WEBVTT - The Science of Celebration - Lab 035 0:00:00.600 --> 0:00:05.160 Hey, y'all. Before today's new lab kicks off, we've got 0:00:05.160 --> 0:00:08.840 a little treat, an oldie, but a total goodie on 0:00:08.960 --> 0:00:13.239 the art and sociology of celebration. Whether you're gearing up 0:00:13.240 --> 0:00:16.400 for the Fourth of July fireworks, a backyard family reunion, 0:00:16.680 --> 0:00:20.239 or even just celebrating the miracle of being alive this summer, 0:00:20.760 --> 0:00:24.800 this one's for you. Stick around, because sometimes the best 0:00:24.840 --> 0:00:29.440 sparks come from labs. We've already lit I'm Tt and 0:00:29.480 --> 0:00:37.320 I'm Zachiah, and this is Dope Labs. Welcome to Dope Labs, 0:00:37.400 --> 0:00:40.760 a weekly podcast that mixes hardcore science with pop culture 0:00:40.840 --> 0:00:48.160 and a healthy dose of friendship. In this Lab, we're 0:00:48.159 --> 0:00:51.559 dipping into a classic episode on why we as humans 0:00:51.600 --> 0:00:55.760 throw confetti, light fireworks, and you know my favorite, gather 0:00:55.880 --> 0:00:59.279 around the grill to celebrate. It's a timeless deep dive 0:00:59.320 --> 0:01:02.760 into how celebrate shapes our brains, our bonds, and our 0:01:02.840 --> 0:01:05.280 sense of belonging. If we promise, it'll make you think 0:01:05.319 --> 0:01:07.920 a little differently about the next kickback, you go too. 0:01:08.760 --> 0:01:10.600 We love celebrating. 0:01:10.640 --> 0:01:15.000 We like celebrating everything from big things to small things. Yes, 0:01:15.160 --> 0:01:19.280 in this episode, we are talking all about celebration and 0:01:19.319 --> 0:01:21.039 the sociology behind it. 0:01:21.240 --> 0:01:26.560 I think it's important to really acknowledge celebrations exist across cultures. 0:01:26.600 --> 0:01:30.720 They may look different, but almost every culture has some 0:01:30.800 --> 0:01:36.520 type of celebratory time or season or event. And there 0:01:36.560 --> 0:01:40.399 are some cultural universals, so behaviors that or values that 0:01:40.440 --> 0:01:43.039 show up in different cultures. They might not necessarily be 0:01:43.080 --> 0:01:44.880 the same, but we see them all the time. So 0:01:46.280 --> 0:01:51.080 dancing or food, or rituals or different religious practices, those 0:01:51.120 --> 0:01:55.720 are cultural universals, and they're all often elements of various 0:01:55.800 --> 0:01:59.600 types of celebrations. So it can feel like celebration itself 0:01:59.840 --> 0:02:02.200 is a hallmark of human behavior. 0:02:02.400 --> 0:02:04.800 So with that being said, let's jump into the recitation. 0:02:08.080 --> 0:02:08.560 What do we know? 0:02:08.639 --> 0:02:11.640 TT, Well, we know right now there are a lot 0:02:11.800 --> 0:02:14.520 of people that are celebrating, including us. 0:02:14.440 --> 0:02:17.880 Yes, and we also know there seems to be this 0:02:18.440 --> 0:02:25.959 gravitational pool to celebration being outside, loud and with snacks 0:02:26.000 --> 0:02:26.680 and drinks. 0:02:26.919 --> 0:02:28.639 Yes, we need libations. 0:02:28.840 --> 0:02:31.000 And I think, you know, I just want to understand 0:02:31.400 --> 0:02:34.320 what's driving us to celebrate. I think I want to 0:02:34.360 --> 0:02:39.160 know why it's food always something that folks want to 0:02:39.200 --> 0:02:40.120 bring out when. 0:02:40.000 --> 0:02:42.560 It's time to celebrate. Is that something that's just like 0:02:42.680 --> 0:02:43.720 is it a cultural thing? 0:02:43.800 --> 0:02:47.280 Is it all cultures and even beyond just us celebrating? 0:02:47.360 --> 0:02:51.799 This feels like some spontaneous celebration in the fall. There's 0:02:51.840 --> 0:02:55.480 that season of celebration right after spooky season where if 0:02:55.480 --> 0:02:59.360 people celebrate Thanksgiving around that time, heading into all of 0:02:59.360 --> 0:03:02.000 the winter high holidays, I feel like I can almost 0:03:02.000 --> 0:03:02.760 smell it in. 0:03:02.760 --> 0:03:04.840 The air, you know. 0:03:05.760 --> 0:03:09.160 But if I didn't grow up celebrating these holidays, would 0:03:09.160 --> 0:03:10.280 I still feel that same way? 0:03:10.520 --> 0:03:10.760 Right? 0:03:11.280 --> 0:03:13.480 Maybe it's a part of our subconscious mind to feel 0:03:13.480 --> 0:03:15.280 like we're supposed to be celebrating right now. 0:03:15.440 --> 0:03:16.440 And then I want to know. 0:03:17.160 --> 0:03:21.720 Friendsgiving is a new thing, but I don't know whose idea. Yeah, 0:03:21.800 --> 0:03:24.000 this was, it's a genius idea, but I want to 0:03:24.040 --> 0:03:26.360 know whose idea it was and when it got started. 0:03:26.680 --> 0:03:30.200 I think friendsgiving is the perfect example as we start 0:03:30.240 --> 0:03:32.720 to think about celebration on a whole right because you 0:03:32.760 --> 0:03:35.480 don't have to believe any one certain thing to participate 0:03:35.480 --> 0:03:38.640 in friendsgiving. It also feels like it's a little more 0:03:38.640 --> 0:03:40.840 low stakes than some of the other holidays, so you 0:03:40.840 --> 0:03:44.119 don't have to jump in and sprinkle cinnamon all over 0:03:44.160 --> 0:03:44.560 your house. 0:03:45.440 --> 0:03:47.920 If you want to participate in friendsgiving. 0:03:48.280 --> 0:03:51.480 Friendsgiving feels more like a come as you are celebration 0:03:52.120 --> 0:03:54.440 rather than you got to get dressed up with your 0:03:54.440 --> 0:03:57.680 auntie and uncle and answer all their annoying questions. 0:03:57.800 --> 0:04:00.200 I don't want to wear a sequin top. So I 0:04:00.240 --> 0:04:03.560 think we're ready to move into the dissection and understand 0:04:03.600 --> 0:04:06.920 more about celebration. So this dissection is a little bit different. 0:04:07.000 --> 0:04:10.160 The guest expert today, Well, it's us welcome. 0:04:10.280 --> 0:04:10.920 I think we're. 0:04:10.720 --> 0:04:13.680 Professional celebrators and I think it's a great time for 0:04:13.760 --> 0:04:16.760 us to just hold that mirror up and explore some 0:04:16.839 --> 0:04:19.400 of our own behavior around holidays. 0:04:19.480 --> 0:04:22.760 We're talking all about celebrations, and I think a great 0:04:22.800 --> 0:04:26.040 place to start would be talking about a celebration kind 0:04:26.040 --> 0:04:30.159 of like Friendsgiving, where it is a new form of 0:04:30.480 --> 0:04:34.520 celebration and I think a lot of people are starting 0:04:34.560 --> 0:04:35.560 to do it. 0:04:35.680 --> 0:04:38.160 So let's start with the history of Friendsgiving. It's basically 0:04:38.240 --> 0:04:41.120 a spin on Thanksgiving. And when we look back at 0:04:41.120 --> 0:04:45.200 Thanksgiving is basically a big feast. And so your want 0:04:45.360 --> 0:04:49.640 for a meat lover's pizza, my want for mimosa. That's 0:04:49.720 --> 0:04:52.919 gathering around food, and that's not new. Almost all cultures 0:04:53.279 --> 0:04:56.480 are considered kind of cultures of celebration. And Thanksgiving was 0:04:56.520 --> 0:04:58.640 centered on the fall harvest, similar to how we talked 0:04:58.640 --> 0:05:01.239 about cuffing season and having been with the spring harvest, 0:05:01.560 --> 0:05:05.040 it's kind of this cyclical or seasonal celebration. 0:05:04.800 --> 0:05:06.359 M okay. 0:05:06.600 --> 0:05:08.520 And so it's best to have a feast, which is 0:05:08.560 --> 0:05:12.360 like a large meal, and it's usually outrageous amounts of 0:05:12.360 --> 0:05:14.440 food compared to what you would normally have day to day. 0:05:14.839 --> 0:05:16.320 It's gonna be pretty hard to do that if you 0:05:16.320 --> 0:05:18.200 don't have a season of harvest, if you don't have 0:05:18.240 --> 0:05:19.200 a lot of stuff to choose from. 0:05:19.279 --> 0:05:21.240 And you know what I like is that when you 0:05:21.279 --> 0:05:24.400 look up the definition of feast, it's a verb and 0:05:24.440 --> 0:05:26.840 it means to eat and drink sumptuously. 0:05:27.160 --> 0:05:31.520 I like that word sumptuously. I'm just started using that. 0:05:31.760 --> 0:05:34.599 So when we start to think about friends Giving, this 0:05:34.640 --> 0:05:36.760 is kind of new. Like you said, it's been on 0:05:36.800 --> 0:05:38.560 the rise. If you look at Google trends and they 0:05:38.560 --> 0:05:41.400 show you know, that little graph of how often different 0:05:41.480 --> 0:05:44.040 terms are searched, it doesn't make its first kind of 0:05:44.080 --> 0:05:47.359 big blip until like twenty ten, and then you just 0:05:47.440 --> 0:05:50.640 see every year around November it just peaks up. And 0:05:50.680 --> 0:05:52.560 so it's been on the rise since like the twenty ten. 0:05:52.640 --> 0:05:55.080 If you think about two thousand and seven to twenty ten, 0:05:55.120 --> 0:05:58.440 the economy trying to make a comeback. Millennials were one 0:05:58.440 --> 0:06:00.919 of the first generations to move really far away from home, 0:06:01.480 --> 0:06:03.680 So can you even afford to get back home? 0:06:03.760 --> 0:06:07.320 So I remember being an undergrad and before we would 0:06:07.360 --> 0:06:09.880 go home for Thanksgiving break, me and my friends one 0:06:09.960 --> 0:06:12.960 year got together and had like a little Thanksgiving because 0:06:13.000 --> 0:06:14.800 we were like, oh, you know, we're thankful for each other. 0:06:14.839 --> 0:06:17.640 We should all get together and do something. So I 0:06:17.640 --> 0:06:21.200 think it also was something where folks wanted to celebrate 0:06:21.360 --> 0:06:25.359 Thanksgiving with their friends before having to go home and 0:06:25.440 --> 0:06:27.000 celebrate with their families. 0:06:27.160 --> 0:06:29.320 And that makes me think also there is something that 0:06:29.480 --> 0:06:33.400 we kind of borrow from LGBTQ culture, which is your 0:06:33.520 --> 0:06:37.520 chosen family. Yeah, these people you choose and who have 0:06:37.600 --> 0:06:39.599 chosen you in return. So even if you don't have 0:06:39.680 --> 0:06:43.000 great relationships with your blood relatives, right, you have this 0:06:43.160 --> 0:06:46.520 family who you are super grateful for and you want 0:06:46.560 --> 0:06:49.320 to celebrate with them, so you create this occasion to 0:06:49.400 --> 0:06:51.280 do that. I love that, z And so I think 0:06:51.360 --> 0:06:53.600 we're almost talking about friends Giving, and when we think 0:06:53.640 --> 0:06:55.160 about the evolution of it, some of it may be 0:06:55.200 --> 0:06:58.560 out of necessity. So if you can't afford to travel home, 0:06:58.800 --> 0:07:01.000 or if you have to do a pot luck style 0:07:01.080 --> 0:07:02.680 dinner because do you know how much. 0:07:02.560 --> 0:07:03.239 A turkey costs? 0:07:03.240 --> 0:07:06.599 Turkeys are expensive. I will never purchase a turkey. Write 0:07:06.600 --> 0:07:09.000 that in Stone. I will never purchase a turkey. 0:07:09.920 --> 0:07:12.080 So when you consider those things and then these other 0:07:12.200 --> 0:07:14.760 kind of emotional pools where you want to acknowledge these 0:07:14.800 --> 0:07:17.000 people who have supported you year round and who have 0:07:17.320 --> 0:07:20.640 helped you grow m you kind of have these converging 0:07:20.720 --> 0:07:23.800 factors that drive this new holiday. 0:07:24.080 --> 0:07:25.840 We're redefining family. 0:07:25.520 --> 0:07:28.040 We are, and we're also dignifying friendship. 0:07:28.120 --> 0:07:28.800 Absolutely. 0:07:28.840 --> 0:07:31.720 We talked about that in the What About Your Friend's episode, 0:07:31.920 --> 0:07:35.120 like we need to be giving our friendships way more 0:07:35.160 --> 0:07:37.600 weight than we give them, Like, our friends are so 0:07:37.960 --> 0:07:40.680 important to our lives, and. 0:07:40.680 --> 0:07:44.280 I think if you understand that, then you got to 0:07:44.360 --> 0:07:49.520 have a celebration. Yet, this is the bet Awards of friendship. Okay, 0:07:49.640 --> 0:07:52.360 the Emmys of friendship, the Grammys of friendship, that's. 0:07:52.280 --> 0:07:53.080 What friends giving it is. 0:07:53.160 --> 0:07:54.560 I need to find a dress, roll. 0:07:54.440 --> 0:07:56.960 Out the red carpet for the people you love. So, 0:07:57.080 --> 0:07:59.760 as we mentioned before, we're looking at celebration through the 0:07:59.800 --> 0:08:01.080 life of sociology. 0:08:01.440 --> 0:08:05.800 Sociology is the study of society, and that's the big umbrella. 0:08:05.920 --> 0:08:08.520 So that can be the development the structure of a 0:08:08.600 --> 0:08:11.320 society or how it functions, and you can also talk 0:08:11.320 --> 0:08:14.520 about like social relationships and institutions. 0:08:14.560 --> 0:08:15.760 So when we're talking. 0:08:15.480 --> 0:08:20.160 About the sociology of celebration, we're talking about how we 0:08:20.240 --> 0:08:26.040 behave cross culturally when a celebration occurs, whether it's planned 0:08:26.240 --> 0:08:28.040 or spontaneous. 0:08:27.680 --> 0:08:30.160 When we try to figure out some clues to help 0:08:30.280 --> 0:08:34.680 us characterize why we behave like this, why we enjoy celebration, 0:08:34.840 --> 0:08:37.760 and sometimes while we celebrate too much. We came across 0:08:37.920 --> 0:08:41.439 the Journal of Comparative Research and Anthropology and Sociology. They 0:08:41.440 --> 0:08:45.960 had a whole issue on celebration and these two authors, 0:08:46.040 --> 0:08:50.600 Rusu and Cantola laid out this great kind of way 0:08:50.679 --> 0:08:54.480 to navigate through celebration. If you think about celebration as 0:08:54.520 --> 0:08:58.520 a map. On most maps, you have a north, south, east, 0:08:58.559 --> 0:08:59.000 and west. 0:08:59.520 --> 0:09:01.640 Those are four coordinates. They give us three. 0:09:01.480 --> 0:09:05.520 Coordinates temporality, spatiality, and sociality. 0:09:06.080 --> 0:09:07.679 Okay, so let's get into it. 0:09:07.800 --> 0:09:12.120 So let's talk about temporality. And this is all about time. 0:09:12.360 --> 0:09:14.960 So when we think about time as it relates to 0:09:14.960 --> 0:09:18.680 celebration celebrations are these disruptions in our day to day. 0:09:18.920 --> 0:09:21.720 I can remember as a kid somebody's birthday party happening 0:09:21.760 --> 0:09:22.360 on a Saturday. 0:09:22.400 --> 0:09:25.760 That was an anomaly, right, Yeah, we were gonna eat cake, 0:09:25.800 --> 0:09:27.319 we were gonna do all these things that we did 0:09:27.320 --> 0:09:28.760 not normally do on Saturday. 0:09:28.840 --> 0:09:30.280 Chuckie Cheese had the best pizza. 0:09:30.400 --> 0:09:32.079 Pizza is your celebration food. 0:09:32.160 --> 0:09:35.000 It really is, and it probably started with chuck E Cheese. 0:09:35.240 --> 0:09:38.440 But you almost find that when we think about these 0:09:38.760 --> 0:09:42.160 celebrations that are rooted in time, so religious holidays, they 0:09:42.200 --> 0:09:44.520 almost pattern our day to day. So if you think 0:09:44.559 --> 0:09:47.960 about our year going along in a circle, every time 0:09:48.000 --> 0:09:51.200 we hit March or April, there are some spring celebrations. 0:09:51.679 --> 0:09:55.240 Every time around the summer, there's Juneteenth or fourth of July, 0:09:55.360 --> 0:09:58.199 whatever you celebrate. Right, there's these things in every year 0:09:58.240 --> 0:10:01.160 when you come around, they almost pattern what our cycle 0:10:01.200 --> 0:10:03.959 of time looks like because they're a disruption every time, 0:10:04.160 --> 0:10:05.319 over and over again. 0:10:05.200 --> 0:10:06.440 Every year at the same time. 0:10:06.559 --> 0:10:09.400 Right, And so it's interesting we can think of these 0:10:09.520 --> 0:10:11.880 celebrations that's helping us shift from the monotony of this 0:10:11.960 --> 0:10:15.240 day to day kind of punch in, punch out clock 0:10:15.320 --> 0:10:17.760 in clock out. They add some excitement to our day 0:10:17.800 --> 0:10:18.640 to day lives. 0:10:18.440 --> 0:10:19.920 And it gives us something to look forward to. 0:10:20.000 --> 0:10:20.920 Right, Yes. 0:10:22.200 --> 0:10:25.280 And it feels a little crazy, right because you're saying, oh, 0:10:25.320 --> 0:10:28.920 we pattern time with these celebrations and they disrupt time. 0:10:29.040 --> 0:10:31.760 So if they disrupt time at the same time all 0:10:31.800 --> 0:10:33.160 the time, aren't they a pattern too. 0:10:33.200 --> 0:10:34.520 It's too much for my brain. It's like if we're 0:10:34.520 --> 0:10:35.200 going into exception. 0:10:37.040 --> 0:10:37.280 Right. 0:10:56.400 --> 0:10:58.760 I saw something else that was really interesting, and it 0:10:58.840 --> 0:11:02.319 talked about these two Greek words related to Greek mythology 0:11:02.559 --> 0:11:05.880 about time, So there was kronos and chiros. You can 0:11:05.920 --> 0:11:09.800 think of chronos as representing the godly personification is what 0:11:09.840 --> 0:11:13.679 this text says of linear, never ending quantitative time. So 0:11:13.720 --> 0:11:15.600 for me, chronos is the clock and we can think 0:11:15.640 --> 0:11:18.160 of chronological order right, linear. 0:11:17.800 --> 0:11:21.480 Time, right, But kiros is a little bit different. Chiros 0:11:21.559 --> 0:11:25.040 is like I'm just going off the vibes, right, And 0:11:25.080 --> 0:11:27.480 for me, that is what celebration time is, like, you know, 0:11:27.559 --> 0:11:30.439 the vibe when we're celebrating, Just show up when it's time. 0:11:30.480 --> 0:11:32.400 Do you remember that time we had a party and 0:11:32.440 --> 0:11:35.800 our friend Sean said she was gonna bring hamburger buns 0:11:35.880 --> 0:11:37.360 and she showed up so late. 0:11:37.280 --> 0:11:39.040 Oh my gosh. And she showed up late. 0:11:39.440 --> 0:11:42.160 I was like, okay, well, you're bringing a critical element 0:11:42.320 --> 0:11:46.920 because we're grilling out and we have burgers and hot dogs, 0:11:46.920 --> 0:11:50.880 and you were in charge of the vehicle buns for 0:11:51.120 --> 0:11:51.840 those meets. 0:11:52.120 --> 0:11:54.000 Sewn showing up when she felt like it was time 0:11:54.000 --> 0:11:57.200 to show up for me, that's Chiros, right, it's no. 0:11:57.320 --> 0:12:00.400 Real What is an hour? What is time? When the 0:12:00.400 --> 0:12:01.040 party starts? 0:12:01.080 --> 0:12:04.160 And I am a firm proponent of Kiro's when it 0:12:04.200 --> 0:12:07.040 comes to when a celebration ends. The party is over 0:12:07.320 --> 0:12:08.160 when we're dead. 0:12:08.480 --> 0:12:12.960 So the next element of the coordinates of celebration is spatiality, 0:12:13.000 --> 0:12:15.680 and that's all about where's the party at. Along with 0:12:15.880 --> 0:12:21.959 our routinized celebrations, this usually happens at a certain place. Right, 0:12:22.080 --> 0:12:24.480 So if you're celebrating passover, maybe you go to a 0:12:24.520 --> 0:12:28.280 satyr at your grandmother's house every year, or maybe if 0:12:28.320 --> 0:12:31.800 you're celebrating ed, you go to your uncle's house every year, 0:12:31.920 --> 0:12:34.200 and that's where all of that celebrating happens. But it 0:12:34.240 --> 0:12:37.280 happens in the same place, and so in your mind, 0:12:37.480 --> 0:12:39.880 as soon as you walk through those doors, you're like, okay, 0:12:40.200 --> 0:12:43.320 it's time to celebrate for me and my family, it 0:12:43.320 --> 0:12:47.280 would alternate every year. For Thanksgiving, we would alternate between 0:12:47.440 --> 0:12:49.920 my uncle Jacob and Aunt Rachel's house. Then it would 0:12:49.920 --> 0:12:52.920 be at my house, so my parents would host Thanksgiving, 0:12:52.920 --> 0:12:54.720 and so we would just go back and forth and 0:12:54.720 --> 0:12:57.440 back and forth. And I think that's because my dad 0:12:57.640 --> 0:13:00.800 is the oldest of eight siblings, and then my uncle 0:13:00.880 --> 0:13:03.360 Jacob is his younger brother. He was right behind him, 0:13:03.400 --> 0:13:06.079 so they're kind of like the heads of the family, 0:13:06.200 --> 0:13:08.560 and so we just alternate between those two. It was 0:13:08.600 --> 0:13:10.920 always so much fun seeing all of my cousins and 0:13:10.960 --> 0:13:13.400 aunts and uncles and everything like that all in one place. 0:13:13.840 --> 0:13:14.480 What about u Z. 0:13:14.880 --> 0:13:19.960 I think for major holidays like Christmas, Thanksgiving, when we 0:13:20.000 --> 0:13:23.200 celebrated those growing up, we always went to my grandma's house, 0:13:23.200 --> 0:13:25.880 so my mom's mom the drive down there, I remember. 0:13:25.679 --> 0:13:27.120 It will be like so excited to go there. 0:13:27.160 --> 0:13:29.040 It was like an hour or so away from where 0:13:29.040 --> 0:13:32.959 we lived in Greensboro, and it was just a thing, right, 0:13:33.000 --> 0:13:34.400 you were just bubbling with excitement. 0:13:34.440 --> 0:13:37.800 Now we went there every other weekend. That wasn't a holiday, 0:13:37.920 --> 0:13:40.280 but it just hit different right now. 0:13:40.360 --> 0:13:42.120 It would have been like homecoming season. 0:13:42.559 --> 0:13:45.440 I can remember A and T Homecoming all right, geho, 0:13:45.559 --> 0:13:47.320 greatest homecoming on Earth. I didn't even go to A 0:13:47.320 --> 0:13:48.920 and T, but I grew up in the city where 0:13:48.920 --> 0:13:51.040 it was, so I felt like A and T's homecoming 0:13:51.160 --> 0:13:53.800 was always like another big holiday. People would come because 0:13:53.800 --> 0:13:55.480 a lot of my family members went there, so you 0:13:55.480 --> 0:13:59.199 would see family. It was like a mini Thanksgiving before Thanksgiving, 0:13:59.520 --> 0:14:02.000 and we would go to my great aunt, my aunt Lina, 0:14:02.040 --> 0:14:04.120 we would go to her house. And so it's just 0:14:04.360 --> 0:14:07.520 interesting how as soon as we started talking about celebrations, 0:14:07.760 --> 0:14:10.880 I can pinpoint these different places for different celebrations. 0:14:11.120 --> 0:14:12.920 Yeah, so I guess we can zoom out a little bit. 0:14:13.040 --> 0:14:15.280 So it's like not even just specific for your family, 0:14:15.320 --> 0:14:19.000 but even like culturally as Americans, like when we think 0:14:19.040 --> 0:14:22.160 about celebrating New Year's Eve, we think of the ball 0:14:22.240 --> 0:14:24.800 dropping in Times Square. We might not necessarily be there, 0:14:25.120 --> 0:14:27.800 but it's just so iconic and ingrain into our minds 0:14:28.040 --> 0:14:28.920 that we think of that. 0:14:29.000 --> 0:14:30.240 When we think of New Year's. 0:14:30.040 --> 0:14:33.800 Eve, the spatiality aspect is really interesting because it can 0:14:33.840 --> 0:14:36.200 be a whole city, you know, like when we think 0:14:36.200 --> 0:14:39.040 about Mardi Gras in New Orleans and when we think 0:14:39.080 --> 0:14:42.120 about Running of the Bulls there are these places where 0:14:42.120 --> 0:14:44.640 these celebrations occur. And it can be broad like that, 0:14:44.960 --> 0:14:48.200 but it can also be really specific. So, right, if 0:14:48.240 --> 0:14:50.720 you normally eating your kitchen or your living room, but 0:14:50.800 --> 0:14:53.360 for big holidays, you guys all gather around a dining 0:14:53.400 --> 0:14:55.240 table and you use that special furniture. 0:14:55.520 --> 0:14:58.720 Hah, the special plates, Yeah, the napkins. 0:15:00.240 --> 0:15:03.880 That's a spatial queue, right, is almost reminiscent of some 0:15:04.000 --> 0:15:07.480 religious ceremonies and celebrations that happen in these sacred spaces 0:15:07.560 --> 0:15:11.120 or sanctuaries, right, And we're almost replicating that. There's something 0:15:11.200 --> 0:15:14.160 ritualistic about a lot of our celebrations anyway, and so 0:15:14.240 --> 0:15:15.560 here we see it appearing again. 0:15:15.760 --> 0:15:16.560 Yeah, and then. 0:15:16.440 --> 0:15:20.880 Even if there isn't a special place for whatever you're 0:15:20.920 --> 0:15:25.080 trying to celebrate, we convert our existing spaces into a 0:15:25.120 --> 0:15:30.160 space for celebration. Absolutely, and that is literally what folks 0:15:30.240 --> 0:15:35.160 did for Friendsgiving. So we've touched temporality, which is time space, 0:15:35.200 --> 0:15:39.000 reality which is where are you? And now we're hitting sociality, 0:15:39.000 --> 0:15:42.160 which is how does it feel. It's the social aspect. 0:15:42.240 --> 0:15:46.480 So the togetherness you're kind of dropping those barriers is 0:15:46.520 --> 0:15:49.600 the vibes. It's really interesting because when you have a holiday. 0:15:49.920 --> 0:15:51.800 You got your core group of people that you always 0:15:51.880 --> 0:15:54.880 normally see, but then you always have some stragglers. You 0:15:54.920 --> 0:15:57.400 got that one cousin who shows up for Easter, you like, 0:15:57.440 --> 0:16:00.320 we haven't seen them all year, right, Or you have 0:16:00.840 --> 0:16:02.920 that aunt or uncle that you don't really deal with 0:16:03.000 --> 0:16:08.680 like that, but you're gonna keep it cute for the holiday, right. 0:16:08.760 --> 0:16:11.520 I think it's really interesting. Even on a broader scale, 0:16:11.560 --> 0:16:14.120 even if you just zoom out, we can almost consider 0:16:14.160 --> 0:16:16.760 this as people being in the holiday spirit or having 0:16:16.760 --> 0:16:17.680 some holiday cheer. 0:16:17.960 --> 0:16:18.840 Mm hmmm hmm. 0:16:19.080 --> 0:16:22.280 It almost feels like community level or group level, we're 0:16:22.320 --> 0:16:24.280 all extending a little bit more grace. 0:16:24.520 --> 0:16:27.800 Yes, worldwide vibes and no one is supposed to be 0:16:27.800 --> 0:16:31.320 coming in and killing the vibe, and so sociality I. 0:16:31.240 --> 0:16:34.479 Think is key to a good celebration. 0:16:34.760 --> 0:16:37.360 But I think it's important to highlight sociality can go 0:16:37.560 --> 0:16:41.240 either way because that sense of community. You can either 0:16:41.560 --> 0:16:44.720 leverage it and make everybody feel equal, you can bring 0:16:44.800 --> 0:16:47.600 everybody in. And it really depends on your holiday because 0:16:47.600 --> 0:16:50.120 if you have a holiday that is built on power 0:16:50.160 --> 0:16:53.760 dynamics and access to certain things, it can also isolate too. 0:16:53.840 --> 0:16:55.880 So you want to be aware of that when you 0:16:55.960 --> 0:16:58.160 building your friends giving. Are you saying everybody got to 0:16:58.160 --> 0:17:00.520 bring a ball of asa space? Everybody can't do that. 0:17:00.680 --> 0:17:01.400 I won't be there. 0:17:02.640 --> 0:17:05.040 And some folks don't drink right, and so those are 0:17:05.080 --> 0:17:06.439 all the things to think about. 0:17:06.720 --> 0:17:06.919 You know. 0:17:06.960 --> 0:17:09.760 I had to really question my cookout style. Over the 0:17:09.760 --> 0:17:14.560 past couple of years, I've had more and more vegetarian friends. Oh, 0:17:14.720 --> 0:17:16.439 and I said, what do you have to offer them? 0:17:16.560 --> 0:17:18.159 Is it a celebration if they can only have a 0:17:18.160 --> 0:17:19.240 potato it's not. 0:17:19.600 --> 0:17:20.600 Oh my goodness. 0:17:20.680 --> 0:17:23.240 Yes, this happened to me because me and Jimmy do 0:17:23.560 --> 0:17:28.040 a holiday like dinner every year, and two dinners ago, 0:17:28.600 --> 0:17:30.440 so not the last one we did, but the one 0:17:30.480 --> 0:17:34.199 before that. We had some friends that showed up and 0:17:34.240 --> 0:17:35.920 I knew that they were vegetarians, and we tried to 0:17:35.960 --> 0:17:40.240 have some vegetarian options, but one was vegan and that 0:17:40.520 --> 0:17:45.080 just eliminated all options. There was literally nothing for them 0:17:45.119 --> 0:17:49.199 to eat. And I was mortified. I was messing up 0:17:49.200 --> 0:17:52.760 the sociality of my dinner party. I was killing the 0:17:52.840 --> 0:17:55.400 vibes from my vegan friends. But I know that they 0:17:55.480 --> 0:17:58.800 knew you meant well. They were good sports. I was 0:17:58.840 --> 0:18:00.960 crying into my hand, Queen of the hand was having 0:18:00.960 --> 0:18:03.800 a bad night. That just takes us to the next 0:18:03.800 --> 0:18:07.399 point about what happens when celebrations and the expectations around 0:18:07.400 --> 0:18:09.800 them get really high and they can add on a 0:18:09.840 --> 0:18:10.439 lot of pressure. 0:18:10.520 --> 0:18:12.040 But we're not going to talk about it just yet. 0:18:12.240 --> 0:18:14.320 We're about to take a break, and when we come back, 0:18:14.560 --> 0:18:17.960 we'll jump right into the case for scaling back on celebrations. 0:18:18.240 --> 0:18:20.959 I know, seems a little counterintuitive, and how we'll continue 0:18:21.000 --> 0:18:22.800 to celebrate even when we can't be together. 0:18:41.359 --> 0:18:44.159 We're back, and now we're going to jump into the 0:18:44.240 --> 0:18:48.480 case for scaling back on celebrations. We have already talked 0:18:48.480 --> 0:18:50.679 in great detail about how we love to celebrate, but 0:18:50.720 --> 0:18:53.760 in some cases, some you kind of have to just 0:18:53.840 --> 0:18:55.480 fall back a little bit and chill. 0:18:55.560 --> 0:18:57.840 I think we have to make some points really clear. 0:18:57.880 --> 0:19:00.199 When we say we like to celebrate, we don't mean 0:19:00.480 --> 0:19:02.680 every time we have to take things to the top. 0:19:03.040 --> 0:19:05.720 I mean we like to find the celebratory moments even 0:19:05.800 --> 0:19:08.040 in the small things. Right, So it's like, hmm, this 0:19:08.160 --> 0:19:11.000 doctor Pepper has all the fizz. It's a parday, you know. 0:19:12.920 --> 0:19:14.280 It's all the little. 0:19:14.000 --> 0:19:16.720 Things, the little stuff when it happens things go the 0:19:16.760 --> 0:19:19.520 way you want, or even when things, don't. That's the 0:19:19.560 --> 0:19:21.840 time to really celebrate that we're just here and making 0:19:21.880 --> 0:19:22.399 it okay. 0:19:22.600 --> 0:19:24.560 Yes, I remember one time when we were in grad 0:19:24.560 --> 0:19:27.760 school and I baked a batch of cookies and I 0:19:27.920 --> 0:19:31.160 took some to the kid's lab and she loved it. 0:19:31.160 --> 0:19:33.320 It was a celebration really for nothing. 0:19:35.480 --> 0:19:36.679 I love that kind of stuff, you know. 0:19:36.760 --> 0:19:40.320 I think we just need more moments of joy for ourselves, right, 0:19:40.400 --> 0:19:43.280 because if we are relying on it externally, the external 0:19:43.320 --> 0:19:43.960 world will fail. 0:19:44.000 --> 0:19:44.080 You. 0:19:44.160 --> 0:19:46.040 We see that we had all the twenty twenty and 0:19:46.040 --> 0:19:47.960 look at what he did. I'm so ashamed of twenty twenty. 0:19:48.000 --> 0:19:49.239