: why are you friends with this person at all? She's

1515
01:10:48,200 --> 01:10:50,280
Speaker 5: broken into your apartment and it sounds like that is

1516
01:10:50,439 --> 01:10:54,960
Speaker 5: just one of many things. Another comment, this is on you.

1517
01:10:55,320 --> 01:10:57,760
Speaker 5: She's an energy vampire and you should have broken up

1518
01:10:57,800 --> 01:11:01,120
Speaker 5: with her a long time Ago, a true Colin Robinson.

1519
01:11:00,920 --> 01:11:06,360
Speaker 6: Yes, Colin Robinson well being an energy vampire, much like.

1520
01:11:06,439 --> 01:11:08,680
Speaker 5: What we do in the shadows, we never know. We

1521
01:11:08,760 --> 01:11:11,160
Speaker 5: won't see what these people do in the shadows, because

1522
01:11:11,160 --> 01:11:12,200
Speaker 5: that's the end of that story.