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Speaker 1: What's at this lift service at Mantel la yee, I'm

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Speaker 1: g g maguire, I'm we have to bring up heart

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Speaker 1: with us. How are you feeling, I'm feeling good. Thanks

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Speaker 1: for asking, but you look amazing well, thank you, thank you,

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Speaker 1: thank you, thank you. Now we did get a chance

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Speaker 1: to see the screener for Behind every Man, so I

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Speaker 1: haven't even seen it yet. How you haven't really know.

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Speaker 1: I'm going to watch it with the rest of the

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Speaker 1: world on Saturday. It was very interesting. We learned a

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Speaker 1: lot of that was the goal. That's the goal, because

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Speaker 1: I do feel like, you know, when you showed up

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Speaker 1: and you were engaged to lamar Odom, people definitely were like, Okay,

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Speaker 1: what's the motive here, what's going on with her? Who

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Speaker 1: is she? But I do feel like it did give

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Speaker 1: it some good insight, just into like your upbringing, who

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Speaker 1: you are as a person, and all the struggles that

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Speaker 1: you've gone through to make you who you are today. Absolutely, um,

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Speaker 1: I was just honored to have been chosen because during

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Speaker 1: that relationship, I would always say, like, what is wrong

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Speaker 1: with everybody? Like they don't even know me, they have

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Speaker 1: no idea you know who I am and you know

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Speaker 1: that I am supposed to be in this position, and

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Speaker 1: so I think the show really showcased a lot of

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Speaker 1: those answers, you know, um so, and it was just

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Speaker 1: a great opportunity. Is it kind of better? Sweet now?

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Speaker 1: Since we know that y'all are not together and Lamar

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Speaker 1: is pretty much obviously all through that uh documentary if

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Speaker 1: you want to call um you know, to be honest,

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Speaker 1: it doesn't take away from the excitement that I feel

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Speaker 1: about my story because it's really my story. It sucks

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Speaker 1: that we can't be promoting it together because we created

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Speaker 1: it together. You know. Obviously I was chosen for the

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Speaker 1: show because I was behind him at one point, you know,

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Speaker 1: um and so, and I kind of like my heart

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Speaker 1: just kind of goes out to him because it's like, all,

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Speaker 1: this is another thing we did together that now we

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Speaker 1: have to do separately. So but I've just really been

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Speaker 1: trying to focus on you know, this story is about me,

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Speaker 1: you know, and I'm excited to see my mom had

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Speaker 1: to say, you know, because we really had to push

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Speaker 1: to get her one there that was sad, Oh don't

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Speaker 1: tell me that. I don't know. I'm just saying. Surprise

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Speaker 1: was like she was telling, you know, it made you

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Speaker 1: tear up a little just seeing some of that. She cried,

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Speaker 1: you know that she kind of had to get coached

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Speaker 1: through some parts. But I can only imagine. I mean,

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Speaker 1: my mom has been through a lot so and so

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Speaker 1: have you, yes with her without her, so we are

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Speaker 1: both on the other side of it. So that's the

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Speaker 1: good thing. People don't really know why you guys broke up,

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Speaker 1: Like we just saw it happened, and we saw that

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Speaker 1: you were no longer together. And then we saw he

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Speaker 1: said you were holding his social media accounts hostage, Like

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Speaker 1: what was that? I think he's still saying that. Um,

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Speaker 1: he actually just told me that we interviewed him. I

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Speaker 1: interviewed him on my morning show, and he told me

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Speaker 1: that she still have his socials and everything. Okay, UM,

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Speaker 1: so you know, I am allowing Lamar to create whatever

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Speaker 1: narrative wants to create. I didn't want to get into

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Speaker 1: the back and forth thing, you know. I started a

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Speaker 1: little bit, just showed a few things of what was

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Speaker 1: on my end, and I said, you know what, UM,

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Speaker 1: I'm gonna allow my page, my personality, my actions to

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Speaker 1: show who I am and where my energy really is,

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Speaker 1: you know, And I think that over the last couple

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Speaker 1: of weeks, I've done that. Um, in regards to your question, Angela,

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Speaker 1: it just didn't work out. You know. I don't want

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Speaker 1: to speak on specifics because then it will get into

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Speaker 1: a back and forth and I just feel like I'm

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Speaker 1: moving forward. UM. There's a lot of things that I

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Speaker 1: could have responded to that I'm continuing to not respond to,

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Speaker 1: you know, but I will say this, like in regard

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Speaker 1: to his social media, like anyone who gets hacked or

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Speaker 1: feels like they don't have control of their page, Instagram

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Speaker 1: has a great support system where you could just contact

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Speaker 1: them and just get something new. You know, you can

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Speaker 1: get a new email, path s, work, whatever it is.

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Speaker 1: So if him and his team have not figured that

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Speaker 1: out because they believe that I have something, then maybe

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Speaker 1: they might need a different team. Him and his manager

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Speaker 1: both said is linked to your emails? Because I asked him,

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Speaker 1: I'm like, aren't you posting and things like that, and

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Speaker 1: he said, yeah, you know, I can't change the password

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Speaker 1: I'm logged in, but it goes straight to her emails.

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Speaker 1: We've tried to contact, and then he even kind of solicited,

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Speaker 1: like anybody that works for Instagram or Twitter, if you

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Speaker 1: can reach out to me. I would love for you

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Speaker 1: to help because she's definitely holding it hot. Well, I'll

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Speaker 1: say this, if I had access to his page, guys,

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Speaker 1: I would have took a lot of stuff down a

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Speaker 1: long time ago. Okay, Um, especially the video that's blatantly

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Speaker 1: disrespecting me. Let's just be honest. You know, like, if

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Speaker 1: I had control over anything on his page, anything disrespected

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Speaker 1: to Sabrina would have been gone. That's all I'm going

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Speaker 1: to say. And I hope whatever struggles they're having they

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Speaker 1: figure it out soon. Why do you think he's making

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Speaker 1: that attention? It's a storyline to run with. And maybe

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Speaker 1: he truly does believe that. I mean, I haven't talked

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Speaker 1: to him, you know, he may really believe that I

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Speaker 1: have access to it. I just don't know a woman

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Speaker 1: who would have access to that page that would allow

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Speaker 1: disrespect to be happening. You know. Um, with the snap

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Speaker 1: of a click of a button, I can shut the

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Speaker 1: whole thing down if I had access to it. Um.

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Speaker 1: But also all I can say is I don't If

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Speaker 1: I tried to log into his page right now, it

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Speaker 1: will literally show his phone number and whatever email address

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Speaker 1: that has been changed. Obviously throughout our duration of our relationship,

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Speaker 1: I had access to everything at one point. You know, Um,

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Speaker 1: that's kind of normal, I think when um and him

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Speaker 1: as well. You know, he knew how to get right

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Speaker 1: into my phone. But the whole time, I don't know

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Speaker 1: if that because my man ain't got no ac well

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Speaker 1: in our relationship, Okay, I think I think Lamar was

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Speaker 1: just kind of used to people doing so and things

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Speaker 1: for him, and so I kind of just replace that

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Speaker 1: and just step into that role. He's also not very

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Speaker 1: social media savvy, so um, a lot of times I

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Speaker 1: would have to help him find d M post certain things.

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Speaker 1: You know, he would do a lot of contracts with

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Speaker 1: people that involved having the post, having to at people

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Speaker 1: tagged them. He didn't want to do those things, so um,

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Speaker 1: and then he forgets a lot of his log ins.

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Speaker 1: So we all always right, so but with me so

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Speaker 1: I can remember it, I put it in my notes,

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Speaker 1: I have it written down somewhere, you know, but that's

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Speaker 1: only accessible if you can get into the iPhone. So um. Anyways,

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Speaker 1: I did have access to access to it at one

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Speaker 1: point when we broke up, I literally deleted everything off

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Speaker 1: of my phone. I let him know I was doing that.

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Speaker 1: I told him, if you need help resetting the password,

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Speaker 1: I will let I will help you. He refused to

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Speaker 1: take the help. And the craziest thing is his manager

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Speaker 1: um him. They have not once contacted me and asked

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Speaker 1: me for anything, not one time since they made that statement,

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Speaker 1: the original statement. Have they said, hey, do you have

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Speaker 1: his password or whatever? So, um, I just didn't want

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Speaker 1: to get into the back and forth, but Sabrina, I

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Speaker 1: do want to say I'm sorry that things didn't work out.

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Speaker 1: I know a lot of times we go into these

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Speaker 1: relationships and we do not anticipate all the drama and

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Speaker 1: how things could possibly come to an end. Like you

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Speaker 1: fall in love and you think this is it, and

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Speaker 1: then you never think that the person that you fell

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Speaker 1: in love with that it could end up like this,

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Speaker 1: you know. So I do want to say that I

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Speaker 1: am sorry that things didn't work out for you. So

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Speaker 1: for you that do not feel sorry for me to

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Speaker 1: any I'm not gonna sorry for you, but I'm saying

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Speaker 1: I'm sorry because I know we never get into a

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Speaker 1: situation thinking it's gonna go as left publicly, and I

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Speaker 1: know that's not easy too publicly because people have painted

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Speaker 1: you as the bad person, you know, she's manipulative and

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Speaker 1: he's taking advantage of the situations. He's cloud chasing. You know,

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Speaker 1: how do you respond when people say things like that.

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Speaker 1: I don't. I do not respond. I just continue to

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Speaker 1: operate in my world, in my space, and it's working

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Speaker 1: out very well for me. To be honest, Um, I

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Speaker 1: think the more that I try to come back, which

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Speaker 1: I haven't. But when I first first first saw the

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Speaker 1: stuff about the passwords, my manager was literally like, is

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Speaker 1: there anything you can post to show that you don't

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Speaker 1: have that on your phone? I said sure. After I

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Speaker 1: posted that I was done, I was like, it doesn't

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Speaker 1: matter what he says. Moving forward, as long as there's

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Speaker 1: nothing directly about my kids, I am not responding to anything,

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Speaker 1: you know, I am just not doing it because my

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Speaker 1: focus is on myself, that is it. And the more

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Speaker 1: I continue to engage with people on social media that

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Speaker 1: could talk to me in real life, the more I'm

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Speaker 1: moving in the opposite direction, you know, And I'm really

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Speaker 1: just moving forward, so I continue to have forward momentum

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Speaker 1: when I do not respond. Why do you think Matt

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Speaker 1: Barnes had something to say about you, but and you

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Speaker 1: responded to him? He was one of the only people

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Speaker 1: I did see respond to. But you know what you

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Speaker 1: think made him say something? I think it's what I said.

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Speaker 1: It was that he liked men. Oh, and that's what

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Speaker 1: I told him. I think only someone that is bisexual

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Speaker 1: or homosexual would want to personally say something to a

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Speaker 1: woman that they have never met and know nothing about.

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Speaker 1: I think that is a very female and feminine trait. Well,

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Speaker 1: he probably was really just sticking up for his book.

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Speaker 1: But but he that's not his boy. But that's not

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Speaker 1: his boy. That's not his boy. And so that and

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Speaker 1: I actually had a personal conversation with something after that,

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Speaker 1: because if I was your boy, where were you during

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Speaker 1: other moments when I was his only boy? You get

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Speaker 1: what I'm saying. So where were you at when Kobe passed?

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Speaker 1: When were you at when he was feeling some type

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Speaker 1: of way about people find out that he's sold his rings?

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Speaker 1: You know, like, don't be his boy just because you

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Speaker 1: see a girl's dancing. I mean, there's so many opportunities

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Speaker 1: you could have showed up to be his boy, It's

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Speaker 1: all I'm saying. So it's easy to say, oh, this

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Speaker 1: is my boy, but no it's not. You don't even

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Speaker 1: have his phone number. You don't even know how to

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Speaker 1: reach him. M hm. Now let me ask you that.

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Speaker 1: So you haven't watched the episode yet, right, so are

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Speaker 1: you going to watch it when it comes out? I am.

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Speaker 1: I'm really excited about Um my friend Jasmine, who's actually

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Speaker 1: on the episode. I'm sure she's the one thing I

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Speaker 1: don't know, Um how much of her is on there? Um?

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Speaker 1: Her family? Uh, just some close friends, um, and that's

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Speaker 1: probably it. Like just a very intimate setting. I'm kind

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Speaker 1: of anxious. I don't want to be out around a

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Speaker 1: lot of people because I really feel like watching my

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Speaker 1: mom is gonna make me emotional. So well it will okay,

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Speaker 1: Well yeah, so just a lot just around some really

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Speaker 1: close friends and family. I was gonna ask you, did

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Speaker 1: your friends and family how did they feel about your relationship?

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Speaker 1: Where they ever? Like, I don't know about this one

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Speaker 1: because they're very somebody else the guy that you were

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Speaker 1: with before. Yeah, so um, some of them were kind

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Speaker 1: of like alright, Sabrina, what we're doing here? You know,

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Speaker 1: how how long are we doing this? And um, others

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Speaker 1: the more seasoned, we're kind of like, you know, push through,

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Speaker 1: give us some time. Things can change. Um. But the

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Speaker 1: thing is like they knew the very intimate details of

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Speaker 1: the relationship because they were here and you know, Lamar

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Speaker 1: was living with me in Cleveland, Ohio, so they saw everything.

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Speaker 1: Um and so well, I'll say this, when we broke up,

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Speaker 1: like they were not surprised and they just really wanted

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Speaker 1: to see me happy, and like they definitely are seeing

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Speaker 1: that now. Like you know, you focus so much on

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Speaker 1: another person that you kind of lose yourself. And um,

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Speaker 1: I did a good job with you know, continuing to

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Speaker 1: work out and self caring those things, but it's like

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Speaker 1: just like my spiritual self, my emotional self, you know,

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Speaker 1: gets lost in trying to support this relationship, you know,

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Speaker 1: and support the person you're in a relationship with. So

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Speaker 1: I don't have to be concerned with that anymore. So

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Speaker 1: I really just really get to focus on me. And

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Speaker 1: I just kind of forgot how dope I can be

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Speaker 1: at times, like you know, just being hodest, you know, like, wow,

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Speaker 1: I forgot to do this and I forgot I am this,

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Speaker 1: you know, like because it hasn't been about me. Um.

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Speaker 1: So that's just been enjoying for them to watch and

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Speaker 1: just like refreshing for me to feel. Now the beginning, y'all,

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Speaker 1: wasn't having sex. And do you do that when you

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Speaker 1: get into relationships? Do you be like, all right, no,

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Speaker 1: we're not gonna have sex into a certain amount of

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Speaker 1: time or did you just try that with him? Every

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Speaker 1: relationship has been different, Um, this one in particular, I

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Speaker 1: decided I was gonna wait because I just heard about

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Speaker 1: his reputation, you know, and I just needed to see

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Speaker 1: who he was, you know, and sex can kind of

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Speaker 1: complicate that, um, And I just needed to see, you know,

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Speaker 1: what are you here for? You know, what would the

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Speaker 1: interaction be like if we're not being intimate? And in

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Speaker 1: the beginning, I think that's what really built a friendship

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Speaker 1: for us, because we spent a lot of time with

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Speaker 1: each other but was not having sex. So what was

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Speaker 1: it that made you decide to go ahead and give

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Speaker 1: him something? Give up the ring? No? No? When we

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Speaker 1: proposed to me, When when he proposed to me, we

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Speaker 1: were abstinent. Um. We didn't have sex that night any

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Speaker 1: like no night around that we were abstinent um. But

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Speaker 1: I think it was just, you know, he showed he

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Speaker 1: was really committed to the relationship, you know, Like I

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Speaker 1: had a lot of boundaries that had at of no

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Speaker 1: I'm not doing no, I don't allow and he was

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Speaker 1: just like okay, okay, hey, UM didn't cross those boundaries.

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Speaker 1: And so I just really felt like, you know what,

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Speaker 1: he's really serious. You know, if he's done all of

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Speaker 1: this and has not gotten anything, you know, sexually, for me,

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Speaker 1: he may really be serious about this. I've never gone

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Speaker 1: through accidence in a relationship, so so oh wow, if

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Speaker 1: I have, really it really helps you experience real intimacy.

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Speaker 1: So remove some questions about accedence. Okay, you can't have sex,

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Speaker 1: but are there other things that you can do? Like

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Speaker 1: what I mean, you can, but we chose not to

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Speaker 1: because I'm just not strong enough. I'm gonna be honest.

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Speaker 1: So it's like we were there, we might as well

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Speaker 1: keep it going, you know. So for me, it was

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Speaker 1: just like, let's not even play around with this. You

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Speaker 1: can kind like those are all intimacy, like real intimacy.

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Speaker 1: That's why I say you experienced real intimacy when you're

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Speaker 1: not having sex. You know, there were times we would

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Speaker 1: just fall asleephold hands, you know, like imagine the connection

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Speaker 1: you created doing that, um, and so it's powerful. It's

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Speaker 1: not easy, especially when you're living together and spending so

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Speaker 1: much time together. But you know, if you understand the

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Speaker 1: purpose of why you're doing it, then uh, and you

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Speaker 1: focus on that in goal, then it actually becomes really

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Speaker 1: really really powerful force in your relationship. How long How

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Speaker 1: long was that time frame you guys? Oh? Man, Um,

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Speaker 1: we weren't even together that long, so it was let's see,

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Speaker 1: met in June. So I would probably say like a

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Speaker 1: total of like four or five months, okay, and then

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Speaker 1: that's yeah, that's a lie. And you all were together

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Speaker 1: a lot, so yes, we were always together. But then

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Speaker 1: y'all did break up and get back together, right. That

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Speaker 1: was kind of like we did at a couple of times, like, um,

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Speaker 1: you know sometimes when I'm upset, like I'm a quitter,

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Speaker 1: I'd be like, just get out, I'm done, you know,

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Speaker 1: like check block you, you know, like in my anger,

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Speaker 1: I don't want to fight, I just want to be done. Um.

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Speaker 1: But when that statement was put out, that was kind

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Speaker 1: of like the starting point of me being like I'm

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Speaker 1: exiting this relationship, you know. And then I had an

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Speaker 1: ultimatum that I gave him after that statement was put out,

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Speaker 1: and I said, you know, there's only one thing you

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Speaker 1: can do for us to get back together, and he said,

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Speaker 1: whatever I gotta do, I'll do it. He decided to

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Speaker 1: do that, and then when it came down to the time,

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Speaker 1: he was sup post that he didn't do it, and

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Speaker 1: so that is when I was literally like, okay, what

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Speaker 1: was Yeah? What was it? I just don't want to

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Speaker 1: say um because again it will start a lot of

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Speaker 1: back and forth, you know, But UM, I think my

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Speaker 1: statement that was put out was kind of clear that

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Speaker 1: we were having some troubles in some areas and our

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Speaker 1: lifestyles just were not the same. And so it was like,

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Speaker 1: you know, I need to change this area of your

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Speaker 1: lifestyle and if not, then I can't move forward with this.

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Speaker 1: So um, you know, decisions have to be made. And

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Speaker 1: I was able to walk away with in peace. So

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Speaker 1: you don't think this is another instance where maybe I'll

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Speaker 1: break up and get back together because he did say

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Speaker 1: he loves you. Oh, I on pent have no desire

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Speaker 1: to ever revisit the situation with Lamordom. Right, what if

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Speaker 1: how do you explain and normally reached out our show

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Speaker 1: off at the tip of the day, so as somebody

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Speaker 1: who has just been through this, right, how the tip

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Speaker 1: of the day for today, we want you to give

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Speaker 1: our listeners, is how do you know when it's time

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Speaker 1: to walk away from something when you've given it your

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Speaker 1: all and you're like, I can't do anymore, when you

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Speaker 1: just have no peace? And I think a good indication

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Speaker 1: of not having peace is like when you're just not

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Speaker 1: acting like yourself. You know, and we all know what

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Speaker 1: that looks like. You like, I can't leave. I just

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Speaker 1: did that. I can't. I just said that, you know,

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Speaker 1: like when you're just not yourself, you know, which means

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Speaker 1: you have no peace and so um in anything. So

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Speaker 1: that is a good and that could be early on.

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Speaker 1: You know, every woman has a threshold. Everyone's time frame

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Speaker 1: is different, you know the things I put up with.

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Speaker 1: I know women that could have went through that for years,

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Speaker 1: other women that rely on the first side of that,

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Speaker 1: you know. So everyone's threshold is different. You have to

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Speaker 1: understand where your worthy is. But the moment I knew

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Speaker 1: like I can no longer go on with this happening

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Speaker 1: is when I knew it's time to find an exit rout.

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Speaker 1: I agree with you on that because there is um

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Speaker 1: for myself too. I also feel like when I'm not

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Speaker 1: acting like myself and I'm arguing, when I'm like depressed

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Speaker 1: more than normal. When I'm more sad than happy, I'm like,

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Speaker 1: this is not me, Like, this is not like person.

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Speaker 1: When I'm not like, you know, fulfilling my obligations and

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Speaker 1: things that I have to do, because I'm more concerned

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Speaker 1: about that person than I am about my responsibilities. I'm

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Speaker 1: this isn't a good situation for me. And it was

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Speaker 1: kind of Um. You know, I can't say how he

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Speaker 1: felt because I haven't spoken with him, and the interviews

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Speaker 1: and things he's done, I haven't listened. But for for me,

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Speaker 1: I just knew. You know, I tell people this all

359
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Speaker 1: the time. You have to ask yourself a question in

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Speaker 1: the relationship, if the current situation doesn't change, will you

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Speaker 1: be happy? Because a lot of times we stay in

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Speaker 1: things in hopes of, you know, this may it better.

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Speaker 1: I hope this works, if you know, And so the

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Speaker 1: reality is it may not. You know, it may remain

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Speaker 1: that exact situation. So the answer is no, I won't

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Speaker 1: be happy. Then you're forced to make a decision, you know,

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Speaker 1: and um Lamar knows more than anyone our truths of

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Speaker 1: what happened, why we split. Um, that's why I said,

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Speaker 1: I'm allowing him to say whatever narrative he wants because

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Speaker 1: I do know men have egos, you know. Um, and

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Speaker 1: he's lamar old him. You know, he's a legend. He

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Speaker 1: has to remain he has to look good. You know,

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Speaker 1: his image cannot be tainted by a woman. How how

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Speaker 1: dare I you know? So? Um, whatever he needs to

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Speaker 1: say that makes him, you know, support that image. I

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Speaker 1: rock with it. Do you still love him? Because he

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Speaker 1: said he still loves you? Do you still love him? Oh? Yeah,

378
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Speaker 1: I do. I love him a lot. He was my friend,

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Speaker 1: you know. Um. There are times I'm just concerned for

380
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Speaker 1: my friend, you know, I do. People send me stuff

381
00:20:33,000 --> 00:20:37,280
Speaker 1: all the time. Um, there's still been some form of

382
00:20:37,359 --> 00:20:41,800
Speaker 1: contact through people, and as a friend. My heart goes

383
00:20:41,840 --> 00:20:46,359
Speaker 1: out to him sometimes because no man who says I

384
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Speaker 1: love you, who proposed, who wanted to get married, who

385
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Speaker 1: you saw the interview, I'm sure he spoke very well

386
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Speaker 1: of me, who really felt thought that way, is happy

387
00:20:57,840 --> 00:21:01,240
Speaker 1: that the situation has ended. You know, there could have

388
00:21:01,280 --> 00:21:04,560
Speaker 1: been some grief, some sorrow, some something. And because I

389
00:21:04,600 --> 00:21:09,080
Speaker 1: don't see him going through any of that at any point, Um,

390
00:21:09,119 --> 00:21:11,639
Speaker 1: my heart goes out because I'm like, wow, you can't

391
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Speaker 1: really feel you know, Um, I went for about three

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Speaker 1: weeks I grieve. I'm being honest, you know, I put

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Speaker 1: up a post like the first week, I'm not getting

394
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Speaker 1: out of bed. Somebody needs to come get my daughter,

395
00:21:23,800 --> 00:21:28,760
Speaker 1: you know, because I'm a wreck. I'm a mess, you know. UM,

396
00:21:28,800 --> 00:21:31,919
Speaker 1: heavy with my therapist, you know, very honest and transparent

397
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Speaker 1: with my friends, just going through the motions in my mind.

398
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Speaker 1: I mean, I went through a heavy grieving process where

399
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Speaker 1: like I'm not going anywhere. I don't even want to

400
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Speaker 1: get up and look cute because it's gonna force me

401
00:21:41,760 --> 00:21:45,600
Speaker 1: to just get busy and you know, create a false reality.

402
00:21:45,680 --> 00:21:47,800
Speaker 1: So that first three weeks, and this was three weeks

403
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Speaker 1: before the world found out right we had been broken up.

404
00:21:51,880 --> 00:21:56,159
Speaker 1: People found out when he made that well when it

405
00:21:56,240 --> 00:22:00,080
Speaker 1: was on his page about the passwords, um. And but

406
00:22:00,119 --> 00:22:02,399
Speaker 1: I was like, by then, I was like, I'm over it,

407
00:22:02,560 --> 00:22:05,400
Speaker 1: Like I'm not even grieving anymore, you know. So a

408
00:22:05,400 --> 00:22:07,320
Speaker 1: good timing for me, because that could have hit me

409
00:22:07,640 --> 00:22:09,560
Speaker 1: like a can of bricks, you know. And I was

410
00:22:09,640 --> 00:22:12,040
Speaker 1: just like, by y'all, you know, if you ain't got

411
00:22:12,040 --> 00:22:16,640
Speaker 1: no pass words by now, you know. Um. But I truly,

412
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Speaker 1: with my friends and family, grieved, you know, the loss

413
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Speaker 1: of my friend, the loss of the interaction him and

414
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Speaker 1: I had. You know, he was staying in my house.

415
00:22:26,080 --> 00:22:28,159
Speaker 1: You know, my daughter was attached to him. It was

416
00:22:28,200 --> 00:22:31,080
Speaker 1: a holidays you know, we were just together on Thanksgiving,

417
00:22:31,200 --> 00:22:35,400
Speaker 1: you know. So, Um, once I got through that process,

418
00:22:35,440 --> 00:22:37,919
Speaker 1: it was just like, you know, yes I do. I

419
00:22:37,960 --> 00:22:40,560
Speaker 1: am concerned for my friend at times. Um, if I

420
00:22:40,600 --> 00:22:43,800
Speaker 1: hear anything positive, I'm happy for my friend. The love

421
00:22:43,800 --> 00:22:46,960
Speaker 1: will probably be there forever. You know. I literally would

422
00:22:46,960 --> 00:22:49,359
Speaker 1: love to look up and see Lamar one day and

423
00:22:49,400 --> 00:22:51,800
Speaker 1: be like, Wow, look how well he's doing, you know,

424
00:22:51,920 --> 00:22:54,919
Speaker 1: and that's it. We would be a lesson that you

425
00:22:54,920 --> 00:22:56,960
Speaker 1: can say that you learned from your experience in this

426
00:22:57,040 --> 00:22:59,280
Speaker 1: relationship that you would take with you moving forward to

427
00:22:59,400 --> 00:23:03,439
Speaker 1: a new relations ship. Um, you know, you just I

428
00:23:03,440 --> 00:23:08,240
Speaker 1: would say, when someone appears to be unhealthy, you just

429
00:23:08,320 --> 00:23:12,560
Speaker 1: have to allow them to go get healthy, you know, like,

430
00:23:12,840 --> 00:23:17,320
Speaker 1: don't try don't try to Yeah. And and there were

431
00:23:17,359 --> 00:23:21,320
Speaker 1: times where I think people think I tried to fix him.

432
00:23:21,359 --> 00:23:24,080
Speaker 1: What I tried to do? I would ask Lamar, what

433
00:23:24,240 --> 00:23:26,200
Speaker 1: is it that you want to do? And he would

434
00:23:26,240 --> 00:23:28,080
Speaker 1: tell me, and I said, okay, well let me support

435
00:23:28,119 --> 00:23:30,160
Speaker 1: you in that. You know, even if it was getting

436
00:23:30,160 --> 00:23:32,000
Speaker 1: back into shape. He told me all the time, I

437
00:23:32,040 --> 00:23:34,680
Speaker 1: want to play basketball again. Okay, well, let's do it.

438
00:23:34,760 --> 00:23:37,680
Speaker 1: Let's go to the gym. You know every morning. There

439
00:23:37,680 --> 00:23:40,080
Speaker 1: were times I would wake him up at five, we

440
00:23:40,200 --> 00:23:43,960
Speaker 1: go to lifetime. Um, I would make him do two

441
00:23:44,359 --> 00:23:47,920
Speaker 1: fifty makes, not shots makes. I would count all the makes.

442
00:23:47,920 --> 00:23:50,600
Speaker 1: I would count all the miss mrs. I would calculate

443
00:23:50,640 --> 00:23:52,480
Speaker 1: his percentages. We would run a mile, we would go

444
00:23:52,560 --> 00:23:55,080
Speaker 1: lift later. Because it's what you told me you wanted

445
00:23:55,119 --> 00:23:58,160
Speaker 1: to do, you know. Um. And then if that changed, Okay,

446
00:23:58,200 --> 00:23:59,360
Speaker 1: I don't want to do this, ef you want let's

447
00:23:59,359 --> 00:24:02,080
Speaker 1: do this. Okay. I'm just gonna support you and whatever

448
00:24:02,119 --> 00:24:05,000
Speaker 1: it is you want to do. You know. That's that's healthy,

449
00:24:05,280 --> 00:24:08,639
Speaker 1: right because obviously with him not being in the NBA,

450
00:24:08,880 --> 00:24:11,119
Speaker 1: he's figuring his life out like a lot of guys.

451
00:24:11,160 --> 00:24:13,440
Speaker 1: Do what is it that you want to do moving forward?

452
00:24:13,440 --> 00:24:15,359
Speaker 1: What is going to be the thing that makes you money?

453
00:24:15,800 --> 00:24:17,480
Speaker 1: You know? Um, let's figure that out and let me

454
00:24:17,480 --> 00:24:19,439
Speaker 1: support you in that as long as it makes sense,

455
00:24:19,520 --> 00:24:21,679
Speaker 1: you know, on both ends of the spectrum. Um, what

456
00:24:21,760 --> 00:24:23,239
Speaker 1: kind of dad do you want to be? Let me

457
00:24:23,280 --> 00:24:26,560
Speaker 1: help you figure that out. So it wasn't just like Lamar,

458
00:24:26,720 --> 00:24:29,359
Speaker 1: this is broken. You gotta you know, like I wanted

459
00:24:29,440 --> 00:24:33,080
Speaker 1: him to be him, but the unhealthy areas, when I

460
00:24:33,119 --> 00:24:36,479
Speaker 1: saw what those were, I should have made a conscious

461
00:24:36,520 --> 00:24:39,719
Speaker 1: decision then to say, this probably isn't gonna work for me,

462
00:24:40,480 --> 00:24:44,840
Speaker 1: you know, because I have trauma because of this. You know,

463
00:24:44,920 --> 00:24:47,679
Speaker 1: I grew up in that environment. It doesn't allow me

464
00:24:47,720 --> 00:24:50,760
Speaker 1: to be myself when I see you doing certain things

465
00:24:51,520 --> 00:24:54,880
Speaker 1: and I don't know if you're gonna stop, So I hope,

466
00:24:54,920 --> 00:24:58,560
Speaker 1: I hope you will. I pray you will. You know, um,

467
00:24:58,600 --> 00:25:01,320
Speaker 1: I think you will. But all of that is not

468
00:25:01,520 --> 00:25:04,160
Speaker 1: you did, you know, so it should have been Hey,

469
00:25:04,400 --> 00:25:08,439
Speaker 1: until this happens, we can revisit the situation. The problem

470
00:25:08,560 --> 00:25:12,000
Speaker 1: was when I got out with Lamar, I let him know.

471
00:25:12,240 --> 00:25:15,719
Speaker 1: You know, I have a problem with drugs period. You know.

472
00:25:15,760 --> 00:25:17,480
Speaker 1: I don't like to operate around I like to be

473
00:25:17,520 --> 00:25:19,840
Speaker 1: around it. I want my kids around it. And that

474
00:25:19,880 --> 00:25:23,160
Speaker 1: includes weed and you because you did have your own

475
00:25:23,200 --> 00:25:27,359
Speaker 1: issues that you went through and you are yes. And

476
00:25:27,520 --> 00:25:30,480
Speaker 1: even though I didn't be myself morphine, you know, it

477
00:25:30,560 --> 00:25:32,119
Speaker 1: was still in my system and it was something I

478
00:25:32,160 --> 00:25:35,720
Speaker 1: became very dependent on and um and then growing up

479
00:25:35,760 --> 00:25:39,359
Speaker 1: in a you know, abusive environment. But because of that,

480
00:25:40,200 --> 00:25:44,320
Speaker 1: I expressed to him that's a problem for me, you know. Um,

481
00:25:44,359 --> 00:25:46,679
Speaker 1: so we stopped. You know. So when you have a

482
00:25:46,720 --> 00:25:50,639
Speaker 1: man that's just so willing to do or not do

483
00:25:50,800 --> 00:25:52,960
Speaker 1: things to make the relationship work, you kind of a

484
00:25:53,040 --> 00:25:57,600
Speaker 1: little bit more patient. But the truth is, men can't

485
00:25:57,640 --> 00:26:01,040
Speaker 1: do things to make you happy. They have to make

486
00:26:01,080 --> 00:26:04,439
Speaker 1: things because it makes them happen, because they're ready to

487
00:26:04,560 --> 00:26:08,280
Speaker 1: do it, you know. And that can be confusing because

488
00:26:08,280 --> 00:26:11,200
Speaker 1: it kind of appears the same because if you stop smoking,

489
00:26:11,200 --> 00:26:15,399
Speaker 1: you stop smoking, you know. But I really needed to revisit, well,

490
00:26:15,440 --> 00:26:17,720
Speaker 1: I needed him to visit with a therapist because I

491
00:26:17,720 --> 00:26:19,880
Speaker 1: didn't want to be the therapist, like get into therapy

492
00:26:19,920 --> 00:26:23,800
Speaker 1: and figure out why you you know, have to do

493
00:26:23,880 --> 00:26:27,680
Speaker 1: this or do the desire or unable to stop. And

494
00:26:28,840 --> 00:26:31,280
Speaker 1: um that that just didn't that didn't that didn't have

495
00:26:31,440 --> 00:26:38,919
Speaker 1: that wasn't the end results. So the drugs didn't stop. Um,

496
00:26:38,960 --> 00:26:40,800
Speaker 1: that's what we're getting from this. It was that he

497
00:26:40,880 --> 00:26:43,879
Speaker 1: still was using. You know, people say things too, like

498
00:26:43,920 --> 00:26:46,800
Speaker 1: we've seen the Drink Champs interview and people felt like,

499
00:26:46,880 --> 00:26:50,280
Speaker 1: you know, he was going through something. And even again,

500
00:26:50,359 --> 00:26:51,920
Speaker 1: like I said, I interviewed him the other day in

501
00:26:51,960 --> 00:26:55,399
Speaker 1: the comments, was like, is he hi now? So is

502
00:26:55,440 --> 00:26:57,919
Speaker 1: that you know? Is that still an issue you believe?

503
00:26:58,520 --> 00:27:00,359
Speaker 1: I don't know what Lamar is doing. I have not

504
00:27:00,400 --> 00:27:03,600
Speaker 1: spoken to him, so I cannot speak on what he's

505
00:27:03,680 --> 00:27:05,760
Speaker 1: he's dealing with right now. Current if it calls you,

506
00:27:06,320 --> 00:27:08,720
Speaker 1: if he calls you with you answer, do you believe

507
00:27:08,760 --> 00:27:11,040
Speaker 1: that he doesn't call me? Okay, so he has been

508
00:27:11,080 --> 00:27:15,240
Speaker 1: calling you. Just like I said, I am going to

509
00:27:15,480 --> 00:27:20,119
Speaker 1: allow his narrative to be his narratives, right because despite

510
00:27:20,119 --> 00:27:22,600
Speaker 1: the rumors of what people want to believe about me,

511
00:27:22,840 --> 00:27:25,040
Speaker 1: you know, my truth is my truth. And you know,

512
00:27:25,119 --> 00:27:27,119
Speaker 1: when you're like innocent, like you don't really have to.

513
00:27:27,160 --> 00:27:28,800
Speaker 1: I mean, I'm not in court, you know, so I

514
00:27:28,840 --> 00:27:31,960
Speaker 1: don't feel the need to defend myself to strangers. I

515
00:27:32,119 --> 00:27:37,360
Speaker 1: am talking and stuff. So my friends and family they know,

516
00:27:37,560 --> 00:27:41,840
Speaker 1: like everyone knows that that matters, I'll say. And I

517
00:27:41,880 --> 00:27:45,000
Speaker 1: do also feel like, you know, I don't know if

518
00:27:45,000 --> 00:27:49,080
Speaker 1: this was Lamar's character before to be so outspoken with

519
00:27:49,160 --> 00:27:52,679
Speaker 1: these type of things, you know, um, and so to me,

520
00:27:52,720 --> 00:27:54,760
Speaker 1: it just seems like you just want to be heard,

521
00:27:56,119 --> 00:27:58,600
Speaker 1: and so go ahead and tell whatever story you gotta

522
00:27:58,640 --> 00:28:01,000
Speaker 1: tell to be heard. You know, I'm just not going

523
00:28:01,040 --> 00:28:02,919
Speaker 1: to combat. And I also don't want to say anything

524
00:28:02,920 --> 00:28:06,680
Speaker 1: negatively about him to even start that whole back and forth.

525
00:28:06,840 --> 00:28:09,760
Speaker 1: You know, what did you learn about yourself from all

526
00:28:09,800 --> 00:28:12,160
Speaker 1: this and what you went moving forward in a partner?

527
00:28:12,800 --> 00:28:14,880
Speaker 1: It's funny did you say that because the shape room

528
00:28:14,920 --> 00:28:18,400
Speaker 1: had like posted like name the qualities you wanted a man?

529
00:28:19,000 --> 00:28:20,880
Speaker 1: And you know, I was commented on the shape room

530
00:28:20,880 --> 00:28:22,280
Speaker 1: way before I ever was on the shape room. So

531
00:28:22,320 --> 00:28:25,919
Speaker 1: I was like, okay, everybody heard of me. Look, you

532
00:28:25,920 --> 00:28:32,639
Speaker 1: can't say anything more. I say, Um, I put healthy, sober,

533
00:28:35,000 --> 00:28:38,480
Speaker 1: okay for the room, right and never ly And I

534
00:28:38,520 --> 00:28:42,160
Speaker 1: was but that's what I learned, you know, Like that's

535
00:28:42,160 --> 00:28:44,760
Speaker 1: what I learned. No, I didn't have anything to a finances.

536
00:28:45,040 --> 00:28:47,920
Speaker 1: Did I know you got the broke? I did not.

537
00:28:48,600 --> 00:28:55,080
Speaker 1: Didn't you say something about him being broke? See, I

538
00:28:55,120 --> 00:28:56,680
Speaker 1: don't know. I read it on one of the bugs

539
00:28:56,680 --> 00:28:59,320
Speaker 1: that you said he was broke. Finding where I said

540
00:28:59,360 --> 00:29:08,960
Speaker 1: that man was okay, find it and people. But when

541
00:29:08,960 --> 00:29:12,240
Speaker 1: people say that, I'm like, show me, show me where

542
00:29:12,280 --> 00:29:14,960
Speaker 1: I said that. You know, um, I think anything I

543
00:29:15,080 --> 00:29:18,239
Speaker 1: say though, they think it's about Lamar you know, like

544
00:29:18,720 --> 00:29:20,960
Speaker 1: I've been posting quote way before hit me like it's

545
00:29:21,000 --> 00:29:25,640
Speaker 1: just it's who I am. But um so healthy, sober, Yes,

546
00:29:25,760 --> 00:29:28,840
Speaker 1: I can remember the other two things that I um

547
00:29:28,840 --> 00:29:32,880
Speaker 1: but I wrote. But and healthy for me, I'm an athlete.

548
00:29:33,120 --> 00:29:35,320
Speaker 1: I want to work out, you know, I like to

549
00:29:35,320 --> 00:29:39,120
Speaker 1: play basketball. It's what I do, you know, So I

550
00:29:39,240 --> 00:29:41,200
Speaker 1: need that in the park. That's what I need. You

551
00:29:41,240 --> 00:29:43,360
Speaker 1: know if if I'm getting them going to the gym

552
00:29:43,400 --> 00:29:46,400
Speaker 1: and you're not that bothers me, you know, like I

553
00:29:46,440 --> 00:29:47,840
Speaker 1: need us to be on the same page with that.

554
00:29:47,840 --> 00:29:50,200
Speaker 1: That's kind of what I mean. Like healthy, you know,

555
00:29:50,440 --> 00:29:52,720
Speaker 1: like care about your health, um, care about what you

556
00:29:52,720 --> 00:29:56,440
Speaker 1: put in your body. Yeah, and all of that because

557
00:29:56,880 --> 00:29:59,320
Speaker 1: you know, I don't want to be eating you know, spinage,

558
00:29:59,480 --> 00:30:01,960
Speaker 1: rice and vegetables, and it's like I have to fire

559
00:30:02,000 --> 00:30:05,400
Speaker 1: you chicken, you know like that. It's like it's just

560
00:30:06,240 --> 00:30:10,880
Speaker 1: you know, and then I'm at the hospital with you

561
00:30:10,960 --> 00:30:14,840
Speaker 1: because you are your arteries are clogged or now you

562
00:30:14,920 --> 00:30:17,400
Speaker 1: have you know, like because there's side effects to everything,

563
00:30:17,480 --> 00:30:20,080
Speaker 1: you know as you get older. So um, just someone

564
00:30:20,120 --> 00:30:23,640
Speaker 1: that already understands, you know, a healthy body, a healthy mind,

565
00:30:23,800 --> 00:30:27,280
Speaker 1: you know, it's all equates to self love sober like

566
00:30:27,480 --> 00:30:31,120
Speaker 1: people being high and just needing to be high like

567
00:30:31,280 --> 00:30:34,920
Speaker 1: that just doesn't work for me, you know, because I

568
00:30:34,960 --> 00:30:38,320
Speaker 1: don't get high. So if you're getting high, well then

569
00:30:38,360 --> 00:30:41,600
Speaker 1: what am I doing? But what about a recreation on marijuana?

570
00:30:41,800 --> 00:30:43,840
Speaker 1: Like every now and then somebody smokes weed? Could you

571
00:30:43,920 --> 00:30:47,760
Speaker 1: do that or no? Yes, I've done that before. Um

572
00:30:47,800 --> 00:30:50,880
Speaker 1: And and I don't think everyone that smokes weed is

573
00:30:50,920 --> 00:30:56,240
Speaker 1: an addict, But an addict smoking something is a problem.

574
00:30:56,280 --> 00:31:00,120
Speaker 1: You know, most addicts should probably not do anything, you know.

575
00:31:00,440 --> 00:31:02,080
Speaker 1: Um And I learned that from my mom. You know,

576
00:31:02,200 --> 00:31:04,200
Speaker 1: as you know from the show, she struggled with addiction.

577
00:31:04,760 --> 00:31:08,040
Speaker 1: She won't drink, she won't do anything because everything triggers

578
00:31:08,520 --> 00:31:12,040
Speaker 1: the addicts brain to go back to. You know. It's

579
00:31:12,080 --> 00:31:14,000
Speaker 1: kind of like how they feel avoid how they deal

580
00:31:14,000 --> 00:31:19,080
Speaker 1: with trauma is getting high. So anything could be a trigger. So, um,

581
00:31:19,120 --> 00:31:22,280
Speaker 1: that's a problem. But people doing recreational I mean, I

582
00:31:22,320 --> 00:31:30,200
Speaker 1: smoke hooka. It's not a good girl. That's the healthiest thing,

583
00:31:30,520 --> 00:31:33,400
Speaker 1: you know. I drink wine, I drink liquor, you know,

584
00:31:33,600 --> 00:31:35,720
Speaker 1: but I don't overuse it. I don't over drink it

585
00:31:35,760 --> 00:31:38,400
Speaker 1: because I'm not an addict. So that's important to me

586
00:31:38,560 --> 00:31:41,320
Speaker 1: and a partner, you know, and being a good father,

587
00:31:41,920 --> 00:31:44,600
Speaker 1: you know, if you already have kids, Like how do

588
00:31:44,640 --> 00:31:46,680
Speaker 1: your kids feel about you? How do you interact with

589
00:31:46,680 --> 00:31:49,720
Speaker 1: your children? You know, are they going to be upset

590
00:31:49,760 --> 00:31:52,640
Speaker 1: with me because you're with me and they haven't seen

591
00:31:52,680 --> 00:31:55,840
Speaker 1: you? You You know, like these things matter, you know, Um

592
00:31:56,720 --> 00:31:59,240
Speaker 1: did you meet his kids plenty of time? Because daughter

593
00:31:59,320 --> 00:32:02,400
Speaker 1: was at the engagement party? Um, you know, Dessie and

594
00:32:02,440 --> 00:32:05,960
Speaker 1: I actually spent some time with each other, um l

595
00:32:06,080 --> 00:32:09,640
Speaker 1: J not as much and rightfully so, like I respect

596
00:32:09,640 --> 00:32:12,520
Speaker 1: their feelings position you know, who knows what all they

597
00:32:12,560 --> 00:32:15,200
Speaker 1: went through with their dad, you know and their mom.

598
00:32:15,240 --> 00:32:17,479
Speaker 1: So UM, I really just have to respect whatever their

599
00:32:17,520 --> 00:32:20,760
Speaker 1: position was. But um, in reality, you know, they just

600
00:32:20,840 --> 00:32:24,560
Speaker 1: want their dad, you know, like by themselves, and so

601
00:32:24,640 --> 00:32:27,480
Speaker 1: seeing him do anything outside of that is just challenging

602
00:32:27,520 --> 00:32:29,080
Speaker 1: for them. And I saw that with the time that

603
00:32:29,120 --> 00:32:32,680
Speaker 1: I spent with them. M but saping it. We appreciate

604
00:32:32,720 --> 00:32:35,520
Speaker 1: you for being so open and honest, and I can't

605
00:32:35,520 --> 00:32:39,120
Speaker 1: wait for you to say get me in trouble. Well,

606
00:32:39,200 --> 00:32:43,400
Speaker 1: you didn't say anything negative perfectly, like I just listen.

607
00:32:43,440 --> 00:32:45,960
Speaker 1: I will continue to say whatever he says. This let

608
00:32:45,960 --> 00:32:49,040
Speaker 1: it be the truth, y'all. Let him have it. You

609
00:32:49,120 --> 00:32:51,560
Speaker 1: gotta be sitting some wine and something's gonna happen, and

610
00:32:51,560 --> 00:32:56,600
Speaker 1: you're gonna be like, Okay, now, no, I have been tempted.

611
00:32:57,040 --> 00:32:58,920
Speaker 1: I have been tempted. But this is why it's important

612
00:32:58,960 --> 00:33:02,800
Speaker 1: to have good people around you, because they say, like, Okay,

613
00:33:02,880 --> 00:33:05,080
Speaker 1: we're gonna be the results of this. Is he even

614
00:33:05,080 --> 00:33:07,760
Speaker 1: a position to be honest? You know? Is he even

615
00:33:07,800 --> 00:33:10,560
Speaker 1: speaking for himself? You know, he has some people around

616
00:33:10,600 --> 00:33:13,880
Speaker 1: him right now. They are very vocal, you know, so, um,

617
00:33:14,000 --> 00:33:16,640
Speaker 1: is it even worth it? So? I think what I

618
00:33:16,840 --> 00:33:19,760
Speaker 1: portrayed on my page, it's really who I am. You know,

619
00:33:20,480 --> 00:33:23,280
Speaker 1: if you scroll down before Lamar, you'll see me doing

620
00:33:23,320 --> 00:33:27,440
Speaker 1: the same things literally, you know, exercise and playing basketball,

621
00:33:27,560 --> 00:33:32,760
Speaker 1: dressing up, being cute, motivating, empowering women, selingtee selling wage trainers.

622
00:33:32,800 --> 00:33:35,160
Speaker 1: It's just it's just what I've what I've done, and

623
00:33:35,240 --> 00:33:39,920
Speaker 1: so I'm still that person. Okay, well, well listen, we

624
00:33:40,000 --> 00:33:41,760
Speaker 1: already saw it, but I know people are gonna be

625
00:33:41,760 --> 00:33:44,720
Speaker 1: watching and weighing in when that episode airs. But I

626
00:33:44,760 --> 00:33:47,360
Speaker 1: did appreciate learning more about you as a person because

627
00:33:47,360 --> 00:33:50,800
Speaker 1: I know you were thrust into the spotlight just because

628
00:33:50,960 --> 00:33:52,640
Speaker 1: of who you were dating. But now we get to

629
00:33:52,680 --> 00:33:58,600
Speaker 1: see who you are as unexpectedly, I might add, unexpectantly.

630
00:33:58,640 --> 00:34:00,760
Speaker 1: I was like, oh my gosh, I didn't you tell

631
00:34:00,800 --> 00:34:03,320
Speaker 1: me this is what you were about to do. UM.

632
00:34:03,560 --> 00:34:05,160
Speaker 1: I could have been a little bit more prepared for

633
00:34:05,360 --> 00:34:08,120
Speaker 1: but it happened. It is what it is. But they

634
00:34:08,160 --> 00:34:10,120
Speaker 1: good for a business for you as a trainer and

635
00:34:10,200 --> 00:34:12,120
Speaker 1: like working with people. Was it at least good for

636
00:34:12,200 --> 00:34:16,320
Speaker 1: business in the beginning, No, because I was overwhelmed with

637
00:34:16,600 --> 00:34:19,359
Speaker 1: orders and I just was not like equipped. I didn't

638
00:34:19,360 --> 00:34:21,920
Speaker 1: have the team for it. Oh my god, it was

639
00:34:21,960 --> 00:34:24,600
Speaker 1: so unprepared. I was like that day he posted me,

640
00:34:24,640 --> 00:34:28,359
Speaker 1: I had like five orders. I was wasn't even with

641
00:34:28,520 --> 00:34:30,520
Speaker 1: my work stuff, but was in l a with him.

642
00:34:30,520 --> 00:34:32,799
Speaker 1: I'm like, we gotta hire somebody. I gotta, you know,

643
00:34:32,880 --> 00:34:35,640
Speaker 1: try to figure this out. But it actually taught me

644
00:34:35,920 --> 00:34:38,760
Speaker 1: how to be a better businesswoman, how to UM operate

645
00:34:38,800 --> 00:34:41,920
Speaker 1: better in customer service, you know, and also told me like, wow,

646
00:34:41,920 --> 00:34:44,520
Speaker 1: I have some really good products, you know, like people,

647
00:34:44,560 --> 00:34:47,880
Speaker 1: there was a need for what I'm selling UM. And

648
00:34:47,920 --> 00:34:50,560
Speaker 1: then there was a time when Lamar really supported what

649
00:34:50,600 --> 00:34:54,760
Speaker 1: I did. It really pushed my brand and my my products. So, Um,

650
00:34:54,800 --> 00:34:58,160
Speaker 1: I think people really can't remember that Lamar Oldom but

651
00:34:58,760 --> 00:35:01,080
Speaker 1: um that helped because it was like it was the

652
00:35:01,360 --> 00:35:03,759
Speaker 1: person I was with was very supportive of what I

653
00:35:03,800 --> 00:35:05,880
Speaker 1: had going on. Yeah, I'm a big kan if I

654
00:35:06,040 --> 00:35:08,000
Speaker 1: was looking at the bright side of things. At least

655
00:35:08,000 --> 00:35:09,759
Speaker 1: this came out of it. At least I learned this.

656
00:35:09,880 --> 00:35:13,239
Speaker 1: At least I know more about myself. At least being

657
00:35:13,320 --> 00:35:17,440
Speaker 1: with him got me on this show on the own network,

658
00:35:17,680 --> 00:35:20,640
Speaker 1: you know, to talk about my life. The concept of

659
00:35:20,640 --> 00:35:23,759
Speaker 1: the entire show was amazing, you know, to highlight the

660
00:35:23,800 --> 00:35:26,319
Speaker 1: phenomenal women in these men's lives. I mean, I just

661
00:35:26,440 --> 00:35:29,160
Speaker 1: love that to have been chosen to be one that

662
00:35:29,400 --> 00:35:32,480
Speaker 1: probably wouldn't have happened this stage in my life if

663
00:35:32,480 --> 00:35:36,720
Speaker 1: it wasn't for Lamar. You know. Um even there's something

664
00:35:36,760 --> 00:35:39,000
Speaker 1: coming out really soon and they're gonna really be able

665
00:35:39,040 --> 00:35:42,279
Speaker 1: to visually see how Lamar and I acted, um interactive

666
00:35:42,280 --> 00:35:45,920
Speaker 1: with each other. So stay tuned for that, and you

667
00:35:45,960 --> 00:35:51,080
Speaker 1: can't come back real life videos um so UM that's

668
00:35:51,120 --> 00:35:55,560
Speaker 1: exciting and um like really really soon. So by the

669
00:35:55,600 --> 00:35:59,400
Speaker 1: time this show airs on your podcast days later, you

670
00:35:59,400 --> 00:36:02,440
Speaker 1: will probably seeing the war and I interacting um in

671
00:36:02,440 --> 00:36:06,719
Speaker 1: our relationship, And is it hard for you to watch that? Well,

672
00:36:06,760 --> 00:36:11,160
Speaker 1: I haven't seen it yet, but of course it will be,

673
00:36:11,320 --> 00:36:14,160
Speaker 1: you know, because I just have to be honest, you know,

674
00:36:14,239 --> 00:36:17,240
Speaker 1: that was my man. I loved him, you know. Um,

675
00:36:17,320 --> 00:36:19,359
Speaker 1: I thought we were going to be together forever. You know,

676
00:36:19,400 --> 00:36:22,200
Speaker 1: I thought I was marrying him in November, you know,

677
00:36:22,440 --> 00:36:25,640
Speaker 1: So for that to be done, I would be inhuman

678
00:36:25,680 --> 00:36:29,799
Speaker 1: to say, it's not hard, you know, Um, but that

679
00:36:29,880 --> 00:36:32,120
Speaker 1: was a good season in my life, you know, like

680
00:36:32,239 --> 00:36:35,040
Speaker 1: the whole relationship was not bad. You know. Because it

681
00:36:35,239 --> 00:36:37,200
Speaker 1: ended doesn't mean that it was just a horrible time

682
00:36:37,200 --> 00:36:39,240
Speaker 1: in my life. It was a great time in my life.

683
00:36:39,480 --> 00:36:41,919
Speaker 1: Him and I had so much fun together. I've learned

684
00:36:42,000 --> 00:36:44,200
Speaker 1: so much because of him. I was able to have

685
00:36:44,239 --> 00:36:46,759
Speaker 1: so many different experiences that I would not have had

686
00:36:46,800 --> 00:36:49,600
Speaker 1: if it wasn't for the bar and our relationship, you know.

687
00:36:49,920 --> 00:36:53,440
Speaker 1: And I learned a different level of compassion and empathy,

688
00:36:53,560 --> 00:36:56,359
Speaker 1: you know, dealing with a man like that. So, um,

689
00:36:56,400 --> 00:37:00,800
Speaker 1: moving into the next relationship, I learned for my mistakes,

690
00:37:00,840 --> 00:37:02,880
Speaker 1: I know how to be better, you know. I know

691
00:37:02,960 --> 00:37:05,440
Speaker 1: the things that I did really well. So it's not

692
00:37:05,520 --> 00:37:07,520
Speaker 1: all the lost cause, but you know, it can be

693
00:37:07,520 --> 00:37:09,360
Speaker 1: tough to watch because I'm gonna be like, oh, I

694
00:37:09,400 --> 00:37:12,760
Speaker 1: remember that moment, and that was a really good because

695
00:37:12,800 --> 00:37:15,120
Speaker 1: you were you too are filming a reality show, so

696
00:37:15,200 --> 00:37:21,640
Speaker 1: that's still coming out. It is still coming out perfect timing, right,

697
00:37:23,239 --> 00:37:25,239
Speaker 1: And so all of these shows are kind of like,

698
00:37:25,400 --> 00:37:28,719
Speaker 1: these are my responses. I'll let you guys decide. Maybe

699
00:37:28,760 --> 00:37:31,240
Speaker 1: this will be a big story line Like the Kardashians.

700
00:37:31,280 --> 00:37:33,440
Speaker 1: I feel like he learned something from them when he

701
00:37:33,520 --> 00:37:37,080
Speaker 1: was over there. I'm sure no, he did learn a lot. Um.

702
00:37:37,120 --> 00:37:40,160
Speaker 1: You know, I don't really know what his space he's in. Um,

703
00:37:40,200 --> 00:37:43,360
Speaker 1: just hearing the little things that I hear. I hope

704
00:37:43,440 --> 00:37:46,279
Speaker 1: it moves to a space of just you know, an

705
00:37:46,320 --> 00:37:48,640
Speaker 1: open heart and open mind so that he can just

706
00:37:48,680 --> 00:37:50,520
Speaker 1: be a little bit more at peace with the situation.

707
00:37:51,280 --> 00:37:54,680
Speaker 1: But either way, it will allow these same fans to

708
00:37:54,920 --> 00:37:59,000
Speaker 1: see for themselves what was going over you know, how

709
00:37:59,040 --> 00:38:01,040
Speaker 1: were they really interact too with each other? You know?

710
00:38:01,640 --> 00:38:04,360
Speaker 1: Or she just spending his money or you know what,

711
00:38:04,360 --> 00:38:07,600
Speaker 1: what was really happening? You know? Um? And when I

712
00:38:07,680 --> 00:38:10,359
Speaker 1: hear the whole gold gold digger thing, it really makes

713
00:38:10,400 --> 00:38:13,600
Speaker 1: me laugh. He was with you because you're like, I'm hello,

714
00:38:15,200 --> 00:38:18,960
Speaker 1: his belly Andry. I said, you called them broke. You

715
00:38:18,960 --> 00:38:21,239
Speaker 1: you said that he was running low on cash. I

716
00:38:21,280 --> 00:38:23,839
Speaker 1: was trying to find until he said something like that. Right,

717
00:38:24,200 --> 00:38:26,319
Speaker 1: I see like ten articles. I didn't click on it.

718
00:38:27,080 --> 00:38:29,640
Speaker 1: So I'm gonna tell you what I did. Look, I'm

719
00:38:29,640 --> 00:38:32,479
Speaker 1: going to tell you what people are referencing. Okay, there

720
00:38:32,560 --> 00:38:35,680
Speaker 1: was a Tyler Perry quote that I reposted. That's it.

721
00:38:36,640 --> 00:38:38,759
Speaker 1: Before you get married. You have to learn people in

722
00:38:38,800 --> 00:38:43,200
Speaker 1: all four stages, when they're happy, angry, sad, and so

723
00:38:43,560 --> 00:38:46,719
Speaker 1: remember I reposted that and then I added to it,

724
00:38:47,160 --> 00:38:49,600
Speaker 1: you definitely learned who a person is when they're broke.

725
00:38:50,239 --> 00:38:52,520
Speaker 1: That is what I said. That sounds like shay girl,

726
00:38:53,880 --> 00:38:58,359
Speaker 1: but it was right after we broke up. It wasn't

727
00:38:58,360 --> 00:39:01,000
Speaker 1: a timeline, but but shade to you know, it could

728
00:39:01,000 --> 00:39:03,960
Speaker 1: be in shade to a family member, and you know,

729
00:39:04,040 --> 00:39:06,759
Speaker 1: it could have been shade to a co worker an

730
00:39:06,760 --> 00:39:12,399
Speaker 1: employer that I had. I think it's anything I say

731
00:39:12,520 --> 00:39:15,719
Speaker 1: right now, it's like you're talking about lamar, like I

732
00:39:15,719 --> 00:39:19,600
Speaker 1: have other things going on, you know. So that's why

733
00:39:19,600 --> 00:39:22,600
Speaker 1: I said, like I never said that, you know, um,

734
00:39:22,719 --> 00:39:25,680
Speaker 1: But but people will be able to see what's true

735
00:39:25,880 --> 00:39:29,000
Speaker 1: what's not just based one how he lives, how I live.

736
00:39:29,239 --> 00:39:32,799
Speaker 1: You know what the situation was, and I it's kind

737
00:39:32,800 --> 00:39:35,160
Speaker 1: of productive for me to say anything negatively about him.

738
00:39:35,160 --> 00:39:37,200
Speaker 1: I'm just gonna be honest. But your house looks nice

739
00:39:37,440 --> 00:39:41,719
Speaker 1: from right I am. I'm in Cleveland, Ohio. Remember how

740
00:39:41,920 --> 00:39:48,880
Speaker 1: stif we had in Cleveland. In Cleveland, I'm glad, Like

741
00:39:48,960 --> 00:39:54,960
Speaker 1: what's in Cleveland. I'm like Cleveland US now. But we

742
00:39:55,239 --> 00:39:57,960
Speaker 1: were in that downtown area where they have all the

743
00:39:58,080 --> 00:40:03,279
Speaker 1: nice rested rhyme said lows nice. Yeah, DJ step Loss

744
00:40:03,560 --> 00:40:09,200
Speaker 1: we got to step Yeah, that's my god. I've known

745
00:40:09,320 --> 00:40:12,719
Speaker 1: him since I was like five years old. Well, yeah,

746
00:40:12,719 --> 00:40:15,560
Speaker 1: that's who we were with Cleveland times. You'll go back

747
00:40:15,600 --> 00:40:20,040
Speaker 1: a little further. He's from Shaker, you know from the

748
00:40:20,520 --> 00:40:23,719
Speaker 1: documentary the show. I'm from Shaker as well. So he

749
00:40:23,800 --> 00:40:25,160
Speaker 1: was going to school there when I was going to

750
00:40:25,160 --> 00:40:27,200
Speaker 1: school there. Um. Yeah, he's a really good friend of

751
00:40:27,200 --> 00:40:29,600
Speaker 1: line and he'd be doing all that and he does

752
00:40:29,640 --> 00:40:32,120
Speaker 1: all that running and he does um he's I used

753
00:40:32,120 --> 00:40:34,319
Speaker 1: to be. I used to be part of his car

754
00:40:34,400 --> 00:40:37,120
Speaker 1: run with the Winner. Um. I used to be a

755
00:40:37,120 --> 00:40:39,200
Speaker 1: part of that group before I moved to Atlanta. Since

756
00:40:39,239 --> 00:40:41,160
Speaker 1: I've moved back in the whole COVID thing. I don't

757
00:40:41,160 --> 00:40:44,359
Speaker 1: even think they've had it going on. Um, but yeah,

758
00:40:44,360 --> 00:40:47,040
Speaker 1: he is vegan, so I love that he's thinking about

759
00:40:47,040 --> 00:40:50,200
Speaker 1: his health now. Uh. And he doesn't day as much

760
00:40:50,239 --> 00:40:52,759
Speaker 1: anymore either, so he's not drinking as much as he

761
00:40:52,840 --> 00:40:58,600
Speaker 1: used to. I'm assuming, um, but all the time, ever,

762
00:40:59,239 --> 00:41:03,279
Speaker 1: we shot at the shot after shot we've seen in

763
00:41:03,360 --> 00:41:05,560
Speaker 1: a documentary. I wanted to say that you've done a

764
00:41:05,640 --> 00:41:08,040
Speaker 1: little bit too. So, like when you was in there,

765
00:41:08,440 --> 00:41:10,319
Speaker 1: how did you make the time pass? I know you

766
00:41:10,520 --> 00:41:12,279
Speaker 1: you're able to keep your legs closed, but was the

767
00:41:12,320 --> 00:41:15,839
Speaker 1: girl's hitting on you in there? You know what? I

768
00:41:15,880 --> 00:41:18,879
Speaker 1: think I just had an aura where it was like,

769
00:41:19,320 --> 00:41:22,560
Speaker 1: don't try me, you know, like and but I was

770
00:41:22,640 --> 00:41:25,799
Speaker 1: also they nicknamed me like the librarian, like I was

771
00:41:26,480 --> 00:41:29,600
Speaker 1: busy reading, you know, like you couldn't do where I was.

772
00:41:29,680 --> 00:41:32,040
Speaker 1: The facility I was in, like, you couldn't exercise, you

773
00:41:32,040 --> 00:41:35,839
Speaker 1: can't go outside, there's literally nothing to do, and the

774
00:41:35,880 --> 00:41:39,520
Speaker 1: facility is overpopulated. So we were on something called red

775
00:41:39,600 --> 00:41:40,960
Speaker 1: zone was and you just can't come out of your

776
00:41:41,040 --> 00:41:44,399
Speaker 1: room because it's not enough inmates to staff ratio, right,

777
00:41:44,480 --> 00:41:48,880
Speaker 1: so you either will lose your mind or you'll find

778
00:41:48,880 --> 00:41:51,240
Speaker 1: something to do with your mind. And so my dad

779
00:41:51,440 --> 00:41:53,279
Speaker 1: was the one that actually was because he's done a

780
00:41:53,320 --> 00:41:55,600
Speaker 1: lot of time, was the one able to guide me

781
00:41:55,680 --> 00:41:58,640
Speaker 1: on what to do, you know, um, to not lose

782
00:41:58,680 --> 00:42:00,680
Speaker 1: your mind and to not become an at it because

783
00:42:00,960 --> 00:42:02,920
Speaker 1: a lot of people they just go to the mad car.

784
00:42:03,040 --> 00:42:05,800
Speaker 1: They get something to deal with their anxiety, the depression,

785
00:42:06,360 --> 00:42:08,319
Speaker 1: and they get out and they still are looking for

786
00:42:08,360 --> 00:42:12,759
Speaker 1: that medicine. So he taught me, stay away from the

787
00:42:12,800 --> 00:42:14,200
Speaker 1: mad car. I don't care what you do, don't give,

788
00:42:14,440 --> 00:42:17,239
Speaker 1: don't have them give you anything, and find something to

789
00:42:17,280 --> 00:42:21,280
Speaker 1: focus on. And so I focused on reading self help books,

790
00:42:21,320 --> 00:42:23,920
Speaker 1: books on finance. Business is actually where I came in

791
00:42:24,000 --> 00:42:26,440
Speaker 1: with the whole get up to part name and business.

792
00:42:26,560 --> 00:42:29,799
Speaker 1: When I was incarcerated and I read over fifty five

793
00:42:29,840 --> 00:42:33,919
Speaker 1: books in six months. I just yeah, and I wasn't

794
00:42:33,920 --> 00:42:35,839
Speaker 1: a reader before, you know, but it was like, okay,

795
00:42:35,840 --> 00:42:38,839
Speaker 1: I have to do something. I became addicted to send

796
00:42:38,880 --> 00:42:42,040
Speaker 1: me the next book, you know um. And so that

797
00:42:42,200 --> 00:42:44,359
Speaker 1: is what I did. That is how I passed time.

798
00:42:44,520 --> 00:42:46,719
Speaker 1: And then I started writing my own books. What about

799
00:42:46,719 --> 00:42:49,240
Speaker 1: a hundred pages of it, you know, my life story.

800
00:42:49,640 --> 00:42:51,880
Speaker 1: Why I went to jail, what was happening while it

801
00:42:51,960 --> 00:42:56,200
Speaker 1: was in jail, which I will finish very soon, amazing

802
00:42:56,239 --> 00:42:58,360
Speaker 1: story because it will go into detail like just what

803
00:42:58,480 --> 00:43:01,520
Speaker 1: happened while respect and my ex husband because he's such

804
00:43:01,520 --> 00:43:03,920
Speaker 1: a great man, he's a great dad, but just really

805
00:43:03,960 --> 00:43:06,600
Speaker 1: talking about me. So this will be like the extended

806
00:43:06,719 --> 00:43:09,239
Speaker 1: version of my episode on Behind the Man. So and

807
00:43:09,280 --> 00:43:12,120
Speaker 1: then you came and got an amazing shade too, which

808
00:43:12,200 --> 00:43:13,759
Speaker 1: you know what I'm about to say. Gigi went to

809
00:43:13,800 --> 00:43:16,160
Speaker 1: jail for a week and came bad of her girlfriend.

810
00:43:16,640 --> 00:43:24,920
Speaker 1: I didn't not so she still loves her do somebody

811
00:43:24,920 --> 00:43:29,000
Speaker 1: in there. I just let her like do things for

812
00:43:29,040 --> 00:43:32,719
Speaker 1: me with her mouth sometimes, I see. I was. I

813
00:43:32,760 --> 00:43:39,920
Speaker 1: couldn't get past like the nasty environment, like honestly was

814
00:43:40,000 --> 00:43:45,440
Speaker 1: like my nerves are you under the bus? I was.

815
00:43:46,239 --> 00:43:49,080
Speaker 1: I didn't even want to touch myself, like I couldn't

816
00:43:49,160 --> 00:43:52,520
Speaker 1: shave what you know. It was just like this ain't

817
00:43:52,520 --> 00:43:55,560
Speaker 1: the season for that, you know. Like and so then

818
00:43:55,560 --> 00:43:57,560
Speaker 1: it taught me like if I can go six months

819
00:43:58,040 --> 00:44:00,640
Speaker 1: without doing a thing, or I'm out here in these

820
00:44:00,719 --> 00:44:04,160
Speaker 1: days streets, you know, like they can't they can't brib

821
00:44:04,200 --> 00:44:06,920
Speaker 1: me to do anything, you know, So um, all of

822
00:44:06,920 --> 00:44:09,680
Speaker 1: it worked out for the best. It made me stronger.

823
00:44:09,719 --> 00:44:13,240
Speaker 1: I learned a lot. Um, that's another season of my life.

824
00:44:13,640 --> 00:44:15,800
Speaker 1: You know that I'm very transparent about people trying to

825
00:44:15,880 --> 00:44:18,240
Speaker 1: use it against me, and I'm like, I've been posted

826
00:44:18,280 --> 00:44:20,640
Speaker 1: my own mug shot way before you do who I was.

827
00:44:20,960 --> 00:44:23,680
Speaker 1: You know, like, I'm okay with this, but they literally

828
00:44:23,719 --> 00:44:26,040
Speaker 1: will be like you he should have never been with

829
00:44:26,080 --> 00:44:29,320
Speaker 1: somebody went to jail, you know. Like people are always

830
00:44:30,560 --> 00:44:33,680
Speaker 1: really just mind their business. The problem is their business

831
00:44:34,280 --> 00:44:37,000
Speaker 1: is so hurtful for them, Like they can't even tap

832
00:44:37,040 --> 00:44:40,319
Speaker 1: into their own business, you know, so they have to

833
00:44:40,360 --> 00:44:42,799
Speaker 1: be over here with me or them or whatever, and

834
00:44:42,880 --> 00:44:46,319
Speaker 1: like that's just the reflection of self, you know. Um,

835
00:44:46,360 --> 00:44:49,399
Speaker 1: when you're just ugly inside, you just have to find

836
00:44:49,400 --> 00:44:51,440
Speaker 1: something ugly about other people. And I've really learned that,

837
00:44:51,520 --> 00:44:53,440
Speaker 1: so I promise you I do not take a personal

838
00:44:53,440 --> 00:44:56,840
Speaker 1: when strangers face like you don't even know me, and

839
00:44:56,880 --> 00:45:00,080
Speaker 1: people just be assuming things and saying crazy, they know me,

840
00:45:00,239 --> 00:45:04,880
Speaker 1: they know everything. They were in our bed, they know

841
00:45:05,000 --> 00:45:07,720
Speaker 1: exactly what money was being spent, what we were doing,

842
00:45:08,320 --> 00:45:10,359
Speaker 1: you know. So I think it's just funny when they say,

843
00:45:10,440 --> 00:45:13,680
Speaker 1: like you did this with him, Like when you where,

844
00:45:14,560 --> 00:45:17,920
Speaker 1: you know. So that's why the show is gonna be

845
00:45:17,920 --> 00:45:21,960
Speaker 1: so dope because it's literally going to show what they know.

846
00:45:24,000 --> 00:45:26,560
Speaker 1: And I'm so real on there, Like there's days like

847
00:45:26,880 --> 00:45:29,520
Speaker 1: I'm not putting on makeup, I'm wearing my Nike hat,

848
00:45:30,080 --> 00:45:33,640
Speaker 1: you know, Like I'm really myself, you know, every day.

849
00:45:33,800 --> 00:45:35,799
Speaker 1: I'm not trying to be the cute girl that's on

850
00:45:35,840 --> 00:45:39,759
Speaker 1: the TV like you know, I'm operating with business, you know,

851
00:45:39,800 --> 00:45:42,080
Speaker 1: on my son and all this stuff. I was really like,

852
00:45:42,200 --> 00:45:45,359
Speaker 1: I want this to really be my reality or I'm

853
00:45:45,400 --> 00:45:48,880
Speaker 1: not doing it, you know. And that's the most powerful

854
00:45:48,920 --> 00:45:50,440
Speaker 1: thing about the whole thing. So I can't wait for

855
00:45:50,440 --> 00:45:51,880
Speaker 1: you guys to see that because I'm sure we'll be

856
00:45:51,920 --> 00:45:55,120
Speaker 1: talking soon once you guys see it. Yes, we well

857
00:45:55,640 --> 00:45:59,239
Speaker 1: and on there too and his wife. Yeah, I tryed

858
00:45:59,280 --> 00:46:01,400
Speaker 1: to watch that one. But Sabrina, thank you so much.

859
00:46:01,440 --> 00:46:04,280
Speaker 1: We appreciate you again from being self transparent and open

860
00:46:04,280 --> 00:46:06,880
Speaker 1: about everything, and we are wishing you the best. We

861
00:46:06,880 --> 00:46:09,799
Speaker 1: can't wait to see who you end up with next. Right, Well,

862
00:46:09,800 --> 00:46:12,239
Speaker 1: I'll say this that you're ready for. Are you ready

863
00:46:12,239 --> 00:46:13,799
Speaker 1: to move on to a new relationship or do you

864
00:46:13,800 --> 00:46:15,239
Speaker 1: feel like you need to take some time off of

865
00:46:15,280 --> 00:46:18,360
Speaker 1: love before you take that step again. Oh, I'm definitely

866
00:46:18,400 --> 00:46:23,279
Speaker 1: not ready at all because I'm struggling with like just

867
00:46:23,360 --> 00:46:26,480
Speaker 1: trusting who people are. But there is someone that I'm

868
00:46:26,480 --> 00:46:32,279
Speaker 1: getting to know, okay, and and you know, um he

869
00:46:32,880 --> 00:46:35,760
Speaker 1: you know, he checks off some boxes, which is good.

870
00:46:35,800 --> 00:46:38,399
Speaker 1: You know those things I mentioned earlier, things that I

871
00:46:38,440 --> 00:46:42,680
Speaker 1: need those qualities, um, and so just literally getting to

872
00:46:42,760 --> 00:46:48,720
Speaker 1: know you know who he does. Yet there's nothing happening

873
00:46:48,719 --> 00:46:53,160
Speaker 1: with these boxes. Um. But yeah, so and just learning like, Okay,

874
00:46:53,280 --> 00:46:55,880
Speaker 1: even if it's really exciting in the beginning, just learning

875
00:46:55,880 --> 00:46:59,280
Speaker 1: how to slow that down. You know, it's always exciting,

876
00:46:59,320 --> 00:47:04,400
Speaker 1: and it again always right, and it's so exciting, like

877
00:47:04,480 --> 00:47:06,720
Speaker 1: you ignore the red flags. The flags just be waving.

878
00:47:06,760 --> 00:47:09,759
Speaker 1: You'd be like, but I'm having so much fun, you know,

879
00:47:09,840 --> 00:47:13,000
Speaker 1: I don't want to see that. So my therapist, she

880
00:47:13,239 --> 00:47:15,600
Speaker 1: does a really good job with just giving me other

881
00:47:15,719 --> 00:47:19,319
Speaker 1: things to think about and focus on, to kind of

882
00:47:19,360 --> 00:47:22,080
Speaker 1: negate the excitement of getting to know someone, you know,

883
00:47:22,239 --> 00:47:25,600
Speaker 1: like keeping me in touch with reality, you know, continuing

884
00:47:25,640 --> 00:47:29,759
Speaker 1: to focus on me my needs. Um, just different practices.

885
00:47:30,040 --> 00:47:33,200
Speaker 1: Because she was a part of our relationship and she

886
00:47:33,280 --> 00:47:36,040
Speaker 1: was like, this time, we don't get to notice person.

887
00:47:36,440 --> 00:47:38,600
Speaker 1: You know, when she saw everything happening, she was like,

888
00:47:38,640 --> 00:47:41,359
Speaker 1: I can't believe Lamar, we'll do that, we'll say that,

889
00:47:41,640 --> 00:47:44,440
Speaker 1: And I was like, neither did I. You know, obviously

890
00:47:44,480 --> 00:47:47,960
Speaker 1: we didn't notice man. So just that part is the

891
00:47:48,040 --> 00:47:50,520
Speaker 1: part was scared that. I'm like, I'm not ready because

892
00:47:51,160 --> 00:47:53,399
Speaker 1: I don't trust what you're saying to be true yet,

893
00:47:53,680 --> 00:47:56,200
Speaker 1: you know, And that's not his problem. It's my problem,

894
00:47:56,360 --> 00:47:59,319
Speaker 1: you know, that's my insecurity. So I have to do

895
00:47:59,360 --> 00:48:01,239
Speaker 1: the work to get in the place where I can

896
00:48:01,239 --> 00:48:04,680
Speaker 1: be like, Okay, exactly what you're saying is what it is,

897
00:48:04,760 --> 00:48:06,759
Speaker 1: and even if it isn't, I'm in a healthy enough

898
00:48:06,800 --> 00:48:11,239
Speaker 1: space to respond to it so that don't come later. Um,

899
00:48:11,280 --> 00:48:14,080
Speaker 1: I have so many things going on. The show's coming

900
00:48:14,080 --> 00:48:17,279
Speaker 1: out that I just did a sneak about My skin

901
00:48:17,320 --> 00:48:19,560
Speaker 1: care line is coming out, My athletic apparel line is

902
00:48:19,600 --> 00:48:23,640
Speaker 1: coming out. Yeah, It's like I'm literally and talk to

903
00:48:23,640 --> 00:48:29,520
Speaker 1: the chemists now, full skin care line, you know, cosmetics line, Um,

904
00:48:29,560 --> 00:48:32,280
Speaker 1: you know, rebranding my hole to bring up our fitness.

905
00:48:32,320 --> 00:48:35,520
Speaker 1: So that's all day, every day, you know, So to

906
00:48:35,640 --> 00:48:37,440
Speaker 1: have time for a man, it's like I really have

907
00:48:37,560 --> 00:48:41,200
Speaker 1: to make it to be honest, and I haven't had

908
00:48:41,239 --> 00:48:44,640
Speaker 1: like a week of no Lamar Odom news yet, which

909
00:48:44,680 --> 00:48:48,000
Speaker 1: is important. Like and he's not not gonna happen anytime

910
00:48:48,080 --> 00:48:53,680
Speaker 1: soon coming up, I know. So it's like that's important

911
00:48:53,719 --> 00:48:58,080
Speaker 1: to undertook consider like I need space where it's just like, wow,

912
00:48:58,120 --> 00:49:03,040
Speaker 1: there's been nothing about Lamar to you know, Like I know,

913
00:49:03,400 --> 00:49:05,400
Speaker 1: I know, but that's important for me to move on

914
00:49:05,480 --> 00:49:07,799
Speaker 1: to the next chapter. It's like, and I'm not talking

915
00:49:07,800 --> 00:49:10,879
Speaker 1: about the stuff that maybe on his page. I'm talking

916
00:49:10,920 --> 00:49:13,600
Speaker 1: about like in my personal life, the things that he's

917
00:49:13,640 --> 00:49:16,400
Speaker 1: not going to mention and be honest about that are

918
00:49:16,640 --> 00:49:19,360
Speaker 1: happening and being said. It's like I need that to

919
00:49:19,520 --> 00:49:23,480
Speaker 1: clear up before I can really say I'm in this

920
00:49:23,600 --> 00:49:27,000
Speaker 1: next relationship, you know, because that may cause some insecurities

921
00:49:27,000 --> 00:49:30,200
Speaker 1: with any guy, Like okay, we've still gotten having to

922
00:49:30,239 --> 00:49:33,040
Speaker 1: do this on the phone, you know. So, Um, you're right,

923
00:49:33,080 --> 00:49:36,440
Speaker 1: it's not gonna happen anytime soon, but God willing it

924
00:49:36,480 --> 00:49:41,160
Speaker 1: will happen because like it'll just he'll just be gone

925
00:49:41,280 --> 00:49:44,080
Speaker 1: somewhere and I don't and you can be able to

926
00:49:44,120 --> 00:49:46,880
Speaker 1: move on in a healthy environment and you all look

927
00:49:46,920 --> 00:49:48,960
Speaker 1: back and be like damn, I went through some ship.

928
00:49:49,200 --> 00:49:51,719
Speaker 1: It's the lessons, it's the lesson. As long as you

929
00:49:51,719 --> 00:49:54,399
Speaker 1: can take the life for its lessons and learn from

930
00:49:54,400 --> 00:49:56,520
Speaker 1: it and move on, is never a loss. It's a

931
00:49:56,600 --> 00:50:01,600
Speaker 1: lesson being out. We appreciate you so much again behind

932
00:50:01,680 --> 00:50:04,040
Speaker 1: every Man and then we're looking forward to what we

933
00:50:04,120 --> 00:50:06,120
Speaker 1: are going to watch the reality show too and see

934
00:50:06,120 --> 00:50:09,960
Speaker 1: how that plays out. That's a good but much support

935
00:50:10,000 --> 00:50:12,640
Speaker 1: to you and much love. Thank you with all your

936
00:50:12,640 --> 00:50:15,200
Speaker 1: adventures and everything you've got going on. Thank you. Same

937
00:50:15,239 --> 00:50:17,719
Speaker 1: to you, gud, Thank you baby, alright. Thanks