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Speaker 1: Lisa Lampanelli is not a licensed therapist or life coach.

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Speaker 1: She is a meddling advice giving yana and know it all,

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Speaker 1: and her words come from her head, her heart, and

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Speaker 1: often out of her ass. This podcast should not be

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Speaker 1: misconstrued as therapy. I should be taking with a huge

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Speaker 1: grain of salt for entertainment purposes. Only these.

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Speaker 2: You need help, You're the problems. Come on, come on, gollam,

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Speaker 2: take a pill.

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Speaker 3: I think you're insane.

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Speaker 2: Do what I said, dumb ass.

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Speaker 3: Listen to me, you god that song. It's the essence

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Speaker 3: of my being.

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Speaker 4: I am sweet and lovely Lisa, and welcome to Shrink

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Speaker 4: This with Lisa Lampinelli, the podcast that teaches you how

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Speaker 4: to live. But absolutely you should not take any of

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Speaker 4: the advice. You should ignore us. But wait, I'm going

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Speaker 4: to start over. I'm going to start over. I think

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Speaker 4: you should listen to us. I'm not starting over because

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Speaker 4: I'm not afraid to have been vulnerable and human, Unlike

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Speaker 4: you people, I put myself out there. I make the

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Speaker 4: mistakes on air, and damn it, we're keeping them on.

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Speaker 4: So Celia, you control freak people. Pleasing twat, don't you.

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Speaker 3: Edit a thing?

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Speaker 4: It's Lisa Warts and All on Shrink This with Lisa Leipadelli,

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Speaker 4: the podcast where we give you advice and I think

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Speaker 4: you should listen, And I'm here with my brilliant.

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Speaker 3: Sidekick, Nick Scibility. Yeah, I have to mood like I am.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, I'm a little I drove in today, so it

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Speaker 5: required more focus.

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Speaker 3: I don't like that.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, I think I may never do it again. It

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Speaker 5: was nice today. Anybody feel listen.

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Speaker 4: To you Boom podcast over and over and here how

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Speaker 4: great you are, which is not what I did. I

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Speaker 4: made the mistake on the drive of listening. You have

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Speaker 4: to be careful of what you intake. Correct and guess

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Speaker 4: what I in took today on my drive cooking. No,

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Speaker 4: never Sackerys and they're not a sponsor. Fuck them because

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Speaker 4: they never sent me anything free.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, but I made the mistake of listening to a

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Speaker 3: two parter on a cult escapee.

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Speaker 4: Now, this is a depressing subject, so you gotta I

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Speaker 4: gotta be careful and monitor what I'm listening to.

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Speaker 3: Did you did? Did you listen to something harrowing? Also?

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Speaker 5: No, just music at a low volume.

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Speaker 3: See that's better.

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Speaker 5: What was the cult?

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Speaker 4: Oh, fundamentalist Christian cult? And it was such a great podcast.

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Speaker 4: And of course after episode one, I noticed my neck

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Speaker 4: really hurts and my back hurts, and I'm tense and

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Speaker 4: I just can't wait for I'm like, I'm not listening

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Speaker 4: to episode two, but you have to because episode two

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Speaker 4: is the one where she escapes, because I want to

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Speaker 4: have some hope that she escaped. And then she escaped

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Speaker 4: and it wasn't worth the payoff?

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Speaker 5: Why not? Wasn't good?

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Speaker 3: I mean it was great, but it still made me depressed.

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Speaker 4: I'm like, bitch, how you get involved with that shit

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Speaker 4: in the first place.

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Speaker 3: Nobody's trying to put me in a call. You know

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Speaker 3: what I'm saying.

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Speaker 5: I feel you. She escaped and now she works here.

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Speaker 5: What's up Celia?

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Speaker 3: Oh she's.

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Speaker 4: Our former trad wife, Celia Seljia.

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Speaker 3: I could I just call you Selja to give it

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Speaker 3: a Hispanic flare? Absolutely? I enjoy that. Yes, you know

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Speaker 3: that's that's actually a Hispanic name.

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Speaker 4: Well listen, don't be racist, all right, stop being racist.

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Speaker 5: She escapes the racist I know well.

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Speaker 3: That that happens.

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Speaker 4: That's the trajectory of all of them. But I love

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Speaker 4: how our podcast starts off as being one thing and

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Speaker 4: now it's not about anything I decided, I'm really exhausted

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Speaker 4: after one episode.

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Speaker 3: I'm quitting. It's it's it people. I hope you enjoy

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Speaker 3: our two parter about escaping I escaped the cult.

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Speaker 4: Of Elvis durand I did. He said to me, do

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Speaker 4: a podcast, and I said, damn you.

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Speaker 3: I'll do two. Two episodes that is, but I'm bumped.

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Speaker 4: No sound effects guy, I don't get a sound effects

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Speaker 4: guy effects.

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Speaker 3: No cool button.

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Speaker 4: I wish I could at least the penis sound.

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Speaker 3: I want to hear that.

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Speaker 5: Week.

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Speaker 3: Please. Of course I'll get a button just for it,

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Speaker 3: like a.

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Speaker 4: Little splurt, even though I haven't heard a splurt in

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Speaker 4: a while. Thank god, I right now listen. Speaking of

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Speaker 4: not splurting. That's our subject today because we got a

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Speaker 4: lot of letters about people who well, I will actually

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Speaker 4: preface this with a story of my own me personally,

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Speaker 4: I feel like I have a strong belief that the

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Speaker 4: worst thing that happened in my life was I got

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Speaker 4: the flu. But not for the reasons you will think

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Speaker 4: it is. Once you get the flu, oh my god,

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Speaker 4: you get to have a loane time. It's like forced

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Speaker 4: by yourself. You're with your three little dogs, You're on

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Speaker 4: a couch, you're laying a certain way, and yes you're

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Speaker 4: shitting and throwing up, but it's a small price to

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Speaker 4: pay for the fact that you can't lift your head up.

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Speaker 4: No one will call you, you don't have to respond

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Speaker 4: to anything. So I had such forced alone time for

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Speaker 4: like a week that I was like, oh shit, now

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Speaker 4: I want it all the time. I'm fantasizing about the flu.

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Speaker 4: So that's not good. It just shows me I shouldn't

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Speaker 4: have to get sick, like literally sick and sick and

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Speaker 4: tired of being sick and tired got it like we

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Speaker 4: It just shouldn't have to be sick to take the

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Speaker 4: time to not respond to anybody and to just be

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Speaker 4: by myself.

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Speaker 3: Can you relate to this?

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Speaker 5: In September I got COVID.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, and I was home.

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Speaker 5: For five days.

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Speaker 3: Best days of your life.

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Speaker 5: And by the once like the fever and the shaking

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Speaker 5: and the chills went.

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Speaker 3: Yeah.

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Speaker 5: I was like looking like lightly looking at work from

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Speaker 5: home jobs. I was like, this is nice.

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Speaker 4: It's hard though, because you're a personal trainer who could

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Speaker 4: be found at by the way Nick scopes what is it?

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Speaker 3: And what on?

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Speaker 5: All on all the plant and all.

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Speaker 4: The stupid things. They're also yeah, Farmers only all trad wives.

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Speaker 4: You could be a tradi dot com. Yeah, Brandos only

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Speaker 4: dot com. But like, isn't it just the best to

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Speaker 4: not have to deal with? But also it's because do

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Speaker 4: you think it's because we frontload our lives so much,

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Speaker 4: with so much to do, that we drive ourselves to

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Speaker 4: need alone time. When we all wes should do is

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Speaker 4: admit we need it and then we don't have to

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Speaker 4: get sick.

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Speaker 3: To take it. It's ridiculous.

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Speaker 4: It's like, what's the point, what's the point of this

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Speaker 4: driving and striving and doing more. I wrote an entire

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Speaker 4: play last year about doing less and I don't. And

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Speaker 4: by the way, writing a play is a lot of work,

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Speaker 4: so you do more inherently.

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Speaker 3: But once I'm done with this play, I'll do less.

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Speaker 4: And it's like, wow, what was the lesson in writing

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Speaker 4: seventy five pages of do less? It was that I'm

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Speaker 4: still doing too much. And it's not by anybody else's

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Speaker 4: else's standards. It's not as much as a mom with kids,

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Speaker 4: or as much as a guy who's running around and

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Speaker 4: like dating or doing this and has a job.

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Speaker 3: I just do too much for me.

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Speaker 4: I think I just don't admit that I need just

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Speaker 4: shutting off.

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Speaker 3: Sometimes I agree.

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Speaker 5: I you know, I go back and forth on this

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Speaker 5: subject all the time because I do love my alone time.

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Speaker 5: But at the same time, when I do take off

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Speaker 5: from work or I have time to myself, it's cool

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Speaker 5: for like an hour or two, or like a day

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Speaker 5: or two, and then I start to get like I

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Speaker 5: gotta do something yeah, or then even work. I know,

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Speaker 5: for me, like this week was a really busy week

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Speaker 5: for me, I'll get too comfortable, yes, and like I

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Speaker 5: almost like I got to rush through everything to get

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Speaker 5: to my downtime. It's like I struggle with this a lot.

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Speaker 5: I go back and forth, and I really don't know

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Speaker 5: what the answer is.

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Speaker 4: I don't know the answer because you would think by

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Speaker 4: my age sixty three, you know that they go proud

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Speaker 4: senior citizen. I'm a proud and I'm not a silver

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Speaker 4: single who let their hair go gray. Shut up fucking color.

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Speaker 3: Yeah anyway, I yeah.

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Speaker 4: It's like I don't want to tip into I heard

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Speaker 4: a quote I'm too old to act old. It's like

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Speaker 4: I don't want to tip into the old lady.

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Speaker 3: Who never leaves the shoe.

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Speaker 4: You never leave the house, because like old ladies when

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Speaker 4: they're eighty, there's a lot of them are super happy

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Speaker 4: to just stay home and they'll go to like church

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Speaker 4: and bingo.

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Speaker 3: And that was my mom.

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Speaker 4: She was like, twice out of the house a week

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Speaker 4: is enough, and like, yes, does she get to be

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Speaker 4: the judge of what's enough for her?

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Speaker 3: Yes?

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Speaker 4: But to me that feels scary. The idea of not

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Speaker 4: having something to do at least five six days a

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Speaker 4: week makes me feel like I'm going to tip into

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Speaker 4: the other extreme. So I think there's like the two extremes.

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Speaker 4: There's like the I need all the alone time and

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Speaker 4: I'm sorry, but guess I have no patience for and

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Speaker 4: I don't care if anybody even.

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Speaker 3: Hates me after this.

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Speaker 4: The I am socially anxious. I don't like going to parties.

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Speaker 4: Just ask me to go somewhere and I'll just say no.

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Speaker 4: It's like, well, then I'm glad you have no friends

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Speaker 4: dialogue exactly. There's that extreme, and then there's the oh

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Speaker 4: my god, I just have to do and do and

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Speaker 4: do and do. So I don't know where the balance

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Speaker 4: is only a parent when like we're sick, like when

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Speaker 4: we go, oh, I've finally balance it out. I had

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Speaker 4: three days at home to myself and now I get

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Speaker 4: to go three days out.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, now you don't have it. It's when you don't

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Speaker 5: have a choice. Yeah, I have to make the decision.

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Speaker 5: Because every time I've like been chilling and I've chose

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Speaker 5: to like go somewhere and do something, it's never been bad.

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Speaker 5: It's always been like, oh that was fun.

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Speaker 4: But also, you and I have this thing where we're

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Speaker 4: high energy, so we'll never go to a place.

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Speaker 3: And be half asked about it.

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Speaker 4: We're not I wouldn't say life of the party all

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Speaker 4: the time, but we'll bring it fully. We won't go

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Speaker 4: and go look, I'm just gonna like be mellow at

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Speaker 4: your house, Like if I don't bring the right energy,

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Speaker 4: like I'm sorry, No, we just go and we go

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Speaker 4: full out.

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Speaker 5: Yeah. I think I was just gonna say that. It's

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Speaker 5: trying to like we feel like we have to be on.

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Speaker 5: I know you can't just go and show up and

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Speaker 5: being because I've gone places a little MOPy or tired.

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Speaker 3: And they're like, what's wrong. You're usually okay, I'm Nick

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Speaker 3: you doing okay?

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Speaker 5: Yeah?

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Speaker 4: Nick?

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Speaker 3: I noticed something. Is it the fact that you own

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Speaker 3: have a girlfriend? Maybe is it the wake game?

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Speaker 4: Like they have to then plod and asked you what's wrong?

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Speaker 3: Like it's like, dude, I just was like being me.

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Speaker 4: Do you think actually we're even supposed to be up up,

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Speaker 4: up all the time when we're out in these situations

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Speaker 4: bringing ourselves as our true self might look different than

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Speaker 4: we think.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, I think, I mean, do you think that like people?

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Speaker 5: Because well, especially for you, like I know for me

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Speaker 5: and my friend group, but because you are who you are,

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Speaker 5: I think people expect you to be a certain way

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Speaker 5: when they meet you, and they're probably like if you

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Speaker 5: have any bit of lull that like you want to

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Speaker 5: be on and good to go, and you always show

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Speaker 5: up to shit, you don't. I never cancel, you never can.

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Speaker 3: I can't do two things.

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Speaker 4: And it was because it was way back a few

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Speaker 4: months ago over the holidays.

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Speaker 3: Because of again being sick.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, and when my dog Parker, like I mean it

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Speaker 4: was it's not a blessing, but like I went home

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Speaker 4: one day and like his two back legs were like

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Speaker 4: faced in like he's in a plea. He was in

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Speaker 4: position five ballet because he had like a disc problem.

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Speaker 4: And I was like, oh my god, I'm so sad

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Speaker 4: for the dog, and thank god it got fixed. I'm like,

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Speaker 4: oh my god, I get to stay home with him.

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Speaker 4: If you it is a true friend who will say yes,

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Speaker 4: stay home with your dog. And if they don't say yes,

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Speaker 4: stay home with your dog, then that's not a good friend.

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Speaker 4: You just cross them off the list. Ye.

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Speaker 3: So yeah, that it's like those.

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Speaker 4: Things converge and you're all of a sudden like, oh,

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Speaker 4: I'm allowed to stay home. Yeah I'm not bring that.

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Speaker 4: But but other than that, I rarely cancel.

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Speaker 5: That's never, but I even want to, like I find

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Speaker 5: this for our like our diner nights when it's like me,

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Speaker 5: you and the other two comics.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, we go together once a week and like talk.

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Speaker 4: We ostensibly started this as a writing group, but none

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Speaker 4: of us wants to write anything. Somebody's that we sit

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Speaker 4: around and make fun of the two Greek owners exactly.

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Speaker 5: And I always want but like for those times like

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Speaker 5: it should be chill, right, it just and it is chill.

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Speaker 5: It's so fun. I enjoy it. But I'm always like, oh,

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Speaker 5: maybe I should like take a nap before tonight, like

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Speaker 5: just to be ready, like because bring it, yeah, just

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Speaker 5: to bring it in and have fun and be good

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Speaker 5: to go, Like I always like make sure like I

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Speaker 5: like to, I get out of work early on Tuesdays,

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Speaker 5: go home, I chill, I have like dinner a little bit,

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Speaker 5: like a light dinner, and then I go to the diet,

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Speaker 5: like want to have a nice downtime, set.

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Speaker 3: It up nice.

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Speaker 5: Yeah before I hate that, I'm like that, but I'm like, oh,

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Speaker 5: I have a little downtime and then go.

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Speaker 3: It's weird.

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Speaker 4: But our other two guys, our other two friends, Bo

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Speaker 4: and Andrew, it is never questioned if either one of

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Speaker 4: them are in like sort of a down mood or

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Speaker 4: more mellow or whatever, because they're just allowed to be

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Speaker 4: full human beings. But I think me and you, it's

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Speaker 4: like we have to bring it. Yeah, And I don't

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Speaker 4: like that about myself. I love I would love to

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Speaker 4: be like boring. Yeah, And you know, people listening to

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Speaker 4: this podcast are like, you are, don't worry about it, no,

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Speaker 4: But I like want to be just with family. It's

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Speaker 4: tough too, because I have a family. One half of

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Speaker 4: my family is super heightened. My sister's side of the family.

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Speaker 4: They bring it there loud. They're always playing games, which

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Speaker 4: I love all that stuff.

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Speaker 3: So I feel this pressure that I'm going to be

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Speaker 3: the boring one, and they're going to be like, are

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Speaker 3: you okay? My sister?

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Speaker 4: I love her, her biggest heart in the world, but

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Speaker 4: the two things she says it drives me nuts.

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Speaker 3: Are are you okay?

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Speaker 4: And when I tell her something good happens, she goes,

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Speaker 4: good for you and like, I'm not the special needs

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Speaker 4: bagger at the grocery store, but a good for you

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Speaker 4: sounds very sort of insulting, but I don't. I know

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Speaker 4: she doesn't mean it that way. So but around family,

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Speaker 4: I feel like, oh, I have to present well. It's

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Speaker 4: so hard to even say I'm okay and have them

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Speaker 4: sort of accept it. So that's why I think the

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Speaker 4: alone time for us is like, oh wow, we get

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Speaker 4: to not pretend anything.

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Speaker 5: Yeah.

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Speaker 4: But the the other side of it is if I

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Speaker 4: go two days and realize I have not spoken words

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Speaker 4: out loud, like I've done that where I'm like, oh

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Speaker 4: my god, all I've said all day is who's a

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Speaker 4: good boy?

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Speaker 3: No, like who's a good boy, who's a good girl.

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Speaker 3: We're all trees.

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Speaker 4: To get my dog to Parker to come to me.

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Speaker 4: I have to trees, Like, you can't even say it

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Speaker 4: normalous They respond to like voice sounds I guess, And

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Speaker 4: I'm like, I have not spoken a word, and I

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Speaker 4: also like, just real quick, like, are you I think

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Speaker 4: we're both considered extroverts?

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Speaker 5: Correct, I guess, I.

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Speaker 4: Know, but I think we have a little, you know,

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Speaker 4: introverted need. Also like there's also a little need for

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Speaker 4: introversion sometimes, and we shouldn't drive ourselves into being ill

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Speaker 4: to get this job done. But yet, what's the fear

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Speaker 4: by the way of actually, okay, I'm feeling totally well,

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Speaker 4: I'm one hundred percent like right now we're taping the podcast.

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Speaker 4: I was in a terrible mood because of my back, neck,

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Speaker 4: thighs and other issues. But I said, you know what,

335
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Speaker 4: I got The podcast gets me in a good mood,

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Speaker 4: which proves extraversion.

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Speaker 3: I love that the energy is up.

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Speaker 4: But the idea of going home after and like just

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Speaker 4: canceling the dinner, oh god, it's even uncomfortable say I'm

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Speaker 4: canceling on a dinner.

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Speaker 3: I can't say. Two good friends, I love them.

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Speaker 4: I want one of them's leaving for Florida for like

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Speaker 4: months to do a show, so I'm like, oh yeah,

344
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Speaker 4: my last chance to see him before he goes the

345
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Speaker 4: idea of canceling it makes me so uncomfortable because the

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Speaker 4: story I tell in my head is I'm Lisa. I

347
00:16:31,400 --> 00:16:36,000
Speaker 4: don't cancel, but maybe I'm Lisa who sometimes has to cancel.

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Speaker 4: Like we construct these artificial identities for ourselves. Oh, I'm

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Speaker 4: the person who always dot dot dot. I'm the person

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Speaker 4: who always you know what, I shed one of those.

351
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Speaker 4: I'm the person who quote always brings something when I'm

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Speaker 4: invited to a party.

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Speaker 3: Fuck you.

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Speaker 4: You come to my house a lot and you never

355
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Speaker 4: bring anything. I'm not bringing anything to your house, so

356
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Speaker 4: I have to deconstruct. I'm always the person who shows up,

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Speaker 4: maybe to my detriment if I'm tired. So are you

358
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Speaker 4: a canceler ever?

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Speaker 3: Not really? I know you a lot.

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Speaker 5: More this small percentage, but I will tell you this,

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Speaker 5: I have a weird if I do cancel something, I

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Speaker 5: have this weird like almost like fomo.

363
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Speaker 3: Oh see you get that.

364
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Speaker 5: Not not fomo, but I'm like, the only thing that

365
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Speaker 5: I've canceled the most, probably honestly, is dates. Sometimes we're like,

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Speaker 5: I'm like, it's Friday night, or you said yes to

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Speaker 5: something earlier in the week and it's for me Friday night.

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Speaker 5: When it's Friday night and work's done, yeah, I don't

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Speaker 5: know what it is, but my body's.

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Speaker 4: Like, it's beautiful to stay on a Friday. It's doesn't

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Speaker 4: feel like you're cheating life. Also, I would say on

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Speaker 4: behalf of every girl you canceled on for dates, You've

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Speaker 4: done a service. They are thanking you. They've saved themselves

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Speaker 4: from getting not up from by some wap guinea bastard

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Speaker 4: who won't watch any shows say say I, no, don't

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Speaker 4: edit that.

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Speaker 3: I'm perfection.

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Speaker 5: I don't know about you, but there's times where I

379
00:18:04,760 --> 00:18:07,000
Speaker 5: look forward to a day where I don't have anything.

380
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Speaker 5: Love it right. The morning comes, it's slow, it's nice

381
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Speaker 5: the first few hours. Then I feel like I gotta

382
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Speaker 5: do something m and then I do something for a while,

383
00:18:19,160 --> 00:18:21,480
Speaker 5: and then the long story of it is it takes

384
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Speaker 5: me a while to settle in to do it. Yes, nothing.

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Speaker 5: And I want to know if you were the same

386
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Speaker 5: way or if you're like, nah, I'm chilling, because it

387
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Speaker 5: takes me, like to like three pm to be like, okay,

388
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Speaker 5: we can relax.

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Speaker 3: We will like settle into it.

390
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Speaker 5: To the day of doing like nothing, you know what

391
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Speaker 5: I mean, maybe an errand or two, but like, it

392
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Speaker 5: takes me a while to settle.

393
00:18:39,200 --> 00:18:41,359
Speaker 3: Yeah, I think I've just had more practice at it.

394
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Speaker 4: So when I get up, I don't even set that alarm,

395
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Speaker 4: and I'm just like, you get up. When you get up,

396
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Speaker 4: those freaking dogs will eat whenever I get to them.

397
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Speaker 3: Nobody's dying in this house. It's fine. So it doesn't

398
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Speaker 3: take me much settling in time anymore. But I remember

399
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Speaker 3: when I used to go on vacation.

400
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Speaker 4: There was this really fancy spot I used to go

401
00:19:00,680 --> 00:19:02,880
Speaker 4: to when I thought I was a big shot, and

402
00:19:02,920 --> 00:19:06,199
Speaker 4: they all said, it's gonna take you three days to

403
00:19:06,280 --> 00:19:08,960
Speaker 4: get into the mindset of this place, for you to

404
00:19:09,240 --> 00:19:11,400
Speaker 4: let go of work, for you, let go of your

405
00:19:11,520 --> 00:19:15,120
Speaker 4: like family obligations. So I see how that could translate

406
00:19:15,119 --> 00:19:17,160
Speaker 4: into just if you have one day, it's gonna take

407
00:19:17,200 --> 00:19:19,359
Speaker 4: you like a third of it just to gear up

408
00:19:19,400 --> 00:19:22,159
Speaker 4: into it. So my advice to you, even though you

409
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Speaker 4: didn't ask, because I'm always about giving advice when I'm

410
00:19:24,800 --> 00:19:30,760
Speaker 4: not asked, like, don't set the alarm and allow yourself

411
00:19:30,840 --> 00:19:33,960
Speaker 4: to if you know you know what, I'm gonna break this.

412
00:19:34,040 --> 00:19:36,879
Speaker 4: I'm gonna go like grab coffee. I'm gonna like go

413
00:19:36,920 --> 00:19:39,480
Speaker 4: to Duncan Dundas. I'm gonna go and you know, take

414
00:19:39,520 --> 00:19:41,880
Speaker 4: a walk, be like okay, well I'm allowed to do that.

415
00:19:42,240 --> 00:19:46,239
Speaker 4: So nothing I don't think means laying down the whole day,

416
00:19:46,240 --> 00:19:46,720
Speaker 4: even though.

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Speaker 3: That's the goal.

418
00:19:48,800 --> 00:19:51,440
Speaker 4: I think like the oh, I allowed myself to do

419
00:19:51,520 --> 00:19:54,760
Speaker 4: that thing, And even though it doesn't look strictly like nothing,

420
00:19:54,920 --> 00:19:57,240
Speaker 4: it's still fine. Yeah, you know, I think for me,

421
00:19:57,280 --> 00:20:00,560
Speaker 4: it's just like, oh, I don't want to interact with people.

422
00:20:00,280 --> 00:20:02,440
Speaker 3: For that day. I just want to be like, oh,

423
00:20:02,520 --> 00:20:03,080
Speaker 3: I can just.

424
00:20:03,880 --> 00:20:08,159
Speaker 4: Never say words out loud that aren't treat, which is

425
00:20:08,200 --> 00:20:09,520
Speaker 4: how I call Parker and you.

426
00:20:18,320 --> 00:20:21,280
Speaker 3: Okay, So next, who wrote to us?

427
00:20:21,680 --> 00:20:25,399
Speaker 5: Let's see? We have a letter here? Yes from Chase

428
00:20:26,040 --> 00:20:28,200
Speaker 5: Chase Range, Illinois.

429
00:20:28,200 --> 00:20:29,320
Speaker 3: Sounds gay.

430
00:20:29,600 --> 00:20:33,159
Speaker 5: I'm in he probably is. Let's see, okay, Lisa, I

431
00:20:33,240 --> 00:20:38,920
Speaker 5: am thirty four years old, single guy gay. These are

432
00:20:38,920 --> 00:20:40,880
Speaker 5: my letters I wrote. Why are you keep putting these

433
00:20:40,880 --> 00:20:41,320
Speaker 5: in here?

434
00:20:42,080 --> 00:20:45,439
Speaker 4: You name your kid Chase. Come on, he's gonna be

435
00:20:45,520 --> 00:20:50,359
Speaker 4: chasing Dick. And it's I mean, it is what it is, Chase.

436
00:20:50,720 --> 00:20:54,160
Speaker 5: It's also spelled c h a ce.

437
00:20:54,560 --> 00:20:59,560
Speaker 3: Oh wait, It'sasse. Get the hell out of I'm joking.

438
00:20:59,600 --> 00:21:02,159
Speaker 4: Of course, I don't have any idea, but Yeshase.

439
00:21:03,680 --> 00:21:06,520
Speaker 5: So I'm a thirty four year old single guy. Gay

440
00:21:06,920 --> 00:21:12,320
Speaker 5: love you by the way. I love interacting with people

441
00:21:12,440 --> 00:21:17,240
Speaker 5: and socializing, but I'm simply lazy all caps. I also

442
00:21:17,359 --> 00:21:20,880
Speaker 5: feel quite satisfied with my relationship to the Real Housewife.

443
00:21:21,040 --> 00:21:28,280
Speaker 5: Oh no, boy just took a turn. Their drama and

444
00:21:28,320 --> 00:21:31,720
Speaker 5: shit talking is enough to fill my cup and my butt. No,

445
00:21:33,440 --> 00:21:36,560
Speaker 5: here's the problem. I do not want to die alone.

446
00:21:37,280 --> 00:21:39,320
Speaker 5: I feel like I need to be seeking a partner

447
00:21:39,520 --> 00:21:42,120
Speaker 5: since I am not getting any younger. But like I said,

448
00:21:42,280 --> 00:21:46,000
Speaker 5: I am lazy all caps again. I love you bie,

449
00:21:46,400 --> 00:21:48,280
Speaker 5: Okay caps exclamation points.

450
00:21:48,400 --> 00:21:50,679
Speaker 3: Very good, They're rather to be exclamation boys after that.

451
00:21:51,520 --> 00:21:55,760
Speaker 4: I think Chase is very judgmental of himself. And the

452
00:21:55,800 --> 00:22:01,200
Speaker 4: reason I say this is there's abs. I've rarely met

453
00:22:01,240 --> 00:22:03,360
Speaker 4: anyone who's quote lazy.

454
00:22:04,000 --> 00:22:05,680
Speaker 3: That's such a judgy word.

455
00:22:06,080 --> 00:22:08,119
Speaker 4: People saying I'm going to take a day and like

456
00:22:08,240 --> 00:22:09,120
Speaker 4: do nothing at home.

457
00:22:09,160 --> 00:22:11,560
Speaker 3: I'm so lazy. It's like, no, you're not.

458
00:22:11,680 --> 00:22:15,439
Speaker 4: You're human and we're human being, not a human doing.

459
00:22:15,800 --> 00:22:19,240
Speaker 4: I know that's a cliche, but it's true. You know,

460
00:22:19,560 --> 00:22:23,280
Speaker 4: and you've never been to a twelve step meeting, But

461
00:22:23,560 --> 00:22:26,600
Speaker 4: lazy is such a judgment on yourself. So I think

462
00:22:26,640 --> 00:22:29,200
Speaker 4: it's first of all, Chase, if I may call you that,

463
00:22:30,160 --> 00:22:34,520
Speaker 4: watch how you talk about yourself. Because I never liked when,

464
00:22:34,640 --> 00:22:36,640
Speaker 4: like Nick, you've done this where you're like, oh, I'm

465
00:22:36,680 --> 00:22:39,639
Speaker 4: so stupid or I'm so dumb. It's like, first of all,

466
00:22:39,640 --> 00:22:42,200
Speaker 4: if you're saying it, you're probably not it. Like it's

467
00:22:42,200 --> 00:22:44,119
Speaker 4: the people who go, am I a narcissist? Oh my god,

468
00:22:44,160 --> 00:22:45,960
Speaker 4: I hope I'm not an narcissist? Of course you're not,

469
00:22:46,119 --> 00:22:51,320
Speaker 4: because you're questioning it. I guarantee you Chase isn't lazy,

470
00:22:51,720 --> 00:22:55,760
Speaker 4: but maybe is overly judgmental on the time that he's

471
00:22:55,760 --> 00:22:59,359
Speaker 4: spending by himself. Also, the one place I'm going to

472
00:22:59,480 --> 00:23:04,199
Speaker 4: judge check is how about we subtract the drama of

473
00:23:04,280 --> 00:23:09,240
Speaker 4: the Real Housewives and then add actual people in yeah,

474
00:23:09,280 --> 00:23:12,800
Speaker 4: who don't come complete with drama, but will invariably have

475
00:23:12,880 --> 00:23:13,439
Speaker 4: some drama.

476
00:23:13,760 --> 00:23:14,200
Speaker 5: For sure.

477
00:23:14,280 --> 00:23:15,840
Speaker 3: There's no one I'm friends.

478
00:23:15,520 --> 00:23:18,040
Speaker 4: With who hasn't had a tiny bit of dramatic content

479
00:23:18,280 --> 00:23:21,320
Speaker 4: just because that's how we live. Someone has somebody dying,

480
00:23:21,560 --> 00:23:24,560
Speaker 4: someone has a sick dog, somebody has a bald head

481
00:23:24,600 --> 00:23:30,040
Speaker 4: and tits Nick, and this is what happens. So that's enough.

482
00:23:30,240 --> 00:23:34,560
Speaker 4: Dramatic content, and also then it's called living because it

483
00:23:34,600 --> 00:23:39,000
Speaker 4: seems really weird to be so wrapped up in drama

484
00:23:39,040 --> 00:23:42,600
Speaker 4: that doesn't really exist for you, Like those aren't people

485
00:23:42,640 --> 00:23:46,199
Speaker 4: who are serving you? And ask yourself, are you protecting

486
00:23:46,240 --> 00:23:51,159
Speaker 4: yourself from interaction with others and getting that little fix

487
00:23:51,359 --> 00:23:55,000
Speaker 4: from people who don't know you on a television It's

488
00:23:55,040 --> 00:23:57,840
Speaker 4: like watching the Sopranos and thinking we're friends with them,

489
00:23:58,320 --> 00:24:00,439
Speaker 4: even though I think you and I probably are friends

490
00:24:00,440 --> 00:24:02,920
Speaker 4: with them in our minds. Yeah, oh totally, they would

491
00:24:02,960 --> 00:24:04,840
Speaker 4: so hang out with us, Like I mean, I'm like

492
00:24:04,880 --> 00:24:08,760
Speaker 4: Eadie Falco's sister. I think anyway, maybe your mom.

493
00:24:09,320 --> 00:24:11,040
Speaker 3: So yeah, I mean, what do you think? Do you

494
00:24:11,600 --> 00:24:11,840
Speaker 3: to me?

495
00:24:11,960 --> 00:24:18,120
Speaker 4: He sounds like it's I'm initially like chuckle is his letter,

496
00:24:18,160 --> 00:24:19,520
Speaker 4: But then I'm like, I'm a little sad that he

497
00:24:19,760 --> 00:24:21,040
Speaker 4: calls himself names like that.

498
00:24:21,840 --> 00:24:24,640
Speaker 5: Yeah, he's just dealing with some stuff on the inside there.

499
00:24:24,680 --> 00:24:27,320
Speaker 5: I think step one is stop watching the Real Housewives.

500
00:24:27,560 --> 00:24:31,679
Speaker 4: I mean yeah, I mean, well, I remember when I

501
00:24:31,720 --> 00:24:34,080
Speaker 4: did The Celebrity Apprentice, and this is of course before

502
00:24:34,640 --> 00:24:35,920
Speaker 4: Trump became anything.

503
00:24:36,040 --> 00:24:37,800
Speaker 3: It was just like a fun show to do, that'll

504
00:24:37,800 --> 00:24:38,280
Speaker 3: be silly.

505
00:24:38,920 --> 00:24:42,399
Speaker 4: It turned me so off to do to watching any

506
00:24:42,560 --> 00:24:45,560
Speaker 4: kind of reality show because I'm like, that's not real.

507
00:24:45,680 --> 00:24:49,520
Speaker 4: Everybody's fake. It's bullshit, and you get so height in

508
00:24:49,680 --> 00:24:51,919
Speaker 4: watching it. Like I if I'm going to watch a

509
00:24:52,000 --> 00:24:54,359
Speaker 4: good drama on TV, say it's like a handmaids Tale

510
00:24:54,440 --> 00:24:55,760
Speaker 4: or something like that, You're just like.

511
00:24:56,040 --> 00:24:58,080
Speaker 3: Oh, it's worth it because of the art of it.

512
00:24:58,320 --> 00:25:00,600
Speaker 4: But watching these other things, it like just get you

513
00:25:00,720 --> 00:25:03,440
Speaker 4: keyed up and makes you think you know people you don't.

514
00:25:04,280 --> 00:25:07,880
Speaker 5: Yeah, awful people. Yeah, truly, it's the worst. I Mean.

515
00:25:08,320 --> 00:25:11,360
Speaker 5: The thing that gets me with his letter is he said,

516
00:25:11,400 --> 00:25:13,280
Speaker 5: I feel like I need to be seeking a partner

517
00:25:13,320 --> 00:25:16,959
Speaker 5: all that getting any younger. And I've gone back and

518
00:25:17,000 --> 00:25:21,399
Speaker 5: forth on this. I've asked a therapists about this brad

519
00:25:21,960 --> 00:25:25,760
Speaker 5: or guy, you know, I feel like he says, I

520
00:25:25,760 --> 00:25:28,040
Speaker 5: feel like I need to be seeking a partner, and

521
00:25:28,040 --> 00:25:29,800
Speaker 5: I always think do I like, do you need to

522
00:25:29,880 --> 00:25:33,560
Speaker 5: actively be looking and the apps and doing this and

523
00:25:33,600 --> 00:25:36,280
Speaker 5: making yourself go out or are you just like doing

524
00:25:36,359 --> 00:25:38,440
Speaker 5: stuff that makes you happy and as you live through

525
00:25:38,440 --> 00:25:41,720
Speaker 5: life you meet that person, Like, what's the answer is it? Like, No,

526
00:25:42,160 --> 00:25:43,240
Speaker 5: I have no idea.

527
00:25:43,040 --> 00:25:48,280
Speaker 4: As a single goal who's dated both in the era

528
00:25:48,400 --> 00:25:51,280
Speaker 4: of apps and things like that, plus the old fashioned

529
00:25:51,320 --> 00:25:53,359
Speaker 4: way when they would drive up to your farm and

530
00:25:53,400 --> 00:25:58,560
Speaker 4: a horse and buggy and would trade your father would

531
00:25:58,640 --> 00:26:01,919
Speaker 4: trade you for two goats the sheep, and that's pretty good.

532
00:26:01,800 --> 00:26:02,359
Speaker 3: Price for me.

533
00:26:02,440 --> 00:26:07,119
Speaker 4: I gotta tell you, I honestly, in my gut, I

534
00:26:07,280 --> 00:26:11,760
Speaker 4: feel like just living life and seeing what happens, because

535
00:26:11,800 --> 00:26:14,320
Speaker 4: then you're just open to things. And that's where all

536
00:26:14,359 --> 00:26:17,400
Speaker 4: good ideas come from, is just having some And again

537
00:26:17,480 --> 00:26:18,280
Speaker 4: that's alone time.

538
00:26:18,320 --> 00:26:18,800
Speaker 3: It's going.

539
00:26:19,040 --> 00:26:23,119
Speaker 4: I'm allowing myself to live my life alone and still

540
00:26:23,160 --> 00:26:26,080
Speaker 4: look outward. You could still walk down the street by yourself,

541
00:26:26,240 --> 00:26:28,359
Speaker 4: but not have your eyes and your phone or to

542
00:26:28,400 --> 00:26:30,960
Speaker 4: the ground. You can still be looking outward and be open,

543
00:26:31,640 --> 00:26:36,960
Speaker 4: but you don't have to be actively like searching and

544
00:26:37,119 --> 00:26:40,399
Speaker 4: striving sound like they will never get you the results

545
00:26:40,480 --> 00:26:40,800
Speaker 4: you want.

546
00:26:41,240 --> 00:26:43,600
Speaker 5: Yeah, I mean that's the best example I can think

547
00:26:43,640 --> 00:26:44,840
Speaker 5: of right off the top of my head. Is like

548
00:26:44,880 --> 00:26:48,399
Speaker 5: the New Year's resolutioners, oh terrible. Never like when you

549
00:26:48,440 --> 00:26:51,280
Speaker 5: go from just you know, fucking off for lack of

550
00:26:51,280 --> 00:26:53,080
Speaker 5: a better word, the last four months of the year,

551
00:26:53,400 --> 00:26:55,600
Speaker 5: you've been drinking and going to parties and eating sugar,

552
00:26:55,600 --> 00:26:59,600
Speaker 5: and now you're like all right, no carbs and no alcoholics. Extreme,

553
00:26:59,800 --> 00:27:02,679
Speaker 5: gonna go here and guess what more times than not,

554
00:27:03,560 --> 00:27:06,640
Speaker 5: you're gonna say relapse, but you're gonna it's gonna come back.

555
00:27:06,800 --> 00:27:07,240
Speaker 4: Yeah. Right.

556
00:27:07,320 --> 00:27:09,840
Speaker 5: So it's like if you're going out, say he he

557
00:27:09,840 --> 00:27:11,919
Speaker 5: he has a he's motivated one day and he flips

558
00:27:11,920 --> 00:27:14,560
Speaker 5: the script. Yeah, I'm gonna done being lazy. I'm gonna

559
00:27:14,600 --> 00:27:17,880
Speaker 5: go out and I'm gonna chase men. I'm gonna pull

560
00:27:17,920 --> 00:27:19,280
Speaker 5: my ween around and do all this stuff.

561
00:27:19,320 --> 00:27:21,359
Speaker 3: Turned him into a bottom, I'm just bottom.

562
00:27:21,520 --> 00:27:27,080
Speaker 5: Probably we're gonna ask me. I'm gonna dm find out.

563
00:27:27,440 --> 00:27:29,720
Speaker 5: But if he flips the script and he's like, I'm

564
00:27:29,720 --> 00:27:32,280
Speaker 5: gonna go hard, like New Year's Resolution style and go

565
00:27:32,359 --> 00:27:34,680
Speaker 5: into it. And then if he's disappointed or like things

566
00:27:34,720 --> 00:27:36,080
Speaker 5: aren't going his way and he's like, oh, I'm just

567
00:27:36,080 --> 00:27:37,719
Speaker 5: gonna go back to what I was doing, and then

568
00:27:37,760 --> 00:27:40,280
Speaker 5: he'll go deeper into what he was already doing as

569
00:27:40,280 --> 00:27:43,400
Speaker 5: opposed to like, hey, maybe once a week, well it's

570
00:27:43,440 --> 00:27:44,400
Speaker 5: once a week go to a bar.

571
00:27:44,560 --> 00:27:45,879
Speaker 3: Yeah, it's go with the flow.

572
00:27:46,359 --> 00:27:49,760
Speaker 4: You if no one has ever gotten burnt out on anything,

573
00:27:49,760 --> 00:27:52,320
Speaker 4: if they just want with the flow. True, So you've

574
00:27:52,400 --> 00:27:55,840
Speaker 4: never like been but I used to think it was

575
00:27:55,880 --> 00:27:59,520
Speaker 4: great to be driven and to strive and to find

576
00:27:59,600 --> 00:28:00,440
Speaker 4: a calm plishment.

577
00:28:00,680 --> 00:28:01,760
Speaker 3: And it's just like, I don't know.

578
00:28:02,400 --> 00:28:04,760
Speaker 4: I mean, every friend I've kind of met in the past,

579
00:28:05,160 --> 00:28:07,800
Speaker 4: you know, twenty years, has been just because you happen

580
00:28:07,840 --> 00:28:10,320
Speaker 4: to go someplace and you vibed and you got it.

581
00:28:10,359 --> 00:28:13,719
Speaker 4: Was like, I'm going to actively seek friendships. God damn it,

582
00:28:14,200 --> 00:28:17,760
Speaker 4: I'm going to this connection group and we are going

583
00:28:17,800 --> 00:28:18,280
Speaker 4: to all do.

584
00:28:18,320 --> 00:28:19,639
Speaker 3: A forced hike together.

585
00:28:20,680 --> 00:28:23,240
Speaker 4: Like, by the way, yeah, don't don't ever name physical

586
00:28:23,280 --> 00:28:26,399
Speaker 4: activity for me, but yeah, I think poor Chase I

587
00:28:26,480 --> 00:28:33,119
Speaker 4: would be like, Also, thirty four is to me not

588
00:28:33,440 --> 00:28:37,080
Speaker 4: in quote danger of dying alone. And that's a little

589
00:28:37,119 --> 00:28:38,920
Speaker 4: young to be dramatic, but I get it.

590
00:28:38,960 --> 00:28:42,479
Speaker 3: That's where he is. Housewives, Yep, they sure have. And

591
00:28:42,560 --> 00:28:45,000
Speaker 3: you know what it is to dying alone.

592
00:28:45,200 --> 00:28:48,960
Speaker 4: Guess what, Chase? Everyone dies alone. Like if you could

593
00:28:48,960 --> 00:28:51,440
Speaker 4: have a wife sitting there, you're still alone in your death.

594
00:28:51,640 --> 00:28:56,360
Speaker 4: Like there's just the reality. I think it's acceptance that

595
00:28:57,560 --> 00:29:00,640
Speaker 4: and not in a fatalistic, depressing way. Man, We're all

596
00:29:00,680 --> 00:29:03,200
Speaker 4: gonna die alone and that's okay. And I have to

597
00:29:03,240 --> 00:29:06,920
Speaker 4: accept that my body's gonna slow down, I'm gonna you know,

598
00:29:07,440 --> 00:29:11,360
Speaker 4: getting an acceptance of these inevitable things really free you

599
00:29:11,520 --> 00:29:14,120
Speaker 4: up to be more inflow and meet people and be

600
00:29:14,240 --> 00:29:16,720
Speaker 4: present and be in conversation.

601
00:29:16,240 --> 00:29:18,440
Speaker 3: And not have it forced. Does that make sense to you?

602
00:29:18,640 --> 00:29:18,840
Speaker 2: Yeah?

603
00:29:18,880 --> 00:29:20,720
Speaker 5: I think like also too. And I've done this in

604
00:29:20,760 --> 00:29:23,360
Speaker 5: the past, where like say you're on a dating app

605
00:29:24,280 --> 00:29:26,520
Speaker 5: and you get a match and you're excited about it,

606
00:29:26,520 --> 00:29:27,680
Speaker 5: and you're like, oh, I get a match and like

607
00:29:27,760 --> 00:29:30,520
Speaker 5: maybe it doesn't pan out or like they're not responsive

608
00:29:30,720 --> 00:29:32,880
Speaker 5: or x y Z or like you get excited about

609
00:29:32,880 --> 00:29:35,240
Speaker 5: all these opportunities, but then say they fall through and

610
00:29:35,360 --> 00:29:37,600
Speaker 5: you just start going down the other way versus like

611
00:29:38,080 --> 00:29:40,040
Speaker 5: you know, you're waiting for them to respond. It's like

612
00:29:40,280 --> 00:29:42,760
Speaker 5: it's just like a constant Yeah, I mean, hey, like

613
00:29:42,760 --> 00:29:44,360
Speaker 5: are they gonna get back to me? Is this gonna?

614
00:29:44,360 --> 00:29:46,400
Speaker 5: Is this the one? Is this the Meanwhile? If you

615
00:29:46,480 --> 00:29:48,520
Speaker 5: just lived your life and do stuff you live your life,

616
00:29:49,080 --> 00:29:52,240
Speaker 5: you kind of This is something that my therapist told me,

617
00:29:52,400 --> 00:29:54,920
Speaker 5: was like people just kind of are attracted to like

618
00:29:55,040 --> 00:29:57,880
Speaker 5: you and what you're doing, your energy, you're vibe, Yeah,

619
00:29:57,920 --> 00:29:59,800
Speaker 5: you got your own shit. You're not like, hey, what

620
00:29:59,800 --> 00:30:01,800
Speaker 5: do you like a puppy? Dog following them around. Be

621
00:30:01,840 --> 00:30:03,160
Speaker 5: like you like me? You like me? You got your

622
00:30:03,160 --> 00:30:05,440
Speaker 5: own shit going on? Yeah, they find that attractive if

623
00:30:05,480 --> 00:30:06,280
Speaker 5: they like you. Great.

624
00:30:06,640 --> 00:30:08,960
Speaker 4: So I think Chase should get out of the house

625
00:30:09,000 --> 00:30:11,360
Speaker 4: once twice a week. Yeah, get rid of the real

626
00:30:11,360 --> 00:30:14,080
Speaker 4: house while I stop watching some real dramatic stuff. So

627
00:30:14,120 --> 00:30:16,720
Speaker 4: you could talk to someone about something other than those

628
00:30:16,800 --> 00:30:18,280
Speaker 4: bitchy queens.

629
00:30:18,520 --> 00:30:20,840
Speaker 3: And just don't be so hard on yourself. Don't call

630
00:30:20,920 --> 00:30:23,840
Speaker 3: yourself lazy. We'll do that for you. Do you have

631
00:30:23,880 --> 00:30:26,360
Speaker 3: another letter we do this, bitch.

632
00:30:26,680 --> 00:30:29,200
Speaker 5: We have a lady.

633
00:30:29,080 --> 00:30:32,160
Speaker 4: Oh, or, as we like to be called, a bit

634
00:30:32,680 --> 00:30:33,880
Speaker 4: clams clams.

635
00:30:34,040 --> 00:30:40,360
Speaker 5: Yes, Melissa from New Rochelle, Oh, New York, Okay, where

636
00:30:40,400 --> 00:30:41,320
Speaker 5: my grandmother lived.

637
00:30:41,520 --> 00:30:43,080
Speaker 3: Oh really, God rest the soul.

638
00:30:43,280 --> 00:30:45,080
Speaker 5: Oh God, she had a penthouse.

639
00:30:47,200 --> 00:30:48,720
Speaker 3: Arleen had it going on.

640
00:30:48,920 --> 00:30:53,920
Speaker 4: I'm keeping my first don't dimp my jewelry a.

641
00:30:53,680 --> 00:30:57,920
Speaker 5: Way she's that is literally, I think the ghost of

642
00:30:57,960 --> 00:30:59,120
Speaker 5: her just went inside of you.

643
00:30:59,360 --> 00:31:00,240
Speaker 3: I'm telling you.

644
00:31:00,080 --> 00:31:03,040
Speaker 4: Those women all wanted to keep their jewelry away from

645
00:31:03,080 --> 00:31:05,680
Speaker 4: one particular cousin who was mean to them.

646
00:31:06,480 --> 00:31:11,320
Speaker 3: She didn't call me on yours poort upon.

647
00:31:13,920 --> 00:31:21,240
Speaker 4: The unniversary, and now she's dead to make give my sapphires.

648
00:31:23,440 --> 00:31:26,480
Speaker 5: It's true. Melissa from New Rochelle, New York. I'm gonna

649
00:31:26,560 --> 00:31:30,960
Speaker 5: talk like this, Okay, Dear Lisa. First off, I'm a

650
00:31:31,080 --> 00:31:33,720
Speaker 5: huge fan and also have an ex husband with big

651
00:31:33,760 --> 00:31:39,720
Speaker 5: balls done that.

652
00:31:39,720 --> 00:31:41,200
Speaker 3: That's a good reason for a long time.

653
00:31:41,240 --> 00:31:44,040
Speaker 4: By the way, boy, living alone, I never have to

654
00:31:44,080 --> 00:31:46,400
Speaker 4: be in danger that two disco balls are gonna hit

655
00:31:46,480 --> 00:31:49,320
Speaker 4: me in the naggin pretty big.

656
00:31:49,440 --> 00:31:52,840
Speaker 5: Okay, Okay, let's come back to that. But now I

657
00:31:52,880 --> 00:31:56,400
Speaker 5: live alone in New York City and I absolutely love it,

658
00:31:56,560 --> 00:32:00,840
Speaker 5: having my sex and the city mom. Thought of going

659
00:32:00,880 --> 00:32:05,320
Speaker 5: out after a long workday is not appealing in any way.

660
00:32:06,280 --> 00:32:09,120
Speaker 5: But with friends wanting to get together, I'm struggling with

661
00:32:09,160 --> 00:32:12,000
Speaker 5: how to balance my love of being alone with the

662
00:32:12,080 --> 00:32:16,680
Speaker 5: pressure to be social and keep friendships alive. What do

663
00:32:16,800 --> 00:32:19,080
Speaker 5: you recommend? Thanks in advance?

664
00:32:19,200 --> 00:32:22,280
Speaker 4: I mean it sounds like she's killing it. I mean

665
00:32:22,720 --> 00:32:27,560
Speaker 4: like Chase is the fucking idiot. No, it sounds like

666
00:32:27,560 --> 00:32:30,920
Speaker 4: like the she says balance, here's the problem with balance.

667
00:32:31,760 --> 00:32:32,200
Speaker 3: You're not.

668
00:32:32,840 --> 00:32:35,720
Speaker 4: You only start talking about balance when you're out of it.

669
00:32:36,360 --> 00:32:38,239
Speaker 4: Then you notice it and you're like, oh shit, I

670
00:32:38,240 --> 00:32:39,760
Speaker 4: felt so in balanced yesterday.

671
00:32:39,800 --> 00:32:43,240
Speaker 3: What happened? So I think it's like kind of going maybe.

672
00:32:43,000 --> 00:32:47,840
Speaker 4: Setting up a loose sort of network of like, Okay,

673
00:32:47,920 --> 00:32:51,040
Speaker 4: my loose schedule is I always take Friday night and

674
00:32:51,160 --> 00:32:54,880
Speaker 4: Sunday to like do nothing and be by myself. But Saturday,

675
00:32:55,000 --> 00:32:57,680
Speaker 4: you know, do something with friends or do something with family.

676
00:32:58,040 --> 00:33:01,160
Speaker 4: It's not having this sort of all or nothing. I

677
00:33:01,160 --> 00:33:03,920
Speaker 4: think the big problem with people is it's either all

678
00:33:04,000 --> 00:33:06,800
Speaker 4: or nothing. And that's the problem with classifying ourselves, even

679
00:33:06,800 --> 00:33:09,640
Speaker 4: though we all do it as introverts or extroverts, because no,

680
00:33:09,800 --> 00:33:11,880
Speaker 4: I always need to be alone. I always need to

681
00:33:11,920 --> 00:33:15,360
Speaker 4: be with people. No, like it has to be balanced somehow.

682
00:33:15,720 --> 00:33:18,200
Speaker 4: So I mean, I don't think she sounds like sah.

683
00:33:18,360 --> 00:33:21,240
Speaker 4: First of all, she's from New Rochelle and she finally

684
00:33:21,400 --> 00:33:23,160
Speaker 4: escaped it and lives in New York City. I mean,

685
00:33:23,400 --> 00:33:25,920
Speaker 4: enjoy it and don't. By the way, those of you

686
00:33:25,960 --> 00:33:27,880
Speaker 4: who live in New York City, trust me. I lived

687
00:33:27,920 --> 00:33:30,680
Speaker 4: in New York for years. Never once went to a museum,

688
00:33:31,480 --> 00:33:34,080
Speaker 4: never once went to Central Park and laid out there

689
00:33:34,280 --> 00:33:36,480
Speaker 4: like some mama luke who thinks it's their backyard.

690
00:33:36,800 --> 00:33:38,080
Speaker 3: I never once went.

691
00:33:37,920 --> 00:33:41,680
Speaker 4: To a trendy singles BA called Adam Zappa or Adams

692
00:33:41,800 --> 00:33:44,360
Speaker 4: rib somethink. Those were the days when we would go

693
00:33:44,360 --> 00:33:47,200
Speaker 4: to the singles bas You'd sit up there with your

694
00:33:47,280 --> 00:33:50,280
Speaker 4: martini and your Donna Karen rap dress, and the men

695
00:33:50,320 --> 00:33:53,280
Speaker 4: would come up and early, lady, how you doing looking

696
00:33:53,280 --> 00:33:56,760
Speaker 4: for it to good ba. But never did any of

697
00:33:56,800 --> 00:33:59,800
Speaker 4: that stuff, so she's probably having her little moment.

698
00:34:00,040 --> 00:34:06,160
Speaker 5: It sounds awesome. My first thought, like, this is the

699
00:34:06,200 --> 00:34:09,160
Speaker 5: women I date. She has an ex husband with big balls.

700
00:34:09,800 --> 00:34:10,880
Speaker 5: I could fill the space.

701
00:34:11,120 --> 00:34:13,799
Speaker 3: Always get rid of the ex husband with big balls.

702
00:34:13,840 --> 00:34:15,920
Speaker 5: That's right. And she's like, now I live in New

703
00:34:16,000 --> 00:34:18,439
Speaker 5: York City alone and absolutely love it. You're single and

704
00:34:18,440 --> 00:34:19,520
Speaker 5: you're living in New York City.

705
00:34:19,960 --> 00:34:20,480
Speaker 3: Yeah.

706
00:34:20,640 --> 00:34:24,799
Speaker 5: Again, what seems to be a night one night.

707
00:34:24,880 --> 00:34:27,239
Speaker 4: You know what she needs to do is set up

708
00:34:27,480 --> 00:34:29,759
Speaker 4: you set up. See this is where you're doing to

709
00:34:29,760 --> 00:34:32,640
Speaker 4: get horny and try to bang the listeners. Listen, people,

710
00:34:32,680 --> 00:34:34,640
Speaker 4: I'm trying to protect you. If you're a woman or

711
00:34:34,680 --> 00:34:38,600
Speaker 4: a gay man out there, don't bangn It's always.

712
00:34:38,160 --> 00:34:39,280
Speaker 3: A road to trouble.

713
00:34:39,719 --> 00:34:45,360
Speaker 4: But we'll talk about emotional unavailability in a different podcast episode. Yes,

714
00:34:45,480 --> 00:34:48,200
Speaker 4: that is not even make sense. You just got obsessed

715
00:34:48,200 --> 00:34:49,279
Speaker 4: with Wicked six months ago.

716
00:34:49,320 --> 00:34:51,399
Speaker 3: I don't know, I know you're gay.

717
00:34:51,440 --> 00:34:54,439
Speaker 4: Now, I think she and Chase should actually hook up

718
00:34:54,840 --> 00:34:56,920
Speaker 4: and like switch a lot. I don't even hook up

719
00:34:56,960 --> 00:35:00,440
Speaker 4: physically because he's he's a gay and like kind of

720
00:35:00,520 --> 00:35:04,680
Speaker 4: she should educate him a little in like connecting. But

721
00:35:04,840 --> 00:35:07,480
Speaker 4: like there is too much pressure in New York though,

722
00:35:07,520 --> 00:35:10,279
Speaker 4: to do things. I do find that's that where the

723
00:35:10,280 --> 00:35:13,360
Speaker 4: balance gets tipped, where you're like every night there's like

724
00:35:13,400 --> 00:35:16,360
Speaker 4: a cool restaurant or a cool bar, a cool opening

725
00:35:16,440 --> 00:35:18,800
Speaker 4: of something, and it's just like, eh, the beauty is.

726
00:35:18,840 --> 00:35:21,480
Speaker 4: I remember once when I was sitting I had been

727
00:35:21,520 --> 00:35:25,480
Speaker 4: invited to a like a movie premiere of some I

728
00:35:25,520 --> 00:35:27,000
Speaker 4: don't know, it was a big deal. It was a

729
00:35:27,080 --> 00:35:29,560
Speaker 4: Jim Carrey movie or something, and I was literally I

730
00:35:29,600 --> 00:35:31,560
Speaker 4: said no because I didn't feel those things fed my

731
00:35:31,560 --> 00:35:34,360
Speaker 4: soul anymore. And I was literally across the street in

732
00:35:34,400 --> 00:35:37,120
Speaker 4: a diner watching people, and I was like, oh, that's

733
00:35:37,120 --> 00:35:39,839
Speaker 4: the thing I was supposed to go to. I've never

734
00:35:39,880 --> 00:35:42,880
Speaker 4: been happier sitting alone by myself in a diner. So

735
00:35:42,920 --> 00:35:45,759
Speaker 4: you like you notice the times when you are kind

736
00:35:45,760 --> 00:35:47,920
Speaker 4: of like making the right choice of like, oh, being

737
00:35:47,920 --> 00:35:51,280
Speaker 4: around those people wasn't feeding it. Being alone did.

738
00:35:52,239 --> 00:35:55,440
Speaker 5: So I don't know, man, Yeah, this is like I

739
00:35:55,480 --> 00:35:57,320
Speaker 5: want to like help her, but it seems like life's

740
00:35:57,360 --> 00:35:58,200
Speaker 5: going pretty good.

741
00:35:58,400 --> 00:36:01,160
Speaker 3: It seems like that's a humble brag letter. Yeah, I'm

742
00:36:01,200 --> 00:36:02,279
Speaker 3: living in New York. My life.

743
00:36:02,320 --> 00:36:04,279
Speaker 4: I mean, like what seems to what is there a

744
00:36:04,360 --> 00:36:08,160
Speaker 4: kernel of something in it that sounds tragically?

745
00:36:08,239 --> 00:36:11,440
Speaker 5: I mean the line I thought of going out after

746
00:36:11,880 --> 00:36:13,840
Speaker 5: a long day of work is not appealing anyway.

747
00:36:13,920 --> 00:36:16,200
Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, I think that's something you got to just

748
00:36:16,239 --> 00:36:20,359
Speaker 4: accept about yourself. By the way, save it for the weekend. Now,

749
00:36:20,400 --> 00:36:23,719
Speaker 4: the problem is then you're going to try to stuff it.

750
00:36:23,800 --> 00:36:26,239
Speaker 4: That's where the balance problem will come in, where you

751
00:36:26,280 --> 00:36:28,520
Speaker 4: s'll try to stuff it all into the weekend and

752
00:36:28,560 --> 00:36:29,880
Speaker 4: then hates the weekends.

753
00:36:30,320 --> 00:36:31,400
Speaker 3: So maybe it's.

754
00:36:31,200 --> 00:36:32,960
Speaker 4: Going one day a week, I'm going to go for

755
00:36:33,320 --> 00:36:35,919
Speaker 4: drinks with the girlies there, go and watch a Real

756
00:36:35,920 --> 00:36:38,400
Speaker 4: Housewives with the girl with the gal pals.

757
00:36:38,760 --> 00:36:40,480
Speaker 3: I don't know what girls do. I think that's what

758
00:36:40,520 --> 00:36:46,480
Speaker 3: they do. I probably correct. She is definitely not.

759
00:36:47,840 --> 00:36:54,279
Speaker 4: Maybe I think Celia is a potential scissorer from way back,

760
00:36:55,800 --> 00:37:03,640
Speaker 4: way back. She yet, yes, no, But I think it's

761
00:37:03,640 --> 00:37:07,480
Speaker 4: like basically, take one night a week, fall on the

762
00:37:07,520 --> 00:37:09,880
Speaker 4: sword and be like I gotta make something happen one

763
00:37:09,960 --> 00:37:13,040
Speaker 4: night a week, then take your Saturday or your Friday.

764
00:37:12,840 --> 00:37:13,960
Speaker 3: And then allow yourself.

765
00:37:14,000 --> 00:37:16,160
Speaker 4: I think all of this is like allowing yourself to

766
00:37:16,239 --> 00:37:19,960
Speaker 4: be yourself and find your own balance and stop questioning

767
00:37:20,000 --> 00:37:24,719
Speaker 4: what's right for you on the inside and doesn't have

768
00:37:24,800 --> 00:37:27,279
Speaker 4: to look like a TV show. That's probably probably why

769
00:37:27,320 --> 00:37:30,000
Speaker 4: I never went to any trendy things or went to

770
00:37:30,280 --> 00:37:32,839
Speaker 4: museums or anything, because I didn't feel it.

771
00:37:32,800 --> 00:37:33,400
Speaker 3: On the inside.

772
00:37:33,440 --> 00:37:36,279
Speaker 4: It was like, well, I'm should be going. Anytime you're

773
00:37:36,280 --> 00:37:38,960
Speaker 4: saying should, it's probably a don't, right.

774
00:37:39,280 --> 00:37:40,920
Speaker 5: Yeah, I like to fall on the sword thing. I

775
00:37:40,960 --> 00:37:43,080
Speaker 5: think that's what you should do, so you should do Melissa,

776
00:37:43,200 --> 00:37:47,320
Speaker 5: fall on the sword, sit on the sword. My nickname

777
00:37:47,320 --> 00:37:49,440
Speaker 5: in high school is Excalibur. You know what I'm saying,

778
00:37:49,560 --> 00:37:50,360
Speaker 5: So we don't.

779
00:37:50,520 --> 00:37:54,840
Speaker 4: Oh, could you please explain that it sounds very inter resting.

780
00:37:55,480 --> 00:37:58,560
Speaker 5: Out of a rock and fight another army. I think that's.

781
00:37:59,480 --> 00:38:05,640
Speaker 3: Wow, someone's taking Shakespeare class. Listen. I think we've been

782
00:38:06,040 --> 00:38:07,000
Speaker 3: helpful to Chase.

783
00:38:07,080 --> 00:38:09,640
Speaker 4: I think Melissa has done some gentle bragging and we

784
00:38:09,760 --> 00:38:11,719
Speaker 4: kind of hate her a little bit now, and you're

785
00:38:11,760 --> 00:38:14,880
Speaker 4: gonna date her. Uh. If you have a question for me,

786
00:38:15,719 --> 00:38:18,400
Speaker 4: make sure to email us us shrink this show at

787
00:38:18,600 --> 00:38:21,480
Speaker 4: gmail dot com that I was gonna spell it, but

788
00:38:21,520 --> 00:38:25,040
Speaker 4: I'm like, really, could you like spell it without wait?

789
00:38:25,120 --> 00:38:27,120
Speaker 4: See if you could spell it Nick without looking down?

790
00:38:27,480 --> 00:38:29,840
Speaker 4: Because you got what was your GPA in college?

791
00:38:30,040 --> 00:38:30,239
Speaker 1: Oh?

792
00:38:30,320 --> 00:38:32,719
Speaker 5: College was good? What college? We were at? A three

793
00:38:32,800 --> 00:38:34,160
Speaker 5: even two?

794
00:38:34,560 --> 00:38:36,160
Speaker 3: Remember what was your school?

795
00:38:36,280 --> 00:38:42,920
Speaker 5: Yeah? Personality? Yes, look, dude, Celia's faces.

796
00:38:43,040 --> 00:38:44,400
Speaker 3: I know it's pretty crazy.

797
00:38:44,600 --> 00:38:49,480
Speaker 4: So try to spell shrink this show at Gmail without looking.

798
00:38:49,719 --> 00:38:57,200
Speaker 5: S h R I N hey t H s s

799
00:38:57,440 --> 00:38:58,160
Speaker 5: h W.

800
00:39:08,760 --> 00:39:11,120
Speaker 4: Every week I like to show that you know Lisa

801
00:39:11,160 --> 00:39:15,200
Speaker 4: Lampinelli despite my famed fortune. In general, overall, Jones Sequa

802
00:39:15,760 --> 00:39:18,600
Speaker 4: are absolutely imperfect, just like the rest of you.

803
00:39:19,000 --> 00:39:19,120
Speaker 5: Am.

804
00:39:19,200 --> 00:39:22,799
Speaker 4: I less imperfect than most of you, duh obvi, but

805
00:39:22,960 --> 00:39:25,640
Speaker 4: I still make mistakes. And this is when I told

806
00:39:25,680 --> 00:39:30,120
Speaker 4: my friend Andrew Ginsberg about because whenever I do something bad,

807
00:39:30,200 --> 00:39:34,640
Speaker 4: I try to confess to you because they hold you accountable. No,

808
00:39:34,920 --> 00:39:36,719
Speaker 4: just because I feel I could be open. Now, Nick,

809
00:39:36,840 --> 00:39:39,600
Speaker 4: tell me, please if you can relate to this.

810
00:39:40,880 --> 00:39:43,080
Speaker 3: It was a very busy day on the road. It's

811
00:39:43,200 --> 00:39:43,840
Speaker 3: very a lot.

812
00:39:43,640 --> 00:39:46,200
Speaker 4: Of traffic, A lot of people wanted to get a

813
00:39:46,200 --> 00:39:49,200
Speaker 4: certain place at a certain time, and heck, yeah, I'm

814
00:39:49,239 --> 00:39:51,920
Speaker 4: one of them two right, and there I am in

815
00:39:51,960 --> 00:39:56,280
Speaker 4: my I don't like to brag twenty ten Lexus SUV

816
00:39:57,000 --> 00:40:00,680
Speaker 4: with my three hundred and sixteen thousand mile because I

817
00:40:00,719 --> 00:40:04,160
Speaker 4: feel at heart, you know, I'm the gal who drives

818
00:40:04,160 --> 00:40:06,719
Speaker 4: a car into the ground. I'm a gal who, like

819
00:40:06,760 --> 00:40:09,399
Speaker 4: my dad or my mom, has that work ethic, like, man,

820
00:40:09,480 --> 00:40:12,280
Speaker 4: we're gonna buy that car, and we're gonna get everything

821
00:40:12,320 --> 00:40:14,879
Speaker 4: out of it. I remember once having a freaking car,

822
00:40:15,400 --> 00:40:18,799
Speaker 4: Chevy Chavette in my first car when I was in

823
00:40:18,840 --> 00:40:22,080
Speaker 4: my twenties, and I didn't get rid of it until

824
00:40:22,400 --> 00:40:25,440
Speaker 4: the window broke, so you had to put like plastic

825
00:40:25,480 --> 00:40:29,200
Speaker 4: on it. And my mother, in all her inemitable power

826
00:40:29,239 --> 00:40:34,240
Speaker 4: and lightness of being, said, you look like a Puerto Rican. Really,

827
00:40:34,560 --> 00:40:37,960
Speaker 4: that's why I figure better get that change. So I

828
00:40:38,040 --> 00:40:39,680
Speaker 4: like a car that I drive into the ground, but

829
00:40:39,719 --> 00:40:42,520
Speaker 4: it still looks good. Lexus has never looked bad. Yeah,

830
00:40:42,640 --> 00:40:45,319
Speaker 4: so I'm driving, but I've always said to myself, this

831
00:40:45,400 --> 00:40:50,080
Speaker 4: car doesn't really suit me. I have Toyota personality. I'm

832
00:40:50,160 --> 00:40:53,680
Speaker 4: raised like a human. I'm raised lower middle class. We

833
00:40:53,719 --> 00:40:56,000
Speaker 4: didn't have tons. We had to take our student loans,

834
00:40:56,280 --> 00:40:58,920
Speaker 4: so we were, thank god privileged enough to go to college.

835
00:40:59,040 --> 00:41:02,640
Speaker 4: But very basic folk. I'm very dunkin donuts. I'm basic

836
00:41:02,680 --> 00:41:05,880
Speaker 4: as fuck. So at heart, I know I'm a Toyota

837
00:41:05,920 --> 00:41:10,080
Speaker 4: person driving Alexis. But now we're in the heavy traffic

838
00:41:10,200 --> 00:41:15,239
Speaker 4: day I referenced and some guy. I know it was

839
00:41:15,280 --> 00:41:18,160
Speaker 4: a guy because I'm assuming. I'm sure he was white,

840
00:41:18,160 --> 00:41:20,720
Speaker 4: because I'm assuming that too, because all white men are.

841
00:41:20,680 --> 00:41:21,440
Speaker 3: Terrible, right.

842
00:41:22,600 --> 00:41:27,000
Speaker 4: He literally cuts me off so close. And I rarely

843
00:41:27,000 --> 00:41:29,040
Speaker 4: get scared on the road. I always say my two

844
00:41:29,080 --> 00:41:32,879
Speaker 4: talents ever were driving and comedy. That's all I can do,

845
00:41:33,760 --> 00:41:36,040
Speaker 4: so I never really get that scared. He cuts me

846
00:41:36,080 --> 00:41:39,160
Speaker 4: off like within an inch, and I was like ugh,

847
00:41:40,160 --> 00:41:43,239
Speaker 4: And the first oh my god, it's so evil. The

848
00:41:43,280 --> 00:41:46,120
Speaker 4: first thought that comes to my mind as I watch

849
00:41:46,160 --> 00:41:47,120
Speaker 4: him drive in front of me.

850
00:41:47,160 --> 00:41:49,840
Speaker 3: I don't even beat the horn. I don't do anything outward.

851
00:41:49,880 --> 00:41:55,360
Speaker 4: It's all my internal fuck up, which is, huh, enjoy

852
00:41:55,480 --> 00:41:58,480
Speaker 4: your fucking Nissan, asshole?

853
00:42:00,000 --> 00:42:01,080
Speaker 3: Are even saying it?

854
00:42:01,160 --> 00:42:05,120
Speaker 4: I'm so grossed out because it's such a like rich

855
00:42:05,280 --> 00:42:06,880
Speaker 4: people asshole move.

856
00:42:07,440 --> 00:42:10,040
Speaker 3: And again, yet did I do it anything outward? No?

857
00:42:10,440 --> 00:42:13,680
Speaker 4: I didn't beep, I didn't follow him. I didn't roll

858
00:42:13,719 --> 00:42:16,280
Speaker 4: down the windows. I've always said I have rage everywhere,

859
00:42:16,320 --> 00:42:19,480
Speaker 4: but the road I've never because it's just too much

860
00:42:19,480 --> 00:42:21,640
Speaker 4: at stakes, it's very really scary. It's too much a

861
00:42:21,640 --> 00:42:24,959
Speaker 4: steak when you're driving. But the first thought was I'm

862
00:42:25,080 --> 00:42:28,520
Speaker 4: better than you because I drive this fucking car and

863
00:42:28,640 --> 00:42:29,080
Speaker 4: you're a.

864
00:42:28,960 --> 00:42:29,600
Speaker 3: Piece of shit.

865
00:42:30,040 --> 00:42:34,080
Speaker 4: No guarantee you. He's a piece of shit for all

866
00:42:34,120 --> 00:42:37,879
Speaker 4: different reasons. It's not a Nissan because guess what this

867
00:42:37,960 --> 00:42:42,719
Speaker 4: is how God got me back A mere two weeks later,

868
00:42:44,280 --> 00:42:49,719
Speaker 4: Fucking Lexus starts shaking in the front boo. I'm like,

869
00:42:49,840 --> 00:42:53,600
Speaker 4: after only three hundred and sixteen thousand miles, how dare you?

870
00:42:54,800 --> 00:42:59,000
Speaker 4: And do you know what I took it in? They

871
00:42:59,040 --> 00:43:01,200
Speaker 4: had me convinced I have to buy a new car,

872
00:43:02,000 --> 00:43:04,279
Speaker 4: and I said, you know what your penance and your

873
00:43:04,320 --> 00:43:08,520
Speaker 4: practice is now. You gotta go back and buy the

874
00:43:08,560 --> 00:43:12,520
Speaker 4: car that's really you. You gotta buy Toyota.

875
00:43:13,400 --> 00:43:14,320
Speaker 3: No, not a Nissan.

876
00:43:15,000 --> 00:43:18,600
Speaker 4: They're kind of the same, they are they have just

877
00:43:18,800 --> 00:43:21,200
Speaker 4: our family's a Toyota family. And I was like, this

878
00:43:21,280 --> 00:43:24,280
Speaker 4: is the Universe's way of teaching me that that little

879
00:43:24,320 --> 00:43:29,080
Speaker 4: part of my ego that's still attached to things is

880
00:43:29,800 --> 00:43:34,360
Speaker 4: just not something I need anymore. I need to be

881
00:43:34,440 --> 00:43:37,320
Speaker 4: driving around in a regular car like a regular person,

882
00:43:37,360 --> 00:43:42,400
Speaker 4: because that's who I am internally, and legit is alexis

883
00:43:42,440 --> 00:43:45,200
Speaker 4: better than a Toyota. Maybe it has a little more pickup,

884
00:43:45,680 --> 00:43:48,680
Speaker 4: maybe it's more roomy. Whatever it is, I'm not fancy.

885
00:43:48,800 --> 00:43:51,520
Speaker 4: So go back to your roots. Get a Toyota, Lisa,

886
00:43:51,600 --> 00:43:56,319
Speaker 4: and see how that feels. And it does feel a

887
00:43:56,360 --> 00:44:01,759
Speaker 4: little weird, I know. Well, Luckily Angel intervened as part

888
00:44:01,800 --> 00:44:05,880
Speaker 4: three of the story. My mechanic ended up fixing the lexus,

889
00:44:05,880 --> 00:44:09,680
Speaker 4: so I get to push off my ego issues until

890
00:44:09,760 --> 00:44:10,880
Speaker 4: my lexus.

891
00:44:10,440 --> 00:44:11,359
Speaker 3: Truly breaks down.

892
00:44:11,360 --> 00:44:13,880
Speaker 4: But I did talk to my shrink about going to

893
00:44:13,920 --> 00:44:17,040
Speaker 4: that judgment with that guy, and she says, I think

894
00:44:17,400 --> 00:44:19,640
Speaker 4: the most uncomfortable thing for you to do, which is

895
00:44:19,680 --> 00:44:23,680
Speaker 4: obviously when we're uncomfortable, there's the best growth is going

896
00:44:23,760 --> 00:44:31,480
Speaker 4: to be getting the car you wait, the car you need,

897
00:44:32,440 --> 00:44:36,239
Speaker 4: versus the car car you want. And I think that

898
00:44:36,320 --> 00:44:39,399
Speaker 4: car is going to be a fucking toy owner. Yeah

899
00:44:39,520 --> 00:44:42,520
Speaker 4: it is, so, I mean I think those so I

900
00:44:42,760 --> 00:44:45,720
Speaker 4: like when I have a fuck up that actually drives

901
00:44:45,719 --> 00:44:49,440
Speaker 4: me to work on an issue, you know, I like that.

902
00:44:49,560 --> 00:44:51,480
Speaker 4: I thought it and owned it, and it was embarrassing

903
00:44:51,520 --> 00:44:54,160
Speaker 4: to say it. The first time I told our friend Andrew,

904
00:44:54,160 --> 00:44:57,240
Speaker 4: I was so embarrassed because he's like a Volvo driver.

905
00:44:57,360 --> 00:45:00,359
Speaker 4: But he's a basic guy too at heart, He's he's

906
00:45:00,719 --> 00:45:05,200
Speaker 4: like just us. I think, my dirty Italian self someday

907
00:45:05,239 --> 00:45:07,440
Speaker 4: have to just buy a Toyota. But I'm not getting

908
00:45:07,480 --> 00:45:10,520
Speaker 4: a fucking Camra. I like them, but they're too small.

909
00:45:12,200 --> 00:45:15,719
Speaker 4: I just feel like I'm and also like to Mike

910
00:45:16,840 --> 00:45:21,640
Speaker 4: pull down my own veil. I'm getting older and uh

911
00:45:22,080 --> 00:45:26,200
Speaker 4: getting in and out of one of those fucking back seats. No, yeah,

912
00:45:26,200 --> 00:45:29,839
Speaker 4: you gotta have an ISSUV would because I'm always making out,

913
00:45:30,480 --> 00:45:34,280
Speaker 4: as you know, constantly having the sex in the car.

914
00:45:34,840 --> 00:45:37,000
Speaker 4: That is my That's going to be my fuck up

915
00:45:37,040 --> 00:45:39,240
Speaker 4: next week is that I had the sex in a car.

916
00:45:39,840 --> 00:45:43,480
Speaker 4: Can you imagine ever paying for sex? No, that's for

917
00:45:43,520 --> 00:45:46,840
Speaker 4: a different episode. The only reason I thought, I was thinking,

918
00:45:46,880 --> 00:45:49,360
Speaker 4: why would I ever be in a backseat of a car.

919
00:45:49,560 --> 00:45:50,560
Speaker 3: Probably just be life.

920
00:45:50,560 --> 00:45:53,840
Speaker 4: I drove up on some male hooker just happened to

921
00:45:53,840 --> 00:45:57,719
Speaker 4: be standing there. Hey, hey, sailor, you want to hop

922
00:45:57,760 --> 00:46:02,520
Speaker 4: in the back of my Toyota? I mean it could happen.

923
00:46:02,760 --> 00:46:03,840
Speaker 5: I hope it does happen.

924
00:46:04,000 --> 00:46:04,160
Speaker 3: I do.

925
00:46:04,880 --> 00:46:06,279
Speaker 4: I did have a dream that I was making out

926
00:46:06,280 --> 00:46:08,200
Speaker 4: with a really hot guy in the back of a truck.

927
00:46:08,239 --> 00:46:12,080
Speaker 4: The others I don't know, some guy supposedly from my past.

928
00:46:12,600 --> 00:46:14,800
Speaker 3: You don't remember who was though, No, but he was hot.

929
00:46:15,000 --> 00:46:15,359
Speaker 3: How hot?

930
00:46:15,480 --> 00:46:16,040
Speaker 5: Are we talking?

931
00:46:16,440 --> 00:46:18,040
Speaker 3: Like a little.

932
00:46:17,880 --> 00:46:22,879
Speaker 4: Football player, not a big football player, at a little

933
00:46:23,000 --> 00:46:24,160
Speaker 4: tiny football player.

934
00:46:24,560 --> 00:46:30,920
Speaker 5: A corner like a bottle head, a corner paper.

935
00:46:31,640 --> 00:46:37,080
Speaker 4: Yeah with Nick, Oh my god, listen, we gotta go.

936
00:46:37,400 --> 00:46:40,319
Speaker 4: I've shown you my flaws. Next time we speak you

937
00:46:40,360 --> 00:46:42,960
Speaker 4: may be talking to Toyota driver. But for now, thank god,

938
00:46:43,000 --> 00:46:45,839
Speaker 4: my ego gets the lexus. All right, Yeah, all right,

939
00:46:46,080 --> 00:46:48,839
Speaker 4: So Nick, it's been a pleasure. Tell people once again

940
00:46:48,840 --> 00:46:49,640
Speaker 4: where they can find you.

941
00:46:49,840 --> 00:46:53,120
Speaker 5: You could follow me on social media at nick scopes

942
00:46:53,360 --> 00:46:55,959
Speaker 5: like the Mouthwashed because I'm fresh and Mintee.

943
00:46:55,760 --> 00:46:59,240
Speaker 4: No, you're neither, and you can find me at Lisa

944
00:46:59,320 --> 00:47:03,520
Speaker 4: Klampa now Lisa Lampinelle. If you can't smell it, well,

945
00:47:03,520 --> 00:47:06,040
Speaker 4: then you don't deserve to borow. And please come back

946
00:47:06,040 --> 00:47:08,560
Speaker 4: again and hear our next episode of shrink This and

947
00:47:08,640 --> 00:47:10,759
Speaker 4: make sure to send us your questions at shrinth This

948
00:47:10,880 --> 00:47:15,760
Speaker 4: Show at gmail dot com, at Shrinthstop up timemalth dot com.

949
00:47:15,560 --> 00:47:16,600
Speaker 3: And make sure to follow.

950
00:47:16,440 --> 00:47:19,320
Speaker 4: Us on socials and make sure to listen to shrink

951
00:47:19,400 --> 00:47:23,600
Speaker 4: this on your iHeartRadio app or wherever you get your podcasts,

952
00:47:23,600 --> 00:47:25,279
Speaker 4: which should be the iHeartRadio app.

953
00:47:25,280 --> 00:47:26,000
Speaker 1: What are you stupid?