1 00:00:00,160 --> 00:00:03,720 Speaker 1: The guy wants something that you're not. He wants, he wants, 2 00:00:03,720 --> 00:00:06,840 Speaker 1: he wants. That's human nature. We want, we want. All 3 00:00:06,880 --> 00:00:09,320 Speaker 1: he wants is to be filled. He wants you to 4 00:00:09,440 --> 00:00:12,320 Speaker 1: be his dream girl. I've got two words for you, 5 00:00:13,440 --> 00:00:28,040 Speaker 1: break up. What's up? Guys, Welcome back to the podcast. 6 00:00:28,120 --> 00:00:33,240 Speaker 1: Thanks for joining and listening wherever you're coming from, YouTube, Spotify, iTunes. 7 00:00:33,479 --> 00:00:36,080 Speaker 1: If you found me through TikTok, thank you for being here. 8 00:00:36,479 --> 00:00:40,200 Speaker 1: I answer your questions, and we've done this many many 9 00:00:40,240 --> 00:00:44,360 Speaker 1: weeks in a row. You email Grangersmith podcast at gmail 10 00:00:44,400 --> 00:00:47,840 Speaker 1: dot com. Ask me anything about any subject. We'll walk 11 00:00:47,880 --> 00:00:50,800 Speaker 1: through it. I don't have notes, I don't have anything 12 00:00:50,840 --> 00:00:54,880 Speaker 1: in front of me besides just my friendship with you. 13 00:00:55,000 --> 00:00:56,720 Speaker 1: That's what it's going to feel like. Like we're sitting 14 00:00:56,720 --> 00:00:58,080 Speaker 1: in the cab of a truck and we're having a 15 00:00:58,080 --> 00:01:01,360 Speaker 1: conversation in long form, and let's get right to it. 16 00:01:01,440 --> 00:01:06,040 Speaker 1: First question, subject line says still living with an ex? Hey, 17 00:01:06,040 --> 00:01:10,280 Speaker 1: Grandeur would like to remain anonymous. I'm recently new to 18 00:01:10,319 --> 00:01:13,200 Speaker 1: your podcast. I just found it. All I want is 19 00:01:13,360 --> 00:01:16,600 Speaker 1: tough love. Currently living with someone who I guess is 20 00:01:16,680 --> 00:01:19,640 Speaker 1: kind of an ex or something like that. I've never 21 00:01:19,720 --> 00:01:22,360 Speaker 1: dated him, and I've never had the title girlfriend ever. 22 00:01:22,720 --> 00:01:25,200 Speaker 1: We have lived together for five years now. We do 23 00:01:25,319 --> 00:01:29,119 Speaker 1: everything together that a couple would literally everything from talking 24 00:01:29,160 --> 00:01:32,679 Speaker 1: about marriage to breakfast weekly. Recently, about a week ago, 25 00:01:32,720 --> 00:01:35,000 Speaker 1: I found out he's seeing someone else. He tells me 26 00:01:35,400 --> 00:01:39,360 Speaker 1: they aren't anything. I have no idea what to think 27 00:01:39,400 --> 00:01:41,920 Speaker 1: about this because I'm not his girlfriend and I don't 28 00:01:41,959 --> 00:01:43,720 Speaker 1: have the right to know. But I feel like I 29 00:01:43,760 --> 00:01:47,000 Speaker 1: have some right because of certain things. He tells me 30 00:01:47,080 --> 00:01:49,400 Speaker 1: they aren't dating, but he's hiding things. This girl is 31 00:01:49,440 --> 00:01:52,800 Speaker 1: writing him love notes and everything. All I want from him, 32 00:01:52,840 --> 00:01:54,840 Speaker 1: I guess, is honesty, but I don't know how to 33 00:01:54,880 --> 00:01:57,800 Speaker 1: get that. I'm just really having a really hard time dealing. 34 00:01:57,880 --> 00:02:00,480 Speaker 1: How do I start healing? How do I not care? 35 00:02:01,120 --> 00:02:04,040 Speaker 1: This is starting to interfere with my day to day things. 36 00:02:04,160 --> 00:02:07,880 Speaker 1: It's literally hurting my heart and killing me. It'd be 37 00:02:07,920 --> 00:02:10,880 Speaker 1: great if you can give me your input. Thank you, Anonymous, 38 00:02:11,440 --> 00:02:14,320 Speaker 1: Thanks for the question, Thanks for listening. And you say 39 00:02:14,320 --> 00:02:18,799 Speaker 1: here you're from Ohio, so shout out to Ohio. Uh Yeah, 40 00:02:18,840 --> 00:02:20,800 Speaker 1: tough love, that's what you're gonna get. That's what you're 41 00:02:20,840 --> 00:02:23,120 Speaker 1: gonna get. I'm gonna walk through this a couple different ways. 42 00:02:23,160 --> 00:02:27,040 Speaker 1: First of all, I'm gonna say this. You say I 43 00:02:27,200 --> 00:02:30,880 Speaker 1: have no right because of certain because we aren't dating. 44 00:02:32,440 --> 00:02:35,120 Speaker 1: Where did you say that? Yeah, I have no right 45 00:02:35,160 --> 00:02:39,000 Speaker 1: to know anything because I'm not his girlfriend. Yes, you 46 00:02:39,040 --> 00:02:42,320 Speaker 1: absolutely do. You have all kinds of rights. You've been 47 00:02:42,440 --> 00:02:45,120 Speaker 1: This is, first of all, very close friend. You've talked 48 00:02:45,160 --> 00:02:48,680 Speaker 1: about marriage with, you've been dating or excuse me, living 49 00:02:48,720 --> 00:02:52,720 Speaker 1: with for five years, that is essentially dating. Of course, 50 00:02:52,720 --> 00:02:55,440 Speaker 1: you have a right to know. This guy is taking 51 00:02:55,480 --> 00:02:58,920 Speaker 1: advantage of you. So here's their tough love. This guy 52 00:02:59,160 --> 00:03:02,799 Speaker 1: is using he's getting benefits. Obviously you didn't say it, 53 00:03:03,720 --> 00:03:07,200 Speaker 1: but that's what you're implying. He is getting benefits from 54 00:03:07,240 --> 00:03:11,000 Speaker 1: you as a roommate. You have breakfast, you talk about 55 00:03:11,120 --> 00:03:15,240 Speaker 1: possible marriage. That is dating. You just haven't defined it 56 00:03:15,280 --> 00:03:17,760 Speaker 1: in that way, but in every other sense of the word, 57 00:03:18,240 --> 00:03:22,400 Speaker 1: this is your boyfriend, and he is using you by 58 00:03:22,480 --> 00:03:26,480 Speaker 1: not saying that you're his girlfriend. Great for him, right, 59 00:03:27,000 --> 00:03:29,440 Speaker 1: lucky guy. He gets to just play the whole world 60 00:03:29,840 --> 00:03:32,880 Speaker 1: and he gets everything he needs. He's playing house with you. 61 00:03:33,040 --> 00:03:35,280 Speaker 1: He gets you, he gets a breakfast with you, he 62 00:03:35,320 --> 00:03:36,920 Speaker 1: gets to talk about a future, and he gets to 63 00:03:36,960 --> 00:03:40,440 Speaker 1: have another girlfriend. How does this other girlfriend put up 64 00:03:40,480 --> 00:03:43,520 Speaker 1: with you? That's my first question, right, like, how does 65 00:03:43,560 --> 00:03:47,360 Speaker 1: she date him? Knowing he's living with you and y'all 66 00:03:47,360 --> 00:03:50,800 Speaker 1: have talked about marriage and you have sexual benefits going on. 67 00:03:50,920 --> 00:03:54,040 Speaker 1: You know that's true, that's what you're implying. So here's 68 00:03:54,080 --> 00:04:01,040 Speaker 1: my advice to you. Two words. Move out, Pack your stuff, 69 00:04:01,880 --> 00:04:05,120 Speaker 1: and move out as soon as you hear this podcast. 70 00:04:05,360 --> 00:04:07,640 Speaker 1: As soon as you hear this podcast, you start packing 71 00:04:07,640 --> 00:04:09,800 Speaker 1: your stuff and he goes, wait, wait, what are you doing, 72 00:04:09,840 --> 00:04:14,600 Speaker 1: and go, I'm so sorry. I can't. I don't think 73 00:04:14,640 --> 00:04:17,279 Speaker 1: it's right to live with you in this way and 74 00:04:17,360 --> 00:04:19,760 Speaker 1: to play house and you're dating somebody. No, I'm not 75 00:04:19,800 --> 00:04:23,599 Speaker 1: dating anybody. Whatever she's writing you love letters, I don't 76 00:04:23,600 --> 00:04:25,479 Speaker 1: think it's right. That's all you gotta tell him. Hey, 77 00:04:25,520 --> 00:04:27,159 Speaker 1: it has nothing to do with our friendship. I still 78 00:04:27,160 --> 00:04:29,599 Speaker 1: want to be friends with you, but I cannot live 79 00:04:29,640 --> 00:04:33,719 Speaker 1: in this house with you. Where are you going? You're 80 00:04:33,720 --> 00:04:35,760 Speaker 1: gonna go crash at a friend's house on the couch. 81 00:04:36,960 --> 00:04:43,279 Speaker 1: Find another friend, a girl this time, and go crash 82 00:04:43,320 --> 00:04:46,520 Speaker 1: on her couch until you get your feet underneath you 83 00:04:46,600 --> 00:04:50,239 Speaker 1: and you do something. But right now, I'm talking, right now, 84 00:04:50,480 --> 00:04:53,359 Speaker 1: get out, of this house. It's not right. He's using you. 85 00:04:54,960 --> 00:05:00,000 Speaker 1: Oh but he's a sweet guy, and no sweet guys 86 00:05:00,120 --> 00:05:03,400 Speaker 1: could use girls. That's what he's doing. He's just doing 87 00:05:03,400 --> 00:05:06,840 Speaker 1: it in a nice way, and he's so sweet about it, 88 00:05:06,920 --> 00:05:09,760 Speaker 1: and he's lying to you out of the same mouth. 89 00:05:10,760 --> 00:05:16,840 Speaker 1: Move out. There is no other piece of device you 90 00:05:16,880 --> 00:05:20,240 Speaker 1: can listen to right now. Move out. I would tell 91 00:05:20,240 --> 00:05:23,560 Speaker 1: you the same thing if you were dating him, if 92 00:05:23,600 --> 00:05:25,599 Speaker 1: you're dating him for five years, I'd say, what are 93 00:05:25,600 --> 00:05:28,600 Speaker 1: you doing? You're dating for five years, living together. He's 94 00:05:28,640 --> 00:05:31,120 Speaker 1: getting all the benefits of a wife with no ring. 95 00:05:31,800 --> 00:05:36,520 Speaker 1: He gets to go and talk to other girls. No leave, Okay, 96 00:05:37,240 --> 00:05:43,719 Speaker 1: love you leave. Next question, subject line says single mom dating, 97 00:05:43,839 --> 00:05:46,720 Speaker 1: not sure if it's right. Hey, Grangeer, my name is 98 00:05:46,839 --> 00:05:50,240 Speaker 1: Lydia and I'm twenty three years old. I'm a single 99 00:05:50,240 --> 00:05:53,000 Speaker 1: mom and dating. I've been dating my boyfriend for almost 100 00:05:53,040 --> 00:05:56,560 Speaker 1: two years. It just seems like he's completely uninterested in 101 00:05:56,640 --> 00:06:00,000 Speaker 1: being a father. Whenever I ask him about his feelings 102 00:06:00,200 --> 00:06:03,000 Speaker 1: towards my three year old daughter, he always says I'll 103 00:06:03,040 --> 00:06:05,520 Speaker 1: be there for her. I know that I want a 104 00:06:05,520 --> 00:06:08,279 Speaker 1: man who is emotionally involved in my daughter's life. Since 105 00:06:08,279 --> 00:06:11,080 Speaker 1: her biological father isn't there in any shape or form 106 00:06:11,120 --> 00:06:14,480 Speaker 1: at all. My boyfriend and I have been having discussions 107 00:06:14,960 --> 00:06:17,880 Speaker 1: over trying to work on things, but nothing ever seems 108 00:06:17,920 --> 00:06:21,120 Speaker 1: to change, and I become upset when it doesn't. I'm 109 00:06:21,160 --> 00:06:23,880 Speaker 1: scared to leave, even though I feel like it's the 110 00:06:23,960 --> 00:06:26,279 Speaker 1: right thing to do. Love you and your family. PS. 111 00:06:26,640 --> 00:06:30,360 Speaker 1: You were my first concert ever at Southampton County Fair, Virginia, 112 00:06:30,440 --> 00:06:36,039 Speaker 1: twenty seventeen. Thank you, Lydia, Lydia, thank you for listening, 113 00:06:36,080 --> 00:06:37,599 Speaker 1: Thank you for being a fan, Thank you for going 114 00:06:37,640 --> 00:06:40,760 Speaker 1: to the concert in Southampton. Here's my advice to you. 115 00:06:42,200 --> 00:06:47,280 Speaker 1: Move out. Move out. You didn't say you're living with him. 116 00:06:47,320 --> 00:06:49,520 Speaker 1: I'm just guessing that you are. I'm pretty sure you are. 117 00:06:50,480 --> 00:06:53,960 Speaker 1: Move out. First of all, look at it this way. 118 00:06:54,480 --> 00:06:58,040 Speaker 1: You're a single mom. You're looking for a father figure 119 00:06:58,560 --> 00:07:02,360 Speaker 1: for your daughter. You're looking for a husband. Why are 120 00:07:02,400 --> 00:07:05,479 Speaker 1: you still dating after two years? Like? What's taking so 121 00:07:05,600 --> 00:07:10,000 Speaker 1: long that God doesn't want to be around? He would 122 00:07:10,040 --> 00:07:12,000 Speaker 1: tell you that by now, He would have told you. 123 00:07:12,040 --> 00:07:14,320 Speaker 1: He would have grabbed you and said I want to 124 00:07:14,400 --> 00:07:17,160 Speaker 1: be here for you and your daughter. I love you, 125 00:07:17,280 --> 00:07:21,000 Speaker 1: And if you love a single mom, you also love 126 00:07:21,200 --> 00:07:25,200 Speaker 1: the child it's a packaged deal. I love you and 127 00:07:25,240 --> 00:07:28,080 Speaker 1: your daughter. It's a package deal. It doesn't go any 128 00:07:28,080 --> 00:07:30,360 Speaker 1: other way with single moms. You don't get to love 129 00:07:30,400 --> 00:07:33,880 Speaker 1: the single mom but not the child, because then you 130 00:07:33,920 --> 00:07:35,800 Speaker 1: don't really love the mom because the child is a 131 00:07:35,840 --> 00:07:39,640 Speaker 1: part of her, She came from her biologically, she's a 132 00:07:39,680 --> 00:07:43,680 Speaker 1: part of her. You gotta love both. He doesn't, or 133 00:07:43,720 --> 00:07:46,320 Speaker 1: he would have told you. And why if you dated 134 00:07:46,360 --> 00:07:51,960 Speaker 1: this long, move out, move out, you could do this. 135 00:07:52,560 --> 00:07:54,640 Speaker 1: You could do this as a single mom. You could 136 00:07:54,640 --> 00:07:56,840 Speaker 1: be a single mom and raise a baby with no father. 137 00:07:56,920 --> 00:08:00,080 Speaker 1: You can do it. Of course it's not ideal. Well, 138 00:08:00,120 --> 00:08:03,080 Speaker 1: of course you want to find somebody, but not just 139 00:08:03,200 --> 00:08:05,960 Speaker 1: to fill the gap and check a box. You want 140 00:08:06,000 --> 00:08:08,480 Speaker 1: to find somebody that loves you and loves your daughter 141 00:08:08,640 --> 00:08:11,480 Speaker 1: and pours into you and supports you and is there 142 00:08:11,520 --> 00:08:13,880 Speaker 1: for you for the rest of his life. That's what 143 00:08:13,920 --> 00:08:20,880 Speaker 1: you want. Anything less. It's better to be single, anything 144 00:08:21,080 --> 00:08:23,920 Speaker 1: less than what I said. It's just better for you 145 00:08:23,960 --> 00:08:29,800 Speaker 1: to be single than have that alternative, no check boxes, 146 00:08:30,600 --> 00:08:35,120 Speaker 1: no filling the space. Here's a makeshift husband, a makeshift 147 00:08:35,120 --> 00:08:37,640 Speaker 1: father for my daughter. I guess it'll do. My daughter 148 00:08:37,679 --> 00:08:40,840 Speaker 1: needs somebody. I guess he's a male. I guess he'll 149 00:08:40,880 --> 00:08:45,280 Speaker 1: do No. It's better to be single than to find 150 00:08:45,280 --> 00:08:49,880 Speaker 1: someone that's not totally right. He's just there filling a space. 151 00:08:49,960 --> 00:08:53,560 Speaker 1: Don't do it. Move out. That's two in a row. 152 00:08:53,559 --> 00:08:56,960 Speaker 1: See if we can get a third one in a row. Hey, Grander, 153 00:08:57,000 --> 00:08:59,520 Speaker 1: my name is Brian. Already don't have it. My name 154 00:08:59,600 --> 00:09:02,000 Speaker 1: is Brian, fifteen from New York. I'm in high school, 155 00:09:02,120 --> 00:09:04,000 Speaker 1: just started football this year and for the first time, 156 00:09:04,880 --> 00:09:07,400 Speaker 1: but my dad is trying to talk me out of it, 157 00:09:07,440 --> 00:09:08,920 Speaker 1: and I don't know what to do. By the way, 158 00:09:08,960 --> 00:09:11,800 Speaker 1: I love the Smiths, love your music, loved the podcast. Brian, 159 00:09:12,040 --> 00:09:14,560 Speaker 1: thanks for the question. Buddy, fifteen years old, New York, 160 00:09:14,800 --> 00:09:18,160 Speaker 1: in high school, just started football, and your dad is 161 00:09:18,200 --> 00:09:21,840 Speaker 1: trying to talk you out of it. Okay, Brian. There's 162 00:09:21,880 --> 00:09:24,800 Speaker 1: this thing, man, that we have to understand as a 163 00:09:24,840 --> 00:09:27,440 Speaker 1: fifteen year old, which I once was, and I remember 164 00:09:27,480 --> 00:09:30,680 Speaker 1: it like yesterday. There's a thing we have to remember. 165 00:09:31,000 --> 00:09:36,120 Speaker 1: Your dad is the authority of you until you're eighteen. 166 00:09:36,760 --> 00:09:39,000 Speaker 1: That's a rough that's a rough age. But I'm just 167 00:09:39,040 --> 00:09:43,040 Speaker 1: going to say eighteen age of reckoning. While you're still 168 00:09:43,120 --> 00:09:46,480 Speaker 1: under his roof. He's still paying your bills. He's still 169 00:09:46,520 --> 00:09:48,880 Speaker 1: taking care of you and guiding you and leading you. 170 00:09:49,440 --> 00:09:53,959 Speaker 1: Not perfectly. No father is perfect. All fathers make mistakes 171 00:09:54,040 --> 00:09:57,000 Speaker 1: because they're from this earth, and everybody on this earth 172 00:09:57,120 --> 00:10:00,880 Speaker 1: is imperfect. So he's gonna make mistakes. But while you're 173 00:10:00,920 --> 00:10:05,640 Speaker 1: living under his roof, you've got to consider and honor him. Okay, 174 00:10:06,360 --> 00:10:08,160 Speaker 1: so he doesn't want you to play football, And so 175 00:10:08,240 --> 00:10:10,560 Speaker 1: instead of saying no, Dad, I'm gonna play anyway, I'm 176 00:10:10,559 --> 00:10:14,000 Speaker 1: gonna ask Granger what he thinks. I'm probably gonna give 177 00:10:14,000 --> 00:10:16,680 Speaker 1: you the answer you don't want to hear. You got 178 00:10:16,800 --> 00:10:19,240 Speaker 1: to honor your father, but that doesn't mean you don't 179 00:10:19,280 --> 00:10:22,600 Speaker 1: have to communicate with him and sit him down and 180 00:10:22,720 --> 00:10:25,520 Speaker 1: explain to him why you love the game, why you 181 00:10:25,559 --> 00:10:29,080 Speaker 1: want to play. Give him your best argument, Say Dad, 182 00:10:29,120 --> 00:10:31,439 Speaker 1: how about this, how about you give me one season? 183 00:10:32,320 --> 00:10:35,080 Speaker 1: Give me one season if you don't like it. If 184 00:10:35,160 --> 00:10:38,640 Speaker 1: something goes wrong, my grades go bad, or I get out, 185 00:10:38,679 --> 00:10:41,439 Speaker 1: I get into the wrong crowd of friends, or I 186 00:10:41,520 --> 00:10:43,600 Speaker 1: have too much time at practice and not enough time 187 00:10:43,640 --> 00:10:46,360 Speaker 1: at home, or I get injured. Any of those things happen, 188 00:10:46,800 --> 00:10:48,920 Speaker 1: you pull me out and I'll make a deal. I 189 00:10:48,960 --> 00:10:51,960 Speaker 1: will not ask you my junior year or my sophomore 190 00:10:52,040 --> 00:10:54,880 Speaker 1: year to play football. I won't ask you again. Just 191 00:10:54,920 --> 00:10:56,960 Speaker 1: give me one year, dad, I really love this sport. 192 00:10:57,160 --> 00:11:01,360 Speaker 1: How could we compromise this? Put that on him, Make 193 00:11:01,440 --> 00:11:04,120 Speaker 1: him make the decision that way instead of just making 194 00:11:04,240 --> 00:11:09,320 Speaker 1: the decision blindly and maybe not knowing totally the research 195 00:11:09,360 --> 00:11:12,360 Speaker 1: that you've put into it. Tell him you're passionate about it. 196 00:11:12,760 --> 00:11:16,120 Speaker 1: But here's the deal, Brian. If he says no means no. 197 00:11:18,200 --> 00:11:20,880 Speaker 1: You got to honor his wishes because he's your dad, 198 00:11:21,240 --> 00:11:24,200 Speaker 1: and you don't understand that until you're a dad one day, 199 00:11:25,080 --> 00:11:26,959 Speaker 1: and when you tell your fifteen year old son or 200 00:11:27,080 --> 00:11:30,240 Speaker 1: daughter God willing you have them, you tell them something 201 00:11:30,800 --> 00:11:33,719 Speaker 1: for a reason that they can't understand. You just need 202 00:11:33,760 --> 00:11:36,520 Speaker 1: them to follow it, and you need them to honor 203 00:11:36,559 --> 00:11:39,480 Speaker 1: you because you've lived longer than they have, and your 204 00:11:39,520 --> 00:11:41,400 Speaker 1: dad has lived longer than you. He's walked on this 205 00:11:41,440 --> 00:11:44,480 Speaker 1: earth longer. He's seen things you haven't seen, and you 206 00:11:44,559 --> 00:11:47,079 Speaker 1: might not understand it. And you might look at TV 207 00:11:47,160 --> 00:11:49,080 Speaker 1: and go, those guys play football. You might look at 208 00:11:49,120 --> 00:11:53,440 Speaker 1: your friends and say, their parents, let them find a compromise. 209 00:11:54,360 --> 00:11:57,560 Speaker 1: It's time to be a man. It's fifteen with a 210 00:11:57,600 --> 00:12:01,320 Speaker 1: manly conversation. This is how becoming a man begins, with 211 00:12:01,480 --> 00:12:06,840 Speaker 1: manly wisdom and manly conversations, eye contact, sitting down, not 212 00:12:06,960 --> 00:12:09,400 Speaker 1: distracted on the phone. Dad, don't want to talk to you. 213 00:12:10,120 --> 00:12:13,320 Speaker 1: I need to talk to you. Dad. Come here, and 214 00:12:13,360 --> 00:12:14,880 Speaker 1: you get him on the couch and you look him 215 00:12:14,880 --> 00:12:17,000 Speaker 1: in the eye and you say, Dad, I really want 216 00:12:17,040 --> 00:12:19,600 Speaker 1: to play football. And before you say anything, I just 217 00:12:19,640 --> 00:12:22,880 Speaker 1: want you to understand that I would love to make 218 00:12:22,920 --> 00:12:25,240 Speaker 1: some kind of compromise with you because I love the game, 219 00:12:25,679 --> 00:12:27,440 Speaker 1: or I want to be in with my friends, or 220 00:12:27,480 --> 00:12:30,320 Speaker 1: this is something I've always dreamed about. Can you tell 221 00:12:30,320 --> 00:12:34,440 Speaker 1: me your concerns? Dad? Could you allow me to rebuke 222 00:12:34,520 --> 00:12:38,319 Speaker 1: some of those concerns. But Dad, you're the boss of 223 00:12:38,400 --> 00:12:40,600 Speaker 1: this house, and if you say no, I'll follow your rules. 224 00:12:40,600 --> 00:12:43,360 Speaker 1: I just want to give you my best pitch on 225 00:12:43,400 --> 00:12:46,360 Speaker 1: why I think I should play Brian, you got to 226 00:12:46,400 --> 00:12:49,400 Speaker 1: do that, and then you got to stick with your word. 227 00:12:51,040 --> 00:12:57,240 Speaker 1: That's my answer. Next question, subject line says growing Closer 228 00:12:57,280 --> 00:12:59,760 Speaker 1: to God. Hey Granger, my name is Alex. I'm twenty 229 00:13:00,000 --> 00:13:03,480 Speaker 1: years old from Georgia, currently in college and recently single 230 00:13:03,480 --> 00:13:05,520 Speaker 1: after my girlfriend of three years broke up with me. 231 00:13:06,200 --> 00:13:08,480 Speaker 1: I believe in God and I've been chasing after him 232 00:13:08,520 --> 00:13:11,800 Speaker 1: to grow my relationship with him, and she just said 233 00:13:12,080 --> 00:13:14,320 Speaker 1: that I've changed and that's why she broke up with me. 234 00:13:14,920 --> 00:13:17,520 Speaker 1: I found an amazing community and surrounded myself with some 235 00:13:17,600 --> 00:13:20,720 Speaker 1: great friends that helped grow my relationship with Christ. My 236 00:13:20,800 --> 00:13:24,040 Speaker 1: question is what tips would you have for me to 237 00:13:24,120 --> 00:13:26,320 Speaker 1: keep setting my eyes on God and not worry about 238 00:13:26,320 --> 00:13:28,040 Speaker 1: the things of this world but to focus on the 239 00:13:28,040 --> 00:13:30,679 Speaker 1: things of Heaven. I love listening to the podcast. Thank 240 00:13:30,720 --> 00:13:34,680 Speaker 1: you so much for everything, Alex. Alex, thank you for 241 00:13:34,720 --> 00:13:38,200 Speaker 1: the email, Buddy, I appreciate you, bro, thanks for listening. 242 00:13:38,240 --> 00:13:42,959 Speaker 1: Twenty years old. Shout out to Georgia and I want 243 00:13:43,000 --> 00:13:44,560 Speaker 1: to If I was with you, I would ask you 244 00:13:44,600 --> 00:13:47,920 Speaker 1: this question. If we were face to face, I would say, Alex, 245 00:13:49,240 --> 00:13:51,760 Speaker 1: are you trying to get closer to God because your 246 00:13:51,760 --> 00:13:54,840 Speaker 1: girlfriend broke up with you and you want her back? 247 00:13:56,720 --> 00:14:01,480 Speaker 1: Maybe I can't totally read that from your email, but maybe, 248 00:14:01,640 --> 00:14:04,199 Speaker 1: And so that's the first question you have to answer. 249 00:14:04,640 --> 00:14:06,679 Speaker 1: Am I trying to get close to God for another 250 00:14:06,760 --> 00:14:09,640 Speaker 1: reason that I can get something out of this? Like 251 00:14:09,960 --> 00:14:12,040 Speaker 1: what's to benefit for me if I get closer to God? 252 00:14:12,040 --> 00:14:15,240 Speaker 1: And get the girl. That's the wrong way to do it. 253 00:14:16,640 --> 00:14:20,120 Speaker 1: There's other ways to get the girl, and I would 254 00:14:20,160 --> 00:14:25,560 Speaker 1: tell you it is completely irrelevant to getting closer to God. 255 00:14:27,120 --> 00:14:31,880 Speaker 1: So now we dig in to the original question. My 256 00:14:32,000 --> 00:14:33,800 Speaker 1: question is what tips would you have for me to 257 00:14:33,880 --> 00:14:36,840 Speaker 1: keep setting my eyes on God and not worry about 258 00:14:36,880 --> 00:14:38,840 Speaker 1: the things of this world but the focus on the 259 00:14:38,840 --> 00:14:41,520 Speaker 1: things of heaven. And then I want to back up 260 00:14:41,520 --> 00:14:44,600 Speaker 1: in your email when you said I believe in God 261 00:14:45,080 --> 00:14:47,200 Speaker 1: and I've been chasing after him to grow my relationship 262 00:14:47,240 --> 00:14:52,440 Speaker 1: with him. First of all, believing in God. Let me 263 00:14:52,480 --> 00:14:59,480 Speaker 1: tell you who else believes in God. Satan, demons believe 264 00:14:59,520 --> 00:15:06,200 Speaker 1: in God. There's a difference, right, can't I clarify that anymore? 265 00:15:06,840 --> 00:15:11,040 Speaker 1: Believing in God is the same thing that Satan does. 266 00:15:11,920 --> 00:15:18,520 Speaker 1: Of course, he believes in God sort of demons. So 267 00:15:18,560 --> 00:15:23,640 Speaker 1: there's more to it. We're looking for a relationship with Him, 268 00:15:23,840 --> 00:15:29,640 Speaker 1: a personal relationship with Jesus, and that comes with surrender. 269 00:15:30,160 --> 00:15:35,720 Speaker 1: Surrender means God. I can't I can't do this by myself. 270 00:15:36,480 --> 00:15:39,960 Speaker 1: I need your help. I need you to endwell in me, 271 00:15:40,360 --> 00:15:43,840 Speaker 1: spirit to come inside of me and give me a 272 00:15:43,880 --> 00:15:48,080 Speaker 1: new heart, a new nature, because I can't do it. 273 00:15:48,440 --> 00:15:52,120 Speaker 1: By myself. Everything you said in your email, Alex, everything 274 00:15:52,160 --> 00:15:55,320 Speaker 1: you said you want to get your chasing after God. 275 00:15:55,640 --> 00:15:58,040 Speaker 1: You want to work to get closer to God. You 276 00:15:58,080 --> 00:16:01,800 Speaker 1: want to grow your relationship with Christ. You want tips 277 00:16:01,920 --> 00:16:05,040 Speaker 1: on keep to how to keep setting your eyes on God. 278 00:16:06,200 --> 00:16:08,400 Speaker 1: All of those things are good things, but they happen 279 00:16:08,640 --> 00:16:12,440 Speaker 1: after you have a new nature, a new heart, after 280 00:16:12,520 --> 00:16:17,040 Speaker 1: the Holy Spirit dwells inside of you so richly that 281 00:16:17,040 --> 00:16:21,280 Speaker 1: that's the only thing that comes out. And how do 282 00:16:21,280 --> 00:16:23,000 Speaker 1: you know what's coming out? Because of the fruits of 283 00:16:23,040 --> 00:16:25,480 Speaker 1: your life. You'll see the fruits. You don't see the 284 00:16:25,480 --> 00:16:29,480 Speaker 1: fruits yet, not that's not a judgment. I was once 285 00:16:29,520 --> 00:16:33,880 Speaker 1: where you are, absolutely and I still am a wretched sinner. 286 00:16:33,920 --> 00:16:37,120 Speaker 1: You have to understand that. But when we have the 287 00:16:37,160 --> 00:16:41,160 Speaker 1: Holy Spirit dwelling inside of us, we don't want to 288 00:16:41,200 --> 00:16:43,840 Speaker 1: sin anymore. We want to be better, we want to 289 00:16:43,840 --> 00:16:45,600 Speaker 1: get closer, we want to set our eyes on God. 290 00:16:45,840 --> 00:16:49,160 Speaker 1: So are those are the results of the first transformation. 291 00:16:49,600 --> 00:16:53,320 Speaker 1: The first transformation happens when you go God, I can't 292 00:16:53,600 --> 00:16:57,360 Speaker 1: do it. And that's what the whole entire Old Testament 293 00:16:57,440 --> 00:17:01,200 Speaker 1: is about. Humans that can't do it, humans that can't 294 00:17:01,360 --> 00:17:04,240 Speaker 1: get closer to God. They can't keep their eyes set 295 00:17:04,320 --> 00:17:07,960 Speaker 1: on God. So God sends his only son to earth, 296 00:17:09,080 --> 00:17:12,080 Speaker 1: a perfect man that lived a perfect life, that fulfilled 297 00:17:12,119 --> 00:17:17,760 Speaker 1: the law that we couldn't fulfill. We couldn't do it, 298 00:17:18,080 --> 00:17:21,399 Speaker 1: not because it was bad, it was perfect. God made it. 299 00:17:21,400 --> 00:17:24,520 Speaker 1: It was perfect. The law was perfect, but we couldn't 300 00:17:24,520 --> 00:17:28,440 Speaker 1: do it. So God sent his son to be our savior, 301 00:17:28,480 --> 00:17:32,680 Speaker 1: to fulfill the law, to finish it perfectly. And those 302 00:17:32,680 --> 00:17:36,080 Speaker 1: of us that believe in him and his finished work. 303 00:17:37,520 --> 00:17:41,200 Speaker 1: He would then become a substitute for us and our 304 00:17:41,280 --> 00:17:45,680 Speaker 1: faulty ways and every way that we miss fulfilling the law. 305 00:17:45,840 --> 00:17:47,840 Speaker 1: He would become a substitute for us, so that when 306 00:17:47,840 --> 00:17:53,080 Speaker 1: God looks at us, he sees Christ in us, meaning 307 00:17:53,119 --> 00:17:59,320 Speaker 1: he looks at us and sees perfection, were perfect because 308 00:17:59,320 --> 00:18:02,120 Speaker 1: he's living a us. We find our worth through him, 309 00:18:02,440 --> 00:18:06,080 Speaker 1: not through ourselves. You can't do it, Alex, you can't 310 00:18:06,119 --> 00:18:10,240 Speaker 1: do it. So that's the first step. The first step 311 00:18:10,320 --> 00:18:16,840 Speaker 1: is God, I am my biggest problem. The solution is 312 00:18:16,840 --> 00:18:18,679 Speaker 1: not in me. Like the world. Once you tell you 313 00:18:18,720 --> 00:18:22,200 Speaker 1: that the solutions inside of you manifested out, you could 314 00:18:22,280 --> 00:18:25,399 Speaker 1: change the world from inside and the problem is outside 315 00:18:25,600 --> 00:18:29,119 Speaker 1: and you manifest and you have the power of change, 316 00:18:29,119 --> 00:18:31,879 Speaker 1: and then you manifest it out and you fix the world. 317 00:18:31,920 --> 00:18:35,399 Speaker 1: But the actual problem is in you. The Bible says, 318 00:18:35,440 --> 00:18:38,159 Speaker 1: the opposite of what the world says. The Bible says, 319 00:18:38,760 --> 00:18:42,400 Speaker 1: the problem is in us and the solution is outside. 320 00:18:43,040 --> 00:18:46,600 Speaker 1: So we go God, the problem's in me, So change me. 321 00:18:47,480 --> 00:18:50,040 Speaker 1: Give me a new heart, a new nature, to be 322 00:18:50,160 --> 00:18:53,600 Speaker 1: more like you. Come into me and live in me. 323 00:18:54,200 --> 00:18:59,280 Speaker 1: Teach me, show me, love me, discipline me, change me 324 00:19:00,160 --> 00:19:03,160 Speaker 1: to be new again. That's what you have to say. 325 00:19:03,200 --> 00:19:05,960 Speaker 1: That's the way, that's the path. It's the only way. 326 00:19:06,720 --> 00:19:09,919 Speaker 1: Jesus says, I Am the Way, the truth, and the life. 327 00:19:10,359 --> 00:19:15,000 Speaker 1: No one comes to the Father but through me. Okay, 328 00:19:16,080 --> 00:19:20,919 Speaker 1: So you need him in you, put up your hands 329 00:19:21,520 --> 00:19:30,000 Speaker 1: and surrender. I'll take a break. You're right back. Podcast 330 00:19:30,000 --> 00:19:32,919 Speaker 1: has brought to you all today by Movement That's MVMT. 331 00:19:33,520 --> 00:19:36,720 Speaker 1: In a tiny apartment in southern California, two college dropouts 332 00:19:36,720 --> 00:19:39,920 Speaker 1: teamed up to create a watch company that broke all 333 00:19:39,960 --> 00:19:44,760 Speaker 1: the rules with fair prices, unexpected colors, and clean original designs. 334 00:19:45,080 --> 00:19:49,639 Speaker 1: Movement MVMT grew into one of the fastest growing watch brands, 335 00:19:49,640 --> 00:19:52,520 Speaker 1: shipping to over one hundred and sixty countries across the globe. 336 00:19:52,680 --> 00:19:56,280 Speaker 1: Now movement has expanded into blue light glasses that protect 337 00:19:56,280 --> 00:20:00,480 Speaker 1: your eyes from the screens, minimalist jewelry, and more essential 338 00:20:00,560 --> 00:20:03,200 Speaker 1: styles that don't break the bank, all designed right out 339 00:20:03,200 --> 00:20:06,400 Speaker 1: of their California headquarters. I like to wear the Field watches. 340 00:20:06,520 --> 00:20:09,080 Speaker 1: They're kind of minimalist and they look like the old 341 00:20:09,200 --> 00:20:11,840 Speaker 1: Vietnam watches. They're really awesome, and I've been wearing a 342 00:20:11,840 --> 00:20:14,439 Speaker 1: lot of the blue light glasses when I'm working on 343 00:20:14,480 --> 00:20:17,159 Speaker 1: the podcast or after midnight looking at a lot of 344 00:20:17,200 --> 00:20:20,760 Speaker 1: screens doing music editing, and they're helping me out a lot. 345 00:20:21,080 --> 00:20:23,400 Speaker 1: Movement watches have the look and quality of a four 346 00:20:23,480 --> 00:20:25,679 Speaker 1: hundred to five hundred dollars watch that you're paying for 347 00:20:25,720 --> 00:20:28,639 Speaker 1: at the department store, but at a fraction of the cost. 348 00:20:28,800 --> 00:20:31,840 Speaker 1: Because they're built by one company in one place. You 349 00:20:31,840 --> 00:20:34,840 Speaker 1: get a beautiful watch shipped right to your door for free. Hey, 350 00:20:34,840 --> 00:20:36,240 Speaker 1: if you don't love it, you could ship it right 351 00:20:36,280 --> 00:20:39,080 Speaker 1: back for free. If you want to elevate your look 352 00:20:39,160 --> 00:20:42,000 Speaker 1: with styles that doesn't break the bank, then join the 353 00:20:42,040 --> 00:20:44,679 Speaker 1: movement and get fifteen percent off today with free shipping 354 00:20:44,720 --> 00:20:49,560 Speaker 1: and free returns by going to mvmt dot com slash granger. Again, 355 00:20:49,600 --> 00:20:57,800 Speaker 1: that's MVMT dot com slash granger. All right, let's get 356 00:20:57,800 --> 00:20:59,880 Speaker 1: back to the question. Subject line on this next one says, 357 00:21:00,080 --> 00:21:03,399 Speaker 1: when is the right time? Hey Granger, my name is William. 358 00:21:03,400 --> 00:21:06,280 Speaker 1: I'm twenty seven from Soul for Springs, Texas. I'm in 359 00:21:06,280 --> 00:21:08,639 Speaker 1: a relationship with a girl that I've known for almost 360 00:21:08,680 --> 00:21:11,200 Speaker 1: eight years now. We've dated a couple times in the past, 361 00:21:11,200 --> 00:21:14,240 Speaker 1: but the timing was never really right. We've been together 362 00:21:14,400 --> 00:21:18,000 Speaker 1: for three months this time. We've both made comments about 363 00:21:18,040 --> 00:21:20,439 Speaker 1: not wanting to be with anybody else and wanting to 364 00:21:20,480 --> 00:21:23,280 Speaker 1: be married. I know if I ask her to marry me, 365 00:21:23,320 --> 00:21:26,080 Speaker 1: she'll say yes. Should I wait until we are further 366 00:21:26,119 --> 00:21:29,479 Speaker 1: into the relationship or go ahead and do it? Thanks, 367 00:21:30,000 --> 00:21:34,320 Speaker 1: love your music, Love your podcast. Question comes from William 368 00:21:34,520 --> 00:21:36,720 Speaker 1: and Soul for Spring Shout out to my home state 369 00:21:36,760 --> 00:21:40,600 Speaker 1: of Texas. Twenty seven dating this girl known for eight years, 370 00:21:40,840 --> 00:21:44,919 Speaker 1: you know her pretty well, been together now for three months. 371 00:21:45,080 --> 00:21:48,800 Speaker 1: That's not a long time. That's not a problem. It's 372 00:21:48,880 --> 00:21:53,760 Speaker 1: just not a long time. Okay. So my question to 373 00:21:53,800 --> 00:21:59,359 Speaker 1: you is very simple. Do you love Jesus? William? Do 374 00:21:59,400 --> 00:22:03,840 Speaker 1: you love Jesus? If your answer is yes, is he 375 00:22:03,880 --> 00:22:06,200 Speaker 1: more valuable than anything else to you in your life? 376 00:22:06,280 --> 00:22:10,399 Speaker 1: If the answer is yes, then absolutely marry this girl. 377 00:22:10,560 --> 00:22:14,639 Speaker 1: Does she feel the same marrier? Ask her if you don't. 378 00:22:15,440 --> 00:22:17,280 Speaker 1: If the answer is I don't know. I don't think so, 379 00:22:17,520 --> 00:22:20,280 Speaker 1: maybe not, not really sure. If it's any of those, 380 00:22:21,000 --> 00:22:27,960 Speaker 1: you better wait because because if you follow the biblical 381 00:22:27,960 --> 00:22:33,040 Speaker 1: command of marriage, then you will not end up in divorce, 382 00:22:34,680 --> 00:22:36,119 Speaker 1: just saying, have you ever thought about that? Like, if 383 00:22:36,160 --> 00:22:39,520 Speaker 1: if we follow the biblical example of marriage and love, 384 00:22:40,040 --> 00:22:43,399 Speaker 1: if we follow that to a t of what love is, 385 00:22:44,240 --> 00:22:48,800 Speaker 1: it's selfless. If we follow what marriage is, the covenant, 386 00:22:48,800 --> 00:22:52,200 Speaker 1: the Holy Covenant of marriage. If we follow that example, 387 00:22:52,600 --> 00:22:56,600 Speaker 1: there is no divorce. It's impossible. Divorce always happens when 388 00:22:56,680 --> 00:23:01,679 Speaker 1: something gets broken in that somebody didn't follow something in 389 00:23:01,760 --> 00:23:07,159 Speaker 1: that you missed the mark somewhere, ending in divorce. So, 390 00:23:07,520 --> 00:23:09,480 Speaker 1: if you're on your own, you don't love Jesus, you're 391 00:23:09,520 --> 00:23:12,160 Speaker 1: not sure, that's kind of weird. Don't tell me that, granger, 392 00:23:13,280 --> 00:23:16,160 Speaker 1: Then buddy, you're on your own. Your guess is as 393 00:23:16,160 --> 00:23:20,960 Speaker 1: good as mine. I would say, it's a crapshoot. I 394 00:23:21,000 --> 00:23:22,919 Speaker 1: can't tell you. I don't know you. I don't know. 395 00:23:22,960 --> 00:23:28,800 Speaker 1: The girl sounds good on paper. She might be anybody 396 00:23:28,800 --> 00:23:32,639 Speaker 1: can fool anybody for a year. She's putting on her 397 00:23:32,680 --> 00:23:36,119 Speaker 1: best show. She's selling herself to you. You are selling 398 00:23:36,119 --> 00:23:39,760 Speaker 1: yourself to her. So at this point you're no better 399 00:23:40,000 --> 00:23:43,000 Speaker 1: than a used car salesman. That's me, that's anyone in 400 00:23:43,000 --> 00:23:45,240 Speaker 1: a relationship. At the beginning, you're no better than a 401 00:23:45,320 --> 00:23:49,560 Speaker 1: used car salesman showing the best car, showing all the 402 00:23:49,560 --> 00:23:53,480 Speaker 1: perfect angles and the pictures. You're not showing that this 403 00:23:53,560 --> 00:23:56,400 Speaker 1: car was in a wreck before. You're saying how good 404 00:23:56,400 --> 00:23:59,800 Speaker 1: the gas mileage is. You're giving the best example, but 405 00:23:59,840 --> 00:24:03,640 Speaker 1: it's as soon as you drive off the lot. Now 406 00:24:03,680 --> 00:24:05,159 Speaker 1: this car has been in a couple of recks. It 407 00:24:05,160 --> 00:24:09,280 Speaker 1: gets really bad gas mileage. The alignment's all funky, it's 408 00:24:09,320 --> 00:24:11,560 Speaker 1: got some weird dents in the back. You don't not 409 00:24:11,600 --> 00:24:14,320 Speaker 1: sure if it hit a deer or something. It's got 410 00:24:14,320 --> 00:24:16,639 Speaker 1: a smoke smell in it, like someone was a smoker 411 00:24:16,720 --> 00:24:20,399 Speaker 1: that had it before the truth comes out. So just 412 00:24:20,480 --> 00:24:23,399 Speaker 1: keep in mind you're selling a car right now, and 413 00:24:23,440 --> 00:24:27,119 Speaker 1: she's selling you her car. That's the best way to 414 00:24:27,119 --> 00:24:30,399 Speaker 1: put it. So as soon as you could figure that out, 415 00:24:30,600 --> 00:24:32,560 Speaker 1: what's the real car. Like now you've known it for 416 00:24:32,600 --> 00:24:34,879 Speaker 1: eight years. You might have an idea, but three months 417 00:24:34,920 --> 00:24:37,880 Speaker 1: is still that's still You're you're on the used car 418 00:24:37,880 --> 00:24:40,679 Speaker 1: a lot here in three months now, it's different. If 419 00:24:40,720 --> 00:24:43,320 Speaker 1: you love Jesus all your heart, he's number one in 420 00:24:43,359 --> 00:24:46,240 Speaker 1: your life, he's number one in her life. Three months 421 00:24:46,240 --> 00:24:49,440 Speaker 1: that's nothing. People used to get set up on arranged 422 00:24:49,480 --> 00:24:53,040 Speaker 1: marriages all the time and it worked fine. Just saying 423 00:24:54,359 --> 00:25:01,880 Speaker 1: that's very simple advice. But there it is. Let's move 424 00:25:01,880 --> 00:25:06,320 Speaker 1: on to the next question. This says, This comes from Jared, 425 00:25:06,800 --> 00:25:08,560 Speaker 1: and he says, my name is Jared. I'm from Maine, 426 00:25:09,160 --> 00:25:11,840 Speaker 1: just recently turned twenty five. I've always had the hardest 427 00:25:11,840 --> 00:25:15,280 Speaker 1: time having confidence in myself, whether it's with girls, trying 428 00:25:15,280 --> 00:25:18,480 Speaker 1: to be healthy, or with my faith. Also, since I've 429 00:25:18,480 --> 00:25:22,040 Speaker 1: turned twenty five, I've realized I don't know what kind 430 00:25:22,040 --> 00:25:25,000 Speaker 1: of man I'm supposed to be. This is an ongoing 431 00:25:25,040 --> 00:25:27,680 Speaker 1: struggle in my life and I'm tired of being this way. 432 00:25:28,280 --> 00:25:33,760 Speaker 1: Much love for your podcast, music and words of wisdom, Sincerely, Jared, Jared. Okay, 433 00:25:33,800 --> 00:25:35,440 Speaker 1: you kind of lead me down a path here, brother. 434 00:25:35,480 --> 00:25:38,520 Speaker 1: Thank you for the email. And you're a quarter of 435 00:25:38,560 --> 00:25:41,720 Speaker 1: a century old man, you're getting old, Just kidding. You're 436 00:25:41,720 --> 00:25:45,280 Speaker 1: not old, You're super young. But you kind of led 437 00:25:45,320 --> 00:25:46,920 Speaker 1: me down a path with one word. And so I'm 438 00:25:46,920 --> 00:25:49,920 Speaker 1: going to go there, and my longtime listeners know I'm 439 00:25:49,920 --> 00:25:52,600 Speaker 1: about to go here. But you said a word faith. 440 00:25:53,720 --> 00:25:58,359 Speaker 1: You said, I'm I'm struggling with girls, staying healthy and faith. 441 00:25:59,080 --> 00:26:02,080 Speaker 1: So just go to that word. Let's forget about girls 442 00:26:02,080 --> 00:26:05,119 Speaker 1: and staying healthy for a second. Let's talk about your faith. 443 00:26:06,200 --> 00:26:08,359 Speaker 1: Because if you want your true identity, you're not going 444 00:26:08,400 --> 00:26:10,800 Speaker 1: to find it. I can give you the secret of 445 00:26:10,840 --> 00:26:13,280 Speaker 1: life here. This is not crazy. How many people have 446 00:26:13,320 --> 00:26:14,879 Speaker 1: talked about the secret of life. I can give it 447 00:26:14,880 --> 00:26:19,280 Speaker 1: to you, the secret of life. As you find your 448 00:26:19,320 --> 00:26:22,119 Speaker 1: identity through Christ, and you will not find it on 449 00:26:22,160 --> 00:26:26,240 Speaker 1: this earth. He is our Savior, and one day every 450 00:26:26,359 --> 00:26:29,439 Speaker 1: knee will bow and every tongue will confess that he 451 00:26:29,520 --> 00:26:33,720 Speaker 1: is Lord. Whether you believe it now or not, every 452 00:26:33,760 --> 00:26:36,640 Speaker 1: single knee will bow and every tongue on earth will 453 00:26:36,680 --> 00:26:41,359 Speaker 1: confess that he is Lord. He's our creator. He made you. 454 00:26:42,440 --> 00:26:45,680 Speaker 1: Who better to tell you who you are and how 455 00:26:45,680 --> 00:26:50,359 Speaker 1: to be a man than your maker? How better would 456 00:26:50,359 --> 00:26:53,960 Speaker 1: you know if your car was sounding funny or acting 457 00:26:54,000 --> 00:26:56,840 Speaker 1: funny and you didn't totally know what was wrong with 458 00:26:56,880 --> 00:27:00,159 Speaker 1: your car. Who better to talk to than and the 459 00:27:00,200 --> 00:27:03,600 Speaker 1: automaker that made your car Because they built it with 460 00:27:03,640 --> 00:27:06,960 Speaker 1: their hands. They know every single nut and bolton, screw 461 00:27:07,040 --> 00:27:09,920 Speaker 1: and piece of metal that went into making that car. 462 00:27:10,440 --> 00:27:14,879 Speaker 1: That's God. He knows you better than you do because 463 00:27:14,920 --> 00:27:18,040 Speaker 1: He created you. So if you want to know who 464 00:27:18,080 --> 00:27:19,720 Speaker 1: you are, if you want to know how to be 465 00:27:19,760 --> 00:27:21,919 Speaker 1: a man, if you want to know what your purpose is, 466 00:27:22,200 --> 00:27:24,320 Speaker 1: if you want to know who your future wife is, 467 00:27:24,400 --> 00:27:26,840 Speaker 1: if you want to know how to stay healthy, you 468 00:27:26,880 --> 00:27:31,280 Speaker 1: go to your maker and you get on your knees 469 00:27:31,280 --> 00:27:35,480 Speaker 1: and you go, God, you made me. I'm tired of 470 00:27:35,520 --> 00:27:37,120 Speaker 1: trying to figure this out on my own. I'm trying 471 00:27:37,119 --> 00:27:40,800 Speaker 1: to try. Tired of going to philosophy and counseling and 472 00:27:41,920 --> 00:27:44,399 Speaker 1: all these people that try to tell me on social 473 00:27:44,520 --> 00:27:46,879 Speaker 1: media what it is to be a man, or what 474 00:27:46,920 --> 00:27:49,719 Speaker 1: it is to have a purpose, or what happiness is 475 00:27:49,720 --> 00:27:52,399 Speaker 1: in life. I'm tired of that because everyone's giving a 476 00:27:52,440 --> 00:27:55,920 Speaker 1: conflicted message and people have written about it for thousands 477 00:27:55,960 --> 00:27:58,320 Speaker 1: of years, but no one has a consensus and no 478 00:27:58,359 --> 00:28:04,320 Speaker 1: one has figured it out. Accept the Bible. The Bible 479 00:28:04,359 --> 00:28:07,240 Speaker 1: will give you a perfect example. It's our instruction manual. 480 00:28:09,160 --> 00:28:10,480 Speaker 1: Now I'm not saying you have to go right to 481 00:28:10,520 --> 00:28:12,040 Speaker 1: it and open it up to Genesis one. You might 482 00:28:12,040 --> 00:28:16,680 Speaker 1: not understand it. You probably won't, but you could open 483 00:28:16,760 --> 00:28:20,040 Speaker 1: up John one. Start at John one. In the beginning 484 00:28:20,119 --> 00:28:22,720 Speaker 1: was the Word, and the word was with God, and 485 00:28:22,760 --> 00:28:25,600 Speaker 1: the word was God. He was in the beginning with God. 486 00:28:26,320 --> 00:28:30,560 Speaker 1: Start there and slowly go forward, and you're going to 487 00:28:30,680 --> 00:28:38,760 Speaker 1: read the story of your life and your purpose clearly written. 488 00:28:39,040 --> 00:28:43,200 Speaker 1: And when you start aligning yourself with that purpose, everything 489 00:28:43,440 --> 00:28:47,120 Speaker 1: starts to make sense. You go, ah, that's why I'm here, 490 00:28:47,880 --> 00:28:51,080 Speaker 1: and you start acting upon it, you start walking in 491 00:28:51,160 --> 00:28:54,200 Speaker 1: that purpose, and you go this, Finally I feel peace. 492 00:28:56,240 --> 00:28:59,680 Speaker 1: Finally I have hope for my future. Finally I know 493 00:28:59,720 --> 00:29:04,200 Speaker 1: who I am. I finally know my identity and I 494 00:29:04,280 --> 00:29:07,600 Speaker 1: searched for so long and couldn't find it, And now 495 00:29:07,640 --> 00:29:10,520 Speaker 1: I know. Then I don't have to email a podcast 496 00:29:10,520 --> 00:29:13,120 Speaker 1: and ask I don't have to go to counseling or 497 00:29:13,160 --> 00:29:17,640 Speaker 1: therapy or go to podcasts and go to all these 498 00:29:18,000 --> 00:29:20,720 Speaker 1: self help speakers and look at their social media and 499 00:29:20,960 --> 00:29:24,240 Speaker 1: see these conflicting messages that doesn't totally make sense, Like 500 00:29:26,520 --> 00:29:31,240 Speaker 1: I find my identity through Christ. If that doesn't make 501 00:29:31,280 --> 00:29:38,120 Speaker 1: sense to you, that I understand the gospel's foolish for 502 00:29:38,200 --> 00:29:43,760 Speaker 1: those that are perishing. I once was that until you 503 00:29:43,840 --> 00:29:46,160 Speaker 1: dive in and you surrender. I said this earlier in 504 00:29:46,160 --> 00:29:49,960 Speaker 1: the podcast. God, I can't do this. I can't figure 505 00:29:50,000 --> 00:29:53,280 Speaker 1: it out, having trouble on every piece of my life, 506 00:29:53,600 --> 00:29:58,600 Speaker 1: whether it's relationships or health or social or making friends 507 00:29:59,280 --> 00:30:01,560 Speaker 1: or struggling so with my faith. I'm trying to figure 508 00:30:01,560 --> 00:30:03,360 Speaker 1: out all this stuff like a big puzzle, and I 509 00:30:03,400 --> 00:30:05,280 Speaker 1: don't even know where the first piece of it is. 510 00:30:07,440 --> 00:30:15,960 Speaker 1: And God goes, yeah, surrender. I will show you. There 511 00:30:16,040 --> 00:30:20,600 Speaker 1: is no better advice for this question than what I 512 00:30:20,720 --> 00:30:22,920 Speaker 1: just gave you. And it doesn't come from me. It 513 00:30:22,960 --> 00:30:25,000 Speaker 1: doesn't come from my own brain or my own heart. 514 00:30:25,320 --> 00:30:29,760 Speaker 1: I didn't make it up. I'm following in the footsteps 515 00:30:30,160 --> 00:30:33,360 Speaker 1: of many in the faith that I've found it right 516 00:30:33,640 --> 00:30:39,000 Speaker 1: here in the Gospel of Jesus Christ. I want to 517 00:30:39,080 --> 00:30:43,240 Speaker 1: roll with that today, guys. Next question has no subject. 518 00:30:43,320 --> 00:30:45,560 Speaker 1: It says, so I dated this girl for two years 519 00:30:45,560 --> 00:30:47,200 Speaker 1: and I truly thought she was the one, but we 520 00:30:47,280 --> 00:30:50,160 Speaker 1: broke up. Now she has a new boyfriend shortly after. 521 00:30:50,600 --> 00:30:52,920 Speaker 1: But I've tried dating, and I can never get it 522 00:30:52,960 --> 00:30:56,920 Speaker 1: to work with anybody else. I'm basically lost. Question mark, 523 00:30:57,880 --> 00:31:03,520 Speaker 1: I'm basically lost. This question comes from Zach with no subject, 524 00:31:03,680 --> 00:31:05,320 Speaker 1: and I don't know where you're from, Zach, but thank 525 00:31:05,320 --> 00:31:08,000 Speaker 1: you for emailing. Brother. I'm sorry for your loss and 526 00:31:08,040 --> 00:31:11,120 Speaker 1: your heartbreak. This girl you did it for two years. 527 00:31:11,200 --> 00:31:13,800 Speaker 1: You thought she was the one. Now she has somebody new. 528 00:31:15,040 --> 00:31:19,880 Speaker 1: I'll say this as lightly as I can, Zach, this 529 00:31:19,960 --> 00:31:23,960 Speaker 1: is the story of heartbreak. You were not alone. You 530 00:31:24,040 --> 00:31:27,800 Speaker 1: follow the footsteps of millions and billions of others that 531 00:31:27,840 --> 00:31:32,080 Speaker 1: have felt just this, including me, including most people that 532 00:31:32,120 --> 00:31:36,920 Speaker 1: have listened. This is heartbreak. I know it hurts, I 533 00:31:36,960 --> 00:31:40,320 Speaker 1: know it's tough, but that's what you're experiencing. As soon 534 00:31:40,320 --> 00:31:44,480 Speaker 1: as you recognize that's what you're experiencing. Oh, this is heartbreak. 535 00:31:45,560 --> 00:31:47,800 Speaker 1: This is that aching feeling. This is why I can't 536 00:31:47,800 --> 00:31:50,520 Speaker 1: sleep and I can't eat, and my knees are weak, 537 00:31:50,680 --> 00:31:52,360 Speaker 1: and I don't know what to do and I feel 538 00:31:52,480 --> 00:31:55,440 Speaker 1: desperate and all I could do is stalker on Facebook. 539 00:31:55,960 --> 00:32:00,600 Speaker 1: It's heartbreak. Recognize that you have a sickness. So once 540 00:32:00,640 --> 00:32:02,760 Speaker 1: you recognize the sickness, it's kind of like, Okay, look, 541 00:32:02,840 --> 00:32:04,760 Speaker 1: let's use COVID as an example. We all know that 542 00:32:04,760 --> 00:32:08,360 Speaker 1: it's fresh on our minds. Imagine if you started losing 543 00:32:08,400 --> 00:32:13,520 Speaker 1: your taste and you were you had a fever, and 544 00:32:13,560 --> 00:32:17,320 Speaker 1: you lost your sense of smell, and you were achy 545 00:32:17,520 --> 00:32:19,680 Speaker 1: and tired, and you had a sore throat and a cough. 546 00:32:20,120 --> 00:32:23,040 Speaker 1: Imagine if you didn't know anything about COVID or any 547 00:32:23,080 --> 00:32:27,440 Speaker 1: other sickness, and you're going, something's wrong with me. My 548 00:32:27,600 --> 00:32:30,520 Speaker 1: throat hurts and I've lost It's so weird. I lost 549 00:32:30,520 --> 00:32:33,880 Speaker 1: my tense, my sense of taste and smell, and I 550 00:32:33,920 --> 00:32:36,520 Speaker 1: feel tired all the time, and I don't know what 551 00:32:36,640 --> 00:32:39,520 Speaker 1: should I do. And then someone goes, oh, you have COVID. 552 00:32:40,120 --> 00:32:44,040 Speaker 1: It's going to go away in about a week. And 553 00:32:44,120 --> 00:32:48,320 Speaker 1: you go, oh, what do I have to do to 554 00:32:48,360 --> 00:32:50,640 Speaker 1: do that? And it's like, no, just be still, just 555 00:32:50,720 --> 00:32:54,480 Speaker 1: wait it out, get some rest, waited out, and then 556 00:32:54,480 --> 00:33:00,280 Speaker 1: I'm good. Yeah, yeah, then you're totally good. Oh, So, 557 00:33:00,440 --> 00:33:04,200 Speaker 1: realizing the moment you realize you have COVID, A there's 558 00:33:04,240 --> 00:33:07,360 Speaker 1: a whole bunch of anxiety that just goes away when 559 00:33:07,400 --> 00:33:09,960 Speaker 1: you know you have COVID. Oh that's what this is, 560 00:33:10,400 --> 00:33:14,040 Speaker 1: or strap throat or a broken arm. Put anything in 561 00:33:14,160 --> 00:33:21,040 Speaker 1: that box. Heartbreak. You have heartbreak, Zach Oh, I've got heartbreak. 562 00:33:21,040 --> 00:33:23,120 Speaker 1: That's why I feel crazy right now. I feel like 563 00:33:23,120 --> 00:33:25,760 Speaker 1: a stalker because I can't sleep at night, and I 564 00:33:25,760 --> 00:33:27,480 Speaker 1: get up and I open up Facebook and I look 565 00:33:27,480 --> 00:33:28,920 Speaker 1: at her and I realize she has a boyfriend, and 566 00:33:28,960 --> 00:33:30,880 Speaker 1: I can't stop looking at their pictures, and I'm trying 567 00:33:30,880 --> 00:33:32,600 Speaker 1: to figure out if they're more happy than she was 568 00:33:32,640 --> 00:33:38,280 Speaker 1: happy with me. You got heartbreak? Oh, that's a sickness. 569 00:33:38,720 --> 00:33:43,760 Speaker 1: What do I do? Wait? Unlike COVID, is not going 570 00:33:43,800 --> 00:33:45,200 Speaker 1: to take you just a few days to get over. 571 00:33:45,240 --> 00:33:48,600 Speaker 1: It's going to take you months. Some people that email 572 00:33:48,640 --> 00:33:51,720 Speaker 1: this podcast, it take some eight, nine, ten, eleven months, 573 00:33:52,240 --> 00:33:58,280 Speaker 1: some people a few weeks. Everybody's different. Usually the length 574 00:33:58,360 --> 00:34:01,520 Speaker 1: of heartbreak that you're going to have relates to how 575 00:34:01,600 --> 00:34:06,120 Speaker 1: much you loved. So, if you loved a lot, she 576 00:34:06,280 --> 00:34:08,680 Speaker 1: was the one. She was the one you're going to 577 00:34:08,719 --> 00:34:10,640 Speaker 1: spend the rest of your life with. All you thought 578 00:34:10,680 --> 00:34:14,640 Speaker 1: about was her. You're crazy about her over the moon. Oh, 579 00:34:14,680 --> 00:34:18,759 Speaker 1: that's going to be a longer process of heartbreak. She 580 00:34:18,880 --> 00:34:21,000 Speaker 1: was pretty new. You kind of dug her. This was good. 581 00:34:21,280 --> 00:34:24,520 Speaker 1: You're good friends with her. She cut it off. Wasn't 582 00:34:24,560 --> 00:34:26,640 Speaker 1: that big a deal. Now we're talking a few weeks. 583 00:34:28,800 --> 00:34:32,359 Speaker 1: So hey, if you're truly hurting really bad, that means 584 00:34:32,360 --> 00:34:33,520 Speaker 1: you loved her a lot. That means you have a 585 00:34:33,560 --> 00:34:36,279 Speaker 1: high capacity of love. That's pretty cool. It means you're 586 00:34:36,320 --> 00:34:38,279 Speaker 1: a passionate person. It means you're going to give that 587 00:34:38,280 --> 00:34:43,800 Speaker 1: to someone else, and you will find someone else. Thousands 588 00:34:43,800 --> 00:34:47,200 Speaker 1: of people listen to this podcast and have gone through 589 00:34:47,239 --> 00:34:50,680 Speaker 1: this and then found somebody else. Now, you learn a 590 00:34:50,719 --> 00:34:52,960 Speaker 1: little bit every time you go through relationship and it 591 00:34:53,000 --> 00:34:56,640 Speaker 1: doesn't work, which relationships fail one hundred percent of the 592 00:34:56,640 --> 00:35:00,359 Speaker 1: time until you find the one you marry, and then 593 00:35:00,600 --> 00:35:03,520 Speaker 1: some people still fail that I understand that, but you 594 00:35:03,560 --> 00:35:06,000 Speaker 1: get my point. So that means that you learn a 595 00:35:06,000 --> 00:35:08,799 Speaker 1: little bit from every failed relationship and you take a 596 00:35:08,840 --> 00:35:11,200 Speaker 1: little bit of that pain with you to the next 597 00:35:11,200 --> 00:35:14,759 Speaker 1: one in a good way because you learn from it. 598 00:35:14,760 --> 00:35:17,600 Speaker 1: It's like, oh, I messed up here and I did this, 599 00:35:17,680 --> 00:35:19,400 Speaker 1: and I shouldn't have said this, and I should have 600 00:35:19,480 --> 00:35:24,319 Speaker 1: said this, I should have done this. More So you 601 00:35:24,400 --> 00:35:26,680 Speaker 1: take a little bit of that into the next relationship, 602 00:35:27,120 --> 00:35:29,600 Speaker 1: and then the new girl benefits from it because she's like, well, 603 00:35:29,640 --> 00:35:33,680 Speaker 1: this guy's great, he's considerate, he remembers things, he tells 604 00:35:33,719 --> 00:35:36,879 Speaker 1: me how he feels. And you're thinking, yeah, I learned 605 00:35:36,880 --> 00:35:40,279 Speaker 1: all that because I failed so many times with other girls, 606 00:35:40,880 --> 00:35:43,480 Speaker 1: so the new one benefits from it. That doesn't make 607 00:35:43,520 --> 00:35:46,080 Speaker 1: this heartbreak easier, buddy. I'm so sorry you're going through it. 608 00:35:46,120 --> 00:35:52,320 Speaker 1: But the recipe wait, wait, you'll get you'll get better. 609 00:35:56,120 --> 00:36:00,360 Speaker 1: Next question, says podcast advice. Please, Hey, Graindeer, like to 610 00:36:00,400 --> 00:36:03,760 Speaker 1: remain anonymous if you could. I'm looking for some advice. 611 00:36:03,960 --> 00:36:07,040 Speaker 1: I'm a young, twenty seven year old professional horse trainer. 612 00:36:07,120 --> 00:36:09,200 Speaker 1: I love my job. It's all I've ever dreamed of 613 00:36:09,200 --> 00:36:11,640 Speaker 1: being since I was a little girl. And I'm sure 614 00:36:11,680 --> 00:36:15,000 Speaker 1: you know in the horse industry is my lifestyle, and 615 00:36:15,040 --> 00:36:18,080 Speaker 1: it's just it's not just a nine to five. My 616 00:36:18,160 --> 00:36:21,400 Speaker 1: first problem is I've been dating my boyfriend for almost 617 00:36:21,400 --> 00:36:24,120 Speaker 1: five years now and he doesn't understand this lifestyle at all. 618 00:36:24,280 --> 00:36:27,920 Speaker 1: Constantly makes me feel like chasing my dreams is a 619 00:36:27,920 --> 00:36:31,160 Speaker 1: bad thing and he should be the most important thing 620 00:36:31,200 --> 00:36:33,440 Speaker 1: in my life. And he has more than once asked 621 00:36:33,440 --> 00:36:35,400 Speaker 1: me to try to find a different job and career 622 00:36:35,760 --> 00:36:38,879 Speaker 1: that's not so demanding. I'm just not willing to do that. 623 00:36:39,040 --> 00:36:41,480 Speaker 1: My second problem is I think he's ready for marriage 624 00:36:41,480 --> 00:36:43,600 Speaker 1: and I'm not. He wants a wife to stay at 625 00:36:43,600 --> 00:36:47,200 Speaker 1: home and be a mom, and that's just not me. 626 00:36:48,800 --> 00:36:51,960 Speaker 1: He's kind of right. My lifestyle is demanding and it 627 00:36:52,040 --> 00:36:53,880 Speaker 1: is a lot for someone to take in that's not 628 00:36:54,160 --> 00:36:56,200 Speaker 1: a part of this industry. So I understand where he's 629 00:36:56,239 --> 00:37:00,200 Speaker 1: coming from. But that doesn't make it doesn't make me 630 00:37:00,239 --> 00:37:02,560 Speaker 1: a bad partner for not being willing to give up 631 00:37:02,560 --> 00:37:05,319 Speaker 1: my dreams and career to make him happy, or am 632 00:37:05,360 --> 00:37:07,680 Speaker 1: I just not in the right relationship? Thanks so much, 633 00:37:07,719 --> 00:37:13,760 Speaker 1: love music in your podcast. Okay, yeah, Anonymous, I've got 634 00:37:15,320 --> 00:37:20,719 Speaker 1: I've got two words for you, break up. This is 635 00:37:20,880 --> 00:37:24,120 Speaker 1: this is the episode of the two words, except this one. 636 00:37:24,160 --> 00:37:26,200 Speaker 1: This one isn't move out unless you're living with him. 637 00:37:26,440 --> 00:37:28,319 Speaker 1: I hope you're not living with him. That makes it 638 00:37:28,400 --> 00:37:32,239 Speaker 1: more difficult and more complicated. If that's the case, move out. 639 00:37:32,320 --> 00:37:34,400 Speaker 1: But if that's not the case, break up. Those are 640 00:37:34,400 --> 00:37:38,040 Speaker 1: the two words for you, Anonymous, break up. Period. Don't 641 00:37:38,080 --> 00:37:41,680 Speaker 1: fight for this. The guy want. The guy wants something 642 00:37:41,719 --> 00:37:45,359 Speaker 1: that you're not. He wants, he wants, he wants, that's 643 00:37:45,440 --> 00:37:48,279 Speaker 1: human nature. We want, we want. All he wants is 644 00:37:48,320 --> 00:37:51,400 Speaker 1: to be filled. He wants you to be his dream girl, 645 00:37:52,800 --> 00:37:55,520 Speaker 1: and you might look like her and you might talk 646 00:37:55,600 --> 00:37:59,120 Speaker 1: like her sometimes, but you're not. And that's why he's 647 00:37:59,160 --> 00:38:02,040 Speaker 1: trying to mold you into something that you're not. He's 648 00:38:02,040 --> 00:38:04,279 Speaker 1: trying to put this square peg in a round hole, 649 00:38:04,320 --> 00:38:09,200 Speaker 1: and you're not that peg. Okay, you're not as dream girl. 650 00:38:09,719 --> 00:38:11,759 Speaker 1: You're not going to be He's not going to learn 651 00:38:11,840 --> 00:38:14,680 Speaker 1: to love horse training. He's not going to learn to 652 00:38:14,800 --> 00:38:18,200 Speaker 1: accept that you're a horse trainer and that's your biggest passion. Now. 653 00:38:18,280 --> 00:38:21,319 Speaker 1: You might one day decide to be a mom, and 654 00:38:21,400 --> 00:38:23,080 Speaker 1: you might one day want you're a mom, and you 655 00:38:23,120 --> 00:38:25,239 Speaker 1: see how beautiful those babies are, you might want to 656 00:38:25,280 --> 00:38:28,640 Speaker 1: stay home with them, but that's irrelevant because you don't 657 00:38:28,640 --> 00:38:31,000 Speaker 1: want that right now, and he wants you to be 658 00:38:31,120 --> 00:38:33,440 Speaker 1: that right now, and he wants to get married right now, 659 00:38:33,480 --> 00:38:37,120 Speaker 1: and you don't want any of that. Break up, This 660 00:38:37,160 --> 00:38:39,880 Speaker 1: is not going to get any better. You're not going 661 00:38:39,960 --> 00:38:43,319 Speaker 1: to convince him, and you can't just be comfortable because 662 00:38:43,360 --> 00:38:45,799 Speaker 1: you're in a relationship and it's like, well, I love 663 00:38:45,840 --> 00:38:47,600 Speaker 1: horse training and I don't want I don't want any 664 00:38:47,600 --> 00:38:50,400 Speaker 1: of the things that he wants from me. Maybe we 665 00:38:50,840 --> 00:38:52,920 Speaker 1: both like Italian food and we like the same kind 666 00:38:52,920 --> 00:38:55,279 Speaker 1: of movies. But I don't really want to break up, 667 00:38:55,360 --> 00:38:58,560 Speaker 1: because then I'm single, and then dating's a mess, and 668 00:38:58,640 --> 00:39:00,320 Speaker 1: I don't really want to get into the dating world, 669 00:39:00,400 --> 00:39:02,239 Speaker 1: and that's rough, and I'd rather just be in a 670 00:39:02,280 --> 00:39:05,160 Speaker 1: relationship that's not that good than to go back to 671 00:39:05,200 --> 00:39:09,839 Speaker 1: that icky dating world. I don't want that. Don't think 672 00:39:09,960 --> 00:39:17,040 Speaker 1: like that. It's better to be single and confident than 673 00:39:17,040 --> 00:39:19,680 Speaker 1: to be in some relationship that you're trying to be 674 00:39:19,800 --> 00:39:23,240 Speaker 1: someone that you're not. He's trying to make you into something. 675 00:39:23,280 --> 00:39:26,640 Speaker 1: You're not gonna be that girl, not for him. He's 676 00:39:26,680 --> 00:39:29,680 Speaker 1: gonna find her. He probably will. He'll find the exact 677 00:39:29,719 --> 00:39:32,400 Speaker 1: girl for him, the girl that loves him more than 678 00:39:32,440 --> 00:39:35,560 Speaker 1: any career and stays at home and raises his babies. 679 00:39:35,840 --> 00:39:37,560 Speaker 1: And that's not a bad thing that he wants that, 680 00:39:37,680 --> 00:39:41,759 Speaker 1: you see, it's just not you. You're gonna need a 681 00:39:41,760 --> 00:39:44,720 Speaker 1: guy that goes, hey, I got a career. I'm pretty busy, 682 00:39:44,800 --> 00:39:47,200 Speaker 1: you're pretty busy. I'll meet you in the middle, and 683 00:39:47,239 --> 00:39:49,920 Speaker 1: this is gonna be fun. I'm an independent guy, you're 684 00:39:49,960 --> 00:39:52,840 Speaker 1: an independent girl. I'm not needy. I don't need you 685 00:39:52,920 --> 00:39:55,120 Speaker 1: to worship me in any way, So go do the 686 00:39:55,160 --> 00:39:57,719 Speaker 1: horse thing. I'll go do my job thing. I'll meet 687 00:39:57,719 --> 00:40:02,080 Speaker 1: you here tonight. We'll catch a movie together. You'll find 688 00:40:02,120 --> 00:40:06,080 Speaker 1: that that's just different personalities out there. You'll find that 689 00:40:06,160 --> 00:40:08,960 Speaker 1: kind of guy. But this one isn't him and you're 690 00:40:09,000 --> 00:40:13,719 Speaker 1: not hert for him either. Break up, breakup. It'll hurt 691 00:40:13,719 --> 00:40:16,799 Speaker 1: it first. You'll get scared being single. Oh, it's a 692 00:40:16,800 --> 00:40:20,719 Speaker 1: big world out there. You'll be okay. Just like I 693 00:40:20,719 --> 00:40:26,080 Speaker 1: told the last guy, just wait, it'll pass. You'll be happy. 694 00:40:26,120 --> 00:40:30,279 Speaker 1: You'll find somebody. That's all today. Love you guys, See 695 00:40:30,320 --> 00:40:32,719 Speaker 1: you next Monday. Gig, thanks for joining me on the 696 00:40:32,760 --> 00:40:35,960 Speaker 1: Granger Smith Podcast. I appreciate all of you. Guys. You 697 00:40:35,960 --> 00:40:38,839 Speaker 1: could help me out by rating this podcast on iTunes. 698 00:40:39,120 --> 00:40:42,200 Speaker 1: If you're on YouTube, subscribe to this channel, hit that 699 00:40:42,239 --> 00:40:45,640 Speaker 1: little like button and notification spell so that you never 700 00:40:45,760 --> 00:40:49,120 Speaker 1: miss anytime I upload a video. If you have a 701 00:40:49,200 --> 00:40:51,160 Speaker 1: question for me that you would like me to answer, 702 00:40:51,560 --> 00:40:56,399 Speaker 1: email Grangersmith Podcast at gmail dot com. Yig