WEBVTT - Feat Ajna Surah - Successful Men Will Bite You! 0:00:00.600 --> 0:00:03.120 It's a universal law that even my desire for it 0:00:03.160 --> 0:00:05.440 is the conjuring of it. I can feel it so deeply, 0:00:05.480 --> 0:00:10.080 giving it no other opportunity than to perfect itself and 0:00:10.119 --> 0:00:13.440 to manifest itself materially, so that may be somebody else 0:00:13.760 --> 0:00:16.000 experience some whole shit because they getting ready for me. 0:00:16.040 --> 0:00:17.760 Gonna get that whole shit out the system. When you've 0:00:17.800 --> 0:00:19.840 come over here, you'll be ready practice on them. 0:00:19.920 --> 0:00:22.800 Nigglas, what hurts you the most right now? 0:00:23.040 --> 0:00:23.680 In my life? 0:00:24.079 --> 0:00:28.040 Like right now, where does my pain come from? Disappointment 0:00:28.160 --> 0:00:31.520 in myself. I'm at the stage in my journey where 0:00:31.560 --> 0:00:34.920 I have to just apply what I learned without being 0:00:34.960 --> 0:00:36.280 resentful about how. 0:00:36.120 --> 0:00:36.680 I learned it. 0:00:38.520 --> 0:00:39.480 That's so important. 0:00:40.520 --> 0:00:42.920 And so when I see myself getting in my own way, 0:00:43.159 --> 0:00:47.160 it pains me because I know I'm holding up somebody 0:00:47.200 --> 0:00:50.400 else's blessing because I'm a walking, fucking asset. 0:00:51.479 --> 0:00:54.120 And I am the answer to prayer. How do I know? 0:00:54.400 --> 0:00:56.920 So many people say I thank God for you. I 0:00:56.960 --> 0:01:02.120 am the answer to prayer. What you and your feelings? 0:01:02.120 --> 0:01:04.160 You know what I'm saying in your bag today? He 0:01:04.240 --> 0:01:06.920 bit me today, like dealing with successful me, and they'll 0:01:06.920 --> 0:01:10.320 bite you. And that's and it's not intentional, but they'll 0:01:10.319 --> 0:01:12.319 bite you. He might have a ten thousand things on 0:01:12.400 --> 0:01:14.200 his mind. He say some shit to you. 0:01:14.160 --> 0:01:17.360 Today, like it and it just bite like he's just 0:01:17.400 --> 0:01:19.880 bite you. But you know, like he said. 0:01:19.640 --> 0:01:21.320 That, he ain't I'm wanting them. 0:01:21.360 --> 0:01:21.600 He not. 0:01:21.920 --> 0:01:24.640 He ain't intending to you know, he ain't trying to 0:01:24.720 --> 0:01:27.520 hurt me. He ain't trying to hurt me. That shit 0:01:27.640 --> 0:01:30.440 hurt wow, But he ain't trying to hurt me. I'm 0:01:30.480 --> 0:01:32.600 a whole space with my baby today. We're gonna talk 0:01:32.600 --> 0:01:34.440 about that later. I want to have a conversation with 0:01:34.520 --> 0:01:36.360 you about the way you say things to me. 0:01:36.640 --> 0:01:36.800 Now. 0:01:36.840 --> 0:01:40.560 Niggas want to allure me to death exactly, my man, 0:01:40.640 --> 0:01:43.640 Lord that my man looms old loon, new loom. 0:01:44.520 --> 0:01:48.320 Okay, okay, okay, all option money you know is up 0:01:48.320 --> 0:01:50.840 there and stuck that nigga when it's up there, man, 0:01:50.880 --> 0:01:52.080 it's stuck there. Shut up. 0:01:55.320 --> 0:01:57.760 This episode is brought to you by Prize Picks, the 0:01:57.800 --> 0:02:01.280 fantasy sports platform is changing the game for people like us. 0:02:01.480 --> 0:02:04.320 With Prize Picks, you can test your knowledge with picking 0:02:04.400 --> 0:02:07.120 over and under for your favorite player stats across a 0:02:07.240 --> 0:02:11.760 wide variety of sports, thank football, baseball, basketball, and beyond. 0:02:11.960 --> 0:02:14.680 So why wait, jump in the prize picks right now 0:02:14.919 --> 0:02:18.000 and bring more excitement to game day, whether you're cheering 0:02:18.040 --> 0:02:20.840 from the stands of the couch, prize picks, ask that 0:02:21.040 --> 0:02:25.720 extra layl fund for sports excitement again my slogan, why 0:02:25.760 --> 0:02:28.040 would you put some on the game when you could 0:02:28.040 --> 0:02:30.640 put some on the name. Let's get into those picks 0:02:30.639 --> 0:02:34.240 and start winning with prize picks today. I U tp cole. 0:02:34.440 --> 0:02:43.280 Let's get back to the show. Nothing, that's it. So 0:02:43.360 --> 0:02:46.520 I get that. But when I step in this business, 0:02:46.560 --> 0:02:49.520 the logical business man, it says to me, loan, because 0:02:49.560 --> 0:02:52.440 I've never clout chased ever, I've never been there. 0:02:52.560 --> 0:02:53.000 Do you know? 0:02:53.040 --> 0:02:55.200 How do you know the target that you got on 0:02:55.240 --> 0:02:58.200 your back because you not like them niggas? 0:02:59.240 --> 0:02:59.760 Do you know? 0:03:00.360 --> 0:03:02.440 Because if you think you got it in that in 0:03:02.520 --> 0:03:05.919 the real realm where shit goes down, when motherfuckers though, 0:03:05.919 --> 0:03:08.200 you would be in a trunk, stinking bitch and they'll 0:03:08.240 --> 0:03:10.720 find you four weeks later, if they ever find you. 0:03:11.240 --> 0:03:13.440 It's shit that go down in that room when motherfuckers, no, 0:03:13.480 --> 0:03:15.920 they can't get touched. What do you think these whole 0:03:15.960 --> 0:03:18.280 ass niggas out here saying do when they feel like 0:03:18.280 --> 0:03:19.200 they're untouchable. 0:03:19.600 --> 0:03:20.600 I stay over here. 0:03:21.080 --> 0:03:27.040 Check the businessman in me says, loon. You sit in 0:03:27.080 --> 0:03:30.919 the dog room, not dog room. You sit in the room, okay, 0:03:30.960 --> 0:03:33.960 with your ideas and your plans. Because I still look 0:03:34.000 --> 0:03:38.400 at millions of dollars of TI tied to content in podcasting, 0:03:38.800 --> 0:03:41.280 and I look at the boy. You can't do it, No, 0:03:41.480 --> 0:03:44.000 suck away. The money ain't worth going out like a squall. 0:03:44.960 --> 0:03:47.840 No matter what they give you. You don't trade your You gotta. 0:03:47.760 --> 0:03:51.200 Target on your back, baby, you do, and on a 0:03:51.200 --> 0:03:53.119 different type of time, in a different type of way. 0:03:53.360 --> 0:03:56.080 Because the game that you win, the game that you 0:03:56.280 --> 0:03:59.040 just took over. You just took over the motherfucking board. 0:03:59.080 --> 0:04:00.640 You just house the house. 0:04:02.440 --> 0:04:04.600 They want you out of here because you make a 0:04:04.640 --> 0:04:08.280 pussy nigga see itself. And they like to hide, they 0:04:08.400 --> 0:04:10.240 like to and you don't give them nowhere to hide. 0:04:11.440 --> 0:04:14.520 The culture needs you. Welcome, baby, waiting on you. 0:04:14.640 --> 0:04:17.040 Thank you, We welcome you, thank you. 0:04:17.160 --> 0:04:19.880 Oh yes, you're the heroes. Welcome, we welcome you. 0:04:19.880 --> 0:04:20.120 You know. 0:04:20.720 --> 0:04:25.800 But but you know, man, that's man. It's rough out 0:04:25.800 --> 0:04:29.360 here though. Yeah, but I think that that you're and 0:04:29.360 --> 0:04:31.839 it only the problem is with this conversation. 0:04:32.320 --> 0:04:33.800 It can't only come from me. 0:04:34.480 --> 0:04:37.760 That's what's dope about this, because nobody else could sit 0:04:37.839 --> 0:04:40.760 you here in content where and say, I've never cloud chased, 0:04:41.080 --> 0:04:44.320 I never had to get next to the trending topics. 0:04:44.360 --> 0:04:47.240 Whatever I speak on, I'm putting game next to it. 0:04:47.320 --> 0:04:48.800 No matter how you look at it. 0:04:49.040 --> 0:04:51.800 You see what I'm saying, There ain't never been no 0:04:51.800 --> 0:04:54.960 none of that. So I'm like the only person that 0:04:55.040 --> 0:04:57.360 can tell you, baby can be done. You can provide 0:04:57.440 --> 0:05:02.359 perspective to Sisa into city girls, into all of these 0:05:02.400 --> 0:05:05.880 young women that's traveling this entertainment industry. 0:05:05.960 --> 0:05:08.320 What the stakes are high, but. 0:05:08.240 --> 0:05:11.360 That comes with them as safety. Because here's the thing. 0:05:11.400 --> 0:05:12.880 You ain't gonna send me out on the dummy mission 0:05:12.880 --> 0:05:14.400 because you know I dance who came to the. 0:05:14.320 --> 0:05:17.719 Party with right, and we're gonna make sure that's done. 0:05:17.800 --> 0:05:20.040 So you see what I'm saying. So when it happens 0:05:20.080 --> 0:05:22.760 that way, you move differently. So a lot of women 0:05:22.800 --> 0:05:25.760 who are traumatized by moving that way for a whole ass. 0:05:25.600 --> 0:05:26.560 Nigga just hide. 0:05:27.560 --> 0:05:28.360 That's fucked up. 0:05:28.680 --> 0:05:30.800 And it's a lot of holeass niggas out here. The 0:05:30.920 --> 0:05:35.520 dichotomy of that is this a single mother can be 0:05:35.560 --> 0:05:39.080 a fuck boy factory. So we have to see ourselves 0:05:39.120 --> 0:05:42.279 and get these boys around some men for real, because 0:05:42.279 --> 0:05:43.560 you put it in him and you won't even know 0:05:43.560 --> 0:05:45.039 where you put it in him. An you just slide 0:05:45.080 --> 0:05:47.160 it in the cracks and he cracked up because you're 0:05:47.200 --> 0:05:49.040 the foundation trying to build destructure. 0:05:49.320 --> 0:05:55.359 Do you think that women have? And I only speak 0:05:55.400 --> 0:05:59.159 about women because that's who I deal with, right, Okay, 0:05:59.279 --> 0:06:02.400 hetero sex. So I want to be clear with that 0:06:02.480 --> 0:06:05.359 because it's a lot going on nowadays that's unclear. 0:06:05.839 --> 0:06:09.400 Sometimes it's like me and afraid to say I like women. 0:06:09.440 --> 0:06:10.880 Well, I got to be the only one sucking dick 0:06:10.920 --> 0:06:12.839 in my relationship, So that's how I feel about it. 0:06:12.920 --> 0:06:14.880 Be offended taking home with you if you'll bring you 0:06:14.920 --> 0:06:16.680 to offense. If I ever bring you to a fence, 0:06:17.160 --> 0:06:18.720 just jump over it so we can keep going. 0:06:19.520 --> 0:06:22.000 I love that, because I don't. 0:06:22.000 --> 0:06:22.279 I don't. 0:06:22.320 --> 0:06:25.000 I'm not here to offend you. I'm not. But if 0:06:25.000 --> 0:06:27.200 I ever bring you to a fence, just jump over. 0:06:29.200 --> 0:06:32.000 A lot of this you got. I love it like 0:06:32.120 --> 0:06:35.320 I love it. But but. 0:06:37.440 --> 0:06:39.039 What the fuck was I saying? 0:06:39.040 --> 0:06:41.520 I do that? Sometimes I do too, I do. 0:06:41.480 --> 0:06:43.440 It all the time. Just say something else. 0:06:44.880 --> 0:06:48.320 I was what I wanted to know because it was good. 0:06:48.360 --> 0:06:50.040 What was that? What was I headed with that? 0:06:50.960 --> 0:06:53.360 I was talking about women who end up in situations 0:06:53.360 --> 0:06:57.400 with whole ass niggas And I don't remember, I'm drawing. 0:06:57.120 --> 0:06:57.840 A blank me too. 0:06:57.880 --> 0:07:02.120 Ain't that crazy broadcasting it? But that's that's how poadcasting is, 0:07:02.440 --> 0:07:07.920 you know. Oh that's what I was gonna say. Do 0:07:07.960 --> 0:07:17.160 you believe that women have compromised their happiness for financial gain? 0:07:17.280 --> 0:07:18.160 Yeah? I have before? 0:07:19.720 --> 0:07:20.680 Yeah you have? 0:07:21.360 --> 0:07:27.320 How because I've been willing to tolerate a man that 0:07:27.400 --> 0:07:33.400 I that I didn't respect because it was financially convenient 0:07:33.960 --> 0:07:35.000 until it wasn't anymore. 0:07:36.200 --> 0:07:37.880 When it wasn't, did you run out of money or 0:07:37.920 --> 0:07:38.520 you ran out of. 0:07:38.680 --> 0:07:39.600 I ran out of respect? 0:07:42.240 --> 0:07:44.320 What made you do that? What made you do it 0:07:44.320 --> 0:07:44.920 to begin with? 0:07:45.000 --> 0:07:46.680 Because I thought it was safe. I thought it was 0:07:46.680 --> 0:07:47.320 a safe space. 0:07:48.560 --> 0:07:52.040 So it wasn't for financial compensation, even though I felt like, Okay, 0:07:52.040 --> 0:07:54.920 I can just breathe here, I can breathe. Get your 0:07:54.920 --> 0:07:57.440 shit together, like you're in a safe space now. Ex hell, girl, 0:07:57.440 --> 0:07:59.840 get your shit together, get your shit together so that 0:07:59.880 --> 0:08:02.440 you can be a real asset to your environment. Like 0:08:02.520 --> 0:08:05.160 he will never regret providing this safe space for you. 0:08:05.240 --> 0:08:08.160 So get your shit together and show him, show him 0:08:08.160 --> 0:08:10.800 how grateful you are. If the rest of your experience 0:08:10.840 --> 0:08:12.960 with this man and sheer gratitude, whatever he needs you, 0:08:13.120 --> 0:08:13.640 just do it. 0:08:13.880 --> 0:08:17.120 Get your shit together. And I wasn't safe enough to 0:08:17.200 --> 0:08:19.160 do it the way that it needed to be done. 0:08:19.440 --> 0:08:20.400 That's what I wonder. 0:08:20.480 --> 0:08:23.920 How can you continue to get up, get the bat 0:08:24.040 --> 0:08:27.200 and go to the plate with that same thought that 0:08:27.200 --> 0:08:27.840 I'm gonna hit a. 0:08:27.840 --> 0:08:30.480 Home because I love men and I love black I 0:08:31.240 --> 0:08:34.120 believe in him. Sh this shit like the lottery. You 0:08:34.160 --> 0:08:36.160 gotta play the win. Baby, I'm gonna scratch a winner. 0:08:36.760 --> 0:08:42.080 I'm gonna scratch a motherfucking winner, and every everything hell yeah, 0:08:42.080 --> 0:08:44.640 because everything just is. I can I feel the preparation. 0:08:46.400 --> 0:08:49.520 I feel the preparation. I'm a gift, and the creator 0:08:49.520 --> 0:08:52.000 will lay me at a real one's feet. He gonna 0:08:52.000 --> 0:08:54.920 know exactly what to do with me. He's gonna say, 0:08:54.920 --> 0:08:56.959 I've been waiting under you my whole motherfucking life. 0:08:57.000 --> 0:09:01.080 Come on over here. You're safe now. Until then, I 0:09:01.160 --> 0:09:02.559 just keep on preparing, just get ready. 0:09:03.080 --> 0:09:07.760 Those words have never the words that you're safe have 0:09:07.960 --> 0:09:11.000 never came out of certain people's mouths, that men have 0:09:11.080 --> 0:09:15.040 been protecting their entire existence. Right, so a man can 0:09:15.080 --> 0:09:17.200 be with a woman and protected her for the last 0:09:17.280 --> 0:09:21.480 fifteen years, provided worked his ass off, because men have 0:09:21.640 --> 0:09:23.120 been taught to be okay with. 0:09:24.600 --> 0:09:26.040 Just saying I took care of the family. 0:09:26.080 --> 0:09:27.840 If that's all I'm left with at the end of 0:09:27.880 --> 0:09:30.160 my life, I know men have died couldn't even get 0:09:30.160 --> 0:09:33.280 a tombstone while he was living. He took care of 0:09:33.280 --> 0:09:37.120 the family had and that was enough for him. But 0:09:37.160 --> 0:09:40.480 the expectations of what men are able to leave with, 0:09:41.720 --> 0:09:45.880 what men are able to obtain and keep for themselves, 0:09:46.960 --> 0:09:47.800 it is very low. 0:09:48.000 --> 0:09:49.360 It's like we don't get nothing. 0:09:49.800 --> 0:09:50.079 Well. 0:09:50.559 --> 0:09:53.320 I believe that it's also a certain type of woman 0:09:53.559 --> 0:09:57.120 that is that's very familiar and very quick to catch 0:09:57.360 --> 0:10:00.360 for man. And those are usually the woman that don't 0:10:00.400 --> 0:10:04.000 know how to unlock you, but know how to polish 0:10:04.080 --> 0:10:07.840 your lock. And then there are those of us that 0:10:08.000 --> 0:10:12.719 practiced our whole lives on unlocking men, so that when 0:10:12.720 --> 0:10:15.200 a motherfucker is worthy to be unlocked. 0:10:14.840 --> 0:10:17.800 We're gonna set him free when you say unlocked. 0:10:17.640 --> 0:10:23.880 Because their hearts be locked up, and when you unlock, your. 0:10:23.760 --> 0:10:27.560 Heart locked up. Maximum security? Is that? 0:10:27.600 --> 0:10:30.400 All right? God? 0:10:30.440 --> 0:10:32.760 Set you right next to a motherfucker skill and the key, 0:10:32.960 --> 0:10:37.439 the creator player, the Creator. 0:10:37.640 --> 0:10:39.320 Sit you next skeleton. 0:10:41.000 --> 0:10:44.760 You did that, but yeah, put it in the car, 0:10:44.840 --> 0:10:46.720 made it drive to you. 0:10:46.840 --> 0:10:52.600 Damn Lord, have mercy. But I'm serious, like, how do 0:10:52.679 --> 0:10:57.000 you unlock? Just being the same that word, Those words 0:10:57.080 --> 0:10:58.480 are so powerful. 0:10:58.040 --> 0:10:59.760 For me, Yeah, because they come with unlocked. 0:11:00.440 --> 0:11:00.760 Yes. 0:11:01.440 --> 0:11:03.160 And so when a man here is you know, you 0:11:03.360 --> 0:11:07.679 safe over here, and he believes it, but it's hard 0:11:07.679 --> 0:11:10.079 to believe into his test it. So I damnly gotta 0:11:10.160 --> 0:11:13.079 damage you to prove to me that that I'm safe here. 0:11:13.200 --> 0:11:16.199 And that's the thing that that is, that is your 0:11:16.480 --> 0:11:20.120 insecurity in the safety because life is going to present 0:11:20.200 --> 0:11:23.600 opportunity for you to see it without you initiating it anyway. 0:11:24.640 --> 0:11:26.719 You don't have to do anything. You don't got to 0:11:26.800 --> 0:11:29.400 rush the process because the Creator is kind to us. 0:11:29.480 --> 0:11:32.040 The Creator will show you. So just don't rush the 0:11:32.080 --> 0:11:37.480 process and be be so aware that you see what 0:11:37.520 --> 0:11:40.240 you see when it's being shown to you. And the 0:11:40.280 --> 0:11:42.439 Creator is kind. The Creator is a plurb. The creators 0:11:42.440 --> 0:11:45.160 show it to us multiple times. You don't got to 0:11:45.200 --> 0:11:47.400 initiate something. But if you don't see it in the 0:11:47.480 --> 0:11:50.760 area that you're initiating. You will, you will totally dismiss 0:11:50.800 --> 0:11:52.600 that the Creator has been showing it to you exactly 0:11:52.600 --> 0:11:55.000 where you need to see it, right here. But because 0:11:55.040 --> 0:11:59.200 your perspective is different, because you won't change so that 0:11:59.240 --> 0:12:01.760 you can see it differently to shift yourself so that 0:12:01.800 --> 0:12:04.320 you can have an alternate perspective, you will miss it 0:12:04.640 --> 0:12:06.480 and you'll keep trying to make it happen for yourself. 0:12:06.520 --> 0:12:08.680 Sometimes all the Creator needs you to do is just 0:12:08.720 --> 0:12:11.640 show up, because God show up when you show up 0:12:11.760 --> 0:12:15.640 inside of you. To just show up. And a lot 0:12:15.640 --> 0:12:19.040 of times we don't show up. We always on the way. 0:12:19.480 --> 0:12:20.840 Yeah, we always on the way. 0:12:21.559 --> 0:12:25.240 But I think it's so important that that that we 0:12:25.280 --> 0:12:29.160 talk about this men feeling or hearing. 0:12:30.720 --> 0:12:32.439 You can't tell a man that he's safe. 0:12:32.679 --> 0:12:35.160 You can't even tell them that you love him, tell 0:12:35.200 --> 0:12:37.400 them that turn endearment term. 0:12:38.760 --> 0:12:43.040 This is what I've learned about men, and I've a 0:12:43.120 --> 0:12:46.040 few men as practice. 0:12:45.240 --> 0:12:47.840 On a lot of levels, because. 0:12:48.080 --> 0:12:51.040 When you made for a real one, any man that 0:12:51.080 --> 0:12:55.600 you encounter is practiced until he proved that that's where 0:12:55.600 --> 0:12:58.679 you're supposed to be. So I've encountered I've encountered men 0:12:58.720 --> 0:13:00.800 that said I deserve you, and I just tell him, 0:13:00.840 --> 0:13:04.000 we'll see and if it comes out that you don't 0:13:04.040 --> 0:13:06.960 deserve me, I'm not resentful because you helped me practice, 0:13:07.400 --> 0:13:10.319 because I took a skill away from this life. 0:13:10.480 --> 0:13:12.800 Because you're gonna live life anyway. She life is time. 0:13:12.920 --> 0:13:16.040 Yeah, but the herdbreak attached to the practice you had, 0:13:16.080 --> 0:13:18.439 like you ain't losing nothing with this listen. 0:13:19.040 --> 0:13:24.000 Yes, but I'm not losing anything. I'm investing. I'm investing 0:13:25.440 --> 0:13:27.400 because I'm made for a real one, and he gonna 0:13:27.440 --> 0:13:29.239 know exactly what the fuck. 0:13:29.040 --> 0:13:29.760 To do with me. 0:13:31.559 --> 0:13:33.800 Do you have any daughters? Yes? 0:13:33.840 --> 0:13:34.360 I have a daughter. 0:13:35.000 --> 0:13:36.000 How does she receive you? 0:13:36.480 --> 0:13:40.240 I placed my daughter up for adoption. She's seventeen years old. 0:13:40.240 --> 0:13:43.720 I was twenty five. I felt she deserved better than me. 0:13:44.400 --> 0:13:45.400 I didn't know what I didn't. 0:13:45.400 --> 0:13:47.439 Now do you ket to get into any of that 0:13:47.679 --> 0:13:48.840 background in yours? 0:13:48.880 --> 0:13:50.720 Not right now, but we definitely can. 0:13:50.920 --> 0:13:54.679 Okay, So do you ket to get into so you 0:13:54.760 --> 0:13:56.120 just said she deserved better than you? 0:13:56.160 --> 0:13:59.439 At that time, I was so sad and so depressed. 0:14:00.800 --> 0:14:03.520 I just I wasn't a happy person, and my life 0:14:03.559 --> 0:14:07.360 was different, you know, thinking hustlers and stuff, you know, 0:14:07.880 --> 0:14:11.319 her dad was fresh out of prison, and I didn't 0:14:11.360 --> 0:14:14.400 want I didn't want to be his baby mama, and 0:14:15.360 --> 0:14:17.640 he was still living a different type of life and 0:14:17.679 --> 0:14:19.920 I wanted a different type of life for myself. And 0:14:19.960 --> 0:14:21.800 I didn't see the future. That's what he told me. 0:14:22.720 --> 0:14:26.120 Like I think we share space, you know, here and there, 0:14:26.200 --> 0:14:30.120 he and I we communicate, and I'm proud of the 0:14:30.120 --> 0:14:30.920 man that he became. 0:14:31.040 --> 0:14:33.320 And he told me, you didn't see you didn't see me. 0:14:34.160 --> 0:14:34.760 I saw you. 0:14:34.840 --> 0:14:36.800 I always knew that you were amazing, but you didn't 0:14:36.840 --> 0:14:40.360 see me past who you met me as that's. 0:14:40.200 --> 0:14:44.160 A problem some women have, though, Yeah, I think they 0:14:44.280 --> 0:14:46.400 take snapshots of I agree. 0:14:46.520 --> 0:14:48.760 Yeah, And at that space in my life, we were 0:14:48.800 --> 0:14:50.760 just That was some of the best fucking of my life. 0:14:50.840 --> 0:14:52.960 Like we were just. We were just young and the 0:14:53.000 --> 0:14:55.640 sex was great. And when I ended up pregnant, I 0:14:55.680 --> 0:14:57.520 didn't want the life that he provided for me at 0:14:57.520 --> 0:15:00.600 that time. And I didn't know what I knew now 0:15:00.920 --> 0:15:04.600 in my early early twenties about how to be that 0:15:04.720 --> 0:15:06.880 level of support. I just knew how to be loyal. 0:15:07.360 --> 0:15:10.400 I didn't know how to be supportive and loyal because 0:15:10.400 --> 0:15:14.240 support comes from identifying where the support is needed, because 0:15:14.280 --> 0:15:18.480 if you try to support somebody where reinforcement already is, 0:15:18.960 --> 0:15:20.880 they don't need you there. No matter how much you 0:15:20.920 --> 0:15:23.320 try to continue to support them, You're not needed there. 0:15:23.800 --> 0:15:27.280 You got to identify where you're needed and go where 0:15:27.280 --> 0:15:30.640 you're needed. And I didn't know exactly how to identify 0:15:30.680 --> 0:15:33.600 where I was needed at that stage in my journey, 0:15:33.680 --> 0:15:35.600 but it taught me how to cultivate the skill. 0:15:36.080 --> 0:15:39.120 With you being a healer now or help wait, a. 0:15:39.120 --> 0:15:42.800 Healer, you'll be saying that. I don't never say I 0:15:42.840 --> 0:15:45.360 don't know. I just I just have. 0:15:45.560 --> 0:15:47.080 That's what I'm saying. And I don't. 0:15:47.160 --> 0:15:49.080 I hate that too because dudes come up to me 0:15:49.120 --> 0:15:50.920 as mean, you saved my life, and I'm like, I 0:15:50.960 --> 0:15:51.440 get that a. 0:15:51.360 --> 0:15:54.520 Lot with tears their eyes. I'm just here to help. 0:15:54.520 --> 0:15:56.680 I just helped you help yourself. And that's why that's 0:15:56.720 --> 0:15:58.600 part of the healing place. That's part of our mission. 0:15:59.160 --> 0:16:00.960 Like we heal the world by healing ourselves. You want 0:16:00.960 --> 0:16:02.480 to know what I do over here with this community, 0:16:02.520 --> 0:16:05.400 we heal the world by healing ourselves people. 0:16:06.280 --> 0:16:10.520 Yes, so how does your daughter take you now? Like 0:16:10.760 --> 0:16:14.360 being like this help her this? 0:16:14.680 --> 0:16:17.360 I don't know, patient individual. 0:16:16.840 --> 0:16:19.000 I don't know because I haven't had communication with her 0:16:19.000 --> 0:16:21.400 in quite some time. But her dad and I we 0:16:21.440 --> 0:16:25.000 talk about things. I won't share with the things in detail. 0:16:25.120 --> 0:16:28.080 I wouldn't breach our confidence. But I'm right here. Whenever 0:16:28.120 --> 0:16:30.920 she ready, I'm ready and I done heal so much 0:16:30.920 --> 0:16:33.720 since you've been gone, girl, I got some things I 0:16:33.720 --> 0:16:36.040 can teach you, I got some love to give you. 0:16:36.440 --> 0:16:39.640 I got love on reserve for you. So whenever you're ready, 0:16:39.680 --> 0:16:40.240 I'm ready. 0:16:40.600 --> 0:16:45.040 It's so beautiful and it's rough. Though it's rough, it 0:16:45.040 --> 0:16:45.760 ain't as easy. 0:16:45.840 --> 0:16:47.280 It is because I gave her to people that I 0:16:47.280 --> 0:16:49.440 thought were better than me to find out the hard 0:16:49.440 --> 0:16:52.680 way that they not only are they not better than me, 0:16:52.720 --> 0:16:56.280 they're not good people. And so you know, life, life, 0:16:56.320 --> 0:16:59.440 I learn you and to do a number, it will, 0:16:59.600 --> 0:17:03.560 it'll you up like for fuck you up. Well, welcome 0:17:03.560 --> 0:17:06.680 to the healing place, because over here we unfuck ourselves. 0:17:08.040 --> 0:17:11.400 And I think about having a daughter. But this new age, 0:17:11.560 --> 0:17:13.439 this new era, is really rough on me. 0:17:13.560 --> 0:17:15.960 So what would I go back to the conversation because 0:17:15.960 --> 0:17:19.440 we can still talk, because the information wouldn't change even 0:17:19.480 --> 0:17:22.880 if I don't necessarily relate at this time, the information 0:17:22.960 --> 0:17:23.639 is still solid. 0:17:24.080 --> 0:17:25.200 So what was your question? 0:17:25.280 --> 0:17:25.480 King? 0:17:25.920 --> 0:17:28.080 I just want I mean, I just I want to 0:17:28.119 --> 0:17:31.880 know how she receives you. I mean to see someone. 0:17:31.640 --> 0:17:33.680 Like I can tell you about my nieces. 0:17:33.880 --> 0:17:36.920 Okay, because you know, let me let me put this down, 0:17:36.960 --> 0:17:38.439 to put perspective around it. 0:17:38.440 --> 0:17:41.119 It's like to see to know I wasn't patient with you, 0:17:41.200 --> 0:17:43.040 and you see me so patient. 0:17:42.640 --> 0:17:46.120 Now, well that you know, what's a good relationship with that? 0:17:46.359 --> 0:17:50.560 My eldest son. Men be over here, like I know 0:17:50.600 --> 0:17:52.240 you see me as a woman, and I relate to 0:17:52.280 --> 0:17:53.160 women differently. 0:17:53.520 --> 0:17:54.600 But it be men that I be. 0:17:54.880 --> 0:17:55.359 I'm here. 0:17:55.400 --> 0:17:57.800 It be men and men begetting this work. I said, 0:17:58.200 --> 0:18:00.920 I said, your present showed up. I like it when 0:18:00.960 --> 0:18:02.480 you show up time. 0:18:02.480 --> 0:18:03.080 I like that. 0:18:03.440 --> 0:18:06.600 And on nothing I like it. But it ain't nothing free, 0:18:06.680 --> 0:18:10.479 but I like it. But here's the thing like a 0:18:10.480 --> 0:18:12.879 good relationship with that would be my eldest son. I 0:18:12.960 --> 0:18:14.800 have a son that's in his twenties, and I have 0:18:14.840 --> 0:18:18.199 a son that turned thirteen. They're eight years apart. My 0:18:18.280 --> 0:18:20.679 twenty year old son and I we grew up together, 0:18:22.600 --> 0:18:24.320 so he got a different mother. He got me rough 0:18:24.320 --> 0:18:27.679 around the edges. I was a very violent, angry person. 0:18:28.280 --> 0:18:29.840 I put my hands in my teeth and my feet 0:18:29.880 --> 0:18:33.240 on people. So my thirteen year old he has an 0:18:33.440 --> 0:18:37.080 entirely different mother at the expense of his eldest brother 0:18:37.960 --> 0:18:42.399 because I practiced on him, I practiced being a mommy 0:18:42.520 --> 0:18:46.639 on him. Now I'm a better mother, much much better 0:18:46.680 --> 0:18:49.640 mother with his brother. But me and him, we got 0:18:49.640 --> 0:18:52.240 some healing to do. So what I do is I 0:18:52.280 --> 0:18:56.920 make myself available when he tells me how I injured 0:18:57.040 --> 0:19:00.719 him at certain stages of his journey, even though I 0:19:00.800 --> 0:19:03.960 didn't mean it. Because you can fuck some shit up 0:19:04.119 --> 0:19:10.760 unintentionally unintentional consequence. Yes, I suffer the consequences. And instead 0:19:10.760 --> 0:19:15.280 of making excuses for my decisions that hurt him no 0:19:15.320 --> 0:19:18.480 matter what they were, I asked him, how can I 0:19:18.520 --> 0:19:20.399 support you right now on your journey? 0:19:22.160 --> 0:19:26.360