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Speaker 1: Mm from grandmothers who whispered in their baby girl in

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Speaker 1: two fathers on dimly lit street corners, instructing young soldiers

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Speaker 1: to always keep their eyes open. You be queen, you

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Speaker 1: were fired. You will pass through centuries on the hands

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Speaker 1: of your daughters. They called you wisdom. Proverbs on the

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Speaker 1: backs of diamond eyed school children who growing into hymnals

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Speaker 1: recited by amethyst holding urban philosophers who recited neighborhood commandments

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Speaker 1: out of the windows of restored alchimedo chariots. To keep

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Speaker 1: the warmth of their blood, be wise, be smart, being black,

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Speaker 1: Opal Brown courts, bloodstone and prayer. Be every form of

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Speaker 1: Jim se King told, scribe, scribe, told son, son, told wife,

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Speaker 1: wife told her daughter, and daughter told the ass. This

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Speaker 1: is at the ancestors told me that you would come

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Speaker 1: to give wisdom thousands. They said you would come Dropping rope. Hey,

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Speaker 1: welcome back to another episode of the Dropping Jim's podcast.

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Speaker 1: I'm your host Debbie Brown. Today I have a really, really,

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Speaker 1: really special guest on the show, and I'm not trying

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Speaker 1: to like overhype it or be dramatic. Anybody that has

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Speaker 1: been on the show thus far, as you know, is

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Speaker 1: a friend and someone that I deeply, deeply respect. But

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Speaker 1: this person on the show today is honestly one of

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Speaker 1: my favorite human beings of all time. No, I am

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Speaker 1: fascinated by him as a person. Um. I'm highly entertained

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Speaker 1: by him in his musical offerings and in his I

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Speaker 1: G stories. Um. And this person is just someone I've

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Speaker 1: known for a very very long time. Award winning, Grammy nominated,

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Speaker 1: many albums, different gifts to the culture. The One and

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Speaker 1: Only Schoolboy que is on the show. What What Up?

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Speaker 1: What Up? I've known you for a long time, Yeah,

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Speaker 1: a few years, man, Like I really like we probably

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Speaker 1: met like right at the start of your career with

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Speaker 1: t D. Yeah that was like two thousand nine or

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Speaker 1: something like that, Yeah, two thousand seven. But I didn't

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Speaker 1: really like, you know, rap until like two thousand nine. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: but you were chilling, you were around. I definitely met

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Speaker 1: you before you dropped music, like not not music music,

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Speaker 1: because you had a first mixtape before you started with TD,

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Speaker 1: but before for sure, before like setbacks. Yeah, yeah, yeah,

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Speaker 1: for sure, for sure, before Setbacks. Yeah, it was it was.

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Speaker 1: It wasn't an old something, it was something for sure.

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Speaker 1: And I think, like the reason I feel I don't know.

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Speaker 1: I just feel happy about you, like when I see

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Speaker 1: you doing things, because you know, I feel like I've

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Speaker 1: seen you at a lot of different evolutions stages of yourself,

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Speaker 1: you know. Thank you. Um. And there was a time, honestly,

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Speaker 1: there was a time where like I had I forget

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Speaker 1: you had came on my show somewhere. This is years ago,

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Speaker 1: I think this is, um the first time I was

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Speaker 1: in Houston, at the first radio station I was at,

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Speaker 1: and I honestly was like a little scared real yeah,

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Speaker 1: because I mean you had always up until that point

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Speaker 1: been pretty quiet, but it just seemed like something was dark.

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Speaker 1: Oh yeah, I probably was. I was just on so

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Speaker 1: many drugs though, yeah, like you know, um yeah, I

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Speaker 1: was like doing pills and sipping lean before it was

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Speaker 1: like a like a cool thing, you know, Like my

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Speaker 1: whole first album was called Oxymoron, you know what I mean, Like, um,

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Speaker 1: before all this ship was like popular. Yeah, so it

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Speaker 1: was like, um, I was just so out of it,

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Speaker 1: like everywhere I went, I was. But I was always

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Speaker 1: me though, with my personality and who I am. But

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Speaker 1: it would be always something like I can look at

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Speaker 1: old interviews now and be like what or just look

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Speaker 1: at me just my appearance. Excuse me, my body tight,

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Speaker 1: my face like looking puffy, and like skin looks dull.

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Speaker 1: It's just it's like a lot of ship like like

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Speaker 1: I'm sorry I couldn't, but like I look completely different then,

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Speaker 1: uh like two years ago, Like even my skin. Everything's

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Speaker 1: just like just getting rid of that stuff just clears

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Speaker 1: you up and just you know, doing other things instead

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Speaker 1: of just going into the studio. Because once your life

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Speaker 1: become like a just hard work and you you never

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Speaker 1: really get to enjoy who you are as a person.

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Speaker 1: It can take you to a dark place. Because I

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Speaker 1: was just waking up and just sit around and just

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Speaker 1: get high until I go to the studio every night,

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Speaker 1: you know what I mean. I'm just looking at it.

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Speaker 1: It's like ship, I'm just working hard. I work hard

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Speaker 1: as a mother. I'm thinking, yeah, you work hard at something,

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Speaker 1: but you're also killing yourself, you know. At the same time,

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Speaker 1: It's like I sacrificed to get here. Yeah I worked hard,

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Speaker 1: and I still work hard every day now, but I

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Speaker 1: was killing myself in the process. So it was like

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Speaker 1: almost like I was never getting this high of the

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Speaker 1: success that I was always receiving. Like I never even

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Speaker 1: really understood being famous, Like it got to a point

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Speaker 1: where I got famous, like when I first came out,

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Speaker 1: like I wouldn't go nowhere and stuff like because it

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Speaker 1: was like I didn't get it. I was just too

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Speaker 1: high and I just didn't understand it. Yeah, you get

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Speaker 1: what I'm saying. I didn't understand it, Like bro, like

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Speaker 1: leave me alone. Like I used to be like irritated

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Speaker 1: all the time, like don't don't touch me, you don't

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Speaker 1: talk to me. Don't you get what I'm saying. I

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Speaker 1: was one of those people, like I asked, I wouldn't

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Speaker 1: take pictures like oh no, no, I always had my

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Speaker 1: head down and ship because I was just always high

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Speaker 1: and groggy. And it was probably like a mixture of things.

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Speaker 1: It's like it's the drugs, but then it's also this

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Speaker 1: you know, as as a young man coming from South Central,

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Speaker 1: coming from the background that you came from, now being

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Speaker 1: like on this world stage and receiving this constant attention people,

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Speaker 1: people communicating with you in a way that you weren't

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Speaker 1: used to from where you're from, right, Like people wanting

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Speaker 1: to touch you, and people always in your face, smiling

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Speaker 1: and posturing, and it was the kind of like you know,

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Speaker 1: the body language, the connection that you just don't have

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Speaker 1: growing up where you grew up. Yeah, and it's still

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Speaker 1: weird now, like just body language from people and like, uh,

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Speaker 1: just how how people can just approach you and just

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Speaker 1: be so rude you know, like, um, it could really

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Speaker 1: piss you off. You know, you gotta catch yourself some time,

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Speaker 1: like because some pion times people really do some things

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Speaker 1: that back in the day you would have fucked him

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Speaker 1: up big time for it. But it's like, you know,

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Speaker 1: you can't be out here just kicking people. Ask you

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Speaker 1: gotta understand, like you know, you know what I'm saying, Like,

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Speaker 1: you gotta understand, and some people are just that's when

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Speaker 1: I'll be I'll be realized a lot of things, Like

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Speaker 1: some people are just going to be there and there's

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Speaker 1: nothing you can really do about that. It's like everybody

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Speaker 1: not made to be um the same mindset as you.

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Speaker 1: Everybody's not here to be on alert about a lot

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Speaker 1: of ship you know what's going on. Some people are

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Speaker 1: just fucking idiots, and we need the idiots to let

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Speaker 1: me know how great we are. We really need a

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Speaker 1: bunch of idiots, dude, Like, um, we could try to

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Speaker 1: change the world, we could help people because I've been

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Speaker 1: an idiot before. I'm pretty sure you've been an idiot before,

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Speaker 1: and you wouldn't be here if he wasn't an idiot

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Speaker 1: at some point, Like you know what I mean. I

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Speaker 1: was telling I was telling my girlfriend today we were

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Speaker 1: on texting, like I've had to I've had to stop

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Speaker 1: watching and reading a lot of things because it's not

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Speaker 1: good for my mental health, like to be reminded in

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Speaker 1: every second of just how painful and difficult this world is. Right,

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Speaker 1: Like I can't focus on raising my baby with joy

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Speaker 1: if I'm constantly looking at videos of people dying or

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Speaker 1: people hurting um or or watching trolls say ship that

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Speaker 1: has absolutely no rationale to it. Um. But I was

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Speaker 1: telling my girlfriend, it's like, you know, to those people

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Speaker 1: like I just have to send the energy of compassion

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Speaker 1: because you are who you are just based on your

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Speaker 1: life experiences up to this point, and everybody grows at

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Speaker 1: different rates. And to be quite honest, in this lifetime,

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Speaker 1: not everybody is meant to be a good person. Not

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Speaker 1: everybody is meant to be great or to have deeper understanding,

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Speaker 1: Like some people are just the ignorant worker bees, you know,

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Speaker 1: like you just you're just they're existing but not really living. Um.

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Speaker 1: But I just I'm grateful that as as hard as

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Speaker 1: life is right now, Like I'm grateful that I'm alive

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Speaker 1: in this time because in this exact moment is better

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Speaker 1: than it's ever been in American history at least. You know,

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Speaker 1: we're having conversations we've never had, we have access to

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Speaker 1: healing that we've never had, And I just feel grateful.

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Speaker 1: I'm awake, I'm awaking aware man. Yeah, man, this ship

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Speaker 1: is really That's what I'm still hate about, Like this

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Speaker 1: time is like the race part about it, like the

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Speaker 1: divider in it, like um with everybody like um, you

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Speaker 1: know Mexicans and blacks, whites, blacks, Asians and Asians Like

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Speaker 1: my I got friends that that's Japanese that hate the

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Speaker 1: other side of the Asian people. Like he doesn't want

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Speaker 1: to hang around it, Like you give what I'm saying.

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Speaker 1: It's like, um, it seems like that is more. It

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Speaker 1: seems like that is is still the same. It's just um,

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Speaker 1: we have to we're forced to. Uh, A lot of

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Speaker 1: people are forced to deal with it. Yeah, I think

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Speaker 1: racism is still the same though, Oh absolutely, I think

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Speaker 1: it's still the same, and but what the reach that

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Speaker 1: it has is different. Like the hate people carrying, the

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Speaker 1: ignorance people carry is the same and in some cases

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Speaker 1: maybe even worse. UM, but the reach it's able to have,

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Speaker 1: in the effect it's able to have on our lives

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Speaker 1: has dramatically changed. Like for the most part, you know,

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Speaker 1: someone can feel however they feel, but they're not allowed

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Speaker 1: to touch me, you know, like they're not allowed to

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Speaker 1: oppress me in many ways. Right, there's still like some

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Speaker 1: of the greater like governmental and societal systematic racism that happens.

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Speaker 1: But and it also depends where you are. Like we're

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Speaker 1: in California, you know, we're in southern California, so we

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Speaker 1: have a lot of privilege in being in you know,

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Speaker 1: a very liberal place. It's crazy. I want to I

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Speaker 1: want to get back to UM you kind of sharing

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Speaker 1: your journey getting off drugs, Like what was the moment

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Speaker 1: for you? Because you know, when I say earlier that

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Speaker 1: it felt like there was a darkness what it What

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Speaker 1: I really mean by that is like there was a

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Speaker 1: time where I would be around you and it felt

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Speaker 1: almost like your soul was on mute, if that makes sense,

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Speaker 1: Like you were still like you were still like you know,

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Speaker 1: you were still nice that you'd be like, hey, what's up,

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Speaker 1: like you know, but it seemed like like yeah, like

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Speaker 1: you said, like you were probably just completely out of

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Speaker 1: your own head and and not feeling good from the

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Speaker 1: inside out. But but I felt it and then like

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Speaker 1: maybe and this is probably like eight to ten years ago,

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Speaker 1: but then I remember like five years ago I saw

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Speaker 1: you at the b ET Awards and you walked in

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Speaker 1: maybe four years ago you walked in and you were

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Speaker 1: so radiant, like yeah, like legitimately, like you had this

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Speaker 1: like light pouring out of you. You were smiling, and

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Speaker 1: I'm like, I've never seen this full smile in public,

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Speaker 1: Like you were smiling big. And I saw you and

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Speaker 1: you were and we were just both so happy to

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Speaker 1: see each other, and everything that you were saying just

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Speaker 1: radiated light. Like you were so grateful even for the

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Speaker 1: small things, like you were like I just got my

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Speaker 1: els back, man, Like life feels so good. Yeah, And

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Speaker 1: you know, it seemed like a lot of the toxins

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Speaker 1: were out of your system because you were very present.

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Speaker 1: You were clear, your eyes had this clearness about them, um,

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Speaker 1: and you were just experiencing joy and being present you know,

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Speaker 1: like I think you had just going to Hawaii and

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Speaker 1: I had like seen videos of you and you were

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Speaker 1: like living your best life, Like there was so much

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Speaker 1: you and your friends were jumping in the ocean and

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Speaker 1: I was like, who is this guy? Um? And then

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Speaker 1: you just seem to continue to like elevate and grow.

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Speaker 1: And you know, so when I say like you're one

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Speaker 1: of my favorite humans in existence, a lot of it is.

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Speaker 1: I mean, number one, you're my friends, So I think

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Speaker 1: you're dope. Um. I have a lot of respect for

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Speaker 1: what you do, but I'm really drawn to resilience in people,

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Speaker 1: like I'm really drawn to transformation, and for me, you

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Speaker 1: represent that and what you do give so much clarity

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Speaker 1: and hope, even if that's not your intention to so

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Speaker 1: many other people that look like you and have similar stories.

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Speaker 1: You know, like black men are not allowed to have

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Speaker 1: joy out loud. You know that too. You've always got

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Speaker 1: to hide so many things, Bro, you gotta hide who

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Speaker 1: you are, like even if you know the fact that

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Speaker 1: me being the Crib, I'm not supposed to be like

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Speaker 1: the type of person I am, like, uh, always laughing

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Speaker 1: and ship, always doing some funny ship, Like that's just

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Speaker 1: who I am bro, like you know, and like that's

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Speaker 1: part of game bang and that's all we do. Like

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Speaker 1: in the hood, right back in the day, is all

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Speaker 1: we used to do is just like crack jokes on

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Speaker 1: each other. That's all we did. Like to this day,

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Speaker 1: me and my homeboys, we're fucking grown us, third of

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Speaker 1: year old man, and we just still talk about each other,

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Speaker 1: like you give what I'm saying, Like all day, Like

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Speaker 1: we greet each other by each other's mama. Like my

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Speaker 1: homeboy Floyd, I call him Darlene as soon as I say,

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Speaker 1: you know what I mean, doesn't know, Like that's just

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Speaker 1: what we do, like you know, so like we just clowns,

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Speaker 1: like but when we go into public, we try to

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Speaker 1: hide it and we throw this whole tough thing on it.

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Speaker 1: It's like you know what I mean, It's like we

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Speaker 1: take away all the personality that we have. Like game

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Speaker 1: bangers could be some of the most game bangers are

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Speaker 1: some of the most talented people, creative people ever. Bro,

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Speaker 1: Like they snap in and out of different things and

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Speaker 1: in out out of situations. They have no fear, you

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Speaker 1: give what I'm saying. They some of the most different

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Speaker 1: type of creatures ever. That's why I think I was

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Speaker 1: blessed to game bang for a little for a time

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Speaker 1: in my of my life because it got me to

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Speaker 1: the point where I am now. I can blend in

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Speaker 1: with all all sides. Like game banging in sports made

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Speaker 1: me who I am today because I had to had

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Speaker 1: to be disciplined because I wanted to play football and

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Speaker 1: I wanted to play baseball. But I had the other

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Speaker 1: side of the undisciplined of the game bang inside of me.

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Speaker 1: You give what I'm saying, and I think it clashed

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Speaker 1: together with my music and who I am, and it

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Speaker 1: made me who I am today. You know what I'm saying, Like,

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Speaker 1: that's why I can hang with white people. I can

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Speaker 1: hang with like you know, like Mexicans and be cool,

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Speaker 1: or Asians and be cool any type of race or

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Speaker 1: whatever like a cornball. But you know what I mean,

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Speaker 1: give you that ability, because I think a lot of

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Speaker 1: people think of gang banging and parameters of it's not

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Speaker 1: something that would make you open to other kinds of people. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: that the sports made me open to kind of different

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Speaker 1: kinds of people. The game banging gave me that that

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Speaker 1: almost that cutthroat mentality. You give what I'm saying, Like killer,

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Speaker 1: be killed type of mentality, but the sports brought the

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Speaker 1: other side of it that it is actually not killed

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Speaker 1: to be killed. You know you do and you actually

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Speaker 1: do need somebody to help you win this game. You

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Speaker 1: give what I'm saying, quarterback, Yeah exactly. It's like I

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Speaker 1: know when to snip you off and I know when

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Speaker 1: to keep you around almost but like, um, yeah, that's

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Speaker 1: pretty much like gangbanging in sports. It just collided like

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Speaker 1: the balance of like personal boundaries but then also openness exactly.

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Speaker 1: Well you Like, I think a lot of people, especially

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Speaker 1: if you're not from l A or you're not a

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Speaker 1: person of color, Like people do not understand like gangbanging,

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Speaker 1: like they right right, I think, especially they don't understand

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Speaker 1: the depths of it, like like the blind loyalty in it,

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Speaker 1: you know, or the I guess, like I would say,

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Speaker 1: maybe the commitment to it. But more so like like

294
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Speaker 1: when you hear people speak about being a gang, it's

295
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Speaker 1: like this is my family. And for a lot of

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Speaker 1: people who don't have any they're not adjacent to it.

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Speaker 1: It's like what does that mean? Family? People are hurting

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Speaker 1: each other and you hurt people that look like you are,

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Speaker 1: Like what is the what's the depth of it, what's

300
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Speaker 1: the connection? I don't know, it's it's just something. It's

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00:16:57,040 --> 00:16:59,360
Speaker 1: like a commitment that once you commit to it's like

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00:16:59,480 --> 00:17:02,480
Speaker 1: being married. It's like once you commit to it, you can't.

303
00:17:03,920 --> 00:17:06,600
Speaker 1: Like I'm not a game banger, but I'm still committed

304
00:17:06,680 --> 00:17:09,119
Speaker 1: to being from Hoover, Like I'm still a crip. Like

305
00:17:09,800 --> 00:17:12,920
Speaker 1: I don't game bang, but I'm always a crip. Like

306
00:17:13,040 --> 00:17:15,239
Speaker 1: somebody asked me where I'm from, I'm still saying from

307
00:17:15,280 --> 00:17:18,320
Speaker 1: over crip. It's never where I say I don't bang.

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00:17:18,440 --> 00:17:21,520
Speaker 1: It's never never that you give what I'm saying. It's like,

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00:17:22,200 --> 00:17:24,440
Speaker 1: I don't know what it what it is, I just

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Speaker 1: did it. And um, the loyalty like you said the loyalty,

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Speaker 1: and the loyalty isself fake, like, um, homies kill homies

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Speaker 1: like more than the enemy would kill homie too, you

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Speaker 1: know what I'm saying. Like it's sad like um, jealousy.

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Speaker 1: But but you just that's the where you come from though,

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Speaker 1: you know, It's like I come from over here, and

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00:17:47,520 --> 00:17:51,239
Speaker 1: that's all you here at school at elementary, that's all

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00:17:51,320 --> 00:17:53,560
Speaker 1: your cousins is saying, that's all this is. And then

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00:17:53,640 --> 00:17:57,800
Speaker 1: you start losing friends your friend just died. He thirteen,

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00:17:58,280 --> 00:18:01,760
Speaker 1: like somebody just killed him or something. You like, you

320
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Speaker 1: know it was them over there. You give what I'm saying.

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Speaker 1: It's like, I mean, like what you know what I mean,

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Speaker 1: It's like it's you you you you you pretty much

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Speaker 1: forced to. It's like, I know I didn't have the

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Speaker 1: game bang, Like I didn't grow up like Section and

325
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Speaker 1: none of that ship, you know what I'm saying, like

326
00:18:21,400 --> 00:18:23,400
Speaker 1: food stamps, none of that ship. I didn't have none

327
00:18:23,400 --> 00:18:25,800
Speaker 1: of that ship. My mom was working and ship. She

328
00:18:25,960 --> 00:18:28,000
Speaker 1: was a single mom. I mean, we were still in

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Speaker 1: the ghetto. I mean it was in a bullshit as apartment,

330
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Speaker 1: still funked up, but I mean it was like emotional supporting,

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Speaker 1: That's what I'm saying. Like I still have some Jay's

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Speaker 1: every now and then. Still I had the video game.

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Speaker 1: My mom had a job, I'm saying, but we were

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00:18:42,720 --> 00:18:45,480
Speaker 1: just in the hood, funked up. So it's like, um,

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00:18:45,720 --> 00:18:48,119
Speaker 1: I did it because that's just what it was, Like

336
00:18:48,520 --> 00:18:50,840
Speaker 1: just what it is, this is where and like what

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00:18:50,920 --> 00:18:52,760
Speaker 1: I'm saying, like I can't explain it, that's just what

338
00:18:52,920 --> 00:18:55,920
Speaker 1: it was. Just like I'm here and that's it's no

339
00:18:56,080 --> 00:18:58,399
Speaker 1: turning back all it is. But what it is also

340
00:18:58,520 --> 00:19:00,920
Speaker 1: too when you first get into it, it it's like

341
00:19:01,040 --> 00:19:04,320
Speaker 1: a thing where you you just really just want to

342
00:19:04,359 --> 00:19:06,400
Speaker 1: be down with it because that's just that's just your

343
00:19:06,480 --> 00:19:09,080
Speaker 1: people and that's just your boys, and you just want

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00:19:09,119 --> 00:19:11,000
Speaker 1: to be down with it. And then it gets serious.

345
00:19:11,080 --> 00:19:13,000
Speaker 1: Like I said, you may go to jail, or you

346
00:19:13,119 --> 00:19:17,520
Speaker 1: may lose a friend. And then that's when they get serious.

347
00:19:18,400 --> 00:19:20,560
Speaker 1: Once you lose somebody, are you in the mall or something,

348
00:19:20,640 --> 00:19:23,160
Speaker 1: somebody asks you where you from? They beat the ship

349
00:19:23,280 --> 00:19:26,600
Speaker 1: out of you. Then you serious, you know you you

350
00:19:27,080 --> 00:19:29,320
Speaker 1: It takes the situations At first, you're just jumping in

351
00:19:29,480 --> 00:19:32,399
Speaker 1: blind like I'm with and I think to like the

352
00:19:32,520 --> 00:19:36,800
Speaker 1: understanding and the draw that people have when they're faced

353
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Speaker 1: with like joining a situation like that. I mean, gangs

354
00:19:40,200 --> 00:19:43,400
Speaker 1: were rooted originally and being something good, you know they were.

355
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Speaker 1: They were the offshoots of the Black Panther Party in

356
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Speaker 1: Los Angeles. They were created as a way to organize

357
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Speaker 1: the people closest to you in your community, you know,

358
00:19:53,800 --> 00:19:57,280
Speaker 1: tect you from the rapist, the the white folks. That's

359
00:19:57,320 --> 00:19:59,160
Speaker 1: what's back in the day is like in the fifties

360
00:19:59,200 --> 00:20:01,480
Speaker 1: and the sixties of black gangs. That was to keep

361
00:20:01,560 --> 00:20:04,199
Speaker 1: the the white folks from coming over there beating us

362
00:20:04,280 --> 00:20:07,560
Speaker 1: up and spitting on us and doing like as they

363
00:20:07,640 --> 00:20:09,159
Speaker 1: used to come back. They used to come through the

364
00:20:09,240 --> 00:20:11,880
Speaker 1: hoods and stuff wants to like around the black panther time,

365
00:20:12,880 --> 00:20:16,480
Speaker 1: you know, doing little mean things the kids and egging people,

366
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Speaker 1: you know what're doing ship that kids, teenager kids do.

367
00:20:20,720 --> 00:20:23,000
Speaker 1: But they were whiten, you know, because a couple of

368
00:20:23,000 --> 00:20:25,359
Speaker 1: inn words is going to be said. So it was

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00:20:25,480 --> 00:20:27,960
Speaker 1: it was really to protect that and write like I said,

370
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Speaker 1: rapists and people that's coming in your community trying to

371
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Speaker 1: break into your house. It's like, no, this is our community.

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Speaker 1: We're here, we're gonna police it because the cops are

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Speaker 1: gonna whoop our ass. Yeah, cops whooping our ass while

374
00:20:39,640 --> 00:20:43,119
Speaker 1: we're calling them, like calling them, we're going to police

375
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Speaker 1: our own area. That's where it were started, just policing

376
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Speaker 1: our own area. And it really it seems like when

377
00:20:49,240 --> 00:20:52,320
Speaker 1: the breakdown of the black family happened through crack, through

378
00:20:52,400 --> 00:20:54,840
Speaker 1: the government putting crack in the hood, it's like that's

379
00:20:54,920 --> 00:20:57,560
Speaker 1: where it got skewed and it began to kind of

380
00:20:57,680 --> 00:21:01,200
Speaker 1: morph into a bastardized verse another self that was not

381
00:21:01,440 --> 00:21:06,720
Speaker 1: necessarily beneficial to people, you know, because families started breaking down,

382
00:21:06,880 --> 00:21:09,320
Speaker 1: Like people were getting locked up for their entire lives

383
00:21:09,480 --> 00:21:14,639
Speaker 1: for small things. And really so many men were yanked

384
00:21:14,680 --> 00:21:18,440
Speaker 1: out of the area. You know, Um, so many people

385
00:21:18,520 --> 00:21:22,600
Speaker 1: in jail for weed. Right still still people in California

386
00:21:22,800 --> 00:21:27,760
Speaker 1: jet prison for weed. And it's like, whoa, it's legalized

387
00:21:27,840 --> 00:21:31,360
Speaker 1: every fucking We're now all over the West coast Oregon,

388
00:21:31,560 --> 00:21:36,719
Speaker 1: see Washington, California. Um, they're gonna get it through Arizona.

389
00:21:36,880 --> 00:21:41,159
Speaker 1: It's in Vegas. It's like I just walked into a

390
00:21:41,200 --> 00:21:43,200
Speaker 1: shop today to pick up something from my little pen

391
00:21:43,280 --> 00:21:47,120
Speaker 1: and it was like fancy. They were like THHC bath

392
00:21:47,200 --> 00:21:51,480
Speaker 1: bombs and you know, chocolates and make a whole household

393
00:21:51,520 --> 00:21:54,400
Speaker 1: of hamp or some ship and people have literally lost

394
00:21:54,480 --> 00:22:00,159
Speaker 1: their entire lives. We do like it's silly they they

395
00:22:00,240 --> 00:22:02,239
Speaker 1: bade these laws for us, Like you get what I'm

396
00:22:02,280 --> 00:22:06,720
Speaker 1: saying the crib notes for anybody listening that that maybe

397
00:22:06,720 --> 00:22:09,440
Speaker 1: it's kind of like what like I haven't experienced stuff

398
00:22:09,440 --> 00:22:14,480
Speaker 1: like that. Rent Bastards of the Party. That's a really

399
00:22:14,560 --> 00:22:21,280
Speaker 1: great documentary on gang banging. Um. I would also say, watch, um,

400
00:22:22,960 --> 00:22:26,200
Speaker 1: there's this there's this dope documentary to that. Um, what's

401
00:22:26,320 --> 00:22:28,679
Speaker 1: what's the guy? Oh? God, he's famous. I can't think

402
00:22:28,720 --> 00:22:31,600
Speaker 1: of him right now. Um. But it's about specifically the

403
00:22:31,640 --> 00:22:35,960
Speaker 1: California printing prison system and it's so deep. Um, I

404
00:22:36,040 --> 00:22:40,080
Speaker 1: forget what it's called. Yeah, okay, you know dude, he's

405
00:22:40,240 --> 00:22:43,800
Speaker 1: famous Latino actor. He has a bunch of taco shops

406
00:22:43,880 --> 00:22:47,040
Speaker 1: here in l A now, like businesses with the long

407
00:22:47,160 --> 00:22:55,240
Speaker 1: black hair he played. Yeah, okay, right now, I cannot

408
00:22:55,280 --> 00:22:58,879
Speaker 1: remember the name of this documentary, but Danny Treyhoe is

409
00:22:58,960 --> 00:23:00,840
Speaker 1: behind it and he near rates it and it's on

410
00:23:01,000 --> 00:23:04,720
Speaker 1: iTunes and it's fire. So google that and if I remember,

411
00:23:04,760 --> 00:23:06,840
Speaker 1: I will try to put a link in the notes

412
00:23:06,920 --> 00:23:11,400
Speaker 1: to this episode, but no promises. Um. But you know, um,

413
00:23:12,080 --> 00:23:15,119
Speaker 1: so talk to me about what made you stop doing drugs?

414
00:23:15,560 --> 00:23:17,399
Speaker 1: And I know now you're on the keto life, so

415
00:23:17,520 --> 00:23:21,159
Speaker 1: what made you invest in your health? It was just

416
00:23:21,280 --> 00:23:24,800
Speaker 1: like I was just like, fuck it, I'm where. I

417
00:23:24,920 --> 00:23:27,560
Speaker 1: hit the gym because I was like two hundred and

418
00:23:27,640 --> 00:23:29,920
Speaker 1: fifty pounds at one point I got real fat, and

419
00:23:30,000 --> 00:23:33,879
Speaker 1: I was just like, nah, I'm cool, you know what

420
00:23:33,920 --> 00:23:36,920
Speaker 1: I mean. I was just like literally, that's what it was.

421
00:23:37,000 --> 00:23:39,119
Speaker 1: I was just like, you know what, I'm cold. I

422
00:23:39,320 --> 00:23:41,080
Speaker 1: was went to put my socks on. I was like

423
00:23:41,840 --> 00:23:43,960
Speaker 1: I had to do all that. I was like, nah,

424
00:23:44,359 --> 00:23:47,240
Speaker 1: I was over, and it was just over, the same

425
00:23:47,320 --> 00:23:49,640
Speaker 1: thing with drugs. I was just like I was high

426
00:23:49,760 --> 00:23:53,560
Speaker 1: one time and I wasn't feeling it, Like I'm a

427
00:23:53,640 --> 00:23:56,880
Speaker 1: guy that I don't need rehabbing ship like for anything.

428
00:23:57,040 --> 00:23:59,840
Speaker 1: Like if I even we like I'm hiding ship right

429
00:23:59,880 --> 00:24:03,160
Speaker 1: now out too the reg reflect I'm like off edible

430
00:24:03,280 --> 00:24:07,800
Speaker 1: and but but like like if I want to quit anything,

431
00:24:07,920 --> 00:24:09,480
Speaker 1: i'd just be like, all right, it's over. I don't

432
00:24:09,480 --> 00:24:12,920
Speaker 1: want to do it. You know, I really like, you're

433
00:24:13,000 --> 00:24:16,800
Speaker 1: really really blessed. It just it just was real. Everything

434
00:24:16,920 --> 00:24:19,480
Speaker 1: was just hitting me like whoa, whoa, whoa whoa. And

435
00:24:19,520 --> 00:24:24,159
Speaker 1: I was just like I'm done. As I'm done. I

436
00:24:24,280 --> 00:24:28,360
Speaker 1: threw the pills in the in the toilet, and Ship

437
00:24:28,720 --> 00:24:31,879
Speaker 1: threw all the pills and the toilets. I was cleansed.

438
00:24:31,880 --> 00:24:33,720
Speaker 1: I felt like I was cleansed. I swear to God.

439
00:24:33,880 --> 00:24:35,960
Speaker 1: I was just like nope, I went straight to the gym.

440
00:24:36,800 --> 00:24:39,080
Speaker 1: It was over. And then I got a trainer and

441
00:24:39,119 --> 00:24:42,080
Speaker 1: ship and then he put me on the keyto ship

442
00:24:42,200 --> 00:24:46,359
Speaker 1: and yeah, I'm all about that keyto life. Yeah, and

443
00:24:46,440 --> 00:24:53,239
Speaker 1: then I started doing InterMute fasting. Yes, yeah, not right,

444
00:24:53,320 --> 00:24:55,320
Speaker 1: but right now I'm not on the key too at

445
00:24:55,359 --> 00:24:58,560
Speaker 1: this moment. That's what. Like how you were describing yourself

446
00:24:58,800 --> 00:25:01,520
Speaker 1: is exactly how I felt. After the baby. I was like, nah,

447
00:25:01,640 --> 00:25:04,520
Speaker 1: I'm cool. Nah, I'm not doing it like this, like

448
00:25:05,880 --> 00:25:09,960
Speaker 1: like you know, you've been inside my house, so it's

449
00:25:10,000 --> 00:25:13,119
Speaker 1: like a big staircase. So once I came down for

450
00:25:13,200 --> 00:25:14,840
Speaker 1: the day, I didn't have the energy to walk back

451
00:25:14,920 --> 00:25:17,520
Speaker 1: up ever. So I would pack myself like a little

452
00:25:17,680 --> 00:25:20,920
Speaker 1: bag for being downstairs for the day because I was like,

453
00:25:21,000 --> 00:25:23,280
Speaker 1: I can't I can't be huffing and puffing going up

454
00:25:23,320 --> 00:25:25,800
Speaker 1: and down all the time. And then once I was up,

455
00:25:25,880 --> 00:25:27,960
Speaker 1: I was up because it was just so much weight.

456
00:25:28,119 --> 00:25:31,359
Speaker 1: It was like I was breathing like like you know

457
00:25:31,440 --> 00:25:34,520
Speaker 1: how like like Precious was breathing on the staircase. That

458
00:25:34,680 --> 00:25:38,280
Speaker 1: was me um. But then kto happened, and thank god,

459
00:25:38,720 --> 00:25:43,080
Speaker 1: the baby weight, you know, just slowly starts to melt off.

460
00:25:43,240 --> 00:25:49,879
Speaker 1: But how old is your son? He he's he'll be

461
00:25:50,000 --> 00:25:52,879
Speaker 1: fifteen months in a few weeks. Yeah, you're at the

462
00:25:52,920 --> 00:26:00,119
Speaker 1: baby shower. He had my biggest. Oh, thank you is

463
00:26:00,200 --> 00:26:03,600
Speaker 1: what it is. He was bringing it. That is so

464
00:26:04,359 --> 00:26:07,960
Speaker 1: not politically correct up to be like, no that you

465
00:26:08,000 --> 00:26:11,520
Speaker 1: were straight? What it is? You as big as hell?

466
00:26:12,600 --> 00:26:16,280
Speaker 1: I mean it's gone. You shared it though it looked good. Yeah,

467
00:26:16,480 --> 00:26:18,800
Speaker 1: thank you? That was Yeah that was rough. Women have

468
00:26:18,920 --> 00:26:23,160
Speaker 1: it hard, man. Yeah, my girl going through it now. Yeah,

469
00:26:23,160 --> 00:26:25,560
Speaker 1: because you have a new baby. How old is the youngest? Now?

470
00:26:25,880 --> 00:26:29,520
Speaker 1: Six months? Oh my god. I want to come over

471
00:26:29,640 --> 00:26:33,160
Speaker 1: and hold that baby. I missed that age so much.

472
00:26:33,720 --> 00:26:39,439
Speaker 1: And they have that special smell. Yeah, I love that smell,

473
00:26:39,600 --> 00:26:42,520
Speaker 1: that little baby smell. It seems like it never go away. Right.

474
00:26:42,720 --> 00:26:45,000
Speaker 1: I would just bury my nose in like his neck,

475
00:26:45,200 --> 00:26:50,359
Speaker 1: Like that's what I'm doing with my baby girl every time.

476
00:26:51,040 --> 00:26:53,080
Speaker 1: That's like my little spot. I guess it right there,

477
00:26:53,119 --> 00:26:57,000
Speaker 1: and she started laughing. God, isn't it such like a

478
00:26:57,160 --> 00:27:02,440
Speaker 1: sacred responsibility? Yeah, it's big. But right now I don't

479
00:27:02,440 --> 00:27:05,280
Speaker 1: really do much, Like I never changed the diaper. What

480
00:27:06,359 --> 00:27:12,359
Speaker 1: how does that happen? I'm really like, Uh, it's gonna

481
00:27:12,359 --> 00:27:14,680
Speaker 1: sound weird. I'm like manly, manly when it comes to

482
00:27:14,840 --> 00:27:18,840
Speaker 1: like kids and stuff. What does that mean? Like? Um,

483
00:27:20,160 --> 00:27:23,680
Speaker 1: I'm not like the dad that like cleans up or

484
00:27:23,840 --> 00:27:26,840
Speaker 1: like change diapers and let me tell you right now,

485
00:27:26,920 --> 00:27:32,040
Speaker 1: that's the people get like the Claude kids ready for school. What. Yeah,

486
00:27:32,200 --> 00:27:33,879
Speaker 1: Like you know, I don't do that, but I do

487
00:27:34,080 --> 00:27:37,879
Speaker 1: like the other stuff, like the other part right now,

488
00:27:38,119 --> 00:27:42,520
Speaker 1: the fun stuff to mainly I mean, but like I mean,

489
00:27:42,920 --> 00:27:45,040
Speaker 1: my whole life is fun though, Like that's all I

490
00:27:45,160 --> 00:27:47,960
Speaker 1: make I try to do is fun, Like you know

491
00:27:47,960 --> 00:27:49,440
Speaker 1: what I mean. I took my That was another reason

492
00:27:49,440 --> 00:27:51,119
Speaker 1: I took my daughter out of school. I was like,

493
00:27:51,560 --> 00:27:53,920
Speaker 1: I want her to have more fun just sitting in

494
00:27:53,960 --> 00:27:57,560
Speaker 1: the home school right now. Yeahs like sitting in class

495
00:27:57,680 --> 00:28:00,320
Speaker 1: all day doing nothing where you can do all that

496
00:28:00,400 --> 00:28:03,719
Speaker 1: ship in two hours and go about your business, live

497
00:28:03,800 --> 00:28:05,800
Speaker 1: your day and going You guys have such a dope

498
00:28:05,840 --> 00:28:08,320
Speaker 1: relationship that I think that's one of the things too,

499
00:28:08,440 --> 00:28:10,640
Speaker 1: that I love so much about you. First of all,

500
00:28:10,760 --> 00:28:14,960
Speaker 1: your stories on Instagram are very compelling. They're so fun.

501
00:28:16,320 --> 00:28:20,960
Speaker 1: But like watching you and Joy like have these adventures

502
00:28:22,000 --> 00:28:24,680
Speaker 1: during the day and seeing how invested you are in

503
00:28:24,880 --> 00:28:29,200
Speaker 1: her soccer and her and in her achievements is really dope.

504
00:28:29,440 --> 00:28:32,040
Speaker 1: Do you feel like you are And I know You're

505
00:28:32,040 --> 00:28:35,119
Speaker 1: not doing this on purpose, but do you feel like

506
00:28:35,760 --> 00:28:40,880
Speaker 1: you're helping men that look like you understand fatherhood that

507
00:28:41,000 --> 00:28:43,920
Speaker 1: may not have had it. I know you're gonna say no,

508
00:28:44,240 --> 00:28:48,520
Speaker 1: because yeah, but I just feel like suponscious you really are,

509
00:28:49,640 --> 00:28:53,640
Speaker 1: because imagine all the men that don't know what fatherhood

510
00:28:53,640 --> 00:28:55,880
Speaker 1: looks like, and so they struggle with it because a

511
00:28:55,960 --> 00:28:59,040
Speaker 1: lot of people grow up without fathers, especially men of

512
00:28:59,160 --> 00:29:02,360
Speaker 1: color um in certain areas, like didn't grow up really

513
00:29:02,480 --> 00:29:05,240
Speaker 1: knowing what that meant. Like you understand, like, okay, I

514
00:29:05,440 --> 00:29:10,000
Speaker 1: feel the emotion of love, but what do I actually

515
00:29:10,320 --> 00:29:13,440
Speaker 1: do in this role? You know? And I think that

516
00:29:13,560 --> 00:29:17,600
Speaker 1: you kind of just by sharing your life are effortlessly

517
00:29:17,800 --> 00:29:21,840
Speaker 1: inspiring people, um and and just showing them like oh okay,

518
00:29:21,960 --> 00:29:26,840
Speaker 1: he his child is fed, Oh okay, he's supporting her dreams,

519
00:29:27,120 --> 00:29:29,840
Speaker 1: you know, or he's he's showing up and encouraging her,

520
00:29:30,000 --> 00:29:32,760
Speaker 1: helping her practice, or you know, taking her and her

521
00:29:32,800 --> 00:29:36,840
Speaker 1: friends out in the drop top and like you know, yeah,

522
00:29:36,880 --> 00:29:40,880
Speaker 1: I mean that's just yeah, I'll just be doing that,

523
00:29:41,120 --> 00:29:42,480
Speaker 1: you know what I mean? Every now and day. I

524
00:29:42,560 --> 00:29:45,400
Speaker 1: thought my phone out, you know, just to funk around,

525
00:29:45,760 --> 00:29:49,080
Speaker 1: But I always said I wasn't gonna put my new

526
00:29:49,160 --> 00:29:52,160
Speaker 1: baby too on the on the camera because I felt like,

527
00:29:52,520 --> 00:29:55,480
Speaker 1: only why I even still record joys because I felt

528
00:29:55,480 --> 00:29:59,120
Speaker 1: like I didn't gave people her life most since small

529
00:29:59,120 --> 00:30:02,320
Speaker 1: at the beginning of my career. She's been in all

530
00:30:02,480 --> 00:30:06,400
Speaker 1: my music videos since she was like a baby. Yeah

531
00:30:06,480 --> 00:30:08,160
Speaker 1: you know what I mean. So it's like people are

532
00:30:08,240 --> 00:30:11,120
Speaker 1: kind of invested in and it's like it is what

533
00:30:11,280 --> 00:30:14,240
Speaker 1: it is. She's already like you know, when we go places,

534
00:30:14,720 --> 00:30:16,800
Speaker 1: people say hi to me, they say hi to Georgia.

535
00:30:17,720 --> 00:30:20,680
Speaker 1: Is that weird for her? Not really, She's used to it.

536
00:30:20,800 --> 00:30:22,800
Speaker 1: She kind of used to it because it was always

537
00:30:22,920 --> 00:30:25,080
Speaker 1: like she with me, and it's like she was always

538
00:30:25,080 --> 00:30:29,800
Speaker 1: getting attention anyway, because it's like you know, schoolboy qute daughter, right,

539
00:30:30,320 --> 00:30:33,680
Speaker 1: you know, the school boy cute daughter or anything like

540
00:30:33,960 --> 00:30:36,880
Speaker 1: what up. So she's been meeting like famous people and

541
00:30:37,000 --> 00:30:40,680
Speaker 1: like yeah, well and taking her on the Grammy carpet

542
00:30:40,800 --> 00:30:45,040
Speaker 1: both y'all imagine. Tell me tell me behind that decision,

543
00:30:45,600 --> 00:30:47,440
Speaker 1: because for me, I was like looking at him being

544
00:30:47,480 --> 00:30:54,080
Speaker 1: a feminist. I love this. So my daughter wanted to

545
00:30:54,160 --> 00:30:56,840
Speaker 1: go to the Grammys. I don't go to really award shows.

546
00:30:57,400 --> 00:30:59,440
Speaker 1: I think I went to two awar shows literally that

547
00:30:59,560 --> 00:31:02,640
Speaker 1: Grammy and like guess two b T things so well

548
00:31:02,680 --> 00:31:06,040
Speaker 1: we were it was a radio room for me. Okay, yeah,

549
00:31:06,760 --> 00:31:11,040
Speaker 1: but I did one BT Award. But yeah, I've been

550
00:31:11,080 --> 00:31:13,120
Speaker 1: like I said, I've been nominated mad times for the

551
00:31:13,200 --> 00:31:15,280
Speaker 1: Grammys and all that ship and I never go. This

552
00:31:15,440 --> 00:31:20,840
Speaker 1: is like one time Joey was like, UM, like, let's go,

553
00:31:21,040 --> 00:31:23,320
Speaker 1: let's go to the Grammys. I want to go. I

554
00:31:23,400 --> 00:31:26,360
Speaker 1: was just like, let's go. And I was like, I'm

555
00:31:26,360 --> 00:31:28,040
Speaker 1: gonna gim and get you right too. I was like,

556
00:31:28,480 --> 00:31:32,000
Speaker 1: I told the cuddle, let's just wear pink and then

557
00:31:32,080 --> 00:31:34,680
Speaker 1: I got her like the outfit or whatever, and I

558
00:31:34,800 --> 00:31:36,640
Speaker 1: was and I was just like, i'mna just wear a

559
00:31:36,680 --> 00:31:39,200
Speaker 1: hoodie and ship. You know what I'm saying. And I

560
00:31:39,320 --> 00:31:42,120
Speaker 1: was just like me personally, I'm just thinking like um

561
00:31:42,200 --> 00:31:47,239
Speaker 1: as a man um and looking at sports and how

562
00:31:47,480 --> 00:31:50,120
Speaker 1: investor she is and like how much she cared and

563
00:31:50,200 --> 00:31:54,080
Speaker 1: how good a lot of these little girls are in sports.

564
00:31:54,200 --> 00:31:59,520
Speaker 1: They deserved like attention to that makes sense. So like

565
00:31:59,760 --> 00:32:02,720
Speaker 1: I um not even with my Instagram, like I kind

566
00:32:02,760 --> 00:32:06,520
Speaker 1: of like follow like mad female like athletes to like

567
00:32:07,040 --> 00:32:10,480
Speaker 1: just liking posts or do any anything I can do

568
00:32:10,640 --> 00:32:12,960
Speaker 1: to help or like, you know, any any little thing

569
00:32:13,200 --> 00:32:15,040
Speaker 1: like you know what I'm saying like this big enough

570
00:32:15,120 --> 00:32:20,480
Speaker 1: women more because I have two girls, and you want,

571
00:32:20,560 --> 00:32:22,960
Speaker 1: okay to say you're a feminist. You are a feminist.

572
00:32:23,960 --> 00:32:28,760
Speaker 1: You're a feminist. I don't even know what exactly, so

573
00:32:28,920 --> 00:32:31,320
Speaker 1: don't say that you're not. So how can I be

574
00:32:31,480 --> 00:32:33,240
Speaker 1: something that I don't even know what it is? Well,

575
00:32:33,520 --> 00:32:37,960
Speaker 1: I being a feminist at at like the root of it, right, Like,

576
00:32:38,160 --> 00:32:42,240
Speaker 1: not not all the propaganda around the word over the

577
00:32:42,720 --> 00:32:45,640
Speaker 1: last several decades, but the roote of being a feminist

578
00:32:45,800 --> 00:32:49,200
Speaker 1: just means that you believe that inherently men and women

579
00:32:49,440 --> 00:32:53,000
Speaker 1: are equals, and that men aren't better than, or higher than,

580
00:32:53,400 --> 00:32:58,200
Speaker 1: or deserving of more privileged than a woman because he

581
00:32:58,320 --> 00:33:03,040
Speaker 1: was born with the penis. Yeah, I mean I thought,

582
00:33:03,120 --> 00:33:06,240
Speaker 1: I think that's how most people feel. It's just no,

583
00:33:06,720 --> 00:33:09,760
Speaker 1: you'd be surprised. Oh it's the old people. Man, Like

584
00:33:09,880 --> 00:33:12,920
Speaker 1: I don't know people that think like that, Like you shouldn't.

585
00:33:13,840 --> 00:33:17,200
Speaker 1: I don't even know people like you love women and

586
00:33:17,320 --> 00:33:20,840
Speaker 1: you are a feminist and just accepted and standing that

587
00:33:23,160 --> 00:33:27,400
Speaker 1: you're a great father to two girls. Like just saying that,

588
00:33:28,320 --> 00:33:31,960
Speaker 1: I'm just saying, man, women, But man, I'm just saying

589
00:33:32,000 --> 00:33:33,920
Speaker 1: I don't know what the hell that is, Like I

590
00:33:34,080 --> 00:33:37,880
Speaker 1: still I thought everybody was thought everybody should be equal.

591
00:33:38,200 --> 00:33:42,479
Speaker 1: When do you feel like you're awakening, like really geared up,

592
00:33:43,320 --> 00:33:49,960
Speaker 1: like awake. I was saying, like maybe a year and

593
00:33:50,040 --> 00:33:53,080
Speaker 1: a half, two years ago, like where I just fully became.

594
00:33:54,040 --> 00:33:56,080
Speaker 1: Even when I was like in the Hawaiian ship, I

595
00:33:56,120 --> 00:33:58,640
Speaker 1: was still in a weird spot. Yeah, it was like

596
00:33:58,760 --> 00:34:01,080
Speaker 1: I was going like this, like I would I would happen.

597
00:34:01,520 --> 00:34:04,000
Speaker 1: I was trying to break through, you know what I mean.

598
00:34:04,040 --> 00:34:06,840
Speaker 1: I was trying to break through, and um, I think

599
00:34:06,880 --> 00:34:11,000
Speaker 1: I fully broke through. And that's when I started notice

600
00:34:11,080 --> 00:34:16,000
Speaker 1: to change it myself. But um, a fully excuse I

601
00:34:16,120 --> 00:34:18,319
Speaker 1: fully broke through. Like a year and a half two

602
00:34:18,480 --> 00:34:23,920
Speaker 1: years ago, I started, uh like meditating to that ship like,

603
00:34:24,200 --> 00:34:28,719
Speaker 1: um pretty much every day. Um I love that, Like,

604
00:34:28,880 --> 00:34:31,759
Speaker 1: tell me more about that. What's your spiritual practice? Do

605
00:34:31,840 --> 00:34:33,319
Speaker 1: you do it in the morning when you wake up

606
00:34:33,560 --> 00:34:36,399
Speaker 1: every every morning? When I wake up every morning, that's

607
00:34:36,480 --> 00:34:38,360
Speaker 1: like the first thing I do. I don't even brush

608
00:34:38,400 --> 00:34:42,160
Speaker 1: my teeth. I do it. It's like a wake up thing.

609
00:34:42,239 --> 00:34:44,799
Speaker 1: It's like you know where you wake up and most

610
00:34:44,880 --> 00:34:48,680
Speaker 1: people they just sitting there bed for a while. Scroll Yeah,

611
00:34:48,800 --> 00:34:51,120
Speaker 1: they just do like I just once I get up,

612
00:34:51,160 --> 00:34:53,680
Speaker 1: I just get straight to it, because it's like it's

613
00:34:53,719 --> 00:34:56,560
Speaker 1: fighting through your laziness. Because I think that's the problem

614
00:34:56,680 --> 00:34:59,719
Speaker 1: that we all have a humans. We start our day

615
00:34:59,760 --> 00:35:03,160
Speaker 1: off lazy, and it makes us lazy for our whole life.

616
00:35:03,239 --> 00:35:05,799
Speaker 1: We've been training ourselves to be lazy our whole life.

617
00:35:05,840 --> 00:35:09,640
Speaker 1: We wake up your life. You didn't rest my name,

618
00:35:09,800 --> 00:35:12,279
Speaker 1: like you can get it together as you walk into

619
00:35:12,360 --> 00:35:15,080
Speaker 1: the thing. They're thinking of your tasks. Don't get me wrong.

620
00:35:15,160 --> 00:35:18,800
Speaker 1: Sometimes you are exhausted. Yeah, but I'm saying yeah, but

621
00:35:18,880 --> 00:35:21,560
Speaker 1: there's a different the normal bounce up just like go

622
00:35:21,760 --> 00:35:25,560
Speaker 1: do it. I just bounce up. Um, I'm not gonna

623
00:35:25,560 --> 00:35:27,279
Speaker 1: do it. I don't even I don't do nothing though.

624
00:35:27,280 --> 00:35:29,400
Speaker 1: I don't use the bathroom. I don't brush my teeth

625
00:35:29,440 --> 00:35:32,440
Speaker 1: on you. No, not just go straight to it. That

626
00:35:33,880 --> 00:35:35,800
Speaker 1: I don't know. It's just I don't know, man. I

627
00:35:36,840 --> 00:35:40,520
Speaker 1: do a lot of things better, like um, I don't know,

628
00:35:40,600 --> 00:35:43,640
Speaker 1: like even like with food ever since I started intermitted

629
00:35:43,680 --> 00:35:45,440
Speaker 1: fast and it's like I don't even eat for like

630
00:35:46,320 --> 00:35:49,680
Speaker 1: for taste anymore, just because I'm hungry. I really don't

631
00:35:49,719 --> 00:35:51,719
Speaker 1: care for food no more like that. Oh my god,

632
00:35:51,960 --> 00:35:54,880
Speaker 1: it's so crazy like that. So that's exactly how I

633
00:35:54,920 --> 00:35:57,600
Speaker 1: feel about it, because I started doing Intermitte fasting Wi Keto,

634
00:35:57,800 --> 00:36:01,839
Speaker 1: and I felt like it's a such a no pun

635
00:36:01,920 --> 00:36:04,520
Speaker 1: intendant but like weight off my shoulders because like a

636
00:36:04,600 --> 00:36:06,800
Speaker 1: lot of my issues with food were based around the

637
00:36:06,840 --> 00:36:10,680
Speaker 1: fact that I like delicious things, and I like, you know,

638
00:36:10,840 --> 00:36:13,680
Speaker 1: I like the process of planning the meal or thinking

639
00:36:13,719 --> 00:36:15,520
Speaker 1: about what I'm gonna eat. I could be thinking about

640
00:36:15,520 --> 00:36:17,440
Speaker 1: that for hours before I actually eat it, like, oh,

641
00:36:17,440 --> 00:36:20,640
Speaker 1: I'm gonna go have the sushi later or whatever, like

642
00:36:20,719 --> 00:36:23,160
Speaker 1: my favorite thing is. And then you eat and you

643
00:36:23,320 --> 00:36:25,640
Speaker 1: chew and you smell and you know, it becomes this

644
00:36:25,719 --> 00:36:29,640
Speaker 1: whole thing that isn't actually about like nourishment for your body, um,

645
00:36:29,920 --> 00:36:32,160
Speaker 1: and so then you know, it feels good, it tastes good.

646
00:36:32,239 --> 00:36:33,960
Speaker 1: You do what every chance that you get, and then

647
00:36:34,040 --> 00:36:37,840
Speaker 1: it's like a million calories later. But through Internet avascinating

648
00:36:37,840 --> 00:36:42,760
Speaker 1: through Keto is completely restructured, like my relationship with food

649
00:36:43,000 --> 00:36:45,360
Speaker 1: and just my ability to to like tap into how

650
00:36:45,440 --> 00:36:47,920
Speaker 1: my body feels. Like I feel way more connected to

651
00:36:48,000 --> 00:36:52,160
Speaker 1: my body. I have a way more energy to Yeah,

652
00:36:52,560 --> 00:36:55,640
Speaker 1: like I can do things so much better on an

653
00:36:55,680 --> 00:37:00,400
Speaker 1: empty stomach than being full, Like oh my god, waking

654
00:37:00,480 --> 00:37:02,319
Speaker 1: up in the morning and like going to the gym

655
00:37:02,400 --> 00:37:06,800
Speaker 1: on an empty stomach is like the best, the most energy.

656
00:37:06,920 --> 00:37:09,080
Speaker 1: Like people don't understand it. They like how you do

657
00:37:09,239 --> 00:37:11,399
Speaker 1: that at all? Bro, I gotta eat. I'm like, dude,

658
00:37:11,480 --> 00:37:14,320
Speaker 1: you have you have no idea, Like I mean, but

659
00:37:14,520 --> 00:37:17,360
Speaker 1: you know, teach his own. But I mean, at the

660
00:37:17,440 --> 00:37:20,680
Speaker 1: same time, it's just like, bro, don't knock it, like

661
00:37:21,239 --> 00:37:23,680
Speaker 1: you ain't even trying. You ain't never tried it. You know,

662
00:37:23,920 --> 00:37:25,920
Speaker 1: people be having hell of opinions on it based off

663
00:37:26,000 --> 00:37:28,960
Speaker 1: Instagram because like he don't want Instagram makes people think

664
00:37:29,040 --> 00:37:31,360
Speaker 1: you're eating bacon and butter all day, you know what

665
00:37:31,440 --> 00:37:33,600
Speaker 1: I mean. And I'm like, no, read a book, like

666
00:37:33,719 --> 00:37:36,160
Speaker 1: that's not what it is at all. Also, you did

667
00:37:36,200 --> 00:37:38,240
Speaker 1: not worry about my health when I was eating crazy

668
00:37:38,320 --> 00:37:41,520
Speaker 1: all day. But because I say I'm doing this, it's like, oh, well,

669
00:37:41,560 --> 00:37:44,239
Speaker 1: where do you get your your vitamins? And it's like

670
00:37:45,000 --> 00:37:52,640
Speaker 1: shut up, no, but yeah, it's it's dope. I wanna again.

671
00:37:52,719 --> 00:37:55,000
Speaker 1: As you know, I'm very fascinated by you and your story.

672
00:37:55,239 --> 00:37:56,960
Speaker 1: I think that we have we have a lot of

673
00:37:57,040 --> 00:38:01,320
Speaker 1: similarities to that I didn't realize, like when I first

674
00:38:02,040 --> 00:38:05,560
Speaker 1: I knew you, Like we're both only children raised by

675
00:38:05,640 --> 00:38:09,120
Speaker 1: single mothers. For periods of time, we were latchkey kids,

676
00:38:09,200 --> 00:38:12,040
Speaker 1: like getting ourselves ready or taking care of ourselves alone.

677
00:38:12,960 --> 00:38:18,040
Speaker 1: Um and there for me, like that that's really where

678
00:38:18,160 --> 00:38:20,799
Speaker 1: a lot of my awakening comes from. Like even though

679
00:38:20,920 --> 00:38:23,840
Speaker 1: I wasn't always the most spiritually in tune or always

680
00:38:23,880 --> 00:38:26,400
Speaker 1: making the best decisions, I feel like by nature of

681
00:38:26,480 --> 00:38:30,640
Speaker 1: being an only child, in that type of predicament, you

682
00:38:30,760 --> 00:38:33,359
Speaker 1: become really self aware because you're inside your own head

683
00:38:33,440 --> 00:38:36,120
Speaker 1: so much Like did you have that experience where you

684
00:38:36,200 --> 00:38:39,960
Speaker 1: feel like you are in your own mind a lot

685
00:38:40,040 --> 00:38:47,280
Speaker 1: of the time? Or yeah, only child? Fuck mine is crazy.

686
00:38:47,360 --> 00:38:51,120
Speaker 1: You always got some idea you always what? Yeah, Like

687
00:38:51,239 --> 00:38:57,080
Speaker 1: you're always dissecting things like experiences only child as a

688
00:38:57,160 --> 00:39:00,359
Speaker 1: gift and a curse. Man, It's like because you most

689
00:39:00,400 --> 00:39:03,440
Speaker 1: a lot of only childs are like really really really creative.

690
00:39:04,200 --> 00:39:06,600
Speaker 1: Yeah you know what I mean, they are really independent.

691
00:39:07,440 --> 00:39:09,800
Speaker 1: I love being alone, like I love being alone, like

692
00:39:10,320 --> 00:39:13,200
Speaker 1: I only go to the movies by myself. I never

693
00:39:13,320 --> 00:39:15,120
Speaker 1: go to the movies with like my girl, I'm like

694
00:39:15,320 --> 00:39:18,560
Speaker 1: my kid and ship. I only go by myself every

695
00:39:18,640 --> 00:39:21,480
Speaker 1: now and then like you know, like Aladdin or Frozen.

696
00:39:22,640 --> 00:39:25,759
Speaker 1: I Frozen was crazy. Frozen was the last straw for me.

697
00:39:26,200 --> 00:39:28,839
Speaker 1: What I was like, I'm done with this little kid

698
00:39:29,080 --> 00:39:32,960
Speaker 1: movie ship. Like I'm like, I'm cool. I'm never coming

699
00:39:33,040 --> 00:39:35,400
Speaker 1: to none of this little kids ship. We're gonna do

700
00:39:35,560 --> 00:39:38,560
Speaker 1: the daddy ship, like we're gonna go watch it or

701
00:39:38,680 --> 00:39:43,480
Speaker 1: some ship that's doing then we're gonna we're gonna do it.

702
00:39:43,800 --> 00:39:46,040
Speaker 1: We're gonna do like you know what I'm saying, some

703
00:39:46,200 --> 00:39:49,200
Speaker 1: other old adult movie you want to see or some ship,

704
00:39:49,280 --> 00:39:51,560
Speaker 1: we're gonna do that. I'm gonna take you to do

705
00:39:51,640 --> 00:39:54,160
Speaker 1: it with myma ain't going probably say no. I'm gonna

706
00:39:54,200 --> 00:39:57,040
Speaker 1: be like, let's do it. No, but like like legitimately,

707
00:39:57,160 --> 00:40:00,640
Speaker 1: like as the only child, like I like taking myself

708
00:40:00,719 --> 00:40:06,440
Speaker 1: to lunch alone. I like like I've really if you're

709
00:40:06,480 --> 00:40:07,759
Speaker 1: not the only child, you may not be able to

710
00:40:07,800 --> 00:40:10,399
Speaker 1: get this. So it may sound crazy, but I feel

711
00:40:10,440 --> 00:40:12,719
Speaker 1: like I am my like and I'm blessed with many

712
00:40:12,920 --> 00:40:16,520
Speaker 1: incredible friends, but I feel like I'm my best friend.

713
00:40:16,600 --> 00:40:20,200
Speaker 1: Like I really like myself and like spending time with myself.

714
00:40:20,440 --> 00:40:22,920
Speaker 1: You know, I think I'm funny. I think I'm brilliant.

715
00:40:23,000 --> 00:40:27,759
Speaker 1: Like I think I'm dope. I get real. Do you

716
00:40:27,840 --> 00:40:30,399
Speaker 1: get irritated with people too? Like do you like need

717
00:40:30,520 --> 00:40:33,120
Speaker 1: space from people sometimes? Too? I do? And you know,

718
00:40:33,200 --> 00:40:35,239
Speaker 1: it's so funny because I'm also a Gemini and people

719
00:40:35,239 --> 00:40:38,360
Speaker 1: would always be like, oh, Gemini always mood swings, and

720
00:40:38,440 --> 00:40:40,520
Speaker 1: I was like no, and I started looking at it,

721
00:40:40,520 --> 00:40:43,440
Speaker 1: and it's not necessarily mood swings. But I do crave

722
00:40:43,600 --> 00:40:45,880
Speaker 1: my own space, Like I don't like being around a

723
00:40:46,000 --> 00:40:48,239
Speaker 1: lot of noise all the time or a lot of

724
00:40:48,320 --> 00:40:50,320
Speaker 1: people doing a lot of things all the time. Like

725
00:40:50,480 --> 00:40:54,800
Speaker 1: I really like a little bit of isolation sprinkled in

726
00:40:54,920 --> 00:40:59,920
Speaker 1: my life. It's I always have that thing, like I'll

727
00:41:00,080 --> 00:41:03,360
Speaker 1: be around a bunch of people, like even like doing music,

728
00:41:03,560 --> 00:41:06,399
Speaker 1: and I can't be with a producer really for too

729
00:41:06,520 --> 00:41:08,840
Speaker 1: long because it's like, all right, I need something, do

730
00:41:09,040 --> 00:41:11,880
Speaker 1: something else, you know. Like I even go to the

731
00:41:12,000 --> 00:41:15,680
Speaker 1: studio and record by myself, like just me and the engineer,

732
00:41:16,040 --> 00:41:21,359
Speaker 1: Like most of my music is done like by myself. Yeah,

733
00:41:21,440 --> 00:41:23,520
Speaker 1: Like I may have a bunch of people in the

734
00:41:23,600 --> 00:41:25,800
Speaker 1: studio at times, and I may write the song and

735
00:41:25,920 --> 00:41:28,879
Speaker 1: I just just won't even record it just because it's

736
00:41:29,480 --> 00:41:33,640
Speaker 1: people in there and ship and like I come back

737
00:41:33,680 --> 00:41:36,719
Speaker 1: the next day or something like early, because like, um,

738
00:41:37,000 --> 00:41:42,320
Speaker 1: sometimes I do like sessions like like eight am, you know,

739
00:41:42,440 --> 00:41:45,600
Speaker 1: and I normally like when I'm just recording that fresh voice,

740
00:41:45,719 --> 00:41:49,120
Speaker 1: that fresh like off the wake up. I love so

741
00:41:49,239 --> 00:41:51,840
Speaker 1: love writing music around that time. To fresh off to

742
00:41:51,920 --> 00:41:54,480
Speaker 1: wake up. Your mind is just fresh. Nothing ame been,

743
00:41:54,840 --> 00:41:57,520
Speaker 1: It hasn't been messed with, no toxic, no nothing, no

744
00:41:57,840 --> 00:42:00,959
Speaker 1: no anything that goes So again, like what most people

745
00:42:01,120 --> 00:42:03,960
Speaker 1: stereotype of like an artist or a rapper is it's like, no,

746
00:42:04,120 --> 00:42:06,200
Speaker 1: I don't get to the studio to eleven PM and

747
00:42:06,239 --> 00:42:08,560
Speaker 1: then we don't start till two am, and then I

748
00:42:08,680 --> 00:42:13,400
Speaker 1: sleep my whole day away. Yeah that's um, but it's

749
00:42:13,440 --> 00:42:19,160
Speaker 1: weird because three am is the magic hour. Yeah, that's

750
00:42:19,280 --> 00:42:23,239
Speaker 1: that's the magic hour. Though. Like it's something about like

751
00:42:23,480 --> 00:42:28,480
Speaker 1: being a half tired the creativity and being half tired

752
00:42:29,800 --> 00:42:34,320
Speaker 1: so so crazy, Like I wrote some of my craziest

753
00:42:34,360 --> 00:42:38,640
Speaker 1: songs around three four in the morning, being in the

754
00:42:38,800 --> 00:42:43,399
Speaker 1: studio all day and then just like um, finally coming

755
00:42:43,480 --> 00:42:46,560
Speaker 1: up with it, like when you're thinking like fucking I'm

756
00:42:46,560 --> 00:42:48,560
Speaker 1: gonna just get out of here, then it's just like

757
00:42:49,080 --> 00:42:53,560
Speaker 1: catch it. You just like like the craziest ship, Like, um,

758
00:42:54,080 --> 00:42:58,440
Speaker 1: all my most of my like storytelling, like I did Tales,

759
00:42:58,600 --> 00:43:04,600
Speaker 1: Late Night, Crash Talk, I've done oh studio, studio. I

760
00:43:04,680 --> 00:43:10,520
Speaker 1: did studio like Super Smash in the Morning, um Kyla

761
00:43:10,600 --> 00:43:12,360
Speaker 1: Greens and Man of the Year. It was like I

762
00:43:12,440 --> 00:43:15,239
Speaker 1: did those in the same night. Oh so yeah three

763
00:43:15,280 --> 00:43:17,600
Speaker 1: in the morning really is your time? Yea, Like literally

764
00:43:17,680 --> 00:43:20,160
Speaker 1: the same night because they were pressing me about the

765
00:43:20,280 --> 00:43:22,759
Speaker 1: album like oh we we we need some singles, this

766
00:43:22,840 --> 00:43:26,000
Speaker 1: your first album, blah blah blah this that we need

767
00:43:26,080 --> 00:43:28,440
Speaker 1: some singles. And I was in the studio all day

768
00:43:28,560 --> 00:43:31,319
Speaker 1: just trying to four ship. Then like three or four

769
00:43:31,360 --> 00:43:33,719
Speaker 1: o'clock came and I just knocked them ships out like

770
00:43:34,920 --> 00:43:37,279
Speaker 1: I was like here, then my album was done. I

771
00:43:37,360 --> 00:43:40,399
Speaker 1: remember that like that's one of my like, uh, it's

772
00:43:40,440 --> 00:43:42,840
Speaker 1: like one of my championship moments of my career that

773
00:43:42,920 --> 00:43:47,080
Speaker 1: I always remember. It's like they was pressing me, pressing

774
00:43:47,160 --> 00:43:50,680
Speaker 1: me and then talking about pushing the album back and

775
00:43:50,760 --> 00:43:52,400
Speaker 1: all this ship because I was a new artist, so

776
00:43:52,520 --> 00:43:54,440
Speaker 1: they didn't want to just throw me out there, you know.

777
00:43:55,560 --> 00:43:57,879
Speaker 1: And then I did those ships the same night under

778
00:43:57,920 --> 00:44:01,560
Speaker 1: the pressure, right right when I thought it was over,

779
00:44:01,719 --> 00:44:03,880
Speaker 1: Like fuck, I can't do it. I can't come up

780
00:44:03,920 --> 00:44:07,000
Speaker 1: with this ship. Keep in mind, already had studio. The

781
00:44:07,080 --> 00:44:09,920
Speaker 1: studio was a interlude, it was already on the album,

782
00:44:10,280 --> 00:44:12,880
Speaker 1: and that would end up being the number one record.

783
00:44:13,600 --> 00:44:16,759
Speaker 1: But still it was just like, bro, I did that

784
00:44:16,840 --> 00:44:21,360
Speaker 1: ship that fast that night, under that pressure and handed

785
00:44:21,480 --> 00:44:25,920
Speaker 1: in and made the deadline and all of them are

786
00:44:26,360 --> 00:44:30,080
Speaker 1: double platinum kyl of Green's double platinum in your double

787
00:44:30,120 --> 00:44:35,040
Speaker 1: platinum studios like triple or four times platinum, and it

788
00:44:35,160 --> 00:44:39,839
Speaker 1: went number one. But yeah, just like it's just crazy though,

789
00:44:39,960 --> 00:44:43,400
Speaker 1: like all three o'clock, four o'clock, can we talk about

790
00:44:43,440 --> 00:44:46,440
Speaker 1: my favorite song? Which you know which one? And you're

791
00:44:46,440 --> 00:44:50,280
Speaker 1: gonna get mad? No, no, that well, that is absolutely

792
00:44:50,400 --> 00:44:58,120
Speaker 1: my favorite song on Crashtalk. But in your discography, oh

793
00:44:58,480 --> 00:45:04,320
Speaker 1: my god, that is so like the first time you

794
00:45:04,400 --> 00:45:07,200
Speaker 1: told me you hated that song. It hurt me and

795
00:45:07,280 --> 00:45:11,560
Speaker 1: my soul. Um not that good. It is good, and

796
00:45:11,640 --> 00:45:14,480
Speaker 1: I understand like your your critique of it is sonically

797
00:45:14,600 --> 00:45:19,680
Speaker 1: you feel like now you record better, But the feel

798
00:45:19,760 --> 00:45:23,200
Speaker 1: of it, like the message of it, the lyrics of it,

799
00:45:23,320 --> 00:45:25,279
Speaker 1: like so I have I have a playlist that I

800
00:45:25,360 --> 00:45:28,319
Speaker 1: made right and I call it um. I just call

801
00:45:28,360 --> 00:45:32,600
Speaker 1: it like my my favorite things playlist, um and whenever

802
00:45:32,719 --> 00:45:36,280
Speaker 1: I feel like whenever I'm going through challenges or experiencing depression,

803
00:45:36,719 --> 00:45:38,680
Speaker 1: Like that's a playlist I play all the time. The

804
00:45:38,719 --> 00:45:41,960
Speaker 1: playlist has I think nineteen days worth of music on it, right,

805
00:45:42,440 --> 00:45:45,680
Speaker 1: But like the requirement for it for me was the

806
00:45:45,800 --> 00:45:47,840
Speaker 1: only songs that can make it on. There are songs

807
00:45:47,880 --> 00:45:51,040
Speaker 1: that spark joy, like songs that make me smile or

808
00:45:51,160 --> 00:45:54,320
Speaker 1: make me feel good, right, and so like two of

809
00:45:54,360 --> 00:45:56,840
Speaker 1: the songs that have been that song has been my

810
00:45:56,920 --> 00:45:59,080
Speaker 1: goal to since it came out, Like I used to

811
00:45:59,200 --> 00:46:03,719
Speaker 1: start every single day with that song. But that song,

812
00:46:04,680 --> 00:46:08,480
Speaker 1: that song and now god by Dot like both of

813
00:46:08,560 --> 00:46:11,760
Speaker 1: those records to me, like just speak to my soul

814
00:46:11,920 --> 00:46:16,520
Speaker 1: and and also randomly, um a record by John A.

815
00:46:16,680 --> 00:46:20,239
Speaker 1: Do you remember them now? I'll play it for you later.

816
00:46:20,880 --> 00:46:23,560
Speaker 1: It's some R and B from the nineties. But like

817
00:46:23,680 --> 00:46:29,200
Speaker 1: those songs both like just connect me to like sacred Energy,

818
00:46:29,520 --> 00:46:39,440
Speaker 1: you know, ye man, I hate that song embarrassing, embarrassing

819
00:46:40,320 --> 00:46:43,640
Speaker 1: You're talking about being blessed and someone keeping their head up,

820
00:46:43,840 --> 00:46:46,239
Speaker 1: Like like to me, that's like pop keep your head

821
00:46:46,320 --> 00:46:47,880
Speaker 1: up when I hear that song. And that's on my

822
00:46:47,920 --> 00:46:52,719
Speaker 1: playlist to executed. Oh my god, you're a very harsh

823
00:46:52,760 --> 00:46:56,600
Speaker 1: critic of yourself. I've come to find man because I

824
00:46:56,680 --> 00:46:59,040
Speaker 1: wasn't even watching. I watched the interview did with Charlotte

825
00:46:59,040 --> 00:47:02,480
Speaker 1: manin Um, and you were like you were being so

826
00:47:02,719 --> 00:47:05,080
Speaker 1: critical of yourself, and it was so surprising to me

827
00:47:05,400 --> 00:47:08,640
Speaker 1: in that interview, like do you do you think that

828
00:47:08,719 --> 00:47:12,800
Speaker 1: you're somebody that can take time to like celebrate you

829
00:47:13,000 --> 00:47:16,640
Speaker 1: or appreciate it for what? What do you mean? I mean? People?

830
00:47:16,800 --> 00:47:20,520
Speaker 1: I mean, I know, I mean, I know, I'm I

831
00:47:20,719 --> 00:47:25,920
Speaker 1: breathe confidence, I believe, I scream confidences. Um, I just like, um,

832
00:47:27,040 --> 00:47:30,439
Speaker 1: I don't know. I just feel like where most people

833
00:47:30,560 --> 00:47:34,279
Speaker 1: just be quiet about things I said. So it may

834
00:47:34,360 --> 00:47:38,520
Speaker 1: seem like I'm more like you know, sometimes you do

835
00:47:38,680 --> 00:47:41,640
Speaker 1: songs and you like, damn that ship is not that tight.

836
00:47:42,520 --> 00:47:44,719
Speaker 1: It is what It's like, It's cool, I'm doing another one.

837
00:47:44,719 --> 00:47:46,960
Speaker 1: I ain't driven, like you know what I'm saying, Like

838
00:47:47,080 --> 00:47:51,440
Speaker 1: it's like I don't know, so like I don't know.

839
00:47:51,520 --> 00:47:53,600
Speaker 1: I just I don't know. I was really bad at

840
00:47:53,680 --> 00:47:56,680
Speaker 1: lying too, so I used to get in trouble a

841
00:47:56,800 --> 00:47:58,719
Speaker 1: lot for lying. So I was I was I was

842
00:47:58,840 --> 00:48:01,239
Speaker 1: just always like because I used to try to lie

843
00:48:01,320 --> 00:48:03,279
Speaker 1: a lot. You want to come and I was a

844
00:48:03,360 --> 00:48:07,160
Speaker 1: big lie. Um, but I was terrible that I would

845
00:48:07,200 --> 00:48:09,640
Speaker 1: get or my mom would just let it slide. And

846
00:48:10,080 --> 00:48:12,239
Speaker 1: but I can tell you know I'm lying, and then

847
00:48:12,320 --> 00:48:16,359
Speaker 1: it's really hard for me. It was just over. Yeah,

848
00:48:16,719 --> 00:48:19,239
Speaker 1: it's too much stress to me to lie, Like I

849
00:48:19,239 --> 00:48:23,200
Speaker 1: would just rather say whatever the truth is and catch

850
00:48:23,320 --> 00:48:29,279
Speaker 1: my faith like whatever life throws at me when it

851
00:48:29,360 --> 00:48:33,800
Speaker 1: comes to like a stranger, I have I mean, I

852
00:48:33,920 --> 00:48:36,319
Speaker 1: have lied plenty of plenty of times. I'm a strong

853
00:48:36,400 --> 00:48:42,759
Speaker 1: believer in protecting uh my my my or and my energy. Like, um,

854
00:48:44,000 --> 00:48:46,880
Speaker 1: if I have to uh send you on a different

855
00:48:47,360 --> 00:48:50,000
Speaker 1: path to get you off my road, I'm just going.

856
00:48:52,760 --> 00:48:54,440
Speaker 1: You know, I'm not gonna lie to you on some

857
00:48:54,640 --> 00:48:56,920
Speaker 1: some silly as ship like oh yeah, I meet you

858
00:48:57,000 --> 00:49:00,400
Speaker 1: tomorrow and then never show up. You know it like that,

859
00:49:00,600 --> 00:49:04,160
Speaker 1: but like just a little patty bullshit, little just to

860
00:49:04,280 --> 00:49:06,520
Speaker 1: get you to funk away from somebody toxic because you

861
00:49:06,560 --> 00:49:08,880
Speaker 1: know he's Sometimes the truth can get you hurt too.

862
00:49:09,600 --> 00:49:12,600
Speaker 1: Sometimes the truth could cause a big, big problem when

863
00:49:12,640 --> 00:49:15,600
Speaker 1: you could just diffuse it and just walk away from

864
00:49:16,800 --> 00:49:21,120
Speaker 1: on on great terms. So line is never not. Is

865
00:49:21,200 --> 00:49:24,160
Speaker 1: that something really important to you, like keeping um, just

866
00:49:24,320 --> 00:49:28,000
Speaker 1: keeping your space really clear. Yeah, yeah, because you you.

867
00:49:28,480 --> 00:49:30,560
Speaker 1: I don't want to run into no problems, man Like

868
00:49:32,120 --> 00:49:36,600
Speaker 1: I live my life too well of like just chilling

869
00:49:36,719 --> 00:49:39,399
Speaker 1: and just living a good life. And I don't want

870
00:49:39,400 --> 00:49:41,960
Speaker 1: to funk it up by like fucking with some That's

871
00:49:41,960 --> 00:49:43,759
Speaker 1: the only way you suck it up. People get into

872
00:49:43,800 --> 00:49:47,439
Speaker 1: your head and do ship like I changed something about

873
00:49:47,520 --> 00:49:49,920
Speaker 1: me when I'm ready to change something about me, you

874
00:49:50,000 --> 00:49:53,560
Speaker 1: know what I'm saying. Like even with depressed people like um,

875
00:49:54,400 --> 00:49:58,319
Speaker 1: in suicide, it's somebody else's it's not necessarily always them.

876
00:49:58,440 --> 00:50:01,480
Speaker 1: Is somebody else too, that's rather to be social media.

877
00:50:01,560 --> 00:50:04,719
Speaker 1: They're constantly looking at or you know, whatever it is.

878
00:50:04,840 --> 00:50:07,520
Speaker 1: There's something else that's that's constantly in the head. You

879
00:50:07,600 --> 00:50:11,400
Speaker 1: gotta you gotta diffuse everything. And like depression is just

880
00:50:11,520 --> 00:50:14,200
Speaker 1: letting you just learn you that something's wrong with yourself

881
00:50:14,360 --> 00:50:18,279
Speaker 1: is just another sign. It's like another sign of like

882
00:50:19,719 --> 00:50:22,560
Speaker 1: like being like you know, like a warranted sign, like yeah,

883
00:50:22,800 --> 00:50:24,879
Speaker 1: it's just one part of your sense. Like that's why

884
00:50:25,160 --> 00:50:28,279
Speaker 1: we wouldn't get depressed if we didn't have no need

885
00:50:28,440 --> 00:50:33,160
Speaker 1: for it. Yeah, I'm saying that happens to us. That

886
00:50:33,480 --> 00:50:39,400
Speaker 1: doesn't we need fear, Like you know what I'm saying here,

887
00:50:39,520 --> 00:50:41,640
Speaker 1: you need all that ship. It's so powerful to me

888
00:50:41,760 --> 00:50:44,319
Speaker 1: that you say that, because I'm definitely somebody that has

889
00:50:44,520 --> 00:50:47,839
Speaker 1: experienced depression many times in my life at varying degrees. Now,

890
00:50:47,840 --> 00:50:51,160
Speaker 1: I've always been a highly functional depressed person, Like I've

891
00:50:51,160 --> 00:50:53,520
Speaker 1: always been able to like still execute life at a

892
00:50:53,600 --> 00:50:57,160
Speaker 1: high level. Um. But you know, I'm a deep feeler.

893
00:50:57,239 --> 00:51:01,440
Speaker 1: I'm a very emo person, and so I've had a

894
00:51:01,520 --> 00:51:04,880
Speaker 1: lot of different moments. Um. I also get seasonally depressed,

895
00:51:04,880 --> 00:51:07,160
Speaker 1: Like if I'm somewhere where it's dark and cold and rainy,

896
00:51:07,320 --> 00:51:09,520
Speaker 1: like I will be down. But when the sun is out,

897
00:51:09,600 --> 00:51:12,279
Speaker 1: I'm solar powered and I'm like, like, I can't feel

898
00:51:12,360 --> 00:51:15,600
Speaker 1: sad if the sun is shining on me. Um. But

899
00:51:15,719 --> 00:51:17,760
Speaker 1: part of what really helped me in my own journey

900
00:51:17,840 --> 00:51:21,319
Speaker 1: with depression, I remember I heard Mary Ann Williamson speak once.

901
00:51:21,360 --> 00:51:24,040
Speaker 1: I went to one of her events, and she talks

902
00:51:24,080 --> 00:51:26,600
Speaker 1: a lot about depression, and she said a similar to

903
00:51:26,719 --> 00:51:28,920
Speaker 1: point to what you just said, and it changed my

904
00:51:29,000 --> 00:51:31,400
Speaker 1: whole life, like it changed my whole worldview, like she

905
00:51:31,560 --> 00:51:35,279
Speaker 1: says she like for her, depression is that warning sign

906
00:51:35,400 --> 00:51:38,359
Speaker 1: from God, from the universe that it's time to level up,

907
00:51:38,440 --> 00:51:41,520
Speaker 1: it's time to change something. And so she looks at

908
00:51:41,640 --> 00:51:44,920
Speaker 1: whenever she feels depression coming on, almost like how a

909
00:51:45,040 --> 00:51:48,640
Speaker 1: bear would with hibernation, Like you get prepared for what

910
00:51:48,800 --> 00:51:51,720
Speaker 1: you know is about to happen, so you can protect

911
00:51:51,760 --> 00:51:53,880
Speaker 1: yourself and get yourself out of it, right, so you

912
00:51:53,920 --> 00:51:56,880
Speaker 1: don't just succumb to it. Um. And that was like

913
00:51:56,960 --> 00:52:00,280
Speaker 1: really revolutionary for me because I've never heard, like, whenever

914
00:52:00,400 --> 00:52:03,360
Speaker 1: people used to talk about depression or mental health, except

915
00:52:03,400 --> 00:52:06,040
Speaker 1: for recently, it was always kind of like in a

916
00:52:06,200 --> 00:52:08,879
Speaker 1: very shameful way, or in a way that was just like, well,

917
00:52:09,000 --> 00:52:11,560
Speaker 1: why don't you just think happy thoughts or just get

918
00:52:11,600 --> 00:52:13,759
Speaker 1: out of the house and do something. It's like, nah,

919
00:52:13,920 --> 00:52:16,560
Speaker 1: that's not really how it works, um. But when I

920
00:52:16,640 --> 00:52:18,560
Speaker 1: heard her talk like that, it changed the way that

921
00:52:18,600 --> 00:52:22,120
Speaker 1: I deal with it. So whenever I feel like overwhelmed

922
00:52:22,239 --> 00:52:26,040
Speaker 1: or I feel just a little off, I I like

923
00:52:26,280 --> 00:52:30,120
Speaker 1: will take the afternoon to focus on preparing myself for

924
00:52:30,239 --> 00:52:34,239
Speaker 1: this feeling. So like I'll write affirmation cards, or I'll

925
00:52:34,280 --> 00:52:37,120
Speaker 1: start meditating, or I do a lot of soundbold stuff

926
00:52:37,160 --> 00:52:40,480
Speaker 1: and like I'll make you know I'll make a playlist

927
00:52:40,719 --> 00:52:43,600
Speaker 1: that I know will will force me to find a

928
00:52:43,719 --> 00:52:46,279
Speaker 1: smile on a hard day, you know, just like all

929
00:52:46,320 --> 00:52:51,960
Speaker 1: these little hacks, if you will to just nourish yourself

930
00:52:52,080 --> 00:52:56,399
Speaker 1: when you're not in a good space. Yeah, that's that's

931
00:52:56,520 --> 00:53:04,560
Speaker 1: definitely important doing all that, like meditating, Like if they

932
00:53:04,880 --> 00:53:07,839
Speaker 1: should teach that in schools too, they should, I think

933
00:53:07,880 --> 00:53:11,279
Speaker 1: about it. They should not be sick. I mean, but

934
00:53:11,440 --> 00:53:14,040
Speaker 1: you know some parents and ship man, that's world is

935
00:53:14,080 --> 00:53:18,439
Speaker 1: so weird. Like some parents are so freaking weird. They'd

936
00:53:18,480 --> 00:53:22,640
Speaker 1: probably be pissed. Yeah, you got my sole meditated hearing.

937
00:53:22,719 --> 00:53:29,040
Speaker 1: Now those are the same parents that be like, you're

938
00:53:29,120 --> 00:53:33,000
Speaker 1: teaching science in the school, that's not How do you

939
00:53:33,080 --> 00:53:35,479
Speaker 1: how do you deal with depression whenever you feel it coming?

940
00:53:36,600 --> 00:53:41,720
Speaker 1: Um I haven't felt it in a minute, but recently

941
00:53:41,840 --> 00:53:45,280
Speaker 1: I got to golf like a year and some change,

942
00:53:45,400 --> 00:53:48,640
Speaker 1: and um, I was depressed right before that, and I

943
00:53:48,719 --> 00:53:51,080
Speaker 1: didn't even know I was depressed. Like sometimes that can

944
00:53:51,120 --> 00:53:53,880
Speaker 1: happen to you too, So I'm just not right. But

945
00:53:54,000 --> 00:53:56,359
Speaker 1: like like you said, when you're a functional you can

946
00:53:56,400 --> 00:53:59,600
Speaker 1: be functional and be depressed at the same time. Sometimes

947
00:53:59,640 --> 00:54:01,200
Speaker 1: you can just to be lost in space and I

948
00:54:01,320 --> 00:54:05,000
Speaker 1: know what's going on. So I found golf and it

949
00:54:05,160 --> 00:54:08,920
Speaker 1: gave me something to do before going to the studio.

950
00:54:09,000 --> 00:54:11,360
Speaker 1: What it was, what I really think it was my

951
00:54:11,560 --> 00:54:16,920
Speaker 1: life was I was going through more withdraws from the drugs.

952
00:54:18,080 --> 00:54:20,760
Speaker 1: You get what I'm saying, because I quit cold Turkey.

953
00:54:20,880 --> 00:54:23,920
Speaker 1: So it takes a long time to really because every

954
00:54:24,000 --> 00:54:26,719
Speaker 1: now and then, you you you get that urge, you

955
00:54:26,800 --> 00:54:28,759
Speaker 1: get that feeling, you just get gronging and you just

956
00:54:28,880 --> 00:54:31,759
Speaker 1: get aggy and like just weird, you know what I'm saying.

957
00:54:32,640 --> 00:54:34,560
Speaker 1: But I had something to do before I go to

958
00:54:34,640 --> 00:54:38,680
Speaker 1: the studio that was really really important for me and

959
00:54:38,800 --> 00:54:42,520
Speaker 1: good for me. Like being outside, you know what I'm saying,

960
00:54:42,640 --> 00:54:49,160
Speaker 1: Like going like we don't go outside. We don't go outside.

961
00:54:49,280 --> 00:54:52,239
Speaker 1: We go outside to take the trash. I'll walk to

962
00:54:52,280 --> 00:54:58,520
Speaker 1: our car going into the destination. Motherucker work out for

963
00:54:58,600 --> 00:55:02,319
Speaker 1: an hour ago, run and els or something. Thank you. Yeah,

964
00:55:02,400 --> 00:55:06,040
Speaker 1: mother's supposed to be outside, like back in the days,

965
00:55:06,120 --> 00:55:09,880
Speaker 1: even motherfucker's had to go outside for entertainment. Yeah, you

966
00:55:09,960 --> 00:55:13,440
Speaker 1: know what I'm saying. And like even if it's just

967
00:55:13,560 --> 00:55:15,759
Speaker 1: watching your neighbors on the porch, like you would be

968
00:55:17,000 --> 00:55:22,279
Speaker 1: go outside the community. Probably don't know five neighbors over here, right, Yeah,

969
00:55:22,320 --> 00:55:25,640
Speaker 1: I only know me and my neighbor to the left

970
00:55:25,680 --> 00:55:27,640
Speaker 1: of me talk all the time. But other than that,

971
00:55:27,960 --> 00:55:30,080
Speaker 1: I don't know nobody's name. You don't know the person

972
00:55:30,160 --> 00:55:32,520
Speaker 1: across the street and right there right now, Like where

973
00:55:32,560 --> 00:55:35,800
Speaker 1: I grew up in the hood, like I knew everybody

974
00:55:35,880 --> 00:55:38,959
Speaker 1: on the block, Like literally every person on the block

975
00:55:39,040 --> 00:55:42,920
Speaker 1: I knew. But it's different too, like as you, because

976
00:55:42,960 --> 00:55:45,520
Speaker 1: like you, you live in a very affluent community, you

977
00:55:45,560 --> 00:55:48,800
Speaker 1: know what I mean, Like like the world's change, you know,

978
00:55:49,040 --> 00:55:51,120
Speaker 1: like you're kind of like a lot of the people

979
00:55:51,200 --> 00:55:54,560
Speaker 1: in my neighborhood are very very old, um, and they

980
00:55:54,600 --> 00:55:57,399
Speaker 1: don't like the fact that a young black couple lives

981
00:55:57,440 --> 00:55:59,160
Speaker 1: on the street, you know what I mean. So they're

982
00:55:59,200 --> 00:56:01,920
Speaker 1: not really wanted me to come over with asking for

983
00:56:02,000 --> 00:56:06,400
Speaker 1: sugar or whatever. Yeah. I love that though, because it

984
00:56:06,560 --> 00:56:08,960
Speaker 1: is it is important to be outside, It is important

985
00:56:09,000 --> 00:56:13,200
Speaker 1: to connect with source. Like those are really useful tools

986
00:56:13,360 --> 00:56:16,320
Speaker 1: to even just growing yourself, giving yourself time to think,

987
00:56:17,160 --> 00:56:19,719
Speaker 1: you know, to not always have to be stimulated in

988
00:56:19,880 --> 00:56:24,160
Speaker 1: some way. Yeah, like um, talking to people outside of

989
00:56:24,200 --> 00:56:28,000
Speaker 1: your damn phone. Yeah, like you know what I'm saying,

990
00:56:28,080 --> 00:56:30,600
Speaker 1: Like we only talk to people outside of my phone,

991
00:56:30,680 --> 00:56:32,920
Speaker 1: and then when we're talking to somebody, were still all

992
00:56:33,040 --> 00:56:35,080
Speaker 1: on our phone. Thank you for coming on the show.

993
00:56:35,360 --> 00:56:41,799
Speaker 1: Thank you, I love you, I honor you. Thank you. App.

994
00:56:42,800 --> 00:56:44,640
Speaker 1: I think you're I just think you're a really really

995
00:56:44,680 --> 00:56:47,360
Speaker 1: incredible person. Que And I'm just I'm just so excited

996
00:56:47,360 --> 00:56:49,399
Speaker 1: for you because I think that you have been such

997
00:56:49,440 --> 00:56:51,839
Speaker 1: a great person, but now that you're at this new

998
00:56:52,000 --> 00:56:55,880
Speaker 1: evolution of yourself and you don't even fully realize like

999
00:56:56,040 --> 00:56:59,680
Speaker 1: oh my god, Like I'm just yeah, I'm just I'm

1000
00:56:59,719 --> 00:57:02,120
Speaker 1: just super hype for you at all times. I celebrate

1001
00:57:02,160 --> 00:57:05,000
Speaker 1: you at all times, and you're one of my favorite humans.

1002
00:57:05,320 --> 00:57:08,279
Speaker 1: Oh man, thank you so much. Man, congrats to you

1003
00:57:08,360 --> 00:57:11,520
Speaker 1: and everything to man. You know, taking a leap of

1004
00:57:11,600 --> 00:57:15,400
Speaker 1: faith doing things on your own now, and like, um,

1005
00:57:15,960 --> 00:57:18,920
Speaker 1: let's take you drop your nuts when you did that,

1006
00:57:20,400 --> 00:57:22,480
Speaker 1: you know what I mean, Like, it's take you. Gotta

1007
00:57:22,520 --> 00:57:25,360
Speaker 1: be bold to take a leap of faith and drop

1008
00:57:25,440 --> 00:57:28,280
Speaker 1: your nuts. That's for me and home and said, you

1009
00:57:28,360 --> 00:57:30,000
Speaker 1: know what I mean, like drop your nuts and go

1010
00:57:30,280 --> 00:57:34,680
Speaker 1: go after it like fuck it visualizing that happening and

1011
00:57:34,840 --> 00:57:37,720
Speaker 1: actually doing it, you know what I'm saying. That's a

1012
00:57:37,800 --> 00:57:41,160
Speaker 1: big step. So congrats to you man, you deserve it.

1013
00:57:41,560 --> 00:57:47,840
Speaker 1: Thank you, Thank you, everybody, stay open, peace big. Thank

1014
00:57:47,880 --> 00:57:50,880
Speaker 1: you for listening to this episode of The Dropping Gym's podcast.

1015
00:57:51,160 --> 00:57:54,240
Speaker 1: This show is executive produced by Adrian Scott and me

1016
00:57:54,640 --> 00:57:57,880
Speaker 1: Debbie Brown. Our theme music was created by producer Day

1017
00:57:57,920 --> 00:57:59,680
Speaker 1: One and the poem that you heard at the beginning

1018
00:57:59,680 --> 00:58:01,840
Speaker 1: of the show, well that was created especially for us

1019
00:58:01,880 --> 00:58:04,800
Speaker 1: by award winning poet Nambie okafor If you have a

1020
00:58:04,880 --> 00:58:08,080
Speaker 1: quick moment right now, please hit subscribe on the show

1021
00:58:08,240 --> 00:58:09,880
Speaker 1: and if you like what you heard, take it a

1022
00:58:09,920 --> 00:58:12,920
Speaker 1: step further and give us a five star rating. Until

1023
00:58:12,960 --> 00:58:15,000
Speaker 1: next time, you connect with me on I g at

1024
00:58:15,120 --> 00:58:18,800
Speaker 1: Debbie Brown or my website Debbie Brown dot com. Be blessed,

1025
00:58:19,560 --> 00:58:19,600
Speaker 1: h